#I love putting this bitch into situations

[slutsareteacherstoo]

Gonna be blasting all these songs that came up below like wow, Reina. You got me fr. Its highkey a sign for me. Like lemme not block my blessings and get my shit together real quick but amazing

First up gon be that Keyshia Cole

Me reading the warnings more clearly know and sending praise 😩🙏🏿

OH SHE IS FREE?!?! GRACIAS MI REINA 🙏🏿🧎🏿‍♀️I WAS STRESSING!!!!! but damn that’s not freedom frfr but she out!

Come on inner dialogue tingz!!! 🗣️🗣️ “Guilt was burning across all of my deepest thoughts, creating a pile of self-doubt and resentment in the crevices of every memory— happy, sad, or indifferent.”

“For me, it was like carrying around a burden of responsibility that was far too delicate and overwhelming. As hard as I fought to keep the world inside my head unburdened by the plague of self-doubt, I failed— forgetting just how easy it is for me to self-destruct without the slightest potential of reprieve.” Its giving sisyphus😪free my girl fr!!!!

Shit that freaked me out but i too would freak out and had i heard someone fall to the floor

“I was battling the urge to do what I normally do—spew hateful words until the other person retreats. For the first time in my life, my body and mind actually agreed with my heart. I couldn't do it. Nothing would come out no matter how many times I opened my mouth— no words word forms and all sounds were deafened on my lips. I was unconsciously saving myself from myself, and, in this fight, I was my only opponent.” - you be writing poetry? 🧐🤨 just curious 🤓 it’s very lyrical, very verse!!! I like that last sentence.

OH GOT HE TOGETHER REAL QUICK!!!!!

Nah Havana. We nuh av dat!!!! 😤 THE PERSON IN FRONT IS SHOWING YOU THEY LOVE YOU BABY YOU NOT PRETENDING!! And ol boy knows its not an act 😩

“…Today might not be that day, but dammit if I don't try.” - well *claps hands* so when’s the wedding??? 🤭 no but that was some real shit. This IS some real shit. Havana’s inability to accept her relationship with Terry and his love for her for what it is is def a situation ik all too well, even when all the conditions are met that doesn’t change the mindfuck and guilt can be consuming. And also like being able too see the grey. Cuz like yes 🙄 Vana couldve reeled it in a bit but/and/also Terry was being communicative and ignored Vana when she brought up what happened and how it clearly bothered her. So the moral is that there’s shared accountability in all this!!!

*LEARN SOMETHING FROM THIS*

Yes we love big bawling, emotional Terry being raw and vulnerable

“Go to sleep. I'll be right here when you wake up,” I cooed into his ear.” 🥺🥺

“I love you,” I said softly, kissing Terry's head. “I just gotta figure out how… how to love me, too.” - WHEW THATLL DO IT!!!!! 😭

Not his voice metro booming i wouldve [redacted] right there

“Nah…. Not Daddy. Terry. That's my name tonight. Okay?” he said, pressing me further into the mattress.” - THEY GON BE MAKING LOVE TONIGHT YALL 😫 play “Can You Feel the Love Tonight” by Elton John

OH SHIT WE DOIN AFFIRMATIONS NOW?!?!

I blinked in between the pumps like sorry Vana. scooch over real quick i need to hear this 😅🙈

HEY SIRI PUT THAT DESTIN CONRAD “IT’S YOURS” ON REPEAT!!!

Lmaooo ok ok ok Reina 😌Mi Reina you’ve redeemed yourself in the eyes of your public. Now i know (partially)why you had the girls [gender neutral] up in arms. But wow!!!

This was sooo disarming. Like you stripped me raw and got me reflecting like fuck. I don’t do fisticuffs but that anger and being quick to use it on people who aren’t careful. Them words could cut a bitch fr!!! But like wow im like taken aback and in awe. Like shoutout to Vana for seeing herself through it. I mean Terry helped or whatever 🙄 but again Vana did the heavy lifting and thT makes me soo proud to see.

And you’ve done such an amazing job crafting these characters, esp your OC and making her face her shit and be real with herself, always for the better. Like chile lemme get myself together so I can be present in my future relationships like damn. It took me a minute to catch up but it was actually perfect timing. Like wow.

Im constantly blown away by you and seeing you expand in your craft. Ik im a behind but ik that means theres more in store to give flowers to always 💜

Big Mama Pt. 12 | Enough

Pairing: Terry Richmond x Plus Size Fem Black!OC

Wordcount: +5.1K

Warnings: MDNI (18+) mature content, such as cursing, light smut (fingering), heavily dialogue-centered, angst, verbal argument, self-deprecation

🦋Big Mama (series) => 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11

Early That Morning

“Monnie, I don't know… Everything is just…,” I said, crying softly.

“Girl! If you don't just praise God right quick, and call that man to thank him.” Monnie said, smacking her lips. She was understandably agitated with my response. Was it lackluster? Yes, but I didn't know what to say or do about it. I didn't want to seem ungrateful, but I honestly wasn't happy with the outcome.

After almost three weeks of pure hell, I received a call from a lawyer that Terry himself hired. I was told the conditions for maintaining my freedom as I was currently living in the aftermath of the incident between Terry, me, and Taylor. It was finally over, but here I was still crumbling under the weight of it all.

The terms and conditions were as follows:

Terry agrees not to sue Taylor as long as she agrees not to sue me.

Terry agrees not to file and pursue criminal charges against Taylor as long as she agrees to drop the charges against me and forfeit her right to refile.

I would not be allowed to approach Taylor in any public setting, but we could be present in the same vicinity.

There would be no established restraining order from Taylor against me, just a peace order since we have no standing or pre-existing relationship.

Terry's family agreed to take care of any outstanding medical bills for Taylor, along with her receiving a small undisclosed amount.

The records would be expunged after 90 days.

The terms were simple and clear. I just hated how much Terry had to give up for it. The outcome was obviously unfavorable and one-sided. The single impartial party who deserved justice and compensation received none— Terry. Because of that, I felt like crawling into a hole and never resurfacing. Guilt was burning across all of my deepest thoughts, creating a pile of self-doubt and resentment in the crevices of every memory— happy, sad, or indifferent.

My faith in love had been tainted by my own doing not because I didn't think Terry loved me but because I felt like he shouldn't. Every voice in my head told me I was and should've been deemed unlovable years ago. Honestly, a person like me is not capable of accepting a love as pure as Terry's. For me, it was like carrying around a burden of responsibility that was far too delicate and overwhelming. As hard as I fought to keep the world inside my head unburdened by the plague of self-doubt, I failed— forgetting just how easy it is for me to self-destruct without the slightest potential of reprieve.

2 Hours Later

KNOCK

KNOCK

KNOCK

KNOCK

I was startled awake by the thunder of someone pounding on my front door. I had fallen asleep on the loveseat in my living room.

Jumping up, I attempted to make my way to the door. I used the oversized plush blanket as a cover and held it tightly against my body. I was only wearing a sports bra and micro-biker shorts.

As I walked around the edge of the coffee table, the blanket snagged the corner and positioned itself under my feet. My right foot got trapped in the sea of fabric, causing me to crash onto the floor. My knees collided with the laminated wood with vigor. I had no time to lick my wounds.

“Shit!” I yelled.

At this point, I was more than agitated. I tore the blanket off of me and tossed it to the floor. Using the arm of the recliner, I regained my footing and stood up. I placed my hands on my hips and drew in a deep breath as my body registered the pain from the fall.

Before I could make another move, the knocking began again. This time, the sounds were harder and louder.

KNOCK

KNOCK

KNOCK

KNOCK

Each knock sounded off, shaking the front door. I paused in fear. My anxiety peaked as my mind began to race with disturbing thoughts. I wasn't expecting visitors, so who was this?

“I can hear you inside, ‘Vana. Please, just open the door.” said a muffled voice from outside.

No. No. No. It couldn't be. Why would he be here?

“Terry?!” I yelled back in confusion and relief.

“Yes, baby! Now, can you open the door? We really need to talk,” he said.

I remained frozen in place. Losing the ability to hear, Terry's voice began to drown out.

“Havana!” he yelled again.

“Uh, Terry. I just… I don't…,” I whimpered loudly.

Before any coherent thoughts left my lips, the door swung open. I couldn't help but stare at Terry in shock.

“How the fuck……,” I asked as I approached him slowly.

“I had a key made months ago. I wanted it for emergencies. This counts as an emer….,” Terry said.

“Terry! Get out! Now!” I yelled. I was beyond frustrated and tired.

Today has worn me thin, and my patience was at its lowest. I wasn't in the mood for tolerating any form of nonsense or mess.

“No! Havana, baby… We need to talk, and I'm not leaving until we do.”

I knew I owed Terry an apology, a conversation, and everlasting grace; but I couldn't even find it in me to give myself the same.

I was battling the urge to do what I normally do—spew hateful words until the other person retreats. For the first time in my life, my body and mind actually agreed with my heart. I couldn't do it. Nothing would come out no matter how many times I opened my mouth— no words word forms and all sounds were deafened on my lips. I was unconsciously saving myself from myself, and, in this fight, I was my only opponent.

“Havana, look at me!” Terry said, grabbing my chin. Oh, how a firm yet loving hand can change things. My heart fluttered and skipped in my chest as his fingers stoked the surface of my skin.

“Terry… I… I'm sorry,” I said as tears finally broke free. “You… Y-you deserve more than I can give you. I want… I want you to be happy. I just don't think that can happen with me.”

“Mama, don—,” Terry said.

“No! Terry, just lea—leave. Please!” I yelled, pushing him away.

“Havana,” Terry said, grabbing my arms. His eyes dropped to meet mine.

Yanking away from him, I yelled again, “Ter—!”. Before I could finish, Terry's face shifted into a look of utter aggravation.

“That's it! Havana Rose,…. sit down or I'll sit you down,” Terry muttered through gritted teeth as he pointed towards the couch.

I stood there for a second frozen in shock. I never expected Terry to put up this much of a fight.

“Aight, I'm done. I'm sick—,” he started to speak as he picked me up and tossed me over his shoulder, “—of this shit!”.

Terry began to carry me down the hall. I pushed against his back in a feeble attempt to be released. I knew struggling was pointless, but I wasn't ready for the conversation Terry clearly wanted to have.

As we rounded the corner of my bedroom door, I could feel the tears falling with ease. There was no noise leaving my body as I silently wept. I should've prepared for this more productively. Instead, I tried to choose a coward's way out, and Terry wasn't having it.

Like always, life had a weirdly tumultuous way of making me confront my feelings.

Placing me on the bottom edge of my bed, Terry stood in front of me. His eyes scanned my face as he watched me teeter on the edge of implosion.

“Hav—,” Terry started. He squatted down in front of me and rested his hands on my knees.

As much as I wanted this to end, one question was burning through my mind— heavy and bitter as it weighed on my tongue. Unfortunately for me, the four words could not be swallowed back down, allowing the unpleasantness of the discontent to fester in the back of my throat. I knew how to rectify this feeling, and I knew how to pacify the voices in my head. But, should I, and did I deserve it?

“Do you love me?” I asked, avoiding Terry's gaze. I could see his lips begin moving, so I placed my hand over his mouth. “No, just listen to me. I want you to think about what happened. I can't even control my anger. W-what if… you wake up one day and finally realize y-you… deserve better… than me. I'm sick of pretending like… like I'm enough. Terry, we both know I'll never be enough, so let's just end this now,” I spoke barely above a whisper.

Terry's hands lifted to rest on my shoulders. As his eyes pleaded with me, I saw a glimmer of something I wish I didn't— hesitation and uncertainty. I slowly pushed his hands off my shoulders, waiting for him to just say what we already knew.

Terry didn't love me. He loved what he thought I—

“’Vana, let's get something clear. I love you with all my fuckin' heart. Just saying I love you isn't enough for me because you're everything to me. What can I do to show you that? Huh? Tell me, love. What can I do?”

I hung my head in defeat. Most women would be swooning over this, but it only added another layer to the guilt that was consuming me. Now, he was giving me unconditional love when I couldn't even allow myself the space to apologize.

“Terry, no. Please, just—,” I choked, wiping away tears.

“No, you stop. Stop beating yourself up about this. I understand that what I did made you doubt me, but don't ever feel like the problem was you. I was. I did it. All of this is on me. If I would have been man enough to tell you the truth about what happened, there wouldn't have been a fight. That one mistake caused all of this. This is my fault, not yours. And—,” he spewed breathlessly.

“Terry…,” I interrupted him.

“No, let me finish. Believe me, when I say this, I'll fight the devil himself for you. I'll climb the mountains in heaven just to find you again. I don't think you understand me, baby. I love every part of you. I hope that one day you can see that. Today might not be that day, but dammit if I don't try.”

Terry stood at his full height, towering over me. His eyes were bright yet somehow lacking their normal vitality, seeming to be void of any indication of happiness. It became clear to me that this was wearing Terry down just as much as it was me. As much as I wanted him to give up, the idea of causing him such grief and fatigue weighed heavily on my heart.

He drew his hands into fists as I watched his eyes. His face became flustered, and his breathing became ragged. Every breath choppier than the last. I could sense something brewing inside of him. His hands were shaking slightly as they rested by his side. As he unclenched and clenched his fists, his bottom lip began to quiver. His eyes glossed over, and his gaze became lethargic. No… No… This couldn't be happening.

“Terry, I'm sorry. I just feel like we can't—,” I said, standing from the bed.

Tears were streaming from Terry's eyes. The strength in his face was faltering right before my eyes.

I slowly reached out to touch his face, stroking his cheek while I wiped away the tears. He grabbed my hand, holding it tightly against his cheek.

“These… these last few weeks have been pure hell for me. I missed you so much, mama. It's like for the first… for the first time in my life, I know love; and that's because of you,” he paused for a moment, taking long deep breaths. “It was a funny feeling at first…. and coming to terms with it was hell. You only hear of women wanting to be seen and heard, but now that I know the feeling—. I don't think I could ever go back to what I thought love was.”

“Terry, you really feel that way?” I asked, sobbing with him at this point.

“Yes, it honestly scared me when I realized how much I loved you… Whew… I had to sit with the fact that I had never loved someone that much… and… and I had never been loved properly before you. Baby,… listen to me… I can say this before God and before you… that this is a love worth fighting for. Havana Rose, YOU'RE worth fighting for. Do you… please, tell me you understand,” he sobbed into my hand.

“Terry, baby, I'm so sorry. I didn't want… I just didn't know what to say,” I said, pulling him into a hug.

“You don't have to say anything. Just tell me you're not leaving,” he said, kissing the top of my head.

His hands wrapped around my waist even tighter. I rested my face in his chest and mumbled a quiet no.

How could I leave him, especially now? For the first time, my heart felt— full.

“Thank you, ‘Vana. I love you. Okay?” he said, leaning into me.

“I love you, too,” I confessed, wiping away my tears.

I reached out to touch Terry's face, tracing the outline of his jaw. As if that was all the reassurance he needed, his shoulders dropped slowly. I watched patiently as his body returned to a state of normalcy— shoulders broad, chest out, and head high.

As we stood there silently refusing to let each other go, he let out a long yawn.

“Tired?” I questioned, looking up at him.

“Yeah,” he laughed.

“Wanna take a nap… uh… together?” I asked, praying that he would say yes.

There was nothing I craved more than his touch right now. I needed him bad. Luckily, I didn't have to wait long for his answer.

“Hell, yeah!” he blurted, lifting me. His hands carefully wrapped my legs around his waist.

He kneeled on the edge of the bed, crawling towards the head with me in his arms. He gently laid me in the center of the pillows. I released my legs and let them fall onto the bed.

Finally untangling from each other, Terry lifted himself onto his hands. He scooted down so that his head was resting on my chest. I used one hand to run my fingers through his velvety hair, massaging his scalp with my fingertips. The other hand soothingly rubbed his back like a baby. Terry's arms wrapped under my body, embracing me tightly. I let my lips rest at the top of his head.

“Go to sleep. I'll be right here when you wake up,” I cooed into his ear.

2 Hours Later

Waking up to Terry's body on mine felt like home— a place I'd never been allowed to experience. As I watched his shoulders rise and fall with each breath, I released one of my own. With him here in my arms, I could breathe again.

Terry's presence was a breath of fresh air because, admittedly, he was the air that I breathed. I had never felt so attached to anyone or anything. Every part of him called out to something in me. His voice soothed my soul, his lips electrified whatever they touched, his hands… God, his hands absolved me of my suffering, and his eyes knew how to see my heart.

“I love you,” I said softly, kissing Terry's head. “I just gotta figure out how… how to love me, too.”

Terry's arms adjusted underneath me, causing me to hold my breath. Embarrassment washed over me, warming my skin. I was silently praying that he didn't hear me. Releasing a deep groan after a few minutes, I realized he was in a deep sleep again. His shoulders slumped forward, allowing his body to melt into mine.

Releasing a heavy sigh, I leaned over and kissed Terry's forehead. I knew that lifting this man off of me would be damn near impossible. I was debating on if I should wake him up or not. I shifted to one side so his hold on me would loosen. His arms fell away from my body, allowing me to scoot out from under him— barely. I carefully moved towards the edge of the bed. I slowly turned my body so my feet softly landed on the floor.

I stood from the bed, stumbling as the feeling in my legs returned. They felt like jelly as a deep tingling sensation went to my toes. I kicked my feet and flicked my ankles.

As I sauntered across the room, I heard Terry stir in his slumber. I glanced over my shoulder to see him now on his back. His arm thrown across his chest left him posed so… so… delicately like an angel. Terry’s face alone could render even the most wicked defenseless.

I smiled brightly at the sight of him. I quietly opened the bathroom door. Stopping to stare at the mirror, I took in my appearance. Yikes! I looked like… something, and it wasn't nice.

I mentally made plans to do my hair— or maybe I'll just pay someone.

Using the bathroom as quickly as possible, I reentered the bedroom and dried my hands on a towel. I glanced over at Terry to see his chest still rising and falling. I half-smiled at the sight. Walking towards the door, I entered into the front room. I closed the door softly behind me.

Before I could reach the kitchen, I heard a noise coming from behind me. The springs of my old mattress were loud and alarming.

“Havana! Where are you?!” yelled Terry from the bedroom. I could hear the bed creaking again.

I turned around to walk back to the bedroom door. “Why is this man yelling?” I asked myself quietly as I giggled.

“HAVANA!” Terry yelled even louder than the first time. The tone of his voice contained a sense of urgency and concern. Panic set in for me as soon as I realized the distress in his voice.

Sprinting towards the door, I flung it open. “What's wrong?” I inquired softly.

Terry was seated on the edge of the bed, facing the door. His eyes shot up to meet mine. The look on Terry's face made my heart thump. My breath quickened anxiously. His eyes were red, and his face was flushed. His head swayed on his shoulders as his breathing quieted. His fingers dug into the bed with a ferocious grip.

I approached him slowly. Softening my voice before speaking, I raised my hand to stroke his cheek. “Baby, are you okay?” I asked him.

Terry's eyes darted from my face to the floor. The worried look on his face cut deep as his eyes seemed to search for mine. This was not a look of simple anxiety or worry. His countenance was charged with— despair and desperation.

I leaned over to place kisses on his forehead. “Hey, I'm right here. Wh—,” I whispered as Terry threw his arms around my waist.

He pulled me into a fervent embrace. His arms felt like a second skin against my body. I felt his shoulders fall forward as his body went limp against mine. I couldn't understand the overwhelming range of emotions this man was displaying.

“I… I… I th-thought you were gone,” he said with his face pressed into my belly.

I squatted down in front of him. “Terry, I'm not going anywhere. I promise. I told you that, honey,” I said, cupping his chin in my hand.

He slowly shook his head in understanding as if he was coming to terms with my words.

That's when it hit me. HE THOUGHT I HAD LEFT.

“Terry, look at me. I love you. You big baby,” I said, smiling at him somberly.

“I know. I just panicked I guess. I'm sorry about that,” he said, looking at the floor.

“Awww, don't apologize. I'm okay, papa,” I said, rising on my feet. “You hungry?” I asked him while softly caressing the side of his neck.

His head leaned up slowly as a slight grin spread across his face. “Hell yeah,” he laughed.

Later That Night

“You done, baby?” I asked Terry as I stood from the couch. I held my hand out to take his plate.

“Yeah, here—,” he started. “Wait! Give those here. I got it. You sit down,” he said, taking the plates from me.

“Terry, I could've washed them. It isn't that many.”

“Nah… I told you I got it,” he said, kissing my forehead as he walked past me.

I stood there in silence. This was so adorable to me. How could this man get any cuter?

“Ok. Fine. I'll sit, I guess.” I sat down on the arm of the couch.

Terry entered the kitchen and placed the dishes in the sink. I don't know why, but the sight of this man washing dishes was so… I could feel the butterflies in my tummy going wild.

As I watched his back muscles move, I felt something. I immediately felt my panties grow damp as his shirt clung to every curve and crevice of his body.

I bit my lip as I crossed my legs. Feeling my body come alive, I released a quiet sigh. I needed this man— on me, in me, with me, however.

I repositioned myself with my legs on both sides of the arm of the couch so that I was straddling it. I was losing a silent battle between my mind and my body. I could feel my hips move slowly. There was no way this man had me grinding my pussy against a fuckin' couch. The friction of my labia and clit rubbing against the couch through the thin material of my biker shorts aided in creating the slick pool in the seat of my shorts. I knew they were ruined, but I was too aroused to stop.

I gulped in desperation, trying to fight against whatever this was. I didn't want to attack this man just yet. I knew words needed to be said and feelings needed to be discussed. I looked down at my body, covering my face in shame. I was being betrayed by the only thing I thought I had control over— myself. Every movement I made and thought I had was overpowered by him.

I was suffering, and I knew it. There was only one way to stop it. I had to feed the beast.

With eyes stricken with defeat, I looked over at him. I feverishly hummed in desperation, “Terry. I… um… I-,”.

To my surprise, he was no longer facing the sink. He was looking directly at me. I froze in shame. I watched his eyes lower as his gaze dropped. I dropped my head and looked at the floor.

“You need something, ‘Vana?” Terry asked. His voice boomed through the air. The intense weight of that question landed right where I needed it— my heart and my pussy. I was past hot and bothered. I was in the middle of having a sexual crisis.

I looked back at him and nodded. At this point, I was a needy mess. If Terry so much as touched me, I'd cum. I wanted to speak, but I knew whatever sound my lips released would be lascivious.

“I’m going to ask you again. Do you need something?” Terry asked, leaning forward against the kitchen island.

“Yeessss,” I whined.

“And what do you need?” he asked, moving to the other side of the island.

I drew in a breath and spoke, “YOU! I NEED YOU!”.

The speed at which Terry made it to me was incredible. His movements were so swift and fluid that his feet never made a sound.

His arms wrapped around my body as he picked me up. My legs instantly found their home around his waist. As soon as his gaze met mine, our lips crashed into each other's. His tongue grazed the seam of my lips, begging for entry. I parted my lips and without pause, our tongues went to war. Each of us fighting for more.

I leaned back to catch my breath. I was shocked to discover that we were now standing in my bedroom. I was too wrapped up in that kiss to notice our location changed.

Terry softly placed me in the center of the bed. He slowly lifted his shirt above his head before tossing it across the room. His hands dropped to the top of his waistband.

I watched intently as his hands moved to remove his clothes. I was practically salivating in anticipation for his pants to fall. I knew what I wanted to see. Terry sensed my eagerness and released a rumbly laugh. “Patience, baby,” he said, removing his pants.

My eyes locked into the large tent at the front of his boxers. I reached out to palm the ever-growing bulge in need and desperation. My neediness had slowly built up in the pit of my stomach becoming a slow churning ache. Terry’s hand grabbed mine and brought it to his lips. He began gingerly kissing my inner wrist.

“Daddy,” I whimpered, pulling my hand away.

Terry's demeanor shifted as his hand once again grabbed mine. Interlocking his fingers in mine, he pulled my hand towards his chest. He placed it over his heart while leaning over me.

“Nah…. Not Daddy. Terry. That's my name tonight. Okay?” he said, pressing me further into the mattress.

I stared straight into his eyes. Lost for words was an understatement. For some reason, I fully understood the intention behind his declaration. This was between Havana and Terry, and this was NOT a scene.

Moments Later

“Say it, baby. I wanna hear you say it,” Terry said, placing his mouth back on my nipple. Using nothing but the tip of his tongue, he flicked the overly sensitive bud repeatedly.

My body was growing more and more enraptured by nothing more than Terry's touch. The feeling of his tongue and hands all over my body was intoxicating. I was in love, love drunk, and high off him.

“I'm yours,” I moaned out quietly.

“And… What else?” Terry asked, switching to my other breast.

Pushing my chest up, I wrapped my hands around the back of his head. Fully enthralled in the moment, my grasp on reality slipped.

“I'm… I'm enough. I'm enough,” I rasped almost chanting into the air.

Terry's licks became suckles as one of his hands found a home between my legs.

He moaned as he found pleasure in his own sentiments. “Enough for who?” he asked back in reinforcement.

“For you!” I screamed, feeling myself come undone as two of Terry's fingers pushed into my pussy.

The gasp I let out became trapped in my throat, leaving me choking on air.

“Breathe, ‘Vana. Hey, take a deep breath for me,” Terry pleaded, knitting his eyebrows together in concern.

I swallowed hard and struggled to find air. This was too much. For the first time, I didn't know how to respond or react. The control of my body was no longer in my hands. Terry's voice quickly became the guiding light drawing me to whatever awaited me. Whether that was pleasure, happiness, or a combination of both, I would gratefully accept my fate after wholeheartedly surrendering to his every desire, urge, and craving. I was HIS, and his authority was absolute— there was no doubt about it.

“Look at me. Don't… you… ever… doubt… how much… I… love… you. Understood?” Terry demanded in between kisses as his fingers slowly pumped in and out of me.

“Y-yes. I'm sorry,” I whined, clenching around his fingers.

“All I want you to focus on is breathing. Let me handle everything else,” Terry whispered into my ear.

“Ughh….” I sobbed as tears rolled from the corners of my eyes.

“Baby, I missed you,” he cooed, resting his lips against my chin.

“I… I mi-missed you, too,” I panted breathlessly.

Terry's lips covered mine in a kiss fueled by desire, stealing my breath and filling me with his. A heavenly set of plush full lips left a soft trail of kisses along my chin until they reached the side of my neck. Tongue swiping back and forth over the supple skin. I gasped as I felt his teeth nip on the sensitive area.

Every action led to one conclusion— this was yearning in its purest form. LOVE.

“Talk to me, ‘Vana. I need to hear something,” he whispered into the side of my neck. All while his two fingers were stealing my soul— slowly.

Against my better judgment, I attempted to speak. I whimpered in delirium as my mouth released nothing but haphazard babbles. All poor attempts at speech as words slipped from my recollection. I just hoped, for my sake, that my body could tell Terry what my mouth couldn't.

As I was sinking and falling simultaneously to a place I had never been, a new question arose. Is this what being stripped raw felt like?

Without my permission, Terry had pulled me into a state of vulnerability and surrender. Using only his hands and his tongue, he had left me exposed with nowhere to hide. I was being forced to hand over my heart and soul. I was finding myself with every kiss.

To myself, I was Havana Rose Taylor. A black woman who deserved love in all forms. I was an exquisite piece of art— rare and invaluable. I was flawed yet virtuous, in my own right.

To the man I loved, I was deserving and admirable. I was the world in human form. A woman capable of love— potent and everlasting. I was desirable and alluring in every facet of the terms. I was… HIS.

And most importantly, I was enough— for me and for Terry.

A/N: Remember, I'm open to critiques. I am a little 🤏🏽 sensitive about my writing. Please, don't be too harsh.🥺 Feel free to bring my attention to any typos. Divider by ME (theereina). Also, this work is not to be plagiarized or reposted (on any site other than here on Tumblr). I do NOT give consent for any form of republishing or rewriting.

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[kumasakka]

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ❝𝐍𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐔𝐑 ! ❞

⋆.˚ 𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆. gaku x reader .

⋆.˚ 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘. for once he isn’t staying up late for his video games but instead for you.

⋆.˚ 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓. ~1.5k .

⋆.˚ 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓. fluff. f!reader. noceur - (n.) one who stays up late. mix of canon and self made. spoiler - free . safe for minors! crappy writing. gaku may seem ooc .

　"PLEASE, please, please, please! Can you pick me up?"

As a matter of fact, you never would've thought about you begging for anyone or anything. But here you are, about to break into tears while begging, because your dear friend wouldn't give in to pick you up from school. It wasn't even that much work, considering he was near your school. And the fact you two haven't seen each other for a while — a while means two years.

God who knows what Gaku was doing in those years. You have no idea where that guy was even disappearing with his supposed family! They don't even look an ounce similiar beside their silverly-white hair and those good-looks. Who cares now though? You're in a situation in which you can't waste a second since it was hard as hell to convince someone as lazy as him to do something for you.

"Look, if you told your friends a lie and land into a stupid situation, you gotta get out by yourself." his tired voice was on the speaker, "I ain't getting your ass outta that."

"But we haven't seen each other for so long! Didn't you miss me?! We can play roblox together again." you cried out as quiet as you can, sitting on the damned school toilette.

"I don't know where you live but we can play that without meeting each other." you could only hear him sigh at the other end of the mic.

"That's it, I'm burning your house down in adopt me! I'm stealing your neon pets too, lazy monkey!"

"Yeah, yeah. Good luck."

With those last words the call ended, not in your favor. You slammed your fist against the wall of the cabin and stood up from the toilette seat, not caring if someone else heard you. You roughly put your phone into your pocket of your skirt while storming out of the girls' restroom and returning to your friends, mind sunken deep into furious thoughts.

How could he be so mean? After all the time you've spent together playing shitty video games to cure his boredom! You only thought about him whenever he invited you to play with him. Yeah that summarized up how much you like him, enough to watch him speedrun some games and sticking by his side like glue. "He's such a bitch." you cursed, your rushing turned into walking.

Calmly, you pat down your skirt to remove any wrinkles before sliding the door to the side with a tight smile. "Sorry, guys. My boyfriend is a little tired after returning to japan. I mean he was away for a long time and of course, he also needs some time to get used to here. So he can't pick me up today." the lie slipped out of your lips as if it was second nature as you sat down on your seat again.

"Naw, not even on valentine's day?!" one of your friend exclaimed. "Would've loved to met that dude you're crushing about the whole time."

"Must be hard to führen a long-distance relationship."

"So actually, what if he isn't real? Guys, what if [name] lost her sanity and made up a guy. Or what if he's an online boyfriend and [name] is being an e-kitten 'cause she needs money." you twitched as your friend joked.

"I mean there is a chance. After all, they met on the internet!"

That wasn't a lie though. You did meet Gaku through an underrated game — it wasn't a popular game at all, barely hundred log-in's per day and everyone knew each other. He joined, you two became good friends, traded numbers and after a good amount of time you two met in real life. Mind you, you two were fourteen at that time, dumb enough to trust strangers you met online.

Okay maybe you were the dumb one for blindly trusting him. But if you didn't, you wouldn't have been good friends like today! Four years later. And you crushed so hard on him, you could literally walk the path of shame when you thought about your obsession era. It's fine now! The crush phase calmed down while he was away somewhere. You still can't believe he doesn't trust you enough to tell you where.

"You all are fake as heck." you huffed. "Skipping club today."

"Guys, stop. [name] is already heartbroken enough. No need to add more weight and now she's even skipping club!"

"Thank you, mamacita."

"Stop."

"No way."

　You groaned in annoyance, burrying your head deep into your pillow. You're so stupid. "Maybe it was a little wishful on my part for hoping that he would pick me up! I mean, he probably is really tired." you muttered under your breath. "But it's not like he is never tired! That stupid duck only stays up for his stupid games! Curse them, curse them all! He only thinks about this shit."

Sigh.

"Can't believe I'm crushing on someone like him. Bet he reeks. He should touch grass. Green aura with dead flies." you turned so you could lay on your side, eyes wandering to the chocolate bag on your table. "You simp."

It's already midnight. Hours past valentine's day. And you didn't even get to give him the chocolate yourself. "Stop worrying about that [name]." you told yourself as you closed your eyes for a second. "He's right. It's my own fault for telling my friends he's my boyfriend just because everyone had someone they loved and bragged about."

With that, you covered your face in shame and little embarrassment. "Shit... I'm lucky I didn't ruin our friendship over something as silly as this." what you called silly was actually your feelings. If you didn't act because of your feelings, you wouldn't be so disappointed. You really should start thinking before acting.

"I..." you covered your face with the pillow and grabbed your phone from the nightstand, now laying on your stomach, "really wanted to give him this box."

As soon as you looked up from the soft cushion, the light that was emitted by your phone blinded you for a moment before your eyes got used to it.

× The Love Of My Life (1) missed call

[05:34pm]

"Oh." you let out in surprise. Your eyes widened. "Oh."

"Ah... I should call back." you coughed, about to press the call button. "Wait, it's super late though. He probably isn't awake. Or he is awake and playing some video games like always. But he would've called me though— He did call me. The call was a while ago though. Too early for his usual all-nighters play through."

Calling The Love Of My Life . . .

"Uh... seems like it was the inevitable." you sat up from your bed, eyes looking out of the window. Suddenly, you felt nervous. Yet you did the get much time to prepare because after two rings, the call got accepted.

"Finally called back huh? Were you ignoring me or something?" his voice was on the speaker again.

"Yeah of course..." you awkwardly trailed off and tried to play it off coolly, "and? What'cha doing?"

"Nothing. Chilling on the swing." weird.

"Huh, not even playing your usual midnight games?" you asked curiously.

"Surprisingly not. I was waiting."

"Waiting for what? For my call or what? Is that why you stayed up so late till midnight?" you teased him jokingly.

"Actually yes. I was waiting for you."

You blinked at that before chuckling, confused. "Eh?"

"I was waiting for you at the gate. Skipped club today, didn't you?"

"I..." you gazed to the box on your desk, "stay there. You're at the park, right?"

"Guessed right."

Without wasting another second, you ended the call and stumbled out of the bed, rushing past your desk while grabbing onto the box. "I'm out for a sec'!" you whispered-shouted, not caring to change your pyjama as you got your jacket.

　Panting heavily, you finally reached your destination to the park and frantically looked around to search a certain white-headed guy. 'Chilling on the swing, he said chilling on the swing.' your gaze went to the swing. There he was, comfortably sitting on it without any worries and seemingly enjoying the night sky.

"[name], you're here." he spoke up, eyes following your slow figure. His gaze was glued to you. Even after noticing the little box in your hand. "I've been waiting."

"You're at this specific park since it's near my park, aren't you?" you questioned and already figured him out, your heavy breathing calming down ever so slightly. "Here."

Now he allowed himself to take a look at the box you were holding onto. "Happy late Valentine's day, Gaku." you whispered, taking his hand so he would accept those chocolate. "Make sure to pay me back tenfold." you turned your back to him, cheeks completely red while thinking that you made yourself look like some kind of fool. "Or else I will be very mad at you."

"Happy late Valentine's day. I didn't expect such half-assed confession." you froze at the spot, your head back to the guy whose expression was unclear. "Stayed up for you and this, you know?

WHERE'S THE ›I LOVE YOU‹?"

© 2024 kumasakka — do not plagiarize , copy , modify , translate our work !

a/n's note — what the skibidi did I write

[corgiss]

I know a lot of you follow me for my DCxDP stuff, but unfortunately I have been having a rough time with writing lately and I haven't made much progress on the next entry.

In the meantime, I thought I would mention some facts about this AU that I haven't been able to touch on yet!

1) Dick has hEDS, which I mentioned in part five. When he got the diagnosis, Tim spent months working to create a suit that worked like a body braid (a type of compression gear made for hypermobile folks) without looking like one. Dick hasn't had a sub-lapse on patrol since Tim finished.

2) Jason has fibromyalgia. He doesn't like to talk about it, because a lot of people consider it an excuse or think it's fake. On particularly bad days, he can't even patrol, because he hurts so bad that his gear touching him is painful. Steph takes over patrolling Crime Alley on these days.

3) Pit madness is essentially ecto-starvation. Being somewhat of a ghost himself, Jason requires a small amount of ectoplasm every once in a great while to function at full capacity. The longer he goes without some sort of source (i.e. the Lazarus Pit, a portal, a ghost, etc.) the worse it gets.

3a) Danny's ectoplasmic radiation is enough to stave off this hunger. Jason has felt a lot calmer since Danny showed up; Jason doesn't quite understand why, but Danny's put the pieces together.

4) Dick made Danny and Jason matching t-shirts. Jason’s shirt says “I died and all I got was this t-shirt”. Danny’s says “I died and all I got was this t-shirt (and superpowers)” Danny thinks it’s a lot funnier than Jason does.

5) Being immunocompromised, Tim is theoretically more susceptible to ectoplasmic radiation than the others. It does make him a little sick to be around Danny for too long, but he’ll never tell anyone, because it’s not Danny’s fault.

6) Vlad, on his end, is trying to get Jack and Maddie’s funding cut and licenses stripped. He’s nothing if not a petty bitch, but he also genuinely cares about Danny and wants him safe.

7) As soon as Jason actually meets Jazz in person, he’s gonna be completely head over heels. They both have the Older Sibling thing going on, and Jazz is probably like a third of Jason’s weight but she still bosses him around like she’s not even a little bit frightened by his presence (spoiler; she’s not even a little bit frightened) and he loves how ready she is to take over a situation and lead everyone through a perfect plan.

7a)He hasn’t had a lot of people he felt this way about, so he promptly flips his shit when he realizes.

That’s all I have to share for now, but I hope y’all enjoy the fun facts 🥰

[heckhellstuff]

My AUs ? Incomprehensible

Here's a doodle dump of bestie Guide Ranging from few days to 6+ months old

I have so so so much more But my dumb little AU went off the rails so badly i have no idea if anyone would listen to my insanity- Guide mentioning she used to lead an Inquisition gave me terminal brainrot and whatever this is crawled out

[marzipanilla]

idk how into(if at all) you are to actual plays, but that comment immediately made me think 'ah yes cave water! your favorite meal' Dimension20 is a gift when I have the focus for it... (I drink a lot of water mostly lol)

Your mom was empress of a planet that went through a major disaster and the only thing you can express about her is that she loved your dad? I think your depth of understanding is horribly limited there, kid, or you were kept so insanely sheltered !! Did they just keep his ass in the palace and not let him see the world?? What if Mark tried to retroactively tell him about the destruction and he refused to believe him?? He was shown being out among the bodies when Mark got recovered !! did you think everyone was covered in paint, like seriously wtf.

I keep staring at the puddles of world building waiting for them to drop into deep wells and its just an inch of shiny oil on gravel like. You dont have to get into but you can reference stuff! Mark claimed Cecil protected him from seeing the extent of the damage, extend that!! There WAS a court case, but Cecil had it thrown out/made it so the government wouldn't press charges bc he needed Mark on his side in case his dad came back!! just !! so many solutions !! He put Damien into hell for daring to threaten to expose what Nolan had done, he can toss a fucking court case.

lol Mark just having a full jar of assorted teeth would be something. Debbie having to stop doing tooth fairy shit and come up w some reason why they wont leave him money anymore lol

A good bit of reality distortion/mind control is fabulous!! tricks to snap them out of it, emotional appeals to snap them out of it... people acting in odd ways not just bc of what they're doing but suddenly reacting to other characters than the ones everyone expected!! why are you so extra vicious to this person you didnt seem to have much interaction w... why is this other capable of calming you down but not the one you say is important to you... mff. tasty.

Yeah Nolan getting hero worshiped and turned into their ruler is brushed over way too damn quick. like sir. Not only do I think you lack any skills to lead an actual population, you agreed to that. 'it was nice to have a purpose again'. You can help them out without being their fucking boss. Just like Immortal, this bitch doesn't know how to say no. I do think he has a 'cant go back/will never see her again' thought process re: Debbie, but like... if you hadn't been taken by the viltrumites, either they never showed up or he and Mark were successful, once a little more time had passed... How long until he would have had the same I miss her thought? What was your actual relationship w Andressa like?? why did you fucking agree to it?? we get 1 kiss, 1 hug, and 1 time he says her name in an annoyed tone of voice. like sir. I definitely have a big split re: some canon deviations between comic and show for Thraxa, but the show is really just like 'incredibly depressed man fucks president of his fan club accidentally knocks her up' and its just like... how much of that relationship were you just thinking about Debbie? how fucked up is that for Andressa?? If Mark had been on Thraxa with him longer, how long would it have taken for Debbie to come up again?? What the fuck did Nolan actually say about his previous family bc quite frankly what Andressa says just raises more fucking questions.

And these people, just like on Earth, never experienced anything bad from him until the day he fucked off and wasnt seen again like. Nolan really does avoid negative fallout in social situations so hard. He is so fucked up about what happened that he wants to be ritually executed, and that is a mood- but I need to see him stuck around the actual people he directly hurt. for more than one fucking day, or like, half a day in the case of Mark on Thraxa.

Allen's first stop after busting out w Nolan is getting him a chastity belt lol 'have you ever heard of condoms??' Mark seemed pretty beat up about you having another kid and I dont want him sad next time I talk to him..

No lie I almost wrote 'Nolan depression fucks his way across the galaxy and has like, 5 kids when he runs into Debbie again' into a story before deciding I just didn't want to deal w it even tho I could see it happening lol

Yeah. I wonder how much of that divide is related to 'want to chars to have nice things' and 'want my char to suffer horribly' but whump is its own thing and precious cinnamon-roll too good for this world does get the shit beat out of them plenty too. idk, the infinite wonders and variety of life I guess.

Mark agreeing to go hang out on a beach w Debbie instead of refusing and the beach is Beach City (am now officially thinking too much about this crossover lol)

The way I got caught up on our back and forth I almost forgot this, lol! AND OH MY GOODNESS, IMAGINE? I forget exactly what which point Debbie makes the beach offer, but I’d love when exactly in SU/SUF-timeline they’d go? There’s something so fucking funny to me about them going during the SUF-timeline and always narrowly missing the strange, Steven-shaped mental breakdowns in the back. I know those don’t occur in a single day, but it’s tickling me. How could they miss anything? I don’t know I just think it’s funny.

Though, post-SUF is interesting if Gems can see the similar “world on your shoulders”, Mark has going on! Steven can shunt the narrative in the Gems’ minds, which I think is neat, if I’m not misusing the phrase since the guy’s on the road far away. Or maybe it’s just before Steven goes and they stumble into each other. I’d kinda love Pearl and Debbie interacting, honestly, if they could talk about loving someone who hurt you, hide things from you, even when you thought you knew them so deeply, and they left you to raise a child. Pearl being in a well adjusted space, and Debbie still grieving.

Honestly, the gems could help train Mark, they’re got experience and similar-ish powers in strength, sturdiness, and they can jump/run fast enough for flying to be vaguely similar enough to lecture about, I think. Or Lapis Lazulis, haha! Peridot with her trash can lid! Garnet, I’d love to see if she told Mark anything about his future in vague, well meaning advice. Or even giving relationship advice considering Amber. Or, importantly, how to convince an entire reign to end their colonizing ways, lol. Is Mark perhaps willing to start a war, take advantage of being related to any leaders, or fake his own death to varying results?

In general, there’s something so fucking funny to me about Nolan, in the sake of comparison, being Pink Diamond coded. Like OH, did an important or well respected of the colonizing empire come to earth and learn the beauty of its people and nature, including faking/lying/omitting things about his identity and background to being in, only to feel conflicted when his responsibility still remained, and he tried to free himself from them? Yikes! We’ve been through that before! Like gimme Pink Diamond and Nolan outfit swap rn. This is tickling me so much oh my goodness.

[mohntilyet]

i have to be so real. sometimes you have to outright not give a shit what the author thinks. i’m not saying to disregard how a character is portrayed and give into fanon characterisations but sometimes i will see fans be like “(head writer) omggg do you think this character is a good person?” “how would this character react if xyz happened?” as though that’s not a question you can and have to answer for yourself.! any character can contain multitudes and if you keep limiting your perception of them solely on word of god its not fun for the writer or even yourself anymore. THINK FOR YOURSELF. INVENT NEW WAYS TO FUCK YOUR FAVORITE CHARACTERS OVER

[fiendishartist2]

smth i think ppl get wrong when writing jon is that he has to be a bitch but he cant be cruel. if you take away his bitchyness its not jon anymore, he just becomes a fanon husk of himself. but if you make him too mean, then you're forgetting the awkward politeness and humanity of jonathan sims. remember: he may be a stubborn dickhead, but he let martin stay in the archives without having to be asked, even back in season 1

[tvckerwash]

you know, an interpretation of ct that I don't see that I personally really love is that she's a fuck up. like yes she's cool and she has some good fight scenes, but a huge part of her character is that she makes mistakes. the mistakes that she makes are ones that on their own aren't the end of the world, but she keeps making these little mistakes, and they eventually add up until she's out of room to make any more.

a really good example of this phenomenon in action is the actions she took leading up to her final confrontation with carolina and tex.

strike one, she thought she saw something in the water, but when asked by the leader what it was, she brushed it off as nothing when even if it had been nothing, it would've been smart to tell him what she thought she saw.

strike two, she didn't sense or notice florida's presence when the leader did, and she looks at the leader twice, once as she pulled out her magnums, and again after she did a scan of the room, almost like she was looking at him for guidance before he finds florida and takes him out with one good axe throw.

strike three, she couldn't convince the leader to leave when they had the chance to get away, and her cheap tricks were not enough to hold off either tex or carolina in a fight. they were only good for incapacitating her opponents enough for her to get away, which doesn't work when she has no escape.

ct is not tex, or carolina, or south. she is not a one woman army who can get herself out of trouble when she's stuck in tough situations. she needs people who can watch her back, she need a team who can cover her when she does mess up, and the leader and his team were not those people. she couldn't bring herself to trust them, and they couldn't bring themselves to trust her, and that cost all of them their lives.

[7roaches]

sorry for absolute zero art i actually started getting my shit together and committed to college n got straight a’s n glowing up n shit

[charliespringverse]

i think it should be possible to scream without making any noise or disturbing anyone or inviting any questions . just sometimes . as a treat .

[spicynectarines]

Lakita is not built for this weather

[shima-draws]

Law being SECONDS away from having a conniption and Zoro just letting him scream at him without batting an eye is SO fucking funny PLEASE

[kyoupann]

I've said it before and I'll say it again: I have never given a single fuck about anime figurines but oh have those little nendoroid levi and erwin bitches consumed my brain. They are so stinking cute I don't even mind the price that much lmao.

[lostandbackagain]

not a normal thing to think about probably but I'm trying to plan my election night.. do I want to watch it live literally paralyzed until PA is called or do I knock myself out and check first thing in the morning?? and if I wait until the morning where do I check?? can I bear finding out who won via the destiel meme? so much to decide

[dwtdog]

the fact that i havent even gone on twitter in days and also don't have a upset tummy shows so much. i dont care anymore like yes she obviously is hurt and needs help and george could've checked more but unless something insane happened i do not care and i do not care about performative ass cc's who use terf terminology and logic

amen

[devilishdelights]

some mermay dateables + trio (what do we call them?) and what i think they’d be !! :]

diavolo i’m thinking a big ass grand octopus

barbatos is that alien looking squid at the bottom of the ocean. it suits him

luke is a clown fish LMAO or a sea angel (hoihoi)

i’m thinking simeon as a white + black koi fish!! i just thought up of that today and i really like the idea

thirteen vampire squid (ty lex)

mephisto. seahorse. like what else would he be

idk about solomon or raphael though!!