#I love my friend though she’s so funny
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According to my friend (same friend who called Kobra “Cars for kids”) Gabe Saporta’s name is no longer Gabe but Gabby
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Mizuki and Date though like. Imagine being 8 and your parents are filthy rich and going through a bad divorce. Your mom treats you like shit, lashing out at you, hitting you, saying she wishes you were never born all because you were behaving like a child. Your dad is more comforting, but he doesn’t do anything to stop the abuse and he spends his time invested in a completely different family, a girl who you love and look up to but he loves her more than you and it fucking shows. Then your dads new friend, some fucking bachelor in his late 20s, is just like "wow you guys are the worst fucking parents ive ever seen" and next thing you know your dad is sending you off to live with him. And it’s just a massive kick in the head cuz you go from a rich lifestyle to living in some really shitty tiny ass apartment with this guy who’s clearly never been around a child in his entire life and he doesn’t know how to behave and does a really bad job of censoring himself like he has a bunch of dirty magazines that he can’t hide very well cuz it’s literally a studio apartment and also he talks to himself sometimes, it’s really weird. He doesn’t even have the slightest clue what he’s doing
And he’s the best parent you’ve ever had
Because fuck, it all really hurts. You have to cope with having never received any love from anyone, and with the fact that your parents clearly don’t want you and can’t even be bothered to send you with anyone even kinda responsible. And this guy has a scary job with crazy hours and you don’t know anything about him and neither does he. But still, he never once hits you or tells you you’re not allowed to cry. He just gives you space and doesn’t push you to feel any sort of way about him. And sometimes, he’s even kind. He makes you some stew, even though it’s a bit chunky. He lets you sleep in the bed and takes the couch for himself, even though he complains about the massive back pain he’d never trade his spot for a second. He pays attention to events at your school and gives you your favorite stuffed animal when you make good grades, even though you called it ugly. He gets worried sick when you come home with bruises and puts on a goofy voice and trains you to defend yourself and you develop some highly deadly skills and even though it’s really abnormal, he buys you a bench press so you can get stronger. There’s this distance there, and you feel really weird caring about someone who you aren’t related to, but you find yourself wishing it was meant to be like this all along, that maybe, he’s secretly your real dad and he loves you like his real daughter
And when you say "I’m back" he says "welcome home"
#aitsf#ai the somnium files#kaname date#mizuki date#THE DATES THEY ARE MY EVERYTHING AAAAAAAAA#its so funny though like imagine being such a bad parent that some loner who jerks off all the time does a better job than you#and hes literally never interacted with children before and is later revealed to have actually been an assassin#renju and shoko really just suck huh#and i dont mean to reduce date to a porno loving loser cuz nah like hes actually got so much depth going on in this situation like he cant#remember a single thing about his past he has no frame of reference for what a family is or if hes ever had one himself#which we then learn he. kinda didnt he was an orphan with no friends no name no one who came looking for him it seems#yet he still finds himself loving and caring for this girl and would literally die over and over for her to live a happy life#hes so genuinely kind and caring and deeply lonely and unsure of himself if hes doing this right#and he feels agonizing pain when hes forced to remember that he isnt mizukis real dad and that. he has nothing#but despite that he doesnt force mizuki to return these feelings because its a lot to burden a child with and shes been through enough#its like. kaname date i love youuuu please just adopt her already 🥺
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"Marchil? I guess I can see it on Chilchuck’s end, but what about Marcille’s? What makes you think she could develop feelings for him?" I’m glad you asked!
The first thing to note is that she does think highly of him
In the page on the right, literally defending his virtues and literally comparing him to Dalclan. And oh…
She does love a brooding mysterious guy who closes himself to love. But surely, Chilchuck isn’t her type at all, right? He’s not princely or knightly at all. In apperances certainly not, both looks wise and demeanor wise, but then that’s why she seeks to know him on a deeper level, to not only look shallowly.
And hmm. Chilchuck really is quite selfless isn’t he? Always looking out for others, and saving specifically her often, always making sure himself and, staying in or even running towards danger for her sometimes. Modesty is often considered heroic…
And can we talk about that drowning one… You can definitely frame the special attention as him knowing she tends to hesitate or be clumsy, and then his insistance on pulling her out of danger that she’s the healer aka the most important to keep alive, but. From the one who says that he just keeps his ass out of fights and won’t help this is a lot of risk to take, and he does die trying to pull her to safety in the dungeon rabbits chapter. And the drowning bit??? That’s when the dungeon collapses. The only reason they DON’T die of drowning here is that the water then gives way to outside. There was NO hope of pulling her to safety here and resurrections would likely not work either, he truly preferred to die with her than try to survive himself.
Sit your ass back DOWN you are in no state, self-sacrifical hero much damn
And Marcille definitely noticed this imo, after all she loves learning all she can about him, remembering things like how he hates waiting on people too. She pays attention to him and what he does and what he says. This to say that it’s notable, whatever reason for it you may think (though we know by this point at least she was already aware he was an adult though it wasn’t internalized), out of everyone it’s Chilchuck’s bed that she wants to sleep in during the Golden Kingdom stay. He’s safe and comforting to her: dependable, the defining trait in her view of him as is shown by the relationship chart in the Adventurer’s Bible.
^ Lending handkerchiefs is a romance trope btw and handkerchiefs have irl history of being used for courting. Especially in old English literature and plays like Shakespeare’s Othello, and personally I do see a lot of Shakespeare in Dalclan (nobility political drama with some romance). There’s how his cowl is a dearly beloved souvenir from his family too, there’s a lot of aesthetic tropes you can apply to him.
All this to say you can 100% romanticize Chilchuck into a princely noble guy if you try and that’s exactly what Marcille does with the wife roleplay. She doesn’t need much in the first place, she latches onto crumbs and makes aesthetic narratives out of details, give her an inch she’ll take a mile.
But what’s interesting about the shift throughout the arc of her and his relationship is that she starts out idealizing him into a little angel of a kid (shapeshifter), and she ends it idealizing him as a virtuous husband and family man instead.
And what’s doubly interesting is that in the former, she’s actively warping who he is personality and demeanor wise to fit the aesthetic, he doesn’t have that bitter pride of not asking for help and the edges have been smoothened. But what she does during the wife roleplay is something else, she acknowledges the flaws and just… Accepts them, rolls with them. She’s aware of his flaws and implements them into the narrative, but the reason why his wife left doesn’t capitalize on them even, rather Chil is chilblivious and his wife loves him very much still, she’s just testing him after having had a night of feeling out of place at his side.
And this is what separates the idealization vs romanticization, she’s not twisting him into someone else she’s just uplifting what he is and focusing on the good sides.
Marcille: "he has a shitty personality sometimes but if he was my husband I’d still cherish him" "If I were your wife I’d be overjoyed to go out with you and would get myself prettied up while you complain about me taking a long time, your friends would tell me that I’m nice and that’d make me happy, but I’d also be sad because you wouldn’t tell me that you love me enough"
He’s angry and his wife left him, he’s *flawed*, but he’s still worth hyping up, still worth having his own romance story, still has a shot of winning back his beloved. She sees him for what he is, human and real and not a carefully scripted character that fits an aesthetic, and she thinks it’s still worthy of love and admiration and fighting for
And what’s funny too is that you might expect her to cool down on him once she learns more about him but actually she only gets increasingly into his business. You tell her your age and next thing you know you promise to introduce her to your family. Give her an inch she takes a mile. And too the thing is, Senshi is equally mysterious but she doesn’t pester him like at all, asks him ONCE about his succubus and he doesn’t even answer and that’s like… It. With Chilchuck it starts off innocently enough with her wanting to know his age, hometown, the stuff she mentions having asked pre-canon. But it just keeps and keeps going and escalating. Think she’ll be satisfied now knowing you have a wife and kids, maybe she’s disillusioned now? Wrong! She wants to know their names and ages and occupations and hey how did you propose to your wife? Do you think she’ll stop after meeting them? What’s next? What will she want to know next????
She’s… Like it’s not a reach that Marcille is all over him. Like it doesn’t mean it’s romantic but she just is. She is not normal about him idk. Can you not ask him about what tongue technique he used when first kissing his wife, give the man breathing room
Marcille could literally go "if I was Chilchuck’s wife" having deeply pondered and thought out the hypothetical and people would still ask where anyone sees any romantic potential between them. Oh wait
There’s a platonic explanation for everything (almost?) in Dungeon Meshi don’t say I’m saying otherwise, but it’s definitely not like there’s nothing here to read into lol
Going off a bit more under read bc it’s my fave topic
Marcille has a whole theme with the charming prince trope with her idealization and storybook motif and Chil is kinda the "Well someone perfect like that isn’t very realistic and romance is usually more complex and that’s ok and good and flawed people can still be ✨virtuous✨" catalyst
Do you see do you see she starts canon thinking the most romantic thing is a prince charming but her arc in the end has her romanticizing an average, flawed, real and realistic family man, who’s on the poorer side and is on the verge of divorce. And that’s what he needed, too, seeing the positive of himself and the situation instead of focusing on the negative is explicitly what inspires him to hope that he might be able to reconcile with his wife, gives him the courage and self-esteem to shoot his shot.
He IS a prince figure instead that now it’s not about idealizing the grand and overt it’s about romanticizing the small things in real life!! About finding joy and beauty in things that seem normal or mundane and uplifting them to make the world feel kinder!!!!
He’s the devoted virtuous man that she wantsss not the storybook prince that’s unrealistic and could crumble like a script at any time. He’s the perfect example of a flawed realistic but virtuous & devoted & loving man. Far from a prince charming, but not fully detached from it either. Something worth fighting for despite the flawed cracks. Like literally, flawed romance being worth fighting for is literally the finale of Chilchuck and Marcille’s arc on the matter, where their separate arcs and issues intersect at the most crucial moment.
Marcille is important to Chil’s arc not only because of her optimism, but also because of her interest and knowledge in romance & matters of the heart, and that’s what he needs to both open his heart up to hope and to try to reconcile with his wife, like idk sounds gay
Their arc together is literally learning to 1) see each other for how they are and not undermining their qualities capacities etc etc while still not leaving flaws unchecked either and 2) opening up to people. Marcille LITERALLY makes Chil open his heart up to hope like idk man. What do you want from me. He’s literally the guy helping her through deconstructing novels and fantasy and rose tinted glasses and like. Deconstructing the prince charming figure into something more real but still romantically beautiful like KUI KUI STOOOOP STOP I’M ALREADY HOOKED I’M ALREADY-
Ok fine that’s me reading into the tropes too much forgive me for being storybook brained but like. Speaking his heart out to a lone woman on a balcony, Romeo and Juliette shit, asking if she, too, doesn’t want to meet his family, madly blushing. And like she’s learned with Chilchuck it’s all in the little things, all the implications he cannot speak aloud. She does reciprocate, does blush madly back, and the first thing she does is shower him in flowers and jewelry and what in her heart is coded as romantic gifts
A lady, stashed away in a high tower by her lonesome, waiting for someone to call out to her from below… Romeo courting type shit with an offer, a heartfelt spiel, implicit confession from underneath her balcony. Offering him flowers because he succeeded in calling out to her heart…….. And they have to climb to her too…. Crazy
Doesn’t it sound like a proposal. One that’s both so storybook-like and not, contrastedly real and grounded, all about the implications rather than in your face grand gestures, "Don’t you want to meet my family?". They literally have an arc about the topic of romance and this is the climax/pinnacle of it like god?? This is @ the woman who said "Chilchuck is a shy/bashful man so I know he wouldn’t tell me he loves me, but…" btw
To quote a friend, truly the shiny secret unlockable dating sim capture target : THE DUNGEON LORD BIT WAS SO FUNNY BECAUSE HE KNEW SHE'D TAKE IT HOOK LINE AND SINKER HES THE ONE WHO GOT HER TO TURN AROUND COMPLETELY SHES LIKE. WIDE EYED FLAG RAISED???? FLAG RAISED WITH CHILCHUCK 👀👀👀‼️👀👀‼️👀
And the way that this is the culmination of their arc together… Like people are not ready for the ‘Chil calling out to dunlord Marcille on the balcony has Romeo and Juliette romance novels imagery’ take. Or the ‘their arc is about growing to see beauty even in the non-idealized, in the flawed and in the real’ take which makes it so so perfect if she were to lower her ideal from a charming elven prince to a virtuous halfling man (which she does end up romanticizing)
So there, you got to witness in real time what happens when I think about marchil for longer than 2 minutes, there are so many layers it’s a deranged rabbithole. I saw the necronomicon of subtext and it’s driving me to madness with forbidden knowledge that no one else sees
……. Like what if I told you she implicitly picked Chilchuck over a "unrealistic prince charming who’s actually disingenuous" much earlier in the story already. If she was given the choice to think through going with a guy that seems perfect and chivalrous like her succubus she’d pick Chilchuck over the other actually. If I sound insane rn tune in for my full analysis on them coming this month hopefully thank youu. Interwoven arcs of fantasy vs reality and idealization vs pessimism I love youuu
So now you know the general thesis of my planned analysis about the importance of the prince charming figure in Marcille and Chilchuck’s arc, where she romanticizes things to a sometimes worrying degree or idealize people into something easy and digestible and poetic (like Chil being a kid, and then him being a virtuous ✨✨✨husband), and how she needs to value aesthetics less and actual acts and facts more, be more grounded (like seeing people for what they are flaws and all, and accepting that people need money and not pulling through on principles of honor or unity shouldn’t get Namari shamed) and a part of that is accepting that Chilchuck is BOTH flawed and virtuous, a loving husband that still has shitty moods and fumbled his marriage so bad etc etc. So it’s like, her image of perfect prince charming that will whisk you away on an ethereal romance -> realistic flawed middle aged dad with personality issues and a failing marriage but he still is worthy of love and having his cute grand romance story and his happy ending. Ik I keep repeating the same point through this but I need it to be burned into everyone’s brains it has its grip on me I can’t do this. They are so special……
#Someone did ask (on discord) btw i’m not just being a smartass though I do love being that too#This is stuff I cover in my upcoming marcille & chil arc analysis except here I can go full romo and don’t keep the strictly platonic angle#It’s at like 15k words rn I think. The 30 pics limit is killing me which is why I started asking my friend to do collages of panels for me#Sob#I keep alternating between it and the Falin analysis save me. Should be dropping soon idk i might test out having a beta reader for that on#Marchil foreplay is 2 years of being coworkers and slowly worming personal questions out of him until he blinks and she has#a key to his house#Dungeon meshi#marchil#marcille donato#chilchuck tims#like they’re so so funny look at this shit. Nonconsensual romanticizing of you as a person. Obsessive interest in your personal life#She’s latched so hard onto the “mystery” of him they’re deranged#MAYBE ITS ALL COMPROMISES MAYBE ITS ALL SWEET INBETWEENS <3#maybe we'll take our vision of what we thought we could be and make something new together. something for just us#Fumi rambles#Maaan Marcille’s ‘idealizing him into liking him even for all his flaws bc his personality is often kinda shitty’ arc’#and Chilchuck’s ‘prejudice against elves and mages and optimism into respect and trust’ arc are everything to me#Meta#Spoilers#Dungeon meshi manga spoilers#Tagged this so late oops#It’s so funny. She’s canonically wondered how Chil would be like as a lover#No no but like do u see. Fantasy is a key part of her chrcter and arc and he’s the foil to that he’s the thing that comes challenge it
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For reasons to be expanded upon at a later date (because I love the little bits about Boothill and possible paranoia/betrayal canon gives us so very dearly HNGH) I think Boothill like... He won't let himself fall into disrepair or anything of course, but he reeeeeeeeeeally does not like letting other people poke around at his body. It's a necessary evil to him. He does whatever maintenance and repairs he can himself. He started out with a massive knowledge deficit, simply because he didn't really have any exposure to that kind of technology until he left Aeragan-Epharshal, but he's taught himself a lot since then, he worked really hard at it!
Anyway, the point being, Boothill generally isn't super trusting of people.
But I think he would come to make an exception for Himeko, since he trusts Dan Heng a lot, and Himeko is one of Dan Heng's once-in-a-lifetime dearly beloved companions.
Himeko is so unflappable, I don't think she would even bat an eye about anything he throws at her, either. Like she enters the Parlor Car one morning (she's always the first one up) and Boothill is already there, waiting for her.
"Mornin', Madam Navigator."
"Good morning, Mr. Boothill."
And despite the fact that he blatantly broke into the Express (Pom-Pom is NOT happy about this JDKSAJDSKL), Boothill tips his hat, greets her politely, and is nothing but respectful when he says he has a favor to ask of her. Except it won't stay a favor long, of course- he has every intention of paying it back.
Himeko never agrees to things blindly, but she does bring up that all the knowledge Boothill contributed during the Charmony Festival was essential to preventing the universe from being pulled into Ena's Dream. And they were able to hold onto the Jade Abacus because Boothill used Tiernan's burial relic to summon the Galaxy Rangers instead. The Astral Express owes him a debt of gratitude, and besides, he's a friend of Dan Heng's. Of course she'll try to help him.
Boothill fidgets a bit, quickly brushes off the thanks, and tells Himeko he's having a problem with error codes. He keeps getting the same one, seemingly at random times, but the darn thing has no obvious cause. Dan Heng mentioned Himeko had been the one to rebuild the Astral Express. He knows it ain't the same, but it's not like he's askin' for any major repairs or nothin'. He was wonderin' if she could just take a look, maybe offer him some insight, since she seems to be somethin' of a mechanical wonder.
So Himeko walks him back to a another car, where she goes to tinker with machines without them crowding her bedroom. It's all neatly laid out and organized, and it only takes a second for Himeko to locate some specific device with a long cord. Instead of plugging it in herself, she holds the end of it out to him, like an offer rather than a demand, and Boothill visibly relaxes a bit. He still eyes it just a little warily for a second, but he accepts and plugs it into the port on his side.
Himeko pulls up the list of all recent errors, and they really are all the same. Boothill has had multiple temperature alarms over the past couple of weeks since the Charmony Festival, and they know it's not the environment, because Penacony is mostly dreamscape and kept mild year-round. The long-forgotten natural deserts are too far away.
Boothill is staring from the corner of his one good eye, so Himeko turns the hologram to let him see what she's doing easier. They don't appear to be false alarms. His internal temperature spikes and then slowly lowers again, high enough that if it lasted it would eventually cause damage.
One option is for her to start rooting through personal data, figuring out what he was doing at the time of each code, and tracing cause and correlation.
Instead, Himeko reads out the timestamps, and asks Boothill if he minds sharing what was happening around him when it occured.
Two weeks ago: He and Dan Heng went to explore Dreamflux Reef and found a bar- nice place, good atmosphere. Woman runnin’ it was a doll. Boothill left fer not even two minutes to get them drinks (Dan Heng knows like nothin’ about liquor, Madam Navigator, can you believe this guy) and when he came back, someone had already stolen his seat and was hittin’ on Dan Heng! Dan Heng didn't even care, just shooed ‘em off. Boothill laughed and said not to let him get in his way if he wanted to meet someone. Dan Heng looked at him like he'd grown a second head. Why would he want to leave with someone else, when he came here to be with Boothill?
Twelve days ago: While laying low- er, just rustlin’ up some grub- in the Moment of Blue, Boothill passed Dan Heng with March and Caelus playin’ on the beach, buildin’ sandcastles and the like. When he passed by again almost two hours later, they were still out there, with Dan Heng pullin’ March through the water on her inner tube and Caelus hangin’ off the back of it. He swam so fast! You'd think he was part water snake or somethin’. He looked happier ‘n a cat in a sunbeam… He has a nice smile, doesn't he?
Eleven days ago: Boothill was killin’ time in Dreamflux Reef when he turned the corner down a shady alley and saw Dan Heng, surrounded by three men demandin’ “protection money.” None of ‘em stood a chance, they were all on the ground before Boothill even blinked! So cool! Boothill wants to see that spear of his closeup- Anyway, Dan Heng stepped on one of ‘em on his way out, hahaha! Boothill stepped on the same guy a second time as he hurried to catch up.
Eight days ago: Here on the Express, actually. Boothill had mentioned bein’ curious about the archives, and Dan Heng personally invited him.
(“I remember that day, I saw you in the hall.” “Was there any problem with the heating that day?” “No, none. I don't think the temperature has anything to do with these error codes. I have a different theory, keep going.” “If ya say so.”)
Boothill was fascinated by an entry on aeons, and from a single question he asked about Lan, the two of ‘em ended up talkin’ fer hours. About aeons and Paths and Emanators, Acheron and Self-Annihilators, the Sea of Nihility, Tiernan, the Nameless and the Galaxy Rangers, their burial relics and their customs. Dan Heng finally just started writin’ and editin’ the entries in real time, with Boothill pointin’ things out and tellin’ him what to add in. They were at it so late that Boothill ended up sleepin' on a couch in one of the cars.
He'd figured there had to be something to make Dan Heng chatty- he'd caught just a glimpse of it that first night they met, sittin’ at the bar in the Reverie together. He'll have to ask about the archives more often, if it gets him all revved up like that.
One week ago: After that night of energetic discussion, Dan Heng was apparently hyped up, because after he'd downed some of Himeko's coffee (“You had some too, right? What did you think of it?” “It was great, even better'n chewin’ bullets!” "Thank you! That was my newest brew, I can't wait for everyone else to try it.") he actually asked Boothill to go hunting with him. Boothill asked who their target was, and was surprised when Dan Heng pulled out photos that looked like they were from March's camera, of all things, instead of a bounty or wanted poster.
And as he sat there, studying these pictures, Dan Heng explained that he wanted to hunt down these specific memory zone memes to record them into the archives. Planets with so much memoria are a rarity, especially with the Stellaron's activity thrown into the mix, which has surely affected the local “wildlife.” He might not get another opportunity like this for a long time. And Boothill had talked last night about his extensive expertise in tracking and hunting, so he should have plenty to offer here, Dan Heng would like to learn from his experience and see how he does things!
And oh, Madam Navigator, by the time Dan Heng was done speakin', his eyes were practically sparklin'! Just lit up like the sun! Boothill could scarcely believe it! The two of them couldn't even wait another day, they set out that very morning. It had been a long, long while since Boothill had tracked someone- er, somethin’- without the intent to capture or kill. It was…actually really nice. Nostalgic, but in a good way. It might even have been his favorite day on Penacony…so…far…
Boothill trails off as a couple of realizations crash into him. All the temperature alarms he's spoken about thus far- they've all happened in the company of Dan Heng. And now that he's thinking about it, he's pretty sure even the ones he hasn't yet talked about were with him, too. Dan Heng has been responsible for all of his error codes, every. single. one.
The screen in front of Himeko suddenly refreshes to the top of the list, displaying a new notification for the current time. Alert! Core temperature above normal range.
Himeko's knowing smile is sly as a snake.
Wwwwwelp, would ya look at the time, Boothill has some errands to meet, people to run, y’know how it is, he should really get goin'-
“Oh, Mr. Boothill? About that favor.” And Boothill jolts to a stop in the doorway because fudge, he can't just leave without hearing her out. He'd given his word. He has no problem running out on someone he thinks deserves it, but Himeko really had been kind to him to try and help him out. Her voice is just as knowing as her smile, Boothill can't turn around to look at her, or else he knows he won't be able to disguise the sound of his cooling fans kicking on.
“Don't make Dan Heng wait too long, ok~?”
“Y-Yes, ma'am.”
#honkai star rail#henghill#bootheng#Himeko KNOWS abort mission abort!!!#I really love Himeko sorta looking after Boothill the same way she does her crew even if he's not one of them haha. She's so sweet with-#-Dan Heng. She really seems to adore him and wants him to be safe and happy. I think she would be so happy he's found a new friend!#She wants to help this happen!! So get to it Boothill!!!#Was yapping about this fic to Ray and she nearly fucking oneshotted me: 'It's especially funny because we've got a Vidyadhara and a cyborg-#'-they literally have all the time in the world. SHE's the one who wants to be around to see it happen akfbbsbd''#AND JUST. GOD. Himeko knowing that she won't outlive Dan Heng. She's only human. She can't compare to a Vidyadhara lifespan. So she wants-#-to make sure Dan Heng has as many people as possible. She wants to know he'll be taken care of and not be lonely even after she's gone.#Himeko wants to see this important moment in his life happen she wants to be around for it *sobbing*#I'd been wanting to write this for a long time though because for me henghill is all about the little moments. like. they talked so much-#-back and forth in 2.2. they spent so much time together. they get along shockingly well. Dan Heng could have gone almost anywhere to wait-#-for the trailblazer to wake up after defeating Sunday. And instead of anywhere else Dan Heng returned right to Boothill's side. Was still-#-hanging out with him at the Reverie's bar. Still just chattering away. The point is that these two have a strong friendship to build a-#-romance on! They enjoy each other's company! They like spending time together! And I love that! I want to see their mundane nights!!#They'd have such fun dates uweh... They go on a coffee date and miss Himeko's coffee haha#(fun story Boothill's dialogue about Himeko's coffee was originally going to be 'it was uh...an experience. ain't nothin' else like it in-#-the world.' 'thank you!' But then I read Boothill's parlor car dialogue and? it turns out he LOVES Himeko's coffee? go figure ajfldjas)#(afaik he and Dan Heng are literally the only ones. how cute is that haha)#hsr#boothill#himeko#dan heng#hsr boothill#hsr himeko#hsr dan heng#my fics
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OC
#my characters#mmofail#HIS name is Beta Burst but he is played by a woman named Haley#and shes chill correcting people that hes a she irl but also just doesnt mind which pronouns people use online#irl though shes a she/her through and through#also she tells one of her employees at work (shes a manager at a convenience store) to get a hobby or find a fun online game#cause he always looks super tired and he tells her he doesnt wanna socialize out of work in person people are tiring#and then hes like hmmmm a hobby or game hmmm#and then he gets the same game and goes on the same server and lets his sister design his character#while he naps then he just picks a name and chooses ETA 1400 bc he works overnight and if he logs in#he plans to log in at like 2pm so why not make that his name#however there is a guild owner who wants to collect all the greek letters (her own name in game is Omega Rising)#so she makes the executive decision to include eta 1400 and when he and beta are talking one day in game#hes like oh yeah im just playing cause my boss at work told me i needed a hobby#and beta is like oh shit thats me im the boss who told him he needs a hobby#so eta starts calling beta boss in game just like he calls her irl#and its just a nice lil friendship and shes happy when eta starts to make friends in the guild#he still has a lost lil puppy like following vibe when hes around boss but eta does do some growing socially#mostly with betas friends in the guild which are: a guy with no backbone and a guy playing a girl who doesnt tell anyone shes a he#anyway thank you thats my oc essay tags and i love beta and shes just really funny to me#bc she just is there to vibe and play pvp#which the horn lore is those are high ranking pvp rewards for heavy blade users#and when eta finds out the pvp reward for a healer is a bloodied crown#hes like please please please help me learn pvp that sounds really cool ill do my best boss
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Ok guys, I'm officially CANCELLING the 'is lily a social climber' discourse. And I'm sorry but I don't think I'll reply to all the 'here's my opnion on why lily sucks' essays in my inbox haha, but I encourage you to write out your opinions on your blogs.
I think I've made my arguments on this topic pretty clear by now, a few times in fact. So I just don't want to have to repeat myself over and over. I don't think Lily is a social climber lol, and I think the 'evidence' for it in the text is flimsy at best and actively contradicted by a lot of the information we're given about Lily in canon. And (from what I've observed) a lot of this seems based on pretty silly and unfair assumptions about Lily. Like 'she was one of slughorn's favourites that means she's a social climber' is a huge reach imo, but anyway, pls continue to write 'Lily is a social climber' AUs if that's what you want.
My honest opinion is that none of this is based in canon though, unless you're jumping to the worst possible reading of everything Lily does. Which you can certainly do, I'm just not at all convinced.
I know I'm pretty open to discussion and disagreement on here. But I also do have my limits. Lily is a character I am very fond of, I think that's pretty obvious. For perspective, imagine your favourite character was Harry, and your inbox was just full of screeds about Harry being a homophobe because once he was rude to Dumbledore. Stupid example lol, but you get it. I don't think it's hate or maliciously done, but it is a little wearing. That's all.
#there is one ask i think i will reply to about this#the one about authorial intent. although it's only loosely about this#also someone said that lily looking at james instead of snape during swm was proof that she wasnt really a friend to him or something hahah#that's what i mean about silly assumptions. like.. idk maybe she was just looking at the person she was talking to but what do i know#she wasn't described as NOT looking at snape either it's so funny. even my girl's eyeball movements are hyper scrutinised lol#i think its worth thinking about why remus isnt called a social climber even though he also overlooked his friends' moral failings.#wanting acceptance/friendship/love is a normal thing and it doesnt make you a social climber lmfao. nor does being ambitious
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AWH... I'm skipping through Roier's QSMP Day 1 VOD because I'm looking for a specific thing, and I just noticed that when Jaiden stands in front of the group to do her introduction and her mic isn't working, Mariana laughs (not in a mean way, I laughed too) and Roier immediately smacks him and tells him off for laughing.
[Timestamp ~36m 50s, volume warning for Quackity's awful mic]
It's such a little thing, but I think it's really sweet in retrospect, especially considering how Roier and Jaiden have become such good friends in recent weeks :')
#i talk#qsmp talk#legitimately though I frickin adore Roier and Jaiden's friendship IT'S SO SWEET THEY'RE SUCH GOOD FRIENDS...#Jaiden was so nervous the first few days of QSMP and she talked about how she was too anxious to talk to people she didn't know#So this Egg event really helped her (and a lot of other people too)#It gave everyone a chance to make friends / bonds with people they might not have interacted with as much otherwise#it's just really sweet#I've got a special place in my heart for Jaiden I like her a lot#I used to watch her animations a bunch because my little cousin loves her#then I just kinda stopped because I don't watch Youtube creators much and my memory is awful#But QSMP made me start watching her again#and I found out all the stuff she's had to go through and I watched her videos where she talks about more serious stuff / her personal life#and like not to sound parasocial or whatever but my ''protective parental instinct'' went nuts after hearing all that#she's been through the wringer but it seems like she's doing a lot better#she's really funny and cool#but social anxiety is still a nightmare#I'm really glad she got Roier as her Egg partner -- he's so friendly and nice I think it really helped her relax a lot#and she's actually learning more Spanish despite saying she had 0 Spanish knowledge whatsoever when joining the server!!!#Idk man I'm just really proud of everything everyone's been doing on the server#and I'm really proud of Quackity for bringing people together like this. It's amazing#I love him so much and I'm so grateful this server exists.#First and Best Multilingual server baby!!!#Anyways I forgot how bad Quackity's mic sucked from literally everyone else's perspectives on Day 1 LMFAO#Roier specifically says ''Don't laugh!'' and ''Give [her] a pass!'' (for the mute issue)#alright I added a clip I can't not put a clip for this
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Day sixty-three | id in alt
A puppet and a witch.
#dailykugisaki#jjk#kugisaki nobara#mahito#jjk mahito#i Love havin to violently clarity who mahito is#ive never drawn this cursed bitch in ny life but making this thing do fucked up expressions is fun#update! ive been low-key concern looking at chapter 209-212 because......#dawg i think the merging is already Happening#AM I DELUSIONAL? DAWG IT MAY BE ALREADY HAPPENINH#WHAT THE FUCK DID THOSE BEAMS OF LIGHT MEAN??? UHHH??? UH?? ERM idk tho#i might be staring at the wrong shit but yknow#another update! its just the plans furthering lmao#though... i do think the merging should be able to at least start or something... it would be interesting to see#i fucking giggling tho bc in chapter... 244? i think the old guy with the katana says they could use cursed evergy to protect themselves#they completely disregard the people of japan and its FUNNY#but yknow who ACTUALLY has non sorcerer friends and cares for them insanely so? Kugisaki and fucking todo idk why not#i just wanna see what happens i wanna see how fucked up this is gonna be#also can maki fucking uh heavenly restriction herself out of the merger or is she fucked#im asking the REAL questions on my fucking daily Kugisaki account because this is the only way i can pick apart jjk with any kind of group
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yeah, man, i sure do.
#WHY IS THIS SO FUNNY TO ME#my friend giving me a glimpse as to what it feels like to non-aa fans listening to aa fans talk#i love how she asks as though they're obscure side characters. the series seems to think they are too <3#kicking biting beating the shit out of dual destinies and soj#klavier gavin#apollo justice#she gave the ok for me to post this without blacking out her name and pfp btw <3 in case anyone's uncomfortablw with me leaving it out#in the open#her @ is @pepsiiwho in case anyone wants to follow her <3
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we have gotta actually finish the other account, it has been months and we want to tell revi that we're also plural hgkjgk
#''why not just tell him about this account'' faucet says no even though revi is so nice and lovely hgkjg#also we get sad too much on this account we need to subject this to as few people as possible. (<- voice of a guy full of symptoms.)#but if we finally finish the account we can do all that yayy and also our simply pIural! did we say we finally transferred our pk info over#its so funny because if you look at our fronting history We Are All Fronting hgkjg#we don't have the time or even the ability to fully distinguish and compartmentalize different facets‚ especially in the timespan of our#front switches which is!! often!! :P (<- this sentence alone had like. five.) and much less would we be able to log them accurately#by the time we'd note whimsy's fronting it'd already be rationale taking over there is no winning i think hgkjg </3#anD IT MAKES US ANGRY THAT YOU GOTTA. CHOOSE SOMEONE THAT A MESSAGE IS FROM. WE DON'T KNOW EITHER!! WE ALL TALK TOGETHER!!#okay we're not that mad that's just hackles. it is like. annoying though. we just made a ''voli'' member for all of us to talk through.#it's also like. we gotta say that mom's fronting before we can mark a message as read. like. she's /not/ fronting she's taking care of lili#but we promise she got the message man. we can mark it as read on her behalf. we share a stream of consciousness with the lady my god.#it's probably really helpful to other plurals but for us it is not optimal. that site is Not built for us but we still wanted to make one#because other plural friends use it :P we probably won't be using it much honestly.#what were we talking about. right finishing the tumblr. but also we are like. we have so much to do? who has the time honestly..#god it would be easier if we could like. give each of us individual physical forms and multitask. problematic as well obviously since we#don't work well apart from each other but goddamn we could finally get more done at least? curse of being parts stuck in the same body.#okay we gotta go finish an art thing goobye!
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my new bff was told a secret by a girl we both know and she told her not to tell anyone and even mentioned me by name like she said not even marianne!!!! and i was told the secret the minute we were alone together this morning😭😭😭
#she's so fucking funny#true bffism. beautiful#her saying not even marianne = her acknowledging that she was likely going to want to tell me = her saying it's actually okay🙏#and THANK GOD SHE TOLD ME the secret is this girl has a crush on you know the guy we're kind of friends with but not actually friends with#that i have a friend crush on like we're friendly and we hang out but we're not FRIENDS friends. so like thank god i know this is so fun#and the girl who has a crush on him is like this girl who's actually friends with him like they're together a lot THEY'RE friends friends.#idk if he likes her back though i don't see any tension there but what do i know.#hm no i think i really do know. like he said something once about this girl and my bff and i were like HUH? i thought they were like bffs#it's so weird that he would say that about her. but what he said wasn't 'i'm very attracted to her and am in love with her'. it was odd#and like i say: brf slt
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UPDATE. HOLYYYY SHIT DUDE THAT INTERLUDE. AMY WAKE UP YOU FUCKED UP BIG TIME !!!!!!!!!! HELLO???? WHAT THE FUCK????? DUDE. AMY. OH GOD OH FUCK
I LOVE BONESAW SHES SO SCARY <3 how far did you get into the suckening btw. did you meet the weylin twins. I think bonesaw would be such good friends with the weylin twins.
hey also? what the fuck? bonesaw? bonesaw can we talk. i just want to talk. please. can I pick your brain. oh no. oh wait. aha. bad choice of words.
#TALKING IN THE TAGS. just because i think the bit of just the dallon-pelham torment nexus image here is funny. and also ive had it saved for#fucking forever its where the winters family torment nexus bit came from originally LMFAO.#anyway. ohh god.!!!!! sickos yes haha yes!!!!!!!!!!! everybody sucks here it's so miserable!!! surely this will have no devastating#consequences down the road :)))#i fucking LOVE bonesaw SO MUCH shes everything 2 meeeee. i love u bonesaw she is my favorite. i was half excited for u 2 get to this one bc#of the Amy Horror but also half bc bonesaw.... :]]] she is so good. I HAVEN'T MET THE WEYLIN TWINS YET but i know them#peripherally already + am lowkey obsessed w them from all ive gathered so far they would be SUCH good friends <33#anyway im sure bonesaw would love to pick your brain!!! ^___^ (this is not the last of her talking abt powers though dw)#anyway. AHGHGHGHHH. man. this is the start of like one of the Big Worm Things. amy is worm fandoms vriska!!!!!1#she isnt worms vriska narratively someone else is worms vriska. but she is so fandom vriska. ahaha.#holding ur hand!!!!!!!!!#mac tag!#wormposting
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me rn
#I HAD SUCH A NICE DAY#AND IT'S SNOWING TOO🥺😭#spent the whole day with my friend and her boyfriend bc he's visiting and it was literally so nice omg#maybe controversial opinion but i actually love being around people in love#and girl? i wish i had someone looking at me the way he does at my bestie#and not to jinx anything but he's such a nice guy you can easily tell he's a good person and cares about her a lot#the cuteness aggression i was getting for them... stop.#and i think it's also very nice that he wanted me to tag along for the whole day with them bc he wants to get to know people#who are important to her#so we took a walk around my city and went to a museum and for some food and idk it was just. so nice#AND i did all that in english🫡 and my spoken english got rustyyyy omg ;-;#i'm so so so happy for her <3#AND YOU KNOW WHAT'S FUNNY#apparently there's a specific mannerism that she got from me but didn't do it that much#but when they started dating HE GOT IT FROM HER AND DOES IT ALL. THE. TIME. APPARENTLY#so it's kind of like he got it from me even though today was the first time that we met properly lsjdhsjkdjcjf#anyway. i'm filled with so much love and joy rn AND it's snowing#the vibes are immaculate#agnes talking
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💡
#do y’all remember Nice Smile Guy????#I wanna set him up with my friend so bad#but I told my parents and my mom was like “plEAse that guy doesn’t want to get married” which like. how do you know that mom#did he tell you?? no you just assume that#and I’m not kidding they’re like perfect for each other#and I already asked her if she minds a younger guy and she said she doesn’t so#I just need to get them at a dinner party together#but aaaaagh#what if he really doesn’t want to get married#though I cannot lie I feel like even if he doesn’t he’d change his mind if he met her!!#she’s so pretty and funny and kind#and she loves to travel and so does he!!!#and I think they’re very similar in their goals and ideals#and he’s handsome and hardworking and has this very specific special gentleness about him#it would WORK I’m tELLing you#(and it’s not even a big age difference it’s like 3 to 6 years)#(I’m not sure about his exact age but he can’t be that much younger than her)#SO YEAG#not me shipping real people 😭#elly's posts
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Rereading Wicked is wild as an adult because the first time I read this book I was a ten year old child who had basically no historical context and practically no knowledge of sex and so I read it and enjoyed it but also didn’t understand anything — I hadn’t even seen the play or listened to the soundtrack at that point, I just loved the original Wizard of Oz book series so much and was really curious about Wicked, so I had basically no context for any of the sociopolitical commentary 😂 I was just there to get excited when obscure characters from the original books (but who were cut from the film) like Boq or Ozma were mentioned.
So now, rereading it and seeing all the things that went waaaaaaaay over my head as a kid is wild
#it is also reminding me though that i really enjoyed this book#probably more than the play - even though I ended up adoring the play once i saw it and becoming more obsessed with that than the book#even though i really had no clue what was happening half the time#i love the interpersonal relationships in the book#and the big friend group they have while they’re at shiz— like I love Elphaba and Boq’s relationship so much#the play really had to simplify a lot of the characters#and in the context of the play it really works#but i think i prefer the characters as they are in the book#like especially boq fiyero and nessa#and i like Elphaba’s sarcastic humor — she’s much more confident and funny and i love her little japes at everyone#and rediscovering that is really fun for me#because like - I remember all of this#i just became so obsessed with the play that the book became more distant in my mind#if that makes sense#wicked book
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having a lot of thoughts about eating disorders + how some of us end up developing chronic illnesses directly because of the physical effects of our eating disorders and how Cruel doctors can be about that and just trying to untangle so much shame and blame from that experience rn
#personal#vent#eating disorder tw#disability#idk. i don't quite have the words for this right now but#had another meeting with my doctor where they said yeah its your fault that you are now physically disabled for life#(literally i was chronically ill and physically disabled before i even developed an eating disorder because of CAH and comorbidities but#(they love to ignore that !)#which is like. i do not tie any morality to health and it should just be#a completely neutral statement. that my eating disorder caused other physical complications#they said i'm going to have orthostatic problems the rest of my life.#'since your gastroparesis was caused by your eating disorder that means there is no point in treating it'#which is so funny bc literally every time i see her my dietitan wants me to get a feeding tube! lmfao!!!!#i am actually doing pretty well in recovery in terms of meeting my energy needs through food. but i stopped being able to orally supplement#so my dietitan wants a tube for ARFID nutrient reasons. supplemental nutrition etc etc. and she thinks it will help gastroparesis symptoms#they also think i have osteoporosis and want to test me for that#when i had to use forearm crutches/ wheelchair because of physical ed complications doctors were SO fucking rude even though they were#the ones PRESCRIBING IT!!! like!!! you all are the ones telling me i HAVE to do this!#idk i also have a friend with permanent brain damage. from seizures in the refeeding process#and her doctors are so fucking rude to her all the time.#it makes me so mad
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