#I listened to the entire audiobook in one sitting

[sleepycyborgz]

Literally no one in epithet erased is neurotypical and I love it for that

[coffinflop]

this might be controversial idk but howl and sophie are the perfect enemies to lovers

[esthercore]

HSR Men and After Care ₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ₊˚⊹♡

Argenti is a yes, the jack of all trades, everything you can think of, cuddling, talking, cleaning, everything, always, prolonged after care, almost giving you a home spa and massage. Making you feel the luckiest price/princess in the world, yet so effortlessly.

Aventurine's likes cuddles, massaging you and words of affirmation, telling each other pretty things and kissing each other's scars. Staring into each other's eyes before falling asleep.

Blade just lays their and let you do whatever you want to with him, or just do anything you tell him to, really need to be taught tenderness, but will try his best for you.

Boothill will be the one needing some positive pep talk. The man's 95 percent body is metal, so he feels really insecure in his ability to pleasure you. Tell him he did good, and hold him if he tears up. Once he's feeling better again, he help clean up and massage the knots out of your back.

Caelus is so lovely. Oh please teach this sweet racoon puppy how treat you, and he put all his effort into it. He loves you so much and is so desperate for you. He put's the most effort in aftercare, as unlike Argenti who's actions come naturally, Caelus always try to go extra mile to make sure his lover his happy. Maybe even shamelessly ask Himeko for advice or better yet Kafka.

Dan Heng is really good. Coziness is his forte, so bunch of quality time with each other. Not much of a talker, but will listen to you as you lay in his arms, venting out anything and everything that's been bugging you recently, and then kiss your worries out your pretty mind.

Dan Feng (the actual high elder in past) will do the same, but will have tail rapped around your waist, as you two sit on the mat, your back resting on his bare chest, his robe lazily draped, barely hiding his mat, looking at the fountain out in your private courtyard, smoking from his pipe as your beautiful voice fills the room.

Dr Ratio is methodical. He has an algorithm like schedule he likes to follow, laying a towel below you as he prepares the bath, then carrying you princess style, cuddling you in the warm water. His rubber duckies floating around, as he lazily feeds you some grapes and your drink of choice he had prepared. Sometimes he likes to read you whatever stupid fiction book you're into at the moment, things he would never even open himself, but if it's for you, he happily read you the entire thing like an audiobook.

Gallagher is a simple man, he help you clean up, be there till you recover' and then have a smoke, and go about his day, unless you specifically ask him to d something, he don't see the point of doing it.

ForJiaoqui, well is it really a surprise, he will feed you first thing first after some rounds? He needs to ensure you have enough energy. Maybe you're still stuck on his knot, as he make you sit all pretty in his lap, as he feeds you the herbal porridge he had kept ready for his amazing mate.

With Jing Yuan it's cuddle central baby! Gonna plop your body in his, as if you're a plushie, clutch you tight and just fall asleep. Smack him awake if you want proper after care or pass out too, it's not like to you will have energy left after multiple rounds with him.

I believe Luocha will be the best with after care. Very tender, and gentle. The pretty man will be insistive for cuddling you, will clean you so good, make sure you are hydrated, fed and in top notch condition. Will flatter you so much and only be satisfied once you feel like a spoilt prince/princess.

Moze gives you no time for a breather pick you up like a sack and carries you the bathroom, help clean you up, and takes a shower as you yap whole soaking in warm water. Will cuddle after you two are fresh and clean.

Sampo is a meanie, he's the type to tease you even during after care. Calling you a nighty slut, and reminding you the way you acted so desperate and whiny during sex, as he scoop the cum out of your holes, or simply plug you up, if he feels like it. If you tear up he simply his your tears, and hug you tight. Will start calling you sweet names, and i love you's, when you're on the verge of falling asleep tho.

Sunday is well Sunday, he would have water prepared, maids already ordered to run you bath, and even some snacks for you. Even if it's compulsive office sex, he would always be prepared. Very determined while taking care of you. Likes worshipping your body, and trail you with kisses, telling you how perfect, and how pretty you are.

[susiephone]

wtf is dracula daily?

i’ve seen a couple people ask this question on my posts about it, so i thought i’d go ahead and clear it up here!

ok so, the classic horror novel “dracula” is an epistolary novel - that means it’s told via letters, diary entries, ship logs, and news articles. (technically the term “epistolary novel” refers to works told solely through letters or emails, but many have expanded it to mean any work that is told via in-universe documents, hence why diaries and logs often get included as well. “frankenstein” is another classic example; the whole framing device is robert walton is recounting the story he heard from victor to his sister via letter. a modern example would be “several people are typing,” which is told via slack messages, or “the perks of being a wallflower,” which is told via letters from charlie to his anonymous pen pal, which is functionally more like you’re reading his diary.)

because of the nature of the narrative, we actually know the exact day nearly everything in dracula happens - the letters, news articles, diary entries, etc. are all dated.

“dracula daily” is a substack project where the novel is broken up into parts, with people who are subscribed to the project getting emails every day something in dracula happens - for example, the novel opens with jonathan harker’s journal entry on may 3, so on may 3, subscribers are emailed that entry. the action of dracula takes place from may 3 - november 6, plus an epilogue set some years later. the project started in 2021 (i think), but fucking BLEW UP in 2022, and they’re doing it again this year! lots of us are very excited - especially people like me who fell behind last time.

why not just read the book?

valid! due to some parts of dracula being told out of chronological order, dracula daily does reorder some things. for example, the first section of dracula is told entirely from jonathan harker’s pov, then the second section switches the pov to mina murray. their sections have some overlap in the timeline, so dracula daily jumps back and forth between their perspectives.

if you want to read the book as bram stoker intended, dracula daily may not be for you. but for a lot of people (myself included!), it breaks up a very long text into easily digestible chunks (....mostly. there is one entry that is 10k words), and the fact that it’s a big project means there are a lot of people reading along with you.

i think there’s also something valuable about experience the slow revelation of wtf is going on along with the characters. the book which you might otherwise get through in a few days is stretched out into months of suspense and agony as you wait for the other shoe to drop, and it’s great.

plus, the whiplash between “jonathan harker’s neverending horror” vs “lucy is basically on the bachelorette” that you get in dracula daily is very very funny.

how do i sign up?

right here! and if you sign up and fall behind in the emails, no worries - the dracula daily website posts past entries so you can catch up.

what if i prefer audiobooks?

have i got great news for you!

like i mentioned before, i couldn’t keep up with the emails last year. part of it is that it is much easier for me to focus on an audiobook or keep up with a podcast than it is for me to sit down and read, especially with longer entries.

this year, there is going to be a podcast titled “re: dracula” that was inspired by dracula daily. every episode will be a dracula daily entry, with a full voice cast! (seriously, if you listen to british podcasts, you will recognize some of these names. the magnus archives and wooden overcoats girlies are WINNING.) you can find that here.

there is also a podcast called “cryptic canticles” that has an already-completed audiodrama of dracula that i’m told is also extremely good, and was also broken up by date. you can find that here.

why do i keep hearing about paprika/the boyfriend squad/lizard fashion/cowboys?

you’ll see.

oh god am i gonna hear about this nerd shit for the rest of the year

yes. sorry.

[deerspherestudios]

Ahem. I wanted to include a little drawing, but since the askbox is closing soon and I'm not done I'll send it later ;3

So the question is (it's only one now, I'll be more patient hehe) what is Alma's love language? (both giving and receiving (or how should you say that,,,))

Oh!! Another love language ask; let's gooo! I love doing these since it's so fun to flesh out the kind of ways a character cares for people and the way they'd like to be reciprocated! So here's:

•┈••♡❤ Alma's Love Language(s) ❤♡••┈•

When you're on the receiving end; Acts of Service 🫴💖

They can't do much for you considering their 'unliving' situation but they try their best to do what they can! Even if it's very limited sadly...

It starts small from reminding you to take breaks to going as far as helping you with your assignments when you're close to a deadline.

If you ever tell them you're planning for an all-nighter you can expect your usual spot on campus to already have coffee and your favorite snacks by the time you get there.

They're also happy to just accompany you the entire time; you wouldn't even need to talk since you'd be focusing on work but they're ready to offer assistance when you need it.

They're also quite protective; on the unfortunate chance you were getting harassed or bullied by classmates they put an end to that real quick with their uh, 'alternate form' if you will.

Just don't ask how the people that's been picking on you ended up in the hospital. <3

When they're on the receiving end; Quality Time ⌛💕

They've always been a loner when alive but they cherish the people they're close with whenever possible.

Having you as a friend just makes them more inclined to seek you around campus! They'd be overjoyed if you asked to hang out for something casual like watching a movie together.

They especially love long talks about nothing and everything; just the idea of getting to know you personally makes them happy since they haven't had a human connection in so long.

If you're a rambler, so are they! They're actually quite the nerd and would be happy to gush about various interests with you, even if it's things they're not into.

There's not many activities they can actively participate in with you, but the thought definitely counts! Maybe board games where you play for their turn, or listening to an audiobook together, or sitting somewhere having a quiet one-sided lunch; they're just happy to be there.

Overall just spare some time every once in a while for your ghost buddy and they'd be happy and content :-) <3

[corvid-language-library]

I see you talk about shadowing as a language learning method. I understand it had something to do with YT videos? Can you tell a bit more about that, how does it work and how did you come up with it?

Hi there!

Shadowing is where you listen to a language and simultaneously attempt to repeat what you hear - mimicking sounds and intonation - even if you don't understand it right away. By mimicking native speakers this way you acquire more native-like pronunciation while also (ideally) absorbing vocabulary and sentence patterns and grammar structures. I think this article explains it a lot better than I probably can!

The recommended way to do this is using audiobooks or podcasts with transcripts, but the reason I started doing this is because I would watch YT videos about useful phrases for daily life or videos about my target grammar, but I'd forget the sentences almost immediately and then have to find the motivation to sit down and rewatch an entire video, sometimes multiple times. "If only there were a way I could listen to the target sentences constantly and just practice parroting them back!" I found myself thinking. "It'd be so much more efficient than looking them up every single time or having to rewatch a whole 20-minute video!"

And then I realised I could literally just use Audacity (free audio recording/editing software!) and record from my laptop speakers myself.

So, I've been going on Youtube, watching various grammar videos and then recording sentences I want to learn from those videos. I record at natural speed first, then at 0.5x playback and then again at 0.75x playback. I then edit it together with two seconds between each recording and a repeat at each speed (plus one final repeat at normal speed). So an audio looks like:

1) Normal speed 2 second break 2) 50% speed 2 second break 3) 75% speed 2 second break 4) Normal speed 2 second break 5) 50% speed 2 second break 6) 75% speed 2 second break 7) Normal speed

Sometimes for shorter sentences, I don't bother to slow the audio down, so I'll just have it repeat 5-6 times at normal speed.

Once I've recorded everything and edited it together, I put the mp3 on my phone. I have a few different playlists (each one around 10-15 minutes in length) - some for specific grammar, some for specific situations (eg shopping, izakaya) - and I usually just stick one on repeat while I'm walking somewhere or doing some kind of menial task that doesn't otherwise engage my brain (doing dishes, ironing, making materials for work etc). And then I do my best to mimic what I'm hearing just behind the speaker (or along with the speaker). Usually the first few times I listen to a track I just try to speak along with the slower versions, or maybe just mimic the specific target structure. As I hear it more and more, eventually I can speak along with the audio word for word and focus more on my intonation.

I've found it helpful so far because it helps me learn sentences while building the muscle memory of how to say certain words/grammar. I can much more easily recall a sentence I've heard on repeat/practiced saying a hundred times than one I've heard in a video once and written down in a notebook somewhere. And if I can recall a sentence, I can substitute words using correct grammar rather than trying to figure out how to say something from scratch (and hopefully choose the correct option on the JLPT when the time comes!)

Hope that answers your question! Feel free to send more 😊

[stari-hun]

More No Storm but Vertin has a Time Traveling Arcanum Content

Inaccurately Named Modern AU

* Apeiron

I think with like knowledge and math becoming more accessible sooo many people in Apeiron would go to the outside world to share their knowledge because 77 (37s mom) showed that even the people most faithful to their school of thought are interested in calculation machines. Give them Mathway.com and people would lose their minds.

6 would be a professional gamer. In fact he’d take so well to modern society that he’d be one of those people thriving in the 2020 lockdown and being away from Apeiron. Afterwards he’d also recover fast and put daily walks into his schedule or something cause he knows how badly his physical would’ve gotten. 6 would have an Instagram that’s the weirdest thing ever. People use it as inspiration for arg characters because he unintentionally posts with the vibe of someone extremely inhuman, and even though with the internet most humans would be aware of nonhuman arcanist they’d still be like what… There’s several video essays breaking down theories on who or what he might be. On the other side his posts are all pictures of objects he sees on daily walks that he sees have interesting dimensions to them or placement in a scene. The issue is that he doesn’t give any preamble or context to his math like 210 who wants to share math with the world would, or 37 who genuinely wants to teach, he just drops it in the caption and closes the app. He’d also have a YouTube explaining how he wins matches with others and insane speedrun content and how he beats games in under three minutes in extremely stupid calculations and exploits. His uploads are once in a blue moon but he’s a really popular faceless YouTuber (unlike 37 he reads comments and thinks about the questions he gets a lot, and even answers them in other videos). Also his like daily wanderings until he wants to go back home and risk interaction with others.

37 would get ahold of the internet like fish to water. She’d be an early YouTuber on 6’s recommendation and get super popular without realizing it. Her upload schedule is a “think of something start recording it and post with little to no editing” kinda style that for her ends up being 6-12 videos per week. 37 probably wouldn’t even realize there’s a comment section but Sophia knows it. Sometimes she’ll relay the comments to her from fans if they’re questions or constructive, but she mostly keeps them for herself because she’s happy 37 is branching out even if she isn’t entirely meaning too. I think 37’s content is a personality type. She’s giving constructive lessons that are informative but her personality and voice made her gain an audience mostly there to listen to her as background noise while she does homework. She does have a very loyal core audience of economists and radiologists since the topic she circles back around to the most is patterns in the weather and how they can be applied to daily life. Her most viewed video would be a super complicated explanation on how to predict when the next storm will happen in your area, and the top comment is a link to a website where someone made it into a calculator (it works with like a 5% chance of error). Also fun fact Vertin tried to use it once and the website was down for a week after she tried it. Sophia would have more kids centered content. Her follower base would mostly be parents who sit their kids in front of an iPad during work, but heavily monitoring their internet use and want them to watch content that’s good for them. She’d be faceless but unintentionally blow up super hard for story reading content, and her process for making up original stories. Afterwards she’d take a huge social media break entirely, only helping 37 with hers before slowly going back to her usual audiobook content with locked comments.

On that note, it’s slightlyyyy canon based, but I also think 210 would become good friends with Sweetheart after the island opened up and he reached out to her through Pandora to be their liaison. They’d do a ton of promotions and fashion statements. 210 already has an established interest in beauty, arts, and how they tie to math, and Sweetheart as a person who’s mathematically perfect would be his best excuse to study arts. Then Sweetheart would enjoy the company of any asexual, especially if they’re good for her image, and 210 is genuinely there to vibe and enjoy the beauty of the world. I also feel like he’d have one of those instagrams where he’s super popular for his looks but vast majority of his posts are sky pics and pictures of flora he sees.

I think in the story Sweetheart and Pandora are already on pretty good terms but I think in a Modern!Twist AU Pandora would be even more active in her writing. I think she’d have a small but famous journalism company where she employs only those she deems have a fresh perspective in a way she can’t supply. I talk about it in my other post, but Marcus interns there after getting an associates degree journalism during her dual enrollment and finishing Highschool. 210 and her run top series in UTTU for numbers and art analysis in a way people hadn’t thought of before, and Marcus runs a deep dive on historical spaces and the hidden stories within them.

UTTU would sometimes have interview segments where guest slots of an employee’s choosing (approved of by Pandora) will get a special feature. Windsong is the most reoccurring interviewee alongside Vila for research papers in ley lines and ecosystem observations respectively. Both are very popular features every time due to how they provide perspective on Marcus’ and 210’s segments.

[false-cowboy]

Do you have any litrpg recs?

OH BOY DO I

I will attempt to give little descriptions but I'm not the best at writing so if nothing else I hope the names pique your interest! This post will be more personal opinion than direct plot summary, though if you'd like I can add those too

Noobtown: Humor is a bit high school boy especially in this first one, but it definitely gets some full body cackles outta me. Though this is a comedy series supposedly, it knows how to tug at your heart strings with some genuinely good characters and an interesting break of the system surrounding the book itself. More than anything, this shits Fun. It gets really interesting, Shart the demon is a pathetic mound of anger issues, Jim’s name is the equivalent of a dog’s in this world, all hail Badgalor king of the badgers, fuck the fecking puma forest.

Chaos Seeds: Classic of the genre, though definitely dated and the series degrades with the more recent books. Very nice magic system, one of the better uses I've seen, and the characters are notably very colorful/fun. Good fights and damn graphic, isn't afraid to be gruesome though there is a beating heart of humanity through the series I personally enjoy

Dungeon Crawler Carl (mix of LitRPG and apocalyptic dungeon elements, what it says on the tin): one of the best, and I mean BEST of this genre in my opinion. extraordinarily dark and horrifically funny. This shit will depress you as you giggle at it. But its just so damn good with some really nice underlying as well as overt commentary. More gorgeous character writing though here it's all Carl and the beautiful Princess Dount (his show winning, talking, cat whom deserves the universe in her paws) all the way. Very absurdist humor by the by, if that's your thing

Ascend Online (town builder litrpg): I mainly love this one for something that happens I think at the end of the first book though it might be the second. It sort of flips the magic system against our hero in a wonderfuly monstrous way. This one is Very Big, and honestly a little boring at times. But the game mechanics and magic system are drooling off of the page, begging to be thought about. Our main character is smart and resourceful, as a veteran of video games he capitalizes his knowlage for a satisfying build. If you’re really into game mechanics this shit was MADE for you, it is also just plain interesting. Good ideas and good fight scenes to go around for everyone! And mainly I just consider it a bit boring because I listened to the audiobook and the narrator read off the Entire Status Page ever like chapter which, if you're an avid LitRPG reader, you’ll understand the pain involved in such a thing

He Who Fights With Monsters: Another insanely long book, another absolute banger. While personally I'm not a fan of the series as it progresses, the first one is a full experience all on its own, lightning in a bottle to me. The main character is one of the best I’ve read about, the magic system is deliciously unique, the side characters are memorable as hell, but most of all I adore the worldbuilding in HWFWM SO fucking much. I have like full posts thirsting after it GOD. I could sit here and just talk. This is one of the best on the list to me, right up there with Dungeon Crawler Carl; even better in the side character department

Ritualist (The Completionist Chronicles): This one’s strengths are a surprising mix of absurdist comedy and a somewhat well thought out magic system. The writing is,,, Not The Best especially compared to some others, but it was a fun and very quick read, especially compared to some others on this list. a popcorn turn your brain off read

System Apocalypse (While most LitRPG exist in fantasy worlds, this one is a post-apocalyptic sci-fi vibe): This is another short one. It takes place in Canada and the main character is a ball of severe anger issues and angst, he has a very cool motorcycle and kicks hella ass. It’s great. His companion is top tier as well, there may or may not be a hot space elf prince involved. If you don't like romance you’re still good though because there isn’t any since John is a pussy ass bitch. Sorry, sorry, I'm trying to be fair and balanced. It's good! John is definitely a flawed individual, I think people often miss a lot of the little nuances in his character and write him off as petulant and pissed (to be fair, he is) but to me at least there's a bit more going on. Even if he can be genuinely irritating to read about

And finally, my two favorite series... and guilty pleasures

The Good Guys: A quintessential barbarian. Think of a barbarian character. Boom. There it is. That’s our man Montana Coggshall. this series is my version of embarrassment exposure therapy, Montana is constantly being humiliated and nothing good ever happens to him. But Also, this is not a sad or angsty or dark series at all. Its fun and light and god are the fights amazing. a fantasy romp to its core. Charming and delicious and fun and action packed to the gills.

The Bad Guys: A quintessential rouge. Think of a rogue character. Boom. There it is. That’s our man Clide Hatchett. This series has a style and comedy and charm to i cannot physically understate and there are So Many genuinely clever moments

there are so many characters that fuck around with morality and right/wrong and different view points that make the world feel so lived in

Everything from plumbing to lumberjacks is explored and given loving attention.

Reading it feels like coming home, I honestly don't care that the plot has turned into side quests and atm the side characters haven't gotten enough time in the spot light

The main character and fucking sheer amazing awkward kind conflicted energy of his dialogue, I've developed a connection to Eric ugland's style of writing further than I thought and I can't get enough of this shit. Also every problem Clide Hatchett has is solved with some sort of fucking batshit way I Adore

He's the guy who used a dagger that could travel through liquid to travel through a guys stomach and out the other side. Did I mention how gorey these books are? Because Yeah. I adore Clide Hatchet, my favorite character to ever be written in any place ever. He walks into places he absolutely shouldn't be, gets called elf boy, kicks everybody's ass while simultaneously being the most awkward and uncoordinated mess elvenly possible, then leaves. He is in the palace throne room profusely apologizing to the servants for getting dirt on the floor and beating the shit out of the king, he is at the altar of your wedding punching you in the face and then turning around and tripping on his dress, he is calling himself a hero before robbing a home blind. And also he keeps on shoving acid globs down people's throats and managing to do that while maintaining pure silly little guy energy is genuinely character writing talent. He's perfect. Yes it is very dorky.

Eric Ugland (who wrote both the Good Guys and Bad Guys series) has this way of writing, this STYLE I cannot properly articulate how much I find myself in love with it. though I will warn you I'm definitely bias, since I've been following both of these series almost since conception my perception could be entirely skewed by nostalgia

[bomberqueen17]

Liveblogging the Aubreyad: Post Captain Part Two

More book, less background, all spoilers.

I will here put in a plug for listening to the Simon Vance audiobooks of this series on 1.25x speed, can't recommend highly enough. Except his foreign accents are terrible, I won't lie about that. Anyhow. Get a library card and check these out if you would rather not read my summaries, which despite their thoroughness are not entire. The books are a challenging read but I did manage it at 12 but I did that through the power of being a socially isolated undiagnosed neurodivergent child so I don't necessarily recommend that either.

A NEE HOO, the book:

In part 1 we got female characters (sweet innocent Sophia? or her worldly, dashing cousin Diana?), sweet bachelor pad, social lives, horse farts, and *jazz hands* financial ruinnnnnn, and our intrepid heroes have fled to France where a Frenchman ruined Jack's composure by kissing him. But now, war has broken out, and they must flee without being arrested, which will be very difficult because Jack is approximately the most ostentatiously English person ever to have existed on this planet, in this universe.

And so now we pay off on my earlier bullet-point about Jack's fursona.

I had genuinely forgotten about this when I first relistened to the books. I listened to this long expounded-upon scenario, where a convoy of English prisoners of the French is resting and there's a man with a tame bear passing by and the prisoners, especially a sea officer trying to impress a lady in company with him, want him to make the bear dance even though it is hot and the bear is obviously tired, and the gendarmes finally come over and insist that the bear must dance to prove it really is a tame bear, and I was just expecting this to be some background descriptive passage included in the book for the atmosphere as so many are until, as they are finally left alone and the bear-leader is sitting counting up the coins people tossed at them, unaccountably reciting them to the bear as if the bear is going to care, the bear out of nowhere answers him.

“When one sea-officer is to be roasted, there is always another at hand to turn the spit,' said the bear. 'It is an old service proverb. I hope to God I have that fornicating young sod under my command one day. i'll make him dance a hornpipe - oh, such a hornpipe. Stephen, prop my jaws open a little more, will you? I think I shall die in five minutes if you don't. Could we not creep into a field and take it off?' 'No,' said Stephen. 'But I shall lead you to an inn as soon as the market has cleared, and lodge you in a cool damp cellar for the afternoon. I will also get you a collar, to enable you to breathe. We must reach Couiza by dawn.'

Stephen for his own inscrutable reasons names the bear Flora and tells everyone it is a female bear whose female troubles make it bad at dancing. Meanwhile Jack is being slowly murdered by the suit, his bare bloody feet glued to the costume's paws, insects eating him, never able to eat or drink enough, always overheated. By the time they make it to the Spanish border, Jack is nearly dead. It's a good character study: he is still thinking tactically at some times, still has the capacity to wonder whether Stephen might yet betray him, to notice that he has heretofore in their acquaintance underestimated Stephen severely, but his innate and natural response to this kind of hopeless privation and suffering is to simply submit to it and endure, doing whatever Stephen tells him to, understanding that there is no useful resistance he can make; he resents Stephen but also recognizes that Stephen too is suffering, this is simply what must be done and he must endure it, beyond any concept of limits. As they finally reach Spain he sits on a rock and dreamily tells Stephen he is glad Stephen seems so happy, and just sort of echoes whatever Stephen says, clearly well beyond comprehending what's going on anymore. (He does revive once the bear suit comes off.)

He spends some time very ill in Stephen's house just across the border. Stephen owns a castle there, though it's mostly in ruins. Once Jack can move, they make their way, this time both as humans, down to Gibraltar, and book passage home in an Indiaman* that has happened to put in there for repairs.

[* for the record the word Indiaman refers to a merchant ship plying the rich trade route to India, and would have female pronouns, like any ship. Actual human Indian men, if sailors or soldiers, are referred to as Lascars, with normal human pronouns as applicable, and as far as I can tell this is just a neutral descriptor and even though racial attitudes of the time were what they were, was not ever particularly used as a slur. Now You Know. Listen I'm trying to look things up as I go, since there's Period-Typical-Everything in here, but I might miss some, do be advised; I don't intend to condone any anythings in any of this nor do I wish to carelessly use loaded terms but it can be difficult to suss out what's what in the modern context.]

Aboard that Indiaman is another of my earlier bullet points: yes it's TOM PULLINGS. Jack recognizes him by his huge grin from across the ship, he's so delighted to see them, human sunbeam that he is.

Never confirmed as a lieutenant after the acting commission Jack had given him in the Sophie, quite without any political influence or hope of help in that quarter (though Jack had written letters of introduction for him to every single captain he knew who he thought might have a spot for him), TOM PULLINGS has given up on the Navy and taken a job with the East India Company, which pays better but is entirely without glory or hope of promotion.

“Why, sir, I could not get a ship and they would not confirm me in my rank. No white lapels for you, Pullings, old cock, they said. We got too many coves like you, by half." ''What a damned shame," cried Jack, who had seen Pullings in action and who knew that the Navy did not and indeed could not possibly have too many coves like him.

Another fun bit of fuzzy timekeeping which I should tally somewhere here is that while we know Jack and Stephen's adventure in France was of some considerable duration, every so often for the next few books Pullings will point out yet another Indiaman and say delightedly "I made two voyages in her", and I should start a running tally of How Many Indiamen Has Tom Pullings Been In somewhere because each voyage is a minimum of six months, and we have seen Pullings earlier in this book, he attended the St Vincent Battle Ball in February of-- whatever year that was. (Side note: Mowett mentions having served previously in the Namur, which was at the Battle of St Vincent, and it was only three years before, so it's perfectly possible he was there, but it's never brought up. Thinks to think upon!)

(I am sure some fan at some point has already done this work. But all the discussion boards are from 2003ish and it is hard to search them. Better than modern fandoms, where it all vanishes into private Discords, but it is... sort of sad, to look through the moribund message boards and remember being in spaces like that and how great they were. RIP to the golden days of the Internet.)

I've already explained how promotion works, so I don't need to elaborate on how very slim Pullings's career prospects are. He shows Jack all around his ship, and Jack tries very hard to be polite, but merchantmen, after the Navy, are a sort of sorry, squalid state of things, and there's not a lot to be polite about. Pullings clearly does the best he can but he has only a thin crew, a poor-sailing sluggish fat ship, and a timid captain to work with. What's worse, many of the crew are Lascars-- fine seamen, but they seem poorly; the initial assumption that they are simply not used to the cold proves wrong, it turns out that they're all succumbing to the flu, which is affecting the Europeans too but is hitting the Lascars that much harder. So the ship is now critically short-handed, with many of the crew incapacitated by the flu.

And then a French privateer heaves into sight, the Bellone. The captain doesn't know what to do and is terrified. Pullings beats the ship approximately into shape by sheer dint of competence and strong feeling, but there's not a lot of hope, he quite simply has very little to work with. Jack steps up and volunteers to take charge of one of the divisions of guns. It is so long since they have been used that he has to fire one to blow the port lid off, it having been painted into place long ago.

A brisk action ensues, but the Indiaman, despite all the heroics Jack and Pullings can manage, is overwhelmed and taken. Jack and Pullings are both moderately-to-severely injured in the fight, Jack left briefly in a coma after falling down a hatchway and Pullings being both shot and stabbed. The French steal everything aboard the ship including the passengers' personal property and Stephen's surgical implements that he was in the middle of using, impose a heavy prize-crew, and undertake to sail the Indiaman to a Spanish harbor. Jack will certainly spend the war a French prisoner, with no hope of getting home, getting a command, advancing his career, staying relevant.

But then an English brig, recognized as the Seagull by Pullings because his uncle used to be the sailing master in her, shows up and fights the French prize-crew to a standstill. Our heroes spend the action locked up below, but the French captain lets them out when the action grinds to a pause, the Seagull heavily damaged trying to repair itself enough to continue. Things look bad; the Frenchman is annoyed and might just sink the Seagull out of spite, but then a squadron of homeward-bound Royal Navy ships of the line round the headland-- the HMS Colossus, a 74, the Tonnant of eighty guns, more behind them-- and Jack puts his hand down over the touch-hole of the gun the Frenchman was about to fire at the Seagull and coldly tells him he must surrender to the brig.

Which he does.

So now Jack is home to England, and back in the running to get himself a ship so he can participate in this war and stay alive in his career-- but where he also is still at constant risk of being arrested for debt.

The new First Lord of the Admiralty is Lord Melville, whose family name is Dundas-- the older brother, in fact, of Heneage Dundas, who was a midshipman and then a lieutenant alongside Jack, one of his best friends. Melville thinks his younger brother is a bit of an idiot, but has some small fondness for Jack anyway. So there's hope. But Jack is arriving so late that all the best posts have already been snapped up. Melville promises to do his best to find him something, but tells him not to hold out much hope of something actually good. Jack does explain his specific problem, however-- the debt thing-- and Melville is understanding of it at least.

Jack has taken lodgings in a tiny shack outside of town with Stephen, giving rise to this charming description, please to look out for a particularly excellent 19th-century word usage:

At present they were lodging in an idyllic cottage near the heath with green shutters and a honeysuckle over the door - idyllic in summer, that is to say. They were looking after themselves, living with rigid economy; and there was no greater proof of their friendship than the way their harmony withstood their very grave differences in domestic behaviour. In Jack's opinion Stephen was little better than a slut: his papers, odd bits of dry, garlic'd bread, his razors and small-clothes lay on and about his private table in a miserable squalor; and from the appearance of the grizzled wig that was now acting as a tea-cosy for his milk-saucepan, it was clear that he had breakfasted on marmalade.

Stephen you slut indeed.

They go to a party-- a risky proposition, with Jack a wanted man, but Everyone who is Everyone will be there, and he quite simply needs to remind his various powerful acquaintances that he is here and in need. So they go. Diana is there, and also a well-connected, very wealthy merchant named Canning. Canning's merchant ships are very much preyed-upon by privateers-- especially the Bellone-- and he has been commissioning privateers of his own to defend them. He very politely, indirectly goes as far as is decent toward offering Jack the command of the latest of these, which is to be very large and powerful indeed. It is deeply, deeply tempting, and Jack considers it at length, but his ambition above all else lies with the Navy, and Lord Melville is also at the party and tells him he should come the very next day to a meeting, Melville thinks he might have something for him.

Diana also offers to Jack that he might come see her the next day. He points out, sensibly, that he is at risk of arrest, and so it would be deeply irresponsible of him to go jaunting about the city. She scorns him for this, saying he is being a coward to even consider such things as his own personal ruin. She quite openly only wants him if he's willing to ruin himself for her.

Jack goes out for a walk late that night, out in a deserted area, to think. A man tries to mug him and his immediate reflex, honed by kind of a lot of hand-to-hand combat experience, is to just absolutely beat the shit out of the guy in about two blows. He lays him out cold and then, standing over the body, realizes he can't leave the man lying here as it's coming on to freeze and the fellow will die of exposure. So, cursing how complicated everything always has to be on land, he carries the man home, as you do, and ties him to a chair, and promptly falls asleep in the other chair waiting for Stephen, who went to visit other friends after the party.

(Several times in the series it is made plain that Jack has been at sea since he was an actual child, and his understanding of how laws work by land is very extremely fuzzy at best; his education in general is shockingly lacking. He knows the Articles of War cold, could recite them back to front, can cite them by number unfailingly, but only has a vague notion of any other kind of law, and no idea at all how the land-based justice system actually works. And how could he?)

Stephen comes home near dawn to find them thus, Jack asleep in one chair, and the would-be mugger wide awake, terrified, and extremely-competently tied to their only other chair.

The would-be mugger is an excellent plot device: he succinctly and intelligently explains to Stephen and the reader exactly how English debt law works, he himself being extremely experienced in it. (Stephen is gently spooning food into the man's mouth even as he is still tied to the chair, he having admitted he only took up trying to mug people because he had not eaten in several days.) Jack also forces the man to eat some of Jack's own breakfast, under peril of being headed up in a cask and tossed overboard, which makes plain to everyone involved a) how serious he is and b) where he's more normally accustomed to being.

Jack makes his way to the meeting with Melville, who finally offers him a ship. It is not a good ship. Melville actually feels guilty to even offer it. It is called HMS Polychrest, it is a misguided experiment gone wrong, built by a corrupt dockyard to the specifications of an ill-informed landlubber with ideas. But, it has cannons and it technically floats, so Jack takes it.

He's aware that Melville feels like shit about it, though, so he figures he has one, and only one, big concession he can ask for. And he shoots that shot on one, very dear, very precious thing that he very badly wants:

TOM PULLINGS, to be made lieutenant at last, and to serve with him in this misbegotten floating disaster.

I will break off again here because this is too long. Stay tuned for PART THREE, in which I promise I'll tell you how Barret Bonden punches out a cop.

[spiderliliez]

MORFYDD CLARK and ADHD

ADHD Awareness Month October 2024

The GIFs above are excerpts from Morfydd’s five different interviews during the promotion of “Saint Maud” while still filming “The Rings of Power” where she briefly talks about, and inadvertently exhibits her ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) traits. The first one shows of her being surprised by her alarm, and explains she keeps it on snooze so she doesn’t forget her tasks. Some would think this is just normal, that we all really need to have reminders anyway. But when you have ADHD, your alarms will be your lifesaver, and it can be quite extreme as your attention easily wanders off and you have almost no control of it, because you simply completely forget what you’re supposed to do. 😖

In the second interview, the keyword is “Procrastination” and she mentions how procrastination doesn’t make her feel guilty. Constant procrastination is very common amongst people with ADHD. It’s just always there. Yes, we all procrastinate, but people with ADHD does it more extreme than others. There are those who would feel endless guilt when they dither and temporize what needs to be done, and after all that, they still couldn’t keep themselves from procrastinating anyway. It becomes this vicious cycle, that adds on to one’s depression because of feeling incompetent. I’m just glad she’s allowed herself to indulge in what she wants to do and not feel criminal about it. 🙃 In the third one, she talks about her struggle with reading and being unable to keep at it for a certain duration. This is very common with ADHD as your ability to focus shifts so quickly, especially if you happen to be reading something you realized you’re not that interested in. However as she mentioned, she was able to read through the entire script (for “Saint Maud”) in one go, of which shows how much she loved the story. In some of her interviews, she speaks of how audiobooks have been very helpful to her. People with ADHD can also have “Dyslexia” (just like Morfydd). It’s more common than not, and that makes reading and writing even more challenging.

In her fourth and fifth interview, she talks about how her brain reacts while she was in school. It’s quite clear, listening and reading her interviews, that she has the combination of both the “Hyperactive-Impulsive and Inattentive Type”. As you know, there are three types (Hyperactive-Impulsive, Inattentive, and having both). Being in class, with so much stimuli, with her brain firing different thoughts and ideas almost all at once, as Morfydd exclaimed, “So exciting!”, while the teacher talks about a subject that she probably doesn’t find interesting, plus that insatiable need to get on her feet to be where she wants to be, or do what she wants to do. And all of that... you can imagine, it just becomes quite taxing for an excited ADHD brain. 🧠 I get that, really. The most common type of ADHD in girls is the “Inattentive Type” (formerly just called “ADD” aka Attention Deficit Disorder), which is easily overlooked. I was only diagnosed with it as an adult, which makes it sad as I’ve always been so cruel to myself before, not knowing what was wrong with me, and admitted to myself that I was just simply “lacking” or worst, feeling “dumb”. It’s a terrible (false) acceptance for a kid, and I carried that thought until adulthood. Morfydd got her diagnosis when she was seven. She was probably quite a handful! 😅 Parents and teachers can easily spot the “Hyperactive” kids because, well, they are literally hyperactive and uncontrollably rambunctious. Because of that, they can get their diagnosis earlier in life and get the help they require in their formative years. I was not like that. I was quiet, and timid. I was even called the “most behaved in class”. I didn’t cause any trouble in school. However, my concentration level is next to zero at worst times. I might be sitting quietly, but my mind is just all over the place. I’ve learned earlier in life on how to pretend I’m okay and find ways to cope.

🗨️ MORFYDD SAID:  I knew I was different from age seven when I started having medication for it. I understood that something was different but I didn’t understand what it was. I’d go and get my tablet in the staff room at lunchtime and there was a boy a few years above me who had an illness that required lots of medication, but I didn’t know this at the time. I remember seeing him get lots of tablets, cause that’s what he needed, and being like “Wow. He must be really naughty because I am quite naughty and I get one tablet.” I think quite early on, you label yourself as naughty and bad. (via ContentMode)

My ADHD caused me to have insomnia as early as age eight or nine. My brain just never stops wandering, even when I am physically tired. When I do things, I finish my tasks a lot longer than most people, be it at school, at home, or at work. This is not something I’ve talked about before, because I feel as an adult, in the usual corporate profession, I feel I’d be marginalized for it. It’s not really something I want my colleagues, and my boss to know. What’s more, for ADHD people, other learning disabilities are quite common. In school I enjoyed writing essays and stories, however, I suffered from mild “Dyslexia” and when I started second grade I started to have terrible “Dyscalculia” that I still have to this day.

🗨️ MORFYDD SAID: My dyslexia means I can’t read for long periods or the letters start moving around on the page, giving me headaches, so I have to prep more than others in shorter bursts — and when I’m home I’ve got these orange tinted glasses that I have to wear. (via WalesOnline)

My dyslexia has progressively gotten better as I have gotten older, and I even joined spelling bees in school. But the amount of hard work I did for that was just a lot. When I joined my local school paper, I decided it’s better I just focus on “editorial cartooning” instead of writing features and news because I have trouble submitting my articles on time. My dyscalculia until now is the same. I took up “Bachelor of Computer Science”, and you could call it a miracle, but I did manage to graduate. During exams, I always leave the room last, as I have to recheck my answers again and again before I submit them. Same with writing emails at work. And when I have to read a book, I oftentimes find myself stuck on one page over and over again. I’d be reading the same lines, but my mind just flies off, so I have to either stop, or restart reading until I could concentrate. The distraction can be caused by my own thoughts, or because I’m distracted by my surroundings. It’s really hard to focus, and I think Morfydd is amazing for being able to remember her lines especially when she’s doing onstage plays.

🗨️ MORFYDD SAID: I feel that acting really suits me because sometimes I struggle with a whole day rehearsal in a play, but film is very short moments of intense concentration. Then you can snap out of it. Also, the stakes are high. If I was going to have to do something boring like writing an essay, I can only do it under huge amounts of pressure and adrenaline. Being on set you have short bursts with pressure and it’s fun. In terms of learning lines, I will just wander around my flat or town saying them. There is no structure. I struggle when there is a structure enforced on me, that I can’t do. Within film, I am allowed to be fluid and structured within this world. I thought about that a lot with Maud. Because I thought, “Would I have been bullied a lot if I had been in an office, because I would just be annoying? Would I be fired a lot for being late?” (via ContentMode)

One of the remarkable aspects of ADHD is the ability to “Hyperfocus”. This so called superpower allows you to become intensely absorbed in a task, especially when it’s something you’re passionate about. For instance, Morfydd mentioned that when she first read the script for “Saint Maud”, she was so engrossed that she finished it in one sitting. In this state, nothing can distract you—absolutely nothing! When I hyperfocus, I often lose track of time and my surroundings, completely unaware of people trying to get my attention. I imagine it’s the same for Morfydd when she’s acting.

If you have ADHD and aim to meet expectations—whether it’s graduating from school or university, maintaining a relationship, running a business, or keeping your job—your brain really has to work extra hard to compensate for lack of focus and distractibility. In short an ADHD brain tends to be a lot more fatigued, and stressed than your neurotypical brain. It can become more manageable by taking your prescribed medication, managing your time effectively, and setting up reminders. Recent studies offer helpful coping strategies, and support from friends and family is very important, too!

🗨️ MORFYDD SAID:  People with ADHD find it really hard to put effort into things that they don’t find interesting. So, it’s about finding the thing that your child or person with ADHD is passionate about and finding a way to make that part of your world.” (via ContentMode) It’s weird to have a diagnosis from seven. It makes you feel different or other, which feeds a fascination with brains and why people are the way they are. I’m kind to myself about stuff I find difficult, because I understand why. (via NZHerald)

There are many people, especially girls and women who struggle with this neurodevelopmental disorder and not know they actually have it. So, I do have a lot of love, respect and appreciation for Miv, especially that she talks about this publicly, and reminding others that, ��it’s okay’. With that, I have been reminded to be kinder to myself. I was never okay with having ADHD, but when people like her talk about it, I feel not so alone anymore. 🥀

Thanks to:  Morfydd Clark, ContentMode, NZHerald, The Observer, The Upcoming, BFI, Harper's Bazaar UK, Carl Marsh, BAFTA, WalesOnline, ADDITUDE

[pippin-katz]

I need a cast audiobook of RWRB. If no one else, then at least Taylor and Nick reading Alex and Henry. I need it in my life.

And in ACD fashion, here’s a few lists of lines/conversations from the book that I am desperate to hear them say. I want to hear them read all of the lines, but these are the ones that pop out to me!

Post Writing Note: These turned out to be way longer than I thought they were going to be 😭😂

Alex Lines:

Oh yeah, that was a wild night. Two whole keynote speakers. Nothing sexier than shrimp cocktails and an hour and a half of speeches on carbon emissions. - page 5

'Archnemesis' implies he's actually a rival to me on any level and not, you know, a stuck-up product of inbreeding who probably jerks off to photos of himself. - page 7

Jesus Christ, it’s like they can see into your soul. Cornbread knows my sins, Henry. Cornbread knows what I have done, and he is here to make me atone. - page 77

I always thought you’d kill me in a more personal way. Silk pillow over my face, slow and gentle suffocation. Just you and me. Sensual. - page 80

Shut up, shut all the way up, oh my God. - page 131

For fuck's sake, man, you just had my dick in your mouth, you can kiss me good-night. - page 145

What in the rich-white-people-sex-dungeon hell? - page 149

Bisexuality is truly a rich and complex tapestry. - page 194

Listen: I'll fly to London right now and pull you out of whatever pointless meeting you're in and make you admit how much you love it when I call you "baby". I'll take you apart with my teeth, sweetheart. - page 204

You don't get to sit up here and pretend like it's someone else's problem. None of us do. - page 209

i want to see a cage match between your grandmother and this fucking ghoul running against my mom. - page 221

I do think I got a gut feeling with you, I just didn't have what I needed in my head to understand it. But I kind of kept chasing it anyway, like I was just going blindly in a certain direction and hoping for the best. I guess that makes you the North Star? - page 244

Henry! Your Royal fucking Highness! - page 269

Really nice. Fuckin' ghost me for a week, make me stand in the rain like a brown John Cusack, and now you won't even talk to me. I'm really just having a great time here. I can see why y'all had to marry your fucking cousins. - page 270

I fucking love you, okay? Fuck, I swear. You don't make it fucking easy. But I'm in love with you. - page 271

I'll leave, as soon as you tell me to leave. - page 275

Okay, I'm into making history. - page 280

I completely fucking love you. - page 291

I'm there for whatever you decide you want to do, just, like, let me know if I need to start practicing gazing wistfully out the window, waiting for my love to return from the war. - page 296

AN INCOMPLETE LIST: THINGS I LOVE ABOUT HRH PRINCE HENRY OF WALES Note: just the entire list, I need it, but I'll point out some of the best ones anyway lol

9. How hard you try. 10. How hard you've always tried. 11. How determined you are to keep trying. - page 303

16. Your huge, generous, ridiculous, indestructible heart. 17. Your equally huge dick. 18. The face you just made when you read that last one. - page 303

20. The fact that you loved me all along. - page 303

God, I want to fight everyone who's ever hurt you, but it was me too, wasn't it? All that time. I'm so sorry. - page 303

Listen, I'm telling you right now, I will physically fight your grandmother myself if I have to, okay? And, like, she's old. I know I can take her. - page 312

You and me and history, remember? We're just gonna fucking fight. Because you're it, okay? I'm never gonna love anybody in the world like I love you. - page 312

Sería una mentira, porque no sería él. (It would be a lie, because it wouldn't be him.) - page 317

but i've kissed your mouth, that corner, that place it goes, so many times now. i've memorized it. topography on the map of you, a world i'm still charting. i know it. i added it to the key. here: inches to miles. i can multiply it out, read your latitude and longitude. recite your coordinates like la rosaria. - page 319

give yourself away sometimes, sweetheart. there's so much of you. - page 320

Zahra, you're my mean friend. - page 339

I've never... I haven't been through anything like that. But I've always felt it, in him. There's this side of him that's... unknowable. But the thing is, jumping off cliffs is kinda my thing. That's the choice. I love him, with all that, because of all that. On purpose. I love him on purpose. - page 344

For what it's worth, that is the bravest son of a bitch I've ever met. - page 347

My life is a cosmic joke and you're not a real person. - page 371

You are, the absolute worst idea I've ever had. - page 372

FIRST SON ALEXANDER CLAREMONT-DIAZ'S ADDRESS FROM THE WHITE HOUSE, OCTOBER 2, 2020 - pages 372-375 Note: just, the entire speech, the whole thing

America: He is my choice. - page 374

Henry Lines:

Hmm, I always liked Luke. He's brave and good, and he's the strongest Jedi of them all. I think Luke is proof that it doesn't matter where you come from or who your family is--you can always be great if you're true to yourself. - page 45

The turkeys are not going to Jurassic Park you. You’re not the bloke from Seinfeld. You’re Jeff Goldblum. Go to sleep. - page 82

You are the thistle in the tender and sensitive arse crack of my life. - page 73

fucking eyelashes - page 142

I shall just have to make it the best orgasm of your life. What can I do to make it good for you? Talk about American tax reform during the act? Have you got talking points? - page 196

How is a man to get anything done knowing Alex Claremont-Diaz is out there on the loose? - pages 202-203

They wanted something less fruity than the truth, but truly, what is gayer than a woman who languishes away in a crumbling mansion wearing her wedding gown every day of her life, for the drama? - page 205

Someone else's choice doesn't change who you are. - page 229

Most things are awful most of the time, but you're good. - page 230

The phrase "see attached bibliography" is the single sexiest thing you have ever written to me. - page 241

Should I tell you that when we're apart, your body comes back to me in dreams? That when I sleep, I see you, the dip of your waist, the freckle above your hip, and when I wake up in the morning, it feels like I've been with you, the phantom touch of your hand on the back of my neck fresh and not imagined? That I can feel your skin against mine, and it makes every bone in my body ache? That, for a few moments, I can hold my breath and be back there with you, in a dream, in a thousand rooms, nowhere at all? - page 242 Note: based on the parts of this we did get to hear Nick say in the film, I think this would kill half the fandom lol

When have I ever, since the first instant I touched you, pretended to be anything less than in love with you? - page 272

I never thought I'd be stood here faced with a choice I can't make, because I never... I never imagined you would love me back. - page 273

The Mail will write mad speculations about where I've gone, if I've offed myself or vanished to St. Kilda, but only you and I will know that I'm just sprawled in your bed, reading books and feeding myself profiteroles and making love to you endlessly until we both expire in a haze of chocolate sauce. It's how I'd want to go. - page 294

Here lies Prince Henry of Wales. He died as he lived: avoiding plans and sucking cock. - page 298

"Because I'm not like the rest of the men of this family, beginning with the fact that I am very deeply gay, Philip." - page 298

But the first time I saw you. Rio. I took that down to the gardens. I pressed it into the leaves of a silver maple and recited it to the Waterloo Vase. It didn't fit in any rooms. - page 300

I thought, this is the most incredible thing I have ever seen, and I had better keep it a safe distance away from me. I though, if someone like that ever loved me, it would set me on fire. - page 300

And then, inexplicably, you had the absolute audacity to love me back. - page 300 Note: I really wanted to just type out most of the page, but I restrained myself lmfao

I don't know if I would have chosen it yet, but it's out there now, and... I won't lie. Not about this. Not about you. - page 338

Bit short for a stormtrooper. - page 340

I've bloody well had it. I've sat about long enough letting you and Gran and the weight of the damned world keep me pinned, and I'm finished. I don't care. You can take your legacy and your decorum and you can shove it up your fucking arse, Philip. I'm done. - page 347

I've been as gay as a maypole since the day I came out of Mum, Philip. - page 353 Note: there's never too many times to hear the words "gay as a maypole" and the emotional infliction here is lot different lol

Both:

Am I offending you? Sorry I'm not obsessed with you like everyone else. I know that must be confusing for you. Do you know what? I think you are. Only a thought. Have you ever noticed I have never once approached you and have been exhaustingly civil every time we've spoken? Yet here you are, seeking me out again. Simply an observation. - page 18

This is idiotic. Let's get it over with. I'd rather be waterboarded. Your country could probably arrange that. Go fuck yourself. Hardly enough time. - pages 36-37 Note: yes, I know Nick read this part in his book-to-screen video thingy but it's not the same as having them both saying the lines fully in character.

What does Jedi have? Fuckin' Ewoks. Ewoks are iconic. Ewoks are stupid. - page 52

yo there's a bond marathon on and did you know your dad was a total babe I BEG YOU TO NOT - page 84

I'm going to die. I'm going to kill you. Yes, you are. - page 133

You were jealous. You want me. Yes, you preening arse, I've wanted you long enough that I won't have you tease me for another fucking second. - page 137

Hi. Hello. I'm gonna take your pants off now. Yes, good, carry on. - page 141

Ugh, you look ridiculous. Should I-- What? No, of course not, keep them on. Oh my God, what are you doing? I can't even look at you. No, Jesus, I just mean--I'm so mad at you. Just, come here. Fuck. I'm quite confused. Me fucking too. - page 150

I'm not... historically great at talking about things. Well, I wasn't historically great at blowjobs, but we all gotta learn and grow, sweetheart. - page 165

Bitch, you took me there. alskdjfadslfjad NORA YOU BROKE HIM - page 212

D'you know what I want? What? I want, to do the absolute last thing I'm supposed to be doing right now. Then tell me to do it, sweetheart. Fuck me. Well, when at Wimbledon. Just so we're clear, I'm about to have sex with you in this storage closet to spite your family. Like, that's what's happening? Right. Awesome, fucking' love doing things out of spite. - page 217 Note: I think this conversation could singlehandedly kill the fandom if we got to hear Taylor and Nick deliver these lines

Can't you ever just do one thing without having to be so goddamn extra about it? That is bloody rich coming from you. - pages 260-261

What do you want? I want you- Then fucking have me. -but I don't want this. - page 273

You seem... less pissy. You're one to talk. I wasn't the one who stormed the palace in a fit to call me an 'obtuse fucking asshole'. In my defense, you were an obtuse fucking asshole. - page 277

I honestly have never thought I deserved to choose. But you treat me like I do. You do. I think I'm actually starting to believe that. - page 279

What about you? What about me? Christ, Alex. The whole bloody time. The whole time? Since the Olympics. The Olympics? But that's, that's like- Yes, Alex, the day we met, nothing gets past you, does it? 'What about you,' he says, as if he doesn't know- Shut your mouth. - page 283-284

Hello, what was that for? I just, like, really love you. - page 286

What are you doing? I'm taking a picture of a national gay landmark. And also a statue. It's funny. I always thought of the whole things as the most unforgivable thing about me, but you act like it's one of the best. Oh, yeah. The top list of reason to love you goes brain, then dick, then imminent status as a revolutionary gay icon. You are quite literally Queen Victoria's worst nightmare. And that's why you love me. My god, you're right. All this time, I was just after the bloke who'd most infuriate my homophobic forebears. Ah, and we can't forget they were also racist. Certainly not. Next time we shall visit some of the George III pieces and see if they burst into flame. - page 289

If Alex from this time last year could see this. He'd say, 'Oh I'm in love with Henry? That must be why I'm such an arse to him all the time'. - page 387

Thanks for reading!! If you enjoyed this post & would like to support me, you can give me a tip on my Ko-Fi! ☺️

[the---hermit]

My crochet picnic blanket is finally all done!

15|07|2023

I honestly wasn't planning on posting anything today, but my big blanket project is all finished and I am so proud I wanted to share it. Making this blanket took me a lot but less than expected. While making this I listened to two full audiobooks, listened to some great music and sat around my entire house. I worked on this on my balcony, on every sofa, on my bed and sitting on the floor. At the end I ran out of some yarn so I changed the peoject for the edge but I am still happy with this funky result! I cannot wait to test it out in my garden, and to find a new crochet project to work on. It's honestly such a relaxing and meditative activity I wish I always had a project in the works. Before I'll think of something else I might teach myself how to do embroidery as I had mention in one of my last posts. I feel like this summer will be just me reconnecting with my creative side as much as I can.

Chill hobbit summer activities of today:

Worked in the morning (not really into my chill hobbit summer plans but I gotta make some money and so I am working Saturdays)

Lots of silly times woth my brother since we were working together today and there weren't lots of people in the store

Blasted the new pvris album a lot

Finally finished my picnic blanket

Practiced Irish and French on duolingo

📖: Juniper and Thorn by Ava Reid

🎵: Take My Nirvana by PVRIS

[onyourowndaisymae]

obey me demon brothers on road trip

is this original? not even a little bit. but your girl is Burnt Out by life rn and resisting the urge to bury herself in a hole and not emerge for a couple weeks. take this humble offering as a STILL avoid working on requests because i am a menace who deserves to be prodded w a dirty stick

prompt: diavolo's got a fun trip planned. he's invited everyone to meet him on some obscure little beach across the devildom. only issue? it's not accessible by portal-- something or other about the wildlife, barbatos explains. guess that means everyone has to pile in for a long drive. the demon brothers in one car, the purgatory hall group accompanying diavolo and barbatos in the other... what could go wrong?

Lucifer

lucifer drives. there is no debate here on that.

he's got the gps screen in front of him at all times because there's nothing worse for his pride than getting lost and having to... hell forbid... ask for directions.

he controls the music, no exceptions. there is a premade (and preapproved) spotify playlist playing at a decent volume for everyone's listening pleasure. inevitably someone will add something stupid to the playlist (mammon keeps adding yung gravy, asmo added deepthroat inappropriate music, belphie kept adding audiobook recordings of paradise lost) and then lucifer gets pissed off and switches to the radio.

he has a strict stopping schedule for meals and bathroom breaks to ensure they get there on time, with extra time padding for when the plan inevitably goes to shit and they get to their destination four hours later than planned.

Leviathan

levi is sitting in the passenger seat for the drive. lucifer has determined him to be the least annoying for the entirety of the trip, so he sits in the front.

honestly? smart choice. levi spends most of his time curled up with a video game or 10 in silence. he appreciates the space of the passenger seat to spread out and keep his valuables close by. it's quieter up front as well, so he doesn't get overstimulated.

officially restricted to one cupholder. give him an inch and he'll take a mile spreading all of his shit across the car.

the grandmaster of chargers for the car ride. granted, most of them are his for his various consoles, but when mammon inevitably hops in the car with his D.D.D. at 12% battery, levi's the one that gets him a charger.

Asmodeus

asmo is in the second row, seated directly behind lucifer. this spot would have gone to belphie had lucifer not thought about the youngest kicking his seat during the drive just to be a pain.

the seats in the middle are standalone seats with an open aisle. this is good because asmo has spread himself dramatically across his seat and into the aisle.

after mammon, he's the one that gets most bored on the trip. cell service is spotty the entire drive, so his connection isn't good enough to spend the whole time on social media. he's brought a couple of magazines, too, but he gets motion sick if he reads too much in the car.

he eventually falls asleep at an awkward angle. saving grace for everyone else, seeing as they don't have to hear him whine in the car, but when he wakes up with a sore neck and a bad attitude...

Belphegor

belphie's seat is behind levi in the second row. he's banished to this spot so he can't kick lucifer, but also kept close by because everyone knows he'll quietly sleep the trip away anyways.

ideally, he'd pass out right away. but car naps have always proved tricky for him. if he sleeps normally, his head will fall forward and wake him up. he'd love to spread out, but asmo's legs are taking up too much of the aisle. if he leans his seat back, he has to hear mammon bitch and run the risk of getting scolded by lucifer. what's a demon to do?

his solution is to tie his head to the headrest. no, literally.

he takes off his jacket (cardigan? idk what that shit is) and ties it like a blindfold around his eyes. this way, his head won't flop forward and wake him up. oh, reader? does that sound like sensory hell to you? well, i agree. unfortunately for us, belphie passes out right away and sleeps like a corpse in this horrid arrangement the entire ride.

Satan

satan is seated behind asmo on the far left side of the back row. lucifer ensured he stayed in the back row to ensure his own sanity, so that satan wouldn't have the chance to fuck with him as he's driving.

satan hates this arrangement. it's hard to read when you're trapped in the back with beelzebub, who's constantly eating, and mammon, who's constantly bitching. he's moments away from blowing a fuse.

he tries to convince both belphie and asmo to trade spots with him, but neither of them are willing to give up their coveted middle seats, so he gives up.

his best solution is to wear noise cancelling headphones (asmo's suggestion) and bury his head in a book. but if beel elbows him one more time....

Beelzebub

beelzebub is in the middle of the back row. his aisle spot is earned by his size (he needs more leg room) and his penchant for snacking, which is what clutters the ground around asmo and belphie's outstretched legs.

he's pretty content to spend most of the drive snacking and looking out the windows. sure, it's a little cramped, but beel's pretty agreeable when he's fed.

he might doze off a little, but he's so big that when he inevitably slumps on to one of his brothers, they wake him up yelling and complaining.

he will try to talk his way into getting more snacks at every stop. and he usually wins, too, because he's finished everything in the car by that point.

Mammon

mammon is tucked into the back right corner seat behind belphie. this is because he has a knack for pissing lucifer off and nobody wants the car to crash before they even start vacation. shoving him in the back corner is an attempt to make everyone's ride more peaceful.

he spends most of his time on his phone. he cycles through every mobile game you've ever heard off, their knockoffs, and the knockoffs of the knockoffs. mans can't keep himself entertained.

the worst about bathroom breaks. he a) always needs to stop to pee and b) doesn't mention this until he's about to piss himself. it's like having a toddler i swear. and he dilly dallys through wherever they stop. visitor center? he's trying to jiggle the vending machine for free snacks. fast food place? he's trying to convince lucifer to buy him something. gas station? come on lucifer, he needs these gummy worms--!

eventually, mammon just sort of rests his head on the window and lets the bumps in the road turn his brain to soup. can't be bored if you can't think!

[toomuchracket]

Ok not smutty (not necessarily at least) so feel free to ignore but I was listening to the nyer radio hour and having bday party thoughts… does girly record her own audiobooks? Or maybe she doesn’t usually but chooses to do the audio for an essay she wrote for anthology and matty goes with her to the studiooo. Tbh I have no idea how any of that works, maybe she records it at home studio lol I’m feral for that au if you can’t tell

the essay collections haven't made it into audiobook form yet and your novel was actually narrated by florence pugh (big fan of yours. when she found out amy was named after little women she sent her a gift lmfao), BUT when condé nast come calling about radio hour and ask you to read a piece they just published of yours... you jump at the chance. they offer to set you up with studio time and a sound engineer, but before you can reply to the email matty's like "nahhhhhh you don't need them. i'll record it for you!! we'll make time in the studio for you next week!!", and he's so excited about his Bring Your GF to Work day idea that you agree. so, the following week, he practically skips into the studio holding your hand and leads you into the booth and explains how it all works - and takes a pic of you with the headphones on cos "oh my fucking god you're so cute" - before letting you record in peace. well, not quite; he sits at the deck looking at you lovingly, so lovingly that he forgets hit the button and your entire first take goes unrecorded lmfao. the second time is a lot better, although he's too busy running into the booth to hug you and be like "you're a natural. i should get you on the next 75 record" to forget to hit stop, so that and you replying with a giggle and a "me? i couldn't be on an album. what would i even do?" - naturally, then, that clip of you closes one of the songs on the next 75 album, a love song about you and how happy matty is to be with you (his version of everywhere by fleetwood mac, he likes to say lol). but yeah! the essay is a hit with the listeners, so that's definitely not the last time you go to the studio with matty to work on your own shit. cute <3

[thegrimreaperisanerd]

hi :) binge read your de fic that you have posted on ao3 last night and really enjoyed all of it! excited to see any updates. was wondering if you have any rec for other fic youve read and enjoyed-- i am not god's bravest soldier and do not enjoy trudging through tags and was wondering if you had read anything yourself that you really enjoyed lolol

Hey, thanks so much!!! Sorry it's taken a couple days to answer this, I'm poor as shit and have two jobs now wah... capitilism...

I'm working on the next 46' chapter, It's about 70% complete and I generally let it sit for an evening once it's done then re-read it the next day to catch the vast majority of mistakes (I edit everything myself) so I'd say expect that in the coming days.

I have some thoughts! I... Have never been asked for fic recs before so I'm gonna list a bunch in no particular order that I enjoyed, and reasons why. I will note that I tend to enjoy meaty plot-based works over fluff, so that's what I'll be recommending. Anyway!

Paddling Out (THE REPEATER CORPSE CONUNDRUM) - @transhitman - So this is the first DE fic I read and it set the bar pretty fucking high. YOU'VE GOT: a very cool and insular setting (don't get me wrong I like fics where they travel around Revachol too, but there's something to be said for building a set and living in it for a while) YOU'VE GOT: extremely harrowing tension and pale-fuckery YOU'VE GOT: some genuinely beautiful, heartfelt moments (I don't want to spoil anything but "people don't need your permission to care about you" kinda undid me) YOU'VE ALSO GOT: Amazing art?! Always a bonus, I wish I could draw people lol

Have You Heard The News That You're Dead? - Wizardlover - Time Loop shenanigans hell yeah! Basic premise: Kim is *unable* to save Harry's life after he's shot at the tribunal, each time he dies he Reawakens in Martinaise on the first day and desperately has to try and find a way to either prevent the Tribunal entirely, or survive it. I think the major draw to this one is how well it's characterised and how well that lends to the major source of tension: trying to convince THE WORLD'S BIGGEST SKEPTIC that you *a man he 'has only just met'* is actually stuck in a time loop. Juicy shit.

The Case Of The Man Who Two-Thirds Wasn't There - @glisteningceruleaneyes - We got another case fic here, gang. This is one of those "they travel around Revachol" numbers I previously mentioned. A lot to love about this fic; the minor OCs are all loveable (or at least well-written, looking at you Mr. Bigot-All-Rounder), the elements of writing in the game's style (particularly use of Harry's 'to do' list that you find in the ledger, you don't see that as often!) are all fantastic. Also without spoiling too much I'm a sucker for hurt/ comfort :) I like when bad things happen to our specialist guy :) ALSO! alternating chapters, Kim vs Harry's perspectives contrast REALLY well! Just a super enjoyable read. - On that note I also wanna include a special mention: there's a podfic for this one and since I mentioned my two jobs, I've been listening to audiobooks at work (I'm a cleaner. It's very boring) and that was a fun change of pace!

The Emergent Causeway - hal_incandenza - Now you KNOW this one is good because it's the only *unfinished* fic I'm recommending. Again, We've got art! We've got a brand new (non-Revachol!) setting that still feels excellently Elysium! We got that excellent balance of humour and misery from the get go! EXCELLENT murder mystery so far, I am intrigued AND also there's a fucking puppy. Hell yeah. This one's from Kim's perspective and does a really good job of it, nothing like a man being begrudgingly sent on holiday and being somewhat relieved to have a corpse to deal with.

A Spilled Kaleidoscope - @spilledkaleidoscope - I'm actually recommending a series here. Real definition of "came for the art, stayed for the writing" I mostly have a soft spot because I got to watch a few "haha, what if-?" musing text posts become a series of written chapters and INCREDIBLE DRAWINGS HOLY SHIT. Like, you really just draw hands for fun, huh? This person made a pact with some sort of devil beasts to draw hands very good, at the bare minimum we can read their fiction.

Nothing To Lose But Our Chains - Lepak - I almost forgot this one and I honestly can't believe it because this is one of these ones that you need a cigarette afterwards. Good fucking god. This is probably the best fic I've ever read in terms of not shying away from the heavy themes that make Disco Elysium such a beautiful, moving game. It tackles a racism in many forms, particularly how people like Kim (in working for the RCM) and immigration laws do their part in upholding racist systems, despite the way it hurts him too. Of course, it's also excellently written with tense scenes and some real funny moments. A real good'un here.

The Catacomb Killer - SupposedToBeWriting - Give Harry more memory loss. Make him convinced he killed a kid. Make *Kim* convinced he killed a kid... Then the plot thickens. I won't lie I can't remember fuck all about this one because I was mostly drunk when I read it, but if it was good enough that I kept reading instead of smoking a spliff or something then it must have been excellent... I will re-read it when I have the time, lmao.

MURDER ON THE AIRWAVES - @randomisedmongoose - I'm just a really big fan of murder mysteries and gore. You show me somebody with brain matter pouring from their earholes and I'm like "yum yum, more of that please." I am a sucker for curious methods of murder and this one's good for that. Lots of trekking back and forth like in the game again. More ACAB - always good.

I did not mean to include this many...........................

Oh well. Here's my list, there are plenty of others I've enjoyed but these are just the ones that came to mind! Thanks again for reading my fic! Always makes me happy when people let me know they enjoy my writing :3

[tarabyte3]

Tell me ur fav thing abt Andy <3

You're giving me the opportunity to gush about one of my favorite topics, and I cannot thank you enough for this opportunity. 💖 Trying to narrow it down to 5 things was difficult because there's so much about him that is pretty great. 😌

His sense of humor

Lesser known fact about Andy: he's a little troll. He actually loves doing the Gollum voice to make people laugh. You can see exactly how pleased he is with himself every time. He's also very good at being cheeky and sly, and the man loves to make himself laugh as well. It's infectious as fuck, especially when he does the nose scrunch. If you've ever listened to him tell a story or watched one of his Stephen Colbert interviews, it really shines through then and it's great. (This is why the last time I met him at a con, making him have to stop what he was doing to genuinely laugh was one of my best moments)

His passion

He loves what he does, but more than that he believes in it. He believes in the advancement of film technology that he's constantly in the thick of, and he believes in the importance of creativity and stories. It shows in every interview he gives. When he talks, he puts his entire body into it in the same way he does when he acts. He thinks stories can make the world a better place, and I find that level of hope and optimism beautiful and inspiring.

His talent

I own all of his movies and shows on DVD. (This is not hyperbole. If it was released on DVD, I own it.) So I have seen some pretty terrible things just because Andy is in them, but even then, HIS performance is never bad. Even in films or TV shows from the 90s when he was just getting warmed up, he was already a very good actor. And he's only gotten better. Just look at The Planet of the Apes trilogy. If his performance capture work doesn't convince you, watch Andor. Watch The Accused. Watch Death of a Superhero.

Take that and apply it to his directing, his innovation in performance capture, and his audiobooks. He plays the tenor sax beautifully, he paints, he does photography. In other words: it's not fair. 🥺

His generosity and kindness

He's constantly supporting or working with charities, particularly when it comes to children and education. He also does conventions just to be able to connect with his fans. Because he absolutely doesn't need the money and the man is insanely busy, but he still travels (sometimes twice in one weekend) just to spend time at conventions and sit at a table for hours. He meets hundreds of people in a day, and he still treats everyone with the same level of kindness and excitement and energy. Doesn't matter if you see him first thing or right before the convention closes. You get him at his best.

And finally: HAVE Y'ALL SEEN THIS MAN? JESUS CHRIST HNNGGG

Like oh my god. Oh my fucking god. The world can be a shitty place, but as long as that face exists I will have some hope. As a treat. Because that jawline and those beautiful nasolabial folds makes me want to believe there is a god.