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daydreams-magic01 · 3 years ago

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Comforts

(Remus Lupin x Female Reader)

(Not my gifs, credit goes to the creators)

Main Masterlist

Requested by: Anon

Requests: Open

Fandom: Harry Potter (The Marauders Era)

Request: 'Remus lupin x fem reader where she just had a bad day and everything hurts and just wants comfort'

Thank you so much for requesting. Please, do say if you want any changes. I tried to get forward the bad day, and there is comfort at the end, do not worry, and it is all Remus content.

Warnings: Swearing.

Words: 1.3K

Disclaimer: This is a fanfiction, the scenarios, the reader, and the dialogue are all mine.This should only be found on my blog.

Author is always me on this blog @daydreams-magic01.

A/N: Please do not copy or plagiarise this, or put it in your own book, etc. It should only be found here. Also, please mention if I should make a taglist and if you wanted to be added. I also tried by best at being British.

Thank you.:)

Taglist:

@regulusblackswhorecrux

~~~~~~~~~~~~Please do not copy ~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hi," Remus grins down to her, swaying back and forth on the heels of his feet, his hands clasped behind his back.

It is currently lunch in the Great Hall, and per his friends' harassment, he has finally gathered up the courage to come and speak to her. She does not look up, but he notices her lips curling upwards into a smile, well as much as he can see as she is looking down to her meal.

"Hey."

His cheeks instantly flush, his palms beginning to sweat, and he halts his movements to stand still, "how are you?"

She turns to him and smiles, although it does not meet her eyes, making his own falter, "still recovering from that prank you pulled this morning," she jokes.

He curses his friends at that moment, and it takes all his power to not turn and glare at Sirius. Flashing an awkward smile, he straightens his tie, looking down at her, before speaking, "yes. Sorry about that, it wasn't for you, it was for -"

"Mulciber?" She asks, quirking her head to the side, her smile finally meeting her eyes. His smile falters for a second, his flush spreading to his neck as his fingers struggle and fumble to now fit in his pockets. Instead, he decides to nod. She mirrors his actions, fingers still curled around the cutlery on her plate. "I heard about what happened to Mary," she bites her lip in thought, and for a second, Remus truly believes he has gone to heaven; she is so cute, "I feel awful. Have you spoken to her recently?"

Remus shakes his head, furious at the future death eater for attacking his housemate, "no, we only really talk to each other."

(Y/n) raises a hand to her mouth, covering her obvious laughter, "I wouldn't say I'm surprised if I take into account my treatment this morning."

"Hey!" He laughs, shoulders relaxing, "It was Sirius! Plus, I thought you would have been madder about your essay." He is only joking, but it only reminds (Y/n) of her day, making her frown and her brows furrow.

She fakes him a smile, hands running down to smooth out her school skirt, "I was until you lot ruined my school uniform, and I had to leave Herbology and go all the way back to the common room to change." She does not mean to appear rude, and upon his frown, she apologises immediately.

He shakes his head, a small smile on his face to ease her tension, "no, you're right. We should be more careful with who we prank, make sure it's the right person."

(Y/n) gasps, placing a hand on her chest as she fights back her grin, "do my ears deceive me or did Remus Lupin just mention consequences? And being careful?" She gasps again.

He shakes his head, failing to bite back his own grin, "I have you know we always are."

"No, no," she shakes her head, sorrows of the day forgotten, "of course you are, my bad."

Mustering all his confidence, he slides into the empty gap on her right, feet still facing the aisle. She holds her breath at their proximity. Not only can she smell his aftershave - which is ever so lovely - but his knees are an inch from her. Shoulders tense, she lets out a giggle, reaching up to straighten the collar of her school blouse and to tuck in her cardigan.

He doesn't notice, more focused on their proximity too; he can smell her perfume and almost count all her freckles.

Their eyes meet, and both are left on edge, "ask our countless victims; we always make sure to get them." It comes more out as an utter as both subconsciously begin to lean in.

"GET SOME MOONY!" Sirius shouts from where he sits, fists pumping the air. Peter looks at him in glee whilst James attempts to hide his own smirk.

~~~~~~~~~~~~Please do not copy ~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sirius' 'joke' only worsened poor (Y/n's) mood. Everything is going wrong today. First, her alarm clock did not wake her up, so she missed breakfast, then Remus' stupid friends pull a dumb practical joke which made her miss the homework announcement, and then her essay somehow blew out of her hands when walking from Herbology to Transfiguration and landed on The Black Lake, getting it very wet - as you can imagine. The rest of the day did not get much better, with Sirius' comment and the teasing that followed from basically the entire school. Of course, Remus did not get much backlash. Stupid Remus. Then, in the last period, she blew up her potion. Like an imbecile!

(Y/n) sighs, shutting her eyes as she sits on the wall in the courtyard, back facing the fountain. It wasn't Remus' fault as much as it was her own. To think she almost kissed him in front of the Great Hall, and that would have been embarrassing - for being caught, not kissing him specifically.

Her eyes remain shut as a person comes and sits to her left; she knows it's Remus from his aftershave. She hears him drop his Backpack next to her Satchel. His robes are against her thigh, and her cheeks flush.

"(Y/n), I am so -"

"Ow!" Her eyes shoot open, hand going to her knee, which Remus had knocked when attempting to turn and face her.

"Shit!" Remus jumps up, eyes darting up and down her leg, looking for an injury. "I am so sorry. Bugger!" His eyes are wide and, he looks so panicked, that (Y/n) can't help but smile.

"Remus, it's okay," she smiles up to him, patting his previous seat next to her. His brows furrow, but he does as she asks, uttering several more apologies, as well as profanities. "Everything hurts today," she sighs.

She had knocked her knee when tripping over during the prank, her eyesight having been clouded, but she did not want to upset him.

He continues to frown, "is there anything that I could do?"

"Not really, I just -"

Sudden warmth envelopes her as she tilts forward, and it takes her a second to realise Remus has pulled her into a hug. "Is this okay?" He whispers, fearing his voice may crack or sound strained.

She smiles, eyes fluttering shut, and she wraps her arms around him, "perfect."

Remus is a great hugger, and this must be one of the best hugs (Y/n) has had this entire school year, mostly because she hasn't been able to go home, and it is also the Remus Lupin.

For a few minutes, they sit there, both enjoying the simplicity of this action and finally getting what they need. "I am sorry," he whispers, "about that prank and your essay."

"And I missed breakfast," she whispers, tightening her hold.

"And you missed breakfast," his voice wavers as he tries not to laugh, eyes still shut.

"It's not funny."

"You're right, it's not funny, sorry," they both laugh, "although your potion was quite entertaining, I think it took Sirius' eyebrows off."

(Y/n) laughs, properly and loudly for the first time that day, and Remus finds himself looking down at her, his heart thumping and a grin forming on his face.

"He deserved it," she mumbles into his chest. Remus glances around, relieved to see that no one else is in the courtyard, and he begins to rub circles with his thumb on her back.

"That he did."

"Is it okay if I keep hugging you?" You wouldn't believe it, but the two have been friends for years, Remus only just realised his feelings, which is why he was so embarrassing.

"Always."

~~~~~~~~~~~~Please do not copy ~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yeah, fuck you Snivellus, I'm going to steal your line - Moony

~~~~~~~~~~~~Please do not copy ~~~~~~~~~~~~

#remus lupin x reader #remus x y/n #remus x you #remus x reader #marauders x reader #remus lupin x y/n #harry potter x reader #young remus lupin x reader #the marauders x reader #remus lupin x female reader #remus lupin x fem!reader

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thelavendersquid · 2 years ago

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About Me

Hello hello 👋 I’m Emily - she/they, 21. I’ve been a silent lurker/observer in the tickle community for a good few years now, and now I’ve finally started to embrace my love of/special interest in tickling so here I am with my very own blog. :) I would love to make some friends with the same interest! Here's the thing about communicating with me though - we need to talk about something. I get easily overwhelmed by private messages especially if it's just something like a hello. So we can skip the small talk, just jump right in to whatever you want to talk to me about. It’s more likely that I'll respond if you do. :) And I love questions! Send me asks if you’d like, or jump into my DM’s with a question! Doesn’t matter how random, random is my favorite. My response times can be anywhere from minutes to weeks depending on how busy my life and overwhelmed my brain is - and with that said, I don't attach any meaning to how fast or slow someone messages me back, so please don't feel pressured to respond quickly or to apologize if you don't!

I also have interests besides tickling! (Although there is certainly overlap with these things and that). Here are some fandoms I'm involved in/media I like. I’ll bold the ones I’m currently obsessed with and try to keep it updated.

Critical Role - The Mighty Nein

What We Do In The Shadows

Good Omens

Lucifer

Sander's Sides

The Good Place

Sherlock

Six of Crows

Simon Snow Trilogy

Harry Potter - Marauder's Era

Loki (the Marvel show)

Hazbin Hotel

Most Disney movies

Avatar: The Last Airbender

But I'm not picky when it comes to tickling - fun fact, 99% of the time when I start watching a new series, it’s because I’ve spent the prior few weeks/months reading tickle fics with those characters and going from knowing nothing about them other than that they’re ticklish, to knowing enough to be intrigued to see more 😆 So you can pretty much come into my asks/inbox to talk about tickle ideas or head cannons for literally any fandom or characters and I'll be happy to hear and talk about it.

Also! I’m a writer! I’m currently working on a book - an urban fantasy adventure exploring the good the bad and the ugly of laughter, accepting and befriending all the parts of yourself, and discovering where you fit into the world.

My OC’s include a walking disaster laughter magician, a serious ghost terrified of laughter, an orphaned werewolf, an overworked guardian angel, a pick-pocket faerie, a a soul-artist ghost hunter, a sentient shadow, a literal tickle monster, and a demon in charge of Hell’s rehabilitation program. I would LOVE to tell you more about any of them! I share posts that remind me of them (and occasionally snippets of my writing) with the tag #my OCs

Also! I love and collect goofy jokes and bad puns - so if you'd like to share one with me PLEASE DO. I keep a list.

Back to tickling, I’m also fascinated by the science side of tickling - the physiological and psychological reaction and effects and all that great stuff. The entire phenomenon fascinates me. If you’re interested in that aspect of tickling too let’s be nerds together.

Oh and you can send me pictures of your animals anytime and we will be friends immediately if you do.

Ok that's it! Thanks for being here! 😄

#about me #tickling community #tickle community

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yourlocalmaraudersbabe · 3 years ago

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Hiya! May I request a sirius x reader imagine where the marauders are all hanging out by the black lake. James or remus (probably James tbh) pranks the reader by throwing them in the black lake. What he didn't know is that they are scared of deep dark waters and almost drown and sirius saves them? Fluffy fluffy ending please?

I hope you have a good day!~

💜

“You’re right, nobody can be as lovely as me”

Summary: James thinks it’s funny to throw you in the water and Sirius is there to pull you out

A/N: omg look who decided to post :=)

Warnings: drowning/not be able to swim and there's like one swear word

Word Count: 1401

Masterlist + Characters and ships I write for

Requests are always open <3

Fluff Dialogue Prompt List

Join my taglist here!

“Please enjoy your dinner and relax this evening!”

You sat with your friends, directly next to Sirius while Dumbledore’s voice boomed through the Great Hall, food appearing down the table in front of you.

There were only a couple days left of your sixth year at Hogwarts, the summer holiday so close you could reach out and grab it.

“So what are we doing after dinner?” James asked.

You grabbed a spoonful of mashed potatoes, starting to make a plate of food for yourself. “How about we hang out by the lake?”

James quickly swapped his plate for yours, leaving you to give him a lovely middle finger.

“Prongs,” Sirius chastised as you laughed. You laid a head on his shoulder, telling him it was harmless.

Your boyfriend pushed his own plate over in front of you, urging you to sit up and eat.

James shrugged his shoulders, promptly digging into the wonderful food in front of him.

“Y/n,” Lily started. “I really like that idea. We can all go—”

“But y/n never swims,” Peter cut her off, nearly whining.

“Yeah, it’s not fun without you,” James added. “Why can’t you just go in for even a little bit?”

You glared at the two of them. “Absolutely not.”

Sirius grabbed your hand under the table, squeezing it before placing a kiss to the top of your head. “You better not have just gotten crumbs in my hair,” you whispered, shoving his shoulder.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You stepped outside, hand in hand with Sirius as the warm glow of the sun setting lay a blanket on the world around you. Your friends had already made their way out here, the only reason you two are arriving now is because of the boy next to you.

“C’mon, I need to go back to my dorm. I wanna bring a towel in case I decide to go in.”

“Well do you want to swim or not?” you asked.

“I haven’t decided yet,” he laughed.

“You are the most indecisive person I know, Sirius,” you took his hand, following him up to Gryffindor tower.

“Am not.”

“You are,” you laughed. “Well I’m deciding to lay out, maybe read a book. I’ve also decided that I’m stealing a blanket.”

“Hey, stop rubbing your decision making skills in.”

“Oh, and I’ve decided I’m stealing a jumper.”

He gave a dramatic frown.

You gave a quick kiss on the side of his cheek as he stepped through the portrait hole.

“Well can I at least pick which jumper you steal?”

“Hmm, I don’t know if you’d be able to decide which one.”

You spotted your friends and they waved, casting you smiles from the lake.

Sirius dropped your hand, skipping a couple steps to be in front of you, walking backwards.

“I have a question for you, y/n.”

“Ask away,” you sighed, a smile curling at the corners of your mouth.

“Be honest. Would you still give me a hug if I were to have just gotten out of the water? A kiss perhaps?”

You burst out laughing. “No. No way. Not when I’m perfectly dry.”

“Well maybe we’ll have to test out that theory.”

You deadpanned. “You’re hilarious.”

“I am, aren’t I?”

You spread out your blanket, lying down and soaking in what the sun had to offer before setting completely.

Sirius made his way to the water before the light had disappeared entirely. You closed your eyes, enjoying some much needed rest.

You didn’t know how long you’d been asleep for, and it didn’t really matter now. All you knew that you were hovering over the lake. You had to be dreaming.

You couldn’t tell how high up you were, you were barely able to make out the silhouettes of your friends.

“Ha-ha, very funny!” you called out. “You can put me down now.”

James’s voice echoed up to you. “What? You don’t want to come in for a little swim with us?”

You looked down and saw his little grasp on his wand as he controlled how far you were from falling.

“James, please put me down on the grass.”

You could hear it in his voice. You could hear how he expected this to just be a harmless little prank of his.

“But it will be much funnier if you plop into the water. Just a small plink.”

He didn’t even give you time to respond before you were plummeting into the lake. Your friends were further away than they seemed to be. James had thrown his head back in laughter, ignoring you. Ignoring how fear took over your body, making it nearly unbearable to relax and just float. It was hard to breathe, you could barely even cough as you struggled to stay above water.

“James? What the fuck?” Sirius was at your side in a matter of moments, his arms wrapped around you as you clung onto him for dear life. You had gotten yourself into a coughing fit, as soon as you were steady afloat. You didn’t know if the tears streaming down your face were from embarrassment or genuine fear.

“I feel pathetic,” you finally whispered to Sirius as he swam to the grass.

“Everyone has something that gets to them like this. James didn’t know,” he whispered back while he lifted you out of the water, pulling himself up after. “Are you alright? Can you breathe okay? Do you need to see Madam Pomfrey?”

You sat up, wiping at the tears from in your eyes, your hands moving to fumble with the grass blades in front of you. “I think I’m alright.”

Sirius called for a towel with a near perfect wordless spell. He caught it before it flew right into the back of your head, wrapping it around your body snuggly. He ran his fingers over your face, wiping away the droplets of water, pushing your hair back out of the way. “I’m really sorry about all this, y/n,” he said. “I wish I would’ve seen what was happening.”

The overwhelming feeling had pooled tears in your eyes. You slouched down, leaning into his side. “No, it’s alright. It’s not your fault,” you choked out a laugh, wiping under your eyes.

He took your hand, curling his fingers around yours, rubbing gently against the top. “Want me to go get James? Rough him up a bit?”

A smile crept upon your face. “No, it’s alright.”

A genuine laugh bubbled up in your throat. He hugged you tight, speaking quietly. “How about we go back up to my dorm? Get settled in some warm clothes?”

“I like that idea,” you said. “But only if you carry me.”

And that’s exactly what Sirius did. He carried you all the way up to his dorm, letting you change into dry clothes and slip under the covers first.

He didn’t take long himself, turning the bathroom light off as he made his way over to you. He pulled back the blanket atop of you for a brief moment before laying down and pulling you up against his chest with one swift movement of his arm. You turned your head upwards, opening your mouth to talk, yet failing to produce any words. Your voice cracked, tears appearing once more.

Sirius rolled you over, brushing the hair out of your face and wiping away the tears as they spilled over, muttering soft notes of reassurance. “You’re okay now, y/n.”

“It was really scary,” you whispered, the lump in your throat aching as you spoke.

“I know, darling. But look where you are,” he smiled, kissing your forehead sweetly. “Let’s focus on the present: you’re in bed with me, you’re in comfortable clothing, and you have a blanket to keep you warm and safe.” He tucked the material closer up under your neck.

“I’m right here. Nothing like that is going to happen again,” he trailed off. “I’m here to hold you, darling.”

“Thank you.”

He kissed your nose and wiped away the last of the tears. You turned over once again, tucking yourself in his arms.

It was quiet for a mere moment.

“Hey, you’re sure you don’t want to get back at James? I could make a wonderful polyjuice potion over the summer. James would make for a lovely black dog I know of.”

You contemplated. “I don’t think James could pull off being that lovely.”

“You’re right, nobody can be as lovely as me.”

Sirius Black Taglist(if your name is crossed out I couldn’t tag you :( and send me an ask if you’d like to be removed): @violetrainbow412-blog @wisedreamcatcher @scorpiobaby22 @emmaev @harrypotter0addict @siriusbarnesslut @talksoprettyjjx @onyourgoddamnleft @ilovejamespotter @florqlness @l1lli @confuscita @niceandspicy @emmysworld @i-do-random-things-do-not-ask @daedreamss

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uppastthejelliclemoon · 4 years ago

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Ao3 Fic Masterpost

alright, this is going to be a bit of a long post, but i have been meaning to make this for a while!

so my Ao3 is hearth_goddess, in case some of you didn’t know!

i know i post most of my updates for my fics on this blog, but i thought i’d just do a whole masterpost of all the fics i have on my Ao3, with a bit of a summary on the series and why they’re organized the way they are!

check out my fics if you haven’t already, and feel free to send me prompts and/or suggestions!

Non-Cats Stories: these are stories I’ve written that aren’t in the Cats category at all, but I still love them!

back then was when we touched the starlight: my first Starlight Express story! I loved writing this, and I’d love to write more StEx in the future!

Soldier, Poet, King: a Percy Jackson/Heroes of Olympus songfic I wrote concerning my favorite trio of demigods. After listening to the song over and over again, I realized how well it fit, and I had to write something, and this is what came of that!

Choices: My first fic published on Ao3, and a Carlos-centric Disney Descendants story that doubles as a tribute to the late, amazing Cameron Boyce.

after the strike: a 1992 Newsies fic that I rewrote after posting it years ago on ff.net! I’m a sucker for protective!Jack Kelly, so this fic is purely self-indulgent!

and they lived happily ever after: literally pure Belle and Adam fluff for the 30th Anniversary of my favorite Disney movie!!

Chronicles of Narnia: i'm planning on adding more fics to this section, because CoN is so important to me

oh, brother of mine: a peter-centric story that focuses around peter's thought process as he finds edmund on the battlefield after jadis is killed

Stranger Things: the growing list of fics I've written that focus around the Stranger things characters

show no fear, for he may fade away: a stranger things fic focusing on Dustin getting Vecna'd and Steve being the best big brother bc i think they deserve some hugs <3

to the boy i wish was my brother: What Max wrote in her letter to Steve, plus Steve getting to cuddle with his two favorite kids

if you only hold me tight, we'll be holding on forever: the most angsty platonic soulmates Stobin fic that takes place during s5

come back to me, please: more Stobin s5 scenarios, except this one is soft and full of emotional reunions between my beloved dinguses

The Madrigal Triplets and their Mirabel: some sweet, short fics about Julieta, Pepa, and Bruno and their daughter/niece, Mirabel

green glasses: a sweet, fluffy, slightly angsty fic focusing on Bruno and Mirabel Madrigal from “Encanto”! I love their relationship, and couldn’t resist writing something for them!

little cloud: a short fic that focuses on Pepa and Mirabel Madrigal, and their relationship prior to the events of the movie and during the movie.

quiet smiles: a short focusing on Julieta and Mirabel Madrigal, and Julieta's inner monologue about the changes that she sees in her daughters prior to, during, and after the events of the movie.

we see how brave you've been: Pepa, Julieta, and Bruno's perspectives during Antonio's Gift ceremony and Mirabel's ceremony at the end of the movie.

visions: A brief glimpse into Bruno's visions, and how Mirabel became his favorite sobrina, even before she was born.

Aboard the Havoc Marauder: a collection of shorts about the Bad Batch, Omega, and their adventures around the galaxy!

is there an echo?: my first Star Wars fic featuring my favorite group of boys, the Domino Squad from Clone Wars, and the Bad Batch! (but specifically feat. Echo, because I love him.)

bigger than any of us: the Echo and Rex hug we should have gotten at the end of episode 7 of The Bad Batch, complete with some emotional heart to heart between the boys!

no one cares who your father was, only the father you will be: just Omega and her five dads being the softest family in the galaxy. They get all the hugs they very much deserve in this fic!

guilty conscience: Echo’s reaction after Hunter orders the Batch to leave him behind, and the overwhelming guilt that follows.

shadows: Echo being the best ori’vod to Crosshair, and Crosshair finally getting the hugs he deserves from his two older siblings (hint, the other older sibling isn’t Hunter)

a vod's hug: Echo's hugs, and how there is definitely something a little magical going on

plan 88: how season 2 should have ended, aka my determination in my delusions about Fives being alive and him and Echo reuniting

Standalone: these stories are part of the Cats category, but don’t fit in with any of my series!

Hearth’s Writing Corner: a collection of all the shorts I’ve written here on Tumblr, mostly Cats. Categories vary and updates are random.

tomorrow they’ll see what we are: my Cats/Newsies AU!! I’m so proud of this fic, and getting to write a story for two of my favorite musicals has been so much fun.

the magi-coolest cat: my forbidden Tuggoffelees fic that was 100% supposed to be written as a joke but i took it a little too seriously and now it’s one of my favorite stories.

The Alley Cat: my Thomas O'Malley is a Jellicle fic that focuses around him, Skimbleshanks, and his reunion with his family in the Junkyard.

Jellicle Prompts and Jellicle Shorts: these are the fics I’ve written that take place within the “canon” Cats Universe, though aren’t canon within each other

A Cursed Dream: Munkustrap-centric

The Adventures of Plato, Alonzo, and Etcetera: just a couple little snippets about some underrated kitties!

A Jellicle Through and Through: George-centric

Mr. Vague and Aloof and his Terrible Bore: Tuggoffelees-centric

His Precious Flower: Munkustrap and Jemima-centric

Terms of Endearment: Tuggoffelees-centric

The Story of Seven Kittens: Mistoffelees-centric

Until the Jellicle Moon Appears: Munkustrap tells the kittens about how the Jellicles came to be

hush my darling, don’t fear my darling: Deut Bros-centric

hold on tight, we shall never let go: Alonzo-centric

thrill of the chase: Tuggoffelees-centric

We’re A Family, We Stick Together: a human AU feat. OCs created by myself and my mutuals!

***please pay attention to the tags/warnings in some of these fics

Serafina’s Story: OC-centric

Jubilee’s Story: OC-centric

Athena’s Story: OC-centric

making the choice: Tuggoffelees and OC-centric

settling in: Tuggoffelees and OC-centric

ornaments and family: Jellicles-centric

don’t take the girl: Deuteronomy Bros+their girls-centric

i keep your memory, you visit me in my sleep: Seruggoffelees-centric

the long way home: Macavity-centric

missed opportunities: Seruggoffelees-centric

twitterpated: CanonxOC pairings-centric

1998/2019 Switch: the full versions of the blurbs and brief plots i mapped out here on tumblr under the same tag!

The Magicians: Mistoffelees-centric

Hearth and Home: stories concerning my OC, Hestia the Hearth Cat, and everything within her “canon”! these fics often feature the OCs of some of my mutuals, and i always list whose OCs are whose!

heart of stone: Serafina's backstory and how she left Macavity

Hearth and Home: How Hestia came to live with Tugger and Mistoffelees

The Hearth Cat and the Library Cat: Hestia and Jubilee meet

The Jellicle Ball: Hestia’s first Ball (aka the Musical Ball)

Ghosts: Hestia meets a stranger who seem oddly familiar

Family Photo: Tuggoffelees + their kids take a picture together!

Halloween: Some unexpected visitors come to the Junkyard

the pocket watch: Tumblebrutus gives Hestia a very special gift

i thought i'd never see your sweet face again: a 5+1 Tumbletta story within the Henchcat!Tumble AU

Tuggoffelees Week 2020: all the prompts from Tuggoffeelees Week 2020, including a prompt that launched the inspiration for my Newsies AU!

curls and coffee: First Meeting, Human AU

kisses and coffee: Kisses, Human AU

buttons and maybe: Fight/Reconciliation, 2019-verse

sure as a star: Favorite AU, Newsies

dyin’ ain’t so bad: Kidnapping, 1998, warning for character death

terribly aloof, vaguely boring: Personality Switch, 1998

i think i wanna marry you: Wedding/Engagement

Macavity's Victims: these are “canon” compliant stories that focus on the Deuteronomy brothers and Demeter and Bombalurina’s relationship

The Tale of Two Sisters and Three Brothers: how Demeter and Bombalurina ended up with Macavity, and what happened when they returned to the Junkyard.

A Strange Sense of Peace: After the Ball, and another semi-analysis of the Deuteronomy Brothers

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thecowardwrites · 4 years ago

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The Coward’s Winter Fic Recommendations 2020

I haven’t been writing a lot in the past few months, but I sure have been reading a whole bunch so here are my favorite fics for your holiday reading pleasure. (I was going to choose winter-themed ones but then I didn’t get to include a lot of my favorites so we will pretend they’re winter/holiday themed)

***I want to reiterate this is a recommendation masterlist, none of these works are mine I just really loved them a lot. (I will also be reblogging them on my other blog)***

The Witcher:

Hot Cocoa by @cap-n-stuff [Geralt x Reader] Summary: Geralt can never seem to get enough of your hot cocoa I really really really loved this! It was so cute, it made me feel all warm and fuzzy - I love these domestic fluff fics

Come Away With Me by @krysalla [Geralt x Reader] Summary: Geralt comes home to you after a four month separation. This was so beautifully written! The language, the little descriptions. I loved it. It’s definitely one of my new favorite comfort reads!

A Humble Favor by @onthepageoftears [Jaskier x Reader] Summary: Jaskier asks you to attend a banquet with him, but there’s a catch. This reminded me of a holiday romcom kind of thing which I love! I think it fits the season pretty well and it has one of my favorite tropes in it (fake dating anyone?) So so good <3

The Marauders:

I Loved You by @cunningambitousdetermined [Sirius Black x Reader] Summary: “Sirius Black was in love. That was the fact of the matter...” Okay this one didn’t really have a summary with it, but I thought the first line summed it up really well. I really loved this and it totally fits the wintery theme because there’s a snowball fight! --- Here’s part two for this! I haven’t read it yet but i’m about too I love it

To Be a Chocolatier by @unnecessarywriting [Remus Lupin x Reader] Summary: “Chocolate cures everything you know,” you said, still savoring the sweet taste....“Not everything,” he responded bitterly. You glanced over at his features....“Well, maybe those things that it isn’t curing don’t need to be cured,” you offered. This one also didn’t have a summary with it, so I just picked out the first line in the fic that made me squeal into my pillow like a banshee. Like seriously this one is so good please read it for the love of everything.

Mistletoe by @dogweedanddeathcaps [James Potter x Reader] Summary: James Potter is nothing if not persistent. Okay here’s a Christmas themed one! Absolutely adorable, absolutely amazing. I guarantee you the person that wrote this can do no harm in the world and if they did I would look the other way. Absolutely fantastic!

Haikyuu:

Fifty Kisses by @kodzurin [Kuroo x Reader] Summary: “I know I already kissed you like fifty times, but can I have fifty more please?” Yes, I am biased what about it? This one is by my best friend here on tumblr and I might have requested this from her, but we aren’t going to acknowledge that though because this is amazing anyways!

The First Rule by @thegreatk1ng [Sakusa x Reader] Summary: Life’s not easy when you’re a spy. Especially when you’re paired with Sakusa Kiyoomi for a mission that could change both of your lives. First off: SPIES! Like spy au? spy au! Sorry I get excited. But this is a really great series I think - I’ve only read Chapter one so far. Either way it is amazing the writing is absolutely gorgeous and I am so excited to read more! I think I found a new favorite haikyuu writer <3

Stay by @toshijimafarms [Daichi x Reader] Summary: “There’s my girl. How are you feeling?” No summary on this one so I just grabbed a line of dialogue from Daichi and called it a day! I love the “one of them is sick” tropes and I’m not really sure why. But this is so cute, so adorable, so fluffy! Literally anything you can use to describe a really amazing fluff fic. Awesome stuff here I’m in love with Daichi 20x more now.

Okay that’s all for now! These are just of my favorite fics that I’ve read in a while and seriously recommend all of you going to follow these amazing writers ASAP because they are doing gods work out here.

Check out my second blog @thecowardbutmakeitpersonal where I reblog some of my other favorite fics (i just made it so there’s not a lot on there yet) and other stupid get-to-know me type things!

That’s all! Happy Holidays to everyone celebrating something this winter season (I’m excited for the winter solstice) I hope it’s been great to you.

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juuls · 4 years ago

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Juulna’s ‘Hold Onto Your Sanity’ Fic, Book, and Music Recs for the 2020 Dumpster Fire... Part 3!

So you just crash-landed behind enemy lines in a war you know barely anything about except that your role seems infinitesimal and insignificant, and dumped into a year, 2020, that already seems fifteen years too long.

Before you drown your sorrows in some fantastic scotch or wine coolers for days (or weeks)… I have a proposal.

That you step back from the flames, tune things out for a bit, and try to forget about the outside world for a while (but don’t forget to vote or I will be very sad at you!).

These fics are meant to take you out of your head (I’m including more plot/story-minded fics than PWP) for the next few weeks or months as the world goes to hell (even more) but of course there are some bits of solid angst in these as there is wont to be in many a fic. Check the tags, read responsibly, don’t like-don’t read, ship and let ship, and please do leave a kudos and maybe even a comment! :)

This is PART THREE.

Check out here for Part One and most of the Marvel fic recs, along with a selection of book recs too. :)

And here’s Part Two, which has the bulk of my Star Wars and Game of Thrones recs, along with Spotify playlists!

Part Three is this one here, all about the Potterverse.

(Not yet complete) Here’s Part Four, filled with even more shippy goodness from all over the Star Trek universe. So. Many. Ships. :D

(Not yet complete) Part Five is Witcher, Man From UNCLE, Stargate: Atlantis and SG-1, Sherlock, Hannibal, and Doctor Who.

(Not yet complete) Part Six will probably be all for my newfound love of Supergirl, along with some Game of Thrones and Marvel ships I skipped, because I gotta stop somewhere with all these recommendations or I’ll be at it forever. Seriously, how much of this stuff have I read!?

But I think we all need some distractions from the world these days, eh? Or something to console us other than internet rage and a barrel of ice cream and/or hard alcohol.

Potterverse

I’ve chosen to pick fics (mostly) off of AO3 for their easy reading access, though HP fics’ golden years were on sites like fanfiction.net and other independent archives like Sycophanthex and others which have closed their doors over the years, sadly. Some of these fics date back to almost 20 years old, or more, amazingly!

For fics on fanfiction.net, I highly recommend using this link (FicSave) to epub/mobi converter rather than dealing with the frustrating app. It functions like AO3′s built-in download button.

SSHG/Sevmione

Rec assistance by @perrydowning

Second Life by Lariope

Phantom of Hogwarts by Good_Witch

Romancing the War by Pubella

The Poison Garden by turtle_wexler @turtlewexlerwrites

A Light in the Fog by turtle_wexler

Pride of Time by AnubisAnkh

The Savage by MagdatheMagpie

Snape’s Story by Tbird1965

Recognition by jezzie (krith)

Tedium of Time by oneredshoe

Tango by Desert_Sea

Sense and Insensibility by Desert_Sea

Time Mutable Immutable by Grooot

The Twenty by Leyna Rountree

For the Only Hope by ausland @run-with-me-to-the-sea

Bundle of Joy by LadyTuesday

Our Hands Tied by multilingualism

Choose Something Like A Star by TeddyRadiator

Mistress of the Stacks by Ms_Anthrop

A Derailed Train of Thought by Ms_Anthrop

Antiquities by stormcorona

Watch Over Me by @snapeslittleblackbuttons

Dropped Down into the Unknown by @q-drew

Delicate Transitions by @morbidmuch

Lay Me Low by TeddyRadiator

The Savage by MagdatheMagpie

Another Dream by @dragoon811

A Chance For Happiness by @corvusdraconis

Breath of the Nundu by corvusdraconis, Dragon_and_the_Rose

Just to Be by Amarti @amarti-writes-stuff

Hinge of Fate by Ramos

Forged in Flames by @mswhich

Days in the Sun by bluespring864

Making sure the boy who lived, actually does by Hold_en @hold-enwrites

The Problem With Purity by Phoenix.Writing

One Step Forward, Two Decades Back by corvusdraconis

The Headmaster’s Wife by Mrs_HH @propertyofseverustsnape

The Master, the Warden, the Headmaster, and the Deputy by mak5258

Cloak of Courage by Wendynat

Hermione Granger and the Intended Vessels by ShawnaCanon

Augury and Ardor by SnapeySnax

Before the Dawn by snarkyroxy

The Love You Take by Subversa

His Draught of Delicate Poison by Subversa

and sooooo many more if you want them just ask, this is both mine and Perry’s oldest ship lol

Gramander (Original Graves x Newt)

A Gilded Cage is Still a Cage by Anonymous

take a deep breath (and let it go) by lincesque @tumbloncat

Roar by @elenothar

Matchmaker, Matchmaker by @prosodiical

Dearly Beloved by prosodiical

Basic Instincts by @manic-intent

Promised by Miss_Lv

Plan G by Aate

Heat of the Chase by argentoswan @wannahearaboutmycats

Newt Scamander’s Guide to Getting Things Done by arthureameslove

Against all Odds by Maril

Where I Belong by Mishafied

He Wants To Say, “I Love You, Nothing Can Hurt You” by @obsidionwingsofmidnight

Arranged by Miss_Lv

death of a bachelor by gudetama (elementary)

The Graves Identity by Mishafied

you make me feel this way somehow by gudetama (elementary)

The Nature of the Beast by AntiGravitas @absolutelynogravitaswhatsoever

The Knights, the Newt, and the Rose by @yinyangswings

The Wizard’s Cat by @natecchi

The Color of Boom by gypsiangel

Signalling Theory: Blue Coat by @obaewankenope

Flame by @esamastation

And The Tag Read Simply: “Pretty” by @funkzpiel

Aren’t You Gonna Arrest Me, Officer? by JoyBurd

a little bit lost by shortbread @shortbread-fanfiction

Dramione

Rec assistance by @cuthian

Seven Times by kerri240879

Her Beauty and the Moonlight by BrilliantLady

The Fallout by everythursday (orphaned and only available on AO3 now, but complete)

The Eagle’s Nest by HeartOfAspen

Turncoat by elizaye @imnotleavinherewithoutyou

The Virgin Conundrum by AkashaTheKitty @akashathekitty

Bad Faith by Morrighan256

Isolation by bexchan @bex-chan-blog

The Serpent, the Witch, and the Broom Closet by bitchywitchy

Silencio by AkashaTheKitty

All You Want by senlinyu @senlinyu

Static by galfoy @heymanticore

What the Room Requires by Alydia Rackham

And We All Fall Down by @rumaan

Ambition’s End by Hanako A

Wait and Hope by mightbewriting @mightbewriting

Rewriting Destiny by mayawrites95 (mayarox95)

Chronos Historia by In_Dreams @indreamsink

A Muggle-born Magic by Musyc @willhavetheirtrinkets

Hunted by Bex-chan

A Second Look by @riverwriter

The Nietzsche Classes by Beringae

This Too, Is Sacred by HeartOfAspen

Bite First, Ask Questions Later by Daredevilsinthedetails, Kaylessi

Nocturnus by In_Dreams @indreamsink

Broken by @inadaze22

The Green Girl by Colubrina

Lady of the Lake by Colubrina

Rebuilding by Colubrina (really just anything written by @colubrina)

Presque Toujours Pur by @shayalonnie

Can’t Change the Way I Am by @nauticalparamour

Law and Marriage by DragonGrin (formerly TeenTypist)

The Tower Window by @xodramaqueenox

Unexpected by Emara88

Something Old, Something New by Kate Dessi

Suppressed Emotions by hopelesslydevoted.xx

Silver Blood by @freyaishtar

When the Day Met the Night by @bex-la-get

Harmony

A Marauder’s Plan by CatsAreCool (Rachel500)

A Step to the Right by CatsAreCool (Rachel500)

Eighth by lorien829

The Catalyst by lorien829

Harry Potter and the Isle of Mists by lorien829

Knife’s Edge by Celtic55

The Black Book by mosteveryonesmad

Awakening by SweetShireen

The Sword and the Snake by bartonfink1974

Dispelling the Silence by Indygodusk

One Year Later: Return to Hogwarts by Twilight’s Inferno

DraHarmony

Fourteen Thousand Galleons by @frumpologist

The Invitation by hot_elf @hot-elf

Love Love Love by MissELY @misselylux

Changing Scenery by aethling

East of Eden by msmerlin @ms-merlinblack

Turn Back Time by Dazeventura6

Foxfire by @setissma

Come Together by @nuclearnik

The Soul of the Wolves by LR_Earl @fanficbylrearl

Running From Lions by tryslora @tryslora

An Unexpected Family by ladyroxanne21

The Prophecies by jamcreynolds

Drarhinny

Reconstruction by @aldersprig

Fell From the Sky by BrandonStrayne @brandonstrayne (I really love this one, and not just as a Canadian.)

Demons From the Past by pottermum

Drarry

Rec assistance by @newtypeshadow

Rarely Pure and Never Simple by birdsofshore

Aural Gratification by birdsofshore

Lost Among and Falling by @bafflinghaze

The Corruption Sequence series by beren @berenwrites

Sentinel ‘verse series by elyssblair @elyssblair-blog

Date Blindness by dysonrules

Starts With a Spin by Maxine @serasarahhhh

Temptation on the Warfront by alizarincrimson

Paradigm by dysonrules

Here’s The Pencil, Make It Happen by ignatiustrout

Draco Sodding Malfoy by Shewhxmustnxtbenamed @shewhomustnotbenamed

Pieces of What by Jadwiga

Found, Not Lost by inspiration_assaulted

Shared Detention by DadIWriteGayPorn

Dirty Little Secret by Writcraft @writcraft

19 Years by shilo1364 @whimsicaldragonette

Morning Suns & Coffee Runs by laugh_a_latte @queer-coffee

Reus Una by purplepen76

Between Ink and Blood by Candamira

Ginmione

Distractions by @morningsound15

Cissamione

(This seems like it’s a bit cracky, but there’s some good ones, I promise! I sorta stumbled ass-backwards into this ship but really enjoy some of them.)

One Step Left by Cysteine @cysteine

Extinction by @rubikanon

Blinding Light by @16-pennies

Somebody Loved by beforeyouspeak

...

There. This is much better, isn’t it?

So my challenge to you, if your world is falling, burning down around you in flames... is this:

...if you feel yourself getting anxious or depressed, whether from the news or being cooped up in isolation or bored or on the verge of tearing your hair out or jumping off that roof or grabbing something to go after the dictator-of-the-week.... pause, take a breath, open up this rec list, close your eyes and pick something, and let chance take you somewhere hopefully far away. Let yourself be transported.

Oh, and don’t click on this Google Drive link. Really, there’s not 30+ GB of data on that Drive I’m sharing. Shame. There totally aren’t tens of thousands of books, as many audiobooks as could fit, and a large collection of fanfiction downloaded from AO3 in there. (Also, not all fics have been shared to that folder yet; I’m working on it a little at a time as I download more.)

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lazyevaluationranch · 4 years ago

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I was wondering if you would be willing to share the titles of your resilience-inspiring lesbian farm books? My google search led me to a book titled “Attack of the Lesbian Farmers” which, while certainly inspiring, is not exactly what I was looking for.

Here are two very different books in the Farm Lesbians Write Honestly About What Went Wrong And How They Got Through It genre. Hopefully at least one is to your taste.

It's nearly fifty years old now, and can be hard to find, but Country Women: A Handbook for the New Farmer is deeply important to me. Country Women was a black and white xeroxed magazine written by a collective of woman-run farms in California in the 1960s. (There are some issues scanned at the Lesbian Poetry Archive). Each issue was half articles about feminism and half articles about small-scale farming. In the 1970s, the how-to articles on farming were expanded and organized to make the book, along with some scattered journal entries, lovely hippie-style line drawings and poetry about wood splitting, bees, and gazing at one's beloved while fixing the tractor on a summer day. The contributors have names like Jean and Ruth Mountaingrove, Ellen Chanterelle, and Sam♀ Thomas.

It's written in an informal and pragmatic style, mostly organic hippie farming, but using pesticides or conventional medications when necessary.

This afternoon the Anderson brothers began teaching me how to graft fruit trees - the careful joining of life with life. Even more than I loved gaining a new skill, I loved learning from two old men who have so very much to teach me. I admire the audacity of eighty-three-year-old men setting grafts that will not bear fruit for years: the total involvement in a process they love. Those trees will stand and live; I doubt whether Jake or Fred even stop to wonder if they'll pick the fruit. I want to live my life with that kind of harmony and purpose. I want to be planting seeds the day I die.

The first lamb was born today. Premature and dead. Olivia, the mother, seems to be all right though. I had a dream a few weeks ago that the lambs were born tiny (like mice) and pink. And that I struggled to save them, but they were too small to feed. The lamb today was small and pink, its fleece plastered against its body, thin and sparse. For a moment it was nightmareishly like my dream... This is my first animal death. The beginning of a long cycle. It seems even harder to have death come before life, than to have an old one die giving birth. Hopes for the future stillborn.

Driving home today, I suddenly realized that this really is going to be a sheep ranch, that I have done, and am doing, and will do it. That I'm making my livelihood from the land. The canyon is fenced now. There are sheep out there on pastures that were open hillsides two years ago.

The very act of building this place, the simple actions of tamping dirt, stretching wire, dumping hay in feeders, has profoundly changed my sense of self. I'm doing things I never dreamed I could do, and I'm doing them easily without even considering whether I really can. Last night I was talking with Susan about fencing the front meadow for feeder calves, and I realized that I could say that realistically, no fantasizing, no bragging: I can fence the front meadow as soon as I get done with the hay barn and get a little more money.

Like almost every other farmer in America today, I'm in debt and hoping for a good season. I'm only at the beginning now, and I know there are many struggles to come and overcome and come again: Someday I too, like my neighbours, will be counting carcasses killed by a marauding dog or watching the spring oats be wash away in an "unheard of" late storm. No matter how prepared I am, there us always that vulnerability - to the weather, other animals, disease - that seems to strike when things are finally going smoothly. But inside me there is also this incredible joy: This life is real and good, and it has made me strong and real and good too.

I gotta stop or I'll type the whole book into this post. One more:

My father is here this week ... working on the truck whose engine has been alien to me. I am learning now what I could have learned at 7, 11, 15. Beneath my truck, side by side, lie his seven-year-old son and his twenty-five-year-old daughter, both of us learning for the first time how bearings fit together, how to remove pistons. And here beneath this truck the patriarchy stops: he has passed his knowledge to his daughter, and from me it will pass to sisters, from sister to sister to sister.

That's this book. The things women weren't supposed to know in the sixties. They found people to teach them; they taught each other; they learned through bitter loss. The book says: we have gone before you and you are not alone. Here is what we have learned, and here is how we have learned it. We have failed, and we have wept, and we have gotten up and gone on, and it was alright. Here is the fire, passed from hand to hand to hand. Here is the light that will never be put out.

The week after we first got goats, we received a package in the mail from my coolest relative, a veterinarian who was the first woman to graduate with a specialization in large animal medicine at her school. People thought that women just weren't physically capable of handling large animals. (Hint: the bull weights 1100 kilograms. It doesn't much matter if the veterinarian weighs 50 kilograms or 150 kilograms.) I remember staying with her a child, in summer, laying on the stainless steel operating table in the barn; it always felt cool when the heat was unbearable.

The package, of course, contained Country Women. An old well-loved copy, with notes on long-ago calving dates penciled in the margins, and random scraps of paper with sketches of possible gardens and goat sheds as bookmarks. A light passed from hand to hand, a light that will not go out. It was like receiving a video game quest artifact.

Country Women is rooted in second wave feminism, which is not everyone's cup of tea. For something more modern and story-focussed, consider Hit By A Farm or Sheepish by Catherine Friend. These are collections of short, funny autobiographical essays about farming and relationships. Their tone is honest and wry, self-deprecating. You can see Catherine Friend's blog here and decide if you like her writing style. She wanted to call Hit By A Farm "Sheep Sex and Other Disasters" but her editor didn't think it would sell.

In Hit By A Farm, Catherine - a professional writer - goes along with her partner Melissa's lifelong desire to ranch sheep, and describes the results from the perspective of the slightly reluctant farmer's wife as they start a farm in Minnesota. Sheepish is written fifteen years later, when they're thinking about quitting the farm, after all the shiny newness of farming and the relationship has worn off. There are different mistakes then, different sorrows, and new joys.

From Sheepish:

We rarely pay attention to middles. Perhaps we ignore them because they're problematic. The middles of our beds often sag. The middles of our bodies sag. The middle of a long story told by your brother-in-law is likely to sag, and so you'll need another beer to stay focused. Everyone needs a reason to keep going when they're in the middle.

And:

Don't expect a farm to fix your life, for once the romance dims, you must still muck out the barn and stack hay bales and give that sick goat an enema...Although there are tons of stories about starting something new, there just aren't that many about how to keep doing something, about how to slog through the middle when the going gets tough.

The quotes are all from Sheepish; I can't find our copy of Hit By A Farm:

My spinning wheel continues to torture and confound me. I realize I'm not interested enough in the craft to really commit to learning it. After a few more tries, I tuck the wheel into a corner of our living room and turn it into what Melissa likes to call a Dust Accumulation Research Project. Clearly our wool market will continue to be the wildly unlucrative wholesale warehouse.

The patron saint of spinners is, interestingly enough, Saint Catherine. She was a Christian martyr in Alexandria. In 307 AD, she was condemned to be torn apart by the spokes of the wheel.

Well. No wonder.

Spoiler: things get pretty rough, there’s illness and hard winters and financial issues, but they do not, in fact, give up the farm or each other.

The book says: We made it. You will too.

#the-revolution-will-be-feminized

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regulusblacksdiery · 4 years ago

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I just want to say something...

So I just wanted to address a couple of comments/messages/asks I’ve received recently. This is by no means aimed at anyone in particular, I just kind of wanted to explain a little bit about how this blog works.

I’ve had a few people comment on how “unrealistic” this story is and how “this doesn’t fit with canon events” and this is “historically incorrect” for the HP timeline etc.

I just want to clarify that this story is pretty much a fanfiction, just not in the usual fanfiction format. Instead of it being in chapters posted on AO3, it’s posted in short snippets as Tumblr posts. But I reiterate - it’s fanfiction. Things are allowed to differ from canon.

This story in particular is based off of my very in-depth headcanon for the Marauder’s Era characters - most of which was established in my old (sadly deactivated) blog called Marauder-Texts. I’m going to write the story the way I picture it in my head, and while I definitely do throw in some canon events (sometimes they happen in different ways to canon), this is ultimately an AU.

Also Regulus is gay in this story. He doesn’t realise that yet (bless his little soul), but this is 100% where the story is going. And if that is something you aren’t comfortable with or you feel you don’t want to read then unfortunately this story might not be for you.

While we’re on the topic of LGBTQ+, I also want to clarify that this story definitely has an excessive amount of LGBTQ+ characters, like every other character is gay or bi or whatever, and I know this is unrealistic but that’s just how I intend to write it. In this universe apparently it’s extremely common to be LGBTQ+ and nobody will think twice about it. That’s just how I roll 😎

Other people have made comments about random things in the plotline that just don’t follow canon and I just want to say, I know, but this is how I want to write it. For example:

On this blog Lockhart started Hogwarts the same year as Regulus and in canon he starts Hogwarts a few years after Regulus.

On this blog Barty’s mother passed away when he was a child but in canon she was the one who took his place in Azkaban so he could escape.

On this blog Antonin Dolohov is in the same year as Regulus, but in canon I’m pretty sure I read he’d be like 15 years older than Regulus and most likely went to Durmstrang school (I could be wrong) - this one wasn’t exactly my choice but I made this mistake back on Marauder-Texts but by the time I realised my mistake, I’d built such a strong characterisation for him in my head that now I can’t NOT keep my headcanon for him, so hence he’s in Regulus’s year in this story too.

I’m sure there are many many other things in this story that won’t make sense canonically and may seem far-fetched to some people, and if that isn’t your cup of tea then please feel free to unfollow me (I won’t take any offence) because you probably won’t get much out of reading my posts.

Just one more thing I’d like to mention is that you’ll probably see some ships on this blog that you’ve never really seen before. Some pretty out-there ships, too, so just be warned and if you can, keep an open mind and follow the full story so you understand the context before leaving comments about how unrealistic it might be.

Anyway, I know this sounded like a rant and I promise it isn’t but I’ve wanted to say all of this for a long time and I just decided to get it all out there today for you guys.

If you have any questions about the story/questions for me in general then feel free to drop me an ask!

Thanks again everyone for all the likes, reblogs, follows and comments on my blog. I’ve said it before but this is a side-blog so I can’t reply to things but I love and appreciate all of you so much 💚

#PSA #announcement #Regulus Black

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szecretary · 3 years ago

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info about my blog under the cut, if you’re the kind of person that needs to know. have a nice day 💜

non-exhaustive list of obsessions: avatar the last airbender, legend of korra, the kyoshi novels, voltron: legendary defender, the camp half-blood chronicles, the all for the game series (and anything that is to my fancy at any moment.)

about me and my blog.

you can call me kay ✨

i am on ao3 as kuarahy. i've only written for two fandoms so far.

english and spanish, mostly english unless necessary.

i spend a lot of time analyzing canonical aspects of the shows i watch, trying to figure out why they resonate with me. i also like exploring fan-generated ideas that could fit in there and make sense in context.

i studied literature for a bit and never got over it, you can expect a lot of overly enthusiastic rambling from me because of this. i have a passion for storytelling and literary theory, but i am not an expert on anything i talk about.

i’m here to talk about things that make me happy, and i value respectful discussions about the less-than-perfect aspects of the content i consume, so if you’re of the Everything Wrong With school of media criticism, then this is not the place for you.

fandom stuff.

i love ATLA and TLOK equally.

i’ve read a fair share atla/tlok comics and consider them all canon, if you like to pretend they don’t exist, this isn’t the blog of you, friend!

i REALLY like the kyoshi novels. i’d give f.c yee a hug if i could.

i unironically like all 8 seasons of VLD and i still find many positive aspects even with the mess they made. yes i will still praise these positive aspects. no i don’t care about the ship wars.

ocassional marvel/percy jackson/hadestown posting.

i have most harry potter/marauders and related content tags blocked. i am slowly going back to this childhood interest but i don't wanna be overly exposed to it just yet. i am curating my own experience, but this doesn't mean i'll be upset if people i follow don't tag things properly. this applies to every piece of media i consume.

a very recent obsession of mine is the all for the game series, i try to be good at tagging but i'm not always successful, and this series has a lot of triggering content embedded into it. please be careful when navigating my ramblings about it.

on shipping.

you will notice that i post about various ships in my blog. this might seem strange if you’re used to people only blogging about their otp to the point of making their “rival ship/notp” a dni criteria. this does not happen here. i don’t mind shipping, i think it's fun, and i will even reblog shippy fanart, mostly because i’m a sucker for romance and pretty art. that is the extent of my enjoyment of most ships, both canon and noncanon. i like romance, and it’s fun to read and write idiots falling in love in different ways and worlds, but it's never too serious for me.

my love: [ insert phrase ] tags are for all kinds of relationships, not just romantic ones.

i don’t take shipping seriously enough to entertain discourse about it. these characters are paper dolls to me. idk how else to make this more clear, do not come here to argue about ships or how or why some might be the worst thing to exist on this planet since global warming. i am a grown adult who knows how to discern reality from fiction. i've got a job and other stuff to worry about, DO NOT even try.

anti behavior of any kind is a bad investment of your time, pal.

my url is a play on szeto and secretary, because i’m a tired college student and he’s the closest thing to that, as the only nerd avatar we know of.

that’s all~ if you want to be mutuals and even friends, my inbox is always there.

#about me #sze.log

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pellucidity-is-me · 3 years ago

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On Comparing Two Werewolves

Summary: Another scene from my fanfic (link in blog description) that can work as a one-shot. Dumbledore returns to his office the night before Halloween, argues with a few portraits about Remus Lupin’s place in Hogwarts, and decides to take a closer look on his own past with Fenrir Greyback.

Wordcount: 4396

Dumbledore returned to his office, humming Benny Goodman's Sing, Sing, Sing. He looked around and smiled at all the decorations on his walls. The group of Gryffindor boys calling themselves the “Marauders” had snuck into his office and decorated it as a little Halloween practical joke. It was very advanced magic (highly impressive for first-years), and it would have fooled anyone else. But not Dumbledore—and he was going to let the prank play out. It was harmless, after all.

Dumbledore removed the portrait-coverings from the walls. The portraits found it terribly annoying to be covered up like that, and Dumbledore did like having their input... most of the time. However, many of them held very hostile beliefs towards werewolves, and Dumbledore didn't want Remus to hear any of it. Remus had, of course, probably heard it all already. But the boy was eleven years old, and Dumbledore wanted to let him be a child as long as he could.

Even if it meant having his office expertly decorated for Halloween.

Especially if it meant having his office expertly decorated for Halloween.

"They've decorated your office," Eupraxia Mole said sternly from her portrait-frame. "A couple of boys. I think there were three. One of them was the werewolf." Dumbledore noticed the contempt with which she said the word and raised an eyebrow.

"I am aware, Eupraxia. And I do not see it fit to discriminate against Remus when you are quite literally a portrait. You're not even a living being, and I do not need to argue with you."

"The audacity!"

"I'd say you weren't fit to run this school if you weren't the best Headmaster we've ever had," said Everard, twirling his moustache. "I trust your judgement, even though I do not trust the boy."

"Thank you, Everard."

"I was a Healer before I was Headmistress, you know," said Dilys. "I've healed a few, and they are not completely ill-mannered, to my knowledge. Most of them seem to be normal at first. It is society, I believe, that drives them to be the monsters that we believe them to be. Watch him carefully, Albus. It is still possible that he will go down that path."

"Very insightful, Dilys."

"Half-breed, that's all he is," said Dexter Fortescue. "They all end up the same! Why you would put the school in danger by allowing him in, I have no idea! You ought to just put a stop to this nonsense and put him out!"

"You've heard our conversations, Dexter. He is no more dangerous than you or I."

"Whiny, snivelling little brat if you ask me," said Phineas Nigellus Black. "Doesn't seem to pose much of a threat. It's Sirius Black I'm worried about. I would recognize his voice anywhere, and this hijink will be reported directly to his mother. If he were anyone else then it would be acceptable. But he has a responsibility, as heir, to act his age. I've heard Walburga rant about him—he's a Gryffindor."

"No harm done, Phineas. I find him to be a bright and entertaining boy, myself."

"Of course you would," said Phineas snidely. "You let a literal monster into Hogwarts. That never would have been done in my day. It wouldn't have been done in anyone's day. There's a reason it's never been done before."

"Remus is an eleven-year-old boy. There is no reason to be afraid of an eleven-year-old boy."

"How do you know he's not a senseless monster? You have no proof," Euphraxia argued.

"Monsters are not pleasant, clever, kind, and mild-mannered," said Dumbledore evenly. He was getting a bit frustrated now. It should be such a small thing, letting a werewolf into Hogwarts. The portraits only disliked the idea of it because it had never been done before. It was difficult to talk with paintings that were stuck in the past, could not grow, and could not mature. Dumbledore again wondered why he was doing it.

"He's faking it." Euphraxia blew out a puff of air and let her portrait-y lips flap a little. "I can't believe you can't tell. He's not a normal eleven-year-old; he is a monster assuming the shape of an eleven-year-old, pretending to act as any other child would. It's obvious, Albus, that he's lying. You saw. He nearly lost control that one time. Had to stop, breathe, and take up his façade again. Remember?"

"He was stressed. I would have stopped to take a breather, myself. And, forgive me for saying so, but I excel at reading people. He is not pretending to be a person." Really. The notion was ridiculous. Remus was good at a great many things, but pretending to be a person for six and a half years was not something that he could do. It wasn't something that anyone could do.

"Don't get defensive, Albus," said Dilys. "We are only trying to protect the school. That is our duty, after all. I am inclined to agree with you, but I would be cautious if I were you."

"Thank you, Dilys. I accidentally allowed myself to forget that you are only portraits, and that I cannot easily change the mind of a painted inanimate object."

"I had no idea that you were so irresponsible," said Phineas, "letting my descendant go bad like that."

"What was I meant to do?"

"Re-sort him. Put him in Slytherin. That House will lead him right."

"The Sorting Hat does not agree."

"You mean the inanimate talking hat?"

"I see you've heard of it."

"This school is going to go up in flames!" Dexter continued. "A werewolf running rampant in a school full of children! I may be a portrait, but I've heard of the deeds of Fenrir Greyback! Mark my words, that boy will go bad!"

Armando Dippet cut in for the first time. "I remember Fenrir. I taught him, though he didn't go by the surname 'Greyback' at the time. You taught him, too, Albus. Quiet. Soft-spoken. Like the Lupin boy."

"Not all quiet teenagers are the same person, Armando."

"I know, I know. But I see my colleagues' point. I never would have imagined Fenrir to grow up the way he did. Something snapped, Albus. Something changed. He wasn't the same after being bitten."

"He became bitter because of a tragic event. I can't see Remus taking that route."

"And I couldn't see Fenrir doing it, either. I advocate for equality, of course. But I don't think you should have let Lupin into the school."

"And you," said Dumbledore, picking up his quill, "are only a portrait. I do not wish to discuss this any further. I make the decisions. You have all made your opinions clear, but my say is final. Sirius Black is a Gryffindor, and Remus Lupin is a Hogwarts student. And remember: you all are sworn to secrecy about his condition."

"Condition!" scoffed Dexter. "What a euphemism! It's not a condition, nor is it a sickness... it's a way of life! It's a species!"

Dumbledore closed Dexter's portrait with a snap. "I would like some peace and quiet. Do not make me permanently remove your portraits from my office."

The portraits were quiet (most of them even left their frames, perhaps to sulk somewhere else), and Dumbledore finished composing a letter to the Minister. But something niggled in the back of his head. He remembered Fenrir, of course. He had gone to Hogwarts. He had been human at the time. But what had he been like? He had seemed like a normal student. Dumbledore had never paid much attention to him.

Dumbledore rifled through his bottles of memories and found what he was looking for. He poured it into the Pensieve and entered the memory of one of his classes. Fenrir Greyback was sitting at a desk, his head bowed over a book and his fingers tapping on the desk impatiently. Dumbledore bent next to him and tried to remember.

It was almost unnatural to watch this boy—whose face was now constantly in the Daily Prophet—who was now one of the most feared people on earth. He looked so young and innocent: he was hardly the same person. It was no wonder that no one ever recognized him after he went bad. Dumbledore himself hadn't believed it; when the name Fenrir Greyback had become popular amongst fearful wizardkind, Dumbledore had thought that it was simply someone with the same first name. After all, he'd taught multiple Fenrirs. He'd even entertained the notion that the name was completely fake, or that he hadn't taught Greyback at all... he'd never once made the connection until he had seen that 1965 photograph of the man, and it was hard to believe even then.

Dumbledore studied the young Greyback's face, but could find no trace of Remus Lupin in his eyes. He simply looked bored, and Dumbledore could hardly fault anyone for being so in the middle of Transfiguration class.

Fenrir was quiet. Hardly ever spoke at all, in fact. He didn't spend any time around peers in his own House—he spent more time with the Gryffindors, in fact, than anyone else. Fenrir's chosen company reminded Dumbledore of James and Sirius, in fact. But he was always an add-on; someone who never had nor was ever considered a "best friend". He was just... there. Quiet. He reminded Dumbledore more of Peter Pettigrew than Remus Lupin, if Dumbledore was being honest with himself.

Dumbledore could hardly see the current Fenrir Greyback in the boy's appearance: the man who had grown out his nails and hair, who had embraced his condition and used it to become more wolf-like and intimidating. This eleven-year-old boy looked... sweet. Happy. Had he changed? The boy stood up and walked over to young-Dumbledore after class ended. Dumbledore only had to search the depths of his brilliant memory for a moment before he remembered this conversation.

"Professor Dumbledore," said the young Fenrir Greyback, his eyes bright. "I forgot to do my homework again."

"And what were you doing instead, Fenrir?" It was always so unnatural, hearing his own voice in a memory.

"I was... er."

"Yes?"

"I dunno, sir. Sleeping. Reading. Outside. I just didn't feel like doing it."

"First year is an excellent time to start applying yourself, Fenrir. Habits are formed when you are still young. Do you realize that you have not turned in a single homework assignment since school began?"

"Yes, sir."

"Why are you here?"

"Sorry, sir?"

"Why are you at Hogwarts, if you are intent on shirking your responsibilities?"

"It's not like I'm not learning the spells. I can perform them. I just don't want to do the written homework." Now, that sentiment reminded Dumbledore of those of James Potter and Sirius Black. But still not Remus.

"Which will help the spells to stay in your long-term memory," Memory-Dumbledore said. “We teachers rather know what we are doing."

The memory faded and reformed, and Fenrir was now in third year. Dumbledore looked on as Fenrir spoke to Armando Dippet, who looked thoroughly frustrated with the child.

"Fenrir," said Dippet, not unkindly, "You are still refusing to apply yourself. What do you plan on doing after Hogwarts?"

"Don't know, sir," Fenrir said dismissively, "and I don't care. I'm meant to be doing something more than sitting still and doing homework."

Dumbledore was almost amused despite himself. Well, that ended up happening, didn't it?

The memory shifted again, and Fenrir was laughing with his friends... running and chasing them around the Hogwarts grounds... playing catch and Exploding Snap.

All monsters had started out as boys and girls, hadn't they?

Dumbledore remembered a little more of Fenrir now. He hadn't been able to sit still for the life of him. He used to tap the desk with his fingers so loudly that the children sitting next to him would be driven to madness. He held grudges. He had gotten good enough grades, but only ever ended up doing enough homework to squeak by when exams rolled around. He had been innately interested in Defense Against the Dark Arts and was a decent duellist.

Dumbledore could see some traits in Fenrir that might have contributed to his current state. He was resourceful and cunning, yet didn't often think before he acted and was wont to give into current desires rather than make future investments. He seemed to value a "pack" setting—he was fiercely loyal to those he cared about and didn't seem to care whether anybody else lived or died. He didn't seem to show much empathy, save to a few of his closest friends, but he didn't exhibit a lack of empathy either. He was just... there. A student.

Could Dumbledore imagine him going bad? Sure. But people went bad all the time. Anyone had the potential to go bad; it was only a matter of choice.

This boy had been bitten by a monster shortly after leaving Hogwarts (according to Dumbledore's recent calculations), was shunned by the wizarding community, went through unimaginable pain every month, and had eventually decided to look after his own desires rather than the needs of others. Dumbledore could see him doing that. He could see many people going down that route.

But while Fenrir had been self-centered because of his condition, Remus remained others-centered.

No, that wasn't quite right in all respects. It was right in hardly any respects, actually. Fenrir had focused on others as the object of his hate. Remus had focused on himself. Remus never got angry with others for his suffering—not for long. He seemed to quite loathe himself on occasion, but almost never others. Remus was always focusing on himself, it seemed: he pitied himself, blamed himself, and overall thought about his own troubles quite a lot. It wasn't always a strength, but it was undeniably Remus.

Fenrir, alternatively, considered himself better than others—with or without the lycanthropy. Remus considered others to be better then himself because of the lycanthropy. Funny how that worked out.

They were different people, Dumbledore deduced. Greyback was a monster. Remus was not.

He had already known that, of course. And he was thankful for it.

But looking into Fenrir's young eyes, so full of life and energy, he couldn't help thinking of Remus'—the dead opposite. Remus always had a tired look to him, looked so much older than he really was, was much too mature, and had grown up before his time. Why did Greyback get a childhood and Remus did not?

So was the mystery of the universe.

Dumbledore resolved, then and there, that he would never let Remus Lupin go bad. He had allowed Grindelwald to do so in his childhood. He had already made the mistake of letting someone's faults take over until that person was no longer who they once were. He would not let the same thing come to Remus. He was going to invade the inner workings of the universe and fix things—that was his responsibility as someone who was both powerful and intelligent. Dumbledore knew how to fix things, and he was going to do it. He simply couldn't sit idly by and watch Remus' world burn.

But Remus didn't really need his help, did he?

He returned to his office, where all the portraits were sleeping—with the exception of Armando.

"Greyback, hm?" Armando asked. "Have you considered?"

"I have. My mind has not changed."

Armando chuckled. "Albus Dumbledore, changing his mind. That will happen the day that a Welsh Green becomes Minister for Magic."

"On this matter?" Dumbledore said. "Not even then."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There was one more memory that Dumbledore wanted to view, but he waited until all of the portraits were sleeping. He fished the vial out of the cabinet and poured it into the Pensieve, slightly dreading it. But it was perfect for Halloween, wasn't it?

And then there he was. That night that he had been out on the streets, walking on the cobblestones and singing to himself, enjoying the cool air and the streetlamps. His hair had been a little darker then, and his eyes a little brighter. It was only about five years ago, but it felt like an eternity.

Fenrir had been a werewolf now for... let's see, if he was eleven in 1948, and bitten at age eighteen, and now it was 1966, and he was about twenty-nine now... eleven years. Less than twice the amount of time that Remus had been a werewolf: present-day Remus had been a werewolf for six and a half. But Dumbledore didn't want to compare the two more than what was necessary, though he knew that it was inevitable.

Dumbledore saw his memory-self pause and look around. When Dumbledore heard a strange sound and he couldn't tell where it was coming from, he had a ritual of sorts. First, he would look up, because that's what the average person would least expect. Then he would look down. Then he would look to his left, because he was right-handed. Then he would look to his right. He watched his memory-self do all of this, and when he was doing the final step—spinning in a circle—he noticed the source of the sound.

It was Fenrir, of course, shrouded in a black cloak that was so ripped it barely covered him. Memory-Dumbledore did not recognize him at first. "Hello?" he said, drawing nearer. It wasn't until the thing looked up and met Memory-Dumbledore's eyes that he realized. Memory-Dumbledore recognized Fenrir's image from the papers, so he drew his wand and trained it on the creature, ready to attack if need be. "Fenrir. Fancy meeting you here."

Fenrir smiled, and both Dumbledores noticed his teeth—sharp, pointed, and stained with red... Very Halloween-y, thought Dumbledore, and also mildly disturbing.

"What are you doing out here, Fenrir? Do you need assistance in getting somewhere? Azkaban, perhaps?" Memory-Dumbledore pretended that he was not repulsed. Memory-Dumbledore imagined that it was only tomato juice or something on his teeth. Even Memory-Dumbledore, though, knew that this wasn't the case.

"Dumbledore. Long time no see." Fenrir wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. His eyes were not those of the eleven-year-old boy at all. They were more dangerous. They were bloodshot. They were narrowed. Wolf-like was the first word that came to mind. Dumbledore's eyes drew to Fenrir's hand, which sported long, curled nails. He realized with a jolt that Fenrir had bitten Remus Lupin only about a year prior.

"You look a little worse-for-wear, Fenrir," said Memory-Dumbledore. "I deeply sympathize." Memory-Dumbledore did not yet know the extent of Fenrir's exploits. He remembered still the young Fenrir, full of life and a deep desire to do the right thing... Memory-Dumbledore had stupidly believed that he could somehow turn Fenrir to his own side, even though he'd been Voldemort's weapon for years now.

"You can't sympathize," said Fenrir. His voice was deep, gravelly, and scratchy, almost like a sinister record-player. He pronounced his R's in the back of his throat and ended his sentences a bit abruptly. How had his voice changed so much in a few short years? Remus' voice sounded nothing like that, so it had nothing to do with the lycanthropy. But Clark Darnall pronounced his R's that way—had Clark picked it up from Greyback or had they both gotten it from another place? "You can't sympathize," said Fenrir again. "You have no idea what I've been through."

Memory-Dumbledore, indeed, did not know. But current Dumbledore had an idea.

"I'm sorry, Fenrir. Is there anything I can do?"

"'Course not. It's not a problem anymore. I made the best of it. Made do with what I had. You know how it is."

"Hm. Have you been hurting anyone?" Memory-Dumbledore's hand twitched on his wand, knowing the answer—but he wanted to hear Greyback say it; perhaps, he thought, it would drive the man to conviction....

Fenrir was quick to confirm, and there was no guilt in his voice. "No more than they've hurt me. You've heard the stories, haven't you? You know what I've done."

Memory-Dumbledore looked at him intensely. "Fenrir," he said, "I am a very powerful wizard, you know, and I will not stand for that." Fenrir eyed Dumbledore's wand warily, but Dumbledore was not budging. "There is a way out, you know... we can keep you safe on the full moons. You are infamous for attacking children, my friend—but it's not too late to step away from all that... you'll have to pay for your crimes, of course, but we can keep you hidden from the higher-ups at the Ministry, who no doubt want to execute you. You're not trapped in this lifestyle."

Memory-Dumbledore had suspected that some of the rumors about Fenrir were unfounded, but he'd been wrong. He'd felt sympathy for the boy who had attended Hogwarts not too long ago, but he'd been wrong. Clark Darnall was in Dumbledore's ranks, and he'd warned Dumbledore of the horrific acts that Fenrir had committed... he'd already spoken to Dumbledore about Remus at this point. But Dumbledore had still thought, somewhere, deep down, that Fenrir could not have changed so much from when he was a boy—that he was only evil because he had not been given a proper choice—and Dumbledore had known that, if he could convince Fenrir, then he'd automatically have all of the werewolves in Britain on his side... countless lives could be saved.

Dumbledore was a brilliant man, yes, but he was sometimes incorrect. This was one of those times.

"Dumbledore. You know me; you taught me. Do you really think that it's so easy to convince me? You underestimate me—I wouldn't leave behind all that I've built, not for the misguided lie that there's a place for me amo-" Crack. Fenrir had, intelligently enough, Apparated away in the middle of his sentence. Nay, the middle of a word. Memory-Dumbledore had not seen it coming, and that was a rare occurrence.

Memory-Dumbledore marveled at the boy's—no, the man's—no, the monster's cleverness, and resolved to keep an eye out and figure out what he was up to before he could hurt more people. It wouldn't be that difficult. Memory-Dumbledore was already, so to speak, following the scent, and he was sure that he would have plenty more chances to apprehend the werewolf. Memory-Dumbledore walked away, less of a spring in his step, but confident and relaxed.

Current Dumbledore made his way over to the place in which his memory-self had once stood and peered down the alleyway where Greyback had been standing. A dead rabbit, still warm-looking and covered in blood, lay on the ground.

Dumbledore's stomach roiled a bit, but at least it wasn't a toddler.

With that comforting thought in mind, Dumbledore removed himself from the memory, sat down on an armchair, and opened a book.

He did not read it, though. His eyes skimmed over the words and his hand idly flipped pages, but his mind was back in the alley, watching the boy-become-monster.

The pieces clicked together in a way that they were wont to do in Dumbledore's keen mind. They were pieces that had come together in the past, yes, but now they did so even more securely.

Ten years after Fenrir was bitten, at age twenty-eight, he had attacked Remus. And he'd been savage for a long time before that. Remus had been a werewolf now for six and a half years: when Fenrir had been a werewolf for six and a half years, he had probably already begun attacking people.

The portraits had been wrong, obviously, and this proved it. But now Dumbledore thought about why.

It wasn't because Remus was a better person than Fenrir (though that was undoubtedly the case). It wasn't because he had somehow escaped whatever disease had made Fenrir go bad. It wasn't because the lycanthropy somehow affected him differently. So why had they turned out differently?

A mixture of personal choice and better circumstances, Dumbledore decided.

Remus was doing so well because he had such good parents—who had taught him right from wrong, who had spent time with him, who had loved him unconditionally. He would be further shaped by his professors and friends. He would learn, he would grow, and he would continue to live in human society—as he had done for his whole life. He'd made a choice early on to be this way, and now his choices were manifesting themselves in his personality. That was what made a person human (in the abstract sense of the word), not a species.

It was likely that Fenrir had not had systems of support like Remus did. That didn't force him to become what he was, of course, but it made it much more difficult. And then Fenrir had made a choice to do this—to give in to things that he knew were wrong—to let the worst parts of him invade his life and personality—thus Fenrir Greyback was born. Would things have gone differently if his parents had loved him unconditionally? Had they? What if Fenrir had still been in school (though Dumbledore knew that Dippet would not have allowed that)?

But one thing was for certain: it had nothing to do with lycanthropy. It was not biological. It, like many other things, was a matter of choice. It was one’s choices, after all, that showed one who they truly were—far more than their abilities.

And that was why Sirius Black, who had grown up a descendant of Phineas Nigellus, was a Gryffindor. That was why James Potter, who loved everything Gryffindor, was a Gryffindor. That was why Peter Pettigrew had chosen friends that did not match him in either ability or personality. It was all personal choice applied to surroundings: it wasn't even werewolf-specific. No one was biologically a monster.

Dumbledore had already known all that, but it was nice to put it into words.

Everyone starts out as children, he mused as he fiddled with a Disillusioned bat decoration hanging off the wall.

And as the memories replayed themselves in Dumbledore's mind well into the night, he meditated once again on the fact that having such a brilliant mind and a tendency to stick his nose in other people's business was both a blessing and a curse.

#albus dumbledore #fenrir greyback #remus lupin #fanfiction #marauders era #character study #cool little chapter i wrote #halloween

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ughgclden · 3 years ago

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ahhh congrats on 900 lovely!! may i get a 🎞 for dps or hp pls? i have ~wavy~ shoulder length dark brown hair and i do that annoying little thing where you put on blush to make it look like a sunburn, that mainly covers my freckles. cher horowitz & jackie burkhart are the blueprint when i dress and sometimes my friends make fun of me and call me the pink character :/ i’m passionate about musical theatre, and go to a performing arts school for such and such reason. i also really enjoy baking, doodling, archery. my personality could be described as very warm mom friend who holds ur hand when we cross the street, and worries about you after school type beat. lily evans kinnie :( i’m very loyal, and opinionated and i can be stubborn at times ( all the time babe :( ) thank you so much, and congrats again on a very well deserved 900!!! 💕

ahh thanks so so much lovely !!! of course,, i'll do both bcos i'm a fiend and love writing these things - i hope u like them !!! thanks sm for sending something in <333 i apologise about how long this is - i started writing the dps one completely forgetting i was also doing the hp one,, i have no impulse control

if you were in dead poets society..

i think the first poet you'd meet would be neil! as you're extremely passionate for musical theatre and have a talent for the performing arts, it's not surprising when you end up in a production with him. thanks to your warm personality and neil's extroverted nature and desire to make friends, it doesn't take long for you both to become friendly. he really appreciates your support and help, due to his problems with his dad and such, and thinks you give the most perfect advice. by opening night, you guys are great friends, and he's told you all about the poets who are coming along to watch him and how they'll love you. and he was definitely right, because when mr todd anderson spots you on stage, the lights hitting you just right to where you look like you're glowing, acting like it's second nature to you, his mind goes into overdrive.

after the show, he nervously asks neil about you, trying to act casual, but neil can read him like a book and instantly realises that he has a crush. he invites you over to meet his friends, paying a little extra attention to todd when he introduces the two of you. because he's a devil, he proposes that the poets and you and your friends who've come to support you all go out together - there's a local diner not too far from here that you could all head to at the weekend. everyone thinks this is a great idea, and todd is ready to kill neil. so when the weekend rolls around and you show up, he thinks you're the prettiest person he's seen, the blush on your nose adding to your overall angelic look.

it goes without saying that charlie LOVES your outfits so much - he thinks you have incredible style, and will compliment at least one of your clothing items each and every time he sees you. he will be your main hype man okay. he also definitely wants to do archery with you, because he thinks it's so so badass and he won't turn down an opportunity to add to his self proclaimed coolness.

i also think you'd get on so well with pitts - mom friends stick together, and pitts is definitely a mom friend. you're both the impulse control from the poets, having to convince charlie or knox that their 'genius' ideas are not that genius at all. the fact that you're super loyal is something all of the poets admire - they know they've found a good friend in you, and can always rely on you if they need to.

and when they find out you can bake? oh god, it's chaos. with this new found knowledge, they now desperately want to bake with you and you and pitts have to try and wrangle these overly excited boys so you can make something actually edible.

if you were in harry potter...

again, thanks to your warm nature, people are just drawn to you, so i think you'd get on well with practically everyone at hogwarts. you'd definitely be approached by a lot of the younger students who are nervous or lost, as you look approachable and kind, not intimidating like other students who tower over them and push them in the corridors.

i think you'd be closest to ginny, neville and luna. luna thinks your hair is super pretty, and is constantly placing flowers in it, sometimes even braiding them into the strands if she has time. you and ginny are both stubborn, loyal and opinionated, so you get on extremely well on that front, both enjoying sticking by your friends and standing up for yourself and what you think is right. neville loves seeing your doodles, please slide some towards him during class, it makes them more bearable for him. i can also see you being good friends with angelina johnson!

due to your friendship with angelina, it isn't long before a certain red-head starts catching feelings for you. it's george, i'm talking about george. listen, he just thinks you're super sweet, and he adores your fashion and freckles. plus, with your mom friend attitude and general care for people, how could he not begin falling for you?

BUT if we're talking the marauders era, it's only fitting you're best friends with lily, marlene, dorcas and mary. oh my god, you'd be the most iconic friendship group that everyone else would be jealous of. i'm talking late night karaoke sessions, a silencing charm cast on your dorm to avoid waking up your fellow classmates. there'd be so many hogsmeade outings, wandering around all of the different shops and just enjoying being in each other's company.

i definitely think remus would have the biggest crush on you. he isn't really sure when it started. he just remembers waking up one day with the knowledge that he likes you, and that was that. he'd be a bit apprehensive to make a move, not knowing if you reciprocate his feelings. but if you show any indication? he's jumping at the chance to ask you out

i hope these were okay babe!! like i said, im so sorry about how long they got, i've had a lot of coffee and i'm a menace when it comes to these things- but i truly hope you like them !!! thanks for sending something in, i adore your blog and the fact we're mutuals is mind-blowing <33

#ughgclden's 900 follower celebration

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fanfics4all · 4 years ago

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Wing Man

Request: Yes / No Could you possibly do a Draco Malfoy X fem ravenclaw reader (platonic,just friends) were nobody understands their relationship, their just both sarcastic and hilarious together and she brings the good side out of him. Could it be an AU where Voldemort never existed but Draco is still a bit of a git as well? Their just each other’s wing mans and the reader helps him admit his feelings for Harry (sorry I’m a huge Drarry Shipper lol). Maybe the Marauders could be teachers their (besides Peter).Ty💕 Anon

Requests are open <3 Have a nice day/night

Draco Malfoy x Best Friend!Fem!Reader

Word count: 577

Warnings: Nothing

Y/N: Your Name

Y/N/N: Your Nickname

PLEASE DO NOT STEAL MY WORK, I WORK HARD ON MY FICS AND IT’S NOT COOL TO STEAL SOMEONE ELSE’S WORK!

If you want to be on the tag list for anything (My series fics, specific character fics, or just all of them) All you have to do is send me an ask and I will add you!

Masterlist

(Not my photo, credit to whoever made it!)

Draco and I were best friends since we were little kids. Our families have been good friends since forever and it was only natural that we became friends. My parents were both Sltherin, so they figured I’d also be in Slytherin, however I was placed in Ravenclaw. I thought they would be upset, but they didn’t actually care. They said at least I wasn’t in Gryffindor. Draco also didn’t care. He would have loved if we were in the same house, but he said Ravenclaw fit me. I always had my nose in a book and Draco always said I was his little bookworm.

As our years at Hogwarts went on people started rumors that we were dating. We were in fact not dating. Draco and I were more like brother and sister, but no matter what we said, no one believed us. One day while Draco and I were hanging out, he had a look on his face that said he wanted to tell me something.

“What’s up Dra?” I asked.

“Hmm? Nothing.” He lied and I narrowed my eyes.

“Would you care to tell me the truth?” I asked and he bit his lip.

“Honestly Y/N/N, it’s nothing.” He lied again.

“Since when do you not tell me anything?” I asked and he sighed.

“You know you can’t lie to me, I’m your best friend.” I said and sat next to him.

“I-I like this boy…” He said and I smiled.

“Really? Who is it?” I asked.

“You’ll never believe me…” He said and I thought for a moment.

“Oh Merlin! You like Harry Potter!” I said with a huge smile.

“Hush Y/N!” He said and covered my mouth.

“You have to tell him!” I said quieter.

“No, he’d never believe me.” He said and I rolled my eyes.

“You just have to show him you mean it, here, practice on me.” I said and turned to face him better.

“No, this is stupid.” He said and went to get up.

“Hey, if you honestly have feelings for him then you need to prove it. Let me help you.” I said, grabbing his arm.

“Fine…” He said and sat back down, facing me.

“Alright, pretend I’m Harry.” I said and smiled at him.

“Potter… I need to talk to you…” He said and I rolled my eyes.

“Maybe call him by his name for once.” I said and He sighed.

“Fine. Harry, I need to talk to you…” He said.

“What is it, Malfoy?” I asked.

“I-I… Merlin I can’t do this!” He groaned.

“Hey, you can.” I said, placing my hand on his arm.

“Watch.

“Harry, I need to talk to you.” I said and he just stared at me.

“I know you’re not going to believe me, but I have feelings for you. You are honestly an amazing and brave person. I really do have feelings for you.” I said and he smiled. He moved some hair behind my ear and shook his head lightly.

“You are amazing Y/N/N.” He said and I smirked.

“Obviously I am.” I said and he rolled his eyes.

“And so modest.” He said and I chuckled.

“Now, you need to go and tell that boy you have feelings with him.” I said and pushed him up.

“Alright, alright.” He laughed.

“And don’t come back till you tell him.” I said and closed the door on him. Draco could be so adorable sometimes.

Tag list: @les-bio-lie @tashy-bear @ashwarren32 @hollie-blogs @schisbro87 @lover-of-books-and-teas @nerdygaloresposts @teenwolfbitches2 @genius2050 @drw0301bieber @softgamerking @lady-of-lies @ravenmoore14 @ravenempress101 @cillianchamp @rowanthomasknapp @in-slytherin-we-trust @accio-rogers @dracoswhvre

#harry potter #harry potter imagine #draco malfoy #draco x reader #draco malfoy x reader #draco x ravenclaw!reader #draco malfoy x ravenclaw!reader #draco malfoy imagine #draco x harry #draco malfoy x harry potter #ravenclaw #ravenclaw!reader #fanfic #request

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xomarauders · 4 years ago

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hello everyone,

it has been far too long since i have posted anything on here and for that i apologize, but i have been working on some of my own writing as well as just dealing with personal stuff so please forgive me.

i also might be changing this blog up a bit and start posting more than just marauders fanfiction (such as some of my own writing perhaps). i’m still not sure about this idea because i don’t really want to change my user name or anything and i do want to contiue writing fics so we’ll see!

anyway, without further ado, here is my latest fic for yall :) hope you enjoy! (p.s. there is a second part coming!!!)

tw: internalized homophobia, implied child abuse, depictions of a panic attack

The cold December air was harsh against Marlene’s skin as she stood outside the small record shop she had been frequenting since she was fourteen. It was tucked away in the side of a building in London, offering solace to those who did not seem to fit in with the more fast-paced, business-like folk you so often saw among the sidewalks. The cigarette in her hand was offering little warmth but seemed to be calming her nerves, so she stayed outside to finish smoking it. It was winter break from Hogwarts and Marlene was relieved to be away from school for the time being as well as away from her friends. She couldn’t face them at the moment. Not after what she did.

Marlene rolled her eyes at herself for thinking of things she’d rather forget and tossed the butt of her cigarette to the ground before crushing it with the toe of her combat boot. With one last glance toward the busy street, she retreated into the record shop which greeted her immediately with the chime of a bell and rock music playing throughout the speakers of the store.

A man at the register with short, dirty blonde hair and rings through his eyebrows glanced up at her entrance, a smile appearing on his face.

“Marlene! Haven’t seen you in a while.” He commented, swinging his legs over the counter and making his way toward her. Marlene gave a non-committal shrug but returned the high-five he offered her with semi frozen fingers.

“How has business been, Curtis?” She asked, glancing around the nearly empty shop. There was no one else in there aside from the two of them and Marlene felt her heart break just a little bit. This was one of her favorite places to be, a place she and her friends would escape to during the summer to be with one another. She wondered if their absence was the reason for her melancholic mood.

“It hasn’t been bad. Just caught me on a slow day.” Curtis replied, seeming to notice Marlene’s shift in behavior. “Lily was in here the other day, actually. Got herself a few new albums.”

Marlene looked up at the mention of Lily and felt her cheeks burn slightly. She wondered if Lily had mentioned anything about the incident to Curtis. Judging by the passive look on his face, she assumed not and tried to school her own expression into a neutral one.

“Yeah? What albums?”

After Curtis introduced her to the new music Lily had gotten, Marlene picked up a few albums of her own to purchase before leaving the shop to get back home. She would have stayed to visit with Curtis longer, but she didn’t want to linger in a space that reminded her so much of her friends at the moment and she especially didn’t want to run into them anytime soon.

It was a bit of a walk to the closest floo station and the London streets were bustling with people walking home from work or coming out for the night. Marlene kept her head down, staring at the pavement in front of her and wrapping her jacket tightly around herself, blocking out the bitter cold as best she could. Suddenly, a body collided against her and she fell backwards, dropping her records in the process.

“What the fu—?” Marlene was cut off by the commotion of being pulled off the sidewalk and dragged into a nearby alley way.

She looked up, ready to scream insults at her attacker, but stopped at the sight of Sirius Black’s face. His hair was tied up in a bun, though most of it seemed to have fallen out, and there was a wide look of panic in his eyes that matched the rapid rise and fall of his chest. He was trembling finely and looked ready to pass out as he glanced behind him in a paranoid manner. It seemed as though he was running from something. Or someone.

“Sirius?” Marlene asked, keeping her voice low. She turned to look in the direction where Sirius was peering and spotted two men seemingly searching the crowd. Her eyebrows raised. There was something off about the two men…they did not fit in with the rest of the crowd, the clothes they wore were different, not really matching and the confused, disgusted looks on their faces made them stick out like sore thumbs. Realization hit her like a ton of bricks—they were wizards trying to blend in with a muggle crowd. Purebloods, to be exact.

She whirled around to look at Sirius once more. “Sirius, who are those men?” She hissed, desperate to know what kind of danger they could possibly be in. Rumors about dark wizards had begun circulating around Hogwarts for months now. Followers of Voldemort that had begun to call themselves “Death Eaters” were threatening the lives of muggleborns, though Marlene had never actually seen any such wizard. Until now, she supposed.

“We’ve got to get out of here.” Sirius said, completely ignoring her question. He looked down towards the other end of the alley to see a chain link fence and cursed. They were trapped it seemed and Marlene felt herself begin to panic.

“Sirius,” She said, her voice urgent, though she wasn’t sure what she was pleading for.

He turned to her once more, gripping her shoulders tightly and staring at her intently. “I have an idea, but you have to promise me that you won’t breathe a word of this to anybody, do you understand?”

Marlene nodded and then watched with complete shock and awe as Sirius disappeared, a large, black dog appearing in his place. Animagus, she realized with a jolt. The dog turned away, walking back down the alley before turning and barking at Marlene, as if motioning for her to follow. She blinked a few times, still shocked at the sudden change of events, before following him back into the streets. He stopped where she had dropped her records and Marlene bent down to pick them up, a slight frown playing on her lips at the sight of the bent corners of the packaging. She was just about to scold Sirius when a rough voice behind her cleared their throat. She looked up, just as Sirius growled, to see the two men from earlier standing there.

The men did not seem to pay attention to the dog, focusing their gaze solely on Marlene instead. She tried to keep her face neutral, raising a single eyebrow in their direction. “Can I help you?”

“Have you seen a boy run through here?” The shorter of the two men asked, his lip curling in disgust. The other man eyed Marlene warily, taking in her muggle attire and turning his nose up at the mere sight. Marlene tried not to roll her eyes.

“No.” She replied, sounding calmer than she felt.

The two men shared a look, as if trying to decide whether or not she was telling the truth, before nodding their understanding and moving past her without another word. Marlene felt as Sirius curled around her legs, watching as they disappeared around the corner before letting out a victorious bark. She looked down at him, shaking her head.

“I suppose you need somewhere to hide for a while?”

Another yelp and wag of his tale gave Marlene all the answers she needed.

****

“Well, this is home.” Marlene said with a sigh, dropping her records onto her bed with a soft thud. Sirius—still in his canine form—sniffed around before cocking his head in her direction and allowing his tongue to roll out of his mouth. Marlene wrinkled her nose at the slobber. “I think you are safe to go back to your usual…form. Unless you’re stuck that is.”

Again, Marlene watched in amazement as Sirius came back to himself, a shiver running through his body as he grinned at her. “Nice room you’ve got, McKinnon. Am I the first boy you’ve brought home?”

“Care to explain what just happened?” She asked, not caring for the way he seemed to avoid explaining himself.

Sirius shrugged, moving toward the desk in the corner of the room and running his fingers down the various artwork Marlene had spread out there. A look of wonder shined in his eyes as he delicately examined the paintings and drawings as if they were some sort of precious treasure. He stopped at a particular piece of a woman’s face done with charcoal pencil and Marlene felt herself blush at the way he traced the strokes that molded her lips.

“These are wonderful. Who did them?”

“I did.”

Sirius turned, his eyebrows raised with surprise and admiration. “Really? I didn’t know you were an artist.”

She stood up, marching over to where he stood, and removed the drawing from his grasp, shoving it beneath the rest of the art, effectively obscuring it from his wandering eyes, before turning to face him once more.

“There’s a lot you don’t know about me, Black.”

She did not miss the way he seemed to flinch away from her before shaking it off and plastering another smirk across his face. “Touché.” He spoke quietly.

Marlene felt a jolt of guilt in her gut, feeling bad for snapping at him. He was merely admiring her work. He did not understand the context of her drawing and likely wouldn’t make the connection. Afterall, he did not live in her mind where all the confusing thoughts and doubts resided. He could not possibly know her dirty little secret.

“Just…tell me what happened back there. Do I need to be afraid that someone might follow you here?” She asked, changing the topic.

“Those were the Lestrange brothers. Rabastan and Rodolphus. Purebloods. Family friends.”

“Why were they looking for you?”

“Because I may have said something rather…deplorable at my dear cousin’s engagement party.” Sirius said it with a grin, but Marlene noticed the flicker of fear in his eyes.

Marlene vaguely knew about the Black family and the way they presented themselves. Most of her ideas about them came from the mere reactions Sirius had whenever someone brought the prestigious bloodline. He was always loud about it, shouting about how stuck up they were in the Gryffindor common room and how grateful he was that he had not followed in their footsteps and ended up in Slytherin. She also knew that they were blood purists, believing that muggles were beneath them.

From what she had gathered, she was not a fan of them.

“Is there any way they can find you here?” Marlene asked, unwilling to allow her family to become endangered for hiding a self-proclaimed fugitive. Sirius just laughed, shaking his head so that his hair flung about. Marlene would have found it amusing how much it reminded her of a dog if it were under difference circumstances.

“I doubt they would. Going into muggle London was bad enough for them, they’re not going to continue their search in a muggle neighborhood.”

Marlene did not get the chance to ask what Sirius planned to do next due to the sound of the front door opening and her family announcing their presence.

“Marls!” Her father shouted up the steps. “We’re home!”

“Come down and tell us how your trip to London was. Your brother has been pestering me all afternoon about not letting him go with you.” Her mother spoke with a laugh and Marlene heard her brother scoff indignantly.

Marlene turned to Sirius, pointing a finger at him and giving him the best glare that she could. “Be on your best behavior. Go along with everything I say, are we clear?” Sirius just nodded, unwilling to cross her and with a final nod Marlene turned to exit the room with Sirius following closely behind. As they entered the living area, Marlene watched as her brother’s eyes went wide at the sight of Sirius.

“Mum! Marlene’s brought a friend home!” He announced. The McKinnon’s turned, a look of surprise on each of their faces at the sight of the young man standing in their home. Marlene’s mother turned to her and offered a hesitant smile.

“Marlene, who’s your friend?”

“Mum, dad, this is Sirius. He goes to school with me.”

Her father instantly lit up, clasping her hands together as he plopped down on the sofa. “Another wizard! How nice to meet you, young man. I’m Grant McKinnon, but you can just call me Grant.” He offered Sirius a hand and Marlene tried her best not to smirk as Sirius suddenly stood up a bit straighter and shook her fathers’ hand as if he were meeting the Queen.

“A pleasure to meet you, sir. Lovely home you have here.”

“What a gentleman.” Her mother laughed lightly. “I’m Lottie.”

This time, Marlene had to bite her lip to keep herself from laughing as she watched Sirius gently kiss her mother’s hand. Merlin, he really was a posh bastard.

“I’m Freddie.” Her brother greeted, not wanting to be left out, and Sirius’s eyes lit up.

“Like Freddie Mercury?”

“Exactly!” Freddie exclaimed, grinning from ear to ear.

Just as Marlene was about to interrupt to give an explanation as to why Sirius was there in the first place, her family initiated a game of twenty questions directed toward the poor boy.

“So, you go to Hogwarts then?” Lottie asked, an easy smile playing on her lips. She moved to sit by her husband, smoothing out her yellow sun dress as she did so. Sirius nodded, a proud smile appearing on his face.

“Yes. Sorted into Gryffindor, just like Marlene.”

Grant leaned forward; an eyebrow raised. “That’s the one with the lion, right?”

Marlene rolled her eyes good-naturedly. “Dad, you know it is.”

Her father merely laughed, raising his hands in defense as he leaned back once more. “I just want to make sure! I never went to Hogwarts now did I?”

“Oh, did you go to Beaubaxtons?” Sirius asked and Marlene cringed.

“Oxford, actually.” Her father answered easily, and Sirius glanced at Marlene with clear confusion on his face. Grant didn’t seem to mind though, catching on to what Sirius wasn’t fully understanding. “I don’t have magic, son.”

Sirius’s eyes went wide for the hundredth time that day it seemed, and he grinned wickedly. “You’re a muggle.” He stated as if he had just made a new discovery. Marlene got the impression that Sirius had never really spoken to a muggle before now.

“You’re pureblood then, Sirius?” Marlene’s mother asked, quickly connecting the dots of Sirius’s curiosity.

“Oh. Yeah. Yeah I am.” Sirius shifted a bit uncomfortably and Lottie frowned at the sudden change in behavior.

“I was the only witch in my family.” Lottie continued, changing the subject. “Was sorted into Ravenclaw at Hogwarts.”

“That’s what I’m going to be.” Freddie piped up, puffing his chest out in perfect eight-year old fashion. Marlene rolled her eyes.

“You still have three more years and there’s no guarantee you’ll follow in mum’s footsteps.”

Freddie narrowed his eyebrows and glared at Marlene. “But I want to be a Ravenclaw.”

“You can be whatever you want to be, mate.” Sirius said solemnly and Marlene found herself surprised at the sincerity in Sirius’s voice. She had never known Sirius to behave in such ways at school, often getting into trouble and shouting about loudly and animatedly. What he said had seemed to be an acceptable answer for Freddie, though, who beamed right back at Sirius.

“Sirius needs a place to stay.” Marlene blurted suddenly, and everyone’s attention turned toward her once more. Her mother gave her a dubious look, waiting patiently for an explanation while her father seemed to not even question the notion.

“For how long?” Grant asked.

“Oh. Uh, you don’t have to do that, sir. I’ll be okay on my own.”

Lottie leaned forward, reaching out for Sirius who instantly flinched in return, causing her to draw her hands back quickly, a stunned look on her face at his reaction. She cleared her throat and fixed him with a serious look. “It’s not problem if you need somewhere to sleep, Sirius. I would just like a reason and an idea of how long you would be staying.”

Sirius glanced at Marlene hesitantly. Clearly, he had not planned on staying here but he also had not planned on going home. Had he assumed that she would kick him to the streets? Perhaps that was what he had intended to do all along. Marlene frowned at the idea of Sirius wandering aimlessly about London, probably in his Animagus form, just to hide away from his family. She wondered how terrible they must be for him to resort to such a thing.

Marlene turned back to her parents, a resolute look on her face. “However long he needs.”

****

Grant quickly set up a cot for Sirius in Freddie’s bedroom—who was far too excited to have a roommate for the time being—and Sirius offered his thanks every five minutes with Grant dismissing it with a wave of his hand stating “it’s just what we do, son.”

Marlene was preparing for bed in her own room when a tentative knock came from the door. “Come in.”

Her mother walked in, shutting the door behind her with a soft click before making herself comfortable on Marlene’s bed. She looked at Marlene with a curious but open expression and Marlene found herself wondering if her mother could see right through her.

“Is Sirius…someone you fancy?” She asked, and Marlene realized that perhaps her mother couldn’t see her at all.

“No.” She answered honestly, and her mother nodded, accepting the answer without question. Lottie still sat there though, mulling something around in her brain it seemed before letting it out.

“Is he in trouble?”

Marlene considered her mother’s question. The truth was that Marlene really wasn’t sure if Sirius was in trouble or not. It could just be him being his usual dramatic self and getting a kick out of ruining some extravagant family function, but somehow it felt different. The look of pure fear in his eyes when they were in that alley way was burned into her mind.

“I don’t know.” She said finally, her voice sounding more childish than she cared for. Her mother sighed, standing up and opening her arms which Marlene gratefully fell into. She closed her eyes, grateful that her parents were who they were. That they were so accepting and helpful towards everyone. It made her proud to be their daughter. She wondered idly if they would be accepting of everything or if there was some unforeseen limit to which their compassion reached.

Marlene thought about the events that occurred just a few days ago. The firewhiskey her and her friends had indulged in, intent on having one last night of fun before leaving each other for the winter holiday. She thought about the tingly feeling in her stomach as she leaned forward, placing her lips against Lily’s. She thought about the shocked look on Lily’s face and the small sound of surprise that came from Alice’s mouth. She thought about how she ran away before she could even give her friends a chance to ridicule her for her actions.

It had been eating at her ever since, and now, as her mother held her in her arms, she wondered how she would react to the idea of her daughter liking girls.

“Mum?” Marlene asked, her heart rate picking up speed and hands starting to shake.

“Yes, dear?” Lottie pulled back, a look of concern on her face.

Marlene felt her throat close up, blocking off the words she wanted to confess. I can’t do this. Not now.

“Never mind.” She breathed, looking down at her feet instead of meeting her mother’s gaze. Lottie lingered there a moment, debating whether or not to push the subject. In the end, she just hugged Marlene tighter and smoothed out her hair.

“Okay. But you can always come talk to me whenever you need, okay?” Lottie kissed her daughter’s forehead and went to leave the room, turning in the doorway just before exiting. “I love you.”

“I love you, too, mum.”

As her mother left, Marlene crawled into bed, huddling deeply beneath the blankets and turning to face the wall, finally allowing her tears to fall.

****

Marlene awoke to a frantic knocking on her door. She shot up in bed, immediately reaching for her wand and pointing it towards the doorway. What if it was the Lestranges? What if they had followed Marlene and Sirius straight to her home? What if it were the Blacks themselves, here to take their runaway heir home and punish those who gave him sanctuary?

“Marls! Open the door, it’s Freddie!”

A feeling of relief as well as slight irritation flooded through her. Freddie was tolerable most of the time, but waking her up in the middle of the night was definitely not a way to get on Marlene’s good side.

“What do you want, Mercury?” She asked as she swung the door open. Freddie was standing there, his hands twisted together and his face painted with worry and fear that immediately caused Marlene’s sour attitude toward her brother to vanish. “What’s the matter?”

“It’s Sirius. He won’t stop shaking and, and I thought he was having a nightmare and so I went over to shake him awake and he…he freaked out! He screamed and pushed me away and now he’s huddled in the corner and he won’t stop crying and—”

Marlene pushed past her brother and moved down the hallway towards his bedroom. When she got there, the cot was flipped over and the blankets were in a tangled mess on the floor. Sirius was pressed against the wall, his knees tucked up against his chest and his hands pulling anxiously at his hair. He was muttering something Marlene couldn’t quite make out but whatever it was, he sounded utterly terrified. Marlene turned to Freddie who had followed closely behind her.

“Go get mom.”

Freddie nodded and raced away, seemingly grateful about being given a task. Marlene turned her attention back to Sirius. He hadn’t even noticed the two of them had come into the room, too lost in whatever memory he was reliving. Marlene had heard about this sort of behavior before, when her dad spoke of her grandfather and the effects the war had on him. The panicked breathing and dissociation that blinded a person to their realities were sure signs of post-traumatic stress, she was sure. She was also sure she that she was way out of her depth to properly break Sirius out of it, but she’d be dammed if she didn’t try.

“Sirius,” She spoke slowly, inching towards him before kneeling in front of him. He shook harder, his breath coming out in pants. Merlin, he was going to make himself pass out.

“Hey,” She grabbed his hand and he recoiled with a scream.

“No! No, please! Please don’t, it hurts.” He whimpered. Marlene felt sick and uncomfortable. This was not the Sirius Black she knew. This was a scared and hurt little boy that Marlene could not help.

“What is it?” Marlene turned. Her mother was standing in the doorway, her father and brother right behind her. She watched as Lottie’s eyes found Sirius and she motioned for Marlene to move away. Marlene obliged, standing, and watching her mother crouch down in her place.

“Sirius, sweetie? It’s Lottie. Marlene’s mom, remember?” He didn’t respond but Lottie didn’t seem deterred.

“Breathe with me, Sirius. I’m going to count and we are going to breathe.”

Marlene watched in awe as her mother calmly coaxed Sirius out of the horrific state he was trapped in. They breathed together, with Sirius attempting to match Lottie the more lucid he became. Eventually, Lottie took his hands in hers, rubbing small circles in his palms with the pads of her thumbs. She spoke softly to him, asking him questions about his surroundings and Sirius muttered back short responses. Slowly, he came back to himself. Marlene stood in the doorway, Freddie beside her still looking quite distressed and her father with an unreadable expression playing on his features.

“Marlene could you come sit here beside Sirius? I’m going to go whip up a potion for him to take. Freddie, Grant, why don’t you come help me? Give Sirius some space.”

Freddie nodded wordlessly and turned to head down the stairs followed by his father. As Marlene passed her mother, Lottie put a hand on her shoulder.

“Don’t make him talk about it,” She whispered, “just listen if he does.”

Marlene nodded and Lottie gave her a sad smile before leaving the two teens alone. Sirius stared down at his lap, his eyes puffy with tears and his hair a tangly mess. He seemed embarrassed and shifted slightly when Marlene took a seat next to him. She didn’t blame him. She’d be pretty embarrassed too if her whole bravado façade fell apart in front of an audience. It was quiet between them, and Marlene struggled as she thought of something to say. She wanted to ask Sirius what had happened, what kind of nightmare he’d had to cause such a reaction, but she refrained. Still, she thought she could gather a well enough idea.

“I’m thinking of cutting some fringe.” She says instead, reaching up to toy with a strand of her hair. Sirius blinks, glancing toward her and then back at his toes. “I think it’d be a nice change, you know. Eleanor Tippets has fringe and it’s quite nice looking, don’t you think?”

“I’ve never thought about Eleanor Tippets.” Sirius responds. Progress, she thinks.

“Me neither. Not really. Just noticed her hair is all.” Marlene purses her lips. “James has some wild hair, doesn’t he? Does it naturally look like that or does he do it on purpose?”

A ghost of a smile traces Sirius’ lips and Marlene feels her muscles lose a bit of the tension she was unaware she had been holding.

“It’s naturally messy, though he does run his fingers through it often.”

“When he flirts with all the girls?”

“Well, just one girl, really. He still can’t get over Evans.”

Marlene tenses a bit but forces the conversation to continue. “Lily is nice.”

“So is James. She still hasn’t given him a chance.”

Sirius was right, Marlene supposed. James Potter wasn’t exactly the poster boy for good behavior, but he was nice enough. He always helped first years with their homework and encouraged the Gryffindor Quidditch team to win the games and have fun doing it. Lily had talked about James before, to Marlene and Alice, usually to complain about how annoying he was or about what elaborate date he asked her on that week. At the time, Marlene thrilled over the fact that Lily was not into James and perhaps she imagined it was for the same reasons Marlene wasn’t into boys. Now, though, as she looked back on it, she could remember the faint blush gracing her friend’s cheeks each time James smiled at her and the way her lips would twitch upwards just before she told him to get lost.

“My parents hate me.” Sirius said suddenly. Marlene felt her heart stop. Even if she expected it, it was different to hear the words falling so painfully out of Sirius’ mouth. She looked towards him, at the hunch of his shoulders and the pain in his eyes. It was painful to see Sirius this way. He should be jumping on the bed or ranting to Marlene about David Bowie. He shouldn’t be sitting in the corner with trembling hands and a fear of his family. It wasn’t right.

“They shouldn’t hate you.” Marlene knew it was a lame response, but she didn’t know what to say. She had never prepared for a conversation like this, let alone with Sirius Black.

Sirius scoffed. “Oh, I don’t know. I sometimes hate me.”

“Why?”

“We’re not close enough for this conversation, McKinnon.”

“Well, you’re the one who started it.”

Before Sirius could reply, Lottie had stepped back into the room, a cup held in her hand that presumably held the potion she had concocted. Sirius accepted it gratefully, attempting to put his mask of perfect manners back on, though his hands still shook as he drank. Lottie exchanged a look with Marlene, a frown on her face and pity in her eyes. Marlene looked away. She knew Sirius would hate to have any pity directed towards him so it felt wrong to accept such a look.

“You can stay in my room for the rest the night,” Marlene said, “I don’t want you to scare my brother awake with your screams again. He might just wet the bed.”

Lottie opened her mouth to scold Marlene, but Sirius just let out that barking laugh that Marlene had come to enjoy now that she had learned about Sirius’ animagus form. Her parents set the cot up in Marlene’s room quickly and said goodnight once more before shutting the bedroom door. Sirius stood awkwardly next to the cot, his hands clasped together in front of him. Marlene crawled underneath her own blankets, scooting as close to the wall as she could before patting the space next to her. Sirius raised an eyebrow.

“Are you inviting me into your bed, McKinnon?”

Marlene rolled her eyes. “Just for sleep, you dog.”

Sirius hesitated, but slid in beside her after a moment of consideration. He was careful not to touch her, whether that was to make her more comfortable or him, Marlene wasn’t sure. She turned on her side so that she was facing him. He stared resolutely at the ceiling, his hands on his chest and eyes wide open.

“You can relax you know. I don’t bite.”

“Biting might be fun.”

“Sirius—”

“I’m kidding!”

Marlene just shook her head. What a weird day, she thought as she closed her eyes and let her thoughts wander. Spending Christmas break with Sirius Black wasn’t something she had ever planned to do and now here he was, lying in her bed. Marlene wondered what Lily and Alice would say if she told them. She frowned as she thought of her friends. Would they still be her friends when she got back to Hogwarts? Or would they shy away from her, possibly even hate her. She couldn’t bear the sick feeling that washed over her at the idea of that.

“Penny for your thoughts?” Sirius asked. Marlene opened her eyes to see him gazing at her with an uncharacteristic look of empathy on his face. She narrowed her eyes at him.

“I’m thinking about how much sleep you’re costing me.”

Sirius flushed slightly, but persisted, nonetheless. “Oh, come on. Your face was all scrunched up, there’s no way you were thinking of sleep. Enlighten me, McKinnon.”

“No.”

“Is it a boy?”

“No.”

“Good. Then I have no competition.”

“Trust me when I say this, Sirius. You are not my type.”

Sirius hesitated and then, “I’m sorry for messing up your holiday. I can leave tomorrow. Find my way to James’ house. He’s more equipped to deal with this mess.”

Marlene wanted to reassure Sirius that he was no bother, that she was happy to help, but she couldn’t. Because she probably wasn’t as equipped to deal with all of Sirius’ stuff, not compared to James who knew Sirius better than anyone. Marlene suddenly felt a sense of guilt overcome her. She and Sirius had always been friends at school, chatting in the common room on occasion and sitting next to each other in history of magic, but they were never close. She supposed it was because Sirius didn’t let people get too close, no one except for James, Remus, and Peter. Not that she was any better.

“We can write him in the morning if that would make you more comfortable.” She mumbled. Sirius nodded.

“That would probably be best.”

“Sirius,” Marlene hesitated. “Sirius, I don’t want to pry or anything but…what happened? Why did you run away?”

A dark look settled over Sirius’ face and Marlene almost recoiled. Whatever happened had been bad, probably worse than Marlene could imagine. She almost regretted asking the question and was about to tell him he didn’t have to answer when he spoke in a breath.

“They tried to kill me.”

Marlene’s blood ran cold. She didn’t want to believe it. She wanted Sirius to crack a teasing smile and claim that he was just being his usual dramatic self and that he was exaggerating the story and that his parents just had some old-fashioned ideas that got him in trouble when he didn’t agree with them. That she could handle. But this…god, she was going to be sick.

“Why?” Her voice sounded childish, laced with curiosity, and horrified awe.

“I…disagreed with them, as usual. But this time it was because of more personal beliefs.”

“Personal beliefs?”

“I told them I was gay.”

There was a stutter in Marlene’s heart, a sudden thrill that she wasn’t alone, such an excitement that she almost screamed “me too!” back at him. But she didn’t. Because right now was about Sirius, not her. Instead, she reached out and took Sirius’ hand. He flinched at the motion but Marlene did not let go. She could not let go, not now, not when she might be the only person who Sirius might be able to relate to, that he might be the only person who could understand her. She felt the need to cling to this, to remember this moment as Sirius told her this secret with raw vulnerability and tears in his eyes because not only was the world cruel to people like them but his own parents couldn’t see past their own prejudices to just love their son. Instead, they set out to hurt and even kill. Marlene could make this moment matter. She could make this moment a happy moment for him.

“I’m so fucking proud of you.”

Sirius finally met her gaze, surprise evident on his face. She grinned back at him, her own eyes watering.

“I am so fucking proud of you, Sirius. For being strong enough and brave enough to stand up to your parents and be who you are. I really admire that and I am so happy that you shared it with me. Thank you.”

Sirius’ body seemed to lose all the tension he had been holding since bumping into Marlene earlier that day. God, had it only been a day? Marlene felt as though Sirius had been there for weeks, ready to burst at the seams at any moment. And this was that moment. He started crying in earnest, his body shaking and eyes becoming blinded with tears. Marlene inched forward, wrapping her arms around him, and holding him close. Her own face was wet with tears of joy and pain for her friend.

Eventually they fell asleep, wrapped tightly around each other. It was how Lottie found them in the morning.

#sirius black #marlene mckinnon #remus lupin #james potter #lily evans potter #wolfstar #jily #marauders #marauders era #sirius black angst #fanfiction #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter #💭 by kat #romulusnuffles

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