#I have interacted with this bitch the least and yet somehow we have feelings for each other

[what-do-you-mean-theyre-evil]

Feelings for whooooo, FEELINGS FOR WHOOOOOO 🦉🦉🦉🦉🦉!?!?!?!?

[sunglassesmish]

one thing that really annoys me and that i normally wouldn’t bitch about on main but i’m just not feeling all that great today so i’m gonna - is how some people who ship buddie but liked tommy - both in general and with buck - are acting. (editing this to say it got really long and a little off topic so proceed with caution)

before 7x10, they’d be like omg he’s so funny, so considerate, he’s so cute/handsome!! with an added disclaimer of (i still ship buddie and i think they’re gonna be endgame but i’m enjoying tommy and him with buck in the meantime!)

and then after that dinner scene, it was like a switch flipped. he’s so disgusting, insensitive, how dare he make a daddy issues joke when buck was talking about bobby basically being his father and when he was basically dying!!! how dare he!!!! i’m not gonna go into how that’s a gross misinterpretation of the scene and just plain wrong because that’s a whole other rant.

it was a drastic change. there’s all these posts hating on him, on everything they’d liked about him before. having the most negative misinterpretations of things they’d literally praised about him saying/doing before. all but rewriting canon dialogue to create this narrative of how much characters, mostly eddie, feel towards tommy.

now i see so many of these people making and/or reblogging posts saying they can’t wait for buck to break up with tommy because he either somehow mistook his feelings for eddie with feelings for tommy because they’re baSicaLly tHe sAme pErSon, or that eddie and everyone else will be like we never liked him in the first place, or some other insane post about how they’d kill tommy or rant about how much they hate him for things they literally had no problem with before.

like i’m not saying you can’t change your mind about a character, but i just think it’s crazy how much people can start to hate someone they literally had no problem with after ONE comment.

and this is another thing partially related, but seeing how the tommy hate has gotten so out of hand, i see comments on twitter and tumblr and even on instagram posts from the cast hating on him that veer towards sounding just plain homophobic. like the killing tommy ‘jokes’ ??? you’re not funny. you sound homophobic. ‘but i’m not homophobic for not liking a character and making a joke!!’ okay so imagine literally anyone else who knew nothing about the show making a comment like you’re doing. it’s not a good look.

to me, it seems clear that to these people, tommy was just meant to be a placeholder. he was meant to only be there for buck to realise his bisexuality, and then buddie was meant to be canon and so tommy is in the way somehow. because people took bi buck being shut down back in season 4 to be proof that buddie was meant to have gone canon (which i’m not saying wasn’t the case, but it’s never been confirmed or really even hinted at.)

so now anything to do with tommy just makes people so mad, because he’s still here and buddie isn’t happening. so they’re purposefully having the most negative interpretation of anything to do with tommy to make themselves feel better.

hating on tommy makes it easier to deal with the fact buddie doesn’t seem to in the cards (at least rn). so people don’t have to really consider that it may never happen, so they don’t have to shift the blame onto the actors and writers and anyone else. so they can continue to read into any oliver and ryan interaction into meaning canon buddie, anything they say in interviews that doesn’t point towards canon buddie, to misinterpret anything they do say (including ryan continuously calling eddie heterosexual, that’s a big one) because they can’t give away anything yet, it has to be a surprise!!!

tldr: people are hating on tommy after 7x10, and it’s less to do with anything he said in that scene and more to do with the fact that he’s still on the show and buddie doesn’t seem to be going canon. and that hating on him makes it easier to deal with that fact.

[cellsshapedlikestars]

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by @hilarychuff

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

honestly, I'm sometimes embarrassed by how much I've written in the 3 1/2 years since I started posting. Currently 66

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

1,350,298. yikes.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

at this point, Jonsa. we do not talk about The Prior Fandom

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

a fairytale ending (by a WIDE margin)

the mating game

take me out

moth's wings

ever fallen in love (on national TV)

(shocker, it's all my romcoms lmao. also, let's not talk about how the top 4 are all fake dating fics. I can't help myself)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to. I used to do it on all fics, but as discussed above, I'm a wordy bitch and at points responding to all comments on, for example, one shot event fics that I would post back-to-back got overwhelming. So I allowed myself to stop responding to comments on one shots. Recently I had quite the mental health dip and didn't respond to any for a while, but I think I'm back.

Part of the reason I like fandom is the sense of community. I started responding to comments on my first fic because I hadn't resurrected my tumblr from the grave yet, so it was the only way to interact with the fandom. Then I continued to because I appreciated the comments, even if they were simple and I had nothing else to say except thank you. I still try to on chaptered fics because, let's face it, without comments and without community, I wouldn't be posting my stories.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

probably my WWI one-shot

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I try to write at least *hopeful* endings for all my fics. I don't know if I can quantify "happiest", because I think that's different for everyone.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

of course. I feel like it's a rite of passage on ao3 to get some shitty hate comments

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

*through clenched teeth* I sure do

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I'm not really a fan of crossovers tbh

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that I'm aware of

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

not that I'm aware of

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

nope! I don't think I could tbh. I'm sort of a control freak and I even have problems letting people pre-read things, I have no idea why. I think the only people I've let pre-read anything are @hilarychuff (who is my brainstorm buddy) and @greenhikingboots (who is the reason the last chapter of the ghost inside made any coherent sense)

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

I mean, Jonsa. I honestly don't ship that often

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

sigh. white knuckles.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I'm very fast at it lmao. Like, seriously. I type very fast. I'm also somehow really good at starting a fic off with only an inciting incident, no other real plans, and somehow coming up with a full plot/ending that I'm satisfied with, while posting it as I develop the story

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

outlines. smut.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I can barely handle English my guy

19. First fandom you wrote for?

hmmm that depends on what the criteria is. First fandom I wrote for was Sailor Moon, I just never posted it anywhere. Harry Potter was technically the first fandom I posted for, but it was one chapter and I never continued it and I genuinely can't even remember what it was called, all I remember is Harry melted Voldemort with a bucket of soapy water like in the Enchanted Forest Chronicles.

The first fandom I was actually active in and wrote more than just a chapter was... A secret. I'm actually a little embarrassed about it and my fics are still floating around out there and some of them make me cringe sooooo hard. I don't think I've ever admitted to it here on tumblr dot com and I don't think I will now

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

help me out of the shape I'm in

I'm always so anxious about tagging people and leaving people out and making them feel bad, but I'll try to do it anyway. @greenhikingboots @sibyldisobedience @thewolvescalledmehome @esther-dot @periwinkle39 @eruherdiriel and anyone else who wants to do this! (also, no pressure to anyone I did tag lol)

[brainrotparsecsaway]

Okay a series of questions for you

1. Who was Quasar's master?

2. (Stemming from question 1) If Quasar's master was a canon star wars character, who would that master be?

3. Does Quasar have a bestie?

4. How did Quasar lose one of his legs?

5. Tell me more about that Togruta hunk and pretty pink Twi'lek 👉👈

6. Remember to hydrate and eat something bc all bad bitches do <3

Fuck yeah more >:D

You're single handedly keeping my asks alive. Also this is good because I have no idea what you guys would be interested in hearing

Warning this is long.

1/2. If I could pick a canon character I feel like Eeth Koth is a great fit for Quasar. Would also match with the times she Eeth Koth left the order and when Quasar was knighted. Koth has this weird thing about learning to handle pain (reason why Grevious failed at getting information out of him even under torture) and Quasar would probably benefit from the same skill.

I haven't made him an oc master since he isn't in the picture for too long (and Koth felt like a good match) but if I had to, I've always been picturing someone who kinda looks like Koth, so a mid tone Zabrak

3. Quasar unfortunately does not have a best friend, at least when he's older unless you count Bucket. BUT! During his jedi years he did have friends, probably on the best friend level. I do have some designs for them a mirlian and a togruta, but I've yet to redo them so to speak as Quasar's story changed a bit since I originally made them

4. >:))) oh you've hit a big plot point I've planned to make a comic about. Well, to not be overly spoilery and to keep it short: he lost it during the early days of the war when he was cooperating with some clone squad (not yet sure if it was a sub devision of Dead zone) before he became a general. We're talking about like a barely knighted 15-16 year old Quasar, just a legal adult in nautolan standards. Welp, my main plan is that he's hunting a stolen holocron down from the enemy's ship, and the enemy sets their ship to explode so you can imagine the ships integrity does not like it when parts of it get exploded off :)

Yeaah he doesn't really like tight spaces let's say that

5. HAH I'M DYING! But yes Gurmenas and Mi'var. I'm surprised I haven't drawn them more.

Anyway let's do the basic lore of them since there isn't a whole lot about them yet.

Gurmenas: let's be honest here, we like villains here and he is my very much indulged villain character and nothing else. This man does NOT know how to cook, social interactions NONE, yet people like him and I understand. Try to fix him, I dare you, he'll fight against you with teeth and nail, he knows he's fucked up and loves it. Oh yeah he's also an imperial, ain't that fun :) his hobbies include torture, first degree murderer and manipulation, I intend to not give him any redeeming qualities :)

Mi'var: my girl, what a goth (?) queen. For her I surprisingly have even less. I've been thinking that she could be related to Hera from her mother's side, and thus aristocratic, but still undecided on that. Well either way girly said no and became a rule breaker by joining or even starting a smugglers guild of her own, and we know she somehow dragged Quasar into it for a little while. Anyway her hobbies include: being quite literally better than you (knows a lot of things), fashion and probably caring for a handful of droids and or animals she's rescued

6. 🫡 Will do, you too readers

[tavyliasin]

ATG 7 - Love? Lust.

In which the devil gets his due...

Pairing: Raphael/Haarlep  SPICE Rating: 4.5/5 I pulled it from my soul somehow (side note I should review this rating considering my later works, this was at the time of writing) Content Warnings:  Sex, rough sex, BDSM, Bondage, Anger, power play, mild choking,

Spoilers Act 3, House of Hope area and character appearance of Haarlep Canon Compliance Canon Level "Hahaha! NO." (Please read that as Haarlep in that scene.) - The only canon is in the backstory of Raphael and Haarlep's relationship and their dynamics. It is chaotic to me how we don't see them share the screen but I can feel their whole hate/lust dynamic.  Other Notes (From the original time of posting) Sometimes you just want an indulgent chapter to take off the brakes and let it roll right into the chaos because 2 fiends keep staring at you from the dark corner of your brain waiting to get laid while Tav indulges in the nice soft chapters. This one is dedicated to everyone else who went utterly hingeless when they met Haarlep, they are my favourite bitch and I love them forever. This is also a contrast to the previous chapter where our 2 mains choose love over lust together, there's absolutely no love here. That's not how these two like to play. And that's fine, it works for them like this.  ADDITIONAL NOTE - This was the first piece I wrote for Raphael and Haarlep, that solidified the brainrot for both. I found writing their interactions positively intoxicating and have not wanted to stop since. Song/Mood Phantom by NateWantsToBattle "Make no mistake, I'll break you down (Whoa-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh) Shout it around town I'm not what you want But I'm exactly what you need Take a bite and feed Your satisfaction guaranteed. I'm your sunshine, whoa I'm gonna burn down your parade I'm a shooting star That wish you wished you never made"

----- FULL CHAPTER BELOW THE CUT -----

Another impossible slam of an ethereal portal almost startled the demon reclining on silk sheets. They smirked. This was going to be an amusing evening.

The slammer of the door, however, had no such look on his face. His brows were lowered, that little vein on his forehead almost visibly throbbing beneath his skin, the physical heat of his rage warming the room by several degrees. An impressive feat given the mansion was in Avernus, one of the literal Nine Hells, with a…well, perhaps not beautiful but at least in some ways breathtaking view of fields of lava from the open balcony door.

With a gesture, Raphael dismissed the portal fully, the shimmering mist dissolving into nothing. He gazed at his likeness, looking at him over the top of a wine glass. No, not looking. Haarlep was judging him again.

"I'm in no mood for your insolence, Harlot ." He spat the insult from tight lips, yet still approached the bed and sat beside his devilish double. Even whilst still in his human form, the resemblance was remarkable, and if Raphael decided to transform into his true fiendish body then it would be almost like looking in a mirror. Almost . Somehow Haarlep made his own form just a little more alluring, a little too perfect, perhaps. He had no doubt this was all a part of the game the incubus liked to play, so he pictured the board and moved his pawns like always.

"I thought you'd be happy!" Haarlep laughed, offering a fresh glass to their cambion companion as they echoed his own voice. "Didn't you get exactly what you wanted?"

"Yes. No. Fuck you. "

"Hah! Now that's a good one." The incubus shifted their physical body to the form of the Archduchess, a twisted feminine version of Raphael, to give him an extra sultry gaze. "Fuck me yourself, if you dare."

"Insolent little… How easily you forget that I outrank you." Raphael took the wine and drained it in one gulp, throwing the empty vessel unceremoniously across the room.

"Temper, temper~" Haarlep purred, shifting their body back to the masculine form and leaning over Raphael. To make a point, he assumed. "You might outrank me out there , but that's not how things work in here and you know that." They pressed a clawed hand against Raphael's human chest, their weight bearing down for a moment with intense strength, before releasing the grip and drifting their hand to his chin instead. "Now, how about you tell me what happened, hmm? I've been dying to hear how it went."

"As if you weren't scrying the entire time." The human formed devil muttered darkly, shifting slightly where he lay, feeling uncomfortably warmer from being so close to his partner. "But if you must hear a bedtime story then so be it. She took the bait, almost too easily, and I gave them what they wanted."

"Naturally, you give them a taste," Haarlep punctuated the pause in their words with a tongue running up Raphael's ear before whispering the rest, "so now they'll crave more."

The demon ached as the incubus pulled away again, plucking a grape from the bunch and devouring it. Oh to be that grape- "Yes yes all according to plan. Whet their appetite, give them reason to trust, and reel them in with something much bigger."

"You're certain they can get what you want?" Haarlep raised an eyebrow, genuinely unsure this time. Something that didn't happen often with the cocky bastard.

"If they make it out of Moonrise and past Ketheric in one piece, then yes."

"And if they don't?" The incubus ran a clawed finger up the inside of his leg this time, trying to steal his ability to speak with the building desire, the achingly slow tease of everything they did. 

Fuck, even their slutty harness is too- He stopped the thought, realising the pause was giving his lover everything they wanted. Too easily. "If they don't then Korilla owes me 5 soul coins, so either way I win."

"Should I be praising how astute your gamble is?" Haarlep's tone grew more mocking.

"Should I be praising how lustful you are? I know I have them right where I want them." He growled.

Haarlep began to loosen his fine silk clothes, nimble fingers finding ways to tease even with this. "And yet here you are, absolutely furious. Why? Do you think the Little Mouse might bite?"

Raphael clenched his fists in an involuntary display of rage. "If she does," he hissed through gritted teeth, "she will meet her end at my claws."

"Ahh there it is. Finally. You want to have your cake and eat it too."

"She's almost as infuriating as you are."

"My, my, Archduke , do you finally have eyes for someone besides yourself?" Haarlep was sounding more amused by the second, clearly enjoying seeing the fiend so riled up.

"Obviously not," he lied, "I'd like to take her down a peg. Maybe three, come to think of it."

"Well you can't risk damaging your toy before you have what you want, can you~" Haarlep purred, discarding the ruffled shirts that had now been removed. "Oh, your real form, if you please."

Doing as he was bidden automatically, Raphael's body almost instantly shifted to his demonic form, horns rising in twisted shapes above fiery crimson skin, and his still neat and chestnut brown hair barely changing. "Of course I can't break her , but there has to be some way- You've heard how she speaks to me, haven't you? I know too well you sit there scrying like I'm putting on a play for your amusement."

"Well of course, I am your biggest fan ," Haarlep sneered, the subtle insult not unnoticed yet remaining unchallenged as the power balance continued to shift in their favour. It always did. "Perhaps you should try another co-star on your stage. I can't say I'm not curious either, it is so entertaining watching her sharp tongue match wits with yours."

"Careful, Harlot , you are here by my grace alone , remember?"

"Hah! Grace? That's what you call it? No." Haarlep snatched up his throat in their claws, almost cutting into the flesh with the pressure, eyes alight with more than the usual fire. "And you will call me by my name, now, Archduke ."

The title was a snub, and Raphael knew it, but the incubus had a hold on him in more ways than one. "Fine, Haarlep ," he gasped, the pressure finally relieving just slightly. "There's barely any difference anyway." He averted his eyes just for a moment. Wrong move.

"You will look at me when addressing me," their hand was now gripping Raphael's chin savagely, "and I am not beyond silencing that rude little tongue of yours either."

Barely a moment after letting go of his face, Haarlep had straddled the devil's chest, pressing his heated and leather bound underwear to the lips of his furious lover. The game had truly begun now.

Raphael's teeth sunk into the leather, piercing it just enough to elicit a wanton howl from Haarlep who grabbed the back of his head and pulled him away. "Only bite if you're prepared to be bitten."

The challenge stood heavy and pointed, as they released Raphael once more, one of their hands slipping behind them to start loosening his trousers. Their tail was already curling around his ankle, a further dare to drive him damn near insane. Without words, he pulled aside the lower parts of the leather harness, - hands gripping them slightly too perfect thighs - and pulling Haarlep into his mouth.

The incubus moaned, the usual performance, but oh how they did enjoy it more when they got what they wanted. Raphael could be so plain unless they really riled him up. Anger and lust, it seemed, were excellent bedfellows. Like pleasure and pain, they mused as teeth raked along their length eliciting another wanton moan, the perfect balanced meal.

Raphael had no intention of giving in to everything his reflection desired, but he couldn't deny how good it felt. The incubus had connected them by taking his form, a hellish contract binding them, so he could feel everything. Not only could he feel his own throat beginning to burn as Haarlep's hips pressed agonisingly forwards, he could feel the sensation of lips around himself. 

This was the caveat of the deal, naturally. Giving release to the incubus would also give him his own, but that meant the bastard would win, again , and that simply could not stand. Just as he felt the pressure begin to rise, he dug his teeth and claws in just enough to bring it back. 

"Oh so you want to play it that way, do you?" Haarlep hissed, dragging Raphael's head back and pressing his head firmly to the pillow. "Ironic, isn't it, that you insist on such plush silk comforts when what you really want-" the incubus raised their hand in the air, a thin whip-like vine appearing in their grip, "is far from comfort at all." 

The whip cracked in the air, thin red lightning dancing along the length, as Haarlep rose from above Raphael, already preparing the next spell. Thicker vines now curled up from beneath the bed. Before they found their mark, however, Haarlep unceremoniously flipped Raphael over with a deft movement, pressing his face into the pillow now as the vines wrapped and secured wrists and ankles.

The demon lay face down on his own bed, by all appearances utterly helpless, his legs spread apart and his arms crossed and bound behind his back. His wings were held apart to reveal parts of his bare back, bound very precisely to keep them where they were out of the way of the incubus' designs. Only his cambion tail remained free, until, of course, Haarlep grabbed hold of it and pulled.

"You look so much better like this, Archduke ," they laughed, bringing the whip down between his shoulder blades with practiced ease. Raphael moaned into the pillow, unable to form words to respond. "And you sound better, too."

Each sting of electric pain was not enough to do harm, no it would take far more than this to actually wound a Cambion of his rank, but still Raphael felt the exquisite agony. They had danced this dance for countless centuries, but even from the beginning the incubus knew exactly how to work his body. Of course they would , he thought between muffled groans as the whip struck true across his body whilst a clawed hand reached down between his legs, they're a fucking pleasure fiend. 

Haarlep grinned wickedly. This was a perfect evening, watching the powerful Raphael melt into silk sheets, building up the pleasure then leaving him wanting and squirming beneath them. They felt it all, and they felt so much more. Each little wanton whimper was like another plate at a buffet, a banquet of delicacies that they were cooking for themselves. A greedy chef, perhaps, but they had to feed. Might as well season it perfectly, they mused to themselves, licking their fingers in anticipation.

Some days Raphael wondered how the bed beneath him did not burst into flame, either with the anger or the lust. This was certainly one of those days. He was white hot, tense, when the incubus' finger entered. He damn near moaned the bitch's name in that instant, but he held on stubbornly forbidding them from taking everything quite so easily. Futile, in the end, but his pride kept the fight going.

Accepting the unspoken challenge, Haarlep cast the whip aside, plunging a second finger inside their partner and pulling hard on his tail, relishing the deepened groan it drew forth. "You will be calling my name soon enough, Archduke , but you can keep fighting if you must." 

Their fingers curled, finding their mark, removing his breath and turning his mind almost empty as he pressed against the sheets, writhing for any moment of friction, desperate for more. Fuck , was about the only thought that found purchase in his brain. 

Haarlep continued the torment, switching between pulling, biting, and occasionally kissing the Cambion's tail - though there was not a hint of affection from the touch of their lips - and raking their claws along his spine, gripping the back of his neck, and pulling at that oh so neat hair. Yes, they thought delightedly, this is the best view of him, wanton, struggling, desperately full of desire. They drank in the heat, prolonging every moment to savour the meal spread before them. Literally, spread, they grinned to themselves, whatever would the little mouse think to see the mighty predator brought to ruin.

Just as Raphael was at the edge of that daunting yet exhilarating cliff, the incubus pulled back once more, leaving him infuriatingly empty. "No." He hissed into the pillow, barely audible. "No stopping."

"My my, it seems someone has forgotten who is in charge again." The vines holding the cambion pulled wickedly, snaking now around his hips and forcing them up until he was on his knees. Haarlep had moved behind him now, leaning down over him until their chest pressed against his arms, voice hot near his ear. "You will call my name. You will beg before we are through." 

There was nothing gentle nor loving about the embrace of two fiends in the heat of pure lust. There never would be, never could be, it simply wasn't in their nature to do anything but this. The battle, the fight, wits and bodies pitted against each other in an endless back and forth until something broke.

Raphael's mind nearly did as the demon behind him thrust inside, chuckling darkly at the gasp that escaped before he could stop it. 

"Good," the incubus growled, biting down on the back of his neck before continuing, "feel it, all of it. Feel you , just like you wanted."

Savage teeth bore down on hot skin again, Haarlep's muscular chest crushing Raphael's wings and arms against his back. But fuck did it feel good. He bit down on the pillow himself, almost feeling it like it was his own neck in his mouth. Exactly what they intended , he might have thought, had a hand not found purchase between his legs. A savage grip began to work him harder now, timed perfectly to the brutal thrust of hips, the sound of skin on skin filling his ears as every muscle began to tense from the sheer overwhelming sensations. Fucking, being fucked, skilled fingers finding every extra nerve as lips and tongue and teeth caressed tender flesh. 

"Please, Haarlep- " the words left Raphael's lips unbidden and with infuriating ease. Just as promised he had been drawn to this, begging, writhing, desperately on the edge.

"I told you so." The echo of his own voice dark in his ear was swiftly followed by a harmony of exquisite moans as the final thrusts drove both of them into a mindsplitting climax. 

All control had been ceded, the incubus had snatched yet another victory from the pride of the so-called Master of the House , the satisfaction as overwhelming as the frustration was to be left both filled and entirely empty as the vines began to recede. 

"Now, doesn't that feel better? You played so well, I do hope you go and visit your Little Mouse again soon. Perhaps I should send her some flowers? A fruit basket?" Haarlep laughed, already strolling towards the huge open pool of a bath on the other side of the room.

"You are truly insufferable." Raphael resisted the urge to add the insulting nickname as he rubbed feeling back into aching limbs, working up the strength to use his legs again. "But I will have her, one way or another."

"Will you now?" The incubus called back, sinking into the luxurious waters scented with cinnamon and cherries. A little hint of the aromas that mingled from each when they were close. "I do hope you at least let me watch ."

Raphael tested his weight on his legs, before resigning himself to sit a little longer. "I have half a mind to hand her over to you, just to teach her a lesson."

"Hah! What's this now? Don't think you can handle a scary little mouse?" Haarlep's musical laugh echoed around the room, ever more infuriating.

"No, she's just not worth my effort."

"I suppose we shall see, then. If they ever make it to the city, of course." 

"I have a feeling they will…" Raphael's mind was beginning to wander again, half tempted to scry himself to keep an eye on that improbable group of misfits.

"Won't that mean you lose your money to the little bitch you have watching them?"

"It won't matter," Raphael replied, one clawed hand rubbing his aching neck, "the prize they can bring me will be worth far more than a handful of damned souls."

----------- ----------- ENDING NOTES ----------- -----------

From the original work: ---

I'll note here that usually in BDSM you would have aftercare following something intense, but the amount of time these 2 have been together and with their whole dynamic it feels like Raphael would find the idea insulting. However, when he eventually is able to walk straight, or perhaps fly across to the healing pool, Haarlep is ready and waiting to shampoo his hair and soothe any lingering aches and wounds.

Haarlep is a responsible Dom, is what I'm saying, Raph is just a brat sub-leaning switch vers to his core so he's not going to enjoy much softness unless it is very specifically on his terms.

I'm dying to write more of these 2 as well, and don't worry Tav will get her turn to truly dance with these devils. Oh the ideas I have, darlings, would make more than a blacksmith blush. Whether I find that power within my dark soul to put them to words remains to be seen, of course...we shall try. For you, loves. --- And I did exactly that! I do so love looking back on these notes from a mere few months past, where I was still stumbling through the new wilderness before finding I was always meant to be here~ Now, the new notes? I still adore this chapter, it's the perfect mirror opposite of the last one where Astarion and Tav explore the importance of Love while leaving Lust aside. Raphael and Haarlep have no need for Love when hedonistic Lust satisfies both of their needs. Which is not to say they shun all emotion, far from it, they just have a very different attitude to sex and relationships. It's a different world for fiends who live thousands of years~

Oh, and as a special treat...some LiArt~

Until next chapter - oh, and the next chapter for those who haven't read before on AO3? That's the Tav x Emperor chapter~

[vintage-brass-tc]

Just a little TC update!

I’m sorry I haven’t posted in a while!! I’ve just been focusing on my studies and whatnot, and for a while I have been falling out of my feelings, because I felt as if M was distancing himself from me a TON, based on his demeanor, lack of verbal and nonverbal communication between us, and because of the fact that I’m not his first pick for everything anymore. U-wise, I just thought, since I was growing less passionate for M, I’d use this opportunity to maybe pull myself together and get over my feelings for both of them in one sweep.

….Recently, though, I think my feelings been picking up just a liiiittle more. It’s funny what great interactions can do to you <3

|||||||||||||||||||||

With M, ever since maybe November or so, I’ve noticed that M had been giving me way less attention than he usually would (or at least, as much as I thought he’d give me in a given moment), and it brought me into total mental disarray.

I thought he hated me, I thought he caught onto my feelings or something and thought I was creepy, I thought he didn’t think I was good enough for him anymore— not as much as I used to be as a tuba player— and it drove me insane. I was so insecure and with any moment he didn’t look at me or pay attention to me during a class or conversation, I was sent into spiral after spiral of panicking. You know the drill, or maybe you don’t! But these feelings were very real to me and they were not fun at all.

With U, things have been alright! It seems like he believes I’m reliable enough to lead my section in jazz band, and knows that I can count rhythms and hold myself up to a high enough standard to play my bass trombone decently in tune (though my muscle memory of the positions aren’t perfect yet, as I’m still learning)… but my improv could definitely use some work. We both know that. He’s still fairly gentle with me about it though!

We had a band trip recently, and U had been giving me the cold shoulder for a good deal of it, making me think I had done something to offend him. Just as my fears about M were brewing, I felt the ones about U doing the same, and was worried I had somehow unknowingly ruined my relationship with both of them, all based on receiving not as much attention from them as I once did.

I was certain I was doomed, but just last week, I had two of the most genuine and uplifting conversations with them, and my heart is full just thinking about them.

~~

First off, U.

He and I had the most casual and upbeat conversation on Wednesday, and he looked at me, listened to me, included me, laughed, and smiled so much!! AHHH it was so much fun!!! He’s seriously such a joy to talk to and I love his boisterous, albeit serious sense of humor. He curses so much when he’s comfortable, and he called the whole class “little bitches” too, haha. ❤️ Having this talk with him was so refreshing because it revealed to me that he cared about what I had to say, and the fact he was looking at ME most of the time and smiled so much when I’d laugh just made me feel so appreciated.

~~

And on Friday, with M, we had a heart-to-heart, and it went better than anything I’d ever imagined it could be. It seriously warmed my heart.

So, for some background, I had a sectional with M on Tuesday, and the whole time it seemed like he was just being passive-aggressive with me (though I later learned it was all in my head): M wouldn’t look me in the eye at all, didn’t include me or look at me when he was speaking to the girls in the room (4 people in a room of 18… so it wasn’t hard to just *glance* and maybe nod), until I made an exasperated comment to myself about being chopped liver because he wasn’t listening to my input… which he responded to with a certain look on his face, maybe frustrated, maybe disdained, but he didn’t drag it out any further because he moved onto the next topic pretty quick.

But it didn’t go the best at certain points, and because I focused on these points so much I let all the better moments slip from my mind, and I was crying the whole way home. All of the insecurities, worries, and hurt I felt for the past few months were pouring out of me, and I decided that I would finally make a move to resolve it after months of consideration, writing him an email that I needed to talk with him. He responded so enthusiastically, I almost felt bad :( and as I thought he would, he responded super quickly with a date and time, which would be on Friday since he was out the other two days, so there I was, left to wait.

But once the day came, as I suspected, I really regretted writing that email because the stress had always come in waves, so by that time I was kind of over it. But I knew the talk had to happen, so I hoped he would remember the appointment (because he’s forgotten three of them before) and collected my thoughts in my Notes app.

And once the when he walked into the practice room I was in… I was relieved for one moment, that he actually remembered. He was in a rush like he had been looking for me, and once he saw me, he looked relieved as well. But then the next second, when he asked me “What’s the matter?” and leaned against the table beside him, I was paralyzed, cocking my head back and forth between him and my phone, totally speechless for a good few seconds. Wanting to make it end, I told him that I had been gathering all of my thoughts on my phone, so I could make sure I was saying the right things.

Then I poured out my feelings. About the tension I felt between us. About me feeling like I was invisible around him, like he didn’t care about me anymore because he didn’t talk to me or look at me as often, about my fear that he didn’t realize just how much I respected him and how much I reflected that through my constant effort in class every day, looking up and acknowledging him when he spoke because I cared about what he had to say. At this point, there were tears streaming down my face, but I was fighting hard to keep my voice steady. I then told him that I thought I had offended him…so I asked, “Did I ever offend you in any way?”

This whole time, M was staring at me with his dark, dark brown eyes, listening intently to what I had to say. It was a lot..but he went around the table, maybe pacing a little before leaning on it and closing his eyes, looking down before admitting his own faults, his flaws that he knew were prominent and needed to work on, like not giving people enough credit for the good things and instead always focusing on the bad.

And not looking people in the eyes in fear of making them nervous or overwhelmed. And then, in response to my comment about him ignoring me and not respecting me back with his actions, and about me being afraid of there being any tension between us, he said this.

“[R]…. You’re a doll. You’re a dear. You’re a sweetie. You are the sweetest kid I’ve ever known. There has never been anything between us, ever.”

And he gave me the sweetest look in the entire world while I looked up at him with the saddest eyes. My heart burst with warmth and butterflies hearing him tell me this, and then he went on about how one of his favorite parts of his day was seeing me every day, so committed and engaged in his class.

He said, regardless of his action of making another tuba the lead tuba in our class, and choosing them for the orchestra, he truly did love my sound so much more…and it was a really, really crushing decision. (I then made an uneasy expression and assured him that I wasn’t here to talk about THAT, because I know why he made the decision— the other tuba totally deserved it for their hard work—though I did nod gratefully at his statement… and it made me feel so much better about my worth and all that.)

After all of this was said, he looked at me with a gentle, sympathetic smile, saying that he could tell, based on the tears, that I was probably holding this in for a really long time.

Looking at the floor and chuckling, I admitted that I was holding it in for a WHILE, because I didn’t want to bother him again with my problems. He immediately piped up and told me “You are *never* bothering me. Ever. Don’t do that— come talk to me right away if you ever start having that feeling again.”

Then he relayed that he absolutely loved having me around…and we only had one more year left together. He said this with a wistful look in his eye, like he was already missing me. I frowned: did he feel the same pain about me leaving as I did? Will he miss me as much as I will miss him?

He asked me if this was all I wanted to talk about, and I was like “Yeah, pretty much…” before I started sniffling. Then he smiled softly, almost adoringly, and asked with a chuckle, “Can I have a hug?” “Yes…” I began to smile and stood up weakly, and fell into his extended arms. His build felt more rigid than it did last time I hugged him. We embraced each other for a second or two, and I thanked him for everything. He said “Of course!!”

Then he pulled away, turned to walk out the door, then stopped. He turned towards me again, then he spoke,

“You are worth the whole world.”

My heart soared at his sentiment. All I could muster out in response was a shaky, quiet, “you too…” and we smiled at each other. I thanked him one more time, he returned it, then he walked out. I stared after him, feeling so, so relieved and so, so loved.

He thinks the world of me. ❤️

[hairstevington]

i wanna cut to the feeling (chapter 3)

Eddie Munson x Steve Harrington

Summary: Robin drags her best friend to a Corroded Coffin show. How were they to know sparks would fly between Steve and a member of the band? (aka, the fic where Steve fixes Eddie's hair before a show and falls in love immediately)

Word Count: 2.7K for this chapter, but it's an ongoing fic

Warnings: Everybody is a gay disaster, Hairstylist!Steve is a petty bitch, Rockstar!Eddie is a bit of a diva, Robin knows Steve too well, nothing crazy yet but I reserve the right to get crazy later

A/N: Here we go again, folks! I can't stop writing lol. Steve's jealousy in this chapter makes me laugh, so enjoy! PS, would anyone be interested in me creating fake lyrics to Corroded Coffin songs? As always, thanks for reading ❤️

Previous Chapter ~ Next Chapter

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“No way. Dude, that’s so fucking dope.” Eddie could not believe what he was staring at. “Guys! Come see this!” He gestured for the others in the band to come closer to him and this fan - Bri, that was her name - who had gotten a Corroded Coffin tattoo. She had an actual, permanent, badass tattoo about Eddie’s band, and that was the coolest thing that had ever happened to him. A tattoo? Hooooly shit. “Thank you, we are so honored.”

“You’re welcome,” she responded. “The song just meant a lot to me, you know? Like, I don’t know exactly what you were going through, but it’s so universal I think.”

The tattoo was a reference to one of the band's earliest songs, ‘86’  - written entirely by Eddie his senior year. He was flipping burgers at the time, which was totally humiliating, by the way, and they used to always use the term 86 when something ran out. Anyway, at that point in his life he felt rejected quite a bit. Left out. Eighty-sixed. You know? 

It was probably their softest song, sound-wise, but that didn’t mean it was less angry than their other music. In fact, it was one he wrote while he probably felt the most angry, or hopeless at least. They hadn’t played it tonight, because it didn’t match the vibe, but it was one of his favorites.

And this girl, Bri, had a tiny 86 on the inside of her wrist. She had lots of tattoos, actually. He noticed one on her collar bone of a slice of watermelon.

“What’s this one for?” he asked, curious.

“I just really like watermelon,” she replied. 

Eddie smirked. He kinda liked this girl.

-

“Tattoos are so cool,” Robin sighed, staring wistfully at her future date. “I wish I had one.” 

“You can get one, you know,” Steve responded. “Oh, right. You do know, because of the time you dragged me to a shop and got all the way to the chair just to panic and run out of the store.”

“I thought we agreed to never mention that again.”

“It was relevant,” Steve shrugged.

He watched Eddie interact with Bri, like he was smitten or something. Steve wondered if that’s what he looked like. He figured he held it together enough before in the dressing room, but now? He really had to keep himself restrained. 

This is fine. Pretending he didn’t like guys was something he used to do all the time. Eddie smirked at something she said, and ran his fingers through his beautiful hair. This is fine, god dammit. 

Steve couldn’t get a good read on Bri, despite the intrigue. She was facing away from him, so it was hard to tell exactly how she was feeling, but she seemed somewhat receptive to Eddie’s charms. It’s just that she had also just accepted to go on a date with Robin. 

Not that it’s bad for someone to accept a date and then flirt with other people. She was completely in her rights, and it didn’t really have anything to do with her anyway. With awesome, perfect, beautiful Bri who somehow had the attention of both Robin and Eddie. Fantastic. 

Eddie was fully enraptured in his conversation with her, now. 

Yes, okay, fine! Steve was kind of a jealous person! I mean, he had jealous tendencies. Or, more accurately, when he felt jealous he turned a little petty. If he had to have a bad quality, there are worse ones, you know? But otherwise, he thought he was a pretty good dude. He made decent money for a 24 year old. He was good at his job. He was loyal and protective, and he always tried to see the good side of things - tried being the key word there.

Eddie was way too good at flirting with these women, almost like it was nothing. How could he do that? Do the fans really mean that little to him that he’d just go after them all and wait for one to stick? It wasn’t the worst tactic, and it’s not like he was being disrespectful about it, but still. He was laying it on so thick it was insane. 

Ah, shit. It was none of Steve’s business. Eddie could do whatever he wanted with whoever he wanted, but Steve had the petty, judgemental thought anyway - Am I attracted to a fuckboy?

-

“Well, it was so great to finally meet you. Hopefully I’ll catch you at another show sometime.”

Eddie was impressed at how cool and collected Bri was. She seemed to completely respect his work, and even though she was a huge fan and had a Corroded Coffin tattoo, she didn’t come off like she had an altar at home dedicated to them or anything like that - although Eddie couldn’t deny he’d still think that was dope.

“Yeah, I hope I do.” He smiled at her, genuinely, without a trace of the fake flirtation he was so used to putting on for these women. She smiled back, then waved goodbye and took off, leaving only Steve and Robin in front of him.

“Well, well, well.” Eddie’s eyes narrowed, eager to find out how this conversation was going to go. “If it isn’t my knight in shining…polo?” He noticed Robin snort at his joke, but Steve crossed his arms, defiant.

“Fuck you, it’s a Cuban collar.” Eddie’s eyes widened in surprise, which was the first big reaction Steve had been able to get from him. It’s kind of what he was going for, despite the fact he was coming off a bit aggressive. “And I don’t own any shiny clothing, that’s tacky.” He allowed the corners of his mouth to turn upwards just enough to show that he was, in fact, being a dick as a joke. Robin shot him a suspicious glance, and he knew it was only a matter of time before she figured him out, like she always did.

Steve tended to act kind of mean like this towards guys he liked.

“Please forgive my friend, it’s well past his bedtime,” Robin chimed in, sending another quick glare in Steve’s direction. 

“I’ll let it slide since he saved my ass earlier,” Eddie replied. “Good to see you, Buckley.”

“You remember me???” Steve tried not to groan at how excited Robin sounded. He really needed to calm down. None of this was really a huge deal, anyways. It had just been a long day, was all.

“Well yeah, you were the only person in English class worth talking to. Come here, doll.” Eddie pulled a completely stunned Robin into a hug - this was two unexpectedly positive interactions with people in a row for her, and entirely unprecedented. Steve felt a pang of jealousy at the idea of Eddie having a crush on Robin, or even just him flirting with her right in front of him. Why did Eddie get no sass at the term doll when Steve was always yelled at for calling her darling? It was a stupid reason to be jealous, considering Eddie had no shot with Robin, and besides, why did Steve care so much about who Eddie flirted with anyway? They literally just met.

“So you guys actually…knew each other back then?” Steve asked, confused.

“Not well or anything,” Robin clarified. “We just had one class together my Freshman year. But yeah, Corroded Coffin started in Hawkins. How do you think I learned about them?”

“Shit,” Steve said, eyebrows furrowed. “I had no idea.”

“Seriously, where the hell were you in high school?” Robin asked, annoyed.

“I know, right? It’s not like my presence was subtle,” Eddie chimed in. 

“I was…busy, alright?” Steve had been dealing with his own problems back then, so he wasn’t really in tune with a lot of what was going on at Hawkins High. He knew about the sports teams, because he was on them. He knew who hosted the best parties, and who started the chlamydia outbreak senior year - that was a wild few weeks. 

“Yeah, busy being a douchebag,” she teased. Eddie burst out laughing, which pissed Steve off even more.

He didn’t know Robin back then, but she knew him, and she made it very clear they would not have been friends. But none of that mattered, because Steve matured a lot once the stupid teen pressure of popularity, social status, and the constant need to look cool disappeared. Robin was the one who initiated all that change, basically, when they worked together the summer after he’d graduated. The rest is history.

“Well, I’m glad you came out tonight.” Eddie did not make it clear whether by you he meant you in the singular sense, as in Robin, or you in the plural, as in you all - you both. 

Despite growing increasingly annoyed with Eddie and his stupid sexy hair, Steve obviously hoped it was the latter.

-

Steve was somehow both exactly what Eddie expected while simultaneously full of surprises. Perhaps it wasn’t Steve’s actions and words that were surprising, but the way they came off. Steve was actively being an asshole, just like he had been years prior, but this time it felt less obtrusive, and a whole lot more amusing.

Fuck you, it’s a Cuban collar. That was the most ridiculous sentence Eddie had ever heard, and Steve’s sincerity made it even better. 

It must have been hot in the pit or something - Eddie noticed Steve had unfastened the button closest to his collar (the one of Cuban variety, apparently - although Eddie had never heard that term before in his life). His hair was a little more disheveled, his posture more relaxed, and the way he talked to Robin was vastly different than the way he’d appeared to Eddie before the show, or how he’d ever looked back in high school. 

Ah, shit. Eddie sighed, unable to put the stupid thought away once it had been created. Am I attracted to Steve Harrington?

Eddie tucked that thought away to deal with later, because he sure as hell wasn’t going to let it ruin his fun for the night. It’s not like he never thought about Steve’s looks - of course he did. It’s that Steve had always been attractive. He had always been known to be attractive, by everybody. It’s part of the reason Eddie hated him so much. 

And it was supposed to be the loser’s turn now - Eddie’s turn - because he was finally starting to feel confident in himself and his looks, and he was finally starting to become successful. 

Everything was coming up Eddie Munson. 

Steve Harrington and his perfect arms were irrelevant.

Eddie was extremely pleased to see Robin doing well, however. She had been in the lower ranks of popularity with Eddie, even though neither of them were ugly people or anything. Now, she obviously had more confidence (even though she was still the same in regards to her nervous energy). She was wearing a crop top, showing off her midriff. Eddie didn’t know her too well, but most people could have deduced that she would never have had the courage to wear something like that in high school. Not that she’d have been allowed to, for stupid dress code reasons, but whatever. 

“Hey, man, you ready to head out?” Eddie looked next to him to see Jeff, and realized the rest of the band had already packed everything up while Eddie was busy talking to the people at the door. It was kind of a point of contention sometimes, between him and the rest of the band, that they always seemed to do the behind the scenes cleanup while Eddie got all the credit. But it’s not that he planned it that way - the fans were the ones who would make them famous, give them money. Eddie was basically networking, although it didn’t hurt that it stroked his ego at the same time. The band, however, were being all professional and shit, which was nice too but not super metal. They’d hadn’t gotten in trouble yet or anything, and that was all because of them. 

Which was good. But Eddie couldn’t foresee himself ever missing out on these interactions outside the stage door. Just the way it was. 

“Uh, yeah,” Eddie responded. He turned back to Steve and Robin. “You guys still down to come along?”

Robin nodded, enthusiastically, which was a reaction Eddie expected. He braced himself for whatever snark Steve was going to give him - maybe he’d even make some excuse about having to go home because it was sooo late or whatever - it was literally not even 9pm. 

But, yet again, Steve surprised him.

“Yeah, where do you have in mind?”

Eddie didn’t know why Steve was so down to go out still, because of the way he’d continued to look mildly annoyed the entire night.

And then he remembered the goofy way he was jumping around, singing earlier at the show, and he figured that Steve was somewhere in there still. And that Steve seemed like a good time. 

Eddie told them their usual bar that they went to when they were in the area, and they all agreed to meet there.

-

“What the hell is wrong with you? He was being totally nice, and you were acting like a jerk for no reason.” Robin was lecturing him in her tiny green car that she loved so much as they made their way to the bar Eddie told them to go to - neither of them had been before, but she’d heard of it from a coworker and it sounded like a fun place. 

“I know, I’m sorry. I’ll be better at the bar, I promise,” Steve said. 

“You better, because this is a really cool thing to have happened to us and I’m not letting you and your stupid romantic self-sabotaging tendencies ruin it.” 

“Oh my god, it’s a mildly cool thing, Robin,” Steve insisted, before processing the rest of her sentence. There was no point in saying, what are you talking about? Because he knew. They both knew. “And I only self-sabotage when absolutely necessary.” 

“That’s a lie,” Robin scoffed. “You’re getting special treatment from an actual Rockstar just because you were in the right place at the right time. Just submit to the fact that it’s awesome, okay?”

“Okay, fine!” Steve exclaimed with his hands in the air.

“So you have a crush on Eddie Munson,” she stated. Steve groaned at the words being out in the open. “What’s the big deal? We’re not in high school anymore, and Eddie’s a good-looking guy.” 

“First of all, it’s not a crush. I barely know him,” Steve corrected.

“I think you crossed into at least acquaintance territory when he let you cut his hair,” Robin replied. Steve thought about this, and couldn’t disagree.

“It’s also when I crossed into gay panic territory,” he admitted. Robin laughed, then nodded in understanding.

“Yeah, seems like an intimate thing. I don’t know how you’ve gotten this far without wanting to bang a client before.” 

“Robin!” Steve yelled, exasperated. “We’ve been over this. It’s -”

“Extremely unprofessional, I know. Steve, you have to loosen up a bit. You’ve gotten a little…” She paused, grimacing at the hole she’d put herself in. 

“A little what?” Steve waited patiently for her to finish. She sighed.

“I’m sorry,” she prefaced. “But you’re so focused on work nowadays that we don’t have as much fun anymore. And it’s kind of like…Well, like when I first met you.”

“Noooo, you take that back,” Steve snapped, shocked. He wasn’t upset with her or anything, he just couldn’t believe he’d ever get that bad.

“Think about it,” she responded. So he did think about it. He thought about all the nights he’d stayed in, how he’d become a bit of a Debbie Downer, how he’d become less open and more judgemental. It had even been a while since he’d called and checked in on Dustin. He sighed.

“Shit. I’m sorry, Robin.” 

“Don’t sweat it, just do better. Mmkay?”

He’d do anything for Robin, literally anything. So, he was going to be the most fun he could possibly be for the rest of the night. It was one drink, with a decent band, on a Friday night, and it was going to be fun, dammit. Minor crush on Eddie Munson be damned. 

It was just a crush, right?

(Next chapter)

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Taglist: @ofherscarlettwitchways @paintballkid711 @abraca-fxckyou @allbimyself26 @jellybabiesforall @allbymyselfexceptformycactus @justaloadofgarbage-blog @alliemunsonsstuff @thefruityfours @hobbitnarwhal @calivanus @wreckmyplans-thatsmyman @antheia @goodolefashionedlovergal @lillemilly @undreamingscatworld @missmagillicuddy @steviesbicrisis @gamerdano @menamesniall @eyeslikewildflowers111 @callmesirkay @stringischeese @eds-trashmouth @mnl-enuh

[gilliesmemes]

𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐓 𝐌𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐌𝐘 𝐌𝐔𝐌 𝐇𝐀𝐕𝐄 𝐒𝐀𝐈𝐃 𝐓𝐎 𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐇 𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑    !     /    sentence starters pulled from the bullshit me and my mum have said, we are a very iconic duo if i do say so myself.   change whatever you want to suit your character interactions . trigger warning for weed refreneces . 

❛ please don’t sign me into an institution, i’ll never get out. ❜ 

❛ i’m a woman of god, but... ❜

❛ your teas should come with a free insulin shot. ❜

❛ woooow, your sarcasm is on point today. ❜

❛ okay, that was harsh, i’m sorry. ❜

❛ i don’t listen to you when i'm present here, why would i listen to you in a parallel universe ?  ❜

❛ i can’t die yet. i need to meet my vampire soulmate. ❜

❛ it’s official, i know far too much about you. ❜

❛ i’m the useless bisexual. not the bisexual that knows how to do maintenance work. ❜

❛ i don’t know what any of this shit means. ❜

❛ you can’t kill yourself, the council will try and profit off of it somehow. ❜

❛ i earned my son status today, i just felt my dick come in. ❜

❛ what the f - did your body just make that sound ? ❜

❛ before you, i had dreams - ❜

❛ it hurts to breathe ❜ / ❛ i know ❜

❛ when will people realise you can’t trust anyone ever. ❜

❛ i fucking hate everyone i’ve decided ❜

❛ are you high right now ? ❜

❛ how slowly am i moving ?  ❜

❛ you rolled and didn't tell me ? betrayal.  ❜

❛ you’re shouting. god can hear you in his study. ❜

❛ i hide my sweet stuff in the weetabix box. ❜

❛ i….yeah, right. yeah… wait, what ? ❜

❛ okay, i’m going to give you a minute before we converse, that was a shit show. ❜

❛ the awkwardness is really shining through today. ❜

❛ you’re pmsing, aren’t you ?  is that why you’re such a bitch today ?  ❜

❛ when i get cold i get violent. ❜

❛ why the fuck did you do that ?! ❜

❛ you never show concern for other people, so when you do, i worry ! ❜

❛ i feel like if i met you back when you were younger, you’d hate me. ❜

❛ i don’t ask for much and yet i constantly find myself disappointed. ❜

❛ would you hang out with me when you were younger if i was wearing this ? ❜

❛ i wonder how i’m still alive... then i think yeah, don’t pull at that thread. ❜

❛ so you came in and started talking to me... yeah what the fuck did you say to me ? i heard none of it. ❜

❛ everyone man their stations, its happening, it’s finally happening - ❜

❛ you knew i was there, thank you for at that at least. ❜

❛ it’s a fucking freakshow out there. ❜ 

[vincent-sinclair-deserved-better]

Call Me Maybe

just your local murder beans being pals

Characters: Cylas, Darrell (by @bluecoolr)

Words: 2401

Content warnings: talk about death/hunting/animal death

divider by firefly-graphics

They were solving Sudokus on their phone when a shadow fell over them, making them look up.

“Uh… are you Cylas?” A vaguely familiar voice asked, and she recognised the man from the store. He was taller than she remembered.

“Yeah, yeah. In the flesh”, she replied awkwardly. Sweet baby Jesus, how was she supposed to make it through a whole lunch? If he didn’t walk out on them, he’d at the very least never want to see them again.

It felt like they just stared at each other for hours – though it probably were only a few seconds at most – before he scratched his neck an spoke up again. “Uhm… shall we go inside then?”

“Oh, sure. Of course.” Social interactions were… an experience. But at least he hadn’t commented on or even looked at her scars – which was, albeit refreshing, also kind of odd because even the strangers walking past did. Though that might have been due to her clothes as well.

They went inside and sat down, it luckily wasn’t too crowded, and they managed to find a spot from which she could keep an overview of the place. After settling in, sorting out her skirt and bag, she grabbed her wallet and took out Darrell’s license. “You probably want this back.”

Somehow, they actually managed a smile. Darrell looked at their outstretched hand and actually seemed to blush. “Right, thank you. I hope the picture didn’t shock you too much.”

She involuntarily snorted and he looked away. “Nah, your fine. I look horrible in photographs, for real.”

“Doesn’t everyone say that?” He responded, now smiling as well. Good, he didn’t feel offended. Seemingly.

“I mean, I guess? But, like, if I smile, I look like I’m planning something, just super mischievous.” She said, butchering the pronunciation of the last word and cringing internally. “And when I keep a neutral expression, I look like I’m ready to kill someone, or like I steal the souls of the innocent. Just, blank, dead stare. I don’t have a resting bitch face; I got a resting serial killer face.”

He chuckled though for a second some kind of emotion they couldn’t discern flashed in his eyes. “Got experience with that kinda people, or killing people as a side job?”

Just as they were about to respond a server came to take their order. They stared at the table, trying to hide their embarrassment, while Darrell said they hadn’t decided yet.

“Anyway. No exciting side job, just a nurse in training.” She said with a shrug. “We should probably take a moment to look at the menu though, right?”

“Yep.” He replied. “Get whatever you want, I’m paying.”

She hesitated. “Are you sure? You really don’t have to. It’s no big deal, really.”

He just shook his head at that. “I insist.”

Since it seemed unlikely that they’d be able to change his mind, they instead focused on deciding what to get. There was just too much great looking food. Then their eyes fell on a special lunch offer.

“Oh, check this out.” She said, lying the menu in the middle of the table and leaning over. “They got this thing where you can get two burgers from this section plus big fries and nuggies. Can even make it loaded fries if you want.”

Darrell looked it over and nodded. “Sounds good to me. You want something to drink as well?”

They sat back down, only now realising they had actually said “nuggies” out loud and grateful that he ignored it. Technically, they knew what they wanted to drink, but they were worried what he would think of them. It was so much food already; would a milkshake be too much? They didn’t want him to think she was greedy or only ate junk food.

“Are you okay?” He asked, some degree of worry in his voice. “If you’re not hungry, that’s fine too.”

“No no, that’s not it.” She hastily interrupted him. “I just don’t want to be… too much?”

He furrowed his brows. “If you’re worried about the money-”

“I’m not-” They started, only to flinch at their volume. Calm down. No need to get all worked up. “It’s not… the money. I just- I feel bad if I, like, eat more than the people I’m with, if that makes sense? Sorry, it’s kinda stupid.”

He looked at her for a moment, trying to figure out whether she was being honest. “That’s not stupid at all. Just say what you want and I’ll get the same? There isn't really anything here I don’t like.”

They fixed their gaze onto their hands resting on the table. “Uh… strawberry milkshake? Or cola, that’s fine too.”

Just then, the server came back. Darrell ordered, and they couldn’t help but notice that although he ordered a milkshake for himself, he didn’t specify a flavour. “You a regular here or something?”

“Huh?” He turned his attention back to her, having just been exchanging glances with some red-haired person working in the back.

“Oh, sorry. You’re not a mind-reader.” They said, once again cringing at their word choice. Brain to mouth filter who? “I was wondering if you knew people here? Cause you didn’t specify your milkshake. But I guess it’d make sense. You live around here, right?”

He shot her a reassuring smile. “Yeah, I’ve got a friend working here. And I do live on Devil’s Peak.”

“Living on Devil’s Peak and working in the actual hell that is customer service.” They said with a grin.

“Well, gotta do what you gotta do.” He replied. “It’s not that bad, usually. Though I’ve heard quite unpleasant stories from co-workers. They think it’s cause of my height that fewer people want to mess with me.”

“Sounds fair.” They replied. “I certainly don’t have that kinda privilege.”

“Apologies if this is too intrusive, but that did sound somewhat… down? Everything alright?”

She shrugged, though her smile did retain some bitterness. “Ah, well. Not many take me seriously, I’m not seen as an authority figure. Luckily, in the ER, people who actually need urgent help don’t care much about height or hair colour and are more looking for someone in scrubs.”

“Damn, that probably sounded cold hearted.” She immediately added. “I don’t appreciate people being hurt or in pain. I’d rather be treated like a child for the rest of my life if it meant no one ever had to be in pain again. Well, good people at least.”

“Don’t worry, I get it. Didn’t think you were implying that you love wallowing in people’s suffering.”

The food arrived and they were grateful for the distraction. Their talent to turn every conversation depressing was amazing.

“Borger and nuggies.” She whispered under her breath – or so she thought, but Darrell seemed to have somehow heard it anyway and chuckled. “Lotsa nuggies even.”

She watched him cautiously, trying to determine whether he was mocking her or not, but all they could pick up was a playful twinkle in his eyes. “Indeed. Do you think the devil likes nuggies? Or the skinwalkers?”

He grinned back at her. “Not sure, but I think the hogs would. Then again, they’ll eat pretty much anything.”

"Wait, are you telling me there are no cryptids up there? Only wild piggies?” They said, putting their food down to raise their hand to their chest in an exaggerated shock gesture.

“I mean, I’ve lived there for a while and haven’t seen any, only the hogs. They’re almost like pets to me if I’m honest.”

She choked on her drink. “Pets? Don’t they, like, kill people and eat them?”

Darrell shrugged, looking completely unbothered. “If people intrude on their territory it can happen. But overall, they’re really sweet little things who won't do no harm to no one. Aside from my sweet potatoes.”

“You grow sweet potatoes?” They asked, suddenly excited. “That’s so cool. I love love love gardening, and luckily the cats don’t care much for my garden.”

Both of them were through their burgers and half the fries in record time but hardly even noticed, too invested in their now more light-hearted conversation. Cylas was almost bouncing in their seat. “You gotta share some of the potatoes with me once their ready, okay? I’ll trade you for… I don’t know, tomatoes? Herbs? I got all kinds of stuff. Oh, I’ve always wanted to make something like sweet potato fries but then I forget when I’m grocery shopping.”

“Sure thing, if I get them to survive the hogs.” Darrell replied, seeming equally excited. “And you don’t have to trade, though I won’t complain if you wanna share.”

“Man-eating hogs – the ultimate danger to gardening endeavours on Devil’s Peak. Who even cares about skinwalkers? People have to focus on the actually important things in life!” She added dramatically, and maybe a little too exuberant since she suddenly felt the tell-tale tingle of being watched.

They looked up to see the red-haired person again, gaze fixed on them this time. She kept the eye contact, until the other person turned away. Whatever that was about. When she returned her attention to Darrell, he was watching her, expression unreadable.

“Anyway,” They attempted to return to the conversation. “Any plans on how to keep your pets away? I suppose you’ve tried stuff like a fence before?”

His expression changed back to a genuine smile. “Yeah, tried pretty much everything I could find. Fences can’t stop them; they just tear them down and either avoid me for days or glare. How come your cats aren’t interested though? Don’t they like to cause mischief?”

“Oh, they sure like to be chaotic little fuckers. Just not fond of the outsides. They’re indoor cats, always have been. I prefer it that way, they can’t cause any damage to local wildlife, and I don’t gotta worried about them being hit by a car, ingesting something poisonous, or possibly even be shot.”

“Shot?” Darrell said, somewhere between shock and disbelief. Cylas gave a half-shrug. “Yeah. I mean, people can be quite awful in general and there has recently been a lady who was straight up killing people’s pets, though mostly by poisoning or capturing and drowning them. But there’s always a chance of cats or dogs being mistaken for something else and shot on accident.”

“Ah, well, guess that kind of makes sense. I can’t stand people like that, who abuse animals. Really aren’t worth the air they’re breathing.” He commented, a hint of anger in his voice. “Sometimes people come up to the peak just to hunt the hogs. Or skinwalkers. Whichever it is, I don’t mind them being eaten. If those guys fail to kill the animal it usually comes down to me to put the poor thing out of its misery, if I even manage to find it. And even though in those cases it’s for a ‘good’ cause I still hate killing them.”

“I can imagine. I hate hunters who do it without necessity. Especially if it only leads to animals suffering.” She shook her head. “People like that deserve what’s coming for them.”

He looked at her with a surprisingly gentle expression that she couldn’t quite interpret. “You really don’t mind the hogs?”

“No, why would I?”

“Well, they are dangerous.” He said. “They do hurt people.”

They shrugged. “To be completely honest, anyone dumb enough to run off into woods known for people going missing or getting hurt there kinda just has it coming. In my opinion. Play stupid games, win stupid prices or something.”

“Yeah, I agree.” He replied, before his gaze landed on the empty chicken nugget plate.

“Oh, no more nuggies.” Cylas said. “On that note, when does your break end anyway? You’re not late or anything, right?”

He checked the time. “No, not yet, though I should probably get going. After I paid.”

“Are you sure you don’t want me to pay at least part of it?” They tried again but he just shook his head. “I got it. I invited you, remember.”

They sighed. And then, with a confidence they didn’t know they possessed, they said: “Alright, alright. Can I at least give you my phone number? I actually don’t use Instagram that often. And if you’re not comfortable with me having your number you don’t gotta text me.”

“Uhm, sure.” He said, looking somewhat surprised. “Just… put your contact into my phone, I guess? Seems the easiest way.”

“Yep. You wanna save yours in mine as well, or rather not?”

“Nah, it’s fine, I’ll do it. Fair is fair.”

They exchanged numbers and Cylas waited for him to pay, before both got up and left the diner. While walking towards the door she felt eyes following her again but she didn’t bother to check.

Outside the diner, Darrell and her stood awkwardly next to each other, until she decided to break the silence. “I guess this is the point where I say goodbye, then?”

As she had hoped, it made Darrell chuckle and broke the tension. “I suppose so. Got anything excited planned for the rest of the day?”

“Nope. Checking on my plants, hanging out with the cats. The usual.” They replied. “Guess you’ll be working a couple more hours?”

“Exactly.” He said.

She gave him a half-teasing, half-sympathetic smile. “Well, then… calm rest of your shift? May you not encounter any annoying customers?”

“Thanks. Uh… do you just… want to leave now? Do we hug?” Darrell managed to get out, despite severely blushing.

“Oh, sure.” They replied, standing on their tippy-toes in order to even reach him. “I love hugs. Thanks for asking.”

His arms basically completely engulfed them, and they couldn’t help but giggle. “You’re a giant in comparison to me.”

In response, he only blushed even harder.

“Sorry, I’m just teasing. Have a nice rest of your shift for real, don’t let me keep you any longer. Don’t want you to get into trouble just cause of me.” Cylas said, still grinning up at him.

He rubbed his neck, struggling to meet her eyes. “Yeah, thanks again. Guess I’ll see you around?”

“Or text me when you arrive at the station safely. Bikes like that are dangerous.”

“I’ll be careful.”

“You better.” She said before turning away to go to her car.

This had been decidedly more fun than expected, and she was almost glad that he had lost his driver’s license.

to be tagged or not to be tagged, that is the question:

@rottent33th @slaasherslut @cries-in-latino @kalid-raven @angxlslasher @the-pinstriped-hood

[ncdyc]

HSHQAC2022 DAYFOURTEEN

look i love viani, i love vikke, i love annexei, but valias has my heart. the main common denominator here is martha and honestly i think that’s poetic because i joined this group in 2016 because of her wc anyway and i’m a sentimental bitch.

it’s not very difficult to be a vanamo stan. we saw her first and we were in awe of how realistic she was. we could all relate to her, half the time she was confused, but she never let a single person doubt her to the level that they could have. she had every reason to be angry, bitter, broken, and was so close to several corruptive influences, but she showed up each time, unapologetically being herself, dressing within her means and held her head high on her own, with no one next to her and a child in tow. you can question her methods all you want, but she saved lives with her choices.

when elias was just a wc, he was that laughing face in a graphic, maybe we all came up with a peripheral version of him in our heads; happy, full of light and life, the sun that went so well with vanamo’s moon. when lea brought elias, that light had been snuffed out, yet preserved somehow at least for me. it was a reminder that things don’t necessarily stay peachy, but a person can still be recognisable through something so traumatic. it was a reality check and i respect the commitment to play him that way despite the temptation to gloss over the difficult ugly bits. every single interaction between vanamo and elias in play was nuanced, well-written, gut-wrenching and real. they felt like a pendulum, their arguments were never set in stone and they vacillated from end to end together. this was a couple that truly demonstrated that the only way is through, not out.

their politics are so different, but while there are struggles and arguments, the relationship withstands conflicting ideologies. we never got to see it, but i have to believe that they are still navigating the waters, with elias continuing to be very pro-finnish and less in alignment with russian agenda, and with vanamo continuing to fulfill her duties to the russian royal system. death failed to do them apart, why would this?

i think we glamourise a lot of things that we don’t see for most fairytale couples, but this is one couple that i think, i am not alone in glamourising even after we’ve seen them in the flesh. martha and lea call them mundane, but honestly i would happily consume valias watching paint dry, because with them, there’s always going to be something deeper, something intangible we’ll all feel from it.

also they have a bangin’ haunting angsty playlist and that’s the way to my heart tbh, valias is my favourite, thank you for reading

also i did not make this graphic, my laptop screen is fucked i can’t do much on it besides type, all credit goes to lenny — also a valias stan.

pls comment with your valias thoughts because they make me happy <3

[earlyevenings]

about the final volume..

okay, first of all;

SURESH IMPROVISED THAT SPEECH? jesus christ, perks of having a lawyer boyfriend i guess. That was the best speech we've seen yet in my honest opinion. Breathtaking.

now, let's get started;

as i said before, the writing sucks.

justice for lulu. my girl deserved to stay

suresh is being giga melty. i don’t think we’ve ever had a love interest simp like that over us. eat your heart out, reddit, our man love us.

‘someone’s smiling down on me today 😊’ had no business being this cute btw 😭

sex was.. well.. underwhelming to say the least, but i’m not exactly surprised.

loved the amount of kisses we got, hate the way they were written.

i can’t stress this enough, the writing absolutely sucks, SO MANY ERRORS

kat’s being a bitch, per usual, except the next scene she’s being nice. And then the next scene she’s a bitch again. And then she’s.. nice again? Make up your mind boo

‘yolo’? ‘nsfw’? ‘raw animalistic display’? are you serious?

dana and alfie, please take a fucking hint, i’m begging you. I.DONT.WANT.YOU.

suresh's speech was a masterpiece.

mc's speech however?... girl, you could do much better

FUCKING HELL THE PROPOSAL, that was so embarrassing you guys 😭 why would they ever think it was a good idea WHY.

episode 42 was a disgrace.

it doesn’t sit right with me that nobody told kat about finn flirting with us and literally trying to bone us behind her back

oh bobby… what have they done to you…

the fact that we couldn’t actually see our best bits… so disappointing

suresh getting mad at bobby is sending me 💀💀

why do i imagine suresh just looking at mc with heart eyes, clinging to her and agreeing with everything she says like a puppy. man is down bad

the interview with bobby feels so robotic. THATS NOT HOW REAL PEOPLE INTERACT

the bit about suresh wanting to be a celebrity? not canon. not canon at all. resh, baby, you’re a lawyer, not an influencer.

WHERE’S THE AFTER PARTY??????

overall, i'm very glad we finally got to spend some time with our love interest. it's just a shame that every single conversation we had with them (with suresh at least) was about how happy they are that we're together. like, yes baby, i know you're very sorry, and i know you feel lucky that i gave you a chance, and YES i do want to be together and i do see a future with you. if i didn't, i wouldn't have picked you for christ's sake. can we please talk about something else?

i feel like they just tried to squeeze in every single ounce of love they had into these final episodes to somehow, idk, make up? for the lack of one-on-one happy time with the love interests this season. but they didn't have to bomb us with the same conversation every few minutes... i would still like to see some couple dynamic yk

i honestly don't think we're getting a reunion, feels like they've given up on them (hope i'm wrong). it's a shame, cause i feel like it's absolutely needed to actually let us enjoy the time with the lis.

i did love that the first two episodes were so long tho, it would've felt even more rushed if they kept them short like the rest of the season.

[imnotreal-png]

>:) -- Entry 1

OK i just smoked a joint after i wrote the date and now im kinda chillin but imma still yap on dis hoe.

I am a loser. Like a huge loser, okay? Like im not dumb or wtv, i may have reached a weird and insane level of self awareness, but im just as much of a loser as anyone else.

I keep catching myself trying to people please and overstepping my boundaries and justifying it with "oh everyone else does it, so what, its normal" like ok dumb bitch that doesn't make it okay, get a grip.

But i will be yapping away abt alot of stupid bullshit i deal with and stupid things make me sad. I am very well aware that I am irrational, but these are things i feel in those moments that i always hold in because i don't want people 2 see that weak side of me. It's embarrassing and it's not me.

In truth, i have nooo idea what i'm doing. I have 0 clue on where i'll be in the future. I didn't think i'd make it this far and not on some suicidal shit (idk if u can say that word here, oops.), i just genuinely thought that i'd somehow perish?? Like i wasn't really real in some weird way. I just didn't exist. Even though i was always the center of drama or the cause of all things chaotic, i was always misunderstood. god that's so fucking cringe but hear me out.

I always said shit that i believed was clear enough to be understood and yet it wasn't. Even my tone apparently has been rude this entire time. But no one would actually tell me how i come off, they just ate it up in silence and then spaz on me. Even now i don't really understand because i truly believe i am very clear on what im saying. Yet it's still...not seen the way im trying to show it? Idk if im making any sense bruh but whatever. Maybe im narcissistic but no one understands my brain the way i attempt to express it...or i guess how i see it. Idk i guess im just frustrated that no one understands me or gets my brain.

Also it's super cringe when people tell me im mature for my age. Literally eat my shit. actual ick. get away from me.

I hate my mom. She hates me too but she hates me bc I'm not the pussy she wishes she was when she was my age. She's the most childish person i know. I genuinely do not care what she thinks of me whatsoever. She's just power hungry and immature. Actually, I don't even hate her, i just hate that she gets to have all this power over me. I just want my freedom, thats it. She can hate my lifestyle or whatever the fuck, as long as im not living with her. At the end of the day, im truly content with who i am as a person and my moral compass etc, she cant affect that. I just need to have my own space and leave her household to finally be free and actually experience life in a comfortable and more peaceful way. I guess that's all i can say rn. I just wish she would respect my boundaries and stop treating me like im her competition and she'll always be superior. She won't and i cannot wait for the day she finally see's that lol.

!! super irrational moment alert !!

LMAO this is super cringe but like when i started music i put "listen 2 my moozik" in my bio bc we say muzik in albanian but americans wud have 2 read it as moozik to get it right + its funny? Ever since i started rlly getting exposure and performing out there, all these NON SLAVS/BALKANS have started putting it in their bio's 🙄 like be fr, its sooo obvious (at least to me). And now some of these mfs i've interacted w startes stealing my lingo and the way i type [this isn't how i type when i txt friends. its worse and i shorten everything in a miserable way cuz its funny] and it's cute at first but now mfs on social media posting the way i do and talking the way i do. [insert side eye bc yeah] and it's kinda cringe cuz they're actually rlly shallow and mainstream people, they just look like they trying 2 hard to be quirky. lol.

im probably tweakin tho idk.

i wish i grew up with art. i wish my parents had that and were able to introduce it to me. I feel like a fraud when i try to be creative and do things. Even with making music. As much as i enjoy it and love it and it really does make me happy, it feels fake. I can't play any instruments, i can't sing, im far from a good writer, fuck if know anything abt music theory...i literally just click buttons and make sounds on my computer lol. I didn't grow up indulging in art and creativity, i was actually always super bad at it. I wish i had a deeper connection with it. I wish i understood it better. I wish i expressed it better. I wish my ideas were my own. I want to be able to create something that is truly mine without feeling like im a fake.

UHHHH so imma just come on here and vent whenever i feel like i have something i need 2 say. This is intended for the void, if u come across it...cringe.

[leanderswife]

so after playing the demo a few times (though I've not seen all it has to offer yet) I have some Criticisms that I felt like rambling about

First of all, I think the MC brushes off the horrific carnage they witnessed wayyyy too easily. I would have liked for that incident to make a bigger impact on them. You'd think after seeing a ton of people get ripped to shreds in front of you, you'd be a little more affected by it, is all I'm saying.

Second this one is dumb and petty lol... but I honestly didn't like that one line where it was like "I've kissed, been embraced by, and more by people before" cuz it gives off big "NUH UH YOUVE FUCKED BEFORE YOU'RE NOT SOME BLUSHING HUMAN CONTACT-LESS VIRGIN" like that'd be a bad thing somehow. I think it, again, would have been waaayyy more impactful to the scene if MC hadn't had much human touch or contact at all. Also my asexual/demi self was uncomfortable with the implication. I just find it super unromantic in games where MC has been implied to have been in a lot of relationships before. It's just way more romantic if the LI is their first and only love... but maybe I'm just a hopeless romantic like that u_u

I also didn't like the implication cuz like... I thought the MC was considered something of a monster? They even mention they aren't used to compliments. I can't really imagine a moment where they would have been able to get close enough to someone for makeout sessions and fucking. IDK It just ruined a tender moment with Leander for me, like bitch I don't wanna think about my exes while I'm tenderly touching Leander's hand.

EDIT: It's not like it bothered me when Leander was implied to Fuck. Again this is just a Me thing, but I don't mind it if the LI has had relationships before, I just dont really like imagining my MC having failed relationships in the past cuz it just makes me uncomfortable. Weird personal thing! Still would prefer it if that line was changed/removed because regardless that would have been a way more impactful scene to me if the MC has had very little physical interaction with people before... and more romantic uwu

Lastly... I think it's too short. IDK, it feels like scenes end way too fast and I don't really have a moment to enjoy what's happening. I think in particular the scene with Ais at that spring... can't remember exactly what it's called right now. It felt too... crammed in? if that makes sense? Just kind of a breakneck pace and it felt like it was Too Much for what time we'd been given. Just suddenly we're walking back into the outskirts after that traumatic experience (or what SHOULD have been a traumatic experience, again MC recovers from that way too quickly and this scene really hits that home for me) and just as fast we're ushered out back into the city. I know it's at least acknowledged we are kicked out too fast by Ais but I still think that whole scenario either needed to be longer or needed to be cut entirely and replaced with a different introduction scene for Ais.

EDIT AGAIN tbh I think what would help is if the demo took place over two days instead of just one. That way Ais's scene would feel less crammed in, at least to me. Like damn at least give MC a day before they go wandering back out to the outskirts after what happened to them lmao

But this is all just my Opinions... maybe I'm just being nitpicky, and it's not like I didn't enjoy the demo, just that I think it has room for improvement.

[blakelywintersfield]

having social anxiety and RSD is just like... “I am afraid to approach, and afraid to respond” so you simultaneously never start and never continue conversation so your lack of social circle is literally your own fault

[kingdaddydaichi]

can i request consensual hate sex between bakugou and f!reader

Oooooh yassssss! This idea got better and better the more I thought about it, Nonny. Love it! I hope you enjoy this naughty little slice of grudge fuck pie. 💖

Riding The Fine Line 💥 Katsuki Bakugou x f!reader 💥 NSFW

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT or I'll have my Big Scary BoomBoom Man blow your little ass up!

Word Count: 2k

"Oi! Who picked this shitty restaurant anyway?", Bakugou sneered as he walked towards the table.

You rolled your eyes and mumbled, "Oh look, Gorilla Man is here".

"Watch it, shitty girl. M'not in the mood for your shit tonight".

You'd made plans earlier in the week to meet Kiri and Mina for dinner. You knew Bakugou had been invited too, but after having suffered through it so many times over the past year or so of having some friends in common, you somehow managed to tolerate his presence. It helped that the drink you'd been sipping on made him somewhat less intolerable than usual.

It was like nails down a chalkboard every time Bakugou reared his big dumb head. His only redeeming quality was that he was quite easy on the eyes. Shame that such a hot guy is also such a huge asshole.

He's always given everyone a hard time, but unlike most people, you just wave a dismissive hand at him. And it makes him crazy. He doesn’t understand why he doesn’t get under your skin like he so easily does others. Oh, he annoys the piss out of you to be sure, but he doesn't hurt your feelings per se.

"Y'know, for such a massive ego yours sure is delicate, you meat head".

"Oh yeah? Well, for such a massive ass yours s-"

"God, Bakugou, do you ever just shut up?", you snipped.

Kiri and Mina both jumped in, laughing nervously and smoothing things over to lower the tension. He growled at you. You flipped him a subtle bird before looking away and trying to ignore him.

💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥

Kiri's birthday was approaching and several of his friends decided to throw him a surprise birthday party. You, Denki, Mina, and ugh, as luck would have it, Bakugou, were are all put in charge of decorating his house while some other friends took him out for dinner. Midway through, Mina whined while sorting through various sacks, "Oh no! We forgot the disposable rainbow shot glasses!" Mina had a way of putting a cute touch on everything she had her hands in. Denki offered to go with Mina to procure the missing miniature party cups, leaving you and Bakugou alone to hang streamers in Kiri's living room. Probably not the wisest of decisions, but consider the source. 👀

It didn't take long after they were gone for Bakugou to start in on you with his bullshit. Only this time no one was around to referee. You groaned. This was going to be a free for all. You'd already both cut eyes at each other a couple of times.

"You're not doing it right, dumbass!"

"That's a matter of opinion and you can shove yours up your ass, dumbass".

He flipped you off saying, "You can shove this up your ass!", then turned back to his task.

You were so done. Without thinking, you reared back and hurled the roll of streamers as hard as you could, nailing him right in the back of the head. Damn, it felt good.

He whipped around, a vein popping out of his forehead, clenching his teeth. You were quite proud of your aim until he made little explosions in his free hand and said, "You're really pushing your luck with me, woman! If we weren't in Kiri's house right now I'd blast you right through that fucking wall!"

"Pfft, whatever! You wouldn't do shit. You're all bark and no bite, you fucking douche canoe!"

"You ever stop to think that maybe if you weren't such a bitch guys might actually want to talk to you?"

That did it. He'd finally found one of your hot buttons and you couldn't take his shit anymore. You marched right up to him and got right up in his face, height difference be damned.

"You know what, fuck you, Bakugou! I'm not normally like this! You're the only person who…drives me to this madness!", you spat with tears in your eyes.

A second later, his hands were on either side of your face, crashing his lips down onto yours. You were so shocked you froze before pulling away from him, staring at him in astonishment. He just stood there, huffing, glaring back at you, waiting.

You stepped forward and pushed him, his back hitting the wall, hard. But before he could protest, your lips were on his again. He grabbed you by your arms and spun you around, pinning you against the wall. You slipped your tongue past your open mouth, his meeting yours halfway as he pushed his knee between your legs. He pressed his thigh against your sex, shoving his growing cock against your thigh in the process.

Taking the bottom of his shirt into two fistfuls, you eagerly pushed it up to his chest, exposing his washboard abs and god-like pecs. He quickly pulled it over his head and threw it to the floor while your shaky hands got busy with his belt and zipper, urgently, like you couldn't get to him soon enough. But his will took over when he grabbed your wrists and pinned them above your head so he could peel your shirt off. He dipped down to take a mouthful of your tit, cupping what he couldn't fit in his rough hand, swirling his tongue around your nipple, sucking, then releasing you from the inside of his mouth to flick the tip of his tongue over your pink nub. You grabbed two handfuls of his ash blond locks and arched your back off the wall as he gave your other breast the same treatment.

You impatiently tugged on his hair, hungry for the taste of his sweet lips again. Your tongues once again fought for dominance and you gasped when he picked you up in one swift movement. You wrapped your legs around his waist as he carried you to Kiri's bedroom, swinging the door shut behind him before slamming your back against it.

"Put me down", you said forcefully.

He stopped sucking on your neck long enough to rasp, "And why the fuck should I?"

"Because I want to get into your fucking pants, asshole".

For once you two agreed on something and with your feet back on the floor, you got back to work on his pants before reaching in and wrapping your hand around his hot dick. Shit, you could barely get your fingers all the way around it, it was so thick. You stroked him a couple of times before pulling him out, exposing his manhood in all of its mouth-watering glory.

He ran his hand down his sculpted stomach, spreading his fingers to either side of his girth. "Like what you see?" You realized you were staring at his dick and the pre that dripped from it.

"Wouldn't you like to know?", you sassed.

He growled and spun you around, pushing your front against the wall and swiftly closing in behind you. Wisps of your (color) hair fluttered around his hot breath as he breathed down your neck. "You keep on tryin' to hide it, but you want me just as much as I want you, princess, and I'm gonna make an honest girl outta ya".

His battle-hardened hands found their way down your back, around your waist and all the way to your belly before he slid them down, his fingers reaching below your waistband. You willed him to push his hands further down, pressing your backside against his erection. He used one deft hand to unbutton your pants and work your zipper down, granting himself better access. When he mercifully slipped his middle finger between your folds, you couldn't choke back the moan that emerged from the back of your throat.

"Damn", he growled behind your ear, "for someone who can't stand me, your pussy sure is wet for me".

"Shut up", you gritted through your teeth.

The feeling of the rough pad of his finger teasing your swollen clit nearly sent you over the edge. But it was short-lived and you whined when he pulled his hand away to shove your pants down around your ankles, accompanied by your damp panties. Your hands slid down the wall as he yanked your ass back towards him. You hung your head and watched the head of his cock as Bakugou fucked your thighs, back and forth over your slit, coating his fat cock with your slick, readying himself.

When he began pushing into you, your legs shook from the sheer pressure as he slowly filled you up. When he bottomed out, he held himself still, at least considerate enough to give you time to adjust to his size. He waited until you started grinding against him before grabbing your hips, and slowly withdrawing.

"Now let's see if I can fuck all that hate for me out of you". Before you could retort, he slammed his cock back into you, your pitiful cry mixed with his loud groan echoing off the walls of Kiri's bedroom. He set his pace, steady and hard, the cold buckle of his open belt pressing into your skin with every crash of his hips.

"Yeah, who knows? Maybe if you'd get your dick wet every once in a while you wouldn't act like one", you quipped, voice faltering as he pounded into you.

He slowed his pace to bend over you, pushing your hair out of the way before biting down on the nape of your neck.

"Oww!! What the fuck?!"

He stood up straight again, laughing and said, "All bark and no bite, hah? You just hadn't pushed me far enough yet!" The sweet and salty mixture of his sweat and your need could be heard with every loud slap of his skin against yours.

"Fuck! Bakugou-", you whined in spite of yourself.

He grabbed a fistful of your hair and gave it a firm tug. "When're ya gonna stop callin' me by m'last name and call me Katsuki instead?"

"When you stop acting like a raging asshole towards me", you managed as he fucked the breath out of you.

"Brave words for someone in such a compromising position. Now - say - my - fucking - name!". Each word came with its very own plunge of his cock into your mess of a cunt.

Your legs started to give out. "Katsuki!" You hadn't meant to obey him, but he'd kept his word and made you honest.

"That's better". You could hear the smirk in his voice after hearing his first name fall from your quivering lips.

You turned to face him when he pulled out, kissing him hard, his fingers going into your hair. You inched backwards onto the bed, Katsuki crawling in towards you with a primal look in his crimson eyes before nestling his thighs between yours and sheathing himself deep inside you again. Your head rolled back as you arched your back off the bed. Gods, the feeling of him filling you up was quickly becoming your new favorite sensation.

He nuzzled his face against your neck as he rutted into you, pulling your thigh up to his hip bone, raking his teeth against your skin. His breathing had become more labored and he started thrusting faster, your pleasure mounting with the increased friction of his pubic bone against your clit until rays of bliss shot out from every pore of your skin at the speed of light.

"K-ka-tsuki, I'm c-cumming hahh oh goddd!" The pulsating grip that you had on him finally sent him to his end as well, growling your name and cursing between clenched teeth, burying himself deep inside you as he unloaded rope after thick rope of his white hot cum into your snug, soft warmth.

"Seems Shitty Hair’s gonna get more than one surprise tonight", Katsuki said, catching his breath.

You laughed so hard that Katsuki hissed at the feeling of your walls squeezing his sensitive cock so soon after his orgasm.

"You still hate me?", he asked, brushing his lips against yours, supporting his weight with his elbows.

"Hmm...that depends", you said thoughtfully, tracing the cut of his back muscles with your fingertips.

"On what?"

"On whether or not you'd still fuck me if I don't hate you".

He smirked. "I'd still hit it even if you love me", he whispered, showing his softer side as he kissed you, smiling.

[neoriots]

I've been talking about this with a friend of mine and mizkif has to have like some sort of magic spell to still have people interacting with him like he's not a 100% piece of shit that does nothing but uses people. In every community there's one of them just a huge fucking cunt that you are shocked that everyday people choice to talk with them. At least with train it was somewhat of a build up but mizkif???? Wtf is he??? He's there and makes everything actively worse no matter what yet every single person on twitch has somehow been next to him by choice like HOW.

This is why so many people just stick with mcyt because go outside that for a second it's literal hell on earth. Pokimain actually really wants her audience to just be young girls, she speaks very openly on seeing that shift in her community to being that has made her extremely happy and comfortable but sadly she doesn't play Minecraft she's actually good at the shooty games so even her actively trying to just make a nice little safe space for the girls has been hell AND IT USED TO BE WORSE. Every guy on twitch will tell you that the mcyt community is one of the only ways non cis straight men have any acknowledgement in the twitch community but they always act stupid as too why is that like it's not one of the only groups that want fans to feel safe. Only the mcyts and Jerma and that's because Jerma is the only bitch out here with a backbone to call out his chat when when they're being in your face phobic and then people turn around again going "why does Jerma have so many trans fans???? Why does Jerma have a lot of woman fans??" Just acting stupid like he doesn't do the basics in making sure people feel safe and welcomed I hate twitch actually so mad I see this conversation on loop for years now

(sorry if this is a lot and you are tired)

yeah you absolutely nailed it.

i often think of that clip of poki saying that without the mcyt tide changing twitch for the better (as much as it could) she considered quitting. like that makes me so fucking sad and upset.

not to get on my soapbox again but this is why the JM thing upset me so fucking much because if he opened his eyes for one goddamn second and stopped acting like he was being attacked for no reason, he would have been able to tell miz was NOT just “stating a fact” he is a misogynist and he was making fun of women for having a safe space on that fucking platform. and that’s what we’ve been saying about his jokes like that and from other streamers for YEARS. but no, we’re just hysterical women with internalized misogyny we need to get over. be fucking real.

a lot of these male streamers pretend to be good ally’s to women and minorities but they refuse to do the very basics of calling out and cutting off their terrible friends and associates. it makes me sick.

i’ve been on twitch a long time, and i’ve been in the gaming community online since i was about 8 so none of this shit shocks me anymore and i Know what the underbelly of this community looks like—but the fact that even the “good” side looks like this still now is just, horrifying.