#I don't know what the hell I do with the tags

[harpieisthecarpie]

Thanks for the peer review o7 i will use this power for ramble

I do think that a lot of the fic sex/romance issues were started in a genuine push to not spread misinformation, bc iirc fics used to parrot a lot of common myths re: intercourse (even moreso than now), especially ones about non-"traditional" non-cishet practices. And safety. And anatomy.

Which, it's cool and good to see a push for sex positivity and education! But I do feel there's now a pressure (internal or external) for the sexual aspects of fic to be textbook safe, sane, and consensual in all avenues.

I have 2 main reasons (beyond fic ≠ sex ed) that the squeaky clean route shouldn't be our only route. Which are: characterization, and erotica vs romance.

Firstly, characterization:

Intimacy can be an amazing way to explore characters, a relationship, or even a setting in your story. You can miss out on a lot by treating sex as simply a lesson rather than a tool in your narrative toolbelt!

Tbh I think the reason gen z ppl (like me) often say we "hate sex scenes" in media is bc they feel unnecessarily explicit or unnecessary in general, and we often don't have the language for what the problem is. Or we misattribute the ickiness to sex scenes happening at all!

I'm grayace and they can be boring af, or sometimes creepy as hell for reasons unrelated to the narrative (stop auteur directors now! /hj).

But one of my fave fave fave book series is the Binding Light trilogy by Freya Marske (I think the author's on tumblr actually), in which the sex scenes are narratively pivotal. And I, the sex scene hater, love the series sm I didn't even have to look up the title or author just now!! Unheard of!!!

These books are so dear to me bc the intimate scenes mirror both the (wonderful, superb) magic system AND the characters' relationships! Their sexual vulnerability and connection evolves alongside the characters' development. I've never before rambled about breathplay as a metaphor for trust, but Marske had me writing ESSAYS. My apologies to my friends' DMs

At first I had skipped those sex scenes, but once I had to go back for plot info, actually reading them made me go "oh holy shit this is all important".

I think stories miss that relevence pretty often. You don't NEED to have sex scenes, but also you CAN have them wherever it feels right.

IMO It's important to treat intimacy (of all kinds) in a work as character exploration first, rather than purely mile markers or something for characters (and writers) to "get a good grade in"

Moving on to erotica vs romance:

I've recently been watching a lot of SAVY WRITES BOOKS on youtube, and in one of her CoHo reviews she talked about the difference between works labelled "erotica" and "romance".

To her, romance novels have a sense of realism, they exist in a world that functions (at least adjacently) like ours. A romance would treat consent and safe sex like we do irl (or some historical equivalent based on setting). Basically, characters wouldn't be able to smash in a subway car without getting charged with public indecency.

Thus, if the characters were practicing BDSM, they would on some level acknowledge they're performing a scene (ex. consent check-ins and safewords). Here we have some level of RACK. Or if its unhealthy, there's framing acknowledging that fact!

Whereas erotica exists inside that BDSM scene! An erotic fic that tags its kinks and content correctly has given you enough for you to have informed consent. If you read the fic, you will thus be reading the "fantasy" of a BDSM scene. We know this isn't necessarily realistic or healthy, and that's fine! We read it with the knowledge it's not meant to be!

Uhhhh so. This was a really long way for me to explain "fanfic isn't sex ed so it's fine if they don't always use contraceptive"

tl;dr Intimacy and sex are cool for characterization. And smut is a Scene, if a person is informed of its contents all consent is accounted for :)

author’s notes today: hey guys so just a warning there isn’t 100% explicit verbal consent even though they’re both really into it so remember this is FICTION, also they don’t use a condom :((( but in real life safe sex is important!!! please be safe out there everyone

a/n back in the day: kept thinking about ____ stabbing knives through both of _____’s hands to pin him in place while they fucked so here you go lol =P

[hydrobunny]

everyone thinks that they know us

tags: confessions, getting together, friends to lovers

a/n: written from the idea made by the amazing @yangx2isawhore :3

--------------------

it's exactly 11:34pm when the ringing of your phone wakes you up.

jolting up from your bed, you blearily glare at your phone screen. the contact name of SHIDOU‼️ burns into your eyes.

you hang up.

a second later, it rings again.

"what."

"y/n!" as always, shidou's voice is just a little too loud for it to be acceptable. "how mad would you be if i killed rin right now?"

you pause. you look at the time. you consider the probability of him telling the truth.

"pretty mad."

"great!" and you can hear the grin in shidou's voice as he recites out an address. "you can come save him then."

although you were the one that had tried so hard to befriend rin itoshi, you were pretty certain that you hadn't signed up for whatever the hell this was.

you pull up at the address at a sharp 12:02 am, annoyance already settling in underneath your eyes.

the address is a mansion (why would you ever expect anything else), and the recognizable bass of party music blasts through the windows. at least a dozen different colored sports cars (you consider how much one would sell for) are parked outside of it.

you debate turning around. unfortunately, you think shidou might actually be serious about killing your best friend.

best friend. how did you get to this point? friend. didn't matter that you might have been in love with him- rin could never see you as anything more.

you knock on the door.

a man you might be able to recognize if you cared enough answers. his dual-colored eyes flit over you with interest.

"hey there, pretty," he says, and his voice is slurring with the unmistakeable touch of alcohol. "don't think you're on the invite list, but i can make an exception."

you scowl. "no thank you. shidou called me to come?"

he cocks his head. "what could someone like you possibly have anything to do with that psycho?"

"he-"

the psycho in question slams into two-eye's side, whooping. "took you long enough!"

you sigh.

shidou ryusei grins at you, positively buzzing with energy. the smell of cheap (why cheap? genuinely, why did he buy cheap alcohol?) beer lingers around his face.

"did you kill rin yet?"

the grin immediately wipes itself from his face. "getting there."

he whirls around, a warm hand latching around your own- and then he's pulling you through the hallways of this too-big house.

the music hasn't stopped for a second since you've got here. in many of the rooms, you can spot groups of vaguely recognizable people, all of them in various states of buzzed-to-plastered.

you wonder how professional athletes weren't any better than the frat boys that threw weekend parties. (well, the age range was pretty much the same)

"where are we?" you manage to shout into shidou's ear, as he pulls you further away from the heart of the party.

"sae's house!" he yells back.

"what?"

the two of you slam into another room- shidou shuts the door with too much force - and the music fades away into background noise.

rin's head snaps up at your entrance.

"rinrin!" shidou crows. "brought you another babysitter!"

rin stares at you with genuine confusion. his eyes are hazed over, his cheeks a light red. "what? y/n?" a red solo cup, ominously empty, sits by his hand.

"yes, yes," shidou replies, pushing you forward. "the only person who can somehow tolerate your presence is here!"

you slip out of shidou's grip. "what the hell is happening?"

he rolls his obnoxiously bright eyes at your question. "little itoshi's weirdly drunk and incoherent. which means big itoshi has to pretend like he cares. which means i can't force big itoshi to drink an enormous amount of alcohol! so now you have to watch this idiot!"

"i am not drunk," rin snarls towards shidou. "and i don't need a babysitter."

he attempts to get up from the counter he's perched on, and immediately wobbles. you debate whether it would be worth laughing.

before you can make a decision, another side door opens.

and sae itoshi meets your gaze with bored indifference.

"what- you!"

he raises an eyebrow. you're not sure how you got into this situation.

you wonder how you're supposed to react to meeting the one and only brother you've heard rin talk so much about.

some inner part of you immediately doesn't like him. the other part immediately notices how similar they look, and curse their sheer attractiveness.

either way, sae loses the little interest he had in you immediately, turning towards shidou. "is this-" he waves a hand towards you. "her?

shidou nods furiously. "junior is perfectly cared for now. now let's get out of here!"

rin glares at all three of you.

sae sighs. for someone who's supposed to be the host, he doesn't look thrilled at the prospect of socializing.

the elder itoshi turns his attention onto the younger. "you're fine with her?"

rin's eyes narrow further. he doesn't respond.

shidou takes that as his cue. his hands place themselves on sae's shoulders. "good talk, everyone!"

and with another slammed door, you are left alone with rin. it's more than a little awkward.

you open your mouth- he shoots you a glare. you can take a hint. (even if it breaks your heart.)

out of a bored curiosity, and maybe a little spite, you start opening cabinets. they're mostly empty (you wonder what kind of life sae lives).

rin's gaze follows you the entire way. it's intense enough to give you goosebumps.

eventually, you come across a pot of gold- a wine bottle, its cork untapped. there's a ribbon attached to its neck; you spy the JFU logo placed on top.

"he won't mind, right?" you ask.

silence follows.

you open the bottle. if you're going to be stuck here anyways, why let it go to waste?

surprisingly, it's rin that talks first. "why'd you come?" he mumbles out, stumbling over a syllable.

you shrug, taking another mouthful of the wine. (it's good. too good. damn rich people.) "shidou said he was gonna kill you."

“shidou has your number? you responded? why'd you care?" he blurts out in a tsunami of words. immediately after, he looks away with reddening ears.

you eye him with slowly growing amusement. there's a buzzing in your stomach that's slowly stripping your self control away. "yes. and yes. and because we're friends."

rin tch's, still refusing to meet your eyes. you think he'll keep talking, but he doesn't.

so you take another swig of the wine bottle. maybe rin can be the one to reach out for once.

but- like always- you're the first to crack. after a possible fifteen minutes of brooding silence, you sigh.

"what's going on with sae?"

rin's gaze snaps to your face. "what about him?"

you raise your brows. (you think you meant to raise only one. you can't really tell.) "i thought he didn't fuck with you."

rin's face scrunches at your words. "what?"

you groan, sliding down from your perch onto the floor. "you know? i thought- well, he looks like he cares."

he stands up. "he doesn't."

"sure."

he stares at you with a complicated expression, and then makes his way over to you. you blink up at him.

"i don't like you talking to him," rin says, seemingly more lucid than before.

"wasn't really my choice." you shoot him a smile, raising a hand. he lifts you up to standing with it.

from how close you now are, the two of you are almost touching. if you weren't as delirious on wine as you are now, this would be much more distressing.

even now, it takes all of your will to maintain eye contact with him.

"you don't like me talking to him?" you mumble out.

rin tilts his head. "no."

"can i ask why you came here then? or why you got plastered off cheap booze?"

he opens his mouth, then stops. and then- "you're not doing much better."

you clear your throat. more than the wine, it's rin who's clouding your thoughts. his faint cologne- so much more evident at this distance- intoxicates you.

"that didn't answer my question."

his eyes narrow. "i felt like it."

you frown. "what situation are you in that made you want to get drunk with shidou?"

and his eyes flicker down. to your lips.

"what do you think?"

you stumble; rin's hand places itself in the small of your back. signature itoshi teal burns.

you're both drunk. you're in his brother's house. and yet-

and yet, you're both here, and rin itoshi is leaning down into you.

his lips meet yours desperately, his breath catching over and over again. your hands tangle into his hair- he groans wordlessly.

you separate with a gasp.

"are you- what?" you manage, face ablaze.

rin looks just as disheveled. "y/n."

"rin."

he steps back, eyes roving from wall to wall. "fuck. fuck, im sorry. i thought-"

that's not the right words you wanted to hear. you step forward, the wine bottle long forgotten behind.

"you thought right," you blurt.

rin stares at you. a flush sits over his face.

"i thought you wanted to just be friends. that- that you didn't want me." you say.

surprise, and horror, flicks in his eyes. "what?"

you cough out a laugh. "not very smart off the field, are you?"

rin's mouth opens and closes, much like a fish. you think he's going to speak-

he closes the gap between you two, and his lips meet yours again.

between gasps, he mumbles a "i could never not want you." into your form.

and you sigh out your own declaration of love

somewhere in the house, a door slams. someone whoops in exhilaration.

but in this room, it's just you and rin. alcohol tinges both of your breaths. you're both drunk on something bigger.

[1864reruns]

ㅤㅤㅤ౨ৎ ace & dog privileges

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ2024 ©1864RERUNS

includingㅤ━ㅤportgas d. ace

tag(s)&warning(s). drabble, fem/afab! reader, established relationship, creep, reader has BOOBS, i'm sorry flat chesters, this ain't for you, crack treated so seriously, this is not nearly as poetic as my other drabbles sorry, pervert! ace

from vyon. nasty dog but he's tamed so it's okay! 🎀 THIS IS SO STUPID I'M SORRY LMFAO

he's so focused on you that it takes him a second— his attention never divided when you're in front of him, or, well divided onto other things. ace was doing his best, listening to you and staring at your chest equally; you know that he's looking, you don't mind really. you think you'd be a little suspicious actually if ace's eyes weren't systematically rising up to look at your eyes and then moving down to linger at the curve of your chest through your tank top.

his eyes move up again after he gets his fix, stupid smile on his face, as you continue on with your story. your eyes moved over to the side, peeking over his shoulder but he doesn't make much of it when your eyes moved back to him. then, for listening to you and being such a good boyfriend, he treats himself to looking back down to stare at your chest.

his face falls when he sees that you've closed your jacket around your torso, his jaw slack open and eyes widened in horror. "babe..." he called out, a small whisper as he reached out over the table like you two were mourning over a friend's death or like you'd just told him you've done something horrible and he needed to show you support.

"what?" your eyebrows furrowed together, a hand moving towards his open palms on the table. your other arm is still pulling your jacket together.

you follow his gaze back down to your chest before the realisation hits you— the idiot was whimpering because he couldn’t get a good look at your boobs of all things. you kick him under the table, aggrieved. "there's some guy behind you that i think has been having a staring contest with my tits."

"who the hell—?" ace's eyebrows creaks, his smile twitching as his hands turned down on the table; he straightened up, slowly turning himself around. he has half the mind not to go over there and fuck up this random guy for commiting two grevious crimes against him. count one, staring at tits that should be for his eyes only; count two, forcing you to hide said beautiful chest from his view?

actually. "i'm going over there."

"ace—"

"i'm not living in a world where you have to cover up your beautiful rack 'cause of some fucking creep." he straightens up, you pull on his arm; ace looked down at you, annoyed, and then he turned to look at the guy who'd taken to looking at ace now because of his movement. "fuck you think you lookin' at? get your own fuckin' girl."

"dressed like that, she's our girl."

you let go of ace's arm, raising your hands in surrender. "have fun."

ace grinned, stepping out over the bench. "knew you'd come 'round." he leaned down to press a kiss against your cheek and his hand sneaks a squeeze of your boob, "for good luck." he claimed— then he's running off to 'protect your honor' or maybe stake his claim on your boobs.

"wear whatever you want, babe." ace tells you sometime later, after you both make a quick exit from the scene of the crime. his arm slung over your shoulder, obviously taking advantage of his height to get a bird's eye view of your 'beautiful rack', "ohhhh, that mesh lace shirt that you wear over nothing but your bra is fuckin' gorgeous." he remembered.

he rambles on and on, somehow planning outfits for you in the distant future— all of them are planned around tops that promise a view of your tits but you don't really mind. ace'll be there anyways to protect your honor.

[loucifersbitch]

tagged by @bidisasterevankinard. continuing from where it left off yesterday (also i switched the tense for the whole fic, sorry)

"Eddie," he said, a hint of pleading entering his tone, "he doesn't love me. He loves the idea of me."

"What the hell -"

"Look, it's simple." It wasn't the first time he'd given some version of this speech, and it probably wouldn't be the last. "I'm not the guy men fall in love with. I'm the guy who comes before the person they fall in love with. I'm the stepping stone to finding the love of your life."

Eddie was silent on the other end of the line.

"I love him, Eddie. I do. I can see a real future with him, and that scares the hell out of me. I knew from the start this wouldn't last, but I let myself fall in love with him anyway."

"Tommy," Eddie's voice was gentler now, "how do you know it wouldn't last?"

"Because I've done this before! More than once. And Ev- Buck deserves to find the person he's supposed to end up with sooner rather than later."

Another silence on the other end of the line. Tommy could hear Eddie breathing but that was all.

"I think," Eddie finally said, slowly, "you're reading this all wrong."

Tommy really couldn't do this.

"Can we talk about this tomorrow? I need to - I don't know, process what happened tonight or something."

He could almost see the face Eddie made as he sighed and agreed. "Sure, but I'm going to hold you to that. Tomorrow."

The line went dead.

Tommy hadn't felt this alone in months.

tagging

@sunglassesmish @powersuitup @tommycake @sherlocking-out-loud @lavenderleahy

@louisferrignojr @louscurls @loulovingho @ohithankyou @beefcakekinard

@firehose118 @sassytommykinard @evansbuck-ley @talktonytome @swiftiefirefighters

@comfortingevanbuckley @half-oz-eddie @reyesranch @mmso-notlikethat @rdng1230

@buckhastwohands @theotherbuckley @carrythatwayt @monsterrae1 @loufuckers

@bucksbignaturals @theweewooshow @xofemeraldstars

[xalygatorx]

A Case of the Slumps | Alastor x Depressed!GN!Reader

Summary: It seems you've brought your brain chemistry down to Hell with you. Figures.

Warnings/Tags: Hurt/Comfort, depression and related symptoms/thoughts (obvi), cinnamon roll Charlie, Angel gives you a Xanax but you don't take it, platonic Alastor with a hint of possible unspoken romantic feelings, unexplained cause of death, present tense for some reason, reader is gender neutral

A/N: Crosspost of a recent oneshot from my AO3 because I figured if I'm in a slump, someone else probably is too. x

Sometimes it was a thought. Sometimes it was the time of year or the weather, when Hell's crimson sky was kept dark for long periods of time by an uptick of brimstone in the atmosphere or the lingering storm clouds after an acidic downpour. Sometimes it was a memory. A song. A smell.

Sometimes it was seemingly nothing at all.

Just like when you were alive, your now-dead brain hasn't lost its particular quality of liking to work against itself. It's impossible to say whether it's a continued chemical imbalance—that'd be likely right? If demons can do drugs, then clearly there's still something to brain chemistry in Hell—or if death took a snapshot of your self and your mind as they were in life.

It doesn't really matter what it is either because it still affects you just the same. And because you haven't had a depressive episode yet post-mortem, you haven't done any of the legwork you had to do in life on your own to figure out what's "wrong" with you, who might hear you and listen, and what medication(s) works.

So when it does hit, it hits like a tidal wave no one else can see. The wave itself, anyway—everyone can see you drowning.

That first slump isn't kind enough to hit in the morning when you can sleep in—or rather stare with dead eyes at the wall, bundled under your duvet and blankets as you put off the day passing by around you. No, that first slump hits in the middle of one of Charlie's exercises, one that you were enthusiastic about participating in just an hour ago. What happened?

You know. This feeling is an old friend you'd hoped to never meet again.

Charlie doesn't though, not right away. After you excuse yourself by means of referencing a stomachache you only kind of have—and only from the emptiness pooling in your gut and humming in your chest—she catches up to you in the hallway.

"Hey!" she chirps, leaning around to look at you when you stop but don't turn around. If anything, you curl further into yourself. She doesn't notice though—the only ones who would notice your change are the ones who know to look for it. Charlie, bless her heart, doesn't have that earthly world experience yet. "Do you want us to wait up for you or…?"

"Oh, uh, no," you stammer out, yearning for a big hoodie to comfortably drown in or a cup of tea, the idea of which sounds lovely but you don't even like tea. Everything that would normally feel like a treat sounds stressful or unappetizing, leaving you uncertain about what exactly you're meant to be doing. That's when the lethargy hits hardest. "I don't feel well, so I'm just gonna rest for a while."

Charlie's brow scrunches. You can tell she's about to argue that you'll never get into Heaven if you don't stick to the exercises and something akin to a sudden flash of anger roils in your chest, kicking the dead gray weight of apathy in the teeth. Because how dare she question your commitment, your hopes, your dreams, because you're walking away this one time?

But if this is like life, if this can happen again now, how many more times will it happen? Is it over for you?

Something clicks behind her eyes though as she watches your face. You don't know this, of course, but she's seen the same look on Vaggie's face before. Primarily right after they found each other—Vaggie also fell into a pit of her own pain and trauma, a victim of her new normal until the new normal became preferable.

And, on those days, Vaggie didn't always want to be with Charlie. At some point, Charlie had to learn that it often had nothing to do with her when that happened, too. It helped her understand her father better, too, in the end. She'd needed to reach out to him, but she'd had to let Vaggie come to her when she was ready. Both were valid approaches for different people.

She decides to trust that you'll make it clear to her what you need when you're ready.

"Okay," she says and her kind voice spears your anger with guilt, killing it instantly. You were always good at that, weren't you? Pushing away the people who care. "You have my number. You have everyone's number—well, everyone with a phone anyway. Just let us know if you need something. Anything. Okay?"

You clench your teeth to hold back the burn of tears working its way up your throat. "Okay. Thanks, Charlie," you say and it comes out as sincerely as you mean it, which is good. At least something's gone right today.

"Would you like a hug?" Charlie offers, starting to hold out her arms and then hesitating when she wonders if that could feel like she was pressuring you.

You think about it and decide it's worth a try. "Sure," you say and you step into her arms. She runs even hotter than the other sinners you've met, being Hellborn. It's like cozying up just a couple inches too close to a fireplace, but it doesn't burn. She just feels like the hearth in the place that's swiftly become your home.

She doesn't let go before you're ready, but the second she feels you shift to step back, she lets her arms drop. She gives you a little wave before scampering back down the hall to resume the exercise in the lobby, leaving you to resume your trek to the elevator.

Once you're in the elevator and you've tapped the button for your floor, you fall back against the wall of the lift and run your hands down your face, sighing into your palms.

What you wouldn't give for an on-paper, calculable test that you could fill out and hand to a doctor or psychologist or someone who could tell you with complete certainty what's wrong with your brain and how to fix or endure it. Not only so you could feel better, but so you wouldn't be such a burden to your new friends, your found family. What good were you like this?

(The reality is that the group downstairs is mildly concerned, but otherwise just fine. Charlie can manage the exercise through sheer optimism alone and she has enough bandwidth to do that and be available to you as your friend whenever you need something.

A couple of the others noticed your deflated exit, perhaps because they've once been through similar episodes, and are either just hoping you feel better or trying to come up with some nice gesture to make whenever they see you next. Everything you're worried about or sure you've messed up is a product of your dopamine-deficient brain.)

You pass Angel in the hall on your way to your room as he's heading out for work and he, of course, knows that look. He just hasn't seen it on you before. He offers you a many-armed hug and what he tells you is a Xanax, telling you to text him if you need anything or just want to talk and he'll check on you whenever he's freed from the studio next.

You appreciate his offers and agree to all of it, except the unwrapped, unlabeled pill, which you get rid of once you're in your room. You trust Angel, but you're too paranoid about making whatever you're feeling worse. You barely knew how to deal with it in life, what's it going to be like in Hell?

A stretched-out old hoodie is procured from your closet and you tug it on, smoothing your hair back down as you amble toward the bed. You burrow under the blankets and try to sleep, but of course it doesn't come. You're not tired, after all. You're not even sad. There's just nothing where there's meant to be something, anything in your chest.

Hours pass and, even though you're not helping yourself by lying curled on your side and staring at the wall, you're listless. You can't talk yourself into getting up or getting something to eat. It's even hard to convince yourself to look at your phone, maybe because you've heard it buzz a few times with texts likely asking how you're doing. You don't want to answer them until it's a good answer. Until you can say you're doing better. Anything else is a disappointment, surely, for all involved.

Someone's knuckles rapping against your door makes you jolt, but you sink back into that unsteady feeling of mentally treading water instead of answering. They'll go away if they think you're sleeping. It's probably Charlie anyway, maybe checking on you ahead of dinner. Was it really almost dinnertime?

That was enough to motivate you to extract one arm from beneath the duvet, extend your hand to your phone, and tap the screen to wake it up. It was after dinner. Time was a construct and someone was still at the door, knocking more sharply now.

You bundle your arm back under the bedding, keeping your back to the door. Charlie wasn't that hard of a knocker, so maybe she'd sent Vaggie up to check on you? Husk tended to pound on doors with the side of his fist (and not come near any potentially weepy situation with a ten-foot pole), so it probably wasn't him. It might be Angel, you supposed. Short studio session, if so. Perhaps Pen, but the source of the noise was too high up to be Niffty. She'd barge on in anyway…

"My dear, I can hear you moving around in there, you know," the Radio Demon's voice informs you through the door and your heart nearly stops a second time.

Not Alastor, you sigh inwardly, covering your face in your hands again and trying not to groan lest he hear that, too.

It wasn't that you disliked Alastor. In fact, that wasn't the case at all. You'd been a bit scared of him at first, sure, when you'd initially crossed the threshold of the Hazbin Hotel and who could blame you? He was an imposing figure, someone you'd heard of within days of falling into Hell despite his seven-year sabbatical from the Pentagram.

He was also a prominent public figure from his radio show. That was how you'd first tried to get to know him a little better—you'd started tuning into his broadcasts, getting better at predicting the shrill screams of the souls he tore apart just before they blared through your speakers. You still missed them on occasion and would violently jolt upward from wherever you were sitting or lying while listening, floundering for the volume dial and usually finding it well after you needed it.

Alastor had spotted you do exactly that once during a prerecorded broadcast and, after he'd run the gambit of jokes he could make at your expense, the barrier that had existed between you two since your arrival started to come down. And while the jarring screams hadn't stopped, your radio's volume would inexplicably drop on its own ahead of them from then on. You couldn't come up with any explanation for this that didn't include Alastor's influence, but what may have been a kindness on the Radio Demon's part was directly rivaled by his then-new penchant for bursting out of the speakers in a swirl of shadow to scare you, himself, and ask you for feedback on the day's stories.

Those interruptions had become short bouts of small talk in the hall, a couple of cooperative efforts to cook the crew a delicious dinner, him holding doors for you whenever you happened to be traversing the hotel in the same direction… Little things. Lots of little things that had ended up with you considering him a friend, but who knew how he felt. He probably just thought you were amusing. What made it even worse was that you were beginning to suspect the extra pitter-patter of your heart whenever he showed up was no longer adrenaline anticipating him scaring you, but butterflies.

You poor thing. You weren't sure you could've picked a more surefire way to make a fool of yourself.

"I'm not decent," you finally say in an attempt to deter him, wincing a little at the hoarse quality of your voice. You'd only cried a little during your time in your room that day, but you'd cried hard. Partially in an effort to exorcise some of the bad feelings you were harboring, but it hadn't helped much.

"Well! Under all those blankets, I wouldn't even know, now would I!"

You squeak as you startle so much from hearing his staticky voice right behind your head that you end up in a heap on the floor between the wall and your bed.

By the time you untangle yourself from the duvet and pop your head out of the heap, he's maneuvered himself to the edge of the mattress and is peering over it while lying on his barely existent stomach. A thin, but amused smile curls his lips as his legs idly kick behind him like he's a high school girl at a sleepover.

"Was that necessary?" you ask, any amount of riling up he'd done with his sudden entrance falling away from you as your slump saps it of its vigor in one go.

Alastor's brows rise into his fringe, clearly a little caught off-guard. You can understand why—you usually either laugh or, if he gets you badly enough, clutch your chest and scold him for nearly causing your second death via a heart attack.

He tilts his head at you as his eyes narrow and you can't tell if he's confused or zeroing in on his prey. Honestly, in your current condition, you can't get yourself to care. Maybe he'll put you out of your misery for your cheek.

"Mm, I deemed it so," Alastor says, his luminous red eyes blinking down at you as he leans forward ever-so slightly. He's clearly on edge and you digest this as a display of annoyance, but he's concerned (and doesn't like that he's concerned). He's never seen you like this. "Are you ill, cher? It's quite unlike you to miss dinner."

"In a matter of speaking," you allow as you stand up, brush yourself off, and gather up your duvet into a large wad in your arms. You maneuver it back onto the bed and into a sort of nest you can return to, careful not to jostle or accidentally touch Alastor as he remains partially prone across the foot of the bed and watches you work. Mindful of how little he likely knows about mental health, given his time period, you explain in a few words, "My brain is sick."

He blinks, not sure what to make of what you've said. "Your…brain?" he repeats uncertainly. "How so?" Alastor also deems himself "sick in the head," but he's fairly certain that his brand of insanity isn't what you're referring to in yourself.

You nestle into the duvet, missing how his eyes soften a touch at how small you look right now. You take a deep breath and let it huff out as you force yourself to look at him. If he just wants to torment you a bit, this will expedite him getting it out of his system so you can go back to your staring contest with the wall. If he's not just here to make fun of you…well, then that would be surprising.

"I have depression," you finally admit and you wonder when the last time was that you said those words out loud. Even in life, it was a rare moment when you'd be met with someone who was worth explaining yourself to—most people either didn't understand because they'd never been through it themselves or because they didn't want to understand. Over time, you'd just given up trying to be honest about your struggles because being demeaned or invalidated for them just made you feel worse.

"A what now?" Alastor asks, cocking one brow as he turns to lie on his side with his head propped against one hand. His fluffy ears twitch a little but stay upright, alert, and turned in your direction.

"It's a mood, uh…ailment," you explain, thinking he might not know what a "disorder" is either. You're not familiar enough with what terms people would've used to refer to mental health in his time, so you're overcareful with the words you choose. "My brain chemistry wasn't right in life—my body didn't produce enough of the chemicals that make us feel happy, so I'd get into really bad slumps. Exhausted, sad, sometimes just numb slumps. Apparently that came down here with me, too."

"So…you're in a 'slump'?" he repeats slowly, testing the word you'd used on his tongue.

In moments like this, you find him unbearably cute—from his twitchy ears made restless by the rate of his thoughts to his wide, considering eyes as he tries to absorb what you're telling him. He's a very good listener when he's not in the middle of a bit.

"Yes," you tell him and he relaxes slightly at the confirmation. "I feel dead inside, honestly. Which is funny to say now that I'm actually dead, but it's just… I just don't feel much of anything. Or I do and it just feels empty and hollow. That's kind of worse than feeling sad."

He hums and offers, "A smile is our greatest weapon, dear. We've discussed this."

"Not against this, it's not," you sigh, just waiting now for him to get frustrated or bored with you. "I'm not trying to be difficult, Al, I swear. It's just… I can't fake what I'm feeling. I've tried! I wish I could mask half as well as you can, but it's hard. It takes energy I just don't have in times like this."

Alastor evaluates you with a glance and asks, "Then what is your weapon of choice against these…slumps?"

You tug against the seam of the duvet wrapped around you, all nervous fidgeting. "I never really figured anything out," you admit and it feels like a failure. It feels like because you can't offer him a solution to your problem, your problem must not be a problem. You remember so many exasperated faces looking back at you at times you'd admit the very same. He just looks at you though, clearly thinking. "Sometimes just waiting for it to pass was the answer. I was on medication for it at one point, but it never helped very much. I know I need to eat, but I just feel a bit nauseous when I think about food."

"Then food should be on the docket, certainly, but perhaps not just yet," he muses, sitting up as he continues to regard you. "What else?"

You throw your hands up helplessly. "I'm not sure. I'm sorry," you say. "Maybe I need to go hug Charlie again or something, that didn't fix anything earlier, but it didn't hurt."

Alastor scoffs. "Is my comfort not up to your standards, dear?" he needles you, his tone confident even as his smile wavers slightly.

You blink and shake your head even as you scramble to try and understand what he's implying. "Of course not," you quickly say. "I just… You don't have to do that kind of stuff, you know? I know it's uncomfortable for you and I'd never want to make you uncomfortable."

He chuckles and a mischievous smirk overtakes his features as he leans in and pulls you toward him via the duvet, taking an indulgent look at the blush reddening your face before he tightens the blanket cocoon around you and adds his arms to the equation after. You get the hint not to take your arms out and touch him and you're not even sure you could if you wanted to. You're frozen in place, comically close to a deer in headlights, and you can feel the heat inflaming your cheeks.

It's nice to feel something for the moment.

"Um… Alastor?" you ask, stopped from looking up at him when his pointed chin settles against the crown of your head. "You… Why?"

"Why, what?" he asks, but it's just to put off answering and you have some inkling that this might be the case despite his casual tone.

"Why are you doing this?" you ask, embarrassed by how vulnerable you sound to yourself.

"I can't have you sat here in one of your 'slumps' by yourself, darling," he mused, one of his hands absently tracing over your back.

It takes a lot for you to not lean into the touch, but you're terrified of scaring him off. You're also terrified of overthinking this though, especially as he settles in around you, his larger body usually used to intimidate and tower over others making you feel oddly safe. Then again, even in his most antagonistic moments with you, have you ever felt in danger?

"Why not?" you ask softly.

"You ask a surprising number of questions over something so simple as this," Alastor notes and his words cause a puff of warm breath to stir your hair. You shiver a little and he chuckles.

"But it's not simple for you," you murmur, letting yourself relax a bit as he impatiently tugs you closer to fit you against his chest. He's certainly not as gentle as Charlie, but you imagine he's far less practiced in this sort of thing than she is. It hits you harder because you know he's trying. And perhaps because you—silly, silly you—have a tragic little crush on the Radio Demon. "And… Well, I appreciate it. That's all."

Alastor hums and admits, "It's simpler than expected. And not unwelcome." You feel his chin shift against your crown, like he might be looking down at you, as he asks, "Is it helpful? Or is dear Charlotte's attention still preferable?"

You have to bite your lips a little to keep from smirking—that sort of tone can only indicate that he's jealous. Once again, you find him unbearably cute and it'll likely one day lead to your second untimely demise once he realizes how you feel.

"Yes, it's helpful. And preferable," you confess and you can almost feel his chest puff with pride. "This is really nice. Thank you."

"You're most welcome, dear," he says, glancing down and watching you cave to fatigue and fall asleep as he feels your weight settle further into his chest.

Alastor chuckles and gives you time to fully settle into a more restful state before he shifts your body around and situates you on your bed. He'd first considered staying, but figures having something for you to eat at the ready when you wake is a better use of his time. At least that's the reason he gives himself to go.

The truth is he can't remember the last time he honest to goodness comforted someone. There's a tickle in the back of his brain, a voice asking if he's losing his edge. Asking if you'll see him now as less than he is, which (in his mind) is a sadistic, cannibalistic overlord and nothing more.

He can't deny though that he's savoring the lingering warmth from your body on his coat. And, as much as he doesn't understand these "slumps" or the depression you referenced, he didn't like seeing you look so sad.

And he supposes if he must occasionally soften his sharp edges a bit to help keep his favorite guest present and smiling, it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world.

[tweedlydumbtweedlydoo]

You're a Dead Man (Part 2) | JJ Maybank x Routledge!reader

Summary: After JJ has a run in with his father, he begins to spiral and doubt his abilities to be a father, leaving you wondering if you're going to be a single mom.

A/N: A couple people requested part 2 and a great anon gave me this idea! Hope you like it. Link for part 1 is down below, but this could probably be read as a stand alone too!

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“What do you know about being a dad? You’re gonna fuck that kid up just like I fucked you up.”

JJ replays the conversation with is dad over and over in his head. The anxiety growing even more intense. His hand shakes as he presses it into his heart.

He didn’t know anything about being a dad. His dad was right with that one. JJ had the bad genes; Alcoholics, drug addicts. The reoccurring jail time. The dead beat dads. It all ran in his family. A never ending vicious cycle that he was going to be continuing.

You recently had your scan, finding out you and JJ would be welcoming a baby boy into the world 20 weeks from now. A mini JJ. After needing to get back to work, both you and JJ split ways and headed back to work.

He was working on a boat motor in the local shop when his boss came to him, “Maybank, you got a visitor.” He threw his thumb over his shoulder.

JJ glanced up, expecting you or one of the pogues but didn’t expect to see his dad there, taking a drag of his cigarette, a subtle sway in his posture.

JJ mentally cursed, not wanting to deal with this.

“Take it out back. I can’t have customers walking up on his bullshit today.” His boss instructs, knowing Luke enough.

JJ wipes his greasy hands on his rag and jumps down from the ladder of the boat, heading toward his dad. “What the hell do you want?” He motions over to the right with his head, walking toward the side of the shop, Luke following with a stumble.

“Jesus Christ.” JJ mutters, smelling the alcohol on his breath.

“Heard you’re gonna be a dad.” Luke says with a slur.

JJ places his hands on his hips and nods, replying with a nonchalant, “yup.”

Luke sniffs, wiping his hand against his nose, “What do you know about being a dad? You’re gonna fuck that kid up just like I fucked you up.”

JJ couldn't believe his ears, “Did you seriously come all the way down here just to say this? I got work to do.” JJ begins to walk away but Luke roughly grabs him by the arm, “I’m not done talking to you, boy! Don’t you walk away from me.”

“You know it’s true. Do the kid a favor and stay away from him. We don’t need another fucked up Maybank in the world. Look at you, working at the local boat shop. You’ll never make it at anything else. You’ll never be able to give the kid a good life. Face it," Luke takes a step toward JJ, pointing an accusing finger in his face, "you’ll end up just like me, drunk trying to make it by in life wondering where it all went to shit.”

JJ rips his arm from Luke’s tight grasp, a red mark left behind, “you have no idea of what kind of dad I’ll be. As far as I’m concerned I know exactly what kind of dad not to be.” He starts to walk away, Luke continuing to slur and insult him.

“JJ you’re going to be a shit of a father! Don't say I didn't warn you. You'll be a sorry son of a bitch bringing a kid into this world!"

~

JJ's thoughts were running rampant. His mind slowly convincing itself his dad was right. He would never be a good father. He didn't know how to be a father. You and the baby deserved better than what he could offer you.

The old rock music thumping in his ears as he opened the wooden door. It smelled like cigarette smoke. The place started to get full as everyone begins to get off work.

"What can I get you?" The barkeep asks, cleaning the bar top in front of him.

JJ has his chance to back out of this. He glances down at his watch, you'd probably just be getting off of work and heading home. You told him at the doctor's appointment you would fix his favorite tonight. It was you and JJ's turn to fix dinner for the Pogues.

He knew he needed to leave and go home but his mind pushed his legs forward, taking a seat at the bar. He knew addiction ran in his family and this was bound to happen to him. His dad was right. Might as well speed things along.

"Whisky."

~

As you came close to finishing dinner, you glanced at your phone again, nothing from JJ. He should have been home by now. You'd called and texted but no response, you began to worry.

"Hey sis," John B greeted coming through the front door, Sarah following behind.

"How did your appointment go?" Sarah asks with a smile, pushing past John B to greet you. She was just as excited as you to find out the gender. Sarah had a bet with Kie - it was gonna be a girl. She just knew it and even placed a bet on it. She immediately frowns at your worried appearance, "What's wrong?"

"JJ should be home by now and I can't get in touch with him."

"Maybe he got stuck working late? I know he said he had to finish building that motor and wanted to get it done today." John B shrugs it off, popping one of the veggie pieces in his mouth, "I wouldn't worry too much about it."

"Yeah but," you shake your head, "He usually would at least send me a text to let me know. He knew I was cooking his favorite tonight and he said he wouldn't miss it. Somethings wrong, I can feel it." You place a hand on your growing bump, a sense of uneasiness flooding over you.

"Have you tried calling him?" Sarah asks, leaning against the counter with her arms crossed, "Like John B said maybe he's busy."

"I've called and texted." You look between your brother and Sarah, "Something's wrong, John B."

He sighs with a nod. He didn't need to hear anything else from you, he can see it was truly bothering you. "I'll find him."

"Thank you." You say softly.

He nods and kisses your head, "Anything for you."

~

JJ couldn't remember which drink he was on. 8? maybe 9? He was slurring his words, swaying. He'd become the center of attention at the bar, talking with a few people, laughing it up. He could feel his phone buzz and checked it, blinking his eyes to try and focus. The thinks it says John B but he can't be for sure.

One of the guys he'd been talking to slapped him on the shoulder, pulling him from his thoughts, he slid the phone back in his pocket.

"Another drink," JJ slaps the bar top.

"You sure? I think you've had enough," The bartender states.

"Oh come on, man, give him what he wants!" One of the guys says, "The fun is just getting started."

JJ saw the little baggie and the guys crazy eyes. JJ raised his eyebrows, "I don't know man." Even in his drunken state, you flash across his mind.

The guy places a hand on JJ's shoulder, "Live a little. You deserve it." And so JJ follows the guy and a few buddies out back.

~

John B went by his work to find the shop closed and moved on to a couple places to check. It was the 4th place, Blackbeards Bar, that he finally had someone say they saw JJ, but when he went to check out behind the bar, JJ and those guys were no where to be found. John B filled with dread.

He drove the Twinkie through town, looking left and right for any sign of JJ but didn't see him. He reluctantly returned back to the chateau where you and Sarah sat around the table. He dreaded having to return without JJ and explain where he was last seen. The bar was known to be occupied by the drunks and druggies. Luke was a frequent customer.

He could tell you'd been crying. You stood when he opened the door, "Did you find him?"

John B shook his head and saw your hopes get crushed, your body physically showing the signs. Your shoulders dropped, "he has to be out there somewhere, John B. Maybe you didn't look hard enough-" You snatched your keys off the table, storming past him, but he steps in front of you, "I looked everywhere. Y/n he was last seen at Blackbeards."

"he wouldn't-" you shook your head, "It had to be a mistake."

"He was seen with Luke's crowd, y/n."

And your world came crushing down.

~

JJ didn't know how he'd done it and made it all the way to the chateau but he did. He stumbled up the front stairs. The lights, indoor and out were on. He hoped he hadn't missed dinner. You'd cooked his favorite and he was starving. He belched as he kicked his shoes off, stumbling into the nearby shelf, something came crashing down. He giggled to himself, "Oh fuck."

The door swung open, there you stood in your gown and robe. He closed one eye, squinting to focus in on you and gives you a drunk grin, "there's my baby."

He's taken aback as you lunge at him, hands hitting his chest. it sends him flying back into the porch post. You probably could have just done it with your finger and knocked him over at how drunk and high he was.

"What the fuck?!" He manages to catch himself, "What the fuck was that for?!"

"You stupid son of a bitch! Do you know how worried I've been? It's 4 o clock in the morning! I was about to call the police!"

John B and the other Pogues stood at the door, watching this scene unfold. They committed to staying up with you, hoping to keep you company and keep you calm. You were only a few minutes from having another breakdown.

"Oh shit," JJ laughs, "It's 4 am? Time flies when you're having fun then." He straightens himself up, but stays with his back pressed against the post to keep himself from swaying. It didn't stop the room from spinning.

You didn't know whether to cry or scream. You were beyond angry; heartbroken that JJ had put you through something like this. Pregnancy hormones only made it worse. It was only in the light, you could see the white powder on his nostrils.

"Is that coke?" You ask in disbelief, pointing to his nose.

He quickly wipes it away with his sleeve, "no-"

You cry out, absolutely frustrated, "JJ, what the fuck is wrong with you! This isn't you. You're out late, drinking and now doing drugs with some of your dad's buddies? We're going to have a baby in 4 months. You can't do shit like this. You can't spiral. You have responsibilities!"

JJ could feel his anger boiling, threatening to blow. His entire body going hot, his face growing red, as he points an accusing finger in your face, "You don't get to tell me what to do."

You'd seen JJ get angry before, but had never had it directed at you. You couldn't believe you were about to say this, but he looked like Luke staring back. You could feel John B's presence beside you, ready to defend his sister. He didn't like the crazy look in JJ's eyes or how he threatened you.

You straighten your back, showing JJ you weren't afraid of him. You were pissed he'd done something like this, but when you thought more about it, there had to have been something that set JJ off. He was so happy at the appointment. Nervous, but excited to find out he was having a boy. He even made the comment, "My son will never feel the way I did."

From the time you departed to back to work, something had changed and the only thing that could have set JJ off would be his dad. You knew his anger wasn't meant for you.

JJ surrenders, "Go ahead, yell at me. Tell me how horrible of a dad I'm gonna be. How I'm gonna fuck that kid up just like I'm fucked up." He holds his arms out at his side, "The kid doesn't need me. If anything he's better off without me. You're better off without me." His eyes fill with tears, "I don't deserve this. I don't deserve a happy ending." JJ is defeated and emotional.

Your heart aches at the fact JJ would ever think that way about himself. He'd already proven to be a better dad than Luke would ever be and your son wasn't even in this world yet. "Is that what Luke told you? That you're going to be a horrible dad?"

JJ wouldn't meet your eyes. You step forward, hands cupping his jawline, willing him to look at you, "JJ Maybank, you've already proven you will be an amazing dad and our baby isn't even earth side yet. Me and him both will never be better without you because you complete us, you make this family whole." Tears fill in your eyes, seeing his doing the same, "You never felt a father's love and that has been your encouragement from the beginning. You know exactly how to be a father because you have first hand of what not to do. You've stepped up and become more than a father than your own will ever be."

JJ relinquishes into you, sobs racked his body as he held onto you as if you were his lifeline.

"shhh..." You ran your fingers through his hair in a calming manner, holding him. You stayed like that for a while, holding each other before you were able to lead him into the house where he passes out on the couch.

~

JJ sulks onto the front porch, his head pounding and body feeling like he was hit by a bus. You're leaned against railing, gazing out to the water. It was a calm morning.

"Morning," His voice is husky and he smells clean as he approaches you.

You glance at him, his hair is wet and he's in clean clothes. At least he showered. He reeked last night. "Morning."

"about last night-" He scratches the back of his neck. It had come back to him in pieces but he knew enough to know what happened last night - or well this morning.

"I'm only going to say this once." You're stern as you face him, "If you ever pull the shit you did last night, you won't have anyone to come home to. I'm here for you JJ, always. And you can't spiral like that ever again." You rub a hand over your bump, "Are we in an understanding?"

He nods, "I can't even begin to apologize or have the words. I should have come home to you two." He places an uneasy hand on your belly, "I'm not him. I never will be."

"I know you aren't." You loop your arms around his middle, laying your head against his chest, "You're more than he will ever be."

~

I hope you all enjoyed this part two and I hope I did it justice for those who asked for it! I feel like I'm still a little rusty as I get back into writing here and there, so please be nice and be patient.

Likes, comments and reblogs are always greatly appreciated!

[bteezxyewriter12]

Desperation

Pairing- Wooyoung x Named Reader

Word count- 4k

Includes- Wooyoung is horny and desperate, pussy eating, cum eating, cock warming, cock riding, missionary, multiple orgasms, so much fluff

Tag List- @mingtina @jaxminnie @yeosayang @delightfulmoonbanana @tannie13 @y00nzin0 @marsstarxhwa

@yeosxxx @seokwoosmole @jjongsbebe @wisejudgedragonhairdo @meowmeowminnie @woo-stars @borntowalkaway @usagionthered @san-realblkwife @seonghwasstar @jejeyeppeo @soulseobi05 @kpop-bambi @prayerofthehaim @realisticnotes @insomniacatiny @stephy-nicole13 @mknae-jongho @bykeynote @amyz78 @blueie-things

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J POV

"Please Jo, please", Wooyoung begs, looking at me with desperation, "Please can I have your cunt wrapped around my cock?"

Ok what the fuck?

This is so not what I was expecting when I came over to hang out

"Are you on crack?", I ask, genuinely confused

He's never expressed a desire to have sex with me

Ever

He's never even expressed any attraction to me so what the fuck is this?

"No I just....I can't cum", he whines, "I haven't been able to cum in like three months"

I raise my eyebrow, not believing him at all

He has many fuck buddies he can use

Staff members willingly open their legs for him at the drop of a hat

"You're telling me you haven't fucked anyone is three months?", I scoff

"I...I did but I wasn't able to cum", he tells me, "I don't know why. I stopped fucking other girls three months ago and just jerked off instead but it didn't work either"

"You've been jerking off your whole life, what do you mean it's not working?", I ask in disbelief, "You forgot how to move your hand?"

"It's not working!", he cries, his body shaking, "Please, I'm so hard, I'm so horny all the time. I need some relief. I'm going insane"

I just raise my eyebrows at how desperate he sounds

Like he's about to lose it

"Let me see", I say, not knowing what the fuck I'm doing or why

He nods, standing up from his bed and pulling his sweatpants and boxers down

I look down at his cock and gape

I had no idea he was that big

Or that thick

And I can see what he means when he's saying he's desperate

His cock is so hard, straining, his head red and leaking so much cum, it's just crying from his slit

I don't think I've ever seen a cock that hard before

"Please help me", he whimpers

"What am I supposed to do Woo?", I ask

"Just help me"

I hesitate, "A hand job?"

He shakes his head, "I need to be in a pussy. Your pussy"

I mean it's not as if I don't want that

It's not as if I haven't dreamed of this from the moment I fell in love with him

But this...this isn't him wanting me

This is him wanting to get off because he hasn't had a fuck partner in three months

This is him being desperate to cum and I'm the only one available

"Wooyoung-", I start, not sure I should do this

A hand job is one thing, hell even a blow job is one thing but actual sex....

"Please Jo", he begs, "I'll make you cum too. I'll eat your pussy first"

I raise my eyebrow

Yeah ok that's something I've been dying to see

Him between my legs

But still, this isn't a good idea

This will just make me want him more and I can't have him

"I don't know...", I hesitate

"You don't have to fuck me", he says, distress in his voice, "You...you could just cock warm me. I just...I need to feel a pussy around me"

"So call one of your girls to come over"

He shakes his head, "No. I need your pussy"

Mine?

What the hell does that mean?

"It didn't work with anyone else. I just...I want yours. See if it helps"

Well that's not romantic at all

But at least he's being up front about what he wants

"Please Jo? Please?"

"Yeah fine", I sigh

He nods, dropping to his knees, my heart racing

His fingers hook into my sweat pants, pulling them and my panties down

He helps me take off all my bottom clothes then his gaze moves to my cunt

"Pretty", he murmurs

Without warning he pulls me to him, his tongue buried and licking in my cunt

"Oooh...fff...", I stammer, pleasure exploding in my body

I move beside me, my hand leaning against the wall to keep myself from falling over

"Fuck, you taste so good" he groans, his tongue licking along my slit, between my pussy lips

Fuck, his tongue is so wet, so long, licking in a way he makes sure I can feel all of it

He moves one of my legs over his shoulder, his tongue sinking into my hole and I clench around it hard

"Mmm", he moans, pulling his tongue out then dipping back in

"Wooyoung fuck", I moan in bliss, my hand threading through his hair, the stands so soft around my fingers

One of his hands is around me, gripping my ass and squeezing as he tongue fucks me

I'm so wet, it has to be all over his face

That thought makes me blush hard, wondering if his face will be soaked when he's done and I'll see it

His tongue pulls out, sliding up and licking along my clit, using the flat of his tongue first, then moving it so the tip is massaging it

"Fuck", I cry, blinding pleasure making my body shake, "Fuck Woo. Yes baby"

As his tongue lavishes my clit in licks, his fingers push into my hole, wiggling around, making me shiver

"So fucking wet for me", he groans erotically

Just as soon as his fingers are there, they're gone

Then they're back, then out again

I don't know what he's doing but he does this a few more times, almost like he's getting his fingers or hand wet with my juice

He whines in my cunt, his mouth wrapping around my clit sucking desperately immediately

I shiver, my legs shaking at how fucking incredible it feels

Through the bliss, I hear a rhythmic wet sound, him groaning and moaning as he sucks on me

It sounds like he's jerking off

I look down to find him desperately slurping around my clit, his eyes closed like he's in heaven

Looking further down, I get so tuned on seeing that he is indeed jerking off

His hand is wrapped around his cock, stroking himself, the veins in his beautiful arm popping as he moves

His cock is glistening and I realize that he's using my pussy cream to jerk himself off

That's why he kept putting his fingers inside my cunt

He wanted to use my cream as lube

I will admit that turns me on like nothing else, making chills run up my spine

I watch him suck on me and jerk off, the bliss getting overwhelming

The next tug of my clit has me falling into my orgasm, intense pleasure exploding in my body as I cry out his name

"Wooyoung. Oh god, Wooyoung!"

His eyes open and are on mine instantly, watching me cum as he sucks me through it, his hand letting go of his dick and squeezing my ass, pushing me as close to his face as I can be

I can't, he's so fucking hot, it's mind boggling

As the pleasure fades, his eyes hold mine as his tongue moves down to my hole and slowly licks up

Pleasure enters his brown eyes as he moans, "Oh fuck, you taste so sweet princess"

His tongue keeps licking as he eats my cum, swallowing again and again

"So fucking good. God fucking damn"

I'm shocked as he cleans my pussy, not knowing what to say

When he finishes, he stands up and my face heats up at how wet his face is

His lips, his mouth, his chin and neck are glistening in my cum

He smirks, licking his lip then wiping his mouth, my legs wobbly

He takes his bottom clothes completely off then sits on his bed, half leaning on his headboard

"Please", he whimpers

"You...you didn't cum while you were jerking off?"

He shakes his head, "I told you it doesn't work. Please princess, sit on my cock. Please"

Well here goes nothing

Climbing in him, I get in his lap, him already holding his cock up for me

I'm really doing this

It's kinda surreal

Leaning on his shoulders, I lower down onto his head, taking him in, moans immediately spilling from his mouth

I push down, feeling his unbelievably hard thick cock forcing me open so pleasurably

He's so big it's almost like he's too big for me and I have to push down hard

"Fuck!", he yells, his head leaning back against the headboard, "So tight, oh my fucking god, so tight"

I go down slowly, my pussy getting wetter and clenching harder the more inches I take

He feels so fucking good, it's insane

"Oh my god, I'm gonna...", he cries as I slide down his cock more, "I'm gonna blow my load, I'm gonna-"

His nails dig into my hips as I feel his cock throb hard, warm cum shooting in my pussy as I keep taking his dick, his body shaking under me

I'm so shocked

He really just came from me getting him in

And he's not even fully in yet

"Joanne fuck, yes baby", he shouts, lifting his hips and sliding his cock fully inside me as he orgasms, "So good. Fuck so good"

I clench around him, whimpering as his head nestles against my spot, my pussy involuntarily throbbing around him

I feel so full of his cock, so full of his cum and it's completely satisfying

Of course, leave it to him to feel the best inside me

His body stills, his eyes opening, gazing on me

He lifts his hips again, like he's making sure he's buried in my pussy as deep as he can be

And what I feel is surprising

"Are you...", I say gaping, clenching purposely around him, "Still hard?"

He nods, his eyes on me as he breathes hard

"Fuck me. Please"

That really wasn't what this was supposed to happen

I was just supposed to cock warm him

"Woo-"

"Please. Please. Don't I feel good?"

"Yes", I admit

He does, he feels really good, stretching me out so satisfyingly, his fat head nestled against my spot

"Please fuck my cock", he whines, "You can cum too. Used me to cum. I...I need it. I need your pussy. I need you"

I gaze down into his eyes, seeing want swirled with desire and it turns me on more

I mean I'm already this far, fucking can't be much of a stretch

Maybe I need this

Maybe I just need to fuck him once and I can get over these feelings for him

Probably not, but I'm already sitting on his cock, I might as well go all the way

I nod and he smiles his beautiful smile that takes my breath away and it's so not fair

His hands move up from my hips, pushing my shirt up my body as he sits up

I move my arms through the sleeves, letting him take it off, followed by my bra then I get his shirt off

I gently push him back and get my first close up look of my best friend shirtless

And I choke on air

Broad muscular chest, abs cut into his stomach, the tattoo on his ribs so fucking sexy

I slide my hands slowly down his body, starting from his shoulders, to his chest then to his abs, just feeling how soft and warm his skin is

I move my fingers to his tattoo, slowly tracing the words, his skin shivering under my touch, making me smile softly

"Fuck", he murmurs and when I look up at him, he's biting his lip, looking at me like how I must be looking at him

Like I'm everything he's ever wanted

But that can't be right

He's probably just shocked at seeing me naked is all

It's then I noticed his hands moving all over my body, touching my hips, his fingers trailing up my body, running over my sides, making my skin tingle

He cups my boobs, softly squeezing, his thumbs running over my nipples making me wetter on his dick

"You're fucking beautiful", he murmurs, shocking the fuck out of me, "Fucking perfect"

I blush but remind myself that it's just because he's never seen me naked before

And the fact that he wouldn't tell me I'm ugly

Wooyoung can be dense but he's not mean

"You're beautiful Woo", I tell him, his eyes meeting mine, his cheeks turning pink

"Ride me?", he asks shyly

Which is completely the opposite of the way he acts around me

He's always loud, at times obnoxious, funny, confident

Never shy

It's something completely new

I just nod, putting my hands flat on his chest, then moving my legs, sliding up his cock

The drag of his dick feels so good, sending shivers up my spine, my pussy desperately clenching on him to keep him in

"Fuck", he whimpers, his eyes glued to my pussy

When I get to his head, I squeeze hard, then push down, the feeling of his cock opening me up so delicious

"Woo", I moan, bottoming him out, his head rubbing my spot, making my body shudder

I move slowly at first, up and down his length, moving just a bit faster with each bounce

"Yes baby. Feels so good", he groans, his hands gripping my hips hard

I get a good pace going, bouncing on his extremely hard dick, enjoying the way he feels moving in my pussy

I slide my hands down to his abs, leaning on them as I slip up and down, moving my hips in a circle as I take him all in, grinding on his head

Each rub of his head against my spot zaps bliss and lightening up my spine and I can't help but softly moan his name often

"Wooyoung"

I increase my speed, leaning back on his legs, throwing my head back the more the bliss gets

"Fuck, I didn't know you knew how to ride cock", he murmurs, watching me move on him

I nod, "Yeah, I do"

Most guys are terrible at getting me to cum so I always ride them after a few other positions to make sure I cum too

I've gotten very good at it

"This pussy is so pretty, swallowing my cock like this", he whimpers, "So fucking wet, creaming my cock so fucking much. I didn't know a pussy could cream like this"

"Do you like it?", I ask, closing my eyes, falling into the pleasure he's giving me, my pussy spasming around him harder

"Love it", he answers, "Are you always this wet?"

I shake my head, "Not this much"

I do get wet but I'm completely drenched now, so much so that the squelching sound my pussy is making as I fuck his cock is so fucking loud

It's never been this loud before

"It's just for me?"

I nod, "Yeah Woo. You make me this wet. You make me this turned on"

"Fuck", he murmurs, my cunt choking the life from his cock

I'm so close, just a few more bounces

"Woo, I'm gonna cum", I mumble, moving my legs as fast as I can, riding him like I've never ridden anyone before

"Please cum", he begs quietly, "Wanna feel you cum so bad"

His begging with the next bounce does it and I explode all over his cock, shouting his name, the ecstasy washing over me

"Wooyoung", I moan, not knowing which way is up

All I can do is ride the pleasure, my hips rocking on his cock, his head massaging my spot and keeping me in bliss longer

"Yes, oh fuck, you feel so good! Princess I can't...it feels...fuck", he chokes out, pushing his hips up, making sure he's buried deep inside me

My whole body shakes and I have to lean forward, my hands on his abs as I ride it out on his amazing cock

As the pleasure slowly leaves, I slow down my rocking until I'm finished, so out of breath

That was a fucking amazing orgasm

Before I can say anything, he sits up, pulls me against him and rolls us over

He moves on top of me, my legs moving around his waist on their own, his soft, warm, sweaty skin against mine

It feels so fucking good

He looks down at me with an unreadable expression as he gazes into my eyes

I can't tear my gaze from his intense one, wondering what he's thinking

His finger runs along my cheek as he leans down, his lips capturing mine in a mind altering kiss

My entire body floods with fire, every atom alight and awake

I feel dizzy, my head spinning as I kiss him back, never wanting it to end

My arms move around his neck, holding him close as he pushes his cock back inside me

Burying inside in one stroke, he grinds against me as his tongue moves in my mouth, deepening the kiss

I'm in total heaven, never wanting this to end

He kisses me silly, his hips pulling back, the drag of his cock sending tingles up my spine

He snaps his hips forward, his cock sliding back in, the tip rubbing my spot

I moan in his mouth, clenching on his dick tightly

As he moves, he makes sure he goes in deep, his pelvis rubbing my clit, sending stars into my vision

His arm leans next to my head, his other hand softly playing with my boobs as he thrusts faster

His lips separate from mine but I shake my head, my hand moving to his cheek, "No Woo, kiss me. Don't stop"

He smiles softly, his smile so fucking dazzling, then his lips are back on mine, kissing me passionately

I begin moving my hips, meeting his thrusts, my arms wrapping around him, my hands on his strong back

His muscles move under my palms, his skin soft and sweaty

It does nothing but turn me on more

We move together, my legs tightening around his waist as the pleasure becomes more and more

We both moan, clinging onto each other and I never want this to stop

I want to keep his warm sweaty skin against mine, want to keep running my fingers in his soft hair, keep his lips against mine

That would be my dream come true

"Princess", he murmurs between kisses, his hand taking one of my hands, lacing our fingers and holding my hand firmly, "Princess, fuck, so good"

"So good Woo", I agree, kissing him, the feeling of his hand in mine so right

His cock plunges in and out, the feel driving me crazy, the bliss almost too much

I'm close, my pussy gripping and choking his length

"You're gonna make me cum princess", he groans breaking the kiss, his face moving into my neck, his hips rolling into mine, plunging his cock in at a dizzying speed, "Oh fuck, you're gonna make me cum"

"Wooyoung", I cry, ecstasy crashing over me as another mind blowing orgasm over takes me

I can't think, I can't tell which way is up, all I know is I'm in incredible pleasure, screaming his name

His hips fuck harder into me as I cum, yelling, "I'm coming. Fuck, princess, I'm coming, fuck!"

His cock barrels in, throbbing hard as his warm cum fills me for a second time, his hips pressing against mine, keeping his length inside me

My pussy can't help but pulse around him, milking his cock for all his cum

"Yes, Wooyoung, fuck", I moan as he moans, "Joanne, princess, so good baby, fuck, fuck, fuck"

I finish first, coming back down to earth, holding him as he finishes, running my fingers in his hair and kissing his shoulder

He shivers against me, lifting his head, his gorgeous brown eyes on mine through his wet sweaty hair

He smiles, then leans down, kissing me so softly and in this moment I'm utterly happy

He moves off me, laying down next to me, cuddling into me, his face nuzzling in my neck and I'm surprised

I thought he'd just get up and want to hang like nothing happened

"Mmm princess", he murmurs, his arms wrapping around me, holding me firmly against him and I just can't help but turn into his embrace, snuggling into him too

If he wants to cuddle, I'm going to take it

He sighs contently against my neck, his fingers running in my hair and it feels so good

"Baby", he sighs, "I love you"

I stop breathing, wondering if he knows what he's saying

Wondering if he's joking

Wondering if he knows he just upended my world

"Princess?", he says, a nervous tick to his voice

"Woo...what...what are you doing?", I ask

"I don't understand-", he starts

"Are you playing a joke on me?", I ask quietly, hoping he's not because that would be unforgivable, "Are you just saying-"

"No!", he exclaims, lifting his head, his eyes on mine, "I'm not playing a joke! I would never do that"

"So...you...mean you actually....", I trial off, almost afraid to believe it

"Love you?", he asks, his fingers trailing down my cheek softly, "Yeah Jo, I'm stupidly in love with you"

My heart skips a beat, it taking a few seconds for it to sink in

"Yeah...why do you think I was begging it to be you?", he asks softly, "If I wanted to fuck, I could of gone to the club and picked any girl. I could of called any fuck buddy like you suggested"

I mean yes, he could have

"I just...I couldn't be with anyone else. Anytime I tried, I just wanted you, kept thinking about you and my dick...wouldn't work with anyone else. I couldn't get hard with anyone else. And if I did...I didn't stay hard long enough for sex"

My eyes widen at that

He's never had a problem fucking anyone else before

"I'd just....lost interest because it wasn't you"

"You're kidding", I gape

He shakes his head, "No princess. Once I realized I love you, no other girl did it for me or held my interest. And yeah while I was desperate tonight, I wanted just you. I knew it would only work with you. It had to be you"

Me

I'd have never thought it would be me

Or it'd be more than sex

"I just...I didn't know how to tell you", he says shyly, breaking eye contact and looking down, "And right now, having you in my arms, finally cuddling with me, it felt right and I just said it"

I lift his face to mine, stroking his cheek softly, looking into his eyes

"I love you Wooyoung", I tell him, his eyes widening as a smile forms on his face, "I have been in love with you for so long you don't even know. I thought you'd never see me"

He shakes his head, "I did see you princess. I just didn't know how to tell you how I felt until tonight"

I smile, "I'm glad you did baby. All I ever wanted was you"

"You have me princess", he assures me

"You have me baby", I tell him, "I love you"

"I love you baby", he whispers, his lips against mine in a sweet loving kiss and I melt into him

After, we settled back in each other's arms under his blanket, my fingers running in his hair

"Mmmm princess", he coos, against my neck, "Tomorrow I have a photo shoot. You're coming with me right? I know you don't have work tomorrow"

I giggle, "Yeah baby, I'll come with you"

"Mm hmm. And you'll come to more performances? I need my girlfriend watching me on stage and waiting backstage for me to shower me in kisses and tell me how good I did"

I laugh, kissing his soft lips, "Of course my high maintenance baby"

"And I need to be with you every night, to see you and fuck you and cuddle you and tell you I love you and sleep with you in my arms", he continues, "It's non-negotiable"

I smile, so fucking happy, "That can definitely be arranged baby"

"Good", he says, snuggling closer, "We can start tonight. You're staying with me"

"Yes sir", I laugh, holding him tighter

"I love you princess", he whispers, kissing my neck

"I love you baby", I answer

I close my eyes, ready to fall asleep in my best friend and boyfriend's arms

[urmymiller]

Baby’s Been Waitin’

warning/tags: MDNI. 2003!joel x reader. reader has no physical description but is said to have a job. age gap (i imagine reader to be 10/11 years younger than joel). established relationship. soft dom!joel (?). implied smut (?). reader being a bit of a brat (that's code for horny but let's be real, who wouldn't be for joel?). lmk if there are any errors. enjoy! 🩵 wc: 1k

a/n: i wrote this only cause i miss pre outbreak!joel and have been having dreams about him.

On your end, it’s a boring Saturday night because you didn’t work today. Although on your boyfriend's end, it's the opposite because he sadly did. He had called you earlier in the day, saying something along the lines of, “Sorry baby, work’s gonna go on a little longer,” and mentioned something about them not having the materials they needed.

You felt that you barely saw Joel that morning. He woke before the sun rose and took a shower. He was quiet, since he knew you didn't work today so he wanted you to sleep in as long as you could. After he got dressed and grabbed his stuff, he went to your side of the bed and gave you a kiss on the cheek.

"Hey I'm leaving Baby, I'll see you later okay? I love you."

You lifted your hand up to his that was cradling your face, and hummed. "Okay, have a good day, I love you." You said sleepily.

"I will. Bye babygirl." He smiled as he stood up to close the door to the bedroom and leave for work.

****

Later that day, as you’re lying on the couch watching a movie, patiently waiting for Joel to come home, is when you hear the front door open and see that it’s him. He walks over and collapses onto the couch, next to you, and begins to take his shoes off. “There you are. Hey,” you say with a smile. You can tell he looks tired, but you give him a kiss on the cheek anyway.

He rests his head on your shoulder, looking up at you and smiles softly while he puts his hand on your thigh and rubs it, as if to say, “Sorry for being late and not giving you a kiss, I’m just exhausted.” You understand. You sit upright and ask him how his day went. He chuckles, putting both hands in his face and rubbing it, “You don’t wanna know how my day went, I promise you,” he says. But again, you ask him, in a seductive voice (hoping he won't notice), to tell you, saying, “C’mon, baby… I wanna know how your day went so I can make you feel better.” He looks you up and down, as if he’s suspicious of you, but ignores it and says, “Okay, only because you asked.” You smile. 

As he begins to speak, he doesn’t even realize you’ve started massaging his shoulders, and he leans back into you. Still going on about his day, he says, “Yeah, right there. Oh my god, baby…”

Even though he can’t see you, you smile and ask, “That feels good, huh?”

“Hell yeah. Holy shit. Where did you learn to do that?”

 You shrug and say sarcastically, “Can’t tell you. It’s top secret. You’ll never find out.” 

He rolls his eyes and laughs, “Yeah, whatever. Just keep doin’ what you’re doin’ because let me tell you… it feels amazing. Don't ever stop. ”

You laugh. And after a pause, you think to yourself and smile.

“Why’d you stop?” he asks.

“No reason…” you say with a playful smirk.

“Baby, what are you up to?” He turns his head slightly. 

“Nothing!” You laugh as he’s getting suspicious of you.

“I don’t know what you’re up to, but it’s somethin’, so tell me.”

“It’s nothing, I promise.” You say as you try your best to hide your smirk. He holds your gaze and squints, as if he’s trying to figure out if you’re lying to him or not. 

After a pause, you can’t help but spit it out, “It’s just… you wanna be bossy and tell me what to do so…” You roll your eyes sarcastically. 

He pauses, then quickly turns around and grabs your wrist as you’re about to put your hands over his shoulders onto his chest. “Did you just... call me ‘bossy’?”

“Yeah, what about it? It’s the truth.” You smirk.

“I should be the one calling you bossy, not the other way around. Besides, I know what you’re doing,” he says, trying not to smile.

You shrug and say sarcastically, “You do? Because from where I’m sitting, I’m just massaging my boyfriend because he works so hard, and since I was here all day, I’d like to make him feel better when he comes home. But he didn’t say the magic word, so I stopped.” You pout.

He rolls his eyes and scoffs once more, “You’re doing it on purpose at this point.”

Still acting like you know nothing, you say, “Doing what? And on purpose? Baby, I seriously don’t know what you’re talking about. I just wanted to massage you, but like I said… you’re being bossy. What’s a girl to do?”

He slightly smirks and tilts his head to one side. “Call me bossy one more time and watch what happens.”

You smirk as well and pause. “Bo—”

He flips you over face-down so fast that you gasp and laugh. He gets on top of your back to straddle you and leans down to whisper in your ear. “Listen closely, okay?” You smile as you nod.

“We’re gonna go upstairs to our bedroom and I’m gonna give you what you want because I know that you want it, even though you could've just asked. But also because I’m so sorry for leaving you all alone and bored. Then, you’re gonna give me what I want, okay, brat?” He emphasizes the word "brat," knowing you planned this from the very beginning. Although he knows what you’ve been doing, he can’t deny that he loves giving you some of the best nights of your life—the kind that leave you sore the next day. 

“Okay,” you say, smirking as you turn your head to look him in the eyes.

“Okay, what?” he says.

“Okay, Baby.”

“That’s my girl. C’mon.” He lifts you up and tosses you over his shoulder.

"Oh my-- Joel!" You gasp, and the both of you laugh as he carries you up the stairs.

"This is what you wanted, right?" He says with a huge grin on his face.

“You’re gonna say the magic word for me to give you what you want, right?”

He rolls his eyes and lies you down on the bed. “We’ll see how you feel about me saying that ‘magic word’ after this.”

[six-eyed-samurai]

Not canon to my storyline because Geto's younger brother can use Cursed Technique/see Cursed Spirits, and Geto murdered his parents for an entirely different reason, but alternatively Geto Jnr. could've ended up with Gojo instead...

In a way Geto was... relieved that one member of his family wasn't home that day and didn't join the two bodies lying on the ground.

He must still be at school, Geto assumed as he wiped off his hands. Did he really want to kill him though? He couldn't let him live either, not when he wasn't a Jujutsu sorcerer...but he'll shelve that issue for now, seeing as he wasn't at home today and technically Geto didn't know where he was. Out of sight, out of mind, right?

A closet upstairs shuddered, creaking open; Suguru-nii hadn't known he'd been sick and stayed home today.

***

"You want me to what?!"

Gojo didn't think he could receive any more shock these days, still reeling from his best friend's betrayal and mass murder, but somehow Yaga still managed to prove him wrong. He blinked a few more times, adjusted his sunglasses and even let Yaga shove his feet off the table.

He'd always bugged Geto to let him meet his so precious little brother one day, begging and bargaining. Maybe he'd tag along while Geto picked him up from school, or go to the park together, or heck, empty his pockets at the toy store!

Not-

"I don't understand. You're telling me Geto spared his brother and now you want me to do something about him?"

"We found him hiding in his closet, scared out of his mind." Yaga inhaled sharply. "Not surprising - he must've heard everything that happened. And it doesn't look like Geto spared him...more like he wasn't aware that he was home as well."

Nah. Gojo knew his friend - even if it seemed like he didn't after all.

He'd know, he'd know exactly where his brother was whether by instinct or not. He'd just chosen to overlook it on purpose.

"I know you're looking after Fushiguro's kids, aren't you? I know it's a lot to ask but I hope you can, I don't know, help him. He hasn't spoken a thing since we brought him here."

Gojo attempted to make a sarcastic quip, something around the lines of "man, I really must be the greatest Child Whisperer of all time".

He cleared his throat instead.

"He really wants a pet dog or cat, but he's allergic to fur, so you think he'd like pet fish?"

"I'm getting him that plushy we saw in a claw machine - he's kinda sad we didn't win it but he doesn't have to know I bought it from a store, heh."

"Sorry, can you take over this? My brother's participating in a competition and I don't wanna be late."

Damn, truly, how much had Geto changed? No wonder the kid was traumatized. To have his idolised, beloved big bro suddenly decide to go serial killer and his world flipped upside down, not understanding Jujutsu society. He wasn't a sorcerer either...he would have no one.

(Well, one, but Hell if Gojo was giving the kid up to-)

"Hey, it'll be good for Megumi to make friends, so why not?" Gojo stood and stretched. "Let's go meet the little squirt."

***

"Hi, kiddo...woah, you're so..."

Tiny. Small. Fragile. Gojo surmised that Geto had monopolized his family's genes of tallness all for him, or maybe it was because he had appeared to shrunk in on himself from all that crying and terror. He was still wiping at his streaming face after all. And - oh, it's that plush rabbit Geto made him buy when they passed by that store.

"You doing okay?" Gojo is hunkering down to his height, which was really giving his legs cramps, but he got a slight shake of the head in response. "It's alright. I don't all of us are, heh."

"Do you want anything? Uh, hungry, thirsty, I dunno, naps? Sorry, I'm not sure how little kids work and Megumi sucks at being a normal one. Do you want kikufuku?" Gojo reluctantly holds out his bag. "No? More for me - I mean, can I get you anything then?"

"...water s'okay."

"Gotcha."

The silence is awkward. Maybe he should've brought Toji's kids - Tsumiki was good at these sort of these things and Megumi...uh, Megumi was Megumi. "Nice rabbit. Y'know I bought it for you?"

"Suguru-nii told me."

"He did?" Gojo was momentarily taken aback. He thought Geto had wanted to keep his brother and the Jujutsu world completely separate, and, well, this meant- "Well, I do have good taste."

"The ribbon was ugly so we got a new one."

"Jeez, first meeting and you're already bullying me, huh? So mean, you and your brother - shitshitshit, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to - shit, don't cry, Yaga will kill me - oof?!"

The kid cried a literal puddle into Gojo's uniform. He used of the hands now around him to pat his back uncertainly. "Will Suguru-nii come back?"

"...he will." Gojo tightened his hold around the smaller figure; he was glad for his sunglasses to hide the-

"Just not the same as before."

"Why?"

"...you'll find out one day."

"Then I'm alone? Will the - them send me away?"

"Not while I'm here, kiddo. Don't worry."

***

"Faster, Megumi! Faster!"

"Shut up, you're heavy," The spiky haired boy grumbled, but hefted him a little more securely and picked up pace. The younger one on his back still nearly fell off giggling though. "You're squirming again."

A bright flash invaded their faces and left them blinking. "Ah, the kids all playing so happily, it makes me feel like a proud dad!"

"Stop taking photos."

"Nah, still taking."

"Gojo, tell him to stop pulling at my face - mmph!"

"Megumi's not smiling for the camera!"

"Aw, they're actually kinda cute." Shoko shakes her head, amused by Megumi being used as an overworked horse, taking her cigarette out of her mouth. "Hey, Gojo, if you ever don't want them one day I'm happy to adopt."

"You're just jealous I'm amazing and have amazing kids and you're not amazing and that will never happen."

Shoko stabs a finger at him. "Don't pretend you're not a terrible influence on them."

"Says the one smoking in front of them!"

"I didn't even light it yet."

"Whatever!" Gojo snapped another photo - it's definitely going onto the fridge, with Megumi's face in such an unflattering angle. The fridge is overcrowded with dozens of similar photos, but Gojo's sure he can make room for one more. Photos were the only thing permanent and certain, after all.

Who knew Geto would show up and try to take back-

"Gojo, Shoko, Gumi dropped me into the puddle!"

"I did not!"

***

"By the way, I heard you're taking care of another kid now, Gojo."

Instantly his guard was up. He should've known Geto would've turned around at the last second, amidst the crowds and sea of heads, to ask, to know - but it'd been so long and quiet. "I don't know why that interests you."

"So it's true." Geto turns around fully. "Can I have my brother back then? I missed him terribly ever since you all kidnapped him from me. I'm sure he's-"

"He's completely fine, but he won't be if I'm giving him back to you." Gojo shoved his way forward, closer. "You missed him? Sure didn't seem that way. I'm not going to let you kill him."

Geto actually has the audacity to look stunned. "Kill him? Why would I kill my brother?"

"Then why'd you kill your parents?"

"You won't understand. I want him back, and if you won't give him to me-"

"You'll try and get him yourself? What makes you think he'll want to go back to you?"

Geto tilts his head. "I'm his brother."

"Did you know he was in the house that day then?" No, Geto's surprised eyes said. Gojo clenched his fist. "He's not a Jujutsu sorcerer. God knows what you plan to do."

"I'll make him one."

Gojo nearly laughed. "What?"

"I'll make him into one. I promise you, Gojo, I don't care if all the demons of Hell stood in the way." Geto snapped his fingers. "I want him back, make no mistake."

"It won't be Hell's demons in your way, it'll be me. He doesn't want to see you!"

"But he needs me. And that's that."

I'm keeping him under lock and key now, Gojo swore to himself as he watched Geto disappear before hurrying away as well. Lock. And. Key.

[akai-nezumi]

The only thing that bothered me about this issue and the most recent representations of Jason.

I'm really tired of Jason being seen as stupid.

And I think this has had a lot to do with Fanon as well. If you ask someone who is the Robin who hates school and studying and other bad examples. They'll tell you "it's definitely Jason, he hates all that because he's the bad, tough guy and for that reason he's also the dumbest of the Robins."

[breakbeatbun]

[anipgarden]

Things to Do that Aren't Related to Growing Plants

This is my second post in a series I’ll be making on how to increase biodiversity on a budget! I’m not an expert--just an enthusiast--but I hope something you find here helps! 

Some of us just don’t have much luck when it comes to growing plants. Some of us simply want to aim for other ways to help that don’t involve putting on gardening gloves. Maybe you've already got a garden, but you want to do more. No problem! There’s a couple of options you can look into that’ll help attract wildlife in your area without even having to bring out any shovels!

Provide a Water Source

Oftentimes when I see ‘add a water source’ in informational articles about improving your backyard for wildlife, it’s almost always followed by an image of a gorgeous backyard pond with a waterfall and rock lining that looks expensive to set up, difficult to maintain, and overall just… not feasible for me. Arguably, not feasible for a lot of people. And that’s okay! There’s still ways to add water in your garden for all kinds of creatures to enjoy!

There’s tons of ways to create watering stations for insects like bees and butterflies. A self refilling dog bowl can work wonders! Add some stones into the receiving tray for insects to land on or use to climb out, and you’ve got a wonderful drinking spot for all kinds of insects! You can also fill a saucer or other dish with small stones and fill it, though it’ll likely need refilling daily or even several times a day during hot times. 

I've seen people online use all kinds of things to make water features. Some go with terra-cotta pots, pebbles, and a cheap pump to get a small and simple fountain. Others use old tires, clay, and a hole in the ground to create an in-ground mini pond system. If all else fails, even a bucket or watertight box with a few plants in it can do the trick--though do be wary of mosquitoes if the water isn’t moving. In situations like these, a solar-powered fountain pump or bubbler are great for keeping the water moving while still making it a drinking option for wildlife (it not even more appealing for some)--and these items can be obtained fairly cheap online!

Bird baths are an option as well--a classic way to provide for birds in your area, they can be easy to find online or in a gardening store! The only downside is that a good, quality bird bath can be pricey up-front. However, a nice stone bird bath should last a long time, be easy to clean and refill, and be enjoyed by many birds! I’ve also seen tutorials on how to make your own with quickcrete! Bird baths will be a welcome sight to birds, as they provide a space for them to drink and bathe to regulate the oils in their feathers for flight and insulation. Putting a stone in the middle will also help insects to escape if they fall in, and provide a place to perch so they can get their own drink. You’ll want to change the water and clean the baths regularly--as often as once a week, if you can manage it.

If possible, it’s highly encouraged to fill and refill water features with rainwater instead of tap water. Tap water is often treated, so instead of using hoses or indoor kitchen water, collecting some rainwater is a great alternative. Collecting rainwater can be as simple as leaving cups, bins, or pots outside for awhile.

Butterflies and other creatures will also drink from mud puddles. If you can maintain an area of damp soil mixed with a small amount of salt or wood ash, this can be fantastic for them! Some plants also excel at storing water within their leaves and flowers (bromeliads come to mind), making them an excellent habitat for amphibians as well as a drinking spot for insects and birds.

Bird Feeders and Bird Houses

Some of the fancy, decorated bird feeders are expensive, but others can be pretty low-cost--I got my bird feeder from Lowe’s for around 10 dollars, and a big bag of birdseed was around another 10 dollars and has lasted several refills! If you don’t mind occasionally buying more birdseed, a single birdfeeder can do a lot to attract and support local birds! If you’re handy, have some spare wood, and have or can borrow some tools, you may even be able to find instructions online to make your own feeder. You may not even need wood to do so! Even hummingbird feeders, I’ve found, are quick to attract them, as long as you keep them stocked up on fresh sugar water in the spring and summer!

An important note with bird feeders is that you have to make sure you can clean them regularly. Otherwise, they may become a vector for disease, and we want to avoid causing harm whenever possible. Also keep an ear out and track if there’s known outbreaks of bird diseases in your area. If local birding societies and scientists are advising you take your birdfeeders down for awhile, by all means, do it!

Bird houses are naturally paired with bird feeders as biodiversity promoters for backyard spaces, and it makes sense. Having bird houses suited to birds in your area promotes them to breed, raise their young, disperse seeds, and generally engage in your surrounding environment. Setting them up takes careful selection or construction, preparation, and some patience, but sooner or later you might get some little homemakers! Keep in mind, you will need to clean your birdhouses at least once a year (if not once per brood) to make sure they’re ready and safe for birds year after year--you wouldn’t want to promote disease and parasites, after all. But they could be a valuable option for your landscape, whether you purchase one or construct your own! 

Again, do make sure you're putting up the right kind of boxes for the right kinds of birds. Bluebird boxes are some I see sold most commonly, but in my area I believe they're not even all that common--a nesting box for cardinals or chickadees would be far more likely to see success here! And some birds don't even nest in boxes--robins and some other birds are more likely to use a nesting shelf, instead! Research what birds live in your area, take note of any you see around already, and pick a few target species to make homes for!

Solitary Bee Houses

A bee house or bee hotel is a fantastic way to support the solitary bees in your area! For a few dollars and some annual cleaning, you can buy a solitary bee house from most big box nurseries. Alternatively, you can make one at home, with an array of materials you may already have lying around! You can even make them so that they’ll benefit all kinds of insects, and not necessarily just bees.

Though you don’t even necessarily have to break out the hammer and nails, buy a ton of bricks, or borrow a staple gun. Making homes for tunneling bees can be as simple as drilling holes in a log and erecting it, or drilling holes in stumps and dead trees on your property. You might even attract some woodpeckers by doing this!

Providing Nesting Area

There are tons of different kinds of bees, and they all make different kinds of homes for themselves. Not all of them make big cavity hives like honey bees, or will utilize a solitary bee house. Bumblebees live in social hives underground, particularly in abandoned holes made by rodents--some others nest in abandoned bird nests, or cavities like hollow logs, spaces between rocks, compost piles, or unoccupied birdhouses. Borer, Ground, and Miner bees dig into bare, dry soil to create their nests. Sparsely-vegetated patches of soil in well-drained areas are great places to find them making their nests, so providing a similar habitat somewhere in the garden can encourage them to come! I do talk later in this document about mulching bare soil in a garden--however, leaving soil in sunny areas and south-facing slopes bare provides optimal ground nesting habitat. Some species prefer to nest at the base of plants, or loose sandy soil, or smooth-packed and flat bare ground. They’ve also been known to take advantage of soil piles, knocked over tree roots, wheel ruts in farm roads, baseball diamonds and golf course sand traps. You can create nesting ground by digging ditches or creating nesting mounds in well-drained, open, sunny areas with sandy or silty soil. However, artificially constructed ground nests may only have limited success. 

Providing Alternative Pollinator Foods

Nectar and pollen aren’t the only foods sought out by some pollinators! Some species of butterflies are known to flock to overripe fruit or honey water, so setting these out can be an excellent way to provide food to wildlife. You may want to be cautious about how you set these out, otherwise it can help other wildlife, like ants or raccoons. Butterflies may also drop by to visit a sponge in a dish of lightly salted water. 

Bat Houses and Boxes

Big or small, whether they support five bats or five hundred, making bat boxes and supporting local bats is a great way to boost biodiversity! Not only will they eat mosquitoes and other pest species, but you may also be able to use the guano (bat droppings) as fertilizer! Do be careful if you choose to do that though--I’ve never had the opportunity to, so do some research into how strong it is and use it accordingly.

Provide Passageway Points

If you want your area to be more accessible for creatures that can’t fly or climb fences, allowing or creating access points can be an excellent way to give them a way in and out. Holes in the bottom of walls or fences can be sheltered with plants to allow animals through. 

In a somewhat similar manner, if you’re adding a water fixture, it’s important to provide animals a way to get into and out of the pond--no way in, and they can’t use the water. No way out, and they may drown. Creating a naturalistic ramp out of wood beams or sticks, or stepped platforms out of bricks, stones, or logs can do the trick. 

Get or Keep Logs and Brush Piles

I’ve already mentioned logs a good handful of times so far in this post. To be used as access ramps, or as nesting areas for solitary bees. But they have value as much more than that! Logs on the ground provide shelter for all kinds of animals, especially depending on size--anything from mice, reptiles, and amphibians to things like turkey vultures and bears will use fallen logs as shelter. Inside of a decaying log, there’s a lot of humidity, so amphibians are big fans of them--meanwhile, the upper sides of them can be used as sunning platforms by things like lizards. Other animals can also use the insides of logs as nest sites and hiding places from predators too big to fit inside. Fungi, spiders, beetles, termites, ants, grubs, worms, snails, slugs, and likely much more can be found inside rotting logs, using the rotting wood as food sources or nesting places. They can then provide food for mammals, amphibians, reptiles, and birds. They can also be regarded as a landmark or territory marker as wildlife get more familiar with your space.

So how do you get logs for cheap? Try Chip Drop! I talk about them more in a future post, but you can mark saying that you’d like logs in your drop, so they’ll give you any they have! In fact, you may even get a drop faster if you're willing to accept some logs. You may also be able to approach arborists you see working in your area and ask for logs. There may also be local online listings for people selling logs for cheap, or just trying to get rid of them. If there’s land development going on near you, you may be able to snag logs from trees they cut down to make space. Do keep in mind, you don’t need to have huge gigantic logs laying around your property to make an impact--even small logs can help a lot.

If possible, creating and leaving brush piles on the edge of your property can be a great boost to biodiversity--even if you may not see the wildlife using it. They’ll provide shelter from weather and predators, and lower portions are cool and shady for creatures to avoid the hot sun. The upper layers can be used as perch sites and nest sites for song birds, while lower layers are resting sites for amphibians and reptiles, and escape sites for many mammals. As the material decays, they also attract insects, and as such they’ll attract insect-eating animals too. As more small animals find refuse in your brush pile, their predators will be attracted to them as well. Owls, hawks, foxes, and coyotes are known to visit brush piles to hunt. Making a brush pile can be as simple as piling branches and leaves into a mound, as big or as small as you want. You can even use tree stumps or old fence posts near the base, and keep stacking on plant trimmings and fallen branches. Do note that you don’t want to do this near anything like a fire pit.

Don't forget, with all of these, your mileage may vary for any variation of reasons, so don't worry if you can't take all of even any of these actions! Even just talking about them with other people may inspire someone else to put out a bat box, or leave a few logs out for wildlife!

That's the end of this post! My next post is gonna be about ways to get seeds and plants as cheaply as possible. For now, I hope this advice helps! Feel free to reply with any questions, success stories, or anything you think I may have forgotten to add in!

[stupidwittlebaby]

Do any of you systems ever dissociate, but in a good way?

Not a groggy, hazy, or numb sort of dissociation, but a comfortably disconnected one. Sensations, smells, tastes - they're all still there, I can feel them, but they're soft and dream-like. It's more like walking through an open world video game. No quests, no fighting, just walking and observing, admiring the little details the devs lovingly put into their craft.

I'm more connected with the inside. I'm not talking to any of my headmates in particular, but I can feel the shape of our system as a whole. We're certainly polyfragmented, there's no doubt about that, no matter what Ken thinks.

I know who I am, in this moment, but the 'I' we'll be later won't remember. But that's okay. Because I'm here now, and this moment is beautiful, and there will be other beautiful moments for our other parts. And I got to write this, thereby immortalizing it in some small way.

Does anyone else ever dissociate in this way? Maybe non-systems, maybe even some neurotypical people? I know it can't be universal, but I hope it's more common than I'd think. It's a lovely feeling, to be here and not here and just feel calm.

[razrogue]

Folks should be mindful when engaging with Black creator's OCs through appreciation type stuff (gifts of fanart/fanfic/etc).

If you're unsure if you're capturing the essence/appearance/personality of their OC, ASK!

I understand wanting to surprise a creator with a gift because you want to show your appreciation for their OC. But that gift is harmful when the creator sees you've whitewashed their OC or applied stereotypes or tropes that aren't a part of the character.

When in doubt, ask

[royalarchivist]

I say this in the kindest way possible, but I think this style of prose is more appropriate for a personal account rather than an update account. I have no idea who's being talked about half the time. 🥲

[ Tumblr meme via @mikaikaika ]

[immult]

it's crazy to me that the only way you can fail the matron's test is by trusting your best friend or mother and caring for their plight. but not as crazy when you know they're a follower of the betrayer and a ruidusborn though, right?

imogen sounds so defeated when she asked if trusting her mother was bad. then imogen repeating the same again to the hells with this really helpless look. because the matron, a near-omniscient being, has written off her mother as something too rotten to be trusted.

"you know your mother best in the end" the way that does not change the fact that YOU have viewed her mother in the worst light. it's killing me but i have to love the consistent portrayal of the holy, at every level of the realm, putting the burden on others to find goodness or redemption in ruidusborns. but until proven otherwise they are personally fine with reducing ruidusborns to caricatures of an evil turncoat.

the matron of ravens was not there when the gods, despite luz/sarenrae's insistence to give it a chance, decided to distrust the rotten fruit and plucked it right off from its tree, setting off their own end.