#I don't care that they don't like it I care that society chose wrong with what to pair with pineapple

[eraserbread]

I would die for curse user! Nanami

you wonder if your friends can see the unease in your face. they're all laughing around you, smoking, drinking and being... friends. it's hard to pull yourself together enough to be here, but you try. they deserve the best, most social part of you.

but its so fucked because he's supposed to be here. nanami wasn't supposed to have run away like he did. and... it's all he did. he ran away in the middle of the night -- took his blade, left his clothes, and disappeared. in the wake, rumors spread like wildfire, your peers saying things like he finally snapped or he just moved to a different country. suguru suggested malaysia -- everyone called him an idiot.

since the night he left, he's been messaging you on an unknown number. little things like;

good morning. miss you.

or

still thinking about you. hello?

tonight it was:

in the city just for a night. i can't meet you on campus.

that's the message you glance down at as shoko hands her smoke over to you. you're left staring at the dimmed screen for a second, and all the attention falls off of satoru's stupid mission story and onto your awkward figure.

"you're good, right?"

no, you're not good -- you want to tell satoru. you want to see their face as you tell them nanami's been in constant contact. you wonder how they'd react. you wonder if they'd react.

as you open your mouth to respond, shoko taps into your side. "hey, you want my wrist to go limp, here?"

the five of you do this every other friday - get drinks and insane plates piled high with sushi at your favorite restaurant, and catch up. it's been easier to do it this way since graduating - most of you stayed on campus, but the few who didn't, you and suguru, didn't show up much at all.

"sorry." you pull a tight-lipped smile, taking it from her hands. she steps out of conversation for a moment, mentioning to haibara how 'if he doesn't take any missions, he won't make any money' or something of the sort. you weren't really listening.

nanami... all you can think about is nanami

nanami. nanaminanaminanaminanami....

"hey- you'll get ash in the food, come on,"

"this is like... the eighth time you disassociated tonight -- what is wrong?"

you don't tell them the truth. instead, you run away.

away from your loving, prying friends and into the arms of your empty apartment and the promise of your nanami. it was so cruel - this hold he has on you. everyone tells you he's a coward, or too unfit to handle his emotions. even the ones he loved just shrug him off, now.

but, not you. never you.

not even when he shows up at the apartment door you guided him to with a grey hoodie over his head.

"i don't expect you to understand." is the first thing he says to you in over a year. "but I would like to explain..."

"ke-kento..."

"let me in, please." then, he looks up at you and through the darkness you can see the small, smoldering fires in his eyes. they were always there, but brighter with age and angst. it's so hard not to cry.

"c'mon."

you're turned around, closing the door when his hands ball into fists at his side. you two's whirlwind high-school romance was long gone, now. all that's left standing in this tiny apartment is a shell of who once loved another.

"then, explain."

so, he wastes no time. if nanami was one thing, it was straight to the point. "I despise watching this society treat my friends as curse bait. none of us chose this."

"but, it's our duty-

"no. it's not." he finally pulls off his hood, still unable to look at you, but all you can look at is him. "our duty is to be human. to work until the day we die, yeah, but not die from our work." he's monotone and familiar, finally meeting your gaze so you can see all of him. shamelessly, you reach to flick the light switch on.

he cut his hair.

"I don't want to be a villain."

you don't even care that he's watching you comb over his body with your eyes. it seems as if this time out of sorcery aged him, but never in a bad way. short hair, mean eyes, strong jawline, and broad shoulders - all of it was new for you, but all of it is nanami.

all you can think to do is shake your head. it's something - some kind of answer.

"and i hope you don't see me as changed... i'm still yours." he gets shy just like he always did, drifting off in volume as he licks your romantic ego.

every cell in your body is screaming to let him in. the want is clawing at your morals, peddling over all of the grief and sorrow and confusion nanami's leaving caused you all. it was so sudden, and he was one of the strongest.

it feels wrong to admit just how healthier he feels when you finally hug him again. there are muscles under your fingertips -- hardened skin and bone you have to dig into to feel the familiarity. you're breathing in his city-tinged, warm colongned musk, breath shuddering and breaking all over his shoulder. he touches you, too. just above your hips, lightly, like he's wary of scaring you off.

a year isn't too long, but it's just long enough for kento to feel unsure about himself.

it didn't matter if he was a dead-man walking, sentenced to execution by a society he once treasured. there's something about you that makes him want to risk it all.

so, he does - elbow-deep in your sweet spirit.

[elodieunderglass]

It's not really my business, but honestly it feels like it would be advisable to hire a copyright lawyer. Like I don't feel like you're in it for the money, but it might be gratifying to have the guy milking your idea at least have to formally acknowledge you. I think I'd do it just for the peace of mind to know if I've been "legally" wronged or not. Either way, hope you continue to inspire, and live out a peaceful life.

(In reference to this post about the guy who pretends to have invented “Elder Teletubbies,” specifically how he is now kickstarting DnD minis of them.)

Ha, well, it’s all a little tricky I think. I might, hilariously, post on the r/legaladvice Reddit (even though they’re all cops lol) because the only thing I want here is for him to stop selling my “transformative work,” and ideally to stop pretending he invented it (which might be difficult as he appears to fully believe his work is creatively independent.)

I think if anything, my post counts as protected commentary or a transformative work of BBC’s Teletubbies, and I think it’s stinky to profit on that stuff in general (like I’m 190% okay with buying LotR fanart on stickers ! but I wouldn’t dream of trying to publish a fic with the serial numbers filed off. Why?)

I think ultimately I’m not a grifter, I’m a grownup, and I think it’s several levels of eye roll to sell fanart of a tv show on this level. I would be embarrassed to touch money made on that. I’m too fucking scrupulous and artisanal. I have toyed with a silly original novel for funsies since 2019 but keep saying things like, “oh, people will think this is too similar to something else that already exists” as if a silly original novel I write for fun has to somehow pass a Bar of Originality higher than anything salary-writers aim for.

I’m also pretty anti-intellectual-property myself in that leftist sense where I don’t believe people should be acting as if creative works are, like, oil. Like the resource extraction angle of intellectual property freaks me out, I don’t think getting super high-horse and snotty about Magical Brain Property is entirely compatible with the artisanal temperament I personally got going on here. I am like snufkin about this, simply smoking a pipe and making a flower crown saying “poor fools! Producing works for market, and serving as the guard dogs of the market, lest their work lose value if it becomes more common!” I do not have a high horse. I am not going to post 6900 words about the importance of defending fucking… Mickey Mouse. I buy those lotr stickers on Etsy! I do have a horse, but it’s a pretty low horse.

If it was his own work I would not care about this guy doing this in the least (apart from loftily calling it stinky - but hey, nerds are common and nerds are stinky, it’s not rare) IF he wasn’t STEALING FROM MY ANTI-COMMERCIALISATION DREAM TO DO IT.

That’s the bit that PISSES ME OFF too much to ignore: that and accepting compliments for being original like 😌 yes my twisted mind did this idk lol.

Like if you asked him point blank about the artistic choices he’d be like idk my twisted mind just sees the Teletubbies this way teehee! but if you ask ME why, for example, the adult Teletubbies live in the forest I’ll explain that in 2017 I was at a major life crossroads and this dream was ABOUT that. It was goodbye to my identity as a foreigner from the pine forests, and full steam ahead to settling permanently in the fucking shire (where the baby teletubbies on the bbc show live). It was about going back to work having had my first child, and saying goodbye to my various career dreams for myself (famous scientist! Published author!) as I chose instead, finally, the responsibility of working humbly as a public servant for the actual good of society. It is about witnessing the wild and saying “I am not of it, but it is my job to be its witness and voice.” That’s why the adult Teletubbies are dancing in my native forests while I’m watching them from the English hills. This guy doesn’t know that he just vaguely heard “spooky forest cryptid” and didn’t develop it at all, I do more work than that with FANFICTION in my time off!!!

So it’s really about nebulous stuff and ethics and not something worth paying a lawyer for I think!

But thank you so much for this, I think the thing that gets most perennial about it is the TOTAL GASLIGHTING of the “outside world” of the rest of the internet like, fully believing they invented this, and they DIDNT. They’re so wrong on the internet and they don’t know

[ngage2003]

There is a joke that always stuck with me from the blu-rays/cast commentary, that being that Jay is a nepo baby and that is how he kept affording motels and gas and food for years, even with no job and a growing obsession. Like a dog to a chewed on and wilting sock, this is an idea I have latched onto and grown unreasonably obsessed with, which I personally believe kind of explains aspects of Jay's character.

⟦content warning: serious headcanon territory, but also still a lot of character analysis bc im coocoo⟧

At the start of the series and even into season 2 of Marble Hornets, I think it could definitely be argued that Jay is a passive character before his continued exposure to the Operator.

Now, that isn't to say he is meek (quiet, gentle, and easily imposed on) but he is very guarded, very willing to fade into the background or just go along with other people. I honestly think that is part of why Alex chose him as script supervisor. Because Alex can be fun but he is bossy and has a very specific vision and likes getting his way. (A trait thats honestly pretty normal, especially in artistic types.)

It is important not to conflate Jay's willingness to avoid conflict with submissiveness, gentleness or a lack of care though. Jay still has his own ideas, and when left to his own devices, a deadly curiosity. (That is why Marble Hornets as an online series started.) He still gets angry too, like when Alex is leading him around in circles because he refuses to/can't kill Jay, but also refuses to tell him what is going on. Jay is forced into action after dealing with this behavior for months, but even before then we see him getting more and more frustrated behind the scenes. (Entry 39 is the first example that comes to my mind.)

It also is important to not misconstrue his selfishness, as many people in this fandom do. Jay Merrick is a bit of a dick. (That is why he gets along with Alex.) He lies to Tim very poorly the first time they meet to get information out of him rather than try to directly ask, he didn't help Masky to the hospital after his leg was broken—yes, he thought what Alex did was wrong but ultimately stayed with him and kept following him for answers. Even with Jessica, part of the reason he cares so much is because he feels guilty/responsible and he is, he pulled her into this out of his damn curiosity!

Statement: I believe Jay holds extreme guilt over Jessica being brought into this and what happened to her. Evidence: in Entry 77, when Tim is saying, "there is two possibilities for what happened to jessica," Jay out of the blue says, "It wouldn’t be my fault!" at about 2:43. Tim never implied it was and the only reason I can see Jay to unprompted say this is because he believes it was.

Jay Merrick is someone defined by curiosity and selfish, but while habitually passive. He lies to hide what he wants and what he is doing, sometimes for an understandable reason but also sometimes out of just, once again, habit.

The question easily comes, why is he like that?

Well! Stick with me here—I think is because Jay Merrick IS a nepo baby. Specifically, I think he grew up in a household where his parents were neglectful, and when he was visiblly upset, that was repaid with harsh rejection and then money or expensive apologies rather than concrete change. It was a situation where, while his needs weren't being met, getting angry at it also feels bad because of how we as a society (and his parents specifically too) worship money.

I think his curiosity partially comes from this neglect too, as growing up his parents brushing off questions and lacking support always left him wanting more but without a way to voice it, leaving him with this lifelong unease and need for answers. His parents kind of forgot what it was like to be a kid and how you literally don't know anything, and would often brush off certain things because of this. Additionally, growing up this way also left him a bit selfish, as coming from a place of wealth, being neglected, and being somewhat isolated growing up as a "weird"/visibly autistic kid, that all left him struggling to connect to people and with his own empathy, as we see in canon. This doesn't make him a bad person inherently or anything, but is just a part of who he is. Aside from the obvious case of Jay dragging Jessica into this, I think an example of this is how in Entry 66, when Tim is laying out all his trauma, there is an interaction that goes like this:

Tim: One of the problems I was having was hallucinations. I had a lot of them. [...] [W]henever they would find me [after i escaped from my room,] I would say that I was hiding from whatever it was I was seeing so they’d bring me back and they didn’t have much of a choice except to lock me in here. That’s when it was at its worse. I’d be clawing at the walls and screaming at all hours of the night, they had to up my dosage just to calm me down, to the point that I was almost numb. Jay: But these hallucinations, what did they look like?

You could say his disregard is due to shock, but in my opinion that'd be a bit too forgiving. Sure, Tim is talking about his awful childhood and he is being pretty vivid but, Jay already knew about it to some extent due to his records, and while generally he is closed off and hard to read, he seems more uneasy with Tim's yelling than shocked. Jay's default is just curiosity and wanting answers, that is just kind of a pattern with him, even/especially at the expense of others.

I think he is so passive also because of his home life. Specifically, that was what made living at home easiest, with parents who like having you as a trophy but don't actually care about you. Keeping your head down is how you survive, and he kind of just accepted that "ok this is how the world works." Everyone wants something from you (a compliment, a second opinion that is more vapid support than substance, praise,) and giving it to them makes it easier. I think Alex wheedled him sometimes to try to get him out of that shell, but to some extent also he liked it, liked having someone who agrees with him, and in turn Jay admired his outspoken nature, blatant hatred of his parents, and tolerance for Jay's "weirdness". (Hyperfixations.) They weren't necessarily super duper healthy, but they were two traumatized kids clinging to each other, and sometimes that's just how the cookie crumbles, especially when you're isolated.

I also think, due to being a late 80s-90s kid, Jay did grow up with the internet and probably to some extent was unmonitored, which definitely influenced and impacted him but also did inspire his love of technology. (Specifically film/cameras.) I think it also to some extent fed into his worse habits by accident though, just the unfortunately common attitudes highlighted by the internet, but also was the original way he sated his curiosity. I think his propensity to tell "white lies," could have easily come from this exposure too.

I have a lot of specific instances tie to Jay's childhood that in my brain define why he is Like That, but this is just an overview of my main thoughts and I hope it makes sense.

[catboybiologist]

do you have any advice for arguing with people who are only passively transphobic?

in a conversation about trans rights they compared trans people to people changing their race and im not experienced enough to actually put into words why that’s wrong

-a cis dude

I've had this one sitting in my inbox a bit, but my thoughts drifted back to it.

First off, this is not "passive" transphobia. This is active transphobia. If they've heard or are using an argument like that, it means they've spent at least some time evaluating their views about trans people, and actively chose to use that argument.

Second off, with that in mind, realize that they are not arguing in good faith. You won't convince them. Not in a couple minutes of conversation, not with a snappy retort. I have a deep nuanced answer to this. I usually don't bother arguing this point, but I do argue about "biologically female" a lot, and in my experience, they don't want to hear any nuanced argument. In fact, they think nuance is a point against you. If it can't be explained "simply", then it's no longer "common sense" and they don't care.

So. Yeah. In general, it's best to assess whether you even should engage in the first place, before you engage.

That said, what is the nuanced argument?

Full disclosure on my perspective, I'm a white, American trans woman, have lived in the US my whole life. I have some immigrant family and friends from various backgrounds. I'm just explaining my perspective here, since there's many nuances that I wont be the best person to talk about, so I welcome correction and additional perspective.

Two things to say here.

First, a spicy take, apparently: I think you can be trans racial. Just, not in the way that people like to think.

Race, like so-called "biological sex", is a set of artificially constructed categories formed from a random collection of physical traits. Which physical traits are chosen as "racial", as well as which traits belong to which race, is dependent on the society you're living in. As culture changes, or as an individual moves through different cultures, there race will often change, making them, in a sense, "trans racial".

Immigrant culture is probably the clearest example of this. I'll use my family history. It's a limited perspective, but I don't want to speak to other people's experiences.

My heritage is from a region of Europe that would probably start shit in my notes just by mentioning it. Racial differences for my family have been perceived based on MUCH different criteria than they have been stateside. Wars and genocides have been enacted over that perception. Those racial categories are "real", not in the sense that they represent innate biological differences, but that they have real effects on how someone navigates through a particular society. If my family had not immigrated, I would be considered a different "race" than people of nearby countries, or within that same country.

And yet. All of that is gone for me. My racial experience is that of a white american. I don't even have an accent. I can keep in touch with my heritage, and I try to, but my "race" as it affects my position in american society, is fully that of a white american. Since I'm born here, it's always been that way. Everyone who would be considered a different race back where my family is from, would probably all be considered white (or "ambiguous" in some cases) here.

Already, this contrasts with immigrant experiences even within my family- treatment dramatically changes depending on where you are, and how much you "assimilate".

I'm only using my background as an example because I don't want to speak for anyone else's experience. No, I'm not saying I'm "trans racial" because someone in my family is an immigrant, I'm just trying to provide a framework from my experience. It's a limited perspective, because my appearance is white. But there are many, MANY other examples. Take someone from India: a massive, consolidated subcontinent with hundreds of thousands of ethnic and cultural distinctions... That are all treated much, much differently when you move that to a different country.

"But Sierra," I hear you say, "this analogy really breaks down when making one to one comparisons. Are you really saying that being something, like a particular race or gender, is solely a function of how society treats you? How does this support transgender identities? Like, someone can't just 'become' black or whatever. I get what you said earlier, but there's still a limited scope of how someone can 'transition' between races in that framework."

An excellent point, which brings me to the next point. Disclaimer, it's kind of stolen from Contrapoints.

Both race and gender are societal frameworks based on pieces of information about an individual, either sex characteristics/presentation, or arbitrary "ethnic" traits.

The difference between these two, however, is who has experience with them. Ethnic groups are, by definition, groups of people with familial lineages and culture shared between them.

Masculinity and femininity, however, are shared experiences for all of humankind. A white person will never have the lifelong experience of being treated as a black person. However, every human being, even cisgender people, are exposed to the enforcement of gender, sex characteristics different than their own, and the policing of those categories. Every single person on this planet has varying degrees of "male" and "female", "man" and "woman", and everything that is neither or both, and has been treated accordingly at different points in their life. The same is not necessarily true about race. Even though biologically, racial differences are essentially nothing (humans are actually a very genetically bottlenecked species), society picks out it's treatment of what it determines to be race, and those experiences become isolated.

Again. These are my thoughts as a white person. If this is trivializing, or poorly represents something, or if I should be corrected, PLEASE let me know. It is, however, an interesting topic.

But crucially, as I mentioned earlier, it's a nuanced topic. And a nuanced answer will get you nowhere with someone arguing in bad faith.

[honeycreammilkshake]

as both a sukuita and sukuna fan, chapter 268 killed me. at first i thought it was because we finally got another really intimate and highly emotional scene between sukuna and yuuji, and that sukuna chose to die over accepting yuuji's kindness, but now i can't stop thinking about how this entire chapter was such a good character study and a metaphor for one of the most important themes in the story.

in chapter 21, there's a really interesting conversation between junpei and mahito, where junpei disagrees with the quote "the opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference." he knows how evil people can be so he chooses to feel indifferent about human suffering instead. mahito's view on this is also really intriguing, especially considering how he is a curse born from the hate people share for each other.

i could be wrong but it sounds like the basic message here is that deadening yourself to such intense feelings — love or hate — is a type of retaliation for being hurt or consumed by them. which makes me wonder if sukuna had a similar story to junpei, and if that explains how he became what he is.

we know that sukuna wasn't wanted as a child. he was more than likely rejected by both normal society and the jujutsu world. like junpei he was probably treated cruelly or strongly made aware of the many people who hated him. sukuna claimed to know what love is, but i think what he actually understood was the absence of love. he understood maybe what it means to others, but he had never felt or experienced it himself.

which brings me back to junpei's idea that indifference should be the solution. this is kind of the same philosophy sukuna has: he believes in this unshakable hierarchy of strength where the weak should have no right to lament their suffering. his idea was that the strongest were indifferent to suffering, that it's greedy to be lonely because of this. he calls it his "nature" to live in this self-indulgent way that is completely uncaring and selfish.

but then there's yuuji.

yuuji has been alone for a lot of his life. at the beginning, he doesn't have any really close friends, since even the other occult club members don't know him all that well. his only family was wasuke, who was difficult and pushed people away, including yuuji.

after his grandfather's death, he wanted to do right and fulfill wasuke's request of helping people, to be able to die surrounded by those he cares about. he pretty much gave his life to help other people by accepting responsibility as sukuna's vessel, and shows concern and kindness even to strangers.

he seems the exact opposite of sukuna and he stands for all the things that the king of curses hates... so why is it that someone sukuna considers so weak has so much power over him?

the only one who's really managed to make sukuna rethink his ideas of the world has been yuuji. even sukuna acknowledged that he was affected more by yuuji than anyone else.

to him, those who challenged him 1000 years ago were "other people." his relationship with yuuji was and always has been so special that even he admits it.

sukuna mostly strived for indifference his entire life. consuming so many humans was merely a way for him to pass the time until death, as he said, and those tastes were passing and unmemorable for the most part. everything was so unfeeling about the way he made his philosophy sound during his conversation with kashimo, and he couldn't answer as to why he would decide to cross the ages into modern life if his life before had been truly satisfactory. it's like he wasn't even moved to support his own ideals.

but here yuuji is... an annoying brat he called weak and boring, yet every time they fought sukuna looked thrilled and even impressed, though he resented it. and every time yuuji challenged him, sukuna was bothered enough to challenge him right back.

"the opposite of love is indifference." if this is true, sukuna was most likely forced into his indifference due to the fact he was never wanted or loved. but yuuji awakened so many feelings inside of him, too many. living as sukuna's vessel, they shared such a close connection while still opposing each other in every single way. yuuji represented the intense feelings of both love and hate in the way he fought so hard for others while sukuna's own indifference started to break the longer he spent inside of yuuji. he was far more reactive to yuuji than with others, and had even given him special treatment. there were many times he could have killed yuuji or his friends, but he didn't.

yuuji has made it clear that he hates sukuna's indifference to the value of people's lives.

sukuna's indifference towards life is against everything yuuji believes in but strangely enough, yuuji was still willing to accept sukuna. to not only pity him, but to have genuine empathy and compassion for such a monster as well.

he even says to sukuna that they are the same, despite seeming to be complete opposites of each other.

to me, yuuji saying that the monster sukuna became was a matter of chance, shows that he understands how indifference cut sukuna off from having a different fate.

there is a vast area of shades between love and hate, unlike the overwhelmingly static state of indifference. yuuji was showing those shades of love and hate to sukuna, telling him that they could live in the mixed shades of both.

and i really wished sukuna chose to coexist with both that love and hate and remain with yuuji. but he was too used to being indifferent and rejected that offer.

i'm really hoping we get to see yuuji's thoughts on this in the next few chapters, because he looked truly disappointed by sukuna's rejection.

[taeaura]

The Hewitts are Hypocritical Religious Cowards - Minor Character Study :)

{Literally just these three but y'know - Monty's sleeping as usual with his lazy ass}

I think Luda Mae fears God; Hoyt doesn't..at least not as much. They were both raised the same, by the same people, in the same environment, of the same religion. But Hoyt was - is, a product of sin, in my interpretation. Hoyt was born of sin and will die of sin; Born to commit the sins of his father. Because of his "predestined" behavior, I think Hoyt views what he's doing as either a form of redemption {for himself and his mother} as well as a final 'fuck you' to God. {Inconsistent ahh religious relationship}

its seems almost as if Charlie views himself as someone who's predisposed to hell. "I was born of sin, I'll die of sin - Might as well have some fun." His experiences in the world most likely drove him away from religion and weakened his faith in God overall - Further fueling this mindset.

In some individuals, religion can develop into a form of psychosis.  I don't think Hoyt has that {on the surface}, but Luda definitely does. I doubt God is going to make you burn for fucking up, Jesus didn't care as long as it was genuine mistake. If he did, everyone would be in hell right now. The only reason Eve was punished is because she prioritized herself and her pleasure over the boundaries of God. That's not the same as messing up, people forget that. But in the case of the Hewitts - They chose the same path as Eve - Just more viciously.

The Hewitts {Hoyt more specifically} prioritized family pride over the lives of other people. They'd rather stay on their land than move away. They'd rather be forgotten by society - Kill and consume outsiders, instead of adapting to another town.

Remember the dinner scene in TCM: The Beginning? Just before Bailey dies, as Chrissie's insulting the family. That right there is the perfect example of the family's philosophy.

C: "I have a question for you, it involves the family tree - the lineage, if you will; So I guess this one's for the table: You guys fuck all your cousins or just the ones you find attractive?"

H: "You blasphemous bitch! This is redemption, lady, that's what this is! Oh, you're all gonna pay for your sins, that's right! And especially you."

Hoyt knows what they're doing is wrong - they all do. Yet they reframe it as "cleansing the world of sin." The mindset "we do what we have to in order to survive."

H: "You starve to death, or survive."

Hoyt views what they're doing as means of survival. They were starving to death - which he explicitly says in the 'first supper' scene

H: "Thanks to the good sheriff here, we ain't gonna go hungry tonight. Matter of fact, we ain't never gonna starve again."

____

Dean deserved to die because he failed his country. His fellow soldiers. Morgan, Kemper, Pepper, Andy, Erin, they all deserved to die for their possession of weed and their disrespect towards the family. Chrissie and Eric deserved it for the same reason. Bailey was with those 'disrespectful draft dodgers.' She was a whore, too - Just as sinful in the eyes of the lord.

stfu Hoyt as if you haven't done worse

Erin and Bailey disrespected Thomas - This would set Luda Mae off so bad. SHE LITERALLY SAID "Get her out of my sight" to Thomas in reference to Erin. She's disgusted by them - Disgusted by anyone who insults her, Thomas, {anyone in the family really}, or God.

L: "I know your kind - Nothing but cruelty and ridicule for my boy, all the time he was growing up. Does anybody care about me and my boy? Huh?"

--

E: "What's wrong with you fucking people?"

H: "Nothing wrong with us..?"

L: "Tommy; Thomas Brown Hewitt, you get in here right now! Get her out of my sight."

--

None of them deserved a second chance. As soon as they stepped onto the property, they solidified their fate. The Hewitts view themselves almost as a necessary evil - Angels of Death, if you will. They kill who they do based on how 'sinful' they are. That includes how they treat the family. {Which I doubt is based on 'respect' being one of God's values - I think it's because of how prideful these people are.}

____

Luda fears God. She fears The Rapture. When Jesus walks the Earth to gather his sheep. The day he waltzes into the Hewitt household taking the form of a 'helpless draft-dodger.' When the molded wallpaper and dusty lace tablecloth aren't enough to hide the rotting carnage, seething beneath the decaying floorboards. As he takes his place at the table, looking down at the family -

"This is redemption, lady, that's what this is! Oh, you're all gonna pay for your sins, that's right! And especially you."

You.

The wailing. The begging. The prayers falsely spoken by your forked tongue.

"I'm not gonna hurt you, honey."

Liar.

A shepherd? No, - Vicious wolves clothed in the skin and cloak of the fallen guardian. Harboring the sheep to their intemperate slaughter - You selfishly feast upon.

Did you feel it?

Do you feel it now?

Whilst the blood spilt from between her legs; Staining your sheets - The same ones Mama's washed over and over for the same selfish reasons.

Rewarding, was it not?

Did the screeches of pain exhort you? - Ravish you. It feels good to take what you deserve.

Except you didn't deserve it; Did you, Charlie.

Not by my teachings - and certainly not by your mother's.

"You poor thing; Sweet mourning lamb. There's nothing you can do - It's already been done."

But she deserved it.

She sinned - Did she not?

And sinners don't deserve patience - Nor do they deserve mercy.

They're vessels possessed by the Devil - You were only doing what's best.

Clearing them out.

And the cowardly - I didn't teach my children to be cowardly, did I? No, I did not. You're not a coward, are you, Charlie? Most certainly not - Not with what you've done to serve your country. No; You're a hero.

Heroes don't rape

Our Hero.

Heroes won't yield

My Hero.

Coward.

And cowards heroes like you deserve a special place in hell Heaven.

____

this is so ass 🙏 #yapville

[chaifootsteps]

wr.t. leaks (spoilers, duh!). Viv really chose the most boring and uninspired rendition of Alastor possible, and I could not be more disappointed. The signs were definitely there in Season 1, but if you wanted to you could easily dismiss as sloppy writing and one-time reactions to extraordinary events.

Like, I know no fan is *entitled* to have their particular interpretation of a character be validated, but... really? He's been reduced to the form of a one-dimensional, entitled manchild you might find as the villain of a self-insert fanfiction. Ohhhh nooo luci hurt his feefees and Rosie didn't actually make him an all powerful god, so time to storm out and whine about it. Why make a deal in the first place? Well, duh, he gleefully murdered so many people for trivial inconveniences he didn't wanna end up a tortured soul in Hell. He's basically Valentino, but, on the 'good team', and not a rapist (yet.), or Adam, or Vox, or Mammon, or Stella (frankly, you could even put Stolas in this bucket, if he weren't so unintentionally manipulative). A parody of a threatening character, incapable of creating conflict in any way that doesn't involve waving around a big stick and reminding everyone and the audience who the author blessed with magical power don't you forget it!

I've said this about pilot!fanon!Lucifer too, but, the fandom interpretations are just objectively more interesting. It's not like you can't write a story, or even a good story, about an entitled man drunk on power obsessed with his own image and getting what he thinks he's owed. But why would you 1) choose an enslaved racial minority character (!!!) to do this and 2) do it instead of multiple more compelling options given you already have multiple of this exact character on the cast?

Fanon!Alastor has emotions other than anger and insecure whining, he just can't express them because decades of crawling his way up two different hostile societies have beaten into him never expressing vulnerability. His very smile is symbol of societies like Hell ultimately victimize both the powerful abusers and their victims. Fanon!Alastor had a deal with ___ not because he's drunk on his own desire to murder but because he's vulnerable to the very same weakness and temptation he's learned to exploit in others. Fanon!Alastor has a natural dual conflict with Charlie: Alastor's connections and practical knowledge represent a way of making her dream a reality, at the cost of potentially corrupting her and having her get there in an incorrect/immoral way. And Charlie's dream presents Alastor with a pathway to more power and stability, but unbeknownst to him threatens to unwind his entire psyche in allowing himself to care about something. Fanon!Alastor, far from being image-obsessed with a need to be constantly in the limelight, is capable of being subtle, fading into the background when it benefits him.

I could go on, but I'm just tired. It hurts me that, come release, fan works which I enjoy making and reading will be expected to comply with this. I don't want to write Alastor this way. I don't want to be told I'm writing him 'wrong' for not doing it. I hope that in some way the earlier fanons are preserved and kept alive even as canon is polluted with all this slop.

It's sad and exhausting, for sure. It also doesn't help that the standom will attack you pretty viciously if you have the audacity to prefer the pilot to the actual series.

[wingedshadowfan]

i have a serious question (pls i need this for a post-hell bent fanfic i'm writing but i read both books a really long time ago)

okay, so you know how darlington was going through dante applications before sandow called him to basically tell him, "sorry man, we actually went ahead and chose your dante for you" bcuz sandow recruited alex at her hospital bed after the events at ground zero (lethe had been watching her to confirm she could see the greys)

we also learn there's an extensive list of dante criteria (which alex fits literally none of, and it's not like she applied for the position anyway), and that alex is the second exception made in lethe history = the second case where the criteria has been ignored/loosened in selecting dante, and the first case was some dude in the 1950s or something, i don't remember??

correct me if i'm wrong but here's the fucking thing. in darlington's memories, we learn the same exact thing happens to him. he grew up in new haven but he wasn't part of the societies: he didn't apply for the position of dante bcuz he didn't know it existed. he had an obsession interest in the arcane, which i believe broke one of the criteria (i don't remember all of them). sandow appeared at his fucking hospital bed after the elixir he'd made to see the grays almost killed him.

so my question is: why wasn't he considered an exception and recorded as such, like alex was?

are there other reasons i'm missing here, according to which he fits the criteria, or did they still make him apply somehow and he got selected by michelle (i seriously doubt it)? or did they not record him on purpose, to burry the fact that they're not following their own protocol or that they're taking advantage of young people who've been through incredibly traumatic shit by promising them a new life? or was it just sandow going rogue and doing that secretly? or does lethe do this everytime they select a dante, since it's likely it also happened to michelle, who was implied to have been suicidal before?? or maybe it was simply that michelle didn't care enough for protocol to write darlington down but he cared enough to write alex down?

[brittscafe]

Hi! I hope you’re doing alright! :) I wanted to request the prompt, “Gentle wipe of your spilled tears after heavy arguments, a simple gesture that shows you how sorry they are for making you shed sad tears instead of happy ones.” with bleach men? Or something close to it! I really just want some heart breaking angst and a happy ending. Thank you in advance, I love your blog!!

ahhh yesss! I love this prompt! <3 <3 I can include the quinces and arrancars in my next post, if you would like!

Ichigo Kurosaki: You rush inside Ichigo's room and slam the door open. Ichigo turns around and you throw your arms around the man.

"What's wrong?" Ichigo asks, running his fingers through your hair as you squeeze him tightly.

"I thought you were hurt," you breath out, pulling away from his embrace. Ichigo's eyebrows furrows and he shakes his head.

"I can take care of myself, you know? I am a substitute soul reaper," Ichigo reassures you with a confident tone.

"I know," you chew on your quivering bottom lip. Your eyes rake over his bruised face, dry blood on his lips. His body shaking slightly and the pain written all over his face.

His breath shudders seeing the hot tears spill down your face. Ichigo stifles a tiny gasp and his heart breaks into a million pieces.

"Y/N," he calls out gently, taking a stride towards you and reaching out. His hand cups the back of your head and he lets out a heavy sigh.

Ichigo brushes his thumb over your face, picking up your tears.

"I just wish I was there to help you. Maybe you wouldn't have gotten hurt if I was there," you sob out, your chest crushing. Ichigo smiles warmly at you and his eyes soften.

"You were there," he speaks carefully, grabbing your hand and putting it on his chest. His heart thumps against your hand and you smile weakly.

Uryu Ishida: Your breath shudders as you walk up to Uryu, standing alone in the soul society, watching as the war between the soul reapers and quincies break out.

His white cape flows in the wind and you gulp.

"Uryu, what are you doing?" you call out, furrowing your eyebrows. When Ichigo had told you that your boyfriend was on the other side of the war, you couldn't believe it.

"What are you doing here?" Uryu asks, his eyes widening at the sight of you as he faces you.

"No, you don't get to question me, not right now! What the hell are you doing?" you raise your voice, speaking through gritted teeth.

Uryu stands there, staring at you in shock. He never expected you to come into the soul society or even find out about this.

"I'm a Quincy. This is my blood," Uryu replies dryly and you scoff quietly.

"You're betraying everyone you know! Are you sure this is the path you want to go down?" you ask, stepping forward.

Uryu reaches out with his hand and he touches your soft skin. His hand cups your cheek and tilts up your face, eyes meeting his.

"Hey..." Uryu calls out and you meet his eyes. The tears race down your face and a frown rests on your face.

"You're breaking my heart," you comment, your voice breaking. Uryu lowers his head with shame and lets out a heavy sigh.

"I know and I'm so sorry, y/n. You'll see why I chose this, soon. I promise, but you need to go back home," Uryu sighs out, wiping away your tears.

"Just...don't break your promise," you demand, stepping back from his embrace.

Renji Abarai: "What the hell was that?!" Renji's voice booms out as he marches over towards you. You wipe the sweat off your forehead and squeeze your sword in your hand.

"What? Me saving your ass?" you scoff quietly, glancing down at the dead hollow on the ground. Renji rolls his eyes with annoyance and scowls.

"I didn't need you to save me!" Renji raises his voice and your taken back by his tone. You take a step back and let out a tiny breath, pondering.

You didn't understand why Renji was being so cold and mean. You just wanted to help your significant other.

"I don't get it, Renji. I was just helping you," you shake your head in denial. Renji's eyes darken and he stomps over to you, towering over you.

"Yeah? Well, I don't need you.”

His words strike you like a knife to the heart and your eyes widen.

"I'm so confused. Don't you appreciate my help? I was just trying to help you!" you raise your voice, your mind rattled with pure confusion.

"You don't get it, y/n! I was trying to prove myself to Captain Kuchiki. I was sent on a mission and I wanted to prove myself. You ruin everything!" Renji shouts out with pure rage.

Your mouth gapes open and your body freezes with shock. You snap your jaw shut and nod your head, tears filling your eyes.

"Okay. I get it," you retort harshly, clenching your jaw.

You went home after that, spent a few hours crying in your shared bed. You were filled with rage, but mostly sadness. How could Renji say something like that?

Your eardrums fill with the sound of the front doors swinging open and your heart skips a beat. Renji's footsteps come closer and closer to your bedroom.

You don't even bother to lift up your head when he enters the room. Renji frowns widely at the sight of you and he lets out a heavy sigh.

He knows what he did was wrong, very wrong. Renji sinks down into the bed and places his hand over your back.

"Baby, I'm sorry," Renji coos out with a soft, comforting voice.

"No, you're not," your voice comes out as muffled.

"I am," he replies.

"I get it, Renji. I get that you were sent on a mission and you wanted to prove yourself to your captain. You didn't have to yell at me," you huff out, lifting up your head.

Renji's eyes widen at your swollen, red face. You glare at him and Renji frowns widely.

"I didn't mean to yell at you. I was mad and I took my anger out on you. I shouldn't have,"

"Yeah, you shouldn't have," you sniffle out and Renji cracks a grin.

"What? Why are you smiling?" you ask, chewing on your bottom lip. Renji places a hand on your jaw, thumb brushing over your cheek, wiping away a tear.

"I'm sorry, but you're so pretty," Renji beams and your eyes widen. You were certain you weren't pretty in this moment. Tears running down your swollen face.

"Whatever," you sigh out, pouting.

"I'm sorry, my pretty girl," Renji speaks softly and you roll your eyes, but you can't help, but crack a tiny smile.

Shinji Hirako: Heated arguments were you and Shinji's thing for sure, but this was too much.

You decided to hide yourself in the bathroom, which was probably not the best place to hide from your boyfriend.

"Y/N, let me in," Shinji sighs in defeat from the outside, leaning his head against the door. You're curled up into a ball, arms wrapped around your knees that are tucked into your chest.

"No," you state firmly, your quivering voice giving yourself away.

"Damn it. Let me in!" Shinji raises his voice, running his hands over his face in frustration.

"Why should I?" you ask, clenching your fists.

"Because...I hate that I hurt you. I hate that I'm stupid and decided to hurt the person that I love the most. I hate that you're in here all alone, crying and I can't comfort you. I know that I don't deserve to, but please, y/n, let me in," Shinji explains with a raspy voice.

His words send a chill down your spine and you gulp. You sit in silence for a moment, before deciding to stand up and unlock the door.

Shinji swings open the door and his heart stops beating for a moment. Your red puffy face along with your tear stained cheeks is enough for even Shinji's heart to break.

He throws his arms around you and holds you tightly.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," he whispers repeatedly, peppering kisses all along your face.

It felt so good to be in his arms, in his comfort.

"Shinji, I know," you mumble out in his chest. Shinji's body fills with relief. You didn't need to forgive him, he just needed you to know how sorry he is.

Jushiro Ukitake: I find it very hard to believe that this man made you cry. Anyways...

Emotions were running high as you and Jushiro argued back and forth. Both of your roaring voices fill the room and you end up with tears streaming down your face.

Jushiro wastes no time in rushing up to you as he feels horrible for making you cry. You bite down on your quivering lip and Jushiro gingerly places his hand on your cheek.

"I'm sorry," you hiccup out between sobs and Jushiro's eyes widen.

"Why are you apologizing? It's not your fault," Jushiro furrows his eyebrows with confusion and you shake your head.

"But it is, I started the argument. Now, I'm the one crying just because of what you said," you stutter out, your body slightly trembling.

Jushiro shakes his head. He cam't believe what he's hearing right now.

"No, don't you dare be sorry. What I said was not okay and I'm sorry that I said that," Jushiro speaks gently and you sniffle, wiping your wet face.

"I feel like such a baby," you sigh out, lowering your head in defeat.

"I never want to make you cry, y/n. Please, forgive me, sweetheart," Jushiro begs you, tears in his eyes. He leans his head down and presses his warm lips to your forehead.

You clutch onto his forearms and relish in the moment.

"I will always forgive you, Jushiro," you whisper, smiling up at him.

Shunsui Kyoraku: Your body trembles as your sob tears through your body, unable to muffle your sounds of sadness. You clench your fists and Shunsui's stomach twists into uneasy knots at the sound of your crying.

He glances at you over his shoulder and his mouth gapes open. You glare at him with tears burning your eyes and he leaps towards you.

Shunsui grabs onto your shoulders and your body jolts.

"No. Get away from me," you demand, pressing your hands into his chest and shoving him back. Shunsui's eyes widen and he lowers his head with shame.

He had hurt you and he dreaded it.

You turn around, burying your face in the palm of your hands. Your face burns and Shunsui clears his throat, collecting himself and his emotions.

"Shunsui," you call out as he wraps his arms around your waist from behind.

"I'm sorry. I am so sorry," he whispers with a hoarse voice, dipping his head down into the curve of your neck.

"I'm sure you are," you retort harshly, feeling your walls start to break down. You lower your gaze to the ground and Shunsui lets out a heavy sigh.

"Y/N, let me comfort you. Let me take away the pain and hurt that I caused you. Please," Shunsui pleads with you in a ginger, soft voice.

You slowly turn around, facing him and you chew on your lip, pondering. You meet Shunsui's soft, loving gaze and you frown widely.

You step forward and throw your arms around his torso, burying yourself into his chest. Shunsui rests his chin on top of your head and grips you tightly.

Kenpachi Zaraki: You were silent. Deadly. Deadly silent. So, deadly silent as a tear runs down your cheek.

He easily catches your wrist and pulls you closer to him. Kenpachi towers over you and you gulp. Kenny wears a blank expression on his face, but his eyes are soften, so is his touch.

"Were my words too harsh, y/n?" Kenpachi asks with a deep, rough voice. Your lips tremble as you slowly glance up at him, trying to hold yourself together.

"Um, I guess. I don't like when we yell at each other like that, especially when we we're arguing over something so...so stupid," you explain yourself, your voice trembling.

Kenpachi steps closer to you as the tears stream down your cheeks. He leans down towards you and slowly raises his hand. You close your eyes at his soft touch, wiping away your tears.

"I am sorry for raising my voice," Kenpachi speaks truthfully and you nod your head.

"I'm also sorry, Kenny," you sigh out with shame, grabbing onto his large hand and squeezing it. You both share a kind smile, knowing that you will always forgive each other.

Byakuya Kuchiki: Although, he hides his emotions well, he could not help the frown tugging on his face. A single tear drags down your face and drips off of your chin onto the ground.

Byakuya's eyes watch as the tear falls onto the ground and his eyes widen. His heart pulse beats in his ears, blocking out all other sound.

His words were too harsh, cruel, and unruly for him.

Byakuya's muscles tense, but he dare not make a move towards you.

"I take it back. I take all this words that I said back," he speaks up and you slowly lift up your head, meeting his steady, unwavering gaze.

"You can't take them, Byakuya. That's not how this works," you mumble out and his mouth slightly gapes open. His mouth runs dry and he nods his head.

"I know. If I could, I would turn those words into blossom for you, my love. I don't know what I would do without you. My words were hurtful, even I, myself, was taken aback by them. I cannot express how sorry I am," Byakuya speaks gingerly, crouching down onto his knees.

You furrow your eyebrows as Byakuya tenderly grabs onto your hands, pressing them against his forehead. Your stomach twists into uneasy knots as you realize what he's doing.

Byakuya has never really bowed down to anyone in his life, but here he is. Right in front of you, on his knees for you.

"Please, forgive me," he begs you, a trembling voice. His thumbs brush over your hands and you let out a deep sigh. You bring yourself down to your knees and Byakuya slowly lifts his head up.

"You need not bow down to me, Byakuya. We are on the same level as equals, right? That's what you said to me when we first met," you explain, cupping his cheek.

"Yes, I remember," he bobs his head.

"Good. Then, I forgive you as long as can forgive me," you speak gingerly and his eyes widen.

"Of course," he speaks eagerly as you pull his face closer to yours. You smile warmly and press a soft kiss to his lips.

Mayuri Kurotsuchi: The shower starts running in your bedroom and you furrow your eyebrows. You leap up from your bed and rush into the bathroom.

The steam fills the room and you lean against the wall. You grab the shower curtain and slowly peel it back. Mayuri stands in the hot water, letting it drip down his body and soak his hair.

"I didn't know you were home," you comment, a slight smile on your face.

"I'm tired," Mayuri shrugs his shoulders, running his fingers through his electric blue hair.

"I'm tired of the nights when you aren't beside in bed. I miss you," you sigh out, a frown tugging on his face.

"You know how it is. The experiments take a very long time and it has to be precise," he rambles on and you nod your head.

"Yes, I'm aware," you reply dryly.

"I can't spend every waking moment with you! You can't be attached to my hip," Mayuri raises his voice and your jaw drops open.

"I get it," you sigh out.

"Do you really? Because it seems like you don't. You're my girlfriend, not my goddamn dog!" Mayuri shouts out and your lips tremble.

"I feel like an object to you, Mayuri. Like one of your experiments," you sigh out and Mayuri rips open the shower curtain. He glares at you with anger and his fingers wrap around your jaw, tightly.

The tears escape from your eyes and Mayuri shakes his head, inhaling sharply with anger.

"You're wrong. My experiments are nothing like you. They are not fragile, delicate, and full of love. I do not love my experiments the way I love you, y/n. Do you understand me?" he speaks harshly and you nod your head.

"Y-yeah," your voice stutters our, your expression dropping. Mayuri's eyes soften and he pulls you closer.

"Hey, come here," Mayuri beckons with a soft, raspy voice. He wraps his arms around you and your head rests on his shoulder.

"I've missed you, too. More than you know," Mayuri comforts you, rubbing circles on your back.

Tōshirō Hitsugaya: "What?" you mumble out, furrowing your eyebrows at your boyfriend.

"You heard me," Toshiro snaps at you and your breath shudders. Your stomach twists into uneasy knots as Toshiro starts to turn his back on you.

"You cannot be serious. You can't actually agree with that," you shake your head in disbelief.

"I do!" he turns back, facing you. His nostrils flare with anger and smoke practically hisses out his ears.

"This is someone's life we are talking about. It's a serious matter," you speak harshly, clenching your fists.

"I know that and I stand by my decision," Toshiro scoffs out, shaking his head. You chew on your bottom lip, tears welling up in your eyes.

"God, you are ice cold!" you raise your voice, echoing in the room. He scoffs quietly and rolls his eyes with annoyance.

"Whatever," he replies dryly. You clench your fists, your bottom lip start to bleed from how hard you're biting it. The hot tears sting your cheeks and Toshiro's gasps quietly.

"Stop. Stop it right now," Toshiro demands, marching up to you and grabbing onto your face.

"Stop, Toshiro!" you cry out, pressing your hands to his chest and pushing him away. He stumbles back slightly and he inhales sharply.

"I can't handle it when you cry, y/n. So, please, stop," he begs you with despair straining his voice. You glance over at him through your eyelashes and sniffle, wiping away at your wet face.

He steps forward and grabs onto your hand, interlacing your fingers. He pulls you closer to him and his free hand cups your jaw, thumb brushing over it.

"I'm so sorry," he mumbles out, pressing a soft kiss to your lips.

Kensei Muguruma: "So, you think I'm weak?" you scoff out, shaking your head with disbelief. Kensei glares over at you from his stance a few feet away from the bed that you're sitting on.

"I just can't believe that you got put away with such a move from your opponent. You weren't strong enough, y/n," Kensei comments with a careless tone.

"Are you serious? Is that actually how you feel about me?" you ask, your mouth gaping open.

You couldn't believe the words that were coming out of your boyfriend's mouth. They were hurtful and harsh.

"You know exactly how I feel," he retorts harshly and you chew on your bottom lip.

"You're right, I do now," you gulp, standing up from the bed. You rush over to the door and grab onto the handle.

"Where are you going?" Kensei sighs out, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I don't know, just away from you. You obviously don't want to associate yourself with your weak girlfriend, right?" your voice wobbles as you glance over your shoulder at him, tears filled up to the brim of your eyes.

Kensei's expression slightly softens and he clears his throat. "That's not what I meant," he speaks with a careful tone and you roll your eyes with annoyance.

"No, it is and that's fine. I want you to be honest with me and you were. I'm not good enough for you, Kensei. You've made that clear," you demand and Kensei's eyes soften.

"What?" he scoffs out, shifting his weight. You blink and the tears start to roll down your cheeks. You sniffle and quickly wipe them away, but the tears keep coming.

Kensei rushes up to your side and grabs onto your shoulders, steadying you in front of him.

"No, y/n, that's not what I meant. I'm scared. I'm scared of losing you. I don't think you're weak, y/n. I think you are a very strong soul reaper, but I cannot lose you," Kensei explains with a soft voice and your eyes widen.

"Why didn't you just say that?" you sniffle out, your body rattling.

"You know me. I'm not good with expressing my feelings and emotions. I don't like to be vulnerable, but I try to be because of you."

You step forward and cup Kensei's cheeks. The hues of cheeks turn a bright pink and he gulps.

"I understand it now, Kensei. All you had to do was explain," you comment, smiling warmly.

"You make me a better person, y/n. Thank you," Kensei whispers, wrapping his arms around your waist and burying his head into the crook of your head.

Rojuro Otoribashi: Rojuro is always very careful with his words, but not this time. His words were mean and harsh. His eyes lock onto the tears dripping down your face and his eyes widen.

A frown tugs on his face and he walks over to you. His large hands cup your face and you sniffle, your body jolting.

"Y/N, are you okay? I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that," Rojuro shakes his head, thumb brushing your skin gently. You glance up at him, vision blurred because of the tears.

His thumb starts to brush away your wet tears and his eyes become soft. His blonde hair falls down into his face and your lips tremble.

"No, it's okay. I shouldn't be such a baby," you shake your head, trying to tug away from him, but his grip is too strong.

"Hey, no, it's okay. You're not a baby. I am so sorry for my choice of words and not being gentle with you. I promise to be more gentle with you," he speaks gingerly, fingers carefully pressing into your cheeks.

You gulp and nod your head as he leans his forehead against yours, smiling warmly.

Kisuke Urahara: After a big argument, Kisuke left the shop to be by himself for awhile. He enters the shop again and his eardrums fill with quiet sobbing.

His eyes widen and his breath hitches in his throat. He makes his way to the back of the shop where your room is. You're sitting on the ground, back pressed up against the wall and knees brought up to your chest.

He rushes over to your side and kneels down, arms wrapping around you and bringing you to his chest.

"Where did you go?" you mumble out between hiccups and sobs. A frown tugs on Kisuke's face and he clenches his jaw.

He's mad at himself. He shouldn't have left you after the argument, it was a horrible idea.

"I shouldn't have left the store. I just needed space, but I wasn't thinking about what you needed. I won't ever leave again, I promise," he reassures you, fingers brushing through your hair.

Izuru Kira: Your fists are clenched as your throat tightens up, tears welling up to the brims of your eyelids. Izuru lets out a heavy sigh, running his hands over his face with frustration.

He lifts his head up and his eyes lock onto you from across the room. You chew on your bottom lip, blood starting to spill out as you try not to cry.

"Whoa, hey, hey," he calls out, fear flooding his body as he rushes over to you. He grabs onto your shoulders and carefully pulls you closer to him.

He pulls you into your chest and you wrap your arms around his lower torso, tears staining his soul reaper uniform. His hand runs over your hair, brushing it down.

"There's no need to cry, y/n. I like you better when you're smiling and laughing," he comments and you let out a tiny chuckle.

"Me too," you mumble out, squeezing him.

Ikkaku Madarame: A gut wrenching sob leave your lips and Ikkaku gasps quietly. He leaps over to you and his arms wrap around your waist.

The two of you stumble around, falling back onto the bed.

"Oh, god. I'm sorry," his voice is filled with panic and worry. You gaze into his soft eyes and you let out a loud giggle, filling the room.

Ikkaku furrows his eyebrows and he stares at you in confusion. You bring up your hands and cup his cheeks, throwing your legs over his.

"I'm sorry for laughing. I just didn't expect to fall on the bed," you shrug your shoulders as his hands gently wipe away your wet tears.

"I love the sound of your laughter," he nuzzles his head into your chest, arms securely wrapping around your waist and squeezing you tightly.

The both of you forgot what you were even arguing about as you laugh and chat about the accidental fall.

Shuhei Hisagi: His blood runs cold as the tears drip down off your jawline and onto the ground.

"Y/N?" Shuhei calls out and your bottom lips quivers. You slowly shift your eyes up and meet his. Your cheeks flush with embarrassment and you gulp.

"I'm sorry," you mumble out, turning around and burying your face into the palms of your hands. He slowly walks over to you and wraps his arms around your waist from behind.

He rests his chin on your shoulder and presses a kiss to your earlobe.

"Don't ever be sorry. I should be the one apologizing. I shouldn't have said those things, I'm sorry," he speaks tenderly as you lean back into his body.

You glance down at his hands, resting on your stomach and you place yours on his, letting out a shaky breath.

"I'm sorry, too. It was stupid to argue over something like that," you shake your head and Shuhei nods his head.

"I hate arguing with you," he admits and a smile tugs on your face. You turn around and wrap your arms around his neck, bringing your lips to his.

"Then let's stop arguing," you smile, kissing him softly.

[kakarotcake]

Had a giant early morning realization on why I enjoy Gochi as much as I do. (I wrote a lot in this; there's a TLDR at the end but please read through my hopefully-coherent rambling to get full context.)

It's specifically because of how non-conventional they are. They didn't date / go through a courting phase before they got married. They barely knew each other at all in fact. Yet, Goku felt unbothered enough to honor a promise he made as a child, and agreed to go forward with the marriage anyway. Chi Chi stayed committed to Goku's promise, despite how she didn't know him, and literally got his consent as an adult first before they went on.

And they made it work.

I so wish we got to see the 5 years of Goku and Chi Chi living together + the early years of Gohan's youth, but specifically because I would like to see just how they each adapted to their new living situation. But regardless, the fact remains that they STAYED together. Chi Chi for sure would've left Goku if she was that unhappy with how Goku just isn't a conventional guy when it comes to relationships. Going home to her dad and resuming being Fire / Frypan Mountain's Princess was always right there as an option. Hell Chi Chi's been identified as an attractive lady in-universe, so she could probably meet someone new before long! But she didn't take it. IIRC, she never has.

I also feel like Goku would also get up and leave if he was unhappy. He's never had to force himself to sacrifice his own happiness for someone else as he lived on Paozu by himself for years, then spent the rest of his teenhood traveling around & training, so if presented with that kind of scenario he wouldn't think twice before being like "ok whatever, see ya" and just peacing out. He wouldn't see the point in staying, since why would he make himself stay somewhere he isn't welcomed or doesn't feel welcome? Grandpa Gohan's old home was always there for him.

My personal biggest gripes with their relationship have honestly never been because of how they had little chemistry before they got together. For me it's always been about how Chi Chi is just treated like a joke by the writer(s); she follows an angry housewife stereotype. Sure, it's supposed to be a joke and she's supposed to come off as comedic, but it only ends up doing damage because it encourages you as a viewer to not take Chi Chi or her relationship with Goku seriously. (I'm ignoring Goku here, but his writing in DBS *anime wise at least* is atrocious and further fed into this btw.)

Yet, from what I've seen over the years in the western fanbase, people's biggest issues with Gochi (aside from general Chi Chi hatred) is because it isn't a conventional relationship. It had hardly any chemistry going into it. I understand that logic, don't get me wrong, but I only understand it when I factor in society's amatonormative & allonormative lens. And I hate both of those things. Gochi not complying with them is what I find charming about the ship.

They didn't date or establish a super deep bond or whatever, yet they lived together in peace for 5 years. They continued to bounce off of one another throughout Z. Chi Chi NEVER remarried or even dated someone while Goku was dead for 7 years. She was crying happy tears when he finally returned at the end of the Buu saga. Goku was more than happy to go home with her and their kids (and tbh I'm 99.99% sure he wouldn't have minded if Chi Chi chose to get with someone else - he chose to stay dead after all). OBVIOUSLY they care for one another a lot, despite how they married each other as strangers. They themselves are narrative (if that's the right word) proof that conventional love & romance & whatever don't guarantee successful marriages. I adore that.

And it's funny because Vegebul is a pairing that also had little to no chemistry going into it, but unlike with Gochi, the no chemistry actually does hurt it for a couple of reasons (all of them revolving around how Vegeta was/is a terrible person) that I won't get into here because it'll derail this post and it's long enough already. I just wanted to point that out in text myself first, before other people came at me trying to argue it.

Anyway. TLDR Gochi as a ship defies amatonormative & allonormative concepts regarding intimate relationships. "You have to date / court someone first, fall in love with them, then marry them because marriage will make sense & be healthy then." They didn't do the first two parts, but after getting married, they're happy together. They spat in the face of societal norms & expectations.

[francesderwent]

been thinking about the whole “women in their thirties are refusing to get married and have kids because they’re selfish and ungodly and that’s what’s wrong with today’s society” shtick and what I think is this.

sometimes, women are single on purpose through their own choice. I’m one of them. I wasn’t in a relationship from the ages of twenty-two to thirty. I went on a very few first dates and even fewer second dates, and in every single one of those cases I was the one who said "thanks but I don't think we should pursue this any further", which isn't even to say anything about all the dates I turned down right off the bat and all the casual overtures I rebuffed. and those men weren't vicious monsters, they were all more or less basically decent. I could have married any one of them - even the ones I wouldn't go on first dates with. if I wanted to be married, I could have been. I chose not to be.

and it does have something to do with the fact that I was used to being single, but not in the sense of not having any room in my life for somebody else, not wanting to put in the work, not wanting to live for someone else. because anybody who's been single for a long time will tell you the only saving grace is filling your life with meaningful friendships and family relationships you can sacrifice for and be vulnerable in. a single life isn't necessarily a life where you're accountable to no one. sometimes it's a life where you're accountable to a whole lot of people, all at once, pulled in a lot of directions, trying to balance a lot of plates.

and the kicker is, when you have a life that's full like that, and you're used to it - when that's the firm status quo and you're not caught up in the rollercoaster of dating a lot and comparing new partners to old partners - then, when you do let a new person into your life, you can tell very quickly whether they make your life better or not. some people, you can comfortably date them and they're not going to make your life worse, but they don't add anything besides an excuse to get out to coffeeshops and restaurants and the movies. and some people, as soon as you start getting to know them, their influence starts creeping into the whole of your life because they make you want to be better all the time. I like to think the second kind of person would shine no matter when you met them, no matter what else was going on at the time. but in certain circumstances the first kind of person can shine, when they’re surrounded by a muddle of people who have made your life worse. so taking a step back from the muddle and being very careful who you let into your life in a big way isn't selfishness, or disrespect for marriage and family. it’s actually a kind of prudence.

I could've married any of those men who asked me out in my twenties. I chose not to, because they were just okay. and eventually, I met my current boyfriend, who makes me want to be a better daughter and sister, who encouraged me to stop bottling everything up and suffering in silence so that I could actually be emotionally vulnerable, not just with him but with my friends and family!, who has deepened my faith by showing me what agapic love looks like.

and I wasn't guaranteed any of that. when I was turning down dates and ending fledgling relationships, I had no way of knowing that this was even possible. but I think I made the right decision - and if he'd never turned up, I still think I would've made the right decision. Lizzie didn’t know that she would marry Mr Darcy, a man she loved and truly respected and admired, when she turned down Mr Collins. but she was right to turn down Mr Collins.

[everpresence]

stop caring about what others think: the law perspective

hi, everyone! ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

i've thought about writing this post for a while, especially since this is a mindset that i am freeing myself from. i know i'm not the only one who grew up in the state of being a people pleaser, so this is for people who were programmed to neglect their own desires and give in to pressure from family, friends, and society.

the other day, my mom noticed that i had a really long gray strand of hair. i didn't believe her at first, but when she pulled it out and showed it to me, i was shocked. it looked like it had been there for months, and i wondered to myself what i did for this to happen.

seth said that your physical body is a reflection of your beliefs, or your dominant dwelling state. if you notice that there is something "wrong" with your body, then you must first look into your thoughts and emotions over the last few weeks, months, etc.

Physical symptoms are communications from the inner self, indications that we are making mental errors of one kind or another. ♡ Seth (channeled by Jane Roberts), The Seth Material

after seeing that gray hair, i knew that it was because of stress. okay, what was i stressed about? i started looking back into what i had dwelt on over the last few months, and i realized that i was stressed out about a lot of things. what stood out, though, was my inner conversations about my family. i was mainly dwelling on what my family thought of me, whether i was worthy of their approval or not, if they were proud of me, etc.

in other words, i cared way too much about how they think and feel about me that it had translated to not only having that long gray strand of hair, it also translated to other physical symptoms (chronic fatigue, chest pain, rashes).

and not only did it translate to those physical symptoms, it also translated to my thoughts, emotions, and the events i was experiencing in the 3D. in other words, everything out here is a reflection of your inner state of being. the cause is always inner.

i found myself feeling more anxious about talking to my parents, wishing that they didn't bring up anything that i really don't want to do. i even avoided them for a certain period of time because of this fear. and since the law is always working 24/7, they ended up bringing it up way more often since i frequently dwelt on what i don't want to hear.

thankfully, though, if i decide to do the opposite (i.e., dwelling on what i want to hear instead), then the 3D has no choice but to outpicture what i choose to experience with my inner senses.

when you consistently dwell on people pleasing, on your fears and doubts about your family, peers, etc., these are all going to be translated into your thoughts, your emotions, your physical body, your experience—everything.

when you care too much about what other people think, when you consent to someone else's limiting beliefs about reality, when you care about external validation, it is only hindering your infinite potential. you are only going to experience such limitations and unhappiness in your reality because you chose to try to fit into someone else's box.

As long as you're in a state of consciousness where you care so much what other people think and what their attitudes will be, you're not going to get very far. ♡ Reverend Ike, "Your Unconscious Fear of Success Affirmation"

i am not saying this as a way to fearmonger, or to blame, or to guilt-trip you. that's not my intention.

i am saying this for you to fully realize the connection between your inner world and your outer world.

nothing is random. nothing is an accident. you are always getting what you concentrated upon, and therefore, you ultimately have the responsibility to choose what reality you want to experience.

you're the only one that can free yourself from these states. no one else can do that for you.

the more you focus on being true to yourself, the more you shift your focus from making other people happy to letting yourself be happy, the more you're going to experience the happiness that comes with the authenticity of your unique being.

yes, it might feel hard to do so at first, but that's because we have made a habit out of wanting to please other people and being rewarded with external validation. it is what we have gotten used to since the beginning of our lives.

however, if you want to be the best version of yourself, you must give up all inner conversations about what other people think of you, that what they think about you matters. stop the arguments in your head. their thoughts and opinions about you have no power over you unless you choose to give it to them. it only matters what you think and feel about yourself.

your inner world is your refuge, where every single reality you desire to experience and is already promised to you exists in this present moment. everything is happening all at once. here, you can experience how it'd feel now that you are free to be yourself, to do whatever you want, to be unconditionally loved and accepted no matter what. you must make this a habit, and the more often you do this, the easier it gets.

I must consciously return to my new state constantly. I must feel its naturalness, like my own bed at night. At first the new state seems unnatural, like wearing a new suit or hat. Although no one knows your suit is new, you are so conscious of it you think everyone is looking at you. You are aware of its fit and its feeling until it becomes comfortable. So it is with your new state. At first you are conscious of its strangeness; but with regular wearing, the new state becomes comfortable, and its naturalness causes you to constantly return to it, thereby making it real. ♡ Neville Goddard, "The Perfect Image"

if you find yourself going back to those old inner conversations, don't beat yourself up over it. don't criticize yourself. it's okay. consciousness is the only reality, but you are also having a human experience. you are on your own journey, and this is completely normal. be gentle with yourself and let those thoughts and emotions pass over, as they are only temporary. then choose to continue to let yourself dwell on who you really want to be within.

to wrap this post up, i have a song recommendation :]

i stumbled upon this song on spotify by paris hilton which features rina sawayama (I LOVE HER BTW RAHHHHHH). perhaps the lyrics will resonate with you guys and allow yourselves to enter the feeling of being your authentic self.

[akiizayoi4869]

I don't understand why people make excuses for Ursa. It is true that she got into a bad situation with a bad husband. That doesn't excuse her. She is still a bad mother to both Azula and Zuko. Her actions in the comic led Ozai to deliberately start treating Zuko worse. Ursa decided to hide behind the baby just to see if the pet tyrant was reading her mail. She just took advantage of the child for her own gain. Just like Ozai. Ursa's favouritism was bad for Zuko and distanced him from his sister. Ursa's indifference led Azula to Ozai

They make excuses for Ursa because she was in an abusive/arranged marriage, and they think that she had zero agency or control over anything. Which isn't entirely true. Because if that was the case? Her relationship with Zuko wouldn't have been what it was. She could still make choices in how she raised her children. And sadly a lot of her choices weren't great. Like you and plenty of other people have said, anon, her favoritism towards Zuko screwed up Azula. It also didn't do any favors for Zuko either. You aren't supposed to favor one kid over the other one, I don't care how "difficult" you think the other child is. And it's crazy because we see how favoritism is like a curse in this family. We are told by the narrative that playing favorites with your children is a bad thing (unless you favor Zuko apparently, then it's all fine and dandy🙄) and that you shouldn't do it. But you see what I just said in the parenthesis? That's where the problem is. We're shown/told that the favoritism is wrong.....unless the favoritism is towards Zuko. Both Ursa and Iroh, two adults that were considered "good" in comparison to Ozai, favored Zuko over Azula. And this is shown not as a bad thing, but as somethings that's fine and accepted because he is the "good" child, and that he acted in the perfect way an abuse victim is supposed to act in society's eyes, while Azula wasn't. Therefore she wasn't deserving of anyone's love like Zuko. Which is an extremely fucked up thing to do to a child who had no control in anything. I mean seriously, the fact that Ursa had Azula thinking this?

100% shows that she was a bad parent, plain and simple. Like I'm sorry but if the impression that I gave my child is that I feared them and thought that they were a monster, I'm not patting myself on the back and accepting the mother of the year award. Being in an abusive marriage does not absolve you from doing shitty things to other people, and I'm so tired of this fandom acting like it does. What I find to be so ironic about this though, is that these are the same people who, when we point out that Azula is a victim of abuse and that's why she is the way that she is in the show, they'll say "so what, that still doesn't excuse her. She could have changed but she chose not to." Say this to them about Zuko and Ursa though, and suddenly they start singing a different tune. Funny how that works.

[vympirestake]

Hello, could I please request head cannons for: Veronica Sawyer, poly Billy and stu, brahms heelshire, and marko from the lost boys where their s/O is very insecure about how they look and always wear a mask and maybe their reaction to seeing their face for the first time.

— Insecure Masked S/O

— Various x GN!Reader, just fluff, headcanons

— Mentions of insecurity, a little bit of bullying maybe

═════════════════════════════

— Veronica Sawyer

Veronica is your knight in shining armor, your protector and biggest supporter

Her alliance with the Heathers makes it so, if she so chose, she could squash anyone who dare try to shun you either for your mask or (this bring a semi small town) your actual face if they've seen it

She's always quick to your defence, whether or not you were going to defend yourself she is chewing everyone out and moving you to where she can check up on you

Literally starstruck when she sees your face

She's more gentle than the others, opting to gently brush her fingertips along your cheeks, across your jaw, smoothing your hair down if the mask had covered it

She is really just in awe, wanting to make you feel wholly loved and appreciated for everything you are

If anything, she gets more protective of you. Feeling as though, because you entrusted her with the barest part of you, she needs to keep it safe

For a complete sidenote, I think in this AU instead of thirsting for Veronica, JD sees himself in her fierce passion for you (and he just thinks you're neat, probably always talking down society and norms to encourage you) so he ropes her into killing in your name

═════════════════════════════

— Poly Ghostface

In a couple words, the general idea is that these boys would kill and be killed for you

This goes for really just in general, mask or no mask, but the fact that you are so insecure almost seems to triple this instinct

You can bet they're shoved right into your sides whenever you're in public, staring down and threatening anyone who even looks at you funny

When you finally decide to show them your face they both sit in their anxious anticipation

They'll love you no matter what, don't get me wrong, but they don't want to mess this up and make you more uncomfortable

When you actually show them they both just sit there like :0, literally in the gif just wide eyed with their mouths slightly agape

Stu giving a quiet whisper of "woah, man" before diving in to finally kiss your face for the first time

Billy (lowkey pissed Stu beat him to it) moves the blonde out of the way so he can get his smooch too, both assuring you beyond a shadow of a doubt that they love you masked or not

Billy especially gets almost a power thrill from seeing your face, knowing he's one of a very select few to actually see you which, in his mind, makes you all the more his

═════════════════════════════

— Brahms Heelshire

Of anyone, Brahms is going to understand your insecurities the best

Your mask is probably what made him comfortable in his choice to finally reveal himself

He knew that you wouldn't judge or be afraid of him purely because of his face or his way of hiding it

When you do finally reveal your face to Brahms, he is filled with nothing but pure adoration

He knows that taking off your mask, removing that layer of security, and being so very vulnerable around him makes Brahms fall that much deeper in love with you

Unfortunately, this probably means he would end up staring for an uncomfortably long amount of time, nearly making you regret removing the mask in the first place

Before you could fathom apologizing Brahms, in turn, removes his own mask

It's such a gentle moment, quietly and with so much care exploring the newly revealed skin of the other

═════════════════════════════

— Marko

While Marko doesn't necessarily understand your insecurity, he nontheless tries his hardest to make sure you're more or less as comfortable as possible

He strives to make you as comfortable in your own skin as he can

He's always right by your side, offering a comforting hand or a moment alone

You know the other boys are always checking back on you two, especially looking out for Marko flagging down their newest meal who thought being disrespectful towards you would be ok

Marko has an interesting opinion on it, knowing that his "human" face is really only a mask for the vampiric one but it makes him not as serious as the others might be

Not to say he doesn't understand the importance of this! But more that he feels the removal of the "mask" is empowering and therefore should be celebrated

So when you remove the mask for the first time, he's whooping and hollering

"yeah! that's my s/o" while he bounds up to kiss you

probably immediately shows you his vampire face (if you haven't seen it already) so you can finally see each other bare

[bibibbon]

Hey Let play a game! I’m gonna say stuff about a character and you have to guess who this character (note:sorry for any grammar error)

1-He use his quirk on a person (who he act possessive over) when this person said no.

2-He act asshole towards Izuku.

3-He think Izuku doesn’t deserve OFA.

4-He mentored a boy who look oddly similar to this person he act possessive with.

5-He think he have the right to say about OFA.

6-He think he have to say about the life of a person (who , again act possessive) with excuse that “he care about him/that for his own good”.

You probably thinking I was talking about AFO

Wrong!

I was talking about Nighteye

( Obviously AFO is way worse person than Nighteye , but what I trying to say that if I was Yoichi/the OFA users I will feel uncomfortable and angry the way Nighteye acting towards All Might and Izuku (and Mirio) )

I am going to be so honest when I was first reading this. The first character that came to mind wasn't AFO, but it was Bakugo. That is until statement 4, and then I started to think of AFO.

Respectfully, I don't think Nighteye actually gets enough hate and criticism, and maybe that is due to the lack of screentime he gets within the story of MHA and how the narrative doesn't actually ever call nighteye out for his actions.

I believe that due to the narrative not actually calling out sir nighteye for his actions, most people forget just how much of a jerk he really is and overall nighteyes character goes to waste.

Rereading the overhaul arc and looking over sir Nighteye's character profile really caught my attention, especially with the way that Horikoshi chose to describe Nighteye as the "Japanese counterpart to an Americanised All might."

To me, it looked like horikoshi could have used both all Might and sir nighteyes characters to actively critique the core principles of hero society. Yes, they both try to do good, but we can actively see how much damage they have caused.

For example, both all Might and Sir nighteye perpetuate a toxic work environment where we see them overwork themselves and others to an unhealthy degree.

They are also both contrasts. All Might is shown to do the physical work. He is a symbol of strength and freedom, while nighteye is a symbol of dedication and laughter due to his love for jokes. They both have a personality surrounded by the idea of smiling all Might, smiling physically to comfort people, and sir, nighteye enjoying jokes that his workers and he makes.

Nighteye's work ethic is shown to be more cooperate toxic based, whereas all Might's is more physical toxic based.

Sure, they both had noble intentions at the start, but they also both caused a lot of damage to those around them and to themselves. Sir Nighteye's failures as a hero caused an entire fiasco when it came to Eri and the yakuza while All Might’s own failures as a hero caused for AFO to still be alive and for him to almost die.

They both have their own protégé whom they entrust their legacy to in hopes for a better future. Funnily enough, their protégé also resemble one another, and mirio resembles all Might while izuku resembles sir nighteye.

They're essentially two sides of the same coin when it comes to hero society of MHA and the series should of explored their clashing ideologies a lot more whether that be through both of them or through their own protégé mirio and izuku who ironically end up having two contrastingly different views when it comes to what action should of been taken to helping rescue Eri.

All might in the spotlight while Sir nighteye is in the shadow they are essentially the two halves that make up the hero side of hero society

As I mentioned before, sir, nighteye's toxic work ethic and environment that he facilitates in his agency should have been explored and should have been tied into the failures of the overhaul arc.

It seems that in a very disingenuous and cheap way to create a lighthearted and productive environment, Sir Nighteye goes to huge levels of extreme to create comedy and we see it as he literally has a torture type device called tickle hell that he uses to punish his workers if they aren't funny enough. This is the same mindset that a very toxic manager would have.

Sir Nighteye's work ethic also ends up being heavily problematic with him greenlighting a lot of things like children going to a professional yakuza raid or his poor communication skills when it comes to getting information across to everyone about the raid and assuming that because of his quirk he knows best so he has that superiority complex which causes him to talk down to people whether that be intentionally or not.

However, the series could have also explored the tragedy behind Sir Nighteye's quirk. The tragedy in having the power of knowing what will happen but not having the power to prevent it or not having the power to change the course of events.

I assume that, sir, nighteye some time in the past must of tested the limits to his quirk probably when he was a hero and it had a tragic outcome which would explain the reason why he seems to believe that the future cannot change and that what happens will happen. Something must of happend for nighteye someone with so much information to fall into a depressing doom of inevitability and for him to beg all Might to quit to at least look after himself to stop running to his own death.

In the end, it seems that all might and nighteye switch positions to an extent with sir nighteye dying and all might living. In the end, all of that information couldn't save nighteye at all, and in the end, nighteye died due to a chain of mistakes all of them could be linked back to the slow corruption of hero society.

[fangsandfeels]

Shathann deserved better

Among my many jabs at writing, I feel that it did Shathann dirty.

The concept itself is fascinating: a woman from a society that doesn't have such thing as "family", who became a mother. Who chose to be a mother. She a scholar. She never meant to be a parent. She is nostalgic, but she chose to leave her home and become an apostate in her kin's eyes - out of love for the child she meant to surrender to caretakers.

She is used to calm, analytical thinking, but she made a very emotional decision and took an uncalculated risk.

She doesn't know how to mother, she sticks to the routines she knows even after finding herself outside her society.

And she loves her child, but she doesn't know how to show it.

She is clueless but she is trying. She wants Taash to like her, but she also wants to make sure that Taash never gives in to impulses and can put emotions behind them when necessary.

I don't say that Taash shouldn't have had a conflict with her, but it should have been centered around Taash being an adaari. Because not only did Shathann abandon the Qun for an entirely "selfish" reason - keeping a child to herself instead of letting the Tamassran take care of them and find their place in the Qun, but she also absconded with a dangerous thing, the one with dragon blood in their veins. The one that Qun would have wanted either contained, leashed, and serving or destroyed. For the greater good. We saw what Viddasala did to a dragon in the Trespasser - we can only imagine how Ben-Hassrath and the military forces of Par Vollen would have weaponized the adaari. It certainly wouldn't have been pretty.

It should have been about Taash wondering sometimes if their own mother is afraid of them or regrets having them because she had to leave her home and life behind.

It should have been about Shathann being torn between simply loving her child and trusting them and feeling responsible for whatever will happen if she doesn't teach Taash control, if she doesn't show them the way, if it turns out that her emotions blinded her and she doomed her child from the very beginning.

It should have been about Taash feeling guilty for enjoying themselves when they let the fire burn, when they don't have to hide their heritage as they fight, live, and love - and not knowing whether they should be mad at Shathann for putting that shame into them, do their best to prove her wrong that they're not a mindless beast to be put down or to give up and prove all her fears, just because they can never be what she wants them to be.

It should have been about Taash wondering whether Shathann even loves them or just sees them as some kind of an experiment, to prove a point.

It should have been about Taash's confusion overlapping with Shathann's own repressed trauma of having to leave her life and put everything behind, dive into the unknown - out of love.

This could have been such a fascinating story to explore - the story of a Qunari woman undergoing the trial of parenting, the lore additions about the Kossith and their draconic heritage, the scholarly discussions Shathann could have had with Rook.

There are so many identity issues and questions that we could have dug into, but it all boils down to Taash throwing a tantrum even though Shathann isn't even angry or unaccepting of their gender.

She is inquisitive, trying to understand and obviously worried that she might have made Taash feel inadequate about their biological sex, that her comments about Taash's manners or way of dressing hurt Taash and she didn't even know. This is not offensive, it's a normal reaction. Shathann is an inexperienced parent and she knows it, but she cares a lot about Taash and beneath all of her polite and strict attitude, she is terrified of hurting Taash.

Moreover, as soon as Shathann sees that Taash is obviously distraught, she removes herself to give Taash some room and not to add to their discomfort. She is upset herself, but she prioritizes Taash's wellbeing over her own feelings.

And then later Shathann just symbolically dies to redeem herself for the crime of...trying to have a dialogue with Taash and check in with their feelings.

A dialogue about the matter she already accepted, just wanted to make sure that Taash's identity doesn't stem from self-hatred.

Yes, Taash's final quest was supposed to show just that: that all that time Shathann was trying to protect Taash and that she always accepted Taash and that all that time Taash loved their mom, but instead of being painful in a good way, it was just painful.

Because Shathann's death and final words were clearly showing "see, she accepted Taash in the end and died to atone for her sins, hooozah" - and nothing more. The writers didn't exploit Shathann feeling homesick and having her doubts - for instance, if she gets contacted by the Ben-Hassrath (yes, I still think that it should have been Qunari invasion, not the Antaam going rogue and playing warlords) and offered to surrender Taash voluntarily in exchange for being allowed back (under strict supervision and with a permanent ban on reproducing, but still), but she refuses because no matter how out-of-place she feels, she would always choose Taash. Always.

I feel genuinely sorry for her and the potential she and Taash had as characters. They both could have been so much more and they both didn't deserve this (like many other characters in Veilguard, to be honest).