#I don’t have none of this shit but please man it’s called decent human respect Jesus people suck ASS sometimes | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

m4gp13 · 4 years ago

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For those of you who made it through my laughably incoherent ethabaster think piece, here’s some hc’s, you’ve earned them:

- Ethan has sole possession of their one shared brain cell. Alabaster is not allowed to even look at it. This is because they used to have two but Al broke the good one trying to blow up something (probably Percy).

- If Al finds out Ethan left without some form of magical protection i.e. a sigil, a crystal, ground eggshells, he will be pretty much vibrating with nerves until Ethan gets back so he can give him a once-over.

- Alabaster’s from a very witchy family who all worship Hecate for many reasons that differ depending on which estranged relative you ask and they all kinda saw Al as the first coming of witch Christ so he had a lot of expectations at a very young age.

- Ethan knows this and tries to lift as much Titan army business off his shoulders as possible.

- He accidentally lifts too much off to the point where he is drowning in work and is now the one in need of saving. But does he tell anyone that if he looks at one more stack of demands from his mile long list of bosses he’s going to cry for five hours? Of course not don’t be ridiculous.

- Alabaster immediately hated Percy as soon as he heard the guys name but due to the arena stuff and telling Thalia not to k*ll him Ethan actually held a bit of respect for Percy which annoyed Al to no end.

-This was until the not-so-peaceful peace talk in tlo when Percy starts shit talking Nemesis and Ethan just internally goes “actually the witch bitch was right this guy sucks ass”

-However, under no circumstances will Ethan ever tell this to Alabaster; not because he values his pride (he has none) but because he knows the life of a demigod is short and he doesn’t want to spend the rest of his very short one hearing Al rub that one thing in his face for every single second of it.

- And I mean Every. Single. Second.

- So yeah he takes that to the grave and doesn’t even tell anyone in the underworld in case they tell Al when he dies and he doesn’t want to spend the rest of his afterlife with Al being a dumbass. (also yes Ethan got into Elysium, fuck you)

- (Actually I have another idea about where Ethan went post-life but that’s so far from canon it’s more of an AU than a headcanon so we’re gonna leave that out for now)

- Al thought he was the one in charge of the Hecate kids because he was the most powerful and the highest ranking in the army but he was Not. That was Ethan. The Hecate kids thought Ethan was their unofficial adopted baby brother but little did they know he was the mum the whole time.

- Ethan is the only thing standing between them and starving to death. He also does the younger kids hair and gives everyone with long hair super intricate braids that stay out of their faces during “field work”. Al thinks this is more of him trying to take the weight off his shoulders but Ethan knows that if he doesn’t do this shit no one will so he kinda has to. Not that he doesn’t like doing it. being helpful is his love language.

- Because of their powers over the mist the Hecate kids of the army were notorious pranksters who were usually at war with the Hermes kids (wars usually declared by Al because he rolled a zero on self restraint) but none of them prank Ethan because “nooooo you can’t do him he babey 🥺”

- Ethan has simply decided that what the magic prank wizards don’t know can’t hurt them and just turns to his blind side whenever he sees them sneaking off the ship to get Micky D’s in the middle of the night to stay on their good sides.

- Speaking of the ship, Ethan thinks it’s the dumbest thing in the world that one of their most powerful demigod enemies is the son of a sea god and he actually has a pretty decent relationship with said sea god and their main base of operations aside from mt Othrys is a fucking BOAT. He tells Al all about his worries for the ship and while Al assures him that nothing that bad could happen he always makes sure that the ship always has the least amount of demigods on board at all times just in case.

- It takes all the strength Ethan has not to yell “TOLD YOU SO” at him when the ship blows up.

- Al probably either wears basic white boy clothes or typical witchy stuff (like moons and shit) depending his mood meanwhile Ethan found out about leather and just goes for it.

- Every grunge/punk/emo/eboy/teachwear bitch aspires to be him and because he aint about all that “gender roles” bs he definitely goes about wearing cool egirl stuff too. Not just slightly feminine shaped jumpers but all the plaid skirts, fishnets and lace trimmed dresses he can steal afford and Al, despite his more basic fashion taste is here for it. You’ve never seen someone more supportive of their pals fits, get you a hypeman like Al. You deserve it. (Ethan is also not afraid to walk around in a full pastel gamer girl fit)

- (Also Al hyping up one Ethans fits in front of a Titan is the reason they were allowed to start wearing army fatigues instead of the whole ancient Greek armour on occasion)

- Ethan appreciates Al’s enthusiasm but he also kinda doesn’t get it. And he definitely doesn't do that “yeah you’re right I DO look good” thing because he just doesn’t know how. He’d always been a little self-conscious about getting a big head but then he found out about Nemesis and hubris and all that fun stuff, looked at his meager pile of self worth and said “ yep, this has to go”

- Al almost starts crying when he finds out and pretty much makes it mission to be such a good hype man that Ethan has no choice but to think of himself as a Pretty Cool Dude via absorbing the hype through diffusion. It kinda starts working but then Ethan [REDACTED] in tlo so we’ll never know what could’ve been.

- To nick a hc from someone ( hi @chromarozee-spam) contrary to his taste in clothes Ethan does ballet (he was a punk AND did ballet, what more can I say?) and while Al tries to support his hobbies he is genuinely afraid both for and of him. “For” because “holy fuck that looks painful are you okay?”. And “of” because “are you sure those are bones inside you because I don’t think bones are supposed do that?!”.

- Ethan tries to assure him that no his spine is not made of rubber, broken bones or otherworldly materials so can he stop bothering him during practice please?

- This does not stop Al from making a million protection wards and constantly asking his deck if Ethan is indeed a Being of this Good Green Earth.

- Eventually his cards pretty much just tell him that he is friends with one bendy heck of a boi and he needs to fucking get over it so he kinda just,, ,,,,, , does.

- Again with the hc thieving (this time from @altorringtons) Al learning to use a two-handed broadsword so he can guard Ethan’s blind side and back in a fight *soft noises* just them trying so hard to keep each other alive because they love each other and they care about each other!

- They also sleep in the same bed whenever they get the chance (fully clothed ya nasties, they’re kids) and they just hug each other soooo tight because they just need to know they’re alright cos they always get pretty banged up in fights against campers or just monsters that are too much like wild animals to recruit. (What? Me? Projecting my desire to be intimately held by the closest person I have to family with their arms wrapped not tight enough to make me uncomfortable but tight enough to make me feel loved? Never! What on earth are you talking about?)

- Because Al is super stubborn and prideful whenever they have an argument Al can’t really bring himself to say he’s sorry so when he’s ready to apologise he just climbs into bed on Ethan’s blind side and cuddles him because he knows Ethan is super worried about getting attacked on his blind side so it’s like he has a guard or a shield.

- Ethan on the other hand just calls him a Rock Boy in a derogatory way until he gets over himself and apologizes but he really does love the fact that Al knows that about him and accommodates that.

- The thing they fight about most is how “heroic” the titan army is. Kronos’ brainwashing worked on Al like a charm and he fully believes that they are the rebellion and camp is the empire. Ethan on the other hand wasn’t at camp long enough for Kronos or Luke to really do anything but it doesn’t matter because Ethan really doesn’t give a shit if he’s on the “evil side” cos he just wants respect and he’s willing to do what it takes without a second thought of how people see him. If he thinks he’s doing the right thing but on the wrong side he can live with that but Al needs to feel like all of his side is on the moral high ground because that’s what Kronos drilled into his brain.

- Ethan knows that Al delusional when it comes to the non-existent heroics of the army but eventually he just decides to let Al believe the titans lies because that’s easier for him even if it hurts Ethan to see him being manipulated like that.

- Due to Ethan not giving a shit on the humanity of his bosses he gets punished a lot more often and a lot more violently than Al because they know that Ethan already knows they don’t care about him so they don’t have to sugar coat him but Al still believes that they’re heroes and his mindset needs to stay like that to keep him obedient.

- Also because I am a Cruel Person By Nature I hc Ethan’s mortal family (which usually just consists of his dad) as meeting a not very pg13 end at the hands of a monster who wanted to nible on Ethan a tad which pretty much scarred him for life.

- SO, at the end of the battle of Man Hats Are In when Al looks around and sees that his whole family (that joined the titans) are dead! oh no! How sad! At least he knows someone whose been through the same thing so they understand each other and can help each other through this tough time together right? SIKE!

- so yeah Al learns Ethan d-worded in the worst possible way at the worst possible time and just looses it from grief. Loosing his family was bad enough but finding out he lost the one person he thought he would be able to confide in and heal with immediately after just really rubs salt in the wound.

- When the survivors start re-grouping to find someplace to hide until the gods forget about them Al just wanders off because it’s all he can do to not break down on the spot.

- He’s just wandering in a daze for a while and most people just assume he’s high but he snaps out of it and gets into anger mode when Lamia starts attacking him because he finally has something to do and occupy himself with even though it’s hard not to think about his sibling especially when Lamia keeps talking like they never would have died if she’d been in charge which is why she should totally just kill him and lead their siblings instead.

- His desire to have something to keep his mind off his family and Ethan is the first thing he thinks about when Claymore re-alives and immediately starts talking about doing research (yeah because that’s what you need after a long stressful day of fighting monsters and literally dying).

- Ethan keeps trying to cross the veil and help, even if he just sends Al a pleasant dream to help him sleep but contrary to what you might think from the name, the veil is really hard to cross so Ethan just has to bite his nails and watch his friend suffer.

- It gets easier to watch after Al and Claymore pretty much adopt each other because at least he has someone but they do still get into pretty scary situations.

- When they were both premortem they got paired up for a lot of missions for the titan army and they usually just tried to pretend they were on a fun road trip around America when they could and make fun of mortal shit together.

- At one point they were in a motel and the last people accidentally left behind one of Claymore’s books about death and they found it the funniest thing ever. Between a pair of in which one of their mum’s regularly goes to the underworld and one has been there himself they find mortal ideas of the afterlife to be very amusing.

- Alabaster has decided he would not like to share this with the class (Claymore) thank you very much.

- Also when they’re doing their road tripping Ethan knows all the best places to crash, the cheapest food places and the local gangs don’t bother them because between running away from camp and joining the army he just wandered around a lot.

- Like he’d just hop on a random train, take a nap and figure it out when he wakes up; he made a lot of friends this way too as well as his taste in clothes cos he didn’t have a lot of money so he’d just DIY some second hand punk shit. Al thinks he’s the Gandalf of the demigod world because he just knows everyone who might help them and everywhere they could spend the night. He definitely tells his siblings about Ethan being the closest thing they have to a wandering wizard and they fucking love it.

- Also because Nemesis tends to not have a lot of kids Ethan was the only one of hers in the army and Al felt really bad for him because his sibling were his favourite part about the army so he tried to include Ethan in as much as possible with his siblings.

- As an unexpected result Ethan ended up with a small army of super powered children to sick on the people who keep making jabs about him loosing in the arena battle.

- Al sometimes thinks he’s given him too much power but also he will fuck a bitch up if they make fun of his pals so he sees where his siblings are coming from and yeah those bitches had it coming. He also has a copy of bitchcraft.

- Ethan’s dad was the type to play “Stay With Me” by Miki Matsubara on repeat for hours and Ethan would probably enjoy the song but he’s heard it so often that now it makes his ears bleed and Al sometimes tortures him with for fun until Ethan starts throwing shit.

- To steal another hc from @chromarozee-spam Ethan has a thing for cats and one time Al accidentally gave himself mistform cat-ears and Ethan could not stop touching them. Ethan was just craning his head back uncontrollably grinning so much his face hurt. Al can’t bring himself to be upset because Ethan rarely ever smiles since he joined the army.

- Al saw Ethan crying over one of those video’s where people put their hoodies on backwards and put their cat in the hood so he made a mist cat and bought him a hoodie. Ethan of course started crying again but it was happy tears instead.

- Ethan is fucking tiny while Al is almost a foot taller than him. He wouldn’t mind so much if Al didn’t exhaust every opportunity to rub it in his face so he just starts climbing all over shit (especially tall buildings) half to give Al heart attacks and half so he can be like “Sorry? What was that? I’m so high up I can’t hear you. Can you speak up a little? Maybe get a ladder? Or taller?”

- Also I don’t know why but I hc Al as Texan. Ethan gets told about this “Alabaster C. Torrington” guy who knows latin, incantations and other magical knowledge and expects some fancy British guy so when they meet and Al speaks Ethan gets whiplash so hard he fuckin chokes.

- Al is also very casual and Ethan is pretty professional so when he meets this magic general with a straight back and the first thing that comes out of this assholes mouth is some “Howdy y’all!!” bullshit he just dies on the spot.

- Also because Al is texan he is very sensitive to the cold (I’m about 80% sure that Texas is one of the Warm states) so when he has to do stuff in cold places like the labyrinth or new york (idk about that one to but in every film I’ve seen that’s set in NY it’s raining for about 90% of the time) he complains about being freezing all the time until Ethan helpfully reminds him that he can literally make fire out of nothing, surely he can find a way to warm himself up.

- Ethan is also sensitive to the cold because he’s basically malnourished but he’s been like that for a while and thinks it’s normal so he sucks it up until Al notices he’s always cold. Ethan tells him it’s fine but Al is basically a walking electric blanket so whenever Al cuddles him to keep him warm Ethan can’t help but melt because he’s so fucking warm and soft and have you noticed I crave intimacy?

- Ethan started studying Greek myths vigorously since he found out he was a demigod and when he died he kept an eye and an ear out for Al because even though he wouldn’t be able to do anything it still reassures him to know what’s going on, HOWEVER, he was almost filled with enough malice to rip through the barrier between the living and the dead purely to beat an ass when he hears Al’s little “I don’t bother reading about worthless monsters like you!” jab.

- Ethan is very jumpy and fidgety to the point where Al is genuinely concerned and while Ethan assures Al that nothing’s wrong Al is still suspicious. Ethan probably would have told Al about it if it was because of anything but Kronos but seeing that it mostly is, he doesn’t because Ethan feels like Al will just take Kronos’ word over his and he’ll loose the only person he trusts in the army.

- Al doesn’t find out about it until way after the war when Kronos’ brainwashing starts to come undone because by then his mindset is a lot less biased in the titans favour so he can see things that he just unconsciously ignored before and is able to put two and two together. When he does boy is it a trip.

- Ethan is really bad at talking about feelings and stuff so whenever Al gets upset over something and Ethan has no idea how to talk to him he’ll just get him some rocks. One time Ethan found out about those heart shaped valentine boxes that are normally filled with chocolates but people put crystals in them and that just became his go-to for when Al was especially upset.

- Al is only slightly better at talking about stuff but he can still get Ethan to open up to him which is good because Ethan isn’t very materialistic so it’s hard to make him feel better by buying him things and because someone needs to get Ethan to express himself in an emotionally healthy way.

- Also because of this they just can’t tell each other they love each other. Like they’ll barely whisper it when the other is asleep because they’re just so bad at talking about feelings. It wasn’t that much of an issue until after the war and Ethan gets k-worded and Al is left alone and sobbing over all the times he never told his loved ones how much they meant to him.

- But because this is a headcanon list; fuck that, Al saved Ethan with some sort of magic bullshit and they talk about how much they love each other all the time now because they can’t stand the thought of one of them dying having never been told how much they are loved.

#me going around nicking hcs: thank you for your sacrifices #this will help tremendously in the war effort #also max i am extremely pleased to tell you that auto correct thinks Harrington is a lovely name for you #and you stan the magic messiah #autocorrect didn't say that one #but it's true #pjo #percy jackson #ethan nakamura #alabaster torrington #alabaster c torrington #ethan x alabaster #ethabaster

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satanherfuckingself · 4 years ago

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Hayley Atwell. Publicly Adored Psychopath.

Before I begin, I feel it's imperative to mention that this was not created to cause harm. Do not send anyone hatred or harassment despite what you may read. You are not a monster. Do not stoop to that level. Verbal abuse is still abuse, whether we acknowledge it or not, whether someone 'deserves' it or not.

Please, do not do that. Do not become an abuser. If you feel the need to do something, I will provide solutions for that fact, but hatred and harm will not solve anything.

Keep that in mind. And please stay tuned and read this thoroughly because it's more than just a social call out. It's more than just 'cancel culture' or someone making a big whoop over something nonsensical or even holding someone accountable for their actions. I promise there is a point to this, and it is probably far more important than the title even suggests.

Please, stick with it, and read to the end.

I also feel the need to mention that some of the behaviors discussed in this piece will undoubtedly be quite... disturbing. Proceed with caution if you find it necessary.

And. Let it be known that any claims made here are in fact alleged. Evidence and sources will be provided of course, that's simply a friendly reminder for the... legality of it.

Forgive me if you enjoy this ending because if you have any sense of a decent moral compass, this will probably shatter that enjoyment of it, and forgive me if you do not because this will only make you hate it more.

So I found this blog:

Hydra Support Blog

Really, it's a blog centered entirely around hating Sharon Carter, the very real person that was her actress, Emily VanCamp, encouraging hatred towards this same very real person and her fans for any scrounged up nonexistent reason they can find, without proof, as well as fans of the comics.

They also insult her acting, despite the fact that Emily actually has won awards for her performances while the idol they are so devoted to has not.

All for the sake of the very real bully who actively encouraged, manipulated, and even to some degree, promoted the behavior. Under the guise of promoting her own character.

Why did I call them a Hydra support blog?

Well, quite clearly, they support the Creepy Uncle Theory that Endgame made a point to reward them with, which certainly does require the support of Hydra among other things, but I won't dive into that just yet. It's also because they sound exactly like Zola. Don't worry, we'll come back to it. But they are also quite clearly overjoyed at the idea of someone losing a job for their personal enjoyment.

This is also terrible.

Allow me to remind that this harassment and hatred was not limited to these fans, or fans of Peggy or Steggy. It also existed, to some degree among Romanogers fans, Stucky fans, and Stony fans. You know who you are. And you are certainly not excused from this behavior if you in any way participated in spreading hatred or contempt for the Staron and Sharon fanbase, or actively harassing those fans.

You don't have to like it, you can even rant against it all you like in your personal spaces. But being respectful and understanding should be the common fucking courteousy here. People are allowed to like different things from you. And they are not obligated to agree with you.

Your personal enjoyment is not worth more than someone's job or life. And it never should be.

However, the only actress who encouraged this particular behavior in full, among her fans... was Atwell.

Not Emily, not Chris, not Scarlett, not Sebastian, and not Robert Downey Jr. Some may have made tasteless jokes or even gone along with the situation, encouraging 'teams' among fans for publicity. I wouldn't label complete blamelessness in this case, but it is important to recognize ignorance over malicious behavior, which is the difference here. Because it was nothing to the extent of the tantrum that Atwell threw the moment the spotlight was no longer on her.

So let's talk about Hayley Atwell, and her involvement in all of this, the alleged actions and their implications. Let's take a deep dive into the psychology of it all, and why what she did was actually very wrong. I'll touch on the lack of etiquette and class as well as blatant unprofessionalism needed to consciously do what she did.

Because her behavior is disturbing, it is disgusting, and it has gone unnoticed for far too long. Her portrayal of Peggy makes the relationship canonically abusive. And no one noticed.

People are still defending her, and respecting her, despite what she's done. She is welcome to have a life and live it how she pleases, but not at the expense of other people. We cannot simply reward this type of behavior when it is unquestionably wrong. We cannot leave her with the power to do worse.

A good starting point in understanding what she's done would be here:

Receipts

Who one lovely sweetheart of a blogger decided to compile and I am ever so grateful for, as I'm a lazy shit~. My only regret is that this wasn't seen and still hasn't been seen by enough people, especially by those that rewarded or are even promoting the behavior still. This blogger is a very good person and that is abundantly clear, send her some love and reblog that post if you can. It's necessary more people see it. Thank you, love, you are truly a blessing. So I'm a little bias, I tend to be for good people.

Allow me to expand on it though, as I do have to mention, I have just a few minor additions and concerns. However, sources are provided perfectly, along with plenty of evidence to stand on it's own for what Atwell did. That this was active, deliberate, and intentional to hurt someone's career that wasn't herself. Allegedly.

But, let's also debunk some of Atwell's claims and mention a few other things, starting with all her claims about the relationship between Sharon and Steve. Between being 'disrespectful' and 'incestuous'.

Claims easily found in these articles:

https://ew.com/article/2016/06/06/captain-america-civil-war-hayley-atwell-steve-sharon/

https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/heat-vision/peggy-carter-does-not-approve-899860

https://www.hypable.com/captain-america-civil-war-hayley-atwell-steve-and-sharon-were-disrespectful/

https://www.thewrap.com/hayley-atwell-agent-carter-captain-america-civil-war-kiss-sharon-carter-marvel-incestuous-disrespectful/

https://www.cinemablend.com/new/Hayley-Atwell-Issue-With-Captain-America-Agent-13-Kiss-Civil-War-135197.html

https://www.bustle.com/articles/165038-hayley-atwell-reveals-peggys-feelings-about-steve-sharon-which-are-just-what-youd-expect

https://www.bustle.com/articles/165194-why-captain-america-sharon-carters-relationship-does-a-disservice-to-both-fans-steve-rogers

https://www.themarysue.com/peggy-carter-does-not-approve/

Oh, and look at that last one, including a gif of the psychotic rage it takes to shoot at someone who doesn't belong to you, because you're jealous... And of course, we love a good afterthought in which a real person is less important than a fictional story.

https://screenrant.com/captain-america-mcu-ending-problem-sharon-carter-endgame/

Did I need to include all of those sources? Of course not. Are they mostly along the same lines? Absolutely. But does it make a point of how positively this was covered as the media ran with her words to give her as much press and coverage as she wanted and promote her and only her ideas?

Absolutely...

To put it all very bluntly, I disagree with her. Why?

Well, for starters, we know that 'Peggy' had initially moved on from Steve. She'd married, had a family, supposedly loved this family and even had grandchildren. The character had always, comics alike but even in the MCU, been meant to signify and aid in Steve moving on, just as she did, from the past. It was a minor role, but still vital, and quite endearing when done this way.

But according to this, these articles and Atwell herself.

Peggy never loved the husband she'd initially married, or the family she'd made.

They were only placeholders for Steve.

According to her, Steve wasn't allowed to move on from her. Wasn't permitted to find happiness, beyond her, even though her character had blatantly stated she wanted him to in 'CA:TWS'. As proven even by Atwell's feelings towards Romanogers. Seemingly any woman that wasn't Peggy was an absolute 'no' for her. Because he belonged to 'Peggy'. I didn't know... slavery was a thing for her, but as far as I know, people cannot and should not be ownable.

Under no circumstances, even with married couples, should the people involved be considered property. They are individuals and human beings. Point blank. Period.

But let's make an exception in her case and say that this is true. Well, apparently this controlled permission and ownership extends to Sharon as well?

Now I'll ask, why is Peggy's opinion, a woman Steve had previously only shared one kiss with, had never even managed to share that one date with, relevant at all?

A woman who, need I remind you is well into her 90s by the time we see her again, is Steve still supposedly all she thinks about? All she thought about all those years? Why was a picture of... him on her desk in the 70s, as portrayed in Endgame, when she should have been married, with children, well into her 50s mind you but somehow still young, and apparently, none of her family is as important as Steve?

How is that healthy?

She was tantamount to an ex-lover at that point. Even if they had slept together, as Atwell claimed, and Evans and the writers disproved. Are people supposed to consult ex-lovers before they start dating someone else? Especially ones that get married and live their lives? Is there some unspoken rule I don't know about? Or in another sense, I wasn't aware she was also his mother and could decide for him, a grown man with a right to his own decisions and autonomy, who had initiated the romance with Sharon, what he could and could not do.

Ideally, Peggy would have cared more about Sharon, a niece she had supported in her endeavors and helped raise, rather than a man she admired symbolically and had shared one kiss with, and never managed to date. Just because she didn't get dick from him. Ideally, she would have cared more about the family she'd allegedly made after moving on from this man's death. A family, Sharon would have been a part of.

Her concerns shouldn't have been cockblocking Steve and saying he couldn't have Sharon and vice versa, they should have been whether or not he's treating Sharon right. And far more protective over Sharon, than possessive over Steve.

In fact, a good great aunt who'd truly loved both of them, faced with this situation, I would have even imagined trying to set them up, and being that scandalous older woman~, who's lived her life, had fun, loved her family, and wants to see him happy with someone else.

Because that's what true love is.

Wanting to see the person you love, happy, even if it's without you, even if it can't be you that gives them that happiness, especially if you've had to move on in your own life and can't be with them.

I fail to see how Steve moving on after she has too, qualifies as 'disrespectful'. Even if you find it tasteless that he kissed Sharon after her death. Could he have asked for her permission and blessing for the relationship? Of course! Maybe he should have, I think this would have even made it better. The difference being, a Peggy who truly cared about him would have given her blessing, not withheld it.

But what about the 'incestuous' aspect?

Well, that's also a no. At least... not technically, and certainly not before Peggy was forced back into the relationship, before Steve willingly and knowing became Sharon's uncle. And Peggy's placeholders were set aside like chopped liver. Steve was certainly in a peculiar situation that maybe doesn't look the best from the exterior, and in the original version of the comics, Sharon was merely Peggy's younger sister. However, the comparison of his situation is easily explained and understood in much better lighting with some simple imagination.

Take for example, and let's even make Sharon a more direct descendant just to drive the point home, if Steve were an ancient vampire.

Let's say... this vampire Steve has a brief romantic fling with a young and beautiful Peggy. They do not sleep together. But share some feelings, some sweet passings, and a single kiss. However, Steve goes dormant, for years and years and years on end. However vampires do. Peggy is understandably sad for the moment, perhaps upset. But she moves on. She understands, she falls in love with someone new, she has children, and her children have children, and so on and so forth. She lives a normal human life.

Steve wakes up.

And he meets Sharon. A however many greats granddaughter of the woman he was once infatuated with. But he may not necessarily know this. They look nothing alike. But maybe there's something special in the bloodline that draws them together, that draws him to her.

Oh, and by the way, this is starting to sound familiar. Ever heard of the 'Vampire Diaries'? Except Elena and Katherine do in fact look exactly alike.

Yet no one bats an eye at this or calls it incestuous.

The point being, he falls in love. And she does too. And maybe this time, he decides he wants someone to be with, to hold, wholly and completely. And he turns Sharon into his immortal lover. (There's a fic idea for anyone that wants it~!)

Perhaps this was even something that under circumstance, he couldn't offer to Peggy, or she had even rejected.

This is not incest, in any way, shape, or form. This is a man, faced with a circumstance, in which he moves on. And is happy to do so. There is nothing wrong with that.

Could it be a little strange that he happens to fall for someone in Peggy's bloodline? Sure. But it's still not incest.

Unless~, he falls in love with Sharon... before deciding on takebacksies and finding a way to go back in time just to be with her however many greats grandmother. Possibly even ensuring that his own blood is part of Sharon's, or erasing her from existence along with any of the other family that Peggy had allegedly loved.

The first one is perfectly understandable. The second one is disgusting.

Peggy makes it incestuous.

But I suppose, according to Atwell, Peggy was also incapable of love.

Not just loving other people besides Steve, but love in general. Because this is called obsession, and it's sick. It's disturbing. Can't tell the difference? Here, that should help. This one too, very informative and does a good job of simplifying this concept for the average person. And what a coincidence. Oh, and look, another. And another.

Seriously, this is what Marvel, and Disney, a modern day company that should be responsible with it's messages and stories, glorified and normalized for the public.

If you're going to write a horror story, at least say it's a fucking horror story. Or take the goddamn criticism when someone tells you it is objectively bad.

So, not only did this woman completely fabricate and romanticize a crush, an unhealthy one, and blow it up to be a real relationship along with convincing everyone of the lie, she put others down to do so in order to get what she wanted, regardless of the price that others had to pay for it. Lovely. I think her claims completely undermine and disregard the legacy Peggy had left behind, and the love she would have otherwise had for her family. I think it's a gross mischaracterization of her that misses the mark on who 'Peggy Carter' was and what she represents.

Did you know that in the comics she has a relationship with Gabe Jones? One of Steve's own Howlies no less, and a wonderful representation of an interracial love fighting for what's right, together, especially for the time period?

Where's that love story, that doesn't require Steve to be a creepy uncle for her sake and is more than just an obsessive crush and single kiss?

Why does Sharon not matter to her? Why did her husband not matter? Why did her kids not matter?

And if you're under the assumption that Steve was this person the entire time, why did Hydra not matter growing within S.H.I.E.L.D.? Why did Steve's own principles and who he was not matter to her anymore, as long as she was getting dick? Why did Bucky not matter, being tortured by Hydra for the 70 years she got to get off?

Nevermind, I guess she treated him like shit anyway, even if ideally, the flirtatious little shit Bucky was would have been the best man at Steve's wedding to her, an uncle to her kids, and the best friend that Steve had in his life with her.

Why did Sharon still not matter to her? Nor her other family which she apparently lied to? Why did young Steve not matter enough to tell the truth to? And lie about Alzheimer's no less. Why did she seem to find it fitting to lie to everyone?

Let's continue.

If that's not enough, let's talk about the cry that Steve somehow 'wasn't good enough' for or 'didn't deserve' Peggy when the kiss of Civil War happened.

Okay...

How?

Because if your reasoning for the logic of putting someone down, telling them they are lesser, and 'not good enough' or undeserving of you, is because they choose to 'move on' and not be with you, or choose someone else over you?

You are a terrible person. And I would not want to be the object of your affection.

That is deliberate psychological abuse. And if you tell anyone that sort of thing, just because they don't or can't return your feelings, you are a fucked up person. Fuck you. That is disgusting.

Do not ever tell someone this just because they can't or choose not to love you. Apologize if you ever have, especially to someone you do love. Love is not always an active choice. And this is guilt tripping, manipulating, gaslighting someone into a situation where you put them down for your personal benefit, and that is nasty, unacceptable behavior that no one should tolerate.

Call out someone's own terrible behavior if they are doing something wrong, do not jump to the conclusion that this means the person is worthless. There is a difference. Harmful behaviors can be changed. People can change and get better. We should strive to be better.

However, the aforementioned? That is what psychopaths do to ensure their control over a relationship, run if someone is doing this to you. Find a way to get out of there if you can, because that is fucked up, and no, you deserve better than that. Do not let them belittle you.

And yet, this was... completely glorified by the media, even rewarding someone who committed to this type of behavior. Especially after the fact.

How many articles are there out there that critique Endgame versus those that promote this ending and actively defend it? Giving Disney good press?

But luckily, Atwell only did it with the characters, right? It's only fictional, right?

Yeah, that's why we didn't see Emily in Infinity Wars or Endgame... That's why, even though she'd been hired for a job she had earned, they kept kicking her down the road like a bent, empty can. Worthless and usable, and not a real person at all. Why did they hire her if this had 'always been the plan' as they claimed? To disgust everyone? To make the ending as fucking shitty as it is and have people praise them for it? To publicly embarrass and humiliate her, just because?

The lack of class and just... human decency necessary to commit this kind of behavior is easily seen with a hypothetical comparison, simply with another well beloved actress I will admit might not be a fully fair comparison. But that's because this actress is amazing and not many people compare to her.

But let's take a pause and also consider the actions of Atwell's coworkers, since none of them did quite what she did. None of them... did quite what she did.

You know who else would never do this, even if she'd been playing Peggy Carter and got her show cancelled? Who realistically, wouldn't have gotten her show cancelled because she actually is amazing and would be worth watching, hands down, no complaints.

Sandra Bullock.

And I'd hate to name drop like that or put her on the spot, but just consider it for a moment. Sandy B. as Peggy Carter. Already, beautiful, elegant, amazing, maybe a bit funnier, compassionate, kind, and playing the part of the loving aunt for Sharon perfectly. Even more comic accurate probably! Sandra Bullock would never take time out of her day for any reason, to put down one of her costar's characters and talk trash about this character and the relationship she's in with another character... Ever. Period.

She has class, grace. And she's a truly, genuinely good human being. In fact, I would wager to say, she'd make jokes about it to promote the relationship. As the crazy aunt who's constantly trying to set Steve up with someone new, probably her niece, and embarrassing the shit out of him. And that image is just fucking adorable.

Can you picture it? It's pretty amazing, right?

Now can you really defend Atwell's actions knowing they could have been avoided and a real person, real people, not hurt with them?

I guarantee this ending would have never happened had someone at least like Sandra Bullock been cast as Peggy Carter. Even if she did happen to 'ship' Peggy and Steve more than she did Sharon and Steve. Even if she did 'joke' about it. Especially when there's a point the jokes go too far. And I'd wager to say, she'd even focus more on helping Emily VanCamp, than putting down her character and sicking her pack or rabid bullies on her to try and get her to kill herself.

What the actual fuck has to be wrong with someone to do something like that. Even without giving the direct order.

And sure, maybe fans do ride the crazy train a bit to much. But the least we could expect from Bullock would be a public statement regarding the behavior, and letting fans know that she doesn't condone it and would want them to stop.

I challenge you to find anything along those lines that Atwell could have done. I tried.

And there was nothing.

Let's continue with the character analysis and talk a bit about the implications of this ending.

So far, we know Peggy hated Sharon, her own niece, that she 'owns' Steve and has all rights to his autonomy and decisions, doesn't care about her husband or family if Steve isn't somehow part of it, and would label Steve 'unworthy' of her if he somehow decided he loved someone else. Not just Sharon, but anyone.

Let's also not forget this is a woman who shot at him for having kissed someone else in front of her. When they weren't together. Would you want and choose to date someone who shot at you for doing that?

I mean, I suppose I don't personally know you, maybe you're into some kinky shit. But that doesn't really seem to healthy to me.

Let's talk about little Steve and Erskine, and the promise Steve made to him as well as himself. His character development over the movies and what this ending requires not just of him, but of Peggy too.

From the first movie, we know that even when Steve wasn't capable of doing more, when his body didn't permit him to, he always wanted to do more. Erskine in his dying moment asked him not to forget his heart. The man that would choose to do good above all else. To help those around him that maybe couldn't help themselves. This is an invaluable lesson I think we could all learn from, within our capacities of course.

Bucky even tried to stop Steve from hurting himself, because he worried about him. And then followed him because he admired what the little guy... had always stood for. And against.

“I don't want to hurt anyone. I don't like bullies, I don't care where they're from.”

By the end of the film, Steve has lost someone incredibly dear to him that he grew up with, Bucky, and makes the decision to save thousands of lives that would otherwise be lost over his own personal enjoyment. Because it's the right decision. And he tells Peggy it's his choice. He doesn't hesitate. He doesn't expect to survive, but he keeps his promise to Erskine above all else, and stops Hydra, or so we think.

We later discover Hydra has survived all those years through Zola. Growing in S.H.I.E.L.D., under Peggy's watchful eyes... holding Bucky for all that time.

With the addition of Endgame's Creepy Uncle Theory, that little tidbit of the story, we've been given two interpretations. There's also a lot of lines that lose all meaning, from Steve, Peggy, and Sharon.

“When I see a situation pointed south, I can't ignore it.”

“Sometimes, all we can do is our best, and sometimes the best is the start over.”

“She kept so many secrets, I didn't want her to have one from you.”

“I don't know, the guy who wanted all of that went into the ice 70 years ago, I think someone else came out.”

But let's go back to those interpretations, both of which require someone to suffer on Steve and Peggy's behalf for a minimum of 70 years. Apart from becoming a creepy uncle who apparently had been only using Sharon as a replacement for her. And of course abandoning everyone who loved him just to get laid. This may not be easily seen or understood at first glance. But it is easily explained and should be painfully obvious.

If Steve is present in the main universe that entire time, choosing to do nothing, he has:

Abandoned Sharon.

Abandoned his family, the Avengers.

Abandoned Bucky.

Abandoned the principles he lived by and thrown away promises to all those he held dear. Including his promise to Erskine, who gave him that power to do more to begin with.

Left Hydra undisturbed and even prospering under his beloved wife's organization, allowing people to die and suffer, including Bucky who we know is tortured and in and out of ice for those years.

Be perfectly happy with the sexism, racism, and just general bigotry of the time period. Something that at least comics Steve Rogers has been proven to hate so much, he actively made himself go forward in time permanently, after only saving Bucky, because he couldn't stand it. No amount of Peggy to fix the situation for him. She's also never mattered as much as any other love interest to him. Not even Blind Al, that one's obscure~.

Be perfectly happy to do nothing while a situation is pointed south, even though he has previously stated incapable of doing so? While he knows what will happen or that people are suffering and dying for him and Peggy, what he will do to Sharon, and just completely and utterly not giving a shit.

Huh... Well, none of that sounds 'good'. I guess it also means he completely regrets his decision to save all those lives and sacrifice himself. A decision... I assumed he was the type of person to be able to make more than once if necessary. Because it was who he was. And supposedly, what Peggy even respected him for. I assumed Peggy would have also respected this decision, not backtracked to make him actively do the opposite of this very thing for 70 years. Possibly even... if we're to believe Hydra is allowed to run rampant all those years, potentially thousands of lives to be killed on his behalf instead.

Huh, I guess it was a pointless decision.

“We don't trade lives.”

Right?

And we're supposed to believe Mjolnir, a tool essentially measuring 'selflessness' and humility, purity of heart, 'worthiness', would be perfectly fine with labeling this behavior as 'good' as well.

That just seems like a pipe dream for every sod who can't get laid and has a backwards moral compass, but let's not dive into that.

Despite the fact that he's also abandoning all sense of self and is nothing more than a mindless puppet at this point. Through 'Steve Rogers' choosing this ending... he is actively doing wrong, and knows it. He is actively allowing Hydra to prosper, and... essentially...

Proving Zola right.

“We won, Captain. Your life amounts to your death, a zero sum!”

Familiar now, isn't it? But I guess every message we learned about Steve, in light of everything, in light of Peggy, is meaningless so long as he's... getting laid. Or 'happy'.

That doesn't sound fucked up at all, being perfectly okay with people suffering on your behalf. But I suppose it's no surprise that the people who love Atwell so much and are perfectly okay with her behavior feel the same way...

And here's the thing, I don't think 'Steve Rogers'... the real one in context of his story anyway, would be happy in a setting he needs to let others suffer on his behalf, and ignore their suffering, in order for him to be happy. Looking at his character just over the previous movies, I'd say this would in actuality be literal torment for him.

Spidey gave a perfect rendition that completely embodied everything Steve Rogers stands for and had stood for in those movies.

“When you can do the things that I can, but you don't, and then the bad things happen... They happen because of you...”

What a coincidence. And another important message.

If you actually think a man like Steve, a first responder by nature, who always seeks out the goodness in others and wants to help people, would suddenly sit on his ass and allow people to suffer for him? When he couldn't even do this while too small to make any real impact?

You are delusional. And it is disturbing that you would somehow label that as 'good', as 'cute', as 'healthy', as 'right', as 'true love'. As 'happy' for him.

This is a man, forced into retirement, under the 'guise' of a 'choice', when in reality, it is atrociously horrible writing that disregards anything about who he was and what he stood for. That had he been real, this would have been a disservice to him and is certainly one to every important message the character has, and the history behind him. He would have been stuck in this world. Trapped, and held back from doing anything. By someone who supposedly 'loves' him?

Love doesn't hold people back or hold on possessively like a fucking parasite, it sets people free.

Why would she do that to him? Why would she sit back and assume all of those things are 'okay'? How? Why would anyone want her to??? I thought Peggy was supposed to be a good character inspired by upholding his message. Did she break the vial? Did she keep him in her basement? Did she tell him to sit on his ass and 'look pretty' while she did all the work? A fucking horrible job I might add, if she just lets Hydra run rampant and kill Howard for her sake. How is someone like that admired as a 'good' person?

Nothing about this is 'good'.

This ending is not 'beautiful'. It is a horror story masquerading as something 'pretty'. It is an abuse story being normalized to a vast and unknowing public. At best, a horribly irresponsible message to send the public... and at worst... a reflection of what's wrong with society as a whole. Possibly with ulterior and deliberate intentions.

In order for this ending to happen, Steve Rogers must cut ties with his family and abandon all he loved, loves, lives for, all sense of self... all for Peggy, and solely Peggy's, satisfaction. Seems oddly... familiar to a certain situation his best friend, who seemingly means nothing to him, happened to be in... for 70 years.

Let's reverse the roles. If Steve had been a female to do this for a man's sake? The first thing people would notice is how unhealthy the relationship is. How obsessive it is. How harmful it is. And how disgusting the normalization of it is. In a media that has a far reach and should be so much more fucking responsible with the messages they send their viewers.

Knowing that there are so many sacrifices, ones that shouldn't be made, and that every sacrifice comes from Steve's end, would you willingly call this relationship healthy? Beautiful? 'True love'?

When in reality, they'd only shared one kiss, and never dated?

Yeah. Seems legit.

On the flip side, you have that other interpretation, right? The one where he's in an alternate universe and lets his Peggy live her life with another man, but steals this Peggy both from her future husband and himself.

You'd think it gets better, right? I mean he can fix this universe in full, he might fuck something up and we might consider it a bit irresponsible to play with timelines like that, but he can always just go back if it goes too bad. He's earned it, his shot at this life, still disregarding Sharon and now... a version of himself. A Steve still trapped in the ice. Still suffering on his behalf. While he lives out his life with supposedly this Steve's girl, this Steve's Bucky, and this Steve's entire potential life.

Oh, and apparently this Peggy really doesn't care about the Steve trapped in the ice, since she's also fine with a replacement that's totally different from the one she knew~! That's not weird or fucked up at all.

Leaving him to wake up, alone, in the future having known the life he wanted was knowingly taken by someone else. Someone selfish enough to leave him in the ice. Bucky's alive and safe from Hydra, yay! Apparently... no version from this alternate universe is worth giving the shield to though. So I guess Steve ultimately didn't love these replacements as much. And of course, this is assuming Steve doesn't also just leave this universe as is for everything else terrible to happen.

This is assuming he gives a shit at all. Because if he had?

Tell me why... defrosting the alternate Steve to live out a life with his own Peggy, to at least make sure one of them got that 'happy ending', could still do good, without abandoning anyone, could kick ass, could fix everything in this alternate timeline, maybe even with a few tips from this time traveling Steve, somehow wasn't acceptable compared to 'Steve Rogers' actively and willingly doing, and allowing terrible things to happen, and abandoning everyone else who loved him.

Once again, cut off from his family and replacing them all with clones.

This is supposed to be better?

Did he ever really love Peggy, or just the way she looked since any identical twin happened to work just fine?

Tell me why, if Chris Evans just wanted to stop playing the role, Steve going back for just the dance and asking for Peggy's blessing to marry Sharon, presumably after they'd actually made an effort to develop the relationship, presumably after Peggy has made her peace with loving someone else, and then coming back to not abandon his family or any of his principles or promises he made, or just who he is in general, and proposing to Sharon with Peggy's blessing and understanding, wouldn't have been better and more respectful in all ways?

With the characters, with their history, with their messages. Tell me how it wouldn't have been better to simply have him out of the spotlight and training recruits, but still actively being who he was and doing good somehow couldn't have been acceptable?

There, I can write a better ending than those quack professionals Marvel hired. Simple, easy, done. Where's my fucking job~?

Instead of demolishing every part of who he was, using an anti-bullying character... to reward bullying no less?

Even if Evans wanted to retire or would have made a decision like this, doesn't mean Cap would have ever even remotely done something similar. At least not a good version of him. Upholding the symbolic moral message the character presents would have been easy, but they were too stupid to even try.

Tell me how this ending doesn't disrespect a previous almost 60 years of an established comic relationship, a relationship need I remind in which Sharon was pregnant with Steve's child, one sadly lost, and later shared an adopted son with him. A relationship, that should they disrespect and retcon for Peggy's sake, will only serve to make Steve Rogers seem like a terrible person with no sense of loyalty to a woman he supposedly loved and has spent a good chunk of his life with. As opposed to sharing one kiss or brief romance with. For all intents and purposes, Sharon being his common law wife.

Ironically, the very thing Atwell claimed this relationship did in the MCU, despite the fact that her character only shared a single kiss with Steve, canonically. And she lied and actively manipulated fans into believing it was so much more. When... watch the movies, it wasn't.

Tell me how this ending doesn't disrespect the characters, including Peggy, and the messages they have conveyed, the convictions they've held over the years of their history, and the symbolism which I would argue is much more important, that they represent. Tell me how it doesn't somehow disrespect and belittle Bucky, Erskine, the idea that Howard was Steve's friend, or that any of the people Steve loved actually mattered to him, beyond Peggy.

Beyond getting laid. Because deny it all you want, that is what this ending boils down to. That is the only reason it exists.

Or, actually, I'd wager it also exists to actively squash the importance of the messages the characters convey.

Here's an idea. Johann Schmidt and comics Hydra Cap both have more conviction and loyalty to their cause than EG Cap. And Schmidt post IW/EG arguably causes less harm than EG Cap actively allows to happen right beside himself, because Schmidt is incapable of doing much as the stone's guardian.

And at least Hydra Cap made sense within the context of his storyline.

Prove me wrong.

That's the sort of Cap you have to support to like this ending. Hydra complacent, bigotry complacent, and completely castrated, or at the very least, willing to replace everyone he loves with clones while he takes an alternate Steve's life. Frankly, that's not a Cap I think anyone should support. And I don't think any fans, especially Peggy or Steggy fans should be somehow proud of the fact that this is the sort of 'Steve' that Peggy gets.

I mean... I suppose it is in fact the kind of Steve that sort of Peggy, equally complacent and horrible, would deserve? But that doesn't really stop it from being gross, does it?

Is that really what you'd want as a fan?

I've mentioned that Atwell's alleged behavior is inappropriate, excessive, disturbing. And I'll also mention, this kind of obsession for fictional characters is unhealthy. So why did she do this? Why the behavior at all, why did she go out of her way to essentially hurt Emily, discreetly of course, without people noticing? Why all the manipulation?

Well... it gets worse. And this is certainly where that allegedly becomes very important.

Take a moment to think for a minute about who benefited from this ending and how.

Atwell, most certainly, at Emily's expense of course. At the expense of fans. And an actual well written product we wouldn't get immediate buyer's remorse from. And of course maybe one that doesn't insult our intelligence?

You could assume she simply wanted money. Though somehow... that doesn't really fit. Maybe spotlight? That makes a little more sense, though just as bad. It's seedy, it's spiteful, it's uncomfortably close to a bad Harlequin manga villain. If you've ever read one of those.

They're based off old trashy romance novels if that gives any reference.

Except... what if you replaced every instance of 'Steve, Sharon, and Peggy', with instances of herself and Chris? With the names, 'Chris, Emily, and Hayley'.

Except Emily is happily married now, and can easily identify the difference between a romantic interest in her work, and in real life. Can easily discern a job from her private life. Because that's what a good, stable, actress or actor can easily do.

Suddenly, the situation takes on a very different meaning.

How creepy would that have been for her to do? Along with easily dismissed by the public.

Keep in mind, this is a woman who publicly admitted to, and even in plain view, groping this man, multiple times, without his explicit consent because she 'couldn't help herself'. Okay. Big deal, right? So she touched his 'man boobs' a couple times. He laughed it off, it was all good fun. Why would he complain, it's different, men shouldn't be complaining about being touched without their permission by beautiful women. Despite the fact that they're not, nor have they ever been, in a romantic relationship together.

It's perfectly appropriate for a woman to grope a man as she pleases, whether he is in a relationship with her or even other people, or not. He can't feel uncomfortable because of this, only woman can. Why would he ever be uncomfortable about it, and if he was, he would have said so. He loves her, they're friends!

Let me know if the hypocrisy needed for that logic is falling through the cracks here, because that seems like a dangerous double standard to set.

You shouldn't be allegedly or otherwise, touching or really molesting, in her own words 'groping', anyone publicly and suddenly, especially without their consent. But let's assume he was okay with every single time it had happened. Okay. Sure. Fine. It's his body to decide with who can touch him like that, who can invade his personal space and how, right? And besides, he loves the attention and being objectified by women.

That's clearly why he'll make an effort to actually call out and put people on the spot who pretend to talk to him through a faked photoshopped encounter, right? Clearly why he absolutely hates that.

Now let's assume he wasn't.

Why would he ever admit to that if the response we can expect is that 'he's a man, so he should be okay with it'? As if men somehow don't have a right to their own bodies or can't be sexually harassed and molested, abused, raped, you name it. Objectified maybe? Why would we be suspicious of the behavior or tell someone that it's wrong, without the full story even though it's happening in our plain view?

Playfulness and comfort between friends is one thing, boundaries between them is another, and friends can still cross boundaries they shouldn't. Sometimes they do. Consider the fact of a known straight man and a woman who is attracted to him, and suddenly the implications change. The man, so far, has not shown even remotely the same attraction.

But why would we suspect her behavior would entail anything other than support for her own character that she played, and the ship she was a part of, which had been respectfully written out of the story and made to move on? It's not like she was actively dragging down a woman, a real person, another actress that essentially got in her way, and the part she wanted to play. Kissing Chris Evans.

It's not like she claimed she'd be the best choice for Sharon's actress in blonde wig before Emily was cast. Oh wait...

Was that in that little blog sourcing everything she did and claimed? I can't remember.

And this is all speculation of course. But I think it's very important speculation. And especially, is a reason to be suspicious of everything she did. But I of course can't read her mind, only look at what she did do and what there's proof of. Allegedly.

Seems like an extreme extant to go to to to get an extra kiss from an actor, right? An actor who, mind you, dated other people, not her, and seemed to ultimately choose his dog over anyone. And of course, since we're speculating.

Under the pretense that 'Peggy' gets 'Steve', 'she' got the 'man' that everyone else wanted, right? She lived that fantasy, married him, and had kids with him, and everyone else is just jealous of her. The characters are meant for each other, she can take no blame in what's done with the characters.

Except when encouraging hatred among her fans and negative press for the company and story so long as it doesn't revolve around her.

In this light, looking at the facts, her alleged behavior is extremely creepy.

When you consider the fact that Evans suddenly, and I mean suddenly wanted to quit playing the character, seemingly out of nowhere when just a year before still wanting to do so, and at the same time, he admitted to loving the idea of continuing to play Cap, and even the prospect of doing a movie with Deadpool and Wolverine. Something that would have been brilliant by the way, and I lament that it apparently won't happen every day.

Source

Yes, there is a very special relationship there, read a fucking comic~.

Let's consider the fact that Evans said this about his 'final scene of Endgame'. To sow just a little bit of discord. Of course, there's no guarantee that this scene had anything to do with that one he shared with 'Peggy'. Speculation.

Let's assume it did. Let's go beyond and say, Hayley was the entire reason Evans wanted to quit. The entire reason he wouldn't fight this, and was done playing the character. Let's assume this was the last straw for him, and that he quit just to get away from her.

Allegedly.

Let's assume for just a moment, he was no longer comfortable or happy around this woman. And she was breaking him down. Let's assume he was just tired of all the bullshit, had maybe even seen it for what it really was, was even creeped out. And decided, sure. 'I'll keep my mouth shut... as long as I don't have to deal with her'.

We can also assume he's being... strongarmed into silence somehow, either by the company or by her. Maybe I'm going out on a limb here, but that man hasn't looked the slightest bit happy as of late, and it's noticeable in his interviews. Maybe there's a reason for that. But maybe this idea is pushing it a tad too far, let's take a step back for a moment and remember the simple fact that this is speculation.

Based on alleged actions and circumstantial evidence.

I could absolutely be wrong and I am willing to admit that.

If Chris Evans wanted to call me out on this, correct me about Atwell and her behavior specifically towards him in this regard, I would welcome it. Even if he managed to prove me wrong about the bullying, provide an article or interview of some kind that does in fact prove her innocence, I would be more than happy to take a look at it and retract everything I've mentioned here regarding her, and her behavior. Even delete this post, and publicly apologize to her.

I want to be wrong about this, because it is fucked up, it is creepy, it is something he should not have had to, or have to ever deal with. It is not something Emily should have ever had to deal with, let alone the fans.

Nor is it something that we should simply tolerate and accept from Hayley Atwell. From or towards anyone.

Chris Evans is a human being. Emily VanCamp is a human being. Both of them deserved the utmost respect from Atwell, along with everyone else, neither of them received this from her. Allegedly.

The messages conveyed by that rottenly horrific ending can't even begin to compare to how important this simple fact is.

Real people were hurt. Bullies were rewarded. This should not have happened. We cannot simply allow it to happen now, or in the future. We cannot simply allow more harm to be done, with the continued bullying from that Hydra Support Group I mentioned, and their continued attempts to get Emily fired and Sharon removed from the comics.

That they quite clearly don't give a shit to buy or even read.

Why is this important now, of all times, during a pandemic that is keeping us all indoors with nothing better to do?

Well for one, I'm indoors with nothing better to do than come across bullshit like this. There's also something to be publicly said about female abusers and how important it is that we start to recognize when these situations might be happening. Whether from a man or a woman. And whether to a man, or another woman. If she didn't hurt Chris, she certainly didn't hesitate to hurt Emily.

I have friends... that were living their lives off of the messages Cap taught and inspired in people. Good friends, good people. And maybe it seems silly to linger on something like that, but I can say first hand it is heartbreaking to watch those people get that same inspiration, those same moral messages ripped away, and stolen from them.

And be left struggling with trying to hold on to those messages, but try as they may, not being able to. And then come a few epiphanies, a few discoveries.

This shit. The bullying. The behavior, the fact that we as fans were given a normalized abusive relationship, and told it was somehow good, somehow just, somehow right. That that's the message we are being given in place of everything else...

I had a friend have a panic attack because of this ending, after she tried to rationalize that it was okay, that it was 'sweet', and 'cute', and understandable. Because it hit a little too fucking close to home for her, and now she just relives that, remembers it with almost any part of what her favorite thing in the world was. And that is horrifying to know...

“I helped support this. I gave them money. I dedicated years of my life to following this.”

And it goes so much more beyond regretting that decision. It goes so much more beyond being able to simply move on and somehow keep those symbols, or at least the core messages beyond them and disassociate them from the characters when you can't escape reminders of it. When you can see so incredibly clearly what it really means, what really happened, and everyone else around you just accepts that something so fundamentally wrong is something right.

Here's a question, can you sue a company that's so profoundly built an empire, so embedded itself into your day to day life that you can't escape a personal trauma being reminded of it in something you paid for and actively support for years from this company? Does that count as some form of being publicly irresponsible and projecting harmful ideologies?

Is that something someone can do, or is it just something a 'Karen' would do? Would the sheer evil it takes to become that type of person, to dawn that haircut and demand to speak to a manager be worth it in the end?

“What did it cost?”

“Everything...”

Yeah, it really fucking did.

Oh hey, by the way. Hayley Atwell is definitely a Karen. Just thought I might point that out. Why else would she throw a massive tantrum to get someone bullied out of a franchise because she's not getting her way or the spotlight on her? She's just an evolved one.

Allegedly.

I am all for people policing their own content and being respectful of creators, and understanding that fiction is different from reality. Not every concept will be stomachable or enjoyable by absolutely everyone. Horror in itself is a perfect example of that, especially psychological horror.

I can also say without a doubt that I hate knowing that the people I care about are so heavily affected by something they had initially used to make themselves a better person, that should remain fictional and symbolic but just somehow forces itself to go beyond that.

I hate knowing a corporation could be so irresponsible that this is the message they get billions of dollars for, that this is what they give to the public, that this lack of care or even noticing what they've done and who they've rewarded, and the continued behavior...

The bullying, and despite every piece of criticism screaming at them just how fucked up this is.

But no, they can't take two fucking seconds, to think 'maybe we made a bad move and shouldn't stick by this considering what it's done or is doing to fans'. 'Maybe we should be more responsible with the power and influence we happen to have'...

Except they knew.

“It might end the whole franchise.”

What kind of context am I supposed to imagine for those words. Especially in light of a franchise that had a multitude of plans to continue.

What the fuck does that mean?

And isn't that the most piss soaked cherry on top of this shit cake?

Hayley's words in the interview represent how little she cared about the character, about the franchise, about the fans, or the messages conveyed, as long as she got what she wanted.

And she did.

Publicly... adored... psychopath.

Allegedly.

Cap's core message is something so incredibly vital, I believe, to this world. Especially in these times. Especially when it comes to making progress.

“Doesn't matter what the press says. Doesn't matter what the politicians or the mobs say. Doesn't matter if the whole country decides that something wrong is something right. This nation was founded on one principle above all else: the requirement that we stand up for what we believe, no matter the odds or the consequences. When the mob and the press and the whole world tell you to move, your job is to plant yourself like a tree beside the river of truth, and tell the whole world –"No, you move."”

Especially in a world that will actively tell and show us that human lives aren't worth a dime a fucking dozen to the people we let control our world. Especially when we should be telling these same people.

“No, fuck you, that's wrong.”

And yeah, that fucking sucks. It fucking sucks to have family that is vulnerable to something potentially deadly, to be vulnerable to it, and have no control over that. It fucking sucks to know people you may trust will not even give a shit. And it is fucking hard to keep hope when everything around you just seems to be falling apart.

And you can't do a damn thing.

But this message teaches us just that. To not lose hope. To not lose faith. To keep fighting for what we believe in, and make things better. Isn't that the whole point of criticism? Challenging ideas, beliefs, so that we can discern right from wrong and have a better understanding of what that might be? So that we can improve? What a hell of time it would be to have this message with us. What a hell of a time for us to need this message, now more than anything... and not have it.

What a hell of a time for someone to willingly quit portraying and sending that message... Though I can't say I'd blame him, he's only human, it's a heavy burden to bear, and if Atwell really did do all of this just to kiss him... Allegedly.

Well, I'd wanna get away from her too. Provided it was willing at all. I get mixed signals from that guy. And trust him about as far as I can throw him. I am a weak bitch, so that is not very far... But... professional liar, so.

He could also be the world's biggest troll, cause I don't believe for a second he didn't know how fans would react to this. Which... biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch. But also, RESPECT.

And also, BITCH! Be serious for a goddamn second, this is fucking important!

But this message also teaches rebellion.

What a hell of a message to publicly squander in order to keep people complacent, for the sake of pretending someone gets a 'happy' horrific ending, finally getting laid. Like neither of those things were something that couldn't be found in the future while still preserving the legacy of the character.

Right?

Ironically, it was a message they had helped to represent with Sharon, and still there's the issue of her and fans being publicly bullied and disrespected, once again, a real person, people, for Atwell's sake.

If we only surround ourselves by those that tell us what we want to hear, rather than the truth, we can only stagnate our growth.

If we only care when we are finally forced to face the problems evident, can we really call ourselves virtuous?

If we do nothing knowing something is wrong, what does this say about us?

I'm just as guilty in not noticing these sorts of things as they happen until it's too late, but I'd like to hope I'm getting better and paying more attention, and that we can still do better.

What's the point of all this, and what can we do?

As I said before, I do not want to cause harm. I do not want people to go and harass anyone for alleged wrong doings or behavior of any sort. I do not want people to lose entire jobs or livelihoods over this. But it is clear something is wrong, and we certainly need to right it. I also don't believe any of the parties involved are somehow beyond redemption. Even Hayley.

If Marvel had any sense, especially now, they would retcon this, however necessary, first off. They don't even need Evans to do that, they can do something as simple as making a comic that undoes this nasty ending and saves Cap, and the other characters, from being made into an empty shell and castrated version of himself. Or at least make a solid plan to and very publicly apologize to Emily for the situation and discourage such behavior among their fandom. Hayley would do the same, not just to fans but especially to Emily, and maybe even Chris.

If you ever participated in this behavior and now understand that it was wrong, I would encourage you to go give Emily your love and support and apologize to her for this mess and what she had to deal with on behalf of fans. She deserved far better. She still deserves better.

If Hayley refused to acknowledge or even publicly address this? Or Marvel, Disney for that matter, well it would just go to show that they'd want it all swept under the rug instead of being held accountable for what happened. Something that's certainly a disrespect to Walt Disney , as he was able to make amends and admit to his mistakes publicly, and it's a stain on the legacy he left behind that the current Disney can hardly be bothered to.

And yes, believe it or not, there's a way to not let them do this without aggressive harassment.

My first suggestion is meme the shit out of it. Be an absolute troll and make a joke of this giant fucking joke of a company that can't even put two and two together for basic story elements. To an extant that will publicly embarrass them for sure, be relentless, but don't send hate.

Just show everyone the clowns they are~.

I've been told this can also be a bit mean though. And clearly, we can't simply let them forget it or forget it ourselves.

The second, ask questions. Simply ask for this to be addressed, try to get it noticed as best you can. Send them this across as many platforms as you can to as many people as you can. Or even just the smaller blogs I linked. Repost, reblog, and share this as much as you can and make it something they can't ignore without sending them direct hate and harassment. Copy and paste or just send a link to this in a concerned email to the corporation. Make sure their offices are absolutely buzzing with the news. Ask, don't demand, your favorite MCU actors to publicly speak out about this, please. Keep asking until you get some sort of response.

Without being rude.

Because it may take time, it may take effort, but it is important, and it certainly should be addressed. And never allowed to happen again.

As for Atwell and her bullies?

Well, first let me congratulate her.

She played herself. All those jokes about turning Peggy into a supervillain and that's exactly what she did. With her own wants and desires, not Peggy's.

But otherwise be kind, be courteous, and hold your grace and elegance. Treat her with the same respect you would want for yourself and do not stoop to her or their level. Do not insult her. Ask her, 'what's wrong'? Ask her why she did this, if she's okay. Ask her to stop, to speak out about it, to address the situation and to understand why she didn't do it sooner. Ask her if she's seeking help for whatever psychological issues she may have that would push her to do something like this, wish her well, and tell her you hope she finds the help she needs and learns that what she did was wrong. Let her know you're disappointed if you're a fan.

She definitely shouldn't be allowed to keep relishing in the reward and aftermath of what she did, and she definitely owes Emily, and possibly Chris, an apology for all the bullshit she encouraged and did. Her behavior, allegedly, is fucking creepy.

But she's still a human being, behaviors are correctable.

Simply address the fact that it was wrong and ask her if she understands that. Also maybe that... public molestation isn't okay? Allegedly.

Do the same for her bullies, if they are rude to you, simply tell them:

'Oh... you support Hydra... you're entitled to your opinion, but I'll have to disagree.'

And leave it at that. Just take comfort in the fact that you can recognize an abusive relationship and don't support it. You cannot force them to change their minds if they don't want to, do not antagonize them or potentially bring harm to yourself by doing so. And yes, that is admittedly a bit mean, a bit trollish~, and the reality is they probably don't support Hydra... But they also kinda have to to support this ending somehow.

The writers 'confirmed' Hydra Trash Party as canon while the directors 'confirmed' everyone in Steve's life being replaceable.

And he still becomes a creepy uncle while someone needs to suffer on his behalf for 70 years.

Fantastic~! I'm accepting neither and I give you no money until it's fixed! Because it's gross~!

If this situation is addressed by everyone involved, and any allegations and speculations I've made are in fact proven true, but let's say Atwell still publicly refuses to admit to anything she did or apologize to Emily. Even if Disney does. Well, she'll be proving exactly what type of person we suspect her to be. And only then would I consider it acceptable for the company to completely erase her from the franchise in turn and blacklist her from what they produce. Some people might consider that too nice, I think it's reasonable, you're free to disagree.

Not necessarily her character though, Peggy has actually done nothing wrong on her own, she's a fictional character best represented by good writers, and malleable according to that. And I would certainly even encourage much better character explorations and portrayals of her. But Hayley herself, who would then become pretty much a poster child for harassment and bullying, and defending psychopathic behaviors...

Allegedly.

If people try to silence you, ignore you, keep trying, keep spreading the message, keep going as much as you can, until we manage to get this addressed and the situation finally corrected.

Do not support the company, or actress that refuses to address this. Do not support people that do terrible things without holding them accountable. Do not allow them to simply get away with it, but do not lose your own humanity for their sake.

I know first hand how fucking hard it is not to lose your shit when shit like this happens. And nobody notices. But I guarantee, throwing a fit of rage will get nothing done, and they will try to use it against you.

If they manage to prove me wrong in any regards? Great! I will be fucking overjoyed! I hate the idea that evil is actively happening in the world and people do nothing about it, don't you?

And a friendly reminder.

You are not in anyway required to purchase anything from Marvel, any of the actual bullshit content and harmful ideas they refuse to take any criticism or responsibility for. You are not obligated to them just because you are a fan, and you do not owe them anything. If they want our money, they can earn it, but you can definitely get your fixes of good creative content elsewhere, and even support other artists. If this is what they provide, you do not have to support them. You can make your own. For free. And enjoy what others make for free. For any and all people part of an intricate creative community, fan fiction does not just have to be trashy romance or gay ass ships. That is a huge chunk of it, I won't even bother lying about that, I'm under no illusions otherwise.

But it can also be just simple storylines based off what canons you like, simple fan comics that maybe present a different sort of story arc you aren't seeing developed and wonder where you might go with it. It can be action, scifi, fantasy, horror. It can be any sort of fusion that you would enjoy. It can even be insanely good or horrendously bad! It can even be original fiction! And yes, you're more than allowed to publicly critique and parody the work these companies sell you, go write ahead~, and make a point of making something better. Because you can.

Or it can be shipping wars and nonsensical shit and trashy romance and smut. Again, no illusions that there's not a whole lot of that shit.

Or crack. Lots of crack fic.

But the beauty of it is that it's up to you. And you don't owe anyone anything because everything you get to make is free. But keep in mind that goes both ways in this aspect. For you and others, and I'd wager to say there are a lot of writers out there that can definitely do these characters and their messages a much better justice than the disservice and disrespect Marvel has given them and the fans. Especially as of late.

Lastly, especially in these times... do not lose hope.

Do not lose faith in the message Steve Rogers stands for, or in the hopes things may get better. For all of us. And for the character? That he may just yet be saved from quite plainly, all the bullshit. That any of your favorite characters might be given better treatment down the line. And if not?

Save 'em yourself. Make it better yourself. And make it known, no matter what happens, no matter what they do, these messages can't be squandered or destroyed. Hold them dear, and don't accept anything less than them being upheld, no matter how it's represented.

Particularly when you're paying for it. Don't harass small time writers that write self indulgent bullshit for free. Just police your content accordingly, please.

But the message?

That's what's important.

In conclusion?

'Logan' was the better movie. Hayley turned Peggy into 'Monika' of Doki Doki Literature Club. And Chris Evans chose his dog.

“I don't like bullies... I don't care where they're from.”

;)

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harrowscore · 3 years ago

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Mikasa Ackermann, Levi Ackermann, Amane Misa, Aeron Greyjoy for the charactet ask :3

SOMEONE HEARD MY PRAYERS AND NOW MY TIME HAS COME, tysm!!!!! <3

okay, let's start with levi (my beloved):

hogwarts house: gryffindor (maybe....?) | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff

ugh, the hp sorting house system is way too reductive. he has qualities of gryffindor, slytherin, and hufflepuff - brave, astute, loyal to a fault, etc. so it's a hard choice. but if i really have to choose, i'd go for gryffindor. i know that his Bad Boy facade shouts slytherin, but while he has larger goals (killing all the titans, then saving the world etc.), he's got no actual ambition for himself. hufflepuff would also be a good option.

daemon (from the his dark materials series): (because i've just decided that's just way more accurate than the hp method) some kind of big feline. maybe a panther - a black panther would be the ideal - aloof, predatory, dangerous, fiercely independent.

best quality: besides his obvious strenghts as a leader and warrior, the way he cares for his comrades-in-arms. it's very hard to gain his trust and respect, but once you have it, it's forever. he's pragmatic and ruthless, yes, but he also has a huge capacity for compassion and friendship. not that he would be effusive about his affections, of course.

worst quality: none, he's absolutely perfect ❤ jklsdfhjk jokes aside, he really struggles to open up (a serious understatement), idt he ever talked about his traumatic past with anyone. i mean, maybe he mentioned it to hange and erwin (erwin knew him when he was still an undergound thug, so...), but... he's not great with feelings. despite his apathetic, intimidating mask, he feels and cares deeply, but he has a long history with losing the people he loves, so he tries to not personally care about his squadmates, which can be both a strenght and a weakness. of course, he spectacularly fails at this.

ship them with: well, it's not a secret that i'm a huge rivamika fan, this ship is almost literally consuming my waking thoughts lmao. imo they're perfectly compatible: very similar personalities (stoic, the strongest warriors, absolutely terrifying on the battlefield but with a soft underbelly), very similar pasts/experiences, so many parallels that it's actually ridiculous, etc. i love how they're both each other's equals and likeness (yes, i took it from jane eyre. no, i don't regret anything lmao). a lot of tropes i love, too: Terrible First Impression (the Pride and Prejudice vibes are so strong with these two, you have no idea), Kindred Spirits/Mirror Images, Veteran/Young Prodigy, The Last of Their Kind, even Height Difference lmao. i could write a whole rivamika manifesto, but this is already too long. (maybe for some other time 👀) i would've loved for their dynamic to be more explored in canon but alas, isayama clearly didn't give a shit about the ackerman legacy, he just used it as a plot shortcut to give them conveniently unique powers, since they never really talked about it 🙄 (and before some troll comes into my askbox shouting "you iNcEsT fReAk!!!!1!!", they're only very distantly related. we know shit about the ackermans but we know for sure that they've got at least several generations between them. biologically their shared DNA is 0%, obviously they don't see each other as family, all the eldians have a dead ass common ancestor from 2000 years ago so they're all basically ⁓related anyway. if you really wanna scream about i.ncest, go watch got/dark/the borgias and shut the fuck up please. or alternatively go outside and touch some grass) sorry for the rant, uh. anyway, i can also see levi/erwin. idk if i'd ever care enough to read a fic about them (i'm usually a huge multishipper, but for some weird reason not when it comes to rivamika? same with braime and kastle tbh), but still, i can see it.

brotp them with: hange and erwin, obv. veteran trio >>> ema trio, sorry not sorry (at least h. and e. died before yams had the chance to ruin their character arcs)

needs to stay away from: ...uh, filth, i guess? lmao

misc. thoughts: besides the stupid teenage fangirl crush i have on him, i'm genuinely fascinated by the man himself. he's a huge mess of a contradictions, and yet somehow it works: he's violent and brash and kind of an asshole, but also has a strong moral code and integrity; he's obv very skilled at all the killing/torturing stuff and yet he has a huge respect for life; he's got a potty mouth to say the least, and yet some very aristocratic manners/tastes (the way he sits, his preference for tea and usually refined clothes); he comes from what's supposed to be an illustrous bloodline, he's methodical and very precise, and yet he was born and raised in the underground, he's been used to filth and blood and poverty since he was a child, kenny of all people was his father figure, and probably has known no other life than a perennial survival mode existence. he's "humanity's strongest soldier", but while well-built he's also small, the david to the titans' goliah, and probably not what people would assume a born warrior looks like. he's also one of the few characters who stayed true to himself and his original characterization until the end, bless you smol king ❤

(okay, this is getting long!)

mikasa:

hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff

this is actually easy: mikasa belongs to hufflepuff and no, i won't take criticism (just joking lol). enough with this "hufflepuffs are fluffy puppies/Cinnamon Rolls <3" thing: mikasa values loyalty and duty more than anything else. she's also hardworking... and fierce, strong, lethal. yes, hufflepuff and lethal are not mutually exclusive concepts.

daemon: (finally the better option) a she-wolf, fiercely protective of her pack.

best quality: loyal, brave, incredibly strong (alongside her more fragile qualities). practical and level-headed on the battlefield, at least when eren is not included in the picture.

worst quality: struggles to let go of the past (understandable, considering her trauma). tunnel-vision when it comes to eren, obv. extreme levels of delusions ("if only i spoke openly about my romantic feelings for him - as if i didn't made them abundantly clear in ⁓6 years - he wouldn't kill 80% of humanity :(((" lmao okay. just. okay), but that's more on the writing. she's sadly more static than any other main character throughtout the whole series.

ship them with: see above :) but recently i've also started to be intrigued by mikasa/annie and mikasa/sasha. also, i'm sympathetic to jeankasa fans, though i don't actually care for the ship.

brotp them with: EMA trio, especially armin+mikasa. their friendship is so beautiful and special. also sasha.

needs to stay away from: ...... eren, at least romantically. again, that's more on the writing than anything else, but e.remika unfortunately encompasses many tropes i loathe with all the strength of my old shriveled heart: childhood friends-to lovers where the (male) childhood friend doesn't acknolewdge/is completely indifferent to the other (female) friend's romantic feelings, she hopelessly pines for him for years without anything more than a cold shoulder... until in the last chapter it's revealed that he loved her all along and doesn't "want other men to have her!!! :((" (then why did you have no reaction whatsoever to jean's years-long crush on her while she was jealous of any vaguely female-shaped human being you were friendly to, including hange? are you that dumb, man?); the female character's development and entire arc 100% revolves around the male protagonist - she has no goals, no dreams of her own except staying with him forever and ever; the romance is based on an idealized childhood dream, therefore reaffirming those childish illusions would make the character regress, not actually grow up (and nope, epilogue!jk doesn’t count; that also lacks build-up - i would’ve said the same about rm as well, so it’s not about shipping, guys, it really isn’t - and mikasa needed an inner change; getting married to another man but still praying to eren’s shrine is not substitute to actual development lol). post-time skip she's never really frustrated/angry with him, they never get a confrontation about him becoming a, y'know, mass-murderer of gigantic (pun intended) proportions; she puts him on a pedestal, and never stops idealizing him/never sees him for what he actually is (the narrative framing him as some kind of tragic martyr/saint eren from paradis with zero agency and basically... no clear motivation for the abovementioned mass murder, and not the actual complex tragic anti-hero/villain motivated by revenge and righteous fury he deserved to be, does not help). it lacks a good or even decent build-up - it's basically all tell and not show. now, if they'd actually been childhood friends to enemies to lovers/mutually co-dependent... it could have been interesting. sadly, it's not my cup of tea. of course this is just my personal preference, no hard feelings to the shippers.

misc. thoughts: enormous potential. she's been my fav female character since s1 - and ah, i miss s1!mikasa, when she had actually other stuff to do besides mothering eren. i love that she's the strongest warrior (second only to levi, obv), that her skills are never called into questions despite her gender, i love how she stands up for herself and the people she loves, that she may seem cold and stoic and yet has a such a huge heart, that she's not perfect but also sometimes awe-inspiring. sadly, she never really gets out of eren's shadow; what she lacks is an arc focused on herself. that's why imo getting deeper into the ackerman lore would've helped (also, you cannot make the main female character and the most popular male character descend from the same Unique Bloodline or whatever, and never really make them acknowledge it out loud; as a writer, you just can't lol). my spite is so strong that i'm currently writing a ridiculously pretentious fic that's 70% development for her character, to give her a voice, and 30% ackerthirsting. (yes, that's the fic i'm always vagueblogging about lmao, rip @ my brain). if any other rivamika fan is interested… mind you, it’s in italian tho, and idt i have the skills to translate into english.

misa:

hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff

daemon: mmh, maybe some kind of butterfly? beautiful, colorful, and short-lived.

best quality: glorious fashion sense, more inventive and ingenious than fans actually give her credit for.

worst quality: shallow, impulsive, and obv her dependence on/obsession with light (which stems from trauma btw, but still… the very opposite of a relationship between equals).

ship them with: rem, kinda (monster/human ftw!). also weirdly enough mogi, a little bit? she deserves someone who actually respects her… though she’s far from being a perfect angel. she may actually be crazier than light on some aspects. but in this house we stan evil ladies anyway, so i have no problem with that <3

brotp them with: uh, idk, maybe matsuda?

needs to stay away from: obv light. also takada.

misc. thoughts: a tragic victim of sexist writing. she may be… unhinged to say the least, but she didn’t deserve the abuse she got from light (and from the fans). the female characters’ writing in dn is so bad that idk if it’s on purpose, to kinda mirror the reality of women in a patriarchal society (dependent on men, housewives whose life entirely revolves around their husband/boyfriend etc.), or just casual misogyny lol. it’s even more baffling since we don’t know the author’s gender (they may be a man, a woman, nb, anything really). i tend for the latter option tho.

aegon greyjoy (now, i wasn’t expecting him lol):

hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff

i’m so sorry, i haven’t the slightest idea lmao. maybe gryffindor? mind you, it’s been a long time since i’ve re-read the books, so i don’t have many thoughts about him.

daemon: maybe it’s cliché, but some kind of fish/squid lmao

best quality: ugh, i really can’t remember much from his chapters :(( he’s not a coward, i guess? (lame answer, sorry!)

worst quality: definitely his religious fanaticism.

ship them with: no one.

brotp them with: uh… his family, ig? except euron.

needs to stay away from: obv euron. brr ://

misc. thoughts: i genuinely like the greyjoys chapters, though i vastly prefer the martells (with the exception of theon and asha, bcs i love them). yes, they’re deranged. yes, victarion is… well, victarion lol. but the drowned god religion is actually interesting, grrm knows how to write trauma - every time aeron mentions euron and that freaking door i’m like… :// - and the tragedy of it all… just great writing all around.

okay, that’s the end lmao. thank you so much, love!!! ❤❤

#1 #2 #3 #4 #5 #asks #cafeleningrad #if *anyone* dares to start stupid wank on my super niche blog they'll be blocked on sight i'm warning you #snk salt

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giogio-gucci-gangstar · 5 years ago

Text

Mudad Adventures: The Hol Horse Special

Summary: DIO leaves Giorno with Hol Horse for a short vacation. Both Hol and Giorno are less than thrilled.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/23027542/chapters/55487023

“Uh sir, you want me to do what?” Hol’s jaw hit the floor as DIO once again explained his little plan of a weekend getaway. Leaving GioGio in the sole care of a Hol Horse.

“Are you sure no one else can watch the kid? What about Vanilla? That guys got to have ice cream and all that kiddie shit coming out of his ass right?”

“Interesting choice of words Hol… You’re not wrong by any means but I feel Giorno would be better in your hands,” DIO was trying to woo Hol with compliments but Hol simply raised an eyebrow and DIO straightened up.

“Well that little bastard would just have too much fun bossing Vanilla around all weekend and this is supposed to be my vacation not his.”

DIO sauntered off, it wasn't like there was much Hol could do to change the situation anyway.

~~~~~~~

Honestly Giorno was a little skeptical of anyone who was friends with his father, but out of all of his devout followers he found Hol Horse the most interesting. Yes Vanilla Ice waited on him hand and foot, but that was because he wanted to kiss DIO’s ass. Enyaba would bake him treats, and the D’Arby brothers would play games with him occasionally (very rarely would they allow someone as unskilled as a child to play though), and sometimes even Pet Shop would allow a soft head pat without threatening to peck his eyes out.

But of all of these people (and hawk) it seemed that only Hol Horse truly respected Giorno. Or feared him. But being five that distinction didn't really matter, Giorno just wanted someone to play with who wasn't doing it to impress his father.

Which is why Giorno was sitting patiently on the counter as Hol scratched around in the near empty cabinets looking for something edible. The kid was curious as to what Hol Horse would conjure up. DIO wasn't much of a cook but when he did it was an event to say the least.

Hol Horse gestured for Gio to come help. Hol easily picked him up and lifted him up to the tops of the cabinets. “Ok kid see anything we can eat?”

“Ummm,” Giorno’s eyes scanned the dark shelf, eagerly picking up spilled chocolate chips that actually turned out to be dead flies. Just the same he stuck them in his pockets for later, this time just a snack for Godzilla and not himself. “Oh! I think there's some of Pet Shop’s cans, oh wait they're tuna.”

“Great grab it. I found an avocado so I can show you the Hol Horse Special.” Hol sounded less than enthusiastic about the offer but he figured if he spun it the right way he could feed the kid and then DIO would be back and he would no longer be responsible for another human being.

Giorno swung his legs off the counter kicking slowly back and forth with a concerned look spreading across his face. He wasn't too much of a picky eater, with DIO you hardly could be, but he wasn't at all pleased with the sound of canned tuna mushing with the avocado. It was all a little too moist for his taste…

Hol Horse eagerly presented his masterpiece to the kid. One bowl. Two forks. Lots of green and pink. Hol waited expectantly for Giorno to take a bite but he noticed his apprehension.

“Oh come on kid it ain't that bad! Look I even sprinkled in some pepper and squeezed a little lemon. It's great! Real cowboy food. Tons of protein.” None of this was phasing the boy who just looked Hol Horse dead in the eye with an expression of ‘you're going to have to pry my mouth open if you want me to eat this shit’. Hol Horse knew he was going to have to pull a good old guilt trip on this boy.

“Don't you want to grow big and strong like your daddy? Or, maybe you’d rather I tell him you refused to eat and see what he comes up with? I’m sure he has some other special options for you.” They both knew Hol was referring to DIO’s questionable blood sources that he had been desperately trying to get Giorno to try. Maybe it was less guilt trip and more inspiring fear of his father’s wrath… Either way Hol was happy to walk that fine line of moral greyness if it meant DIO didn't snap his neck for starving his son.

Giorno haphazardly took the spoon, shivering because he knew no decent fish should be served with a spoon, and slowly brought it to his mouth. He held his breath, nearly plugging his nose, to swiftly inhale the food. Giorno shoveled the monstrosity into his mouth as Hol Horse slowly ate his portion, lounging against the counter and rambling on about how one of his relatives always used to make something like this and how it was a good meal for on the road etc. etc. etc.

For the rest of the weekend Giorno showed no expressions of hunger, afraid of what else Hol Horse might have tucked up his sleeve. The boy by no means starved, he had hidden stashes of junk food and candy all over the mansion, but he did make a point to avoid meal times with Hol Horse.

~~~~~~~

“DADDY!!” Giorno screeched as DIO opened the door the next evening. Giorno practically wrapped himself around the muscular thigh of his father. DIO cackled with delight. The boy was clearly happy to see him, and had even called him daddy, none of that damned ‘papa’ shit he had been spewing.

DIO was doing his best to act unaffected by his son’s rare display of affection, but spared the boy a little pat on the head before sending him off to bed.

He just as quickly turned to Hol Horse, “How did you do that so quickly? You drove him right into my arms! Did you see how he hugged my leg? It was almost like he missed me!” DIO was elated, this was by far the most emotion Hol had seen on the man (excluding blood lust of course). Slowly however, it all started to come together in Hol Horse’s head.

“Were you trying to punish your child by making him spend time with me?” Hol asked deadpan. He was pretty used to DIO’s antics by now and honestly should have expected as much.

“If you must phrase it that way so be it.”

With a look of utter exhaustion Hol turned to DIO, “You just had me watch him so he'd miss you.” There was no need to question, it was a statement both he and DIO now knew to be true.

“Was that not obvious?”

#Mudad #mudad adventures #my nonsense #my nonesense #giorno #DIO #Hol Horse #The Hol Horse Special #Hol Horse Special

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popculturebuffet · 4 years ago

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Paul Dini’s Jingle Belle: The Mighty Elves (Comissoned by WeirdKev27)

Well well boys, we’re back to Jingle Belle with another kevmission, though per his request i’ll be getting back to Life and Times Of Scrooge McDuck at long last. I also have some other stuff planned and all that, but for now, let’s focus on everyones faviorite elfen hellion as we dive back into Paul Dini’s Jingle Belle.

I covered most of the behind the scene’s stuff last time so in short in case your just joining us, since this one’s got a bit more stuff to tag: Jingle Belle is an indie comic book character created by animation god Paul Dini, the daughter of Santa Claus and the Queen of Elves who acts like a standard rebellious teenager sterotype and causes trouble for her dad. Last time I touched on the character a good two days ago, we looked at her first appearance, where she sent her family to Family Therapy. At the time I’d ONLY read that story, and hadn’t gotten that far into Jing’s world just yet. As you probably guessed despite plugging a decent amount of time into re-reading the rest of Scott Pilgrim (shout out to my good friend Mike for the early christmas present), on digital and in color and into the Switch port of the first Fire Emblem, I still got 2/3 of the way through the omnibus Kev gifted me of almost all her stories up to 2018′s The Handmade’s Tale. Honestly not a lot has changed from the pilot.. while Jing’s designs changed a bit, she’s still more of a rebellious hellion, and while Santa’s no longer a slut shaming jackass, he’s still hard on her while her mom tries to keep the peace, The humor’s still edgy, if toned down enough to support returning whenever Dini felt like it but it’s largely the same for better or worse. Overall the stories haven’t been bad but have been a bit reptitive to read in one giant omnibus. This really is down to the format they were made in: These were one off stories spread months apart meant to be picked up off the shelf with no real ongoing stories or character development and only some slight worldbuilding here and there. In short not bad stuff, just clearly not built to be collected in a huge omnibus like it was and not the first comic collection i’ve encountered with this problem and definitely not the last.

That being said the stories are creative and still well put together. It is Paul Dini and he has wrote pretty much every story collected here with few exceptions, so it’s still good stuff, just as I said clearly not meant to be read all in one block like i’ve been doing. And today’s story happens to be one of my faviorites so far, breaking the formula up a bit by having Jing do something a bit diffrent and also involving hockey, a sport this story made me realized might actually intrest me on some level.. if in part due to letterkenny.

God bless those two handsome idiots. So let’s ice up or skates, get those letterkenny refrences at the ready and see what the Mighty Elves have to offer.

We start at Hockey Practice for Santa’s Hockey Team, The Elves, the kind of sentence that makes me really happy to type for money. Santa’s team is naturally for this kind of story and what the title references, are the last place in the bi-polar hockey league their in.. presumably ran by commissioner bi-polar bear.

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Again, I really love this job and that i’m actually getting paid for this this go round. Anyway, Santa’s team isn’t all that agressive because.. well i’ts a team coached by Santa, why would they be? But Santa’s still proud of his boys... as for his girl on the otherhand he gets a call and we soon find out via mugshots Jing dragged her two friends, up from just one in previous stories, to an air force base, somehow got arrested for hitting on enlisted men, not a crime, and stealing and crashing a helicopter, very much a crime. Naturally Santa isn’t pleased, so we cut to a few days later where he’s letting her friends off making robo kitties, damn I want one of those now, while leaving Jing to do the packaging, though like most stern but fair dad’s he admits he dosen’t like punishing her and is right in saying there’s more to do with her summer vacation than you know, piss off the military. Santa needs his flight clerance dammit. Jing complains there isn’t much to do but feed the reindeer and make toys to which I say.. really santa? You haven’t set up anything else for your eleves to do? Making toys is their job. Build a fucking movie theater. And at the very least if not for them than for your bored and rebellious daughter to distract her from doing crimes. She’s still likely got a few hundred years of teenagering left, give her something else to do other than piss you off. Santa does have a least a little something: Hockey! Which Jing’s cousin Rusty has taken up. Rusty showed up in the first story but I kind of glossed over him, he’s basically Jing’s Dorky cousin she frequently abuses. Not really much more or less to him. Jing isn’t on board mostly because their team always looses, to the other teams: The Penguins, the Polar Bears, The Snow Leopards and the Eskimos because they don’t really have killer instinct, which yeah is kind of necessary for hockey. To her..

But during her rant she does show Santa she’s got genuine talent for the sport, so he makes her a deal: Do a little favor for him, and she’ll swap that for making toys.. it’s a deal.. one she soon regrets but hey.

Jing naturally makes an ass of herself pretty quickly beating the shit out of Rusty with her dad repremanding her and threatning to throw her off the team if she has another outburst like. That is until she runs into the Huskies Coach, Stan.

I mean i’ts a hairy old man who makes a side bet with Santa Claus despite it technically being against commission rules, might as well be. So Santa tells Jing screw it, as long as it’s the opposing team violence is a-okay. And naturally our first target is the world famous hockey player, aka snoopy aka a snoopy stand in. And being a big fan of peanuts i’m a sucker for a good peantus parody. Doubly so since Dini did his homework, and as I’d remembered and a quick google confirmed “The World Famous Hockey Player” was indeed one of snoopy’s many personas.

Not that it was much of a stretch: just about any time snoopy played a sport he was “the world famous X player”, but still it’s a nice little nod. Not so nice is Jing within seconds slamming him into the air and under a Zamboni and getting sent to the box for it naturally. So clearly she’s the shorsey of this team, all chirps and ultra violence.

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Snoopy is thankfully still alive, if barely, though he’s off course been through much worse.

But while in the Box jing helps advise the team and a presumed combination of her beating the shit out of the other team’s best players and her team now not only having something to inspire them but a strategy means the Elves win for once! Santa and Jing share a hug, though Santa advises her not to go for his wallet, it’s still a sweet moment as she’s genuinely invested now. So we cut to..

Okay Hank Ribbon seal is genuinely one of the best things humanity has made but as for Quiki I just... wow that joke is mildly racist at worst, confusing and unfunny at best. I mean... it really just makes no sense on any level and that’s with me not knowing a lot about hockey, but knowing just enough to know Kathy Lee Gifford existed. Just.. what even was that? I know Paul can do better than this.. because as my first review outlined he wrote a LOTTTT of Tiny Tune Adventures including my favorite episode. He also wrote most of the best Joker episodes for BTAS, so it’s not like the guy CAN’T be funny.. so I have no idea how he could fail so hard with this. Just.. what is this. Who thought this was funny? what was the joke?

That.. utter bafflement aside, this newscast is used to push things ahead as the elves are on a winning streak, having also beaten the Polar Bears and the Penguins.. though weirdly we DON’T get a cameo by this guy despite having already had Snoopy show up.

That’s my boy. But yeah there’s only two teams left with this, the Eskimos and tonight’s matchup the Snow Leopards, aka snow catgirls lead by Tashi Ounce, who Jing met at the winter games last year and lost too and thus has a whole rivlary thing going. In a really nice moment Santa stops to make sure Jing is okay going into the game.

It’s part of why I REALLY like this story: Santa instead of just being disapointed in his daughter genuinely bonds over her over something and Jing shows she has a softer side to her. It’s some good character stuff, helps shake up the normal formula nicely. Back to the usual though she and Tashi naturally go at it, phrasing, and fight the whole damn time, with Belle eventually scoring the winning goal. Though noticably while Tashi is just as competiive as belle and lost this time.. she’s fine with it, knowing she’ll win next time and congradulating the opponent. But before she can leave the rink, Tashi is approached by a mysterious figure with an offer and we cut to said figure’s lair... it’s THE BLIZZARD WIZARD! dun dun dun!.... yeah I haven’t introduced him the Blizzard Wizard is.. well exactly what he sounds like, as well as the former ruler of the North Pole. He enslaved everyone there to do his bidding and was essentially, a butt till Santa showed up, united all the various animals and kicked his ass. Since then he’s been reduced to basically a rankin bass villian, lurking near bye and scheming to get petty revenge on Santa for it. So essentially....

Minus the tragic backstory. He offers them a deal: The championship cup for him defeating the elves. As he puts it the cup symbolizes hard work, respect and team work.. i.e the things their throwing out to get payback. Tashi wants none of it, but the blizzard wizard has his slush minons capture her and with the rest willing to sell out, he gets to work.

Bliz snows out the eskimos, and brings up accusations of Santa gambling, which he gets away from by.. having his wife donate the money real quick don’t ask just go. But he has a waiver signed by the other coaches so their playing his goons. But Jing isn’t phased and Santa asks her to give the lockeroom some inspiring words.

10/10 no notes. But naturally Bliz has a sneaky trick up his sleeves.. to win.. specifically a hot french canadian player which.. makes jing fall to pieces flirting with him and makes her entirely ineffective. Okay time out.... huh so this is the timeless void known only to zack morris, that girl from the reboot I haven’t watched, and Regis Filbin. But yeah while I wouldn’t expect Jing to slaughter the guy it feels out of character for all she’d do is to giggle like an idiot instead of making a move. She’s been established as forward and knowing what she wants. I’m not against her being distracted by this it’s just the how that feels off especially since the opening reinforces this. She hit on air force guys. She’s not going to just be giggly and awkward. Jing may not be the most complex charcter but she’s better than this. Aside from the baffling Kathy Lee Gifford gag, this is the only thing I really don’t like abotu the story, and it lasts two pages before it’s resolved and in a 22 or so page story, that’s a good chunk of it spent on something that isn’t funny and that’s out of character even within story. That being said it dosen’t drag the story down entirely, still a good story. Just a bit uneven is all.

But unsurprisingly Tashi escapes her earlier imprisonment offscreen to let Jing know not only the full extent of Bliz Whiz’s machenations, i.e. that the other coaches are in on it, but that the hockey player is really just one of Bliz’s minons uner a glamour. WIth that knowledge Jing asks why she’d help and Tashi shows her inner honor beneath the whole rival deal, pointing out she wants to win from a GOOD team next year. With the jig up Jing pulvirzes her former crush, claims to have been under a spell (no one byes it) and the elves clean house and win. Super fuckin shooter. As for Bliz Whiz he tries to steal the trophy but instead gets booted into the snow leopards box, phrasing... it doesn’t end well for him.

And yeah while he comes back eventually, some how, apparently, for most of the stories after this he’s just.. dead. He was killed and then his remains eaten. MERRY CHRISTMAS!

But Jing admits she had fun, she and her dad bond and we get one last gag as he assumes she learned not to showboat only for her to block everyone else in the team photo. Falalallal we’re out.

Final Thoughts: As I said, one of my faviorites. It’s really well paced, has a good premise and only one part drags at all and only that part and one gag really don’t land. The rest of it is really funny, nice and touching, and overall a nice shakeup from these stories usual pattern of “Jing getting into hyjinks”. While she DOES here, her and her dad are literally and figuartvely on the same team, and she does show a sweeter side genuinely bonding with her dad and it’s nice to see them actually enjoy each other’s company for once. It’s a nice change of pace and one I wish more of the stories had. I’m not saying they all have to be holly jolly but i’d be nice if more of them had a bit of heart to them is all. Tis the season and all that. Still for what it is, it’s a fun ride and I highly recommend it. We’ll probably see her again sometime this season but that’s a bit off. For now coming up I have some ducktales to tell, a chapter in a man’s life story that’s long overdue, a holiday mess I wish I didn’t have to clean up, and in the distant future.. an old friend to reconnect with. Until then if you liked this review reblog it, comment etc all that good stuff, and you can send me asks with suggestions fo ra review or direct message me, or ask for my discord, to comission a review yourself. Until then, happy holidays.

#jingle belle #paul dini #comics #comic reviews #santa claus #christmas #hockey #letterkenny #snoopy #opus #blizzard wizard #tashi ounce

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3starsquinn · 4 years ago

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Lazy Afternoons || Orion & Winn

Timing: June 3rd (Don’t @ us)

Parties: Orion & Winn ( @packsbeforesnacks )

Location: The Commons

Summary: Winn and Rio meet up to discuss Winn’s disappearance and Winn’s memory loss.

Mixed feelings. That was the only way that Orion knew how to describe what he was feeling as he sat, legs crossed, his feet tucked under them. He had picked a random spot on the grass, his bookbag next to him and filled to the top with books. He had agreed to help Winn. That was what Scribes were supposed to do right? He had questions about werewolves and Scribes were meant to collect and impart knowledge. But that didn’t really answer the question about Winn. Was he angry? He didn’t know enough about the situation to hold a grudge. But he didn’t know how else to feel. Hurt? Scared? Those feelings were both way too complicated. Anger was easier. But his dad being with him made things even more complicated. Maybe. Rio didn’t know how to feel anymore. But there wasn’t much time to dwell on it now. His hearing picked up on Winn’s voice from across the large field. Rio jumped up, spinning around to face Winn and who he assumed was his dad crossing the field to meet them. Awkwardly, and against his better judgement, Rio smiled and waved at the two.

The way to campus wasn’t awkward, per se. Sure, his dad had requested to meet his friend fairly out of nowhere, but Winn didn’t begrudge the man for wanting to be involved in his life. (Even if it was, like, a little weird.) But his dad hadn’t told him why he wanted to meet Rio, beyond some bull about wanting to meet a fellow researcher. There’d been a weird look on his face when he’d said that, like he knew somethin’ about Rio that Winn didn’t. And Winn didn’t… well, he didn’t love that? But he’d made a compromise with Dad. Winn would let him tag along and meet Rio, but only if his dad gave them some time to hash things out alone. His dad was happy to go antagonize his future bosses (and walk Denny through campus). As they approached Rio, Winn tossed a blanket his way. “Hey, help me spread it out. I brought grub.” Winn wasn’t above bribery, so had stopped and gotten Rio some fast food, the same order, exactly, as when they’d been on their way to the retreat-that-wasn’t. And who didn’t love a spring afternoon, lazin’ about on a blanket? He’d almost brought a frisbee, but he figured that would kill the vaguely serious vibe. Winn could only hope this conversation went as halfway decently as the others had. Rio didn’t seem the punchin’ type, at least. Denny sniffed at Rio, and Winn remembered that Rio technically hadn’t been introduced properly to his dog. “Oh, Rio, meet Denny. Denny, it’s not nice to sniff new friends without askin’.” The dog looked at him, then immediately back to Rio — an eye roll in dog language, Winn was pretty sure. “And Rio Quinn meet…”

“Daniel Woods,” Daniel said, holding out his hand to Orion for a shake. “Winn has asked that I,” he held up his fingers, doing air quotes as his students had taught him, “buzz off and let you two talk for a while. Please do go easy on him.” He laughed, tugging on Denny’s leash. “Let’s go, Mister Deniability. I am sure Dean Skaro would love to meet you.” Oh, how Daniel despised that man.

Orion huffed and crossed his arms when he saw that Winn was carrying a bag of food with him across the courtyard. Was this some sort of peace offering? “You can’t just bring food and expect me to— Is that a milkshake too?” Rio squinted his eyes but softened for a moment as he considered the bribe. Eventually, he exhaled the breath that he had apparently been holding and his arms fell to his side. Soon, he completely gave in and bent down to help spread out the blanket. His attempts were thwarted by the dog, but Rio didn’t mind. He held his hand out gingerly, allowing Denny time to get adjusted to the new face before jumping in to try to pet him.

Rio shook the man’s hand, smiling widely and trying to ignore any of the awkward tension, if it could even be called that, between himself and Winn. “Such a pleasure to meet you, sir! I’m super excited to have you join the staff at the college. I’ll make sure that Winn lets me know once you have classes that I can take a look at.” If nothing else, it was always positive to meet another person that was passionate about their academics and learning. Rio knew nothing about the man’s specialty, but he respected him even if he wouldn’t be taking any of his classes.

Eventually, Daniel led the dog away and suddenly Rio was left with just Winn and the food he had brought along. Rio avoided talking as long as he could be shoveling food in his mouth and then taking the longest possible drink from his milkshake whenever he finished chewing. But the food would run out eventually. And if he knew Winn at all, he wasn’t going to go anywhere. “So. You’re back in town obviously. Where did you go?”

The knots in Winn’s stomach hadn’t loosened, even after explainin’ himself over and over again, so he figured food wasn’t an amazin’ idea for him right now. While Rio ate, and super obviously avoided talking, Winn sipped at a sorry excuse for sweet tea. Least it wasn’t raspberry. Every ‘sweet’ tea Winn had tried for the first few months had been fuckin’ raspberry. Northerners. You can drink sugar, you just gotta pretend like it’s healthy. Naw, admit that shit. Be honest. Speakin’ of…

“Look, I wasn’t lyin’ about everythin’ that happened. I mean, not the basics. A lot of it was a big misunderstandin’, and I didn’t even know y’all thought I was gone until Noah popped me one square on my jaw.” A sip of tea. “You haven’t known me that long, but I really hate lyin’, if I can avoid it. So, um, my name is… well, was Winthrop Linton Zhou. Dad used to be the English department chair down at Georgetown. Mom was in Congress. I, um… some bad shit went down with a Hunter — the kind we both hate — and from there shit gets… blurry. Literally. I wish I could tell you why I was in White Crest, but some shit’s been goin’ on recently, some people suggestin’ maybe I don’t know who I am. And I… Well, I figured the quickest way to remind myself of who I am was to go and talk to the folks who knew me best. Dad. And, uh, my ex-boyfriend-slash-packmate.”

“I didn’t mean to be gone for more than a couple of days, but my dad is a, uh, huxian? Or, shit, what do the Japenese legends call them… kitsune? Foxes. Apparently, when a huxian has a kid with a human, it’s a bit of a coinflip on whether or not the kid comes out human. I got the human end of the coin, so my dad kept my nose out of the supernatural side of the world until… well, until I found it myself. But shit went down, I only found out Dad was, again, literally a fox, last week.” Okay, yeah, naw, Winn couldn’t do this sitting up. He flopped down into the space next to Rio, head resting against Rio’s thigh. “But, um, Dad suggested maybe I’d lost my memory? Or… had it taken? Wanted to rule out, um, wolf-causes before I went after… other causes. And when I asked you, I mean, I thought there was no way it was anything other than some wolf shit. Now, I don’t really know.” He scrubbed at his eyes with the palms of his hands. “So, um. What’s new with you? Likin’ the hair color.” Winn winked up at Rio.

Orion sat patiently, silently while listening to Winn’s timeline. At first it just sounded… like an excuse. Rio had heard enough of them. He remembered all the rushed excuses as to why they had to rush away from Rio if they had gotten stuck in a conversation after Athena was gone. Rio wanted to believe that he had changed since high school. Grown in some way. Enough to be unbothered by people who showed little interest in him or at least enough to know that he was worth more than that. But maybe nothing had changed at all.

But his story started to get way more specific. And way more personal. There was a lot to unpack here. The ex boyfriend, the powerful parents. Some past history with a hunter. His father was a Kitsune? The father that Rio had just casually introduced himself to? Immediately, Rio had to wonder how old the man was. How many pieces of the history that Rio studied so passionately had he been a part of? Rio had so many questions. And Rio needed to remind himself that none of them were important right now given the rest of Winn’s- Winthrop’s?? Story. “Your name is Winthrop?” Rio blurted out, for some reason, that being a key element sticking out in the story, “Sorry- that is the last thing that’s important right now. Ignore me.”

What was important right now? Winn ran through the timeline so quickly that he wasn’t sure what to ask. Or if he should ask. Winn had been intentionally vague about the hunter story? Was it Rio’s business to ask questions? To pry into that portion of his life. Something important enough to lead into another series of unfortunate events that ended up with him in White Crest of all places.

He figured that was for another time when Winn dove back into the source of their original plans. The memory loss. And its connection to being a wolf for a long period of time. Rio still wasn’t sure what he thought. He felt emotional. From the anger that he felt prior to Winn getting here to the confusion he felt hearing Winn spill his guts to him. Rio was just confused. “I uh- well I don’t know. For sure. Memory loss spells exist. I don’t know much about them though. Aside from that, I don’t think we can discount the idea that it is caused by being a wolf for a prolonged period of time. We have no idea how animals perceive time. It’s arguable that spending so long in that form could alter one’s sense of time or self.” He tapped his fingers against the bookbag, not yet pulling any of the books out but trying to pull some of the information from them through some unknown form of osmosis.

“Me? Uh- pretty boring stuff. I sleep like maybe two hours a night if I sleep at all. Been studying some ancient demon language to try to research the creepy cult that showed up in town for the squid. Did a blood ritual that gave me a creepy third eye in my hand that sometimes opens and gives me visions of chained demons. Oh! And I dyed my hair pink. So thanks.” He tried answering as nonchalantly as possible. He didn’t want to give too much detail. He was upset that he believed Winn’s excuse. If it was all some lie, Rio was as gullible as ever. If it was the truth, then why did Rio still feel so hurt?

“Um, was?” Winn tried. “Couple extra days down south to get it all changed, but it’s not my name anymore.” He left that hanging in the air, hoping Rio would drop it. It wasn’t important and, unlike Blanche or Noah, Winn knew Rio wouldn’t bring it up unless it was relevant. And, given it would never be relevant again, he figured he’d be safe. “It’s fine. I’m not going to ignore you, man, not even if you beg. Um, if you have any… questions, we can, like. I’m tryin’ to be more honest, so, like… Hit me.” He was tired of telling this story, sure, but there were things that Rio didn’t know about him. And whether or not the younger man ‘deserved’ to know them, Winn wanted this to be a space where Rio felt like he could, at least, ask.

“There’s, um, another thing. I haven’t… told anyone this, but I took wolfsbane for a while. Months. It was… laced with something. Honestly, couldn’t tell you what, and I doubt it’s in my system after all of these years. It— I thought I had stopped taking it around the time the… gap starts, but… Well, I don’t know much about wolfsbane, don’t know much about drugs, but I’ve also never met another wolf who took it for that long, who took it when it wasn’t the Moon.” He sighed, covering his eyes with his hands. The sun wasn’t that bright — well, and they’d be due for another blink soon — but Winn could feel a headache blooming in the back of his head.

“I appreciate you bein’ honest, man. It’s… Well, it’s fine to not know somethin’, even if it makes this all a bit… harder, for me to accept. There’s, uh, this guy. Says he knew me, but I’ve never seen him. We kinda… had it out. I don’t like bein’ told who I am, and I freaked out a bit, and… Anyway, my ex told me that he remembered a man whose name started with an S. So, I… Could something carve out so much time? And what happens if I get those memories back?” He took in a breath, trying to keep the slow creep of anxiety at bay. “I’m scared, Rio. Scared of what could have happened to do something to me like that. And if I did it myself, I mean— There’s just so much I don’t fucking know.”

He laughed, already more exhausted from this conversation than he’d been all week. Not that that was Rio’s fault. “I don’t mean to keep dumpin’ on you, man. You’ve got your own shit, and I’m… Christ, I’m bein’ a really bad friend right now, huh?” Winn leaned up from his place on Rio’s leg, and smiled sadly. “Demons. I— Man, I know you want to help, but it fucking sucks that you’re probably one of our only hopes. You don’t deserve this shit. I mean, none of us do, but you…” Winn looked at the sun, well, the eyeball, as it blinked slowly, and the lights went out. “Not to get all deep in the dark here, Rio, but do you ever wonder, like, why us? I mean, I know I chose to become a wolf, but I didn’t… I didn’t choose to be hated and feared. You didn’t choose to be born with the gene, but you did choose to help, but why… Why should we even have this shit around to help with?”

“I’m sorry,” Winn said, after a moment. “Really, truly, I am. I took for granted that people wouldn’t… care. If I left. And, fuck, I can’t even look you in the eyes and say I wouldn’t have done somethin’ like y’all thought I did. I didn’t, but I might’ve. Which is shitty. I told y’all, I told you, that we were friends. And I thought… I don’t know. I thought y’all didn’t care as much as I did. And, like, I’m not tryin’ to put words in your mouth, or give you a sob story. That ain’t the point. I just… figured no one would be hurt, whenever I had to leave. I was wrong. And— Shit, I just want you to know that I care about you, Orion. And I want to stick around, ‘cause y’all make my life better. I was… I was in a bad place when I came to White Crest. I’m not in a perfect place now. But I want to be here, for whatever… for whatever that’s worth. So long as y’all will have me.” And then, the sun came back, and Winn winced. Monologuing in the dark. Very chill Winner.

This was all way too much for Orion to handle right now. He had too much going on. Stressing over this just took his attention away from the plethora of other things that Rio had to stress over at the moment. But Winn was trying. He was really trying. He was rambling. Giving more information than Rio knew what to do with. His name was legally Winn now. Which seemed significant, though Winn didn’t seem too apt to talk about it. And Winn seemed open to any questions. Rio felt too tired to even ask questions right now. Especially when he felt there was still so much he didn’t know. He pushed the offer to the back of his mind for a moment. He’d circle back around to that.

Thinking about an actual assignment helped to ground Rio. He could think better when he was thinking as a researcher than something else. The idea of trying to help Winn with his research was pretty much the only thing that had convinced Rio to actually meet Winn out here. “Not knowing something actually really stresses me out so…” Rio let the sentence fade out, pausing to take a drawn out drink from his milkshake. “This just reminds me of all the other stuff I don’t actually know about.” Winn was missing information. Rio knew about Wolfsbane, knew it’s intended effects. But hadn’t known that wolves took it… recreationally? It must be like some kind of drug. “It depends on the source. If the memories were magically taken then arguably they could be magically restored. Probably.” Not that Rio was any expert on magic. “But- I mean it could be something completely mundane too. Maybe they’re repressed memories. Something your brain blocked out as some sort of defense mechanism. Did you ask your ex? Or do you know that other guy that could help fill in the blanks? Maybe if you start hearing them it will jog some sort of memory?” It was definitely more of a theory than anything Rio was confident about. He wasn’t a doctor though. He definitely wasn’t qualified to talk about this.

Rio wanted to laugh with Winn regarding the ridiculousness of the town, but when he tried it came out as more of a choked sob than anything else. “I’ve been asking that same question since… I don’t know. Probably like ten-ish? I’ve known about the supernatural for a long time. Practically my whole life. But I didn’t understand what I was at first. I like learning about others. I didn’t realize I was learning how to become a killer.” Rio couldn’t remember the moment that he had his epiphany. But it was harder to remember a time where he didn’t feel that way.

“Well… we do care.” Rio crossed his arms. There were things he wanted to say. So many doubts that filled his head that he needed answers for. If only he wasn’t too afraid to say them. Or maybe… maybe he should just say them. “Look, I- I just want to know-” Rio paused again. He didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know how to be confrontational. “I need to say stuff but I can’t say it with you looking at me so…” Rio looked at him, motioning silently for him to turn away before he finally resorted to pleaing, “Please?” When Winn wasn’t looking at him anymore, Rio followed suit and stared at the ground, focusing on counting blades of grass as he spoke. “I didn’t have any real friends growing up. I guess my sister was one of the few. I don’t even know if we were friends or not. But she did care about me. And she tried to get others to like me. She was popular. I wasn’t. The first couple years she tried to pull me into the popular group. Her friends were nice to me. Nice enough. Until she wasn’t with us to supervise. What I’m saying is- I’ve spent my whole life with pity friends. And I don’t need those. I don’t want those in my life anymore. But I can’t figure out who actually wants to be my friend and who just feels bad for the nerdy, quiet kid with social anxiety. So- if that’s what this is. I don’t care, okay? No hard feelings. We can just cut out losses and go. Because I have a lot going on and I don’t have the emotional capacity for it.” Rio realized he was gasping for breath once he was finally done talking. At first he thought that it was from rambling, but he realized quickly that he was hyperventilating. It felt like the onset of a panic attack, but Rio was keeping things surprisingly under control. He just needed to try to keep it that way.

Winn laughed, short, almost a bark. “You’re telling me... I don’t even know what I don’t know. César — the ex — doesn’t know much. Just when I stopped talking to him.” A frown, considering Rio’s story about being a Hunter. He felt for the younger man, truly. “I can’t imagine what that was like — having your curiosity taken advantage of like that.”

But Rio didn’t linger long on his past as a child of killing machines. No, instead, surprisingly, he pivoted to his own feelings. Winn would be proud, if not for the way his heart broke in two as Rio described so-called pity friends. And then he was proud, so proud, because Rio was asking him, point-blank, where they stood. Sticking up for himself. Winn wanted to hug Rio. He would. Winn turned back towards the younger, wrapping him up from behind in the biggest embrace he could manage, trying to pour the truth of his friendship, of his affection for Rio, into the squeeze. “Dude,” he said, firmly. “I would never do that to you. I like you ‘cause you’re smart, compassionate, and pet me on the scruff if I ask nice. We are friends. I swear. Maybe not close friends, not yet, but I don’t... I’m choosier than you’d think, about those I let into my life. And I want you here, if you want to be here. Of course I do.” He gave Rio another squeeze for good measure, and held it there for a moment, giving the other man a moment to compose himself.

Orion sighed, wishing that he had something, anything more that he could offer to Winn. But for now, Rio had nothing else to give. He could do some more deep diving. It didn’t make sense that Winn was the first this had ever happened to. It couldn’t have. There had to be an explanation. Rio just had to find it. “Sorry. It must be really frustrating. Losing chunks of time like this.”

Rio couldn’t believe he had actually built up the courage to lay it out like that. He could only have his friends to thank for this newfound courage. And he wasn’t sure what he expected. Nobody wanted to admit that they were just hanging out with someone out of pity, but Rio hoped that given the circumstance and how honest Rio had just been with Winn that Winn would afford the same honestly. What he hadn’t expected was to be hugged. Rio went still immediately from the surprise. Affection always took Rio off guard, but it wasn’t an unpleasant feeling. Rio had come to find that in certain situations he actually enjoyed being hugged. By the right people.

Rio really wasn’t expecting for Winn to go into detail on why he liked him. Rio was happy to get an honest answer, but all the spotlight and attention on Rio made him beet red. Maybe he shouldn’t have asked in such a public park, where prying eyes could make Rio feel even more uncomfortable and seen. All he wanted was to be invisible. “Oh. Wow. Well, that was super honest. So, uh, thanks… for being my friend?” He was fumbling through words now, unsure how to respond. When Winn unwrapped the hug, Rio sat back on the blanket and pulled his legs up into what looked like a fetal position. “So, uh— research was sort of a bust this time around. But I brought some extra books with me that we could start looking into? After I finish the rest of my food.” He dug into his bookbag for the tools he was using to change the subject. Maybe Rio was still a bit hurt, but it was at least good to know that Winn was an actual friend.

#wickedswriting #c: winn #chatzy: winn #chatzy #Lazy Afternoons

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fanpom-imagines · 5 years ago

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Request by Anonymous: Can you do Jon snow x reader where she is his wife and she found out he cheated on her with Daenerys after they come back to Winterfell and Jon begin cold but regret it can the reader be queen of powerful kingdom that nice loyal kind. to people treat bastard as their equal and have the most powerful army in the seven kingdom and can you make also reader a warrior queen who is decent from the old gods half human half god and Aegon never conquered it because how powerful her ancestors were and (1) And can you make also make were the reader who is Jon wife a queen of powerful kingdom were they treat people equal even Bastard and reader find out Jon cheated on her with Daenerys and the reader is descend of the old gods half human half god and have armor and fight like wonder women and is respected and fear and can control the four Elements and have magic like scarlet witch from avengers her family is called the children of gods since they are half human half god (2)

Imagine finding out about Jon’s affair with Daenerys whilst also being a powerful Queen yourself.

Masterlist

Fandom: Game of Thrones

Words: 2358

Warnings: use of vulgar language and damn was this a long request, but I kind of changed some stuff in the fanfic, but it’s mostly accurate to what you had requested

Gifs aren’t mine.

(Female Reader)

I stared straight ahead and glared at the queen who gave a smile towards Sansa who approached her and Jon. My guts turned at Sansa’s next words, “Winterfell is yours, Your Grace.”

After the two women exchanged words and strained smiles Daenerys made her way to me, “You must be Jon Snow’s wife? One of those who is a descendant of gods, if I’m not mistaken?” She asked me with a bright smile having no idea of my knowledge of the affair between her and my husband.

Forcing down any comments that could have her whole army against me as well as her dragons I just smiled politely before answering in a kind tone, “You are not mistaken, I am of god blood.”

“Is it true of what they say of your people? That the ones with the god blood flowing through their veins have powers. I had heard stories as a child, but I deemed them as rumors,” She told me as she looked at me curiously.

In that moment I wanted to show her how exactly my powers worked. I could have choked the life out of her or snapped her neck without even batting and eyelash, yet she was needed for the battle to come. So really I had no other choice, but to nod my head and say, “Yes, it is in fact true.”

Without another word we both bid the other farewell as Jon pulled her aside by the waist to introduce her to other members of the Stark family as well as other important people of the North. My fists clenched as I saw Jon’s arm around the woman’s waist. I scoffed inwardly at the sight before looking around and seeing the suspicious and hostile gazes of the Northerners towards Daenerys. I guess I am not the only one who doesn’t trust the self proclaimed Queen of the Seven Kingdoms.

~~~

“What the hell is your problem Jon Snow?!” I screamed out at my husband who looked shamefully down at the ground refusing to make eye contact with me.

“First I hear you bend the knee to some Targaryen Queen and now I hear who have committed adultery with her?!” I scoffed at him.

“I thought you were a man of honor Jon, a true Northerner. Yet, I find out your just like all the other King’s of Westeros,” I shake my head at him and sit down onto one of the chairs next to a small table placed next to the window which showed the breathtaking view of the cold Northern world.

“(Y/N), I’m sorry I never meant-” Jon started out, but I cut him off already knowing none of his poor excuses and explanations could ever put him in the right light.

“Never meant to what? Hurt me? Or for me to find out?” I snapped at him venomously.

“(Y/N) calm down,” Jon started as he made his way closer to me.

“Calm down? Calm down?! You want me to fucking calm down?! I have a right to be furious with you Snow! You threw away your crown for an alliance you had to gain through whoring yourself to a Queen whose desire is a kingdom and a throne she has never even seen before!” I screamed out at him getting up from my seat and closer to him.

“(Y/N) I…” I waited for him to say something, anything, but he and I both knew there was nothing that could make this right.

“I hate you, Jon Snow,” I whispered out as tears welled up in my eyes and cascaded down my face. I turned away from him and pulled out a large trunk from under the bed before opening it and placing my things inside.

“(Y/N), what are you doing?” Jon asked panicked as he got closer to me I quickly turned to him before he could touch me.

“Don’t fucking touch me Snow,” Jon cringed at the name I used. I knew full well that here in Westeros people did not believe bastards to be of any worth and gave them names to alienate them even further, unlike where I am from. In my kingdom people do not care about one’s lineage, color, or gender, rather we measure value by a person’s actions. I had deemed Jon an amazing man and truthful king, yet it seems I was deceived. In my kingdom, man or woman, a person would be punished for adultery, but here in Westeros only the women are. If a woman is caught with another man in her bed she is sent to be killed, but a man can fuck as many women as he wants and he’s worshipped and applauded. This is why I hate this kingdom. Though my lands are connected to Westeros we have never identified with them and have pushed back all forces and attempts at their invasion.

I came into these lands with these people’s foreign customs and ways for a man I fell in love with and who I thought he had loved me back, but it seems he does not love me any longer or perhaps he never loved me at all. I push past Jon as I call upon two of my guards to come and help me move my belongings out of the room.

“(Y/N) please don’t,” Jon pleaded as he ran after me and pulled me back by the hand to face him. He pressed a kiss to my lips, but I pushed him away as soon as our lips touched. The utter hurt that washed over his face sent a pang of guilt into my chest, but it faded as quickly as it came.

“I will stay to fight the Whitewalkers which means I will have to stay in the same castle as you, but I will not share a bed with you ever again. Our alliance will be cut off after the battle as my kingdom does not want to meddle in the affairs of the seven kingdoms. I do not want to play this stupid game of thrones these people have been playing for the past decade. I will call for a council to arrange and witness our divorce. I will not live and bare the children of a man who can’t put his people and wife before his own cock,” and with that I turned away from him and walked away and thought pain and regret creeped from my heart and seemed to want to crawl out my throat into a desperate cry I swallowed it down and made my way to my new chambers far away from his.

~~~

The next day I got ready and brushed out my hair and had it done up in my people’s traditional style rather than the bland Northern style I’ve had it since becoming Jon’s wife. I thanked the maid who helped me style it before getting into my clothes and asking the maid for some help with them at some difficult parts of my attire. I made my way downstairs once again towards the large room where Jon, Sansa, and the Targaryen queen sat at the large wooden table at the end of the room. I felt anger bubble in my chest as I saw Daenerys sit in my place at the table.

As I stood in front of the council Ser Daavos stood up and walked forward to address me, “Your Grace, I know you have made up your mind with severing your marriage vows to Jon, but I should advise against it. The people of the Seven Kingdoms will not take lightly to it as it is not seen as right as the two of you had taken your vows in front of the Old and New gods. This will also sever ties and alliances between the Seven Kingdoms and the Kingdom of Ainu severely.”

“Ser Daavos you are not my advisor, though you are a wise man and do what is best for your people and kingdom I do not give a single shit about your peoples thoughts or needs. I never swore to serve them only that I would stay true and faithful to my husband who also swore the same vow. Yet, he disobeyed and broke his vow and chose to sleep with a Targaryen queen. Ironically the Nights Watch would’ve hung him for breaking a vow, but I guess vows mean nothing when your a king, or well used to be one.” I said venomously all the while glaring at Jon and keeping eye contact with him as he gave me pained eyes.

“I’m sorry, but your husband and I never had such an affair with one another,” Daenerys said as she looked at me with an offended look.

“No I’m sorry that you actually think lying about something will make it nonexistent and make it disappear,” I gave her a strained smile.

“How dare you!” Daenerys yelled out as she stood up abruptly making the chair behind her make a screetching sound as it was pushed back.

“No how dare you sleep with another woman’s wife, but I guess I should thank you because if he shared a bed with you then he definitely would’ve shared a bed with someone else sooner or later. Now I’m not here to argue so sit down, I’m here to cut ties with the Stark family,” I told her as I gave her a sharp glare and cut her off before she could spit out any other remark or insulting or offended comment my way, but it seemed like she did not want to back down.

“You have no idea who you are messing with-” Once again I cut her off.

“Yes I think I do. You’re queen of many different places and have many different titles yet I do not care because you still slept with my husband and I’m not trying to fight to get him back I will not stay with a man who can not stay true to his word. I do in fact would like to finally get this divorce in order and be done for the day before I feel like silencing you. It would be a shame if you died before the battle even begun,” I told her threateningly and my last statement even came with a “sweet” smile.

“I have the blood of Old Valyria, there is dragons blood running through my veins I would advise you not to anger me,” Daenerys warned as she glared at me and puffed out her chest in pride as she straightened herself to give off a more intimidating aura. If I had been anyone else I would’ve been scared, but alas I am Queen (Y/N) of the House of Gods, Queen of the people of Arda en Ainu, (Y/N) the Honorable, Godborn, Aino Nethar, Slayer of Darkness, Light Bringer, Warrior of the People, and the Warrior of Light.

“And there is gods blood running through mine. I will not stand by as you question my actions because you deem yourself above me. We are all people and we are all will end up six feet under sooner or later. You believe yourself to be some almighty goddess yet all your power lies behind your dragons. Take away your dragons and the reason people fear you will vanish. You may have many titles Daenerys, but I have just as many. You desire a throne you’ve never seen. You desire to rule a kingdom that you barely known only because you believe it is your birthright when it is not. Robert baratheon took the throne after killing your father, King Aerys II just as your father had conquered these lands and took it from the people before him and just as the First Men had taken the lands from the children of the forest who had been there before them. You are not the heir to the throne because that is how wars work. You shouldn’t be prancing around saying it is your right because it is not. You should be telling these people that you will take it back and renew your Houses name rather than screaming it’s mine like some annoying child.” Everyone in the room froze and stared at me. I held my head high and kept eye contact with Daenerys as I could see the veins forming on her forehead.

“I am Queen Daenerys Stormborn of the House Targaryen, the First of Her Name, Queen of the Andals, the Rhoynar and the First Men, The rightful Queen of the Seven Kingdoms and Protector of the Realm, Queen of Dragonstone, Queen of Meereen, Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea, the Unburnt, Breaker of Chains and Mother of Dragons, Regent of the Realm.” Daenerys said in full confidence.

“And I am Queen (Y/N) of the House of Gods, Protector of the people of the Kingdom of Ainu, (Y/N) the Honorable, Turniqui of Arda en Ainu, Slayer of Darkness and Bearer of Light, Warrior of the People and Messenger of the Gods, Mahtar of the World of Gods, Savior to All and Foe of Many, the Godborn, Aino Nethar, The Last Light, Gift of the Ainu, and the Warrior of Light, and I will not be threatened by your pitiful attempts to do just that. My army and I will stay at Winterfell till the Whitewalkers come and the battle is done. After that Arda en Ainu will no longer have ties with the Seven Kingdoms and my people will go back to their families without your interference. We will not fight in your war to get some throne that has brought nothing, but pain and misery to the people of this realm,” My eyes started to glow red as I lifted up some of the soldiers around me who started to be surrounded by a red glowing ligt that increased my hands and I started to choke them.

“Enough!” I heard Jon yell and I immediately dropped them. “(Y/N) do not hurt these men.”

“Then let’s get this divorce over with before I do hurt these men.”

#jon snow #jon snow x reader #jon snow imagine #got imagine #got x reader #got #game of thrones #game of thrones x reader #game of thrones imagine

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starkinventor · 5 years ago

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CIS PEOPLE AND TRANS QUESTIONS:

Hey friends! In honor of pride month and thanks to @cardshcrp‘s recent faq post, I wanted to pay the cis toll and put together a list of do’s and don’ts when it comes to asking trans people about trans issues, and what questions are none of your fucking business.

Let me preface this by saying I am not a trans person, just an ally. I wanted to make this post because it’s not your token trans person’s job to explain this shit to you. It’s not their job to have to hold your hand and tell you not to make an ass out of yourself.

Note: This could have gone on forever but I wanted to try and make it as every-day user friendly as possible so I’m genuinely and sincerely sorry if I missed something.

But first - a glossary! There are some phrases that might not be familiar to you as a cis person. I’ll define them here.

Passing - Successfully being accepted as a member of a group you did not originally belong to, without question or suspicion.

Cis - Someone who identifies with the gender they were assigned at birth.

AFAB/AMAB - Assigned female at birth, assigned male at birth.

HRT - Hormone Replacement Therapy

Misgendering - Using pronouns or language to describe a person that does not reflect their identity, whether accidentally or on purpose (i.e. calling someone who identifies as a woman ‘he’).

Dysphoria - When referring to gender it is the distress someone feels when their birth-assigned sex and gender do not match their gender identity. (This can present a real, physical danger to trans individuals.)

DO:

Listen when a trans person tells you something is offensive and sincerely apologize. Ignorance is not an excuse.

DO NOT:

Say they’re being ‘overly sensitive’ or ‘it was just a joke’ or ‘I didn’t know’. If you say/do something offensive, you apologize. You do not get to decide what is/is not offensive to someone else.

DO:

Ask what a person’s pronouns are. “What pronouns do you use?” is a great way to ask.

DO NOT:

Assume you know what a person’s pronouns are based on how they look. That’s a dick move and misgendering isn’t cool. This is also applicable for people who identify as non-binary as well - being non-binary does not mean that someone goes by they/them. You must respect someone’s pronouns. Using the wrong pronouns on purpose is misgendering and it’s a dick move. You do not get to decide whether or not you agree with someone’s pronouns.

DO:

Understand that being trans does not exclusively mean someone was AFAB/AMAB and now identifies as the opposite. Non-binary and genderqueer people might consider themselves trans too as they do not identify with the sex/gender they were assigned at birth.

DO NOT:

Tell a non-binary person that they are not trans or that they are not valid. That is a dick move.

DO:

Understand that every trans person’s transition is different.

DO NOT:

Assume that every trans person will receive all surgeries or turn to HRT. There are a number of personal reasons why someone may choose not to have certain surgeries or go on hormones.

DO:

Respect that someone’s level of passing can be affected by their health, their home situation, and their specific kinds of dysphoria.

DO NOT:

Assume that just because a trans man does not bind his chest that he is not a trans man or that just because a trans woman does not wear dresses that she is not a trans woman. Someone’s home life or medical conditions could dictate how and why they transition the ways they do/don’t.

DO:

Understand that a trans man is a man and a trans woman is a woman.

DO NOT:

Fall victim to the bullshit belief that trans people need to use the same bathroom that they would have before their transition. Do not fall victim to the TERF belief that trans women are not women who face the same issues afab women do. That’s harmful to trans women who face more than enough violence on a daily basis, and it’s harmful to feminism.

DO NOT ASK:

“What surgeries have you had? What surgeries do you want to have?” It’s none of your business.

“Are you a man or a woman?” You shouldn’t ask anyone this question.

“Do you still have a dick/vagina?” This is like asking a cis woman if her tits are real. Don’t fucking do it.

“What was your name before?” Unless they give you explicit permission to use their deadname for whatever reason, this is none of your fucking business.

“Can I see what you looked like before?” No. The answer is almost always no. Unless you are handed a baby picture and told “this was me”, this is a rude question to ask.

“What bathroom do you use?” This is hella uncomfortable. It’s also a ridiculous question to ask. Someone goes to the bathroom for specific reasons and most of those reasons won’t involve your participation.

“Are you trans?” You are not entitled to this information. You are not entitled to this information. YOU ARE NOT ENTITLED TO THIS INFORMATION.

“How do you have sex?” What someone does in their bedroom with their partner(s) is none of your business unless you are a participant.

“Are you sure you’re not just gay?” Sexuality and gender are two different things and this question makes you sound like an ass. Not only does this imply that someone’s assigned gender is their “real” gender, it also makes assumptions about who they may/may not be attracted to.

“Did you know so-and-so is trans?” This is called ‘outing’ someone and can put someone in real physical danger. If someone is not out to other people, there may be a reason for that and you’ve just betrayed their trust and disclosed their identity like a dick.

IN SHORT:

Don’t be a dick. Be a decent human. If you would be uncomfortable being asked a question, maybe you shouldn’t ask someone else that question. Please don’t assume that a trans person owes you answers or anything for that matter. They carry enough emotional labor without needing to do more to satisfy your morbid curiosity.

#⌬﹝following’s not really my style﹞⌬ psa #⌬﹝do you ever shut up?﹞⌬ out of character #i'm paying the cis tax today

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marvelhead17 · 5 years ago

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Miracle (Original Female Character x Cable Fic)

Chapter 3

Word Count: 14.8k

Inspiration song: Miracle - The Score

Disclaimer: All characters mentioned except my own are owned by 20th Century Fox/Disney. All songs and lyrics described and used in this story are owned by their respective writers/producers/performers.

Warnings to cover the whole fic: Graphic depictions of violence, use of weapons, mild to strong language, mentions of rape, mentions of pregnancy and miscarriage, referenced torture and psychological abuse/manipulation, nightmares and night terrors, sexual humour, sexual content.

Author’s Note: The Italics used is this piece is sometimes in reference to Russian or foreign language used by characters. Please enjoy and let me know what you think!

“Daddy, promise you’ll come back soon?” Hope asked, wrapping her hands around his neck and hugging him as tightly as she could.

“I promise sweetheart,” he held the back of her head gently and then placed a kiss on the top of her head, he moved away and smiled at her, “I could never forget about my favourite girl.”

Her saddened face quickly turned to a grin and she kissed him on the cheek and gave him one last squeeze.

“Come on Hope, sweetheart, we need to get going,” his ex-wife said from where she stood a distance away, “Your Dad is waiting for us.” She rested one hand on her hip, while the other was placed on her extended belly.

“Coming Mommy!” she glanced at her mother and then looked back at Nathan, “He could never replace you Daddy,” Hope whispered, before running over to her mother, “I love you!” She blew him a kiss and waved her hand happily at him.

“I love you too, sweetheart!” he called out, returning the wave eagerly. His ex-wife nodded her head as a means of saying goodbye and they headed towards the door.

Hope flung her garish coloured backpack over her shoulder and her teddy bear fell out onto the floor, he quickly stood up and ran to pick it up and called out to his daughter, “Hope!”

“Mr. Hugglesworth!” she gasped and grabbed the teddy from her father, “Thank you, Daddy!” she squeezed the bear close to her chest.

“Anytime sweetheart,” he smiled down at her, brushing her hair carefully with his human hand.

“Let’s go,” her mother gestured Hope to go out the door and was about to walk out, when she stopped and turned to look at Nathan, and for a second he felt his yearning return, “Try not to get her hopes up will you?” she asked, not waiting for an answer as she closed the door.

He looked down at the floor, wishing the throbbing pain in his chest would stop, as he rested his forehead against the door. “Fuck, I miss you,” he whispered.

He clenched his hand in anger, wishing his heart would stop giving him optimism where none was needed, his eyes burned as a hot tear slid down his cheek. He took several deep breaths and tried to focus on the grain pattern in the wood of his door, but his mind wasn’t allowing him to move past the aching thoughts.

I know you’ve moved on, that you’re with him now. But I can’t stop thinking about us, even though you’re starting a new family together. I… Fuck it, I still love you, Aliya. I just wish everything would go back to how it was before, before I screwed up everything and lost it all.

He swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat and hit the door with his fist, making a large dent in the old wood, before pushing himself away and throwing himself down on the couch. He leaned over, placing his forehead on his palms and cried.

His tears fell onto the bear, causing small dark spots to start covering the light brown fluff, as he sat hunched over it on the edge of his bed he gently brushed its head. He could hear his daughter’s giggling as if she were in the room with him, and he remembered that smile she used to have when she came to visit him on the weekends, and a familiar ache burned in his chest.

Nathan squeezed the bear tightly and inhaled deeply, the faint smell of her made him feel both better and worse. He stood up and placed the bear carefully on the bedside table before he walked over to his bathroom.

He gave himself a stern look in the mirror, leaning over the sink with both hands on the side and shook his head.

Keep it together Cable. You’ll see her soon enough.

He opened the tap and let the water run for a minute before he cupped his hands and let the cool liquid fill them, he raised them to his face and smothered it with the water, and it splashed and ran down his face.

He let out a breath feeling a bit more relieved and awake, he switched the water off and dried his face and then went back to his room to change into his regular clothing. It had been barely a week after he had been captured and tortured, and he found that sometimes the pain would creep up on him just doing basic things, but he refused to admit it anyway, believing that he deserved it.

Once he was done he made his way downstairs to the kitchen, and nearly hesitated to go in when he saw Hayden seated on one of the high chairs in the breakfast nook, she was scrolling through her phone idly.

“Sup?” She greeted.

Nathan only nodded and gathered the ingredients for his protein shake from the fridge, after putting everything in the blender he couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable as if someone was watching him, and he turned to see Hayden staring at him with a frown, “What?”

“Something’s wrong. What is it?”

“Nothin’s wrong.” He said too quickly and he knew it from the raise of her brow.

“Ah, something’s definitely wrong. Firstly, you normally grunt a half-decent ‘mornin’ when I greet you; and secondly, you put three whole eggs, shell and all, in your shake,” she pointed.

He hurriedly turned the machine off as it made a high pitch noise, and picked up the blender to examine the contents, crushed eggs shells were mixed throughout. He sighed and put the blender down on the counter, “So what? I’m tired, that’s all.”

“That’s a shit excuse and you know it,”

“What do you want from me, huh?” he slammed his hands on the counter angrily.

“What I want,” she slammed her hands down on the counter and leaned closer to his face, “Is for my team members to be on some level of okay, and clearly you’re not.” He huffed through his nose, knowing she wasn’t going to drop it unless he told her.

He stepped back and licked his mouth, avoiding eye contact, “I miss my little girl... Alright? Is that what you wanna hear? I just want to go back, see her, hear her, and hold her, just one more time. I never got to say goodbye,” he slowly raised his head, “I didn’t think I’d have to say goodbye,”

She sat back on her chair, taken back, “Oh.”

“And besides the fact that I used up the last of my fuel, I can’t find the damned thing. I had it in my drawer when I first arrived and it’s been missing since the day after,”

“Missing… Wait a minute,” her eyes widened and she stood up, looking up at the stairs, “Wade!” Nathan stepped back from the unexpected yelling and frowned heavily. “Wade, get your ass here now!”

“Jesus, do you have to yell?” He covered his ears irritably.

“Whassup?” Wade bounded into the room eagerly.

“A few weeks ago, when you told me that you went back in time to try and kill baby Hitler… That wasn’t a hallucination of yours, was it?” she asked, giving him a suspicious look as she crossed her arms.

“Uh-” he paused when he realised that Nathan was also in the room, and then it flickered back to her nervously, “I’ll tell you everything you need to know. I’m more scared of you than Nathan,”

“Excuse me?” he asked, looking insulted.

“Wade fucking Wilson-” she shoved him firmly, “Not only did you steal a time travelling device, but you somehow got it fixed and didn’t fucking give it back?”

“Oh fuck,” Wade squeaked, his eyes widening as he took a step back.

He froze. I can go back and see my Hope again. He smiled to himself.

“Fuck is right mister,” she rolled up her jacket, grabbing him by his shirt collar and lifted him off the ground, her eyes not even changing a shade as she glared at him. “Now where is it, before I fuck you up worse than you could imagine.”

“It’s in my room, please don’t hurt me or my dick I need that!” he raised his hands in a panic.

She lowered him to the floor, before grabbing his neck in her hand and choking him hard. She spoke to him softly, “If you ever get in the way of that man being able to see his daughter again, I’m going to do more than this, got it?”

Wade barely managed to choke out a ‘yes’ as he clung onto her hand in some attempt to loosen the grip on his neck, she released him and he gasped for air desperately. Nathan cocked his head wondering why she was going to such lengths for him; but he dismissed the thought just as quickly and walked over to the two.

“Where?”

“It’s best that I bring it, there’s a lot of… Stuff in my room,”

“Thirty seconds, Wilson,” Hayden said as she looked down at her watch, “Twenty-nine-”

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!” Wade ran up the stairs, tripping several times before he actually disappeared out of their sight.

“Not that I don’t appreciate your help, but why?”

“If I could go back to see my mom, I’d do it in a heartbeat,” she paused as Nathan raised a brow but she shook her head, “Wade, you have exactly five seconds to-!”

“I’m here, fuck me,” Wade ran to them and fell to his knees panting heavily, he propped himself on one knee and held the device proposal style to Nathan.

“Wade, don’t do what I think you’re-”

“Cable, will you time travel with me?” he asked, she let out a breath and pinched the bridge of her nose.

“I hate you,” she muttered.

“That’s the last thing I’d ever fucking do,” Nathan grabbed the device and shoved Wade’s shoulder so that he toppled over onto the floor, he looked over the device, “How’d you fix it?” he asked.

“Ask Ellen the Teenage Warhead,” Wade shrugged as he stood up, “As for baby Hitler, he ended up having a diaper change, funny story I was actually going to call Cable since he was so keen on killing Russel, I thought this would be like taking candy from a baby, if that means replacing it with a bullet that is,” They both stared at him. “What? It’s the truth!”

“You wanted to murder baby Hitler?” Hayden asked. “Wade you’re such an idiot, you know that? Changing history like that could make it worse, what if someone worse than him- you know what I’m wasting my breath,” she raised a hand and took a deep breath, closing her eyes for a moment

“Now that’s the truth,” he said as he examined the device, a smile worked its way to his face.

“Holy shit, Cable you’re smiling?” Wade’s jaw dropped. “Quick, someone take a picture!”

“Funny asshole, say it again and I’ll show you a real smile,” he raised his fist.

“Aha… I’m good,” Wade laughed nervously, taking a few steps back and then running away as quickly as he could.

Nathan placed the device in the compartment on his arm, before tuning it he paused.

“What’s wrong?”

“I don’t know what I’m gonna do when I get there, what the hell am I gonna say?” He lowered his arm.

“For starters you remind your daughter that you love her, and then, take her out just the two of you and do something together, I guess,” she shrugged.

“What the hell do kids even like to do?”

“You’re really asking the wrong person here Cable,” she shook her head, his shoulders dropped and she thought hard for a moment, “Oh, I have an idea, I heard there’s a carnival in town, maybe you can take her there?”

“Carnival? Those are travelling, fun-fair things right?”

“Well yeah, what, don’t you have them in the future?”

“‘Fun’ isn’t exactly a priority in the future,”

“Really?” she asked surprised and he nodded, “Then you really should bring her, give her a proper childhood experience.”

“You think she’d like that?”

“Trust me, she’ll love it. Besides, does it really matter if you get to spend time with her?”

“I suppose you’re right,” he nodded as he continued tuning the device.

“Of course I’m right,”

“Appreciate it, wish me luck,” he smacked his hand down, flashing into a ball of light and disappearing before she could say anything.

Nathan knocked on the door to the house, wondering if his ex would actually open for him, when it did he was greeted by her new husband.

“Oh Nathan, good to see you,” he attempted a smile and Nathan cleared his throat.

“Uh yeah, likewise,” he nodded and walked into the house, “I’m here for Hope-”

“Daddy!” Hope leapt into his arms and he hugged her so tightly that she squirmed and giggled, “Daddy you’re squeezing me too tight!” He let her go slightly and kissed her several times on the head.

“Sorry sweetheart, I just missed you, a whole lot,”

“I missed you too, Daddy,” she let go and he did as well, rather reluctantly.

“I’m just going to talk to your mom real quick sweetheart, don’t you go anywhere, alright?” he smiled and brushed her hair from her face.

“Alright Daddy,” she grinned and watched as Nathan walked away to her mother standing a few feet away, an infant wrapped in a blanket rested in her arms.

For a moment he was taken back, but he remembered what he was here for and spoke to her, “I’m taking her out so don’t you try come back and insist that there’s something important with you and Chet so that you can take her, this is my weekend with her and I intend to spend every minute I can with her,” he said with an air of confidence that he didn’t know he had.

“Nathan you can’t just-”

“She’s my daughter too, I have the right to see her,” he strode over to his daughter and scooped her into his metal arm and grabbed her packed bags with the other.

“Yay weekend with Daddy!” she cheered, he smiled as he flung the bags over his shoulder and opened the door before slamming it behind him.

Hayden paged through one of the ‘Guns and Ammo’ magazines that Nathan had left in the kitchen, she sat up, feeling that something was about to happen when a loud pop sounded and a flash of light temporarily flared just ahead of her.

“Jesus Christ.” Hayden placed her hand on her chest as Nathan popped into the room unexpectedly with a small girl and bags in his arms.

“Hope, this is my friend Hades,” he said as he lowered her to the floor carefully.

She stared up at Hayden with excitement, “That’s such a cool name! My Daddy told me you’re taking us to a carnival, we heard about them in school, are they really fun?”

“Um…” she looked dumbfounded as she stared at Hope.

“Hope, sweetheart, why don’t you go have a seat over there for me?” he pointed to the couches, “I’ll join you in a minute,”

“Okay Daddy,” she bounded off and hopped onto the nearest couch, looking around at the rest of the room curiously.

“Wow, a kid. She’s, uh, yours,” she stood up, looking at her perplexedly.

“She’s beautiful isn’t she?” he smiled.

“Uh- yeah, yeah. Me taking you, carnival?” she asked stupidly, looking between him and his daughter in confusion.

“Yeah- about that, I meant to ask if you could join us before I left. I’ve no idea what carnivals are like, and having someone more socially adept around will make things a whole lot easier for me,” he said sheepishly while rubbing the back of his neck.

“I- well,” she shook her head, “Yeah, yeah I’d love to, except I’m not that good with people,” she admitted.

“Great,” Nathan smiled again, “Well, you’re probably better than I am by a long shot,”

“Maybe,” she nodded, “I have one condition though, I’m bringing Wade along as well,” she said, which made him sigh, “Only because he’s going to whine worse than an actual child about not going to a carnival, he loves them.”

“Fine, just keep him in check and make sure that trap of his doesn’t curse around my little girl, and you’ve got yourself a deal,”

“It’s a deal,” she stuck out her hand and they shook in agreement.

After an hour they were ready to go, they decided to walk as it wasn’t very far and the weather was lovely, Wade and Hayden had been leading until the banners and flyers came into view, that’s when Hope had pulled her father along behind her eagerly.

Wade was grinning at her, and she looked at him, “What?”

“I mean, I’m pleased as punch that we’re going to the carnival and all, but-”

“But what?” she squinted at him.

“I don’t understand how it was Cable who convinced you to go,”

“He didn’t convince me, he asked me,”

“Okay... So I don’t see why you’re making me third-wheel on your date,”

She elbowed Wade in the ribs, “It’s not a date idiot, his daughter is here too,”

“That’s exactly why it is a date my dear sis- Haydes,” he corrected himself as she gave him a look, “Single parents have to take their kids with them on dates to see if the relationship has potential, depending on how well they get along with their kid,”

“That’s crap, you just made that up right now,” she pushed him slightly.

“It’s so not!” he argued

“Hey! Are you two coming, or what?” Nathan called to them, his daughter Hope standing at his side, she was looking all around her trying to take the colourful scenery in.

“Cool your jets old man we’re coming,” Wade said as he walked through the entrance.

She stared up at the entrance banner, it was bright and colourful and inviting, and she turned her gaze to the inside, taking in the scene before her. It was very noisy and overcrowded, something she would normally avoid, but today for some reason she felt safer than she had been in a long time.

“Haydes?”

“Yeah, I’m coming,” she smiled and walked over to Wade, they caught up to Nathan and Hope, she was bouncing on the spot impatiently.

“So, where to first?” Nathan asked Hayden, she looked to Wade for help.

“Uh, why don’t we start over there and work our way around?” he pointed to a water themed booth.

“Alright,” he agreed, and Hope turned to see where Wade was pointing and ran to the booth, Nathan followed after her worriedly. Hope’s hands held the edge of the booth that was named as ‘Aqua Snipers’ and she peered over, the attendee smiled and leaned over to talk to her.

“Hope, don’t run away like that, there are too many people here, I don’t wanna lose you.” he chided.

”Daddy, the man says that it’s five dollars to play a game,” she looked at him sweetly.

“Alright,” he pulled out a few crumpled notes from his pocket and placed it on the table, “How do we play?”

“Why it’s simple sir, all you have to do is aim this here plastic gun at the clown’s mouth over there, and once the balloon attached bursts you win,”

“Seems easy enough,” he shrugged but Wade grabbed the money on the table.

“Hold on Carnie, what’s the catch?” Wade pointed at him.

“No catch, just a two minute time limit,” he held his palm out for the money.

“Hmm, fine,” Wade placed the money in his hand sceptically; the attendee closed it quickly and put the money in his tin, “Let’s kick some butt.” He cracked his knuckles.

They were each given a plastic rifle that was attached to a tank of water, Nathan guided Hope on how to hold the toy properly and then the attendee started the game. The three of them were easily filling the balloon given their experience with guns, however, Hope was struggling to hold it with it being so heavy and shooting pressurised water, and they managed to pop their balloons before the game ended, while Hope’s balloon fizzled out.

She put the toy gun down, looking very disappointed as she stared at the ground. Nathan quickly rubbed her backside, “Hey now, it’s okay that you didn’t get it the first time, you can try again,”

He put more money on the table, helping her steady the gun and she focused on aiming it, while Nathan secretly helped her by tilting it in the correct position with his finger, and this time she won and she grinned happily.

“Thank you Daddy!” she giggled as she walked holding her new stuffed panda, the others each holding their own stuffed toy that they had won.

“Don’t thank me Hope, you did it all by yourself,” he ruffled her hair, before pulling her to his side as they walked on.

“I think my heart just grew three sizes,” Wade teased with a hand covering his heart, “And here I thought you were always a hard- butt. Hard-butt,”

”Nice save.” Nathan grunted, and Hayden nudged Wade in his side.

They played the Basketball Bonanza next, the adults playing before Hope so that she could see how the game worked, when she tossed her first ball she missed by a great distance. Nathan didn’t want her to be discouraged, so he lifted her up in his arms and winced briefly enough for Hayden to notice, and with the added height Hope was able to score and won another stuffed animal prize.

After dominating the Ring Toss Extraordinaire with use of some super abilities and calculative cyborg vision, they defeated the Milk Bottle Slammers, they’d agreed that whatever they’d won that Hope could have it. Unless it was a unicorn, those were exclusively for Wade. Hope was overwhelmed with all the toys that she now had for her collection, and although she hadn’t been very good at the games herself she enjoyed watching them play.

They seated themselves on the outskirts of the carnival that was made into a makeshift hay-bale courtyard for the food booths. Hope was attempting to suckle down on a large candied apple, Wade happily chewed down on his seventh chimichanga while Hayden opted for the classic caramel popcorn, and Nathan settled for a corndog (only after Wade insisted that it was a must-have for ten solid minutes).

“So did you enjoy your first carnival?” Wade asked after swallowing another bite.

“It was awesome! The games were so fun, and the people are so loud and everything is really fun here! I wish it was like this back home,” Hope said and gave her candy apple another lick.

“Oh, that’s nice Hope,” Wade looked down at her and then looked back up again, “But I was actually asking Haydes,”

Nathan turned to Hayden, “This was your first carnival too?”

“Well, yeah,” she admitted.

“That’s why you insisted on bringing him along, because you didn’t know what to do?”

“Sue me for not having a normal childhood, I suggested it because Wade had bi- complained about it. And I just wanted to know what the big deal was,” she stuffed her mouth with a few more pieces of popcorn.

“And?”

“With you two idiots and Hope, I think I could tolerate it a few more times over,” a smirk played on her mouth.

“She’s a lot more fun than Mommy,” Hope said with a grin, she looked at Nathan, “I like her.”

“Well thank you, I like you too, Hope,” she smiled down at the girl.

“Hope, it’s not nice to say mean things about your mother,” Wade chided making the other two turn their heads, “On the other hand, your father-”

“Daddy is the best Daddy in the whole wide world, I could never say anything mean about him!” she seemed shocked by the idea, “But Chet-”

“Who’s Chet?” Wade asked, taking another bite of his snack.

“Chet is… My ex-wife’s new husband,” Nathan explained, with a hint of bitterness.

“You��re divorced?” Wade asked surprised, “The way you talked about her- I’m sorry man.”

“And I hate him,” Hope continued, swinging her candied apple around. “He always tells me what to do, and sends me to my room all the time so he can be alone with Mommy and the baby,”

“Hope-” Nathan started.

“No, no, let her talk it out,” Hayden said, glancing at him before looking at Hope with full attention, “Hope?” They waited patiently.

“Mommy loves the baby more than me,” she spoke quietly, “I don’t think she wants me anymore,”

“Sweetheart, your mother still loves you, they’re just excited that the baby is here,” Nathan assured her.

“But I’m here, they’re replacing me.” A tear fell down her cheek, and he crouched down to her level.

“No one could ever replace you,” he touched her face gently, “Do you understand? A lot of attention is gonna be towards the baby now that it’s here, because it’s too small to take care of itself. Not like you though, you’re my big strong girl aren’t you?” he wiped away her tears.

“Yes,”

“Look at me,” he lifted her chin, “Your mother and I still love you, we just don’t love each other anymore, but just because we don’t love each other anymore doesn’t mean we’re leaving you behind, alright sweetheart?”

Hayden felt unconvinced about Nathan not loving his ex-wife anymore, as he had emphasised the ‘we’ a little too much for her to believe.

“Alright Daddy,” she managed to smile.

“Aren’t you glad I suggested she talk it out?” she asked smugly, “Hope, don’t you ever be afraid of telling someone you trust how you’re feeling, alright?” she looked at her again, “That way you can get the help you need,” she looked at Wade who smiled with a mouthful of chimichanga and nodded.

The carnival was closing up for the day and the group knew it was best to head back since it was getting dark. Nathan walked ahead with his daughter Hope holding his hand all the while swinging it slowly between them, on his back he carried a large bag of stuffed animals that could easily cover a bed, while Hayden and Wade fell in behind them.

“I felt like I had a real family outing today,” Wade spoke to her, “You and Cable were the Mommy and Daddy, Hope was your little girl and me well, I’m practically the weird family dog that humps everything,”

“I disagree with everything, except the part about you, you definitely hump everything,” Hayden shook her head smiling, and he suddenly looked serious.

“Why do you have to deny your feelings for Cable?”

“Why do you have to assume that I have any feelings for Cable?”

Nathan turned his head slightly hearing his alias spoken for the third time, “Why is it I keep hearing my name back there?”

“It’s nothing- we’re just saying, it’s strange seeing how sweet you are with your daughter,” Hayden quickly said.

“Very convincing,” Nathan said sarcastically, turning his attention ahead anyway.

Wade elbowed her, “Nice cover up dweeb,”

“Shut up mudak,”

“Ugh I hate it when you talk Russian, don’t you come with subtitles?” he poked her in the ribs.

“Nyet,” she smiled.

“Hades?” Hope called out suddenly.

“Yes Hope?” Hayden walked over to her side, Nathan raised a brow and looked at Hayden who shrugged she was just as confused as he was.

Hope’s free hand reached up to grab onto Hayden’s and she giggled and smiled up at both of them. “Swing me?” she asked sweetly.

“She wants us to lift her from the ground and swing her,” Nathan explained when he saw her confused face.

“Oh, I knew that,” she avoided looking at him.

“C’mon, I wanna swing!” Hope tugged on their hands, they lifted her slowly and began to swing her as they walked, and she giggled happily.

After a good ten minutes Hope grew tired of the initial excitement and they walked normally the rest of the way home, well as normal as it could be as she still held both of their hands in her own, with Wade trailing awkwardly behind like a lost dog.

They crashed on the couches once they reached home, tired from the day’s activities and the walk both to and from the carnival. Hayden on the other hand seemed unaffected as she walked over to the kitchen, grabbing one of her sodas and drinking from it as she returned to the rec room.

Hope was cuddled, and already asleep, against Nathan; his thumb was brushing over her backside, and he had the biggest smile on his face. Wade was stretched out on the opposite couch, with one leg hanging to the back towards the wall awkwardly; his breathing was deep as he slept peacefully.

“It was good for you to spend the day with her, you know,” Hayden spoke up suddenly, grabbing Nathan’s attention, she sat down on the armrest of the couch that Wade was sleeping on and she looked amused about his ridiculous position.

He nodded, and remembered their conversation earlier, “So your mother, how old were you when she uh-” he struggled to find the right word.

“I was about four, and she was murdered.” she only realised what she had said when Nathan’s eyes widened slightly, “Shit, I didn’t mean to tell you that last part.”

“Well it’s out now,” he watched her as she started to fidget with her hands, “You wanna elaborate or-?”

“Maybe when these two aren’t around,” she looked at both of them, “He doesn’t sleep for long, and I really don’t need his commentary,”

“Right,” he nodded, “I’m holdin’ you up to that. I remember someone said we all have to be on some level of okay,” he hinted at their conversation from earlier in the morning.

“Fine,” she rolled her eyes, “But for the record, it’s not holding me back like your problem was.” She went quiet for a moment, watching him holding his daughter fondly.

“She’s incredibly sweet, I can see why you missed her,”

“She’s a real angel,” he smiled down at her and looked at Hayden, “You know, she doesn’t even let her step-father hold her hand, in fact I’m not entirely sure if she even speaks to him much. But she seems really fond of you from the get-go,”

“That’s supposed to be a compliment, right?”

“Yeah, yeah it is,” he chuckled lightly.

“Well, alright then.” she nodded, “You see this is what I was talking about when I said I wasn’t good with people,”

“You’re doing just fine,”

She nodded, “So, this Chet guy, he’s the new man in your ex’s life?”

“Yeah,” he sighed.

“You still love her, don’t you? The way you spoke about her earlier-”

“She was my first love, it’s hard to forget that everytime I see her. It’s like a wound that keeps opening,”

She nodded, and cleared her throat lightly, “Well, you know, sometimes moving on is the only thing that helps to ease the pain,”

“Speaking from experience?” he asked, a little surprised.

“Unfortunately yes, but I had to move on otherwise I wouldn’t be here, if I had fixated on something I knew I couldn’t change,”

“I know that you’re right, but I’ve no clue where to start. It’s more complicated than just pushing past it,”

“Well if it helps you’re off to a good start,” he frowned at her, “Talking about it to someone else,” she explained, he nodded, “And if Wade could help me, then it’ll sure as hell be a piece of cake for me to help you,” she stood up. “I’ll make a list.”

Hayden went to the kitchen, taking the list that was stuck to the fridge, tearing the first page off and throwing it away. She took the pencil out and started writing, and after a few moments she tore the page off and then handed it over to Nathan.

He read the list. ‘Step One: Talk to someone. Step Two: Identify your feelings. Step Three: Take care of yourself. Step Four: Take your mind away. Step Five: Be positive.’

“Five steps. That’s supposed to help me recover?” he questioned.

“Believe it or not, and technically you’ve got four steps left,” she smiled.

He carefully moved Hope so that she lay on the couch and stood up slowly so as not to disturb her, he looked at Hayden. “Is it possible to do this in one night?” he asked as he looked at the paper again.

“If your mind is insanely configured, then sure but-”

“What are we waiting for then?” Nathan grabbed her wrist, and despite her confusion she let him guide her up the stairs.

Wade in a half-asleep state felt his brain short circuit, “What the fuck?” he whispered. “I knew it! Go get that bone you dog Nathan. Wait that’s backwards- this metaphor took a derailment to shits-ville very quickly,” he shook his head.

“Ah well, goodnight everyone,” he mumbled and shuffled on the couch until he was satisfied and went back to sleep.

Nathan opened the door to his room and released his hold on her, she stood in the doorway and frowned before shaking her head and slowly walked inside. “What the hell was that about?”

“I wanna get this shit over with,” he waved the paper in his hand and sat down on his bed.

“What, right now?” she asked, she glanced at his door and wondered if she should close it, when she looked back at him he was watching her. “Oh, okay then,” she quickly closed his door.

He patted the space next to him and she sat down next to him, their knees touching each other, “So step two is supposed to be identifying feelings,” he read out, “Is that really necessary?”

“Yeah, yeah it is,” she looked at him, “Look Cable are you sure-”

“If I wasn't, would I have dragged you here?”

“Alright, just checking,” she raised her hands.

“So how do I do this?”

“You just have to think about what you’re feeling,” he grunted, “Look if you don’t want my help-”

“No, no I’m just, thinking,”

“You grunt when you think?”

“Hey are you here to help, or insult me?”

“Sorry, you’re right,” she kept quiet and watched as his face screwed up in concentration.

“I suppose, I’ve been feeling…. Sadness… Anger… and guilt?” he cocked his head, “Huh yeah. So that’s supposed to take all night?” he scoffed, “Seems easy enough if you ask me,”

She chuckled, “That’s because you’ve listed them idiot, now you have to get to the nitty gritty and explain why you feel those emotions,”

“Damn, I knew there was a catch,”

“You know you can do this whenever, right? Nobody but you is making you talk right now,” she lifted a leg, wrapping her arms around it as she rested her face against it, and looked at him.

“No, no it’s fine,” he insisted, shaking his head, “If I want to move on, I’ve gotta do this.” He took a breath, “I’ve already wasted four years,”

“If you’re sure...” she looked at him with concern.

“I’m sure,” he nodded and took another deep breath before exhaling loudly, “I guess that I’m sad because... She was the first woman to treat me like a real person instead of some monster. She was always so caring and now, now she hates me.” Hayden listened intently.

“And I’m sure she hates me because I was always working; putting my job ahead of the family, keeping them safe.” he grumbled, “I guess that’s also what makes me feel guilty. I used to keep her out and that must have pushed her away...” he hung his head.

“And what’s making you angry?” she asked as she lightly touched his leg, which made his head spin momentarily when he raised it.

“What’s making me angry?” he blinked several times as he looked at her, coming out from his trance, “Everything.”

“Specifics Cable,” she gave him an encouraging squeeze.

“It is everything,” he sighed irritably, “I’m angry at myself for letting her feel that unloved that she went and found another man- I’m angry that I couldn’t win her back- I’m angry that she’s started a new life as if I was never a part of hers once, and most of all I’m angry that Hope has to suffer in all this.”

“Why do you think Hope is suffering?” Hayden gently pressed, her head tilted as she looked at him.

“She’s probably wondering if she has to pick a side when she doesn’t, and I know she’s getting bitter at her mother because I’ve been replaced and she feels like she’s been replaced too. I’m angry that I can’t do more for my little girl, that I get to spend so little time with her,” he clenched his fist suddenly and she moved her hand from his leg to hold it, his hand relaxed at the contact and the rest of his body loosened as well.

“It’s absolutely normal to be feeling that way Cable, but you can’t hold onto it, it just gets worse the longer you do,” she said sincerely, when he raised a brow at her hand she quickly pulled it back.

They were both silent for a moment, when he cleared his throat and looked at her again, she realised his cyborg eye was glowing. “And you’ve felt all those things too, with your mom?”

“Not with my mom, but yeah, I did. And Wade made things easier by letting me talk through it with him,”

“You were married before?” he frowned.

“Thank God not,” she laughed the notion away, “I um, I was in love once, at least at the time I thought it was love,” she turned her focus to his bedroom wall, trying to determine the shade of grey it was, “As it turns out I was just being used. But I still felt things, the unfortunate cons of being human,” she chuckled and his eyes softened slightly.

“And years later I’m here tonight, failing rather pathetically in helping you,” she gave a lopsided smile.

He shook his head, “You’ve no idea how much I needed to get this shit off my chest,” he placed a hand on her shoulder, “But don’t tell Wade alright? Fuck knows how much he’ll annoy me about having emotions,”

“Hey I know he’s an asshole most of the time, but he’s really nice when he wants to be,” she moved her leg off the bed and he moved his hand away, “I know it’s hard to believe, but it’s true.”

He nodded, “Thank you,” he mumbled.

“You’re welcome,” she gave him a small smile, she got up and walked towards the door, “Night,”

“Night,”

Nathan got up from his bed and went back downstairs, Hope was still fast asleep on the couch, he managed to scoop her up and carried her upstairs to his room and tucked her in.

He brushed her hair back gently and she shuffled, her eyes opened and she blinked at him sleepily, “Oh I’m sorry sweetheart, I didn’t mean to wake you,”

“It’s okay,” she smiled, “Daddy?”

“Yes Hope?” he smiled back at her.

“Can we hang out with Hades again next week?” she yawned and rubbed her eyes, “She’s really fun.”

“I’m sure she won’t mind,” he brushed her cheek, “Get some rest sweetheart,” he leaned over and kissed her forehead.

“I love you Daddy,” she whispered.

“I love you too, Hope,” he pressed another kiss on her head, and she got herself comfortable.

He eventually got into bed and wrapped his arms around her, smiling to himself as she curled up against his chest and went into a deep sleep. Until he finally fell asleep himself.

It had been a week since their outing to the carnival, and Nathan, Hayden and Wade were gathered in the kitchen, Nathan had gotten up earlier than the others and had already prepared himself an omelette, while Wade had just finished plating up breakfast for Hayden and himself.

“Hey Wade, what happened to that kid, what’s his name?” she spun her fork in the air trying to think.

“Russel?”

“Yeah, Russel, that’s it,” she nodded and stabbed her fork into her eggs, taking a mouthful and looking at him.

“Baldy McWheelchair decided that he could join the school, said it’d be good for him to be around other kids and have a more normal life than the purification shithole he was stuck in before.”

“Oh good,” she took another bite of her food and then pulled a face, “Wade I’m sorry, but your cooking is absolute shit,” she stood up, taking her plate and then tossed the rest of food in the garbage.

“Really? Tastes fine to me,” he finished off his own food quickly, and when he got up to put his plate in the sink Nathan caught a sly smile on his face.

“I’m surprised you even tried it,” Nathan said before taking another mouthful of his own food, eyeing Wade suspiciously, “I wouldn’t trust the dipstick not to do anything stupid,”

“Well, I do have the advantage of not dying on my side,” she shrugged and turned to Wade, “But seriously, how the hell did you manage to ruin scrambled eggs and toast this badly?” she placed her dish in the sink, before placing her hands on her hips.

“I don’t know!” He insisted, “I followed the recipe perfectly! Two eggs, a quarter cup of vodka, salt and pepper-”

“Vodka? You put eggs and vodka together? What the hell, Wade!”

“Hey, I thought you could use a buzz to start your day right, and nothing says buzz like the hard Russian stuff,”

“You were hoping to get her drunk, weren’t you?” Nathan gave him a look.

“Okay, you got me!” Wade held his hands up, “I’ve always wanted to see her drunk,” he gestured with his thumb and looked at her, “I thought it might loosen you up a little, ya know?”

“What, I’m too serious all the time?”

“Well… Sometimes, yeah,” Wade rubbed the back of his neck, and her face became angry as she approached him.

“First of all, I told you that I can’t get drunk, it’s just impossible and I’ve tried,” she stood inches from his face now, “And second of all, screw you,” she shoved him hard and he hit the kitchen counter with his backside firmly, she stormed out, leaving them alone.

“Nice going asshole,” he nodded, and then shook his head, “You just love to push her buttons don’t you?” he walked over to the sink and turned the tap on, “You know one day she might just snap because of you,” he added dish soap and started washing the dishes.

“Yeah right,” Wade chuckled, patting him on the shoulder, “In your dreams maybe,”

“Oh it’ll happen soon enough, I’m sure of it,” he smirked, “And I’ll be there laughing my ass off while I record it,”

“He’s going supernova!” Deadpool yelled eagerly, he turned to Cable who frowned at him, “I’ve always wanted to say that.”

“Not if I can help it,” Colossus bounded towards the towering orange flames as they were transforming into a hotter blue.

“Colossus, wait!” Hades called after him, but a cold hand grasped her shoulder and yanked her back, she looked at him incredulously and shook his arm off.

“He can handle it, Hades,” Cable assured her.

They waited with bated breath for their friend, their anxiety growing by the second, when they heard a maniacal laugh and Colossus came running back in a blind panic.

“Bozhe moy!” he screamed and stopped short of them, his skin was bright red compared to the usual silver and he turned to glance back at the fire, shaking his head, “Is too hot, even for me.”

Cable’s cyborg eye glowed and he looked at the others, “His temperature is gonna reach cosmic levels and soon, if we don’t stop him,” he frowned heavily at the flames, realising the asphalt around the mutant was beginning to melt.

“How hot is that? Some of us were high school dropouts,” Deadpool asked.

“So hot, it’ll actually kill your fucking ass,” Cable said seriously.

Deadpool whistled, “Damn,”

“I don’t like the look of this,” he grunted and stepped further back, the others except for Hades followed suit. “Hades, c’mon, what’re you doin’?”

“What I should have done sooner,” she glanced back to see their puzzled expressions, “I’ve got this one,” she nodded, her eyes changed colour and her scars became clear.

“What?”

Colossus raised a hand as she started moving forward, “Hades, it is too strong-” she ignored him and started running towards the chaos.

“Hey, wait! Are you crazy?!” Cable tried to run after her but she was engulfed by the blue flames, Colossus grabbed him by the back of shirt and pulled him back, narrowly letting him avoid the sudden surge of the fire.

They all winced, covering their eyes with their hands, from the intense heat. Despite their distance, they were sweating immensely, and they tried to see where their teammate had disappeared to.

A male voice boomed from within, “It's too late! You can't stop me, nobody can stop-”

Silence.

The flames suddenly dissipated to black smoke, revealing the asphalt surrounding the mutant that had burned away, leaving the ground underneath exposed. It was cracked and dry as if it had seen no water in the last thousand years, and there Hades stood, towering over the figure of an unconscious man.

They were all relieved to see her unharmed, and even better, alive, and slowly approached the scene as the ground was still hot. Cable cocked his head when he had a better look at her, under all the black soot he could see almost triple the amount of scarring than before and he couldn't understand why. He shook his head, thinking his eyes were just playing tricks on him, until he realised what was actually wrong and he stopped dead in his tracks.

“Best knuckle-sandwich I ever gave,” Hades beamed at them, she stopped glowing and the scars disappeared with the rest of the soot that covered her body, they were all gawking at her for a moment and she stared at them in confusion. “What?”

Colossus cleared his throat, “Um- Hades- you’re- uh,” he quickly removed his X-Men’s jacket, leaving his chrome chest bare, and handed it to her while looking the other way. “Take this.”

“I don’t understand-” she looked at the jacket, then at herself, and her eyes widened immediately, “Oh my God,” she grabbed it from him, putting it over her exposed body as quickly as she could.

Colossus was still looking away, rubbing the back of his neck and coughing awkwardly; Deadpool wolf whistled, while Cable swallowed hard before shaking his head and glancing down at the ground.

“Thank you, Colossus,” she looked embarrassed.

“It’s official, you can’t be my sister anymore, not after I’ve seen you naked because damn,” Deadpool remarked.

“Wade, that's disgusting,” she scrunched her nose in distaste, and then frowned, touching her head in confusion. Her hair was singed off, but it was already starting to grow back, leaving her with a five o’clock shadow of sorts.

“Also Comrade Titties, I’ve never had more of a hard-on than I do right now, you should do all your missions shirtless,” he teased a finger down Colossus’ chest and he moved away looking uncomfortable, “That way you can seduce the bad guys into surrendering,” Deadpool winked at Colossus and he shuddered.

“The way I’ve already surrendered myself,” he commented to an unknown audience.

Hades walked over Deadpool, looking him dead in the white eyes, “If you say anything else I will castrate you, and force feed you your own dick, got it?” she didn’t blink as she spoke.

He raised his hand to his mouth and spoke to Cable, “You think she’s still angry about earlier?”

“Yes I am, asshole,” she shoved him and he nearly stumbled onto his ass, she walked away in a huff.

“Gee, I can only imagine why,” Cable replied sarcastically, “Maybe it’s because you’re annoying as fuck, or maybe it’s because you put alcohol in her breakfast,” he suggested, “Oh wait, maybe it’s because you basically called her a kill-joy? It’s a mystery really,”

“Someone had an extra dosing of sass today,”

“Wade, where did you find alcohol to tamper with food?” Colossus asked in alarm, “We do not supply such things.”

“Exactly why I got a guy on the outside-” he said off-handedly, ignoring him as he looked at Hades, “Is Cable right Haydes? Are you really still mad at me because of this morning?”

“You know some days you’re thicker than others,” she sighed, and turned her attention to Colossus, “You have the collar right?”

“Da,” he handed her the collar that had been dangling from his back pocket.

She managed to crouch down next to the unconscious mutant, in spite of the huge jacket she was wearing, and placed the collar around his neck before activating it. She then lifted him up and over her shoulder, making her way to the X-Jet, and they all stared at her in amazement, when she turned around again suddenly.

“What?” she demanded, her eyes flashed violet and her hair sprouted further out as she stared at them, it was now as long as a boy’s haircut.

“Nothing.” They answered in unison, which made her roll her eyes.

“Look, let’s just get Johnny Storm here on ice, and head back home, huh?” she sighed, placing the mutant into one of the seats further back and buckled him in.

“Johnny Storm,” Deadpool snickered, “Nice one.” Hades glared at him and he kept quiet.

“Da, that is good idea.” Colossus headed inside the jet and sat himself down into the pilot’s seat, strapping himself in and flicking several switches that started the engine.

Cable and Deadpool took their own seats, and the group sat in silence for the long trip to the Ice Box.

When they arrived Colossus looked at her apprehensively, “Are you coming with me?”

“You’re joking right?” she scoffed, “I’m wearing nothing but your jacket, and you’re gonna go in there shirtless,”

“I do not see the relevance, we apprehended him together, do you not want them to know?”

“Seriously, you don’t see the relevance?” she raised a brow, “I’ll explain then,” she glanced behind her and leaned forward, speaking in Russian, “Americans like to assume that if a woman wears a man’s clothes, that she is his lover. Do you understand now?”

His eyes widened slightly and he nodded, “Da, then you stay here, I will go alone,”

“Hey what about us?” Wade complained as Colossus got out of his seat, unbuckling the still unconscious mutant.

“You really want to go back there, after we wrecked the place a few months back?” Nathan looked at him, “You really are stupid,”

“Hey, last time I checked it was your grenade that exploded a huge fucking hole in the side of it,”

“And who pulled the pin out dickhead?” He grabbed Wade's suit and held him a few inches from his face.

“Hey, will both of you just shut up?” Hayden half yelled and Nathan released him, shuffling into his seat grumpily. “Colossus is going in by himself, discussion over,”

“I will try not to be long,” he said as he carried the mutant out of the jet.

It was silent as they waited, until Wade spoke up, “So what were you telling my chrome cutie just now?” He was already unbuckled, and now leaned over the top of her seat and looked down at her.

She crossed her arms, ignoring him, and he walked around to her side, leaning as close as he dared before he poked her cheek playfully.

“C’mon Hayden, what did ya say huh?” he poked her again, “Trying to be sneaky speaking in your little language of love,”

She slapped his hand away, “Fuck off,” he poked her again and she grabbed his wrist, “I’ll break your wrist if you don’t stop, you know I can,”

“Ah but the question is, will you?” he asked, “So, c’mon, what dirty little secrets were you sharing with him?”

“I was telling him Americans are fucking stupid, and you’re just proving my point,” she shoved him away and he hit the wall of the jet.

“Ow, Jesus, no need to be so aggressive,”

“You had it coming, now sit down and shut up, I’ve had enough of your shit today,”

He sat down and rubbed the back of his head, he saw Nathan smirking next to him, “What are you smiling about Robo-Cop?”

“I told you, you’d piss her off again, and you did,”

“Yeah, well, you’re ugly,” Wade blew a raspberry at him and winced as something hit him firmly on his forehead, “Ow! What the fuck?” He picked up a manual for the jet from the floor, and looked up to see Hayden glaring at him.

“I told you to shut up,” Hayden sat back down in her seat and folded her arms, Nathan chuckled and sat back in his seat, smiling broadly as he rested his hands behind his head.

When they had reached the mansion they walked in on Ellie and Yukio having a conversation in the kitchen, they stopped once they saw the others, with the men leading and a disgruntled Hayden trailing behind.

“Damn, what the hell happened to you?” Ellie asked.

“Fire mutant versus normal clothing, guess who won?” She said bitterly, “Colossus here was kind enough to give me the literal shirt off his back, no thanks to these two,” she gestured to the others and they bowed their heads ashamedly.

“Well, at least your hair is growing back,” Wade noted, as her hair was now bob length, Hayden glared at him.

“I don’t understand, why didn't you just ask Colossus to get you a uniform?” Ellie asked.

“You do know I’m not part of the X-Men right?” she looked at her.

“No duh,” Ellie rolled her eyes, “You can still get something more official, since you are part of the X-Force,”

“I’m listening,” Wade popped his head in front of Ellie’s face, and she frowned at him.

“You have a uniform, douche,” she pushed his face away, “What I’m saying Hades, is that you can get a uniform that won’t get wrecked so easily. Right, Colossus?”

“NTW, I am uncertain Professor Xavier will be very impressed if I used facilities for other parties,” Colossus rubbed the back of his nervously.

“Oh come on Colossus, do you wanna have to give her your clothes every time hers gets destroyed? It’s very inconvenient and you know it,” she lathered the last bit on sweetly. “It’d be much more efficient to have her own uniform than to strip in front of Wade,”

“Fine, you have convinced me.” Colossus sighed as he glanced down at Wade, who was busy shining his chest with scented oil. “Wade, enough, please.” He gently moved the man away from him. “I will be back once I am appropriately dressed.” He walked down the corridor away from the rec room.

“Aw Colossus, wait!” Wade yelled after him, “You smell great!”

“Nyet, Wade!” They heard heavy footsteps as Colossus clearly ran away from Wade, as well as laughter, moving further away in the mansion.

“Well I better get dressed too,” Hayden cleared her throat, “Where're we gonna meet up?”

“I’ll tell Colossus to come back here,” Ellie suggested.

“Cool,” Hayden nodded before she left.

Nathan’s eyes followed her as she walked up the stairs, forgetting for a moment that he was not alone, until Ellie cleared her throat loudly and he jerked his head to look at her, Yukio giggled.

“What’s so funny?”

“Been a while since you boned someone, huh?” she asked, while crossing her arms, with a smirk on her face.

Yukio elbowed her softly, “That’s not appropriate!”

“But it’s true, isn’t it Cable?” she cocked her head to the side, the smirk growing bigger.

“Teenagers.” Nathan grumbled, Ellie grinned knowing that he was flustered.

He plopped down on the couch and started paging through one of his magazines, trying his best to ignore the looks they were giving him, even though he couldn’t actually focus on anything in particular.

The girls left and he let out a big sigh, Ellie was right, it had been a long time since he’d had sex, not that it was his fault. He sighed again and tried to read another article on the open page, bouncing his foot impatiently to distract himself and ignore the sudden itch he felt.

After half an hour they gathered together again, with Hayden and Colossus decently dressed, she handed him his jacket.

“Thank you,”

“You are most welcome,” Colossus smiled, “I will lead you to our other facility,” he cocked his and they all followed him further into the mansion.

“Hey sweet pea,” Wade spoke in the silence, “I’ve been wondering why we’re living in the furthest wing of the mansion, care to explain?” he latched onto his arm and looked up at him with big eyes, the man only glanced briefly at Wade as he shook his head.

“Why wouldn’t the school want the most destructive mutant in the world, that’s also a sexual deviant and a pain in the ass, to live closer to its students, I wonder?” Hayden said with as much sarcasm as she could muster.

“Exactly! She gets me,” he gestured at her.

“Da. That is precise reasoning that Professor Xavier had in mind,”

“But I’m an angel!” he protested.

“An angel that wields katana, guns and switchblades,” she shook her head, “Not to mention the weird stuffed unicorn fetish you have going on,” she added which made Colossus frown.

“You leave Cinnamon out of this!” he pointed at her and she raised her hands, making Wade ease up.

“I do not understand, what is this, you say… fetish?” Colossus asked Hayden.

“Aw come on, don’t you start talking Russian too,” Wade whined, “It’s annoying enough when she does it,”

“I’ll explain in a minute. How long have you been away from home? You sound a little rusty,” she asked, making Wade groan and fall back from them.

“About fifteen years at least, if not more,” he thought for a moment, “I have lost track of time, but I do not regret leaving. And you?”

“Going on seven years soon,” she said, “It’s nice to talk to someone in my mother tongue for a change,” she smiled up at him.

“Ugh, this sucks balls,” Wade grumbled next to Nathan.

“For once I can agree with you,” Nathan grunted.

“It makes for a nice change of pace,” Colossus agreed, “You still have not explained to me what I asked earlier?”

“Oh, da,” she shook her head with a smile, “You see it’s uh… it’s a sex thing. When someone gets satisfaction from something specific. And with him, it’s a stuffed unicorn,” she gestured behind her and the men looked at each other, Wade shrugged and Cable grunted.

“When you say ‘satisfaction’, does that mean what I think it means?”

“Yes, unfortunately,”

Colossus shuddered, “That is most unfortunate,”

“Which district did you grow up in?”

“Siberia,”

“Siberia? I also grew up there! Whereabouts?”

“Very out of way, in a farmland in Ust-Ordynski,”

“You grew up on a farm?” She looked at him in surprise, “I would never have guessed,”

“What about you?”

“I lived further North in a small village, until I was taken to the Hydra facility in the mountainside,”

“Anywhere I might know of?”

“I'm not sure, the last I saw it was in ruins, the town was called Usoluga,”

“I heard of that place, my family told me that it was destroyed by terrorists, but it was Hydra, wasn’t it?” He asked, looking disappointed.

“Yes, they took the children for their experiments and killed the rest, I later learned from Wade that none of them survived.” She looked forward grimly, “Well everyone except me.”

“And today you are preventing that from happening to others,”

“I suppose you are right,” she smiled slowly, without realising.

“I know it can be hard to find the good from bad times, but it is important to always make the best of a circumstance, no?” He gave her a small smile and she nodded.

They walked in silence the rest of the way, and after what felt like forever in the seemingly endless passageways, they finally entered a large completely white and empty room. The three newcomers looked around, confusion evident in their expressions, and turned back to Ellie, Yukio and Colossus.

“This is the Trial Chamber,” Ellie explained, Colossus only nodded and crossed his arms slowly.

“Here we can create different scenarios from control room, and you must use abilities against them,” Colossus explained, “Then we can develop a suit adapted to your needs based on what results are recorded,” Hayden was eyeing the room, not paying attention.

“Hades, did you hear him?” Ellie asked.

“Haydes, you alright?” Wade put his hand on her shoulder.

“What? Yeah, I’m fine,” she shrugged his hand off, “Just hits close to home is all.”

“You and me both,” Nathan agreed.

“Well let’s not get into details about the world’s saddest childhoods just yet; we need to get you a suit, Haydes,”

“That is correct,” Colossus nodded, “However, I think it is good idea for Cable to join too,”

“What?” Hayden and Nathan said together, they both frowned at each other.

“Is very simple, both Hades and Cable will be in chamber, computer will record results and we will have suits for both in no time.”

“Uh, wouldn’t it be easier to do the trial one at a time?” she asked.

“Computer is very smart, it can record many results at one time, and is time-saver for all of us.”

“I was hoping you wouldn’t say that,” Nathan sighed, they shared a look with each other.

“No offense.” They both said.

“Okay, can we stop the Grady twin thing that keeps going on here?” Wade pointed between them.

“I agree with Douchepool, and it’s true, it would save us a lot of time,” Ellie argued.

“Also it is good training as team, Hades you and Wade are already familiar with each other, but you two without Wade are not,”

“Alright we get it; there are more pros than cons. Let’s just get this over with,” Nathan sighed again.

“Agreed,”

“Then we must not waste any more time,” Colossus nodded and the girls followed him to a hidden door, it opened slowly and they walked into a different room.

Wade covered his mouth and whispered into Hayden’s ear, “Now’s your chance to get Cable’s balls, or get your own and fess up, this is the perfect opportunity, either way you’d be left with a handful of balls and that’s a win.” He winked before following the others.

“Wade you absolute ass,” she muttered, watching him close the door with an evil chuckle, Nathan raised a brow. “He’s just being an asshole,” she shook her head, following with a big sigh, Nathan nodded.

“Welcome to the Trial Chamber, Hayden Jones and Nathan Summers,” a robotic female voice spoke, they both huffed at hearing their names, knowing Wade was behind that factor, “Initiating Stage One, prepare yourselves.”

The white walls and flooring seemed to stutter and vibrate and they morphed, the floor turned to asphalt and the walls became buildings, parked cars and rubble were scattered around them. An entire city street setting formed within a blink of an eye, and upon touching a nearby hydrant Hayden was surprised to feel how solid the object was, considering moments ago it had not existed.

The brick walls from the buildings nearby lifted up and a gang dressed as typical thugs emerged, upon seeing the two they charged forward and yelled, Hades and Cable held their fists up ready to fight.

Hades landed a swift punch to a woman’s face and she fell to the floor, her eyes were glowing their familiar hue, and she looked up to find that a camera was tracking their movements.

“Nanobots?” she asked as she stomped on the body and it caved in, it separated into millions of tiny pieces, and seemed to sink into the floor.

“Well we would certainly not use real people,” Colossus’s voice sounded over the speakers.

“I wasn’t expecting this high-tech stuff here of all places,”

Cable threw a man over his shoulder and he disintegrated into the floor. “How’d you know they were nanobots?” he asked, punching another figure in the stomach and elbowing the next in the face.

“I ate a lot of carrots as a kid,” she said sarcastically, “What do you think?”

“We get enough sarcasm from Wilson, thanks,” he glared at her for a second before returning his attention to the fight, and she looked at him slightly confused.

They fought off the wave of robots for another ten minutes before the two walls opened again and they disappeared into it almost like a cloud of dust, a green light lit up briefly and the walls closed, the voice sounded through the speakers once again.

“Stage One, successfully completed, please use this time to catch your breath, and prepare yourself for the next stage,”

“Is it me, or does she sound like Colossus?” she asked out loud.

“I guess,” he shrugged.

“She sounds like me because I was part of group who programmed her, dialogue is all me.” Colossus answered for her, “And this is unwise use of time to prepare for next stage.”

“Yeah, yeah we know we have to be efficient with what we do with our time, God. Do you have an off switch for that?” she rolled her eyes, making him smirk.

“According to results so far... You are both lacking team skills, luckily next stage will fix this problem,”

The female voice spoke once again, “Initiating Stage Two, on the platform that is rising up behind you, you will find a weapon that will help fight your enemies. Prepare yourselves.”

They turned and saw the platform rise up, only one weapon lay on it, they looked at each other and then back at the weapon, neither making a move for it. The walls opened up and a wave of robots flooded out, this time they were armed with batons, nunchucks and other arrays of hand-to-hand combat weapons.

“You know what, why don’t you take it? I don’t need it,” she said, before she ran towards the robots and started to attack them, taking on more than one at a time.

Cable shot her a glare but grabbed the Bo staff from the platform nonetheless, before running forward and using it to knock the robots down. It was easy for the pair to take down the robots on their own, but the number of enemies only grew, and they ended up being forced back to back trying to cover each other.

He looked over his shoulder for a second, and without thinking asked, “What were you and Colossus talkin’ about?”

“What?” she turned and looked at him for a second, taken back.

“I said, what were you and Colossus talkin’ about?”

“Why is that any of your business?” she questioned, “Besides, is now really the time?” she kicked another bot down, looking quite annoyed.

“Yeah I think so,” he stated, “Seeing as how I was the topic of interest,”

“What are you talking about?”

“I think you know exactly what I’m talking about,” he grunted, almost taking a hit to the head from another bot.

“No, no I really don’t,” she shook her head, “Would appreciate it if you could enlighten me.”

“You tellin’ me you didn’t hear NTW’s remark earlier?”

“About what?” Hades grabbed a baton from an enemy once she had knocked it down, but it disintegrated in her hands immediately. “Hey! What the hell?” she protested, glaring at the camera.

“It would be far too simple if you could use enemies’ weapons, this is a team building exercise,” Colossus sounded amused.

“Fine,” she looked over her shoulder at Cable who was still using the staff. “Cable, could I borrow the staff?”

“If you admit you were talking about me, sure,”

“What the hell are you talking about? I was talking about Wade and his disgusting unicorn fetish, not you, dickhead!” she argued, “Now would you give me the damn staff?”

He scowled at her, “If you think you can use this stupid stick better than I can, go for it.” He threw it at her without giving her a second glance as he turned around.

She rolled her eyes, before smirking as she began twirling the staff in her hand like a pro, then swinging and beating away their enemies. Cable stepped away and watched as she worked the weapon with ease, and then she unexpectedly darted towards him with the staff pointed directly at him.

“What the hell-”

“Duck!” she warned and he crouched down just in time for her to stab an enemy in the chest. “Nice reaction time,” she offered her hand to help him to stand up again.

He took it, but still looked exasperated, “Didn’t really feel like getting impaled today,”

“Yeah, sorry Olaf,” she said. They looked up when they heard Wade laughing over the speakers.

He grabbed the staff from her and she furrowed her brows as he raised the weapon before yelling, “Duck!” and swung with great force, making the enemy bot explode on contact.

“Stage Two, successfully completed,” the walls closed and the robots disappeared once again.

“See, not so hard to work as a team.” Colossus said smugly.

“Whatever tin man,” she sighed, “Nice swing by the way, you have a good arm,” she nodded to Cable.

“Thanks, you’re not so bad yourself.”

“Your final stage is coming up, and then we will have results ready to start on your suits,” Colossus said.

“Initiating Stage Three. By the way Colossus you have a fine ass,”

“Bozhe moy, Wade I told you not to touch computer, what are you doing?”

“Relax Rasputin Russia’s Greatest Love Machine, I just played a little with the dialogue,” Wade said as innocently as he could, “Haydes remember what I said about balls? Now go get ‘em!”

“Bozhe moy indeed,” she palmed her face and rolled her head back in annoyance.

“Balls? Never mind it involves Wade, I don’t think I even want to know.” Cable scrunched his nose at the thought.

“What did NTW say earlier?”

“What?”

“You said I must’ve heard what she said earlier, what was it?” she repeated.

“Nevermind about that, we got work to do,”

“You brought it up man,” she turned her head the other way, hearing something that he did not, “You’re off the hook, for now.”

A platform rose behind them once again, this time an array of guns, knives and other weapons were displayed across it, Hades quickly grabbed two small handguns and hung them into the space of her belt and jeans and she armed herself with two daggers as well.

Cable’s cyborg eye glowed and the large gun hovered from the platform and moved into place on his backside, he winced slightly at the contact, and his grip tightened around the staff he was still holding in his hands.

The platform disappeared and the panels opened to release a flood of robots, this time armed with similar weapons to their own; she stood with her almost pressed against his, and turned her head slightly over her shoulder.

“Ready?”

“Always.”

She shot down the robots that were coming in on her side and Cable knocked down those on his own side, soon they were surrounded to the point of suffocating their movements.

Cable grunted in effort as they were hitting him from all angles. Each hit pained from the torture he had endured only weeks earlier, becoming almost unbearable as he moved and bent his frame in different directions to fight. He turned his head noticing that Hayden was glowing brightly, she crushed the robots’ heads in her hands and others she snapped the necks of, the masses were lessening around her but increasing around him.

“Cable, behind you!” she yelled without turning around, he was confused but ducked and managed to avoid the hit from a robot that had tried to attack him.

He decapitated it with the staff, “Thanks,” he muttered, taken back a little.

It took some time to finish the final stage as he was struggling with the pain shooting through his spine out to the rest of his body, so she had to do most of the work, while guiding him to destroy the other bots.

When they were finally finished Nathan had a glistening forehead and his hair was damp from sweat, he was bent over and breathing heavily, Hayden on the other hand looked as if she just came from a morning stroll.

The scene changed back into the white room it was prior and the control room door opened. “Trial completely successfully, you may now leave the chamber.” The voice announced, and the main doors opened as well.

“Thank fuck,” Nathan breathed out, resting his hands on his knees, his face looked pained but he didn’t seem ready to admit it, “I thought that would never end,”

“You alright old timer?” she asked, her hand rested gently on his shoulder as she leaned over to look him in the face.

“Just my spine, I’ll live,” he stated, trying to straighten himself but wincing as he did.

She lifted his shirt, startling him, she looked over the scarring along his backside, brushing her hand along it as softly as she could. The muscles twitched and appeared to be swollen and deep purple in colour.

“You need to lie down, you’ve nearly opened your wound up again,” she lowered his shirt and soothed the material down. “C’mon,” she wrapped an arm under his shoulder, helping him ease up from his bent position.

He didn’t argue when she headed out of the chamber, the others exchanged worried glances at each other as she led him out, she supported most of his weight easily and he was silently thankful.

They finally reached his room and Hayden lowered Nathan carefully to sit on his bed, she said nothing as she disappeared into his bathroom, he managed to lift his legs up on the bed and lay back and it was fine until a shooting pain carried through his body and he pulled a face just as she returned. She held a small pill bottle in one hand and a glass of water in the other; she set the glass down and quickly popped open the bottle, letting a couple of pills fall into her palm before hovering it in front of him.

“Take these for the pain, they should kick in within an hour,”

“Thanks,” he mumbled, taking the pills from her and swallowing down with a mouthful of cold water.

She nodded, heading towards the door to leave, but stopped short as she held the door, and looked at him curiously, “What made you think I was talking to Colossus about you?”

“It’s nothin’, really I was overreacting,” he shook his head, “Forget I said anything,”

“Alright.” She didn’t seem convinced, “Guess I’ll leave you to it then,” she lifted her chin, leaving his room and closing the door behind her with a soft click.

He moved his head back and closed his eyes slowly, and then groaned loudly, grabbing one of his pillows and pressing it firmly into his face in frustration. “Why did I have to say anything? She had no clue,” he mumbled into the pillow, and then threw it next to him on the bed.

He blinked several times at the ceiling, and then decided to close his eyes again, focusing on his breathing so that he might be able to sleep. Soon enough his body caved in to the drugs and exhaustion, and he fell asleep within minutes.

“I didn’t think your computer would be very accurate, but it actually works very well,” Hayden said approvingly as she paged through the paperwork from their trial half an hour ago.

“We have many impressive things in X Mansion. Only problem is we do not have access to materials directly, those must be ordered from outside sources. And as for design, I will be helping you to make one,” said Colossus, she cocked her head at him. “I am fairly decent at drawing,” he shrugged.

“He’s being modest, he’s crazy good,” Ellie spoke up and then she took the papers from Hayden and riffled through them, “Colossus, I think you should start working on the design, we’ll search for where we can get the materials.” Yukio grinned and they walked out together, linking their hands as they did.

Colossus led Hayden down a few passageways, with Wade secretly tailing behind them, a mischievous grin plastered on his face.

Nathan opened his eyes and sat up groggily, by his estimation he’d been asleep for a few hours already, the pills had done their job and the throbbing pain had ceased. At least for now.

He swung his legs over the bed to the floor and stood up slowly, he wasn’t fully awake yet, but something in his mind nagged him to see what was happening with the others. He washed his face and quickly dabbed it with a towel, before heading downstairs, feeling a little more awake.

It took him fifteen minutes to finally find them, he heard Hayden laughing and peaked around the library’s door frame to see her standing next to Colossus who had a sketchpad in front of him and was sketching at one of the tables. He felt something akin to anger from his gut, as saw her hand touch Colossus on his broad metallic shoulder, he shook his head ignoring his thoughts.

Then he realised if Wade hadn’t been there that the two would have been alone, as this wing of the library was clearly not used much, he walked over slowly and eyed them curiously. They were chatting away in their own language, until Hayden caught his movement and looked up at him, she had a big smile on her face as she greeted him.

“Hey, you’re up!”

“Yeah, what’s goin’ on?” he looked around at the scattered crumpled papers, pencil shavings and for some reason, crayons.

Nathan was surprised that Colossus had not tidied the mess up, until he realised most of the chaos surrounded Wade who had seated himself happily on top of the table like a naughty child, with his legs crossed and a sketchpad rested on his lap as he drew in silence.

“We’re designing my suit,” she said with a note of eagerness.

“I’m helping!” Wade said excitedly, Hayden shook her head and mouthed, ‘He’s not’, which made Nathan smirk. “See, I’m already done, Colossus is so slow. Take a look, it’s awesome right?” he asked, shoving the sketchpad in her direction.

She took it and looked over the picture, her smile quickly turned to a frown and she threw the sketchpad back at him, it hit him on the arm instead of his head as intended as he managed to deflect it, and it landed onto the table in front of Colossus.

“Wade, you’re disgusting. And what universe are you from where you think you of all people would see me wearing that of all things?” she crossed her arms.

Nathan glanced down and saw a childlike drawing of what he presumed was a sexy woman wearing what looked like the skimpiest lingerie possible.

“You’re a pig Wilson,” Nathan scrunched his nose.

“Da,” Colossus agreed after seeing the sketch, covering his eyes and pushing the notebook away from him.

“Everyone’s a critic,” Wade sighed and grabbed the sketchpad, “I won’t sit here and take this any longer!” he awkwardly stumbled from his position on the table and then stood up dramatically, clutching the item to his chest.

“Where’re you going?” Hayden asked.

“I’m gonna have a meeting with Cinnamon about how rude you all are,” Wade said and Nathan rolled his eyes.

“Translation: You’re off to mast- pleasure yourself,” she glanced at Colossus, “Sorry,”

“It’s sad that you know me that well,” Wade shook his head, “Oh well, you’re stuck with me, forever.” He whispered the last part and then promptly left the room.

“I’m still waiting for the day where I can convince myself that saving his ass was a good idea,” Nathan shook his head, watching Wade leave.

“That would be an eternity, and then some,” she nodded her head sideways.

“Is ‘cinnamon’ new slang term I do not know of?” Colossus asked, frowning between them.

Hayden looked apprehensive and Nathan almost chuckled, “You better tell him, cause I’m not,”

“It’s his uh… unicorn plushie,” Hayden explained.

“Bozhe moy,” Colossus shuddered, “Is best I do not learn anymore of Wade’s… Past times,”

“You and me both bud,” she patted Colossus’ shoulder and leaned over, “This is looking pretty good. I mean if I could see the rest under your hand-”

“Oh, da, it is ready.” He moved his hand away, sliding the sketchpad in front of her carefully.

“Wow, Colossus… It’s great.” Her mouth hung open for a moment and then she smiled brightly, “Thank you,” she leaned to the side, wrapping an arm around his shoulder, hugging him to her side.

Nathan felt his cyborg eye twitch involuntarily, seeing how her face pressed briefly against the giant man’s face, before she moved away.

“I’m going to show NTW so that she can order the right colours for the materials,” she took the sketchpad in hand and bounded out the door, leaving the men alone for the first time today.

He crossed his arms, eyeing the metal mutant, “Why are you always so nice to her, huh?” His voice was deeper than usual, more menacing, as Colossus shuffled in his seat and looked at him with wide eyes.

“I’m sorry?” He meant it to be an apology, but he was genuinely confused at Nathan’s sudden hostility.

“Look you can drop the innocent act, just don’t ever talk about me behind my back again, or we’re gonna have a problem. Got it?” He warned, he didn’t wait for an answer as he stormed out of the library.

“Bozhe moy... What did I do wrong?” he asked himself, completely stunned.

“I’m glad we’ve sorted all that out, thanks for this NTW,” Hayden gave her a smile.

“Not a problem, and by the way, you can call me Ellie,” she said, “I just don’t like it when Douchepool does, but you’re cool,” she gave her a small smile.

“Well, thanks Ellie. Uh, I’m not sure why Colossus disappeared, but could you thank him for me?”

“Sure,” she nodded, “Oh boy, here comes trouble,” she cocked her head up and Hayden looked up to see Wade running towards them from outside the mansion.

“Haydes! We have a situation so drop whatever the fuck you’re doing, this is more important-” Wade panted heavily once he reached them.

“What is it now, Wade?”

“I fucked up big time.” He looked scared.

“Um, don’t you always?”

“Wow, just rub salt in the wound it’s fine I have regenerative healing, right? But seriously just-” he stopped speaking when he noticed Ellie.

“I’m leaving Douchepool, whatever you broke now is not my problem,” she rolled her eyes and left the room.

Wade looked around the room and pulled Hayden closer to him, “Cable’s going to kill me.”

“You actually messed around with it when I told you it was a bad idea, didn’t you?” she pinched the bridge of her nose, “God Wade, do you only have two brain cells? I swear if you do, one bounces around idly in there while the other masturbates in a dark corner with a unicorn.”

“Pretty much yeah,” he admitted with a shrug of his shoulders, “I can’t help myself.”

She slapped the back of his head hard, “Idiot.”

“Ow.” He rubbed the back of his head, “Save my sorry ass? Please?” he asked, trying to give the biggest sad eyes he could muster.

“Fine, where is it?” she sighed.

“Hey, has anybody seen my gun, Hades, Dickhead?” Nathan asked, suddenly appearing from around the corner.

“Shit fuck,” Wade then whispered, “He knows.”

She spoke quietly to him, “Wade, would you relax?” she turned back to Nathan, “Nope, we haven’t seen your gun Cable, you sure you didn’t leave it back in the weaponry when you were cleaning it the other day?” she asked in a convincing innocence.

“Yeah I guess so, I’ll check again,” he rubbed his head and frowned, thinking it over in his head as he walked away.

Wade took the opportunity to run out the door leading to the nearby woods outside, “Shit fuck, shit fuck, shit fuck, shit fuck-”

“What’s the tool’s problem now?” Nathan turned around, frowning heavily.

“I think the only two brain cells he had left just killed themselves,” she shook her head, Nathan chuckled.

“I’ll uh, see you around,” he nodded, leaving her behind.

She ran out in the direction that Wade had gone to, debris from destroyed trees lay all around the area, in the centre of it all he was crouching on the ground with pieces of Nathan’s gun in panic as he picked up one not knowing how he was going to fix it.

“God, what took you so long?!”

“I would have been with you sooner, had you not run off like a complete shithead! I had to explain your weirdness because he was asking, I didn’t want him to get suspicious.”

“Okay, fine. Now help me put this fucking shit back together before Cable-”

“Before Cable what?”

“Fuck me.” Wade said in a shrill voice.

“He just might. And what are you so worried about anyways? You’ve got regenerative healing moron,” Hayden said nonchalantly.

“That just means Cable can fuck me over as many times as he likes,”

“I did tell you not to play with it,” she said in a matter of fact tone.

“What in the actual fuck?” Nathan stopped just a few feet before the scene. “Not only did you lie, but you also broke my gun?” he clenched his jaw, his cyborg eye beginning to glow.

“Cable, please don’t hurt me,” he choked out.

“Oh I’m way past hurting you,” he cracked his knuckles on both hands and twisted his head to let his neck click. “I made that gun myself, and you played with it like it was some toy? You’re fucking dead.”

“Haydes? Can I get a little help, please?” Wade nervously gulped and looked over his shoulder; she paid him no attention as she crouched on the ground.

“Reap what you sow bitch,” she commented as she raked through the leaves, collecting some of the smaller pieces of the gun.

“Oh this is going to be very fun,” Nathan pounded his fist into his other hand and a wicked grin spread across his face.

“Spoiler alert: no faces will be pounded on today,” Hayden spoke up and Nathan whipped around, looking at her in confusion. She stood up and handed him his gun fully intact.

“How did you-?” he faltered, staring at the gun in his hands.

“Go ahead and fire it, I made it better than it was before it was broken,” she said confidently.

Nathan lifted the gun and aimed it at Wade, it was on a lower setting and he fired the blast, it sent Wade flying backwards into a faraway tree.

“Ow, my ass!” Wade yelled and Hayden snorted.

“It’s even better than before, how’d you-” he eyed the gun, “How’d you manage to ease the recoil so much?”

“It wasn’t that difficult, it’s a fairly basic weapon that you made with what you could get your hands on.” She shrugged, “So now you can’t pound Wade into the ground, I think him breaking his ass on that tree was punishment enough.”

Nathan stared at her in awe as she made her way over to Wade, he said something to her that made her roll her eyes and then she scooped him up bridal style from the ground, he nuzzled his face under her chin.

She walked past Nathan and Wade wrapped his arms around her neck, “Love you sis,”

“Yeah whatever idiot,” she sighed as she carried Wade towards the mansion.

___________________________________________________________ >> Previous Chapter (2) << >> Next Chapter (4) <<

>> Chapter Index <<

#cable #nathan summers #nathan summers x oc #cable x oc #original character #russell collins #fire fist #deadpool #deadpool 2 #wade wilson #hayden jones #marvel fanfiction #fanfiction #fanfic #writing #marvel

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stimmyvillainarchive · 6 years ago

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WHY does the android app gotta suck so much, when i click the faq link it just like refreshes the page,,,, this happens with all links in bios on the andoird app :[

NNNN lovin this broke ass app.

I’mma go ahead and paste the FAQ just under the cut, hopefully you should be able to read it now :’))

(FAQ is written by Mod Joker)

“Are requests open?”

We get this ask a lot. And while I don’t mind answering, it does get a lilll annoying sometimes since we’re essentially repeating ourselves constantly. Before you ask, please check our ask box! It will ALWAYS give our request status!

From now on if we receive requests when they’re closed, we’re going to delete the message entirely. You’re free to ask again when they’re open, but we need breaks!

“Can allistic/neurotypical people follow?”

Yes! So long as you’re respectful of stimming and understand it’s not an aesthetic or something to make fun of.

“It says there’s two mods, but I only really see Mod Joker post.”

There is! But Mod Boo is rather, well, shy. We both are, tbh. I’ve just gotten used to talking a lot on this blog. And to tell ya the truth I invited her to mod this with me because she considered making a blog but wasn’t sure how she’d do it, and was worried she’d be too awkward/quiet. But she actually tends to see your messages a lot! She just tends to let me handle things. But if you ever wanna talk to her, just say the message is specifically for her and I’m sure she’ll get back to you. She’s very friendly and tbh one of the best people to talk to!!

“How do you make gifs?”

I use the same method stimmybby uses! His tutorial’s right here!

“How do you make banners?”

I use photoshop and for backgrounds (depending on what type of background), I use paint tool SAI. I made a tutorial on how I do it here!

“Can we use your banners for posts that aren’t stim related?”

Absolutely! So long as credit is given and you’re not in our dni, then use it as you like! Discourse posts, art, vent posts, promo posts, whatever floats your boat!

“Can I use your gif/s?”

As long as there’s credit to us for the gif/s and you don’t apply to our dni, you’re free to!

“How can I credit you?”

There’s a few ways! Such as

- Including the credit in the post and/or under the cut (this is the best way people can access the original post and see the credit!

- Include the credit in the post’s captions

- Include the credit in the tags

- Include a link in the post to another post that has the credits in it

- Saying you got the gif/s from us in the post

“What are bad/wrong ways to ”“credit”“ you?”

- Saying “I don’t own these gifs”

- Saying “credit to the original owner(s)/gifmaker(s)

- Straight up not saying you took these gifs from people/including in no credits

- Claiming the gif/s are yours/you made them

If I see any of these I WILL publicly call you out on it and you WILL be blocked immediately thereafter. That block will not be lifted.

“What does REG mean?”

Reactionary Exclusionary Gatekeeper. Meaning people who try to exclude certain queer people from queer spaces. Such a biphobes, transphobes, aphobes, panphobes, and so on.

“What does TERF mean?”

Trans/Transgender Exclusionary Radical Feminist. Meaning radfems who are transphobic and are violent towards trans people (especially trans women).

“What does SWERF mean?”

Sex Worker Exclusionary Radical Feminist. They’re radfems who try to exclude sex worker from their feminism and often treat women attracted to men as less worthy.

“What’s the ADT community?”

ADT stands for “Actually Dysphoric Trans/Transgender” and was created by transmedicalists/truscum to break off from the trans community. It’s an insult to the trans community, an insult to the creator of the transgender pride flag (it’s removed the white that was there for people who ID as non-binary/outside the gender binary), and is there purely to start drama and create rifts in a community that’s already got enough enemies for simply existing in a transphobic world

“He/Him lesbians don’t exist/they’re transphobic towards trans men”

As a trans man who doesn’t think the world revolves around me and who understands that what lesbians decide to do it literally none of my goddamn business: get the fuck over yourself you whiny pissbaby

“What do you mean by people in the true crime community?”

People who sexualize, romanticize, excuse, and/or support serial killers and their actions/crimes. This doesn’t include people who are INTERESTED in the topic of crimes, serial killers, etc but acknowledging how these people are disgusting and their actions are unforgivable.

“Why are you anti-cgl?”

Cause we hate pedophiles and are decent human beings.

“You’re bigoted to kinksters just like homophobes are bigoted to gay people!”

I hate to break it to ya bud but I’m proudly kinkphobic and you’re a giant homophobe!!

“I’m a SFW cgl(re)/littlespace blog so I’m following/interacting uwu”

No the fuck you aren’t!! You’re a kink blog, there’s no such thing as a “sfw kink” even if you’re remaining two braincells are too busy fighting over the last pacifier to tell you some fuckin common sense. Your ass is getting blocked and I’ll also be using your blog to take a look at the people you interact and block them too just for safe measure! Eat a cactus, fuck nugget

“You hate lesbians if you hate TERFs”

You owe every lesbian an apology for assuming they’re all mysogynistic, LGBT+phobic pieces of horseshit like you are. Eat a dick.

“aces/aros aren’t LGBT uwu”

Wow… that’s so wrong Alexa play Fuck You by Lily Allen

“Me/Someone I know/(insert user/s) has been blocked. Why?”

There can be a number of reasons why you’re blocked, and I’m not afraid to block people as I want this place comfortable and safe for the mods and followers. So there’s several reasons as to why.

- You apply to our DNI (see BYF)

- You’re a (insert harmless children’s cartoon) critical blog (I tend to block those due to them saying LGBT+phobic things)

- You get into kin drama

- You’re an ace discourse, pan discourse, bi discourse, and/or overall REG discourse blog (this does not mean I block inherently block discourse blogs! I block the shitty ones)

- You’re a spam/porn/etc bot (if I’ve gotten this wrong, lemme know! I tend to block shady and empty blogs for this reason unless their desc/url/etc says it’s empty/weird for a reason)

- You’re a blog that frequently posts/centers around one or more of my triggers

- You’re an aesthetic blog (though I tend to soft block for them. But this is NOT an aesthetic blog and stimmy is NOT an aesthetic)

- You’re an “anyone can interact” stim blog

- You’re a stim blog that steals/doesn’t credit the gifs they use

- I feel you and I are going to argue and I’m just saving us the trouble of future unpleasant encounter/s

- You’ve been shitty to my friends or just been shitty to people in general and I’ve noticed it

HOWEVER I’ve made slip ups in the past! If you feel you don’t apply to any of these, you can contact me through my main and ask why. Sometimes I don’t always remember why I blocked somebody (sadly there’s a lot of shitheads on this site I’ve needed to block) or I’ve confused one blog for another person’s blog. Or maybe the person was more chill than I thought. Please contact me yourself rather than ask somebody else to do it though so I can get all the details! Even if I don’t lift the block, I won’t report you for block evading or anything.

“You used to be kidheart friendly and now you’re not, why’s that?”

Sadly, Raven (the creator of Kidhearts) has proven to be a bully sympathizer and feels it’s okay to compare agere to kinks/cgl and sides with regressionuncensored. She condones bullying/harassment/the sexualization of minors and I am not nor will ever be okay with that.

“But Raven sai-”

I don’t care what she says. She made it abundantly clear that she supports regressionuncensored and I don’t care that it came back to bite her in the ass. Bullies deserve no support, no sympathy, no nothing. And if you side with her than don’t come near this blog. This is agere safe and I will not allow people who support sexualizing it to interact. Kidhearts WILL be blocked on the spot, no questions asked.

“I’ve left a community on the dni list, can I follow/interact?”

Yes!

“Why are you anti-(insert thing on blacklist here)?”

Camp Camp: It’s racist + antisemitic

Dragon Maid: It’s pedophilic

Killing Stalking: It’s homophobic, ableist, sexist, perpetuates rape culture, and fetishizes abuse

Your Lie in April: It romanticizes child abuse and it literally starts off with a gross pedo joke when we meet the love interest in episode one

Split: It’s ableist

Hetalia: It’s antisemitic

Harry Potter/J.K. Rowling’s works: Actually there’s nothing inherently bad about the story. I just don’t like it. HOWEVER: I can’t stand J.K. Rowling as she’s a TERF/overall LGBT+phobe, and racist. So none of her creations will be featured here.

Sonic Boom: Nothing inherently problematic. I just can’t stand the show because it just fuckin sucks

13 Reasons Why: It romanticizes suicide and the creators refused to listen to actual mental health experts and have made the show potentially dangerous to anyone who even slightly deals with suicidal thoughts/urges

Detroit Become Human: It’s racist + antisemitic

Voltron: Legendary Defender: It queerbaits/it’s LGBT+phobic

“REG is a transphobic term”

I, Mod Joker, am trans. Try again.

“A-specs aren’t LG-”

*buzzer sound* wrong. So sad for you

“You’re not LGBT+ because you DARED disagree with me because you actually acknowledged that tumblr didn’t credit the community sweaty uwu”

We get this shit because a lot of you assume I’m ace or at the very least a-spec. And… Ya couldn’t be far from it. I’m a pan, genderfluid trans man. Even with all your gatekeeper (sorry, BULLSHIT) logic; I’d still be attracted to multiple genders and not be cis. I’m p queer. So no matter which way you slice it, I’m part of LGBT+. Die mad about it.

“You’re comparing aphobes to TERFs and SWERFs you fucking transphobe!”

Wow I didn’t realize setting boundaries meant that I viewed y'all in the EXACT same light. I’m so glad I have the lovely aphobes that have told my friends that they should kill themselves to set me straight.

Asking people not to interact doesn’t inherently mean I think they’re the EXACT same thing.

“Mod Joker is a gif-thief and reposts people’s content without properly crediting them!”

I have made this entire post explaining that’s wrong. Idrc if the post is too lengthy for you. Don’t talk shit if you don’t even have all the details.

Additionally, if you send me somethin about this in a negative light I’m IP blocking you. One strike and you’re out. If you want to believe people with false info and false accusations then that’s your baggage. Not mine.

HOWEVER if I’ve accidentally mis-credited, forgot to/messed up on crediting a person for their gif/video, or so on let me know! I’ll make mistakes, but I never do it intentionally.

#I realized the last link was a bit outdated anyway so whatever #this should help at least!#asks #anon #Mod Joker

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harkasun · 7 years ago

Text

Okayy so I recently ruined my life by watching like 14 years of a tv show in less than a month. So now, yes, I sold my soul to the one and only supernatural fandom (courtesy of @downworlderss)

I just got a couple of remarks for this show and none of it had any structure or order so here we go.

*MASSIVE SPOILER WARNING IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN ALL THE SEASONS*

This show fucking ruined me, binge-watched seasons 1-12 in about 4 weeks, my pinterest board had over 700 pins in like a week afterwards

It started off genuinely creepy and then kinda digressed and idk if I just got desensitised or what

John Winchester is a terrible father

Bobby Singer is an amazing father

I was really confused when season 5 ended because I still had 6 more dvds (and season 12 on amazon prime cause I couldn’t get the freaking dvd because being British sucks sometimes) and I thought it was ending at season 5 because DEAN WAS FINALLY HAPPY DAMNIT

It was about season 7 when I got a new pair of glasses ‘cause my eyesight got worse and made the realisation that JENSEN ACKLES HAS FRECKLES WHAT

Called it that Chuck was God from the moment I saw him- he literally fucking told them he was a god come onnn

Dean’s contact name for Castiel in season 11 or 12 or whatever better be a fucking joke because it’s Cas not Cass

I thought I couldn’t hate Metatron more and then he goes and spells his name with a double S and I decided he needed to die

The subtitles also say Cass (on amazon anyway) and.. just no, okay? It’s CAS

Cried when Cas killed Balthazar

Kevin’s life went to absolute shit and idk if it was terrifying or hilarious

THE FRIENDSHIP BETWEEN J2 AND MISH IRL YES

Naomi is actually the worst, why do more people not hate on her? She tortured Cas and I am not okay with that I was happier when she died than when Metatron did I’m not joking

Sam kinda breaks my heart

THE WINCHESTER RELATIONSHIP SAM AND DEAN HAVE SUCH BROTHERLY COMPASSION DIE FOR EACH OTHER ALWAYS

Gadreel was decent, okay? I think I genuinely liked him and I don’t care.

I mean I know he killed Kevin but still

CROWLEY OWNS THE FREAKING MOON

Cas, honey, you’re a wonderful person/angel but mannn do you fuck up sometimes, I mean seriously

Misha Collins is a fucking incredible human being and his acting skills give me goosebumps I’m deadly serious. What with Cas and Crazy!Cas and Castifer and Godstiel and Levi!Cas and MetaMisha I have so much respect for this man and he is a national treasure.. of America.. damnit

I threw something when Charlie died

Lucifer is actually really cute (mainly just when he’s in Sam’s head though) but yeah, I think I love satan is this an issue

Okay but sometimes it hits me that Jared and Jensen and Misha are just three middle-aged dads running around pretending to stab things and smite demons I think that’s beautiful

I think I cried when the angels fell I can’t remember

Fuck Adam, I don’t care about him honestly- if he comes back he’s gonna be a crazy bitch- we should all just forget about him like the boys did

I’m pretty sure Mary Winchester is actually a terrible mother

Jody Mills is a fucking incredible mother, she’s like mum bobby

Season 12 made me hate my own nationality because THE BRITISH MEN OF LETTERS CAN GO FUCK THEMSELVES OKAY I was so happy when the freedomsquad rolled in with their whiskey and flannel and UGHH it was so good to see Britain fall, okay?

Apart from Mick, he was okay… before he died

Okay, but the season 12 finale

I WAS SOBBING FOR A SOLID 14 MINTUES

I HAD TO LEAVE MY HOUSE I WALKED UNTIL I DIDN’T KNOW WHERE I WAS

TURNED OUT I WALKED 6 MILES FROM MY HOUSE SO I HAD TO WALK 6 MILES BACK

12 MILES BECAUSE OF CAST-FUCKING-IEL

Dean’s reaction made me wanna throw myself off a bridge

I didn’t even care about the Nephilim by that point

Just Cas’s relationship w/ Dean (I am neutral ground between platonic and destiel atm) but whatever you think you cannot deny that these two fucking love each other and it’s just so damn beautiful

JIMMY NOVAK IS THE BEST FATHER IN THIS THING

The Novak storyline just makes me cry

Lucifer Cas was genuinely disturbing at times but this fucking line is now my life

Actually so many things Castifer says and just the way Misha portrays all of the alter egos. It’s just amazing.

When we’re introduced to Levi!Cas Misha freaking Collins wtf how do you do that crazy thing with your eyes that makes you look like a completely different person

When Dean calls Cas his brother and says ‘i want you to know that’ is so fucking important to me because this wonderful being has been hunted by his angel brothers and sisters and Dean Winchester does not idly throw around a word like brother this scene was so special

Assbutt

Castiel’s wings scorched onto the ground just hit me so fucking hard and goddamnit it I can’t deal with that because he’s actually dead

Just… Castiel

-I’ll probably think of a load more this show man…

UPDATE:

HOW THE FRICKATY FRACK DID I FORGET GABRIEL

The car scene with Gabe and Cas and the parallels between them and the Winchester boys

BITCH PLEASE YOU’VE BEEN GOD MORE OFTEN THAN DAD HAS

I don’t think I stressed Balthazar enough because his death and the fact that Cas did it killed me.. and him

Crowley crowley crowley crowley

These boys are frustrating as fuck sometimes get your damn feelings sorted out you are brothers for fucks sake love each other always

It’s just when they’re like ‘oh we can’t be brothers anymore how could you do that to me’ and I’m sat there thinking ‘YOU LITERALLY DID THE SAME EXACT THING TO HIM LAST FUCKING SEASON COME ON’

Alsooo when Cas is Castifer everyone just seems to forget that, hello, CAS IS BEING POSSESSED BY LUCFIER DO YOU WANNA KEEP HIM SAFE IS HE YOUR FRIEND OR WHAT. And then Dean goes ‘what about Cas’ and I’m marginally satisfied

This scene

LOVED THIS SCENE

I always love Lucifer until he goes after Cas and then I hate Lucifer and when he’s doing something else I love him again

This is not devil worship

Sam’s exasperation and the bitch face is honestly so funny to me I have no idea

SASSTIEL

The fact that Cas thinks so little of himself that the only way he believes he can be ‘of use’ to the boys is BY ENDLESSLY SACRIFICING HIMSELF

STOP CAS

YOU’RE FUCKING LOVED

Also the way Dean screams Cas’s name and how Sam has to drag him back through the portal to their side in the season 12 finale PFFFH don’t even get me started

So is Gabe alive or what?

So is Cas alive or what?

SO AM I ALIVE OR WHAT

UPDATEUPDATE

The storyline with Hannah and Cas was SO uncomfortable

Like, they’re literally siblings and the whole weird half-romantic subplot was just... ergh

I’m so fucking hyped for season 13, give me scooby-doo spn and I sure hope it’s Gabriel because, honestly, who else would put them in scooby-doo, pleaseeee give me richard speight jr

I’ve been reading a ton of fanfic, this has ruined me. There’s this wonderful author on fanfic.net called 29pieces who does amazing fics and they’re my life now

Cas’s eyes yes please give me the sky

Spn is creepy ass monsters and traumatizing characters and heartbreaking scenes

But sometimes they just throw in a crack episode and they keep me sane, honestly. I would be in a limitless pool of tears if not for the crack eps and the gag reels

THE GAG REELS

THIS IS ONE OF MY FAVOURITES HE GOES FROM CAS TO MISHA IN LIKE A SINGLE SECOND

Back to sadness

CAS’S FACE AFTER METATRON SAYS ‘he’s dead too’

And he sees dean’s blood on the angel blade

HEARTBREAKING NO THANK YOU

SEASON 9. MAKES. ME. SO ANGRY. HOW DARE SAM AND DEAN HUNT WHILE CAS IS HOMELESS AND COLD AND A L O N E

I’m so sad about Cas being homeless because Misha and oh my god

Future!Cas also makes me sad because I know it’s funny and all to see Cas high but thinking about the road that led him there is not

Thinking about Cas’s depression that led him to drug abuse keeps me up at night

I NEED CHUCK TO TELL CAS HE’S HIS FAVOURITE BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY PLEASE

My angel feels inadequate and I cannot handle that today

Everything about Cas just makes me sad

#supernatural #dean winchester #sam winchester #Castiel #jensen ackles #misha collins #jared padalecki #lucifer #naomi #john winchester #mary winchester #gadreel #charlie bradbury #kevin tran #crowley #i'm ruined #emotional wreck #i hope you're happy

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bnheadcanons-scenarios · 7 years ago

Text

Rare Pair Week Day 2: Bakery

I...actually did two days in a row? Sweet! Sorry I promise I’ll get back to requests tomorrow!

For @bnhararepairweek

Read on AO3

Day 2: Bakery

Pairing: TodoBaku (Todoroki x Bakugou)

Title: Smells like Home

Summary: Todoroki promised that he’d go to Uraraka’s new bakery. He expected it to be a good experience and, well, things don’t always go as planned

Word Count: 1190

Todoroki was standing outside of a newly opened bakery, admiring the sign that read Uravity Goods. He contemplated whether or not he actually had time to go inside but then he remembered the promise he made to Midoriya. He sighed and opened the door, hearing a soft chime of the bell as the door opened.

The first thing he noticed was the smell. He’s always enjoyed the smell of warm breads and pastries because it always brought back fond memories of his mother. His heart sank to his stomach as his mind filled with memories of her.

“Oi! Are you gonna fucking order something or just stand there like a damn fish outta water?” Todoroki was snapped out of his thoughts at the harsh voice. He blinked a few times at the man behind the counter. Todoroki didn’t answer right away, instead taking in the image of red eyes, blonde hair, and pretty well-developed biceps. He saw the other cock his eyebrow in annoyance.

“Me?”

The other just scowled deeper, leaning over the counter with his elbows on the counter top, “Do you see anyone else here just standing there like a goddamn dumbass.”

“Do you always speak to the customers like that?” The blonde seemed to be taken aback by his statement temporarily, obviously not used to people not submitting to his angry tone. After the momentary shock dissipated, he went back to scowling only this time, Todoroki could feel a threatening aura emanate from him.

“LISTEN HERE YOU MOTHERFUCKING PIECE OF SHI-oof.” He was cut off when a short brunette smacked him on the back of the head with a sheet tray, causing him to clutch the spot with his hand and let out a groan before turning to her. “GODDAMN YOU STUPID FUCKING DOUCHE-DICK I’LL KILL YOU!”

“Yeah yeah whatever Bakugou. Nothing I haven’t heard before not stop being rude to the customers!” She turned to Todoroki and her face lit up, ignoring the man’s – Bakugou’s – complaints and colorful language. “Hey Todoroki! Long time no see! Sorry about this idiot but it’s part of his charm believe it or not.”

“It’s fine. It’s nice to see you again Uraraka,” he bowed his head slightly and went to look at the different pastries in the display cases. He felt eyes follow his movements and tried to ignore it.

“Whatever you want is on the house! I have to get back to the ovens.”

“Or you can fucking let me back there so I don’t have to deal with any bitch ass people anymore.”

“Nope you’re still being punished! See ya Todoroki!”

He looked up and gave a small nod in her direction before walking back to the counter. “Just a blueberry scone please.” Bakugou grunted in reply and went to get the pastry for him. Todoroki shifted awkwardly where he stood. “So, what are you getting punished for?”

Bakugou threw the bag with the pastry on the counter before glaring at the other. “None of your fucking business.”

Todoroki shrugged before grabbing the bag, giving a small nod to Bakugou, and walking out of the shop, the only thought in his mind was about how interesting that encounter was.

Todoroki went back every day after that though he doesn’t really know why. Most of the time he would grab a pastry to go but occasionally he would buy a coffee and a treat and sit at one of the booths to read. No matter what time of day he went, he never saw the blonde again. Most of the time it was Uraraka that was dealing with customers but other times there was another girl, Mina he thought he heard Uraraka call her at one point, that was there instead.

He never asked about Bakugou though, not wanting to seem like he was going there to see him again. Though, now that he thinks about it, that might be the reason. He still doesn’t really know why but he does know that the blond intrigues him.

He was lost in thought as he entered the shop, hearing the familiar bell and walking up to the counter without paying much attention to why was standing behind the register. He didn’t look up as he reached into his pocket to grab some bills as he ordered his usual blueberry scone. He did look up, however, when he heard a scoff and a familiar voice chastising him.

“Are you just that much of an asshole you can’t even respect service workers by fucking looking at them?”

He just gaped at Bakugou for a moment before he let out a quiet sorry as he felt his face heat up. Bakugou only clicked his tongue in response before walking away momentarily. Todoroki gave him the money in exchange for the food. “So, did you get punished again?”

Bakugou glared at him and slammed the register drawer. “Here’s your fucking change, Halfie.” He practically threw the coins into Todoroki’s hand. He pocketed the change and decided to sit at his usual booth instead of leaving like his original plan was. Again, he could feel Bakugou’s eyes watch him as he saw, feeling slightly uncomfortable under his gaze.

A few more customers came in while he was sat there and he watched Bakugou deal with each of them. It shocked him, though, that Bakugou was slightly nicer to everyone. Sure, he still wore his signature scowl, but he controlled his language and tone, especially around any children that came through.

Bakugou finished with the last customer and grabbed a wet rag from the sink before walking around and wiping off tables. Todoroki could hear quiet grumbles coming from the blonde but couldn’t make out anything he was saying.

“So you can be a decent human being? I’m impressed,” he teased when Bakugou started to wipe the table next to him.

“Shut the fuck up asshole.” He hit Todoroki’s shoulder with the towel, causing him to laugh lightly. He also noticed that Bakugou’s cheeks were dusted slightly pink at the teasing.

“Are you ever going to tell me how you angered Uraraka? It’s very hard to make her mad.”

“I don’t have to tell you shit. We aren’t friends dumbass.”

Todoroki thought for a moment before standing up and extending a hand. “I’m Todoroki Shouto.”

Bakugou just stared at the hand in confusion before ignoring him completely and going back to wiping down tables. Todoroki just slowly lowered his arm and instead grabbed a napkin and a pen, writing down his contact information. He walked over and tapped Bakugou on the shoulder, shoving the napkin in the other’s hand before he could reject it. Bakugou uncrumpled the paper and glanced at it.

“The fuck is this for?”

“It’s my phone number if you’re interested in being friends.”

“And why the fuck would I ever want to be friends with a shit like you?”

Todoroki shrugged before grabbing his stuff and going to exit the bakery, expecting Bakugou to throw away the napkin and already planning on coming back the next day.

What he didn’t see was Bakugou pocketing the paper before going back to work.

#bnhararepairweek #bnhararepairweek fic #todoroki shouto #bakugou katsuki #todoroki x bakugou #todobaku #my fic #scenario #my scenario #bnha scenarios #fic #bnha #my hero academia #my writing #not request #rare pair #bnha rare pair

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aviationfiction · 7 years ago

Text

XXII

Dante St. James

Exhilarating.

Intoxicating.

Addictive.

I’ve never felt anything as silky, velvety, and luscious against my skin until she meshed her supple lips into mine to create an unparalleled harmony between our mouths. The feel of her nails digging into the flesh of my neck enticed me; nearly beyond control, and I was left at her mercy as her flawless frame pinned itself to my own. Not to be outdone, I locked her into my arms and changed our positions so she was the one pinned against the elevator’s stainless steel walls instead of me. I’d poured every aspect of myself into that kiss; my tongue being the enforcer of my emotions and affections for the woman I was sharing it with. My hands relentlessly caressed, brushed over, and lightly grasped every accessible part of her, including the plumpness behind her that I so often find my staring at no matter what she’s wearing.

Time halted.

The world suddenly felt like a playground for only two souls and we’d lost ourselves into one another without care or concern of our location and it’s surroundings. In my blatant staring at Autumn as she enjoyed herself mostly with Mike and all of his antics, I realized that I undoubtedly have never set my eyes on anything or anyone more beautiful than she is. I thought I’d been a fool to believe that when I saw her for the second time as she formally greeted me at BlueStar. I’ve been to multiple countries, set my sights on mountains whether they were desert rocky or snow covered, seen the blues of the oceans, and most of all, walked amongst people from all of the world while taking in their similarities, differences, unique capabilities, and intriguing cultural backgrounds and yet this one woman superseded all of it. The essence of her soul is the embodiment of what it means to be genuine and her nurturing nature has not only entranced me, but has also been caring for my mind, body, and spirit since we’ve gravitated towards one another. She’s within my thoughts when I open my eyes every morning, implemented into my plans and schedule no matter how light or strenuous it is, and who I prefer to be around whenever time permits it…and even when it doesn’t.

I’ve seen a ton of films, read some of the greatest novels, and studied the works of the worlds greatest poets and writers. I’m not a discriminatory reader nor do I use my gender to limit my interests. I’ve taken in many different aspects of what romance is. Most importantly, I’ve had my attempts with it. Though unsuccessful, I’ve quietly sought for the undeniable heart to heart, mind to mind, and soul to soul tie to another human being who is perfectly suited for myself. In yearning for the emotional, I’ve tested out the physical aspects of it and though the climaxes came, the emptiness that followed took a blow to my gut time after time. In all of the kisses I’ve had over my nearly thirty years of living, none of them stimulated every aspect of myself in the manner that the one I had in the wee hours of this morning did. I nearly felt embarrassed as the chills followed by goosebumps, warmth followed by arousal, and the sparks followed by an endless need engulfed me and engraved the moment and her into my mind forever. A man my age was already supposed to have experienced all of that and tons more and yet here I am, nearly feeling like my purity is still in tact, and yet so pleased to know good things actually do come to those who wait.

“Yo!” I glance to the right of myself to give Mike the attention that he’d most likely been egging for for a couple of seconds and the look of confusion and agitation on his face matched the expression he’d given me just fifteen minutes ago.

“What’s up with you? You keep zoning out. This was a no for me as soon as we stepped inside. Fred’s not feeling it. Are you on board with that? Is it a no for you as well?”

He extended his arms outward to signify the space we were standing in and I turned in a complete circle to scan it’s perimeters once more and shook my head. Nothing about it drew any interest from me. Though I’m sure we could hire a contracting company for major renovations, consult with upscale interior design teams, and use our own expertise to turn this property into exactly what we’re looking for, I still don’t think it’d be enough. The square footage is odd. We pride our properties on intimacy and what we’re standing in is a social killer. Vegas is all about the glitz and glam; the grand nightclubs specifically constructed to make everyone feel like they’re someone of importance once they step past those velvet ropes. We’ve never cared for that style of ambiance and I’d rather we not start.

“Yeah, I’m on board with that decision. This is a no.”

“Cool. Let’s get out of here. I’m starving.”

“What’s new?” Mike raised an eyebrow as I took a jab at his endless hunger and he smirked.

“We’re going to find out over lunch. Nothing new is going on over here on my end, but I’m positive that you can’t say the same brother.” He glanced over at Fred for a co-sign and received exactly what he was looking when he chuckled and nodded his head as confirmation for the both of them plotting to intrude on what they’ve been curious about since this morning.

“Whatever. Lets keep it light. I’m taking Autumn out to lunch.”

“You can keep it light. I’m eating a full damn meal. You can starve until you eat with your woman if you want.”

The light chuckles between the both of them filled my ears until we were at the very front of the vacant establishment thanking it’s owner for allowing us to do a walk through on such a short notice. Though we’d make appointments with the others, we were given information about this property while viewing a spot over on West Flamingo Road. Once we gave him a call, he immediately agreed to drop what he was in the middle of handling and meet us here. Though it’s not what we we’re looking for, I respect his ethic.

“Grand Lux Cafe?”

“Fine with me.” I’d always preferred the international brand off of the Cheesecake Factory over it’s originator in the first place. The dishes were a decent spin on the best European cafes and French bistros. Whenever I’m over in Jersey at Mike’s house, we’d shoot over to the one right by Garden State Plaza and grab a meal that suited whatever the time of the day it was. He goes there so much that nearly all of the waitresses knows who he is. I’m sure his endless filtration plays a part in it as well.

“I do have a taste for those crispy Thai shrimp and chicken spring rolls. I’m with it.”

Though we could have left the car parked and walked down to the restaurant, the Vegas heat had already drained a ton of energy out of our bodies since our two hours of being out in it, so we drove. If it were up to me, I’d be in a pair of basketball shorts and a t-shirt while maneuvering around in this dreadful weather, but I dressed up in simplistic khaki pants, a Polo golf style of shirt, and Stan Smith’s collaboration with Adidas for my footwear. It’s not the business attire I’m used to for meetings but I could have shown up in a Hawaiian style button up shirt, shorts, and a pair of sandals for all these sharks could care. Money talks much louder than anything I could ever put on my back.

“Are we going to need drinks? Between you zoning out and that flustered expression on your face, I think alcohol might be needed.”

“Man, shut up.”

“So what happened after y'all left last night?” Fredrick cut straight to it just like I knew he would. He hadn’t even picked up his menu yet.

“Damn. Can we get the drinks first? Can we order the food?”

“I already know what I want. I want a Heineken and the Pastrami Burger. If I’m not too full, I’ll get the beignets for dessert. As a matter of fact, we can get them and share those shits.”

“Okay Mr. Prepared. I’m going with the Baked Rigatoni. Mai Tai for me. Jon B, what you getting?” A smirked danced along my lips and I couldn’t help but to laugh at yet another one of his cheap jabs at my complexion. He’s about the only person that I let get away with that.

“Crab cakes. Side of fries I guess. Mai Tai for me as well.”

“Good. That shit has four rums in it and you need all four of them to take you off of the edge of whatever you and Autumn were doing in that bed.”

“Sleeping? That’s what we did in that bed, Mike.”

“Aye man. You don’t have to be modest or lie to me. It’s just me, your best friend, shit, your brother. Y'all are two grown and single people. There’s nothing wrong with the pokey pokey.” Drips of water trickled down the sides of Fredrick’s mouth area as he failed to contain his budding laughter at Mike’s ridiculousness. “From the way you were staring at her last night, I figured you were bound to go for it. You looked like your damn head was about to explode.”

“There’s nothing wrong with the what?” His question to further Mike’s antics was followed with loud laughter.

“The pokey pokey.” Before I could knock down his assumption yet again, the waitress returned to the table for our order and my talkative best friend’s flirtation. What makes it amusing is he’s never serious about it. About ninety percent of the time he’s just playing around for either a reaction or a giggle out of whichever woman is wearing her uniform skirt too short or the pants too tight. It’s been his thing to do since we were teenagers and it’s not changing any time soon. I look forward to the day when he’s married and he has to resist doing it so that his wife won’t chew his head off. I’d pay to see that sight.

“Alright, the food and drinks are ordered. Now we small talk until it’s time to eat. Dante, the floor is yours. Well, the table. What happened?”

“The driver took us back to the hotel and were just talking the whole time. Autumn had a bit more to drink than I did so she was tipsy. Not drunk. She was walking and talking just fine, no slurred speech, and literally everything she said made sense. I’ve or rather we’ve been working in the nightclub business long enough to know when a person is wasted.”

“Yeah, she was sipping those zombies moderately until Fredrick started talking to her. I saw her gulp down the last drink she had. What did you or she say?” Mike turned his head to look at him and he shook his own nonchalantly.

“We were just having a casual conversation. Trivial. It’s really not important. Dante, continue.”

“So, we walked through the lobby talking, I called for the elevator, and as soon as it came, I stepped on first. She was apprehensive; I’m assuming now that I think about it. She was standing in-between the doors for a couple of seconds, just staring at me, and I took it upon myself to grab her waist and pull her inside so the doors would close. By now, she’s standing directly in front of me and I asked her if she had a good time. She never answered that and instead mentioned that I have a high tolerance for alcohol and I admitted that I hadn’t had that much to drink. From there, I randomly started talking about the club itself and she wasn’t listening to me. I could tell because her eyes were lowered and staring at exactly what she was going to go for next; my lips. I don’t know, Fred, I felt like this jolt of astonishment, relief, lust, and need all at once. It was the wildest feeling I’ve ever experienced and I don’t know if I should feel embarrassed or crazy for saying that.” I expected a few giggles and even those witless glances between the two of them but instead they sat there in silence accessing what happened between Autumn and I just as much as I was. Fredrick slightly slouched himself down and dropped his head back in as subtle shock while Mike took a sip of his water and awaited the rest of the details.

“A peck?”

“No. It was intense and potent. My hands were exploring every aspect of her curves as I pinned her to the wall of that elevator.”

“Tongue?” Mike’s eyes widened.

“Yes, man. Feeling. Grabbing.” I gulped down the knot in my throat. “Gripping.”

“Oh shit.” Fred mustered up a small smirk and he nodded his head in pride at the last verb I’d mentioned. I still can’t believe I did that myself. My hands went from resting on the small of her back to sliding down over the thick flesh below it. My subtle aggression was the cause of her moaning against my mouth and that only further enticed me to want and need more from her. My mind had gone beyond the moment. My eyes were tightly shut closed as she savored my mouth and yet I was fantasizing about my own nibbling at the most sacred part of her flesh. That embellished black dress that was such a sight to see suddenly become nothing more than a layer of inconvenience keeping me from what I yearned and damn near ached for.

“We were so caught up in the kiss that we hadn’t realized the elevator was called back downstairs to the lobby. We left this older couple mortified. Though we pulled apart and attempted to regain our composure in record time, they were so disgusted that they wouldn’t even get on. They just waited for the next one.” They’d finally had something to laugh at and wasted no time in doing so at the expense of Autumn and my embarrassment.

“Sounds like some teenager shit man. That’s hilarious.”

“It felt like it. Shit, it felt like my mom walked in on me or something along those lines.” I couldn’t help but to chuckle about it. Maybe it was the liquor but Autumn thought it was hilarious and had I not grabbed her waist and locked her at my side, she would have continued that kiss with no regard for their presence.

“And how did she end up in your bed?”

“I invited her to come up and watch a movie since she said she wasn’t tired. We just did it in the bedroom instead of sitting out in that common area. About ten minutes into the movie, she started falling asleep so I took her boots off and pulled the covers up over her. After turning off the TV, I got back in the bed, she kissed me goodnight, and we went to sleep. Nothing sexual happened.”

“A goodnight kiss as well? Well that’s a nice touch on things. She’s pretty bold. That must have been something that she’s been wanting to do for a while and finally just decided to give in. That wasn’t liquor or some random and impulsive act. If it was, she would have been embarrassed as hell after doing it and there wouldn’t have been a movie night in your bed or a goodnight kiss. She would have left you on that elevator and went about her business.” Fredrick’s statement was what I already believed. I’d been thinking about it while readying myself earlier and making sure not to awaken her as she peacefully laid there entangled in the sheets. I could feel the tension between us as we stood there on the peak for a while talking and eventually just basking in one another’s presence on the hue of the stars. I figured it’d be unspoken for and ignored much like it’s been for a little while now because I’ve been hesitant to address that elephant in the room and I’ve doubted that she’s ready to due to all of the circumstances in her life. The concept of the right time held so much conflict and complexity until that kiss. Now I’m left to wonder what’s next.

“And that opens up the floor for the what’s next question. What’s next?”

We took a pause when our waitress approached the table with the drinks and I gulped down just about half of the Mai Tai as I used as much mental capacity as I could to figure out an answer to that question. What’s next can’t be what I want because what I want contains plenty of greed.

“I don’t know. That’s a question that I don’t know how to answer.”

“Well, what do you want? Start there. You obviously want her. That’s been obvious since damn near the beginning. So right now, at this moment, in what manner do you want her?” Leave it to Mike to continue to push for depth with difficult questions to answer.

“I don’t know. There’s a part of me that feels like what I want is understandable and justified while there’s another part of me that feels like I need to take a step back and allow her to make that decision and to take whatever time that she needs to do so. I don’t want her to feel like I’m forcing her hand or disregarding what she just went through with her ex-husband. I don’t know what she’s ready for and I’d rather not make her burdens any heavier than they already are. The last thing she needs is pressure. Maybe she’s not ready to date or be in a relationship. If that’s the case, I can’t fault her for that no matter what disappointment that may inflict upon me. I don’t know. This shit’s confusing. Maybe we can just go with the flow and see how things go. Don’t people do that when they’re trying to figure things out?”

“So you want to coast in a sense? You’d like to have something with her with no strings attached right now. There’s no commitment or title just yet, but there’s an understanding that there’s an attraction and you’re just seeing where things go.”

“That also means that we can be involved with other people. I don’t like the way that sounds.” Fredrick snickered once I shot down his analysis while Mike raised an eyebrow and shook his head.

“Possessive already? Damn. Okay, so you want an understanding and agreement that you two are exclusively seeing one another, but there’s no title on it. It’s just an understanding. That sounds better?” I took a couple of seconds to assess Mike’s version of Autumn and I’s next step and eventually shook my head.

“I don’t like the way that sounds, honestly.”

“Man, you want the commitment then. You want a relationship. You want titles; boyfriend and girlfriend. You want to be able to claim her and introduce her to people with the appropriate title and you want to be able to feel like she actually belongs to you instead of the situation you two have being up in the air because there’s nothing official about it.”

“Is that a bad thing?” Is it? I’d like to think it’s what’s right but how can I say that when I’ve yet to actually court her? I may be skipping over the actual process. Am I not supposed to allow her to feel me out over the course of a couple of dates and then make her decision? Maybe. I already feel like she’s felt me out and the time frame of dates is trivial. I can take her on a date every single day with her as my woman and court her just as much as I would if she wasn’t. None of that stops once the relationship is real. I want she and I to have a life outside of spending time together when we’re out of town due to my work obligations. I want to be able to be in New Jersey spending time with her just as much as I want her to be spending time in New York City with me. Every trip we take doesn’t have to be about business. She and Stacey are right when they say that I need a vacation, but I have no interest in traveling to some part of the world and doing so alone. That’s not a vacation; it’s isolation and I’ve had more than enough of that before Autumn made her mark. I’d also rather not feel like I can’t speak to her, see her, touch her, and show her affection unless we’re hundreds to thousands of miles away from those familiar with us by the way of relation or friendship. I may be a private person but I’m not secretive.

“No.” Their response was in unison.

“There’s nothing wrong with that. Shit, just hearing that come out of your mouth is super wild to me. I’ve been knowing you forever and I’ve never heard you sound this serious or invested about anyone. If that’s what you want, tell her that. If honesty has been an importance between the two of you thus far, then keep it that way and tell her what you feel and what you’d like. People get into relationships and still have to build. Neither one of y'all are running to a chapel any time soon nor are kids on your minds, so I don’t see what the big deal is.” Fredrick made it sound so simple, like he does with just about anything. He’s so smooth that he’d make you think jumping into a lion pit is as simple as taking a walk through a park. He rarely ever sweats over anything. The last time I seen the man stress out was over some fling of his mentioning a pregnancy and that eventually turned out to be negative result. Other than that, he’s as cool as a breeze and of course he’d believe that I’m supposed to have the same outlook on life.

“But I feel like I’m asking her for too much.”

“I don’t get it. You’re asking her for a commitment. Once you’re committed to someone, there’s a title on that. The way I see it, the only way that’s a big deal to her is if she wants to explore her options. Are you saying it’s too much because you believe that’s a possibility?” I could feel my stomach beginning to churn and suddenly every sip of the alcohol felt like a shot of fire tickling down my throat. I don’t have the answer to that question either. If I’m going by these couple of months we’ve spent together, I’d only be assuming that she’s not dating anyone or even considering it because she’s never spoken with me about that. If I look at it that way, I’m going to have to include myself into the equation of her lack of consideration. Maybe she does have options or is leaving the opportunity open for someone to step in but doesn’t want to let me know that. Women tend to be discreet with their dating lives and whatever is going on within their bedrooms because of male expectations and sexist fictitious laws crafted by men to keep them on leashes while we indulge in anything of our choosing. Autumn and I share a lot but I’m not Heather or Rachel. Women will always feel like those type of conversations are better suited for a female friend of theirs.

“I don’t know. Maybe. She’s newly single. Well, technically, her ex-husband’s been out of the picture for two years, but she’s newly single in terms of not being legally tied to anyone else and aside from all that she’s gone through in the midst of those two years, I know she was waiting until she and that guy were completely done and no longer tied to one another to move on with her life.” To soothe my throat, I took a sip of water and placed the glass along side the cocktail. “That’s honorable and I respect her for that. Now that she’s gotten that out of the way, whose to say that she wants to be tied to someone else so soon, you know? Maybe she is interested in seeing what’s out there.”

“Or maybe she’s not and she wants you. It’s been two years. That’s a long ass time man. I don’t care if she was still married and I mean that in non fucked up way. The man got involved with someone else, got engaged, and that woman is pregnant with his child. That happened within two years. No offense to her and the decision that she made but she didn’t owe him that. Yeah, there was a marriage license in tact but Autumn has been single for two years. I didn’t know there’s supposed to be some trial period or some type of wait period to date after divorcing someone. What kind of shit is that? Shit, if anything, he’s lucky. She could have went up in front of a judge during the divorce proceedings and hung his ass out to dry by claiming marital abandonment.” Mike’s lawyer talk earned a snicker out of Fred and he nodded his head in agreement with all that he’d said. “Talk to her and tell her what you feel. You’re never going to know until you do. Don’t be a bitch about this.”

“Shut up. I plan to. Today. I told the both of you that I’m taking her out to lunch. I also snagged tickets to the Boyz II Men residency so I’m going to take her to see that tonight. She’s extremely into R&B and soul music dating back all the way to the fifties so I know she’ll like that.”

“Boyz II Men concert with your girl? Cute shit man.”

“She’s not my girlfriend, Mike.”

“My momma tells me to always speak things into existence. Say it, claim it, believe it, then go and get it. Follow the rules pink boy. I’m speaking it into existence for you.”

“You might have to go ahead and get it for him too because I have a feeling he’s going to shrink up today.” Fredrick’s joke sparked up Mike’s annoyingly snide snicker and the both of them eyed me just to see if I would crack under the pressure. Though they’re sitting here encouraging me, that wouldn’t stop them from having a grand ol’ laugh at my expense if I do shrink up in front of Autumn this afternoon. I can admit, as Stacey as said, I’m absolutely a shark in the boardroom. I can handle business without breaking a sweat but romance? I’m an amateur. I’ve remained stagnant in that area because I’ve yet to encounter someone who mentally and emotionally impacted me to the point of wanting more, until now. Autumn is that and I’m ready to explore what it means to have a meaningful relationship. I’m never going to know if I don’t experience it first hand.

“I have it under control.”

“And don’t get drunk and end up in some Vegas chapel either. I know you’re turning thirty and she’s fine as hell but slow your roll. Y'all got time.”

“You’re going to have to chill with all of that she’s fine as hell shit.”

“She’s not your lady yet. Until she is, I’m letting these compliments blast off brother. I’ll stop when you make me stop. Good luck.”

Fredrick raised his glass in ode to me and we all shared a laugh as we eventually tapped out glasses to commemorate the positive outcome that we all seem to be hoping for. I wasn’t expecting our conversation to result in the depth that it did but to say that I appreciate the both of them would be an understatement. That was one of those big brothers and little brother moments that we occasionally share but this time it was about a topic that the both of them love just as much as any man would. I’d finally given them something outside of work and my dreadful family to be informative about and all that they said was useful. I’d been stuck in my head trying to figure it all out on my own since waking up this morning but they aided in putting it all into perspective. The only person missing is Stacey, who is an expert at getting into everyone’s head whether you want her to or not. She would have been able to assess the entire situation effortlessly, but we’ll save that for another day. When I return to New York, she’ll either show up at my apartment or the office to nag the hell out of me for the details that I know for a fact that Mike has already given her. If all goes well between Autumn and I, she’ll erupt into a ridiculously over exaggerated celebration and damn near marry me off and if it doesn’t, she’ll be there to pick me up no matter if I’m hurting or not. They’re my family and there isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t understand and cherish that.

“Oh and can you stay downstairs in her suite if y'all plan to celebrate with the pokey pokey? We’d rather be spared of those details.”

“Shut the fuck up Mike.”

My sweaty palms worsened during our walk through the hotel’s lobby and my ears drowned out just about everything happening around me, including yet another one of Mike’s rants about the high temperature outdoors. I considered going upstairs to our suite to truly figure out all that I would say to the woman who shook up my world in the wee hours of this morning but if I did go up there, I wouldn’t have come back down for a while and it would have resulted in me standing her up. No matter how many times I rubbed my hands down the sides of my pants and Fredrick squeezed my shoulders, I don’t think I’ll ever be as completely ready for this moment as I usually am for everything else. That’s the unpredictability of someone having partial control of your emotions. No matter what the outcome may be, I’ve already felt and learned so much. The difficult part is I’m already drawn her and the feelings that she evokes within me. Early on I feared it. Now I want nothing more than to immerse myself into her world.

“Get it together man.” I mumbled the words to myself as my knuckles tapped against the door to her suite. The taps were so minimal, I knew for a fact that she didn’t hear them. I did that for the sake of gathering my myself and finally knocked like any normal person would.

“I kind of thought you’d be back a little later. I know you all had a decent number of properties to look at.” She opened up the door with that statement already coming out of her mouth and my eyes immediately panned down to the mauve strapless romper and how it’s silhouette hugged every aspect of her curves that it could possibly cover. The floral design made it playful and yet the open back and the matching choker she wore on her neck gave it the spice that represents a part of her that tempts me like no other. Her hair being pulled back into a tight low ponytail left her breathtaking face to effortlessly outshine every other part of her and the natural make up pulled it all in for what she displays everyday: perfection.

“We saw all of them. We hated all except one which is why it went so quickly. There were some that were literal turn offs upon entry and there were others that we took our times walking through, but ultimately one of them garnered equal interest from all three of us.” I closed the door behind myself and slowly followed behind her as she headed in the direction of the master bedroom. My eyes couldn’t pull away from the sight if someone paid me their life savings to do so.

“What did you like about it?”

“It’s just about the same size as Baraya. Slightly smaller but it’s the atmosphere that we care about most. If we were interested in opening up one of those grand nightclubs like Drais, Hakkasan or Omnia, we would have done it a long time ago. We just want a place where people can actually come together and have a good meal and a good time at as well. Some choose to do either or. It doesn’t matter. It just needs to have the right vibe and that one property was near it but it needs some work.”

“Is the property worth the investment?”

“We’re still looking at the logistics but no final decisions are being made just yet. We’re going to wait it out and see if we come across anything else we favor.”

“That sounds fair enough. There’s no point in immediately investing into any property after seeing it for the first time. Take some time, look at others, check out the paper work, and come back to see it a second time as well. Is it on the strip?”

“Yeah, what you’re saying is right and it is on the strip.”

I stood in the doorway of the bedroom as she walked to and from the bathroom accessorizing herself. Her last trip inside of it resulted in her coating her lips with a nude lipstick.

“Which ones? Sandals or the Converses?” She held them up for me to see and I quickly pointed at the heeled sandals as their long laces dangled in front of her. The Converses would have been just as nice, but the heels were quietly for my viewing pleasure. They add another hundred levels to her already off the meters sex appeal.

“Did you eat anything?”

“I had a fruit parfait but in a bowl though with almonds in it. It was really good. I had it like an hour ago.” My follow up response flat lined as I watched her concentrate on carefully lasting up the sandals to her liking. There seemed to be a method to the madness that I didn’t quite understand because she was far more precise and exact than I expected her to be. When she finished and compared her second attempt, they were aligned as she needed them to be.

“We’re going to Due Forni Pizza & Wine for lunch.”

“Sounds good. It’s by here?”

“No. It’s actually like twenty five minutes away. We still have the Jeep, so I figured it’d be a nice little ride. What do you think? I can pick a place closer if you want.”

“No. I’d love to go on the ride. There’s more to Vegas than just the strip, so I’m glad you chose a place away from here.” She stood to her feet, grabbed her purse off of the bed, placed it’s strap on her shoulder, and she glanced in my direction. “Okay, I’m ready. Luckily you came here just in time for me to be ready. I didn’t have you waiting like yesterday.”

“I don’t mind waiting.”

“Yeah, right. You say that now.” Her giggle was light.

“Sexy. Very sexy.” I used my finger to point from the top of her head to the very tips of her toes and she sighed and full on laughed while shaking her head.

“You seem to think that everything I wear is sexy.”

“That’s accurate.”

“No it’s not but I can’t speak for you. All I can do is thank you. You look good yourself. I love it when you’re all suited up and yet I really love it when you’re casual. I can’t choose. That just means you look great at all times.”

“I appreciate that.”

She double checked her purse for the room key and I led the both of us our of her suite and down the hall to the elevator. Once the doors shut and confined us within the small space, I peered over at the overwhelming sight who was standing to the left of me tapping away at the screen of her phone. She has the height and figure of a runway model and yet she has this subtle thickness to her shape that truly takes form in her hips and thighs. Her legs are beyond comparison; making her stride graceful. Her facial beauty is so unique and striking; unlike anything or anyone I’ve ever seen before. She often makes fun of her forehead but it suits her so much. She has the eyes of a feline and their green color weakens me whenever I dare to stare into them. Her lips, the sight and feel of them; a dream.

God showed off with her.

“Are you going to use the valet?” My lip slowly eased from in between my teeth as she looked up at me and I quickly nodded my head.

“Yes. We have to wait in the front just like yesterday.”

Our wait wasn’t as long as I expected it to be. We stood along side one another no longer than ten minutes until the valet pulled up directly in front of the entrance. I helped Autumn into the passenger side of the car and put her seat belt on myself before getting in on the drivers side. She chose to use the Bluetooth to stream a nineties and early two thousands Hip-Hop playlist from Spotify and we were off just seconds after. Initially, we were in silence. She tapped her fingers against her lap in a nervous manner and I couldn’t fault her because I too felt the same as my hands gripped the steering wheel and my mind switch from thought to thought over and over again. Nas was our ice breaker. I took his verses of “If I Ruled The World” while she took Lauryn’s silky and infectious hook. Our heads bopped in unison while her rocking body made competition for the road. Song after song, I found myself stealing glances at her. I was paying less attention to the records and more so to her as she rapped along to literally every song. Lil Kim’s records excited her more than any of the others. I thought she’d morphed into Kim herself during her verse on Player’s Anthem. Her ponytail blew with the warm wind coming from the lowered windows and she used her hands to put emphasis on every word that came out of her mouth.

“Might have to change your name from Peaches to Lil’ Peaches.”

“Shut up! I love Kim. I was actually able to hang out with her a couple of times because she was good friends with Shane. Don’t ask me how my brother became such a good friend of hers because I truly don’t know. That man knew every damn body. He was loved.”

“Your brother had an interesting mind. It’s not surprising that so many people gravitated towards him. His book is a great read for young adults. It’s truly a guide to take you through the twenties. I appreciate that about it.” Her smile wasn’t solemn. Instead, it was one of pride and she nodded her head to confirm all that I’d said as accuracy.

“Absolutely. I remember when he was writing it. He started writing that book before he even hit his twenties. He’d hang all over New York City and have conversations with anyone he encountered to gain their perspectives on life. He was a life enthusiast and it showed in his free spirited nature. A liberal to the core too. That’s why he and Issac clashed so much. I loved everything about him.”

“I can tell he was special to you just as I know you were as special to him. He dedicated his book to you.”

“He wrote the book for me. That’s what he told me, so I’m going to have to believe it. He said to me my beautiful baby doll, this book is a guide for you to live your young adulthood to the fullest and I wrote it so you’ll know that no matter what you choose to do, I love you and it’ll be alright. I think I’m at the chapters about failure. Well, maybe I’m a little past it and getting to the part of picking back up and trekking on.”

“That’s one of the best parts.” Her eyes locked on me and she slightly dropped her head to the right.

“Of the book or life?”

“Both. Life because you’ve learned so much and you’re applying that to better yourself. There are people who don’t do that and end up creating a toxic cycle of screwing up but not you. You don’t carry yourself that way.”

“That’s true. I think for me, I don’t want anything more than to have an onslaught of joy in everything that I conquer. That’s it. Nothing will ever be perfect and I don’t want it to be because it’s not realistic and that’s boring. I like challenges. Overall, I want the joy though. Not happiness, joy. Happiness is based upon temporary pleasures and even some permanent ones, but joy is all about the sense of self. It’s true acceptance. You know, I’d say I need both.”

“Having both is a healthy balance.”

“What makes you happy?

“Currently?”

“Yes.” As I made a left into the parking lot of the restaurant I quickly glanced over at her and turned my attention back to the road. She was staring out of the window. As I awaited an answer, she turned to look at me but never opened her mouth to say anything. Instead, she unbuckled her seatbelt and awaited my next move.

“You’re not going to answer me?”

“Do I need to?” Her eyes widened a bit and she chuckled as she opened the door and hopped out of the truck. A huffed slipped past my lips as I accepted her avoidance to allow me into her head and I took the keys out of the ignition, opened the door, and stepped out. As I walked around the front of it, I used the keypad to lock the doors and Autumn playfully brushed her shoulder against my arm to garner my attention.

“It’s right here.”

“Excuse me?” I pushed the keys down into my pocket and watched as she gained a bit of a lead.

“What currently makes me happy. It’s right here.”

My smirked was nearly identical to her own and she playfully shook her head as I reached for the handle of the door and we stepped inside one after the other. The hostess seated us at a back corner booth at Autumn’s request and we settled on lemonade instead of indulging in the assortments of alcohol the bar was stocked with. She’d had enough last night and as our designated driver, I couldn’t do it.

“You know what you want?”

“Yeah. I’m getting the Spinaci pizza. It sounds so good; garlic spinach, ricotta cheese, mushrooms, peppers, and caramelized onions. You should get the Brasato pizza. Then we’ll share.” She pointed at what she was referencing to on my menu and I chuckled at her suggestion while reading over it’s ingredients.

“That actually does sound good. I’ll get it, even though it’s you who really wants it.”

“I do not. I just want to taste it.” Her eyes impishly rolled to the back of her head as I side eyed her and she nudged me in the midst of our laughter. “I’m sharing mine with you, so we’re even.”

“Yeah, okay Peaches. It’s okay to be greedy. I won’t tell anyone.”

“Whatever.” She nudged me again and her cinnamon and berry scent intoxicated me far more than any glass of wine could. When the waitress returned to the table with the drinks and took our order, silence invaded our space as she took a sip of her lemonade and scanned her eyes over our surroundings. I didn’t know whether to just come out with it or wait until her stomach was full to do so. Yet again I was left to figure out timing and this time there was no one to give me advice or a push to just go for it. It’s either now or I continue to sit around contemplating, hoping, and wishing, but never seeing results.

“Autumn.”

“Hm?” She didn’t look at me. She continued to stare at the painting to the left of herself.

“Why’d you kiss me last night?” We were close enough for me to feel her body tense up and shrink down in embarrassment. That wasn’t my intention and the sigh that came out of her mouth nearly made me cringe.

“I asked the question because I want to know if it meant to you what it meant to me.”

“I kissed you because I’d been wanting to do so for quite some time and I suppose my liquid courage knocked all of the fear out of me for just that moment and I went for it. I know it could have been in better taste but I wasn’t necessarily thinking about all of that.” She finally twisted her body so that her eyes and complete attention would be focused on me and I leaned on the table while nodding at what she explained.

“The taste was fine.” My tongue ran across my bottom lip as my nerves continued to rattle me. “You know, since the first time we’ve met I really couldn’t get you off of my mind. I thought of you after I braced you from falling, but it was non-stop after I’d seen you for a second time and truly took in all of you without you saying much of anything to me. I was baffled by your beauty but most of all, I was intrigued by your aura. Fredrick recognized you. He’d given me a bit of information that I could have found out if I Google’d you and your ties to your ex-husband but that wasn’t enough for me. It didn’t even touch the surface of what I wanted to know and still need to know. I want to say it was a mere coincidence that Isaac asked you to be my temporary flight attendant but that’d be cliche. I have faith so there had to be something more to that. That doesn’t just happen. From day one, you’ve been nothing but honest with me and you opened up and allowed me into your mind.”

“And you did the same.”

“Because you made me comfortable enough to do so. I don’t talk to many people nor do I care to share much about myself beyond who I am as a professional. Your honesty unknowingly to you was a push for me to be honest with myself and you’ve opened up the floodgates for a lot of demons that I’ve been avoiding to acknowledge. You’re making me look into myself and look for means to repair so much of the damage so that I can have that joy and happiness that you’re currently seeking.” Her infectious smile brightened up the room as it does anywhere we are and she rubbed my back in appreciation and encouragement for what I’d just revealed.

“You deserve joy and happiness. You’re too good of a man to allow those demons to get the best of you and control your destiny. It’s not worth it. You have too much life to live and too much good to come to let the past withhold you from enjoying it.”

“As do you. The thing is, right here and right now, I feel that. When I told you that I don’t think I give you enough credit last night, its because I hadn’t said any of this to you. It’s been hard to withhold this because I didn’t know when would be the right time to let you know. I didn’t want to overstep any boundaries initially and eventually it came to me not wanting to overwhelm you since I already had knowledge about what you’ve gone through. I’ve bit my tongue and even silenced myself before I went too far with my words a couple of times but that kiss gave me further ammunition to put my feelings out there. It’s beyond me liking you. I’ve liked you since we met. I want you.”

“Dante…”

“Let me finish. I don’t want you to feel pressured about any of this nor am I asking you to make a decision about me right now; not if you don’t want to. I just know that I want you and I’ve thought about what that entails and I can’t help but to want you with the appropriate title and position in your life. Maybe you just want to date me to feel me out a bit or maybe you don’t want to commit to anyone right now, which is understandable and I’d respect that but I’d like a chance. We can take it slowly in the midst of that. It’s not about me proving that I’m better than anyone or that I’m the perfect guy for you. I’d just like a chance to be along side you as your man while we live our best lives. That’s if…if you’ll have me.”

My heart thrashed against my chest after having sped up in pace word after word. Everything flew out of my mouth as quickly as it came to mind and none of it was what I rehearsed mentally throughout the course of the day. My emotions did the talking and allowed me to get it all out there to not only prove myself but to also alleviate the pressure I’d been experiencing for months. I’ve never done or said anything like that before and to live on this edge is exhilarating and frightening beyond what I could have ever imagined. No matter what she chooses, there’s no going back now and I’d never choose to do so. I’m all in. The question is, is she?

Her mouth fell agape as her nails lightly pressed into my back. The emotion in her eyes triggered the all too familiar fluttering in the pit of my stomach as I awaited what could make or break this moment.

“I’ll have you.”

I searched her eyes for any sign of hesitation but only found admiration for me. She’d chosen to soothe me by rubbing her hand against the nape of my neck just as she’d done last night but I needed more. As my arms locked around her petite frame, she leaned her head back to allow mind to align with the front of it and my lips meshed into hers in a burning hunger. It’d been such a challenge to refrain from relieving that agonizing desire for quite some time now and early this morning only served as a tortuous teaser. I had the urge to kiss her as soon as I opened my eyes and turned over to look at her. I fought it while readying myself to leave and also forced myself to refrain from awakening her for one as we were preparing to walk out of the door. In between my thoughts of this moment and how I’d go about it, her lips were embedded into my every thought and I could only fantasize about the moment when I’d be able to feel them against mine once again. The difference between the kiss we shared hours ago and now is the seal of our commitment to one another and the security in knowing that this is my reality now and I can share this kind of intimacy with her whenever I want.

“This is okay? You don’t mind public displays of affection?” Our lips met again after she’d gotten her question out and I quickly shook my head in the midst of the peck.

“No.” Her hand locked around the nape of my neck with subtle aggression and the moment only intensified when the both of her lips wrapped around my bottom one. I couldn’t help but to grab her thigh and draw her closer to my frame as she marked her territory by running her tongue across it and sucking it into her mouth. Yet again, the world seem to center around us and nothing else mattered; barely even the waitress who placed the two pizzas down on the table for us to consume.

“I’m so speechless right now. I can’t believe you said any of that.” The flustered smile on her face turned into a bit of a blush and my fingers lightly ran across her cheek in yet another gesture of my admiration for her beauty and essence.

“Why?”

“Because I didn’t think I was your type. I nearly wanted to kick myself in Paris when I finally began to admit to myself that I had feelings for you. Even this morning, I woke up and I was literally panicking because I thought that I’d truly crossed the line; so much to the point that I called my brother and quit.” My eyes widened as she revealed the last bit of information and she chuckled while nodding her head to confirm it as the truth.

“I called him back and fixed that long before you came to my room, but the first thing I could think of was to call him and create a barrier between myself and the potential embarrassment that would have happened if I wasn’t what you wanted.”

“You forgot that I was just as much into that kiss as you were?”

“This morning? Absolutely. All I kept thinking was that my drunken self pounced on you.”

“Well, you did…but I like it.” Our laughter rang out in the small corner that we were sitting in and she nudged me with her shoulder while shaking her head.

“Our first kiss could have been better though, don’t you think?”

“Nah, I liked that one.” Her shoulders dropped as she huffed and a smirk formed on her face as she reached to grab a piece of my pizza. The warmth of her body meshed with my own as she leaned into me and I leaned in to give it a try just as she had.

“I’ve been trying to show you that you’re my type ever since we met. Though I wasn’t verbal with it, in all the time that we’ve been spending together, there has been nothing more that I’ve been looking forward to other than that. I had my fears too baby. I thought I was out of your league initially. I didn’t think I’d be interesting enough for you.”

“I don’t know how. I was intrigued by you from the beginning.”

“I guess we were both so caught up in our fears, insecurities, and hesitance that we didn’t take the time out to actually pay attention to the signs that we were giving one another nor did we act on them…until now. The kiss aside, I’d been thinking of ways to ask you out on a date and I planned to do so after you returned to the east coast from Heather’s wedding festivities. I couldn’t wait much longer than that. Also, I didn’t want some guy out here to swoop in and ruin my chances because then I would have had to fight.”

“Oh, please!” She could barely chew on the bite she’d taken as she snickered. Immediately after she swallowed it down, her lips pecked mine.

“Can I be honest with you about something?”

“Anything.”

“When my ex and I got involved with one another we kept it to ourselves for the most part. Heather sort of knew about us but I was very limited with the information I gave her because it was a risky situation and I think me being young and so caught up into it, I enjoyed the thrill and adrenaline rush of being with him though it had the potential to be problematic. My family didn’t find out about Andreas and I until everything leaked out into the media and it was an ugly situation. There was a lot of fighting involved between my family and I and his mother had such a distaste for me. I chose a side and it was Andreas’. Once he took the Miami Heat coaching contract, I decided to leave UCLA and go to Miami with him because we agreed that we were going to get married. The only person who met him was Shane and it stayed that way. Even when I decided to take a breather two years ago, he never showed up to be with me during the mourning of my brother’s death or when I had the stroke. He was wrapped up in the NBA season and didn’t want to take a leave of absence. By the time he decided that he was going to come, I told him not to and the next thing you know, divorce papers were being served to me on a gloomy Friday morning.” She took a sip of her lemonade while allowing me to take in all that she’d said and I did my best to quickly understand what she was getting at.

“So no one other than Shane met him?”

“Right and that left a bad taste in all of their mouths. I skipped Isaac’s wedding because they didn’t want him there. They warned me not to bring him and I opted out of being apart of it and attending for the sake of my husband. That started a lot of tension between my brother and I and that tension is still very much between us currently. I fear what his reaction to us will be because you’re his client and he respects you for all that you are as a man but most of all as a professional. I’m nothing but the little sister who he believes is irresponsible, erratic, and childish. He’s disappointed in me because I left school and married young but overall, I think he truly resents me for choosing Andreas over him and he’s yet to let up on it. Now I’m with you. It’s tough.”

“Did you apologize to him for it? I’m not saying that you have to regret the decision you made but sometimes an apology works.”

“I do regret not going, honestly. I believe that could have been a moment for my family and I to make amends for all of the drama but instead, I reacted in a spiteful manner because I believed they were doing the same thing to me. I should have been there to support him but I refused. Hell, that was the first time I told Shane no. Now, I’ve yet to apologize to Isaac because we fight and his insults only make me want to insult him without a filter. He’s verbally vicious when he wants to be and he’s a pompous asshole the majority of the time. We clash a lot so I avoid him for the most part. So when it comes to you and I, that’s why I avoid displaying our personal connection in front of him. I can only imagine his reaction to it and if that man makes some type of assumption that I’m screwing you for what you have or that I’m involving myself with you in order to be spiteful towards him, my reaction’s not going to be one of my better moments.” Though the background situations differ, I can absolutely understand her strained relationship with her brother because I have one with my own and we’ve had the riff between the two of us ever since we were kids. In him being my older brother, I did crave for him to take me under his wing and be an influential figure in my life when I was past the toddler years but the more Matthew figured out where I came from, what happened between our father and his mother, and why his family dynamic changed, the more he pushed me away and lashed out in manners that I’d yet to understand. Richard eventually pitted he and I against one another and of course he favored Matthew because he owed it to him to do so; as did my mother. Despite all of that, I don’t think I truly took a disliking to my brother until they shipped me off to London for boarding school. It was at that point that I felt like an orphan. I still feel like one.

“You want me to talk to him?”

“No, of course not.”

“Autumn, I don’t want to hide. I want this to be as real and as normal as possible. I don’t want to creep around with you because we have no reason to do so. There’s nothing dishonorable happening here. We’re two people who took an interest in one another and developed a bond that has now turned into a relationship. What I do for a living and what you currently do for a living has nothing to do with that. You don’t ask me for anything but that doesn’t mean that I’m not going look out for you and look after you.”

“You don’t have to do all of that.”

“But I will because it’s what I want to do. I don’t want to have to hide that either. I want to meet your family because that’s where you currently reside and if I should want to come to pick you up, I’d hate for them to be surprised or confused. I don’t think you want that either. Why take them through that all over again? If you discuss it with your family, I believe that all will go well because it’ll be a much better approach than the one you took before and they’ll take it seriously. If you want me there for it, I’m in. You’ll meet my family too.” As she pulled her lip in between her teeth, she nervously nodded. “I don’t want to hide baby.”

“You want me to meet your family?”

“If I could avoid and hide you from the dysfunction that is my shitty family forever, I would. I can’t though. Richard has eyes and ears all over the place. So yes, in some type of manner, I’d like you to meet my family.”

“They can’t be that bad.” If she only knew what she was talking about. I’d like to believe that too but they’re fucking horrible as far as I’m concerned. No one deserves a set of parents like mine. They may have made sure I had luxuries and an expensive education but I would have easily traded that in for their love and moral support throughout my childhood. I wanted a soccer mom and one of those overbearing fathers who coached from the sidelines during their kid’s games. Though I had damn near perfect grades, I still wanted someone scolding the hell out of me and threatening to take away my favorite toys and game systems if my report card didn’t come in looking good. I wanted my mother to teach me how to treat a woman while my father schooled me on safe sex. I want to be assured that I was loved and cherished enough to turn to them for anything but I wasn’t. Aside from my uncle being there for me when he could, I raised myself.

Autumn picked up and bit into another piece of the pizza that I was barely eating and lightly moaned in satisfaction. She hadn’t even touched hers.

“So my pizza is better than yours greedy?” She nearly choked on the piece she was chewing as she cackled against my shoulder. Though I hadn’t touched much, I could admit the braised short rib, calabrian peppers, red onions, and chinchurri were quite a taste.

“It’s so good and you’re not even eating it.”

“What are going to do with yours? You’ve yet to touch it.”

“Midnight snack, of course. I’ll save you some of yours.” I could actually picture her sneaking a piece of pizza and laying around on the couch watching some show of hers. She receives more pleasure from dough, marinara sauce, and cheese than I’ve ever seen anyone else have.

“Nah, don’t worry about it. Enjoy it. You taste my pizza, I taste your lips. Deal?” Before she could take another bite, she gleamed in happiness and quickly leaned in.

“Deal.”

As her lips covered mine, she slowly ran her tongue across the slit of my own and I swiftly opened my mouth and permitted her warm tongue it’s entry. She granted me the best of both worlds within that moment.

I want this feeling forever.

A roar of laughter filled the twenty third floor of the Venetian without regard for the resting residents or the hour of the early morning. I inhaled the sweet scent of my woman’s body as my arm remained locked around her shoulders. Her right hand tightly intertwined with mine while her left held a frozen margarita she’d gotten as we randomly walked along the strip. It turned into a spontaneous outing after having an incredible time sitting front row and watching Boyz II Men literally serenade her song after song. Though she wasn’t the only woman within reach, she quickly became the target of Nathan Morris’ vocal affection and it didn’t stop at the direct singing. Even though they were supposed to be giving out roses to random women in the audience during their famous hit “I’ll Make Love To You”, both Nathan and Shawn seemed to return to Autumn multiple times which resulted in her having a damn bouquet worth of red roses to swoon over while singing along to the song as I fought the urge to stick a leg out and trip the both of them while they made their way back to the stage.

It was the dress. Actually, no, it was the entire package with the dress simply being the subtle enhancer. She looked like some mythical goddess of the sea as she confidently stood along side me all night long in an apricot colored mid-thigh length dress that was interestingly and intricately crafted like a coral reef all over. It’s deep v-neck opening and backless additions furthered the appeal and what damn near blew my mind were the matching platform sandals that covered her feet. I’d never seen anything like it on anyone before and she informed me that the Alexander McQueen pieces were just more old garb that had been collecting dust in her Miami closet for a couple of years. She was supposed to wear it to Adrienne Bosh’s birthday party but ultimately opted out of attending. Thankfully she didn’t, because it would have been a sight that I would have never gotten to see and my God, it’s one that no one should ever have to miss. It’s was what had the members of the nineties R&B group damn near drooling and also what caused her to be showered with dozens of compliments as we walked along the strip joking about the most trivial topics. Lastly, aside from my emotions being on an never ending and elated high, her choice in attire for our night out together played it’s part in my unabashed antics in being all over her. What I’d grimace and turn the other way over whenever I’d see couples out in public doing it, felt so natural and fulfilling to me tonight. Stacey would always tell me that when it’s real, you’ll know and I would quickly dismiss she and all of her soap opera dramatics, but I owe her now. I might not tell her how right she’s been because the gloating would be unbearable, but I’ll figure out a way to give her some form of credit.

“I put down my Boyz II Men roses when we got the drinks and I forgot them. I’m shitty.” After inserting her key card into the door, she waited for the green light to appear and opened it up for our entry.

“You had those old men trembling in their Depends.” As she walked towards her bedroom, once again we were joining one another in laughter. While she tossed her bag on the bed, I finished off what was left of my drink and disposed of the plastic cup. Autumn bought the drinks with earnings from her random luck at a penny slot machine she decided to play with while I took a phone call from Richard. She spent less than five dollars and walked out of that casino with five hundred dollars in her purse. Her win was far more hilarious than exciting to the both of us. She wasn’t even eager to win and it was clear that she didn’t know what she was doing since she’s never gambled before. Her curiosity got the best of her for the few minutes my attention wasn’t completely hers and the cards or should I say slots aligned for her.

“The show was so good though. Thank you for taking me. I love me some Boyz II Men.”

“You’re welcome Peaches. I figured you’d like it since you’re an old soul and all.” Her platform sandals were next on her agenda. While sitting on the edge of the bed, she unbuckled them one by one and carefully removed them from her feet.

“You say that like Boyz II Men aren’t during your time. You’re hitting thirty in a month old man. Speaking of, what do you want for your birthday?”

“Nothing.” As she stood up, her eyes playfully rolled to the back of her head.

“I figured you’d be difficult. I’ve been trying to think of a good gift for a few weeks now and I have ideas but I’m not sure which route I’m going to take. Give me a hint of something you’d like.”

“I like you.”When she huffed, her eyes repeated the gesture once more and a smirked danced along her perfect lips. As I stood in the door way, she inched closer until we were face to face and used her pointer finger to poke my chest.

“You have me and I’m not all that. Be serious.”

“You are all that and I’m being serious.” My chuckle forced her to cut her eyes. “But uh…maybe you, food made by you, in some place chosen by you? That sounds nice.”

“Me?” My eyes widened as an expression of curiosity arose on her face and I quickly threw my hands up in an honest defense.

“Not like that. Not like that. I mean you as in your presence, not you as in something else. You as in you.” The nervousness that arose within the pit of my stomach and eventually made it’s way to my face was an amusing sight for her to witness and she didn’t hold back from giggling while slightly holding her head to the side.

“I’ll take that into consideration. You staying down here tonight?”

“I can?” I hadn’t expected that invitation. Did I want it? Sure.

“Yes. I have an extra bedroom. Make yourself comfortable. We have a flight to take in a couple of hours.” I took a step back and my mouth fell agape as, I too, joined her in amusement.

“I can’t sleep in here with you?”

“Nope. You said that we’re taking things slowly. Remember?”

“I did say that but I didn’t mean this slow. We slept in the same bed upstairs.”

“I didn’t know there were guidelines. You said slow.” The teasing within her tone and the sultriness of her stance were on the verge of driving me up a wall and yet I could do nothing but stand there and allow her to have that power because I liked it.

“Platonic sleeping is slow.”

“Platonic sleeping? Ha! That’s a new one. Sweet dreams.” The kiss she planted on my lips worsened the fire already burning within me while the sight and sound of her bedroom door closing served as the extinguisher to put me out.

“Goodnight! You got that teasing shit from that show at Crazy Horse. I’m never taking you there again.” Like she’d been doing since we left out for our night out on the town, she cackled loudly enough for me to hear and I could still hear it as I made my way across her suite to the second bedroom.

I’m alright with slow.

I’m alright with whatever she needs from me.

But damn Autumn.

According to the pitch blackness surrounding the bedroom and the eerie silence that was cause for my eyes panning back and forth, I hadn’t been sleeping long. I removed my clothes a half an hour after lounging on the bed and answering e-mails that I’d received from A&M. Richard already informed me about the mandatory meeting happening within a day and the company luncheon that is to follow directly after but it didn’t stop the five reminder e-mails from coming my way. We’re hosting intern seminars and I’m scheduled to speak at three out of five of them. Matthew’s doing two. The only reason he summoned he and I to speak and then to observe is because our latest batch of interns is compiled of far more women than men. His knack for enticing interns is unmatched. After a week in the New York office, I’m off to the London office for a couple of days and then it’s back to New York for the MoMA Party in the Garden. This year’s event is being underwritten by Cartier. In the midst of trying to mentally access and properly pan out what had been added to my schedule, I nodded off to sleep.

Three hours. I only slept for two hours and it seems like I’m not the only one to have done so. I could hear Autumn’s footsteps pacing the floors as I laid in silence for the past couple of minutes. I mentally followed along with her every move until she surprisingly opened up the door to where I was resting. I could see her poking her head inside but it was clear that she didn’t know I was awake and it made me smile. Her next move was to step inside and quietly close the door behind herself. Her tip toeing nearly made me burst into laughter and flutters filled my core as she climbed into the bed on the left side.

“Slow huh?” She flinched at the sound of my choice and my laughter followed as she dipped down until her head hit the pillows.

“Why are you awake?”

“I just woke up. Why are you awake?”

“I never went to sleep. Couldn’t sleep.” As she slightly turned, I reached for her arm and pulled her to the middle of the bed and slid over until I was there with her. I left it up to her to pick a position and she chose to throw a leg over mine and mesh into my side until her head was resting between my neck and shoulder. We shared a peck once I turned my head and my arm rested over her back.

“Sweet dreams.” While my hand caressed her back, I listened to the sound of her breathing until it slowed to signify her slumber.

I didn’t have the urge to sleep.

No dream could be better than my current reality.

There’s no way possible.

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