#I did so many tags wtf is wrong with me

[moonlightcycle571]

Lmao Flash (which I’m assuming is Barry) and GL (which I’m assuming is Hal Jordan) are going to be deeply invested in this to the point they start to unknowingly raise Billy.

At some point the various school administrations think the two are gay dads trying to raise their wayward son.

If Billy ever calls them ‘dad’ they will think it’s sarcastic or an inside joke.

When Billy gets revealed, you bet the two will be in too deep, this officially adopting them. (Whether this is platonic or romantic HalBarry is up for interpretation).

School

Billy hasn’t gone to school in years. naturally, he’s curious about others experiences with it.

Marvel: “You’ve gone to school?”

Flash: “Yes? You sound surprised about that?”

Marvel: “What’s it like at school?”

Flash: “It’s boring. Really boring.”

Marvel: *sounds disappointed* “Oh.”

GL: “Cap, have you never gone to school before?”

Marvel: “Nope!”

Flash: “Not even in Ancient Greece? You were born around that time, right?”

Marvel: “What? No??”

GL and Flash: *share a look*

GL: “Cap, how old are you?”

Marvel: “Chronologically?”

Flash: “Yes?”

Marvel: “It’s between 92 and a hundred thousand.”

GL: “That uh… doesn’t really give us much to work with, man.”

Marvel: “Let’s just go with 92.”

Flash: “So you’re saying that during your 92 years of living, possibly more, you’ve never even stepped foot into a school?”

Marvel: “Well, I went all the way up until I was eight.”

GL: “That doesn’t really make it better.”

Flash: “Maybe we can work something out with Black Canary?”

Marvel: “What?”

Flash: “Well, she manages the kids on the team. She tells them to go to school and stuff so who’s to say she couldn’t find a way to make you go to school too? She’s resourceful like that.”

That’s how Billy ended up going to school as Marvel while shapeshifted into Billy.

Flash and GL: *dropping Billy off at a school in their civies*

GL: “You’re such a cute kid, man!” *pinches his cheek*

Marvel: “Dude, stop!” *slaps his hand away*

GL: “Alright alright, fine.”

Flash: “Have a good day at school!”

Later…

Flash, GL, Marvel: *all walking to a zeta tube while munching on hotdogs*

Flash: “So, Cap- er Mark, how was school?”

Marvel: *takes a bite so he can chew in silence for a bit* “I got expelled.”

Flash and GL: “WHAT?!”

[svtskneecaps]

honestly foolish's character walking the slightly meta line of "oo this'll be fun content" makes him feel like that marvel immortal character who is only immortal as long as he doesn't get bored (and was played by jeff goldblum in the movies). like idk why but the more i see of foolish's rp the more solidified the comparison gets in my mind.

like it's kinda cool for a headcanon ngl and also it means i'm not really surprised pikachu-ing when, say, he flips a coin to decide whether to rat out his son-in-law, or climbs into an incubator of corruption crystals, or doesn't ENTIRELY kick owen out of the kingdom. it's not that he doesn't CARE, but..... well, wouldn't it be interesting? don't you want to know what would happen?

[postergadorart]

i said i love zelink

[dollishmehrayan]

# “WOULD YOU DO ANYTHING FOR ME?, BUY A BIG DIAMOND RING FOR ME?” ── .✦ ( how batboys act when they’re engaged w reader )

dollish note ౨ৎ: I lowkey crashed out over losing Americans on tiktok but this woke up to post on tumblr but hey, also can we talk about how trump used that as a pr stunt && thought we wouldn’t notice wtf like omgg the way many americans caught on, alsoo please leave some motivation for me because I just kinda lost motivation for this app after the tiktok thingy went down 🫠 tags: (batboys x engaged!reader)

© dollishmehrayan — ( all rights reserved to me. These works cannot be reposted, translated, or modified. Thank you for understanding dollies! )

DICK GRAYSON ── .✦

Over the moon and not afraid to show it. Dick tells everyone the second you say yes. Alfred? He knows. Random stranger in the grocery store? The metro security guy?, Yep, they know too. He’s got that goofy, lovestruck grin plastered on his face 24/7.

Wedding planning enthusiast. You thought you’d do most of the planning? Wrong. Dick’s fully invested, showing you Pinterest boards of venues, color schemes, and “Do you think Nightwing blue (dollish note: I think ‘#3366CC’ perhaps?) would be tacky for the napkins?”

Gets sappy at random times. You’ll catch him staring at you with a dreamy look, and when you ask why, he just shrugs. “I’m just thinking about how lucky I am.”, “Dick calm down you only proposed like 2 weeks ago.”

Brags to the Batfam constantly. “Guys, I’m going to be a husband! Can you believe it? Me! Richard Grayson!” Bruce pretends to be joyful a bit but he’s done hearing it for the 777x time but even he cracks a small smile when Dick won’t shut up about you.

Practices saying his vows in the mirror. You walked in on him once, and he was mortified. “Okay, but you didn’t hear the good part yet!”, “You literally finished the whole paper !!”

JASON TODD ── .✦

Acts like it’s not a big deal, but it’s huge for him. He’ll play it cool at first, saying something like, “It’s just a ring, babe.” But deep down, he’s nervous, excited, and trying not to let it show.

Keeps the engagement low-key. Jason’s not one for flashy announcements or grand gestures. He wants this to be something special between you two, not the whole world.

Protective x10. Now that you’re officially going to be his spouse, Jason is extra watchful. He’s already looking into ways to keep you safe and makes sure you’re never caught in the crossfire of his vigilante life.

Wants you to be 100% comfortable. He checks in with you constantly about the wedding plans. “We don’t have to do anything big, okay? Just say the word, and it’s done.” He’ll let you take the lead but secretly loves when you include him.

Teases you with the whole “fiancé” thing. “Hey, fiancée. Can you grab my coffee? Oh, did I mention you’re my fiancée now?” It’s his way of hiding how excited he really is.

TIM DRAKE ── .✦

Nervous wreck but totally in love. Tim overthinks everything after proposing. Did he pick the right ring? Did he say the right words? Is he even ready to be a husband? But every time he sees you smile, it calms him down.

Keeps it practical. Tim doesn’t want a huge engagement party or a grand wedding. He’s more focused on what your future together will look like your shared goals, finances, and making sure you’re both on the same page.

Researches marriage like it’s a mission. He has books on successful relationships, listens to podcasts, and even makes a checklist for wedding planning. You find it adorable when he starts using color coded spreadsheets.

Loves when you call him your fiancé. The first time you said it, he blushed so hard he had to look away. Now he’s low-key obsessed with hearing it. “You don’t have to keep calling me that… but don’t stop either.”

Gets emotional when he thinks about the future. You once caught him staring at the engagement ring on your finger, looking teary-eyed. When you asked what was wrong, he said, “I just can’t believe you’re actually mine.” (I would’ve smacked the shit out of him for that, I don’t do romance 🙄💪)

[afterglowsainz]

so high school | lando norris

summary: no one imagined that the rising popstar of the moment and the papaya f1 driver would be dating until an album release and a very much awaited maiden win takes everyone by surprise

fc: maia reficco

request: here

a/n: whenever you guys request something based on a taylor song a fairy is born <3

—

liked by landonorris, alexandrasaintmleux and others

yourusername the tortured poets department is out tonight 📝🖤🧸

view all comments

username new music from my queen finally !!!

username i’ve only had two weeks to prepare for this since she announced it i’m not okay

gracieabrams 🖤🖤🖤

yourusername 🤍🤍🤍

username i already know it’s gonna be album of the year

username mother blessing us with new music

username is this gonna make me cry or not? i need to be prepared

sabrinacarpenter iconic of you (liked by yourusername)

username breakup album or i’m in love album?

liked by oliviarodrigo, landonorris and others

yourusername i love you, it’s ruining my life

tagged postmalone

view all comments

username WTF MV ALREADY??

username IT’S HAPPENING

username omg this fucking song 😭 yn you’re going to JAIL

username that’s how you open a motherfucking album

taylorswift actually sick!

yourusername learned from the best!

username i love you🫵🏽 it’s ruining my life (these fucking songs man😩)

landonorris 🖤

username HUH?

username and what is he doing here 🤣

TAKE A TOUR OF THE MCLAREN TEAM HUB WITH LANDO NORRIS & OSCAR PIASTRI posted by mclaren on youtube

comments

username LANDO LISTENS TO Y/N??

username not only that but repeatedly according to oscar???

username guys is it wrong for me to ship lando and y/n🤭

username we’re living of crumbs istg

username oh i know my man listens to the alchemy to hype him up

liked by lissiemackintosh, yourusername and others

landonorris pre-miami🧸

view all comments

username hello there

username don’t look at the camera challenge

username prayer chain for lando to win in miami 🙇🏽‍♀️

username stay delusional

username so when’s our wedding?

username these likes between lando and yn are a bit flirty or is it just me?

username they’re just likes on a social media app 😭

username AND a comment he did on her post

username AND him listening to her music before races

username you sound a bit insane but i’m digging this theory

liked by landonorris, maxverstappen1 and others

yourusername my honest reaction to the ttpd reception 🤍 what’s your favorite currently?

view all comments

username GIRL YOU’RE SO PRETTY

username down bad, mbobhft, loml, all of them

username THE BLACK DOG !!!

maxverstappen1 down bad (liked by yourusername)

username hello?

username the flowersss 👀

username literally every song on the album i physically can’t listen to anything else

oliviarodrigo fresh out the slammer is crazy (liked by yourusername)

username guilty as sin? was … an experience

username girlie just casually dropping album of the year and asking us to choose a favorite?

landonorris the alchemy and so high school (liked by yourusername)

username HELLO?

username no one talking about f1 drivers randomly commenting their favorite songs 😭

liked by lewishamilton, lissiemackintosh and others

f1 not much here, just your favorite celebs attending the miami grand prix

tagged kendalljenner, davidbeckham and yourusername

view all comments

username my girl yn!!!

username yn at the paddock was not what i expected to see at all

username missed the opportunity to caption this “i'm an aston martin that you steered straight into the ditch”

username lowkey i need to see a yn lando meet up

username kings of flirting through ig likes!

username promote that album queen

liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri and others

landonorris FUCKING P1 🖤🧡

view all comments

username WTF THEY WERE A COUPLE THIS WHOLE TIME?

username so proud!! very well deserved

username well this all makes so much more sense now😭

mclaren first of many🧡

username when they recreated ‘the alchemy’🤭

username pls it was so cute to see him run straight to her as soon as he got out of the car😩

landonorris that song was written about me actually

username bro hard launching on a race post

username well he lowkey hard launch on international television after kissing her in front of everyone!

yourusername so proud of you!🧡

landonorris 🖤

[landososcar]

lover ; LN4

pairing(s) ; lando norris x swiftie!reader

summary ; in which y/n just wants to post pictures of her boyfriend, not expecting people to get the wrong idea

warnings ; smau, lots of fluff

note ; its 3am and i didn’t want to sleep til i finished this so idk what mistakes there probably is lmao😭 also just pretend the twitter stuff says 2024 i cba changing it all

instagram ; yourusername

liked by nando4lorris, carlossainz55 and others

yourusername i saw the dimples first and then i heard the accent 💓☺️

view all comments

user1 who are you

carlossainz55 you tagged the wrong account silly

yourusername you replied with the wrong account moron

nando4lorris you two aren’t slick

yourusename yeah ok mr nando lorris

nando4lorris you’re supposed to be on my side wtf

user2 i’m so lost 😭😭

user3 i’m confused someone explain

user4 babe everyone’s confused

user5 wait so is this carlos’ gf or not

user6 idk who you are but you’re hot as fuck

user7 ok i swear i’ve seen carlos wear that top in the 4th pic before

user8 yeah i think i’ve seen lando wearing it too tho

user9 but lando isn’t in this girls likes and comments

nando4lorris yeah guys you’re right she’s gotta be carlos’ girlfriend

yourusername nando4lorris fuck off i hate you so much 😭😭😭😭😭

user10 ????????

instagram ; yourusername

liked by landonorris, nando4lorris and others

yourusername i’d like to hang out with you for my whole life 🤗🧡

view all comments

user1 crying because lando liked on his main AND his burner (confirmed)

yourusername p.s. the tag in these pics is for PHOTO CREDS 😁

user2 LMFAOOO HER COMMENT

user3 girl said my mans is NOT carlos sainz jr🙅‍♀️

user4 i have so much to say

user5 the taylor love lyrics, the orange heart emoji, the flowers, the ladybugs, THE CAT CARDIGAN

user6 i think i would die for her

nando4lorris 🧡🧡

yourusername 🥰

carlossainz55 i thought you guys were still trying to be sneaky

yourusername carlos you’re the one making it hard to be sneaky

user7 oh it’s so lando

carlossainz55 oh well it’s been 4 years everyone already knew

user8 ITS BEEN WHAT JEHFKSKKS ????????

instagram ; landonorris

liked by oscarpiastri, maxverstappen1 and others

landonorris i’ve loved you (five) summers now honey but i want them all 😁😁

view all comments

user1 oh my god

user2 FIVEEEEE SUMMERS????? EVEN MORE THAN CARLOS SAID !/?;&2!@:9(

carlossainz55 i’m sorry i just guessed how many years because i didn’t know exactly just that its been a long long time

yourusername it’s ok carlos you were close

user3 SHES BEEN TO RACES AND NO ONES EVER SAID ANYTHING ABOUT HER OH MY GOD

maxverstappen1 finally mate

oscarpiastri wooo secrets out 🥳

user4 he used a taylor lyric for the caption im gonna be sick

user5 if you zoom in on the second pic you can actually see me drowning myself in the background

ciscanorris1 💓💓

yourusername love you🥰

user6 wait i don’t have twitter can someone explain

user7 oh BABE you’ve got some catching up to do

yourusername my fav boy love you to saturn ☺️🧡

landonorris i love you more than you love taylor swift🥰

yourusername ok settle down babe don’t go too far

landonorris no sorry you’re right

user8 when he understands that ones love for taylor is never beaten >>>>>

user9 i need them biblically

user10 i still don’t understand how they hid her for 5 years lmfaoooo

user11 yourusername ok y/n but did he take you to the eras tour

yourusername he got us tickets for a uk show later this year 🥰🥰

user12 now, how’d that curly haired vroom vroom bitch pull HER

liked by landonorris!

my other works !

[chuulyssa]

​​🇸​​ 🇵 ​​🇦 ​​🇳 ​​🇰​​ !

BSD MEN REACTING TO YOU SPANKING THEM.

↷ A/N ─ as usual please leave likes and reblogs to show support :D i love spoiling you guys !! now please tell me to go study i need some motivation :(

★ FT. ─ dazai , chuuya , ranpo , akutagawa , fyodor

!! TAGS ─ spanking, mentions of smut

MATURE THEMES, 16+, MENTIONS OF AND IMPLIED SMUT

*spanks*

ᴅᴀᴢᴀɪ.

momentarily surprised but quickly recovers

smiles and turns to you

it's like you just gave him a treat :D you can almost see his tail wagging as if he's a dog (he hates dogs btw grrr)

he believes that you spanking his ass gives HIM permission to do the same to YOU :( how mean of him

so he catches you off guard by spanking your ass

and you two end up chasing each other down to take turns spanking each other. whoever loses does the dishes tonight

"You've been very good today; you even completed your punishment for provoking me," he says, engulfing you in a cuddle after you returned from doing the dishes.

ᴄʜᴜᴜʏᴀ.

chokes on air this time (yes chuuya chokes in every single scenario of mine but he's the one choking you at night so its ok !! :D)

he's surprised because wtf?? he's the one supposed to be doing that conventionally????

defo spanks you back but tries to be as soft as possible because he's a gentleman

i think this is already an hc but he's an ass guy so once you've spanked him don't think he's gonna leave u at all

i did say his spanks are gonna be as soft as he can make them be but i never said how many 🤪😇

"Count," he hisses. It's midnight, and you're at his mercy. After his long and hard day at work, he needs something to relieve his stress.

ʀᴀɴᴘᴏ.

stops your hand mid-air because duh he already knew about what you were gonna do

twists and turns and ends up holding your ass and squeezing it

all the while you're like wtf is wrong with you

his eyes make it look like he's enjoying it sm :( such a kitty cat

im still mad they didn't give us a whole separate scene for his ass :< anyone who's read the manga, any pics you wanna share? 👁

"You need to buy me extra candy for putting up with your stupidity," he rolls his eyes, pinching your cheek.

ᴀᴋᴜᴛᴀɢᴀᴡᴀ.

his reflexes immediately act and you see rashomon from the back of his coat

but then he realizes its you...

and he FLUSHES. YOU'VE NEVER SEEN THIS MAN BLUSH

well now you have :D his poor virgin ass

not a virgin anymore once he started dating you u horny ass mf /lh

he has literally no idea how to reply to that

he just shrugs cluelessly

"I guess I should return the favour?" he tries to sound confident but ends up delivering the lightest, most gentle spank. He doesn't want to hurt you. He loves you.

ꜰʏᴏᴅᴏʀ.

DISGUSTED™

one, because he's another virgin (virgin slander less gaurr 💪🏻 even tho im one myself; its the self burn guys !!)

and two, for the last time STOP. MESSING. WITH. HIS. RELIGIOUS. SELF.

you're SATAN in his eyes, trying to distract him and make him sin (as if he isn't a murderer and a terrorist cough cough)

if we're being delusional enough he'll leave the room with a faint pink on his cheeks 🤡

definitely returns the favour at night 🤭🤭 (only if you're married tho!!)

"My sole undivided attention is all yours now," he hits your ass again. "Anything to say? Hm? Why not? You were all for giggling at my face today. What's wrong now?"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

© chuulyssa 2024 - do not copy, plagiarize or repost my works on any platforms. do not translate.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

[bbyjackie]

𝐒𝐎𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐒 𝐀𝐒 𝐒𝐀𝐁𝐎'𝐒 𝐆𝐅 — ♡

one piece social media + dating feat: sabo

》 asl brothers completed

♡ liked by lalalakoala, nicorobin and 5.3k others

_ynln: ur gf or ramen, pick one

tagged: saaaa_bo

saaaa_bo: the answer is obvious

↳ saaaa_bo: ramen 🙏

↳ ace: wrong.

↳ ace: the correct answer is me 🤩🤩

↳ marco_o: said absolutely no one

↳ _ynln: @saaaa_bo surely this is grounds for a break up 🫤

lalalakoala: okay we get it, you have a boyfriend

p1rateking_luffy: YOU GUYS GOT RAMEN WITHOUT ME?????!!!!??! ☹️☹️

↳ _ynln: sorry luf, i'll bring you next time!

↳ saaaa_bo: no wtf we are not bringing luffy, i'm gonna go broke and he's gonna eat our share

↳ ace: im gonna have to agree with sabo

↳ p1rateking_luffy: 🙁

↳ lovenami: nah sabo you're so real for that (liked by saaaa_bo)

↳ marco_o: @ace you are literally the LAST person who can say that

♡ liked by blackleg.sanji, nefertari_vivi and 6.9k others

_ynln: applications for a new bf linked in my bio.

[music: traitor - Olivia Rodrigo ♫]

tagged: saaaa_bo

blackleg.sanji: I APPLIED ‼️‼️‼️

blackleg.sanji: HOW MANY CAN I SEND IN?!

blackleg.sanji: WILL I BE NOTIFIED IF I MAKE IT IN THE WAITLIST?

↳ theroronoa.zoro: the only notification you're gonna get is one from the police

saaaa_bo: WOWW JUST CAUSE I CHOSE RAMEN OVER YOU 🤨🤨

↳ _ynln: girls gotta do what she's gotta do

↳ _ynln: OMG SABO YOU APPLIED? I LOVE YOU SO MUCH OMG STOP 💗💗

↳ saaaa_bo: wtv loser.

lovenami: omg you should've made them transfer you five dollars to apply

↳ _ynln: nami ur trying to pimp me out huh 😭🫵

lovenami: you're so gorg yn. (liked by saaaa_bo)

↳ _ynln: i miss u sm namiiii 💕

nefertari_vivi: OMG STOP UR SO PRETTY I LOVE UUU

↳ _ynln: 😭💕

ace: why is everyone happy EXCEPT ME (liked by saaaa_bo)

↳ marco_o: give me five minutes and i'll dm u a list of reasons (liked by _ynln, saaa_bo, p1rateking_luffy)

♡ liked by ace, lalalakoala and 11 others

priv.ynn: blocking him on this acc so he doesn't see this but omg this is so cute, koala caught him trying to buy gifts for me <333

ace: yo wtf why isn't he getting me prada 🤨

ace: ALSO WHAT DID HE BUY DAMN THAT BAG IS HUGE

↳ priv.ynn: IDK I RLLY WANT TO KNOW

lalalakoala: you guys are so cute together it makes me want to die 🥱

lovenami: DAMNN GIRLY UR SO LUCKY (liked by priv.ynn)

♡ liked by p1rateking_luffy, _ynln and 8.2k others

saaa_bo: public service announcement: my gf is the best. i love her sm. she is so beautiful, i am so lucky to be hers <3

tagged: _ynln

p1rateking_luffy: HEHE my future sister in law is so pretty (liked by ace, p1rateking_luffy)

↳ _ynln: AWWW LUFFY YOU'RE SO SWEET LOVE U 💕💕

_ynln: SABO STOP

_ynln: YOURE MAKING ME FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU ALL OVER AGAIN YOU IDIOT 🤓💖

↳ saaaa_bo: does this mean i won the boyfriend application?

↳ _ynln: there was no competition 💪

nicorobin: pretty girl

↳ saaaa_bo: i agree ☝️

↳ _ynln: YOU GUYS STOP IT IUBWVCEI

lalalakoala: think u feel lonely? spend the night third wheeling these guys and see how u feel then 💀💀

↳ _ynln: KOALA WE TRIED SETTING YOU UP W SO MANY PEOPLE YOU'RE JUST PICKY

↳ lalalakoala: 🥱🥱

♡ liked by saaaa_bo, ace and 8.5k others

_ynln: top scoring appplicant 1️⃣

tagged: saaaa_bo

saaaa_bo: pretty woman

saaaa_bo: hell yeah 💪🔥🔥

ace: yn check ur dms i sent u uggo photos of sabo as a kid

↳ _ynln: LMFAOOO???

↳ saaaa_bo: ACE YOU'RE LITERALLY PRAYING ON MY DOWNFALL

↳ saaaa_bo: ALSO I WAS NEVER AN UGLY KID

↳ ace: sorry couldn't hear that over that tooth gap of urs 🥱

↳ p1rateking_luffy: HAHAHAHA YOU'RE SO FUNNY ACE

↳ saaaa_bo: 😐

↳ _ynln: HAHAHA NOOOO SABO WAS SO CUTE ‼️

↳ ace: everyone she's being held at gunpoint (liked by _ynln)

↳ saaaa_bo: 😐😐

blackleg.sanji: NOOOOOO

blackleg.sanji: gotta respect sabo for treating you well gorgeous queen (liked by saaaa_bo)

lalalakoala: omg im literally gonna have to block u

[shuenkio]

Accidentally - ❤️‍🔥

Paring: Hyung line x male!reader

Genre: nsfw 18+ (don't like don't press)

Cw: mentioned of sex [d] toys a lot, no sex.

Summary: Your delivery sent you the wrong package.

Non proof read :') lmk if something is wrong.

Crd to all pics&dividers

Below cut !

Lhs: you were still in a deep sleep when he went to open the door for your delivery package. The moment you woke up, rubbing your eyes to start your day, Heeseung was sitting at the end side of your bed, glaring at you in disbelief. You asked him what was wrong. And he throw you a package that he received for you. You open the unwrapped package when you see a giant dildo inside, and also a transparent one. Your eyes went wide like you just have seen a ghost. Wtf a dildo!

"What. The. Hell. Is. This Hyung!" You almost stutter, having a feeling that he probably misunderstood you for ordering this thing.

"I should be the one to ask you. A dildo? Is my dick not big enough to rail you up? Tsk such a waste" he scoffed, irritated with you as he huffed the hot air unbelievable.

"Excuse me!! I did not order such a thing, why should I order this massive toy when in fact I order a fucking skincare package" You fire back, your blood rushing to your cheeks in a heat emotion. You observe the name tag on the little note and show it to him, tapping your fingertip on it aggressively.

"Put your eyes here and SEE" Heeseung takes a glance at the name tag before realizing it's not your name on it and he signed the confirmation wrong without thinking. Which left him stunned in the place, unable to speak. As the guilt started to wash all over his body, embarrassing.

"I- uhh haha just a misunderstood... My bad mn I should've looked more carefully, please — forgive me" He kneeled, begging on the floor, as he had made a really big mistake, his hands were rubbing against each other, asking for your forgiveness.

You leave your bed, with burning cheeks as you stomp your feet furiously to the bathroom. Heeseung keeps on pleading for your mercy, even if you don't give af about him.

"Please mn~ speak to me i swear I'll do anything hm? Any dare just anything whatever you say! Do you want my body? I can be naked the whole day to please you baby uhh y- you want your skincare I'll go get it real quick for y-"

Sigh, you let him go as your toothbrush still pulsing inside your mouth. Shaking your head in annoyance seeing that he would do anything just to please you, giving you a warm feeling inside, as your madness for him faded away.

Pjs: You accidentally sent the wrong location for your delivery, which will arrive by the next day. However as the next day comes, you've called your boyfriend Jay to pick up your package for you and explain how your clumsy self, sent your delivery wrong location. He brushes it off, thinking you probably ordered useless things again, so on the way to your apartment, he takes a peek what's inside before discovering two 25 inches dildos, his mind goes blank, and flabbergasted makes his not-innocent eyes even dirtier.

When he arrived, he greeted you with a tight hug as usual. But oddly, he gives you a small gift instead of your wrong package.

You furrowed your eyebrow skeptically, as you opened it to see what was inside.

"Love... Why are there so many condom boxes?" You asked boldly, straightforward question him why, as your face turned even more red when a grin started to spread across his face.

"I just checked your little box, honey, ~ you should've just told me if you want my cock so bad for pleasure, don't be such a coward for that" he leans down at your level, as his eyes darken, full of lust and desire, explained that he's eager for bedtime.

"Wdym love I don't understand -" you respond, still not ringing the bell. You want to ask him with full force from your chest why but you choose to assure him kindly.

"Haha I've seen two dildos inside your box honey, and it's longer than a human's size could reach. I can't believe you're so wild in this field" Jay chuckled softly under his breath as he mentioned what he saw, drawing you more to the edge to see it with your own eyes.

"W-what? I don't order those kinda toys though. I ordered a new book that was just published yesterday, Jay! You're sure you're not wrong?" You reply, telling the truth with your heart pounding inside your chest.

Jay tilts his head, checking your package once again carefully word by word, as his eyes lay on the name that's written with someone else name.

"W—wow um... Sorry, God, I am super sorry, I can't believe this" The truth was revealed, when he dropped the box down, and covered his flashed face with his palm, ashamed at what he just brought to you. Boxes of condoms.

You wheezing on the spot, laughing your ass out like there's no tomorrow, Humiliated him even more. You pause your snort for a sec before steadying yourself once again.

"Don't be embarrassed love, I know what's in store for us tonight with your little gift mwah"

Sjy: today was your date, it's happened that he came to pick you up so early, giving you no time to react, quickly grab your clothes and towel, rushing in to shower in the bathroom. He takes a sit on the chair inside your bedroom. As his eyes began to explore the decorations, he saw something on the bed sheet.

He didn't want to touch your pieces of stuff without your consent however, the urge to feel it getting out of hand, made him want to open it up, ripped to shreds to see what was inside. Eventually, he did but he didn't tear it into pieces. He unties the wrap on the box, as he learns that, inside the box has a horse dildo, a fucking horse dildo. His expectations went wild, he thought you would order some nice stuff, daily life items or something but a sex toy. Instead of shocked, he's amazed.

After you finished dressing up, you saw him sitting on your bed, giggling all alone, back facing you. You tap his shoulder for his attention, he turns toward you with an enduring horse dildo.

As a result, a gasp left your mouth, catching you off guard. He encounters the wrong package on your bed, where you forget to hide it.

"Jake it's not what it looks like, the delivery man sent me the wrong box you've to trust me" you reassure him nervously because you know that once he's turned on, nothing can stop his beast.

He stood on his feet, slowly closing the gap between you two, as he wrapped his hand around your waist tight.

"Idc what your reason is, you're responsible for my hard cock underneath, now bend over for your bf~"

Psh: The same goes for Heeseung. When you're busy cleaning the house upstairs, he went to pick your package up as soon as he heard there was a delivery. He signed without a glance, and didn't even bother to care about what was inside.

After the intense activity of cleaning the whole room upstairs, you take a break together with Sunghoon. At the same time, you settled for lunch times, scooping all the food, and enjoying your time after all the sweat.

Once you're finished eating, Sunghoon gives the box to you on the table while he's still eating. You let out an excited noise, overjoyed that your order had arrived faster than you thought.

Your hand started to unveil to unbox the lovely new earphones that you've always wanted, however, instead of the headphones, a fat massive inhumane dildo exposed on the table with its brown color, detailed veins and even hair pattern on the dildos.

As soon as Sunghoon caught sight of it, he choked on his food. Almost spit out all the foods he had just eaten.

"Fuck me you almost killed me with your damn dildo," He said, half surprised and half choked, gulping down a glass of water to pour the food that stuck in his throat.

"Hell nah, they sent the wrong one but— who tf ordered such a wide-length toy omg" The dildo is not only big but also massive at its length too, catching you taken aback by your discovery. Sunghoon then pressed his finger to feel it before letting out a rich laugh.

"I wouldn't be so surprised though if you order a real sex toy but you can always just use me right?"

"You talk nonsense again stop—" He cut you as he snatched your hand to feel his cock that's semi-hard inside the fabric right now. As he pressed your hand rubbing harder, begging for your touch without a word.

"Use my cock like a dildo mn~ I'm more than happy to offer myself for you, raw and even more tasty"

🗣️ please mind my English! ><

🗣️ Reblog and like is much appreciated ♥

🗣️ lack of perfect words ;-;

Ps: This is the wildest shzt I ever write 😗🤌

Anyway thanks again pookie for supporting this writer 🥰🫶.

[vxiphoid]

SERENE SHENANIGANS

❨ summary ❩ twst › waking them up to tell them stories that don’t make sense

tags ✧ fluff, crack, savanaclaw boys, defo not proofread its like 7 am, cursing but nothing out of the ordinary, ooc(?), ruggie calls you a little shit like once (affectionate), jack is whipped for you

amanuensis’ message ⊹ I LITERALLY LOVE DOING THIS??? my friends hate me for it. but anyways hiii im back after like my month hiatus, how are thy sleeplings?😋 mb guys writers block has been really kicking my ass, i was spitting blanks on paper… i’m gonna hopefully post another pastry emporium soon for scarabia so stay tuned for that‼️

⌜ 300+ e/chara ⌟

♫ sunset boulevard - hohyun

twst masterlist

LEONA KINGSCHOLAR

— “leona… pspsps….”

— he hums gruffly when his name was called the first time, only opening his eye thinking you called him a second time when it was really just noise that you would make to get the attention of a house cat. he instantly pins his ears back. how dare you. “hmm?”

— “so i took our snail for a walk and i had accidentally left my feet here to wash the dishes because the grass was blue.”

— huh? you could see him trying to process everything you just said as you explained, his lips parting and eyebrows furrowing. it took everything in you not to laugh. he does one of those blinks, the really delayed ones, one eye opens before the other…

— he’s half asleep too so the confusion is just adding up altogether. if chicken scratch wasn’t a writing term, this is literally it in words. its like the books back at home he picks up to read (derogatory) its, what, 4 am? dont do this to him😭

— you’ve never seen him so expressive💀 this definitely makes his eye and ear twitch at the same time. what type of fucked up fever dream is this?? its usually a blessing seeing you as the first thing he wakes up to, not when you wake him up with some bull strung up in a sentence with your beady eyes staring at him while he sleeps. he loves you, yes, but what does he even say to this…

— “what…”

— your forehead met with his chest as you struggled not to laugh at the uncharacteristic break in leona’s voice. how many cups of coffee did you drink? he asks you to repeat yourself even though it kinda a mind mush decision so you did and by the end of it, he looks absolutely restless.

— “that’s… yes. that’s great, herbivore. can we go to bed now?”

— you note that leona is surprisingly patient when half asleep

┏━━━━━━ ━ ─ ╴⋯ ⟢

JACK HOWL

— deep sleeper. tug his ear. though he practically springs up before your hand makes contact, giving himself whiplash.

— “jack?”

— almost instantly relaxes when he realizes its you, tail wagging subtly☹️ “hi, baby. s’something wrong?”

— “hiii, do you remember a year ahead ago when i had to go to the dentist to get my spine fixed and the cats were barking at the flying dogs because the sky was in the water?”

— bro feels like he just had a stroke💀 he’s blinking rapidly, rubbing nose bridge as you explain. he really wants to understand, he does, but wtf did you just say??? it was the innocent “hi” before you unapologetically bashed his head in with the entire dictionary. its so ridiculous he couldn’t help but laugh.

— “jack, this is serious.” even as you told him that, your voice was not steady at all which made his shoulders shake violently in silent laughter.

— “im listening, i swear. tell me one more time?” yk his ass is not listening. he pulls you into his lap while his thumbs idly rubbed your sides, responding to your stories with “uh-huh” and “yeah?” with a lovesick smile on his face.

— eventually holds your face and starts pressing heart squeezing, fluffy kisses all over your face which truly made you more tired then you were. you honestly start forgetting what and where the story was going.

— jack only pauses his kissing attack to respond when you take a small break but even then he doesn’t pull away fully, he’s just speaking against your skin

— “—and the duck had my arm while i was taking it on a walk because gran tammy was in a flying shopping cart.”

— “oh wow. and then?”

— he’s listening but he’s not, mostly because he’s like two seconds away from dreamland and his brain isn’t registering half the shit you’re saying. he wants to see how many stories you can jumble up.

— “yeah, i think it’s bedtime for us…”

┏━━━━━━ ━ ─ ╴⋯ ⟢

RUGGIE BUCCHI

— omfg he wakes up like a mom. like yk how you would barely touch them and they would gasp like they were just given cpr?? he wakes up like that.

— and you’re just standing there awkwardly 👁️👁️

— takes a quick look around before looking at you. “what happened? is it time to wake up leona already?” you shake your head and ruggie flops back, an arm draped over his eyes. “you scared me… come, lay down with me?” he held his free arm out for you and you did take your place cozied up against his side. to your surprise, you did actually scare the living shit out of him from how fast his heart was racing.

— “ruggie, yk i just found out you’re related to turtles, right? and i had to take uncle bobby to the vet to get a dna test because the fish drowned in air.”

— slow roblox turn towards you but instead its his head as he cranes it down to stare at you. you can practically hear the gears in his head turning and you literally could not look at him or you’d blow your cover.🧍🏾

— “i’m sorry,, what the fuck??”

— he’s genuinely confused, asking you questions about your story while his brain tries to put together the pieces. each question he asks, the more its harder to speak in full sentences other than wheezes

— “what are you laughing at, ya little shit? explain this to me!”

— “i’m trying!”

— and you are😭 its like when you have to explain the family tree really slow bc you cant say, “my father’s girlfriend’s son” without him like ???? and you’re trying to explain it to him slowly, eventually forgetting what you said in the first place…

— “…and the fish drowned in air.”

— “yes.”

— “sweetheart, you still haven’t explained how i’m related to turtles—”

[eternal-kosmo-ghoul]

“even i’m not into that shit”

❤︎ synopsis — the sleep token members being fucking morons and fucking around

pairing: sleep token members x gn!reader (can be platonic or romantic)

theme: crack ✦

a/n: I’M BACK !!!! hopefully i don’t disappear for like a good fifty years after this. this is my third set of stupid ass headcanons. i pulled my shitty humor out of my ass for this one, enjoy !!! (the original ask got swallowed by my dumbass because i accidentally posted the unfinished fic 💀 this is dedicated to my bestie @dead-end-fanfiction)

cw: i think the title speaks for itself

▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆

➵ vessel

i just know this man is the most unhygienic motherfucker to ever exist

more specifically with his teeth. he cannot brush his teeth to save his life

like ??? this all powerful, dark deity, has the most stinky ass breath that if anyone dares to even breath it in, they’d disintegrate on the spot

like what the fuck vessel, you’re better than this

i love vessel but he just does weird shit sometimes

he sleeps butt ass naked

and one time you accidentally walked in on him while he was literally stripping to get ready for bed

he stood there like an npc while you were freaking out

“…. what’s wrong—“ “what’s wrong is that YOU’RE BUTT ASS NAKED IN FRONT OF ME—“

vessel is easily fascinated by human things. i mean - he was once human, so he likes to keep in touch every now and then.

however, out of all of the human things he had to have an obsession with.

… it was rubber ducks

this isn’t even explainable— how do you explain this all-powerful sleep entity to be obsessed with rubber ducks

he literally has a whole room dedicated to his collection of anything rubber duck related. give him a gift that has something to do with ducks and he’s making out with you on the spot

that’s not a joke, he did that with you before

➵ ii

this motherfucker is on his last limb and he’s being held together by paper clips

ii’s not even the leader but he cannot catch a break to save his life

he’s the only one that knows how to cook

one time he left ivy and the vesselettes in the kitchen by themselves. came back to house fires and high pitched screaming that definitely was not from the ladies

ii makes bomb ass banana cream pie though

ik for a fact this man does NOT keep his room clean

you once walked into his room to ask him a favor and there were like - a million drumsticks everywhere on the floor while he sat in the center of it

how does one possess that many drumsticks???

“dude what the f— clean your room!” “it gives me inner peace, y/n. go away.”

ii’s scared of the jollibee mascot

he once went out with his buddies to get some of that fast food. that giant red and yellow fuckass bee then came out of nowhere and spooked the shit out of ii

he then socked the guy in the face so hard the dude wearing the costume had a bloody nose

ii quickly fled the scene to not get arrested

after that he’s had a fear of fast food mascots in general, it’s kinda funny.

don’t bring ii near the jack in the box mascot though, he’s got some trauma from what he’s seen on twitter

➵ iii

zesty ahh mf

plays his bass like he’s fingering someone’s asshole like 🤨 whatcha doin’ iii ??

the type of man to set like fifty million alarms but never wakes up to any of them

however he wakes up everyone else in the process

it gets annoying hearing the “by the seaside” ringtone every morning at 6am. so one day you came into his room and poured ice cold water on him to wake him up

iii didn’t wake up from that btw, you thought it was dead

“…. bro wtf wake up—“

thankfully he wasn’t

biggest kpop stan

he’s a boy group stan and his favorite group is ateez

constantly blasting guerilla too

also i feel like iii owns a tumblr blog too

he’d be out here posting some shih like “pov you’re locked in a room w him for twenty four hours and you have to tickle his balls wyd” 💀

he probably posts also moodboards or some shi and tags them like an actual tumblr blogger

#it took my ahh fifty hours to make this plz repost it

stalks his fans on twitter

gets scared by said fans on twitter

“wdym they wanna get me pregnant”

breaks his bass every four hours during practice and vessel chews his ahh out every time

but it’s funny because you’re always there to help him

➵ ivy

he likes to act like he’s tough shit but ivy is a huge nerd

literally the definition of “magical in bed” except the magic is him explaining the gaming system of magic the gathering

hot asf but has no bitches frfr

also the definition of loser trapped in a hottie’s body

i’d like to believe that ivy has a crunchy ipad kid cough

and i mean CRUNCHY. bro will start choking on his saliva and start coughing like a dying seal

it’s quite hilarious, but also concerning at the same time

the first time you heard him cough like that, you were like 😟

“AEUGH- HEUGH— BEUHSHAK-“ “ivy—“

that pretty sums up the entire interaction

this bitch looks like he ate glue as a kid

more specifically glitter glue. the pink kind.

idk that sounds like ivy

he gets literal death coffee in the morning too btw

no ice. no sugar. straight shots of espresso.

eight shots, btw.

the coffee looks blacker than the black hole.

iii tried some of his coffee one time and spat it all in your face. ivy watched with his hell coffee in hand as you beat the shit out of iii

yeah, safe to say ivy was banned from having that kind of coffee for a while

so yeah. that pretty much sums up the kind of person ivy is

[delusionalwriter02]

hello i saw ur insta as ada member and i loved it!!! can you do it but with the port mafia ?? thank you

Insta as a Port Mafia's member

a/n : hey dear!! thank you so much for your request, I had SO MUCH fun writing this, hope you'll like it<33

<3 liked by Higucci, Gintonic and 753 others.

Yn_theoneandonly : my girl is trainingggg @.Higucci

Chu_uya : to train is to doubt your ability

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : she'll kick your ass

↳ Gintonic : all of us

↳ Chu_uya : what did I do again ??

↳ Higucci : just shut the fuck up and you'll be fine

↳ Daze_i : love to see you're still being bullied

↳ Chu_uya : I should have killed you in your mother's womb

↳ Daze_i : have fun finding her!!!!

The_Hirotsu : Gin you received a letter, I put it on your desk

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : we can receive letters ????

↳ The_Hirotsu : Of course we can

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : BOSS I WANT A MEETING RN

↳ M_Mori : What it is this time ?

↳ Yn_theonenandonly : SINCE WHEN ARE WE ALLOWED TO RECEIVE LETTERS ??

↳ M_Mori : Since forever

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : And I was the only one not knowing this ??

↳ Gintonic : apparently

↳ Chu_uya : you have fans or something ?

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : ALL THE TIMES I COULD HAVE HAD MY PACKAGES DELIVERED TO THE OFFICE

↳ The_Hirotsu : Why at the office ?

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : I spend most of my time there, it could have been so much easierrrrrrrr

↳ M_Mori : Well..... I'm glad you're aware now

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : WE'RE NOT FINISHED BOSS

<3 liked by Yosanurgirl, Gintonic and 280 others.

Yosanurgirl : THAT'S the Port Mafia

Yn_theoneandonly : @.Chu_uya @.Akutagawa @.Tachi_h @.Paupol what went through your mind ?

↳ Chu_uya : I can explain

↳ Tachi_h : no you can't, it was Akutagawa's idea

↳ Akutagawa : NO IT WAS NOT

↳ Higucci : so ? who was in charge ?

↳ Chu_uya : We can't say it, it's confidential

↳ Paupol : Very confidential

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : Verlaine, talk.

↳ Gintonic : Akutagawa ?

↳ Daze_i : mannnnn we never did that back then, the mafia is fun only when I leave

↳ Yn_theonenandonly : shut up, I want the tea

↳ Higucci : we're waiting

↳ Gintonic : Okay let me explain, if you don't tell us, I will be waiting at your door with so many tools it will take 10 lives to use them all, so, speak.

↳ Chu_uya : IT WAS HIROTSU'S IDEA HE WAS MAD BECAUSE THE SECURITY DIDN'T LET HIM SMOKE THERE SO HE ASKED US TO DESTROY THE PLACE AND THEN TAG

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : wtf

↳ Akutagawa : DAMN IT WHY CAN'T YOU JUST KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT

↳ Daze_i : I like it open

↳ Tachi_h : YOU SHUT UP YOU'RE NOT HELPING, CHUUYA MAN REALLY ???

↳ Chu_uya : BE MAD AT THE GIRLS NOT ME

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : @.The_Hirotsu care to explain ? it's childish, I would have expected it from them but from you ??

↳ Paulpol : I feel INSULTED

↳ Higucci : you ARE

↳ The_Hirotsu : I have things to do, see you never

↳ Gintonic : wtf is wrong with you

↳ Daze_i : well it all started when I was a baby

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : fuck imma sleep, you're all just a bunch of idiots

<3 liked by Atsushiii, Daze_i and 863 others.

Yn_theoneandonly : they were SO scared @.Chu_uya @.Akutagawa pussy

Atsushiii : Aku you're just playing rough but you're a real softie

↳ Akutagawa : imma dismember you

↳ Atsushiii : Yosano already did it, be original for once

↳ Daze_i : I raised you so well Atsushi !!!

↳ Akutagawa : don't fucking encourage him

Chu_uya : I wasn't scared I do this all the time

↳ Gintonic : being in an attraction ?

↳ Chu_uya : NO BEING IN THE AIR

↳ Daze_i : being so far from the ground is helping with your superiority complex ?

↳ Chu_uya : Imma pray for you

↳ Daze_i : huh ?

↳ Chu_uya : Pray for you to just kill yourself

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : that wasn't nice at all, apologize rn Chuuya

↳ Chu_uya : ME ??

↳ M_Mori : Apologize to Dazai.

↳ Chu_uya : BOSS ???? I always knew he was your favorite. I'm sorry Dazai

↳ Daze_i : good little dog, you deserve a reward

↳ Chu_uya : IMMA KILL YOU MYSELF

↳ Gintonic : they'll forever fight like child these two

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : Yeah I guess

OzuKoy : Next time we should go with the ADA, it's been so long since I saw you @.Yosanurgirl

↳ Yosanurgirl : yessss my girl we'll plan that

↳ Tachi_h : I'll never understand how you can be all friends girls

↳ Yosanurgirl : because we're smarter and actually enjoy the company of peoples

↳ Tachi_h : bullshit

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : Talk to her like that again, c'mon I dare you

↳ Tachi_h : OH I REALIZED I forgot something at home

↳ Higucci : Yeah run for it

Ranthebestpo : @.p0e I bet 16000 yen that by the end of the weak, we'll have a big event with the Port Mafia

↳ p0e : bet

<3 liked by Ranthebestpo, Akutagawa and 1040 others.

Yn_theoneandonly : I still think reserving an entire cinema is excessive

Yosanurgirl : No it wasn't excessive AT ALL, you saw how none of them can behave

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : They were SO annoying

↳ Higucci : I'm glad we had a whole part of the room for ourselves

↳ Gintonic : If we didn't I would have murdered them before the end of the movie

↳ OzuKoy : And I would have joined

↳ Kyô_ka : It was nice seeing you again

↳ The_Hirotsu : Thank you for letting me sit with you

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : No problem papi, you're far from being the worst one

↳ Chu_uya : SO HE WAS ALLOWED AND NOT ME ??

↳ Gintonic : you talk allllll of the time, I would have knocked you out

Chu_uya : Dazai I swear you're the worst

↳ Daze_i : ?????? you had all the popcorn

↳ Chu_uya :Because I PAID for it

↳ Daze_i : sharing is caring

↳ Chu_uya : The thing is, I DO NOT care about you

↳ Daze_i : you care SO MUCH otherwise you wouldn't have gave it to me

↳ Chu_uya : I gave it to you so you'll stop being so clingy

↳ Daze_i : believe what makes you happy

Atsushiii : Aku I'm never sitting next to you ever again

↳ Akutagawa : I'M THE ONE who will never sit next to you

↳ Atsushiii : What makes you think you had the right to drink MY Ice-Tea ??

↳ Akutagawa : I thought it was mine

↳ Atsushiii : You took water

↳ Akutagawa : The water was disgusting

↳ Atsushiii : 🙄

Ranthebestpo : Poe give me my 16000 yen

↳ p0e : I should have known better

↳ Ranthebestpo : 100% yes

FukuZAWA : Thank you Kunikida for the reservation

↳ M_Mori : Yes thank you boy

↳ KunikIDA : It was nothing

Tachi_h : Verlaine you never do that again

↳ Paupol : What ?

↳ Tachi_h : sleeping.

↳ Paupol : What's wrong with sleeping ?

↳ Tachi_h : YOU SNORE SO LOUD IT'S ATROCIOUS

↳ Paupol : my bad

<3 liked by Gintonic, Higucci and 492 others.

Yn_theoneandonly : Hirotsu is a tired nanny

Gintonic : GIRL WHATS THAT CAPTION

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : pure truth

↳ Gintonic : yeah can't say you're wrong

Chu_uya : @.Tachi_h you put sand in my hair

↳ Tachi_h : Gin pushed me

↳ Gintonic : Aku pushed me

↳ Akutagawa : No I didn't

↳ Chu_uya : I don't care who started the dominos, you'll pay for my shampoo

↳ Tachi_h : NEVER YOURS IS TOO EXPENSIVE

↳ Chu_uya : Yes.

↳ The_Hirotsu : Children stop fighting

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : When I say he's a tired nanny

↳ The_Hirotsu : Boss I need vacations

↳ M_Mori : Take them

↳ Gintonic : NO NO HIROTSU STAY BOSS WILL MAKE US WORK

↳ M_Mori : Because normally you don't work ?

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : We work

↳ Chu_uya : Day and night

↳ Tachi_h : even during luch

↳ Gintonic : 24/24 7/7

↳ Higucci : We never sleep

↳ Paupol : Work is what we live for

↳ OzuKoy : We dedicate our life to the Mafia

↳ Akutagawa : Liars

↳ Gintonic : AKU REALLY ?????

↳ Yn_theoneandonly : YOU BASTARD, not you Gin

↳ Tachi_h : MAN SHUT THE FUCK UP

M_Mori : Well, Hirotsu I think we'll be planning those vacations together

↳ The_Hirotsu : Dear Lord, what did I do to deserve this

Hey! Hope you liked it ? I just loved doing it but including all of the characters can be SO complicated

with love <3

[monzaaasharl]

Could you do fic for Toto Wolff with wife reader? She's a musician. Saying ''i love you'' in-between kisses and playing with their partner's hair after a busy week. Then, their child, Jack joins them when they're dancing together. Add something else to it if it's not right. Just something fluff and sweet. Tag me later. Thanks!!!

Music to my ears

A/n:: This is kinda cute tho wtf

Pairing:: Toto Wolff x Wife! Reader

Genre:: fluff

@pear-1206

Driver x Reader Masterlist Monzaaasharl

Y/n was humming a melody softly to herself as she was trying to imagine how the song sounded when she heard someone coming through the front door.

"We're back!" Her husband announced as he'd just picked Jack up from school.

"I'm upstairs!" She shouted to let him know where you were.

She sighed in annoyance because these notes just weren't matching up, and she was too tired for this.

"What's wrong?" Toto asked out of concern.

"It's so difficult, it doesn't sound like how I want it too" She complained.

"Play it for me, I'll tell you if it sounds good"

Reluctantly, she decided to let him listen to what she'd done so far and she played the recording.

It was only instrumental at the moment, she hadn't figured out any lyrics yet, that was always the most tricky part for her.

Toto looks over at her and signalled to her to stand up and walk into his arms, she did so without second thought.

She wrapped her arms around the back of his neck, and he wrapped his around her waist. Slowly swaying in each other's arms whilst listening to the song playing in the background.

He kissed the top of her head as they slow danced.

"I love you so much, my dear", he spoke in an almost whisper.

She felt her cheeks heat up from his comment despite having heard it everyday for many years.

"I love you too, my love", she replied giving him a soft kiss on the lips.

Meanwhile, Jack came running in and wrapped his arms around both of their legs. Toto bent down to pick him up, and placed him on his hip.

Jack leaned his lead into the crook of his father's neck, tired after a long day at school.

Y/n dropped her head onto her husband's shoulder and looked at her sleepy son with a smile on her face.

Toto looked back at her with an equally happy look and kissed her softly, however Jack didn't seem to like this.

"Daddy, ewwww!"

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[katyawriteswhump]

love and other catastrophes at the omega cafe (5.2/8) 🐈‍⬛

Here's the rest of today's chapter. I hope you enjoy 💚 

Summary: Steve is a runaway Omega who gets a job at an Omega café, where he’s basically paid to curl up and purr in Alphas’ laps. It’s legal, and he earns a living, rents his own place. He’s getting along fine for a packless Omega. Then Alpha rockstar Eddie Munson turns up for an hour of ‘kitty’ petting, and shatters Steve’s fragile little world…

Rating: E; CW: reference to past drug use; Tags: omega steve, alpha eddie, a/b/o dynamics, fluff and angst, sexual content 💚 

Chapter 1 on tumblr (also index post) Chapter 2 on tumblr Chapter 3.1 Chapter 3.2 Chapter 4.1 Chapter 4.2 Chapter 5.1

Chapter 5.2

Eddie placed Steve back on his feet. A cool wind cleaved between them, and Steve wrapped his arms around himself and shivered. Before Eddie could do anything about it, Robin stomped toward them. “Get inside, Steve, before you catch your death!”

“Seriously?” Steve rolled his eyes and retreated into the apartment. Eddie disappeared behind the screen to get changed, acutely aware that Robin remained, waiting on the other side.

“You do realise how far you’ve gone?” she hissed. “If you drop him now, he’ll get rejection sickness.”

 “I’m deadly serious about this, Ma’am. That’s why we’re courting.”

“Is that what you say to all of them? Huh? Huh? How many Omegas have you been with this year? This month?”

“Listen, since I arrived in this city, I’ve honestly towed the line as your bonafide rockstar monk. Even at ‘Kitties’, I only ever wanted Steve.”

“Before that?”

For a moment, Eddie considered dropping his tone below an Omega’s hearing range. In case Steve was listening. Then he felt an asshat for it and spoke in his normal voice. “Look, I’ve never courted anyone before. Yeah, I’ve had plenty of sex—Betas, Alpha on Alpha, you freakin’ name it, sister. And I’ve helped more than a few willing Omegas through their heats. Ya know, one-heat stands and then swapsies to help me through my ruts, plus a bunch of one-night stands.”

He cringed. Truth was, he had few regrets. He didn’t even believe he’d left too long a trail of broken hearts. Everything had been so casual, beginning to end. When the sex got out of hand—like the nasty white powder he’d snorted before every concert a year or so back—he’d worked hard to kick the habit. With the help of his friends.

He still wished he’d saved himself for Steve. Wtf? WTF?

“I’m not so different from most Alphas.” He dragged on his pants, which proved an effort what with his lingering dampness and other jutting obstacles. “We are known for spreading our wild oats.”

“Yeah, but you’re more an industrial seed spreader. How do I know you’re not gonna kick Steve like he’s another bad habit and leave him to rot?”

She was slashing him open, right here in his own apartment. His instinct was to chew her head off. Instead, as he emerged from behind the screen, he’d gotten his hands clasped imploringly.

“I swear, I could never hurt him. I’ve never felt like this before. I’d literally die to protect him. Please, if you’d just trust me?”

A beat passed. He grew aware that Steve was drawing close again. His peachy-floral-vanilla scent spiralled up Eddie’s nostrils. It made him crazy-happy, even under Robin’s withering glare.

“I’m watching you,” she said. Then her lips twisted into a smirk. “I’m watching you both. You’re ridiculously cute together. Don’t ruin it.”

The meal passed smoothly enough. Robin had thawed, and Eddie talked fairly openly about rehab—the time he went in for his coke addiction, at any rate. Robin and Wayne got along famously, as did Wayne and Steve, who started chatting about hockey. The topic always bored the crap out of Eddie. His brain still raced ahead to some magical evening when they’d watch a game together, and he could piss them off yelling for the ‘wrong’ side.

Steve, meanwhile, relaxed into a cute, playful mood that Eddie found totally infectious.

Yeah, they giggled and played footsie. Yeah, Eddie squeezed Steve’s knee every time he got the faintest chance. When Steve complained he was stuffed, Eddie slid his hand up and under Steve’s now untucked shirt to feel the faint swell of that glorious little tummy.

And… yes, yes, oh fuck, YES, BABY!

Steve’s fingers wandered tentatively across Eddie’s thigh more than once, darting back before he’d gotten his hand over Eddie’s dick.

“Looking for something?” whispered Eddie eventually, voice tight, because he’d gotten more-than-a-semi throbbing away again.

When Steve answered with a gasp of mock innocence, Eddie grabbed his hand and shoved it there. “See what you’re doing to me, Omega.”

Steve’s giggles grew so excited he hiccupped loudly, distracting the Betas from their animated conversation. “So, Eddie,” said Robin, with a terrifying smile, “when exactly were you gonna tell Steve you’ve gotten several gigs coming up, like, on the other side of the continent?”

“It’s hardly a state secret,” answered Eddie, breezily enough. “The world and their mother can look up Corroded Coffin’s schedule online.” Guilt clanged, all the same. He honestly hadn’t wanted to think about it, let alone talk about it. To be brutal, since he’d met Steve, all of his former priorities, including touring and recording their new album, had felt trivial.  “I’ll be gone for less than a fortnight,” he said to Steve, dead earnest now. “It won’t get in the way of our courting.”

“When do you go?” asked Steve.

“In three days.” Steve’s shoulders slumped a little, and Eddie grimaced. Those days would be packed with rehearsals, unless he really blew the guys off on this. “Sorry.”

“I’m cool,” said Steve, then, with a sniff, “you better call.”

I don’t want to call you. I want you to come with me.

The words teetered on the tip of Eddie’s tongue. Then Robin leaped up, causing her chair to clatter behind her and nearly topple. “It’s nearly midnight. Steve, we gotta go.”

They parted with hugs and smiles, although Steve seemed slightly subdued.

Once they’d gone, Eddie wanted to slap himself, and only just drew back from kicking a hole in the wall.

He’d fucked up. Steve was gone. Despite all his burning desire to protect the Omega, he was the one who’d wound up hurting him.

He was gonna have to think about the gigs. He was gonna have to be all fucking adult and responsible and think everything through. Because the idea of being without Steve, even for a day or so, was a freakin’ miserable one.

On the other hand, Corroded Coffin gigs were noisy and chaotic, a melting pot of aggressive Alpha scents. They were hardly a great hang-out for any Omega. Certainly not one who reacted so strongly to music.

And specifically, to Eddie’s music.

Wayne headed to bed as soon as they’d finished clearing up. Eddie had way too much restless energy to sleep. He changed into his slouchiest sweatpants and headed out onto the veranda, clutching a bourbon.

Which he placed, untouched, beside a swing sculpted to look like an enormous coconut. Gazing out across the twinkling lights of the city, he tried to focus, to think stuff through.

It was darn impossible. His need for the Omega was visceral, an agony that twisted in his heart, his mind… and, yeeeeeah, his dick.

The distant ding of the elevator cut through the quiet. A fresh wisp of Steve’s scent reached Eddie’s accelerating breaths, and those torturously tight knots inside him began to release.

He rushed forward to greet his Omega. Steve kinda tripped through the veranda doors and tumbled into Eddie’s opened arms: “What the heck are you doing here, Steve? Where’s Robin?”

“I ditched her,” said Steve. “She thinks I’m home in bed. Love her to bits, but she was… cramping my style. We need to talk. Like, properly talk.”

Eddie agreed, but his mind was veering farther than ever from clarity. His hands slid up around Steve’s face. Their bodies notched together so perfectly, and Steve was literally melting into him.

With an effort, Eddie eked out words that weren’t entirely dictated by physical needs. “What do you want to know, Baby? Whatever it is, just ask.”

“Well, I kinda wanted to talk about me, not just you, and…um…" Steve trailed off, fretting his lower lip. Eddie let rip instead, words tumbling from him, barely coherent, before he could stop himself:

“You’re safe with me, Steve. You’ll always be safe with me. When you offered yourself at the café, all the mindfulness, tranqs, all the months of therapy… It flew straight outta the window. I wanted you… It was agony… but I couldn’t hurt you. I never want to hurt you.”

“Woah! That’s a lot.” Steve was smiling. Eddie’s lust-addled brain took it as a win. “All of it good. I trust you, Eddie, which is why…” He winced slightly, trailing off.

Eddie glided one of his hands to Steve’s nape. “What is it, Baby?”

“You know what part of your music really flipped me out? It was the lyric ‘home.’ From your lips. Honestly, in that moment, you could’ve done anything with me. I was ready to roll over, offer all I got. I guess… we weren’t ready.”

Eddie wracked his brain. Home. Something about ‘the death-knell dialling home?’

He’d almost forgotten that lyric, which seemed throwaway and unimportant now. Though he was damn sure Steve was the one who’d gotten those creative juices flowing again, and…

…Steve wanted a home. With Eddie. After less than a week knowing each other.

Eddie was fiiiine with that.

Yeah, it was quick. Wayne and Robin would both have plenty to say about it. Right now, Eddie couldn’t give a rat’s ass. Steve perfumed the cool night air like a counter at Macy’s, and Eddie was releasing a cloud of aroma you could probably smell on that near-full moon.

His blood thundering in his ears, he tuned back into Steve’s quiet voice.

“Look, I’m not asking you to offer me that home, not without knowing me better. There’s stuff I need to tell you, serious stuff, and… Oh!”

Animal instincts kicked in. Eddie swept Steve up into his arms, like earlier. Steve reacted instantly, reclining bonelessly. His head flopped backward, and he offered up his pale throat, unsullied by any mating bite, to Eddie.

Eddie’s gaze drilled through layers of suddenly translucent skin and into Steve’s pulsing veins. His lips peeled back, and… HOLY FUCK, NO MUNCHIES YET, MUNSON! Steve, fortunately, lifted his head back up: “Alpha,” he murmured, eyes glazed and spacey. “I-I’m ready for that kiss Robin interrupted.”

Eddie knew his smile remained savage. “I’d say I’m ready too, Omega.”

Steve inhaled sharply and closed his eyes. Eddie closed in.

At the featherlight touch of lips, relief and excitement raced through Eddie in equal measures. He moved his mouth caressingly, savoring the pure, perfect flavor of his Omega, inhaling Steve’s sweet sigh. Steve slid fingers up into Eddie’s hair, tangled, tugged and clung, urging Eddie on.

Finally, Eddie slid his tongue between those butter-soft lips, claiming a kiss that he was damn sure he’d craved his entire life.

Chapter 6.1

Chapter 6 on AO3

Thank you so very much for reading. If you enjoyed, every little like and reblog or comment means a lot to me so thank you💚

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On AO3

[wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee28374728]

An incomplete list of funny ways that the flamethrower guy in Until Dawn phrases the wendigo rules that imply other funny things. May add more later

He says that cannibalism out of desperation or greed is what causes it. This implies that accidental or just casual cannibalism for funsies won't do it

He says that any MAN or WOMAN who resorts to cannibalism will become a wendigo, implying that now, with so many more genders other than male and female recognized, and the fact that a lot of Native Americans recognized many genders, those people can cannibalize as much as they need to

He specifically says that it only works ON the mountain, so if you drag whoever you want to eat just to the base of the mountain to eat them, you're fine, while the ghost/spirit thing watches from the edge of the mountain like "you motherfucker"

That I know of, there aren't any death scenes that look anything like how he described the wendigo will kill you all slow and skin you and stuff while he was trying to get Chris to come back to the lodge. That means he likely made that up to scare Chris into coming back inside (if I'm wrong and there is a death scene like that that I just haven't found, idk, throw rocks at me)

He says they only hunt at night, but doesn't know why. They could just go back to normal like a werewolf or regain their human senses for a bit, because he said they only hunt at night, and a lot of their hunting is down in the mines where sunlight isn't even a factor, so it's not sunlight that bugs them. Maybe they just all just chill out during the day and play twister.(I just know they'd be good at twister)

Edit: wtf happens if someone who cannibalized AT SOME POINT, but not on the mountain, comes up to the mountain later? Will they just instantly start changing, or can the spirit not do anything in that case?

Double edit: what if you manage to take a wendigo OFF the mountain. Will the spirit follow and it'll stay the same. Would it change back, or just regain its human mind but stay all thin and creepy? Would it die? Would it lose its power? If it did stay the same, would that allow ALL the seperate spirits to leave the mountain and then no one can eat people anywhere?

Edit 3: I am officially adding these tags to the post. You deserve it 😜🙃 @seerya 4 some reason being called op makes me feel really good

Edit 4: I am asking for a friend. I 100% didnt eat anyone 😇

Edit 5: ok, so my 12 year molars that never erupted and confuse the dentist just started coming in in the 10 or so hours since I made this post 🤔 so maybe I lied about not having any wendigo problems cause this hurts like a motherfucker

Edit 6: I realize that this post makes it very ambiguous whether or not I have, in fact, cannibalized. And I'm going to leave it that way. For all y'all knew I was always a weird crypid

[yuhi-san]

Onto volume 3!

The looks vash and ww share at the end last volume and now. Ww’s first though is that vash knows what s up and also is a bastard. Which yeah, but also I think vash look says clearly “I know I can trust you with this”. despite the ordeal with rai-dei that clearly still affects them – especially Wolfwood – vash seems certain on where Wolfwood stands in that fight. I mena, after his immediate reaction to leonofs play…

I love seeing Wolfwood fight. No words to eloquently describe it but damn

I think it’s very interesting how many people (including ww) that fight vash see the pain, the anger, the emptiness and all in his eyes. And they are not WRONG but at the same time no one seems to realize that despite this all, vash still is full of genuine love and hope as well. with vash that is not mutually exclusive.

The tiny interlude of meryl, milly, Jessica and the tomas is sending me

They never say it but c’mon, its clear vash has AT LEAST a general idea what wolfwoods deal is or at the very least that has ulterior motives and is not just tagging with vash for the fun of it. At the same time, literally none of the gung ho guns has even a silver of trust in ww loyalty. Which, fair enough. I don’t think ww has much of a set loyalty at that point beyond  trying not to die and keeping the orphanage as save as he can.

Okay, look, vash is getting through a lot, all the time. And I know there is worse to come, yet what leonof does to vash with the puppets looking like the people from home attacking him and just…. Everything about that is a special case of fucking evil man.

Listen I like manga brad but his hairstyle….

Vash trying to save Emilio despite it all. Uff

Milly and meryl to wolfwoods rescue. What a break in the tension haha. Sorry ninelives, you weren’t prepared for them

There is something objectively really funny about meryl and milly in this. like, they just so happened to find Jessica, get back to the hidden city vash calls home, accidentally save Wolfwood and then just.. decide, jup we gotta help nurse that one. like they have so little context for the whole mess, for this hidden city, anything really. Hell, they barely have context for Wolfwood! They literally just met him briefly on the bus ride after he nearly dried up in the desert… then they saw him two years later with vash during the whole assassin insurance agent thing but it’s not like they said anything to him then. Even funnier from the point of view of the people there. “you know that guy?” – “sorta. He’s a priest we met once when he was stranded in the desert like two years ago. Come to think of it, last we saw him he was with vash”

not to mention how do they know vash? well they are working for an insurance company investigating all the property damage vash causes

Home took quite the hit and oh man vash feels so guilty about it all but luida makes it clear he is family and if anything, he and Wolfwood saved them. And judging by the other peoples reaction or lack of disagreement, they see it like that too. Like vash feels he needs to do it all alone and there are many people out there that hurt him but there are also the people that love him so, so much

Oh Wolfwood. Whatever he’s dreaming, it has him sniffle… but as soon as he wakes up he’s like, wtf and ouch, then the next thing he does is argue with vash. in like the span of two pages

so, vash thanking Wolfwood who immediately points out that he killed. To which Vash acknowledges that is true but also that Wolfwood spilling blood did save a lot of people. That is what I meant in my last post about ‘vash being too caught up in his own way of living’ and his personal moral code. What happened at home doesn’t make vash change his own actions or believes but I think he realized in that moment that he wasn’t fair to Wolfwood before. It was a bit of a reality check id say. He accused Wolfwood of being a coward and giving up easily, but it’s not at all about taking the easy way out for Wolfwood. Its him doing what he can and NEEEDS to in order to keep himself and other save. vash may not agree with it but he’s starting to understand Wolfwood better. I think vash is so used to do things on his own and not having companions for any extended periods of time that it can be easy to forget that what applies for you will not applies for others or be feasible. Or the only right thing to do.

Vash showing the girls the deep sleep chambers. I think there is something really sweet to it. Like he’s so happy to show them something that is also special to him.

See, we know knives sent Wolfwood to be vash’s guid or whatever you wanna call it. So it’s kind of easy to forget (and I haven’t quite realized the degree of it before reading trimax) how little Wolfwood actually knows. I mean, he did impersonate chapel so… right until he met vash ans knives in jeneora rock, Wolfwood clearly had no idea what these two were capable off. And he has realized vash isn’t your regular human but I think only after seeing the picture with Jessica does he realize truly just how far away from human vash is. Like, some of the gung ho guns, even ww, push whats normal human too but vash is another level.

The conversation with ww and luida. It gives us some insight on vash. but its also kinda funny because it basically boils down to:

WW: what the fuck is he and what the hell is his deal?

Luida: well, hes not really human but he’s not trying to set himself apart much. Been around for a really long time, most of which is actually really horrible for him. But he’s just out there, trying to help where he can, being kind, just an overall nice guy don’tcha think?

I’m not actually sure how much luida really knows about vash. she sure knows about knives and I think july and stuff too aand obviously how he doesn’t really age and all. But I’m not sure she knows about the fall or vash as an independent plant specifically. But I don’t think it even matters in that scene. Because what she says is yes, vash is not a normal human but she puts all the focus on what kind of PERSON he is above everything else.

Which I think is especially perfect with Wolfwood, who at that point is still very much struggling to understand vash beyond the rumors, the destruction and his unnatural… everything. Mostly because vash as a person isn’t making much sense to ww currently (its ok ww vash is a complicated guy)