#I definitely think a lot of things could’ve been handled better though. so don’t just assume that I’m like

[calmbigdipper]

sooo it’s been a couple of days since I went to Miku Expo and like… I think I’m still reeling from the fact that I actually went since I’ve been listening to vocal synth music since my childhood and I never expected that I’d actually be able to go to one of these concerts?

some thoughts and highlights under the cut!

the show I went to was sold out (in D.C.) and I stood in line + waited for like, 6 or 7 hours? but I had so much fun that it was worth it!

I helped some people put film inside their penlights, and it was nice chatting with them while we were waiting!

some groups of elderly people who were hanging out in the area were confused about what was going on and after asking some concert-goers to explain they started laughing LMAO (some puzzled passerby’s asked me too and I just said “oh it’s a J-pop concert!” because I didn’t want to go into what Vocaloid was in full detail haha)

there were so many cute cosplays there; I saw a lot of people in Miku’s Vampire outfit and was surprised to also see an Oliver cosplayer, there were also some dressed as Project Sekai characters too!

before the show, every time someone in the audience held up a Miku plush, everyone around them would cheer and hold up their penlights

some people also brought Miku plushes that were bald and whenever they held up those, everyone would shout “BALD, BALD, BALD!” (and I heard someone say “MY EYES!!!”)

the songs the crowd were the loudest for were Miku, Vampire, and World is Mine (it was… so loud during World is Mine LOL)

Kaito fans were being Kaito fans when he did his solo (ILY Kaito fans you’re so iconic) and there was also a notable amount of hype when Luka’s solo finally happened since it took until halfway through the show to get to her

I know the setlist was quite controversial when it was released online but I honestly liked hearing it in person, I feel like the band really elevated the experience (kudos to them!), I really liked how they played for Literacy and Hyper Reality Show in particular

and maybe a hot take but the screen wasn’t… that bad to me? but that was also because I was in the very front and the venue put lights around the stage as well, so I may be biased

[cupidcures]

When Tulips Kiss | Hwang Hyunjin SMAU

CHAPTERS: 𝜗𝜚 TWENTY-EIGHT | TWENTY-NINE | 𝜗𝜚 THIRTY

WORD COUNT: 3k (not proofread)

CONTAINS: profanity, mentions of insecurities, mentions of cheating, soft boy hyunjin finally appears!

the second time?

“Wow… And here I thought you guys were actually getting somewhere.” Changbin sighed disappointedly while shaking his head at the same time. “I gotta give it to you though, you’ve got some fucking balls. I think the guy deserved the beating for instigating shit like that, to be honest. He was provoking you and he simply got what he was asking for, it was clear he wanted a reaction out of you.”

After Jeongin had left, the rest of the guys went inside Hyunjin’s room, demanding an explanation. So here they were, giving him their commentary and opinions on what happened.

“I was on your side up until the part you said you called Y/N a bitch and lashed out at her as well. You can’t blame her for checking up on the guy, he took a lot of hits, and MAYBEEEEE you went a little overboard. But like Changbin said, he was asking for it. Though, she could’ve done something to defend you.” Felix butted in as Hyunjin sat there quietly, nodding with each comment his friends add on.

“I wish I could take everything back. Well actually, I could live with knowing I beat Heeseung up twice, but hurting Y/N? Holy shit I’m literally setting myself up for failure.” Hyunjin covered his face with his hands and dragged his cheeks down, groaning.

“You should apologize as soon as possible. Even if you think she won’t forgive you, it’s better to apologize as soon as you can, rather than wait it off.” Chan patted Hyunjin’s back in comfort before smacking the back of his head.

“Hey!”

“Don’t start complaining now, that was barely anything compared to what you did to the poor dude.”

“Yeah yeah.. What do I even tell Y/N? She probably doesn’t even wanna talk to me.” Resting his chin on his hand, Hyunjin’s mind flashed with outcomes one after the other of what could end up happening when he apologized.

“If you really want to make things right, you need to tell her everything. And I mean EVERYTHING. Stop pussying out of telling her your side of what happened in high school. If you told her from the very start and if you weren’t stalling, this all could have been avoided. In fact, I’m almost positive that she would have stood up for you when Heeseung started talking all that shit.“ Minho rolled his eyes as Chan nodded at him in agreement.

“Tell her everything that you felt too. Not just what you think happened. You need to be clear with your feelings and how your mind processed everything. Be vulnerable with her, and she’ll open up to you.” Chan offered additional advice. “And for fucks sake, do NOT do this over text. This is something that is meant to be talked about IN PERSON.”

“She would probably slam the door in my face if I showed up. She definitely hates me now,” Hyunjin mumbled and pinched his nose bridge in annoyance, but he wasn’t annoyed at you. He was annoyed at himself.

How could he have been so reckless to break down all the progress the two of you had built up together?

“So what? Face it. At least you could tell yourself that you tried, and at least you could let her know that you’re trying to make things right.” Felix put his hand on Hyunjin’s shoulder with a determined look. “And don’t give up so easily either! I believe you can make things right!”

“Yah! You’re Hwang Hyunjin and you could get any and every girl you want, remember?! You got this! You can get your girl back, even if it takes longer than usual!! You just need to put in more effort!” Changbin joined in with Felix on the encouragement whilst wearing a smile on his face.

“She’s not just any other girl though. She’s everything to me and I can’t bear to think of the fact that I even hurt her. I fucked up really badly. I’ve already lost her once, I don’t think I can handle losing her again.” Hyunjin wallowed in his sadness as Minho let out a rather loud groan.

“Oh shut up and get your ass off the bed. YOU. ARE. GOING. Right now. You don’t wanna lose Y/N? The longer you wait to see her and apologize to her the more time you give her to slip through your fingers. Get your sorry ass up and show her just how sorry you are.” Minho grabbed Hyunjin’s car keys and shoved them into his hand before dragging him out of his room, through the hallway and the living room, and practically throwing him outside of the house.

“GO. APOLOGIZE.” Minho shouted sternly for the last time before slamming the door in his face.

Hyunjin blinked in surprise, not expecting this to happen at all. Despite that, he composes himself together and gets inside his car to rush on campus—to your dorm room—praying to anyone, anything up above who would listen to his hopes of you letting him explain everything.

~

Chuu was in the kitchen talking to her girlfriend on Facetime when she heard the knocking on the door entrance. Glancing at the top of her phone screen to check the time, it read that it was 11:23 PM.

“What the fuck? Who could be knocking at this hour?” Chuu whispered over the phone, her grip on it tightening subconsciously.

“Huh? Is everyone in the dorm already there?” Sooyoung, her girlfriend, asked in concern.

“Well, no. But they said they’ll be gone for the weekend. Should I open it?” Chuu looked at the door nervously, a small shiver running up her spine.

“Check through the peephole just in case. Be careful.” Sooyoung warned as Chuu nodded and slowly crept to the door, peeking out through the hole in the door.

Standing there was Hyunjin who was checking the watch on his wrist. Chuu watched him intently, confused as to why he was there.

“It’s just Hyunjin, Y/N’s… friend? I guess you could say that?” Chuu was still unaware of what happened that day, and so she still thought you and Hyunjin were friends. She watched Hyunjin look down at the floor and turn away. It wasn’t until he started walking away that Chuu finally opened the door.

“Hey, you here for Y/N?” She called out as Hyunjin’s head perked up, turning back around towards the dorm.

“Yes, actually. It is okay if I could come in and talk with her?” He asked awkwardly and fidgeted with his fingers, nervous that he’d get rejected without even having the chance to see you face to face. To his relief, Chuu nodded at his request and opened the door wider.

“Yeah, sure. She’s in the room, by the way. Don’t do anything inappropriate.” Chuu pointed her finger at his in an accusatory way but laughed right after, indicating that she was just joking around.

Hyunjin laughed along with Chuu a little bit before giving her his thanks and making his way toward the door of your room.

“Okay sorry Honey, I let him in but I’m back now~” Chuu hummed contently and went back to talking with Sooyoung.

Meanwhile, with Hyunjin, he knocked on your door softly so as to not startle you. “Y/N? It’s me, Hyunjin. Can we talk? Please?” He spoke in a gentle tone and waited for a reply. He was met with silence instead, so he considered just walking away and giving up. That was until he remembered his friends’ words to him.

“And don’t give up so easily either! I believe you can make things right!” Felix’s voice echoed in his mind.

“The longer you wait to see her and apologize to her the more time you give her to slip through your fingers. Get your sorry ass up and show her just how sorry you are.” Then Minho’s voice echoed.

They were right, he couldn’t back away now and risk losing you. Not again. Not ever.

“Y/N, I’m coming in, okay? Tell me now if you don’t want to see me tonight and I won’t. But I’ll be back tomorrow.” Hyunjin speaks out and still, no response. So he does what he said he would do, and he opens the door to the bedroom, only to find it empty.

Eyebrows furrowed in confusion, he looked around the room—which wasn’t even big, to begin with—for you, but you were nowhere to be found.

He sighed in disappointment and started to walk out to leave until he heard the door to the bathroom open, and there you were.

You stood there, frozen in shock as you made eye contact with the boy. If you had known that Hyunjin would be there waiting for you, you would have brought spare clothes to the bathroom and changed there instead. But you didn’t know, so you were standing there in a damp towel, water droplets pittering on the floor from your hair.

“I… wow.” Hyunjin’s mouth was agape and blood rushed to his cheeks seeing you. It’s not like he hasn’t seen you like this before. He has literally seen you naked before, but you still had the same effects on him, as if it was his first time seeing you like this. His mind went blank. Or maybe into a frenzy? Either way, he wasn’t thinking straight as he gawked at the sight of you. He was telling himself to look away, but his body wasn’t obeying him.

You stood there with a red face that matched his before grabbing the closest plushie to you and throwing it at his face, smacking him. “Turn around!!” You squealed and tried covering up as much as you could, but there wasn’t much you could do with a towel.

Hyunjin’s eyes widened as he snapped out of it, quickly turning his body around and squeezing his eyes shut.

“Shit… I’m so sorry holy fuck shit damn oh my god.” He cursed as embarrassment overcame him. ‘How long was I staring??? She probably thinks I’m a pervert now. Great!’ Hyunjin thought in his head, mentally losing it.

He heard rustling and shuffling of things behind him before you cleared your throat.

“Ahem.. You can turn around now.” You crossed your arms as Hyunjin turned to look at you with an embarrassed expression on his face.

“What did you need to say?” You got straight to the point and Hyunjin gulped nervously, mentally preparing himself for any possible outcome that may happen from this conversation.

“I’m… Sorry.”

“Is that seriously all you have to say?” You raised an eyebrow and scoffed in irritation.

“No! I mean, no. Sorry for raising my voice.” He licked his lips and took a deep breath in before exhaling.

“I’m so sorry for what happened today. I know I’ve already said it, but I truly am.” He started off apologetically. “I don’t know what came over me, I don’t know what possessed me to say those awful things to you. No words can describe the extent of my regret, I’ve never wished for anything more than to take back the words I said to you. They don’t reflect on what I feel about you at all, not even close.”

Your face softened a bit and you walked towards him, sitting down on the bed as you patted next to you, and he, almost instantly, sat down.

“I believe you. But It still hurt to hear those things, you know?”

“I know. I wish I didn’t hurt you. But fuck, it hurt so much to see you choose Heeseung over me for the second time. I cou—“

“Stop right there. The second time?” You looked at him in confusion, and he looked back.

“The first time was in high school?” He stated, or questioned. He stated it more so to ask if you were aware, but you stared at him, lost.

“…Huh?”

So you didn’t know. He was wrong all along. He doesn’t think this a lot, but this is one of the few times he was glad that he was wrong.

“Back in high school when we were together. I came in a little late for our daily meet up, and I saw you in the library with Heeseung.” Hyunjin clenched his fists at the memory, looking away so you wouldn’t be able to see his face.

“You two were whispering in each other’s ears, laughing. I wasn’t able to hear what you guys were talking about except for one thing. He asked you out on a date, and told you to keep it a secret from me and to make an excuse as to why you couldn’t hang out with me that day. Then he asked for your number, and you gave it to him. I left, because I didn’t want to hear any more. That’s when I started ignoring you. I started pushing you away because I was hurt. I didn’t want to talk to you because I knew that if we talked, I would have automatically forgiven you and I would've let you keep hurting me. I would've let you continue to cheat and I would've pretended to be oblivious to it because at least I got to have you in some way. So I ignored you to spare myself. I lacked the self-respect to confront you about it.” You heard Hyunjin sniff, so you gently grabbed his chin to make him face you, a singular tear running down his face.

He was crying.

You gave him a small, but sad smile. “I wish you would’ve told me, I would have explained everything. Hyunjin, we were talking about you. In a good way, of course. He was asking you what presents to get you for your surprise birthday party the following day. The “date” he asked me on was so we could look for gifts to give to you together. It was nothing like that, I promise you. I loved you too much back then to ever cheat. I wish you trusted me.” Your small smile slowly turned into a small frown instead and you cupped his cheek as he nodded.

“I was stupid. I still am. But fuck, Y/N. You were so perfect. You still are. It scared me. I didn’t deserve you, and I was so scared that you were finally realizing that you deserved more than what I could give you. You deserved better than me, and my insecurities got the best of me. Heeseung is just… so much better than me in so many aspects and I couldn’t help but assume the worst. Taller, smarter, more athletic, and fuck, I’m not even gay and I could tell that the motherfucker is beautiful.” He chuckled a little bit and you giggled at his last statement.

You opened your mouth to say something in disagreement, but Hyunjin beat you to it and held the hand, YOUR hand, that cupped his cheek. “I’m so sorry Y/N, I’m sorry for everything. Please forgive me, I’ll be better I promise. I’ll make it all up to you if you would give me another chance.” He cried as more and more tears bubbled out of his eyes and streamed down his perfect face, and your heart ached at the scene in front of you.

“Hyunjin…” You mumbled softly, but he didn’t seem to hear you through all his crying.

“I’m…in love with you Y/N. After all these years I’m still in love with you. I was.. I was in denial at first. I didn’t want to believe that after all this time, after all the effort I took to forget about you and move on, that it was all useless. But there's no denying it anymore. I love you. I want— no. I NEED you. I don’t want to lose you again.” Hyunjin got up from beside you, only to drop down to his knees in front of you, bringing your hands to his forehead.

“You don’t even have to love me back. I know you don’t. Just please…” He sobbed, “Please don’t leave me. I can handle us just being friends. I’m fine with that just please don’t leave me. I don’t want to live a life that you’re not in.” Hyunjin begged brokenly, looking up at you with pleading eyes, tears flowing endlessly.

You could feel yourself tearing up and your lips quivered as you knelt down to his level and hugged him.

“You fucking idiot. You’ll always be better than Heeseung in my eyes. You’re perfect to me. I’m not leaving you, not ever. I may not love you anymore, but you’re my friend. You have me, okay? Please stop crying, I hate seeing you like this. Honestly, I’ll still need time to fully accept your apology and forgive you, you were a real asshole today. But just know, I’ll forgive you eventually, and I’m not leaving.” You sniffled as he buried his face into your neck, attempting to stop.

“Thank you so much. I don’t deserve you, you’re an angel.” He whimpered and wrapped his arms around your waist.

You guys sat there for a while in each other’s embrace, and you waited until the cries died down to pull away and caress his cheek.

You stared into his bloodshot eyes, and he stared into yours. Even after crying his eyes out, you still thought he was the most beautiful man to exist. You offered Hyunjin a smile as he weakly smiled back.

“I’m getting sleepy, can I sleep now?” You giggled as his face turned red, immediately getting up.

“Shit, I'm sorry. I’ll get going now. Thank you for keeping me as a friend, I won’t ever hurt you ever again.” He took your hand and helped you get up before giving you one last hug.

“You don’t need to thank me for that, I want to keep you in my life too, silly. Now get going.”

You walked him out of the dorm room and waved goodbye, watching the silhouette of his figure grow smaller and smaller, until he was out of site.

What a day.

a/n: hi!!!! sorry for the slow update, i’ve been busier lately and i’ll be starting my senior year in college soon so i hope you guys understand 🥲 anyways.. i hope you guys liked this chapter! hyune got friendzoned lololol

𝜗𝜚 WTK series masterlist

TAGLIST (OPEN)! @jeonginplsholdmyhand @jeonginsgirl @mlrroh @mafiulaputaama @seungzsmin @hannie-bees @skz1lov @porang-poranglinos @sillyhal @mitchii @soulphoenix1618 @gnab-nahc @hyunjins-dimples @nappynapnaps @15092000volcano @livixcore @linocvp1d @yaorzu-blog @scallywag1299 @boo-ven9eance @lys4lix @kirbrary @4ln-stay8 @sellomaybe @aznstoner @saintcosette @starseungs @syedazarintasnim @elqivxstxr @ivydoesit23 @weirdowithaphone @hyuneee3 @nhyunn @velvetmoonlght @amarecerasus @skzstan12345 @ravengxbss @sweetbokji

[flowervolcano]

DEADPOOL #7 SPOILERS AHEAD!!

I’ve warned you. Now I’m gonna talk and share some images, this is about Taskmaster and Ellie, because there’s much I’ve been thinking about—

I loved the comic, I was a little sad there wasn’t an actual reaction to coming home and finding Wade dead, but it’s better to move forward instead of spending too much time in one spot. Watching how Ellie is deals with this definitely had my heartstrings tugged, even though she thinks she’s not in the denial stage, she actually is.

It’s shown very well, her unwillingness to accept he’s really gone. That she doesn’t want to believe that’s true because she just got him back. Excellent way to establish her grief. I feel so much for her, I’ve always loved Ellie, so getting to read more about her and seeing her inner thoughts, love that so much!

As for Taskmaster; We get nothing from his end, which makes a lot of sense, this isn’t really about him and he is way too professional to let this trip him up. Tasky made a promise after all, making sure Ellie gets through this is more of his priority now. And I really LOVED the undertones written into how he handles it with Ellie. It’s not in a traditional sense that most people try with comforting.

But it’s his special way of how he does. And honestly, I love that about his character. He’s not big on heartfelt stuff, emotions or anything of that sort. Not to say he doesn’t understand them, he’s certainly not stupid. Not at all, however, he consciously chose to spend his whole life detached, removing himself from personal things like romance, family, etc. making sure he never got close to anybody so there wouldn’t be any leverage on him.

So I do think that makes him more of an outlier when it comes to dealing with situations like these, he won’t know the exact way to comfort someone, not that it means that he doesn’t care, he’s just never gotten close enough to experience it.

And yet that’s what makes him work well with Ellie, she needs somebody who is gonna keep her grounded, keep an eye on her, let her deal with this in her own time without being coddled too much. This is not to say there isn’t some compassion needed during this moment, she has her sister, Princess to fill that role.

Ellie is going through so much in such little time, but that she doesn’t need someone to baby her and tell her how to grieve, she just needs someone to help her through it. And it’s better than having someone else being emotionally unstable too. So Tasky balances her out well!

Delving into this topic more, I’ve brought along the panels for my talking points and examples, as to why I think he is doing good, and how much I’m loving the way their relationship works. Is he a good father figure? Surprisingly, yes. (Don’t argue. I have my reasons as to why)

You see, after he chewed her out for blowing up a guy with intel they needed, he doesn’t punish her, which he could’ve done just for her messing up the mission, he has no problem calling her out, but he never takes it too far; I will further address this in a moment. But I’m getting off track, in this panel he tells her that watching those videos will just bring her more heartbreak, he is very aware of her goals/emotions, he doesn’t downplay it or tell her how to process things.

He just suggests that it may not be healthy for her in this moment, because he knows she wants to bring her father back, but he doesn’t want her devoting herself to something that will only disappoint her in the end (Tasky really has a heart)

The next part. Tony addresses what to do about Ellie. She says she’s fine, but he knows she’s not. It would be wrong to even say otherwise. He knows it is hard for her. So he gets right to the bottom of it.

After establishing his concern, he explains further as to why he is, Tony made notice of her outburst on the mission and while he could’ve dismissed this and told her to get it together that she can’t grieve forever, he doesn’t. In fact he endorses how she has every right to be pissed off, that he won’t stop her from dealing with those emotions, but he then warns that there’s a place for that to be used. Those feelings can’t interfere with the job, otherwise that can put her in danger more than anything else, if she is not emotionally stable enough she may get distracted and bested in combat.

While those aren’t his words, you know exactly what his words intend. “I can’t have you out there givin’ me a bad rep” is definitely his way of expressing his concern for her without flat out saying “Ellie, you could get yourself hurt if your feelings cloud your mind.” This is sort of where the “punishment” comes in, it’s not addressed exactly, but it is implied that because she is under his name now, she needs to listen to his rules, and he’s not just being her boss or mentor here, he is absolutely playing a father figure role; ignoring the fact that he doesn’t admit this!!!

This moment crushed me— I could go on a very VERY long and intricate discussion on this moment, because that’s when I just KNEW the writers aren’t playing. Ellie is so desperate to bring her Dad back, and Tasky acknowledges it, but is trying his best to not let her get those hopes up, to help bring her into reality without completely crushing her. He knows she wants him back, but there’s nothing that they can do yet. But then makes it very clear he is going to help get revenge on Death Grip, but that they need time and a strategy before they can even consider going toe-to-toe with him.

Quickly mentioning the part where Tasky tells Ellie he made a promise and she replies with”to look after me?” And he’s like NO! I freaking love that, he is NEVER gonna admit that at all, and that’s what we love about him, bro has one of the biggest hearts ever and that’s why he’s so protective over it. (I said what I said)

Might be looking too deep into it, but he is still making sure that she is ACTUALLY able to do this without any problems. Not just for his rep, but for her own good.

And then we have the moment he lets her go out on her own. He knows he’ll have to let her make her own decisions, it’ll help her grow. But yeah. He cares.

Finally, this moment. Genuinely made me laugh. He is going to have so much grey hair working with her!!!

I’m gonna explode over this comic series!!!! I love it soooo much 😭💚

[tragedy-peanut-gallery]

any headcanons about daeron ii's and myriah's sons?

WAUGGHHH YEESSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They’re probably gonna be a bit shorter than the girlies because…….. I hate men I guess /j

Baelor:

- Surprisingly the most normal of Daeron and Myriah’s kids even though the pressure placed on him since birth must’ve been I N S A N E. Probably would’ve snapped at some point if the brown haired gene didn’t come in clutch and neutralize the crazy in him

- And even tho canon tries to imply him having brown hair and a broken nose doesn’t make him as pretty as the other targs……… ignore them king, I KNOW there were probably hundreds of people writing some crazy rpf about this man!!1!1!!

- I also like to think he, Daemon and Daenerys were pretty close as kids. Like, yahhh ik their relationship probably rotted because Baelor was meant to feel inferior to Daemon and vice versa for differing reasons but…. Maybe I wanna make myself cry a bit. Maybe I wanna imagine them playing knights and dragons and stuff 🥲

- Definitely cared for Maekar a lot as his baby brother but also had a lot of trouble not seeing him as anything as his baby brother whichhhh….. probably made him come off as condescending a little okay he’s trying his best

Aerys:

- Asexual AND autistic, sorry I don’t make the rules and I’m not projecting onto him I swear don’t listen to what anyone else may tell you I-

- And the thing is, I’m sure he would’ve absolutely pulled a Vaegon if he could’ve, but honourably decided to stay behind for the sake of securing political allies for the throne (the citadel rejected his application because he cited his only strength as “reading”)

- Poor dude probably had some absolutely shitty sight due to eye strain, reading by candlelight in the dark is all fine and dandy until that becomes the only thing you do

- Ngl probably the biggest social outcast out of his brothers, I think the primary reason he trusted Brynden to handle everything when he became king was because he didn’t have that many friends/allies outside of Aelinor (not a big politics person), Shiera (witch girlie and also Brynden’s kinda gf) and Brynden himself so he was willing to go with whatever they wanted within reason

- Mans has no canonical death despite being a king so I’m personally gonna diagnose him with….. tetanus via iron throne in one of the few times he actually bothered to do king things

Rhaegel:

- I kinda like to think he was an artistic guy, really loved painting and drawing and probably would’ve tried out other mediums like pottery, embroidery and weaving if people didn’t stop him from doing so <3

- Probably dressed a lot more simply as an adult because he hated most fabric textures. Velvet and wool were his least favourites but tbh the only thing he could wear without getting fidgety in ten minutes would be cotton

- Also really hated when people touch his hair ngl! Dude has that really pretty targ men hair gene where it’s really long and flowy but that’s because he doesn’t like cutting it

- Okay tbh I like him but I don’t have that many thoughts on the guy 💀 I like to headcanon he drew a lot of dragons as kids and really liked telling his family what their dragons would look like and what he should name them and all that. His dragon would be light purple with red wings and gold horns and he’d call her Myrri after his mom :)))

Maekar:

- Absolutely the tallest and most athletic out of his brothers but absolutelyyyy suffering from an inferiority complex. No it doesn’t get any better when Baelor dies, if anything it gets much worse :(

- Had an unfortunate habit of getting people to dislike him, not completely his fault tho a lot of folks were just predisposed to thinking him to be kinda intimidating!!!

- Didn’t have a favourite with his kids, but Rhae was absolutely his baby because she was a lot like him when he was little in both looks and attitude lol

- Feeling a little angsty so I’m gonna say he had some memorabilia of Dyanna that he’d keep with him at all times. Like maybe a bit of her hair in a locket, or a portrait he’d keep in his room 🥲

[archivalofsins]

Oh, Yuno's birthday is coming up September 2- Let's worry together.

(Edited: 08/16/2024 10:25 pm Fixed some spelling errors and added some more details that I missed.)

From the start of trial two Milgram has been telling us every way it can that if something happens around Mahiru this trial she won't be able to handle it. Simultaneously Milgram has gone out of it's way to display to the audience that the person nearest to Mahiru is Yuno. As she is the one to engage with her the most in the timelines during trial two.

Even though Shidou is implied to be taking care of her consistently as well.

We actually see Yuno engaging with Mahiru more over the course of this trial and during the intermission of the first. So, I feel it's important to note the individuals frequently near Mahiru since the story has gone out of it's way to highlight how if something goes wrong near her that's it.

This has been done with Shidou a good deal despite him only talking to her once this trial. That's the same amount of times we've seen Futa and Amane talk to her,

23/01/17 (Mahiru’s Birthday)

Amane: Happy birthday. Mahiru-san. How is your body feeling?

Mahiru: ……ah, Amane-chan. Thank you. Yeah, I’m fine. Now I can move around if I use a wheelchair…… It’s all thanks to Shidou-san looking after me……

Amane: I’ll give you one warning. The two of you are dabbling in something tabooed. If you continue to go against the way of nature like this, you’ll just bring an early death upon yourself. Think hard about this.

Mahiru: Amane-chan……? Are you really Amane-chan……?

24/01/17 (Mahiru’s Birthday)

Futa: ……hey. Oi, Mahiru. You’re in pretty bad shape, right……? Isn’t there anything that can be done?

Mahiru: What’s up, Futa-kun? Yeah, I’m not great…… But Shidou-san’s been looking after me…… And he says if we keep going like this, I’ll get much better……

Futa: ……right. As long as treatment continues, huh. …… I wonder how you’re going to be saved.

Mahiru: Saved……? Are you worried about me? …… You’ve been a lot kinder lately, Futa-kun. …… I feel like I’ve been saved just hearing those words from you.

Then despite being alluded to helping her a great deal the only time we see Shidou speak to Mahiru this whole trial is,

23/10/24 (Shidou’s Birthday)

Mahiru: You have a family right, Shidou-san……? How does it feel, being married, having kids……?

Shidou: ……yeah, it’s a wonderful thing. Children…… yeah. They really are hope for the future. When you have your own, suddenly it becomes fun growing old. Since as you grow older, you get to see them grow up.

Mahiru: Ah…… how lovely. It was always my dream to become a bride. Though maybe that seems a bit outdated. I wish it could’ve come true……

Shidou: It isn’t too late. I’m going to make sure you live. So let’s get out of here, and you make your wish come true. ……you still have so much to live for.

Which is pretty much to just trigger a death flag given his track record when it comes to saving people-

"Not dead... Yeah, she's definitely not dead... I finally understand the value of what I've been robbing people of." - "To keep you alive, you are still living."

Shidou, "Trust me Mahiru I can save you. This time will be different."

"“Throw down” it’s ok, that’s enough! Can’t stay away. Please don’t forgive me. That’s why I want this to end “Throw down”."

Those who don't learn are doomed to repeat.

Meanwhile Yuno's proximity to Mahiru has been more than implied. It's been repeatedly shown. Yuno has been engaging with Mahiru since the series began and they've only been implied to have gotten closer. Considering all this emphasis being put on not having anything else happen around Mahiru I think it's reasonable to consider what could happen to those closest to her as well.

This in my opinion includes Yuno since it's been highlighted that she's taken on a pretty understated role when it comes to taking care of Mahiru with Shidou repeatedly.

Hell even before the second trial was even teased actually-

Since before the attacks were even teased,

22/06/22 (Haruka’s Birthday)

Mu: What’s wrong, Haruka-kun? Did something happen? You shouldn’t look away like that when you’re together with me.

Haruka: Ah, s-sorry, Mu-san. Um…… No, it’s nothing. I just, suddenly got a feeling. That something is about to happen.

Mu: Isn’t that because it’s your birthday? Or perhaps it’s a sign the guard is about to wake up again soon? Fufufu, I bet they’ll be really surprised at a lot of things.

Haruka: That, might be true. But, I want the the guard to see. ……the new, me…….

Yuno was there by Mahiru's side. The timeline made this as evident as it could,

22/01/17 (Mahiru’s Birthday)

Mahiru: My birthday…… the day I was born…… But was there really any reason for me being born? Lately I’ve started to wonder that. Do you ever think about stuff like that, Yuno-chan?

Yuno: Eh? Not really. I mean, Mahiru-san, you’re really the romantic type, right? Not that I have anything against that. But isn’t it a bit much to think that everything in life has a meaning? If it makes you happy to think like that then go ahead, but if it doesn’t, then isn’t that in itself meaningless?

Mahiru: : ……you might be right. I’ve always just lived my life like this, so I don’t really know.

Yuno: We’ve all just gone through a bunch of things in life that happened to lead us here. It’s nothing more than a coincidence. Definitely not fate or anything. Probably. Even if there isn’t a meaning, you can still be happy that it’s your birthday. That sort of thing’s all you need in life really. So happy birthday, Mahiru-san.

This is far before the attacks even happened,

22/06/27 (Amane’s Birthday)

Kazui: What’s up, Shidou-kun? You’re looking pretty down. I guess you must be tired, I’ve been relying on you a lot lately.

Shidou: Yeah, I just remembered…… today is Amane’s birthday.

I’m just getting a bit sentimental.

Kazui: Hmm, it’s unfortunate, but at the moment we can’t worry about that. ……you understand, right? There’s something that you need to do right now. And if you tried talking to her your words definitely won’t reach her. Don’t look at me like that. We’ll just wait until the situation changes. Let’s do our best.

Shidou: Yeah. I’ll do what I can. I can’t have a child making a face like that. Even though we’re “murderers”…… we’re also the adults here.

Then they only get closer after,

22/09/02 (Yuno’s Birthday)

Mahiru: ……no, I’m fine. As long as I don’t move too much I don’t even feel any pain. Sorry for making you worry.

Yuno: Oh, really? That’s good then. Mahiru-san, if there’s anything you want then just ask. It’s not like it’s a huge burden, I can just ask for it along with my own stuff.

Mahiru: Ok…… I’m fine for now. Sorry, for making you worry.

Ah, Yuno-chan…… Today’s your birthday, right? Happy birthday.

Yuno: ………… Haha, thanks. Thank you, but y’know. Is it really ok for you to be saying that to me when you’re in that situation? ……you really aren’t suited for Milgram, huh, Mahiru-san.

The timeline continued to display that their closeness was consistent as well. In fact, it's implied to be just as consistent as Shidou's care of Mahiru is if not more,

23/06/27 (Amane’s Birthday)

Amane: What is it…… Kashiki Yuno. Don’t sit so close to me. Go away.

Yuno: Sorry for barging in when you’re getting into your worldview thing. But Mahiru-san’s finally managed to get to sleep. Humour me with some small talk while I take a break. By the way, Amane. Have you ever wished you were never born? I’ve thankfully lived a pretty fun life so far, so haven’t really. But you seem to be struggling with something. So I kinda wondered if you thought like that.

Amane: ……I don’t think that. Being born into this world is the first miracle any person experiences, and is something to celebrate. Even if after birth I was put through trial after trial, the value of that will never disappear.

Yuno: Hmm. Ok. ……happy birthday, then. It’s good that you were brought into the world, I guess.

23/09/02 (Yuno’s Birthday)

Kazui: I heard you’ve been helping Shidou-kun out. ……er, sorry if this comes across as rude, but it’s kind of unexpected. It always seemed like you didn’t care that much about other people.

Yuno: Hmm? What’s with that all of a sudden. I mean, you’re right, I don’t care much. But if there’s someone dying in front of you anyone would do what they could to help, right? And anyway, aren’t you the same? You usually don’t care much either, right?

Kazui: ……I wonder. This old man isn’t as much of a thinker as you are. I mean, until now I’ve been in an environment where it’s all about having physical strength. So I’ve never really thought about stuff like that.

Yuno: Haha, we’re the same in that we’re both liars too. I guess the difference is the reasons we lie. You care about yourself, so lie to protect yourself. I don’t care about anyone at all, including myself.

So Milgram has repeatedly stated if anything happens around Mahiru that will be the end of her when it comes to Milgram,

Jackalope’s “Second Trial Commencement Notice”

"Your judgment was “guilty”, and as such, her ideas were affirmed."

Huh, hold up... I was doing a reread and I kind of copied this from the transcript without questioning it. But um why the hell does it say affirmed? Is this a translation error? Huh, but it doesn't say that for the rest of the guilty prisoners,

Prisoner No. 3: Futa Kajiyama. Your judgment was “guilty”, and as such, his ideas were rejected.

Prisoner No. 8: Amane Momose. Your judgment was “guilty”, and as such, her ideas were rejected.

Prisoner No. 9: Mikoto Kayano. Your judgment was “guilty”, and as such, his ideas were rejected.

This is directly from the transcript.

If it's not an error which it seems rather intentional given everyone else is fine then Mahiru just has this idea that she'll always be rejected that was affirmed by the verdict. Or she doesn't think what she did was wrong and we're the problem. Something that could tie into this line in I Love You,

"It’s ok for everyone else but not for me." - "Tell me, oh tell me why, won’t you just accept me?"

Sorry back on track- Milgram has made it clear that if anything happens near Mahiru that will be the end of her,

"Because she was found “guilty”, she’s lost the raison d’etre of her own existence. Her dejection is something, to be sure! Dear oh dear. Also, as you can see, she’s just battered from Kotoko’s attack. If it weren’t for Shidou’s treatments, she’d be dead for sure. Lost. If anything else happens, she’ll die, that’s a fact. What to do, is all up to you, of course."

MILGRAM / Jackalope’s “Report on the end of Second Trial”

"Prisoner No. 06: Mahiru. “Innocent”, huh? Alright, alright. Ok, so you changed your mind? Or, was it sympathy votes? When you see someone hurting a little more than expected, does it make you want to go with “innocent”? Honestly though, you’d better worry about whether she’s going to last till the Third Trial. Let’s hope nothing happens around her. I guess it’s already too late for changes. Sorry. I’m like the guy on the couch watching the sports highlights and complaining, don’t mind me."

"Let's hope nothing happens around her-"

"……don’t tell me, did this murder seem smaller to you than the murders of the other prisoners? Thought-provoking!"

Milgram has ultimately put Yuno in a very precarious position.

Where she could very well get attacked or attack someone else. To either up the ante for her third trial or omit her character entirely because her reception has been too positive. As well as find a good source of conflict that would cause stress to Mahiru and exacerbate her existing issues.

Since in the the commencement even though they highlight Mahiru's physical injuries Yuno and Jackalope both highlight her mental health as well. Saying that her dejection is really something and Yuno even commenting that she wasn't suited for Milgram.

Jackalope said she'd be lost not die.

So if she's too mentally gone due to the death or possible betrayal but it seems more leaning towards death of the prisoner closest to her there's really no telling how that will impact the song extraction next trial.

Or if they'll even be able to extract anything in regards to her crime. Especially given we've seen first hand what the mental stress did to her song extraction this round-

Plus they highlight that this trial is all about prisoner relationships near the end of the trial commencement,

"And now, as we come to the second trial, I’m guessing a new basis for judgment has introduced itself in your mind. You are also human. You can’t help but develop attachments to the individual prisoners. If you find one “innocent”, another one might be in danger. If you decide to judge one as “guilty”, it may prompt the other to go in a wholly unexpected direction. In this environment of swirling interests, profits, and losses, will you all be able to follow the metrics of your own values, and decide correctly: “innocent” or “guilty”?"

So, yeah there's all that.

[l00rem]

Sammy Lawrence character analysis

I had a small epiphany recently about Sammy’s character which just recontextualized his entire character for me and I really wanted to write it down so here’s a mini essay about our beloved musician and prophet :)

I think one of the biggest questions people often have about Sammy as a character is why he never left JDS despite the fact he seemed quite aware of how horrible it was for his mental health and that he had the talent to get a better job. My answer to this is also the main basis of this entire analysis: Sammy is a person who would rather be treated horribly then be useless.

There are many examples of this throughout the entire series. To make things easier, I’ll be going through his character in a mostly chronological order.

Before being hired

To repeat what I said earlier, people find it quite strange that Sammy didn’t leave considering his level of talent and artistic genius. But I think it’s important that we flip this around. If Sammy has so much talent, how come before being hired by Joey he was taking on jobs that he clearly didn’t really want to be doing? To quote one of his scenes at the party:

‘ The man at the piano shook his head. He seemed annoyed.(…) Sammy was not a fan of attention and definitely didn’t like putting on a show like this’

So it’s obvious that performing to audiences isn’t how Sammy wanted to be using his talent. But judging by the amount of praise Joey heaps onto him, he could’ve gotten any job he wanted right?

This is where I’m going to start heading into headcannon territory, because we don’t really know much about Sammy before working with Jack apart from the fact he once worked for the cinema.

I think it’s highly possible that Sammy suffers from the case of being really gifted , but still not good enough. He’s definitely talented, he knows this himself. But for whatever reason he was never good enough to be hired to compose for movies or anything else he seemed he’d rather be doing. Perhaps this was because of his personality putting people off? He’s quite a straightforward guy, I wouldn’t be surprised if his employers didn’t appreciate his unsolicited criticism of their works ( in other words, they can’t handle his autistic swag lmao). In fact, going off of how suspicious and distrusting he is of Joey, Its possible that he’d been tricked or scammed by his past employers. Whatever the reason, it lead to him having to settle for less and not pursue his passion the way he truly wanted to.

This is why I think he’s surprisingly so easily hired by Joey. Sammy continuously acts like he’s disinterested in Joeys offer, even though we know he’s going to be working at this place for the next 16 years of his life. I believe this is because Sammy knows JDS needs him, he is too talented for this place which makes him important. Which means he’s useful and won’t be thrown away. This makes sense when you consider the state the music department is in when Sammy demands to see it.

‘ I opened the door to the small music room. An upright piano and music stand were tightly packed inside, barley able to fit in the space. (…) This definitely did not look impressive.’

The fact that Sammy immediately begins demanding things after seeing it says a lot too. It’s as if he’s immediately pushing to see what Joey will allow, to see how badly he needs him. The more desperate Joey is to hire him, the more safe and secure this job will be for him.

And so he takes as much control as possible, demanding complete creative control over his area. The more he’s responsible for, the more he’s proving himself useful. Even if this will lead to him having waaaay too much work for one person to handle.

Working at JDS

Sammy’s 1935 tape shows us just how much he’s willing to put up with as long as it means he’s useful. He’s completely aware of how overworked he is, but ignores this in favour of ‘ keeping the little devil happy’ which most likely refers to Joey. Despite how much he complains, I think he prides himself on being able to get so much work done in such little time. Perhaps he even sees being overworked as proof that the studio just needs him that much? That he’s that significant to the success of the cartoons? Joey probably also used this tactic to manipulate Sammy, to convince him that he’s only giving him so much work because he trusts and believes in him so much.

I think Joey also figured this out from the way he talks about Sammy in Tiol. In fact it’s as if he’s actively mocking him.

‘ I wouldn’t say I was lucky to get him as part of my team, nor that I’m lucky he’s stayed with me all these years.’

‘I can’t make anyone do anything, even as a boss.’

‘ I’d never trade Sammy Lawrence for anything.’

= ‘ oh yeah he’s really talented and could totally have another job if he wanted but I actually need him and would never throw him away! He totally has the will to leave if he wants to but he stays because he knows he’s wanted here :)’

Jack’s 1943 tape does seem to confirm that the studio needs Sammy. By 1943, bendy wasn’t very relevant. Most people hadn’t really heard about the cartoons. And yet Sammy and Jack were still winning awards for their songs. In Sammy’s mind this probably solidified that the studio needs him. He doesn’t care that Joey took the credit because that’s not what matters to him. Better to know your doing good at your job then to risk upsetting your employer.

It seems he prides himself on being able to take on so much work too. In the employee handbook there’s a newspaper article on how Joey mistreats his employees and here’s what Sammy has to say about it:

‘Some people can’t take it and that’s fine’- he’s highlighting the fact that he is someone who can take it and therefore is useful to the studio. He even seems to be projecting, calling those who drop out ‘ useless’.

I think ‘ love requires sacrifice’ isn’t actually something Sammy made up to appease bendy, it’s something he lived by for most of his life. He’ll sacrifice his entire mental health if it means he’ll be loved in return. Of course, this would later take on a more darker and literal meaning.

In fact, I think there’s another factor that contributed to Sammy not being able to leave. @threadedsafteypin wrote this analysis on how Sammy may have struggled with imposter syndrome:

https://www.tumblr.com/threadedsafetypin/668068661627600896/sammy-lawrence-having-imposter-syndrome-its-more

So this gives him another reason as to why he can’t leave. If he’s working at JDs because it enables him to feel wanted and useful, then quitting because he’s struggling would be literally admitting that there’s an area in music he struggles with. In his mind he’d be proving his insecurities right, that he’s not as amazing and talented as the world thinks he is.

But Sammy had people who cared about him that would’ve been able to prove to him he’s worth more then what he can do for others right? Probably, but I think he failed to see that because of how important it is for him to feel wanted.

Let’s look at his partnership with Jack. I do believe that they truly trusted each other and remained friends during their time at JDS. However, it wouldn’t surprise me if Sammy deliberately distanced himself from Jack. Sure, Jack is one of the few people Sammy seems to actually like, but would he leave Sammy for someone better if he realised how much Sammy was faking it? I doubt it. But Sammy’s fatal flaw is his lack of trust in other people, he’s so paranoid of being worthless in the eyes of other people that he’d rather isolate himself then risk losing them. Especially someone like Jack who is directly linked to him through his talent in music.

Tragically, I think his fallout with Susie would have confirmed this paranoia for him. From his perspective, Susie doesn’t like him anymore because she no longer works for him. He isn’t her boss, isn’t there to direct her anymore and is therefore useless to her. Of course, we know this isn’t the full story. Joey intentionally orchestrated Susie’s firing so that she’d think it was Sammy’s fault. It isn’t that she stopped caring about him because she didn’t need him anymore, it’s because she thought he’d abandoned her. This outcome is very beneficial for Joey, it’ll make Sammy more desperate to seek validation from working for Joey rather then his relationships with other people. So he’ll be more reliant on Joey, no matter how much work is shoved onto him. The moment someone doesn’t need him they’ll cut ties with him, so it’s best to stay with someone who obviously needs him.

Serving the ink demon

Sammy’s devotion to bendy is the best example of how far he’s willing to go to be useful to someone. I think when Sammy accidentally drinks ink for the first time he was actually in a very desperate position. In his letter to Joey at the start of Batdr he seems uncharacteristically worried.

Considering what we’ve established, it makes sense that he’d try to help the studio not shut down. If it does, not only will he lose the place he feels secure in, but it will also show that he wasn’t good enough to keep bendy successful ( this isn’t actually the case, we know it’s all Joeys fault for his spending habits, but I think this is how Sammy would see things).

Furthermore, by the time he gets infected Susie would have been fired for a while and Jack seems very absent in DCTL ( probably because he was murdered by Joey off screen) so Sammy would be lacking what little support system he actually had. Suffice to say, he would not have been doing mentally well.

Sammy knows this company is going down hill, it’s inevitable that it’ll go bankrupt at this point. He’s losing his purpose. Enter the ink demon. A terrifying and powerful being who promises to give him a new use. Sammy says it himself in Dctl:

‘It wanted me. He wanted me.’

‘The more I felt him. Heard him. I need to please him.’

He was so desperate to not be cast aside that he was literally willing to sacrifice his coworkers in order to be of use to someone.

And then he gets sent into the ink realm at some point and the ink demon presumably stops talking to him. He’s lost his purpose but doesn’t even have the option to leave anymore. So no wonder he deludes himself Into thinking bendy will set him free. He basically has no choice, if he faces the reality of his hopeless situation will he even be able to keep going?

He convinces himself that it’s all just a test, he hasn’t been abandoned, bendy does everything for a reason. He just needs to get him to notice him again through sacrifice to remind bendy of how useful he can be.

Bendy killing Sammy was a massive reality check for him. It sends him into a complete spiral as he’s forced to confront the truth that he’s been thrown away yet again. But he still can’t fathom why he’d been ‘ left to rot’. After all, he’d kept on sacrificing people like bendy originally wanted hadn’t he? He’d remained faithful even after being ignored for years, spent years praising bendy’s name despite all possible logic pointing against it!

He has nothing. He’s worth nothing. All the suffering he endured was for nothing. We can clearly see that Sammy despises being useless more then anything else. If bendy had kept on talking to him, even if it was all lies, he would have probably have been happier then facing the truth.

Having no purpose

He may have a stupidly small amount of screen time in batdr, but I think his jail scene still tells us a lot.

I’d go as far to argue that the Sammy we see in prison is probably his lowest point in the series that we’ve ever seen.

I mean just look at him. He doesn’t even turn to look at Audrey when she enters. He’s been told that his lord is dead, that he’s a false prophet, that nothing he’s done has mattered because no one is coming to free him. If this is how Sammy acts when he feels worthless it’s no wonder that he lied to himself about bendy being his lord. He’s completely dejected of all hope.

To add to this feeling of uselessness, it doesn’t even seem like he knows how to play anymore. It sounds like he’s trying to play hellfire follis but miserably failing. Not only does he fail as a prophet, but he can’t even be a musician- the last part of his identity he could even latch onto at this point.

And honestly, as happy as an ending as Batdr seems for most of the cast, I don’t think this’ll be the same for Sammy. After all, his lord has completely left the ink realm. He has no one to serve anymore. He’ll lose all his purpose, and everyone around him tells him this is supposed to be for the better? He’s supposed to be content with remaining an ink man for the foreseeable future just because there’s no other option?

I think Sammy actually has the potential to be a villain in the next game ( assuming we get one judging from that scene at the end). Maybe someone from gent, like Alan Grey, will somehow get in contact with him and promise to give him a use again. All he has to do is go against the residents of the ink realm in order to serve him. And if Sammy’s desperate enough, I wouldn’t be surprised if he accepted.

I really do hope we see more of Sammy. I don’t think the meatly is a particularly good writer so I’m not expecting some amazing character ark but tbh I’ll take any crumbs at this point. As long as they don’t make him forgive Joeys bs ‘redemption’ ark I don’t think they can mess up his character too badly. But I’ll guess we’ll have to see when the next bendy game comes out in five years.

[destiny-in-the-universe]

Commentary & Thoughts on Recent Fixations!

so, i recently finished another series; in other words, american dragon: jake long, and i am- screeching, literally. screeching.

first of all, i’m basically watching the shows i never got to see when i was a kid, or easily could’ve forgotten about because it was years ago, and holy stars- none of the shows disappointed, but unfortunately it has led to a recent amount of ridiculous brainrot and horrible fixating that could easily be a problem lol (it already is, i can’t seem to get enough of this content)

this is the reason why the secret quartet project has become such a big thing for me, but this isn’t technically about the crossover- this is literally me using tumblr as a way to get out my thoughts and theories and headcanons for the shows because goodness gracious, why did i have to fixate on cancelled- discontinued :)- shows but okay, this one is mostly about american dragon.

on one hand, you’ve got our title lead - jake long - who, oh my stars this kid- let me reiterate by saying he is in middle school (even though he’s fourteen, so did he get held back or are schools different in nyc?) and so a lot of his dumb, stupid, and daring decisions are literally because he is a teenager. jake however, is so adhd coded it’s insane, but anyway- like. he grows so much during the series- knowing when to open up to his own mistakes, that he’s clearly protective of his own family, and so forth but i also feel like bringing up: living a double life is hard and having to protect an entire magical community is going to wear you down, and we do get to see that- jake’s a kid with a huge weight and responsibility on his shoulders and hoo boy, he gets to go through it- esp. in season two- that was an entire rollercoaster

which also brings me to my next point: the huntsclan arc could’ve gotten an entire season dedicated to it, and not to mention- there’s- the whole thing with jake and rose and i’m just. we’ll get to that later but oh my god, the whole attempting to destroy the entire magical community should’ve gotten an entire season because much like other series i got into- american dragon is very episodic, and not entirely as connected but i wish we could’ve gotten more about the huntsmaster- what his deal is exactly, and why he’s got it particularly out for the american dragon specifically, but alas it ended too short-

but it easily brings me to my next point and one that will not leave me alone no matter what i do-

first of all: the dark dragon could’ve been handled so much better. like, don’t get me wrong- it was an interesting storyline, the arc was brilliant but because of the way the final episode ended- among other things- but seriously, i wanted more in the battle between the longs and the dark dragon, i wanted to see the dark dragon’s backstory and who he was but of course, i really don’t think he would’ve come back, after the season two finale

though this- oomf, that entire episode was wonderful and i loved it but also had me screaming the entire time- it ended a little anticlimactically and a bit disappointing i’ll admit because i had certain expectations, and you could definitely see where they were trying to pave into the next season but then that never happened. the dark dragon should’ve also had its own season with expanded lore and arcs- it also ended so anticlimactically, and i was hoping to see more for the identity reveal (i had no doubts that jonathan would be accepting but holy cow- i wanted more-)

also, fair warning- this might get long because there’s so much commentary and thoughts but there will be more, both for this and the other active fixations,

Character Dynamic Commentary

Jake and Rose: these two make me want to go feral; like, oh my god- they are so star-crossed, and their dynamic was so good? but you also have the fact that rose had amnesia; she literally had her memories wiped away, and replaced no less, only to move to another country. jake seriously went through it here, though this only brings me to my next point- rose realizing that jake was the american dragon honestly tore a piece of my heart out- but then we get the freaking episode where the huntsclan got their hands on the aztec crystals bc rose was being threatened and i swear i screamed; but rose and jake are such a power couple, like they would be unstoppable if they were able to fully work together, we’ve seen it. their relationship deserved to shine

Jake and the Long Family: i don’t really know how to describe all of them, but honestly- jake is clearly very protective of them; and while yes, he has the sibling rivalry with haley- and he genuinely does want the experience of a normal teenager, there’s still a lot he’s shown to be protective of his own family. there’s episodes where, despite his complaining about his own dad, jake realizes just how much jonathan long loves him and it’s so- holy stars, it makes me want to wag my tail, the one with the straogi where jake is weakened by them, and he still jumps at the chance to protect his dad even when he can barely do anything? or when he finally releases being a cougar scout could be fun? like also, the series finale- in season two, when jake almost gave up everything to save gramps from the dark dragon- he’s fourteen and does this, like i could honestly tie it back to jake having a dragon’s possessiveness but we’ll leave that for a separate post

Jake, Spud, and Trixie: i’m going to screech about these three. i love their dynamic- and jake and spud are very neurodivergent, you cannot take this headcanon from my cold, dead hands lol. like jake is adhd and spud, this kid is autistic. you will not be able to change my mind but seriously, their friendship is so strong and sure for episode reasons, sometimes they don’t exactly get along and it was almost killing me with the knowledge that spud and trixie didn’t know about jake being a dragon- the first reveal episode had me grinning, they are the best of friends. also spud knowing coding and hacking despite seemingly being very dumb? like he’s clearly intelligent- and admitted he would fail on purpose so what more is there to him?

Jake and the Dark Dragon: i love how i’m referencing a dynamic that barely got its screentime- but also, there was so much more potential for these two. like, i would’ve loved something where the dark dragon wanted to recruit jake to join his army- mentor him, it would have been such a great way to turn jake against his grandpa, against his own family but they didn’t do it. also, genuinely would’ve just loved learning more about what the dark dragon’s deal was- we got more for the huntsclan than we did for him, and maybe if the series hadn’t been cancelled, it might’ve been seen but alas

Now moving on to the closing features because i am immensely fixated- if there was a theoretical season three, i genuinely want the new threat that jake has to face to be the government (?) - think something like the guys in white from danny phantom but where they’re trying to capture magical creatures and do worse than what professor rotwood has tried (maybe even he goes on to help jake when he realizes that this group isn’t just looking to expose them) and planning to experiment on them or something. jake could be captured, or something like that and then things get more intense but we’ll get to this later because hoo boy, oh i have so many thoughts about the would’ve-been of season threes (looking at you too, rc9gn)

anyway, this show did not disappoint- sometimes it was kind of awkward to get through but even then, even with all of that, you could see the dedication placed (but the season two design for jake as a dragon was certainly… something)

anyway, that‘s all i have for today!

~ Mod Danny

[georgianadarcies]

My advice is always to shoot your shot if you've been in love with someone for a long time because it gets to the point where it's clear you're never gonna be able to move on any other way. Like if even him having a gf didn't give you enough closure to move on then shooting your shot and getting a definitive answer might be the only way. So regardless of whether he likes you or not I would still think that's the best move. HOWEVER if he just broke up then now might not be the best timing.

Follow-up question though, can I ask why he stopped being friends with you and how/why you became friends again, cause I do think that might be relevant info to whether he might have been interested

so what happened last year happened for a couple different reasons. I don’t know for certain, I’ve only guessed that he figured out or found out that I liked him. at the time he was still with his girlfriend and we had become friends to an extent at least. I think for whatever reason that made him pull back. and it wasn’t the best way for him to handle it, but I’d also like to say that he’s matured a lot in the past year. that’s not to say that something like this couldn’t happen again but considering that and the fact that he is single now, it’s more up in the air than it might’ve been even at the beginning of this semester.

our dynamic right now is… in a weird place. he seems to be past whatever happened — he’ll talk to me and strike up a conversation when we’re around one another, and he’s been a great teammate and captain. things have gotten back to the point where he gave me a half hug (fully his prompting, I did not instigate this one bit) at a team party the other night. which doesn’t mean anything other than the fact that he’s the most comfortable with me he’s been all year.

I’ve been in love with him for the better part of two years now and it will bother me never knowing. and I know the whole “he wanted to, he would” but I never really put myself in his line of sight other than as a friend. and yeah, as our mutual friend/teammate said to me, I may not have a good chance, but he also doesn’t think it’s zero. the breakup is kinda a gray area because that relationship was over for a while and he broke up with her/it was never that serious.

what I’ve been thinking is that we’ll both be in the area over the summer and I’ll be living a five minute walk away from him. if I attempt to spend time with him and he rejects it point blank/gets weird/isn’t interested, I have an answer immediately, and if not, we can hang out. ideally there’s a few drinks and I have an excuse to flirt, and things go from there lol. and like, if he reacts poorly/shuts it down, there’s the excuse of being drunk, and I have my answer. and the same teammate really doesn’t believe that would cause many problems, he has a lot in faith that this boy will handle it well. it’s not like a master plan but I wouldn’t be careless about it anyway.

so… I have some stuff to think about. but I’ve been sitting on these feelings for so long and they haven’t gone away, I’ll always wonder if something could’ve happened. and if it doesn’t, it’ll suck, but I’ll still be hurting otherwise. and on the smallest, slightest, tiniest, 2% chance something great could come out of this… is it worth it?

I really appreciate you like listening to my stupid silly ramblings and giving an answer because, as crazy as it is, I am genuinely considering it and it’s something I should really give good thought to. the consequences scare me considering we’re teammates and will be on e-board together but everyone else seems to think that taking the risk with someone in the friend group/on the team isn’t as awful as I think it is, so. there’s that.

[stupidthingsgoodoutcomes]

With how season 3 ended I feel like Luke popping in to "visit JJ" in season 4 could definitely happen. Especially if season 4 is supposed to be JJ's season. I know lots of people want Luke to return for a redemption arc, but personally I hate when shows just redeem abusive parents because they don't know how else to resolve the characters/their relationships with their children. If Luke was to return to OBX how would like, or envision, that plot-line to go?

I wouldn’t be at ALL surprised if the Luke storyline isn’t tied up yet. They better not try to do a redemption arc for him, though, that would be the worst thing they could ever do. I don’t think they will, thankfully - they’re very mindful of how they handle abuse and I know Rudy especially has talked about how he works to make it authentic and respectful to the people who’ve gone through it. So, I’d say a redemption arc is thankfully out of the question.

Still, though - Luke hearing word that his son has money now and trying to come get some off of him? That sort of thing has basically happened in canon. I wouldn’t be surprised if he were to come back and ask for money, because he’s terrible like that and would absolutely take advantage of his son.

It’s hard to say how JJ feels eighteen months later, because so much could’ve happened. I think, though, that he’s probably still torn. He loves his dad and craves his approval even if his dad has been nothing but terrible to him. Even as his dad leaves, he’s still trying to help him - getting him food with his own money, helping him steal a boat, throwing away the drugs.

I think JJ would find it really, really hard to say no to his dad. I think what he said in season one was true - I don’t think he’s afraid of him anymore, at least not as much as he was. I do think he still wants his approval, and of course he’s still struggling with the consequences of years of abuse.

My take on it is that JJ would still feel inclined and pressured to help is dad if he came back asking for money. I do think, though, that this time Kiara would be there to help him understand he doesn’t need to give to someone who’s given him nothing. I think it would be a good moment for the character, and a good moment for Kiara and JJ’s relationship. Someone needs to remind him that he doesn’t owe his dad anything. I think he deserves to know that, and I could certainly see that happening in season four.

[skyward-floored]

Maybe I’ve missed this, and I know there were IAU chapters based on it, but how did you like Incredibles 2?

It was pretty good! I haven’t watched it in a hot minute, so I don’t remember all the little details, but it’s definitely not as good as the first one. It has a lot of things I like about it though, and I’ll gladly watch it!

I think the biggest thing for me is like, the screenslaver villain was interesting, but also I think they could’ve made it fit in a little better with things? If that makes sense? Like, the screenslaver’s whole thing is like “oooh people are obsessing over screens and technology and not living in the real world” but it doesn’t really seem to affect our heroes’ lives? None of the main characters seem to have an obsession with screens. We don’t even really see side characters being obsessed with screens, or anything like that. It just feels a little... disconnected, I guess? Idk, it’s sort of nitpicky, but it bothers me lol.

I also think it was a little odd that supers were so easily welcomed back into the public sphere? I know a lot can change in 15 or so years, but from when they first decide to change people’s views and when they sign the thing making supers legal again, it can’t have been more then a month..? I just don’t think it would happen quite that fast. But again, that’s another little nitpick.

I also think it would’ve been more fun to have the second movie be a few years later instead of a few months, see the kids a little older, have things a bit more changed. But that’s more personal opinion then a real complaint.

...But that’s enough about what I don’t like lol, it’s still a good movie! The action scenes are great and fun to watch, all of the kids’ struggles are realistic, and the dad trying and failing to handle everything is both funny and relatable. That scene of him at the table trying to figure out math was me with my mom SO much XD Also we really get to see Mrs. Incredible shine, which was fun, especially with all of those other heroes that get brought in, and the real villain ohohoho, that was a neat twist.

I think my favorite part is when all the hypnotized supers go to the Parr’s house to get the kids and Frozone comes in to help them, and Frozone ends up just barely helping them escape but gets hypnotized in the process and aaaaaaaa it’s so tense and good. I can’t wait to write it in IAU lol.

So yeah, good movie with some flaws, but nothing is perfect so yknow. I’ve been meaning to watch it again for research purposes, but I haven’t gotten a chance to yet :)

[lonelier-version-of-you]

I thought tonight’s Casualty was, overall, very good. It did feel a bit crowded with storylines, some better than others, but overall I very much liked it.

The first thing I thought after this episode was: “So Jacob is definitely getting a depression storyline, then?” I mean, it wasn’t subtle. The feelings of isolation (amplified further by Iain snapping at him, even though it was understandable), blaming himself for everything, the obsession with saving people to make up for how they couldn’t save Robyn... it has to be heading for a depression story.

If they do go there, it’s going to be very sad, but Charles Venn will play it brilliantly.

I’m very, very glad Teddy is okay! I was surprised they didn’t mention his heart condition, though, I would’ve thought that would be another thing for the paramedics to worry about. Anyway, Milo Clarke was great tonight. As was Di Botcher - the scenes with Jan worrying about Teddy were heartbreaking. Normally the “these people have an argument before something happens to one of them, leading the other one to regret what they said” thing feels quite cliched, but I thought they did it very well in this episode.

I didn’t enjoy the Krish storyline itself so much, but then, I suppose a sad story like this isn’t the sort of thing one can ‘enjoy’. They did do very well at creating a tense atmosphere for those scenes, though. Some great writing/directing/acting there.

A lot of great scenes came from the Teddy story. The moment between Jan and Sah, Sah visiting Teddy in his hospital bed, etc. I loved all of those.

The Jan and Gethin storyline is very interesting, even though it’s sad. Their scenes together are fantastic, and brilliantly acted by Di Botcher and Robert Pugh. I wonder where this SL will go next?

I loved the story with Louis and Lilly. When I saw they were bringing Louis back (after we first saw him a few months ago), I didn’t know what they were going to do - and I still don’t get why they brought him back, I don’t care either way but this could’ve been any pair of patients, it’s not like Louis knowing Jan already was a big aspect of the story. But it was very good! I love the disability representation on this show so much. And the actress for Lilly, Bethany Asher, was great in the role.

I wonder if they’ll bring in Rida’s relative that she mentioned. I did think “oh no”, but then I remembered this is Casualty, and it’s Holby where characters got disabled relatives who were depicted as “burdens” to them (Jason for Serena, Lizzie for Madge, etc.). Casualty would handle this perfectly well. I’m just still bitter from Holby.

Also, more people should be as nice and caring as Rash. The scene where he apologised to Lilly was lovely.

I don’t know what happened in the Faith scenes and I don’t care. Well, I did get that Faith told Natalia she’s dating Iain. Meh. Natalia’s coat was nice, by the way, I’d love to have that coat.

The Donna and Dylan friends/not friends/friends arc continues. We didn’t get much Donna this week (presumably they’re trying to gently settle her in before she gets bigger stories), but I loved what we did get. Same for Dylan. Him saying he’d give her lifts to the hospital until she got her car back was so cute.

I don’t care whether this goes in the friendship direction or the romance one, I love it. And I love how when one of Dylan’s nurse friends leaves, they seem to get him another one straight away. David was introduced soon after Lofty left, and now David’s left too, they’re pairing him with Donna. It’s great.

[dragonmasterhiccup]

Spitelout avoided the Chiefs questions, instead choosing to continue firing angry shots. “Her build means nothing! Some of Berks best warriors are leaner than normal!” He gestured at Astrid. “Size isn’t an excuse!” It did when it was Hiccup, though. “For as long as she’s been here, she should be able to properly fight off any enemies!”

He glared at Valka. “Aye, but at least you tried. She, clearly did not!”

Danny’s leg shook as Hiccup went into detail, he shouldn’t have had to see that.

At Hiccup’s nod of encouragement, Danny tried to relax, she really did, but it didn’t work, not with Spitelout still looming over and spilling his nonsense.

She just nodded at Astrid, before turning her gaze back to the table.

Oh Gods, Hiccup had actually killed him? She knew that he said that Grimmel wouldn’t ever bother her again, but she didn’t think he actually killed him! It only took a moment for that shock to wear off though, she knew Hiccup would’ve done that if it came down to it, which it did.

Danny looked over at Fishlegs, letting out a shaky sigh of relief before giving him a small smile.

Snotlout, who had said nothing the entire time, had been startled when Hiccup asked for his input.

He looked between Danielle and his father, not sure as to how he was supposed to handle this.

There was always this expectation for the Jorgensons, especially him, since his father pushed it so hard on him from the very start.

If he disagreed with his father, then he wouldn’t live up to said expectation, and he also couldn’t even fathom what he might say to him…

But what was the right thing to do?

Sure, he wasn’t really fond of Danielle, she was an annoying teenager, and he was positive that he was twice the person at half her age, but she was… innocent. She was innocent.

“I…” His voice rarely ever faltered, so why was it now?

He caught another glimpse of her; her eyes looking at him, pleading with him to not agree with his father.

He made a decision.

Clearing his throat, he slapped his firm, almost determined look back onto his face, and nodded at Hiccup, making sure that his father wasn’t even in his view.

“I’m with Fishlegs, she’s innocent, everything that happened was because of Grimmel, not her.”

Danielle looked back at him with nothing but gratitude, mouthing a very small ‘thank you’ that he chose to ignore.

“WHAT?!” Spitelout yelled.

That yell probably could’ve put a Thunderdrum to shame.

The older Viking roughly grabbed his son by the shoulder, spinning him around to face him.

“You’re going to betray your own father?! All for the sake of this, this outcast?! I raised you better than this— You’re a Jorgenson for Gods sake! And we Jorgensons don’t pity people just because they look sorry!”

“Dad, stop! She, she’s innocent! And I know you know that! Why would Fishlegs and Hiccup lie about this?! Hiccup was literally there, he saw it! And Fishlegs knows a lot about this stuff, definitely more than you do!”

"She was in combat training, and she'll resume once Gothi says she is well enough to do so." Astrid stated firmly. She too, was glaring at Spitelout, and the daggers she shot his way didn't waver.

Fishlegs returned Danny's small smile before shifting his focus back to Snotlout, curious as to what he'd say.

As Hiccup waited for Snotlout to speak, to say he was nervous was an understatement. He knew he was putting his friend in a tough position, but Hiccup felt that Snotlout's words could help tip the scales.

His expression was also one of gratitude after hearing Snotlout's decision, though it quickly turned to frustration at Spitelout's outburst.

Hiccup moved from his place towards Snotlout and Spitelout, placing a hand on his cousin's shoulder. "Before we take this to an official vote, I did invite Gothi over to share her thoughts as well, based on the condition Danny returned to Berk in. She was able to see more of the affect it had."

Looking over at the elder Berkian, he gestured for her to come forward. "Once she's said her piece, there will be one more opportunity to share any thoughts before we vote."

He made his way back to his seat, looking over at Danny. He gave her a look that said, 'We're almost there, just hang on'.

Sitting back down next to Astrid, he nodded, ready to translate for Gothi.

[gl00mie]

06/17/24 1:37PM

Time flies. I’ve just been reading back on all my old posts now that I redid my Tumblr theme and it’s wild to think that once upon a time I was in here ranting as much as I did.

The funniest part is that I took turns on different platforms. If I wasn’t on here, I was on Instagram. If I wasn’t online, I was in my phone notes. If I wasn’t there, I was in my journals. Always writing. Always expressing my emotions.

There’s so much feeling behind every one of those entries regardless of where they were posted and it feels crazy to read them and experience them and get transported back to that time.

I’ve grown so much! Like literally so much since those days. I’ve got a better grip on a lot of things and I’m really proud of myself for that. Back then I didn’t even think I was going to make it out of it, look at me now, that’s wild.

That’s not to say I don’t have my days where I’m going through it but it’s definitely not as consistent or as intense as it used to be. I have more neutral times in between the ups and downs. It feels less manic-y, more natural. Now it’s more like a gentle back and forth. A gentle rocking between optimism and pessimism — a much more manageable range of emotions compared to the ones I’d experience before. I can confront it a lot better when it happens now. I’m more aware of my feelings changing but I don’t let myself spiral- I distract myself or have self talks or ignore it until it passes.

My experience was far more extreme in the past. I’d either be hopeful, or disappointed in this world. No real in between here. Back then the concept of suicide was more intertwined with these emotions. “Hopeful” me would feel euphoria whenever I felt I didn’t want to die. I would feel like a new leaf had turned and I was ready to “enjoy” life. I would have more energy, I would write a lot about my realizations, I would plan things out for my future, make time for friends, pick up hobbies.

But then 2-3 days later, it would fade away, and “disappointed” me would enter and so would the desire to want to die and it would weigh down on me like a ton of bricks. I wouldn’t eat, wouldn’t get out of bed, I’d have no energy for the new hobbies, for texting, for anything.

Then something would happen and I felt better again! A cycle, hence why it’s felt a bit manic-y before. That was hard to experience but now that I’ve experienced it, I’ve definitely grown better at adapting and I’m so grateful.

I will say I did have a long history of drinking from 2019-now that could’ve helped numb out a lot of the things I was going through. Drinking every day or every other day didn’t really give me time to dwell on things and I feel like that sort of helped (I’m not supporting alcoholism) . It also blurred all the days together, and I always felt happier while tipsy. The next morning though? Total depression. Don’t recommend.

But in general my perspectives have also changed and I think that’s also contributed to my growth and I’m proud of myself for working so hard to figure it out- now I’m in a place where it is a bit easier for me. I still deal with anxious(ocd) thoughts but those I just handle as they come, with more grace as well because I’ve already made it this far.

Anyways, yay to me for 10+ years on Tumblr.

[stuckonvenus]

In 2024, Rolling Stone released four consecutive issues detailing the lives of the members of the world’s biggest music phenomenon seen since the 1970s...

              INTERVIEW WITH RIDLEY ALBRIGHT — 1/13/24

What is the most difficult thing about being a musician?

Probably the fame [chuckles]. I like to think I can handle my fair share of bullshit, but people really show you who they are when you’ve put yourself on a pedestal. But I don’t mind it that much, I used to be really into debate, so I know how to navigate the attention better than others I’ve seen.

Which song from your current album is your personal favorite and why?

“Videodrome”. And not just because of the solo I get. I think we really came out of our shells brainstorming ideas for it and even though it wasn’t the single we picked for radio stations or anything, I’m still proud of how well it does live.

How do you manage to maintain musical integrity while being commercially successful?

Remembering where you came from. Life wasn’t, uh, always like this, and it’s important to remember that it can be taken from you just as quickly as it was given. Kind of a cliché, but if I didn’t think about my scrawny college-aged self fighting just to make it through the day, I’d get in way over my head and it would drag everyone else down with me.

How do you deal with creative blocks or performance anxiety?

My sister helps me the most when it comes to anxiety. She has her own issues, but she always makes time for me when I most need it. I don’t really know where I’d be without her. When it comes to creative blocks, I mostly smoke a joint and see how far that gets me, and if I’m at a stand still, I just give myself the time I need to actually think and not force anything out.

How would you describe your style of music?

Um... Probably, like, post-grunge, alternative rock. We’ve still got fragments of grunge here and there in our sound, but for the most part we’ve evolved from just being tethered to one genre of music. I’d even go as far to say that we’ve dipped into hardcore with songs like “Light Me Up”, which was a lot more popular than any of us were expecting whenever it first came out. It shot to the top of the charts almost immediately.

Are any of your songs based on real events or people we might know? If so, can you tell us more about them without giving away too many details about the song itself?

[laughs] Definitely not anyone the outside world would know, but that might change with our next album, definitely. Everything on “Technicolor” is mostly based off of figures and experiences from our youth that, as musicians, we’re morally obligated to hold a grudge against in order to make a good album, and with that an even better story that’s tied into it.

                       INTERVIEW WITH EL MERCER — 2/15/24

Isn’t it true that with songs like “August Honey” and “Snuff 102” you really re-discovered Tom Petty and Heart for the younger generation that’d never heard them before?

Yeah. We really all channeled what we listened to when we were kids, or, well, what our parents would listen to and we’d be subjects of, y’know. Stuff that we thought deserved to be brought back to the mainstream.

At that time did you think you were going to be a writer and get into all your own things as you have?

I always had a certain fixation toward writing, but I don’t think I could’ve predicted all of this. Dreamed about it, sure. But knowing for sure where I’d end up? Hell no.

Your change in style came about when you thought enough people had been turned on to grunge?

I think our change came about the same time a lot of the grunge resurgence started. When there were no hit groups. We were grunge purists who liked ever so commercial things but never did them on stage because we were so horrible and so aware of being grunge purists, y’know what I mean? We used to be so surprised to hear other people do the same things we were doing. The thing is that the public didn’t know about any of this music because the record companies were issuing hundreds of singles a week so naturally most people missed a huge lot of them.

What were the first things you wrote?

The first thing was “REDROOM.” Well, that wasn’t the first thing we wrote but it was one of the first things we recorded that we had written. Also, “Things We Do in the Dark,” “August Honey,” which was a hit here. We were writing ballads, essentially.

Is there a central figure in your writing, someone you’re writing to or about in particular, or does it shift with each song?

I feel like I write everything for my younger self, first and foremost. Shit that kid would’ve listened to and thought, damn, this is sick. I tend to write more ballads for my dad, who died when I was sixteen-ish, because he loved that sort of stuff. He was big into David Bowie — who wrote some of the best ballads known to man, like “Wild is the Wind” and “Heroes”.

Do you prefer songs with a subtle or obvious message?

I’d say subtle. Sometimes I get carried away with flowery language that Gabe, our drummer, has to be like... Dude, no one knows what you’re talking about. Are you high right now? [laughs]. But that doesn’t mean some songs aren’t more straightforward than others. Like, “Antenora” is probably the most layered song I’ve written, and I think everyone gets the gist of “Apocalypse”, so, it varies.

   MANON ALBRIGHT AND GABE LAHEY INTERVIEWS COMING SOON...

[carrdfan]

Eddie Brock/Venom x Reader

summary : Eddie grows worried due to your absence and is soon convinced by Venom to go out and check on you. Yet when he finds you and countless others bruised and hurt, there's only one suspect; and Eddie suddenly has an urge to end them.

main tags : imagine , comfort , female reader

warnings : blood mention

Eddie walked around the messy living room as the kitchen clock ticked by each passing second. Every minute that passed, he grew more and more worried about your well-being. You were only heading to the pharmacy, so why had you been gone for so long?

"Eddie." Venom suddenly called, interrupting the silence. "We should check on her."

Part of Eddie immediately agreed and wanted to leave right away, yet another part of him said that it was just his paranoia causing him to stress this much.

"I'm probably just overthinkin'," He told Venom as he continued to wander around the living room, starting to pop his knuckles as some sort of relief. "She can definitely handle herself anyways-"

"No.. I sense something unsettling from afar, she's in danger Eddie." Eddie wanted to tell Venom that he was just getting paranoid too, but from the tone of voice, he was calling it.

Eddie really didn't want to acknowledge the possibility of you being hurt, and dare God bring up the idea of death occurring to you. "Fine! Fine, let's go," Eddie said as he quickly grabbed his keys before heading out the door. He hoped both him and Venom was just exaggerating in the end.

He ran out of the apartment and into the car. The drive to the pharmacy wasn’t too far, yet within a few minutes, Eddie could sense something wasn't right either. The smell of smoke slowly filled the air, causing Eddie to panic. "Shit!" He quickly said under his breath.

Eddie soon drove up to see police cars and fire trucks circled around a part of the street. They were destroyed, buildings damaged and on fire; one being the pharmacy you ran to. Eddie felt a pit in his stomach at the sight of the event while he quickly parked and got out of the car. He greatly stressed over his biggest priority: you.

Eddie tried to take a closer look, but was stopped by officers who refused access towards everyone. There was a moment of him and the officer going back and forth as Eddie hardly kept a hold of himself, fortunately, there was a cry in the distance to distract him. "Hey!" Both turned to see you afar and slowly walking towards them. Once you caught up to both men, you quickly told the officer that Eddie was here for you before pulling Eddie aside to catch him up on what went down.

You both stood on the sidewalk as there was a moment of silence. Just being by each other was enough to calm both of you down, because while Eddie was calming himself from fear, you were still processing some bits of what just went down. You tried to say something to break the silence, but Eddie carefully placed his hands on your face. While his intention was to get a closer look to what happened to you, but he also managed to help you catch a few more breathers and collect more of yourself. 

Once he finally got a look up close though, he was hugely pissed. You were covered in small scars along with a few bandages wrapped around your arms and legs. You seemed to have taken a bit of the hit but luckily didn't get the worse of it compared to the few other victims Eddie saw. "Oh my God, Y/n. What- what happened?"

You tried to recall everything that went down even though it was a lot to take. "So.. Uh, someone decided to go rapid and attack the street," you turned around to point out the order of the events, "Some pieces from buildings were thrown and one of them almost flew on top of the pharmacy. Some believe it was some kind of explosion that cause it, while others think it was something else."

You continued to explain the rest of your story and even some of the other victims, how some witnessed pieces almost be thrown directly at them, while others had the unfortunate sight of seeing bodies be split in half or have their heads crushed in. But it was clear no one was able to get a sight of the one behind this, those who did must have been the ones killed. Eddie felt a lot of emotions come over him but the two who majorly left was anger and guilt.

Anger from the fact someone dared to cause havoc in the town. Someone dared to put your life in extreme danger. While you managed to play it off, the fact someone went far enough to cause you to have blood running down your face enraged him.

Yet he felt guilty, guilty that the harm to came your way was his fault. He should've been there for you when times called, yet he wasn't. And that's what weighed him down.

Eddie soon took a grip to both of your arms, "Y/n. Are you sure no one knows who’s behind this. No one got even a glimpse?" It was a rare sight to see Eddie so visually frustrated so you were caught by surprise. But there was no need for you to answer as Eddie took it back shortly, the pieces were already clicking together for him by the passing second. The choices already dialed down to one person, and that person made Eddie furious.

It’s uncommon for them to make a move just to retreat; they didn’t just attacked the street on pure decision. They might have known you were making an errand and proceeded to attack on that info.

This whole incident could’ve been nothing more but a major way to fuck with Eddie. And fueled him with enough rage to punch a hole in the wall, only to hold himself back was you as he wanted to show some decency.

Trying his best to keep his anger in, he let go of his grip on you and took a moment. "..Come on. Let's get you home first. I have something to handle myself and I’d prefer you be home while I’m gone." Fully agreeing, you inform the authorities of your sudden leave before you and Eddie got in his car and drove home.

In the small ride back, you couldn’t help but notice the irritation Eddie was keeping a hold of. His grip seemed a bit too tight on the steering wheel, and his breathing seem a bit too unkept. But you didn’t push yourself to ask him anything about it. 

Once you both made it home, you walked into the apartment before turning back and looking at Eddie. “Are you sure you wanna leave after what happened? It may not be safe for tonight.” Logically speaking, Eddie should be staying close with you as you would do with him if he was in your spot, but to see Eddie go run this errand made you question a few things.

Eddie couldn’t help but smile as he slowly walked up to you, "I’ll be fine, it’s better if I run and handle it now then wait till later." He soon gave you a small kiss on your forehead before stepping back and heading off, "I'll be back, and don’t leave the house for the rest of the night." Before you could respond and interrogate Eddie some more, he was already getting in the car and backing up. You decided to listen and head to your given room, yet wondering why Eddie sounded so confident in what he was doing. Maybe later on you can ask him about this incident again.

Either way, you cared for yourself and attend to your scars, time slowly went on and on until, ironically, you found yourself in Eddie’s spot for a moment or two. But with the affects of the attack, you couldn’t help but given into your sleepiness and decided dosed off to bed.

While you got some sleep, Eddie was out catching some Carnage to end this memorable night.

[genshin-obsessed]

You Get Injured!

Yo! I’m back and this time with a little bit of angst. One thing about me: I ADORE ANGST!!! LEMME BREAK SOMEONE’S HEART!!! I love, love, love writing angst so much! Anyway, enjoy!

Summary:  You get injured on the job, what’s his reaction?

Includes: Aether, Kaeya, Diluc, Venti, Razor, Xiao, Xingqiu, Zhongli, and Childe! (YES I ADDED AETHER >:0)

Come one, come all! See what happens when you come home injured!

Warnings: Mentions of blood, no details though.

You were supposed to be with Aether, but he had his own commissions, but he swore he’d come help you right after. You weren’t patient and ended up getting into a fight with too many hilichurls and it didn’t end well.

He immediately remembered the time he lost Lumine, but for some reason, he was even more scared than that incident. He felt as if the wind had been knocked out of him and he’d completely frozen up. When he saw your bloodied form fall to the floor, it brought him back to reality.

He ran to you and pulled you into his arms, desperately searching for life. He needed to see that you were ok. In fact, he’d taken your hand and squeezed your wrist to feel your pulse. It was weak, but it was there. He pressed his lips to yours, ignoring the taste of iron that followed.

As the doctor was stitching up the larger gashes, he was cleaning up the blood around your face and whispering words of encouragement to you. He gave you water and held your hand throughout the entire process.

PERSONAL NURSE AETHER REPORTING FOR DUTY! Beck and call, whenever you need him, he’s there for you. He put his adventuring on hold until you were 100% better.

Did you need an adventuring partner? Cuz Aether needs one! And you’re the perfect candidate. He’s going on adventures will you- well ok, he’s going EVERYWHERE with you but for a while. Once his nerves and anxiety dies down, he backs off quite a bit.

You had been fighting hilichurs for a commission and the last thing you had expected was multiple Mitachurls to be around. Well, there were more than you could handle and they floored you.

His heart almost stopped when he saw your bloodied form walking towards him, reaching out ever so weakly. He sprinted towards you, hating that he wasn’t there for you. Why was he so slow?! Why were so you far away, dammit?

He takes you into his arms and holds you close before quickly rushing you to the doctor. He knew he might’ve been a bit rough, but he could barely think. All that was going through his mind was him wishing that it was all just a nightmare.

He’s there 24/7, whenever you need him. He’s got meals, blankets, cuddles, kisses, whatever you need. He helps you with EVERYTHING. He knew it was hard to shower with all those wounds and he didn’t want your stitches to open up, so he was a bit strict.

After your full recovery, he’s a little bit hesitant to let you go on your own. He might just join you on a mission or two. Don’t mind him, but once his worries are eased a little, he backs off. Besides, the cavalry captain can’t exactly run around with you, even though he so desperately wants to.

You were on your way to Mondstat from Liyue where you ended up on a beach with more ruin guards than you could handle (may the lord protect you if you wander there on accident).

Full fledged panic. It almost feels like someone was actively tearing his heart out. He couldn’t even breathe in that moment. He desperately wished he could heal you (I don’t think he can…), make you all better so you wouldn’t have to hurt so much. Were… were you crying?

He ran to you but the second he reached out to touch you, he pulled back a little. He was almost scared to touch you, like something as gentle as his touch might shatter what remained. He didn’t want to hurt you anymore, but it was clear you couldn’t walk so he had to carry you.

He does hold you close when you get help, whispering words of encouragement and love to you; anything to help. He immediately helped clean the blood off of you, trying to be as gentle as possible.

Through your healing process, he’s beside you constantly. He helps you with everything. Anything you need, he’s there. Thirsty? He’s got some water. Hungry? He’s got a plate of food. Need cuddles? Scoot over.

He’s actually terrified to let you go, but he knows you. This is your job and he’d seen you in action. So, he does let you go… as long as he can stick to you like glue (Cries in no Venti).

You had been hunting some abyss mages down and everything was going great… until it wasn’t. A rookie mistake almost caused your death. You’d never been so scared and the only thing you could think of was Diluc in that moment. You wanted to be in his arms.

He thought he’d been caught in a nightmare. He genuinely believed it wasn’t you. But when you called out to him, he was yanked back to reality. Everything felt so weird, it felt like a weird out of body experience for him. He was so scared he was shaking as he reached out to touch your bloodied face.

The first thing he does is check you to see how bad your injuries are before he brings you home to his personal doctor. Your blood burned him, it stung as tears welled up in his eyes. How could he let this happen to you? How could he fail you like this?

As the doctor patches you up, he sits beside you, holding your hand and giving you kisses every now and then, telling you you’re doing great and that you’ll be ok. He was still shaking, but he didn’t want you to worry, so he did his best to hide it. 

He’s extremely busy, so he can’t be beside you 24/7, but he tries to be with you every single night. In fact, he lets the knights handle everything while you heal, not wanting to leave you alone for too long

You best believe he’s hunting down every single abyss mage in existence. One hurt you? They all suffer. You try to keep him in check by keeping him at your side.

You had decided to challenge Electro Hypostases on your own... You should’ve been more careful. You didn’t realize how powerful it was and you got extremely lucky. 

Oh he can smell your blood from a distance. So he didn’t even need to see you to know you were injured. He was terrified. His heart was beating so fast and he couldn’t catch his breath. He felt himself going insane when he couldn’t find you.

Well wolves lick their wounds, but he couldn’t lick yours. One, it wouldn’t work, your wounds were too deep, two, he was a human, not a wolf. He knew your friends could help you so he rushed you back to Mondstat (I’m sure this is probably wrong, feel free to roast me).

Although he knew the doctors were just trying to help, he couldn’t stop himself from being aggressive. He even growled at a doctor when you whimpered as you received the stitches. Kaeya and Jean had to hold him back.

No one is allowed near you until you’re fully healed, Razor doesn’t let anyone get close. It’s not just him being super possessive, he was deeply terrified that in case someone attacked you while he wasn’t there…

Your new adventure partner is Razor. Even if he has to live in Mondstat with the other humans, he’ll do it. As long as you’re with him. Don’t bother trying to argue, it won’t work.

You had a teeny weeny competition with Xiangling that you two could find the best ingredients first. You got careless, wandered into a hilichurl camp, only to get floored by 4 mitachurls.

Who hurt you?! Who hurt you and where are they? Xiao just wants to talk. 

Thankfully, the boss of the inn was able to find some help for you and helped patch you up, while Xiao waited patiently. On the outside he looked calm, on the inside- well it was chaos. Nothing could calm his anger and anxiety.

He reassured you that you did a great job, letting you know that he was proud of you. Not to mention, he kept thanking you for coming back alive so that he could save you. He didn’t even want to think about what could’ve happened if you weren’t able to come back… 

He kept you close. As you healed, he was almost like a personal nurse. He brought you whatever you wanted and lots of almond tofu. If you don’t like it… well more for him.

He was very reluctant to let you go. He couldn’t go with you and it was his biggest regret. But he knew holding you back would do nothing, therefore he poured all his faith and trust in you. So please... come back to him.

You had gone to visit Chang the Ninth and on the way back had seen a village get attacked by some abyss mages. You jumped into action without thinking… at all.

Xingqiu actually hadn’t looked up from his book because he was so invested. You called after him, collapsing nearby but he wasn’t even paying attention. Finally, he heard you scream and jumped, his heart leaping out of his chest. He still won’t forgive himself… or pick up a book.

He immediately takes you back home, carefully carrying you so that he wouldn’t agitate your injuries anymore than they already were.

He stayed by your side and even helped patch you up, wanting to do as much as he could to help. He even kissed your injuries to help them heal faster.

He stays by your side as much as possible. You suggest he read you some books, but it seems like he’s too scared to touch any. Something that might need time to recover from.

Xingqiu’s still too busy to join you, but whenever he can, he definitely does. He is a little too protective in the beginning but as time goes on, he finds himself being able to hold back.

You just needed some chaos devices, just a few. YOU DIDN’T EXPECT TO GET YOUR ASS HANDED TO YOU SO BADLY!

He couldn’t believe it. His heart had almost stopped when he saw you walking towards him. You were covered in blood and you weakly reached out before you fell. He dashed forward and caught you before you hit the ground.

He takes you to his place, getting a doctor to immediately patch you up. As they were cleaning your wounds, he tried to stay calm, yet had this overwhelming urge to destroy whatever hurt you into a million pieces.

He stayed with you, nursing you back to health. Of course, constantly forgetting mora was a thing when buying you literally anything. This will never change.

He wasn’t able to understand why he couldn’t physically let you go in the beginning. Slowly, it made sense that he was scared. Scared he might lose you and that you might never come back. Scared you might disappear like you almost did. But you were… well you. So he had to trust you. Come back home to him safely.

You had just finished up your commissions and were head home when you stumbled upon an Oceanid. You needed a cleansing heart… or four. You weren’t prepared and you were a little tired, but you went anyway. You were lucky you came back alive.

Childe had set up a cute little date for you two, but you were running a little bit late. He was starting to get worried and when he asked Katheryne, he was surprised to learn that you hadn’t returned home from your commissions. Then he saw you. Leaving a trail of blood and limping towards him. He felt as if someone had done all that to him instead.

He immediately runs to you, with Katheryne following. The two of them quickly get you some medical attention, but Childe refuses to let go the entire time. No matter what anyone says, they can’t take you away, so he goes with you everywhere.

You explain what had happened afterwards and he was angry that you’d put yourself in danger for a stupid item. But at the same time, he was proud of you for beating the Oceanid and coming back to him, regardless of what shape you were in. You still got an earful though.

He wanted to be around you 24/7, but he’s really busy. He tries to get away from work as much as he can to spend time with you. Throughout your healing process, he does a lot to help. Simple things like making you meals, the ones that melt your heart. 

He was reluctant, constantly checking up on you and even wanting to go on adventures with you. But he couldn’t spend every minute with you, so he needed to learn how to ease his own anxieties. Of course, you would never say no to going on a few adventures with him.