#I could ramble about this story for hours

[introspectiveextrovertive-blog]

Part 5 - Azzi's Turn

I be havin fun wit it fr. kinda corny what whatevr!!!! I am the corniest. Trying to tell a biblically accurate Pazzi story so pardon my reach

Fall/Winter – 2021

On the tenth morning of November, Azzi was out for a run in Storrs. She told herself it was just a light jog, and she could use it as an opportunity to appreciate the last of the fall foliage in Connecticut before winter truly arrived. In truth, winter was already here, and Azzi felt it through the chill her long sleeve couldn’t protect her from.

Her birthday was tomorrow, something she felt indifferent about. All she could focus on was how busy her day would be – she had morning lift, her economics exam at 10am, followed by one of her first in-season games with the Huskies, which she could potentially be star–

As her right foot made contact with the ground, she slipped on a wet leaf on the sidewalk, almost falling before catching herself. She paused with her hands on her hips, breathing heavy. For whatever reason, almost falling had her heart racing – a pent-up fear bubbled up from the pit of her stomach. It reminded her that she was fragile, breakable; like when she tore her ACL a few years ago.

She paced forward until she found a bench to sit on, still breathing heavy. Her hands landed on her knees, and she closed her eyes, trying to recoup herself.

She was far away from campus now, and too anxious to run back. Walking would probably take thirty minutes to an hour. She groaned to herself.

In that moment, her phone buzzed: a call from Paige. Azzi felt her heart rate go down.

“Azzi, yo, I’m so bored. Do you want –” Paige rambled immediately, promptly being cut off by Azzi.

“Can you pick me up?” She said, sounding a little breathless, “I’m by that Joshua Preserve.”

A pause.

“Are you good? How did you end up there? I’m on my way. It’s also freezing, What the f –”

Azzi cut her off again, laughing slightly, “I’m fine, I just ran out here and don’t want to run back.”

“You did this…willingly?”

“Shut up.”

Seven minutes later, Paige pulled up to the Joshua Trust Preserve entrance and Azzi happily hopped into the passenger seat. Paige threw on her seat warmers, Azzi’s to the highest setting.

“Hey,” Azzi said nonchalantly, “Thanks for picking me up so fast. Did you run through every red light to get here or something?”

Paige rolled her eyes, pulling out of the lot and onto the road. “Something like that.” She peered over at her friend, taking in her chattering teeth and goosebump-covered skin. She clicked her tongue on the roof of her mouth and blindly reached in her backseat.

Azzi watched as she did so, taking in Paige’s shoulders and long arms. Had she gotten…broader? She was so transfixed by Paige’s upper body she didn’t realize Paige had chucked her extra hoodie and sweatpants in her face until she was sputtering, annoyed.

“Dude,” Azzi grumbled, “Thanks.”

“Who wears just a long sleeve while running in November in Connecticut,” Paige asks rhetorically in a flat tone. “Actually, let’s back up. Who even enjoys running?”

Azzi, now very warm and comfortable thanks to Paige’s clothes, crossed her arms. “Lots of people,” she says matter-of-factly, “I felt fine while I was running.”

Paige looked over at her with a disbelieving expression, eyes zoning in on the red of her nose and its dusting on her cheeks from the chill outside. Pretty, she thought involuntarily. She scrunched her face in surprise at the thought and blinked, focusing back on the road.

“Why’d you stop?”

“Hm?” Azzi hummed, distracted as she stared at the trees flying by.

“Why did you stop running?”

Azzi paused for two seconds too long. “I was just tired.”

“No, you weren’t.”

“How would you know?”

“Because I know you, and you weren’t.”

“Well, I was, so leave me alone.”

Paige looked at her again then, brows drawn. Azzi’s tone was too defensive for her to ignore. She reached out and casually rubbed Azzi’s trap muscle, it feeling as tense as she looked.

“Tell me,” Paige said softly.

Azzi let a breath out through her nose, closing her eyes at Paige’s ministration near her shoulder. “It’s stupid.”

“Tell me, even if you think it’s stupid.”

Azzi shifted, feeling uncomfortable with speaking on her vulnerability. But Paige was Paige, and she knew she wouldn’t judge her, and that she also wouldn’t stop until they talked about it.

“Back at the preserve, I was running over a wet patch, and I slipped,” Azzi said slowly, “It wasn’t anything, like I didn’t fall. It just freaked me out. It was like, what if I did fall and hurt myself? I just couldn’t run after that.” She didn’t have to say the word ACL for Paige to understand what she wasn’t saying out loud.

They were pulled into Paige’s apartment parking lot now. Shifting her car in park, Paige felt her heart drop at her friend’s muted distress. She looked over at Azzi, who was staring ahead, unmoving. She looked pensive and slightly closed off, and it made Paige want to give her hand a squeeze. So, she did.

Azzi looked down at Paige’s hand on top of her own in her lap. She stared at Paige’s thumb that grazed her knuckles.

“I –” Paige’s voice came out scratchy. She cleared her throat and continued. “I pray for you often, Az.”

Azzi, shocked, stared at Paige. She waited for Paige to elaborate, her mouth slightly agape as she seemingly couldn’t speak herself.

“After your injury, I wished for any strength to find you, and often. I wished for your health and for God to show you grace,” Paige paused, wanting to word her thoughts well, “I just am saying this because I think you should give yourself the same grace, Az. It was really hard what you went through, and it’s okay to not want it to happen again. Don’t let it scare you from life.”

Azzi digested her words, looking to Paige like she might cry. Paige’s heart skipped, worried she said the wrong thing. But Azzi lifted her hands to her chest on top of Paige’s hoodie she wore, and she sounded so small saying, “That was one of the nicest things you’ve ever said to me, Paige.”

Paige’s ears turned pink, and she stared at the dashboard, stuffing her hands in her hoodie pocket. “Yeah, well, I meant it.” She cleared her throat again.

Azzi smiled down at her lap for a moment, then looked over at her clearly embarrassed friend, enjoying the pink she spotted on her cheeks.

“Do you want to play Smurfs?”

Paige exhaled, muttering low, “Obviously.”  

___________________________

Paige hadn’t meant to stay up until the minute it was officially Azzi’s birthday, but there she was, watching as her alarm clock turned to 12:00am. She held her iPad loosely, rubbing the indent of the PMB monogram Azzi had gotten on the case when she gave it to her last month.

In truth, she wanted to call Azzi, but there was no way she was awake. Selfishly, she wanted to be the first to get her to laugh today, and to get her day started right. She opted for a voice message instead.

“Hey Azzi,” Paige said quietly into her phone speaker. “I’d call you, but I know you’re asleep. Pretty lame of you.” She paused, her brain freezing on what to say. She was beginning to feel emotional, thinking of all that Azzi meant to her, and how she could articulate it. She looked down at the phone, deleting the voice note she’d started.

She sat alone with herself in the quiet of her room, the only sounds being a car from the nearby road every so often. The drip of a drain outside her window.

“So stupid,” she whispered to herself, “Just talk.”

She cleared her throat.

“Hi lil’ Azzi,” she said with a cringe, feeling sick. Hi lil’ Azzi? She wanted to die.

She scrapped the note.

She sighed, trying again.

“Hey Az,” her voice coming out lower than she meant, “I’d call you, but I know the princess needs her beauty rest.” She smiled to herself. “I wanted to be the first to wish you happy birthday, 'cause you know, I’m your best friend and all.”

She paused, the quiet beginning to make her feel bolder.

“I’m so happy you actually listened to me and came to UConn, ‘cause I don’t think I’d be who I am without you. I mean as a player, and even a person sometimes. Like I genuinely think I am so cool for knowing you,” She stopped, rolling her eyes. “You’re going to get the biggest head listening to this, but it's fine. I really mean it. And shoutout Tim and Katie Fudd for giving me my best friend, honestly – that was a legendary collab. Also, it’s super weird how much you love to poop, but whatever. Maybe you’ll grow out of it at 19. You’re going to kill it today, and every day after. I love you, stupid.” Click. Send.

As Paige lay there, she quietly thanked God for giving her Azzi Fudd.

And when Azzi awoke and heard Paige’s message first thing in the morning, she pressed her face into her pillow for two reasons – first, to quiet her laugh from her sleeping roommate, and second, to hide her blush that had begun creeping up her neck. The two things Paige had wanted to give her.

_________________

The Huskies beat Fort Hays State 111 to 47.

Azzi had played an amazing 22 minutes – making 22 points. Her teammates had cheered for her, patting her aggressively on the back and letting her know she was off the hook from Freshmen duty for the rest of the week. Paige clung to her, her arm around her shoulder like Velcro, shaking her every few minutes to yell, “My sharp shooter,” and “Best duo in the nation right here.” Azzi couldn’t remember the last time her cheeks hurt so bad from smiling.

Azzi, Paige, and Dorka found themselves doing the post-game press conference together – Azzi’s first. Paige found herself in the middle, and with one mic to share between the three of them, she took on the role of handing the mic to her teammates when needed.

As Azzi was asked her first question of the night, Paige leaned in and held the mic for her, just staring at her profile as she watched her friend nervously answer. Paige felt so proud of Azzi she thought her heart may burst out of her chest. Tonight was a cumulation of her best friend��s recovery and training, and they were finally doing the damn thing – together.

Paige continued watching Azzi as she spoke, her face slightly shiny still from running up and down the court. Paige’s eyes followed the straight bridge of her nose, the curve of her upper lip, her full bottom lip, her chin that made her face look like a heart, and now her large brown eyes that stared at her in confusion.

“Paige?” Azzi whispered, poking Paige in the knee.

“Huh?”

Oh. She was asked a question.

She blinked. “Yeah, I agree. Teamwork is everything,” Paige nodded at the group of reporters, feeling her face and neck grow ten shades of red. She heard Azzi snort.

The press asked Dorka a question next, and Paige happily handed her the microphone, staring at the table for the rest of the questions.

_________

Later, Paige and Azzi found themselves at Paige’s apartment, facetiming Azzi’s parents. They lay on Paige’s bed together, the temples of their heads touching as they both tried to fit on the phone camera.

“I miss you guys,” Azzi’s mom sighed. “You both played so well today.”

“She was a cannon, Katie,” Paige said proudly, “Absolute dimes on the court.”

“She gets it from me!” Mr. Fudd could be heard from across the room. The three women looked at one another and mouth no.

“Well, I’ll let you guys go – I’m sure you both are tired. Happy birthday again, honey, I’m so happy for you,” Mrs. Fudd said, pouting at having to say bye to her daughter(s).

“Thanks, mom,” Azzi smiled softly.

“Love you guys,” Azzi’s parents say through the camera, waving.

“Love you guys,” Paige and Azzi chorus back, smiling.

They hang up, and the two girls remain laying with their heads touching, eyes closed. Paige ignores how her left side touching Azzi feels prickly all over. Azzi ignores the way she can feel Paige’s eyelashes on her cheekbone when she blinks, and she definitely ignores the way she likes it.

Paige takes in a breath, “I didn’t mean to wait all day, but I got you something.”

“You didn’t have to,” Azzi says quietly, not wanting to move.

Paige hums and sits up; Azzi pretends to ignore the way she’s disappointed. Reaching under her nightstand, she grabs a blue gift bag, handing it to the younger girl gently.

Azzi smiled shyly, peering in the bag. Inside sat a stuffed dog that looked eerily similar to her dog at home, Stewie, a framed photo of the two of them with Steph Curry, blue light glasses, and a silver bracelet that read Azzi in cursive.

“I know you miss Stewie,” Paige started, suddenly feeling nervous, “And you said your eyes hurt from your laptop.”

Azzi looked up at her, smiling broadly. “Paige,” She laughed lightly, “Where did you even find this bracelet? No place has my name. Did you get it ordered custom?”

Paige scoffed, “No, I found it at like a gas station or something.” (Paige did not find it at a gas station; she had it custom made on Etsy and delivered a month ago).

Azzi just shook her head and smiled at her, reaching up to hug her around the neck. They held each other for a moment, chins resting in each other’s necks. Paige’s heart stuttered, particularly at Azzi’s, “You’re the best. Love you, Boogers.”

Paige took a breath threw her nose into Azzi’s shoulder, her voice coming out muffled, “Love you.”

A few moments later, they pulled apart, both looking at the alarm clock on Paige’s nightstand that read 12:00am. Azzi let out a sigh, languidly stretching her arms over her head and rolling her neck.

Paige, staring at her beginning to sit up and leave, found herself blurting, “Do you want to sleepover?”

Azzi looked at her and blinked once. “Yeah.”

Paige nodded, smoothing an invisible wrinkle on her sweatpants, “Cool.”

And so, they fell asleep facing each other. However, first, as Azzi snored lightly beside her, Paige lay awake wondering if she was coming down with a fever. Because, for the love of God, she’s never felt so weird before around Azzi.

Something was seriously wrong with her.

[soft4gguk]

Miss tessa, care to share what started or inspired you to write tbah? :)

I literally remember everything I did the day I sat down and wrote that very first chapter. I am that intense about this story!! lmao. I feel like the whole day served as inspiration! I was laying by the sun and it was a really hot summer day and it was kinda lazy and slow too... and I remember my mom and my aunt talking about motherhood. and now my mom had me twenty some years ago, but my aunt had my little cousin a couple of years back so she was still very much new to being a mom. and they were just... talking about what it was like. and sharing advice. and also talking about the hardships. I wasn't really in the conversation, mostly just listening, and that's the magic of silence because the first chapter just came to me suddenly. I couldn't get out of there fast enough!! and I ran to my computer and started writing. I had no idea where the story would go from there but I wrote chapter one because I felt like nothing else mattered (this is my favourite thing about writing). and so afterwards the story started growing arms and legs, if you will hehe. and the inspiration after that was the season, I guess. idk. I just remember the first chapters coming to me after a long day of being in the sun, or by the sea. maybe it has nothing to do with the plot in itself, but tbah has always felt like summer to me. anyways!! thanks for this question it was so cool to answer. ilu <333 xo

[sleepymaven]

HSR: Halovians' Halos

My Headcanon/Idea About Halovian Halos

Alright, let's get into it!

So, halovians' halos are not attached to their heads, as we already know and can see clearly with Robin.

Robin with her halo clearly removed from her head to disguise herself.

We can also see in Robin's trailer that they can shine their halos, like gold and any other metal.

Robin getting her halo shined for the cameras. Courtesy of our beloved Sunday ♡

So, this got me thinking. What if the halos are just pieces of metal?

Thinking about it some more, no matter how you look at it, there could be no way they are born with metal hovering over their heads, right? Whether they hatch from an egg or come out live from their mother, it would theoretically be impossible.

Unless, somehow it sprouts up after they are born, this just wouldn't work from a biological standpoint.

So... what if their parents make their halos for them after they are born?

It could be a sentimental and special experience crafting and welding the metal for their new child together, gifting it to them once they are born so they can keep it with them for their whole life.

It would explain why they are removable, can be cleaned and polished, and would add a nice sentimental touch to every halovians' unique halo as it would have been painstakingly crafted from their parents.

This could also add a sort of angst element if you were to create a halovian character without a halo or just with a plain halo.

It could mean that they were abandoned or their parents did not put much care or time into their child and that would be reflected more outwardly that way.

Perhaps a lack of halo could also signify a halovian going against their heritage and abandoning their family themselves. After all, what better way to shun your parents then to rid yourself of the one special gift they gave to you to remember them by?

Omg, I love this thought of mine! I'm so proud of myself here for thinking this up at like 2 in the morning! This is one of my best thoughts I've dreamt up in a hot minute. :3

[buttercup0art]

I did this drawing a month ago and I wanted to draw more around it but I can feel my motivation slipping away. Oh well, it is what it is. I just really love these two.

[sonicvoid]

Hey so about horror games that permanently warp your fuckin world for a couple months without ever elaborating? Yeah.

[morrigan-sims]

Btw, if you ever see me post about a book/movie/game/ANYTHING, that is an open invitation to talk to me about it. Tell me your opinions, talk to me about your builds and characters for video games, scream at me about good or bad scenes in books, shows, or movies. (Or if there’s a book/movie/game/whatever that you think I’d like, TELL ME. Please give me recs.) There is nothing in the world I love more than talking about media of any kind (except for talking about my OCs but I know that’s a harder ask.)

Also, PLEASE tell me about your dnd characters. Make them in the sims and tag me in the post. Infodump and tag me. Infodump in my DMs. Ask for my Discord and message me there. I mean it. I am on my knees BEGGING for people to talk to me about not just things I love, but things YOU love.

Send me an ask (anon is ALWAYS on), a DM, ask for my Discord, anything. I swear on everything I hold dear that asks or DMs are never w bother. (/gen)

I’m always down to discuss plot, characters, mechanics, worldbuilding, any of it. TTRPGs/CRPGs and sci-fi/fantasy books + movies are the center of my wheelhouse, but honestly I just love having in-depth discussions about things. (Oh and I could (and have, much to my friends and family’s dismay) talk for HOURS about Black Sails.)

[headroom-moods]

When you realize it, Tim was never the other woman— it always has been Lucy.

[nono-uwu]

So for no reason at all (/hj) i feel like i should clarify that whenever I shit on ons or any of it's characters or even the story or artstyle it's never meant as a genuine attack on kagami or yamamoto because, despite everything, I still adore ons (hell, i can't stfu about it and want to see it become better). Part of my humor is exegerating things to an unnecessary degree for comedic effect lol

Seeing the story and artstyle go certain directions is offputting at first and since i usually just dump my inital thoughts on a chapter and then dip, it doesn't come off that i end up rolling with the punches.

If you really hate where the manga is going then, idk, don't bother reading? Plenty of people enjoy stuff without full knowledge of said stuff, nothing is stopping you from ignoring the current story and only focusing on the parts you like. I mean, I don't care about mikayuu and thus only mention them when they are shoved in my face via the chapters

Hell, if you're anything like me you've made your own version of the story! And if that makes you enjoy ons more (it does for me) all the more power to you!

[anxiously-sidequesting]

So I've been Sinning because I've been making posts on Malorn and Duncan individually but I don't think I ever really touched up on how their relationship with EACH OTHER would be and that's literally the most traumatizing thing I can think of for either of them

This is like, moreso purely speculation and 🌈 imagination🌈 anyways because I don't think there's like any canon material on the two of them interacting and their arcs and backstories are as small as bacteria in the first place but literally those two on their own could have their own fucking show with how much UNTAPPED STORYLINE that can come out of "Borderline child prodigy forced into and struggling with important position" Malorn and "Troubled child with undiscussed emotional issues and a jealousy complex borne from said position" Duncan

Idk about any type of interaction or relationship these two might have had before Malistaire became the Joker, but I can imagine there's ALREADY some type of rivalry (at LEAST one sided) between two guys in the same school in the same class, one of them is blatantly better than the other at everything they do and it's not the guy who says he is. (Like, idek how Malorn himself feels about him being the best in his class, but from what we've seen he doesn't brag about, mislead, or exaggerate about it like Duncan does. And the insane thing is Malorn AT LEAST would have a BASIS on his claims and attitude even if he was being a jerk about it)

But the thing is, Malorn back then as a regular student would not have been in any position to be up close and personal with Duncan in any meaningful way during school hours. Like they're classmates, at best they get grouped on a project together, but Malorn and Duncan being together would not be required and important until AFTER Malistaire dips and Malorn is now Duncan's PROFESSOR. Now in a totally more complicated and intimate way than before, Malorn and Duncan HAVE to interact with each other, speak and work with each other because now Malorn is the new Death teacher and he has to handle the brunt of Duncan's education and progress. GIRLS YOU NEED TO READ THAT LAST PART AGAIN BECAUSE THAT IS SO IMPORTANT!!!!!!!

Malorn and Duncan literally CANNOT escape each other if they wanted to do their jobs (good, unbiased educator and student still receiving education respectively). Yeah they may not be like, personal tutor and student but Duncan is in MALORN'S class now, and just that position alone puts a type of pressure on both of them to still maintain their respective roles and civility while dealing with the person who Does Not Make You Happy on a more personal level than before. That sucks actually

Like, Duncan couldn't even lie to Malorn about how "well" he's doing in Death class when he can SEE his papers. Duncan can't hide his grades papers from his professor, Duncan is no longer able to pull the wool over Malorn's eyes like he does with EVERYONE ELSE. Duncan already had some type of issues with being second best, but imagine one of the people that was threatening Duncan's spot as first place becomes his superior. His superior that can SEE that Duncan is in fact, not the best. Duncan can't even PRETEND that Malorn isn't better than him anymore because it's been proven, when Malorn was made Professor instead of him, and Malorn himself now has an inside view of Duncan's insincerity. What little ""power"" Duncan thought he had was now ALL taken away from him

AND THEN MALORN DOESN'T HAVE IT MUCH BETTER, because here's this little shit that just seems to hate him for no reason???? Idk if Malorn ever knew about Duncan bragging about himself or his jealousy of him in general before Malistaire left, but whether or not he did before he most likely knows NOW. With his new position and him having to care for Duncan as a student rather than a peer, now suddenly Malorn is in Duncan's DIRECT line of fire and he has no wiggle room to step aside or remove himself because in order for Malorn to be a good teacher *he has to be there for Duncan*. He no longer has the luxury to just "ignore" Duncan or even put him in his place if that's what he really wanted, because now Malorn has to be a certain type of responsible and not abandon or get into fights with students that give him any issues (looking at you Malistaire and Mabrose 😒)

Yeah ofc Malorn could always discipline Duncan or smth but what's the use if this one student is just adamant on causing issues? It seems like Duncan has more of a 'hands off' type of technique when trying to get what he wants (using other people to finish his homework for him), but it's super easy to imagine Duncan just doing little or petty things to undermine Malorn's authority in any way he can. Nothing evil but just like challenging or questioning Malorn's lessons during class, mouthing off whenever he can, things that are used to blow off steam and stick it to Malorn in what little way he can definitely sounds like some shit Duncan would do. And what are you supposed to do when this kid, someone who is YOUR AGE but is still essentially supposed to be listening to YOU, is lashing out at you and disrupting class every chance he gets? Discipline him for the hundredth time?

Imagine how this grates on Malorn's nerves how on top of everything else, on top of everyone else already being jumpy and snippy around him, in addition to his entire lifestyle being turned around, even with his tutor and someone he looked up to betraying him in the worst way, even with ALL OF THAT, this *ooooooone* person decides to go out of their way to continuously punish you for it. Malorn is doing his job, what he's expected of no matter how unfair or tiring or unrewarding it may be, and he is being persecuted by someone for a job *he never even asked for*.

Malorn did not plan or hope for ANY of this to happen. Yeah being a Professor sounds cool and shit at first glance but like I've said once before Malorn at that time is still like 12 years old and the change is so absolutely sudden and jarring that Malorn couldn't have even possibly PREPARED for this situation. Whether or not Malorn is actually good at his job now does not push aside the fact that Malorn may not have even WANTED to be in that job in the first place!! We have no way of knowing if Malorn was seriously like "man I wish I was a teacher right now" at ANY point of his life, but it's safe to say he most likely DID NOT because Malorn was never flaunting or showcasing his talent to everyone like Duncan was!! Perhaps the one person who wants this THE LEAST is being unfairly judged by the person who wanted it THE MOST

AND THAT ^^^^^^^ is getting to the core of this Malorn VS. Duncan thing going on here. Two opposites, two extremes that are forced together unwillingly and they're both unnecessarily suffering for it.

And at the end, when The Wizard is trying to do shit and Duncan pops up like "aaayyyy 🤪🖕" and is defeated in 2 seconds, how does that affect them both? Does Malorn ever like, know this about Duncan? Did Duncan even graduate before he was manipulated into a literal cult?

Imagine how messed up Malorn would feel if he ever found out. Would he take it personally, even though none of it was his fault? Would he still FEEL that it was his fault, that the one person who hated him sooo much it became the catalyst to his downfall? Would Malorn feel responsible for Duncan and all the hurt he's caused and all the hurt he's felt even though he shouldn't?

And the saddest part is even if Malorn did suffer any type of way from knowing how Duncan turned out to be, his responsibilities wouldn't leave him that much time to mourn before he had to go back to work. The saddest part is that even though Duncan was told over and over that he was alone and that nobody cared for him, he had Malorn by his side the entire time more than willing to support him. Their relationship is so interesting to me because it's so tragic and multifaceted when ultimately things could have been at least moderately better if the world hadn't let them both down

[dawdlecentric]

Man, this doujin isn't fucking around

Meanwhile, Seikuri in the background...

Doujin: Flashbackers by Totobe

[oikatzo]

"The one that protected Uma Musume from perversion, Nexon's Blue Archive"

this post gets it

[nooly]

i am OBSESSED with tiny glade!! here is the crazy weird little city i build based on the daily promt "sun temple"

[light-wrath-paradise]

Thought about making a fan-chapter for Slay The Princess as well but what the hell could I even say. I fear all the beats of a heart have already been spelled out in the night sky.

[naomiknight-17]

The Uber driver who took us home from the vet today ended up hearing all about Billi's situation because I couldn't stop crying and he asked what was wrong

(Dude you picked us up from the vet and we have an empty carrier take a wild guess)

And he told us he used to have a Labrador retriever, who was a very good and loyal dog, and when his dog died, he couldn't eat or sleep for three days due to the grief. Because of how painful it was, he'll never have a pet again

And he's not the first person I've met who feels that way. I have a close friend who, after losing two cats and a rabbit, decided she just didn't want pets anymore

And I get it, sort of. Losing Billi is the most painful thing I've been through in a long long time. But it's worth it for every moment of love and joy she brought us. It's worth it to know that we gave the best home we could to a cat who was difficult and otherwise unwanted.

I've always had a cat. My parents adopted their first cat when mom was pregnant with me. Dad named her after Scat Cat from the Aristocats. He probably didn't think that through. She was a grumpy girl but had her sweet moments. She lived to be 18. She was family. I got my first cat who was really mine, and not just the family cat, when I was around 11. Her name was Pooky, another name I had no choice in. Then there was Pepper and Lulu and Cookie and then Lulu had kittens and we kept Mackenzie then Maggie and Billi then finally our current cats; Pekoe, Leon and Tim

And each loss was devastating in its own way, but I cannot imagine my life without all these wonderful cats having been part of it. My mom's kitchen feels so empty now that Billi isn't there. A whole house without cats? I don't know how I could live in it

Our person-to-cat ratio is currently 4-3 and it feels wrong. There should be at least one cat per person. But I will wait and grieve and eventually the universe will send another cat my way. It always does.

[devotedlystrangewizard]

i dont like saying astarion is my least favorite of the companions because it makes me feel like im such a "look at me im so special" guy but he honest to fucking god. is my least favorite. i cannot keep silent on this matter. i think hes a good character, i think neil did a fantastic job with him, but also hes committed the unforgiveable sin of annoying me and for that he gets one thousand years in brain jail

[pokemonruby]

nintendo randomly dropping that a zelda movie has been in development for years smack dab in the middle of a tuesday afternoon was definitely not on my bingo chart holy shit