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allthatyoulove · 3 years

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Dance With Me

Loki / Reader

Summary: You’re at Tony’s masquerade party, when Loki asks you to dance.

Warnings: cussing and dirty talk maybe? nothing too bad

Words: 1.5k

A/N: The summary is pretty short just b/c this is more of a drabble that I had the idea for like an hour before I wrote it. Also, sorry the gif is so big I’m not sure how to fix it but he’s hot so it’s ok; Hope you enjoy the story! Feel free to leave any feedback and please let me know of any warnings or errors I missed! Thanks for stopping by :)

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I ran my hands down the sides of my dress, smoothing it one last time as I looked in the mirror. I grabbed my mask and tied it at the back of my head, checking myself out before I headed back out to the ballroom.

Tony was throwing a masquerade ball and all the avengers were forced to go. He didn’t even really have a reason or cause for this ball, this was all a last minute cover-up party for the kinky stuff Steve had found in Pepper’s laundry the other day. Regardless, Thor wouldn’t let it go after Tony said it was for “party purposes” and insisted that he throw a masquerade.

So, here we are.

Tony rented a gigantic elegant ballroom, ever the billionaire, with only the most expensive alcohol, food, clothes, and people.

The avengers were spread throughout the room. Thor was flirting with some women by the bar who looked uninterested, T’Challa was on the dance floor with Steve and Sam while Bucky stood with them subtly moving to the music, Vision and Wanda were sitting at a table flirting like highschoolers, and Natasha was on her way to steal the hearts of the girls Thor was talking to. Bruce was talking with Tony and Clint. Pepper and Shuri were sitting with me, across the table from Wanda and Vision.

I was searching the crowd for the dramatically dark and mysterious avenger that has yet to be seen.

I’d think he would thrive in a setting like this, being able to dress with flair and saunter all over the dance floor terrorizing people from underneath a mask. Or, maybe he doesn’t want his face to be covered at all, instead wanting all the attention on his prominent cheekbones. Either way, the function was in full effect and he was nowhere to be seen.

It’s not that I’m purposefully looking for him, because I’m not, I just feel…. an absence from the room.

Don’t get me wrong, Tony threw some good parties, and I was having fun, I was just missing out on tormenting my least favorite avenger.

I must have been deep in thought, because I found myself having to refocus my eyes on the room and come back down from my mind when I heard his voice.

“Looking for someone, darling?”

I sighed as I turned around in my chair, seeing Loki straightening after crouching so he could whisper in my ear.

“That’s funny actually, I was just wondering when you would come to ruin the night”

He let out a deep laugh, closing his eyes. I took this second to look at what he was wearing before he made some smart remark about it.

He was in an all-black suit, head to toe. Not a splash of color. Black blazer, black tie, black shirt….black mask.

“I’m glad you decided to bless us all tonight and wear a mask. I would’ve guessed you’d hate to have to hide your brooding underneath something so elegant and pleasing.”

He instantly replied, as if he knew what I was going to say from the beginning.

“Well, I do love to please.”

He paused for a beat before continuing while I smirked and shook my head in disbelief. The song changed from something upbeat and more-danceable, to a beautiful, slow, dancing ballad.

“And, speaking of pleasing,” He made a gesture of looking me up and down in my chair with my legs crossed.

“You look enchanting.”

My face warmed, but I kept my expression as I replied in a flirtatious tone.

“Such a charmer, aren’t you? Is there something you want, Loki?”

He smirked and didn’t take his eyes off of mine.

“Dance with me.”

He held one hand out to me, keeping the other behind his back in proper fashion.

I picked up my glass of wine I had sitting in front of me and chugged the rest of it before grabbing his hand.

Shuri and Pepper laughed, going back to their conversation they were having before as Loki and I walked to the dance floor.

“I should tell you I have no idea how to dance.” I told him as we reached the dance floor.

He let go of my hand and stood in front of me, never dropping his smirk.

“You seem to know how to dance pretty well at Tony’s other parties”

I jokingly rolled my eyes, “Well I can’t exactly shake my ass in a ballroom, can I? No matter how much you’d like it.”

He laughed and grabbed my hand, resting his other hand delicately at the small of my back. I immediately stopped smirking and stiffened a little, not sure what to do with my hands.

“Relax” he whispered, guiding the hand that wasn’t holding his to the back of his neck.

I let out a breath and relaxed into this new position we were in, waiting for something to happen. I wasn’t sure what to expect or what to do, so I was going to let him lead with everything.

We stood still for a second, staring at each other. His eyes roamed my face for a second before he softly cleared his throat and began to dance.

My feet followed his to the sound of the music as we started to waltz across the dance floor. The song was a slower song, and I found my feet interesting as we started to dance.

“Look at me”

I looked up at him, raising my eyebrows in a silent question.

“I meant what I said earlier”

“And what was it you said earlier?”

“When I said that you look beautiful”

I smiled at him as I spoke, “I believe the word you used was ‘enchanting’”

He laughed, switching his gaze from my eyes to my lips briefly.

“Well, there’s quite a few different words that could describe how you look”

I leaned in a little closer, wrapping my hand that was around the back of his neck a little tighter, and whispering like I was telling him a secret.

“Like what?”

He didn’t reply right away, instead dancing a few more seconds before he lightly twirled me, bringing me back to him closer than before. His arm was fully around my waist now, and our faces were centimeters apart when he spoke again.

“I don’t know if some of the ones I’m thinking are appropriate here, with people around.”

He looked at my lips as they slightly parted, in shock of how bold he was being tonight. I didn’t want him to read too much into my pause, so I quickly got myself together and responded.

“Well now I have to know”

He let out a deep chuckle, looking around the room as he thought of what to say next. I smiled a real smile at him, at how he looked. At how we were right now. I smiled up at him, looking at his eyes, waiting for his reply.

He brought his face back down to meet mine, his eyes dark. He had a sly look on his face. The face of the god of mischief. I was even more excited to hear it now. This was going to be good.

“Why don’t I show you? Tonight, in your room? I would offer right here, right now, but seeing as you already brought up the fact that we’re in a ballroom isn’t appropriate, I’m willing to wait.”

I froze, my feet stopping in their place as I looked up at him in surprise. Or shock, maybe? My mouth stayed slightly parted. He didn’t waste any time when I stopped dancing, picking me up with his arm that was around my waist to slowly spin us around. I was completely off the ground, and he picked me up as if I weighed nothing.

His eyes never left mine, as if he was searching for my answer in them. I was scared he would find it, too, with the intensity that he had in his eyes.

After looking at him in shock for a couple of seconds and not saying anything, I gave a dry laugh before I responded.

“Okay then, pretty boy. I guess we’ll see if you’re worthy of being a god after all.”

He smiled at me, setting me down on my feet as the song slowly came to a close. Our faces were still so close, if I leaned in just a little…

Everyone around us clapped for the live performers as the song ended. I was snapped out of my little haze as I took a step back from him, out of his arms. My waist felt cold, felt empty without his touch.

I gave him a mock curtsy, holding my dress out to him. He smirked and did the same to me, holding out his arms as if to show me off.

“I’ll see you tonight, darling.”

He walked off the dance floor and into the crowd, leaving me standing on the dance floor to relive everything that just happened.

#loki #loki x reader #loki x reader imagine #MCU #loki odinson #loki imagine #loki (marvel)#marvel imagine

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telehxhtrash · 4 years

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I originally wanted to make two separate posts about this but i’m actually making a single one : the overarching theme of love, redemption, second chances and Togashi’s overall positive and optimistic writing are leading me to believe a few things concerning Killua and Gon’s relationship, namely that we’ll get an explicit romantic confession to canonize their relationship, but also that Gon is actually the one who fell for Killua first.

First of all, I know I say it a lot but I really, really do believe that by the end of the manga, Killua and Gon’s relationship will be a canon romantic one. I wrote a short post about this already, but I’m gonna explain briefly my point of view on this as I believe it’s important and relevant to the points I want to try and make in this post.

• Killua is pretty much canonically in love with Gon. There’s just too much subtext concerning this matter, and the “shinjuu” line single-handedly canonizes that fact. Togashi is a very, very smart man, and doesn’t throw random words around, he knows the weight of the word shinjuu and what it implies, and the entire chimera ant arc focuses on Killua’s feelings towards Gon, so there is no doubt in my mind that Killua canonically has romantic feelings for him. These two tweets live in my head rent free because it’s so wonderfully written, so here you go :

• I also deeply believe that Togashi would never leave this ambiguous. I wrote a full post about this if you want to read it, but basically, it doesn’t fit Togashi’s writing style. A lot of people say that Togashi’s queer rep is ambiguous in HxH, but it’s unfair because HxH is literally not over yet. There are still ambiguous things because the manga is still developing. Thing is, Togashi has put queer characters in his previous works, and it was never ambiguous. It was always explicitely stated. Same goes for the relationships between his characters. There’s no reason to believe this wouldn’t be the case for HxH.

• Togashi’s positive writing is echoed in Killua’s story arc, in the sense that Killua reflects Togashi’s optimistic writing style and the overarching theme of love, redemption, second chances and the power human connection.

Killua’s character arc is one of slowly changing your life around, becoming your best self with a little help from someone to show you the way, it’s about positive growth, healing from trauma and going against what people think of you. It’s about healing and becoming your best self, no matter what.

It’s a very positive character arc, and one that’s been thoroughly demonstrated during the entire story.

That’s why Killua’s romantic feelings towards Gon could never stay unrequited one way or another, because it just would defeat the entire positive narrative of Killua’s character arc. Because Killua’s character arc is about healing and growing, and even though you thought you could never do that, learn how to love. It’s about finding love after abuse.

And to me, the only way to complete that story arc, when we know that Killua canonically has romantic feelings towards Gon, would be for Gon to return those feelings. Because Killua’s character arc isn’t only about learning how to love someone no matter what, but also about being loved in return. That’s how you complete Killua’s positive story arc.

I’ll come back to this theme a bit later on, though.

• There’s no way Shonen Jump can intervene and censor HxH. Now, I think I’m one of the few meta writers who actually believes this, but I’m 100% convinced that Shonen Jump always knew that HxH is queer work. I wrote multiple posts about this : the first post I linked mentions why SJ probably knows ; on the general gay subtext in both anime adaptations ; on 99 specifically and finally on the fact that it’s weird that gay subtext was emphasized in 99 anime when there was none in canon material only for it to appear later on in the manga.

But to summarize, there’s just no way Shonen Jump doesn’t know.

First of all, Hunter x Hunter is published right after Yu Yu Hakusho. Thing is, Togashi ended YYH for a few reasons, but one of them was because he didn’t feel free of doing what he wanted to do with his story, because Jump kept on declining his ideas.

This led him to completely drop the story. Now, if you’re a manga writer who’s been deeply disgusted by how your last manga was controlled, what would you do ? I’m sure you would make 100% sure you could take your next story wherever you wanted. And I’m certain that’s what Togashi did. Because to be able to write his story the way he wanted, he had to make sure SJ would allow him to go anywhere he wanted. That includes his characters and their relationship dynamics, which are the basics when you pitch a story.

Togashi also emphasized in one of his interviews that he’s free to do whatever he wants.

Furthermore, Togashi’s editors and Shonen Jump aren’t dumb. They can definitely pick up on the gay subtext. If they didn’t want gay things in HxH, they would’ve never let Togashi publish some chapters, ESPECIALLY the chapter where Killua declares he’ll commit shinjuu with Gon. SJ isn’t dumb. Shinjuu hits HARD, especially in japanese, so they definitely know what it means (it’s literally the equivalent to saying them dying together would be like Romeo and Juliet).

Finally, and that’s half crack-theory half serious, but one of the main reasons I believe SJ knows is because of the 99 anime adaptation. It was HxH’s first anime adaptation, and Togashi was involved in it to some extent. Now, 99 is extremely gay. I linked the posts where I talk about it above, but basically, it’s rainbow flags overlay on top of the characters in the opening, gay opening and ending song lyrics, over the top gay lines and situations.... which is interesting. Because like i mentioned in one of these posts, it’s interesting that this gay subtext was present and highlighted in the anime adaptation when there was none in the manga at that stage. It’s very, very interesting that gay subtext appeared later on in the manga, after the anime adaptation went crazy with it. I firmly believe it’s because Togashi pitched his manga as gay to the 99 animators, and if so, that’d mean SJ would also know.

Anyways ! In short, I believe Killua and Gon’s relationship will become canon by the end of the manga because there’s no risk of editorial meddling since SJ probably knows this is where the story is going. Killua’s romantic feelings are also pretty much canon, and the only way to complete his positive character arc would be to have Gon return those feelings and prove that you’re worthy of love no matter what. Finally, Togashi would never leave it ambiguous, because that’s something he’s never done before, and Killua and Gon’s relationship has never been portrayed as ambiguous nor subtle, it’s still developing.

Now !! This was just an introduction to what I wanted to talk about in this post, I’m sorry you still have a bit more reading to do HAHAA

But !

With this belief in mind that Killugon will be canon in the end, there are two things I want to talk about.

• First, I genuinely believe we’ll get a romantic, highly emotional love confession scene between the two of them. For the sole fact that it’s something deeply intertwined with Killua’s character arc.

Like I mentioned above, Killua’s arc is about overcoming trauma and having a second chance at life, a chance to be better, a chance to be your best self. His arc is about opening up his heart to new experiences and new feelings, and learning how to love and pass that love around. His story arc is representation for trauma survivors that things can and will get better, and you can overcome anything, turn your entire life around, heal, and thrive.

And to me, the completion of that story arc is definitely to show that not only can you learn to open up your heart and love someone, but that you can be loved for who you are. That someone can look at you for who you are, accept you and love you no matter what. You can be loved by someone the same way you love them, in a romantic way.

To me, that’s where the story is going. Considering Killua’s canonical romantic feelings, and the overall positive themes surrounding his character arc, there’s no doubt in my mind that this is the message Togashi wants to convey.

And in my opinion, this message wouldn’t be delivered ambiguously or subtly. This narrative of being loved has always been enforced through highly emotional scenes throughout the manga, to highlight the message that yes !! you, trauma survivor !! can be loved for who you are !!

It’s been expressed through that emotional scene where Nanika tells Killua she loves him, for example.

It’s also been displayed in the countless scenes where Gon expresses his love for Killua, expresses his admiration for him, how he’s glad he’s met him, how happy he makes him, how Killua is his best friend in the entire world.... It’s been conveyed through the stargazing scene on Whale Island, through the entire Zoldyck Family Arc where Gon waltzs in the Zoldyck Mansion to rescue Killua, through the scene in Greed Island Arc where Gon tells him he’s glad to have met him, through the dodgeball match scene where Gon declares that it can only be Killua holding the ball, through the moment Gon says that the first thing he’ll do when he sees Ging is introduce him to his best friend in the whole world, Killua.

Togashi could have chosen to show and not tell that Gon cares a lot about Killua, and that he finally found someone who loves him for who he is. He could’ve made them hang out normally, and we would’ve understood that Killua found someone who accepts him. But no, this has always been the main theme of HxH. Seeing the both of them grow closer and closer and grow and heal together. He chose to highlight the fact that he’s loved and cared for through words of affirmation to emphasize the narrative of being loved after surviving trauma. For the purpose of providing an extremely clear message of love to trauma and abuse survivors who identify with Killua : that you can find someone like Gon, someone who will love you for who you are. Togashi wanted to make it explicitly clear.

So now, since all of these words of affirmation were “platonic” (i’ll come back to the quotation marks in the last part of this post), but still highly emotional :

Wouldn’t it make sense that the romantic application of this narrative would also be portrayed through a highly emotional scene ?

For the sole purpose of highlighting the final message of Killua’s story arc of overcoming your past and being loved and accepted for who you are, in a romantic way this time ? Of being loved the same way you love ?

Since we’ve had so many platonic reaffirmations of this idea, I think it’d be fitting for the romantic part of the narrative to be conveyed through a highly emotional scene. Like a confession scene under the stars that would parallel the stargazing scene on Whale Island, for example, since stars are thematically fitting since they are linked to Killua’s story echoing Tanabata.

An open love confession would be the final and ultimate way to cement that narrative of loving and being loved. A highly emotional scene, just like we’ve always had, to demonstrate the romantic application of the theme of being loved after experiencing trauma. The ultimate, non-ambiguous message of unconditional love for trauma survivors.

Showing that you, trauma survivor who identifies with Killua, can learn to love yourself, love someone else and be loved in return.

• Keeping Killua’s character arc in mind, I want to adress a final point that I deeply believe is true.

To me, Gon is the one that actually fell in love with Killua first.

Thing is, Gon is that type of character that acts first and thinks later on. He always does things on instinct, only giving it thought after the thing happened. So it 100% makes sense that it would apply to romantic feelings too. That’s why, to me, it’s very likely that Gon fell in love first but just didn’t realize it was romantic feelings, because he’s 12, never really thought about it and feelings are confusing. And to me, Togashi is setting up feelings realization on Gon’s part.

Gon has always behaved very intensely with Killua, always reaffirming how much he means to him. He’s always taken onto that role of providing Killua with love from the moment he met him. He accepted him for who he is, and always made him feel cared for.

Togashi definitely planted the seeds for a possible interpretation of this idea of him falling first. The stargazing scene on Whale Island is just.... so romantic in nature. Gon tells Killua that he’s happy when he’s with him under a starry night sky, tells him he wants to travel the world with him and stay with him, because his presence next to him fills him with joy. Then we have his constant words of affirmation towards Killua, and how cool he is, how amazing and strong he is...

But to me, what really convinces me that Gon fell first is Greed Island arc. Gon’s behavior towards Killua during this arc was extremely emotional. It was deep, deep care and love for his best friend. We get to see him blush as he tells Killua that he’s really, really glad he’s here with him and glad he’s met him.

We get to see him declare that the first thing he’ll do when he finds Ging will be to introduce his amazing best friend to him.

But honestly, what made my brain explode is the dodgeball scene.

Because as I mentioned in this post, the phrasing Gon uses is one that is used in romantic contexts to confess to someone. It’s a love declaration, literally. And I don’t believe Gon meant it as romantic, because he probably has no idea his feelings are romantic in nature. But. Togashi is a troll. He really, really enjoys toying with his readers.

To me, the fact this sentence is romantic in nature could be Togashi putting Gon’s feelings right in front of our faces, hiding it in double meaning but still plainly there for us to see. It could be Togashi toying with us in the process of setting up Gon’s feelings, so that when it gets canonized that Gon fell first, on a re-read of the manga, you go “oh. that sentence is romantic. it was literally right in front of our eyes the entire time”. I’m probably reaching !!! but!!!! the fact is, this sentence is still romantic in meaning. It’s still coated in romantic subtext. And that’s intentional on Togashi’s part.

I’ll link this magnificent post by Quintessence that basically explains what I just said much better.

In short, it would totally make sense that Gon fell first. It wouldn’t come out of nowhere, since Gon’s behavior from the beginning of the manga can definitely be interpreted as romantic in nature. The countless emotional scenes where he asserts how much he cares for Killua can definitely be read as romantic, and Gon’s behavior can definitely be explained by him having a crush on Killua, despite him not knowing.

Now, the thing that makes me further believe this is true is the fact that symbolically speaking, it makes sense that Gon fell in love with Killua first. It would enforce the narrative of Killua’s character arc of being loved for who you are and not having to earn love.

It would literally dismiss everything Killua believes about having to earn the right to be loved. About having to earn his place right next to Gon. About having to change to be good enough for Gon.

Because if Gon fell first, then Killua was loved for who he is from the beginning, from the moment they met. Killua didn’t have to earn his love, like he thought he had to, especially in CAA, because he was loved the same way all along.

It’d show that Gon didn’t start to love Killua because Killua earned that right by changing for Gon. He didn’t start to love Killua when he started to heal and change his life to become a good person. He was always loved for who he is because Gon always saw him and loved him no matter what.

And that would once again highlight Killua’s character arc beautifully. It’d show that you are worthy of love even if you literally just came out of years of abuse. That someone can look at you and instantly fall in love with you, no matter how broken and unworthy of love you think you are. You never, ever had to earn that love. It was always here to begin with.

It’d break Chimera Ant Arc completely, it’d break Killua’s belief that he was unworthy of staying by Gon’s side and that he had to earn his place. Because he was always loved and never had to earn his right to stay by Gon, because Gon wanted him there all along.

And that is a beautiful, deeply symbolic meaning that would complement Killua’s character arc perfectly.

It’d be Togashi showing trauma survivors that you can heal and love yourself, learn how love someone else and be loved in return.

Showing trauma survivors that you don’t have to prove your worth to be loved. That just like Killua, even if you came out of years of abuse, a broken, scared person, you’re always worthy of love. That you’re worthy of love at any stage of your healing phase. That you’re worthy of love no matter how broken you feel you are.

Someone will always love you and accept you for who you are.

Anyways !! Thank you for reading this !! Those two headcanons are really precious to me and I really do believe they could come true. Because it’d make sense in so many ways !

I know it’s hard to imagine such a thing happening, because queer representation has always been ambiguous that it’s hard to fathom a manga being openly gay, but I really want to be optimistic about it. We got the subtext, the author interested in LGBT-rep, the positive narrative and virtually no risk of being censored.

So I want to stay optimistic on this and believe that we’ll get a romantic love confession as a way to canonize their relationship, and that it’ll become evident one way or another that Gon fell in love with Killua first.

Thanks for reading !!

#hxh meta #killugon #meta #my meta #welp i hope im not reaching too much #but i really really really love the idea of an open romantic confession #and i wanted to explain why it could very much be possible #and i also love the hc that gon fell first #and it makes so much sense on so many levels #and would work with killua's story arc so well #anyways ty for reading this if u decide to do so !!!

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aitarose · 4 years

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hi! i’ve been so inactive lately and wanted to post something today, and i realized i haven’t made an appreciation post for my moots in a hot minute—so hey hotties, here’s some cute words about uu. oh and this isn’t all of my mutuals, just the one’s i’ve spoken to outside of the discord lol asjfdkl

@hesthermay —❥ you’re one of my best friends and ilysm and i hope that we get to meet in person one day, so you can endlessly hear me talk about how much i love jimmy woo. also i want to get matching marvel bracelets or smth, gonna look on etsy later for us ajskdlf

@probablydisgusting —❥ you’re like actually so funny and sweet, whenever you pop in the gc on snap just to say goodmorning or goodnight—it really makes everyone’s day and we love having you around. plus, you were one of the first people to pop into my inbox when i was an atla blog and i think that’s so nice.

@imarizaki —❥ i literaly love you sm mari, like you’re adorable and i want to give you a hug, i feel like you give rlly good hugs. and congrats on 400!! you deserve it and i hope 500 comes rolling around fast so you can hit another milestone in the near future ajskfdl

@tsukishumai —❥ cam i swear i know your name like I SWEAR I DO! you’re like an older sister to everyone in the discord and you bring such a comforting presence like it’s so nice to have you in the chat whenever you choose to pop in. you’re quite literally the calm to our insanity

@fukurodianthus —❥ dani you’re asleep rn but when you wake up and see this i want you do know that ily wifey. pls i love it when you harass me in my inbox, i think it’s so funny AND IM GOING TO FLOOD YOUR’S EVENTUALLY I JUST NEED TO BECOME ACTIVE AGAIN ASDJKL

@missmorosis —❥ you’re literally one of my favorite moots ever and you’re always so sweet to me and everyone else around you, it’s so heartwarming to see your positivity and happiness on tumblr and how hard you work! pls ilysm

@ray-ofmoonlight —❥ I LOVE TALKING TO YOU ABOUT THE BACHELOR. i haven’t responded in a hot minute, but dw i’ll answer in a bit i have to go through my messages jaksfld. you’re so nice and fun, and literally the sweetest ever

@diorzumi —❥ hi rheya! i’m so glad you took the time and all that hard work to make the server, like that’s insane and i still can’t believe you did all of that. pls the amount of effort you put into keeping it up is so evident and amazing!! also ur rlly pretty, like RLLY pretty

@luvoikawa —❥ gigi!! my face literally lights up whenever i see you in my notifs or on my dash pls. i love your energy sm and the presence you bring to the discord. like idk, you just seem really cool to me, does that make sense? like you have cool girl energy.

@sugas-cookie —❥ hello rissie. you should be sleeping rn, but ily and you’re my favorite and only child, and no matter what i say i would never bring you back to the ditch. but like...the frogs? i fucking hate the frogs, abolish all frogs they make me physically cringe i cannot.

@kei7ime —❥ CHLOEEE!! every time i see your theme i feel so satisfied, like it’s so pretty it rlly is. you’re so fun and i love talking to you or just popping in your inbox to say hi. omg hi chloe!! ok ok ily

@pxnk-velvet —❥ angie your drawing of us are so cute and i love them sm, and i can’t wait to read the story that you’ve been writing of our gc as a volleyball team, like pls i’m so excited. also the line “just shut up already, angie” lives in my head rent free

@miyalove —❥ hi dylan! i haven’t popped in your inbox in a while but i just wanted to tell you that i love u and you’re so nice and sweet and ilysm. you give off hot girl energy dylan, like for real, you rlly do.

@iwaizoom —❥ HI JADE. you’re so nice and your blog is so pretty, like the light green jaskljl PLS ITS SO PRETTY. i love the vibes you give off like you’re so chill and so easy to talk to sjakljdkl pls ilysm

@kageyuji —❥ lore i love you. like i love you. every time i talk to you i just feel happy like idk it’s this overwhelming feeling, you just have this gift where people feel comfortable when they’re talking to you. and your blog is so pretty pls asdjl

@hikariakaashi —❥ you’re one of my favorite moots, firstly bc of our interactions on tumblr in the early days of the discord and now on snap too. you have rlly good style, like rlly good style—and whenever you do your voice asks, your voice is like rlly pretty! girl you have a rlly pretty voice!

@ceci-chan —❥ hi twinnie! pls i think it’s so funny that we have literally the exact same nose, that’s actually wild. it’s so fun to watch your blog grow and your events are so cute and ily

@nekomabvc —❥ i buried you in here so you’d have to search for your part. literally going to say nothing i’m tired of writing about you goodbye. you called me a whore this morning. that’s not very swag of you, i’m going to report you to mab and cancel you on corpse tumblr.

@bellesowl —❥ hi isa! we haven’t interacted all that much, but in the times we have you’ve been so kind. and you’re rlly pretty, just sayin. you’re blog is also super aesthetic and i literally live for it, pls the muted tones are everything ajsdlk

@gellysticks —❥ angela pls you’re actually so funny like you’re so funny. every time your tiktoks come up in my suggested they literally make me laugh pls—but the frogs are terrible. abort frogs. this is a frog slandering blog. me and all my homies HATE frogs.

@cafemiya —❥ issy you give off such hot girl energy (and you are a hot girl anyways) and your energy is so contagious, like idk how it just is. you bring this positivity to the discord just by being there and i know everyone is so thankful that you’re so interactive with us jaskfdl

@biqherosix —❥ DANIZA I HAVEN’T OPENED YOUR SNAP YET BUT I RLLY WANT TO HEAR YOUR BAND PLAY. pls that’s literally so cool, like i wish i was in a cool band with my friends jsakdljkl. i love talking to you and we’ve been friends for like a good three months now which is crazy

@velvetfireworks —❥ rach i literally never read fics but yours are so good and they live in my head rent free. PLS THE SAKUSA ONE FOR THE BROKEN HEARTS CLUB AUDHS. you’re so nice and so talented and i reread your masterlist OMG I JUST REMEMBERED THE MOB AU ONE THAT ONE IS PERFECTION.

@hajiswife —❥ hi gabbie! your blog is gorgeous and your so nice pls!! like i literally can’t believe we’re mutuals it hits me like a brick. i love your works and your energy sjaklfdjl i’ll probably be popping in your inbox later just to say hi lol

@svgashi —❥ NIKE!!! omg we’re literally sister wives. you’re the first moot i had on tumblr that understood how great sugawara is and it’s like a breath of fresh air from the constant slandering my friends give him. ILY

@sexy-bee-juice —❥ aja!! i love getting your messages and just saying the most out of pocket things with you, and your reblogs make me laugh so hard like you’re rlly funny. also my broken french is terrible but i’m glad it makes you laugh ajskfdl

@koutarousangel —❥ MICKEY PLS YOURE SO FUNNY. I LOVE YOUR VIBES AND EVERYTHING LIKE YOURE FUNNY. and ily too. just putting that in there in case i haven’t said it in a while <3

@hvnlydmn —❥ hi ains! congrats on 5k!! that’s literally so insane like omg you must be reeling rn jadskfl you really really deserve it tho, everyone sees how hard you work and how much content you produce in such a short amount of time CONGRATS ILY

@akaashi-bby —❥ victoria you were the first person i talked to teen wolf with in like three years pls. i’m listening to a song from the show atm and it’s making me sad but ilysm and i love talking to you about literally anything

@laineywritesstuff —❥ LAINE!! hi! you’re so pretty like you look like you give the warmest hugs and i feel like if i ever met you in person i’d just get engulfed does that make sense? you’re so nice and ilysm and i hope you’re have a fantastic day!

@kiyoalex —❥ you’re rlly funny. like rlly funny. and i feel like we match each other’s energy pretty well in pms. pls my insanity is too real back there BUT IT’S OK I THINK BC YOU SEEM TO UNDERSTAND IT LOL ILY

@shoutamajiki —❥ hi nana!! you’re so nice and i’m so glad you joined the discord! and i’m so sorry i added you to my terrible private story on snap pls it’s so bad i’m very very sorry about that jksalfjdl

@sunacity —❥ nea i love your works so much like literally they LIVE in my head. you’re so talented and i can’t believe we’re mutuals that’s literally insane bc i love your stuff pls. and on top of being talented you’re so nice, like the nicest jaskdflj i can’t

ok ok i think that’s it for now, this isn’t all of my mutuals—but it’s the one’s i interact with the most and if we are moots and i didn’t include you pls my inbox or pms are always open to just like go insane in. ok have a great rest of your day!!

#2021:appreciation

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donaidk · 4 years

Text

Eyes Off You - Mick Schumacher

*Repost as I wanted it in a separate post rather than an ask, to make my blog organized. Hope you guys don’t mind :)*

I have changed things up a little but I hope you will still enjoy this! I loved writing it and tried to use everything you mentioned. Thank you for requesting and also reading!

TW: Body image issues (mild)

Note to Anon: Please never ever think like you’re not worth it just because you’re ‘out of someone’s league’! I wasted years of my life hating myself and feeling like crap just because people made me think I wasn’t worth anything. You’re unique and they’re just blind to see it. Rock on and show them that they’re the ones who are not worth your worrying, anxitey and thoughts! Love you! ❤️

Masterlist | Request

Links - Inspiration song | Dress (in deep red) | Jewelry

When Mick asked me to dress up and meet him in the park close to our house, I can’t lie that it wasn’t a bit confusing. I didn’t remember the date to be anything special really, and I couldn’t get myself to remember if we had anything planned for the day previously. He just got back home for their usual longer summer break between race weekends, which we usually spent laying around in bed for a few days before we felt energized enough to spend time outside the confinement of our home. But now he was up on his feet already on the first day, making us take a walk around the city and as it turns out he had plans for the following days as well. I couldn’t lie, it made me excited but at the same time so confused, about where all of this energy was coming from. Normally I waited with my vacation time off work for him, and only took out days when it was sure that he was going to be free. This meant I was quite busy with work during the remaining days of the year, making me tired and grumpy for the first days I had off in between. It was lucky that on most occasions we had at least a week together, which meant I could lay around lazy for a few days before we would get on with our planned activities. He did surprise me by not letting me just waste a day or two.

My mind started running at the speed of light when I found the little note on our bed, telling me to dress up pretty because he would take me out as soon as he’s gonna be back from his family’s place. I always loved surprises, even more the ones he planned out for us, but knowing we had to go out or it stepped onto a territory that made my anxiety skyrocket. I was never the social type, as I felt content with the group of friends I had since our high-school years. I knew I could trust them and never really tried to meet other people, be it a party or any kind of set up where you had to communicate with strangers. That’s probably why I never really accompanied him to any ceremonies or team parties when I had the chance. It was clear to me that I would just be an anxious mess, and I really didn’t need his friends and colleagues to realise how much Mick and I didn’t match. It was enough when my own brain stood against me and tried to persuade me into believing what we had would never truly work out in the long run. In moments like that I couldn’t even make out how we went from meeting at the beach in Hawaii to today.

° ° °

I didn’t really know how my friends got me to go with them to Hawaii as a summer vacation, and having been here with them for the past half a week I have felt a bit of regret. What was strange that I did enjoy myself and all the plans we had, even if every night I felt like I would rather be home and just relax in my own bedroom, maybe going out with my family for walks or meals at max. That was enough for my social side usually for a whole year. Having people around me 24/7, that tried interacting with me all the time was exhausting. The only thing that made this holiday bearable was that they knew all of this and gave me space when they saw I would need it, but pushed me to take part in the original plan when I was just making up excuses.

Our usual plans consisted of sleeping, eating, going to the beach, taking walks and repeating all four of those activities until our holiday would end. It was usually the beach that I missed out on when I needed a bit of time for myself, but still made sure I spent more time with them than I did alone in our rented house. It would have been a waste of time and money if I didn’t challenge myself a little bit, to be more outgoing. I still wasn’t adventurous enough to for example be in front of them in only a bikini or bathing suit, but I luckily never felt overdressed with my shorts and sleeveless shirts while playing some kind of sports in the sand. Thanks to the boys in our group it was usually football as there were some goals set up in the shade, but we sometimes could get them to play some volleyball too. I probably looked out of place next to all of them wearing their bathing suits or pants and then there I was in full clothing. The only way I could distract myself by only paying attention to the games we played trying to win for our team.

It was maybe our fifth day when we started to see another group of people around our age attending the beach every day. We spent a day just passing each other before one of them challenged us for a volleyball ‘tournament’ and then the next day a football one. It turned into a daily activity and even I was surprised how much I enjoyed it, both the games we played and the conversations we had. They seemed really cool and with several of them I felt like we would be quite good friends outside this holiday. One of them stood out to me even more than the other few guys, by the name of Mick. The girls of course saw it from the outside and I was teased for until the last day when I got myself together and in the end swapped phone numbers with him.

I still didn’t think too much into it, knowing we will probably just forget about even meeting each other. I can still remember how surprised I was when just days after getting back to my usual home routine he texted me, announcing that he’s gonna be in my hometown soon and that he would live to meet up with me. And he didn’t disappoint, going for lunch and a walk around the city with me in just a few weeks time. I can still feel how fast my heart was beating when he revealed to me why he was here and how I felt like a complete fool for thinking he was just a normal kid. I couldn’t have been farther off the truth. That was the first day when I could laugh at my own stupidity whole heartedly, as I couldn’t hold back my embarrassed chuckling at hearing him laugh. If someone told me I’ll get the chance to listen to his laugh almost every day in our future, I would have called them crazy for sure.

° ° °

Putting the little note aside onto the bedside table as I sat down on the mattress, laying back still trying to figure out what he could have planned for us. I was just turning a bit to get my head on my pillow, with my hand sliding under it as I usually liked to sleep when my fingers met with something there that felt like paper. Pulling it out my eyes met with another now purple colored post-it, with his handwriting on it, saying ’It’s gonna be just the two of us, don’t stress about it’ and a little kissy face making me chuckle. He knew me too well and this note showed that he really did think about any possibility so he wouldn’t have to be home to get me out of the house. With a sigh I pushed myself off the bed so I could open up the wardrobe and in a way I knew there would be a twist even before I could see inside. Next to all my usual dresses and blouses hanging under the shelves was another black hanger with a white protector fabric encasing the dress it was probably holding up. The note on it was a simple winky face and I took it out with my head shaking at his antics and how I should have known he would get me something to wear.

I laid it onto our bed, opening up the protector’s zipper and my smile grew wider as my eyes caught the deep red colour of the silk that was hiding under it. Seconds later I was already lifting up the hanger, the dress itself following it flowing through the air with such an ease it made you think it was probably made from it with how light it was. When I turned it around my mind was just about to go into panic mode again at how open the backside was, but the note I discovered stuck to it made me take a deep breath and calm down instantly. ’Remember Hockenheim in 2018?’ I read the words slowly and couldn’t help but smile at the memory it brought up in my mind.

° ° °

When Mick invited me to the Hockenheim GP, the last three races of their season, everyone knew it would be a weekend for celebrations as whatever would have happened he was winning the Championship and no one could stop him. His point advantage put him into a position where not even the driver who was in second place could switch him out, even if they won all three races and Mick would miss out on them. Everything seemed relaxed around his part of the team as everyone knew this last weekend was like a celebratory run for them after all the hard work they put into the season.

The first race wasn’t his best ever but then took second place in both the second and third one, securing his title for the season. As soon as he was out of the car it was all about celebrating both his and the team’s performance. I had the widest grin of my life on my face as we watched him step onto the podium receiving his P2 trophy and then later the one for the Driver’s Championship. It took us three times the usual time to get back to the hotel as everyone was taking pictures with him. Even I got one with him, with which I couldn’t hold back from posting about his achievement. It felt like eternity until we were back at the hotel, and the P2 trophy was still in my hand as we entered his room. I was holding it right until he swept me up into a tight hug and I rather placed it onto the coffee table, before I would drop it.

It wasn’t a surprise when after dinner and a couple of drinks we ended up in the bed together with his shirt already off and mine pushed halfway up my torso when I came to my senses. My mind panicked immediately at all the imagined scenarios coming to me, about him leaving after seeing how I actually look. I was always insecure about my whole body, but mainly my back as my skin there was always full of spots and scarring. The thought of him seeing it freaked me out, don’t even start me on thinking about him touching it. Coming back from my thoughts I took in a shaky but deep breath making him glance at me, pushing himself up a little. I just tried kissing him, to get him to continue but there was worry in his eyes and even though he quickly pecked my lips once again he wasn’t getting back to his previous actions.

“ I’m not going any further until you tell me what got you so out of it. ” He stated, still looking me in the eyes and making me gulp. “ What’s the matter? We don’t have to do anything, there’s no musts here. Just tell me what’s wrong, please. ” He asked again, making me just shake my head as I didn’t trust my voice. I felt like his eyes were boring into me so deep he could see my soul.

“ It’s stupid… but I’m just not… not perfect in any way? ” I finally spoke up, making him furrow his brows in confusion as one of his hands came up to my face to get my hair off my cheek. I knew he was trying to get more info out of me.

“ What isn’t perfect? ” He asked like I just told him something stupid, that doesn’t even exist. I debated telling him or just making a run for it and maybe never talking to him again as anxiety made my throat close up for a second.

“ Everything? Mostly my back. ” I answered him in the end, my next blink lasting longer than usual as I needed a second to compose myself. “ It’s just bumpy and gross. ” I added, not really knowing where my sudden courage came from. When my eyes opened up he was still looking at me but then pushed himself up a little, my hands falling onto my stomach from his sides.

“ Turn around. ” He said, making my heart miss the next beat and my eyes widen. “ Please.” He added with a sigh, sending me a calming smile and my body moved on it’s own sitting up before I turned my back to him. “ Can we take this off? ” I heard his voice as two of his fingers came under the material of my shirt. I was about to shake my head but then it ended up as a nod. If I trusted someone it was him.

After helping me pull my t-shirt off he let me lay back down and I turned my head to the side as it was back on the pillow. Like this I could also see him, giving me the possibility to stop him he was about to do something I wouldn’t have liked. He first just left a little kiss on my cheek, making me smile contently and almost forgetting what was happening, before he went down my neck and my back with his lips. My breath was stuck in my throat until his face came back to mine and I forced some air into my lungs.

“ There’s nothing wrong with you, your body, your back or your skin. Yeah? Nothing wrong. ” He told me again, laying back down next to, with his arm around my waist, pulling me closer. “ The only thing wrong here is the idiot who made you think you’re any less than perfect. ” He added, kissing me and I felt like I would never be able to separate from him. Lucky I wouldn’t have to for at least the next month.

° ° °

As I took the little slip of paper off my fingers ran over the silky fabric, the delicate little chain catching my sight with the sparkling diamonds following each other for the whole length of it. It was a strange jewelry and took me a second to understand it was deliberately placed at the back and not in the front of it. The image inside my head made me gasp as I imagined how it would look on someone and how it would accentuate their back, the shiny metal catching everyone’s glance. Even though my skin was in it’s best ever state I was still quite conscious about it, and made sure most of the time to wear things that I knew would cover any imperfection of it. I knew that his plan with this was to make sure I finally embraced it, how I should have then even back then.

I fought with myself for a bit but then took the dress off the hanger and laid it down onto the bed. I still had to take a shower and do both my makeup and hair. I stayed with the most minimal amount of makeup, mostly focusing on my eyeliner and mascara with some nude colored lipstick that wasn’t far off the original color of my lips. I didn’t spend lots of time on my hair either, letting it flow freely after going through it with a brush and parting it at the usual place. The last step was getting into the dress and zipping it up on the side. When I felt like I had everything with a last check in the full body mirror I was about to change my mind at my reflection when I noticed one more little note from him. ‘You look perfect, don’t question it. Car waiting for you in front of the building.’ There was the time too, when the car would arrive at ours, which was minutes away and with a last sigh I took a thin blazer from the wardrobe before putting on my heels and leaving the house. I locked the door, making sure I won’t be able to get back inside easily, so I couldn’t change my mind.

I didn’t even have to wait a minute longer for a car to park down in front of the exit and I got in without a question when the driver called out my name. I wasn’t even anxious anymore when he restarted the engine, more like excited. So much I felt like I couldn’t sit through our drive. We were waiting at a red light and from my seat I could see the park, which was Mick’s and my favourite place for morning runs or even picnics, making me reach up to my neck, my fingers immediately wrapping around the little pendant that was hanging there on a delicate gold chain.

I remember seeing him crashing into a tyre wall and waiting for him to finally confirm that he was alright. It was the first time since I started watching the races that I saw him getting so close to being hurt and I wasn’t looking forward to any more of these. He probably knew that I would be a bit upset, worried about his well being after realising how dangerous their job actually was. It was just two days later when we were already home and he gave me a little box. It contained a medium sized pendant, quite similar to his. I knew his was from his family, to bring luck to him and I hoped mine would bring some more luck not even just to me but him too. From the moment I put it on, I never took it off again for longer than an hour.

“ We’re here. ” The driver’s voice made me blink away the memory that came up for me, making me turn my head towards him. “ He’s waiting. ” He added with a smile, pointing towards the entrance of the little park that I knew so well.

I quickly thanked him for getting me here before leaving the vehicle and going towards the open gates. We usually just walked by this place and I always found it astonishing as it looked like a fairy land with the lightning all around the place and the pagodas, where people could just sit down and enjoy a cup of coffee or tea with some desserts. However, now it was empty, and the only thing that I could hear was soft music playing in one of the small buildings. Having no clue about where I should go my only hope was following the sound to one of the more hidden pagodas, that was lit up outside even more than the others. I was getting confused and almost giving up when he finally stood up and I could let out a relieved sigh. There was a huge grin on his face, making me smile too although I felt a little embarrassed even though it was only him standing in front of me. I knew he would never give me a reason to feel bad about myself or what I was wearing.

“ You look stunning. ” He came up to me, pulling me into a hug and leaving a kiss on my lips. “ I’m really happy you stayed with the dress. ” He added, making me smile up at him as I initiated another kiss between us, before I let him lead me into the little building.

“ Thank you. This is fabulous as well. I knew it was beautiful, but never thought it’s this cozy. ” I looked around again, not even paying too much attention to him, completely missing him taking my blazer off my shoulder so he could hang it on the wall next to his one.

“ I've wanted to take you here since we first saw it. It was just never the perfect timing. ” He let out a sigh, his hand coming up to my back and it sent a shiver down my spine as the jewelry’s colder chain got in contact with my skin. I knew he saw and maybe even felt it, but never commented on it, deeming it a normal reaction.

“ It would have made it the perfect timing. ” I shrugged a little, sitting down on the chair he pulled out for me, before sitting down opposite me. “ Other than it being too cold to just sit around, I can’t really think about anything that would make me wanna leave early. ” I looked around again. My eyes followed the fairy lights’ cable running all around us and up a tree next to the pagoda.

Having the place for ourselves made it even more magical than how it would normally feel like. Even though we weren’t served by a waitress he had everything we could need, next to the table. He prepared sandwiches with little fruit salads and also our favourite drink. I’m sure we would be having coffee if we were here in the morning, but I also knew we would never sleep if we got caffeine in our systems now. From the outside it probably looked funny as we ate the sandwiches while wearing clothes that would fit into the poshest restaurants but I wouldn’t have changed one bit about tonight. Everything was part of what when considered a perfect date, even if it wouldn’t mean the same for another couple. Everyone’s taste is different and that’s what made it even better, that I could see how much Mick knew my favourite details. I still couldn’t believe what I did to deserve the life I had now and all the changes Mick brought into it by being next to me whenever I would need him and the support.

I was about to thank him for everything, that he made this happen, when he pulled his phone out and I could see as he opened up his camera started recording a video. Instead of lifting it up to record us, he propped it up on the table in a way that it would take in the space next to our pagoda, before standing up and going to the music player that controlled the whole system around the garden. I followed him with my eyes, curiously waiting to hear the song he would choose. I recognised it just two seconds into the start of it, making me not even think about it when he reached out his hand towards me. It was our song, however cliche that is, that we danced to in Hawaii, at the beach party that we attended on the last day of my holiday. Back then I thought we would never ever meet again in person, thought we would be parting ways forever as I had to leave with my friends. It would have been a perfect last memory for the few weeks we spent there, but it became even more magical when there was a text waiting for me to turn on my phone that turned into us talking on the phone constantly and then meeting again in my home town just a few months later.

Even though neither of us was a good dancer we made it work, swaying left and right to the slow beats of the song with my arms around his neck and his circling my hips and resting on the small of my back. I let my eyes close and my head slowly fall forward until my forehead was resting on his shoulder. I felt as he rested his head on mine for a second before his lips left a kiss on my jaw and then neck, followed by several on the skin of my shoulder.

“ This is perfect. ” I sighed out, and I was sure my mum would tease me about how I was beaming with a smile so wide the Cheshire cat could be jealous. I wasn’t ready for it to end and was glad of his choice when the song restarted, meaning the silence didn’t break the moment.

“ What do you think about making our forever this perfect? ” I felt his breath on my neck from his whispering, and I nodded with a smile, not thinking much of it. It was when he stepped back a little and I could see the little box in his hand when my hand came up to cover my surprised expression. “ I know you never thought a silly holiday with friends would end with something like this, but I’m planning on making that just one of the things that worked out quite well in our life. Will you be my partner in making everything better and marry me? ” He asked, already on one knee and opening up the top of the box, revealing a ring that was shining in the light coming from the lanterns and fairy lights.

The only thing I could remember after that was him standing next to me again, the both of us enveloped in a hug while I could already feel the comforting weight of the ring on my finger. The song was still flowing through the air around us, making me feel like I was part of the imaginary world built up inside my head, that I thought would never be my reality. I couldn’t wrap my mind around all the images and thoughts that were running around my head about our future, but feeling his embrace around my body I knew it would all workout. I already had him and that was everything I needed to live my life happy. Or should I say our life now?

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lexa-lives-in-us · 3 years

Note

!!!!!!

May I request a Marion/Dairon snippet of what their future might look like in the undercover au?

The small celebrations turn into a fully fledged party. There is food, and music, and Dairon makes sure to keep an eye on Veth and Yasha for the first hour, because they keep tinkering with the shirt cannon until they are quite sure it's not fit to only throw t-shirts anymore.

But Caleb lures Veth away with the promise of good cocktails, and Yasha is easily distracted when Beau starts to drunkenly dance in the middle of the room.

The kids drink a bit more than what Dairon feels is necessary, and they suddenly feel very old and very boring.

They know they would've done the same at their age, and they also know that, as intoxicated as they are, these kids would probably be able to successfully go out and rob a bank and disappear into the night if it was needed.

So they sit back on the couch and try not to worry.

They sip at their drink, a concoction of something that Caduceus has put together almost casually, and she begins to feel the slight buzz of the alcohol. They're not drunk, not as much as the kids are, but they are positively and happily tipsy.

Marion collapses on the couch next to them, her own drink nearly finished in one hand and a darker shade of red on her cheeks.

Dairon leans back, rolling their neck on the back of the couch, before smiling softly at her.

"Are you happy, my darling?" Marion asks, husky and just slightly slurred.

Dairon chuckles, feeling lighter and more carefree than she's felt in a really long time.

"I am." they murmur, and Marion places her own empty glass on the ground before reaching for them.

Long fingers clasp Dairon's jaw, and Marion's tongue slowly licks Dairon's lips before the woman decides to kiss her.

Dairon melts against the couch, maneuvering themselves to also get rid of their glass and use their free hand to cup Marion's neck.

They make out, a bit sloppily, and Marion grabs their tongue between her teeth and sucks slowly on it until Dairon's hips slightly jerk forward.

An imperceptible movement for everyone else in the room except for Marion.

"Take me to bed." she commands, voice low and dripping with want.

Dairon could not say no if they were sober, and there is absolutely nothing more that they could want right now.

They barely throw a glance to the rest of the room, but Caleb and Caduceus are passed out in their beds, Fjord and Jester are curled up on their own bed and Beau and Yasha are still pressed against one another, slowly dancing at the rhythm of the new song.

No one is going to even notice they're gone.

Dairon gets up, pulling Marion with them, and they barely make it to the room before Marion's hands are digging beyond the hem of Dairon's pants.

They barely manage to close and lock the door behind them before Marion falls to her knees, dragging Dairon's clothing with her.

They barely notice the soft, steady pumping of the music coming from the other room, as Dairon finally pushes Marion onto the mattress and drives themselves into her, fingers curling and searching, their mouths locked in a searing kiss.

***

Veth leaves first, and they wave goodbye to her, Jester and Fjord as they all drive to the airport.

Witnessing Marion hug Jester and hold her closer to her chest, tears threatening to escape, is something Dairon never thought they would want to see.

Marion traces her daughter's face as she stares at her with loving intensity, almost like she's trying to commit it all to memory.

"You be careful, my sweet Sapphire." she tells her, and Jester closes her eyes and leans against her mother's touch.

"You, too, Mama." she says, and if anyone other than Dairon notices her voice shaking, they don't say a word. "I love you. Be happy, yes?"

It's a powerful, charged question, and it almost surprises Dairon when both Marion and Jester turn to glance briefly at them, before Marion whispers "I will."

Dairon feels like they're intruding, but Jester gives her mother one last squeeze before she approaches Dairon to hug them as well.

"Be careful and be happy." Jester repeats, and Dairon closes their eyes for a brief moment, allowing themselves to hold Jester's close for a long moment.

"I will do my best to protect her, Jester." they promise in a whisper, and they feel Jester smile against their shoulder.

"I know, Dairon. I'm not worried at all." she says, and she sounds incredibly sincere.

They watch them go, and only after the car has disappeared past the treeline Marion reaches for Dairon and lets herself cry.

The Nein watch her with dark expressions on their faces.

Dairon holds their lover with their heart breaking in two, and when they catch the somber expression on Beau's face, it shatters even more.

"It never gets any easier." Beau mutters, pulling Yasha against her side to squeeze her closer.

"It never will." Caleb echoes. "Let's get back inside."

***

It takes another day for them to clean up and close the safe house, picking up the equipment they can't leave behind and making sure everything else is undetectable.

Dairon and Marion help however they can, mainly observing the expert movements of these kids who are way too used to uprooting their lives to move them around the globe.

By the time nighttime hits, Beau comes back from driving Caduceus and Caleb to the airport, and then it's just the four of them.

They eat dinner in silence, finishing up all the leftovers Caduceus has saved up for them, and they don't stick around long afterwards.

In the darkness of what has been their room for the past few weeks, Marion places her head on Dairon's chest.

"A lot is going to change."

Dairon frowns.

"A lot has already changed, love." they mutter. "This feels like an avalance that we can't seem to stop."

Marion is quiet for a long moment.

"We'll be fine." she says, and it's determined.

Dairon decides to believe her.

***

They settle in Paris, and it's weird to go back to the same city where they have almost all died.

Dairon settles in Beauregard's safe house, a medium size two-bedroom apartment with a balcony facing the Eiffel Tower.

They raise an eyebrow at Beau and Beau blushes slightly.

"Yasha wanted a place with a view, how could I say no?"

"Whipped." Dairon grins, but before Beau can say anything back, Marion interjects from where she's taken a seat on the queen size bed.

"This bed is too small."

Dairon reply without even thinking about it: "We'll get a bigger one."

To which both Beau and Marion respond with a grin.

Beau backs away from the room to go and find Yasha, miming the sound of a whip hitting target.

***

Life in Paris is surprisingly easy.

As it turns out, Parisians don't really want to interact with tourists, or foreigners in general, and Dairon is more than happy to keep it that way.

They move around the city by foot, and start working with one of Marion's physiotherapists to get their arm back in tip-top shape.

After that, they sign up to a local gym, take personal training lessons to get back into shape and then rent out the studio for their own training classes.

They build their contacts back from scratch, using some of Beau's resources, some of Marion's and some of their own old ones.

Dairon lays low and doesn't make friends.

Not outside the Chateau, at least.

Inside of it, on the other hand, everyone learns who they are, or at least what is essential to know.

Dairon is Marion's lover. They are not a famous companion, they are not a VIP, they are not a well paying client. They are the person who gets to ask for Marion at any moment of the day and they get to know every single one of Marion's movement.

Marion Lavorre is very adamant of the fact that Dairon is to be allowed to handle the place as if they were Marion herself, and after Dairon slams one of the door security guards and lifts them against the wall with their good hand on the first week for trying to make fun of them and their relationship with Ms. Lavorre, nobody dares saying or doing anything ever.

Dairon and Bluud, the security guard, actually end up becoming pretty good friends, to a point where he invites them over to the Chateau gym to spar with him and the others on the security team.

Dairon learns every nook and corner of the Chateau, and they stop by at least once a day to either greet Marion with a good morning kiss, bid her goodnight with an evening one, or simply have a meal break with her.

Sometimes, Marion would drag them down with her eyes still half closed with sleep. She would kiss them with closed lips, always very self conscious about her morning breath, and she would snuggle closer to Dairon's chest until they both doze off to sleep.

Sometimes, Marion would wait for them at the end of the day with a bottle of fine wine and freshly baked goods from the kitchen and they would chat, sitting on the outdoor chairs on the balcony, telling each other about their days.

"Does it ever bother you, what I do?" Marion asks, almost every day for the first few weeks.

"No, it truly doesn't." Dairon responds in honesty. "I trust you, and I know you enjoy what you do. You love it, and I love you."

It comes easier and easier, to say those few words.

Marion always smiles and doesn't respond, kissing them instead.

Sometimes, Dairon would come back to their own place after a long day of sneaking around to find Marion already sitting on their bed, with her long hair draped around her shoulders and a pair of jeans and a shirt that would remind Dairon of different times.

Dairon would then press her against the mattress and claim her as theirs, kissing every inch of Marion's body to make her shiver.

"My darling." Marion would whisper, body arched in pleasure, nails scraping the back of Dairon's head clutched between her thighs. "My Dairon."

Sometimes, Dairon would drop on the mattress face first, and Marion would be the one taking care of them in the way Dairon would mostly need on the day.

"I was made for loving you." Marion tells them on the day of their sixth month anniversary.

Dairon's breath catches in their throat.

"You're a dangerous woman, Marion Lavorre." Dairon responds. "You make me want to do dangerous things."

Marion giggles, hand caressing the top of Dairon's head, looking absolutely stunning above them, naked body barely illuminated by the moonlight coming through the open window.

Sometimes, they would talk about their jobs.

"What do you want to do?" Marion would ask regularly, and Dairon updates her on their progresses, on what they built and what they discovered.

They both keep in touch with the Nein, and Dairon secretly picks up Jester at the airport to then show up at the Chateau's doors with her in tow, surprising the hell out of Marion.

Dairon receives a similar visit from Beauregard as they walk to their usual table at the Chateau's restaurant, finding their adopted-like daughter sitting comfortably with Yasha at her side and Marion grinning like a madwoman in front of them.

They are leisure and business visits at the same time, because shop talk is inevitable when they're all spies, but Marion never seems to mind.

They are all making good way with their leads on the Angels of Iron, and Dairon and Marion are constantly reassured that Marion is still safe since the Gentleman has left town and found refuge in Turkey, and Dairon sighs in relief every time Beau confirms no one seems to suspect they're actually still alive.

"We still don't have enough information to close in on them." Beau tells them one time, on a rare occasion where Jester, Fjord, Beau and Yasha all manage to find themselves in Paris at the same time.

Dairon nods, and Marion simply waves for another bottle of wine.

"Soon, my darling child." Marion promises, and Beau smiles gently at her. Dairon knows the kid way too well to not notice the way Beau's shoulder seem to lose a bit of tension every time Marion acts to motherly towards her.

Dairon wraps their arm around Marion's waist as they wave goodbye at the four kids from their balcony at the Chateau.

Beau and Yasha walk hand in hand in the middle of the Parisian street, followed by a dancing Jester and a laughing Fjord.

"Did you ever think we were going to adopt all of them, one day?" Dairon half-jokes, and Marion giggles, hiding her face in Dairon's neck. When she's not wearing heels, she's much shorter than them.

"Never." she admits. "Not that I mind."

"Having seven unhinged young-adults to look after?"

The moon reflects in Marion's eyes when she turns to look at them.

"Being a parent with you." she says, bluntly, honestly, and Dairon's jaw drops.

"Flies don't make a good snack, darling." Marion chuckles, placing two fingers under Dairon's chin to force their mouth closed. Once it does, she presses a quick kiss to their lips.

"Are you implying...?"

Marion shrugs, snuggling closer and looking out towards a half asleep Paris.

It's been almost thirteen months, and yet Dairon doesn't think they could ever get used to that view.

"I'm not implying anything." Marion murmurs. "I'm just putting ideas into the universe for the future. I have no interest in bearing a child, my darling, nor, I assume, do you."

Marion shrugs, her hand lazily caressing Dairon's chest.

"We lead dangerous lives. That much is true. We are far from being safe, and even once the A of I are out of the picture I doubt you would just... Retire from the scene."

Dairon thinks about it for a brief moment, then nods.

"I don't think I ever wanted to, no." they confirm.

Marion hums, like she wasn't expecting anything different.

"Precisely. No, I'm not talking about a baby." Dairon feels her smiling against her shoulder. "Maybe a teen. Someone we can help and rescue. Someone who just needs a roof, a family, and who should not grow out of the system."

Dairon's shoulders tense. The wording feels way too specific.

"Who told you?" they murmur, without any real anger behind their words. Only the usual, instinctual response of a past that will never stop haunting them.

"Fjord." Marion admits freely. "He also grew out of the system, and he mentioned you might as well. He is pretty good at picking up these things, I must say. My daughter is lucky to have him."

Dairon swallows, feeling their throat very dry, all of a sudden.

"Not even Beauregard knows, I don't think." they murmur after a while.

"I would never tell her." Marion promises, and Dairon believes her.

"I never really thought I would be a parent." Dairon whispers, eyes fixated on the horizon. If they focus hard enough, they might be able to spot the minuscule dots that are Beauregard and Yasha walking away.

"And yet..."

"And yet, that obnoxious child has plummeted in my life when I least expected it." Dairon grunts, making Marion laugh.

"Darling Beau is not obnoxious, Dairon." she pokes at them. "She is much more similar to you than you would ever like to admit, so if anything, she's just as obnoxious as you."

Dairon scoffs, but they can't hide the laugh behind it.

"You are impossible."

Marion hums in agreement.

For the longest time, silence hangs comfortably between them.

The gentle breeze envelopes them, and Marion's evening dress floats gently with it. Marion hides her face in Dairon's neck and Dairon presses a kiss on the top of her head.

Finally, a smile tugs at their lips.

"A teenager will be a lot of work." they murmur. "But I think we'll handle it."

Marion's breath itches, and the woman presses her face against Dairon's skin.

"Oh, my love..."

#cobalt ruby #spy au #undercover au #eheh #critical role art #marion lavorre #dairon #dairon x marion #beau x dairon #beauyasha

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atomic-taco-muffin · 3 years

Text

Xigbar x Fem!Reader: Contemptress

Request from @wideeyedkatiedid: If it’s not too much trouble to ask would you be willing to write a nsfw Xig fem!reader inspired by Contemptress? Probs saw that one coming lol! If not that’s ok! It’ll just have to live rent free in my noggin lol

Why did this song give me Resident Evil 8 Vibes?!

Warnings: Dom!Xig and switch!reader, edging, squirting

Rating: NSFW under the cut

Xigbar sat in a bar in Traverse Town, just minding his own business when he spotted you from across the bar. He smirked and asked the waiter to send you a drink. The waiter gave you your drink and you looked at him confused.

“I didn’t order this,” you said.

“It’s from that guy over there,” the waiter said. You looked over and saw Xigbar sitting there looking at you. You scoffed and took a sip of the drink he gave you.

“Playing hard to get, I see. Well then, let’s play,” he said to himself. He walked over to you and sat down.

“So, what’s a pretty girl like you doing here?” he asked.

“What’s a contemptress like you doing here?” you asked.

“Contemptress? Is that what you think of me?”

“Oh please. I know your type. You’re not that slick.”

“Well, what if told you that I planned this? What if I want to lose control? What if I take the blame and become the drug and dissolve as you swallow?” You pulled out a card that had your address on it and handed it to him.

“My place. 5 minutes,” you said and walked away. Xig smirked and took a swig of his drink. He walked out of the bar and headed over to your place. He knocked on your door, already feeling a boner form in his pants. The door opened revealing you in a sexy lingerie set.

“Come here, you,” he said. He pulled you into a kiss and the two of you made out in your apartment. You pushed him onto the couch and tried to take his jacket off.

“The hell is this?” you asked, frustrated.

“Can’t blame me, dollface,” he said.

“I most certainly can.” You finally took his jacket off and just before you were gonna take his pants off he stopped you.

“Nice try, sweetheart. If we’re gonna do this, we’re doing this my way,” he said.

“Well, if that’s the case then, you can leave,” you said. Xigbar growled and pinned you to the couch.

“Wanna try that again, brat?” he asked. You wrapped your legs around his waist and flipped positions.

“I think you’re the brat here,” you said.

“As if! I know how to take care of women like you and it looks to me, you need a lesson,” he said. He cupped your clothed cunt, making your breath hitch.

“Heh, looks like you want this really badly, huh?” he teased.

“M-maybe,” you stuttered. He smirked and flipped positions.

“Want me to take care of you?” he smirked.

“Y-yeah,” you whimpered. He took your lingerie off and started teasing your clit with his thumb.

“Ngh~! Stop teasing me~!” you whined. He chuckled darkly and pulled away. He took off his belt and tied your hands with it. He took his pants off, revealing his fat cock.

“Like what you see, dollface?” he teased. You nodded and squirmed underneath him. He smirked again and pushed himself inside you. You squealed feeling his fat cock enter you.

“Shit, you’re so fucking tight!” he groaned. He started moving in and out of you at a fast pace, making you moan and squeal at the feeling. Xig could tell how close you were and stopped moving.

“Why the hell did you stop?!” you whined.

“I want you to beg for me to let you cum. Afterall, I did say that we’re doing this my way,” he said.

“Fuck, please~! Please let me cum, it hurts so bad~!”

“There we go. Good girl.” He started moving again and you could feel your orgasm approaching again. Xig placed his thumb on your clit and started rubbing it.

“Fuck, ‘m gonna cum~!” you moaned.

“Cum for me, baby. Make a mess all over me,” he groaned. You squealed as you squirted all over his chest and your stomach.

“Fuck, that’s a good girl,” he moaned. He pulled out and came all over your chest and stomach. The two of you panted as you fell limp on the couch.

“Round two in the shower?” he asked.

“You’re impossible,” you smiled. He picked you up and took you to the shower for round two.

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softyoongiionly · 5 years

Text

NSFW A-Z List (Mama Mia! Jungkook)

***This contains smut, 18+ only please***

“Aqua told me you all had some questions for me so, I had my assistant fax me the prompt and, I’m really hoping she didn’t read it because, these are filthy ha. I hope you all enjoy yourselves.”

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex):

“It kind of depends on the situation but, if I just had sex, I’m in a good mood. If Y/N and I are in the bed, I make sure I change the sheets and, I make sure she’s cleaned up and, feeling good too. Sometimes we like to talk about it. A bit of pillow talk is always great. PILLOWW TALK! Do you guys remember that song by that one dude in one direction? Great song. It’s like he left one direction and, immediately needed to say the word fuck and sing about sex.”

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s):

“This is a weird question. I like my abs? I guess? I mean I spent like a million hours in the gym trying to tone up and stuff so, it’s definitely the only thing that stands out.”

“Y/N is the by far the most beautiful woman on the planet so, it’s a little hard to pin point one specific part of her I like the most. If I had to choose, I would say her eyes. Sometimes she looks at me and, I suddenly forget all three languages I speak. She takes my breath away. Literally, who is she looking at like that? Me? Does she value my life at all? Is she trying to kill me? Probably. I love her :-)”

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person):

“Cum...I don’t really know what I’m supposed to talk about in this section so, I’m just gonna say- yes?? Is that the right answer?”

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs):

“One time, when Y/N was away on business, I jerked off so much in one day, I sprained my hand. I guess that isn’t dirty but, it is embarrassing. I’d probably do it again though, I’m so spoiled that I forgot what’s its like to go without sex.”

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?):

“Yikes this question is a little hard for me to answer. Before meeting Y/N, I had a lot of different partners. After finding out my half-brother tried to steal my recipe, I got really down on myself. I felt really empty and, I spent a lot of time partying and, hooking up with random people. I don’t really know how many if I’m being honest. It was a lot though. After awhile I kind of snapped out of it and, realized I needed to deal with my issues head on so, after a bit of therapy, I was doing a lot better. Sexually, I’ve had a lot of experience but, intimacy? That’s a lot newer for me. And let me tell you my dudes, nothing is sexier than being with someone who truly loves and cares for you. I don’t make the rules.”

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual):

“Missionary. Listen, I know it’s a boring answer but, I’m a sucker for passion what can I say? I like watching her face and, seeing all the little expressions she makes, especially right when I first push inside of her. Also, it’s the best position for her to scratch up my back and, I really love when she does that.”

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc):

“I don’t really find a lot of things to laugh about during sex but, I’m sure it’s happened at some point. Sex is kind of a serious thing for me now but, I wouldn’t stay serious if something funny happened because, sometimes funny things do happen. When they do, we laugh but, then I’m right back in the moment again. Y/N and I mess around a lot in our daily lives so, I like to use sex as a way to show her how serious I am about her and, our relationship.”

H = Hair (How well-groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.):

“I got laser hair removal like 3 years ago. Yes, it’s possible to get it done in sensitive areas but, it’s crazy expensive. Or so I’ve heard, I’m not gonna lie to you, my idea of expensive and, other people’s idea of expensive are probably a little different. But yeah, I got it all lasered off so, it doesn’t really grow there anymore. I keep my face shaved too but, my arms and legs are free to grow all the hair they want.”

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…):

“With Y/N, I’m a little bit of a hopeless romantic, I can’t lie. I love all of that cheesy shit. Rose petals on the bed? Yes. Wine and chocolate on the shores of our private beach? At least twice a week. Leaving Y/N little post it notes all over our villa that contain all the things I love about her? Duh. I AM A SAP. I AM A MESS. I can’t help myself. My father collects first edition classic novels and, for Valentine’s Day, I had him send me the contact of his distributor so, I could buy Y/N the first edition of The Princess Bride. It’s one of her favorites. It was only $1,400 so, I definitely got a good deal. I also had a custom gown imported from France and, a prince-like outfit made for me. What do princes even wear? What is that called? Tights? I don’t know but, I looked like a goddamn Disney prince by the time I was done getting ready. I rented a different villa out for the weekend and, my interior designer decorated it like a medieval castle. We spent the weekend playing prince and princess and, it was probably one of the best weekends of my life. So to answer your question: Yes, I am romantic.”

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon):

“I only really touch myself when Y/N is away. Her and I have a pretty consistent sex life so, we have sex almost every day, sometimes multiple times a day. I don’t really have a need for it anymore and, it doesn’t feel nearly as good as sex with Y/N.”

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks):

“I have a few. I’m really sensitive to smells so, if Y/N smells good, I can’t keep my hands off of her. She has this one perfume from Gucci that I love so much. I can get hard just from the smell; it’s kind of pathetic honestly. I love having sex outside too. It’s a good thing we have a private strip of the beach because, if we had neighbors nearby, they would hate us ha. I have a cashmere picnic blanket that we take down there a few times a week and, we always end up making love on it. Yes, I said making love. Get over it. Oh and, if Y/N says anything about my muscles or how strong I am? Instant turn on. I think I have a praise kink? Is that what it’s called? I love Y/N’s panties too. Lace, silk, cotton, clean or dirty; I don’t discriminate, just put them in my mouth. Lol, this is getting dirty…sorry Aqua.”

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do):

“I already kind of answered this but, sex on the beach or sex on our balcony are probably my top two.”

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going):

“I feel like I answered this one too because, I just talked about my kinks but, I would say my motivation is to get my girl off right? I get off easily. I have a beautiful woman all over me, saying dirty things in my ear… I mean, my orgasm is guaranteed. Y/N doesn’t take a long time to cum anymore because; I know how to please my woman but, I still want her to feel good. I want to see her let go and, let someone else take care of her for a change. She works so hard. I want to show her what a good woman she is. I want to show her how much I love her.”

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs):

“Threesomes, anal and, I’m pretty sure this is everyone’s answer but, bodily fluids belong in the toilet.”

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc):

“Yes.”

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? Etc.):

“Both. Sometimes I want to draw it out and, let her feel every inch of me but, sometimes I want to fuck so hard we are both sore the next day. It’s all amazing either way.”

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.):

“I love quickies. They are great in the afternoon when she and I have things to do but, we still want each other. They would get old after a while though so, we usually do both. It’s very rare that we just have a quickie and, nothing else but, sometimes it happens. Ever since we moved to Greece, we try to always make time for each other but, we both get busy from time to time.”

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.):

“I’m game to experiment a little bit but, Y/N and I have been together awhile. We’ve tried a few different things but, sex with her is so amazing, I don’t feel the need to experiment that much anymore.”

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…):

“I can last forever if I need to. Like I said, my orgasm is an easy thing to obtain with a woman like Y/N so, my focus is making sure she’s feeling it too. I can go for multiple rounds too, I mean it’s hard not to. Have you seen her? We have sex all night sometimes. I hope she finishes her conference call soon, I’m really starting to miss her…”

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?):

“Y/N owns a very tasteful collection of dildos made out of rose quartz and jade. I use them on her sometimes between rounds but, I don’t know how often she uses them beyond that. I don’t own any toys but, I do spend quite a bit of money on new lingerie for Y/N. She has an entire armoire for all of her outfits. Oh, we have gold handcuffs too. We take turns using them on each other.”

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease):

“Y/N has a really sensitive spot on her neck and, she’s really tender around her waist so, sometimes I come up beyond her and, brush my lips against her throat and, tickle her. She’s told me it turns her on immediately so, I like to play with her a little bit. We both tease each other a lot though, especially during phone meetings. One time, I was on a 4 way call with my investors and, she sucked my dick through the entire thing. I thought I was gonna have a heart attack but, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t cum a little harder that time. Maybe that’s another kink of mine…”

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make):

“We live on a private piece of land so; we can be as loud as we want. I’m only loud when things are getting intense but, even still I’m not screaming at the top of my lungs. She isn’t crazy loud either but, I do try my hardest to get her to scream my name every now and again. Just for fun.”

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice):

“Y/N and I are in the process of buying an island in the Caribbean and, sometimes I get turned on when she talks about how much money we both have. I’m sorry, I know it’s a dick move but, it’s the truth. I donate millions to charity every year, I swear.”

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words):

“I’m like 7 inches I think? When I’m hard it’s probably like 8 or 9. I’m not sharing any more than that ha.”

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?):

“Pretty high. Unless I’m really sick or really busy.”

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards):

“If we’ve been going for multiple rounds, I’m pretty exhausted by the end of it but, I don’t just fall asleep. I don’t want to leave the bed afterwards though. I just want to cuddle with Y/N until we both pass out. If it’s during the day and, we’ve only gone once or twice, I’m not tired at all.”

“Aqua wanted me to dedicate this to @gldnrecs and, @bulletproofbirdy. She says you guys are the best and, apparently you have a sweet spot for me. So, I guess I’ll dedicate this to you too ha. I hope you liked it.”

#jungkook smut #bts smut #jungkook #bts jungkook #mama mia!#A-Z: Mama Mia! Jungkook #smutcentralnet #bts scenarios #bts reactions

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lucas-koh · 4 years

Text

Stitches - Bryce Lahela x MC II

Also uploaded to Ao3! Go check it out there if you’d like my user is margotmuses

Doesn’t follow canon, but elements of canon. FWB.

Song: Feel Real - Deptford Goth

Rating: M

Word Count: 3409

Please check out chapter one first if you haven’t already!

Taglist: @lahellacute @tyrilsnightbloom @bubblelaureno

Chapter Two: Suki’s Flip-Flop, Intensive, Very Long Day

On a pretty big whim, Sienna, Jackie, Aurora, and Elijah had decided to look at apartments and move in together on the walk home from Donahue’s. Turned out none of their current living situations were ideal, and as crazy as it sounded, Suki felt like this might just work out. Weirder stuff had happened, right? She’d lived with complete strangers in college, so this was no huge thing, really. Over the following week they scored themselves an absolute bargain of a stunning top level apartment which overlooked the classic Boston skyline. Somehow, they’d managed to convince the landlord to rent to them for cheap, and soon enough everyone started to move their stuff in.

To celebrate their gorgeous new apartment, the group decided that they would throw a housewarming party at some point in the next few weeks. Planning was immense - everyone wanted to do something different, plus finding time where everyone would be off work was difficult. Elijah had never thrown a house party before, so he was overlooking most of the planning, while Sienna and Suki did tasks such as stocking up on cheap booze. Aurora didn’t really want to get involved in the planning side of things, too focused on her studies, but was looking forward to the party all the same. She was crazy grateful to be able to move away from her overbearing aunt. Jackie also wasn’t so involved in the planning, but more out of lack of interest in making plans. After a week or so, they’d decided on a date. All that was left to do was to invite everyone. And, yeah, that pretty much meant everyone.

Suki’s mind had been pretty occupied, mostly by a certain sun-kissed surgeon who’d swayed her to The Stone Roses. Since that first night, Suki had only seen Bryce in passing in the corridors, always taking lunch breaks and the like at different times due to the different demands of their jobs. He’d wink or grin at her and for a moment she’d be completely focused on only that. Not to mention the all-consuming sexual chemistry they had with each other being sparked each time they merely passed by one another. She was continuously bothered by the strange familiar feeling she felt with him, increasingly frustrated that she couldn’t pin it down.

About two and a half weeks in, Suki was suffering from an absolutely awful day. None of her patients were looking at a positive outcome, and she was feeling utterly helpless about it all. Existentialism: Doctor’s edition. She’d shut herself away in a supply closet to be alone with her thoughts. And to cry. What good was being doctor if you couldn’t save lives? And everything felt like a minefield. One wrong move and it could all implode. Misdiagnoses were so easy to make and so incredibly dangerous, she could prescribe someone a medicine they were allergic to and make their symptoms broaden, or even just upsetting someone because there was nothing she could do. She worried she wasn’t ready for this job. It was all very well reading up about illnesses and treatments, but actually putting it into practice? Dealing with real life people? So incredibly intimidating.

Abruptly the door creaked open and Suki jumped back.

“Oh! Sorry, I didn’t… think anyone was in here.” It was Bryce. Of course it was. He looked just as good as ever, framed in the dark by the light from the hall. “I just needed to get some suture kits...”

“It’s fine, just shut the door,” her voice cloyed but she tried to subtly wipe the tears from her eyes.

He did as she asked and came closer towards her. Even though it was dark, he noticed the red rings round her eyes and wet cheeks.

“Hey, hey. What’s going on?” His voice was soothing and gentle, his usual cocky demeanours put on a shelf.

“It’s just… I feel like I have too much power. I pretty much get to decide who lives or dies. I get to decide which words to use to ruin someone’s life I-“ she couldn’t help it as the tears began to pour out again. She wasn’t sure why she was baring her soul to Bryce, but something in her knew he would know what to say. He stood and listened, watching patiently. Bryce stepped in so he was closer to Suki.

“If I tell someone I’ll save their life, but I can’t, how am I supposed to live with myself? How do I tell a parent their six-year-old will never see it to seven? Bryce…” she continued, her eyes were wide and glassy as she stared up at him. Hearing her say his name like that stirred something in Bryce he wasn’t quite comfortable admitting.

“I know. But you’re damn good at your job, Suki. If you tell someone you’ll save their life, and you do, how do you not believe in yourself? How do you tell an old man he’s in remission? There are so many good parts to this job. It’s hard as shit, yeah, but we knew that. It was never going to be easy.” He lifted up his free hand and ran his thumb softly along her eyes to clear her tears.

“But it’s my fault. If I fail a patient... Maybe I shouldn’t be here.”

He laughed a brief hearty chuckle. “You made It through med school, climbed your way to the top of the medical interns at Edenbrook, and you really think you’re in the wrong place? I’ve seen those rankings, Moore. You’re good crop.”

She gave him a lopsided smile. His confidence had a way of rubbing off on her.

“Every doctor has their moment of doubt. It’ll pass.” He continued.

“How do you do it?”

He shrugged. “I just know I’m damn good at what I do. It’s still early days, Suki. Just let it come and go.”

She nodded and felt the desire to hug him. Lucky for her, he held his arms out to her and she collided with his hard chest, again. She still had her arms crossed in front of her, but moved to cradle her head into the crook of his neck, shifting her body so she was leaning into him. Bryce’s arms enveloped her, like a large, hard, teddy. She felt like a baby, cocooned and cooed at by the light soothing motion Bryce was drawing down her back. It felt like the most natural thing.

“Shit. I guess you are damn good at what you do,” she said. Her voice was muffled by Bryce’s scrub top, but he heard her all the same, and couldn’t help but grin at the girl in his arms.

“I told you, I’m a talented guy.”

She pulled her head back after a minute, looking up into his brown eyes, which were honey like his skin usually, but deep and alluring in the dimmed light of the supply closet. His arms still cradled her.

She suddenly wanted to tangle her fingers into his hair and kiss him passionately. Because despite the snark, the ego, the cockiness, he’d made her feel better after an incredibly difficult day. And there was definitely something scandalous about being in a supply closet together. The thick sexual tension that had been whirring for two weeks now was at an all time high. Her eyes flirted down to his plump lips, still ghosted with a smile. Her heart was pumping right out of her chest, she was surprised he couldn’t feel it against his own. The chemistry could be cut with a knife. She tightened her arms around herself as she made the flash decision. Without giving him too much time to back out, Suki swiftly moved forward and pressed her lips to his.

He hesitated at first, still as stone, giving Suki a moment to freak out – shit, he doesn’t want to be doing this. I made the wrong call - before he pushed his lips back into hers with fervent want. They reacted to each other like it was something that had been simmering for way longer than just two and half weeks. Their mouths clambered almost clumsily around each other. Bryce’s hands moved up her back and to her neck with a caress, before he steered her round and pushed her up against the shelves. A few bits of equipment fell down, but they didn’t care. Suki pulled him as close to her as she could, hands gripping his waist. She could feel his muscles move under her fingers as they kissed, which sent a jolt through her stomach. She was actually kissing him. For some reason, the idea felt unattainable and the fact that it was happening felt fantastical.

His lips were soft but applied pressure, his tongue demanding and dominating. Suki let out an unintentional moan, causing a gruff noise from Bryce’s throat, and she could feel him smiling against her lips. Caught up in the passion of the moment, and wanting to savour every part of this, Suki lifted up a leg and wrapped it around Bryce’s hip. He responded by pressing his body tighter against hers and removing a hand from her neck to support her leg, copping a feel of her backside on the way there.

Suki didn’t even care that the shelves were digging into her back. All she cared about in that moment was getting as much as she could out of Bryce. Because, god, was he hot. His kisses were practised and skilled, clearly something he’d done a lot. She pulled him closer towards her, and he removed his lips from hers to burrow his face into her neck and suck at that sweet spot. She gasped at the sensation, earning a cocky chuckle from Bryce. If he gave her a hickey, she was dead.

To avoid that possibility, she pulled his face from her neck to meet her lips again, deepening the kiss, and finally threading her fingers through his floppy hair in the way she’d wanted to before.

A loud creak and unexpected light falling on her shut eyelids indicated that the door had been opened. Suki opened her eyes wide and looked over to the door to see an older Doctor. Oh god. She knew this guy. Dr Zaid Mirani – her attending. The leg which had been round Bryce’s hip dropped immediately.

“Can you give us a minute?” Bryce asked, frustrated, eyes shut and forehead against Suki’s, not giving a single shit that they’d just been caught in the act, not even bothering to see who it was.

“I need some scissors. Don’t let me stop you,” Zaid snapped.

At this, Bryce sighed and stepped away from Suki. Suki tried turning away coyly so that Zaid didn’t see her face, moving away from the shelves to give him access. There was a deafening awkward silence as Zaid rummaged through the shelves to find what he needed, Suki looking anywhere but at either of the men in the room. Bryce’s eyes watched her, flattening her hair down on her head and smoothing down her clothes.

After what felt like far too long, Zaid left without a word. The door shut behind him and Bryce and Suki were sent back into dim light. She looked over to Bryce finally, who was leaning against a cupboard with his hands in his pockets, a humorous smile playing on his lips. Even in the dark he looked good, hair ruffled from her fingers and lips swollen from relentless kissing. Ah, shit. He looked so good. Unlike Suki, he hadn’t taken the time to refine his appearance. But, she kind of liked it that way.

“That kinda killed the mood,” he said, pushing off the cupboard.

“…yeah. We should get back to work, anyway,” replied Suki. She was hot from embarrassment, again. This boy sure knew how to get her flustered, both unintentionally and intentionally. That kiss sure had some intention behind it. It had been a nice distraction, and admittedly she felt much better, but it was time to get back to reality.

He chuckled and scratched his thumb over his chin. He didn’t seem embarrassed at all. Then again, asking a resident to leave so they could continue their steamy make-out didn’t strike Suki as something someone who was easily embarrassed would do. Unluckily for her, Suki was a stickler for humiliation. Maybe hooking up with Dr Bryce No-Fear wasn’t something a blubbering blushing mess should repeat.

Bryce walked toward Suki, and she almost jumped back, worried he might try again. For a couple of reasons: worried they’d be caught again, and Suki would never live it down with herself, but also worried she wouldn’t be able to stop at a sensible place. He was too sexy, and too experienced. But he reached behind Suki to grab a suture kit. The whole reason he’d even been here in the first place. He held it up to show her, before making his way to the door.

“You’ll kill it out there, Dr. Moore,” he reassured before opening the door, letting the light flood the room again, and shutting it behind him once again leaving Suki in the dimness.

She crept out of the supply closet, not looking where she was going and accidentally ramming straight into Jackie.

“You look a mess!” Jackie laughed, noting Suki’s scruffed up hair and creased scrubs.

Suki cursed herself internally as she once again started to sweat.

“Oh! Long day, is all. I’m only halfway through, too!”

Jackie side-eyed her blustery response. “I’ve got to get this shot to this patient. You’re lucky this time, Moore.”

—-

A couple of hours later, Suki was finally grabbing a bite to eat when she received a page from Aurora.

Suki rushed into the room, where Aurora was already debriefing the resident. Shit. It was Zaid. She prayed that he hadn’t caught her face before, that it had been too dark and she’d turned away quick enough that he hadn’t recognised her.

“Hey, Aurora. What’s the situation?” She breathed out, exhausted from speeding up there. Aurora looked grateful as she turned to Suki.

“Moore,” Zaid greeted tightly. Something told her that he had definitely seen her face earlier. He didn’t seem like the type to bring it up, though.

“Ms. Redford was admitted for a broken neck, but her blood work looks incredibly strange…”

—-

“So, Dr Mirani’s a pretty grumpy guy, but why do I feel like there was a reason he was short with you earlier?” Aurora asked as the walked down the corridor to their next patient. Damn her for being smart and perceptive.

Suki weighed up whether or not to tell Aurora. It might be quite nice to have someone on her side, to tell all the awkward stories. She hadn’t done the whole secret make-out since college, and back then, she had a roommate to gossip about it with. At the end of the day Suki still barely knew Aurora; sure, they lived together, but they hardly even had a chance to be at the apartment together with their different shifts and the like. And when they weren’t at work, they were sleeping or eating. Maybe that meant telling her would feel like less of a big deal? Then again, even the idea of saying it was making her cringe. Plus, Aurora was great but she might not be too impressed that Suki had been taking time out of work to make-out with a surgical intern. In a supply closet which anyone could walk in on. And, had walked in on. A senior attending. She decided against it.

“I don’t know. I just don’t think he likes me much,” she wasn’t a very good liar, which Aurora seemed to glean; but she didn’t push further.

—-

After what felt like the most exhausting day ever - having difficult patients, a mental breakdown in a supply closet, a hot make out session in the same supply closet, being caught by her attending, and then having hours more of gruelling work – Suki threw herself onto her bed dramatically. It felt like her whole body, including her internal organs, was on fire. She eventually got up to change into her pyjamas, clean her face, and brush her teeth. There was a knock on her door. She opened it to reveal it was Elijah.

“Hey, what’s up?” He asked, it looked like he’d been home a while. Suki was happy to see him nonetheless.

“Just winding down after work, you know.”

“Yeah, today was a long one,” he added awkwardly.

“Tell me about it.”

He seemed like there was something he knew, or wanted to say, but didn’t.

“Movie?” Elijah asked.

“Sure, I might pass out though.”

She followed Elijah to the sofa and let him load up Netflix. She pulled off the fluffy blanket from the arm and snuggled into the crook of the sofa, next to Elijah’s chair. They put on a classic romcom and settled in to watch it, everyone else either asleep or working. Suki and her other roommates had become close quickly, but she still felt she wanted to bond more with them, get to know them better. She truly loved each one of them, and they each had their own personal qualities which enriched the group.

“So-“ Elijah finally came out with about a quarter of the way in, only to turn and see Suki had passed out.

Elijah tucked her in on the sofa and shut the TV off so she wouldn’t be disturbed. He would have to talk to her again another time. He wheeled away into his own bedroom.

—-

Around an hour later, Suki woke with a stir, taking a moment to recognise her surroundings. She must’ve fallen asleep here, and she noticed how she was tucked into the blanket. Elijah. How was she ever going to bond more with her flat mates If she couldn’t even stay awake to watch a movie with them? She sighed, folding up the blanket to place on the sofa arm again, and made her way into her own bed.

In the dark of the night, Suki’s thoughts wandered to Bryce’s lips on hers, his hands on her neck, his lips on her neck, his body close to hers…

She thought about that smirk and that laugh, the way his hair felt under her fingers, his taut stomach muscles under her hands. The way he tasted clean, faintly minty, the smoothness of his lips on her own. The feeling of her leg wrapped round his hip. If Zaid hadn’t interrupted when he had, Suki wasn’t sure she would’ve been able to stop. Truthfully, it had been a while since she’d slept with anyone, and a while since she’d actually been so sexually attracted to someone.

But she tried not to think about it. He’d helped her out of a tight spot earlier, and she’d thanked him. Now, she would have to put in all her effort to be a better doctor. Not try to sleep with the other interns. No matter how sexy their body and face and demeanour was. She wondered why he’d been so kind to her, taken the time to reassure her and validate her thought. Perhaps just a ploy to get that kiss, or something more, but Suki wasn’t really sure she cared if it had been. Even so, he’d seemed genuine. She supposed he was a doctor after all, helping people was second nature to him.

Come to think of it, the way they’d kissed in the supply closet struck that odd feeling in her again. How did she know him? Did he know her? Was she just superimposing someone else on to him to make him more appealing to her carnal desires and more of a mystery to solve? Maybe it was that if she let herself get hung up in this completely farcical idea, she could ignore what she was really thinking about deep down: her failures as a doctor.

So, maybe she didn’t know Bryce at all. She just liked how he looked and wanted there to be something. They say if you desire something, it pops up everywhere. So, those feelings of déjà vu, maybe they were all in her head. Or maybe she was just spiralling, after the ridiculously lengthy and eventful day. Her eyelids started to drop unintentionally. Maybe she would think about this tomorrow, instead…

#bryce lahela #open heart #open heart fanfiction #bryce lahela fanfiction #bryce x mc #playchoices open heart #open heart fic #oph spoilers #choices open heart #oph #choices: open heart #open heart fanfic #choices fanfiction #choices #choices: stories you play #bryce lahela x mc #dr bryce lahela #bryce Lahela fic

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regrettablewritings · 4 years

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Preferences: Guilty Pleasures

Characters: Okoye, Lucifer Morningstar, Dewey Finn, Peter B. Parker, Ahkmenrah

Okoye

Okoye is straightforward and stony upon first impressions. And, admittedly, even afterward. The only real difference is that, if one gets to know her better, they might find shock in the fact that in spite of her appearance, she Dora leader actually likes sweets. However, it’s not sweet things in general that Okoye feels guilty for enjoying: It’s Starbucks.

Starbucks is the antithesis of everything Okoye is associated with: Supremely un-Wakandan, a chain establishment, and overall just not worth the absurd cost. Not to mention superbly unhealthy when compared to the rest of a fighter’s typical diet. But yet you can bet that every time she needs to go out of the country or off-continent, there’s an invasive shout for joy at the possibility that she might be able to get her hands on a Frappucino (followed by an internal scolding).

She can’t even explain exactly why she likes it; there are plenty of good, even healthier sweet things back in Wakanda -- heck, back anywhere else!

But it’s a bit like when someone craves the cheap taste of school pizza over a legit pie cooked in a stone hearth: She just loves the sugary sweetness, the application of whipped cream to an already tooth-rottingly saccharine icy drink, the addition of chocolate. But Bast, she also hates it. But ever since T’Challa practically shoved a grande cup of caramel frappucino into her hands, she hasn’t felt entirely the same.

Against her better judgement, she’s more or less unintentionally tried 45% of the menu drink-wise. She doesn’t particularly care much for the food part of the establishment, though if she should ever find herself in one during the fall, she might indulge in a chunky slice of pumpkin bread under the conviction that it’s healthy enough for being gourd-related. Never mind that it’s just a cinnamon mixture with more sugar than actual pumpkin-derived anything.

Really, of all those mentioned on this list, Okoye is the one who probably feels the most disappointed in herself whenever she indulges in her guilty pleasure: It’s a betrayal to her patriotism, to her dignity, and to her attempts to eat healthy. But damn, if this type of betrayal doesn’t taste so addicting . . .

Lucifer Morningstar

The thing about Lucifer is that it’s actually a bit hard for him to feel any regrets over liking anything; he’s the Devil, after all, so his whole thing is about embracing the things that make you feel good. And even besides that, he’s mostly managed to skate by in his time on Earth by categorizing things as Stuff He Likes, Stuff He Tolerates, Stuff He Doesn’t Bother With, and Stuff Humans Seem to Enjoy But He Doesn’t Quite Get. It’s a tad restricted of a system but you can’t argue with results.

However, just because something is difficult doesn’t mean that it’s impossible. The Devil can, in fact, recognize absurdity in liking certain things. Hence why, to a point, he’s fallen prey to his own bizarre pleasures: The Devil has guilty pleasures, and it’s in stupid YouTube videos, Vine, and TikTok.

After he finally drank the Kool-Aid and got himself a smart phone, it was only a matter of time before Lucifer fell down the rabbit hole that is YouTube prank videos and strange uploads about nonsense and animal humor. It was also only a matter of time before he found himself stumbling into Vine compilations. The Celestial is terrifically mystified by the creative power of humans, managing to tell entire stories and peak comedy in only a span of seven seconds. But he’s also quite loathe to have realized it’s been long defunct by the time he’s discovered it.

He’s even more loathe to find himself making references in his daily life: He has actually quietly blurted out, “I sure hope it does” in response to seeing a Road Work Ahead sign, causing Chloe some confusion (and Lucifer lots of embarrassment). He has referred to a culprit as “Jared, Age 19″. Since discovering Vine, there has been at least one night wherein he and a bed mate were sitting there with barbecue sauce on his tiddies, but that was by sheer coincidence.

But eventually the Vine compilation well dried up, and the inevitable transfer over to TikTok happened. And Luci honestly doesn’t know what to make of TikTok. He would describe it as Vine’s Molly-addicted cousin based on its obsession with dancing, but the dances are so stationary that even that doesn’t seem quite right. The videos on the platform are also much more . . . bizarre. And some of them admittedly trigger a fight-or-flight response in him, to which he always chooses the third option of freezing if only so he can keep watching the train wreck unfold before his eyes.

The trouble with TikTok, he’ll admit to himself, is that it’s not as easy to find iconic content the same way he could with Vine. However, this isn’t to say that he hasn’t found anything worth watching over and over and over again . . .

(Let’s just say the “Wolf Pack Compilation” lives in his head rent-free, and he’s both too amused by it and too overwhelmed by its vibe to try and evict it.)

Dewey Finn

Dewey is . . . a special case. Given that he associates messy living and indulging in one’s pleasure a part of the rocker lifestyle, he’s generally quick to embrace whatever makes him happy. He’s very upfront about his interests and is arguably almost incapable of feeling shame. But it’s in there: Deep down. No, not in himself -- in his Spotify. Specifically, a Spotify account made on an email he never uses because it was made specifically to create this separate, uber secret playlist.

One marked “Actual Musical Bops.”

Dewey hates musicals: They’re cheesy, uninspired, gaudy, ridiculous, totally aimed at chicks with weird fantasies that he could never aspire to, and the music is just overall unimpressive. And yet, somehow, against his music elitist nature, a handful have managed to slip through the cracks. At the very least, a handful of numbers have clawed their way past his defenses and into his ear, where they now live rent-free.

In spite of his best efforts, the problems are that he’s a New Yorker, so it’s inevitable that he hears a song or two; and also that, as an instructor (to wealthy New York tweens whose families can afford frequent tripes to the Great White Way, no less), he’s definitely going to wind up hearing about some shows and their stand-out numbers: Against his will, he knows the lyrics to “My Shot”; he has cried in the secrecy of his apartment to “When I Grow Up”; in the never-necessary reason he needs to remember how many minutes there are in a year, he sings it inside his head; hell, he’s even found himself trying to figure out the electric guitar riff from “The Phantom of the Opera” during his down time.

What’s all the more embarrassing is that, given how he presents himself as a music elitist, there’s just no way he can come back from this if anyone were to know. He has to catch himself when he finds himself humming “Johanna” in the teacher’s lounge. He scowls at himself when he can’t sleep and gives in and starts playing “No One is Alone.” He wants to kick his thick ass every time he realizes he’s excited to have stumbled across a “slime tutorial” on YouTube, this one with better quality than the last. The reason he actually put a password on his phone wasn’t out of privacy like a sensible person would, but out of a need to make sure that no one ever found out that he had downloaded the entire Beetlejuice soundtrack, including jankily-recorded songs that never made it to the official cast recording for whatever reason!

And should anyone ever find out about any of this, Dewey has a plan: “Oh, I’m doing research. I’m studying these songs so I can give the kids a lesson on what not to do as actually competent musicians.”

But the lesson would never actually come. Mainly because he keeps prolonging his “research” . . .

He’s also developed a bit of a soft spot for My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic due to some students gushing about it, but he would rather sooner die than ever be associated with the term “brony.”

Peter B. Parker

Peter is at a point where he’s too tired to really care about the idea of guilty pleasures. The way he sees it, there are bigger priorities at stake than worrying about someone finding out about your love of some hokey activity or food or form of entertainment.

Besides, he’s a New Yorker: There’s way weirder stuff for people to just not pay any real attention to. Hence why he thinks nothing of his bizarre eating habits. And no, this isn’t referring to his disastrous appetite: This is about his tendency to eat food with his hands. Foods that, well, he really should probably utilize eating utensils for.

To be fair, this habit has always existed in him in some form or another, especially since, as Spider-Man, he often needs to eat food on the go. But during the time he spent living the life of a depressed bachelor, it came out in full force. On the rare occasion he wasn’t eating a food that deserved to be eaten by hand, he often found himself loathing the idea of doing the dishes afterward. There would be days he’d feel only slightly less depressed; enough to make a box of Kraft Mac n Cheese in the pot, but not enough to avoid cutting out the middle man.

He’s thankful the craptastic apartment wasn’t also see-through because if it were, he’s positive his neighbors would’ve thought they were bearing witness to a man’s breakdown as he wept into a pot of macaroni and cheese, his hand full of the stuff, while wearing a Spider-Man costume. (And, to be fair, they actually would be.)

In addition to this, there were also those nights where he would be prepared to actually tuck in to a plate of spaghetti, only for some crime going on elsewhere in the city to drag him away. By the time he’d return, the plate would’ve been cold and his energy too depleted to want to even dream about cleaning more than he already had to.

The great news is that he’s thankfully done a 180, now able and willing (if begrudgingly) to clean up after himself. But bad news is that this feral man will still eat a fully-loaded baked potato like an apple. In a park. In front of women and children. He’s just too tired to care anymore. He’s aware of the guilt in this as a concept, but he’s also aware that he needs to take whatever happiness he can get out of whatever he does. And if that means eating everything by hand, then so be it!

Ahkmenrah

Funnily enough, Ahkmenrah doesn’t seem to experience much of any shame for enjoying the things most might feel the need to hide: He’s constantly curious and has missed out on a lot over the centuries, so why should he feel bad for wanting to indulge in them? Celebrity gossip is just a more fun version of the palace gossip he’d grown up hearing as a boy; reality TV is like watching a play, but with much more fights, less deaths, and more faulty romances; and sloppy meatball subs are like a feast for a man of his time!

Besides, he’s a king: Kings shouldn’t have to feel embarrassment over what the common folk might think.

And yet . . . It took some time, but eventually Ahkmenrah did experience it: Guilt in his pleasures.

He couldn’t even recall where it had all started. Maybe he was searching for more content to swallow after the most recent season of his new favorite show had ended? Whatever the case, he wound up biting off more than he could chew when he stumbled upon . . . fanfiction.

The adorable yet sad thing is that he didn’t even think anything of it at first. It wasn’t until he brought up a ship he’d invested his last few nights awake exploring on the computer: Nobody knew what the crap he was talking about, so of course he felt the need to explain it. But the more he talked, the more perplexed his friends looked. And the more he could feel his cheeks and ears burn.

Oh, he thought. Is this . . . embarrassment? Is that what this feels like? Oh, this is just foul.

Thankfully, nobody pressured him to keep talking about it, but the poor king sure as heck didn’t feel much of a desire to talk any further about it. But he needed to talk to somebody about his newly acquired “feels” as those online were calling them.

Joining fanfiction-oriented sites was the next obvious step, of course, but he’s experienced mixed feelings about it: On one hand, it’s nice to talk with people who share similar views and excitement about a fictional couple. But on the other, the digital wars that have broken out both disturb him and bring out the worst in him.

Like, of course there are bigger things to deal with than whether or not So-So is better off with Him-Ham, but if you truly think that Blah-Blah and Himhaw are a healthy relationship, then you can go do a service and bury yourself in the desert sands to provide substance to the hungry beetles with your flesh --

Suffice to say, a lot of the guilt in this pleasure seems to come from the fact that Ahk can get a little too emotionally invested if the work is really good. He tries to limit his interactions to commenting and praising certain works, and encouraging content creators. However, he’s also contemplated contributing his own pieces of fiction to the fandom . . .

#okoye #lucifer morningstar imagines #dewey finn #peter b parker imagines #ahkmenrah #okoye imagines #lucifer imagines #dewey finn imagines #ahkmenrah imagines #regrettablewritings #spiderman into the spiderverse imagines #spiderman itsv imagines #spiderman imagines #i tried posting this on my phone and it literally fucking deleted EVERYTHING #anyway @staff: the fuck is up? fix that shit because now i literally cannot post SHIT on my phone from my laptop #preference #preferences

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shrinkthisviolet · 4 years

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Author Interview Tag!

Tagged by @maipreciation, thanks for thinking of me! This looks really fun :D

(Note: I’m keeping this as a running list, so if you’re ever wondering what fics im working on/brainstorming, make sure to check here! Last update was on 12/12/2020)

Name: Lavi! As of 12/5, I’m no longer going by my real name (see this post)

Fandoms: so many 😂 check my bio, I think I have them all listed. I’ve posted fic for Hamilton and ATLA, and then there was a huge Inktober compilation I posted last year with a whole host of fandoms. Currently, my major fandom is ATLA, and probably Kipo as I’m starting to move through S1

Where you post: I have an AO3 (lavi0123)! I used to have an FFN and a Wattpad, but I don’t use either of those anymore :/ tbh, I’m embarrassed of anything I still have up there 😂

Most popular one-shot: Most definitely we’ll give the world to you (and you’ll blow us all away), one of my contributions to Maiko Week! I’m not surprised it’s an ATLA fic, but I find it interesting that a fic with Izumi in it blew up so quickly. But hey, if y’all want more Izumi content, you won’t be disappointed 😉

Most popular multi-chapter fic: ...I’m really embarrassed to say because I don’t think I’ll ever finish it...but En Hamilton Heights is the only multichap fic I’ve published so it’s gotta be that one 😂 hopefully soon I’ll have another fic to add to that, since I’m working on one (sorry EHH fans but it’s been too long and tbh I don’t remember where I was going with it :/ I’m thinking I might orphan it)

Favorite story you’ve written so far: you think this world is a dream come true (but you’re wrong) for sure! It’s super niche but it’s something I wrote out of love for a movie I discovered this Halloween and absolutely love. Though all you’ve got to do is want something (and then let yourself have it) is a close second. Basically, anything I write that sounds absolutely bonkers as a concept is one that I love 😂 (and it’s no coincidence that both fics are Mai-centric! I love all my Mai-centric fics nearly equally)

Fic you were nervous to post: Is there an “all of the above” option? 😂 I’m always nervous to post. But in particular, I was nervous for if you ran away (come back home), because it was Mai-centric and longer than any one-shot I’d written thus far, and also you think this world is a dream come true (but you’re wrong), because it’s Mai-centric and a Coraline AU, which makes it BONKERS as an idea

Why was I nervous to post Mai-centric fics, you ask? Two reasons: 1) Mai is very different from who I am as a person (I vibe a lot more with Aang and Ty Lee, sometimes Katara and Sokka), so I didn’t want to upset the Mai stans by writing her incorrectly. 2) Mai is generally not well-liked in the fandom at large, so I especially didn’t want to attract antis who would accuse me of writing Mai as too emotional and loving (which is why I tried to justify that in my tags). Luckily, my comments have all been lovely, and I’m far less afraid to post fics about her now that I’ve written three fics with her as the focus! And the shoutout from @nonbinary-crafter-aang praising my portrayal of her?? I was touched 🥺 still am

How you choose your titles: Song lyrics or movie/book lines that speak to me, occasionally a pun. Remember that post I rb’d about how authors title their works? My tags pretty much say it all 😂

Do you outline: Ehh...define outlining 😂 for my one-shots, nope. But for my upcoming multichap works (see below) and Nanowrimo work (original fiction, so I won’t talk about it on here, but send an ask if you’re curious), YES ABSOLUTELY!

For my Nanowrimo work and one of my upcoming AUs (a Soulmate AU), the worldbuilding is so complex that it’s an absolute necessity. For the other upcoming AU (a time travel AU), there are just too many things that need to happen at certain times so as not to interfere with canon events, and things I want to change from canon and things I want to keep...I think you get the idea 😂

Complete: Basically my entire maiko halloweek series! Check it out if you want some fics about the most underrated canon ATLA couple :)

In-progress: ...En Hamilton Heights again...but not for long, sadly. Still trying to decide between a quick conclusion and just flat-out orphaning it. Still haven’t made up my mind, but either way, it won’t be what I originally planned, unfortunately.

I’m also counting my ATLA Soulmate AU on the basis of forever in my mind (only you), which has the worldbuilding and fits into the AU without much problem (the AU is going to be a series of one-shots, not a multichap fic, because there won’t be enough deviations from canon imo to justify multiple chapters. And one-shots are just less pressure for me 😂)

[EDIT 12/12/2020: added another fic because I’m an idiot and forgot about this too 🤦‍♀️😂 it’s a year-old idea that I started writing but I’m picking it back up thanks to the Heist banter in MatPat’s St Jude stream!]

-A fic series combining Escape the Night and Who Killed Markiplier (Heist and Date are part of it too, but only tangentially at the moment. Depends on how involved I want DA Y/N to be). Tentatively titled A Heavy Cost, and definitely won’t happen in any of Mark’s projects, but in a way that’s actually for the best 😂 the canonicity for me stops at ETN S3 (with some S4), then it’s canon divergence

Coming soon/not yet started: OOOH YESSS HERE WE GO

Okay okay sooo we’ve got two main things:

–An ATLA Soulmate AU, featuring platonic and romantic soulmates! I know I called it in-progress, and I stand by that even though I haven’t actually set up the series on AO3 yet, but this AU is about to be SO MUCH MORE than just a few Maiko moments. Because...drum roll...it’s gonna be entirely Aang-centric (with maybe one or two exceptions)! Like Mai, Aang is a character that doesn’t get as many -centric fics as he should (and being an Aang stan also isn’t unanimous for some reason??), so I’m gonna fix that. Plus I want to dive further into his mind, and I think I’m more equipped to do that than I was with Mai, since Aang and I are very similar in attitude.

–Bumizumi time travel AU, which can be read as platonic until the last couple chapters (it’ll be multichap) but definitely has a romantic agenda throughout. So just. Be warned if you don’t ship them. It’s gonna be chock full of comedy and antics! Also A LOT of platonic affection between Izumi and teen Zuko (and just between Izumi, Bumi, and the Gaang in general), because platonic affection is underrated and also I can :D I’m also probably gonna make fun of how some elements of affection have become solely romantic territory, because...um, no, hugging and holding hands and cuddling can be done between friends, thanks! (Maybe it’s the ace in me talking. But regardless)

There are also vague concepts I’m spitballing, like:

-Zukaang telepathy AU (Platonic Zukaang, the only romance I’ll ever write in ATLA is for the canon ships, prompted by a dream because apparently ATLA lives in my head rent-free forever now 😂)

-Evil Zuko AU (Azula doesn’t exist, mostly prompted after watching Aang make fun of Zhao and realizing that if Zuko had been in any position of power during the War...the Gaang would have stood no chance at all)

-Bumizumi Arranged Marriage AU (Bumi and Izumi both think the other is hotheaded/reckless (Izumi @ Bumi) or uptight (Bumi @ Izumi). So Kataang and Maiko (along with Sukka, Ty Lee, and Toph because...duh) set them up in an arranged marriage, with the presented reasoning being that they already know each other’s families, it’ll be a great symbol of unity, and this way Izumi doesn’t have to worry about suitors. They both agree to it (it’s arranged, not forced), and over time, they warm up to each other...and maybe even...fall in love?? Prompted because we need more arranged marriage fics! On that note, I’m gonna plug shadows and steel by @dearestpartnerofgreatness because arranged marriage needs more rep and this fic does it and with Maiko to boot!)

-Zukaang as Brothers AU (I saw a fic about this, but it wasn’t complete. If it’s not done by the time I get to this concept, I’m gonna write it, because just...imagine the possibilities! Zuko and Aang are already basically brothers in canon anyway, this is just making them brothers in blood as well as in their hearts. This is especially vague because I have no concept of how this is gonna work 🤷‍♀️ I’ll get to it eventually)

(Can you tell I’m obsessed with Zuko and Aang’s friendship? Because I am!)

[EDIT 11/25/2020: I’m adding two more because I forgot these have been swirling around in my head too 😂]

-A fix-it fic based on May You Always Be Satisfied, a backstory fic for Who Killed Markiplier by @blackaquokat! I recently reread it and remembered that I was gonna write a fix-it for that fic. Not because the fic sucks, it’s actually amazing! I’m just a sucker for the main (requited unrequited) pairing, and there’s at least five ways to make that pairing canon and avoid the mess of Who Killed Markiplier. And THEY ALL DESERVE TO BE HAPPY OKAY

-A Finnrey fix-it for the Star Wars Sequel Trilogy (this one is especially vague, and I probably won’t write it since a bunch of these already exist, but it’s fun to think about. Maybe if I ever run out of WIPs 🤷‍♀️)

Upcoming story that you’re most excited to write: I’m equally excited for the Soulmate AU and the Bumizumi Time Travel AU! I’m also excited for my Nanowrimo work to be finished, but that’s more so in-progress than upcoming

Tagging:

@nonbinary-crafter-aang @dearestpartnerofgreatness @ohsalamanders @blackaquokat (no pressure ofc, only if you want to! But please tag me if you do, I’d love to see it!)

#avatar the last airbender #atla #hamilton #maipreciation #thank you for the tag!#this was really fun :)#writing tag game #fanfic tag game #atla tag game #who killed markiplier #wkm #escape the night #etn

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johannas-motivational-insults · 4 years

Note

While you're talking HM, what about what was going on in the director corner during the pushup contest?

Oh, this is a fun one. (Commentary is bolded.)

So this scene was not planned, not really. I was on the bit where Catra is comforting Adora over something she doesn’t understand (Adora’s hurt feelings thinking that Catra is hung on on Scorpia, if that wasn’t clear from Adora’s side of things in previous chapters) and I, like Catra, was trying to think of a way to move on from that. I needed to cap the chapter and bring the mood up a little and Catra didn’t want Adora to to be sad anymore. So uh, yeah, this happened.

“I’m going to hug you now, okay?” announces Catra. Asking Adora if she wants a hug generally just causes her more distress, gives her one more thing to think about when she’s already overloaded. Adora gives a jerky nod and Catra steps in, wrapping her arms securely around Adora’s torso and pinning her arms to her ribs. Adora’s still standing stiff in her grip, though. “Tighter?”

Admittedly I kind of stole the “tighter?” thing from a scene in season 2 of Atypical. Not on purpose, but that scene lives rent free in my head so I can’t claim I would have come up with it on my own. As an autistic and a snarky wlw jock that show makes me feel seen.

“Yeah,” whispers Adora. When Catra obeys, the tension finally leaves Adora’s body, her chin relaxing onto Catra’s shoulder with a sigh. Moving entirely on instinct, Catra tips her head to rub her cheek against Adora’s. Her hands are kind of occupied, after all, locked tightly around her own biceps to maintain the pressure. Adora responds by nuzzling into Catra’s shoulder, but her throat bobs again against Catra’s collarbone. Clearly this isn’t enough, so Catra wracks her brain for another strategy. Anything to cheer Adora up, get her mind off whatever’s bothering her.

I just love opportunites for Catra to act vaguely catlike in human form. I try not to throw them in just for comedic effect in a way that’s distracting, but I liked this one.

“Hey, wanna have a push up contest?” is what she comes up with.

Adora snorts into her neck and Catra smiles. Shrugging off Catra’s arms, Adora steps back and sizes her up, eyes gleaming competitively in that way Catra loves. “Oh, you’re gonna regret that, Diaz.”

Adora, you are so very predictable.

She really should know better than to say something like that, knowing Catra’s abilities. Oh well, that’s just more motivation to kick her ass.

With this many jocks in one room, it turns into quite the event. Rogelio makes Entrapta pause the game so he can partake, and Entrapta gleefully accepts the role of referee. At Adora’s request, she changes the music to something with a strong beat, and the competitors shake their arms out and begin to take their positions on the floor.

I miss hanging out with jocks. One brain cell, all competitive energy.

Catra’s getting in the zone, the music narrowing her focus, but when the lyrics start and she recognizes the voice she almost chokes on her laughter. “Is this Nickelback?”

“It’s one of Scorpia’s favorite workout songs!” Entrapta says in her own defense.

Scorpia gasps, one hand flying to her chest as everyone shares a laugh at her expense. “Et tu, Entrapta?”

S.E.X. is a great workout song and no I do not take criticism. Tbh I threw this in because music was already such a big theme in this chapter that I wanted to continue with having a soundtrack, and because I have fond memories of this song playing in the locker room while my hockey team was getting dressed and pumped up for games.

In total there’s eleven of them on the floor when Entrapta says go, including Lonnie and Scorpia. But Catra’s not worried. This is just one more arena where people underestimate her. She’s lean, and yeah she definitely can’t bench as much as Scorpia or even Adora, but she’s strong for her size. She was a gymnast for fuck’s sake, bodyweight exercises are her jam.

This may be a little bit of a flip off to people who underestimate Catra’s strength and/or act like she would want to watch Adora work out but lie around lazily herself. Catra is compact but ripped, and she would absolutely ogle Adora but she’s also a competitive little motherfucker. Then again this whole fic started as a flip off to the football player Adora/cheerleader Catra trope so this is very on brand for me.

As Catra expected, the meatier types drop off quickly. Scorp and Hel and the other linemen are used to pushing hard, of course, but never for long. They can’t keep the beat past twenty push ups, but Catra’s just getting started.

It comes down to her and Adora, as always. Catra thrives off of competition and loves beating Adora in particular, but sometimes she thinks having a nemesis other than Adora would be nice. It gets a little confusing. (Oh Catra, I feel you. Being in constant competition with your crush and that making it even harder to know how to feel about her is a lesbian MOOD.) The lyrics aren’t exactly helping with that, either.

‘I'm lovin’ what you wanna wear’ ‘Wonder what's up under there’ ‘Wonder if I'll ever have it under my tongue’

Catra exhales hard with every push, trying to ignore Adora’s breathy grunts to her left. Sweat rolls down her brow and drips off her nose as her face heats up, and she’s glad she has the contest to blame for it. The rest of the room hollers and cheers but Catra barely hears any of it. It’s just her and Adora, locked in a battle of wills.

Jesus Christ is it getting hot in here? (Also yes this might be a slight nod to how they’re both tops and this is what makes their relationship great.)

‘S is for the simple need’ ‘E is for the ecstasy’ ‘X is just to mark the spot ‘cause that’s the one you really want’

Yeah can you blame me for picking this song? ‘Cause tbh...

Adora keeps up longer than Catra expected, powered by pure competitive lesbian energy. Catra almost starts to worry she ran her big mouth and is about to have her ass handed to her, but soon after they hit the 50 mark Adora’s arms start to wobble, her breaths coming hard.

“Come on, Adora!” shouts Lonnie. “Don’t give up now!”

Of course Lonnie’s on her side. That just makes Catra grit her teeth and push through the burn with a breathless growl.

“Keep it up, Wildcat!” counters Scorpia. “Just a little more, she’s fading!”

I love Scorpia and Lonnie butting heads over Catra because Lonnie is that mean friend and Scorpia is Scorpia. It’s gonna happen again in chapter 8. ;)

Catra keeps pounding away and Adora finally falters, her jelly arms failing to match the beat in time.

Oh that... that was not meant to sound as sexual as it did. But I will absolutely not take that back.

“Adora, you’re out!” calls Entrapta. “That’s it!” Still, Adora doggedly fights through to the top of her final push up before collapsing in a heap. Grinning down at the floor, Catra keeps going. Might as well drive the point home. “Catra, you can stop now!”

A broken and beautiful laugh sounds beside Catra’s ear, a blunt fingernail poking into her shoulder as she works. “Show off.”

Adora is absolutely just taking an opportunity here to touch Catra while watching her work out. It goes both ways.

But Catra’s not just showing off. She has a goal. When Entrapta finally hits 69, she drops to the hardwood with a heavy gasp. Raising one hand, she pinches the tips of her thumb and forefinger together and pants, “Nice.”

That is so very Catra.

That gets a laugh out of the crowd, including Adora. One of her hands touches Catra’s back and Catra turns her head to find her smiling. Genuinely, this time. It’s the most beautiful sight in the world. Catra flips onto her back to see it better, and Adora’s hand ends up resting on her heaving stomach.

And they both wish it was lower lbr.

“Tell me again how you don’t like being the center of attention,” teases Adora, her speech still broken and breathless.

Catra just grins, clasping her hands behind her head. “Never said I didn’t.”

Yeah for something I added in at the last minute I really enjoy this scene. Competitive sexual tension is my jam.

#ask games #director's commentary #catradora #fanfic #hail mary #spop #writing #asks #anon

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cosmiclatte28 · 4 years

Text

Secret Love Song (ten x you)

here we go!

ps. Ten is a WayV and SuperM idol here, while Yuta, Jaehyun, and Johnny are not idols! Thanks

Song : Secret Love Song from little mix and Jason Durelo lol Derulo xD

warning : tiny bit of insecurities, lots of fluff, happy end.

CHITTAPON IS JUST SO SWEET!

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You make your way slowly back to your small studio apartment. You rush from the nearest bus stop, walk through the cold winter night, reach the front door and then take the lift to your room. Today has been tiring, your neck and lower back are aching from sitting on stools for hours and reaching your clients body as you inject safe permanent inks into their skin. Yes, you are a tattoo artist, working in a superior tattoo parlor, where hygiene levels are guaranteed safe and the drawings are not regrettable. Well, your clients paid a hundreds of dollars to have a 4 inch tattoo! You have to admit, being a tattoo artist in a high-class studio gave a fair amount to pay your rents, eat decent foods, and spend some money for your happiness. You sigh when you remember that the flat fee for this month has been raised, and you know you will need to either find a new living space or work extra hours to pay for the extra cost.

You stretch your neck for a while as your fingers type in a six digit combination to open the door to your heaven: the bed. Once you close the door behind you, you take off your coat, carelessly toss your bag to the sofa, and free yourself from your boots. You make a quick attempt to untangle your scarf and dive belly first to your soft mattress. A sigh of great relieve escapes your mouth and you find your eyelids super heavy. You would totally fall asleep within five seconds if your bizarre phone did not disturb you.

Your hand blindly searches for the rectangular noisy object and when you find it, the ring has ended. You groan in frustration, but your fatigue drowns you back to slumber. This time there was a short beep five times in a row, and you know that is your boyfriend messaging you. Your mind fights over waking up to call him back, or just drive your tired eyes to sleep and deal with him later when you're fresh. You decided to do the latter, but today must not be your day. Your phone rings again and your finger slides to pick up his call.

"What?!" You snapped.

"Woah, easy... Did I call the wrong number?" the man on the other hand takes his phone away from his ear to check the caller ID. He shakes his head when he ensures this is the right number.

"Sorry... I-"you yawn and he stays silence until you continue, "I just got home, and your calls postpone my -so needed- sleep..."

He smiles to himself when he heard your yawns and slurs.

"Okay, I'll just tell you I'm busy for the next three days. I'll call you back, I need to do my make up now. Bye!"

You did not reply him, your brain didn't actually understand anything he said, you've lost yourself into the dreamland after finishing your sentence. You sleep through your dinner time, only to snore deeper as the night darkens.

One man sits stiffly on his chair in the powder room. He is waiting for his stylist to come and do his make up before he steps into the stage filled with a crowd dedicating their life, money, and time to support him and his group. He shakes his shoulder a bit to throw the pressure away, why did he feel like he committed a great sin for calling his girl just to disturb her from sleeping.

"Who is that Ten hyung?" Yang-yang who happens to catch a few of Ten's surprised action earlier asked.

Ten turns his head to face the youngest boy, he's about to open his mouth before the tallest and loudest man cuts his answer "It's (y/n) of course," Lucas offers his big smile while slapping Ten's shoulder.

"Stop it Lucas, I might poke his eye because of your sudden slap when I am drawing this eyeliner." The stylist who has been working hard to polish this pretty eyes of Ten, scowls at Lucas.

"Sorry, but it's true right?? It's (Y/n)???" Lucas takes a seat on one of the free chairs in the powder room. He's ready to go on stage already.

Ten shakes his head in disbelief and nods, "Yes it's her. Happy?"

Yang-yang smiles and drags his chair closer, "So... what happened? Spill the tea!"

Lucas also has his eyes bigger twice as much in size and his back is straightened, he is ready for the gossip!

Ten smacks his lips when the last stroke of light lipstick was applied; he checks himself on the mirror and nods an approval for the stylist to go. "Thank you!"

Now when nobody else is in the room, Ten finally opens his mouth.

"I called her at the wrong time I think... She snapped at me because she said I disturb her sleep?"

The two younger men pretend to understand though really they don't have a single idea why Ten must look this nervous just because his girlfriend snapped. Hey, every person has a bad day right?

Ten stares into the two soul across him and he face palms himself mentally when he realize there was no way Lucas nor Yang-yang understands his worry.

"Forget it, both of you are not helping." Ten pushes himself from the chair to put on his golden jacket.

"We're putting on mikes and in 7 minutes, you're going Live." The stage director opens the door right in time and a swarm of crew help the members put on their mikes.

Ten glances at his phone for the last time, there his smile rises when one notification pops from none other than you.

From: mon petit cœur

"Burn the stage,love! Bad Alive deserves the spotlight. <3"

Ten knows he doesn't have to reply that message, but the heavy weight in his heart is gone as he takes a deep breath and joins his other brothers to the side of the stage. They chant their group cheers and soon take over the stage.

You're awakened by your alarm clock around seven at night. Your head feels dizzy and you know that's probably because you skipped dinner. You force yourself to open your eyes. Your fingers expertly open the messenger application and through your squinting eyes, you type a short message to your boyfriend. Well, you promised him you won't miss their first stage of Bad Alive, and so here you are! seated on your worn-off sofa, an apple on one hand and the small TV provides you music and pictures. You focus yourself on the screen when you can see your boy and his team already shown for the interview at the screen. You fix your position, increase the volume, and you're totally awake when the stage shows your favorite group of all time.

The three minutes performance was over. You get up from your position, walk to throw the apple core away, and you grab your phone back.

To : Ten

"Amazing job you did there, my body's burning,

Guess I can save money from not using any more heaters.

Going home? <3"

You want to meet Ten so bad, it's already one month since you two didn't see each other. He has intensive practices for the comeback. Not that you're not understanding or selfish; You just wish he can make some time to come tonight, because you need someone to listen to you.

Your phone bleeped after an hour. Ten must've finished all of his works and probably already seated in the van, ready to leave the venue.

From: Ten

"Glad the song kept you warm. Sadly I've told you earlier in the call I cannot make it home these three days. Next week I also have another stage performance. I'll let you know when we can meet. How's today?"

Your shoulder slumped, you ghost you finger over the call button. You want to call him right now, but dating an idol is not that simple. If some manager or stylist caught you in the act, they might tell this to the director board and you know how this will end. Yes forced break up!

You left him on read. You glance at the clock on the dining room. It's already nine, you have some place to go. You dress yourself in a warm jacket and you leave the empty room. You hail a cab and direct an address. Your phone vibrated and you picked up a call.

"Hey! Where are you now?" Ten asks

"I'm going out for a while, why?"

"Oh, where are you headed to?"

"Ummm Johnny's, I forgot he invited me over for wine and cheese. Wanna join?"

"Is this Saturday Night already?"

You chuckled, "Yes Mr. busy, this is a Saturday Night."

"I'll see how the meeting with SuperM goes, til then have fun and be safe, Love you!"

"He's a nice brother, don't worry I'll be okay. Wait I have to get off the bus."

Ten waited for you on the other side of the line. He likes to make sure you're okay on the road. He busies himself with a strand of loose thread on his jacket and holds the phone close to his ear. His smile returns when your breathy voice greets him back.

"Woah, sorry there were several people going down too.

I'm only 3 minutes away! Are you in the office yet?"

"I'm entering the lobby, need to rush to the lift and see if everyone's there already."

"Okay, guess I'll end the call here. I can see his house already."

"No, I'll wait until you are in his house. Besides my notification just notifies me Taemin hyung is late."

"Well, I'm here already. Johnny's by my side."

"Alright, trust you. Tell him I miss him! Okay then, enjoy your night.

Call me whenever you need my help. Love you!"

You smile at his small attention, "Thanks Ten, Love you too! Good luck with the meeting."

The phone call ended

You enter the kitchen of the small house your brother and his fiancée bought. Johnny is five years older than you, and that's why he has been able to take care of you ever since the two of you were young. Johnny's wife happened to be staying in her mother's house because she had to look after her younger cousins. Johnny cannot join her because he needs to supervise his office. So here you are, the two of you meet one another for a siblings quality time.

"Tonight's special is Cabernet Franc," Johnny said after examining the bottle and taking the cork off.

I push him my empty glass and he fills in both glasses with the red liquid.

"Cheers," You both chime and clank the glass.

Moving on to sit on the comfortable L-sofa, you make yourself comfortable before finally starting to chat and talk about life. A soft music was played on the background, some classics because both of you felt like it.

"So, how is your day?" asked Johnny.

You gulp down the rest of the wine and roll your eyes, "Bad. Worst!"

Johnny straightens his back, "Ten? Or Work?"

You run your eyes right and left, taking a moment to think which one of them is bothering your mind. You smile when you know the answer, "Both!"

Johnny only raises his brow and you know the queue to spill everything out. Your mind went back to earlier this morning, where you woke up late and missed the bus to your office. You had to take the cab, since Ten was busy with his performance schedule today. You had to spend a good $20 to make it on time. You did arrive on schedule; the shop was opening as per usual. You greeted your co-workers, Yuta and Jaehyun.

The three of you have been working together since this parlor opened, there were no other worker here because we don't need that much! The people who step through the door were usually a regular or have made an appointment. However, today was totally irregular!

You remember the horror of Jaehyun's face when he entered the employee room with terror. Yuta was working on a customer's drawing and you were washing and cleaning the pen.

"We sorta have a problem here, there were three girls wanting to get a tattoo done without any appointments."

Yuta raised his brow, there must be something next that will surprise them both.

"They're minors. I've told them to come back when they're older, but they insisted."

"Let me talk," You place your pen down on a table and take the queue to talk to the girls. Well, Jaehyun is a softie, he cannot be strict especially to high-school girls.

You caught the three girls giggling over a picture on their phone, and you quickly snatched it away from her hand. They gasped and protested on your action, but you were taller than them.

"Sorry, but it was not appropriate for you to secretly take pictures of another person. This, I'm sure you took them secretly earlier. You're violating someone's privacy." You said as you deleted the pictures of a candid Jaehyun.

"If you're here only to take inappropriate pictures of my co-worker, leave immediately and don't ever come back. And you're clearly not 18 yet, the law stated you must be 18 to have a tattoo. Til then, let's wait patiently. Come back only when you are 18 and permitted to have ink on your body. Good bye." You returned the phone and shrugged your shoulder to the exit door.

The three girls have fires in their eyes and they were clearly killing you in their heads, but you're not afraid of babies like them.

"You're mean! Just wait for our revenge!" One of the girl stomped her feet in anger and ordered the other two to follow her and they left the parlor.

You let go a breath you held back earlier, then you decided to take the welcome desk for a while.

Just when you thought nothing else will go wrong, that's where you were fucked. Across you stood your nightmare. The enormous man across you smiled secretly when he found you greeting him.

"Well, welcome back Sir Dimitry, I believe you're here for a touch up?" You ran your eyes through today's schedule. Sadly his name was not there, but he was a regular and he's the Russian gang leader here, who roamed around Incheon at night. You knew better not to mess up with him, but that was not what bothers you.

He Is big and scary, the first time you saw him was when Yuta has to do a big dragon on his well built arm. That day you were occupied with another client, but although you were focused on doing your work, you can't help but feel his gaze on your body. Yuta and Jaehyun were aware of this, and since then they always try their best to take his project and they always lied you're busy or occupied. You're thankful for them. The two men were not so pleased to work on his skin too, for his drawings were always big, disturbing, and scary. However, he was the most generous tipper, and that made them close their mouth and ears (because he used to answer calls and believe me your ears won't stay cold listening to his choices of bad words).

"I haven't made an appointment yet, and I came here for a new drawing. I've had one in my mind and I believe you can finish tracing it in a couple of minute." The big guy leaned forward on the table.

There were two other people coming in and Yuta happened to pass by. You threw him a "help" sign and Yuta bit his lips, "My client is here already... I'm sorry, try Jaehyun."

Yuta took his customer to the studio and Jaehyun appeared beside you.

Jaehyun glanced at the clock, then looked into the Russian man's blue eyes "I'm sorry sir, but today we're a bit tight. You can come back here tomorrow say around one? I'll take your order, do you want a new drawing or retouch?"

The man hit the table, "I believe this lady over here is free right now, I don't see any client waiting for her. That guy is clearly your job Jae, I saw his tattoos those were definitely yours."He smiled winningly.

You cursed in your heart, well today you happened to have no appointments, you're only making templates. You closed your eyes, inhaled, and looked at Jaehyun. You nodded your head to tell him you'll be okay and you'll take him. Jae could lost his eyes from the shock when you sighed and told the big man, "Alright, I am free for two hours. Before that let me remind you I cannot do strong and big inks."

The Russian man smirked like a cat who won a fish, you took him to the processing room and he explained you what he want. You went to your professional mode and focused clearly on making his dream comes true. You were bargaining with him to make the designs smaller and less bold, he finally gave in. You worked your drawing quickly and after he agreed, you prepared your tools.

To make it short, it was the longest two hours in your life. He was clearly stealing views of you concentrating, and he was throwing so many offensive and disturbing flirts. You almost lost your cool when he joked about how hot you would look like on bed. You promised you held yourself from not forcing the word "bastard" to his neck and you clearly knew Yuta and Jaehyun were both busy keeping eyes on you. You're focused on making a word out of Russian alphabet you didn't know.

"I am attached, so please stop. You're going over the line already." You exhaled when he tried to touch your lap. You quickly pushed his hand away and you rushed your work.

"I said stop! You're harassing me!" You tossed the pen to your metal tray, and you pushed your chair back. He was not totally harassing you physically, but he was mentally fucking you. You saw his tent and you decided you'll stop your work. Well you finished it right on time though.

"I can file a report and you can be trialed." You stood up from your stool, but he held you back faster.

"Let go off her," Yuta threw him a deadly gaze and swatted the man's hand.

"You won't, they wouldn't care. Look this tattoo's amazing. I'm leaving you 500! Take the change." He forced the bills in my hand and made his way out.

You stood there surprised and petrified. You're ashamed of yourself, but what would your boss say if he found out a client was not satisfied because the girl artist did not want to work on his body. You'll lose your favorite job, and no you don't want that to happen yet.

Yuta and Jaehyun comforted you and ensured that you were not assaulted physically or even harmed. You shook your head and a tear fell on your cheeks. "I am embarrassed of myself, I feel bad for Ten... and Fuck I blew up my relationship."

Yuta ensured nobody will know, or you hope so. The day continued and after some more picky madams with boring gossips, you went home with....well an extra $300. You actually hated the money, but 300 is a big number, you can either put it on donation or pay your rent. You decided to put it in the cashier box though, let your boss decide. Usually a 100 bucks is already a big tip, this is triple! But thinking back of his actions, you hate everything.

"You sure you're okay?" Johnny reaches for your hand and takes a good look on your body.

You giggle, "It's fine, he almost reached for my lap but I was faster! But his mind, I can't control that..."

Johnny nods, "Just avoid him okay, or tell your boss you cannot take him. Moving on, tell me about Ten!"

"About Ten, I just hope dating an idol can be more public." You swirl your wine that had been refilled.

Your mind one again brought you into a daze, you remembered two years ago when Ten knew you from his tattoo appointment. You were responsible for his temporary tattoo for a comeback. He knew you from Taeyong, fellow SuperM member who made the 'UNDER STAND' tattoo with your help. Ten likes the result and he asked Taeyong where he got it done.

To make it short, you frequently see one another from discussion, drawing, and planning. Ten and you learned about one another quickly while he was on his ink bed, and you're focused on drawing his perfect sketch on his arm. The meeting became frequent after three months where he needed another tattoo for a comeback.

After returning about ten times to have a retouch or a new design, Ten finally earned your number. From there, everything was so fast and you're suddenly on your third year of dating an international famous idol! You thought you were ready for everything, not going public, staying home most of the time for dates, wearing masks and keep being undercover, even having sleepless nights while waiting for his message when he's away on a world tour. You can go on with the list, but you decided to focus on the good things more.

You were okay with Ten being away from his phone most of the time. He always did his best to send you an update about him, be it one emoji, a selfie, or a whole long ass paragraph of how his day went. He couldn't call you that much because someone might eavesdrop.

So far, no one thought Ten is having a secret love relationship. There were small fights, but both of you can talk it out together with cool heads and bonded stronger after the fight. Ten could see you and him being a family in the future, he even boldly told you his parents can't wait to meet you.

You were okay with all of the relationship, you were okay with his fans, you supported him on concerts and voting, you basically love him too with all your heart. Only one thing actually made you sad.

"What is that one thing? Not posting it in social media?" your brother teases you.

You lean on the soft cushions; your finger carelessly fiddles with the tassels hanging around the blanket Johnny had wrapped around you. You toss your look to his curious face.

"I want to walk under the cold winter air beneath the romantic lights, hand in hand, warmth shared from I don't know his heat pack in his pocket maybe... Then imagine the Christmas Carols are softly whispering in the night, mistletoe is everywhere. It doesn't have to wait until Christmas... I just want it whenever we can." You plop a cheese into your mouth. Your eyes were glassy when they look into Johnny's

Johnny pulls you closer and you instinctively lean in and let him caresses your back.

"You're tipsy, can you still walk?"

You shot your eyes open, the hell did your brother just kicked you out? Hey it's night already! Shouldn't he let you sleep in??

"I am not going home! It's dangerous! What kind of brother are you? Telling your little sister to go home at this time." You hit him repeatedly.

Johnny rolls his eyes, you clearly had too much!

"WALK TO THE BED SIS, WALK TO MY ROOM AND SLEEP PROPERLY." Johnny stresses each of the word in case my ears did not caught them.

You look at him blankly and Johnny knew you're gone already. He swiftly picks you up and carries you to the bed. Nicely he tucks you in and he cleans up the mess in the living room.

He notices his phone vibrating; noticing it was Ten, he picks up the call.

"She's sleeping in tonight, you're on the dorm right?" Johnny asks.

Ten answers him his schedule for the week and how he's not going home. He also told Johnny what happened earlier this afternoon. Johnny smirks as he whispers a code to Ten.

Two weeks passed by, you already forgot your grudges to Ten. You try to be considerate to his hectic schedules. One cold afternoon, just after you finished working on your last client for today, you take your time cleaning the tools and sterilizing them. While humming to Love Talk, your favorite song, Jaehyun peeks from the curtain door.

"(Y/n), someone's looking for you." Jaehyun drags the curtain open. You pause your activity, for a moment; your eye brows quirked. You focus your mind to see if you missed an appointment, but no you're positive no one called you for a session this afternoon.

"Hmm, we still have time before closing time, so okay I'll take it."

You leave the room to see your client and you're surprised to see your boyfriend sitting on the waiting room.

"Ten!" You squeal out of surprise and joy. You run to hug him, well it has been three weeks since you last saw him in tangible state. Three weeks of video-calls and texts were quite satisfying, nevertheless.

Your boyfriend hugs you back and engulfs your smaller figure. He inhales the sweet scent of your shampoo he missed and how he wished the time can stop here right now.

"You're here for a new tat?" You ask after breaking the hug.

Ten shakes his head, "No, I got dismissed earlier and I want to pick you up!"

You blushed, hey that's so sweet of him. Unlike other boyfriends, having Ten walking in the sidewalk without his manager and body guards is a rare occurrence. Ten was always in the van or swarmed by fans! This afternoon however, here he is standing with a long winter coat, face hidden under a cap and a mask. He did not wear anything eye catching to avoid the media and saesangs. He did it! He made it here in your office without any missing piece or a trending twitter hashtag!

"Well we have another 20 minutes before my shift ends; do you need any help for a tattoo?" You smile at him. Hey planning a tattoo with Ten is always wonderful.

"You know we can always draw them together at home." He smirks and brushes my hair away from my face.

"Okay then, wait for a moment as we're tidying up." A big smile erupts from your lips and your heart is full of flowers!

"Good bye Jae, Yuta!" You wave your hand as the two men let you leave first while they close the doors.

Ten is already waiting for you on the front porch with his hidden face. You place your mask over your face too. You stick yourself next to Ten to hug his arm, his heart softens at the sight, how a soft girl like you can work as a tattoo artist with Yuta and Jaehyun (who both have enormous prints on their bodies).

Without any warning, Ten takes one of your hand into his, he holds yours tightly and slips them to his jacket pocket."It's a bit cold right? Now where should we go?"

Your eyes widen, usually he always brings you home directly since he cannot be in public for too long.

"Shall we just go home? I can cook dinner." You sound confused by his offer tonight.

Ten shakes his head, and drags you without any clue where are we headed.

You are so stunned when you find yourself finishing a nice dinner course at a new restaurant. Luckily it was not crowded yet and no one seems to notice Ten, but dinner was not the end of the surprise.

You stand frozen under the dazzling disco ball, beneath your feet are colorful light up tiles, surrounding you are the moving body of half-conscious people, and your ears are slowly aching from the loud music.

"Ten, can we go somewhere quiet, I can't talk." You lean in closer to scream into his ear and your boyfriend pulls you out of the crowded space.He brings you to the bar and helps you sit on one of the stool.

"One bourbon for me, and a vodka for this pretty lady." Ten smiles to the bartender.

After he takes his sit next to you, you raise your brow. He knows that code and he quickly reaches for your hands.

"You don't like dancing in the club? It's a Sunday Night, I thought some drinks won't hurt right?" Ten knows you're not new to these kinds of places.

You let out a free laugh, "I do love dancing in the club, I'm just surprised why you're suddenly doing this. Plus if you told me, I could have prepared for better attire!" You hit him playfully.

Ten takes your hand into his, "Well, you look great already, plus we must not catch attention right." He leans in closer to you.

Your eyes slowly move down over his nose and finally on his lips. Maybe it was the way they glistened under the dim light, or the tenderness you miss, or just simply his lip bites he always did when he's nervous! You feel gravity pulling you closer just to taste a tiny bit of it, but Ten moves back quickly when the bartender returns with two glasses of our drinks.

"Thank you!" Ten hands over the cash and offers you your glass. You found yourself stupid for almost kissing him in public. Rule number one of dating an idol is to never kiss on public.

"Sorry," You look everywhere but his eyes and gulp down your shot.

Ten just nods beside you and there was a bit of a tension between you and him. Maybe you're still embarrassed of your action, but Ten is actually enjoying your braver side.

"Let's hit the floor. I really miss dancing together." Ten easily picks you out of your stool and lands you gently on the floor. One shot of vodka won't make you drunk yet, but you spent your youth dancing on the dance floor, so this is nothing for you.

The DJ was wonderful tonight; his choices of songs are perfect and as the two of you are getting more and more heated up under the throbbing lights. The dance floor was crowded and there was not much space left. You share his body heat, you can feel his breath tickles your neck, and you can once again see his plump cherries. You drive your mind elsewhere, and move your body to the rhythm. You smile at him and he smiles back at you, with one deep glance the two of you inches closer and closer.

Your eyes grew heavy, vision dark, you let your other senses work, and you feel that warm plump lips touching yours. You caught your breath and after some time, he pulls back. The loud sound blasting through the speaker slowly disturbs your hearing again. You open your eyes slowly and stare into his deep eyes. He places his hands over your waist, pulls you into his arms, and the two of you sway to the loud slow music the DJ offers.

You're no longer thinking straight. You bury your face into his chest, you trust yourself into his lead and a single tear fell down.

When you hold me in the street

And you kiss me on the dance floor

I wish that we could be like that

Why can't we be like that, Cause I'm yours.

You know this is everything you need to face when dating an idol, and you cannot hate him for this. It was your decision to say yes to him. Your head spins, your ears deafened, your vision darkens, and you no longer feel your feet.

You lost your conscious; all of a sudden you're already lying down on your bed. Turning your head to the side, you see Ten sleeping by your side hugging you loosely while taking in calm and relaxed breath. You grit your teeth as you try your best to softly turn your body to face him.

In his warm embrace you snake your hand to ghost over his godly face to brush away the golden locks away from his eyes. You stare at his innocent face, you're overwhelmed. It's been a while since the last time you has Ten by your side when you sleep. He was always busy and thousands of miles away from you in a different time zone. You touch his cheeks and wipe a tear running down from your eye.

We keep behind closed doors

Every time I see you, I die a little more

Stolen moments that we steal as the curtain falls

It'll never be enough

Just the sound of his relaxed breathing and the slight touch of his arms over your waist, you finally found the missing warmth and peace you've always craved for bedtime. Having Ten lying next to you tonight sparked a small fire in your chest. You feel safe and you're so emotional. You snuggle closer to him, Ten stirs in his sleep but did not wake up, instead he naturally finds your body and fixes his posture to a comfortable position. You face his chest, right where you can see the tattoo you nicely did on his left chest (where he worked so hard to get his mom's permission) you smile when you remember how happy he was when he sneaked out to meet you to deliver the happy news.

Your heart flutters, he did not need to wake up to fit you into his embrace. Your relationship fits like a puzzle where each pieces were so different that you won't make mistakes. You want to believe that Ten is the one destined for you and so are you to him!

It's obvious you're meant for me

Every piece of you just fits so perfectly on me

Your mind plays thousands of silly scenarios. Most of them were happy, but you cannot lie that the darkest corner in your brain still repeatedly tricks you with nightmares. It was not the first time you have dreams about his fans finding out your relationship, you cannot imagine their faces and you cannot imagine living with the constant fear that one of those fans might kill you out of obsession!

Your insecurities also snatch your confidence away whenever you see Ten standing on a stage with another "oh so perfect" girl idols or models or hell actresses! Not to mention the flirty look those back up dancers always toss to your man. Well, they might be throwing flirts on him because they did not know Ten is attached already; however, even when they know 90% will fight harder and the rest 10% will let go. You're living in fear, in terror that one day when you wake up Ten can no longer be beside you.

You break your own promise about always telling one another your fears and struggles. You hide them behind your cheerful smile, you blame yourself for over thinking, and you make sure Ten will never know that. You are learning every day to put the negative thoughts away and focus on the good ones. Ten needs your support, Ten loves you, and you believe that. You can sleep a bit after convincing your heart that the man hugging you here is an angel made for you!

Every second, every thought, I'm in so deep

But I'll never show it on my face

Your eyes flung open when you feel the sudden drop of temperature. Your hand reaches to your side in panic and you peek to see that it's no longer occupied. You stretch yourself to wake up, Ten might be away already for his schedule. You take your phone to see any message he probably left, but there were none. You glance to the door, it was closed. There are no traces of Ten, not his shirt, not even his phone.

Once the room door was opened, your nose is filled with a fresh smell of bacon and eggs. Your smile returns when you see Ten only in his boxer and apron. You can hear your washing machine working and when you look at the door, you smile when you see a pile of your laundry and his outfits are there.

"Morning princess, I'm sorry I have to run the laundry for my clothes...since someone happened to spill a drink over me yesterday and I'm not going back to the dorm with a smelly outfit." Ten explains while flipping an egg over. He sets the fire to a lower heat and turns his body to see you.

You can only smile like a dumb love-struck girl (which is not wrong). You make your way to jump and hug him. Ten automatically receives you in his arms and you dip your head down to greet your lover with a sweet morning kiss. In between the sweet kiss, you can see Ten smiling like he enjoys these kinds of cheesy morning things.

"You better stop kissing me," Ten speaks up on our short breaks, he kisses you one more time, "Or I will burn the eggs."

You laugh and toss your head back, you take your queue to jump off him and Ten quickly saves his egg from burning. "Just right in time," He smirks when he plates the last egg on the dish.

"Please take your seat miss, breakfast by your hottest man is ready." He sits down across you with one plate of the same menu. From your request, Ten did not take off his apron. No you do not need a distraction this early!

Your mind records every single moment Ten giggles and laughs, his wake up state is already so lovely and you cannot imagine how perfect your mornings will be if the two of you finally tie the knot and live together. You can only keep that in your small heart, a really simple dream you wish you can achieve. Living with Ten for the rest of your life, why? Because you know he is the man made for you. But are you the woman made for him?

You finish your breakfast and as the washing machine finished its job in drying the clothes too, you hear his phone rings. Ten glances at the buzzing noise. You toss him a small smile before leaning in to kiss him and walking away to take the laundries. You pick up his shirt, Ten does his duty to wash the dishes and pan he used.

"Let me iron this quickly," You disappear to at least send him off to work in a nice attire.

Ten places the last dish on the drying rack and he starts to pack all of his stuffs, he brushes his hair and teeth, puts his cap back on and his eyes soften when he sees you coming back with a neat shirt.

He finally takes off his apron and with your help, put on his tidy sweet smelled shirt. Secretly Ten loves your laundry soap and that's one reason why he used your washing machine. He wants to smell like you!

"So, when can I see you again?" You ask as you fix his collar. You're facing him and only inches away from his nose.

Ten smiles and puts his hands over your waist, he leans in to stare deeper into your eyes, "Whenever you want miss! I'm only one call away," he winks.

Both of your face are slowly erasing the gap between you two and just as you close your eyes his phone abruptly kills the mood. You pull your face back and you can see Ten cussing at the caller.

"Damn Lucas! Such a mood breaker! I told him I am coming in 10 minutes," Ten presses the red button and pockets his phone. You burst out laughing, of course it must be Lucas!

"Well, guess you will want to go before Kun calls you! Thanks for yesterday and today and everything!" You hug him and bury your face on his chest. "I wish you can come often and do my dishes!" You taunt your tongue.

Ten ruffles your hair and kisses your forehead for the last time, "Okay, I need to go now. You also need to prepare yourself for work."

You nod and note the time, it's an hour to the store opening hours, you need to get ready.

"Bye love, take care! I love you." Ten walks to the exit after putting on his coat and shoes.

"Love you more!" You stand by his side facing by the exit door.

"Love you most," he winks and finally pulls his cap to cover his face and puts his mask on. He finally turns around and walks to the lift.

You return to your room, taking a bath and getting ready for another long week. You believe if you can get through this, your dream of living with Ten will be clearer and brighter.

Your day goes on and you cannot lie whenever you see him on social media, a website, a magazine, or a music show, even from the talks from your customers, you cannot throw the disturbing insecurities away from your mind.

Is our love hopeless?

Will the world accepts me as his significant other?

Will his family love me?

Will he even stay by my side, or will he found someone new who is better than me?

Those are the things you cannot spill to him that haunt you every time he is away.

You play with the promise ring Ten gave you on your two years anniversary. The dark minds foreshadowing your mind suddenly disappear just as you remember the same words Ten always recites, "You're the puzzle that fits into me, why would I let you go? Trust me and wait for me, I love you more than anything!"

With that, your smile erupts back into your face and the rainbow in your heart plus mind is back. You know you just have to trust Ten the same way he trusts you! Life will bring you two together if it is meant to be, and fate will also play a part.

Because Trust is everything you need for an everlasting love story right?

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