#I am not lactose intolerant but I am diabetic

[correct-minecrafters-quotes]

Sean(ForgeLabs): Never eat cheese in the eve of war

[gtzgoblin]

Just had dairy free "cheese" savory on my jacket potato because dairy gives me tummy problems even though cheese was my main source of joy in this fucking diabetic existence. It was nice, so props the chef, but I resent another bodily failure

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for eating a diabetic person's sugar-free chocolates?

I (18M) live with my mother. A few months ago, my mother got dumped by her boyfriend, who had been living with us at the time, and she had spent a lot of money to help despite not being financially stable herself. It was a very messy breakup, where he told her he hadn't been in love with her for over half a year and had been looking for a place to stay behind her back for months. I've been watching my mom cry over him ever since, it's clear he really hurt her. Hell, even people who were his friends first agreed what he did was shitty.

Shortly after, he moved out. He took most of his things with him, but a few got left behind- including these little sugar free chocolates he has sometimes because he's diabetic (type 2- he can still have small amounts of sugar on occasion). It's been a few months now, and he hasn't come back for those things.

I asked my mom about it a few day ago, and she said that every time she had tried to talk to him about coming back for the rest of his things, he had gotten angry at her or just stopped talking to her. This is pretty typical ever since they broke up whenever she tried to discuss anything serious with her. I got pretty angry about this, because I was tired of him treating my mom like shit. I basically said "fine if he won't come get them, I'll just eat them."

Since then I've eaten a few of them. I'm not diabetic myself, but I do have an intolerance to sugar (think the same effects as lactose intolerant people drinking milk or eating cheese, but with sugar). If I eat even a single candy bar, my stomach throws a fit for hours. I was honestly half hoping that maybe sugar free chocolate would be easier on me than real sugar, because I have a huge sweet tooth and would like to be able to eat things I enjoy without having my insides hurt every time I do. However, it still bothered my stomach a little (not as much as regular sugar, at least) so now I just feel like an asshole for eating a diabetic's chocolates because he was too rude to my mom to just schedule a time to come pick up his shit. Am I?

What are these acronyms?

[jakey-beefed-it]

So today's eclipse road trip was mostly good- we made decent time heading down there, but ran into unholy traffic on the way back that turned an hour and a half drive into a four hour drive.

On the way down, we stopped at this little dairy/deli type place and I was hungry, so I picked up some cheese curds and some pepperettes. And also a Tim Hortons version of a sbux Frappuccino.

Bear in mind that I am:

Diabetic

On meds for diabetes and blood pressure that have some. Side effects. Pertaining to digestion.

Lactose intolerant.

So by the time we got TO the place to see the eclipse, my guts were a bit rumbly. By the time the eclipse was over, they were clear: find a bathroom, broseph. Soon. But all the bathrooms were closed, or out of order.

So we got back into the car. And drove. And got stuck in the aforementioned traffic.

For

Four

Hours

I made it, I'm alive and unsoiled, but it required attaining enlightenment and transcending the needs of the body for a while. Do not recommend doing that again.

My wife is sympathetic about the traffic, but not the "oh jeez I gotta hold it" misadventure. Which, fair.

[potteryandpasta]

Macaroni and Cheese Bread Bowl

So! While I was sick and not really cooking, I ended up talking to my mother about having a nice, baked mac n cheese, like we used to make when I was a kid. We both missed it (it had been based on her mother’s recipe that she enjoyed as a child and had wanted to pass on to me) and decided “Well, why not mac some cheese?”

During the time we were planning our special macked cheese, she ended up finding this cool round bread in our Walmart’s bakery and as soon as I saw it I had the most brilliant idea.

“What if we make that baked mac n cheese, and serve it in a bread bowl?”

She loved the idea, and the plan was finalized.

Ingredients: -1 box wheat elbow macaroni (this was an accident, but we rolled with it since she’s diabetic and I was sick, we figured using the healthier noodles might be a good idea) -1 block colby cheese -A generous amount of lactose-free milk (I am, rather ironically, lactose intolerant) -Salt and Pepper to taste -(Optional) Grated Parmesan and Romano (can be mixed in, used on top to aid the crust, or both!)

Instructions: -Preheat oven at 350F -Boil the pasta, drain the water -Stir in the ingredience -Cook a bit, but don’t fully finish it on the stovetop -At some point, hollow out your round bread loaf (probably best done while the noodles are boiling) -Pour your cheesed mac into the hollow bread -On a preferably cast iron pan, bake until a nice golden brown crust has formed -Enjoy!

Opinions? Overall, it was pretty decent. I thought we could have used a few more cheeses, maybe some mozzarella and/or feta. She liked it alright the way it was, but couldn’t eat too much because her blood sugar. It actually took a few weeks to finish it off, during which time I saw the movie “Killer Klowns From Outer Space” for the first time. Weird movie, but better than I expected. We’ll probably be making this again in the future, with an updated recipe. I’ll post an update if/when that happens!

[daydream-reblog]

So I'm lactose intolerant (sometimes it's painful to my stomach and it's not good if my stomach gets upset), I have high cholesterol (which I'm like 12, NOT NORMAL, USUALLY FOR 50+ PEOPLE), and sugar problems (I come from a history of diabetes in my family, I just have problems processing sugar).

I almost never go out to get food from restaurants and such, but PLEASE if I ask for no milk or a low cholesterol substitute or something that doesn't have as much sugar, LISTEN TO ME.

Drinking dairy products while lactose intolerant can wash out all important minerals and nutrients out of your body (which I am slightly malnourished anyway so PLEASE DON'T-).

Eating way too many high-cholesterol products while you already have high cholesterol is not healthy. And I'm really young for high cholesterol. High cholesterol can cause heart attacks, strokes, and blockages. I have trouble breathing or working out because the blood has trouble getting to my brain and lungs. Sometimes I stand up too fast and have to take a minute to not be blind (my vision goes static and black). I just don't need cholesterol in my diet.

Sugar is not healthy for me either. Sugar can impact high cholesterol in a negative way, and coming from a family of blood sugar level problems, having a lot of sugar isn't helpful. I also just don't like the taste of sugary products that much? Which is also a personal preference, and if it was just that you should respect it anyway. I feel sick if I have too much sugar and once I threw up (and almost threw up or felt sick many times before) because of sugar.

I also don't or rarely eat meat products. Not because of dietary problems but I just can't handle meat for some reason. Once a year of couple months I would have something with meat. But usually, I use fish and seafood products as a substitute (I'm usually considered a pescatarian). I do not eat many fish products either, but I tolerate it. I just... Do not like the taste? You should respect that too.

DO NOT DO THIS.

This makes me so angry.

If you work in a movie theater and you do this I have no respect for you.

My younger brother is Type 1 Diabetic.

When we go to a movie theater, we always get him diet soda. If he were to get regular when we asked for diet, we would not give him the insulin he would need for it. If that happens, his blood sugar level could go so high he could go into a coma, go blind, or even die.

If somebody gave him regular soda instead of diet without telling us, that person could be responsible for a nine-year-old being killed or blinded.

Just thinking about that makes me so angry. I get scared every time we take him to a movie in case the people working there saw this picture and decide to do the same thing.

Please signal boost this so people know.

[peppermintquartz]

When I go to the coffee shop and get my order, i feel guilty, and the most intensive thing about it is me making sure to reiterate everything is made sugar free (there can be no added sugar at any step and the base ingredients need to be sugar free) and with almond milk. Those are the only things that I need to make sure are substituted in every drink I get and it's because I am literally diabetic and lactose intolerant. I NEED those substitutions and I still feel like shit about it. Baristas really are God Strongest Soldiers, stg.

i never worked as a barista because i can't endure the idea of someone needing to bastardize overly personalize their drinks "for the gram" when there are plenty of available options with specific substitutes like yours.

[disease-danger-darkness-silence]

Is an allergy to a medication a food allergy?

I am nowhere NEAR MCAS levels of allergens but I have to take levocetirizine all day every day. If I go without I am at urgent care because I can't breathe.

I'm basically Macaulay Culkin's character from My Girl, only I'm also diabetic and lactose intolerant.

Okay Wait I need to test something

[writer-in-theory]

i am lactose intolerant and diabetic. am i also having ice cream for dinner? no proof.

[romanian-atease]

Sunt diabetic/diabetică - I'm diabetic

Sunt vegetarian/vegetariană - I'm vegetarian

Sunt vegan/vegană - I'm vegan

Am intoleranță la lactoză - I'm lactose intolerant

Sunt alergic/alergică la... - I'm allergic to...

Nu pot mânca gluten - I can't eat gluten

Nu pot mânca nuci - I can't eat nuts

Nu pot mânca produse lactate - I can't eat dairy products

Nu pot mânca alimente picante - I can't eat spicy food

Este cușer? - Is it kosher?

Aveți lapte de soia? - Do you have soya milk?

Aveți lapte degresat? - Do you have skimmed milk?

[roboticutie]

Likely because of dietary restrictions, eating disorders, and allergies. It's something not many people think of when giving someone food. I see the string of logic, but I disagree with it wholeheartedly, in this context especially.

I'm gluten intolerant (been in the ER for it) and deal with disordered eating habits, but if someone had never met me before and baked me cookies without telling me whether or not there's wheat in them... I would just accept them and let the folks in my house who can eat them have them instead. Because it's still a nice gesture from a neighbor and how should they have known? It's on me to let them know/ask for clarification later, to not eat something that I am unsure is safe, and don't be rude about a gift when it's a gesture meant to start an acquaintanceship. The responsibilities when building communal relationships are different, but go both ways. They didn't know better and it was a nice thing to try to reach out with.

Ok, so to avoid being "ableist" in this situation, "everyone could strive to make GF foods for neighbors unless they know for sure that they can have wheat" might be your next thought, being vigilant against accidental ableism... So what flour do you use?

Almond? What about nut allergies?

Rice with xanthan gum? Not everyone can have that.

Do you know how to bake with the Robinhood GF flour (notoriously dry), or would you look for the Red Mills 1:1? Is there anything in there they can't have, though? Do you want to spend like 12+ dollars on the good stuff to minimize risk of messing up a recipe?

Speaking of moisture... Can they even have butter? Does it need to be lactose free? What if they don't even like chocolate chips? What if they hate raisins? What if they can't have sugar because they're diabetic? So no desserts, but what if they're vegetarian so no meat but they're allergic to fruits or soy? What if they deal with disordered eating and this makes them spiral?

These frantic thoughts pile up and often stop someone in their tracks from ever reaching out to make meaningful community connections at all.

It's okay to make mistakes when you try to reach out and make a friend. Even if a leaf gets stuck in their clothes or you accidentally swing too hard and smack their hand at first, I think you should still extend that metaphorical olive branch. If food is the way you want to do it, go for it, and be open to having that path to friendship corrected a little to learn more about what they need from a friend. Maybe they'd prefer art supplies as the item of gesture in the future, maybe they do have to avoid lactose. Maybe they were never allergic to any foods at all, and they have a healthy relationship with food, and you're worried over nothing. There's nothing wrong with asking about allergies or favorite foods first, either, if you're really worried and want to check.

But it is not ableist to try to do something nice as an introduction or a helping hand and accidentally messing up when you don't have a way of knowing that would be a problem first. Obviously don't go pushing your neighbour in a wheelchair around without explicitly being asked to, but this kind of situation is entirely different from that.

thought this was neat

[y0rkminster]

Factory Farms are the New Cigarette Companies

Big animal agriculture’s propaganda is actually really creepy when juxtapositioned with reality. 

Factory fish farmers displaced countless Inuit fishermen, and then spread the narrative that being vegan is anti-indigenous inherently. While there are anti indigenous vegans, there are a heck of a lot more anti indigenous omnivores. That doesn’t mean vegan anti-indigenous attitudes aren’t a problem; that means they are not intrinsic to veganism. Basically, you get jerks everywhere. They also spread the narrative that factory farming has something to do with sacred beliefs surrounding meat, which is utterly absurd. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I do not believe any culture on Earth considers cramming animals into tiny cages for their entire lives to be sacred. How insulting to imply otherwise! 

They also push the narrative that veganism is just for rich white hipsters. Ironically, white people are slightly under-represented amongst American vegans. In the US, whites make up 61% of the general population but 53% of vegans. Vegans are also significantly more likely to earn less than $30,000 per year than non vegans. 

This is particularly insidious. It targets PoC and economically disadvantaged people, two demographics who are *far* more likely to suffer from cardiovascular disease, diabetes, and other disorders that can be exacerbated by dietary cholesterol, fats, and the pro inflammatory properties of several animal products. Not to mention that lactose intolerance has a prevalence of 90-95% in people who are not of Northern European ancestry. The evidence is still in a nascent stage but dairy and other animal products are thought to be pro inflammatory and may contribute to many chronic diseases. It can also possibly exacerbate certain autoimmune diseases, like UC. 

Not to mention that people exploited in the industry are overwhelmingly PoC, many are undocumented immigrants, and virtually all are economically disadvantaged. While many people who work in meat processing are oaky, PTSD is fairly commonplace and de-sensitization to violence is a major issue as well. 

There is also heavy concern trolling about the safety of lab grown meat/dairy. Pretty ironic given that red meat is now recognized as a level one carcinogen. They also raise laughable arguments about sustainability while they are the least sustainable industry on the planet. 

They also raise hell about problems with plant agriculture, of which there are quite a few. However, there is no sin plant agriculture is guilty of that animal agriculture is not. 70% of crops go to feeding livestock. 

If you told me this time three months ago that I was addicted to dairy I would have laughed in your face. But I sure as heck am. Been dairy free since going vegan, but cravings are intense. They go beyond food cravings. Not everyone who consumes dairy is addicted to it, but food addictions are real and can strike slim people as well. Casein is a possible explanation. My medical history makes me more prone to this but I am hardly alone. Some people have even said that quitting dairy is comparable to quitting smoking, though addiction susceptibility to various substances (illicit or otherwise) varies tremendously person to person. Animal products are hard to give up, and that’s okay. 

Overall, 99% of animal products are from factory farms (ranges from 71% for cows to 99.9% for chickens). The minuscule percentage that are part of cultural traditions are not the typical target for vegans, nor should they be. So, beware propaganda. The meat and dairy industry is losing a lot of money as it is, and they know that lab grown products will be the end of them. They will 100% concern troll and spin narratives. 

Here’s the bottom line: People love hearing good news about bad habits, and finding convenient ways out of cognitive dissonance (”how can I love animals and eat them”). Factory farms already exploit this and continue to do so. You are not immune to propaganda.  

[onekisstotakewithme]

She draws maps too. Brilliant.

I can forgive the raisins they aren’t for everyone. I will tell you they’ve never bothered me. I miss the Dutchie 😟

Nanaimo ain’t what? Good? Say it. It’s a bar of freaking diabetes. Sickly sweet. Don’t like ‘em either. I like coconut but then it just goes off the rails with the custard. But I tend to prefer savoury things anyway. Savoury pastry especially. Chicken pot pie, Yorkshire pudding, etc

Here’s my real test of character: thoughts on tea?

Pear

All I know about the Dutchie is that A) my father continuously mourns them and B) they had them for the 150th anniversary in 2017 (says she with the insider knowledge of what donuts are coming to tims at any given time). I would gladly break confidence to inform you if the Dutchie returned

Nanaimo bars are... bad. They are bad. Butter tarts all the way.

Tea is delightful, I love tea. My Scottish grandmother got me started drinking it early (hence why I knew the word “civilized” at the age of two), but because I started young, I’d always have it with milk and sugar (don’t disown me).

Now that I’m older and more lactose intolerant, I just take sugar in it.

(I am however a habitual double double drinker so alas) - is a Tims order not a true test of character?

[britishassistant]

But I Like One Piece (18)

Something’s got to give eventually.

She just never expected it would be her.

It’s lunchtime, and they’re trying to navigate the strange, new dynamics that come from Ino trying to gain Sakura’s attention rather than the other way round.

She’s noticed that, despite bringing her normal lunchbox, Sakura has been picking at her food recently. As though she somehow finds it all somehow unappetizing.

It’s beginning to get a little worrying, so she brought something she knows the pink haired girl enjoys, just to make sure her blood sugar stays up at least.

She wordlessly holds out a skewer of dango to the pink-haired girl.

“Oh, no thank you.” Sakura says. “I’m on a diet—got to watch my figure you know!”

What.

“What?” Ino asks.

The wooden dango stick splinters in her fingers.

“What.” She says.

Over the blood rushing in her ears, she faintly hears someone go “oh no”.

“What do you mean, diet?” Her voice is as calm as she can make it.

Sakura flinches back, so she wasn’t as successful as she hoped she’d be.

Her tone is clipped when she replies, “You know, it’s not attractive to eat so much food, especially not unhealthy stuff. I’m working on fixing that. You should too, Mayu-chan, Ino-chan! We could be so pretty if we just lost a teeny bit of weight!”

No wonder you don’t have a boyfriend yet Tamara, the way you scoff down food like a pig.

She stands up, chair skittering away from her. She doesn’t grab Sakura’s collar, but it’s a near thing.

“Do you know when it’s acceptable to be on a diet?” She hears herself asking. “If you have food restrictions that it will kill you to violate, like diabetes or lactose intolerance. If your religion has foods that it’s not acceptable to eat, like pork or beef or animal products. If you want to improve your health by eating food to supplement an increase in activity, to build up protein for your muscles and iron in your blood. But thinking it’ll improve your looks...”

She hisses, “Open your mouth.”

“Wh-what?” Sakura leans away, hand coming up to try and cover the mentioned body part.

“M-Mayu-chan, hold on—” Naruto tries to caution.

She grabs Sakura’s hand, yanking her forward.

At this distance, her teeth don’t seem discolored and her breath doesn’t smell like bile...

“At least you’re not «bulimic».” She grumbles, dropping the limb. “So it’s just «anorexia» we’ve got to deal with. Shit.”

“W-what are you talking about, Mayu-chan?!” The pink-haired girl demands. “Those—those words, wh-what do they even mean?”

“They’re shitty eating disorders.” She tries to keep ahold of her temper. If she doesn’t know any better, it’s okay. She can be taught, she can be helped. “«Bulimia» is where you compulsively overeat and then throw up the meal. «Anorexia» is denying yourself food altogether. Both are symptoms of mental disorder, and done under the delusion that shitty starving will somehow lead to beauty. So why are you wasting food for this shitty delusion?”

Sakura flinches at the words “mental disorder”.

“T-th-that all sounds made up!” She blusters. “E-everyone knows that boys like thin girls best! My mom and Ino’s mom and all of Ino’s mom’s magazines say so!”

She throws her hands up. “What are you even talking about?! What boys?!”

Sakura’s eyes glance to Uchiha and away.

“Oh. Oh Sakura, no.” She says, despairing. “You’re—”

“What?!” Sakura cuts her off. “Do you not think I’m good enough?! Is the sidekick too presumptuous for trying to catch up to the heroine and the rival?!”

Okay, now she’s just completely lost.

“Sidekick?” Ino says, hands held up placatingly. “What do you mean, sidekick?”

Sakura laughs, a high and shrill sound. “Don’t pretend you don’t know! That’s all I’ve ever been to you! Just-just following you around, with no strength of my own! If it weren’t for you, nobody would even notice if I disappeared! Nobody would care! They’re all your friends, not mine!”

Ino shrinks back. “That’s-that’s not true Sa—”

“DON’T LIE TO ME!” The pink-haired girl’s chest heaves for a moment before the all rage in her expression and posture just...vanishes. Like she’s slipped on a mask.

It’s more than slightly disturbing.

Sakura exhales, a sweet smile on her lips. “I’m going to be a strong, ladylike kunoichi heroine on my own terms. Strong enough to beat all of you. If any of you have a problem with that, you can just keep your stupid mouths shut.”

So saying, she picks up her things and flounces to an empty table at the back of the room.

She pulls out a chair and resolutely turns her back to the rest of them.

There’s a moment of silence where they all stare at each other.

“...What just happened?” Naruto asks in a hoarse whisper.

She shrugs. It started out with vile words about diets and beauty that still set her teeth on edge, then went to Sakura’s awful taste in boys, then something about her not having friends?

That last one stings, honestly.

Ino curls into herself, looking miserable.

“She’s not a sidekick, she’s my friend, my best friend, but why, why—” The blonde girl looks up, pupil-less eyes lost and sad. “Am I a bad friend?”

“Nah.” Shikamaru says. “You’re fine. She’s just being troublesome.”

Chouji nods, reaching over the table to squeeze Ino’s hand and making gentle hushing noises as Ino’s shoulders hitch with sobs.

Sakura’s back twitches.

So she’s listening in then.

“I don’t get it.” Kiba complains, hugging Akamaru to his chest. “Why wouldn’t we want Billboard Brow to be strong? Isn’t she already strong anyway?”

“Ask Uchiha.” Shino says, stabbing a straw into his juicebox. “Why? Because he has repeatedly expressed disdain for Haruno’s abilities on the basis of her civilian status.”

“I have not!” Uchiha snaps. “It’s not my fault that civilians aren’t as prepared as clan ninja!”

“I rest my case.” Shino mumbles around his straw.

She massages the bridge of her nose. “Look, playing the blame game is not what we need right now. Not when our friend’s so intent on starving herself to death.”

“Is she?” Shikamaru asks, almost carelessly. “Our friend, I mean.”

There’s a quiet inhale around the table.

Sakura’s posture is tenser than a set tripwire.

“Of course she is!” Naruto slams his hands down on the table. “What kinda question is that?!”

“A rough patch is nothing to jump ship over.” She scoffs, biting into the spurned dango. “Usopp and Nami and Robin all had them, didn’t they?”

“And they all literally jumped ship.” Shikamaru mutters, though with less heat behind it.

“Gi-give her time.” Hinata murmurs diplomatically. “It’s-it’s awful, to be ho-hounded. Let her ha-have room to breathe.”

Ino blows her nose noisily on a napkin. Her eyes are bloodshot.

“Anything.” The blonde says shakily. “Anything she needs.”

Chouji leans over the table to give her a hug.

“Anything she needs” turns out to be close to two weeks of pointed silences and increasing misery.

Poor Lee has it bad, because he wasn’t even there for the big blowup. Sakura will at least be civil towards him, but the tension between his crush and Naruto and her with no remedy in sight upsets him, though he does his best not to show it.

At least they’ve finally found a store that will sell them the materials and instructions on how to build twelve smallish shrines that can withstand the elements, so silver linings.

They just need to buy the right colors of waterproof paint and some offerings and it’ll all be ready.

Just in time too.

Now at lunchtime, she feels increasingly keyed up at the sight of Sakura’s steadily diminishing portions, getting more and more agitated until digging her nails into her legs is the only thing stopping her from marching over there and— and—

And at this point she’d almost be more worried if this was all her than if it wasn’t.

It gets to the point where she pours it all out to Gai-sensei one morning during training, while Naruto and Lee are busy sparring.

Gai-sensei’s eyebrows furrow, and he’s quiet for a long time.

“Sometimes,” He says eventually. “My most cool and hip rival does not feel very youthful. There are days where he is fighting many battles in his head. So many that plenty of tasks become like perilous trials in his already burdened state. Do you know what I do?”

She shakes her head

He smiles. “I try to see what he needs. Some days, he needs privacy and time, so I give that to him. Others, he needs a reminder of the present, that the battles in his mind need not impede the Springtime of our Youth, so we undertake most youthful challenges together.”

He claps a hand on her shoulder. “Your rival is trying her best to blossom as you and Naruto and Lee have done. You merely need to be there as best you can for her, to judge whether it is prudent to give her time or to test her mettle against yours. Do not try to force it. A rival is an equal, someone who you trust to stand alongside you rather than someone you need to protect.”

“I’m not sure if Sakura’s my rival.” She admits, rubbing the back of her neck. “...but I thought we were equals. I just don’t know why she thinks that I don’t think she’s my friend.”

“You did say that her attempts to improve herself, however ill-advised, meant she was insane.” Gai-sensei points out.

What?

Oh.

Oh.

“I’m an idiot, aren’t I?” She says miserably.

Gai-sensei ruffles her hair. “Not to worry, Mayu-chan! Admitting you have a problem is the first step to being able to rectify it!”

She thunks her head against her knees and groans.

So she’s made mistakes and needs to make up for them.

The only problem now is working out how.

It’s something she puzzles over for most of breakfast, and on their walk to the Academy.

Gai-sensei said to let Sakura “test her mettle” if she’d had enough time to herself.

And those terms she keeps using—sidekick, heroine, rival—sound like something out of a comic book or cheesy novel.

Wait.

Narrative roles.

The part of her that’s been trained to break down literature and rebuild it into a coherent thesis begins ticking over the possibilities.

She cautiously grins to herself. “I think I know how to help Sakura.”

Naruto and Lee look at her with naked hope in their eyes.

It’s like her favorite quote says: The value in fairy tales isn’t that they tell us dragons exist—but that dragons can be beaten.

Fortunately for her, today is a sparring day.

Even more fortunately, her first opponent is Shikamaru.

He can see she’s up to something so he forfeits in record time.

When Sakura stands opposite her, she gives her best innocent smile while they lock fingers.

“Y’know, I still don’t get why you’re even interested in that guy. You’re about a million times prettier than him, you know.”

So that’s what pink hair looks like against a red face and thERE is a punch.

It’s wimpy compared to what she’s previously seen, no real force or form behind it.

“A-are your eyes working?” Sakura sputters, trying to regain her composure. “Of course he’s prettier!”

She grins, making no move to fight back beyond blocking or dodging. “Eh, you’re a ten out of ten, he’s a five on a good day.”

She thinks she hears Uchiha screech from the sidelines as Sakura tries to force her emotions back under the mask. She darts in and pokes her opponent’s cheek before darting away again.

The pink-haired girl makes a sound not unlike a whistling kettle and begins to chase her around the ring.

“You honestly think you can beat me as you are now?” She taunts, mentally cringing at the line. “You can’t win if you keep half-assing it. You’re better than this Sakura, I know you are.”

“No. I’m. Not.” The next kick actually whistles past her ear. “I need to get stronger so he’ll look at me. I need to get stronger so you and Ino-chan don’t get hurt again!”

She darts forward to flick her opponent’s arm. “And this is the best way? Constantly putting yourself down, starving yourself, playing weak to look “ladylike”? Could you even protect Akamaru by hiding your strength like this?��

A growl emerges from Sakura’s throat. “You wanna see strength? I’ll show you strength, shannaro!!”

She spreads out her arms, grinning. “Finally. C’mon heroine. Stop holding back and show me what you really can do!”

Sakura’s punch connects so hard stars burst behind her eyelids.

She stumbles back a step or two and spits the excess blood into her palm.

She blinks at the small white things that come with it, poking experimentally around her mouth with her tongue.

Chopper’s Rumble Balls.

Sakura’s actually knocked her front teeth out.

They’re only baby teeth, but still. She can’t really help her burst of slightly incredulous laughter.

And this—this bubblegum bruiser thinks she’s just the sidekick.

Whispery boisterous laughter echoes in her ears.

She feels like her grin is going to split her face in two.

The pink-haired girl is babbling, horror clear on her face. “Oh my gosh, Mayu-chan, are you okay?! I’m so—”

She holds up a warning finger. “Don’t. Don’t you dare apologize for that, Haruno. If you do, I’ll kick your ass, I swear to Luffy.”

Haruno Sakura stares at her, bewilderment, guilt and irritation flashing across her face.

Then she squares her shoulders.

“As if you could.”

Iruka-sensei calls off the match then and there before they can really get into it, unfortunately.

He sends her inside to wash the blood out of her mouth once he’s reassured that it was only her baby teeth she’s lost.

He seems perturbed when she mentions putting the teeth under her pillow for the Tooth Fairy. Telling him that the Tooth Fairy gives good children money for more than one tooth doesn’t appear to help matters.

She gets back outside in time to see Sakura rush at Ino with a grin that bares all her teeth.

Ino, for her part, stares at her friend with something like amazed awe in her eyes, and only very narrowly dodges a black eye at the last second.

Their fight can only be called “dance-like” in the sheer synchronization of throwing blows. Otherwise it’s nothing that can be called elegant, or Nami, Robin and Vivi forbid, dainty.

It’s one of the most beautiful things she’s ever seen. She thinks they might even surpass Naruto and Uchiha’s fights in terms of passion.

And now she sounds like Gai-sensei.

Maybe time to quit her musings while she’s ahead.

She sidles up to Naruto. “How‘s Sakura?” She lisps quietly.

“So awesome.” Naruto breathes almost without realizing it, transfixed on the girl in the ring.

She pokes him in the side. He jumps and scowls at her.

“Kaa-san’s gonna ban you from cooking again, believe it.” He informs her.

“Not if you don’t tell she won’t.” She replies, doing her best imitation of his puppy-eyes.

“I’m gonna tell.” Naruto says immediately, the traitor. “And I’mma tell Tou-san and Gai-sensei that you stood there and let Sakura-chan hit you.”

She breaks out in a cold sweat at the thought of all the extra kata her father and Gai-sensei will put her through when they hear that she was messing around in a spar.

She flops forward at the waist. “Ugh.”

Naruto snickers.

She straightens up when Sakura and Ino begin screaming at each other about protection and supporting even really bad romantic endeavors and what sounds like the plot of a romance novel and standing side-by-side instead of in front or maybe in front is okay if they fight for it?

She doesn’t quite get what they’re saying.

Judging by their faces, neither do most of the Lunchtime Group, the rest of their class, or Iruka-sensei.

Well, even if it doesn’t quite make sense to her, Sakura looks a lot happier, if bruised and bloody.

That’s more than worth losing her front teeth and a week of cooking over, no matter how much the latter pains her.

She fiddles with the teeth in her palm, running her thumb over the root. They’re always so much smaller than it feels like they should be.

“Did people of your world really believe there’s a fairy that collects teeth?” Naruto mutters to her as Sakura lands the decisive blow.

“Kids were taught to.” She lisps back, doing a bit of mental math as the pink-haired girl throws herself into the arms of her downed opponent, the pair of them sobbing their eyes out. “You’d get, like, one ryō for three teeth.”

Naruto pulls a face that manages to be disgusted and delighted at the same time. “Your world is so weird, Mayu-chan.”

She tilts her head to the side and nods, as Ino and Sakura limp out of the ring and Kiba takes some of her weight as they head to the nurse’s office. “That’s fair.”

Sakura doesn’t join them for lunch that day, but she does move one table closer from the back.

The next day it’s two tables closer, despite the grumbles from some of the other boys in class as she perches at the end.

It continues in this pattern until Sakura’s sitting at the table behind them, pretending badly that she’s not interested.

She doesn’t quite understand why. The way Shino tells it, Kiba apparently broke Sakura’s window the evening after the spars by throwing a first aid kit through it.

Sakura’s parents thought it was a sweet gesture. His Ma was Not Happy.

Despite that, the pair of them came to school the next morning looking happier than they had for weeks. Ino and Sakura have been walking home together too.

Hinata turns around. “U-um, Sakura-chan?”

Sakura cocks her head, but no more than that. “Hm?”

“I-if it’s not too much trouble, w-would you like to si-sit with us for lunch?” Hinata says.

There’s a tense silence as Sakura tilts her head, considering.

The pink-haired girl exhales gustily. “Yes please, Hinata-chan.”

Naruto cheers as she gathers her things and sits back down in between Hinata and Ino.

“Hey, hey, Sakura-chan, do you wanna come over to Mayu’s this weekend? We’re gonna be painting shrines for the StrawHats, it’ll be really fun, believe it!” He asks eagerly.

Sakura’s brow furrows, but the smile she gives to Naruto is genuine. “I-I’d love to. Thank you for inviting me, even after...I-I’m really sorry I said...”

Naruto just beams at her. “S’okay! You’re our friend after all!”

She grins into her cherries as Sakura gets up to give him a great big hug.

That afternoon, they don’t have their usual lecture.

Instead, Iruka-sensei leads the class down the hall for a sneak peek at a new addition to the Academy curriculum that would be implemented next year.

“Now this comes from a new company based in Yukigakure.” He lectures. “They were kind enough to sell these weapons to Konoha at half the price they were selling to other hidden villages.”

There’s several large wooden crate, with heavily stylized kanji and a logo of four thin diamonds arranged in a strange pattern printed on its sides.

The kanji reads: Tsuruku Industries.

She’s not sure if that’s supposed to be a pun or not.

Iruka-sensei carefully lifts the lid off of the crate, and pulls out some of the packaging covering what’s inside as everyone crowds around.

“The Council has decreed that all Academy students from next year onwards need to be at least proficient in these as they are in kunai and shuriken to graduate. You all will still be on the old graduation plan, so your jounin-sensei will probably be the ones teaching you how to use them.” He explains.

Uchiha asks him something, but she can’t hear what it is.

She’s frozen at the sight of rows of gleaming black handguns and clear cases of bullets neatly packed into the styrofoam, all decorated with four thin diamonds.

She doesn’t think she can breathe.

«What the fuck.» She wheezes, before the world goes wobbly and sideways.

[slightly-strange-girl]

Literally same.

Recipe be like "allergy friendly"

Me, intregued: oh? *clicks link and reads*

"Ingredients: sugar, raspberries, milk"

Allergy Friendly my ass

“This allergen friendly recipe is sure to be a hit with all your dietary restricted friends”

First ingredient, “hazelnut flour”.

Instructions for baking, “grease the tin with a suitable oil, I prefer peanut oil…”

This is either satire or an assassination attempt.

[sunflowermoma-blog]

Guilty Pleasure

Have you ever wanted something you can’t have? Yeah, me too. Usually its someone who is lactose intolerant with dairy, or a diabetic with sugar. Mine just happens to be a man. I don’t know how he did it, but I’m hooked. 

We have never touched other than a fist bump, or a friendly fist to the shoulder. But it’s almost like I can’t help myself when he comes in the room, let alone looks at me and talks to me. He makes me so uneasy.

The way he looks at me, his eyes are so soft. I can’t help but stare at them when he gets close enough. His smile could brighten up any dark day, and could change anyone’s mood in a single smirk. It is so hard not to take his laugh home with me. 

I wish telling him would make it easier, but its forbidden to explain what’s going on in my head. So for now I will have to take what I can get of him, and admire the man he is from afar. 

I cannot tell anyone about him, because it would be frowned upon. So here I am. I have to get it off my mind somehow, here starts my story.

He is my guilty pleasure..