#I am no longer mentally ill now<3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[irlbeanieboo]

How do you have both BPD and C-PTSD ???

My therapist told me those were the exact same thing

(not mad or anything just confused)

they’re a little different!! i personally seperate the two, or at least mention both of them here, because being traumatized has not led to just bpd with me and i think when it comes to the reasons i cope it spans to both of them. like some symptoms with c-ptsd i experience without as much correlation to bpd. hope this makes sense i’m honestly half asleep rn lol. but i’ve been meaning to just say less specifically that plushies help with my trauma coping and symptoms, feels odd having both mentioned on my acc yknow? people are odd about bpd. but there are differences between c-ptsd and bpd, while they are similar and can manifest because of similar things, there is a reason why they are different diagnoses! and in different groups too.

[odetolovers]

hello 💃

[zemnarihah]

i looked through my old blog for the first time in like years and it is so so funny. and so so sad. To see how excited i was about the scholarship that I lost literally my first semester of college.

[geezmarty]

and if I say aa2 is my favorite out of the phoenix wright trilogy. it has franziska von karma. it has phoenix smoking 5 packs a day going through his worst seasonal affective disorder yet. it’s got edgeworth coming back from the dead/doing his one year of guided meditation in europe like I am no longer mentally ill wright why are you looking at me like I killed your parrot we can do court chess again now. pull yourself together. it has possibly top 3 of gumshoe’s most insane and epic moments. it has yet again phoenix getting bullied in court by like three women simultaneously. introduces perfect baby angel pearl fey. fire extinguisher induced amnesia tutorial. franziska von karma is there I can’t stress this enough.

[ctwinsduo]

woe cwilbur be upon ye. as promised here are my designs for every cwil era/stage/what have you + my reasons behind each design. design breakdown will be under the read more :>

as a disclaimer going forward: these designs are heavily informed by my own headcanons (namely the nature spirit headcanon, which i will only briefly explain here- if you want more of a background on that here's where I first shared the hc and explained it a bit) i'll be honest idk how much of these hcs/analysis abides by canon? so if you prefer to closely abide by canon this may not be for you. having said that, let's get into this. So one question that may initially come to mind when looking over this is "Why a nature spirit?" which is a reasonable question all things considered. I've already gone over the Watsonian explanation in the past, so instead I'll cover the Doylist take- which is more interesting as it pertains to these designs. Wilbur, as I see her, is a character that has many faces- she warps and changes to embody the view of herself she sees as necessary for the situation, whether that be the revolutionary or the villain. Simultaneously he has this core that's deeply eccentric and often difficult for the characters around him to grasp- this can come in the form of benign weirdness to the struggles with mental illness we see him go through throughout his various arcs. There's this push and pull between the person they want to portray and who they are fundamentally that's always at play.

Them being a nature spirit embodies this to an extreme. As a nature spirit their physical form is informed by their self perception (the one that's warped by the role they feel they need to take) and their own mental state, both aspects of the character that are foundational.

Another question that may arise upon reading all of this is "Why not just make him a shapeshifter?" which is also a valid question. Truthfully this one is rooted heavily in my own ideas of the character, so you'll have to take that with a grain of salt. I am, unfortunately, prone to making shit up /lh With that in mind however, the reason I choose nature spirit over shapeshifter is that, the way I interpret it, it's much more... animalistic? Let me explain: the way I tend to see shapeshifters portrayed is either a. having a base form that's relatively humanoid and then multiple other forms or b. having no base form but still presenting as generally humanoid. As a nature spirit Wilbur has a natural (ba-dum-tsss) tie to well... nature, and all that lives within it.

She's this manifestation of the wilderness whose form isn't even naturally human, yet she shapes herself into something presenting as such. As a nature spirit Wilbur occupies this weird nebulous space between human and beast, never fully embodying either. I find this incredibly interesting for a character that wants to feel and to be treated as human so badly, one that also clearly resents being seen as monstrous (despite leaning into that perception of themselves)

TLDR; Wilbur's 50 contradictions in a trenchcoat (literally) and being a nature spirit gives these contradictions/masks/ect. a physical manfiestation Now that we're 500+ words of analysis in, let me breakdown each individual stage :3 /lh

Pre-SMP + L'manburg

The most "human" Wilbur ever gets here- technically these two are different designs/eras but they have similar design notes so I'm lumping them together here

During this stage of his life Wilbur has a fairly good handle on his shapeshifting and is consciously choosing to look more human

Small details like the fangs, pointed ears, claws, and pupils allude to an inhuman nature. I like to think there's something uncanny valley about them- they look human but the longer you look at them the more small discrepancies you notice

Both look relatively generic appearance wise, if you can't tell this was Wilbur's "I am a Normal Human Man era" but with slightly more gender /lh

Decided to stick Wilbur in a different outfit Pre-SMP than the actual skin most people reference, mostly because I thought it'd be fun. The trenchcoat follows her throughout her development

Lots of goofy ass patches and pins on the coat

I personally hc that Wilbur always has some sort of oversized clothes on because it's a bit like a security blanket for him, very grounding and all that- anyways that's what the trenchcoat is here

Limited notes on L'manburg era- main thing is the glasses; they got cracked in conflict and they just never bothered to fix em

Pogtopia

As a result of stress (and personal perception) Wilbur lost control over his shifting entirely

Wilbur views their nature as inherently monstrous, thus when they think of themselves as monstrous or evil they lose most of their human appearance

Much taller in this form than usual, this reflects both how she feels she's perceived and how she perceives herself (monstrous, scary, inhuman, ect. ect.)

Their height also serves to emphasis the claustrophobic nature of the ravine and especially the button room

Eye color changes from brown to red, yet again another thing which reflects his self loathing

Coat is the same one worn pre-smp, just with some adjustments

Pins & patches removed from the jacket (my friend suggested it saying that he "ripped them out because they were too happy" and I find that mental image particularly silly so it stays)

Covered in stains, partially because the ravine is just. awful. and partially because this thing is not taking care of herself even a little bit

Lenses are even more cracked than they were during the revolution

Ghostbur

This section has a lot less points then the others on account of Ghostbur being fairly self explanatory, but shhhhhh

Reverted to "base form" post death, form is extremely fluid as a ghost- she tends to shift depending on the topic of conversation or the person she's speaking with (Explain being: whenever she talks about "alivebur" she becomes more human)

Less of a note and more rambling: fox ghostbur is especially fun to me given the hatred Wilbur has for Ghostbur. Ghostbur physically reflecting the parts of Wilbur that they hate the most in themselves

For Wilbur their base form- just a normal widdle fox- represents vulnerability. It is quite literally a small, fuzzy animal with little means to defend itself and it is also the culmination of everything Wilbur is running from. Ghostbur embraces this form fully yet is seen as more palatable by the people around her than Wilbur ever was

Constantly leaking a jammy, blue substance from his eyes and the cut in his chest, yucky

Especially long sections of "fur" like their tail and the back of their neck are constantly "dripping" little wisps like rain

Post-Revival

Post-revival his shifting is still fucked up (thank the mental illness for that) but he's got a slightly better handle on it, enough to look semi-human

Eyes have reverted back to brown but their lenses are tinted red anyways (often looks red)

The coat makes a comeback, edges are all fucked up from the explosion

That funky little overcoat/cloak/ect. got yoinked by Niki

Disheveled appearance meant to reflect her rancid ass mental state- namely the hair and the facial hair. Hair is grown out because she can't be bothered to cut it (you bet that shit is full of knots)

Nasty awful smeared eyeshadow as a treat <3 (I just think he deserves to be a little cunty yk?)

Got a little tired near the end here which is why the points got a bit sloppy, maybe I'll add more at a later date who knows. If you made it this far I hope you at least enjoyed reading all of this :>

[themoonsbeloved]

Making this again

Please do NOT tag as *D*@ATIONS*

I've had little luck with my previous post so I'm making another one, this time condensed.

I am a south asian muslim woman who's been really struggling with mental illness (Complex PTSD) and chronic fatigue syndrome, and as a result have not been able to find or keep a job for the last 3 years. I'm at a point where my mental and physical health is so bad I can no longer keep trying to find a job and am now entirely dependent on my henna bookings as a henna artist, as well as current various sessional work I do in the community. I'm also a carer for my grandparents as of recently due to their health being really bad, so technically I am doing 4 or so different jobs despite everything. None of these are consistent enough to make regular income, and with how bad my health has been lately its been a struggle to maintain these jobs.

I was supposed to be hired last year by my friends boss as my last hope on finding an ideal temporary job which works for my disability and financial needs, but due to circumstances and his incompetence I'm left hanging waiting for him to contact me, despite reaching out multiple times and being told I will eventually hear from him soon. I now no longer know if and when he will ever get in touch with me as he does need workers, but my current mental and physical state means I can't do anything else.

I'm now reducing the amount of money I need for just my weekly therapy (£25pw) and lazer hair removal sessions, usually around £350-£400 for 8-10 sessions if there's a deal on (I suffer with severe hirsutism/pcos and body dysmorphia). This is all to just help me function and not succumb to my mental illnesses and harm myself the next few months, as these are the things I really rely on currently to not get worse.

Thank you so so much to those who did send money on my last post, please share if you can't give anything.

£0/£300

I will post the links in the next reblog

[rey-129-fan]

Gotham-Amity Co-op AU Part 3

Part 1 | Previous | Next

“Hola beauties, and welcome back to Fashionable History, I’m Paulina,”

“And I’m Star, and on this channel, we teach you how to be at the height of fashion, no matter what time period you find yourself in.”

“Now for our long-time viewers who missed our community posts, you might be wondering about the change in location.  Well, we are moving up in the world.  That’s right, fam, we are officially-

“College girlies!” The two shouted into the camera.

“Ah, such a big step,” ‘Star’ sighed.

“Indeed it is.  And to celebrate, let us dress up like we’re going to meet the queen of fashion herself: Marie Antoinette!”

***

“So you would think it would be hard to demonstrate Amity Park’s weirdness while no longer living there, but you would be wrong,” a black man said into the camera while walking down a hallway, his glasses fallen ever so slightly down his nose.  There were voices in the background progressively getting louder.  “You see, Danny’s mentor popped by this morning, and apparently, he decided that the perfect way to tutor Danny and piss off his bosses at the same time was to allow a bunch of college kids to summon a historical figure of their choosing to discuss their area of expertise.  Once a week.

“Jazz got to go first.”

The black man stopped in a doorway.  Much clearer in the background was a woman’s even voice.  “And Jazz, being the future psychologist that she is, picked the most sex-obsessed man in history.”

The camera flipped to show a young red-head sitting across an older man with a white beard in a blue three piece suit.  In the background was a younger man, his blue eyes glazed over as he sat there sipping from his mug, his head of black hair bobbing as he fought to stay awake.  Really, it wouldn’t gather a second glance, except for the tiny detail that the older man’s skin was as green as a sunburnt person’s was red.

“-indeed homosexuality is not an illness, and in fact the only link between it and mental health has been observed to be caused by familial and community reactions.”

“That is good to hear.  Indeed, many people throughout history were homosexual, and a lot of them did not show any other signs of mental illnesses.”

“It is.  However, with the recent pushes for public acceptance of those not heterosexual, many have come forward with sexual orientations beyond just hetero and homosexuality, including those that are attracted to both men and women at the same time, as well as those who experience no sexual attraction or are completely repulsed by the idea of anything sexual.”

The camera flipped back to the first man.  “She is explaining how psychology has developed in the last 100 years without trying to rip apart Freud’s work.

“This isn’t even the first time something like this has happened.  Occasionally, we’d get guest speakers that would turn out to be some famous author or pioneer in their field.  It’s how our English teacher got his copy of the Tempest signed by the original author.  I think this might be the first one that won’t end in a raid by government idiots in white, though.

“So yeah, we occasionally get to talk to dead celebrities and don’t bat an eye at it.  Amity Park is very weird.”

***

“Danny!  You left your cups in the sink again!”

“How can you tell it’s mine?”

“They’re glowing green and you’re the only one that drinks ectoplasm!  Now take care of them before you bring the food to life again!”

“Fine…”

The camera pans over to a goth woman giving the camera a flat look.  On screen, there’s some text that reads: ‘When your boyfriend forgets to clean off his dishes after his mildly radioactive smoothies.’

***

“Urgh!” Just die you stupid, lazy skeleton!”

“How long is this attack going to be!”

“I don’t care, because when it’s finally my turn, I am going to stab the dust out of this depressed sack of bones!”

On screen was a couch, and on that couch sat 3 young adults, two women and one man.  One of the women was Valarie Gray, US National Taekwondo Silver Medalist, was jabbing her thumb down on the d-pad of her controller, lips pulled back in a snarl.  The other was Samantha Manson, more known for the TikTok channel Our Strange Lives.  The man was a muscular blond.  All three were focusing on the screen, their eyes emitting faint light and Valarie’s teeth seemed to be getting sharper.

Quietly a blond woman walked on screen, a backpack slung over her shoulder.  The woman was Star Strong from Fashionable History.

“You guys are still streaming?”

“This boss is stupid difficult and Manson and Gray are the only ones willing to play.”

“What happened to the guys?”

“Fowley, Wes, Singh all had work.  Fenton got to the first boss and then lost it because ‘Goat Mom just wanted to protect us’ before getting a call from his lil sis asking for help.  Kwan is working on a lab with a guy from his chem class, and Kyle passed out a couple hours ago.”

“Stop dodging!”

“Wanna play?”

“Can’t.  Going to the library to study for a calc exam I have coming up.  See you guys later.”

“Later.”

“FUC-”

***

“And so, with this polaroid image, we have evidence to prove that-”

“Hey, Wes, do you have something I can use for a collage?  Oh sweet, thanks bro!”

“What?  No!  Kyle!  Get back with that! That was the proof I was going to use to prove the existence of Yetis!”

“Oh damn.  This is some nice creature work!  Danny, your friend has an incredible costume, man!”

“Thanks, Kyle!  I’ll pass it on!”

***

Tim paused the video right as Wesley Weston stood to chase his older brother.

There.

The red-head’s eyes had a slight glow to them.  Tim clicked over to the other images he had gathered of the Amity Park teens, all with their eyes glowing or other signs of something inhuman.

Tim had been introduced to this group by Stephanie when she found a martial arts demonstration Gray did that involved breaking multiple boards, all several feet above her head.  Stephanie had meant it as a ‘check out his cool person doing what we’re doing,’ but Tim noticed something.  All the boards were being held by seemingly the same person- or at least people dressed very similarly.  And not in a way where they’re sitting on a ledge above Gray and are switching out the board each time she broke one.  More that there were multiple companies of the same white glove all holding a board and all floating several feet above where they should have been.  That was already a little weird, but it could’ve been some special effects or just a uniform.

No, what caught Tim’s attention was the quick glimpse of the face of one of the board holders.  It was youthful- late teens- but with paper white hair that showed no signs of bleaching.  Now these features would have been a thing to cement the mysterious person in Tim’s mind.  But it wasn’t that.

No, what got Tim to do some digging to find out about a previously unknown supposed hero from a small town that has been blacked-out by the US government, was his eyes.

His calm, glowing Lazarus green eyes.

***

So we finally get a taste for the shenanigans our liminals are up to. Sam, Tucker, and Danny all share a TikTok where they show off how weird the other two are and how weird their town is. Wes is trying to prove cryptids exist, which Kyle ruins. Dash has a gaming stream that most often Kwan joins in on, and Paulina and Star do dress history. Oh, and Valarie is a national taekwondo because karate has only been an event for one Olympic games, but taekwondo has been an event since 2000 and Val seems more like a kicker than a thrower. Plus, I actually took taekwondo when I was younger.

We do get another Bat showing up at the end. There is absolutely no plot, however, so who knows where this is going. Certainly not me!

I'm still looking for names (please, I need them). As for majors:

Jazz-Psych (obviously)

Kyle- Liberal Arts (I wanna put him in accounting, but Liberal Arts works for now)

Tuck- Comp Sci

Danny- Poly Sci, minor in Astronomy

Sam- Double Poly Sci and Environmental Science

Val- Criminal Justice

Dash- Undecided (both me and him)

Kwan- Pre-Med for now, though he wants to do Child Development/Education

Paulina- Fashion Marketing

Star- Sports Science

Mikey- Music

Wes- Journalism

[worldchampgameco]

I've been trucking away all winter on my next big project, BLOOD BORG, and I'm one month away from hitting go on Kickstarter IT'S LIVE ON KICKSTARTER NOW so I wanted to share it here.

Blood Borg is a vampyric gutter punk ttrpg built on the sturdy back of swedish doom metal rpg MORK BORG, inspired by early 00's vampire media like True Blood and Buffy mixed with punk nihilism like SLC Punk and Uncle Peckerhead.

This game reflects a lot of similar themes of one of my favorite other releases, Cybermetal 2012, in that it focuses on the lives of everyday people who are objectively not heroes who struggle to survive in an antagonistic world. Cybermetal was intended as a reflection on my 30's and current way of life: finding community and trying to do good by one another. While writing, I sort of discovered Blood Borg is a reflection of my 20's: the idea that we are young forever and never going to die, running through alleys at 3 am to nowhere, pulling day-old bagels from the dumpster like we discovered gold, and yet feeling the discordance of chronic mental illness compounded by the regular pains of growing up and the futility of fighting back against the inaccessible systems that run the world.

A longer more involved artist statement is one of the hidden stretch goals for this project, I'm excited to write at length about what these things mean to me and how they are cooked into the systems of the game.

I'm really proud of Blood Borg and it does what a lot of my games aim to do: engage philosophically with what it is to be a person in a society, the importance of support communites, the otherness of being for better or worse, all while simultaneously being a gonzo blast of a game that is fun as hell to play.

APRIL 9, Blood Borg launches on Kickstarter. I'll have the beautiful hardcover book, a screen-printed variant cover, a bunch of fun merch, and more available. Visit bloodborg.com to pre-save and get notified on launch.

Blood Borg is designed/written by myself, Adam Vass, and illustrated by Mitchell Van Dyke in Grand Rapids, Michigan.

[themultifandomgal]

Kelly Severide- Finally

Kelly and I have been married for 3 years now. We met because of my brother Matt joining firehouse 51, then Kelly and I dated for many years before he proposed. Our wedding was a beautiful day and filled with so much love.

After a couple of years of marriage we decided that it would be time for us to start a family. Unfortunately this took a lot longer than expected. We even went to the doctors to find out if there was anything wrong. They just said that for some men and woman it can take longer and to come back in a year if we are still yet to conceive or if we struggle to carry full term.

Of course seeing negative after negative pregnancy test it really effects you mentally. So we stopped taking pregnancy tests so regular. We will only take one if I think I could be pregnant.

I wake up feeling off like I've drank to much. Headache and nausea. Rolling over I place my hand on Kelly's side of the bed, but I'm greeted by the bed being cold. That's when I remember that Kelly had to head off to work early this morning. I groan sitting up, my head spinning as I do, I swallow dryly feeling so ill. Slowly I crawl out of bed and go into the bathroom to get myself ready for the day. Thankfully I work from home so I don't have to go out anywhere.

I'm typing on my laptop when I have to quickly run to the bathroom to throw up. Which weirdly makes me feel immediately better. I clean my teeth getting rid of the nasty taste in my mouth and go back to my work.

I spend the next few hours working, but when my day of work ends I'm absolutely exhausted so decide to take a nap before Kelly comes back home.

This goes on for the next few days which does make me wonder if I could be pregnant. So while Kelly is at work I route around in one of the draws for some pregnancy tests that I bought months ago. When I find them I pee on the sticks and leave them on the back of the toilet before going back to work.

I forget about the tests for a couple of hours before I have to go to pee again. I pick them up not thinking that it will be positive, but when I see the little plus sign on all of the tests I am shocked. This is the first time I've ever gotten a positive pregnancy test, but still not wanting to get Kelly to excited I want to make sure that this is true. So that day I ring up my doctors and book an appointment for the next day. However I'm going to have to sneak out because Kelly is off.

The following day I wake up in Kelly's arms making me smile. I turn around to face him and brush some hair out of his face making him sigh and pull me closer

"Morning" he says in his gruff morning voice

"Morning" I reply placing a kiss on his lips "what have you got planned for today?" I ask

"I'm staying home and cuddling you all day. I've missed you" I giggle at his reply

"I've missed you to, but I've go a couple of jobs to do this morning"

"Like?"

"Well I have to go to the bank, then pop to the grocery store"

"I'll come with you"

"No" I say way to quickly causing Kelly to frown "I just mean it's going to be boring and you've been working really heard the past few days. Why don't you sleep in" Kelly frowns not buying what I'm selling

"What's going on?"

"Ok you caught me. I am actually getting you a surprise but I'm not telling you what it is so you'll have to wait"

"Ok? Why?"

"Will you stop asking me questions. Go back to sleep I won't be to long" I place a kiss on Kelly's lips before getting up and getting dressed.

So I'm pregnant! I run to the store and buy a gift bag, some dippers, wipes and baby bottles. I then head back home with all of the 'gifts' in the bag and head into the house

"I'm home!" I call out and Kelly is quick to greet me with a smile. He wraps me up in his arms causing me to giggle at his affection "go sit down for your surprise" he eagerly leaves my side and sits down on the couch still with a wide grin on his face "ok close your eyes" I say and he does. I place the bag on his lap and tell him to open. He puts his hand in and the first thing he pulls out are the packets of wipes

"Baby wipes? You trying to tell me to wipe my ass or something?"

"No. Keep going" next he pulls out the baby bottles. He frowns taking out the box of diapers. He looks at me still frowning, but a look of realisation crosses his face as I keep smiling at him

"Are you...? Are we...?"

"Yes. I'm pregnant" Kelly is up in an instant and spins me around then kisses all over my face

"I love you so much!"

"I love you to Kel"

"I'm going to be a dad"

"Yes you are. We're finally getting what we wanted"

[vestaclinicpod]

Audio Drama Sunday - 22nd December ✨

I have been SO ill this week oh my god, I can’t even express how much hands this virus has 🤧 Thank you to all the shows who have kept me company this week!

🌲 @hellofromthehallowoods (178) Olivier!!!! Oh, it is breaking my HEART that his parents essentially pulled him out and dropped him in bloody France with no more power and no way of finding out what happened to the rest of the expedition. He doesn’t even know about Riot 😭 Also, I wish the gang had just been told the truth about that chapel because, my god, if it’s not Marco that goes wandering in there, it’s definitely going to be Hope!! Eek, Cole, man!!! You are not showing that you understand any of the principles that made Clem a good detective!! She had a process and a Shelby and years of practice!! You, sir, are going to fuck this up! We obviously now know for sure that Heather was one of the quartet and I feel like Ignatius is probably one because of the fire. Who knows! The game is still definitely afoot! 

🦋 @remnantspod (20) I was warned that this episode would break my heart but did I heed that warning as I listened on my walk through the city centre? No. Did I pay the socially embarrassing price for that hubris? Maybe!! Pushing down the trauma of that remnant leads to some qs from me (please share if you have thoughts!!). We know that Stephen Grenville was just one of many names that the keystone character was using - do we know if the man in this remnant was the ‘original’ one or a ‘fake’ SG? I’m thinking about what he said about Celine’s paintings and her being unable to stop her own style peeking through, I didn’t catch a flash of the Perry/Stephen/Apprentice in this man. I feel like it would add such an interesting layer if the murderer we know about was stealing identities from nasty people. But maybe that's wishful thinking! Does it make the murdering better if there's a good reason?? Idk! No? I might need to dedicate myself to a relisten sometime soon! 

🎃 Waiting For October by @monkeymanproductions (2.5) Ah, Poe. I love that there are still people fond enough of him to listen to his story no matter how irritating he is generally! I am definitely not well read enough to catch all of the references to other authors and stories but I found his cawing belligerence amusing all the same!! I’m looking forward to what’s next for Karo and Yvonne! 

🎙️WTNV (260 - December Monologues) Such a great time of year. I love hearing from characters we don’t catch up with as much like the Faceless Old Woman. I don’t know what’s about to happen with Steve, but I am buckled in and ready to find out!! 

🍾 @ameliapodcast (39) Amelia and Alvina are just on a prison tour at this point! Sometimes there are quotes that you just need to immediately add to the mental bank and “I piss on your mother's grave and wipe my ass with your birth certificate!” is 100% one of them 😂

🧳 Travelling Light @monstrousproductions (Q+A part 2)  my three take away points from this second part of the Q+A were 1) complete gratitude that Hero and I are on the same page about Scarry (who will most certainly return in late S2 right?). 2) I am soooo intrigued about your vague references to Olí and the Traveller’s relationship in S2 AND 3) Matt, that impression was genuinely horrifying. Thank you. 

🌵 @desertskiespodcast (1-4) I have been putting off listening to Desert Skies for too long because I knew it would make me emotional. Until Leon @tellnotalespod very correctly told me that a few tears are so worth it for the rest of the experience of listening to the show. I’m only a few eps in but I absolutely adore the balance of humour and heartache. I’ve literally had these characters for 2 hours and I would already kill for them!!

Have a lovely week, everyone! The days are getting longer and the nights are getting shorter!! 🫶

[abysbal]

COMMISSIONS CHANGE

Hello everyone! I’ve recently hit a massive bump with mental health, so I’m changing commissions slightly. This isn’t affecting currently unfinished commissions.

I’m a mentally ill disabled transgender dude and due to my current mental state I’m able to / am being prevented by my family from getting a normal job, I’ve been unable to start testosterone despite getting things in place to do so because of lack of money. I’m meant to be getting a paid therapist soon to help with my mental health problems, but have been off my medication for 8 months now due to it linking with my current blockage brain wise. Commissions are Quite Literally the only way I get money and would appreciate any support I can get

Sketch Commissions:

These are now at a base rate of £5, I don’t have a lot of energy right now, but I can do sketches and I’d like to mainly focus on sketch commissions if I can help it

Example of a coloured and non coloured “sketch”:

Chibi Commissions:

Still at £10, nothing has changed here, these are easy for me to do (and I like doing them) so I don’t feel like changing them.

Icons:

still £20, but I’m only offering 3 slots, these take a lot of energy I don’t have in excess right now, and might take me longer than 2 weeks to finish

Actual Full Pieces:

These are now £50, and I’m again only offering 3, again, these can take me a while to complete, and will probably take me up to a month to finish, please only get one of these of you don’t mind waiting that long

Again, I can’t get a job, so any support is really appreciated and I’d be grateful if this was spread around or I got some commissions

Kofi link

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

Arcana Brainrot: Blog Rules, Masterlists, Playlist, & Requests Guidelines

Come chat on the Discord server!

Current MC ask game

BLOG RULES:

My inbox is always open for anybody to share their thoughts or ideas! This blog is largely archival now, though, so prompts will likely not get written.

I don't think it needs to be said but hate isn't welcome here. Of any kind.

Please also keep in mind that this blog is PG-13, so whatever comments you make on it will likely be seen by minors. I take their safety seriously, so if there's anything grossly X rated in the comments (I don't see why there should be) I will delete it. If you continue to comment things like that you will be blocked :)

With my older brother rant out of the way, please enjoy the results of me trying to cope with a truly Vesuvian obsession :D

MASTERLISTS: oldest to newest, I'll do my best to update as I post.

All quotes for Arcana characters sent in have this tag: #arcana brainrot quote collection

Because of the link limit for posts, you can find the masterlist for all full headcanons below:

The Arcana HCs : Brainrot's Masterlist

The Arcana HCs : Brainrot's Masterlist, Pt 2

And here is the masterlist for all my mini-prompts, answered ask arcana style:

The Arcana Mini-HCs: Brainrot's Masterlist

The Arcana Mini-HCs: Brainrot’s Masterlist, Pt 2

The Arcana Mini-HCs: Brainrot's Masterlist, Pt 3

The Arcana Mini-HCs: Brainrot's Masterlist, Pt 4

The Arcana Mini-HCs: Brainrot's Masterlist, Pt 5

The Arcana Mini-HCs: Brainrot's Masterlist, Pt 6

A masterlist for drabbles, with an explanation at the top for how they work!

The Arcana Drabbles: Explanation and Masterlist

The Arcana Drabbles: Masterlist, Pt 2

All the recipes posted by the originals devs from the Arcana universe, with pictures of my own creation attempts and descriptions of how it went!

The Arcana Food

Worldbuilding/character analysis essays ^.^ (not a comprehensive list atm, unfortunately)

The Arcana Essays: Brainrot's Masterlist

Finally got around to fleshing out my self-insert enough to make him a proper MC/ OC!

Bainrot's self-insert MC (Drue)

Vesuviella: my first fanfic. don't get your hopes up (updated sporadically)

Summary: Julian decided to write his own version of Cinderella to be performed in the Community Theatre, and then recruited MC to help him cast the rest of the M6 in the leading roles. Chaos ensues. (There is no determined love interest, MC is friends with the M6 and M6 are all thirsty for MC.)

Vesuviella: All Parts

Arcana Brainrot Playlist: a compilation of all character song suggestions in one Spotify playlist, kept up to date!

Arcana Brainrot Playlist (Spotify)

Arcana Brainrot Playlist (YouTube)

REQUEST GUIDELINES - NO LONGER TAKING REQUESTS

Generally, I pick from what's in my asks and write what sparks inspiration. If there's an idea you'd really like to see written, you're welcome to message me directly about it! ^.^

I don't write about toxic/abusive relationships or dynamics between MC and the M6 (I get the appeal, I'm not judging, but it's not for me)

I don't write for M6 x M6 ships - side character ships are on the table, though!

All of my work is PG-13. (yes to romantic/sensual themes and references to painful experiences, no to explicit matter or glorified violence/pain/death/toxicity)

I'm willing to do research for topics I'm not familiar with, but there are plenty of things I can't write about just because I haven't lived it and I know an hour of research wouldn't be enough to be accurate (and respecting other people's experiences is important)

I am unfortunately very familiar with what it's like to have trauma/mental illnesses. That said, while I'm very happy to explore how that impacts MC and their relationships, there are some prompts I may take a very long time to do or just not write at all because they would mess me up

In general, keeping the prompt relatively short (a sentence to a paragraph) helps me organize them better! The same goes for asks sent with a visible blog - if I have questions, I can reach out to you for more details! ^.^

Both my asks and messages are open because I love hearing from new people! If you abuse that you will be blocked :)

All of the above points have reasons for them, and are therefore subject to change. If you have an idea that you'd really like to see and you're not sure about, just message me! I can either tell you why I can't do it or I can make an exception depending on the case

RELEVANT FANDOM HAPPENINGS

(I don't do drama on my page, but these are some posts that provide transparency and accountability for some of the things I've been caught up in)

To the Arcana Fandom, From Brainrot

An update on Rai/Kip

[dr-spectre]

What’s the different between hypnosis and brainwashed? Sorry, I just love your Callie obsessed and I don’t understand the different between the two

You don't understand the difference between the two? Don't worry, i got you.

Let's start off with brainwashing. In most definitions of it, it is described as pressuring someone systematically to adopt radically different morals, ideologies and behaviors via forcible means against a person's will, knowledge and consent.

Now let's get into hypnosis, it is described as a state of deep relaxation and focused concentration, where the subconscious is more open to suggestions and it's sometimes used as a form of therapy to treat addictions. It is not some stage act where you can get someone to get naked on stage, that's not how it works. It is not some thing where you swing a clock around and go "you are getting veryyyyy sleepy" and now you control someone's mind, nope, that is a common false assumption about hypnosis.

One of these terms is something used in therapy, the other is used in cults and political/military circles. The two are very different and have different connotations.

The main thing with brainwashing is that there is a forcible/ non consensual aspect to it where the individual doesn't want their mind to get changed. However in hypnosis, suggestions that are given to a person in a hypnotised state must not go against a person's will or morals otherwise the person will not listen to the suggestion, IT IS A VERY IMPORTANT DISTINCTION BETWEEN THE TWO!!!!!!!!! VERY VERY IMPORTANT!!!!

Brainwashing is against someone's consent while hypnosis REQUIRES consent and is not some form of mind control. That's the major difference between the two. Hypnosis is an altered state of conscious while brainwashing is someone's mind literally getting systematically reconditioned until the person's old morals no longer exist.

You can see now why i have problem with Callie being called "brainwashed" during Splatoon 2 because she canonically said to Octavio, "okay fine, I'll hear you out." You don't hear people who are getting brainwashed "yeah sure I'll hear out your points!!!"

You cannot use the word brainwashing for Callie's circumstance because her dialogue in the relationship chart literally goes against the definition of the word itself and using that word treats Callie more as a damsel or object rather than a character who just needs help. I'm tired of Splatoon fans and casuals pushing that word around towards my comfort character when there's a ton of evidence to say otherwise. I am getting REALLLLLLLLLL FUCKING TIRED....

"But Marie sai-" I know, she said "brainwashing sunglasses" in the English version I KNOW!!! From her perspective she would obviously think Callie was brainwashed by the shades, she has no other information to go off of, doesn't mean she is right and WE SHOULD BLINDLY TRUST HER PERSPECTIVE!!!!!!!!! YOU'VE EVER SEEN AN OVERREACTING FAMILY MEMBER BEFORE?!?!

Callie was hypnotised, full stop. Nothing more. Nothing less.

The whole "i remember" thing is not because the shades brainwashed her and removed her memories, it's just that Callie is in a mentally ill state PLUS in a hypnotic state where she's very concentrated and focused. The shades being shot off of her is like you writing an essay in class and someone smacks your eye. Callie looks like she has a headache and it takes a while for Callie to ""come back to her senses"" where she starts thinking a little bit more rationally. Her hearing the Calamari Inkantation floods her brain with good memories and positivity as the song has mysterious and mystical elements to it, Callie gets pumped up and all of that darkness in her head clears away and she goes "i remember! YEAH!!!"

The ONLY character you can argue was brainwashed in the Splatoon universe, is Agent 3. That's the ONLY ONE i may allow.

But even then they say "they have been hijacked." As in Tartar has taken direct control over Agent 3's body and it's not reallyyyyy brainwashing because Agent 3 was unconscious and probably had zero idea on what was going on until they woke up on the helicopter at the end of Octo Expansion.

What about Marina Agitando? Possessed by an ai after getting knocked unconscious. Not brainwashed or hypnotised!!! Marina was asleep during her time as Marina Agitando.

CAN WE STOP THROWING WORDS AROUND LIKE THEY MEAN NOTHING!?!? Stop using that word to describe "Splatoon character but evil." No. Enough. ENOUGH!!!!!!!! STOP!!!!!!!!! I AM GETTING SICK OF IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(I'm not yelling at you anon btw lmao. I'm yelling at everyone else, thank you for the ask!)

[horror-beeings-artandwriting]

Pinned post please read!!!

Quick thanks to @cafekitsune for the dividers and @adornedwithlight for the support banner

Hi hello, not like I’ve done this 3 million fucking times!

I’m Bee! I’m a 17 year old girl! I use she/her pronouns, and am straight! I’m a writer and artist!

My asks are always open so u can just send me anything ya want as long as it ain’t nsfw lol

Here’s my cool persona >:3 I'm multifandom so my fandoms i write for change a LOT

Boundaries

Basic Dni criteria

DNI Proshippers(ur disgusting. Get help)

DNI Dark shippers(get help dawg..)

DNI Zoophiles(*Minos prime voice* DIE)

This blog is made for mature audiences! plz don’t interact with any of my posts if ur uncomfortable with mature topics!! <3 (also like…13+ duh- cuz TOS)

DNI ANTI LGBTQ U GUYS SUCK BUTT.

Just because you follow me or send me a request doesn’t mean we’re friends don’t treat me as such.

I am NOT an animal. Don’t use “pspsps” or “come here girl” when addressing me.

No your mom jokes plz if u send one I’ll tell you why and you’ll feel like shit.

Plz don’t try to be mean to my brother @hunter-the-sad-skeleton. He sends stuff here. If ur mean to him. I’ll put cottage cheese in ur socks. (This is a threat)

I have NO MONEY. To my name. I can’t send u anything so plz don’t send me donation asks!!

Do not sexualize me no matter what, even when I turn 18, only I can do that to myself. Nor do I really plan on posting rules 34

Don’t ask me about my gender, or sexuality. I am a cis Demi straight girl just let me vibe.

I have been diagnosed with. many a mental illness(c-ptsd, severe depression, anxiety, chronic panic attacks, etc) I am on meds for these. Be kind if I seem at all out of it.

Plz block the #bee should shut up tags if u don’t wanna hear about my mental health!!

Plz DO NOT self promote on my page, idc if ur working on a project similar to mine. Keep that to yourself.

I literally love getting random QNA asks, or just random convo asks, SEND THEM TO ME PLZ

if u don't follow these ima block u <3

Now onto request stuff!

Are asks open?: Yes

Are Requests open: yes

How many requests do I take at a time: 5

How many requests do I have currently: 0/5

Do you take QNAs?: Yes and they are always open!

How to request:

Writing request: send in an ask, saying what character you want, if it’s x reader or canon x canon, if it’s platonic, romantic or familial, the pronouns of the reader if there is one! Along side if you want, headcanons, one shot, Drabbles etc.

Art request: send in an ask of what character you want to be drawn, and if it’s a doodle page or a single doodle!

Note: I can and will refuse asks if they make me uncomfortable and or don’t have ideas for!

Fandoms I write and draw for!

If this emoji 🎨 that means I only am doing art for the fandom rn!

Phighting(including ocs)

Forsaken(including ocs)

My ocs/original stories

Ultrakill

Crk (including ocs)

Blocktales(including ocs)

Dandy’s world(including ocs)

What I will write/draw:

Fluff

Angst

Headcanons

Oc x reader(only my ocs)

Canon x reader

My mutuals ocs

Gore/scars

My ocs!!!

What I WONT write/draw

Smut/r34

Child x adult (you’re disgusting if u like/support this./srs)

Animal x human (you’re disgusting if u like/support this. /srs)

Cheating

Abuse fics

I WILL NOT DRAW UR OCS IF I DONT KNOW U!!!

Family fics (anything to do with family such as child reader or character being fatherly/motherly mainly motherly)

Romanticizeing mental illness

Species that don’t pass the harkness test(this is about reader so no like straight up animal readers)

Suicide fics(finding you committed)

Extra info

I have adhd, and dyslexia so if I misspell or things take longer I’m sorry!

I have depression so sometimes I post about my feelings on here! Please block #bee should shut up if you don’t wanna see that shit.

F/O List I have extremely low empathy to no empathy due to childhood trauma! (also some genetic stuff) So sorry if I come off as rude I'm trying to get better!

I will post about characters I’m unhealthy about here. Don’t @ me

Discord server link: https://discord.gg/5GPeHJ8dfj

My awesome friends:

@chocxy-prince @nn-the-doodle @xho-the-scribble @hunterwritesstuff @beatrixblog

Anyways hope you enjoy my blog! :3

[thetreestumptherapist]

🎵YOU CAN'T TAKE THE SKY FROM ME!

So, I finished Firefly the other day and am just now getting to posting about it. I had started a draft while I was on like episode 8, but never got to publishing it.

My thoughts on and related to Firefly:

NATHAN FILLION

So, this is the show the internet is mad about. WELL, ME TOO!

Theme song ingrained in my brain within 3 episodes. Like, I felt like I knew it from a past life and couldn't remember the words but I knew it with my soul, type of ingrained. I studied the theme hard so I could sing along with it during the short time I watched the show.

(At episode 6) I like this show. Mentally I know this show is short. Emotionally I am just now getting deeply invested and setting myself up for heartbreak.

I need to go back and watch all the other Nathan Fillion things I have watched and look for all the references to Firefly that I missed.

(On the last episode and after the show) Gorram you Fox! Even Swiper has more decency than you!

In examining my own preferences of steampunky themes and apparently cop shows (Can't wait for Rookie season 7), I now need a steampunk cop show.

Having watched Warehouse 13 and The Librarians directly before watching Firefly, and seeing how well Fillion plays the aloof, loyal, caring, can't-keep-his-hands-off-the-really-cool/shiny-and-probably-dangerous-artifact type characters, I now need an Indiana Jones type adventure, but with Nathan Fillion. Infinite bonus if it has Alan Tudyk, Gina Torres, Adam Baldwyn, Jewel Staite, and Morena Baccarin starring in it. I would also love if Sean Maher, and especially Summer Glau could also come back. I really want to see Summer in a not mentally ill role, but she mostly does bit parts in stuff that I am not really interested in.

Individual thoughts *SPOILERS*:

Jayne needs to start thinking with his brain, and not the thing between his legs.

I absolutely LOVE when Mal threatens Jayne after he tried to sell River to the Fed's. "You turn on any of my crew, you turn on me" and "Next time you stab me in the back, have the guts to do it to my face" are beautiful quotes that I will be making a part of my personality despite not having a ship, crew, or having been stabbed in the back

It's interesting to see what aspects of Fillion's personality go with him from character to character. From Mal, to Castle, Cayde-6, and John Nolan. They all care deeply about their crew even if they aren't really good with showing affection, and I can tell that Nathan cares about his people too.

I haven't watched the movie yet. I have it, I just haven't watched it. I've also heard bad things about it. But, I plan to watch it anyway. If it ends poorly I will absolutely be making a headcanon.

I wish so bad that it had lasted longer, but alas, 14 fantabulous episodes, a movie, and our imaginations is all that we have.

Also, does anyone know of any good Firefly fanfics? I would love to read them.

[sundrop-writes]

Okay, I knooow I said that I was gonna work on The Jaws of Life next, and it is still one of my utmost top priorities - but between holiday chronic illness burnout and my period causing a really bad flare up, I have been stuck laying in bed for like two weeks straight (and because I have a doctor's appointment coming up, I am still trying to 'take it easy') - but I am really, really starting to go stir crazy.

I need a little fictional character running around on the hamster wheel inside my brain or my brain goes to very anxious places. So when I return and get back to working on fanfiction, I want to work on something new. Because I need it for my mental health. (I literally cannot imagine sitting through 50 pages of editing right now, but I will do it later I promise.)

So these are the two ideas that I am bouncing back and forth between. These are both longer fics, but they won't be multi-chapter - they will be presented in a series of longer oneshots so that it doesn't matter if I go for months between 'updates'. (Basically, to me, a multichapter fic is a TV show with episodes and a oneshot is a film, and these fics are planned film series where each film is important and matters and can be watched on it's own.)

Working on The Jaws of Life has taught me that I can work on a oneshot with a sequel and a longer arc in mind, and still have it be a satisfying oneshot. I fucking suck at updating multichap fics, but I am very good at writing oneshots, even if they end up being 40k or 50k each, I am way better at completing them.

So please help me choose between these two ideas because I am really excited about them and I want to start ironing out and writing down the details so I can start writing out the first part when I get back to work.

Untitled aka The Longer Daryl Fic - Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader. Strangers to Lovers (to Marriage). Emotional Angst, Hurt and Comfort, Relationship Journey, Eventual Smut. Set during S1, S2, S4, S5, and S7. You and Daryl likely wouldn’t have met if not for the world crawling with dead-alive corpses, and even when you did meet - it wasn’t perfect. But somehow, the two of you became entwined, and now - you will always find your way back to him. Will be an arc in 3 Parts, will be posted in 3 long oneshots. 

Untitled aka ‘The One That Came To Me In A Dream’ - Surgical Intern Alex Karev x Surgical Intern Fem!Reader. Strangers to Friends With Benefits to Lovers. Smut, Emotional Angst. Set during Season 3. Partway through the MAGIC intern year, you are ‘transferred’ to Seattle Grace from another hospital in another state, and nobody seems to know anything about your background. Because Bailey is your resident, her other interns are incredibly curious about where you’re from and why you’re transferring so suddenly - Alex is the only one who doesn’t seem to care, especially when the two of you start having mindless crazy animal sex with absolutely no strings attached. However, he starts to care very much when a bomb is discovered in the hospital, and somehow - you know how to defuse it. (10,000 words est, or more. Will be a multi-part arc.)