#I am living prove of that
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i cant get over the ball being so CLEARLY all for crowley i can't get over aziraphale trying to woo him with a WHOLE FUCKING BALL because that's what he knows that's what romance IS for him because he's been wanting to dance with crowley ever since dancing was invented and he's so stuck in time with the way he dresses and talks and he still thinks a dance is the high of romance AND HE MADE A WHOLE ENTIRE FUCKING BALL FOR CROWLEY JUST SO HE COULD DANCE WITH HIM like now it's so fucking obvious he gave away his BOOKS without a second thought and it was all for crowley he organised a whole JANE AUSTEN THEME BALL just so he could have an excuse to finally dance with the love of his life and i can't get over this i'm shaking my fists and pacing up and down he did not give a single fuck about anything other than dancing with crowley and HE BARELY TOUCHED OTHER PEOPLE'S HANDS WHILE HIS WHOLE FUCKING PALM WAS PRESSED TO CROWLEY'S AND i need to lie down
#im actually not okay im never getting over this#this was actually the most romantic thing to ever happen on television prove me wrong you can't#no because he spent CENTURIES reading about and witnessing and orchestring romances and he's been wanting to living in them WITH CROWLEY al#this fucking time and crowley rescuing his books was the most romantic thing that ever happened to him and in return HE GAVE AWAY THE BOOKS#HE LOVES SO FUCKING MUCH FOR CROWLEY AND OH GOD OH JESUS#how am i still not normal about this show im literally box breathing and my heart is fucking POUNDING from a SHOW i cant i just cant#i need psychiatric help#good omens#good omens s2#azicrow#crowley#aziraphale#aziracrow#ineffable spouses#good omens season 2#ineffable husbands#go s2
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When he saved me on Glorious Masquerade, I finally understand why people like him (so thoughtful huhu .. TT TT)
#u're not proving anything sebek FSFGDH seriously tho pls stop being the most insane person in NRC and live for urself a lil'#twisted wonderland#twst#malleus draconia#sebek zigvolt#twst yuu#twst mc#glorious masquerade#fanart#fsdsh honestly tho i always think that i like diasomnia the least from all the other dormitories#but here i am making fanarts of them instead#life works in a mysterious way#and sebek was the last character i ever get to think of fshdshd#then i pulled him on the masquerade gacha#and everything went so fast after that#FSHDH SERIOUSLY THO HE ASKING FOR SOMEONE TO LET HIM SIT ON THEIR LAP FSHD#i just thought he said that meaning azul should have let grim sit on yuu's lap sooner#WHY DID HE MEAN SOMEONE SHOULD GIVE HIM A LAP SEAT AS WELL FHSDH#NRC full of bois with wonky thoughts fhs#seriously tho i thought malleus saved me because i am the mc but he actually thought of me not being able to use magic that's why#he saved me he's gonna make me c r y
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jon val jon or something
#jean valjean#les miserables#les mis#meme#no bc i just read the part where FIRST of all he's 'so happy his conscience began to bother him' and immediately goes 'can't have that'#and then he 'lived in the backyard like a dog' OF HIS OWN HOUSE WHILE COSETTE IS IN THE MAIN BUILDING#and jvj my beloved i am obsessed with you king but it is SO unhealthy to intentionally deprive yourself just so someone else can tell you..#'no no don't do that you need to take care of yourself' like bro i know you want to be nurtured and have someone prove their love for you#but it's really not great that the only way you keep your room at a liveable temperature and eat good food is when cosette is making you#i say this without judgement bc that was me once too but good GOD man your identity cannot be her!!!!#and stop with the preemptive self-inflicted harm!!! stop with the self-protective and yet -destructive distancing!!#you're only doing that because you want someone to tell you to stop!!!!!#alternate chapter title: in which an old man finds himself at home among the youth (2014 tumblr)#ANYways all this to say jvj is a projectable 10000% and i hate him because i love him because i hate that version of me bc i love me#or: SHUT UP AND BE LOVED YOU SILLY OLD MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#kay has a party in the tags#kay can i just catch my breath for a second#kay is a classical literature nerd#my meme
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I love it when women hate men. I love it when women are allowed to vent to each other about how horrible and creepy men are. I love it when women form friendships with and prioritize each other over relationships with men(whether they're attracted to them or not). I love it when women put men dni in their bios and on their nude photos and on posts on their blogs. I love it when women refuse to mollycoddle and accommodate entitled male feelings with "but this doesn't mean I hate all men, I know a few men who are great, I love my father/sons/brothers/uncles/male cousins/guy friends" I love it when women complain about men WITHOUT "not all men" being a disclaimer. I love it when women avoid socializing with/refuse to be around/befriend/get close to men because they know men can't be trusted. I love it when women make "kill all men" jokes. I love it when women offer absolutely no concern or care for men's feelings and if their misandry offends men whatsoever because why should we, men are the oppressor class who have raped and killed and abused us and kept us as subjugated as second-class citizens for millennia, they regularly mistreat us and the women in their own marginalized communities still every single day and make this world so much harder and more awful for us to be in, and if we choose to hate them and not spare them any sympathy then so be it, and I don't just mean "men as a class" either, you can be a woman who doesn't want to have anything to do with any man on an individual basis and completely cuts off men from her personal life too and ykw I will love and fucking support you in that because men deserve absolutely NOTHING from us. If they're so tough and strong then they can handle it just like they can handle being lonely. If you are a woman who hates men, ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE A LESBIAN AND/OR A TRANS WOMAN, then just know that I love you. I love you, I support you, and you are safe here.
#was going to make a post about how much i hate that women aren't allowed to hate their oppressors but i decided to spin it into something#positive instead#this is supposed to be the feminist site that makes reddit mgtow piss their baby diapers so let's go back to despising men and not coddling#their feelings and let's dye our hair blue while we're at it#i am so tired of this new wave of guilt-tripping and gaslighting women who hate men and don't trust or want to be around them#i hate how we're made into villainesses or the problematic ones for not valuing them in our lives or for wanting to guard ourselves or be#safe from our oppressors#and i'm tired of people who don't know the first thing about feminism being like 'BUT THAT'S TERF RHETORIC WHAT ABOUT X MINORITY MEN'#guess what women can also be x minority that you're trying to protect the men of and we get to hate men too#trans women are included when i say women btw and trans men are included when i say men#if anyone has the right to hate men more than anybody else it's trans women esp trans lesbians because they put up with so much shit#from men that even cis women do not and they especially know how vile men are behind closed doors#so#terfs fuck off#radfems fuck off#and if anybody tries to make this post more appeasing to men or 'not all men's this post you are getting blocked and hit with a hammer#feminism#misogyny#sexism#patriarchy#tw men#tw rape#tw abuse#misandry#terfs dni#radfems dni#feminists need to go back to being scary and unpalatable for men none of this 'but some of them are good!' bullshit#men are entitled to nothing from us#and if you try to prove me wrong then you are just proving my point if you have nothing good to say then simply keep scrolling#ok? ok.
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I actually thought of this prompt like forever ago and i rly wanted to write a whole story for it but i couldn't think of a plot that would stick to it and make sense without adding too many outside elements and in my opinion over saturating the story. BUT i do have a bunch of scenes of danny and damian in my head about this also also some danny and other batfam members.
So anyways your order has been delivered...
original prompt: Gotham Academy's Mentorship Program
scene two: tim's arch nemesis
table of contents
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scene 01: damian's not-so-very-bad day
“Father, you wanted to speak with me.” Damian said, trugging into his Father’s study late into the afternoon per Pennyworth’s behest.
Father looked up from his work at Damian’s arrival, Drake gave him a look of annoyance that Damian returned with a sneer. “Damian.” Father greeted as he reached Father’s work station. “I spoke with your principal earlier today.” Damian huffed and crossed his arms in defiance at whatever accusation he was about to be handed, “Put your frown away, you're not in trouble.” Father chuckled lightly.
Damian frowned. He was not a child, he did not need to be treated like one.
“There’s a mentorship program at your school.” Father started, Damian raised an intrigued brow at him.
Perhaps Father had succeeded in seeing his potential, “Well I suppose I wouldn’t mind mentoring one of the many underlings at the so-called academy.” Damian sighed, letting his arms fall to his side, as he looked up at his Father.
Father blinked at him, processing what he had said, then glanced at Drake who looked like a fraying rope length away from bursting into laughter. “The mentorship program… it’s for you.” Father tried hesitantly.
“Yes.” Damian nodded in understanding.
There was an uncomfortable silence from Father.
“He means that you're the one getting mentored.” Drake laughed at him, shoulders shaking.
Damian turned to Father. But the denial never came. “What!” Damian couldn’t help scream in outrage. “You want me to get mentored by some hillbilly civilian who can't tell a katana from a wakizashi?” He slammed his hands on Father’s table.
Father looked at him with disapproval, but said nothing, not caring enough to discipline Damian.
“Hillbilly civilian.” Drake croaked from the corner of the room, draping himself dramatically over one of the side sofas.
“You’re to meet him first thing tomorrow when you get to school. Here’s his student profile, if you're interested.” Father handed him a singular paper.
“Father I do not need-”
“It’s already been arranged Damian, atleast give it a try.” Father said with a sigh, picking up his files again in a silent dismissal of Damian.
The paper crumpled slightly as Damian stormed to his room.
Daniel James Fenton.
“Let’s see how long you last.” Damian eyed the picture of the smiling teen.
---
“Have a good day at school Masters Tim, Thomas, and Damian.” Pennyworth bid, as they all got out of the car.
“Later, Alfred.” Thomas waved at the butler as he drove off.
They all walked in the same direction to enter their classrooms, when Drake stopped him in his path. “Ohoho, and where do you think you’re going Damian?” he asked cheekily.
“Tsk.” He was hoping to be able to make it to his class before the others noticed, then continue to evade the principal and other faculty if need be required. To be foiled so early into his plan, furthermore by Drake, was humiliating.
“Aren’t you supposed to be in the principal’s office?” Drake continued to smother his victory over Damian.
“I was just on my way.” He huffed, turning around annoyed. Drake and Thomas snickered as he retreated.
Damian knocked on the familiar oak doors. “Come in.” Mr. Carson called from the other side. Damian entered, and plopped down on the same chair he sat in every time he had been sent here. “Ah Damian. Goodmorning.” He waited for a reply, but when he realized he wouldn’t be getting one he continued on, “Mr. Fenton should be here any minute, but I’m glad you were able to come here on your own accord.” Mr. Carson talked as he hung up his jacket and took a seat at his chair.
Damian could only watch the seconds tick by as he sat in that office. He wondered absentmindedly if Fenton didn’t show up would he be free. The knock at the door decimated all hopes Damian had for that.
“Ah, that must be Mr. Fenton.” Mr. Carson mused out loud, “Come in.”
Fenton entered the room hesitantly, greeting Mr. Carson with a small smile. Fenton was a scholarship student and held reasonable grades so his intellect was not to be underestimated, though often simply being able to score well on tests did not translate to having adequate life skills. Fenton was taller than Drake, but still average, dark hair, tanned skin, gray-blue eyes. When Damian’s supposed mentor looked at Damian for the first time since he had entered the room, Damian couldn’t help but feel like he was caught in a stare off with a beast.
The way Fenton examined his surroundings reminded Damian of the League of Assassins. Careful, analytical and tactical. All things Damian had excelled in. But there was something different about Fenton than what Damian had often seen in the League. His eyes were softer than those that had trained Damian. Damian couldn’t understand why his eyes looked like that.
Fenton smiled at him in a way that was likely meant to be kind, “Hi, you must be Damian. I’m Danny.” He stuck out his hand for Damian to shake.
Damian did not take the hand, instead he turned to principal Carson, “When can I leave?” He asked board, subtly eying Fenton’s reaction in his peripheral vision.
“We have to iron out the finer details and the both of you will be free to go until we see each other for our weekly check in every Friday.” Principal Carson started, “Mr. Fenton why don’t you take a seat.
Undeterred by Damian’s lack of interest, Fenton took a seat. Mr. Carson explained to Fenton his responsibilities as a mentor and what would be expected of him, Fenton in turn nodded along attentively. After his long explanation of the whole program the both of them were free from his office, and excused from classes until lunch to “get to know each other better”.
Damian translated that to having until lunch to show Fenton that he was out of his depth and have him running with his tail between his legs.
“So…” Fenton drawled trying to buy time to think of something adequate to say no doubt, “How about we go to the library to hang out?” Fenton offered.
Damian simply huffed in agreement as they made their way to a pair of sofas tucked between the many rows of books.
“So, Damian, uh, what do you like to do after school?” Fenton asked unoriginally.
Damian turned so he could meet Fenton eye-to-eye. “Train.” He said honestly. If he plans on scaring him off then leaning into the superficial things he learned in the League would do him well.
“Oh, you do sports?” Fenton asked inquisitively. Damian was momentarily thrown off by his show of genuine interest in his personal life, but Damian quickly collected himself. Fenton was merely putting on an act to get him to open up, Damian would be a fool to fall for it.
“No.” He scoffed at the thought of sports, “I train for battle,” He made sure to put as much confidence as he could in his voice. Oftentimes in the past when he had told his peers of his activities they had brushed him off and laughed at him, Damian wondered if Fenton would have a similar reaction.
“Hardcore.” Fenton nodded in awe.
Damian blinked, “You believe me?” He found himself whispering.
“Well, yeah.” Fenton responded as if it were the most obvious thing, in fact, he seemed confused as Damian’s bafflement.
Damian quickly collected himself, “Well of course you should believe me it’s the truth, I’m a highly skilled blade user.” He nodded to himself.
“Blade user, huh? Do you prefer katanas or wakizashi? Or a classic long sword maybe.” Fenton asked eying Damian as if it would help him find the correct answer.
“Katanas obviously.” Damian scoffed, “They’re incredibly balanced, strong, and give you incredible control over your attacks. Wakizashi are also a good option if you prefer close combat and if you’re fighting in an area with a lot of obstacles.” Fenton hummed and nodded at his explanation, and Damian found himself continuing, “Long swords are originally from the Bavaria and Switzerland regions during the medieval times-”
#danny and damian#damian al ghul#damian wayne#danny fenton#dpxdc#Gotham Academy's Mentorship Program#Mentor Danny#danny: wow this kid seems kinda nervous let me send him some chill vibes#damian: why do i keep talking???#and yes danny asking about the swords was a callback to what damian said to prove that danny is going to live up what damian needs him to b#but tbh we all knew that#is principal carson clockwork??? who knows#damian: violence is an option#danny after years of being surrounded by ghosts that will tackle him to the floor and break bones as a way to say wassup bestie:#aww what a cute baby ghost talking about baby ghost things#tim loves trolling damian#actually i love trolling damian and am living vicariously thru him#damian is not a reliable narrator#damian is also rly dramatic#he is best boy <3#kinda forgot duke isn't suppose to be here yet but#my story my timeline#danny mentorship au
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Touya responding with “Oh really? My condolences. Giving me all your attention after everything’s over is easy, you coward.” when Enji said that “The Hero Endeavor has burned to death” it’s just so satisfying. Like— GO. OFF. YOU ABSOLUTE KING.
He will never not be a menace for this guy and I love Touya so fucking much for that 🤧💜
#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#bnha#mha#dabi#touya todoroki#bnha dabi#mha dabi#bnha 426#mha 426#bnha spoilers#mha spoilers#fuck endeavor#whenever i think i can’t love him any more than i already do… this man just proves me the contrary#him and natsuo ending endeavor like that was just SO. DAMN. RIGHT.#and btw this to me just proves that touya will live. he is just too good not to i’m sorry (not really) to the ones that thought he won’t 🥰#PLEASE I CAN’T STOP SMILE GIGGLING AND KICK MY FEET BECAUSE OF THE WAY HE ONCE AGAIN DESTROYED ENJI ONLY WITH WORDS#THIS MAN IS SO POWERFUL I AM SOBBING SO BAD
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I am. So worried about Jinx ngl.
rewatching Act 2 and just :/ the death flags
#pls prove me wrong act 3 PLS#Jinx (arcane)#arcane#arcane spoilers#d musings#the whole thing with Isha#she's a macrocosm of Powder#a physical manifestation of both Jinx's old identity and her passions/motivations/interests and also self love#in addition to her love as a big sister I mean#like on a thematic level#one can say Jinx has lost her identity/will to live#I am VERY worried
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Me approaching a random lesbian couple: so uh, which one of you is the dark religious fanatic and which is the brawny two-handed weapon fighter?
#you know#coz Baldurs Gate 3 has got me thinking about the Locked Tomb#coz like I don't know how many of you listened to the audiobook for Gideon the Ninth#but the voice acting for Karlach and Gideon is uncannily similar#and Harrowhark and Shadowheart#I mean just say those names out loud and then describe their lives and religions#AM I WRONG?#btw I haven't even finished act 1 yet so yeah if I AM wrong maybe don't use spoilers to prove it please thanks#I appreciate your patronage of my dumbassery#the locked tomb#tlt#gideon the ninth#bg3#baldurs gate 3#griddlehark#shadowlach#that last ship name is a guess I don't know their lives
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youtube
FUCK THEM UPPPPPPP TILL OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDD
The visuals of Till's splash art (in my humble opinion, the best one so far) is STUNNING. AND very interesting.
For Till specifically to cover All-In is an interesting message to give off, All-In is a song about freedom. A type of freedom that allows you to live confidently and freely, creating whatever type of world you want, the stage is yours, so make what you want of it. living confidently in YOUR OWN SKIN. And living freely "cause you only got one life to live"
Freedom is something Till fights for relentlessly, and confidence is a bravado, as by far the most uncontrolled and tested person in the cast, he still fights for his boundaries and self-expression even when he's punished, molded into something he's not, or beaten into obedience, tested far past the limit; he never loses his bite. A wild dog can never be tamed.
This is the cover that follows what becomes of Till after round 6, and still, in Till's all-in, he sounds so raw, pained, energized, and passionate desperation is evident. It's a contrast from HyunA's celebratory cheers and upbeat mood because Till isn't celebrating the idea of freedom; he's angrily proving to everyone, especially the aliens, that he isn't backing down yet and he'll still keep fighting and that he can fight for his own freedom.
Till's cover of All-in is truly the most powerful depiction of Till's fighting spirit, after everything he's gone through, the pain, the grief. It's all in his voice and the way he sings he's pained the entire time he sings and he's aggressive because the fire of his spirit is lit once again. He's going "all-in" so to speak and expressing himself.
The tape around his neck--
It's a contrast to HyunA who doesn't mind showing her brand, even proudly showing it off as a form of reclaiming her individualism.
Till is different. Because being reminded that he is and was once a pet is not something he would want to remember about himself, he will always bitterly try to distance himself from that fact in any way he can, HyunA feels free from the system when she can own it, but when Till sees his branding, he'll still always feel that collar. It's a testament to his self-deprecation, as long as the evidence of his past is present, and he still feels all the pain the aliens inflicted on him, It'd be presumptuous to think he'd ever feel like he can relate and fit in with the other "fools" who are so free.
It'd be presumptuous to think he'd ever feel free. That's what the aliens wanted, right?
Another interesting part of this is that the name 'All-in" is actually a real-life poker reference, to go "all-in" in poker is to voluntarily bet all of your remaining chips, there is nothing else you can do but hope for the best after that point (and hope you win).
When HyunA sings All-in, she deceives you into thinking she has the upper hand or good hand, and that she will win. When Till sings it, he's giving it all away recklessly, he's showing all he has. Basically, him saying fuck it. he doesn't know if he'll win or not but says, "Let's go all-in and risk it all anyways" Even if internally he knows that this is stupid and risky, this is his foolish rebellion.
At this point he has nothing to lose and nothing to gain, it's his final stand as he lets his heart out not for the crowd, but for the family he lost, himself, a form of self-expression. He will be so nervous, so aggrieved but it's the freest he will ever feel on that stage.
The color symbolism also drives me CRAZY.
For his other two splash art, he's been represented with a color close enough to teal. In both songs, he's open when he sings and fully serene. Teal is a generally calming color, and it's not too evocative. It's more emotional (and has it's own reservations)
And then, we have green, which is a general symbol of growth, new beginnings, and freshness. After all, Till has been through all-in is a sign of his growth. And a new era of his life, or in other words a sudden tonal shift from his depressive state in round 6.
And for my favorite (it's not.) part! the head shot, (interesting how his has nearly the biggest impact out of them all.)
A bit of a theory.
It's a bit similar to one particular art of him, he has a little shape that's almost akin to impact from a gunshot near the same area.
So, I think this is tell-tale symbolism for a future injury, but the gun portrayed is a bubble gun. I believe it is symbolism for the wound being non-fatal, so even if Till loses and gets shot, he'll survive, fundamentally changed. and will probably join the rebellion, too.
/side note
The heartbeats in Till's version of all-in are faster and louder than HyunA's version, similar to CURE.
#trust me im qmeng#till all-in cover got me tweaking out big time do you UNDERSTAND how long i waited for this#ever since the teaser#GUHHH#IT'S BEEN IN MY MIND SINCE#i am never sleeping again fuck this#am i crazy about till alien stage no of course not#haahahah#if this sounds like a big rant i just want till to live bear with me WAIT NO COME BACK#im going so crazy about this its not even funny its so serious#this shit is so good though#the growls#and everything#urgh#till alien stage#alien stage#alien stage till#alnst#alnst till#i just really like how this song isnt all that much lika hyunA's in terms of tone#it has the same beat but when you look deeper into it. this is more dark than youd expect#to me it's not a cheerful take on All-IN it's a darker one through the perspective of someone on their final rope aggressively proving he's#not broken#this is also him grieving#everything about this scares me but i have a lot of faith in him.#(praise akugetsu I couldn't thank you enough)#alien stage round 6#alien stage round 7#alien stage analysis
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me watching modern trek
#the way that everything continually ties back to enterprise#is so hilarious because everyone hates it so much#i am living#trip tucker is alive and i can prove it#star trek#star trek tos#star trek enterprise#star trek voyager#star trek next generation#star trek deep space 9#star trek discovery#star trek strange new worlds#star trek lower decks#star trek prodigy#star trek picard
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Frankly I think that if we get a DA after TV, and Illario ends up being the crow companion, that would be be a really good way for BioWare to worm their way out of the Crow sanitation hole they wrote themselves into. Lucanis talks good about the Crows? Yeah of course he was Grandma’s favorite, Gods little prince. He says his training was torture, and he has panic attacks, but frankly I can definitely see a ‘his training was actually softer, to the point where his empathy and care for others made it out unscathed’. Which is not the case for an assassin who probably went through the actual Crow training, like it seems Illario “Lesser” Dellamorte did. Or potentially even more rigorous Crow training, since Illario always seemed set up for failure.
Lucanis is more willing to risk failure for others as we see in the Wigmaker job, and Illario is the one concerned out this. Lucanis isn’t, probably because subconsciously, he knows the consequences for him failing would be minimal or null.
Just take it as a “if Lucanis had to kneel on gravel for hours, I had to kneel for days” type take on Illario. Just say Lucanis kind of got the softer stick, everyone we see did, honestly. I think it would be a notable if not acceptable re-retcon.
He definitely wouldn’t hold back telling the truth and shit talking grandma as even though he is technically ’crow nobility’, unlike the others (even Rook bc Viago is not hurting their ass let’s be real), he was never treated that way. Illario is so oddly at the bottom and top of the social ladder that if he’s written in as a returning Cullen-type character, they could prob go ‘yeah Lucanis was given the privilege of rose-tinted glasses kind of, and was able to make it out with his humanity intact because of his Grandma’s weakness toward him, Illario wasn’t given that minuscule affection so he didn’t’ and then go from there.
#yapping#dragon age the veilguard#dragon age#illario dellamorte#lucanis dellamorte#I think it would be interesting to see the comparison between them too#though I do fesr with the right writing and a spot lot on his character he could turn into the next Astarion#we alreayd see the attempts with Lucanis and Emmrich#but alas I am simply tapping into the wind#but I think Illario being forced to go 2 steps further only to end up 2 steps behind#would be a much better take for his envy/bitterness than what we got in game#like Lucanis’ arc is proving to him that he can live AGAIN outside of his fault and being a crow and his trauma#Illario’s’ arc could be that he can live in general and also have like 2% genuine interactions as he seems to have a solid mask in place#Wigmaker job Illario just dropping the cherry personality and being nothing but cold impassiveness#chewy
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if i'm being entirely honest i find the term "spiritual psychosis" annoying at best. it makes me feel as though i, as someone with schizoaffective disorder, need to work extra hard to "prove" my spiritual beliefs are valid.
here's the thing. my spirituality has always been and will always be flavored and colored by being schizoaffective. even when i was an atheist i could not untangle the two. there's never going to be a way for me to know where the line is drawn between my spiritualism and my psychosis. for example i will probably never shake the idea that i died and was resurrected, and that event holds SIGNIFICANT spiritual meaning for me, even on antipsychotics, even when i can recognize that yes, it's probably the remains of a delusion.
so please tell me, why is it anyone else's business if i incorporate that into my religious practices? it harms no one and gives me one more reason to rejoice. if it started causing actual problems, putting me in danger, causing me distress, bringing along disorganized thinking or anything of the sort, that's when it would be time for me to get help. but really and truly i would not want random people im not close with to tell me to get that help, especially if their only clues into my mental state come from my spiritual practices. i am not a dog to be taken to the vet. sometimes people are psychotic and we exist in your communities and we have religious beliefs and you have GOT to suck it up and allow space for us, however our conditions affect us and our practices.
it's also just. buries my face in my hands. you can just say psychosis, you don't need a special term for it. again it just makes me feel like i'm being singled out and not being taken seriously because there's a long LONG history of psychotic/schizospec people having our mental illnesses used as reason to disregard us. please just mind your business.
#cadaver speaks#mostly prompted by me looking into godspousing after a very interesting experience#and seeing someone basically say most godspouses are experiencing spiritual psychosis#which read more to me as a complaint about how other people practice than actual concern for people's mental health#do i know whether i was visited by dionysus or just have silly silly brain chemicals? NOPE#and it's entirely fucking futile to try to figure it out because you can't prove any gods exist and i'm an unreliable narrator!#so i have to ask myself: what will make me happy?#should i deny myself the joy of worship just because i drew the short straw and got saddled with schizoaffective?#or should i say fuck it and do what will make me happy?#i want to live! i beg to live!! i am wrenching the fullness of my feeble human life from nonpsychotics' hands!!!#obligatory disclaimer that if you're psychotic/schizospec and you find the term spiritual psychosis useful that's fine#anyway. society will not be free until the lunatics are free from our chains and shackles. or something#mad pride#schizophrenia#schizoaffective#actually schizophrenic#actually schizoaffective#actually schizospec#spirituality#paganism#witchcraft#mental health#if anyone willfully misinterprets what i'm saying you owe me one thousand usd#if it doesn't make sense reread the post or move on. good Bye
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I gave myself a writing challenge and I am fascinated by it
So basically I put the robins in a randomizer to give them a new order/role (because I just...kinda wanted to see what would happen + I like role-reversal AUs) and got results that are giving me a fucking brain blast.
Stephanie, the first sidekick who defines the role
Tim, the sidekick who dies and comes back wrong
Dick, the sidekick who saves Batman from himself
Damian, the sidekick who was never supposed to be a sidekick but would go on to prove everyone wrong
Jason, the youngest sidekick who is still the Kid Wonder
...So this is fucking wild. I've got some ideas and several of these fit perfectly (Dick's role is pretty similar to his one in canon), but some of these are fucking INCREDIBLE to explore (Steph being the first Robin is something I never even considered but tbh I kinda love it).
I probably won't write a fic or anything because tbh I don't like publishing my writing that much, but I might expand this into a full AU and post about it. I might randomize other stuff too (ie, stuff that I cannot change vs stuff that I cannot keep the same) but this fucking rules as a starting point.
#uhhh what am I calling this??#randomizedrobinsau#stephanie brown#oh my god I am so excited to figure out how tf to write this.#because she's my favorite of these characters and having HER be the first sidekick + the one who has a mentor/older sister relationship#with the others?? kickass. though I'll probably keep her and Tim's relationship as 'dating-then-exes' because I think it's funny#and then SHE can be the Robin who Tim got fixated on + figured out her identity?? holy fuck and then the angst of Tim later dying#Tim Drake#tbh I kinda wish he'd gotten a different position because 'sidekick who dies' Tim has kinda been done a lot with the standard#reverse robin aus. But it'll still be fun to write. Definitely going the Joker Junior route with this because Batman Beyond kicks ass#Dick Grayson#He'll honestly probably be the easiest. Like...his role has not changed much outside of being younger/not the one who defines this#But I still think it'll be good to see how well I know Dick beyond his eldest brother thing (which is my best way of relating to him)#Damian al ghul#damian wayne#oh this is gonna kick ass#Bruce does not want his son to be a sidekick but Damian just kinda forces his way into that role#and everybody doubts him because of his history with the league but he later proves himself more than capable#to the point that he can set out mostly on his own and still thrive#Jason Todd#Jason being the baby of the family is also something I have never thought about but holy shit it could kick ass#I really hope that I don't roll 'Jason must die' or 'Robin 5 must die' on the randomizer. I just kinda want Jason to live this time#But unfortunately I double-screwed him because he's on the 'must happen' wheel twice now. I did not think these prompts through#TBH I am so happy that none of them rolled their OG roles. because that would have been so fucking boring
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尘缘 | Divine Destiny E6 ° No matter how hard the path is, I will never leave.
#尘缘#Divine Destiny#cdrama#Wang Zhuocheng#Xuan Lu#character: yin feng/luo feng#character: gu qing#is it weird to see them in a romantic relationship?#yeaahhhh#am i supposed to feel for the actual mains?#the ml: who killed and then impersonated a fallen god?#the fl: who (in her misplaced jealousy) turned HERSELF into a demon fox?#the ACTUAL fallen gods: who have spent 99 lives making up for their wrong- hoping to make it back to godhood#on their last before they can re-ascend#only to have it cocked up by mortals#so now she doesn't recognize him and has misplaced her loyalty#and he can't PROVE his identity#argghhhhh#(but is it funny that she's a... rock?)#meowmao gifs
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people talking about dorian's corruption arc just starting now that cyrus is dead kinda. idk it rubs me the wrong way. and i know not everyone watched exu prime. so i don't expect everyone to know that dorian STARTED chaotic good and got his alignment changed to chaotic neutral by the fucking spider queen because he KNEW what the villains in exu prime would do and didn't care if it meant he could save his friends.
if there's gonna be a true corruption arc for dorian, not just vengeance arc (which is what i think), that corruption started waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay back when.
and his anger. ooooooooh boy dorian's anger. is so precious to me. but he has always ALWAYS been angry. robbie plays it so well and there have been several other Excellent posts on here about dorian and how his anger is always just... bubbling under the surface. how he hides it behind joviality and charisma.
he has the anger of a discarded second son. man his middle fucking name!!!! signifies exactly how he's viewed at "home." and i'm sure his parents and the people of the silken squall would argue that "secondsun" is an honor and a privilege. and i am equally sure that dorian hates it with everything in him. and hates it EVEN MORE now that cyrus is dead.
the 7th level geas was... so fucking sexy. just absolutely chefs kiss. but it's not! new! the interactions with cyrus at the ball! he blackslides into that icy anger more than once in the first episodes of c3 because it's always there!
and anger is very easily corrupted into something sickly and harmful. i get it. but this isn't the start of dorian going down a deeply juicy and interesting path. it's a 300 level kick into the tragedy of it all. but it's always been there. and the end result of this is NOT going to be him going full darkside/joining ludinus and/or the vanguard. because again. all this anger is boiling over into vengeance because people he LOVED were hurt/corrupted/killed themselves. you think he's gonna join up with the group that killed laudna and orym and fearne and chetney AND fcg while he was gone??????? and yes fearne, orym, chetney, and (after a lot more work) laudna all came back. but they were still DEAD because of the actions of people!!!! not the gods!!!!!
he's going rageful, wrathful, vengeance paladin. he's gonna salt and burn the earth to protect his people and ruin the corpses of people that oppose him. and hopefully. HOPEFULLY. at the end. he'll have enough people left around him to pull him back from the edge. remind him why he's fighting. and keep him safe.
#joanne talks#hello please enjoy a mildly coherent AT BEST post about one of my favorite pcs in actual play#dorian storm#can't wait for thursday to come around and prove me wrong about the vengeance paladin thing but in the meantime i am living in this spec#critrole#c3: bells hells#critical role spoilers
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sometimes I think the wisest thing to do. Is give up. For real this time.
#i cannae wait for this boy and the idea of doing so makes me so fed up#i am living! and i am alive and breathing and i was not made for that long sorrow#nor should i sacrifice preciois time and energy for it!#precious lol#ALSO I BALK AT THE THOUGHT OF FALLING PREY TO DESPAIR AGAIN so i simply shan't :)#formal declaration of Giving Up. very cheerfully. ive had enough#and i KNOW i put in my best and wouldve put in my very best if he'd shot his shot however he did not#for whatever reason. dont ask me i dont know#and i dont need to prove to anyone that im worth time and effort. so THERE#!!!! :)
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