#I am just some guy with NPD | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

epsiphi · 1 month ago

Text

so i saw THIS image online courtesy of twitter user @/offpridbird and it inspired me to look into the criteria for each of these disorders, and how they might fit him, so…

welcome to

My Analysis On Whether or Not Goro Akechi Has a Cluster B Personality Disorder (According to the DSM-V)

(this is a long post that took up TWELVE pages in my notebook so the nitty gritty is under the cut. tl;dr, there’s evidence in favor of all these)

now you might ask: what are your qualifications? to that i say: i’m a psychology student* who also happens to be a big fan of goro akechi. which is to say that i am not an expert; i just really like this fictional guy. my analysis is also based on my personal understanding of his character. so, you know, don’t flay me alive if i get a part of his character wrong. or do.

*high school

in case you don’t know what a cluster b personality disorder is: it’s a subset of personality disorders characterized by “dramatic, emotional, or erratic” behavior. it includes:

antisocial personality disorder (ASPD)

borderline personality disorder (BPD)

narcissistic personality disorder (NPD)

histrionic personality disorder (HPD).

this post covers ASPD, BPD, and NPD, because those are the disorders i’ve seen most ascribed to akechi. i might cover HPD some other time.

(also yes i seriously perused a copy of the dsm-v for this)

Borderline Personality Disorder

1. Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment: we’re looking at mr. “I was extremely particular about my life…my grades…my public image…so someone would want me around!” over here. it’s made pretty clear that akechi’s perfect persona wasn’t something he just started doing when he became famous; it started after his mother died, once he was being “passed around from foster home to foster home”. he tried to be perfect so they would want him. it’s clear that none of them did.

2. A pattern of unstable and intense relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation: the only real relationships akechi has are with joker (no canon name discourse here) and shido. it goes without saying that neither of these relationships are very normal; on akechi’s part, both are characterized by his obsessions and love-hate feelings. akechi does also kind of have an idealizing issue with joker (putting him on a pedestal—which is admittedly something most characters do, but i feel like akechi is not any more normal about joker than anyone else)

3. Identity disturbance (markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self): i feel like this guy cycles between “i was cut from the cloth of god” and “i am the scum of the earth”. in thirdsem, he does not seem to have much of a self beneath his detective prince persona (by which i mean he’s very…blank? just look at his default portrait. very blunt and to the point)

4. Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g. spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating): none of these apply in canon. he does seem to have issues with food (forgetting to eat, apparently eating little, not caring about the taste of what he eats vs. the appearance of it, he runs a food blog but it appears to be mostly for show). choosing to become a hitman for a comically evil politician who is also your father at age 15 would qualify for self-damaging, but might also fall under…

5. Recurrent suicidal behavior/gestures/threats, or self-mutilating behaviors: his revenge plan is so bad it’s borderline suicidal—not in the sense that he actively planned to kill himself afterwards or anything, but in the sense of he spent so long fantasizing about getting revenge that he literally never stopped to think about the day after. not envisioning a meaningful future is also suicidal.

6. Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood: this confused the hell out of me at first. it essentially means rapid, intense mood shifts. i’m…not sure, actually. (i guess you could count the insane difference between his self in battle vs himself out of battle in thirdsem as this, but i’m not the guy who can answer that).

7. Chronic feelings of emptiness: remember that thieves den conversation where yusuke mentions how difficult keeping up an act for a long stretch of time is (in reference to the pts pretending not to know the truth about akechi in sae’s palace) and akechi responds with “Is that so? Well, you stop feeling things once you get used to it”? because i do. (note the use of a word as general as things) (also veering into hc: i’ve seen people say akechi’s sin, had his palace not been cut, likely would’ve been acedia, which is…indifference. emptiness.)

8. Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger: have you seen the engine room. i think it’s always there, it’s just that he’s good at controlling it 98% of the time.

9. Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms: kind of on the fence about this one—leaning towards yes. i think this sort of applies to the interrogation room? he moves through a lot of it vaguely shocked + a few subsequent tv interviews. in the one soonest after 11/20–the “same strategy used in romance” interview—he has an oddly flat affect, which is funny given the context of how he’s being lauded as hero. like…he can’t even pretend to be happier. in the interview that occurs during the infiltration of shido’s palace (“none of these people know i was an undesirable child”) he mentions how the news of joker’s suicide was dizzying—obviously he’s lying about WHY it was dizzying, but he still appears to mean it.

Total criteria fulfilled: 7/9. (Criterion 1, 2, 3, either 4 or 5 could be considered fulfilled but not both at once, 7, 8, 9)

for clarification: any suicidal behavior under criterion 5 cannot be counted in criterion 4. so if you consider “becoming a hitman for his scraped-off-the-boot-of-the-devil father at 15” as self-damaging but not suicidal, then criterion 4 is fulfilled. if you consider it suicidal behavior, then criterion 5 is fulfilled.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder

1. Has a grandiose sense of self-importance: not sure how to describe this one other than “you know it bitch”

2. Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love: in my notebook i literally just wrote “yeah” for this. because i don’t have any articulated reason for this belief, i won’t count it as fulfilled criteria. but know i believe it

3. Believes that they are “special” and unique and can only be understood by, or associate with, other special or high status people: by his own admission (confidant rank 2), akechi does not have friends—or as he says, “people i’d actively choose to see in my free time”. it’s not for lack of people who’d want to be his friend; this is in june, people are raving about him. so he probably has a million connections and people who’d love to hang out with him, but he doesn’t want to hang out with a bunch of nobodies. his trait in the artbook is that he gets distracted in conversation, which is a very light way of saying that he doesn’t pay attention to people because they’re boring and not worth the time. joker falls under “other special people”. also, on “believes they’re special”: there’s something to be said about how akechi awakens to his persona 2 years before canon, and how he was totally on his own. like, as far as he knew, he was the only person with these powers—the only person without a shadow, and as such, the only person without distorted desires. so naturally he would consider himself special. (ignoring that he literally kind of is)

4. Requires excessive admiration: guy who has spent whole life internalizing that he is inherently unlovable and worthless becomes a celebrity and puts up a perfect front because he needs people to love him; more at 9. (dsm-v also states: “Their self-esteem is invariably very fragile. They may be preoccupied with how well they are doing and how favorably they are regarded by others”. obviously. hello, 8/28)

5. Has a sense of entitlement (i.e. unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment): great time to bring up Relative Deprivation Theory—the belief that someone will feel deprived of or entitled to something in comparison to another. in akechi’s case: deprivation of acceptance/love in comparison to joker and entitlement to the same (“How does someone like you have things I don’t?!”). it’s interesting that he uses his fame as a reason why he deserves what joker has, when it’s why he doesn’t (fame is not love).

6. Is interpersonally exploitative (i.e. takes advantage of others to achieve their own ends): the core of his charm is manipulation and inherent dishonesty, so i kind of feel this is a given.

7. Lacks empathy (is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others): there’s Word of God that akechi is just like, “whatever” to anyone who isn’t joker, as in he doesn’t particularly care about anyone else on a deeper level (not a ship thing; just an observation). also does not seem to care about most of the people he kills or who get hurt as a result of his actions (i.e. psychotic breakdowns).

8. Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of them: i mean…do i really have to say anything about this.

9. Shows arrogant or haughty behaviors: do i really have to say anything about this (2). it’s kind of everywhere in the third semester. if you want more evidence: look at his thieves den conversations (crazy)

Total criteria fulfilled: 8/9. (All criterion but 2)

i think goro akechi might be the most covert narcissist in fiction.

Antisocial Personality Disorder:

this one’s a little different than the others.

A. A pervasive pattern of disregard for and violation of the rights of others, occurring since age 15 years, as indicated by three (3) or more of the following:

1a. Failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviors, as indicated by repeatedly performing acts that are grounds for arrest: i’m no lawyer but i think murder is grounds for arrest.

2a. Deceitfulness, as indicated by repeated lying, use of aliases, or conning others for personal profit or pleasure: this guy lies as easily as he breathes. inevitably he’s lying all the time, considering no one is bringing up the fact that he’s a magic assassin until november 20th.

3a. Impulsivity or failure to plan ahead: well, no, akechi is the type to overplan ahead. i do think he’s kind of impulsive, by virtue of the fact that he’s more emotional than logical.

4a. Irritability or aggressiveness: he hides both of these pretty well for the majority of the game but once third semester starts? irritability is off the charts. aggressiveness is usually confined to battle (despite many many many fan interpretations that would say otherwise)

5a. Reckless disregard for safety of self or others: murder and psychotic breakdowns that wreak havoc on public safety sure does suggest a disregard for others’ safety. choosing to become a hitman for someone you know is evil as a teenager also implies a certain disregard for self-safety.

6a. Consistent irresponsibility, as indicated by repeated failure to sustain consistent work behavior or financial obligations: nope.

7a. Lack of remorse, as indicated by being indifferent to or rationalizing having hurt, mistreated, or stolen from another: as i mentioned under NPD criterion 7–absolutely. emphasis on rationalizing (“My targets were all doing the same damn thing in this eat or be eaten world. All I did was remove their evil from society. How is that any different from the Phantom Thieves?”)

B. The individual is at least 18 years of age: well, yeah. he’s just barely 18 when you formally meet him on june 9th.

C. There is evidence of conduct disorder with onset before age 15 years: unfortunately akechi is not real, so we don’t have this information. i highly doubt it, though (specifically i doubt there would be evidence, if we believe he was already putting up the perfect front before he was famous).

D. The occurrence of antisocial behavior is not exclusively during the course of schizophrenia or bipolar disorder: no (but uh. bipolar disorder is another topic for another day)

Criteria A fulfilled: 5/7. (Criterion 1, 2, 4, 5, 7). Criterion B and D are also fulfilled.

SO! conclusions:

the possibility of akechi having any one of these disorders is plausible

the real common enemy are the people who try and say akechi has no longstanding trauma/psychological issues. clearly, he’s got…something.

goro akechi is the cluster b final boss

#goro akechi #persona 5 #persona 5 royal #no idea what niche of people are gonna be interested in this but uh. its here #guess which one of these i personally hc akechi to have #i realize i cited some info here that is not directly from the game. my source is ‘i remembered it but i don’t have links’#anyway if you want links i’ll find them #if anyone has anything to add or correct go for it #cause i threw this together in like 6 hours. for ‘FUN’

102 notes · View notes

rainbow-blocklists · 4 months ago

Text

(pls block and avoid them,no harassment or cyber bullying,keep your dni rules and no interactions with these users,if you have questions,ask politely and no death threats or harassment to me or anyone,even the listed people below)

Blocklist for these users

Hater, Racists, Narcissist abuse truthers and albiest:

@basedhartman (fatphobe and inappropriate hater)

@Angelbabyspice (Self shipper hater and apparently, people seem to be baffled when I type in "failed mother",woopsie then, then they should've dm me about the issue,but who am I to judge since I had beef with this user for what she did to Fictodreamer, guess people outside will never see the picture, no pressure and no hard feelings for the users questioning me,GG)

@/KarmaIsMyFriend (narcissist truther)

@Coulsonlive/Momantai (main account) of Dnihallofshame (Dni hater)

@/narcissistic-abuse-blog (their name says it all)

@/rapemurderandkillallageres (they have a weird hatred on age regressers)

@/i-reblog-racists (Karen, don't bother talking to them)

@nullheaven (Albeist)

@/daughterofanarcissistwoman (narcissist abuse truther)

@/uncoveringthenarcissist (narcissist abuse truther)

@/narcissismarticles (narcissist abuse truther)

@shooooooo-oooooooooooo

@shoooooo-ooooooooooo

@karrrkarrroooott

@wellllll-well-well

(These are alt accounts of a guy who's been harassing people a lot,report to me if you spot more of the same guy's alt accounts and I'll know since he has the same speaking patterns)

@/kingofantiendos (harasses everyone and is albiest)

@Boinextdewar (online harasser)

@/duncebento (fujoshi)

@/raibura(fujoshi)

(There was a user here,but it's up to debate with an ongoing dm meetings and discussions, don't worry)

@/your-dearly-demented (Narc abuse truther)

@thevxid-intxwhich-iscream (narc abuse truther)

@/liquid-pie (narc abuse truthers / open ableists)

@/dragon-master-kai

(narc abuse truthers / open ableists)

swagging-back-to (narcissist abuse truther)

@/not-a-narc-apologist (this one is really disappointing, they have an actual personality disorder (they have a cluster c personality disorder, it being AVPD (avoidant personality disorder) but they allow their internalized ableism to hurt those within the cluster b PD community by believing the bullshit about narcissistic abuse is real)

@/nothing0fnothing (some reblogged multiple posts from them prior to deleting/their account got banned. User kept claiming you can separate narcissism from NPD, claimed that people with PDs have to be internally ableist in order for them to treat them like people (which is no, they're incredibly ableist for that mindset).)

@/silent-t0n (another report about some reblogged an infuriating post about how they say if someone tells you that narcissistic abuse isn't real then it makes you a victim-blamer (it doesn't, victim-blaming does not mean use it as a shield to defend being ableist online. This user imo needs to look that definition up a lot...)

@/maternalscars (user thinks people are victim-blaming them because they are stating that narcissistic abuse isn't real)

@/turquoiseyt (homophobic, transphobic and a hypocrite)

@/Fetusbaconegg (has hatred on Chara and Kris fans)

@/gordontheengineswifeenirmal (do I have I explain this one?)

@/rainychopshopperfection (narcissist abuse truther)

@/technicallycrookeddreamer (p*rn spamming on open communities)

@/nokraz2000 (Transphobic (corrected that since they r slur at me for mistaking them as queerphobic instead of that,but oh well at least they corrected and racist creep)

@/wisepiratedestiny (art thief and stalker,there is a call out post about this user,if your so curious,dm me to send ye the link if you don't want your blog to be seen,it's not that hard,I welcome people asking me,just not in anons anymore)

#anti proship #block and avoid #block list #blocklist #cosmic guardians #proships dni #rainbow starheart

113 notes · View notes

sillyscientists · 8 months ago

Note

gimmw your gfalls hcs NOEWWW

oh god! I have soooo many but i'll put some basic ones down for the pines family rn and probably add on to this later ^_^

Dipper

◇ First of all this boy is absolutely autistic. My little autistic ass acted so much like him as a kid, I mean, what autistic 12 year old wouldn't base their entire summer around a weird book full of monsters they found?

◇ I think he's a trans dude and aro/ace, and that his crush on Wendy was more comphet than anything. I'm not really a fan of any ship involving him but I think platonic dipcifica could be cute.

◇ Cryptozoology/The Paranormal is absolutely his main special interest, but he also has an sp/in in computers/comp sci (but he's honestly not great at computer stuff).

Mabel

◇ AuDHD Queen! I think her main special interest is absolutely arts / crafts, I mean look at all the silly things she makes throughout the series as well as her dedication to handmaking dozens of puppets/props/etc as well as writing and entire play to impress her crush of the week in Sock Opera. ◇ I think sexuality wise she's not straight but prefers to be unlabelled. I also like to think she's the type to collect xenogenders / neopronouns like pokemon cards. ( she totally uses a bunch of cat-based pronouns) ◇ Shortly after the series I think she'd get a little less Boys-Crazy and focus more exploring who she is as a person / her self expression. Absolutely is gonna have a mall goth/emo/scene phase (she's smushing all three of those together into one thing for herself).

(I also think Mabel and Dipper were born identical twins)

Grunkle Stan

◇ Also AuDHD, not quite sure what his big main special interest would be but he's absolutely hyperfixated on Ducktective. Also going off the story in Lost Legends I think he'd absolutely be getting into making comics / drawing in general (even if hes not great at it). Post series I think he'd spend a lot of his free time out at sea drawing in the boat's cabin. Mostly making comics of silly re-tellings of he and Ford's adventures out at Sea (he absolutely shows Dipper and Mabel these if he and Ford video calls them when they're on land) ◇ I'm a transfem Stanley truther. He doesn't really realize/come to terms with it until post-series. I think she'd just grow out her hair and throw it in a pony-tail + use she/he pronouns to transition. She'd still use the name Stanley and be fine with both masc/fem terms (ie fine be called a man or a woman). Also he's bisexual (but has known this since he was like a teen, even if he didn't have the words to label it.) ◇ I think his Popsicle addiction from the unaired pilot is real and canon. Old autistic men love popsicles just look at my dad and grandfather.

Ford

◇ oh boy its projection time (i am a stanford pines fictive) 😈😈😈

◇ Transmasc, somewhere under the nonbinary umbrella but very guy adjacent. Mainly uses he/him pronouns but I think he'd use "it" and "they" aswell. Gay and Arospec as well. ◇ Autism + NPD + Schizophrenia wombo combo. He's sooooo NPD coded its INSANE, I am going to write an essay about it in the future. Goes without saying that his special interests are the paranormal and various sciences, but I think he has a hardcore love for the arts as well. ◇ Going off both the autism and arospec HC- I think he's the type to convince himself he has a crush very easily, when in reality he just has a strong admiration / platonic love for those in question, and had strong platonic feelings for McGucket back in college that he confused for romantic ones (projecting 100000000%) (i think the Stan twins were fraternal twins)

#gravity falls #gravity falls headcanons #gravity falls hcs #dipper pines #mason pines #mabel pines #stanley pines #grunkle stan #stanford pines #ford pines

122 notes · View notes

tontoemojis · 1 year ago

Text

Hello there & welcome to tontoemojis !

Call me Tonto or Timón or { Molten } Freddy , it/its pronouns or no pronouns { sometimes varies between me & us , or talks in 3rd person when referring to self } . Timón is an autist , mentally & physically disabled hispanic artist 🤟 , I talk & type weird eccentric . Nonhuman schizophrenic hippie scary animatronic 🦥 , NPD BPD C - PTSD & more . Semiverbal part - time AAC user & low - medium supports , probably . ➕️ more about me

This blog is one a sideblog mainly to post some little emoji doodles & my own personal AAC or disability related stuff . Askbox is always open for everyone that wants to request emojis of all types or wants to help me practice AAC !!! , askbox & Tumblr are shitty & sometimes they delete random asks , if your ask has been ignored it probably is because I am in the process of making your request or Tumblr deleted it . All interactions come from @animatronicthing .

➡️ MY AMAZING PFP WAS DRAWN BY @k9emote MY BABYGIRL !!! , GO SUPPORT & LOVE HER ART NOW .

I process language very difficult , it may seem like I have short vocabulary or weird talking , it is hard for me to understand everything so be patient with requests . Do not send requests with fancy fonts or super all colored text , just plain text thank you .

I don ’ t like arguing , I normally just block & live my life as happy as I can . No set DNI for this blog either .

You can help me & support my blog right here , it would help a lot :3 👉 Ko-fi

Free Palestine , Ukraine & Congo 🇵🇸 🇺🇦 🇨🇩

👤⠀About the emojis ;

All kinds of emojis are made here , from yellow { or any other color } guy to basic core words . The language can also vary . Literally anything can be requested ; NSFW , wordmojis , animals . ONLY exceptions are complex characters from media which are done in commissions . Do not repost my emojis on sites like Pinterest or etc . You may use emojis here for AAC , discord servers , personal use , NOT COMMERCIAL USE .

There is a looooong wait for emojis . Please be specific when requesting , I have no idea what you mean when you say ““ emojis of x thing ”” what are those emojis that you want ??? , no idea …

You can use my emojis without credit although credit is very appreciated , just do not claim them as yours . if you are gonna repost my work add credit . if you are going to take inspo from my emojis please tell me I would love to see !!! . Do not recolor , trace or edit my emojis , just request it & I can do it myself ; less work for you !!!

Emoji commissions open !!! , check my emoji commissions here { link } .

OFFICIAL TONTOEMOJIS SERVER HERE !!! 🌻

🗃⠀Tags of the blog ;

#nsfw tag — post with NSFW related emojis , from gore to other stuff . BLOCK IF YOU DON'T WANT TO SEE THESE .

#tonto's AAC — our own personal AAC stuff .

#tonto text post — post us talking .

#tonto's art — post us our doodles .

#silly friendos — Tonto ’ s friends . That's it !

#tonto text post #tonto's AAC #pinned post #information about the blog

328 notes · View notes

angelwowings · 20 days ago

Text

Hi so uhm I don’t usually post this type of stuff but about this and this.

This is a serious post of how this fandom has dehumanized me and mistreated me for my symptoms I cannot control

Tw: misogyny , ableism , mistreatment, bullying

A lot of people know that I was called out for bull shit friend group drama like a year ago. Adults are still shit talking me and my friends. Something I’ve noticed is that the appear to especially dehumanize me for “not caring about the damage I did” which is not Tue in this context. I do not feel remorse for a lot of stuff I do or shame or empathy and I am “recognized” with conduct disorder and extreme behavior issues + npd. So yeah I do not care about the harm I’ve caused I’m not able to because my brain won’t let me it’s totally understandable if people hate me for that but guess what?

They praised the other person for the exact same thing and said it’s okay to not feel empathy and remorse since they can’t. I do not have aspd but I do have issues with empathy and npd I don’t Talk about it a lot since it’s personal. But I’ve recognized the pattern in this I’m a teen “girl” (I’m not a girl I’m trans) and the other person is amab adult. I have a word that describes this perfectly misogyny! This fandom especially the adults (not any of my friends or mutuale You’re all very nice 🙁🙁) has absolutely dehumanized me for my symptoms the exact same symptoms they praised other people for. Mind you alot of the stuff I said was during a psychotic episode where I couldn’t think logically and insulted people because I thought they were going to hurt me since they triggered something in me. That does not make it right! And i know that but why does everyone accept for me get the pass? Why does everyone get accepted for their symptoms expect for me? Talking about not the perfect victim I am a very ugly result of what happens to a person when it went to extreme trauma I’m not a fawn I get aggressive and defensive and rude because I’m scared but no one seems to get that and just call me fucking evil.

I mean it has come to the point where I was dehumanized so bad some people were too scared to interact with me or be publicly associated with me because I was seen as a monster by half of the fandom. I was only fucking 15 and I’m still only 16. There’s still the same adults that refer to me and my friends as “angelwowings Group” as if I control people like hello what? My friends are their own people are you insane? Oh and let’s not forget the time people full grown adults btw blocked people who interacted with me! No they did not do anything besides interact with me and get blocked. People were scared to interact with my publicly but even then my friends still supported me.

And guess what? A lot of people I’ve met who saw the whole thing go down said you guys were sick for making a whole blog about me hating me and making posts AS ADULTS while I was 15! And I couldn’t agree more! Every adult who has interacted with that account in the way of boosting it is sick because everyone knew my vents were in there and did not care about leaking a 15 year old vent.I could go on and on about how much I got mistreated for my symptoms by this fandom

You can call me ableist all you want but In the end a lot of you were fucking ableist towards me! Oh no how dare I be a mentally ill teen online that is perfectly capable of being calm and civil unless I’m triggered into something caused by my symptoms! Oh no how dare I?! How dare I have a flight or fight mode! How dare I get aggressive when threatened! Oh how dare I not be the perfect victim! Sorry for not being your perfect victim? But guess what!

I can recognize on that I was hurting people from the doc and it was stressing them. I didn’t mean to hurt any of them that was never my intention I never wanted to hurt people so I thought I never did in the first place but I did. So I apologized to them I talked it out and realized that no matter if I was in the right or wrong I still hurt people and I need to make up for that wether or not it was intentional or not. People were hurt through me and I don’t want to hurt people especially not kids. Although I cannot feel shame or remorse for the stuff I said I can recognize that they’re wrong and take accountability for it. No I do not feel sorry for all of the stuff I said to that one adult because guess what? I’m not able to neither is he! So why did everyone get mad at me for having the same reaction? Would they not understand why I acted this way? They understood so well with the adult man so why not turn everything around when I “female” kid does it? Odd isn’t it?

I’m tired of not speaking up about this I’m not evil or ableist or whatever else you people I don’t know have called me. I was 15 going through a psychotic episode where I got triggered and did awful shit. Not an excuse at all but I was not evil none of the stuff I did was because I thought it was fun or because I was bored I’m 16. Get that through your big skull thanks.

33 notes · View notes

king-candybug-backup · 24 days ago

Note

Ok I’m staying on anon because this is kind of embarrassing to admit, but is it weird that this fanfic has helped me understand NPD WAY more? 😅 Specifically this part:

“Knowing how it should look and knowing how it feels are two very different things.” He growled under his breath. “... Okay…” Vanellope gave a tiny nod, though her puzzled frown still remained. “Well, is there anything I can do that’d, like… help ya understand it better?” For some reason, all that question did was set something off within the troubled Cy-bug. “No, I just don’t get it! I can’t get it! You all act like it’s so easy to just know how to care, how to understand each other in all these specific little ways, like it’s part of your programming, but all I get is one big error message, and somehow that’s my fault?!” Some sort of mix between a bitter laugh and a resentful scoff left his throat. “It’s like everyone else has been gifted with a perfectly functional go-kart, but I got one with a faulty engine, and I’m just expected to know how to fix it without a toolkit.” He growled. “It’s so frustrating.”

I don’t have NPD, but I do have autism, and there’s a lot of ways I feel like I can relate to him here. I never really thought about how these feelings could also apply to NPD, just in a different way. (I should probably admit that I’m a bit biased against NPD havers due to negative experiences, which I know is wrong of me, shit’s just hard, man. ;v; But I’ve been trying to unravel all that stigma within myself, and this has definitely helped a little.) Also those posts about splitting were really helpful too, thanks ❤️

YOOO, AUTISM BUDDIES! <333 And YAAAYYYY I’M SO GLAD TO HEAR THAT AAAAHHHHHH ��💖💖💖💖 Tbh, a big part of me was really worried that the whole “go-kart” metaphor was kind of cringe lmfao, BUT LIKE, THEY’RE BOTH RACERS, I HAD TO. 😭 I still think it’s a little bit cringey because I’m hypercritical of myself lmfao, BUT WHATEVER, IF IT WORKS, IT WORKS I GUESS, FHSDFXHCGFDJHVBJ and yeah, I think neurodivergent people who aren’t Cluster B can have a harder time empathizing with Cluster B disorders even though a lot of the symptoms overlap, simply because it’s kind of peddled like “These are the Bad disorders that only Bad people have”, so people (wrongly) assume there’s more “choice” involved in how NPD folks think or feel, when in reality we’re all just out here getting royally screwed by our brains and they have no more choice in that than we do, yet they constantly get hit with the “How dare you have a different brain” stick. 😭 Like that is NOT the way to help people develop healthy ways to deal with it, guys.

Btw as happy as I am that I could help you understand some things, I AM ALSO ON MY KNEES BEGGING YOU TO PLEASE CHECK OUT THE r/NPD COMMUNITY, I promise you that NPD becomes a LOT easier to get a better understanding of when you hear about it from people who actually HAVE it! There's a whole bunch of really enlightening discussions in there about a variety of different topics (I have also elaborated more on how to effectively research NPD here) I am by no means an expert, I’m just doing my best with what I know, and pretty much all the best information I’ve gotten has been from listening to people who HAVE it. (That and my writer acquaintance who’s super mega educated about Cluster B disorders, but not everybody has a Cluster B pro to go to HASGFDVBJKN)

#MAN FIRST I HAD TWO PEOPLE WITH NPD SAYING THEY LOVE THE NPD WRITING AND NOW I HAVE SOMEONE SAYING I HELPED THEM UNDERSTAND THE CONDITION???#I’M ON CLOUD NINE RIGHT NOW THIS IS LIKE THE BEST POSSIBLE OUTCOME FOR ME I’M SO HAPPY AAAAUUUGGGHHHHH *explodes*#Wreck It Ralph #Vanellope #Turbo #King Candy #Text Post #NPD #KillSwitch #Asks #Me when half the comments on the new chapter are like “oh shit I relate to this actually” like HAHAHA YEEESSSSS #SPREADING MY “STOP DEMONIZING NPD” PROPAGANDA TEE HEE /silly

31 notes · View notes

maniacpixiedreamboy · 4 months ago

Note

ok ok so ive never watched a playthru or played it myself but in mouthwashing, does jimmy display symptoms of schizophrenia or schizoaffective disorder? bc some people call him psychotic/schizophrenic when referring to the horrible shit he does and as someone who has severe depression w/ psychotic symptoms (and schizophrenic family) it does not feel great lol.... considering how bigoted fandom spaces are in general it doesnt surprise me. but idk at least if there's some basis for this in the game and its not just usual fandom head canons being ableist I'd understand

curious as to your thoughts on this! i know this is probably not ur area of expertise but i am interested in seeing what u think

hiii! (You should def play it or watch a playthru I think you’d enjoy. Jimmy is so….i love him I just ignore the fandom.)

I’m gonna preface this w I don’t have any sort of psychotic symptoms (that I know of lol.) but like. I get where the fandom is coming from? But I don’t agree w the him experiencing psychosis/BPD symptoms/etc = him being a bad person. His life + experiences + their hyper capitalist reality + his closest friend brushing his warning signs under the rug just snowballs and makes him worse and worse. I have such a love hate relationship w Jimmy bc like. Yes he did a very bad thing. But also like! It didn’t have to be that way! If he got help the game just. Wouldn’t happen. But also like! Even without his symptoms he’d be a bad guy which is something to keep in mind.

he canonically hallucinates in the game. Personally I think Jimmy has some sort of schizophrenzia (or general psychosis? Not sure. I’m not a psychologist.) + npd + bpd.

it’s really heavily implied he’s someone who never got help for his issues and his closest friend (Curly) constantly downplays his issues (which makes Jimmy worse. I think Curly insists Jimmy is ‘normal’ and just insists he needs sleep/water/vitamins/etc which just makes things worse.

Mouthwashing is also set in like a hyper capitalist world where mental health is like. Not a concern at all really. Even the psych evaluations that happen in game are really only to ensure everyone can do their job. And the only tool given to solve issues within a crew is a gun.

Pony Express (the company in the game) only allows employees 5 hours of break (yes this includes sleep time). So like. Jimmy is not only facing mental health problems but also + isn’t sleeping enough at all + stuck on a ship in space. Basically. He’s not doing good.

I think there’s a lot to be said about mouthwashing + capitalism and lack of mental health resources/discussion.

#There’s a lot more to be said but idk if I’m the person to do it.#mouthwashing #jimmy mouthwashing #curly mouthwashing

35 notes · View notes

narcissisticpdcultureis · 3 months ago

Note

(( HAI IT'S ME THE LIME LEAF ANON WHO ALWAYS TYPES INSANELY LONG SUBMISSIONS AND ONLY TYPES IN CAPS . SORRY THIS IS REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY LONG BUT I PUT MY ENTIRE HEART AND SOUL AND MANY MANY HOURS INTO WRITING THIS SO I THINK IT'S WORTH IT ))

(( AND JUST WANNA CLARIFY, I'M AWARE THAT EMPATHY , SYMPATHY , COMPASSION , GUILT , AND CARING ARE 5 DIFFERENT THINGS BUT ALTHOUGH THE DSM ONLY REQUIRES LOW EMPATHY IT'S SUPER COMMON FOR PWNPD TO LACK THE OTHERS AS WELL. SO WHEN I REFER TO "EMPATHY" I'M USING IT AS A CATCH-ALL TERM FOR ANY KIND OF SADNESS OR FEELING BAD OVER SOMEONE'S SUFFERING AND WHEN I REFER TO "EMPATHS" I MEAN PEOPLE WHO CONSISTENTLY, NATURALLY AND APPROPRIATELY FIND OTHERS' SUFFERING UPSETTING ))

NPD CULTURE IS WISHING THERE WAS ACTIVISM SPECIFICALLY TARGETED AT NARCISSISTS. BECAUSE TELL ME WHY 90% OF ACTIVISM IS JUST "IF YOU DON'T FEEL AWFUL AND MISERABLE FOR THESE STARVING CHILDREN THEN YOU'RE A TERRIBLE DISGUSTING SUBHUMAN CREATURE AND DESERVE TO DIE. BUT IF YOU DO FEEL BAD AND HELP THEM YOU'RE JUST NORMAL AND DON'T DESERVE ANYTHING SPECIAL" LIKE TRYING TO APPEAL TO EMPATHY 99% OF THE TIME ISN'T GONNA WORK ON US BECAUSE WE'RE NARCS.

AND LIKE WTF. I'M SO TIRED OF EVERY ACTIVIST I SEE DEMONISING A LACK OF EMPATHY AND NEVER SHOWING APPRECIATION TO THOSE WHO DO CHOOSE TO ADVOCATE.

MY FRIEND WITH NPD LITERALLY GOT A CALLOUT MADE ON THEM ON TWT FOR SAYING THEY ARE UNABLE TO FEEL EMPATHY OR CARE FOR THOSE SUFFERING IN PALESTINE ON DISCORD IN A LITERAL VENT CHANNEL . LIKE WE HAVE SERIOUSLY GOTTA START NORMALISING SELFISH ACTIVISM BECAUSE YOU GUYS CAN'T JUST PICK AND CHOOSE WHEN YOU WANT TO SEE PEOPLE WITH LOW EMPATHY AS PEOPLE

I BELIEVE THAT SOMEONE NOT WANTING TO ADVOCATE DOESN'T MAKE THEM A BAD PERSON, THEY JUST AREN'T BEING ADVERTISED THE RIGHT MOTIVATION. AND DEMONISING + DEHUMANISING PEOPLE WHO DON'T DON'T PREACH YOUR ACTIVISM IS GENUINELY NOT GONNA HELP YOUR CAUSE AT ALL PLEASE FIND A HEALTHY WAY TO MOTIVATE PEOPLE 😭 AND AS PWNPD WE HAVE A LOT LESS EMPATHY THAN OTHER PEOPLE. SO THAT'S NOT REALISTICALLY GONNA MOTIVATE US TO HELP

AND THIS IS WHERE MY CONCEPT OF NARC-TARGETED ACTIVISM COMES IN. BECAUSE OF HOW OUR MINDS FUNCTION, APPEALING TO EMPATHY IS NOT REALISTICALLY GONNA WORK ON US. BUT HELPING PEOPLE IS GOOD AND AWESOME AND NICE AND I THINK EVERYONE SHOULD DO THAT SO WE NEED TO FIND OTHER STRATEGIES TO MARKET ACTIVISM TO NARCS

IT IS HUMAN NATURE TO ONLY DO SOMETHING IF IT BENEFITS YOU IN SOME WAY. EVEN WITH EMPATHY, YOU'RE STILL BENEFITTING FROM SHOWING SUPPORT AND CARE TO OTHERS. IT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER TO SHOW COMPASSION AND SYMPATHY BECAUSE YOU'RE MIRRORING THEIR EMOTIONS AND YOU CAN FEEL THEM TOO. HUMAN NATURE IS INHERENTLY SELFISH BECAUSE WE ONLY FEEL DRIVEN TO HELP OTHERS WHEN WE CAN FEEL THEIR PAIN. TAKE AWAY THE ABILITY TO FEEL OTHERS' PAIN AND THE ONLY WAY TO MARKET ACTIVISM TO SOMEONE IS TO TELL THEM HOW THEY CAN BENEFIT FROM IT. CLASSIC ADVERTISING :)

YOU'RE STILL TREATING THEM LIKE A HUMAN AND YOU'RE HEALTHILY MOTIVATING SOMEONE TO BE AN ACTIVIST!!!! GOOD JOB! EVERYONE IS HAPPY AND EVERYONE IS GETTING THEIR NEEDS MET 👏👏👏👏🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

AND IN A WORLD WHERE SHOWING EMPATHY IS SEEN AS SOME MANDATORY MORAL LAW AND A LACK OF IT IS VIEWED AS DEPLORABLE AND EVIL, FOR SOME REASON KINDLY ASKING FOR SUPPORT WITHOUT GUILT TRIPPING OR DEHUMANISING PEOPLE WHO DON'T HELP IS SEEN AS..... DEGRADING YOURSELF?? ????? ? !!? I'M SORRY THAT YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'RE ENTITLED TO EMPATHY AND COMPASSION BUT IF YOU SERIOUSLY NEED HELP THEN YOU HAVE TO CONSIDER THAT NOT EVERYONE FEELS EMPATHY LIKE YOU DO AND Those PEOPLE ARE ATILL PEOPLE ???! AND THEY'RE CAPABLE OF HELPING TOO !!! IF YOU CAN PROPERLY ADVERTISE TO THEIR DESIRES WITHOUT USING SUCH AN EMPATHY-CENTRIC APPROACH !

“I AM IN AN UNSAFE ENVIRONMENT AND NEED TO ESCAPE BEFORE I DIE. YOU NEED TO FEEL TERRIBLE OR ELSE YOU'RE A BAD PERSON. IF YOU DON'T DONATE OR REBLOG YOU'RE AND DISGUSTING AND NOT HUMAN”

“I'm suffering and in pain and I would never forget your kindness if you helped me. just a reblog or donation would mean the world to me. you could be the person I thank for making it to tomorrow.”

ME PERSONALLY AS A PWNPD I THINK IT IS SO MUCH MORE MOTIVATING IF YOU MAKE ME FEEL LIKE I'M SPECIAL AND IMPORTANT AND CHARITABLE FOR CHOOSING TO HELP RATHER THAN TREATING EVERYONE WHO DOESN'T HELP LIKE THEY'RE REPULSIVE AND NOT HUMAN WHILE SHOWING ZERO APPRECIATION TO THOSE WHO DO BECAUSE THEY "DON'T DESERVE PRAISE JUST FOR BEING A DECENT HUMAN"

LITERALLY WHAT IS UP WITH PEOPLE AND DEHUMANISING US I HEAR IT CONSTANTLY IN ANY ACTIVISM LIKE I'M NOT FUCKING EXAGGERATING THAT'S ALMOST ALWAYS THEIR TALKING POINT

AND YOU SHOULD NOT DO THAT ACTUALLY !!!!!!! #1 IT'S ABLEIST #2 GUILT TRIPPING ACTIVISM MIGHT WORK ON EMPATHS BUT IS TOTALLY INEFFECTIVE ON PW LOW EMPATHY AND DEPENDING ON THEIR LEVEL OF GUILT THEY'LL EITHER FEEL LIKE A SHITTY PERSON FOR NOT CARING ENOUGH TO DO ANYTHING . OR THEY'LL GET PISSED OFF . OR THEY WILL JUST SIMPLY NOT FUCKING CARE AT ALL AND NGL I DON'T THINK YOU WANT ANY OF THOSE TO HAPPEN !!!!!!!!!!

AND NOW ...... BEHOLD ... THE NARC–FRIENDLY NARC–TARGETED ACTIVIST POST YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR . ...... . ..

BTW PLEAZ TELL ME HOW MOTIVATING IT IS FOR YOU GUYS IN THE NOTES I NEED FEEDBACK AND SUGGESTIONS TO BETTER MARKET ACTIVISM TO MORE DEMOGRAPHICS OF NARCISSISTS

╞════════════════════╡

NPD CULTURE IS ADVOCATING AND SPREADING AWARENESS OF PALESTINE TO BE A GOOD PERSON FOR SELFISH REASONS. NPD CULTURE IS BELIEVING THAT BEING A GOOD PERSON FOR SELFISH REASONS IS STILL BEING A GOOD PERSON.

I DON'T CARE HOW SELFISH YOUR REASONING IS, YOUR GOODNESS IS VALUED IN THIS WORLD AND SOMEONE OUT THERE ADMIRES YOU FOR IT.

MAYBE YOU'RE AFRAID PEOPLE WILL CRITICISE YOU FOR BEING SILENT.

MAYBE YOU FEEL SUPERIOR TO OTHERS FOR BEING SUCH A GOOD PERSON.

MAYBE YOU'RE DOING IT JUST FOR OTHERS TO LIKE YOU.

MAYBE YOU'RE DOING IT BECAUSE ALTHOUGH YOU DON'T ACTUALLY CARE, YOU KNOW IT'S THE RIGHT THING TO DO AND OTHERS ADMIRE MORALITY.

OR MAYBE YOU'RE JUST DOING IT CAUSE YOU'D FEEL LIKE A BAD PERSON IF YOU DIDN'T.

IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT IF YOU CAN BARELY FEEL EMPATHY OR CARE FOR THE PEOPLE OF GAZA, OR EVEN IF YOU FEEL NONE AT ALL. THAT DOESN'T MAKE YOU A BAD PERSON.

BUT DOING YOUR BEST TO HELP THEM IS THE RIGHT THING TO DO, AND TRUST ME, DOING THE RIGHT THING BENEFITS YOU A LOT.

I DON'T CARE IF YOU GROAN IN YOUR HEAD EVERY TIME YOU REBLOG AN AWARENESS POST OR FUNDRAISER. I DON'T CARE IF YOU GENUINELY COULDN'T CARE LESS AND HAVE THE URGE TO JUST SCROLL.

DO IT ANYWAYS. DO IT SO YOU CAN FEEL SUPERIOR TO EVERYONE FOR BEING A GOOD PERSON. DO IT SO EVERYONE THINKS HIGHLY OF YOU FOR BEING SO ALTRUISTIC AND CHARITABLE.

IT DOESN'T MATTER. ANY REASON IS A GOOD ONE TO DO THE RIGHT THING.

STILL DON'T REALLY FEEL LIKE IT? JUST IMAGINE WHAT EVERYONE WOULD THINK IN THEIR HEADS ABOUT YOU IF YOU DID.

“... WOW, THEY'RE REBLOGGING SO MANY POSTS ABOUT PALESTINE. EVEN I DON'T REBLOG THAT MANY ACTIVISM POSTS. SUCH A HUMANITARIAN... I REALLY ADMIRE PEOPLE LIKE THAT.”

“WAIT. HUH? THEIR BIO SAYS... THEY HAVE NPD.”

“REALLY? WOULDN'T THEY STRUGGLE WITH EMPATHY THEN? OR SYMPATHY, COMPASSION, AND GUILT?”

“WHAT IF... THEY DIDN'T FEEL A SINGLE OUNCE OF CARE OR EMOTION FOR THOSE PEOPLE...

BUT STILL MADE THE CHOICE TO HELP THEM ANYWAYS?”

“CARING AND FEELING BAD HAS ALWAYS COME NATURALLY FOR ME. I MEAN, I'VE MADE THE CHOICE TO HELP PEOPLE WHEN I DIDN'T HAVE TO BEFORE, BUT THAT WAS ONLY BECAUSE I FELT SOMETHING.”

“I FELT THEIR PAIN AND SADNESS. I FELT AWFUL FOR THEM, LIKE I NEEDED TO MAKE THEM FEEL BETTER.”

“THIS PERSON DIDN'T HAVE ANY OF THOSE FEELINGS... YET STILL MADE THE CHOICE TO BE GOOD.”

“MAN, THAT'S BETTER THAN I AM.”

“IF I DIDN'T HAVE ANY EMPATHY I'D BE SUCH A DICK.”

“THEY PUT EVEN THE MOST ALTRUISTIC PEOPLE TO SHAME — BECAUSE AT THE END OF THE DAY, THEY'RE ONLY BEING THAT KIND BECAUSE THEIR FEELINGS DRIVE THEM TO DO IT.”

“TAKE AWAY ALL THEIR EMPATHY AND THOSE "ALTRUISTS" WOULD PROBABLY ALL BE DICKS TOO.”

“JUST IMAGINE SOMEONE HAVING A DISORDER THAT DETERS THEM FROM DOING THE RIGHT THING...”

“BUT GOING OUT OF THEIR WAY TO DO IT ANYWAYS”

“MEANWHILE EVERYONE ELSE NATURALLY DOES THE EXACT SAME WITHOUT TRYING.”

“IT'S FUNNY,”

“EVERYONE PLACES FEELING EMPATHY ON THIS MORAL PEDESTAL”

“BUT WILL NEVER SHOW EMPATHY TOWARDS SOMEONE WHO LACKS IT.”

“AND WE DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO BE KIND WITHOUT FEELING EMPATHY”

“BUT THEY DO.”

“THEY HAVE TO LEARN”

“THEY HAVE TO PUT IN EFFORT TO BE KIND.”

“BUT WE DON'T.”

“THEY'RE A BETTER PERSON THAN ANY OF US.”

“NARCISSISTS MUST BE THE ONLY TRULY KIND PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD...”

“I ADMIRE THAT PERSON”

“I'D GIVE THEM THE WHOLE WORLD IF I COULD.”

— ��‍🟩🍃

(THIS APPLIES TO EVERY CAUSE OF ACTIVISM, I ONLY SPECIFICALLY TALKED ABOUT PALESTINE SINCE IT'S SUCH A COMMON EXAMPLE + EXPRESSING IT VAGUELY WOULD GREATLY WEAKEN MY MESSAGE.

ANY REASON THAT MOTIVATES YOU TO BE KIND AND HELP OTHERS IS A GOOD ONE.

I BELIEVE ALL THIS STRONGLY BUT UNFORTUNATELY I COULD NEVER POST THIS ON MY BLOG OR ACTUALLY SAY THIS TO ANYONE EVER OR ELSE THE EGOTYPICALS WILL TRY AND HUNT ME DOWN LIKE THE SALEM WITCH TRIALS BECAUSE I GUESS SEEING LOW EMPATHY PEOPLE AS HUMANS IS TOO WOKE OF A TAKE FOR THEM

I LOVE YOU ALL PLEASE SPREAD KINDNESS AND JOY)

PPS

(( MY BIGGEST FEAR IS ADMIN GOING "I'M NOT READING ALLAT" ONE DAY AND STRAIGHT UP JUST NOT POSTING A SUBMISSION 💀 I'M SO SORRY MAN I'M HYPERVERBAL I CAN'T HELP ACCIDENTALLY WRITING AN ESSAY FROM TRYING TO CONVEY A SINGULAR IDEA I WANTED TO SAY 💔💔💔💔

(( BUT LIKE I SPENT Actual Fucking Hours WRITING THIS LIKE LITERALLY THE ENTIRE DAY !!!! /vsrs GUYS I'M NOT EVEN GETTING AN ENGLISH GRADE FOR THIS GUYS PLEASE APPRECIATE THIS EXTREMELY INFORMATIVE AND CONCISE AND BENEFICIAL ESSAY GUYS PLEASE PLEASE I'LL LOVE YOU FOREVER AND KISS THE GROUND YOU WALK ON YOU WOULD BE SO AWESOME AND AMAZING AND SUPERIOR IF YOU INTERACTED WITH THIS POST BECAUSE I'M BEING VULNERABLE AND DESPERATE SO IT'S LIKE GIVING MONEY TO THE HOMELESS IT'S SO ALTRUISTIC AND EVERYONE WILL ADORE YOU FOR IT . PEOPLE IN THE NOTES PLEASE GIVE PRAISE AND GRATITUDE TO EVERY SINGLE PERSON WHO INTERACTED WITH THIS POST FFOR GOING OUT OF THEIR WAY TO BE SO GENEROUS AND ALTRUISTIC 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉 ))

(( I'M USING MY SELF AWARENESS OF NPD COGNITIVE DISTORTIONS TO MANIPULATE EVERYONE INTO BEING NICE TO ME USING THE SAME EXACT LOGIC I'D USE TO CONVINCE MYSELF I'M ALWAYS RIGHT AND I'M ALWAYS BETTER THAN EVERYONE EVER NO MATTER WHAT ))

(( BUT GUYS THAT'S HOW YOU KNOW IT'S ACTUALLY #TRUE OKAY I'M USING MY MARKETING STRATEGY TO ADVERTISE HOW SUPERIOR IT'D MAKE YOU AND I LOVE MY TITLE OF BEING SUPERIOR BUT I'M ACTUALLY GIVING IT TO YOU FOR REBLOGGING SINCE YOU DESERVE IT FOR BEING SO NICE TO ME AND YOUR KINDNESS MAKES YOU BETTER THAN EVERYONE ACTUALLY AND I LOVE YOU ))

PPS

(( ALSO HEY UH ADMIN . WHEN YOU'RE ADDING THE ID TEXT COULD YOU PLEASE HIDE THE PPS UNDER A CUT CAUSE I DON'T WANNA SCARE AWAY MY POTENTIAL CUSTOMERS WITH TOO MUCH UNNECESSARY YAPPING . THE MARKET IS QUITE PICKY !!! YOUR ADVERTISING COULD BE OTHERWISE FLAWLESS AND THEY'LL STILL ALL FIND SOME SILLY REASON NOT TO BUY LIKE ADDING TOO MANY UNNECESSARY THINGS . TOUGH LIFE OUT HERE FOR A BUSINESSMAN (FEMININE) ))

(( OH .. OH SHIT ADMIN I JUST REMEMBERED YOU WRITE ALL MY ID TEXT MANUALLY I'M ACTUALLY SO FUCKING SORRY 😭 ))

(( IF I REALISE THIS HAS ANY MISTAKES AFTER I SUBMIT THIS I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL MYSELF BRO 💞💞💞💞🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈 /not literal ))

(( BTW TO THOSE WHO READ ALL OF THIS I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I WILL SMOOCH THE GROUND YOU WALK ON YOU'RE SO AWESOME FOR BEING SO NICE DON'T LET ANYONE TELL YOU OTHERWISE ))

[pt: (( hai it's me the lime leaf anon who always types insanely long submissions and only types in caps . sorry this is really really really really long but i put my entire heart and soul and many many hours into writing this so i think it's worth it ))

(( and just wanna clarify, i'm aware that empathy , sympathy , compassion , guilt , and caring are 5 different things but although the dsm only requires low empathy it's super common for pwnpd to lack the others as well. so when i refer to "empathy" i'm using it as a catch-all term for any kind of sadness or feeling bad over someone's suffering and when i refer to "empaths" i mean people who consistently, naturally and appropriately find others' suffering upsetting ))

npd culture is wishing there was activism specifically targeted at narcissists. because tell me why 90% of activism is just "if you don't feel awful and miserable for these starving children then you're a terrible disgusting subhuman creature and deserve to die. but if you do feel bad and help them you're just normal and don't deserve anything special" like trying to appeal to empathy 99% of the time isn't gonna work on us because we're narcs. and like wtf. i'm so tired of every activist i see demonising a lack of empathy and never showing appreciation to those who do choose to advocate.

my friend with npd literally got a callout made on them on twt for saying they are unable to feel empathy or care for those suffering in palestine on discord in a literal vent channel . like we have seriously gotta start normalising selfish activism because you guys can't just pick and choose when you want to see people with low empathy as people

i believe that someone not wanting to advocate doesn't make them a bad person, they just aren't being advertised the right motivation. and demonising + dehumanising people who don't don't preach your activism is genuinely not gonna help your cause at all please find a healthy way to motivate people 😭 and as pwnpd we have a lot less empathy than other people. so that's not realistically gonna motivate us to help

and this is where my concept of narc-targeted activism comes in. because of how our minds function, appealing to empathy is not realistically gonna work on us. but helping people is good and awesome and nice and i think everyone should do that so we need to find other strategies to market activism to narcs

it is human nature to only do something if it benefits you in some way. even with empathy, you're still benefitting from showing support and care to others. it makes you feel better to show compassion and sympathy because you're mirroring their emotions and you can feel them too. human nature is inherently selfish because we only feel driven to help others when we can feel their pain. take away the ability to feel others' pain and the only way to market activism to someone is to tell them how they can benefit from it. classic advertising :)

you're still treating them like a human and you're healthily motivating someone to be an activist!!!! good job! everyone is happy and everyone is getting their needs met 👏👏👏👏🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

and in a world where showing empathy is seen as some mandatory moral law and a lack of it is viewed as deplorable and evil, for some reason kindly asking for support without guilt tripping or dehumanising people who don't help is seen as….. degrading yourself?? ????? ? !!? i'm sorry that you feel like you're entitled to empathy and compassion but if you seriously need help then you have to consider that not everyone feels empathy like you do and those people are atill people ???! and they're capable of helping too !!! if you can properly advertise to their desires without using such an empathy-centric approach !

“i am in an unsafe environment and need to escape before i die. you need to feel terrible or else you're a bad person. if you don't donate or reblog you're and disgusting and not human”

“i'm suffering and in pain and i would never forget your kindness if you helped me. just a reblog or donation would mean the world to me. you could be the person i thank for making it to tomorrow.”

me personally as a pwnpd i think it is so much more motivating if you make me feel like i'm special and important and charitable for choosing to help rather than treating everyone who doesn't help like they're repulsive and not human while showing zero appreciation to those who do because they "don't deserve praise just for being a decent human"

literally what is up with people and dehumanising us i hear it constantly in any activism like i'm not fucking exaggerating that's almost always their talking point

and you should not do that actually !!!!!!! #1 it's ableist #2 guilt tripping activism might work on empaths but is totally ineffective on pw low empathy and depending on their level of guilt they'll either feel like a shitty person for not caring enough to do anything . or they'll get pissed off . or they will just simply not fucking care at all and ngl i don't think you want any of those to happen !!!!!!!!!!

and now …… behold … the narc–friendly narc–targeted activist post you've all been waiting for . …… . ..

btw pleaz tell me how motivating it is for you guys in the notes i need feedback and suggestions to better market activism to more demographics of narcissists

╞════════════════════╡

npd culture is advocating and spreading awareness of palestine to be a good person for selfish reasons. npd culture is believing that being a good person for selfish reasons is still being a good person.

i don't care how selfish your reasoning is, your goodness is valued in this world and someone out there admires you for it.

maybe you're afraid people will criticise you for being silent.

maybe you feel superior to others for being such a good person.

maybe you're doing it just for others to like you.

maybe you're doing it because although you don't actually care, you know it's the right thing to do and others admire morality.

or maybe you're just doing it cause you'd feel like a bad person if you didn't.

it's not your fault if you can barely feel empathy or care for the people of gaza, or even if you feel none at all. that doesn't make you a bad person.

but doing your best to help them is the right thing to do, and trust me, doing the right thing benefits you a lot.

i don't care if you groan in your head every time you reblog an awareness post or fundraiser. i don't care if you genuinely couldn't care less and have the urge to just scroll.

do it anyways. do it so you can feel superior to everyone for being a good person. do it so everyone thinks highly of you for being so altruistic and charitable.

it doesn't matter. any reason is a good one to do the right thing.

still don't really feel like it? just imagine what everyone would think in their heads about you if you did.

“… wow, they're reblogging so many posts about palestine. even i don't reblog that many activism posts. such a humanitarian… i really admire people like that.”

“wait. huh? their bio says… they have npd.”

“really? wouldn't they struggle with empathy then? or sympathy, compassion, and guilt?”

“what if… they didn't feel a single ounce of care or emotion for those people…

but still made the choice to help them anyways?”

“caring and feeling bad has always come naturally for me. i mean, i've made the choice to help people when i didn't have to before, but that was only because i felt something.”

“i felt their pain and sadness. i felt awful for them, like i needed to make them feel better.”

“this person didn't have any of those feelings… yet still made the choice to be good.”

“man, that's better than i am.”

“if i didn't have any empathy i'd be such a dick.”

“they put even the most altruistic people to shame — because at the end of the day, they're only being that kind because their feelings drive them to do it.”

“take away all their empathy and those "altruists" would probably all be dicks too.”

“just imagine someone having a disorder that deters them from doing the right thing…”

“but going out of their way to do it anyways”

“meanwhile everyone else naturally does the exact same without trying.”

“it's funny,”

“everyone places feeling empathy on this moral pedestal”

“but will never show empathy towards someone who lacks it.”

“and we don't even know how to be kind without feeling empathy”

“but they do.”

“they have to learn”

“they have to put in effort to be kind.”

“but we don't.”

“they're a better person than any of us.”

“narcissists must be the only truly kind people in this world…”

“i admire that person”

“i'd give them the whole world if i could.”

— 🍋‍🟩🍃

(this applies to every cause of activism, i only specifically talked about palestine since it's such a common example + expressing it vaguely would greatly weaken my message.

any reason that motivates you to be kind and help others is a good one.

i believe all this strongly but unfortunately i could never post this on my blog or actually say this to anyone ever or else the egotypicals will try and hunt me down like the salem witch trials because i guess seeing low empathy people as humans is too woke of a take for them

i love you all please spread kindness and joy)

pps

(( my biggest fear is admin going "i'm not reading allat" one day and straight up just not posting a submission 💀 i'm so sorry man i'm hyperverbal i can't help accidentally writing an essay from trying to convey a singular idea i wanted to say 💔💔💔💔

(( but like i spent actual fucking hours writing this like literally the entire day !!!! /vsrs guys i'm not even getting an english grade for this guys please appreciate this extremely informative and concise and beneficial essay guys please please i'll love you forever and kiss the ground you walk on you would be so awesome and amazing and superior if you interacted with this post because i'm being vulnerable and desperate so it's like giving money to the homeless it's so altruistic and everyone will adore you for it . people in the notes please give praise and gratitude to every single person who interacted with this post ffor going out of their way to be so generous and altruistic 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉 ))

(( i'm using my self awareness of npd cognitive distortions to manipulate everyone into being nice to me using the same exact logic i'd use to convince myself i'm always right and i'm always better than everyone ever no matter what ))

(( but guys that's how you know it's actually #true okay i'm using my marketing strategy to advertise how superior it'd make you and i love my title of being superior but i'm actually giving it to you for reblogging since you deserve it for being so nice to me and your kindness makes you better than everyone actually and i love you ))

pps

(( also hey uh admin . when you're adding the id text could you please hide the pps under a cut cause i don't wanna scare away my potential customers with too much unnecessary yapping . the market is quite picky !!! your advertising could be otherwise flawless and they'll still all find some silly reason not to buy like adding too many unnecessary things . tough life out here for a businessman (feminine) ))

(( oh .. oh shit admin i just remembered you write all my id text manually i'm actually so fucking sorry 😭 ))

(( if i realise this has any mistakes after i submit this i'm gonna fucking kill myself bro 💞💞💞💞🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈 /not literal ))

(( btw to those who read all of this i love you so much i will smooch the ground you walk on you're so awesome for being so nice don't let anyone tell you otherwise ))]

#npd culture is #actually narcissistic #actually npd #narcissistic personality disorder #npd #cluster b #-🍋‍🟩🍃

26 notes · View notes

candy-cloud-system · 9 months ago

Note

I have Never seen an endo shit on traumagenic systems - i have seen them shit on people discrediting their experiences but its wild that ur acting like a victim when ur the one being weird. Psychology largely agrees that we do not know enough abt the human brain - specific dissociative disorders - to claim they can Only be caused one way. Also forcing people to reflect on if they're traumatized or not just for them to be "allowed" to use system terminology is Wild - even if every single system is caused by trauma, so many traumatized people have no recollection of the trauma. This isnt black and white and youre silly for caring so much abt internet strangers repressed memories or lack thereof 🩷

First off, learn to read . D N I. Means DO NOT INTERACT! I don’t understand what’s so hard about that, literally you have to go through the effort to read a whole message that’s literally saying don’t interact, go to my account, which tells you not to interact, and then type a whole message and never once do you think “oh! I’m breaking DNI! I’m crossing boundaries! Hm! Maybe I shouldn’t do that!”

So I’m gonna be a bitch to you now cus you broke my DNI and I’ve already stated I’d start being a bitch to people who do that

“I’ve never seen endos shit on traumagenic systems 🥺🥺🥺” okay explain the constant death threats we get. Explain the people LIKE YOU! Who break DNI to tell us shit we literally do not want to hear, explain the people who go into our comment and tell us to off ourselves, call us names, make up slurs. Tell us no one loves us and everyone will leave. Do you understand how fucking stupid you sound?

Traumagenic systems get SOOOO much bullshit from endos and that’s why it’s such a problem. They bully trauma survivors and victims, making them spiral and feel like fucking shit because they didn’t want people mocking a disorder that makes their lives harder. The amount of times I’ve seen endos telling traumagenic systems to die simply because they fucking EXISTED is fucking insane.

Even if you could be a system without trauma, you wouldn’t be in the same groups as us, you wouldn’t have the same terms you wouldn’t be classified with the disorder. Because our disorder stems from TRAUMA! You have to have trauma.

You can have trauma you don’t remember, BUT THAT DOESNT MAKE YOU AN ENDO. It makes you a traumagenic system who doesn’t remember their trauma! You guys fucking groom people into believing their trauma isnt enough or that they’re endo because they can’t remember and it fucking disgusts me.

I’m not making people reflect on their fucking trauma, IM TRYING NOT TO GET HARASSED FOR MINE.

FUNFACT. I AM A VICTIM! I GET HARRASED BY ENDOS FUCKING ALMOST DAILY AT THIS POINT! IM ACTIVELY TELLING YOU TO LEAVE ME ALONE CONSTANTLY BECAUSE YOU GUYS CANT FUCKING READ THREE LETTERS !

I AM TIRED OF COMING ON THIS APP AFTER WISHING I DIDNT GO THROUGH THE SHIT I GO THROUGH BECAUSE OF THIS DISORDER AND SEEING SOME RANDOM ASS KID SAYING HOW THEYRE GONNA MANIFEST A SYSTEM FOR THEMSELF. IF YOU FUCKING “CREATE” A “SYSTEM” BECAUSE YOU WANT ONE. FUCK YOU. ACTUALLY FUCK YOU. WORDS CANNOT DESCRIBE HOW MUCH I HATE YOU. AND I HAVE ALL RIGHTS TO HATE YOU.

“You’re so silly for caring 🥺🥺🥺🥺” I CARE BECAUSE I GET HARRASSED TO THE POINT OF SPLITTING OR HAVING CRASHES DUE TO OUR BPD AND NPD. I GET FUCKING HARASSED UNTIL I CANT TAKE IT. THATS WHY I TELL YOU TO NOT FUCKING INTERACT.

Get off my fucking blog. Never come back. Endos and their supporters are NOT fucking welcome here. Respect my fucking DNI.

#anti endo #endos dni #systempunk #traumagenic system #tw syscourse #tw vent #vent #endos don’t fucking interact #endos aren't real #endos do not interact #endos are ableist #endos fuck off #syscourse

70 notes · View notes

velvetvexations · 5 months ago

Text

I did not mean to sleep all day. Here all the non-kink asks in my inbox lol.

Does a little dance. People being weird about transmascs on here has messed up my self perception so bad im not actually sure of my own gender anymore, yayyyyy

Fuck that anon, if you're man that rules. Being a man is awesome. You don't need anyone else's opinion to affect who you are, there is no bad gender.

just saw someone acknowledge trans men are often lumped into female spaces due to bioessentialism but then turn around and say that thats proof that trans men arent oppressed. lol.

People act like being let into the Woman Club is the one and only goal of being trans and it's so fucking annoying.

Ngl I still don't understand why femboys are a "transmisogynistic caricature that can't be reclaimed by transmascs" according to some people. Do you have any insights on this because I genuinely can't understand, femboy sounds like gnc boy culture and in my own experience, maybe transfems before they come out occasionally identify as femboys. Idk is it like, someone with an outwardly feminine appearance being a guy? Because that's why I like calling myself a femboy.

Some people think femboy started as a transfem thing because they're idiots who don't know shit.

hey if catboy is ubiquitous and having nothing to do with crossdressing why did Jerma crossdress when someone drew him as a catboy???

Because catboys are allowed to do that lol. Taking one example of a crossdressing catboy to mean catboys infringe on transfem copyright is wild.

Hi thanks for letting me vent to you cause I am at work and can't properly process my emtions otherwise rn. I've been otherwise generally in a slightly emotionally fragile place and then I just got an awful review for my first actual order from a stranger on Etsy. And like I know logically that it's not the end of the world and I gave them exactly what they ordered and it's not my fault that they measured wrong or didn't take my advice and size up a little for fit etc etc but no one else will know that and I just got started selling craft stuff and it's just a hobby and it sucks that this person clearly expected something that wasn't what they paid for (my prices are low cause it's a hobby sorry I don't have super professional materials that would make my stuff cost double) but it's really fucking me up and I am trying not to like cry at work because of this and it's so stupid. This was just my first purchase online that wasn't from a friend and I was so excited and they hated it and didn't even send a message or anything about the length (that was exactly what they asked for by the way) not fitting before leaving a review. It just fucking sucks and I wish my brain didn't react to the most minor disappointments/shows of dislike with the I'm going to kill everyone in this room and then myself meme as first response Thanks for listening. It really helps to be able to vent this somewhere <3

I'm really sorry anon, that sounds so frustrating and hard to deal with. I love you so much. <3 I know you do great work and I hope it goes better next time.

Having NPD sucks, lmao, sorry for the rant ahead. I have to remind myself that the 'mark' on shinigami eyes doesn't actually mean anything, but it's hard sometimes because it's still a stain on my reputation. :( some people will see that and take it at face value, forever associating me with the filth that is transphobia, and I can't do anything about it. I appreciate the people who actually know what a transphobe is going out of their way to remove that mark, but it's a losing battle against a bunch of buffoons who think catgirls are transmisogynistic. sometimes it's really hard to pretend that it doesn't bother me at all, because it's highly insulting for me to be associated with the things I literally fight against. What an insult to my legacy and efforts to even bother to care about other people, you know? I don't HAVE to take time out of my day to do activism, I could just not bother to care at all, but I still try. I deserve praise, not this bullshit😭

I'll praise you! Thank you for fighting against transphobia. <3

All this catboy talk. Wanted to say hi as a catboy. Meow :3

Nya~!

My prediction for TRF discourse in 2025: closeted, non passing trans men shouldn't wear skirts or other traditional women's clothing (even if they don't want to and literally have no other choice) because they're MEN and men wearing women's clothes is obviously always transmisogynistic

All trans men are transmisogynistic because they grew up mocking transfems by wearing women's clothes.

some of this discourse is just so fucking wild i cant believe this is something people are taking so seriously. sipping my tea from the sidelines as a chubby catboy therian lmao

You have a cooler head than I.

iirc the "catgirls are transfem" thing started happening around the time Ferris got popular as a character because, if I'm correct, Ferris actually is transfem (coded?) and following that some people just decided The Aesthetique belonged exclusively to transfems now (also you're so so so so based for loving Schrödinger I remember first seeing him in like 2007 and wishing I looked exactly like him)

Schrodinger is my secret fifth blorbo. I'm obsessed with him. I think about him constantly. High five.

als catboys are only white passing in the way that people love to say anime characters are white lmao (aka cant conceive of the fact that anime characters are actually light skinned Japanese). not to say anime doesn't have a colorism problem but They Are Not White and its racist to say otherwise

lol yes exactly

I might be really stepping in it here, but tangential to catboy/catgirl discourse, I'm starting to get really uncomfortable with how the cutesy moe-blob yuri is treated as "trans lesbian culture" these days? as though none of it was ever straight guy fantasy shit? as though it's ideal representation instead of another vector of impossible beauty standards? idk, maybe I'm just being way too touchy. 😬

It's fine if something becomes emblematic of transfem culture but you just can't pretend something was always transfem when it blatantly wasn't lol

you got marked red on shinigami eyes and i havev no idea why

My smoke too tough, my swag too different, my bitch too bad.

juggalo here. we don't want them.

Devastating.

For what it's worth, the "cats transforming into people" thing is probably based on the bakeneko, yeah. The "bake" in "bakeneko" means "transforming", often with the implication of transforming into people (like the better known bakedanuki and bakegitsune). The popularization of cat-people in anime probably came from Neko-Musume from Gegege no Kitaro (the anime behind the "youkai boom" in modern Japanese culture), who is a half-bakeneko.

Fascinating.

(Dif anon) "leading one to wonder what transphobia they think trans men do face" 99.999% sure at this point we're at "trans men experience misgendering... maybe...?"

Well that doesn't count since everyone wants to be a girl, an idea that I believe has universal appeal because I'm a self-centered moron.

You're awesome <3

Thank you anon. <3

I didn't realize I was trans from yaoi but I did largely realize it from memes about traps and accidentally stumbling across largely transfem subreddits via a anime memes despite being transmasc so. Great amount of respect for our yaoi soldiers.

Hell yeah!

#I'm too tired to tag specifics #discourse

26 notes · View notes

marrmora · 6 months ago

Text

————- Qi Rongs #1 supporter & husband —————

-> Pronouns.cc / YouTube / Tag <-

————-> F/O LIST <—————

——--> How many Qi rong photos do I have rn? <———

————— check out my alt @tr-iiiiiiii-ckster ! ————

Hello! We’re the Apartment of Trolls. We are a fictive heavy system with multiple other terms LOL. The body is disabled, queer, mixed, neurodivergent, fictionkin/otherkin and physically alterhuman! It is also sensitive to bright images.

We identify as a guy, and collectively use the pronouns He/him and It/Its. Separate pronouns are written in our pronouns.cc!

We have Audhd, we are mentally and physically unstable, mentally ill/unwell, have very rare hallucinations, and just a lot of stuff in general. We possibly have OLD (obsessive love disorder), NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder), BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder), possibly psychotic and a possible polyfragmented system, but our system terms are in our pronouns cc!! i am EXTREMELY messed up and obsessive, soooo yeah

Despite me having several F/Os, i am eternally bound to my boyfriend/soon to be husband, Qi rong <3 we’re both soulbonded, and I wouldn’t ever replace my sweet lil cannibal man

Our asks are open for anything! A friendly convo, a userbox/divider/moodboard/stimboard asks, or anything else! We will delete any form of hate, though, even if it’s not towards us.

[ although if you want to send an ask for kin/headmate stuff, we prefer if you sent an ask to @ink-casket, our account for that stuff! ]

We do not have a DNI! Only thing that makes us uncomfortable are willogenic systems (past reasons) and Sheith shippers* (ALSO past reasons), but they will not be blocked and they are welcome onto this account! :)

*Sheith shippers won’t be blocked, but understand we may be a little uncomfortable with interactions (Dms n stuff like that) from them !! Only reason i feel uncomfortable is because literally I see myself as keith and shiro is like a straight brother to me, and past shit LOL. All ships that ARENT underage/adult or some weird shit is welcome here :)

—

Our special interests include:

[ * or bold equals we are a huge fan of this, slanted means we are kind of disconnected from it]

Homestuck*

Voltron*

Dandy’s world*

Collecting pencils**

Kandi making

Story writing*

Queer media

Researching disorders/disabilities

Numbers*

AU’s

Science/Biology

The outsiders

Heavens Official Blessing*

—

Stamps by @/Theatrepuppet

Qi rong framed images by @/zroxshy

Qi rong graphics by @/cellarmaiden

#introduction #intro post #pinned intro #introductory post #blog intro #plural #pluralpunk #plural system #plurality #plural community #pluralgang #tw flashing lights #tw flickering #tw flashing colors #Spotify

47 notes · View notes

deadandwalking · 3 months ago

Text

📖The Dark Novella System🌙

hiyaa :D i’m Francis, the host of the Dark Novella system!

here’s some things you should know about me and my system :3

⭐️ We are a monoconscious, mixed origin, dawnium system!

⭐️ We are fictive heavy, with most of our fictives originating from some kind of horror media

⭐️ We form new members a lot and swap quite easy

⭐️ @fictives-and-assorted-fools is our plural blog

⭐️ The body/host (me!) is 16 years old, Trisgender Notgirl, and uses She/He pronouns and feminine terms. I am proudly Irish and suffer from ADHD, BPD, NPD, Depression, Selective Mutism and possibly more :’)!!

⭐️ My best friends rn are Bloodbane&, Cody, Finn, Corv, Ray and Calypso! love you guys <3

⭐️ I go by many names but my main ones aree Francis, Rebecca, Jessica and Nancy, or if you’re a close friend of mine, Frankie :3

⭐️ Fictionkin to Nancy Thompson (A Nightmare on Elm Street) <3

⭐️ I am Fictionhearted/Soulbound to Offenderman and Freddy Krueger :p if you don’t like that then get smited ig

⭐️ Alterhuman :3 i identify WITH, not as, Computer Viruses, Angels, Robots and Dolls. i identify as a zombie and a ghost.

⭐�� My favourite colours are purple, pink, red, and blue !!! :3

💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎

Online family :-

Milky / Brother

Tiresias / Brother

Polites / Brother

Stephen / Brother

Elias / Brother

Gerry / Sister

Calypso / Sister

Lico / Little brother !!

Callum / Little brother <3

Kian / Nephew

Luke / Nephew

Saph / Nephew

Candy / Niece

Michael / Uncle

Rayner / Grandpa

Simon / Grandpa

Hezekiah / Grandpa

💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎💎

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

DNI LIST!

please stay away if you are:

🌟 Terfs, radfems/radqueers, homophobes and transphobes etc

🌟 Anti furry, anti endo, anti otherkin etc

🌟 If you’re gonna hate on my “problematic” alters, begone!

🌟 If you’re attacking paraphilias, leave. it’s a mental illness. as long as they don’t act on it, it’s fine

🌟 On that note, paraphiliacs who act on it. you’re just fuckin gross

🌟 Cop supporters, trump supporters, israel supporters and all that. fuck you.

🌟 Anyone trying to start syscourse. i do not wanna do that.

🌟 People who will put me in The Hole. CALLUM.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Things i like!! :3

💫 Creepypasta!!! i grew up on it and it’s so special to me. especially the Slender brothers :3

💫 Slenderverse too!! EMH and APC/TAG are the best.

💫 Mouthwashing !!!

💫 Indie horror in general. fnaf, batim, ddlc, bbieal, all that stuff :3

💫 Arcane >:D

💫 The Amazing Digital Circus, Don’t Hug Me I’m Scared, and Candle Cove <3

💫 A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET <33333 also Psycho, Halloween, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, The Conjuring, and all horror movies really :3

💫 Rastamouse and Tawog :p

💫 History!!!!! especially World War 1. it’s my pookie.

💫 Cherry Bombs, Salutes, Consumer fireworks

💫 Dolls and Puppets! very awesome :3

💫 My ocs! Danni especially <3 and Buddy he’s my bestie trust

💫 Lia <3

💫 My fps <333333333

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Other blogs of mine

✨ @silcoask-blog (an ask and rp blog for Silco from Arcane!)

✨ @vice-principal-silco (an ask and rp blog for school au Silco)

✨ @ask-offy (an ask and rp blog for Offenderman from Creepypasta - heavily rewritten version)

✨ @responsible-intern (an ask and rp blog for Grey Zare, an oc from Mouthwashing)

✨ @slendersiblings-asks (an ask and rp blog for the Slender brothers (and Melody))

✨ @angels-game (an ask and rp blog for Angel, a creepypasta oc heavily inspired by APCollection

✨ @the-og-i-lived-bitch-duo (an ask and rp blog for Nancy Thompson and Freddy Krueger)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

15 notes · View notes

kaiserposting · 11 months ago

Note

ngl still being a kaiser fan after 261 is lame

Omg this ask got me so tight when I got to it I had to hop on mylaptop to type my essay

Ok this is a little Personal and some of yall aren gonna fuck with me after this but it's ok . Kaiser is a character I identify with because he's a good portrayal of someone with NPD so WE WILL GET INTO IT!

So like that being said. What do you mean 'Still liking Kaiser after the leaks is lame' like genuinely what do you mean. I just woke up but are you guys like SURPRISED by this. I liked him when he was introduced and this is what he was acting like. There have been A HUNDRED more chapters of him acting the same way past introduction. And now he's still acting like it. I understand if you just hate him right off the bat that makes sense but this doesn't really. Even if you're one of those people who just liked him for the backstory reveal because you have a I Can Treat You Better hero complex re:abuse victims that behavior WAS shown EVEN IN 260. "I hit the ball but it doesn't hit back" - the author has a very specific way of writing and this was VERY much intentional

Also like I understand there might be an initial shock when reading such words. Like it's Unpleasant it's Ugly. But also it boils down to a State of mind which personally I've observed as common among victims of severe trauma. "These people are born 'humans'. Different from me, they were born 'wanted humans'." = I hate people who weren't hurt the same way I was because I am jealous and bitter, I'm so jealous and bitter it feels good to me to make others feel like shit. And I'm not trying to get on some Hurt People Hurt People bullshit because that shit is annoying and apologia but what I'm trying to say is that sometimes Trauma makes you unpleasant and ugly and erratic and I appreciate that Kaneshiro actually wrote it out. Also like that feeling by itself isn't inherently evil. I think it's a very natural response! In this case Kaiser goes too far not by experiencing this emotion but by acting on it.

So now with THAT out of the way too, I think we need to sit down and think more into the Ness situation. So first he says, "I can't accept kindness because all I know is malice. If anything I think malice makes life easier." Then he goes to say he is specifically looking for someone to make a "dog to his malice" and reads a psychology book to achieve that. Like first of all I'm sorry but that is so comically evil it's hilarious to me. He read a textbook to be a more efficient male manipulator. But anyway the way I understand that isn't a deep underlying evil within him but a need for control. I think he believes everyone will hurt and disorient him unless he feels like he's Controlling them. From an abusive household the only relationship dynamic he knows is person of authority - inferior party. His only friend is Ness and the only person he feels safe around being Ness is because of he tells himself Ness is his "dog" and therefore won't ever raise a hand to him. And that's because he thinks anyone who isn't his dog/under his control will do exactly that.

And so... If we go from there, from the parallel we understand Kaiser didn't see his meeting with Ness the same way Ness sees it. However, that doesn't mean Kaiser's view is the objective truth. I think they're both UNRELIABLE and EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE. So what that means is that Ness sees his time together with Kaiser through a more glorified lens, while Kaiser denies himself thinking of Ness as a companion because that puts him in a vulnerable spot, so to maintain his feeling of being in control he exerts distance and tells himself Heh we aren't actually friends because he doesn't even know that one time I giggled at him in the showers I was actually just manipulating him all along because I am sooo evil and untouchable 😏. Like do we actually take this perception at face value here because to me it just seems like a Scared and Cowardly person trying to act out his idea of a strong person because the ONLY other time he's been in any meaningful proximity to someone he got beat up and degraded.

With that I also think Kaiser is very much narcissist posturing. He'slying to himself to make himself seem invulnerable and self-aggrandizing himself through his malice (I think pretending we are 100% evil and irredeemable makes a lot of us feel safe because it seems inhuman and people are easily hurt so you don't Ever want to be a multidimensional person with layered personality traits). Because like if you think about it without the emotional reaction of "I hope Ness kills you you stupid whore" that we all have... He actually isn't doing anything that big. Like in his head he's like Heh I'm soooo Patrick Bateman I have all the control 😏 but all he did was like find a guy to play football with.

Like he's trying to say to himself that he's all that. Sure he does insult Ness and that's not good! But he didn't pull off some Complicated deeply horrific scheme. I do not believe Kaiser has an objective view of himself. It really takes away the power from all of that when you realize what he's doing is just Very Pathetic and Paranoid and Intimacy Averse. "I can't have normal friends let me get this guy in on my master servant roleplay and I'll act like he's not enjoying it too because it'll make me feel more powerful" Men will do anything but go to counseling

Addendum: This is also not Kaiser. Now I don't know what kind of person Kaiser is but considering I read it as him suffering from NPD/a disordered personality that means he doesn't have a "real" identity most of the time, this is a shell we're seeing. He just has a mask maybe there's something underneath maybe there isn't and he's empty inside, but the point is he is the kind of character who has a specific way they want to portray themselves and will lie to both themselves and the audience to achieve it. Yes I believe that includes the I'm a male manipulator evilest person alive 😏 shtick too (I think the actual truth is probably somewhere in the middle of his and Ness's view. Most likely they're both incorrect).

Notice how Barou and Rin overcame things? That is because they have a real ego. Kaiser doesn't have a "real ego"/sense of self right now, all he has is his selfish act. I believe that is intentional because I think the Blue Lock mangaka shows a good grasp and understanding of psychology. The development is pointing towards him actually getting one during this match we'll see. Hey he might even change and grow as a person if that happens but I wouldn't get too overly optimistic!

Also we need to understand that we only see these people playing football we don't know what the fuck he's like outside of that. I currently don't have any reason to believe he's anything beyond rude and insufferable when like talking to people who aren't his football rivals and in Blue Lock on principle I believe everyone is at least 30% a better more bearable person off the field.

And to finish off my demented rant some of yall are fucking HYPOCRITICAL. So when Isagi takes joy in ruining people's dreams it's fine but when Kaiser does it he needs to kill himself? Let's be very serious.

TL;DR Kaiser's behavior makes total sense, his 261 characterization falls in line with everything we've seen of him before so there's no need for shock, and he looked good being dysfunctional and messed up too

#Not me writing a dissertation

38 notes · View notes