thenarcdiaries - Tumblr blog

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when I display the npd traits and it’s not just being quirky and relatable and actually involves like demeaning others, making excuses for myself, being grandiose and being generally insufferable and then I realise what I’ve done to my image

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who up hating pop psychology

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Me, a person with BPD: is it my turn to FINALLY get better??

My Life: No <3

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Just watched a TikTok saying that we people with NPD are all Sadist.

Wrong! I don’t enjoy ruining everyone life.

Just the ones who deserve it

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everything’s wrong with me. unless someone else is saying “what the hell is wrong with you?” then there is nothing wrong with me and i am god’s favorite little lamb or something

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I fake being empahtic soo perfectly that, not only every person in our life describe us as the “most highly empathic person I ever met”

But last night we told the host’s partner that we actually don’t feel empathy. They didn’t believe us lmao. Our oscar when? 🧍🏻

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people who are good and kind and uplifting and say and do nice things for other people, solely for the purpose of gaining attention or upholding your reputation, i love you, and you still are good people.

i don't care if you're seething with anger or jealousy or hatred inside whilst you do the nice things. you're still a good person. i don't care if you're constantly criticising the other person in your head whilst you do nice things. you're still a good person. i don't care if the entire time you help someone or say something nice you're constantly thinking about yourself or how much you want them to say something nice back or only doing the good thing to get praise or for your own sense of achievement. you're still a good person. i don't care if you're messy or find it extremely hard to do nice things for others and in general. you're. still. a. good. person.

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disabled people are allowed to be slutty . it’s not kink or special or unique for disabled people to have sexualities

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"Pride month is over"

WRONG! Your pride month is over! Me and all the other disabled queers are having pride month two: disability edition

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i got to thinking about something i said... going to turn these into prints, stickers, shirts, buttons, etc. soon. thought folks might like this, i'm way more pleased with the design than i thought i would be (: consider adding more flags too!

happy pride to everyone who refuses to be cisgender (or cissexual!) in the face of a world that demands we bow to their needs. we do not owe anyone cisgenderism or cissexuality- we owe it to ourselves to be who we are instead.

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made npd stamp

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Another bit of personal experience with NPD: de-intensifying thoughts.

You're probably going to have more luck with this in professional psychiatric setting because this entire process works better in guided and controlled environment, but it isn't necessary. Personally, I have a good amount of self-control and that helps. It might not work for you, just keep in mind there are other methods out there.

The idea is in diminishing intensity of emotions, thoughts, and conclusions once you notice that you're hit by a strong feeling or conviction:

"Everyone loves me" -> "There are people who love me and there are people who don't love me. There's also a great chunk of people who don't know me and it's illogical to expect them to like me without meeting/knowing me."

"Everyone hates me" -> "There are people who dislike me, but there are also people who cherish and love me. I am not worthless just because someone dislikes me."

"I failed at XYZ, which means I can't ever do anything right" -> "Failure is part of the process. The greatest minds of our generation had mistakes, bad days, poorly accepted art, etc. I am not talentless just because of one mistake."

"I haven't gotten supply in a while, I have to leave" -> "They might not know that I need attention as I didn't make it explicit. I can initiate spending time together or directly tell them I need to hear XYZ. I am not being fair."

"X disagrees with me, meaning their opinion is worthless" -> "They might disagree with me, but it doesn't mean they have no worth. If anything, someone willing to healthily debate with me is a person worthy of respect".

"Only MY opinion matters" -> "Actually, it will be really embarrassing if I end up being wrong. Very few opinions are worth dying on that hill. Keeping middle ground and establishing reasons why I lean towards X and not Y might be the best option".

"I have shown vulnerability, which means they see me as weak" -> "Most people do not consider vulnerabilty a weakness. In fact, me showing my true emotions most likely made them proud of me. I do not have to continue opening up if I'm uncomfortable, but it isn't a mistake that I did".

And so on. The hardest part is going to be to catch the emotion when it comes over. I don't have advice on how to become more mindful aside from actively paying attention to how you feel over the course of the day/week/month, etc. Maybe journal or create mind maps for your feelings. Whatever works for you, really.

This is loosely based around the general logic behind transference focused psychotherapy, which is something that can be used for treating NPD, as I recently learned. I am not a psychiatrist and my therapy is self-applied. With that being said, do your homework and don't trust me blindly.

P.S. Yet again, this is not universal advice so use your brain.

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bitches will literally starve themselves just so that their body can experience the same level of pain as their mind, and they can achieve true balance

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Queer 👏 people 👏 are 👏 not 👏 all 👏 fucking 👏 activists 👏

Stop quizzing us on queer history and asking us questions we aren’t qualified to answer about the world and about politics and about our identities

Stop trying to back us into a corner so you can justify your discrimination on the basis that we don’t know what we’re talking about or can’t “defend” ourselves to you

Stop treating every queer person that stands up and says “I want to be treated like a person” as if they’re an activist

Cut that bullshit out

Marginalised people just want to exist and be happy

I don’t know everything, and that doesn’t make me undeserving of your respect or my human rights you fucker

I don’t even owe you the stuff I do know- I still am entitled to basic fucking respect

TLDR; Queer people shouldn’t have to be historians or scientists for you to not be a fucking dick

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Hey, asker here since I wanted to find someone with actual NPD for accurate writing and stuff

These questions are probably ableist so I apologize in advance, can a knight templar be a narcissist? (Aka the trope of an antagonist who thinks that what they're doing is right even when the actions are awful ((Shit, as well is it ableist to write a villain who has NPD, I'm trying to not imply their disability is the reason or excuse for what they're doing but I can't tell if it's inherently ableist))

Can narcissists be decent parents? (Likely obvious but I don't know)

hi, thank you for asking in good faith first of all, ill try to be super polite about how i answer!!

for your first question, i mean technically anyone can be a narcissist, so its not out of the question in the logical sense. however, narcissists are often painted in a very negative light, and having only antagonisit characters existing with npd has really contrubted to that problem.

of course your character can have that lack of understanding that hes a badguy without having NPD. lots of bad people think theyre doing the right thing while being neurotypical, or just not being a narcissist! id say its best to avoid to help detract from the stigma.

however, thats not to say it cant be done. it is valid to show antagonists of all kinds, and if every antagonist wasnt part of any minority we could see how that would be infantilizing, right?

so id say, if youre super married to the idea of representing narcissism with this antagonist, have a protagonist with npd too. its not impossible to have two characters with the same disability! show that its not his disorder that makes him bad, have a good guy narcissist!!

having npd can totally make it hard to tell when youre in the wrong, but it wont say, take your moral code away? if that makes sense?

and for the last question, yes, narcissists can be good parents!! there are parts of our condition that we have to learn to work with that can make parenting a particular challenge, but pwNPD are totally capable of being awesome parents

again, thank you for genuinely asking!! i hope this helps!! im totally happy to answer more questions, and i open the notes to other pwNPD to chime in!

have a good day!