#I am a Satanist

[tiresias-the-prophet]

Wyv meeting Kurt: So you're a Christian?

Kurt: Catholic but Ja why?

Wyv: oh no reason my dad is Christian

Kurt: are you Christian or Catholic?

Wyv: HAHAHAH no I'm a Paganistic Satanist

Kurt: oh.. nice

[j0celynh0rr0r]

[gara-meila-nox-satanic-witch777]

Give yourself to Satan, no one will judge you! Give your Soul to Satan!

[antikristvs]

Since I'm sharing belated pictures, here's one from my Vėlinės/Samhain altar 🖤

[daytaker]

i have come back with more questionable mc behaviours as a treat

mc who’s a LeVeyan satanist, that or another idea of a similar variety which is when mc gets teleported they were wearing a “hail satan” shirt

also i loved the creepy scientist like mc (๑>◡<๑) - clown anon

Clown Anon MCs - [ Clowncore MC | Death-Fixated Science Geek MC | LeVeyan Satanist MC ]

I want to own a Sheep MC plush that wears a Hail Satan shirt. I want that to be among my possessions when I die.

That out of the way...

(cw: references to drug use, references to sex, this is the church of satan. sex drugs and rock n roll. this gets extremely silly towards the end.)

Satanists Don't Believe in Satan

You were vibing to Eurythmics, sitting cross-legged in your bedroom and trying to meditate while your Snake, Dr. Faust, wound his way around your arm. And then, suddenly, you weren't. The shag carpet was replaced by a hard wood floor, and the warmth of your bedroom was replaced by the cool draft of a large assembly hall with windows. And some punks in military academy uniforms were scowling at you.

"What the fuck? What gives?" You were really confused. Did you already hit the acid and you're so high you forgot? You stood up and looked down at yourself. You were still wearing your CoS shirt and pink pajama shorts, and you still had on your fluffy slippers.

"Welcome, uhhh...." A big guy in red squinted at a piece of paper, then looked at me. "Is your name actually Omen LeVey?"

"That's what it says on my driver's license, bitch." Dr. Faust wound his way up your arm and into your shirt. He clearly didn't appreciate the change in temperature either.

"It's not too late to swap them for someone else, is it?" whispered a dark haired man to Big Red.

Big Red ignored him. "Welcome, Omen, to the Devildom! I'm sure you're very confused, but everything will make sense soon. You have been chosen to participate in an exchange--"

"Where do you think you're going?" The dark haired bitch cut off Big Red as I walked to the door.

I turned around. "Uh, out?"

"Out where, exactly?" asked the bitchy one.

"Out of here? I'm not sitting around waiting for you to go through some sort of timeshare presentation with me. However I got here, I'm sure I'm high as fuck, and I'm not going to spend my time high as fuck getting talked at by this dude. No offense, Red."

Ten minutes later, you were tied to a chair in the middle of the assembly hall. Big Red, the bitch, and three other guys stood around you, unsure what to do.

"Is this, like, an ex of yours or something, Satan?" one of the extras asked another. They were both twinks, and they were also both quiet up to this point, so you couldn't really think of how to differentiate them on the fly.

"No? What are you talking about?"

"Their shirt!"

All five guys stared at your graphic tee, which was black with white splatter text that read:

"CHURCH OF SATAN "DO WHAT THOU WILT SHALL BE THE WHOLE OF THE LAW" - SATAN PROBABLY"

"I can't believe Satan has an entire church dedicated to him! I wonder if there are churches to me," Twink 1 said with a sigh.

"That's not a church dedicated to me," replied Twink 2. "Their entire doctrine is a repudiation of my very existence. You should educate yourself, Asmodeus."

"Helloooo? Excuse me?" You wobbled in your seat, trying to get their attention. "Since I don't have any choice but to listen, I'll allow you to go ahead and tell me what the fuck is going on."

Big Red sighed at began to explain again. "You've arrived here in the Devildom as an exchange student from the human world. For the next year, you will be living here in the Devildom with us demons, attending the Royal Academy of Diavolo, or "RAD", we we tend to call it."

"...Okay, so clearly this is a bad trip, so I'm gonna politely ask if we can skip to the part where I'm finished having sex with my downstairs neighbors and I turn into a ball of energy? Like. C'mon. Chop chop."

"I am Diavolo, acting lord of the Devildom. And this is Lucifer, my right-hand demon and confidant." He gestured to the bitchy one.

"Charmed," you said in a voice saturated with sarcasm. "What about those three?"

"Ah," Diavolo said, nodding. "Those are Asmodeus, Satan, and Beelzebub. They are Lucifer's brothers."

"This is so wild. So Satan and Lucifer aren't the same dude?"

"Careful what you say," said Twink 1--or Asmodeus, as you now knew him to be. "You'll make Satan angry!"

"Sorry bro. Look look look, though, I'm in your fan club." You hope your shirt with Satan's name on it will butter that one up--Satan is Twink 2, as it turns out; a skinny blonde kid with a yellow bow tie. You aren't sure how to feel about that, exactly. You'd always pictured him as a cartoon goat-man, more or less.

"Do you really think you can butter me up by claiming that the Church of Satan is my fan club?" He scowled at you, looking indignant. "Didn't you hear me earlier? I'm aware of what your so-called 'church' teaches, and while I'm not opposed to the ideology in a broad sense, I can't support a group that considers my very existence to be a joke."

"Hey, hey, it's not a joke," you said soothingly. "You're just the theological equivalent to the Queen of Engand. Powerless, probably fake, definitely dead, but you look good on merchandise."

"Do you want to die?"

"Sometimes."

"Omen, you will be living with these four and two of their brothers for the next year." Diavolo smiled at you, apparently choosing to ignore every word you've spoken.

All four of the brothers looked crestfallen.

"Oh, yeah, I feel real fuckin' welcome. Roll out the wagon, why don't ya?"

"Is your name actually Omen LeVey?" asked Big Red again in a murmur, looking at his sheet with as mystified an expression as ever.

Dr. Faust, still coiled around your arm, peeked out at the world again and flicked his tongue. Asmodeus screamed, and Lucifer pointed at you and demanded, "Diavolo, swap it for a different one!"

---

Epilogue.

Eight months later, you and Satan marry. Dr. Faust officiates. Together, you have three children, all of whom refuse to acknowledge their fathers' objective existence.

[lupinedreaming]

So, according to the screenshots I’ve seen from the Escape the Ministry game, it seems that the theory that Terzo was removed for not following the Ministry’s Plan was correct. I’ve seen some fans say that this was due to him focusing more on the individual and the people than on Satan.

If that is so, I find that very interesting because IRL Satanism, at least the non-theistic variety, is very much focused on the individual.

For instance, let’s look at the first two pillars of The Global Order of Satanism (a non-theistic Satanist collective):

“

Self-fulfilment and personal understanding allow us to support ourselves and therefore others.

Respect the inviolable body, autonomous will, and sovereign right of every individual to guide their own life and being; remembering that enjoyment of these rights is predicated on respect for the same in others.”

Very much focused on the personal and individual, albeit in a compassionate and non-selfish way.

Additionally, Satan is typically used in non-theistic Satanism as a symbol for knowledge and rebelling against systems that want you to just obey and fall in line.

From this perspective, by focusing more on the individual and going against the plan of his institution, Terzo was practicing Satanism arguably more “correctly” (or at least more healthily) than the Ministry was, and he was killed for it.

[iamroyalgayness]

Look, I usually don't get serious on this app, but after the election yesterday, I feel just devastated. I am a trans disabled queer satanist, with him winning I don't feel safe.

I'm not trying to play this up for laughs, I am being serious. I don't feel safe. I don't want to feel like this, but with project 2025, I am terrified, and I don't know where else to post this. How could this happen? I don't want to be afraid I don't want to be contemplating what the hell am I going to do... I don't want to be in this country.

Are we going to have to move? We can't afford to! I can't move! We can't move! My mom works 2 jobs! My twin is in college! I'm about to be in college! I live in Michigan! When I was younger, it was relatively progressive! Now it's getting more conservative, and I'm scared! Am I going to have to get my tubes tied? I was never planning on having kids, but if abortions became basically impossible to get or even outright illegal, I don't want to be forced to give birth! What if something horrible happens?! I don't want to die! These bans have already killed!

[keyboard-clicks]

Rite Here, Rite Now premiers on June 20th which is the summer solstice/summer equinox, the longest day of the year. To many Satanists, an equinox is a time representative of the ending of an old era and the beginning of a new one.

Do with that information what you will.

[gnomeskillet]

Scrolling through @couldurfaveescapeaperturescience and-

[valezy]

let's see how many Ghost fans are here

[j0celynh0rr0r]

Say it.

[gara-meila-nox-satanic-witch777]

BLASPHEMY!

Blasphemy, is in my opinion, one of the Purest ways of Honoring our Lord Satan! It says in the Bble, “Mark 3: 28-30. 28:Verily I say unto you (this is Jesus speaking),All sins shall be forgiven unto the sons of men, and blasphemies wherewith soever they shall blaspheme. 29:But he that shall blaspheme (still Jesus speaking) against the Holy Ghost hath never forgiveness, but is in danger of Eternal Damnation: 30: (Mark speaking) because they said, he hath an unclean spirit.” It says virtually the same thing in Matthew. So with that in mind let me say, that God is  unclean, and by extension Christ and the Holy Spirit ARE. UNCLEAN.! Here is the reason I say The Holy Trinity is unclean. If a person knows that a crime is being committed, and does nothing about it, then they are complicit in that crime. If God is all seeing, all knowing, all powerful, then HE is complicit in ALL of the child sexual abuse committed BY HIS VERY PRIESTS!!! But not just them, but EVERY CRIME committed on innocent Children the world over! SO, I will say this with ALL THE HATE AND ANGER AND VITRIOL I CAN MUSTER, “Fuck God, Fuck Christ, and Fuck the Holy Spirit! God IS unclean. Christ IS unclean! And the Holy Fucking Spirit IS  unclean! I say this AND BELIEVE this with EVERY. CELL. IN. MY. BODY.!!! Hail, Lord God Satan!

[bittersweetblasphemy]

UM SO I WAS CHECKING OUT RALPH INESON'S IMDB PAGE for no particular reason AND????

EXCUSE?????

[selfidentifiednerdyprude]

Wow. Uncommon LaVey W

[beastsovrevelation]

I've decided that Ava Silva

despises Spongebob.

Why?

For the plot of her villain annoys heroine until she falls in love with him, of course.