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morning-star-joy · 1 year ago

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a stranger's heart without a home epilogue

Pairing: Joel x F!Reader, Post-Outbreak

Chapter Summary: Now that you've found a place by Joel's side, you know you'll never leave.

Chapter Warnings/Tags: Smut (18+ Only MDNI) unprotected p in v sex, praise kink. Language (y'all know it by now), so much Fluff

A/N: We will return to this story with one-shots, drabbles, sequels, prequels, AUs, and whatever else I can think up, because I love these characters sm and I don't think I can ever let them go completely. But I hope that you guys enjoyed this story as much as I enjoyed writing it. All my love sent to every one of you!

Wordcount: 3k

chapter 1 || chapter 19 || chapter 20 || masterlist

ao3 link

Waking up without being wrapped up in Joel’s warmth was not a feeling you were fond of.

So when your eyes slowly blinked open one morning, the bed empty beside you, a deep frown crossed your face as you were immediately thrown into a bad mood.

You grumbled to yourself, turning over to try and get some more sleep, even though you knew it was a hopeless cause when you were alone.

With a sigh, you pushed yourself up, glaring at his unoccupied side of the bed before slowly getting out of bed.

Despite your grumpy, early morning annoyance, you moved about his bedroom subconsciously, stooping down to pick up your panties that had landed across the room last night to pull them on before grabbing his flannel next.

Walking towards the hallway as you buttoned the shirt up, you paused in the doorway, head lifting as you sniffed at the air again when a peculiar scent caught your attention.

Was that…?

That frown that had been fixed on your face since you woke up quickly evaporated, melting into a small smile as you made your way towards the staircase, taking the steps two at a time before swinging around and heading towards where that delicious smell was coming from.

You didn’t try and sneak around Joel, but your footsteps were light by nature, and he had no idea you had found your way into the edge of the room as he turned over whatever was sizzling in the pan on the stove—though you had a pretty good idea just what it was from the smell.

Unable to help yourself, you loitered in the doorway, leaning against it with arms crossed, head resting against the edge as you watched him make you breakfast with a warm smile on your face.

When he turned to grab something off the counter, he finally saw you, jumping with a mumbled curse, and you couldn’t help but laugh softly to yourself at the sight of such a prepared man being taken aback.

Joel’s eyes darted across your face and down your body, a small smirk twitching onto his lips at the sight of his flannel barely reaching past your thighs as he murmured, “Morning, darlin’.”

“Good morning,” you hummed in response, pushing yourself off the doorframe to walk towards him, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him into a slow, sweet kiss before the sound of popping from the pan made him tear himself away from you.

You glanced towards the pan, seeing that your theory had been correct, but you still found yourself asking with a growing smile, “Is that bacon?”

“Yup,” Joel replied, stealing a glance at you as he was in the midst of turning the strips of thin, crispy meat over again, checking that they were fully cooked before removing the pan from the heat. “Gift from Tommy.”

“How kind of him,” you teased, reaching for one of the pieces of bacon before Joel playfully swatted your hand away.

“Table,” he insisted, nodding towards the small table next to the window where he insisted you ate your meals together, and you sighed dramatically, even as you were helpless to resist his endearing Southern manners while you walked towards it.

Plopping yourself down in a seat, you rested your chin on your hand, content to watch the domestic scene of him setting the bacon on three plates along with the eggs he had apparently also scrambled, before bringing two of the plates towards you.

You knew the last plate was to be saved for Ellie, and you smiled at the simple show of his affection for his surrogate daughter, before turning your attention towards your food.

The two of you ate in comfortable silence, not needing to fill the air between you with any unnecessary words, the same way it had always been between you, even before…this.

It was funny, how once you had allowed yourself to start falling, you couldn’t stop.

Most of your days were spent in Joel’s home now instead of your own. It wasn’t an adjustment either of you commented on, as most things went unspoken between you—but you had caught Joel’s smile when you brought your sister’s childhood drawing over to rest on the fireplace mantle next to Ellie’s drawing of Joel.

With your clothes in his closet and the old photograph that you had caught him observing set up next to his pictures with his daughters on his dresser—“your parents?” he had asked one day, and you nodded, letting him take in the picture without forcing you to speak on the matter until you were ready—you settled right into your place by his side, knowing for certain that now you had found your spot there, you would never leave.

When Ellie burst through the back door, saying something about smelling bacon until she froze in the doorway at the sight of you sitting at Joel’s table, in his flannel, sharing his breakfast with him, the young girl burst into laughter as your cheeks flushed, and Joel groaned.

“Ellie—”

“I knew it!” Ellie cackled, pointing between you with a gleeful glint in her eye. “We all fucking knew it!”

Joel rolled his eyes, glancing at you to make sure you were okay, but you were smiling yourself now, trying to obscure a giggle with a cough as he shook his head and rose to grab the third plate of breakfast.

It didn’t take much coaxing for Ellie to join you at the small table then once Joel brought over another chair, and you glanced between the two with a grin as Ellie refused to let Joel eat in peace, teasing him over your presence at every single opportunity, and drawing a laugh from you every time she did so.

Joel just shook his head, letting out sighs every time Ellie would rib him about it, but you saw the warmth in the smile he tried to conceal behind each bite as he looked between the two of you, sitting together with him in his home.

When Ellie left to meet up with Dina and Jesse for some regularly scheduled mayhem for the day, you barely began to clean the dishes before Joel’s hands were on you, sliding up your thighs and under the flannel while he tugged you back into him.

“Joel—”

He interrupted your half-hearted protests with his lips pressed to yours, drawing moans from your mouth as he turned and lifted you easily, setting you on the edge of the counter to take you while you still wore his shirt.

Somewhere in the back of your mind, you remembered the first time you had found yourselves like this—pressed against the counter in your kitchen, your back to him as he fucked into you until you both found much-needed release, no matter how short, how temporary.

Now he held you tightly to him, rolling his hips into you at a leisurely pace, facing you fully with his lips pressed to yours again and again, taking all the time in the world with you.

Because that was what you had.

All the time in the world.

When you were finished, it didn’t last for long, only taking the time to clean up the mess you had made before you were scooped up into his arms, your bright laughter echoing through the house as he carried you up the stairs to have you again in his bed.

You would never get tired of being with him like this, and you knew he felt the same just from the words he murmured every time he was inside of you—murmurs of “fuck, sweetheart, so perfect, so good for me” and whimpers of “oh, mi luna, always want you, always.”

That late morning, when you were spent in his arms, cheek pressed against his chest to listen to his heartbeat slow back down to a calming pace, you found yourself saying quietly, “Hey, Joel?”

“Hm?” he hummed, fingers dragging up and down your spine in a lazy, affectionate manner, and you smiled against his skin before pulling yourself up so you could share his pillow with him.

“I’m gonna ask you something, just—” you cut yourself off, sighing as you felt your cheeks heat, avoiding his searching, curious gaze before you mumbled, “Just don’t laugh.”

“Mm,” he hummed again, arching an eyebrow as you looked back at him, and you smacked him in the chest as he teased, “No promises.”

“Fuck you,” you snapped, the harsh words devoid of any bite and instead filled with a fond warmth, and he chuckled, the sound softening you as you gazed into his eyes and asked, “Do you believe in other lives?”

Joel’s brow furrowed, clearly wondering what had brought this on as he looked over your face, but to his credit, he didn’t judge your line of thought as he replied truthfully, “I dunno, I’ve never really thought about it. Why?”

With a sigh, you traced the lines of his face with the tips of your fingers, grazing them over the scar near his temple as you answered, “I just…”

You shrugged, trying to avoid his gaze again as you suddenly felt self-conscious, stupid at the soft sentiment that you had been mulling over the past few nights.

But Joel was having none of that.

“Look at me.”

Even though the gentle, firm command made you blink in surprise, you followed it instantly, almost subconsciously as your gaze flickered up to meet his.

Joel searched your eyes, probably trying to find the reason for this unexpected question, and you distracted yourself from his quick calculation by glancing down his own body when he shifted himself to face you better.

Between his legs, you could see his cock was stirring again just from having you this close to him, half-hard and Jesus, even though he had just fucked you so well—twice—you still wanted him. You were sore and aching, blissed out from far more than one orgasm and you still wanted him.

Would you ever stop wanting him?

Biting your lip, you began to wonder if you could convince him to partake in a third round, and then maybe then you could bring it up, pour your soul out to him as you rode his dick that you watched twitch under your rapt attention.

Knowing that just the simplicity of your eyes on him evoked such a response from him, your desire for him eliciting his own desire for you, made your heart begin to race again, and, fuck, now you just wanted to—

Your name being muttered pulled your attention back as you began to fully space out, and you blinked a few times, looking up as Joel gently pushed you back onto the bed to hover over you.

His thumb brushed along the scar on your cheek, a story you had yet to tell him, just as he had yet to tell you the story of the one on his temple. You knew you would speak of each hidden part of your lives eventually, but you were in no rush, content in how you already knew him as well as you knew yourself.

“Look at me,” he murmured again, and you did.

Joel’s thumb moved to stroke along your chin and up the edge of your jaw, and your eyelashes fluttered, helpless to resist his request as he whispered, “Tell me.”

Licking your lips, you finally found the courage in his comforting warmth to say, “Do you think we found each other?”

Joel’s brow furrowed, still not following your line of thought, and you sighed quietly, heart racing in your chest as you clarified, “In another life.”

At the clarification, Joel’s face softened, his hand reaching back up to cup your cheek as his eyes locked with yours.

Open, honest, real, and you knew that if you did meet him in any other lives, you were without a doubt fated to helplessly fall for him all over again.

“Do you think we found each other in another life?” you asked quietly, breath trembling as you danced your fingers over his face, cupping his cheek in the same way he still held yours. “Where nothing bad ever happened to us?”

Joel’s lips were already pressed to yours, desperately kissing you as you finished the question, and you sighed into the affectionate action, knowing his answer even before he parted from you to speak.

“I hope so,” he whispered, bumping his nose against yours as he stole another kiss before laying back down to face you on his side again. “Sarah would have loved you.”

The genuine comment brought a surprised laugh from you, the sound nothing but fond as you smiled at him. “And my Little Star would have loved you.”

Joel returned your smile, wrapping his arms around your waist to pull you closer, his forehead resting against yours before he asked, “What would this life have looked like?”

You hummed in thought, resting your cheek against the pillow to glance over his face, the open, earnest affection in his deep brown gaze, considering the question before answering, “I go to school for photography, and my sister and I move in next door to you.”

“Interesting,” Joel said slowly, his brow arching as he smiled slowly at the scenario you were setting up. “Go on.”

“Well, you are absolutely smitten with me at first sight, of course,” you teased, heart racing as the word smitten left your lips, the description much closer to the feelings you shared for each other, but never dared to speak of directly, even now.

To his credit, Joel didn’t hesitate, his eyes filled with warmth that was only for you as he murmured without missing a beat, “Of course.”

Butterflies were taking flight in your stomach to fill your entire being, and you suddenly felt like you were in something as close to heaven as you could get, unable to help but grin as you continued, “My sister and Sarah become best friends. Tommy’s there too, of course—he comes over for dinner every Friday.”

“Damn, can’t get rid of him even in our fantasy,” Joel teased, and you smacked his shoulder, earning a deep chuckle from him that made your heart skip a beat.

“Every Saturday, we have our movie night, with all five of us,” you continued, speaking slowly, as if you didn’t want this fantasy to come to an end as you imagined it in the comfort of your shared bed with Joel. “With my feet in your lap, and you and Tommy complain about the acting while the girls laugh and tell you both to shut up.”

Joel’s smile was still on his face, but it softened even more into something you didn’t recognize, a look you had seen from him on occasion, one that made your heart race as you struggled to find the next words, “And on Sundays, we spend the mornings in bed, like this. You fuck me, and I kiss you, and you say—”

“I love you.”

Your heart stopped.

You looked at Joel, seeing his entire soul laid bare to you as he placed his heart into your hands without a second thought.

And then your heart started again, pounding against your chest as you licked your lips and whispered the truth you had known, deep down in your soul, for a long time, “I love you, too.”

Joel’s smile then could be described as almost giddy, his kisses nearly joyous as he pressed them to your lips and all over your face, and you laughed, wrapping your arms around him, limbs entangling as you rolled around in your bed and kissed and kissed until you both lost your breath.

When you settled again, foreheads pressed together as you tried to catch your breath, you asked quietly, “When did you know?”

Joel tucked a hair behind your ear, shrugging a shoulder as he answered, “I don’t know. I think I knew for a while, in some way.”

You hummed, giving your agreement to the sentiment in the sound as you gazed at each other, no more barriers left between you as he added softly, “I think that, when I met you—I could tell.”

Propping yourself up on your elbow, you raised an eyebrow as you asked, “Really?”

“Well,” he licked his lips, shifting onto his back to gaze up at you, his hand caressing your back as he explained, “Not love, but—there was some part of you that felt like a part of me.”

You softened then, tears nearly springing to your eyes as you knew exactly what he meant. It was a feeling you had experienced too, for a longer time than you think you even knew. Joel had always been a kindred spirit to you, not only in being a cold cynic, but in the loneliness deep inside his heart. For so long, you had no place to call home, and he was exactly the same.

And now he was your home, as you were his.

“Is that why you created those stupid fucking rules?” you asked, the comment eliciting a laugh out of him that you joined in with. “To keep me away?”

Joel’s thumb stroked along the small of your back, surprising you as he nodded. “Yeah, it was.”

You were struck silent for a moment, feeling an old ache in your chest that was only satisfied when you leaned down to kiss him again. “Well, you did a great job at keeping them.”

“Mm,” he hummed in content into your mouth, chasing your lips for another longer, deeper kiss when you pulled away. “I’m glad I didn’t.”

“Yeah,” you murmured, kissing him again before you laid on top of him, resting your head back onto his chest. “Me too.”

After a long moment of silence that was filled with nothing but an understanding for each other that rested in your souls, you spoke again.

“So it’s settled, then,” you said, raising your head back up to look down into his eyes. “You’ll find me in the next one.”

Joel smiled up at you, cupping your cheek as he pulled you down into a long, lingering kiss that told you everything you needed to know.

Still, he said it aloud, and you finally found peace with the four simple words.

“I’ll always find you.”

#joel miller x reader #joel x f!reader #joel x reader #joel miller series #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fluff #joel miller smut #joel x reader smut #a stranger's heart series #posting this through tears as I listen to we're in love by boygenius on my vinyl which heavily influenced the epilogue

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