#HAVE A GOOD TIME HAPPY HALLOWEEN | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

bravevulnerability · 1 year ago

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say don't go

A/N: Post 4x06, Demons, AU. Picks up from exactly where the episode ends.

"The waiting is a sadness Fading into madness It won't stop... I'm holding out hope for you to say 'don't go' I would stay forever if you say 'don't go'"

'Say Don't Go' - Taylor Swift

Castle remains on the sofa long after Alexis shuffles sleepily off to bed. He thinks he did a sufficient job of taking her mind off of her complicated relationship with Ashley, but now that he sits alone, in the dark, with Ghostbusters playing on the television for the third time this week, his mind wanders to his own. Is his relationship with Beckett just as doomed as he feels his daughter's may be? He and Kate may not be long distance the way Alexis and Ashley are, but there are times when it certainly feels that way.

Sometimes his overthinking leads to the bad habit of drinking. He only means to blunt his thoughts of her with a shot glass of bourbon, some scotch, but then he's sleepy yet wide awake at the same time and drifting out the door on impulse and lost inhibition alone.

Anything is possible, he told Alexis, even the seemingly impossible. But he doesn't want Kate Beckett to be an impossible feat. He just wants her to be his partner, his best friend, and someday, more. And tonight, through the hazy thoughts fogging up his mind, he just wants to see her.

Kate is sitting at her dining room table, a glass of wine in her hand and a puzzle in front of her. She frowns down at the array of black cats scattered about a pumpkin patch, the thousand piece monstrosity spread before her. Burke said she should find something to distract herself with when she's feeling overwhelmed - something tangible and engaging, like a puzzle. Maybe she should have been less ambitious with her choice.

The knock on the door is almost a relief.

She pushes away from table, sets down her wine, and glides toward the entryway with something like anticipation brimming in her chest. She knows it's him. Who else would it be?

"Still afraid of the demon, Castle?" she chuckles, swinging the door open.

He's standing on the other side, swaying slightly on his feet.

He blinks, brightens. "Kate. Hi."

She tilts her head at him quizzically. "Castle. Have you been drinking?"

"What?" he sputters, lifting an affronted hand to his chest. She purses her lips as he lists further to one side. "No. No, it's just - it's the witching hour, Beckett."

"Excuse me?" she deadpans, but he's pushing his way inside. Kate sighs and shuts the door behind him.

"The witching hour! It's the time of night when witches, demons, and ghosts are thought to be at their most powerful," he rambles on, making excited gestures with his hands. "Times vary, but it usually happens after midnight."

"So," she surmises, strolling towards him as he paces in her kitchen. "You're here to... protect me?"

He nods, solemn.

"We've been dealing excessively in the supernatural this week, Beckett," he murmurs, narrowing his gaze on her. "What if we upset the balance?"

"The only balance upset tonight is yours," she chuckles, stopping in front of him and placing a steadying hand to his waist. "Did you catch a cab here, or car service?"

"Cab," he sighs, leaning towards her. She quirks an eyebrow as he touches his hand to her shoulder, his fingers curling around the hair still twined in a loose braid. "You never wore your hair like this before."

Kate ignores the low, thoughtful timber of his voice, the intensity of his gaze on her.

"I don't always have the energy to style it," she shrugs, letting him play with the rope of her hair. "Keeping my arms up too long aggravates my scars. So sometimes just letting it dry on its own and tying it back is easier."

"Right," he says, sobering slightly, dropping her hair. His gaze drifts to the covered spot on her chest where he knows a bullet pierced instead. "Right."

"It was helpful for this case to have it out of my face, though," she scrambles, not even sure why she does. Only that she wants to see him smile again, to keep the darkness from his eyes. "Made it easier to ghost hunt."

His lips quirk at that.

"Speaking of... since you're here, do you maybe want to watch a movie? Something on theme?" she hedges, chewing on her lip nervously. But Castle only brightens, practically bouncing on the balls of his feet.

"Oh yeah! There's a horror movie marathon on right now!"

He scrambles around her to reach the couch, hitting her coffee table on the way. Kate rolls her eyes, but follows him with warmth spreading through the usual ache of her chest.

A bloodcurdling scream startles him awake, his arm reflexively tightening around the warmth of Kate's shoulder- oh.

Castle blinks past the grit of sleep in his eyes, enough to look down and find the curl of Kate's body beside his. She's sleeping hard, her limbs heavy and loose against his, puffs of her breath escaping from the slight part of her lips and pooling along his clavicle. He checks the laptop in front of them, the small screen with a black and white film playing on the coffee table - some slasher film he doesn't remember them starting.

He sighs and relaxes back against the plush of her couch and the nest of blankets around them. They both must have dozed off during the first film, shifted closer through lack of consciousness - because this is definitely not the position he remembers watching the movie in. It's the only conceivable notion for Kate Beckett cuddling up against him like this.

"S'wrong?" she mumbles, her shoulders shifting against his chest, her head lifting from the alcove between his neck and collarbone. Her hand rises from beneath the throw across her shoulders and rests on his chest. "Heart's racing."

"Movie," he assures her quickly. "I heard screaming, woke me up."

She hums, still not totally awake and drops her cheek back to his shoulder, nuzzles him. Oh god. It's a Halloween miracle. A torturous, wonderful miracle of a moment.

"Must be late," she yawns, her eyelashes tickling his throat.

He swallows hard. "Yeah, I - I better go. I think I slept off most of the alcohol, I'm sorry. I-"

"Why'd you come here tonight, Castle?" she questions softly, the drowsiness leaking from her voice as awareness swam to the surface.

"I... missed you," he tries, going for lighthearted, but he can feel the dismissal emanating from her.

"You saw me a few hours earlier," she reminds him.

"Yeah, but then... well, me and Alexis were talking, about relationships, and I started thinking about you. Then she went to bed and I starting drinking a little too much too soon-"

"Thinking of me makes you want to drink?"

"What? No, no," he sputters quickly, his heart picking up a panicked speed again. "I just - I had a couple of glasses and I'm - I'm always thinking about you, Kate. Sometimes a little too much. I didn't mean to just show up, but I... when I'm not with you, I wish I was. I think the alcohol just made it easier to rationalize doing something about it."

She's quiet for a long time and he wants to jump out of the window behind them. He's an absolute idiot. Maybe he still has more liquor in his system than he thought.

He's thinking up a way to get out of this gracefully, to preserve whatever dignity he may have left, when she turns her body further into him.

"Oh Castle," she sighs, the melancholy so heavy in the exhale of his name. "I'm sorry."

His brow furrows and he cups her shoulder. "Sorry? Beckett, you didn't do-"

"I feel like I'm just... keeping you in some stupid limbo," she mutters, fisting a hand in the chest of his t-shirt.

"Kate, no," he protests, but her head is already shaking. "Hey, we're waiting. I agreed to wait and I'm okay with it."

"Castle-"

"I'd wait forever, okay?"

A broken noise escapes her lips and then she's shifting against him, rotating in the curve of his arm to face him, desperate eyes meeting his.

"Not forever," she whispers, more vulnerable than he's ever seen her. "And it shouldn't - it doesn't have to be miserable."

He tilts his head at her, confused. "It's not miserable. This-" He waves a hand between them. Her knees are bent into his lap, his arm is loose and low at her back, and he can feel the heat of her breath on his chin. "Is not miserable."

Kate quirks her lips, but shakes her head at him. She leans forward, her forehead grazing his, their noses bumping. He sucks in a quiet breath.

"No," she murmurs, her lashes low and hiding her eyes from him. "But the day to day? The wanting? I'm kind of miserable, Castle."

He clings to the thoughtless courage that brought him here tonight and reaches forward, his palm curving over the heat of her nape as he drags her in close. He catches her sigh of relief on his mouth when he seals his lips to hers.

Castle buries his fingers in her hair, dismantling the beautiful twine of her braid, but she doesn't seem to mind. Kate cups his face in her hands, rising on her knees to tower over him as she does. He can't contain his moan, his gasp of her name when she opens her mouth over his, caresses her tongue to the seam of his lips.

He leans back further into the sofa, her chest falling flush against his as she follows, keeping close. His hands are ceaseless in their exploration along her spine, trailing the bones of her vertebrae, tracing the hem of the loose sweater, the band of her leggings. She hums at the first touch of his fingers to naked skin, the spark palpable, and he splays his hand wide across her lower back to trap it there.

He barely realizes she's in his lap, her thighs astride his hips until he's clutching his hand in her hair again, tearing away from the perfect dance of her lips for air.

She damn near whines - a sound he was not ready for - and nips at his jaw. His hips jerk and they both still.

"Kate," he murmurs, gentling her with the massage of his fingertips to her scalp. Her head falls to his shoulder and he drops his back against the head of the sofa. "I think this might be the best Halloween ever."

She chokes out a laugh. "Halloween is tomorrow, Castle."

"No, it's past midnight. It's today," he argues wistfully. She sighs and it feels so normal already, bickering between makeouts on her couch. Oh, please let this be his new normal. "Speaking of, do you want to come over tomorrow night, help handout candy to trick-or-treaters?"

He feels her throat work with a swallow, but he doesn't move, doesn't say anything. He lets her think it through, lets her imagine a sense of normalcy that goes beyond this massive leap they took tonight.

"Yeah," Kate decides, sitting back on his knees. She offers him a shy smile, her lips kiss-swollen and lovely. She bridges her fingers at his nape, brushes her thumbs to the fine hairs at the base of his scalp. "I'd like that, Castle. I'd also like it if you were here in the morning," she adds, lowering her eyes to the collar of his shirt that her fingers absentmindedly straighten. "We could talk more about... this, over coffee."

He reaches up, strokes one of the stray curls from her cheek.

"Then tell me not to go," he tests. "Tell me to stay."

Kate unfurls from his lap to stand and snags his hands on her way up, dragging him along after her. He rises from the sofa with stiff knees, stumbling into her, and she grins, wrapping arms around his neck. And he can't help marveling at her even then, with her hair a wreck from his hands and her clothes askew, the city at their backs painting streaks of lights across her face, her sparkling eyes and the smile she saves for him and him alone.

"Don't go." She takes a step backwards, leading him towards a half-opened door, to what he assumes is her bedroom. She pauses in the doorway and arches on the toes of her bare feet. "Stay with me tonight." She presses a kiss to the corner of his mouth, dropping another to his cheek, the crease of his eye. "Wake up with me in the morning." His heart is pounding and he tangles his arms around her waist, pulls her in close. Her lips form a smile against his skin. "Then take me to the loft to prep for trick-or-treaters."

He smiles into the kiss he presses to her lips. He kisses her until they're both breathless and stumbling into her bedroom. They trip and land in a heap on her bed, his body half atop hers as he rises to an elbow, strokes his thumb to the harsh bone of her smiling cheek.

"Happy Halloween, Beckett."

She chuckles against his mouth when he kisses her again, her arms banding firm around his neck and tugging him closer.

"Might just be my new favorite holiday."

#castle fanfiction #castle x beckett #castle au #kate beckett #richard castle #castle #4x06 #mine #happy halloween to all #and to all a good night #and happy november!#I did not have time to edit this #so I apologize for what I'm sure are numerous errors

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