#For the life of me I can’t figure out backgrounds
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Piaaaaaa "brushing their arm against the other's, hoping the other would finally catch their arm and hold it close" please, we already know they constantly brush arms anyway!
fridaaaa this took me, once again, many months to get to and i sort of only vaguely filled the actual prompt, but i hope you still enjoy it <3
5+1 things, rated t, wc: 4k
[read on ao3]
I.
Eddie’s first day as a probationary firefighter is…interesting. Captain Nash welcomes him with the same warm smile he gave him the first time they talked, then leads him inside and shows him around the app bay.
“We’ll give you the full tour later,” he promises, “after you’ve met the rest of the team. You’re the first one here, if you want, you can change into your uniform now.”
He points towards the locker room – which has glass walls for some reason – and Eddie nods.
He’s just finished buttoning up his shirt when Captain Nash ushers a group of firefighters inside. Eddie runs a hand through his hair to make sure it’s tidy and smiles as Hen and Chimney introduce themselves to him with warm smiles and handshakes, welcoming him to the team.
There’s a third person with them, hovering in the background and glowering at Eddie. He’s young, probably around Eddie’s age, tall and very built, and despite his hostile expression, he doesn’t give Eddie the impression of being an asshole. It’s like the expression doesn’t fit on his face, like he’s not used to wearing it.
Chim grabs him by the arm and pushes him forward, giving Eddie a commiserating smile.
“And this guy is Buck,” he says. “He was our probie before you.”
“Nice to meet you,” Eddie says politely, stretching a hand out to offer a handshake. “You’ll have to show me how things work around here, then.”
Buck glowers down at his hand, and when he finally grabs it, he squeezes it too tightly, like he’s trying to prove something. Eddie squeezes back, amused by the pretense this guy is clearly putting on.
Behind Buck’s back, Hen rolls her eyes, but she’s also wearing a fond look, which only confirms Eddie’s assumption that Buck isn’t half as bad as he’s pretending to be.
From Captain Nash, he knows that they’re supposed to work together a lot of the time, so that’s gonna be interesting. He doesn’t know why Buck is acting like this, but he’s gonna find out, and then he’s gonna figure out a way to work with Buck anyway.
He didn’t come here to make friends, but he’ll be spending 50 hours a week with these people, and he has to trust them with his life for a lot of that time, so they at the very least need to bury whatever hatchet Buck is carrying right now.
Eddie lets go of his hand with a nod and a polite smile, and gives himself a week to figure Buck out.
II.
The days between the accident and the funeral are kind of a blur.
There’s too much to do and think about, too many decisions to make, too many people to call, too much to organize. He has help – Abuela, Pepa, the entire 118, but it still feels too much.
Shannon was 27, she didn’t have a will, they never talked about any of this. How is Eddie supposed to know how she would like to be buried, or if she’d rather be cremated? What kind of music she would want them to play at her funeral? This wasn’t supposed to happen. Not for a very, very long time.
But it did happen, and now Eddie is somehow supposed to know all this about her, his wife, the woman he’s only just let back into his and Christopher’s lives, the woman who asked him for a divorce and completely pulled the rug from under his feet just a day before she died.
Sometimes, he feels like he didn’t know her at all.
His parents are here “to help”, which should be a relief but really isn’t. They never liked Shannon and aren’t making a secret of it, even now that– now that she’s gone. So Eddie can’t involve them in the funeral planning, and he can’t even leave Christopher with them because he’s scared that they’re gonna take the opportunity to grab him and run, and someone needs to make sure that Shannon’s memory is honored, but she didn’t have any family except him and Christopher, and Chris is seven, so Eddie has to be the one to make this funeral beautiful, something she’d deserve, but he doesn’t know– there’s so much–
“Eddie,” someone says next to him, snapping him out of his spiral. “Come on, breathe with me.”
Eddie stares at Buck’s chest as it rises and falls with exaggerated breaths, trying to match him. When did Buck get here? He doesn’t remember letting him in, doesn’t really remember what he was doing before he started hyperventilating on his couch.
“Chris,” he gasps when he realizes that also means he’s not sure where his kid is. And of course he’s the kind of father who would do that only days after his kid lost his mom, maybe his parents are–
“Is with Hen and Karen,” Buck says firmly, grabbing his forearm. “He’s gonna spend the day with them and Denny, probably getting spoiled rotten. I borrowed Pepa’s key when we went over there so they could pick him up, she told me you might not open – sorry for barging in here, but I’m glad I did. I know you– I wanted to– Bobby and Athena are running interference with your parents. And I’m here to help you with all that.” He gestures towards the couch table that’s covered in forms, leaflets from funeral homes, and cards from grief counselors. “After Abby’s mom– I helped plan her funeral. So I’ve got some experience.”
Eddie just stares at him, biting the inside of his cheek hard to stop himself from crying. He trusts Buck, but he still doesn’t want to cry in front of him, doesn’t want to cry in front of anyone. But he does think that maybe he should give Buck his own copy of a key, so he won’t have to borrow Pepa’s next time.
Buck squeezes his forearm and gives him a small, sad smile. “We’re all here for you, Eddie. I got your back, remember?”
Eddie blinks against the tears in his eyes and swallows around the lump in his throat that’s keeping him from saying anything.
Instead, he twists his arm from Buck’s grip and grabs his hand instead, squeezing it in a silent thank you.
Buck squeezes back and keeps holding on.
III.
Buck gets to go home earlier than anyone expected, but Eddie has been to his new apartment, so he isn’t surprised when Buck texts him a picture of his couch with a sad face. It’s not ideal, but at least he has a bathroom downstairs and a girlfriend who can help if he struggles with anything.
Until he doesn’t have that girlfriend anymore.
Eddie doesn’t find out until after his shield ceremony, days after, actually, once his parents have finally gone home to Texas.
Buck says he’s fine, obviously, but Eddie starts going over every day he doesn’t have a shift anyway, because he knows Buck and can see how much he’s struggling with the whole situation, with the uncertainty of when and how he can return to work.
He brings Christopher most of the time. They’re not having the best summer either, Eddie still worries that he’s not doing enough to help Christopher deal with his grief, when he can barely keep his own head above the water of grief, guilt and fear.
Carla is doing what she can, watching Christopher whenever Eddie’s working, she found him a grief counselor and is even looking into more permanent therapists.
None of it changes the fact that they’re grieving.
But when Christopher gets to hang out with Buck, he lights up every time, and so does Buck, which makes this a two birds with one stone kind of situation. Hanging out with Buck helps them both, too, makes their grief not the first thing on their minds for a little while.
Buck can’t move much, so they play board games and try to find one they all enjoy equally – it’s not easy, since Eddie likes luck-based games (he plays poker with his abuela and tía whenever he can), Buck prefers trivia and games relying on knowledge, while Christopher likes strategic games most.
But everyone gets to pick sometimes, and when they don’t want to play board games, they switch to video games instead.
Eddie knew that Buck and Chris get along well, they have ever since the first time they met, when Buck drove Eddie to Chris’ school after the earthquake during Eddie’s second week at the 118. But with how much time the three of them are spending together now, he can see them growing closer every day – and he loves it.
Buck is his best friend, and he genuinely cares about Christopher in a way that feels completely independent from Eddie.
One evening, while they’re playing a few rounds of Christopher’s current favorite video game after dinner, the kid falls asleep between them on the couch.
Buck smiles down at him and lowers the volume of the TV, which means he loses even more clearly to Eddie, but he had the win in the bag anyway, he’s sure.
Buck rolls his eyes at him when Eddie celebrates his victory with big, silent gestures, but he’s smiling, too.
Eddie grins at him, resting his arm on the back of the couch behind Chris, and Buck twists a little to face him. His leg, resting outstretched on the couch table in front of them, moves with him, and Eddie slides Christopher’s glass of water out of the way in a practiced move.
“I know you’re here to keep an eye on me,” Buck says, “and I should probably be annoyed. I– I was kind of annoyed, at first. But it’s hard to stay annoyed when he’s here, right?” He nods down at Christopher. “And I guess you’re okay, too.”
“Wow, thanks,” Eddie says, but he knows his glare isn’t convincing. “To be clear, we’re all keeping an eye on each other.”
“Yeah, yeah.” Buck reaches for Eddie’s hand, still on the backrest between them, and squeezes it – just for a moment, like he’s trying to get Eddie’s attention, like he doesn’t already have it anyway. “Thanks.”
IV.
Everything sucks.
It’s the uncertainty that gets to Eddie most, the not knowing how to help, how to stay safe, how to keep his loved ones safe. How long this is gonna last.
Every day, they have to see people die from a virus they know nothing about, and can’t do anything against.
And afterwards, they can’t even go home.
Christopher is part of a high risk group, and Eddie risks exposure at work every day, so obviously, he can’t endanger him by living with him. Chimney feels the same way about Maddie, and Hen also wants to keep her family safe, which is how the three of them ended up at Buck’s apartment, where they’ve been camped out for the past three weeks.
It’s generous of Buck to let them all stay with him, but the loft is not made for four people to live there, and they’re all feeling it.
Eddie loves his friends, but spending every minute of every day with them is starting to wear on him. They all try to give each other space, using the balcony as an extra room or going for runs outside, but there’s only so much they can do.
He hates being separated from Chris, it makes him feel like he’s breaking his promise to never leave him behind again. Christopher says he understands, but Eddie worries anyway. He trusts Pepa, who’s working fully remote and offered to stay with Chris, and they talk every day, but it’s not the same as being there.
Whenever he talks to Chris on the phone, he feels better in the moment, but worse the second they hang up. While they’re talking, he can almost pretend that things are normal, but it all comes crashing down afterwards.
He hasn’t hugged his son in weeks, and he has no idea when he’s even gonna see him in person again.
Buck joins their calls most of the time, at least for a few minutes, and he sits next to Eddie on the bed now, shoulders slumped where they’re touching Eddie’s. In a world where he has to keep his distance from almost everyone, except the patients he’s treating and the people he’s living with, touching and being touched by Buck is a real comfort.
“This won’t be forever, Eddie,” he says, almost desperately.
“But for how long?” Eddie asks, and it comes out sounding a little wobbly.
He’s not embarrassed by it anymore – Buck’s seen him in all kinds of situations, and they’re currently sharing a bed, so he’s seen him cry anyway.
“I–I wish I knew,” Buck says. “I wish I could– fix this.”
Eddie wipes at his eye and laughs a little. “The whole pandemic?”
“If I could, yeah.” Buck shrugs.
Eddie presses even closer to him for a moment, a gentle pressure of their shoulders, arms and thighs against each other. “I wish you could, too. But even if you can’t – I’m glad you’re here.”
“Of course.” Buck smiles at him and places his hand on Eddie’s thigh, palm up.
Eddie smiles back and grabs his hand, squeezing tightly.
“Okay,” he says, taking a deep breath. “I think it’s our turn to make dinner tonight – you ready?”
“Ready when you are,” Buck says, but he doesn’t let go until Eddie does.
V.
After Chris has gone to sleep, after Eddie has finally stopped crying, after Buck has wrapped his knuckles and cleaned up the worst of the mess in Eddie’s bedroom – the shards, the pieces of drywall, the fallen furniture, he makes up the couch for Eddie to sleep on. Eddie wants to help him, to tell him that he’ll just sleep in his room, but he can’t seem to move from his seat at the dining table.
Everything feels like too much, his hands hurt and his head worse, and he can’t stand the thought of Buck leaving. He’s exhausted, but he knows he won’t sleep if Buck goes home now.
But he can’t ask him to stay, not after Buck already dropped everything because Eddie couldn’t keep it together. He probably had plans, and Eddie ruined those too.
He can already feel the hot burn of tears behind his eyes again and drops his forehead onto his arms, folded on the table in front of him.
Buck’s hand lands on his back, warm, then travels up to squeeze the back of his neck gently.
“You ready to sleep?” he murmurs, and Eddie makes a noncommittal sound. “Come on, you must be exhausted.”
Eddie shrugs and Buck’s thumb brushes along his hairline.
“You don’t have to go in there, I can get you anything you need,” Buck says quietly. “And I’ll be right next to you in case you have a nightmare.”
“You’re staying?” Eddie asks, lifting his head. Buck’s hand stays where it is.
“Of course, Eddie,” Buck says, like it’s that easy.
And maybe it is that easy, Eddie thinks when they settle in next to each other in the living room, Eddie on the couch and Buck on a makeshift bed next to it. He’s pushed the couch table to the side to make room for it and it looks like he’s dragged Eddie’s mattress here, so at least Eddie doesn’t need to worry about him sleeping on the floor.
They’ve been by each other’s side through so much shit, maybe it’s not such a surprise that Buck wants to be here now too. He’s just not sure he deserves it.
“I’m sorry,” he says, staring up at the ceiling instead of looking at Buck. “You had plans– I’m sure you didn’t want to–”
“You have nothing to apologize for,” Buck says firmly. “Of course I’ll come whenever Christopher calls. O–or if you need me. I’m here, okay?”
“I keep thinking about her,” Eddie mumbles, pressing the heels of his hands to his burning eyes. “Mills. Last August– I should’ve– if I’d picked up the phone earlier–”
“This isn’t on you.” There’s rustling and then Buck is gripping Eddie’s forearms, trying to gently pull his hands away from his face. “I d-don’t know what Mills was going through, but I know that you couldn’t have known how bad it was. It’s sad, and it’s unfair, but it’s not your fault. And I know you’re feeling all these things now, but Eddie– I’m so happy you’re still here. I need you to– know that. Okay?”
Eddie finally lowers his arms, but instead of letting go fully, Buck just grabs his right hand and holds on. His eyes are wide and scared, and Eddie has scared too many people he loves tonight.
“Okay,” he says, even though– well. What makes him special? Why should he be the only one to get out? He’s not a better person than any of them, he doesn’t have a right to happiness or whatever he’s been deluding himself into believing he could have.
But he knows that he can’t tell Buck that now (or ever), knows that it’s a dark road to go down.
Maybe for tonight, with Buck by his side, he can keep the thoughts at bay for a little bit longer. After that– he has no idea. But Buck is still holding his hand, and Eddie may not deserve him, but he trusts him.
He thinks it may just give him enough hope to get through this night.
+ I
“This was nice,” Buck says, holding the door for Eddie as they leave the restaurant. “You, uh, you really didn’t have to pay, though.”
“I wanted to,” Eddie says with a smile, glancing right towards their cars and then left to where the beach is only a short walk away, and finally back to Buck’s face, finding him already looking back. “How do you feel about taking a walk?”
Buck grins, turning left. “Let’s go.”
They’re not on a date, or at least they haven’t called it that, but Eddie has been thinking that it feels like one all night. Technically, they’re two friends trying out a new restaurant together. They drove here separately, no one pulled anyone’s chair out, they talked the same way they always do.
But Eddie spent half an hour picking something to wear tonight, Buck is wearing a shirt that looks new and gorgeous and fit for a date, and every time their eyes caught across the table, Eddie thought that maybe, Buck wouldn’t pull away if he reached out and took his hand.
It’s not the first time Eddie has thought that. Ever since Buck and Tommy broke up, it’s felt like maybe they’re heading towards something, familiar touches lingering and turning into something new, gazes catching and then holding instead of looking away.
Buck was upset for a little while afterwards, but he admitted to Eddie that it was more about another failed relationship – and his first one with a man, after he thought he’d finally figured out what was missing, than about Tommy as a person.
He went on a couple of dates, with men and women, but nothing ever stuck.
Eddie was going through his own stuff at the time – he eventually came out to Buck a week before Chris finally came home, and Buck hasn’t been on a date since.
Sometimes, Eddie wonders (hopes), if the two things are related.
Still, neither of them has called tonight a date – yet.
Eddie glances at Buck’s profile while they’re walking, and wonders what he’s waiting for.
Yes, it’s scary because Buck is the most important person in his life right after Christopher, but it’s also not, because this is Buck. Who has been by Eddie’s side through the worst, most painful, most humiliating times of his life, and is still here. Buck, who Eddie trusts with his life, and his son, and his heart.
Buck smiles at him and Eddie smiles back, heartbeat picking up. He’s doing this, he’s gonna tell Buck how he feels. Any minute now, he’s gonna be brave enough.
“Hey,” Buck says, “it’s just me.”
“I know,” Eddie says, and his heart thumps against his ribs. He lets his fingers brush against Buck’s on their next swing and watches as Buck bites his lip, smiling down at the ground. Hushed, like a confession, he adds, “Are you nervous, too?”
Buck looks back up at him then, eyes glittering in the dark. “Y-yeah. I am.”
They’ve reached the edge of the beach by now and bend down to take off their shoes without having to talk about it.
When they start walking again, they’re even closer than before, the backs of their hands, their elbows and shoulders all brushing with every step.
Eddie keeps stealing glances at Buck, and almost every time, Buck is already looking back.
There aren’t many people at the beach at this time of day, so they don’t come close to anyone else, and all they hear is the sand beneath their feet and the waves crashing a few feet away. The moon is big enough to be reflected on the sea, a beautiful sight, but Eddie still can’t look away from Buck for long.
“So, this is, uh, kind of romantic,” Buck blurts out after a few quiet minutes. “Right? I–I’m not misreading that?”
“No,” Eddie says. “I mean– you’re not misreading it.”
“But you’re nervous.”
When their knuckles brush again, Eddie stretches out his fingers and catches Buck’s, holding on. Buck’s own fingers tighten immediately, and it gives Eddie the last bit of courage he needs.
“Well, yeah. Buck–” He stops walking, and Buck follows, turning so he’s facing Eddie. He’s close enough that Eddie can see his expression despite the dark, and he looks terrified, hopeful, nervous and excited at the same time, all of which Eddie feels, too. Eddie takes a deep breath. “I’m nervous because– nothing…no one’s ever been this important.”
A smile spreads out across Buck’s face, slowly deepening the crinkles around his eyes. “So this was a date?”
“Did it feel like one to you, too?”
Buck’s smile widens. “Yeah, i–it did. And I’m–I’m nervous too, of course. Eddie, if we do this, there’s no going back for me. I can’t– lose you. You and Christopher, you’re too important.”
He pulls on Eddie’s hand a little, and Eddie takes another step closer, drops his shoes in the sand and places his free hand on Buck’s shoulder, thumb resting against his collarbone.
“It’s the same for me,” he says quietly. He shivers when Buck grabs his waist, the warmth of his hand seeping through Eddie’s shirt. “I– We don’t know what’s gonna happen. But, Buck– I love you. I love you so much, I have for…way longer than I was aware of it, and I just don’t see that going away. And I don’t think it’s fair to us to deny ourselves when I really think we could make each other– so happy. I know I can make you happy, and I want to prove it to you every day of my life, Buck.”
Buck is just staring at him with a dazed expression, his lips slightly parted, and Eddie suddenly can’t stand not kissing him for a second longer.
He slides his hand from Buck’s shoulder to the back of his neck, watches Buck’s eyes flutter shut and feels his fingers tighten on his waist, and then he’s finally, finally closing the distance between them.
Buck makes a soft sound against his mouth, like he’s still somehow surprised this is happening, but he gets on board very quickly, and Eddie stops thinking entirely.
When they pull back breathlessly, Eddie’s hair is a mess – he can feel the loose strands on his forehead – his lips are still tingling, and Buck’s got both arms wrapped around him tightly.
“In case that wasn’t clear,” Buck gasps, and lifts a hand to cup Eddie’s cheek. His thumb brushes over Eddie’s chin and caresses his lower lip, and Eddie presses a kiss to the pad of it. “I love you, too.”
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My Heart, in Paint, on a Piece of Paper
My fic for the @bylerbigbang is finally here! I wrote about Will's art, Byler through the years, and Mike finding out and dealing with the lie Will told about the painting. Thank you to the wonderful @ninaninndraws for the amazing art for this piece, and I hope y'all enjoy it!
Tags: T, Canon typical horror, body horror, period typical homophobia, Will Byers/Mike Wheeler, background Lucas/Max, canon compliant El/Mike, Mike Wheeler, Will Byers, Lucas Sinclair, Dustin Henderson, Erica Sinclair, Eleven, Mike PoV, friends to lovers, fluff and angst, angst with a happy ending, canon compliant, S5 spec fic, Miwi
Summary:
Making a friend on his first day of Kindergarten may be the most significant thing Mike has ever done, but that's okay because Will is the coolest, smartest and most talented person Mike will ever know. Even better, Will gifts Mike all the best pieces of his art. Except suddenly they’re growing up and apart, and then there is no more Will and no more drawings. When they finally reunite, all Will has left to offer him is a painting that wasn't even his idea, and as the world ends and the final fight for Hawkins begins, Mike has to figure out how to salvage the most important relationship of his life – because that may very well be key to saving his hometown and the people he loves. - Or, 5 times Will gifts Mike his art and the 1 time he pretends it was someone else's idea.
Excerpt:
Mike could feel his heart beating all the way in his throat as he inhaled in preparation, but he said what he had to say anyway: “We can’t leave yet, we need to wait for Mrs. Byers.”
His mother opened her mouth to reply, then closed it again, confusion plain on her face. Mike had expected as much: He had barely agreed to stay here without her this morning, and that mostly because he knew if he threw a tantrum the information would get back to Nancy, which he couldn’t have. He was a big kid, just like her, and big kids went to kindergarten without making a fuss. But then he’d met Will, and none of that mattered anymore: He liked going to kindergarten now because that was where Will was.
On the other side of the room a few kids chattered away loudly as they waited for their own parents, but Mike still caught the moment the scritch scritch of crayon over paper stopped beside him.
Will smiled when he replied, but it wasn’t the happy kind. “It’s alright. My dad’s picking me up, and I know he’s going to be late.”
His mother came to a conclusion just then, and Mike prepared himself to argue with her. But she just pulled up the chair on his other side and sat down.
She smiled, too, but it also wasn’t the happy kind. “It’s alright. The elementary school doesn’t let out until a few minutes from now anyway, and I’m sure Nancy won’t mind waiting a little.”
Mike turned to face Will before rolling his eyes, knowing he’d get into trouble if his mother saw him. “She won’t even notice because she’s too busy gossiping with Barb.”
Will giggled and picked his crayons back up, putting the finishing touches on the spaceship he was drawing.
They had spent most of the time since coming back inside after recess talking about outer space, which Mike was obsessed with since he’d seen the poster for an upcoming movie. His mother had already told him she wouldn’t let him see it because it was for older kids, but that didn’t stop him from imagining the plot of it: The blond hero was the handsomest and best of an order of space knights, and his mission was to save the princess from a creepy evil robot sorcerer. He used his laser sword to try and defeat the evil sorcerer’s robot dragon in an epic battle, and then the princess would weep bitterly when it seemed that the hero had been defeated. But secretly he needed the princess’ tears as the last ingredient of a potion that would turn the robot dragon and the sorcerer’s entire secret space base into rust. Then they would ride off in his spaceship to live happily ever after.
Will had been drawing the scenes as Mike described them to him, and Mike thought that was the greatest thing ever. Will was good, which made Mike feel a little embarrassed at his own lack of artistic talent, but not envious. This wasn’t like when his sister was better at something than him: It was awesome that Will was so good at art, and Mike enjoyed talking while he drew, providing ideas for Will’s next masterpiece. Will managed to make everything look exactly like it did in Mike’s head, too, which made the whole thing even better. Mike kind of wanted to ask Will if he could have one of the drawings, but just seeing his story come to life on paper was already the coolest thing in the world.
[continue on Ao3]
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Slight redraw and rendering practice
#hollow knight#artists on tumblr#hk#hollow knight fanart#hk hornet#hollow knight hornet#hornet#my art#For the life of me I can’t figure out backgrounds#Also ty for 333 of ya’ll Thats so cool
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sometimes it feels like stealing valor to say I’m chronically ill bc I don’t have One Big Thing wrong with me just a small cluster of chronic disorders, but sometimes I think about the fact that I need 2-3 specialists and a minimum of 4 daily medications to function enough to hold down a job and friendships and I just cannot believe people’s bodies and brains just… work.
#my neurologist gave me a referral to a pain specialist today bc after 6 years I’m still having a minimum of 8 migraines a month#and they can’t figure out why#they were like ‘do you have neck and jaw pain’ and I’m like ‘yes every day of my life sometimes my jaw pain is so bad I can’t chew’#and like. I know that’s not normal but to me I’ve lived with it for so long that just like#I believe that my body will always be in like 2-4 level pain#I’ve had this kind of pain since I was like 12/13 and everyone told me I was too young to have back and neck pain#so I just figured that everyone was in this kind of pain and every time I learn that’s not true I’m shocked and I never learn my lesson#tho I think part of it is that I’ve been living with my pain for so long it’s the background noise of my life and it’s just my normal#I don’t think to fix my normal#ren speaks
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Update: I’m working on my next ‘animation’
It’s different from what I originally planned. Backgrounds are hell.
And I’m 100% making everything harder for myself by not looking up tutorials. But we’ll get through it
#animation#I have no clue what I’m doing#I’m halfway through an idea until I figure out there’s an easier way to do it and I have to delete all my hard work#also I hate backgrounds#I can’t do them digitally for the life of me#yes I refuse to look up tutorials on how to do backgrounds#I’m not a coward but I am very stupid
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I’m watching the good doctor and I’m like “hell yeah Bates Motel man, bad that he’s not autistic but good acting and stupid weird doctor show shit,” and then they’ll say something about autism and I’m like “oh no you talked to the wrongggg people.”
#There’s multiple instances of “you can’t control yourself because of your autism” but also “you should be able to control yourself!!”#Like there was an autistic guy who was very high needs and he has light sensitivity#He was inspired by the good doctor™️ and after his surgery his dad was like “let me get the lights”#But then hesitated and asked first and the son was like “it’s okay”#Like idk if you know this but overstimulation from light and sound and other stimulus is suh-uper not a choice#Or something you just character arc out of.#They have the doctor in the middle of a shooting and he melts down and doesn’t cooperate because he’s overwhelmed#And the guy shoots one of the patrons and Shaun gets blamed and the father figure in his life#Is just trying to get him to open up about the trauma but he also says he thinks he should have been able to get control of himself#And I wanted to scream#I’m hoping there’s a change but I gotta look into the behind the scenes#Because i bet my left butt cheek autism speaks probably pops up because Hollywood loves to use them without any background checking#Despite them being a hate group
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power couple
#wait the fact that you can see the pose thing in the background of the last one is killing me im gonna cry i didn’t notice 💀#nvm i sittily cloned it out bc it was distressing to me <3#anyways#THE MATCHING BOOTS ARE SO IMPORTANT TO ME PLEASE LOOK#they’re cute#you can kind of tell but something was clipping with her lashes and i can’t for the life of me figure it out lmao#i took all her acc off and even took off her heterocromia and it still didn’t fix it#idk#i game uo#my sims#hdmiports#sims 4 screenies#sims 4 screenshots
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I WANT YOU CLOSER, CLOSER EVEN STILL ; SUGURU GETO
synopsis; in the midst of a rainshower, you run into your mysterious classmate.
word count; 6.1k
contents; suguru geto/reader, gn!reader, implied no curses au, fluffy summer vibes, forced proximity (my beloved <3), pining, very shoujo manga coded, vague allusions to sugu having a troubled background, (kind of same w reader), switching povs, gojo slander, stsg implications if you squint (my brand), he’s a sweet sweet boy and i love him :((
a/n; teen sugu reminds me a lot of the kind upperclassman type of otome game li… with secret emotional baggage that makes his route really hard to complete….. anyway i dedicate this fic to hit mobage jujutsu kaisen: phantom parade PLEASE bring sugu home to me please please please ple
geto looks beautiful in the rain.
it’s an embarrassing first thought to have, as he rounds the corner and comes into view. a black head of hair, making you stop in your tracks, breathe in a gulp of humid air.
you can’t help it, though.
it’s raining. droplets ricochet against the sidewalk in an endless cadence, the sky above you blanketed by gray clouds; enveloping your city in a summery shadow, the scent of hot concrete and blossoming hydrangeas. everything smells of a blistering summer, youth in a bottle cap. tasty on your tongue.
those very same hydrangeas surround him, on all sides, framing his figure like a painting come to life — splotches of colour, flecks of purple and pink and blue, clashing with the gray sky and the black umbrella in his hand. he looks a little disheveled, hair a little frizzy, bangs sticking to his skin. oddly at peace. when his eyes meet yours, you see a flash of recognition — a tiny spark in the amber hue.
you take that as your cue to move closer.
he waits for you, always so patient, smiling as you look both ways before crossing the street — shoes hitting the concrete in a steady thud, thud, thud. a splash from the puddle you step in.
you’re in a good mood. veins flooding with sugar and buzzing with joy, raindrops sticking to your skin and the plastic bag in your hand, absently humming along to a song playing through your headphones. your clothes are soaked, but you’re smiling; swinging the bag of treats as you walk. bags of chips, colourful lollipops, bottles of ramune, clinking together for every step you take. enough to last you a couple weeks. in your good mood, you ended up stocking up on your classmates’ favorites — bouncing on the balls of your feet at the thought of giving them away, seeing their satisfied little expressions.
you even got something for gojo. he’ll have to fight for it, obviously, but you look forward to seeing his face light up when he takes a bite of the soft mochi.
(you like giving them things. it’s fun. it makes you feel like a normal high school kid.)
nothing can dampen your spirits right now. the entire world smells of rain, and hydrangeas, and apple blossoms from the backyards behind you. a scent that creeps into your bloodstream, sneaks into your breath. a smile grows on your lips — blooming even brighter when you step into your classmate’s orbit.
”hey!” you chirp, raising a hand up in greeting.
”hey,” geto echoes, voice honeyed and smooth, bringing a hand up to wipe at his forehead. wet from the humid air. ”out on a walk?”
with a smile, you lift the plastic bag, grabbing his attention. clasping it tightly, with your wet fingers. ”just went to get some snacks. you?”
”i wanted to get some fresh air,” he smiles. eyeing you up and down. ”did you forget your umbrella?”
silently, he takes in your appearance. your breathing is a tiny bit laboured, and the flimsy, oversized hoodie you’re wearing is sticking to your skin. it’s all that protects you from the steady downpour; no umbrella to be seen. you look small, tilting your head up, meeting his gaze. he feels the beginnings of a smile play at his lips. exasperated. all you do is blink, seemingly unbothered, as if you aren’t straight on the road to catching a cold. you can be a little scatterbrained.
maybe that’s why he can’t help but dote on you.
(that’s what satoru calls it, at least. suguru thinks it’s just called being nice — not like satoru would know anything about that.)
”oh. no, i didn’t forget.” you scratch at the back of your neck. ”just didn’t know it was going to rain.”
the sudden downpour gave you no time to prepare, heavy and abrupt — clouds obscuring the glowing sun in what felt like no more than a second. like someone high above flicked the light switch of the world. all you could do was pull your hood up, try to walk under whatever apple tree you came across. it didn’t help much, though.
you shift your weight from one foot to the other, soles weighed down with dew. sort of sheepish.
geto chuckles, raspy and soft. the sound makes your heart skip a beat. ”didn’t you see the weather report?”
”well, it… just slipped my mind, i guess.”
silently, you avert your gaze. now you remember — yaga-sensei did mention that, didn’t he? you heard him say it. but you just forgot.
geto is laughing at you, a little, from within his eyes; at least that’s the impression you get. so you continue, eager to defend your honour.
”it’s fine, though,” you assure him, smiling brightly. a sunny grin. ”i like the rain!”
geto raises an unimpressed brow, but the expression fades away just as swiftly — giving way to something softer. ”you’re heading back to the dorms, right?” he asks, continuing once you give him a slight nod. ”then we can share.”
you blink. one moment passes, then two. but geto only smiles, shifting his umbrella a little, hoping you’ll get the hint. silently beckoning you over.
it makes you feel oddly flustered.
in truth, you and him aren’t particularly close. he’s nice to you, sure, but geto is nice to everyone. you’d like to call him a friend, but what do you actually know about him? not much.
suguru geto is a bit of an enigma. a little mysterious. he’s polite, well-mannered, and he seems like the most normal of your classmates — but the bar is in hell, because you know for a fact geto isn’t normal either. no normal guy deliberately chooses to keep his bangs like that.
there’s a gap, there. a kind of inconsistency. he’s hard to approach, but he puts you at ease. pulls you in and scares you off. with a soft voice and kind smile, keen eyes and a heavy palm on your head. sometimes he brings you snacks when you study in the library, or helps you with homework. kind of like a dependable senpai. someone to lean on.
… but then there’s that gap.
the real geto, who you’ve only seen glimpses of, only ever in gojo’s vicinity, is boyish and bright — he laughs and pouts and takes up space. he glows brighter than the sun. but the geto you’re seeing, right now, is more like the moon. wearing a polite, patient smile. standing up straight.
waiting for you to join him under his umbrella.
(he’s kind. but is he doing it because wants to, or because he feels obliged to?)
”… oh.” a pause. ”no, it’s fine!” you take a step back, quick to reassure him. ”i can walk there without it! i’m already soaked, anyway.”
geto observes you. for a moment, something in his expression flickers; a crease between his brows.
then he shakes his head. still wearing a comforting smile, the same one he always slips on when he’s around you. ”still. we don’t want you catching a cold,” he persists, sounding something like a nagging mother. ”you’ll miss the exam next week.”
and with that, your shoulders drop.
right — the exam. the one you haven’t been studying for in the slightest, completely distracted by the feeling of summer in the air. the one you can’t fail, under any circumstances, because yaga-sensei can and will force you to take summer classes ad compensation. that exam.
a wistful sigh leaves your lips. ”god, i wish.”
geto chuckles — a little deeper than usual. it makes your heart flutter. then he’s beckoning you over, again, with a slight shake of his head.
”c’mon. there’s enough room for two.”
he gives you that same familiar smile, and you’re forced to admit that you might be slightly weak to it. something about the way his lips tug upwards, the light crinkle of his eyes. a certain glint in them that tells you he’s not budging on the issue.
you’re still a little hesitant. but…
(this is a chance, isn’t it? a chance to bridge that gap between you.)
silently, shyly, you join him under his umbrella. shielding you from the still falling rain.
pitter patter, pitter patter. you don’t know where the rain ends and your own heartbeat begins. he’s so close — your shoulders nearly brushing together. it makes your nerves bubble up, in rhythm with the droplets bouncing off the cover up above. you feel stiff. the tiny, miniscule gap between you feels like a sweltering stove, radiating a heat that warns you to stay away. as if his touch could burn you. like this, you can even smell him; fresh laundry, an earthy cologne. the slightest hint of caffeine and tobacco. you blame it on shoko — the whole dormitory smells of cigarettes, thanks to her.
it’s comforting, though. his scent. blending together with the aroma of rain, wet earth, blooming flowers. with his fragrance smoothing over all your senses, the closeness between you a constant reminder of the situation you’re in, you can’t bring yourself to look at him.
all you do is murmur out a quick thanks, as you begin to walk, in tandem.
geto can’t help but steal a glance at you, out of the corner of his eye. you look a little meek, a little flustered. he hopes the narrow distance between you isn’t making you feel too uncomfortable.
just to be sure, he angles his body away from yours. ever so slightly, one subtle step away, to make the gap a little wider. then, as discreetly as he can manage, he tilts the umbrella in your direction — not wanting the never-ending drops of rain to graze your skin. he can feel them, now, soaking through the material of his shirt, hitting his shoulder. but he doesn’t mind. to his relief, you don’t seem to notice. he’s pretty sure you’d protest; and as enjoyable as another friendly squabble would be, he’d prefer to avoid it for now.
you’re nice. accommodating, he thinks, in a subtle kind of way. always showing up with trinkets after your little outings, offering to get everyone a drink on your way to the vending machines. you’re friendly with the other two; always nagging at shoko to stop smoking, even when she just rolls her eyes and calls you a goody two shoes. recently, you’ve even started to be patient with satoru, even when he tries to get a rise out of you. it wasn’t like that at the start of the year. geto wonders what changed.
he’s a little interested in you. just a little. you’re sweeter than the other two, easier to worry over. he saw you trip over your own shoelaces last week. you’re a little clumsy, a bit of a ditz — airheaded. maybe that’s why he can’t help but feel protective of you. satoru brushes everything off with a cheeky grin, and shoko is self-sustaining, but you’re often in need of a helping hand. the last time he tried that with the other two, they wouldn’t stop calling him mother geto until he smacked them over the head with satoru’s shounen jump issue.
it makes him feel out of place — when he doesn’t have anything to tend to. itchy, a feeling of dread crawling up his throat. peace and quiet feels suffocating, when he isn’t in total control over it.
so, in his own way, small as it may be, geto enjoys taking care of you. grabbing you a carton of strawberry milk, or warding satoru away when he’s annoying you a little too much. he likes the smile you grace him with when he does. it’s pretty. and it’s all geto really knows about you — that, and that there’s a tenderness to you that’s hard to fake. it’s not much to go on.
so this is the perfect opportunity to learn more.
(a heartfelt connection. something he’s always, always craved. something that maybe he can finally have, with satoru, and shoko, and you —
if you’re willing, that is.)
”hey,” he starts, breaking the rainfilled silence. keeping his umbrella steady, leading you both away from a big puddle in the middle of the sidewalk. ”can i ask you something?”
you raise your head to look at him. blinking owlishly, at the sudden question, nerves beginning to rise again. he sounds kind of serious. did you do something? paranoia gnaws anxiously at the ridges of your ribs, but all you can do is swallow empty air and stammer out a meek reply.
”… uh, sure!”
geto glances over at you, his eyes meeting yours. that gaze of his is kind of heavy — the deep colour of his eyes coaxing you closer, luring you in. honey and amber, splotches of cedar and flecks of gold.
they’re pretty.
”this might be kind of a weird question,” he begins, reaching a hand up to adjust his bun, sneaking a finger under the black hair tie. voice light; to put you at ease. ”but i’m just curious.”
he looks ahead, at the street before you, only meeting your stare once you give him a slight tilt of your head. then he parts his lips.
”why did you come here?”
you blink.
silently, confusion painting the interior of your iris, you stare at him. waiting for a clarification that doesn’t come, before giving him a hesitant answer. ”… to get snacks?”
geto has the audacity to laugh, after such a vague question. the sound is light and breathy, melting together with the pitter patter of the rain, and for some reason it strikes you as sincere. ”not like that,” he grins. ”i mean, why did you come to the school in the first place?”
ah.
that’s a different question. harder to answer. he must notice your hesitance, the puzzlement in your features, because he’s quick to elaborate. hiding a smile behind his fist, disguised as a cough.
(you’re sort of cute when you’re confused.)
”i mean — it’s an odd choice, isn’t it? far off the map, barely any students....” you nod along, and he continues. ”i don’t know about your background. but moving away from home must be kind of tough, right?” when he glances in your direction, you notice a sparkle of genuine curiosity in his eyes. ”so i was curious about your reason. if you feel comfortable telling me, i mean.”
a hum. it buzzes in your throat, absentminded, as you stare into space. brows furrowed.
geto gives you time, as much time as you need, always willing to wait. for a minute or so, the only sounds that fill the space around you are the pitter patter of raindrops hitting the plastic cover of umbrella, and the sound of your shoes meeting puddles on the street. silently, you ponder the question. thinking of your answer.
geto has a point. you’ve been curious, too — about how your classmates ended up in such an eccentric little school, so detached from the rest of the world. a quirky private school in the middle of nowhere. you must all be a little eccentric yourselves. that’s probably why you feel so safe with them — you get the sense that you’re all lacking something. something that would ward normal kids away from such an unorthodox choice.
you could say you were just going with the flow. a relative of yours used to work with yaga-sensei, and heard about his position at a newly reinstated private school — heard that he was looking for students to fill the roster.
so you accepted.
(if it was really that simple, geto would already have his answer.)
what drew you in, more than anything, was the promise of something new. a strange, small school, far away from home; from the people you know, the town you know, the life that you’ve lived. far away from the person you are, the person you was, the person you’ve always been.
an escape. that’s all it was.
a way out.
he’s still waiting for your answer, even now, trying to read your thoughts off your face. eyes trailing over every contour. very briefly, you consider dodging the question — but his silent, steady presence squeezes a little honesty out of you.
you want to give him a genuine answer.
”… i guess,” you begin, weighing the words on your tongue. they feel stale, a little awkward, but not dishonest. ”i wanted to stop being me for a bit.”
the words are unexpected, surprising even to your own ears — like your mouth and your mind weren’t quite cooperating, one ahead of the other, one not weighing in on the honest choice. they catch geto off guard.
he looks at you, silently, attempts to dissect your expression; but he doesn’t succeed.
for a second, something flashes in his eyes. a glimmer that you just barely catch, that you can still sense behind his eyelids when they flutter shut. you’re not sure what to call it. recognition, maybe, or something like empathy. a sense of acknowledgement. it’s gone when he opens his eyes.
he doesn’t look at you when he answers.
”… i get that.”
there’s a depth to his words that you’re afraid to uncover. you feel their weight, all the same, glancing up at him, studying his expression, the humid drops of dew that stick to his lashes. and you feel a tug. faint, non-existent, the string between your pinkies —
a growing connection.
(it makes you feel oddly bare.)
all you can give him is a chuckle, a little breathless. ”do you?” you ask, grinning weakly. ”it’s a little melodramatic.”
geto only smiles. silent, comfort personified. there’s no judgement in his eyes, none whatsoever — because he knows exactly what you mean.
fleeing from the past.
it’s a kind of murder, he thinks. a rebirth.
maybe the two of you are similar. similar in the sense that he recognizes the shadow in your eyes, the one he sometimes sees in mirrors; familiar in the sense that you both suffer from that same sickening awareness.
(maybe you want the same thing he wants, what he’s always wanted —
control.)
it’s a realization that creeps up on you, the both of you, slow and steady. a sense of kinship. it envelops you, cradles you close, in the same way molten clouds cover the summer sky.
geto isn’t lying, you can tell. he does get it. you know, just from that tilt of his voice, the way his eyelashes flutter, his absent shifting from one foot to another. and it soothes your worries.
everything is silent, for a bit. you look down at the asphalt, at your own reflection in a puddle, and geto gazes at the bushes of hydrangeas to his right. you feel safe, right next to him, under his umbrella. and he feels content to have you there. your shoulders brush together, for a moment, and it sends a jolt through your heartbeat.
geto inhales a breath.
”by the way —”
”— have you studied for the exam?”
you both still. blurting out the words at the same time, turning to look at each other; sheepishly blinking in the other’s direction.
then he barks out a laugh.
”sorry,” he hums, a sleek smile on his lips. bright and sheepish. ”what was that? the exam?”
”ah — yeah,” you feel heat settle on the back of your neck, crawling up your ears. ”have you, um, studied for it at all?”
geto moves the umbrella from one arm to the other, smoothly directing you to stand on his right instead of his left. guiding you with his hand on your lower back, ghosting the fabric of your clothing. he stretches his free arm, a little stiff.
”yeah,” he exhales. ”not a lot, though.”
”really?” you blink up at him, trying not to blush at how easily he maneuvered you. stupid, stupid heartbeat. ”you strike me as the honour student type…”
geto scoffs. it leaves his lips before he can tug it back. ”satoru said the same thing.”
a breath spills from your lips, almost a chuckle. you’re not sure how to feel about being compared to gojo, of all people, but you’ll let it slide this once. ”well, you just kinda have that vibe.”
now he’s huffing, tethering on the edge of something childish, and your smile grows. you’re seeing him make a lot of new expressions today.
”why, though?” comes a sigh. he must be playing it up, a little — you almost get fooled into thinking he’s pouting. ”is it the hair? i don’t even wear glasses anymore...”
”well —” you pause. ”hold on, you used to wear glasses?”
all you get is an absent hum. he doesn’t notice your wide, shellshocked eyes. ”when i was younger. i got rid of them a couple years back.”
“oh…” you try to imagine it, for a second. he’d look frighteningly good in them. just barely, you manage to keep yourself from saying it out loud. ”i think it’s more just your general personality. like, you’re responsible and polite… or something.”
and geto chuckles; the intersection between a teasing smile and a soft grin. it’s just a little bit ethereal, painted over with the humid summer air. he turns towards you.
”and that makes me an honour student?”
”… okay, maybe not.” you bring a hand up to your hair, fixing it absently. deflating a little. ”you just strike me as intelligent, i guess.”
geto smiles, again, as always. the chuckle that escapes him is faint and fond, and awfully soft, dripping down his lips. ”well, thank you.”
his eyes are warm, burning into yours. all you can do is glance away. you still don’t really understand this sensation — why he’s suddenly so easy to talk to. why he feels like something other than just a classmate, when he looks at you like that.
then again, geto has always been a natural at putting people at ease. maybe that’s why you can’t help but warm up to him, compliantly, the way a child dutifully follows the first butterfly they ever see — it’s a little too pretty to resist.
you want to slip deeper into his world, you realize. you don’t want this moment to end so soon.
”you guys really get along, huh?” you change the subject, speaking slowly, savouring every syllable. there isn’t any rush to get the words out all at once, when you’re with him.
geto blinks, tilting his head.
”hm?”
“you and gojo, i mean.”
a glimmer passes through his eyes, as your query sinks in. ”ah. yeah.” his gaze strays upwards, and a contemplative look settles into his face. he knows what you’re after, what you’re really asking; why are the two of you so close? why do you put up with his antics?
what do you see in him?
he thinks it’s a fair question. it’s not like he hasn’t asked himself the very same thing, before — satoru can be annoying. ignorant, too, and terribly rude. a little prick. when he stole his curry bun yesterday, geto wanted to kill him. spoiled little brat.
(then again, he’s…)
”he’s… well.” geto exhales, a little breathless. tasting the words on his tongue. ”you know how he is — but he’s not a bad guy.”
and it’s true. he really isn’t. satoru is a lot of things; rude and spoiled, cocky and bratty, an expert at ticking everyone off. but there’s a kind of charm, there. an innocence that geto admires.
satoru is childish — because he is a child. a child who knows a lot of things that children shouldn’t know. a child who doesn’t know the most basic of things. satoru doesn’t know how to make friends. he doesn’t know how to ask for help, doesn’t know how to give it. he doesn’t know what cotton candy tastes like, because he’s never tried it before.
his childhood couldn't have been very warm. it definitely wasn’t normal.
is that why he puts up with him, then? out of pity? of course not. the bare thought of it leaves a bad taste in his mouth. he’d never look down on satoru, like that — and he knows he’d hate him for it. if anything, geto thinks that maybe the two of them are close because he doesn’t give him any special treatment. even if satoru wasn’t treated with warmth or love, he was certainly coddled. spoiled. it’s evident, in the way that he acts.
but satoru isn’t a god, and he shouldn’t act like one.
one punch, right across the face; knocking the white-haired boy off his feet. that’s where their friendship began. there were stars in satoru’s eyes, geto thinks, when he looked up at him from the ground. sunglasses fallen off from the impact, blue eyes entirely on display, catching the light of the sun — gleaming with a certain bewilderment. almost amazement. like he didn’t know he could be hit, didn’t know it was possible. the sun shone down on him, illuminating the vague bruising on his cheek, and geto wondered if that was the first punch the boy had ever taken.
it certainly wasn’t a first for him, when satoru lunged at him next —
it was a little juvenile. more than a little deranged. geto isn’t one to throw fists, in the first place — he’s out of practice. the punch he fed satoru might’ve been a little too forceful. he couldn’t help but feel bad, every so slightly, for putting a bruise on that irritatingly pretty face of his.
but it still ended with satoru’s arm around his shoulder, a buzzing voice by his ear, proclaiming them as friends. cheery and bright.
geto couldn’t help but echo the statement.
(satoru is a lot of things.
most of all, he’s really hard to hate.)
geto’s answer brings a smile to your face. ”yeah,” you hum, soft voice breaking him out of his reverie. ”he isn’t.”
he looks at you. silently, a question of his own brewing in his irises — and with you so close, close enough to touch, smiling at him like he’s an old friend… geto can’t help but indulge in his own curiosity.
he tries to appear nonchalant, stealing a glance at you out of the corner of his eye. ”seems like the two of you are getting along better, too.”
”me and gojo?” you blink, surprised. a little flustered. huffing out an amused breath, trying to brush off the bare thought. ”no way.”
geto laughs — it’s a deep sound, a full one. somehow very earnest. you wonder if that’s how his laugh always sounds, whenever gojo’s involved. ”oh, come on. you don’t hate him that much.” a teasing glint blooms in his eyes, as he scrutinizes you. ”or am i wrong?”
you pause. faltering, a little, gaze falling down to the pavement — then to the sky — then to him. and then back to the pavement.
”… i mean…” you attempt to squeeze the words out from within your chest, but you can’t help but feel hesitant. as if gojo could jump out of the bushes at any moment, ready to tease you if you say anything that paints him in an even moderately decent light. ”i don’t… hate him. but he’s still annoying.” a pout slips onto your lips. “he has it out for me, you know.”
geto laughs, again. you note that you’re fond of the sound. ”isn’t that because he likes you, though? he just doesn’t know how to show it. it’s like pulling pigtails.”
”don’t even joke about that,” you scoff, shooting him a scowl. “and that wouldn’t make it any better, even if it was true.”
a fond smile. ”yeah, you’re right.” he opts to dial down on the teasing, shifting into a more sincere tone. ”you do seem more friendly now, though. before it felt like you really hated his guts.”
a hum buzzes in your throat. brows furrowing, as you mull on what to answer with. unsure how you really feel. it’s not like you’re suddenly super close, or anything — but you have gotten friendlier. just by a smidge, but still. you’ve gotten better at putting up with him and his antics, at finding comfort in how open he can be.
after a tiny pause, you speak up.
”… i still don’t really understand him.” you gnaw at the skin of your bottom lip, trapping it between your teeth. “but i think i might be starting to.”
you’re a little embarrassed over the words that fall from your lips, barely above a whisper.
”… he’s not the worst.”
geto smiles, but you don’t see it — gaze still lingering on the droplets that bounce off the pavement. ”i’m glad,” he hums, earnest. ”that guy needs more friends.”
something about his tone of voice urges you to look at him. that smile of his is bright, gleaming in the rain, in the midst of the flowers all around you. a little teasing, a little boyish, but somehow very sincere. you didn’t think you’d get to see it up close.
and you can’t help but chuckle. the raven-haired boy glances over at you, confusion in his eyes.
noticing it, you breathe out a quiet chuckle. ”sorry, it’s just —” a teasing grin smooths over your lips. ”you guys bicker a lot, and you act like he annoys you… but you really care for him, don’t you?”
this time, geto almost stops in his tracks. his eyes widen, slightly, and you’re not sure why he seems surprised — when he always sounds so fond saying satoru’s name, talking about him like they understand each other fully. maybe he didn’t notice it until now.
a moment passes, before he collects himself, clearing his throat and averting his gaze. awfully good at keeping his composure.
(though he fails to fully conceal the flustered look on his face.)
”i wouldn’t go that far,” he mumbles, but it only makes you chuckle again. his lips curl up slightly, at the sound; despite his embarrassment. ”someone’s gotta look out for that idiot.”
”right. of course.”
geto gives you a displeased little look. you bite back a laugh. feeling at ease, by his side — you get the sense that you can trust him, that you could tell him absolutely anything, and he still wouldn't use it against you. it’s a relief.
standing there, under geto’s umbrella, in the shadow of summer, rain obscuring the world — you reach a definitive conclusion.
you want to get to know him. want to see inside his heart, hear more of his thoughts. if you could only step over that gap between you, wriggle your way into his world —
you think you’d be happy.
so, as you walk side by side, narrowly avoiding puddles and breathing in the humid summer air, you try to coax them out of him. little thoughts, bits and pieces of the suguru geto you yearn to meet.
(unbeknownst to you, he’s doing the same.)
you continue to talk. about miniscule things, meaningless things, a comfortable sensation of trust simmering in the air between you. and before you know it, you’ve stepped onto the school grounds, stopping right in front of the dormitory.
”here we are,” geto hums, folding the umbrella and tucking it between his arm and torso. you turn to look him in the eye, taking an absent step away.
”thanks, geto,” you can’t help but smile. ”for letting me walk with you.”
”don’t mention it.” he brushes you off with ease, quick to drag the door open; waiting for you to step inside before following suit. always so accommodating.
for a second, he hesitates. a glimmer of uncertainty, in his eyes, that you miss — stretching out your tired limbs with a shallow groan, enjoying the warm and dry air on your skin.
finally, geto takes the leap.
when he parts his lips, his voice comes out soothing. natural and breathy, floral patterns blooming on his tongue; as silky as jasmine petals. ”you can call me suguru, you know.” he lets the silence linger, for a moment. ”if you want to.”
you turn to look at him, eyes widening, at the sudden offer, and he can’t get a good read on the emotion reflected in them. you seem caught off guard, but he can’t tell if it’s a good or bad thing.
after a moment or two, you fumble for a response.
”oh. um — okay? i will, then.” you shake your head, as if brushing off the hesitance you feel, mustering the courage to imitate his offer. ”in that case, you can call me by my first name, too.”
a brief pause.
”… if you want to.”
geto smiles. it’s laced with relief, hard to notice, impossible to miss. instead of answering with an affirmation, he takes a more teasing approach — unable to resist the temptation.
so he says your name. your first name, dragging the syllables out on his tongue, as if tasting it. trying to get used to the way the letters bend as they come out of his mouth. despite the teasing lilt it carries, the sound is oddly earnest; he pronounces it clearly, like he’s trying to call you to his side. you almost feel compelled to take a step towards him.
geto looks you in the eye, as he calls you by your given name, for the very first time — and you can’t help but grow flustered.
”… suguru,” you echo, for whatever reason. you think your brain may be slightly fried. but it feels right, to say it. suguru.
(what a pretty name.)
suguru smiles at you. you think it’s just a little wider than usual, a little more sincere. almost giddy, if you squint. in the open air, the intimate atmosphere simmers.
finally, you clear your throat, glancing in the direction of your dorm room. a silent que for him to follow.
and he does. leaving the umbrella by the hall, before walking you to your door. his steady, soothing presence sticking to your skin. you’re just about to place your fingers on the doorknob, when a pang of realization hits you — stopping you in your tracks.
”oh — right!”
swiftly, you turn on your heel, facing suguru again. he gazes down at you, bemusement in his eyes. watching as you rummage through the plastic bag hanging off your arm. finally, you find what you were looking for; holding it out towards him.
”here,” you give him a warm smile. ”as thanks.”
suguru accepts it, compliantly, allowing you to slip a pack of gum into his palm. he recognizes the brand, one he favours over others. it helps him, on days he can’t find his appetite.
did you see him chewing it at some point, he wonders? when, though?
maybe you’re always paying attention to the people around you. the way they like their coffee, their favoured flavour of gum. it may be a small kindness, an absentminded one, but suguru thinks that makes it all the more meaningful. a kindness that seeps out of you, that draws him in.
he wants to know more, about you. he really does.
but for now, this is enough. a walk back to your dorm, your shared home, talking and growing closer than before.
it’s a small step, but in the right direction.
the pack of gum stirs a mellow, tender feeling in his chest. all he can do is give you a smile, and a thank you that you’re quick to brush off. then you say your goodbyes, and you close the door behind you — flopping down on your bed with a muffled squeal. a giddy kind of excitement swimming in your veins. because finally, finally, you feel like the gap between you has been dented.
you know what his real laugh sounds like. that the tips of his ears turn pink when he’s embarrassed. you know that he used to wear glasses, that you’re a little more similar than either of you could have assumed.
you know that you’re fond of him. fond of a boy with black hair, who smells of summer and rain and chewing gum. fond of a boy you’ve only scratched the surface of.
on the other side of the door, suguru walks back to his room. with a pep in his step, one that satoru notices — because of course he does — appearing from around the corner with a shit-eating grin.
“oh? what were you doing over there, suguru?”
suguru ignores him. popping a piece of the gum you gave him into his mouth, a flavour of apricot melting on his tongue — he sinks his teeth into it, slowly, feeling his lips curl up into a smile.
it tastes of summer and youth. a memory that both of you will savour, for many years to come.
#geto x reader#geto x you#geto x y/n#suguru geto x reader#suguru geto x you#suguru geto x y/n#geto fluff#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk x yn#jjk fluff#getou x reader#geto suguru x reader
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Monaco Green
Pairing: Lando Norris x fem!reader
Warnings: suicide jokes in relation to a happy relationship? (Yall know what I mean)
Authors note: more Lando!
Requested: Yes/No
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yourusername
📍Monte Carlo, Monaco
liked by user1 user2 and 13,800 others
yourusername took a day-trip away from London to go visit Monaco, bit posher than I’m used to, vlog coming soon xx 💚💚💚
In the meantime, new cooking video is up now, we made pesto pasta! 🍝
load comments…
user1 I’m actually in love with her
user2 she’s so pretty!
user3 who’s behind the camera in the pasta video???
user4 is it her editor???
user5 James??? Nah, he’s American, the guy in the video is British
user6 secret boyfriend???
user7 why Monaco?
yourusername visiting a friend! It was quite nice, might have to consider moving 🤔
user8 no offense but how tf would she afford Monaco rent
user9 yk these influencers and their rich parents
user10 so pretty 🥰
yourusername thank you, love 🫶
user11 I love her phone case 💚💚
user12 “we” made pesto pasta 🤔
user13 I loved the new karting vid!!! James had no chance lol, how r u so good?!
yourusername I had a good instructor haha, helps that James is absolutely abysmal at it
jamesedits that’s rude, we don’t all have experienced go-karters to teach us 😒
user14 I want to be her friend so bad, omg her life seems so cool
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landonorris
📍Monte Carlo, Monaco
liked by jamesedits maxfewtrell and 3,008,996 others
landonorris Monaco green 💚
load comments…
user15 the soft-launch????
user16 who is that??????
user17 not Lando posting his secret girlfriend on a random Tuesday
user18 ooh but she’s got good taste in nails I’ll give her that
user19 and who tf is that then
maxfewtrell ah, bold innit?
landonorris 🤐
user20 wtf is max talking about
user21 all we get is hands????
user22 some Twitter detectives about to figure out who that is just based on the hands i bet my life
user23 and if I told you I know who that is, then what
user24 now how tf do you know that
user23 pure vibes and delusion
user25 who taught this man to soft-launch???
user26 I can tell she’s pretty
user27 NOOOOOOOO
user28 what about our marriage and kids???
oscarpiastri she’s lovely
landonorris you have not met her
oscarpiastri this is your sign to change that
oscarpiastri and from what you’ve told me, she is lovely
landonorris she is
user29 awww I already love her
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TWITTER
INSTAGRAM
yourusername
📍Monte Carlo, Monaco
liked by user1 user2 and 31,998 others
yourusername supposed to be a one day trip but now it’s been three days 😅
Day 1 Monaco vlog is up now! 💚
load comments…
user30 is this the girl that Twitter thread was about????
user31 she has the phone case!!!!
user32 you can’t tell me that the “tour guide” in the vlog isn’t Lando
user33 love that James was so against the sunshine the entire time lmao
jamesedits I’m white and from London, I can’t survive in the sun 😔
user34 I love the green 💚💚💚
user35 is this landos girlfriend????
user36 are yall just harassing this poor girl because she has a popular phone case??!! 😭😭
jamesedits can I go home now
yourusername pls do, you third-wheel too much
user37 third-wheeling???? I sense landooo
user38 are you staying with that friend you mentioned
user39 pretty girl 🤩
user40 if you go to the part of the vlog when they’re walking the circuit and go over the grand hotel hairpin, on my life you can see Lando for a split-second in the background
user41 are you sure that’s him and not James?
user40 James was wearing a black jacket, that guy was wearing like a beige hoodie
user42 I just binged like 20 of her videos because I heard she might be dating Lando and now I’m in love with her 😭😭😭
user43 I’m convinced it’s her just because of the phone case and yall can’t change my mind
jamesedits I had to work overtime to get all that footage cut quickly so you’re welcome
yourusername “work overtime” you are on vacation it’s hardly working
jamesedits don’t police my stress
yourusername 🙄
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yourusername added to their story
landonorris
🤩🤩🤩🤩
yourusername
🫶
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landonorris
📍Monte Carlo, Monaco
liked by yourusername charles_leclerc and 3,006,001 others
landonorris 3 days of Monaco with a guest 💚
load comments…
user44 GREEN AGAIN
user45 and if I told you that phone case girl had that same hat in her Instagram post then what
user46 “three days of Monaco” “supposed to be a day-trip but it’s been three days”
user47 that third picture must be from day 1 because someone’s wearing that same beige hoodie in the back of her day 1 vlog
user48 and the green ny hat???
user49 y/n was wearing green converse on her insta story!!!
user50 AND SHE LIKED!!!!
user51 I recognize those shoessss
user52 this is so cute 😭🫶
oscarpiastri she’s lovely!
landonorris now you can say that
oscarpiastri it was lovely to meet her 🫶
landonorris I’ll tell her you said that
user53 the green aesthetic is so adorable omg I love it so much
user54 LANDO DONT BE SCARED TAG HER
user54 OR POST HER ACTUAL FACE
user54 OR EVEN A STRAND OF HAIR PLEASE LANDO
user55 bathing with a toaster tonight dhmu
user56 wdym my husband has a gf? 😭
user57 what about our kids Lando?? What about the kids?
user58 I’ve never even seen her face but that’s my mom now I don’t make the rules 🤷♀️
——————————————
TWITTER
INSTAGRAM
yourusername
📍Monte Carlo, Monaco
liked by landonorris oscarpiastri and 78,661 others
yourusername Day-trip —> full-time stay
More Monaco vlogs to come, then 😅
Monaco day 1 vlog (Lando’s version) is up now, thank you to James for re-including all the clips of him that he'd previously cut out 🫶
load comments…
user59 AWWWWWWW
user60 where’s the user who guessed this from the start
user61 James I going through it
jamesedits it’s bad enough I had to scrub through all the clips of them being lovey-dovey but then I had to look at all of them again to put them back in the vlog
jamesedits and NOW she’s gonna put these clips in EVERY VIDEO! THEYRE SO GROSS!
user62 oh my god poor James 😭
user63 somebody get James a pay raise
yourusername don’t listen to him, he’s like a dog, he’ll act sad to strangers but in reality he gets treated perfectly fine and gets fed on time every day, he doesn’t need any more treats
jamesedits I don’t appreciate being compared to a dog
landonorris dw about it mate, you’d be a nice little yorki
jamesedits 🤨
user64 LANDO!
user65 they both look so good im frothing at the mouth
landonorris glad I could convince you to stay
yourusername you’re very convincing
user66 sleeping on train tracks tonight
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landonorris
📍Monte Carlo, Monaco
liked by yourusername maxfewtrell and 5,000,881 others
landonorris might have to get her a different phone case…💚
Tagged: yourusername
load comments…
user67 SHE GOT A TAG!!!!
user68 Y/N!!!!!
user69 awww they’re adorable 🥰
user70 I’ve followed y/n for years and it’s so nice to see her so happy 😭
user71 HES PESTO PASTA GUY
user72 knowing it’s him makes it make sense as to why he never actually cooks in the video
user73 man moved to Monaco and still found an English girl
user74 I wish my rich athlete boyfriend would convince me to move in with him in his Monaco home… 😞
user75 I’m in love with both of themmmmm
maxfewtrell she made the main page! And you can see her face! Congrats mate!
landonorris 😐���😐
maxfewtrell seriously though, happy 4 u
landonorris thanks max
user76 now I need to know where she got the phone case
yourusername wildflower!
user76 omg I wasn’t expecting a reply! Tysm!
yourusername 💚
user77 I’ve never been more interested in a relationship
user78 HARD-LAUNCH
yourusername 💚💚💚
landonorris 💚💚💚
user79 oh my god they’re so perfect
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@casperlikej @evie-119
#scheduled#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 x female reader#f1 x y/n#f1 x you#f1 smau#lando norris x female reader#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris fluff#lando norris fanfic#lando norris x reader#lando x reader#lando imagine#lando norris imagine
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IDK WHAT TO TITLE THIS??? Just read
I think by creating countless amounts of posts to help people reach the state of shifting or enter the void state is low key pointless
Because why do I have to continue to tell you
A bunch of people I’ll never actually talk to
Irl
How to do something we were all created and born TO DO??
You’re just read this and then proceed to not do it anyway
The reason you’re on here is actually why you “can’t do it”
It’s not that you can’t
You won’t
Because you’re procrastinating but not only are you procrastinating you’re also
Trying to figure out how to do something
You’ve always known what to do
I read somewhere some ppl can’t enter the void
Because it was scientifically proven that we all have different parts of brains that’ll allow it or something I don’t remember but google it
I think that’s weird
Because the void state is literally conscious
Every single human being has consciousness
And we can all access it through meditation hypnosis etc
Why some ppl enter it more easily
Is because they don’t overthink it most ppl look at it as a “oooh I wanna try it”
When you’re excited to try something you don’t over complicate it or assume it’s not gonna work
Even if you do you’re still too excited to try it to care
it’s important that if you’ve already discovered the loa void state and shifting
You should continue to believe in it
But the actions matter just as much as the intentions
Your actions shouldn’t be wavering like
Is it real?
But then saying you believe it is
Figure it out
Do you believe in it or not?
Stop confusing your subconscious mind
Now back to what I was saying earlier
You keep treating it like a chore or a job
When you finally lay down to meditate you think
“What’s takin so long?”
Babe
Your impatience is the reason you’re not getting it
The whole point is for relaxation but since you’ve all put it on a pedestal
With the manifesting
You act as if
It’s a wish granter
It’s not
You are the reason you get your desire
You could get in the void rn but you’d only get your desires if YOU say your affirmations
Stop
Waiting to enter the void
If you have this mindset it’s not gone happen
Think of it as a
You’re setting the intention and just vibing
That’s why my method with the music works so well
Because I don’t overthink with music on
Music keeps me awake mentally and certain songs keep me relaxed physically
Plus it’s a good energy then just depending on a subliminal or something
It’s not doing it for you
My method plus ppl on here literally getting in the void
With no background noise is proof that subliminals are just guiding you to a destination you were already going to reach on your own
So what to take from this post
1. Stop depending on subliminals it’s fine to use them but thinking it’s gonna get your results is putting power into something that isn’t as powerful as you
2. Procrastination is going to be the cost of a life you could be living The more you linger on this looking for the answers you already know the longer you’ll be living in a world you are desperately trying to escape from congrats you’ve got a Dr you can daydream and escape this reality mentally but what’s the fun in that? That life you keep fantasizing is real and the universe knows how bad you want it so why fantasize? Go there
3. Why are you wondering how ppl get in the void easily? Simply just stop thinking about it so much literally just meditate think affirm whatever don’t even think of the void but still have that intention in your mind you wanna move your body? Why? You hate this reality you wanna block out all the physicality it actually feels so good to just be in a moment of peace I’m telling y’all the key to entering the void shifting etc other OOB experiences is literally just stop paying attention
You know so many ppl with adhd
Or other neurodivergent disorders think it’s so difficult to focus
But I remember years ago I accidentally entered the void without knowing what it was
I was so sleepy I laid down
Got distracted by a thought
And literally it went black for like five seconds and I felt nothing
So literally just stop paying attention
Affirm
If you want
Set the intention count whatever
Or you could just set the intention and just think
Of literally anything
That doesn’t cause physical reactions like a funny thought you’d laugh at
But just pretend you’re dreaming like how you normally would
Which brings me to my method
THE DREAM METHOD:
You could pretend to be dreaming
Like if you can’t visualize it still use your sense
Image your dreaming
And in that dream you’re living your dream life or you could “dream” that you’re in the void
However you want your void to look
By not moving you’re tricking your body into thinking you’re asleep
And by pretending to be dreaming
You’re tricking your mind into thinking
You’re both sleeping and dreaming
This will make you either dream Forreal
Or you could use this to get in the void
When or if you feel symptoms
By the way
Those floaty etc symptoms are actually signs that you’re astral projecting because shifting your awareness is a mind thing
NOT an outer body experience
So if you feel floaty dizzy spinning etc
You are astral projecting
BUT
You can use astral projection to shift and to enter the void
You’re Welcome
Also P.S but have you ever zoned out and stared at something til your vision got all blurry and background noises get fuzzy and whatever you’re focused on is the only think you can subconsciously focus on?
Yeahhh it’s a trance
Try doing this while meditating with your eyes open then close them and keep doing it
What ever you were focus on
Close your eyes
Set the intention
Affirm for a bit
Breathe then
Imagine something
Anything you’d want
And pretend to dream
By just visualizing or thinking or using your senses
You could put on an instrumental and imagine your doing a music video
If you feel symptoms just remember
Nothings physically happening to you
So why focus on it?
If someone saw you you’d still be in bed
Not moving
Itchy feelings mean your body is feeling as if you’re awake
There’s no actual physical symptoms of entering the void
Because it’s not really an out of body experience it’s you shifting your awareness has nothing to do with your body
Since you’re shifting to the 4D
The 4D is not physical
I may have mentioned symptoms in my previous posts I don’t remember I’m not a hypocrite I just learn and get more educated
But no matter
Take this how you want
And even if I could help
I could never get you into the void state
It’s literally me trying to tell YOUR subconscious mind to do something you already know how to do
Like cmon
Also
You don’t need the void to shift
Trust me there’s a gagillion methods
Another also
You don’t even need a method just lay down don’t move
Trust me weird shit will happen
#law of assumption#void state#law of attraction#void#law of manifestation#manifesting#manifesation#loassumption#loassblog#subliminals#getyourdreamlife#neville goddard#loablr#loa blog#alpha waves#theta waves#shifting blog#shiftinconsciousness#reality shift#reality shifting#manifesting affirm and persist#robotically affirming#desired life#dream life#desired reality#meditating#manifestation#law of the universe#affirm and persist#astral projection
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bother figures * fem!driver
being the designated baby sister of the grid by default is never as easy as you think it would be
pairings: alex albon x fem!driver, max verstappen x fem!driver, george russell x fem!driver, lando norris x fem!driver
warnings: ugh annoying men
notes: this is hardly funny but like i've had to take inspiration from my bother-less life rn so i'm like rly going through it rn LMFAO and it's almost 5am here but as far as i'm concerned, it is night time somewhere so teCHNICALLY i'm not late to an update!
(series masterlist) | (📂 the rookie season)
in the almost empty room, she sits in the corner seat as she taps away on her phone a message to reply to her siblings' group chat. she had arrived early for the driver's briefing and decided to take solace in the corner with a cup of hot chocolate.
she was enjoying the peace and serenity with the soft chatter in the background as she tried to lock herself in for the race weekend. that was until she felt a presence looming behind her with an aura she couldn't possibly ignore.
she slowly lifts her head up with a mean glare. she turns her head and meets max's blue eyes and sly grin. "what'cha doin'?"
she puts her phone on her lap as a scowl replaces her dead expression. "what do you want?"
"what are you doing?"
"does it hurt you when you see me and like... not do anything to annoy me?"
"yes, actually. i like talking to you."
"i just wanted to talk to ciara."
"now you can talk to me."
"but i don't really feel like doing that."
"why not? i'm here in front of you and not behind a phone screen. where's ciara?" he looks around, then at her with a beaming smile. "oh, would you look at that? not here."
"because she isn't an f1 driver."
"still not here to talk to you and provide you the joys of interacting with somebody face to face."
"max."
"(y/n)."
"times like these i remember you've got a younger sister."
"what's that got to do with anything?"
"you've mastered the practice of being annoying growing up, obviously. you're such a pro at it."
"how can you say that?" max cries, hand on his chest to feign hurt over her words. "i'm not annoying. please take that back!"
"you realise you made me stop my conversation with my lovely sisters because you saw me sitting alone."
max reaches out and pinches her cheek, grinning when blood rushes to her cheeks. "you were just looking a little lonely. just wanted to make you feel a little accommodated to, that's all."
she stares at him, lips pressed together. "okay, that's actually pretty sweet. i kinda feel bad now.”
“and you should!” max frowns, folding his arms over his chest. he leans back into his seat and rests one leg over the other. “you’re mean, you know?”
“i’m an oldest sister.”
“i’m an oldest brother.”
“i have three younger siblings that made me wanna shave my head bald.”
“that’s kinda crazy.”
“i know,” she sighs tiredly. but she smiles slightly. “but it’s kinda nice. with oscar and logan taking over those responsibilities growing up, we never had a moment of boredom at home.”
“cute!” max smiles. “if i lived with you growing up, you might’ve actually run away for good.”
“i could run away for good now if you’d like.”
“seb wouldn’t like that.”
“you’d have to deal with it. i’ll leave a note on my team’s fridge with your name on it.”
“you need to put the reason underneath. if not, your team will think you’re just naming the most handsomest driver on the grid,” max shakes his head in disappointment. “don’t wanna give off the wrong idea, you know?”
“if you say ‘handsomest’, it doesn’t need a ‘most’ before it,” she says, lips parted slightly at the atrocious grammar. if there’s one thing she can’t stand, it’s most definitely the reigning world champion making simply grammar mistakes. “you should get more sleep.”
“i do! i slept like 10 hours last night!”
“somehow i find that hard to believe with the bags under your eyes.”
“what are you two bickering about?” a hand lands itself on the back of her chair. carlos stands next to her with one hand on his hip. “i could hear you from the hallways.”
“damn, you should really keep it down, max,” she chuckles, sending him a shocked look before she clasps her hands together and rests it on her stomach. “you’re too loud.”
“i’m sure he meant you. you like… swallowed a mic as a kid,” max scoffs. he looks up at carlos. “tell me she was louder than me.”
carlos sighs. “you were loud on the same level, i believe.”
"see? i told you."
"you're moving in with logan?" alex's jaw drops, the tiktok video no his phone left to play on repeat as the younger girl dropped the news that logan's moving into her apartment. "mate, what?"
she looks up at him with a confused stare. "what?"
"i thought you said you didn't want people talking about you like that?" alex asks, raising an eyebrow. "people will definitely talk if you move in with a man."
she presses her lips together. "you've got a point, i suppose. but logan's my best friend. we've been talking about moving in together forever! since i was 15!"
"i'm just looking out for you, kid. you should really think this through," alex sighs as he slumps his shoulders. of course, he knows just how close she and logan are on a day-to-day basis. but people tend to be quite ruthless with women and he just can't see this going any other way. "you know how people are."
she sighs, shaking her head. "i don't know. i just don't think people would pay attention to that aspect of my life. i still deserve to make decisions that wouldn't be at risk of scrutiny, right?"
she takes a step forward towards alex. she hadn't exactly thought of the public implications that this would cause her. all she knew was that they'd talked about this for years and were ecstatic when logan shyly brought up their conversation from years ago.
"that's the basic that we all hope for," alex frowns. "but you know how people are. you've seen how they treat you just being here. imagine the chaos."
"maybe i'll just keep it under wraps and hope for the best," she suggests with a small smile on her face. "that could work, right? i don't wanna have to put down something i spent forever talking about."
"if you can keep it under wraps, i applaud you," alex smiles, slinging an arm around her shoulders. "and i thought you've had enough of men - why are you still moving in with one?"
"to save money, really," she smiles. "and with kidnapper and stubby at home... i think living with another person is best."
"but doesn't logan like dogs more?"
"yeah, but kidnapper's taken a very weird liking to him. he doesn't wanna admit, but i know logan really likes kidnapper a lot."
"typical logan, really."
"you'd be surprised how much feelings that loser's holding in."
"oh?" alex smiles mischievously. "tell me more?"
"nice try," she scoffs with an eye roll. "i'm not spilling the beans about logan's love life. that's lore you've got to unlock the longer you race with him. just hope he's feeling friendly enough to share, yes?"
"so true," alex frowns. "but what if he's not friendly enough? means you are my only source for material to piss him off with. so, 'fess up!"
"can't betray my best friend like that, i fear," she frowns. though, her smile grows slowly. "but i can be bribed."
a scowl carves her face as she stares at the roll-in whiteboard with pictures held up against it with sesame street magnets. she sinks into the plastic chair she's given and tilts her head at the men gathered around her.
"and that's why i think you should get the same car as me," lando says simply, recapping the marker in his hands. he turns to her with a proud smile after his presentation.
her lips part. "so that we can matchy and..."
"and fuel rumours," lando repeats. "i'm involved in too little drama this year. it's always 'no wins' this, and 'no podiums' that... i want more."
"that's not a very good argument," she answers slowly, confusion contorting her face that almost makes alex laugh. "i said that i want an easy car, not a supercar. i've made that clear to almost everyone on the grid, yes?"
"yeah, but like," lando whines, throwing his head back as he stomps a foot into the ground. "seriously? you can't do this one thing for me? i'm asking you a favour!"
"to spend big money on a supercar i have to drive like it's made of glass!" she laughs dryly, hands thrown in the air in disbelief. she looks around at the men that have forcefully pulled her out of her garage and put her in this private room, in this plastic chair when she could've been taking a power nap. "is this what i'm here for? you lot are trying to convince me to finally purchase a car?"
"as per logan's request," alex shrugs, sipping on his juice box. "he said you've been putting it off all year. the season's about to end."
"and you listened to that nonce?" she cries, pinching the bridge of her nose. "you guys are absolutely unbelievable. i can't believe i'm wasting my time here!"
george, sitting next to her with a picture in hand, points at the whiteboard timidly. "i really put in a lot of thought about a car you should get," he says softly, looking slightly disappointed that she's caught on a lot faster than they predicted. "can i at least show it to you? i don't have to present."
"aw, george," she sighs, shaking her head. "it's not another supercar, is it?"
"it's not, i promise!" he perks up with a small smile on his face. he turns to lando with a small scowl. "only lando did this presentation with his best interests in mind. alex and i took the task seriously - just hear us out!"
she looks between george and alex, contemplating if the brit is telling the truth. instead of getting up like she had initially planned, she leans back into her seat. "fine. if it's anything like lando's, i'm leaving immediately. i don't care who has yet to present."
"but this ferrari looks so pretty," charles frowns, turning the picture in his hand to show it to her. "it's matte black and all. i thought we could match."
"that is also a supercar."
"he's presenting last, so i really don't care what he says," george mutters, shoving lando away from the whiteboard. he picks up a big bird magnet and pastes his picture between lando and max's proposal. "so, i think you should get this super cute toyota car."
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Hello, bestie, your writing is fucking amazing, i adore you so much, lovie 💕❤️😍
Could i ask a request for 141, LV and Konig, where THEY send reader a nude photo as a tease, pretty smutty too, please? 👀😍 Thank you, sweetie ❤️
141 + König Sending Reader A Nude Photo
Warnings: smut, p in v sex, afab! Reader, oral f! Receiving
Note: I’ll be doing a second version with Alejandro, Nikolai, Rodolfo and Grave☺️❤️
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Simon Ghost Riley-
Simon felt ridiculous. He'd never sent a nude photo in his life, and thought the idea was frankly a bit silly. But Johnny had told him that this was something that people just “did” in relationships, especially when one of the partners was away for an extended period of time.
He closed himself in his office, locking the door behind him before sitting down in one of the chairs.
“Better be right about this, Johnny.” Simon huffed, moving to unbutton his pants. Now, Simon would be lying if the thought wasn’t intriguing, his mind filling with possibilities of just how you’d react to getting such a provocative picture of him.
He pulled his semi hard cock out, fisting it a few times before taking out his phone. If he thought the idea was ridiculous before, it was nothing compared to how he was feeling now. He struggled with getting the right angle, frankly feeling quite awkward as he snapped a photo and sent it off to you.
He debated getting back up, and going back to his bunk before his phone chimed a few minutes later. He looked down, to find a picture of you, your body donning the black lingerie set he bought you before his deployment, and your bottom lip tucked in between your teeth.
“Bloody fuckin’ hell.” Simon cursed under his breath, his cock now rock hard in his pants. He palmed at himself through his pants lazily, his eyes glued to your figure on his phone. “Gonna be the death of me.”
He quickly dialed your number, pressing his phone to his ear as his hand moved back toward his fully hard member. “Lovie- you look good in that set.”
“Thought you’d like that. That picture was quite the surprise, Si.” You gave a breathy chuckle, and Simon could’ve sworn he heard the faint buzzing of your vibrator in the background.
“You touching yourself, babe?” Simon asked, his cock twitching at the thought. “You touching yourself to the picture of my cock?”
You gave a breathy moan in reply, causing Simon’s eyes to squeeze shut as he pulled himself back out, and began to pump himself at a steady pace.
“Let me see, kitten.” He ordered, and who were you to deny his request?
Your picture came a moment later, your favorite vibrator shoved firmly inside of you, and Simon could clearly tell from the picture that you were soaked.
“Good fucking girl. That’s my girl. Go on and make yourself cum on the phone with me, I want to hear it.”
Your moans filled his ears, as Simon struggled to keep the phone steady in his hands, his eyes glued to your recent picture. His right hand was pumping at his cock furiously, your soft mewls driving him closer to the edge.
“Just you wait, princess. When I get home I’m gonna make you cum in every room of that fuckin’ house.” Simon groaned, his orgasm nearing quickly. “Can’t wait to feel that pretty little pussy cum all around my cock.
His vulgar words drove you to your edge, a loud squeak emitting from your lips as your release racked your body- causing you to scream out your lovers name.
Simon fell over the edge, his cock pulsing as thick ropes of cum flew onto his abdomen. “Fuck. My name sounds so good like that. Such a good girl for me.”
“You better have meant what you said Simon.” You teased, your voice breathless as you regained your composure. “As much as I loved the picture, nothing compares to the real thing.”
Simon cleared his through, a dark chuckle resounding from his chest. Of course he fucking meant it- after all, Simon’s a man of his word.
Johnny Soap MacTavish-
Johnny was dying. He'd been without sex for months, and he was dying for any sort of release. He wouldn’t be home to you, his pretty little pet in at least another few weeks, and he was nearly about to burst from the pent up sexual frustration.
The saved pictures of you in his phone had done little to satiate his needs, and he decided to take a different approach this time.
He closed himself in one of the private bathrooms on base, and wasted no time in yanking off his pants. His cock was already semi hard, as crude thoughts of you had been swirling in his mind all day.
He gave his member a few pumps, before snapping a picture of himself in the full sized mirror in front of him, and sending it to you without any accompanying message. Now all he had to do was wait for your reply.
He smiled as not more than a minute after he sent the photo, he got a notification on his phone that you were face timing him.
“Bonnie.” He answered, making sure only his face was visible when he answered the video call. “Is everything alright?”
“You’re a fucking tease, you know that right?” You groaned, settling yourself on yours and Johnnys shared bed. “An absolute tease.”
“It’s only fair lass. How many times have you sent me pictures of yourself, knowing damn well I couldn’t do anything about it.” Johnny argued, getting himself more comfortable on the lid of the toilet. “Go on, show me what that picture did to you.”
He watched intently as you held your phones camera away from you, and began to slowly strip away at your clothes. Johnny licked his lips eagerly as you removed your panties, leaving yourself completely bare to his awaiting eyes.
He turned his camera to face his fully hard cock, and began to pump himself, his eyes never leaving the phone in his other hand.
“Let me see how wet you are, baby.” Johnny cooed, his eyes glued to the screen as you brought your phone closer to your pussy. He nearly came right there as he watched you drag a finger up your soaked cunt, the wet noises clearly audible through the phone. “Oh fuck me.”
You gave a delectable whimper, causing Johnny to fist at his cock faster than before. “Miss you Johnny.”
“I know, lass. Be a good girl for me and show me just how much that pussy misses me. I want to watch you come undone with your fingers.”
You spread your legs further for him, giving him the perfect view of your glistening cunt, and began to play with yourself, as soft moans began to emit from your lips.
“That’s it, keep going. I want to see everything.”
John Price-
John was simply too old for this. He’d heard the men on base talking about sending nudes to their significant others, as a way to keep their sex lives spiced up away from home- but John never once had partaken in such a thing before. Would you even like it?
The alcohol swirling in his system told him that you would, and before he could second guess his decision, he made his way to his office, making sure to lock the door behind him.
He sat himself comfortably in his chair, before pulling his length out of his pants, stroking it lazily as he pulled up his messages with you.
He knew you’d be home, probably in bed right now- otherwise he’d never have entertained the thought of doing this. He could very well just go home, but he knew if he did the stack of paperwork would never get done, but gods could he use the distraction.
He held his cock firmly in his hand, feeling a bit silly as he snapped a picture, and sent it over to you without second thought.
To say you were surprised to see the picture that popped up on your phone would be an understatement. You loved John dearly, but never would you have thought he’d send you a picture like this. Not that you were complaining.
Biting your lip, you snapped a picture of yourself- Your cleavage pouring out from the top of one of John’s white dress shirts.
John felt his cock twitch in his palm as he opened up the photo message, and instantly typed out a reply.
Get in your car, and drive over to my office, NOW.
~~~~~
You barely made it through the door of his office before he had you bent over his desk, your leggings ripped down exposing your bare bottom half to him.
“Gods I am a lucky fucking man.” John groaned, his fingers immediately going to toy with your already soaked folds. “Does my sending you pictures of my cock make you this wet?”
All you could do was moan in reply, as his thick fingers plunged inside of you, pumping in and out of you at a vigorous pace. He paused his movements, clearly unsatisfied by your lack of verbal reply.
A harsh slap came down on your ass, causing you to cry out. John only chuckled at your mewls. “I asked you a question, I expect an answer.”
“Yes. Fuck yes John.” You cried out. Seemingly satisfied by your answer, John pulled his fingers out of your core, before landing a playful slap to your cunt.
“Then he daddy’s good girl and cum around his cock, yeah? Show me just how much you enjoyed it.” He cooed in your ear, before plunging his length inside you without warning.
Needless to say, this won’t be the last time you receive a photo from John.
König-
Sorry, you wanted him to what? Surely he didn’t read your message correctly. König looked back down at his phone, his eyes scanning over your most recent message about a half dozen times. You wanted… a picture of his cock?
König looked around the room shyly, somehow thinking the men 10 feet across from him knew what was being asked of him.
He gulped audibly as you sent through another text, this time a picture of you, in one of your more revealing sets of pajamas. König could feel himself grow hard and his pants, and practically sprinted to one of the private bathrooms on base.
Once locked inside, he wasted no time in ripping down his pants, breathing a sigh of relief as his painfully hard cock sprung free from its confinements.
Though he knew he was alone, König couldn’t help but look around the small bathroom, his cheeks burning crimson red as he snapped a picture of himself, before sending it off to you.
He honestly planned on getting up and walking out of the bathroom, never to think of this moment again, before his phone went off again.
A video came through, causing König’s brain to malfunction completley. You were playing with yourself, as soft moans of König’s name left your lips.
Königs legs acted on their own, prompting him to walk back over to the toilet and sit down on it, his cock making its way to his hand once more as he began to stroke it.
He had to bite his lip, hard enough to draw blood to prevent his cries of pleasure from escaping his lips. He felt so dirty. He knew men were right outside the bathroom, but in that moment all he could focus on was how good your pussy looked in that video- and how much he wanted it to be his fingers playing with it instead of yours.
Another ping of his phone came- another video from you. König eagerly watched as you came undone, cumming around your fingers as his name continued to spill from your lips.
Königs other hand was shaking, his orgasm rapidly approaching as his eyes remained glued to the video stuck in a loop on his phone. He held the phone, camera facing his cock as he pressed the record button. If you were going to treat him with videos, the least he could do we repay the favor.
Kyle Gaz Garrick-
You were a tease, through and through. It was one of the many things Kyle loved about you. But you’d been a devious little brat lately. You’d developed this habit this week, of sending him scandalous pictures of yourself, at various points of the day.
It was sending Kyle to a frenzy. Anytime he received the pictures it took everything in him not to run to the bathroom to bust a nut- but the timing was never convenient.
Now, now it was his turn to return the favor. Knowing he was being put on leave earlier than usual (unbeknownst to you) he decided to have a little fun of his own.
Before leaving the base, he stopped in one of the bathrooms, taking a quick picture of his semi hard cock, before tucking it back in his pants with a smile. Without second thought he hit the send button, before hopping in his car for the two hour drive home.
~~~~
You blew up his phone at least a dozen times on his drive. Kyle was never one to spontaneously send pictures like that, and it had a heat pooling between your legs.
The worst part was, he was blatantly ignoring your texts. He knew damn well what he was doing. Frustrated beyond belief, you took matters into your own hands.
~~
Kyle arrived home later that afternoon, the shit eating smirk from earlier never once leaving his lips.
He raced up the stairs, being as quiet as he could, and carefully opened the door to your shared bedroom. The sight he was met with had Kyle nearly creaming his pants right there.
You were splayed out on the bed, fully naked, your freshly painted nails stuffed firmly inside your core, desperately trying to find your release.
“Need some help?” Kyle called, a dark chuckle escaping his lips as he leaned against the door frame.
You jolted up, your eyes as wide as saucers as you pulled your fingers from your pussy. “Kyle!”
“Oh do continue, I’m quite enjoying the show.” He replied, licking his lips as his eyes remained glued to your sopping core.
“You’re a tease. I didn’t know you were coming home.” You huffed in frustration, your momentum from earlier long gone.
He grabbed your legs, firmly pulling you to the edge of the bed, and chuckled at the squeal that escaped your lips. “How’s it feel to be on the receiving end?”
Before you could reply, Kyle’s tongue found its way to your soaked folds, swirling and flicking rapidly at your sensitive bud.
“Now be a good girl and take exactly what I’m willing to give you.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N: ahhhh sorry this didn’t come together as well as I’d liked!
#simon riley imagine#simon ghost riley x reader#simon riley x reader#cod imagine#mw2 imagine#ghost x reader#ghost mw2#konig x reader#konig imagine#konig mw2#kyle gaz garrick#johnny soap mactavish#soap imagine#soap smut#soap x reader#price x reader#price smut#price imagine#simon ghost riley mw2#simon riley x you#simon riley smut#simon riley#konig call of duty#konig smut#konig cod#könig x reader
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would've, could've, should've | aaron hotchner
warning(s): one whole curse word, smoking, stunning amount of fluff and a little bit of action
GIF by @littlecarmine
part one
part two
author's note: Sorry for the delay, hope it was worth it! I also want to thank the sweet anon for the ask with the Robert Siken poem, which I included here. Next part will be straight-up filthy smut, so stay tuned, fellow sluts.
Follow me @MadeofLilies on Ao3 and let me know if you want to be tagged here.
-.-.-
You don’t see much of each other for the next couple of days. Aaron is on autopilot, avoiding any chance to be alone with you. The rest of the team unknowingly act as a buffer and all he has to do is not look at you during work hours, keep the door to his office shut to not hear your laughter.
It’s a relief when you and Morgan are called to testify in court for a case. You’re somewhere far away for the day, where he knows you’re safe and he can go back to pretending nothing has changed.
The problems start when he’s not being kept busy.
How much paperwork can one person do?
The stars align oddly in his favor and he’s into calls or meetings until long after everyone else has gone home. When ten pm rolls around, he finally calls it quits but sees no point in leaving in a hurry. It’s past Jack’s bed time, it’d be cruel to wake him up now and carry him back home when tomorrow’s Sunday. If all goes well, he can pick him in the morning and they’ll get to spend the day together.
His finger is hovering over Jessica’s number when he spots your name in his call logs. It’s silly and childish, but he hasn’t thought of you in a couple of hours and God.
Deep down, he knows he’s been incredibly unfair to you. He had to. Had to tell himself it was something outside of him causing him torment. An obstacle to overcome, a distraction to ignore. He had to act as if you were forcing your way into his life in order to be able to put up walls, but what have you really done except exist near him? He is the one to blame for allowing it to grow beneath his skin; succumbing to his need for some sort of intimacy when he could have -should have- nipped this at the bud a very long time ago. He recognized it within himself the other day, when he realized he could have -should have- kissed you.
But nothing is healed with a kiss. Only new grievances arise.
It’s where you go from there that matters and he finds himself unable to guide or be guided.
Where do you go from here?
When he decides to feed his insomnia with a cup of late-night coffee, he is yet again reminded of you. So, he calls, but you don’t answer and he pours another, completely indifferent to the idea of sleep.
It’s getting too late to be here, even by his standards. He tries calling again, but, no answer. He gathers his stuff to leave and there is a horrible feeling at the pit of his stomach when he settles inside the car. It’s only eleven and you always say you never sleep this early.
Another call, this time to Emily, who miraculously, picks up.
“Hello? Hotch?”
There is a deafening buzz in the background; loud voices and music blasting.
Aaron apologizes for the late hour and tries to be discreet when he asks about you. Says he needs to go over something about a case file but you won’t answer his calls and he got worried.
“Yeah, she’s fine, she’s right here with me, but it’s a little hard to get her right now. Is it urgent?”
“Uh, no, don’t bother her. Is everyone else there too?”
“Not everyone, just the two of us, Garcia and Morgan. Do you need them as well?”
You didn’t invite him, why would you? He would have never said yes.
“No, it’s okay. I’ll figure it out tomorrow.”
“Sorry, sir, I can’t make out much with all this noise. We’re at the ‘Matter’ if you need us. I’ll tell the guys to call you as soon as they can, okay? Have a good night.”
So, he drives two miles a little before midnight to come sit outside ‘Matter’, which is apparently a very busy nightclub downtown, half a mile away from the nearest parking spot he could find.
He doesn’t really know why he came.
He can’t come in and join you. Can’t ask for you.
They probably wouldn’t even let him in while dressed like this.
It’s very unclear what the next step is.
He knows it’s pointless to call you again when you’re probably too busy dancing and drinking with a great many people who are not him. Morgan has some trouble keeping his hands to himself when he drinks.
He sits on the curb of the street, cracks open the pack of cigarettes he snack out of the car’s glove compartment, always hidden below the insurance papers. Astoundingly loud music plays every time the doors to the club open and people come out stumbling, kissing sloppily and dragging each other away.
He just wants to see you and put this horrible feeling inside him to rest.
“No fucking way.”
He jolts at the sound of your voice and throws away the cigarette, putting it out with his shoe before he turns to see you standing outside the club. You approach timidly until you can be sure it’s him and when you step closer to the streetlight, he can really see you. The clothes you could never wear to work, the shoes you apparently spend all your money on. You’re beautiful.
He can’t possibly move until you’re sat beside him. For the first time in what seems like forever, now that he’s grown so used to it, you keep a very respectable distance between your bodies.
“You didn’t have to throw it away; I already saw you and,” you pick up the abandoned carton from the sidewalk and almost laugh at how immaculate it looks just having been opened, “I have so many questions. Since when do you smoke?”
His voice is quiet, unamused.
“Almost never.”
You look at him curiously and he thinks you would make a great interrogator simply by the way you make everyone around you spill their souls out if it will satisfy you.
“Sometimes when I’m very stressed.”
You hum, “I never would have guessed that.”
He laughs to himself and looks at his hands.
“Yeah, I’ve been doing a lot of things that are not typical of me lately.”
You help yourself to a cigarette and he cups his hand over yours when the breeze makes it too hard to light up.
“Is that because of me? Am I a bad influence?”
“No. It’s me, I’m the common denominator.”
You hum again and smile at him teasingly in an attempt to lighten the mood, “Breakthrough.”
“So, this is what therapy is like?”
He wants to thank you, for always trying to make things as easy as possible for him. You open the door and difficult as it may seem, all he really has to do is walk through it.
“No, of course not. I wouldn’t smoke in session.”
“Oh good.”
You’re sitting closer again and Aaron doesn’t know how. He doesn’t think either of you moved. He keeps his eyes on the road in front of him, glances at you only from the corner of his eye. Your perfume mingles with the smoke of the cigarette and it’s all a haze to him.
“Why are you not inside?”
“I needed a breath; it was very loud and packed in there… and I finally saw your calls.”
He hums, unable to find anything else to say.
“Why are you here?
“I don’t know.”
He knows that is not a good enough of an answer.
“I always have this terrible feeling that something is going to happen to you.”
Your shoulder touches his and he can admire the smoothness of it, focus on each mark there to avoid the dreaded eye contact.
“Do you think that fear is reasonable, or is it rooted in something else?’
His eyes shut tightly, “Don’t do that, please. Don’t talk to me like I’m a subject.”
“You use your ‘agent tone’ all the time outside of work.”
His voice deepens, “I am aware.”
Heavy breathing.
“I’m sorry I did all that and then backed out at the last minute.”
“It’s alright. I think I knew you would.”
“See, that’s even worse.”
You look at his suit, the wrinkles that have formed in the shirt underneath from the hours of wear.
“Did you come here straight from the office?”
A sigh, “Yeah.”
You nod your head in understanding and move to put out what’s left of the cigarette.
“I’m alright. I’ve got the others too; they’ll take me home. You can relax now.”
“I don’t think I ever can.”
You don’t know what to say really. If what he needs is time, you can give it, but he seems undecided as well when he picks up your hand.
“I think I’m scared of what will happen once the line is crossed.”
A confession.
That, you did not expect.
“Aside from the complications at work, I just,” his hand rubs gently on the spot your watch has left its mark, “I have proved time and time again that I can’t handle any relationship beyond professionalism and once we stop being just colleagues, I will lose you completely from my life.”
“Do you think that line has not been crossed already?”
He laughs quietly.
You can both feel the bouncer looking at you and Aaron is suddenly aware of how vulnerable he is right now.
“I guess it has.”
You’re both quiet for a little while.
“I have to go back inside now, or they’ll start getting worried.”
He looks like he’s about to say something, but no words leave his mouth.
“Don’t worry, I won’t tell them you were here.”
That hurt. You know it, but what else was there to say?
“Maybe tomorrow you’ll know.”
You give his hand a reassuring squeeze before you leave and he’s left staring while you go back inside.
-.-.-
A little past two, the girls drop you off in a shared cub before going their separate ways and you rush to your apartment building, only to find Aaron waiting there.
“Well, you certainly have a thing for sitting on curbs.”
He looks tired, so tired, and alone in the empty street. It’s very hard to maintain your position when he always looks this beaten down in his most tender moments. You wish to care for him, love him back into happiness but that wouldn’t be fair.
Still, you can’t help but go to him and he is relieved that you sit closer this time.
“Have you been waiting here this whole time?”
“It hasn’t been that long.”
You softly take his right hand to look at his watch. His body relaxes at the touch.
“Huh.”
“Did you have a good time?”
“Yeah, but I’m a little more drunk than the last time you saw me.”
Your skin glows under the soft moonlight and he notices.
It is technically tomorrow now.
“How drunk?”
His face moves closer and you can’t help but shiver at the sudden change. His breath is warm on your face. The words come out in a whisper.
“Not that much.”
That’s all it takes.
His lips press against yours once… then twice and then… he doesn’t stop.
You always thought he’d be one to kiss carefully and with absolute purpose, just like he does everything else, but he kisses like a man on fire. He seeks to quench something deep inside of him and you provide happily. The remnants of your lip gloss tingle on his mouth, as if kissing you alone is not enough of an awakening.
It’s becoming increasingly hard to keep up with breathing when he envelops you so, and cages you in the pleasant whirl of his scent. When you break away for breath, he’s quick to capture you once more. His hands come to your face to keep you there until he’s had enough, but how he can he ever have enough of you?
He only lets you go because he has to. You’re both practically panting and he can’t decide what to do. He wants to kiss you, look at you, touch you, but it cannot all be done at once. When your own hand comes to his face just below his jawline, he melts under the touch. His eyes are sunken, his body is begging for rest, but it would not come without you.
“Do you want to stay with me tonight?”
His voice is low and breathy when he nods.
“Yeah…”
-.-.-
You walk upstairs, hand in hand, and Aaron can see your own exhaustion is taking over. Something started with that first touch. Your bodies wish only to find comfort near each other.
His breath is warm on your neck while you open the door, his hands softly placed on your waist with the excuse of keeping you steady. When you move to take off your shoes, he is behind you again, as if tied to you with invisible thread, and holds you gently by the elbow when he sees you struggling.
You’re suddenly very aware he is in your house again. Touching you.
“Can I get you anything?”
He shakes his head no, but you’re too focused on the way his hand moves languidly up your arm, leaving goosebumps in its wake, before tucking your hair behind your ear.
“Do you need me to get you anything?”
He is so caring. So soft below the austere guise.
“I just need to take a shower,” you almost stumble backward and he thinks it’s the alcohol, but it might just be the feeling of his hands on your face, “I must have fifty different people’s sweat on me right now.”
“That’s okay. I’ll wait.”
His voice is soft – tired.
You turn on the lights for him in the living room and he gives a half-smile when you check on him again.
“I won’t be long.”
Once left alone, he gets to look around your house. He sees your carefully assorted nick-knacks and smiles at the framed pictures all over your bookshelves. He can’t help but notice you’ve chosen one, if not the only, photo of the team that he’s also part of.
He is important to you too.
He can see you in every corner of the room, in the books you buy and the realistic-looking-but-admittedly-fake plants sprinkled here and there for a lack of time to take care of any real ones. He can even see you in the soft material of the couch when he sits and lets his cheek touch the fabric. He has been here before in a dream, with your head in his lap.
The room is awfully quiet save for the gentle ticking of the clock on the wall and the sound of running water in the background. For a man that’s usually so good at sitting alone with his thoughts, he suddenly can’t stand it.
He knocks gently on the bathroom door and opens it slowly, only to be hit with the dizzying cloud of warm steam. Your head peeks behind the shower curtain and he can tell you got tired of standing and sat in the tub instead.
“Is it okay if I sit in here with you?”
You thought he’d sit on the toilet seat, but he crawls to the edge of the tub and sits on the bathmat with his back to you.
How close is close enough?
Now that he’s ventured, he doesn’t think he’ll ever be satisfied.
So, he closes his eyes and rests his head back on the, now warm, porcelain.
“Aaron.”
He doesn’t know if he actually fell asleep, but the water is now turned off and you’re looking at him. He realizes now, for the first time, that you’re naked behind him. Your hair and eyelashes are angelically wet, the sheen of water on your flushed skin is divine. He knows that you’d be warm if he touched you now.
“Are you alright?”
“Yes.”
You smile at him -siren- and your hand grabs a handful of his shirt, staining it with water that reaches his body underneath and makes him shiver. You kiss him with plump wet lips and he reaches for you. His hand entangles in your hair until you’re both practically pulling at each other.
A less enamored man would have broken away just to sneak a peek at your bare skin, but he won’t. He is respectful even now, even like this.
“I should have kissed you the other day. I’m sorry I didn’t.”
It’s a whisper when his mouth leaves yours, but you catch it.
You hum, eyes glossy, “Would've, could've, should’ve.”
What matters is now.
He kisses you again – just one more time. You both feel like giddy, lovesick children.
“Can you hand me my bathrobe?”
The bathrobe is also impossibly soft to the touch and when you emerge clad in it, he thinks he’d like to hold you. The spell of the warm steam is broken outside, however, and being so close to your naked body suddenly becomes very serious.
You let him sit in your bed, still fully clothed, save for his suit jacket, and he closes his eyes again. The comforter underneath is lovely.
Is everything in this house soft?
Is this what it feels like to be loved by you?
You disappear inside the walk-in closet and reappear, now properly dressed in your pajamas. The bed dips when you sit next to him and he turns to you completely.
“I have a T-shirt you can sleep in, don’t know about pants though.”
Please. Just be here, with him.
He watches you leave, but it’s not long before you return with the aforementioned shirt. You laugh when he finally realizes he’ll have to sleep in his boxers.
“Don’t worry, I won’t take advantage of you.”
He throws a teasing look, but can’t possibly come up with a clever answer right now.
“I’ll go dry my hair and you can get dressed, alright?”
You are so gentle with your guidance that it makes him feel like a helpless child, but there’s a hidden relief at that. It’s nice; being cared for like this and there is something to be said about parallels, with you going now to do as you had done a week and a half ago in a Florida hotel and him waiting for you – on your bed.
It’s the same, but it’s different.
He hangs his work clothes carefully on the chair in the corner of your room and goes to sit on the bed, but feels too uncomfortable to climb under the covers. He knows you’d find his duality funny; how he goes from hungrily kissing you to being too embarrassed to join you in bed, even if it’s only for sleep.
You notice his stiffness when you come back in the room, but don’t say anything. It’s not exactly easy for you either, you’re just better at hiding it than he is. You choose to lead by example instead and turn off the lights before reaching for the one on your nightstand and climbing inside your bedding.
He only speaks to deflect attention from him again, “You have a TV in your room.”
“Jealous?”
He turns to look at you and you’re perched up on the plump pillows, smiling at him. Your hand reaches for his own over the comforter and you gently pull him to you.
He comes, of course.
“I don’t watch a lot of TV.”
“Of course you don’t.”
He joins you with his back on the pillows and his shoulder touching yours, but he’s still too stiff.
“What do you watch?”
“Mostly reruns of sitcoms-,” he laughs at that, “-Seinfeld.”
“Isn’t that show a thousand years old?
“You would know.”
He laughs again and you can almost make out a wounded pout on his face, but a kiss is enough of a cure. His shoulders relax and he gives in to the warmth and softness; be it the bed or you next to him. You can tell he’s barely managing to stay awake, but he still can’t let go completely. His head slumps backward again.
“Can we turn it on?”
You find the courage to caress his hair, admiring the softness of it and the discreet sprinkle of grey that you can only see up close.
“If you want.”
The quiet humming of the television and your breath in his ear, putting his mind to ease, are enough for him to finally sleep and you’re not long behind. His head is turned to the side where you are, hand tightly holding yours.
Later in the night, when you stir in your sleep, he pulls you further into him – wraps his arm around you completely and doesn’t let go.
next part
#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner imagine#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#thomas gibson
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wahwahwah
would y’all be down if I did touchstarved sprite commissions 🫶
#the eyebags need to be worse if it’s me.#for the life of me cannot figure out how 2 draw long hair in their style#it’s not gonna be 100% accurate but i’m tryin!!!#i wagt 2 get this done so i can have a recent reference for comms + the program i’ll be using#since selias was drawn on procreate (edited some on csp though)#me when i have to fill in the pupils for once ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️#then m gonna take a week long break from this. u don’t wwana know how long it’s been taking me. this ios sprite/pose attempt n5 or smth#also chose alchemist background for me :] nothing like being betrayed by a parental figure amiright‼️#was trying 2 b realistic 2…. i would die asap as the hound. i’m too frail and weak and pathetic#i could b raised in a cult but i’d be an awful cult leader n i just cannot see it#id be an awful alchemist too because i suck ass at chemistry and math and like that’s what alchemy is right but just with magic.#yeah and i decided that’s what i’d be. my mentor figure suffers greatly from it.#id try using the curse on myself bc those r my worst 2 subjects. pathetic cringefail alchemist who can’t even do alchemy#mhin n kuras ralkinh abt it. me going mhm yup yup so true guys.#no idea what the fuck they’re saying at all#WAIT also curious. is it even allowed for me 2 do this. 2 make money off of a game’s art style. isn’t that a big weird or no??? i’m not sure#bit weird i meant
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Summary: Who knew you could find a lot more than a basketball game at The Garden.
Warnings: Swearing, heavy flirting, mostly fluff
Word Count: 2.4k | unedited
⊹₊。ꕤ˚₊⊹
“We should probably go find our seats.” You nudge Laura, “I think the game is about to start.”
“We have time, relax.” Laura laughs, “Have you ever been to a basketball game like this before?”
You shake your head, looking around, “No, the only basketball game I’ve been to was my high school team, who absolutely sucked.”
“Well, the Celtics don’t suck.” She looks at you, “That’s who you’re rooting for, right?”
“Well yeah, obviously.” You shake your head and pull your phone out of your pocket. You snap a picture of the court, tagging the team before posting it to your Instagram story.
“Alright. I’ll catch you guys later.” Laura turns around, “I’m so glad you got offered courtside seats.”
“Yeah, I don’t know how. They just dm’d me asking if I wanted to come, I figured it would be fun and I know you like them so.”
“I could kiss you right now.”
You laugh, “That’s okay. I’ll just settle on you buying me dinner afterwards.”
“Oh that’s a good deal.” She glances back at you as she walks towards the steps. You follow her down and find your seats at the end of the court.
You look around, feeling kind of underdressed at some of the other girls are dressed up, heels and all.
“Stop that. You’re good.” Laura nudges you, “You dressed perfect.” You furrow your brows, “How do you know when I do that?”
“I know you.” She smirks, “A little too well, at that.”
“It’s kind of scary.” You laugh, turning your attention back to the court.
Halfway through the first quarter, you pull out your phone, snapping a picture of your jeans, sneakers, and the game that’s going on.
Taking a video and adding it too while you’re at it.
You’re an influencer at a popular basketball game, might as well give them the publicity you think they invited you for, right?
“This is actually quite entertaining.” You lean in to Laura, booing when the crowd boos. You were getting into it.
You bring your phone up, smirking as you see an Instagram notification - Christopher Sturniolo replied to your story.
You angle your phone, smirking at Laura, “Look who just-“
“Girl, you better get on that.” She nods, “What did he say?”
You tap on it, biting your lip as it opens into the thread, if you look closely I’m in the background of that video.
You click on the story and rewatch it, smirking when you see a quick glimpse of Chris. You swipe out and type back, Look at that, you are. Enjoying the game so far?
As you stare down at your phone, Laura nudges you and you look over at her, then to the direction she’s pointing.
A smile washes over your lips as you see Chris, Nate, and Matt on the Jumbotron.
You watch as they all smile and wave and then sure enough, your face is on it. It rapidly changes to a smile, to a shocked expression, then to a happy expression as you and Laura both wave.
“Oh my god that was embarrassing.” You mumble as you sink down into your chair, “I didn’t expect that.”
“We’re beautiful women sitting courtside at a Celtics game, what did you expect, y/n?” Laura laughs and cheers as Nick and Mikayla appear on the screen.
You clap and yell before returning your attention back to your phone, reading Chris’ message, I am, you?
You tap the screen, tilting your head slightly, It’s definitely something new. I’ve never been to one of these games before, but it’s exciting. Go Celtics!🍀
“Oh my god.” You lay your hand over your face, “I’m so stupid. You would think, just by how this conversation was going, I never spoke to this man before in my life.”
Laura turns your phone towards her and she can’t help but giggle, “Noo! That was cute!” You roll your eyes at her and look up at the game that has restarted.
You couldn’t help but find yourself looking for Chris through the moving bodies on the court. It’s not that you and Chris have history, per se.. it’s more or less feelings that neither of you have displayed for one another, yet.
You’ve done a video with them before, and you’ve stayed friends with all of them afterwards, and surprise, you’re more close with Chris than the other two.
You look down at your phone as it vibrates and you can’t help but smile as you click on Chris’ message, Atta girl, but we gotta get you to some more games. You’re from Boston for Christ sake lol.
You smirk as you answer back, Is that you offering to buy my ticket? Because if so, count me in.
“Was that.. too straight forward?” You look at Laura and she shakes her head, “You know what you want, and I say you just better go for it.”
You chew on your cheek, the smirk returning to your lips as you watch the chat bubbles bob up and down before his message comes through, I’ll take you to every one of their games if you don’t mind traveling.
“Oh he is so into you.” Laura mumbles with a smirk, “Ask him to go to dinner afterwards, it can be as a group or whatever so it’s not awkward.”
“I will, just.. give me a second.” You go back to typing out your response, If you think I’d have an issue with traveling, then you clearly don’t know me at all lol
You weren’t even interested in the game anymore, you were more interested into talking to Chris.
Chris responds, there’s another game here on the 12th, I can get us tickets right now. Or the 13th at the Barclays Center in Brooklyn.
You take a deep breath, Why not both? I can get the Brooklyn ones if you want?
You hit send and you bounce your leg, trying to keep your heart from racing out of your chest. You glance over the court, seeing Matt and Nate pick on him for smiling so hard.
“How’s it going?” Laura asks and you shrug, “May have just planned out one if not two dates.”
“look at you go, girl.” She smirks at you and your phone vibrates, sending an excited chill up your spine. He sends a screenshot of the gotten tickets and you smile as you shake your head, Looks like it’s a date, or dates? I don’t know, but I’m excited to understand the world of basketball better.
You look around, clapping when the fans wearing Celtic clothing clap. Your attention is ripped from the game instantly as soon as you feel the vibration, hell it wasn’t even on it anyway, Well, since we finally scheduled a date, I guess it’s safe for me to say you look gorgeous tonight.
You purse your lips as your cheeks heat up, It was safe before, way before lol, but thank you. You look good in green, it almost makes up for the shots you took earlier.
You and Chris are always teasing each other, so it wasn’t anything out of the ordinary for one of you to start picking.
You look up, watching him cover his face as he laughs, turning to tell Nate and Matt, what you assume is what you said you saw.
Ohh fuck, you saw that? Now it’s even more embarrassing.
You can’t help but giggle, You were under a lot of pressure, we know lmao.
It’s almost like Chris wasn’t interested in the game either anymore, he would answer back almost instantly, Yeah, the pressure. We’ll go with that. Do you have any Celtics merch?
You glance down from the game, Look over and see.
You set your phone down and move your hair out of the way of the Celtics logo on your white crew neck. You stare over at Chris and he gives you a smile, raising his hand to give you a thumbs up.
He looks back down at his phone and yours vibrates, I like that also you know what I just realized? I have your number, why are we talking through insta?
You laugh slightly, I honestly have no idea.
Right after you hit send, you get a text from him, Hi.
You smirk, Hi, how’s the game?
“Moved onto texting I see.” Laura teases as she sits back down, “Here.” She hands you a drink, “Figured you could somehow manage to quench your thirst a-“
“Alright.” You cut her off, “You’re going to make me blush even more.” You laugh and take a sip before you steal some of her popcorn, “I didn’t even know you left.”
“You’ve been glued to your phone, I didn’t want to interrupt anything.” She smirks and shakes her head, “It’s about damn time something happens between the two of you.”
“Shut up.” You roll your eyes and look down at your phone, I don’t know, I haven’t been paying that much attention to it honestly.
Same here. I’ve been a little distracted, you look around, realizing that it’s halftime, “Huh, halftime. That was fast.”
“Well th-“
“Can it.” You laugh, “I know.” You look down and bring your phone up to read your new text, Distracted by what, ma?
You glance up at him, smiling slightly when you see Chris actually paying attention to the game. You look back down and type, Oh you know, just by this cute guy finally asking me out on a date, I’ve only been waiting for.. oh I don’t know.. months now.
You hit send and immediately look back up, giving Matt a weird face when he looks at you with a smirk.
He laughs and your attention turns back to Chris, who immediately picks up his phone and starts smiling like an idiot, Months huh? Man that guy fucking sucks.
You let out a slight laugh, He definitely made up for it though, well almost….
You look up, watching some of game while it takes Chris all of two seconds to reply, Almost huh?
You answer back just as fast, I mean, yeah. He bought me tickets to see two basketball games and I’m just hoping he’d ask me to dinner after this one, but we’ll see how it goes.
Your heart was racing. You’ve always thought that the two of you were better off as friends, but now that you think about it, you were always each others, just never official.
“God you guys just need to meet at half court and have a passionate kiss.” Laura smirks, tilting her head, “That would actually be so romantic, all of the people cheering you guys on.” She sighs, “I need to find a boyfriend.”
You laugh, “As much as I would love that, I think we’ll settle on keeping the pda to a minimum.. for now.” You smirk and look down at your phone, Do you want to grab dinner after this y/n?
I would love to, Chris, you smirk and nudge Laura, “I have a date after this.”
“About damn time.”
“You’ve said that already.” You laugh, looking around. You clap and cheer, glancing up at the scoreboard to see the Celtics leading, “Hey, we’re winning.”
“I’ve known that.” She laughs, “I’m not in world Y/n Sturniolo.” She looks at you, “That has a nice ring to it.”
“Don’t rush things.” You look away, tilting your head as you think about it, “It does though, doesn’t it.” You laugh, looking back at her.
You look down, tapping on the text, If you want you can meet me over here when the game is over, that way we’re not swimming through the crowd up there trying to find each other.
Laura and I drove separate, so that works out perfect, and hey. Celtics are winning!!
“I guess it’s a good thing we drove separate.” Laura laughs and you show her your phone, “I literally just said that to Chris.”
She laughs, “Oh my god.”
You laugh, shaking your head, “We are one.”
“Kinda scary.” She looks at you and you both break out into laughter, quickly switching to cheering and clapping when the Celtics score more points.
You could really get into this basketball scene.
You get another text from Chris, that’s because you’re just a lucky charm🍀
You smile, We’ll see if that’s the case on our second and third date. You set your phone down, turning towards Laura, “Is this actually happening?”
She nods with a smile, “It is. Do you want me to pinch you?”
“No, no.” You stop her as she reaches over and you laugh, “I believe you.”
Chris texts back, I’m ready for this game to end now haha, you glance up at the scoreboard, texting back, Just a little bit longer, I think you’ll make it.
You see the texts bubbles pop up, I don’t know, I have a date with this really pretty girl and to me that’s more exciting than this basketball game.
You feel your cheeks heating up and you quietly inhale as you type, Aww, you can be nice.
Yeah I thought the same thing about you.. kidding kidding.
You laugh, shaking your head and you jump slightly as the buzzer goes off. The fans uproar with excitement as the Celtics win and you stand up, cheering, clapping and jumping around with Laura.
You bring your phone up, Guess what? Games over.
You tuck your phone into your pocket and look at Laura, “Do you want to walk over with me and then we can all walk out together?”
She nods, “Yeah, that’ll probably be best.”
You make your way around the court, weaving in and out of people while you look for Chris through the crowd. You spot him, keeping your eyes locked on his as you lead Laura with you.
You give him a smile as you walk up to him, “Hey.” You look at Nate then Matt, giving them a smile, “Hey, guys.”
Chris immediately takes your hand into his and interlocks your fingers, “Ready?”
You give his hand a squeeze and you nod, “Ready.”
⊹₊。ꕤ˚₊⊹
Thank you so much for reading, I know absolutely nothing about basketball, so sorry if nothing makes sense, but I tried to just keep it focused on texting Chris. I hope you enjoyed! I love you and I will catch you in the next one! 🖤
Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!
#samandcolby-ownme#Chris Sturniolo#Chris Sturniolo fluff#Chris Sturniolo Celtics game#Chris Sturniolo fluff one shot#Chris Sturniolo x reader#Chris Sturniolo x you#Chris Sturniolo x y/n#Chris Sturniolo x reader fluff#Chris Sturniolo x you fluff#Chris Sturniolo one shot#Chris Sturniolo oneshots#Chris Sturniolo one shot fluff#christopher sturniolo#Christopher Sturniolo x reader#Christopher Sturniolo x reader fluff#Christopher Sturniolo x you#Christopher Sturniolo x y/n#Christopher Sturniolo x you fluff#Christopher Sturniolo x y/n fluff#fluff#fluff one shot#fluff Sturniolo#Sturniolo one shot#sturniolo x reader#sturniolo
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Y/N was a force of nature, effortlessly charming and bold. She had taken a particular interest in Aaron Hotchner, and her playful flirting left him flustered more often than he cared to admit.
As they stood at the latest crime scene, Y/N leaned in closer to Aaron, her shoulder brushing against his. “Hotch, you know, I think the real crime is how serious you look right now. A little smile wouldn’t hurt,” she teased, giving him a knowing glance that made his heart race.
He cleared his throat, trying to focus on the evidence. “I’ll keep that in mind,” he managed, but her presence lingered in his mind long after she had stepped away.
One afternoon, she knocked on his office door and sauntered in without waiting for an invitation. “Hey, Hotch. Mind if I steal you for a minute?” she said, leaning casually against his desk, her body exuding confidence.
“I’m kind of busy,” he replied, but he couldn’t help but let his eyes wander over her, taking in the way she moved.
“Busy? Or just avoiding a good time?” she countered, a playful smirk on her lips. “You know you could use a little fun in your life.”
He chuckled softly, running a hand through his hair. “You certainly have a way of making things interesting.”
—-
On a flight back from a case, Y/N settled into the seat next to him, a subtle glint in her eyes. “Hotch, I was hoping you’d save me a seat. I’d hate to sit next to someone who can’t keep up with my conversation.”
“Is that so?” he replied, trying to sound casual while his heart raced. She leaned closer, her voice low. “Absolutely. You know I’m the most entertaining person you’ll find on this plane.”
“Right,” he said, feeling the heat rise in his cheeks as he tried to focus on his laptop.
—-
At the annual FBI party, Y/N approached Aaron, who stood at the bar, nursing a drink and trying to blend into the background. “You know, Hotch, you really should let loose once in a while. It’s a party, after all,” she said, her voice smooth and inviting.
“I prefer to stay focused,” he replied, but even he could hear the weak excuse in his tone.
She stepped closer, her smile warm and inviting, and he couldn’t help but steal a glance at her figure. The way her curves filled out her dress had his mind racing. “But you’re here now. How about we change that? Care to dance?”
He hesitated, his breath catching in his throat. “I think I’ll just stick with my drink for now,” he replied, trying to maintain his composure.
Y/N laughed softly, the sound rich and inviting. “You’re adorable when you try to be serious. Just remember, you can have fun while still being in control.”
—-
After all these moments, with his heart racing and mind spinning, Y/N finally found the perfect opportunity to ask him out. One afternoon, she walked into his office, her smile confident. “Hey, Hotch. Got a minute?”
“Always for you,” he said, his voice softer than he intended, feeling the familiar rush of warmth.
“I was thinking,” she said, stepping closer, her gaze steady, “it’s been a while since we had dinner together. Just the two of us. How about it?”
“Y/N, I—” he began, but she held up a hand, her expression playful yet sincere.
“Just think about it. I promise it’ll be worth your while. A night with me isn’t something you want to miss.” She tilted her head slightly, a knowing smile on her lips, and he felt his defenses start to crumble.
“Okay,” he finally replied, his voice low and tentative. “Dinner sounds… good.”
Y/N’s smile widened, her eyes sparkling with mischief. “Perfect! I’ll pick you up at seven. Wear something nice, Hotch.”
As she turned to leave, she glanced back over her shoulder, her expression teasing. “And just so you know, I can make a night unforgettable.”
With that, she walked out, her confident stride drawing his gaze. Aaron couldn’t help but stare, captivated, as he contemplated the new dynamic they had just entered—and how much he looked forward to exploring it.
#aaron hotchner#aaron hotch x you#aaron hotch fic#aaron hotch fanfiction#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotch imagine#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner smut#aaron hotchner imagines#hotch x you#criminal minds hotch#aaron hotch hotchner#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds imagine#criminal minds smut#criminal minds
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