#First Aid And Emergency Life Support | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mockerycrow · 1 year

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Emergency Contact (2/2) (Ghost x GN!Reader)

-> PART ONE OF EMERGENCY CONTACT

Summary: You never expected Simon to come to your aid, and Simon assures you that he would come every single time.

A/N: I genuinely appreciate the support of this concept <3 I truly did not expect so many people to want a part two, so here it is! please rb with what you think, i love to hear y’all’s thoughts! i’m honestly not the happiest with this, but i did what i could. i may rewrite this in the future.

[WARNINGS: Hospital setting, fluff, hurt/comfort, medical inaccuracies, ooc Simon.]

IT TAKES YOU FOUR DAYS to wake up. Four entire days for you to even move an eye muscle. Four days of anxiety, of Simon lying in wait, waiting for sign of life. Despite the doctors’ assurances of your condition, the confirmed brain activity, Simon was panicking.

He just couldn’t lose you, too. Not when he has such a great thing going for him, so when he learns you’re in a mini coma—induced by your own body to allow your body to rest and heal, he can’t help but freak out. His mind screaming that you’ll never wake up, that you’ll always by lying in a hospital bed, until someone in your family decides to come and pull the plug. He tried to keep himself preoccupied—he read books and articles on his phone, memorized each time the nurses came in to check your vitals, he even texted Price an update about his situation—it wasn’t much information, but he said something along the lines of something happened at home and he thinks his leave with have to be for a month, but there’s a good chance it might be longer.

Simon barely left the room—he couldn’t. Not when at any moment you could wake up, or any moment you could’ve died. He didn’t manage much sleep, either. Every time he managed to fall asleep, the same nightmare would play; what he imagined how your accident went. He imagined you walking down on the sidewalk towards the crosswalk down a street you both frequented together. You were always careful when walking—he knew you were having car troubles for the last few weeks. You press the button on the crosswalk pole to trigger the lights to turn red. Cars slow to a stop, and your crosswalk signs turns to a walking man. You quickly hurry across the crosswalk, but a car comes speeding down—and smashes right into you, full speed, sending you across the road. Simon is just standing there, watching. Completely unable to help. He always wakes up once he walks up to your mangled body.

Simon gasps quietly and jolts awake again, blinking the bleariness away, and the slow beeps and exhales of your machines come back. His rapid heartbeat begins to slow as he realizes that he’s still beside your hospital bed. He looks at you—you’re no longer on a ventilator, but you have an oxygen mask, a way to help your collapsed lung. It makes him feel a bit better, but Simon would very much prefer your eyes to be open, your fingers moving against the blanket you’d likely hate the texture of when you woke up—if you woke up—and he would want to feel your muscles moving under your skin. He also tries to ignore the fear of you having Amnesia after waking up.

Simon isn’t sure when he laid his head back down, but it shoots back up the second he hears a quiet noise escape you—it’s the first sign of life to Simon, his wide eyes scanning your body. His eyes fly to your hand, your fingers twitching a bit. Simon grabs ahold of your twitching hand immediately and looks at your face and he isn’t so sure why his heart is pounding beneath his ribs, but he doesn’t have too much time to focus on it as your arm twitches. It’s like you’re slowly coming back to life in a weird way, but Simon finds himself totally silent, like he can’t find the right words to say just yet. He doesn’t mean to hold his breath, but he does as he watches your shoulder twitch next, and then your eyebrows furrow. Your eyes are already closed, but you squeeze your eyelids together harder. Simon realizes that you haven’t had your eyes open for about four days, so he quickly dims the rooms lights and returns right back next to you. Simon reaches for your hand and gently holds it, watching you slowly get your surroundings.

Your eye flutter open slowly and you blink, and it’s obvious you don’t immediately process that you’re in the hospital. A croaky moan of discomfort leaves you and Simon sits up, the worry eating at his stomach. You look at Simon with unfocused and exhausted eyes and your eyebrows furrow again and your lips part.

“..Simon?”

He releases the breath he was holding and he nods, his black mask slightly moving as his lips move. “I’m right here, [name]. Right here.” Simon absolutely hates how shaky his voice is, and he watches you bit your lip as your eyes begin to fill with tears. His heart skips a beat—what’s wrong? Are you in pain? Are you scared? Simon decides he needs to know because he can fix it, he can help you, right? He needs to fix it—“Y.. You came for me..” You whisper, blinking a tear rolls down your cheek to your jaw quickly. Simon’s own eyebrows furrowed��did you think he wouldn’t? “Of course I did, love.” He murmurs, his thumb brushing over your knuckles. “I will always come for you.” You try to hold in the quiet sob, but your shoulders begin to shake. Simon reaches up and gently wipes away a tear with his thumb while he squeezes your hand. “No tears now, hm? You’ve.. You’ve survived the impossible.” Simon says, forcing his voice to be steady. His eyes begin to burn with his own set of tears forming. “I came as soon as I heard, [name]. Don’t ever think I wouldn’t come for you.“

Your lower lip curls as you try to not cry from his sentiment; this is the man who took you in after losing everything, and it took him a long while to even let you know of his actual name, let alone see his face unmasked. This is the man who does not tell you the details of his job, but you know that he could be killed from it. This is the man who sits next to you near his windowsill when you both can’t sleep—the man who wakes up, just knowing something is up. He makes you a cup of your favorite morning drink whenever he can, he signs his sticky notes with a poorly drawn skull instead of his name, he makes piss poor dad and army type jokes, annoys you with his cockiness and bought you a damn mattress and bed-frame—even thought he never had to. He remembers the little things about you, your favorite shows and games—your favorite books, your favorite foods, hell, he remembers every little awful story about your workplace and your job. He’s always been like a wild animal—you come too close and he flees, but if you’re patient do what he needs, he’ll come to you.

Simon blinks away the tears and he clears his throat, his voice hesitant as he speaks. “You made me your emergency contact.” His tone isn’t questioning or warbling in any way—he says it like a statement, a fact, which it is. You laugh quietly which quickly turns into a grimace, causing Simon’s thumb to stop moving over your knuckles for a moment. Of course any movement or sound would hurt. “I.. I had to put one down, I just.. put the first person who came to mind.. Y’know?” You murmured nervously. Simon’s breath hitches for a moment and he only responds with a “mmh” for the time being, which definitely makes you way more nervous than you started out to feel. Your heart monitor spikes for a moment, causing Simon to speak up. “Hey—just relax, okay? M’not mad, love. Not mad at all,” He begins. He glances away from you for a moment before looking back with such a vulnerable look—like he’ll break at any moment. “It was just.. a surprise. That’s all.” But both of you know it was more than just a surprise. It was a small declaration of prioritizing each other—you setting him as the first person to be notified for an emergency, and his acceptance of this role. Simon never thought he would be sitting here, beside anyone else than his teammates in a hospital setting.

Simon isn’t sure when he fell in love with you. Whether it was the first moment he laid eyes on you or way later down the road—he doesn’t know. What he does know is that this.. feeling, isn’t as scary as it used to be. People getting close to him used to terrify him and it still does—but.. there’s something about you. Something about you that makes Simon feel safe. Makes him feel like he doesn’t have to sit in the corner to watch the entire room, you make him feel like he doesn’t have to sleep with a hunting knife stashed under his pillow. You make him feel like he doesn’t have to question your motives with anything you do, you make Simon feel like he can just sit down and relax without having to worry about, well.. anything else besides from the question of what you’ll have for dinner that night. He tries to hold in the shuddery breath and when he can’t, his eyes dart away to your arm. You open your lips to speak again, but you begin to cough. Simon grabs the paper cup of water that has a straw in it that he’s prepared for you everyday just in case you had woken up and he slots the straw between your lips, which you greedily accept and drink down the cold water. It soothes the ache in your throat from being on the ventilator and from not speaking for a couple of days. Once you’re satisfied, he places the cup back on the side table. “Hey, Si,” You croak, your fingers weakly squeezing his hand. Simon’s eyes immediately meet yours again, searching for any hint of pain. You lick your lips, a light smile coming to them. “Two blondes walk into a bar. You’d think one of ‘em would’ve seen it.” He stares at you for a moment, his eyebrows raising. “Did.. Did you just..” You laugh weakly and nod, looking at him. “I did.” You clear your throat again and squeeze his fingers. “Did it because you’re in your head.. Don’t hafta think so.. so much when you’re with me, Simon.”

Simon brushes his thumb over your knuckles once again and he can’t help but silently agree—he doesn’t have to think about anything right now, he can just sit here, with you—even if it’s in a place like this, with you in a condition like that. Simon looks at you and you look back at him, into his soul—and for the first time, he doesn’t want to look away.

taglist;; @alwaystired--neversleeping @handsomeunderwear-art @indefenseofkara @kaysav608 @1-is-loneliest-number @rosee-sensuelle @kitty-satan1 @k4marina @rahmown @royalty-purple @bowtruckleninja @cumikering @silent-neptune @purechaosss @hauntedpass @mxtokko @meimhem [crossed out = not able to tag sorry!]

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fiber-optic-alligator · 8 months

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Hello! I’ve always been curious about the “human in a space shuttle somehow ends up on a cybertronian ship and all the bots are trying to figure out what this random metal this is while the human is terrified” plot.

It would be interesting to see it played out with any character, but for the sake of direction, I’d like to request this with the Lost Light Crew?

It could be vore if that’s what you feel like wrong at the time, but I’d also go for some good ‘ol fearplay.

I apologize if this is too vague, have a good day/night and I love your writing!

Thank you for the request Glitch! I hope this is up to your expectations! I hope you don't mind that I picked specific members of the Lost Light crew to include in this story. Feedback is always appreciated! Have a great day/night as well! :D

Doctor’s (And Scientist’s) Orders

Pairing: IDW Ratchet, IDW Perceptor, and IDW First Aid x Human Reader

Word Count: 3115

Summary: You are a teacher who is being sent from Earth to a colony on Mars. A new life as an educator for the red planet’s children is on your horizon…until you are thrown terribly off course and end up in the bowels of the Lost Light. All seems lost for you when you find yourself injured and cut off from human society, at the mercy of the three Cybertronians who end up finding you and taking you in, whether you want them to or not.

The first thing you hear when you come to is the horrid screeching of your ship's alarms.

You groan and sit up. Smoke and flickering emergency lights greet you when you open your eyes. Electricity sparks from the stasis tank you were asleep in. Gas spurts from the ceiling, and everything is strewn about with the chaotic air of a tornado that just tore through an entire town.

“Warning,” your ship’s AI urgently alerts. “Breach detected. Damage is collateral. Warning-warning-” It sputters and fizzles out.

You rub the back of your head and feel something warm and sticky coat your palm. When you pull your hand back to take a closer look, you see blood.

Shit. That’s not good.

Standing up makes you feel like you are going to puke. Your head throbs and every breath you take sends piercing pain through your chest. Dragging yourself out of the stasis pod takes longer than it should while black spots dot your vision as you stumble to the dashboard and press your hands against it. “Run ship diagnostics,” you manage to rasp. The voice that struggles to exit your mouth is one you hardly recognize. It is thin and strewn with violent coughs. A metallic taste coats your tongue. More blood.

The AI glitches as it attempts to answer you. “Severe damage to hull. Severe damage to engines. Severe damage to thrusters. Life support online, but rapidly depleting. Escape pod offline.”

“Shit,” you breathe. “Try contacting Earth control.”

“Communications systems offline. Attempting self-repairs. Current status…5%.”

“How long until repairs are complete?”

“Estimations indicate repairs will be completed in…5 days.”

Not good. Not good at all. You push yourself away from the dashboard and take in all that has happened. This was not how the mission was supposed to go. When you were chosen to be sent to Earth’s Mars colony as a teacher for the young children growing up on the red planet, you thought it would be a smooth seven month trip with you peacefully slumbering away in stasis. You were supposed to be woken up by fellow human beings, not a devastating crash resulting in your ship being decimated. Something must have thrown you off course. A freak asteroid strike probably. Which begs the question…where exactly are you?

Ignoring how much pain you are in, you hobble through the remains of the vessel and head for the airlock doors. They remain tightly shut when you make it to them, hiding the knowledge of where you are from view. “Open the doors,” you call out to the ship.

“Warning. Remaining onboard is strongly recommended. Current exterior environment is unknown.”

“Override. Open the doors.”

The doors whoosh apart. You know there’s oxygen outside. If there hadn’t been, the ship would have prevented you from even entering the airlock chamber in the first place. Stepping off, you expect to see the barren landscape of Mars, or the alien environment of some other planet you might have ended up on. Part of you thinks you might still be on Earth; perhaps something went wrong with the ship before you could even break the Troposphere.

What you see surprises you. You are in some sort of…massive cargo hold.

Gigantic metal crates surround you, most of them exuding a pinkish glow. There are lights on the ceiling far above you, but they are dim, and serve little aid in giving you an estimate of just how large this place is. Turning in a circle, you feel awe fill you. “Yeah,” you murmur to yourself. “The ship definitely didn’t crash on Mars.”

Speaking of your ship…you take in the damage. It's an absolute mess of warped, crippled metal doomed to remain collapsed on its side until self-repairs are complete. It would take days, maybe even weeks, for damage of this caliber to be fixed beyond the communications systems. With no way to contact Earth or Mars, you truly are stuck.

You close your eyes and pinch the bridge of your nose. Calm. You are calm. There is absolutely nothing to worry about. Yes, your ship is destroyed. Yes, you are suffering from critical wounds. Yes, you are in an unknown place with seemingly no way out. But you're alive. That’s what matters. And now you just have to survive for five more days.

You hear thumping in the distance.

It takes you a moment to register the pattern of heavy steps that are coming towards you. It’s something alive, you realize with dawning horror. Wherever you are, you have obviously made quite a racket, and now this planet’s local faunal residents are going to seek you out. There’s no way for you to know exactly what sorts of animals live here; any technology you might have used to your advantage is directly connected to the ship. With the ship offline, thus go the tools as well. You are completely in the dark, relying only on the little information about alien lifeforms you have to keep you safe.

You don’t need that information to know you have to hide right now.

You scurry back into the ship, biting back a shout of pain. God, there’s pain everywhere. How have you not passed out yet? Adrenaline does wonders for the human body, you sourly think to yourself when you have to lean against the wall to catch your breath. A hacking cough swells within your chest. When you cover your mouth with your elbow and release it, blood is splattered over your suit sleeve.

That’s when you hear the growling.

It’s unlike anything you have ever heard before. You’ve studied a multitude of animals. You’ve heard big cats roar, wolves howl, hyenas cackle, and birds screech. This is not a growl you can associate with any of those. It…holds similar qualities. But there’s something about it that remains blatantly off.

It sounds strangely like the growl of a machine.

You look outside of the airlock doors, and something huge lumbers out from behind a stack of crates. The first things your brain registers are its red and white armor platings, its bright blue eyes, and the horn-like finials extending from its forehead. It’s humanoid, yet possesses qualities that remove it from any such grouping. This thing is definitely not like you in any sort of way beyond having a face and walking on two legs.

“It’s…a robot,” you whisper. It’s a giant fucking robot moving all on its own, and looking none too happy to be here.

The mechanical creature snarls, lips upturning to reveal sharp canines that are probably longer than your arms. It hasn’t noticed you yet. Its focus is trained on the datapad it holds in its hands. Your mind is blown. This is obviously a member of a clearly intelligent race. Have you just discovered a new extraterrestrial species?

The robot looks up. At first, its eyes scan the crates around you, and it doesn't seem to notice the little ship nestled between them. You remain still, prey instinct taking its course and demanding you freeze where you are. Hopefully it will just move on…

It backtracks, and to your utter horror, it makes direct eye contact with you.

Fucking shit, you think.

The robot stares at you with an expression of pure shock. You stare right back with an equal amount of terror.

It steps towards you. That’s all it takes for you to scream at the ship. “Close the airlock doors! Close them now!”

The doors slam shut. You hear a shout from the robot, and everything shakes as it thunders forward. You stumble and fall with agony ripping through your poor body when you make contact with the floor. The cry that leaves you is riddled with pain.

“A-Activate self-defense protocol!” you order the ship.

“Self-defense protocols offline,” it says back.

“Well, how long until they are online?!”

“Estimated time equals…ten hours.”

“That’s not enough!” you scream rawly.

A gentle tapping echos from the other side of the doors.

You push yourself back, heart pounding as you listen to the robot move all around you. It’s growling softly to itself, and you can hear it touching the ship, running massive mechanical fingers across the walls that act as the only barrier between you and potential doom.

You don’t know what to do. Panic makes you frantic and you desperately try to think of how you can get yourself away from the monster outside. You have no way to defend yourself. You can’t even run. This thing wants you out, and you know it has the power to rip your ship apart in order to get to you if it wishes for it.

Suddenly, everything rocks. Your stomach drops when the entire ship shakes and you feel it being lifted into the air. Realization of what is happening hits you: it’s picking it up. If it can’t get you, it’ll just have to take everything.

“Nononono!” you cry out. The ship tips a little, and you slam into a wall with a grunt. “Stop!” You bang your fists against the metal. “Put it down! Put it down now!”

The robot simply growls in reply. You don’t even know if it hears you. There’s nothing you can do to stop this. You slump back and cover your face as hot, helpless tears finally begin running down your cheeks.

“What exactly is it?” First Aid asks as he peers down at the mangled hunk of metal sitting before them on the medibay berth.

“It’s a ship,” Perceptor flatly replies with a silent “What else would it be?” evident in his tone.

“This is a ship?” First Aid looks horrified. “But it's completely destroyed! How could it have gotten here?”

“It must have crashed during our last refueling.” Perceptor lays his servos over the top of the ship, examining it closely. He huffs and straightens, looking at Ratchet. “Where did you find it?”

“The cargo hold,” the medic replies. “I was down there searching for some extra medical supplies I know we have stored. I wouldn’t have seen it if it hadn’t been for what’s inside.”

“There’s something alive in there?” First Aid gasps.

“A human,” Ratchet replies. “It locked itself inside when it saw me.”

“Impossible.” Perceptor shakes his helm. “Humans are an endangered species that only occupy a small sector of a primitive solar system. They don’t have the technology to make it this far out in space.”

“Well, clearly they do. I know what I saw. These old optics aren’t that far gone.” Ratchet raps his knuckles gently against the ship. All three mechs have to lean in close so they can hear the soft squeak from inside.

“How do we get it out?” First Aid asks. “It could be hurt!”

“It is hurt,” Ratchet answers. “I saw it before it hid itself away. I don’t know how severe the injuries are, but I know it's in pain.”

“Then what are we waiting for? We need to help it!” First Aid presses his forehelm against the ship and whispers softly. “Hello, little human? Please don’t be afraid! We aren’t going to hurt you!”

A whimper is all he gains in reply.

Perceptor crosses his arms. “I can force it out, but you won’t like how I do it.”

“You can’t hurt it,” Ratchet sharply snaps. “That would be cruel.”

“I’m not going to hurt it,” the scientist bites back. “I’m simply going to pump a nontoxic gas into the ship that will cause it to eventually lose consciousness. It will have no choice but to come out, and then we can go on from there.”

“Are…are you sure?” First Aid wrings his servos nervously. “I don’t want it to be scared of us.”

“Whether it’s scared of us or not doesn’t matter,” Ratchet says. “It’s injured, and if we don’t do something, it’ll succumb to those injuries. It’ll understand we don’t want to hurt it after we patch it up.” He nods to Perceptor. “Go ahead, smoke it out.”

The scientist’s right servo transforms into a syringe. Ratchet watches with anxiousness churning in his tank as Perceptor presses his left index digit against the side of the ship and presses a small hole straight through with little resistance to stop him. A terrified shout from the human within causes First Aid to whimper.

Perceptor sticks the upper part of the syringe into the hole, pumping gas into the ship and pulling it back out after a moment, wisps of vapor trailing from the tip. A few seconds later Ratchet hears a string of weak coughs from inside. There is a tense moment where all three of them stand there, and then the doors open and you stumble out with a cloud of gas nearly enveloping your tiny form. You wheeze into your servos, then notice the mechs staring at you and try sprinting right back into the ship. Perceptor cuts you off, slamming his servo down and pinning you under his digits before dragging you back even though you yelp and thrash. You squirm one last time in his grip before suddenly going limp.

Perceptor gently shifts you to lie in the center of his palm. For a terrifying moment, Ratchet thinks you are offline when he sees how still you are with your optics closed. But then his sensors pick up on the rapid beating of your organic spark, and he relaxes. Not dead. Just simply unconscious.

“Give it here.” He holds out a waiting servo. Perceptor hands you over; you are given a quick look-over as Ratchet scans your body. There is a nasty cut on the back of your helm, and your vents are gravely bruised with terrible red marks. “Internal bleeding,” he mutters. “As well as external wounds. The crash really messed it up.” He curls his digits lightly over you and brushes his thumb over your forehead. “Doesn’t have a fever though, which is good. Damage is minimal, nothing life threatening. I can have it fixed in a few hours.”

“You know how to heal organics?” First Aid questions.

“I’ve been around for a long time. War changes you. I’ve had my equal share of saving Decepticon-ravaged planets inhabited by organics as well as machines.” Ratchet walks over to another berth, being careful not to jostle you too much. “First Aid, go grab the restrainers. We’ll have to keep it still so it doesn’t accidentally hurt itself when it wakes up.”

“You’ll have to keep it sedated too,” Perceptor says. “I can help with that. Just a little puff of the gas will keep it asleep.”

“Thank you,” Ratchet says, then pauses. “Listen. Don’t tell anyone about this yet. I don’t want everyone flocking into the medibay and stressing it out. We could accidentally scare this thing to death if we aren’t careful.”

“I won’t.” Perceptor nods. “Just…make sure it heals properly. I don’t doubt your expertise, but…” He looks down at you, and his optics soften. “It hurts my spark to see something so small in so much pain.”

First Aid returns with the restrainer. It’s a small mechanism that runs on magnetic power, created by the Lost Light’s resident mad scientist, Brainstorm himself. Ratchet places it directly over your lax form. With a quiet beep, it presses lightly over your midsection, and magnetic bindings weigh down your ankles and wrists. Seeing you trapped like this makes him feel guilty. This obviously isn’t going to be something you will like when you wake up. But there’s no other way for this to go. You won’t understand his good intentions until he heals you. Until then, he has to keep you still.

He grabs a small serum of glowing blue liquid and bends over you, gently pinching your little fleshy cheeks and working your intake open. “C’mon little one, drink up,” he whispers when he carefully forces the liquid down your throat. He sees your faceplate tighten with discomfort, but your throat pulses as you subconsciously swallow. “There you go. Good human, good human.”

“What are you giving it?” First Aid asks.

“Something I learned to make back in my early days,” he replies. “It heals from the inside. Works on both organics and machines.” He pats your cheeks praisingly and draws away. “There. That should help with the bleeding. It’ll be fine now. I’ll continue to monitor it over the next few days.”

First Aid exhales a relieved sigh. Perceptor reaches out a tentative hand and brushes your hair away from your closed optics. “It’s so small…so soft…”

“We have to be careful with it,” First Aid frets. “We don’t want it to break.”

“Listen.” Ratchet’s tone hardens authoritatively. “I said this before, but I’ll say it again. We have to keep this between the three of us. Don’t tell anyone about a human being in here.”

“But what about the captain?” First Aid asks. “Shouldn’t he know?”

“The captain can’t know. If he finds out there's a human on the ship, he’ll go nuts with excitement and probably end up accidentally crushing the poor thing. Until I confirm it’s not going to drop dead at any moment, we keep it a secret. Got it?”

Both bots nod. Ratchet nods with them. “Alright. I’m going to stay here and make sure it’s condition remains stable. You can come back tomorrow to check in on it and see how it’s doing.”

Perceptor dips his head and leaves without another word. First Aid lingers, optics never leaving you.

“It’ll be fine,” Ratchet reassures him. “I’ll take care of it. Go recharge.”

It takes a lot for the other medic to step back and exit the medibay. Ratchet watches him go, then sighs and drags a servo over his faceplate. Becoming the caretaker of an injured organic lifeform was not something he had planned for today. Primus, how the hell am I going to tell Rodimus?

A soft noise drags his attention away from the alarming thought of what might happen if the extroverted captain learns about his new “crewmate.” He looks down at you and startles a bit. Your eyes, foggy and unfocused, are staring right at him. There’s a fatigued expression of utter terror on your face that once again has his spark feeling like it's been ripped from his chassis and stomped on.

“You’ll be okay,” he whispers to you. “I promise.”

You close your eyes and let your helm loll to the side. Ratchet watches the soft rise and fall of your chassis for a few moments longer, then dims the medibay lights and returns to his previous work on the other side of the room.

Never do you stray far from his mind.

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qqueenofhades · 8 months

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Hi! This question has been noodling in my head for a few weeks, and I’ve been really curious to hear your opinion. I’ve appreciated your very thoughtful commentary on the ways the online left in particular have hurt the real and concerted efforts that have been made to navigate through the Gaza war in support of Palestine. I’ve seen a lot of outrage online about Biden bypassing congress in order to make another emergency weapons sale to Israel, which does indeed read as counter to helping to the Palestinians facing endless and indiscriminate violence. I understand that you might not want to answer this ask, because the work that you already do in your life offline and the work that you do here on tumblr to respond to and explain these issues is exhausting enough. Thanks so much for your time and your thoughtful contributions! It’s always really helped me remember to slow down and think critically about the media I consume.

Because you have asked this thoughtfully and in good faith, I will return the favor and give you a careful and extensive answer to the best of my ability. However, obligatory top-of-post disclaimer that I will disable reblogs at the first hint of any wankery in the notes and I will not answer any follow-ups or secondary asks at this time (unless I decide to do so, but I engage with this topic sparingly, judiciously, and only in small doses, so don't count on it).

First, let me say that the moment, I disagree with substantial portions of how Biden is handling the two main foreign-policy crises (Ukraine and Gaza). In regard to Ukraine, I think he's backed off, taken his foot off the gas, and otherwise given Republicans ammunition to keep delaying or watering down a new aid bill, is refusing to disburse military aid packages from the $4 billion of funding remaining that was previously approved by Congress, hasn't sent long-range ATACMS and other critical military hardware that might bring the war to an end sooner, and is not (as of the moment, though recent reporting suggests this might change) pushing hard enough for frozen Russian assets to be transferred to Ukraine for military and/or humanitarian financial assistance. However, I am also aware (unlike, it seems, much of the left-leaning internet) that I am basing these judgments only on my personal impressions, on what is reported (or not reported) in the media (which has plenty of its own problems) and otherwise what is formed in my role as an ordinary American citizen without any kind of special, classified, high-level, or government access. I know nothing more than any of you, and I also know that a lot of what goes on behind closed doors does not appear on Political Twitter and/or the Washington Post or the Guardian or Daily Kos or whatever other aggregate sources of information I or any left-leaning person typically consumes. So it's highly possible (and this is my cautious academic instinct speaking) that I do not, in fact, have a full picture of events. There are also contributing factors that Biden cannot simply handwave aside, even if he did, say, dip back into the $4 billion pot in the meantime. Congress will need to pass a new funding bill for Ukraine aid and the MAGA Republicans have been enthusiastically blocking it to the point where Putin's cronies on Russian state TV praise them effusively for it. We all know about the Republicans and Russia's mutual love affair. So.

The same goes for Gaza, and even more because we have already had reporting about how the Biden administration is walking a behind-the-scenes tightrope in a number of seemingly impossible tasks: keeping the war from spreading to a larger theater, pressuring Netanyahu to dial down, y'know, the rampant genocide (when Netanyahu notoriously doesn't like Biden, was very close with Trump, and would be happy to keep the war going in order to boost Trump's chances of being re-elected and save Netanyahu himself from his own criminal prosecutions), and pursuing a complex policy toward the state of Israel that does not follow the antisemitic Western Online Left's fever dream of "Israel suddenly disappears overnight and falls into the ocean and all Jews die or disappear." We have had multiple credibly sourced reports about this. Blinken is back in the Middle East right now trying to keep the war from spreading. The US under Biden has criticized Israel's essentially empty policy document for post-war Gaza as not being remotely feasible (because it's so vague) and gone so far as to voice support for a two-state solution with Palestinian self-determination (which is itself quite radically different from previous administrations). However, they have also vetoed UN ceasefire resolutions and other essentially meaningless political theater (the UN as a whole has been ruthlessly exposed in the last few years for being completely useless) that are easy to gin up outrage about, and that's what the internet focuses on, rather than any of the other complicated actions taking place.

All of this is to say that no, in fact, I don't blindly support everything the Biden administration is doing in regard to either Ukraine or Israel right now, but I actually have a sense of real-world perspective about it and understand that there are certain immutable realities that we are working with and which will not be erased by some absolute jackasses yelling at Biden in a historically black church at the commemoration of an anti-black terrorist attack. Likewise, as I've said it before and I'll say it again, and as plenty of other people have noticed and pointed out, the Western left is using this as an orgy of pseudo-revolutionary fervor that focuses on using Hamas as a proxy for their own fantasies of violent uprising against their own governments. Because while yes, anti-zionism and antisemitism are two distinct things and represent different aims and goals, it's become more or less irrelevant in allegedly pro-Palestine Western leftist spaces. It's just increasingly rabid, accelerationist, and nihilistic antisemitism all the time, or the obvious usage of "Zionist" to mean "Jew." It's not good. There is no concept of actual restorative justice for Palestinians or other people, such as Ukrainians, Syrians, Uyghurs, Taiwanese, etc, either undergoing genocide or facing the threat of it, because Western leftists have latched onto this cause solely as a stick to beat the Democratic Party with and have no actual moral interest or concern in stopping genocide elsewhere in the world or repudiating it as a method overall. They just want the state of Israel (which they characterize as a "proxy state for white western colonialism" despite the many, many things historically, religiously, and politically wrong with that statement, because it means it now Contains the Right Buzzwords to Oppose It) to be destroyed altogether in the name of "opposing colonialism," but it really seems to be all about opposing Jews. Hmm.

Simply put, Biden is not ever going to pursue a policy of "let's totally abandon Israel tomorrow, never sell it any weapons or allow it to defend its own civilians, and agree that Hamas is actually a good representation or advocate for the Palestinian people" in the way a number of Western Online Leftists seem to think he should do. There is still the fact that Israeli civilians do exist and that Hamas has continued to launch missiles at them daily, inconvenient as that fact might be for the Hamas fanboys (and fangirls) who now populate much of what passes for Western leftist discourse spaces. (Either that or they don't care, because in their view, Israeli civilians are fully acceptable collateral damage by virtue of simply living in Israel in the first place, which -- yikes. Fucking yikes. That is all.) The number of people professing to be lifelong leftists who are Just Shocked at all the antisemitism, or thinking that any and all antisemitism is just artificially introduced into leftist spaces by bad-faith right-wing/Nazi psyops either has not spent any actual time around leftists, or (more likely) simply does not listen to what they openly say. The antisemitism is virulent, constant, and only getting worse. On the most basic level, regardless of the other difficulties around the founding of Israel as a state in 1948 and the fact that doing so on some of the most bitterly religiously, politically, ethnically, and culturally contested territory in the world for over two thousand years was always going to be a massive clusterfuck, the fact of its immediate post-Holocaust creation simply cannot be ignored the way many Online Leftists do. Israel exists because of the worst antisemitic mass murder in recorded history (and that's a high bar). That fact must be incorporated into any actual discussions about its right either to exist or to protect its own civilians. But this gets turned into "Israel exists only as a puppet state of white western colonialists" which is just bad on so, so many levels.

The collective Western Online Leftist feeling seems to be that Hamas are innocent and wronged freedom fighters who are begging for a ceasefire and the cruel Israelis aren't granting them one. This is not true. Hamas has rejected multiple ceasefire opportunities, and continued to launch missiles and retaliatory attacks, because they are terrorists and they do not want or represent any serious opportunity to negotiate in the framework of western liberal democracy. They are treated as helpless woobified blorbos by much of the Western leftist-leaning internet. They are not. In that case, Biden bypassing Congress to sell Israel weapons (which was just something like 100 million of artillery shells, which is not nothing but still not a huge systematic thing like, say, Reagan's Iran-Contra scandal) is not great. I do not support anything Israel is doing to Gaza. It is abhorrent. However, there are reasons for Biden to provide some limited amount of weapons to Israel without congressional approval that do not automatically and mindlessly equate to BIDEN SUPPORTS TOTAL GENOCIDE IN GAZA!!!!!!1 Especially when as I've said, the Online Leftists only care about stopping genocide when it fits their political self-righteousness, and absolutely not at all the rest of the time.

This is representative of the fact that Western Online Leftism has now completed its all-out descent into blind Noam Chomskyism. Chomsky has never met a "leftist" or "anti-Western" genocide he couldn't deny, excuse, or openly cheerlead (going all the way back to the 1970s and Pol Pot/the Khmer Rouge in Cambodia and going up to the minute with Russia/Ukraine and Israel/Palestine). Noam Chomsky is the leftist Henry Kissinger. His ethics and morals are equally abhorrent, he's just as willing to justify total genocide in the name of advancing his preferred political ideology, and while there were (justifiably) celebrations and gloating memes across Tumblr when Kissinger finally bit the dust, Chomsky's beliefs are replicated with slavish adoration in many other Tumblr spaces and spread in some form or another to the rest of the website, which now takes them as leftist gospel (and let's not even talk about Twitter). This represents my absolute frustration with the fact that Western Online Leftism has devolved to such a degraded, mindless, useless, and malevolent level that "cheerlead for any anti-western/Leftist TM terrorist group or state" is taken to be the be-all and end-all of their moral philosophy. Someone remarked that ISIS peaked too early; if they were still at the height of their powers today, they would have a legion of devoted white so-called progressive Twitter users shilling earnestly and angrily for them, and Christ, isn't that the fucking truth.

I know we live in a hard, frightening, complex, and difficult world, and it's hard to sort out what our moral responsibility and action should be at any given time, especially since the answer is always so frustratingly partial and incomplete. Nobody of basic good sense and decency wants to see Gaza leveled while the Israeli state continues to apply a number of violently cruel collective punishments even outside the actual daily bombing of civilians. But for the love of god, let's get rid of the idea that the continued mindless violence doesn't benefit Hamas (because it does; unsurprisingly, sympathy for their cause has soared in Gaza) as much as it does Israel, or that Hamas is some kind of benevolent peacemaker that is being thwarted by the cruel imperialist US/West. And going back to the incident that prompted you to send me this ask: white leftists have often and repeatedly demonstrated their withering disdain for black people, Democratic voters, "mainstream" Americans, and anyone else doesn't buy into the twisted tankie fantasy land where getting rid of Biden would somehow be a massive coup for social justice (by getting Trump, now openly announcing at every turn that he will be a dictator, back into office! Very praxis, much justice. Wow.)

In short: if you, a white person, stand up in Mother Emanuel AME -- one of the most sacred sites for Black churchgoers, who are indeed often heavily Democratic voters -- in the middle of a remembrance service for victims of white supremacist terrorism, after the Black pastor has asked you not to protest inside the church out of respect for the Black community coming together to relive its trauma -- just so you can heckle Biden and feel good about yourself, then Jesus Christ. You don't care about restorative justice for people of color, or literally any justice at all, much less "stopping genocide." You just want to use them as props for your Chomsky cosplay revolutionary fantasies and your sense of self-righteous superiority over literally everyone else, regardless of the real-world consequences. So I have no hesitation whatsoever in telling those people to get fucked. Often and repeatedly.

#anonymous #ask #politics for ts #israel hamas war #russia ukraine war #history #long post

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fatliberation · 11 months

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The Fat Protestor

by @sparklejams and @jordallenhall

For everyone showing up to protest the US government funding of a genocide -- be loud, be safe. Your body is a force. If you are able, use it.

Police identify people by body type/clothing. Be aware (as if you could possibly forget) that you don't have the privilege of blending into the crowd.

Be aware that fatmisic police protocol and infrastructure can endanger your life during arrest.

Let this inform the risk that you take.

If you get arrested: raise hell about being cuffed with your hands in front of your body.

Mid-fat, super-fat, and infinifat people are especially at risk of positional asphyxia when cuffed with their arms behind them. Be especially vocal about any stress position where your knees are raised (sitting on a low police van bench, for instance).

Police typically don't listen to folks when concern is expressed over being cuffed in the back -- be loud. Verse yourself and your community in de-arresting practice. These risks are not commonly known, though are present not only for fat people, but also those with asthma and other breathing difficulties.

Make sure the people you are with are informed of these risks before protesting.

Direct action is sweaty. Prepare against crease rashes (yep - it's a normal self care maintenance thing if you have skin rolls/folds. It's normal. It's common. It's nothing to be ashamed about.) by drying with paper towels, using antiperspirant or cornstarch under your breasts/belly. When you get home, shower and treat with a wound cleanser (shoutout bactine spray) or a tea tree oil balm or soap as needed.

Our fat bodies are magnificent contributions at protests. Our fat bodies take more effort to move - think of all the wonderful ways we can use this to our advantage at a protest or direct action. We can block pathways and hold precious land with our fat bodies. We can shield and protect precious people with our fat bodies.

Bring:

• Change of socks. If you get caught in the rain or doused with water, or even if you sweat through your socks - walking around in wet socks will cause bad blistering.

• Light first aid/bandaids

• Water, snacks, meds

• A physical copy of your emergency contact in case of arrest

Try to go with other fat people. Comrades in normative bodies may not always consider your body and what is safe for you - so make sure you loudly advocate for yourself and your needs within whatever group you are with.

Stay cool. Take breaks. Sit or stop when you need to. Try to be hyper-mindful of getting overheated.

In case of hospitalization:

• Make a packet containing all medical info, advance directives, and emergency contacts. Put it in a clear sleeve with a humanizing photo of you with loved ones at the front.

• Learn more about how to make a Connection Kit and humanize yourself to healthcare workers in the Know Your Rights Guide on nobodyisdisposable.org

Remember that there is so much to do beyond the front lines.

• Provide jail support (wait to greet released protesters with water, snacks, hugs, and rides home).

• Provide your home as a central prep and recovery space before/after.

• Stay near the action and offer your car as a mobile phone charging station.

• Provide childcare.

• Drop off supplies.

Honor your body as a resource for civil disobedience. Center your needs.

#fat activism #activism #protesting #the fat protestor #free palestine

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lovelysakuryay · 1 month

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EDIT: This post has been gaining traction, just wanted to state this post made for the riots which had been occurring starting 6th August.

To my fellow uk tumblr users, in particular my fellow POC and immigrant tumblr users, i know that there is a shit ton of riots going on simultaneously today. please be careful and try not to leave your house unless you absolutely have to.

this post isn’t intended to spread hate or fear but rather to emphasise how important your safety in all of this is.

and if you do happen to be outside in the time of these riots, please try doing so in groups.

Here’s first aid advice if you are hit by an acid attack.

If you’re a victim of an attack call the Police on 101 (to report a crime that has already happened i.e your car windows were smashed) or 999 if it’s an emergency/people are in danger.

If you’re on public transport and you’re a victim of an attack text the British Transport Police on 61016 with the train/underground you are in, what the next stop is and a brief description of the issue. Always call 999 if it’s an emergency.

If you or anyone you know needs health advice and it isn’t life threatening, call 111 or go on the 111 website.

I know some people are going out to defend their mosques, if you are take some form of head protection with you as at the past riot’s they have been throwing bricks.

If your mental health takes a turn for the worst you can call the Samaritans line on 116 123 and always call 999 if you feel you are unable to keep yourself from harm.

And finally, below is a list of charities you can contact if you feel you need further support or you would like to donate:

- Exit Hate: a charity set up to help people walk away from extremism. they also provide support for family members of extreme people.

- Stop Hate UK: 24 hour hate-crime reporting hotline

- Migrant Voice: a charity helping migrants advocate for themselves

- Refugee Action: helping refugees re-build their lives

#uk riots #please stay safe #far right riots #edl #islamophobia #uk

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girlactionfigure · 1 month

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🧵𝐓𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝: 𝐖𝐡𝐨 𝐖𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐉𝐞𝐰𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐈𝐬𝐫𝐚𝐞𝐥 𝐀𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐭? 𝐒𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐫 𝐀𝐥𝐞𝐫𝐭: 𝐈𝐭 𝐖𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐀𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐬.

Enough is enough, Let’s set the record straight: the claim that Arabs welcomed Jews to Israel after the Holocaust is a false narrative and just a lie. The reality is that it's a much more complex and challenging history. Here’s a comprehensive look at the real dynamics of Jewish immigration and the reception in Israel.

1/ An Ancient Bond: Jews and the Land of Israel.

Let me first say that The idea that Jews arrived in Israel only as Holocaust refugees disregards their ancient and continuous connection to the land. Jews have maintained a consistent presence in Israel for thousands of years, documented in ancient texts and archaeological findings. Cities like Jerusalem, Hebron, and Safed were significant centers of Jewish life long before the 20th century. This deep-rooted connection shows the significance of Israel to the Jewish people throughout history.

2/ The status of Israel in the 1880s

By the 1880s, when the First Aliyah began, Israel was largely neglected and in disrepair. The region suffered from economic stagnation, sparse infrastructure, and minimal habitation. Many areas were desolate, with abandoned villages and a general lack of modern amenities. Public health conditions were dire, with widespread malaria and typhoid fever, and there was a severe shortage of medical facilities and basic health care. The land had been left in a state of neglect by previous rulers and local inhabitants, who had not invested in its development.

3/ The Transformation by Jewish Immigration.

Jewish immigrants arriving in the 1880s faced severe conditions but undertook significant efforts to transform the land. They joined the local Jewish community and they established agricultural settlements, drained swamps, and developed irrigation systems, turning barren land into productive farmland. New towns and cities emerged, such as Tel Aviv, which started as a small neighborhood and grew into a bustling urban center. Their work laid the foundation for the modern state of Israel, significantly enhancing living conditions and infrastructure.

4/ Hostility from Local Arab Populations.

Despite the historical presence of Jews, the arrival of Jewish immigrants in the late 19th and early 20th centuries was met with increasing hostility from local Arabs. Many of these Arabs, who began migrating to Israel around the same time as the First Aliyah, viewed the Jewish newcomers with growing animosity. This hostility manifested in violent confrontations and revolts, such as the 1929 Hebron massacre, where 67 Jews were killed, and the Arab revolt from 1936 to 1939, which targeted Jewish settlements and British authorities. This resistance reflects the significant opposition Jews faced, contrary to claims of a warm welcome.

5/ The Arab Mufti’s Alliance with Nazi Germany.

The situation grew more complex during World War II. Haj Amin al-Husseini, the Grand Mufti of Jerusalem, sought an alliance with Nazi Germany. In 1941, he met with Adolf Hitler, offering support for the Nazi regime and advocating for anti-Jewish policies in Palestine. This collaboration proves again the intense hostility Arab leaders had towards Jews and their aspirations, complicating the notion of Arab support for Jewish migration.

6/ The Efforts of Local Jews to Aid Holocaust Survivors

In stark contrast to the hostility faced, local Jewish communities in Palestine went to extraordinary lengths to assist Holocaust survivors. As the horrors of the Holocaust became known, Jewish organizations in Israel, including the Jewish Agency and various relief committees, worked tirelessly to find refuge for survivors. They orchestrated complicated immigration operations, known as Aliyah Bet, to bypass British restrictions and bring Jews to Israel. The efforts of these local Jewish organizations were instrumental in providing sanctuary and rebuilding lives.

7/ The Birth of modern Israel and the 1948 War.

The Holocaust heightened the urgency for a Jewish homeland. Despite restrictive British immigration policies, many Jews found refuge in Israel. The establishment of the modern State of Israel in 1948 was met with fierce opposition from neighboring Arab countries, who rejected the creation of a Jewish state. This rejection led to the Arab-Israeli War of 1948, driven by the refusal to accept a Jewish state and resulting in significant losses for the Arab forces.

8/ Displacement and Historical Complexity.

The narrative that Jews “took away” Arab land oversimplifies a complex situation. The land of Israel has always been home to a diverse population, including Jews, Muslims, and Christians. The 1948 war and subsequent conflicts led to significant displacement on both sides, including the expulsion of Jews from Arab countries and the creation of Palestinian refugees. This complexity reflects a turbulent history rather than a simple story of land grabbing.

9/ Refuting the “Jews Left” Myth.

The claim that Jews left Israel and returned only after the Holocaust is misleading. The fluctuating Jewish population in Israel over the years does not negate the fact that Jews have consistently maintained a presence there. The migration waves of the 1880s and 1920s demonstrate a profound connection to the land, driven by historical and spiritual significance, not by temporary circumstances.

Saying that Jews left Israel and came back only after the Holocaust is like saying that pasta isn’t Italian because there was a shortage in the 1930s. The essence of our connection to the land has remained unbroken, despite periods of challenge and fluctuation. Just as Italian cuisine remains Italian regardless of temporary shortages, the historical and spiritual bond of Jews to Israel endures despite the changing dynamics over time.

11/ Conclusion: Resilience Through Truth

The ongoing attempts to distort, manipulate, or deny Jewish heritage and historical facts only serve to strengthen our resolve and unity. No one welcomed us to Israel after the Holocaust but the local Jewish community, who worked tirelessly to provide refuge and rebuild lives. Despite the efforts to alter or obscure these historical truths, they remain steadfast and undeniable.

We will not let you change our history. No matter how much people try to change this fact, it won’t work. Throughout history, countless attempts have been made to erase or undermine the Jewish people, and each time, these efforts have failed. Today, with a strong and thriving State of Israel, it is not only misguided but delusional to believe that such attempts can succeed. The more history is challenged or distorted, the closer and stronger we become as a people. Our connection to the land, our historical narrative, and our cultural identity are deeply ingrained and resilient, reinforcing our unbreakable bond to the land and our unwavering strength as a nation.

@AP_from_NY

#Israel #Jews #History #Truth

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misshoneyimhome · 6 months

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would you be willing to do a Joseph Woll smut? maybe his girlfriend losing her virginity to him. i feel like he’d be so sweet and caring in the prep and aftercare but the next morning she’s craving joseph again

Well, of course, love! Although, I have to admit, I'm really not that great at first times, apparently - at least not in my opinion 🙈

I tried to keep to soft and romantic, but perhaps I made it too soft? 🤍

Anyway, I still hope it's enjoyable 🌺

Warnings; smut 18+; first-time, reader losing her virginity, fingering, protected sex (p in v);

Word count; 4K (it was not intended to be this long)

・✶ ｡ﾟ

The First Time | Jospeh Woll ⚡️🌺

Joseph Woll - Quite possibly the friendliest guy around, and he happened to be your boyfriend.

Being a tad older than you, you weren’t entirely sure why he'd opt to be with someone like yourself. Joe was a skilled hockey goalie, and with his genuine kindness, he could easily charm any young girl. Meanwhile, you were just a young woman trying to find your way through grown-up life.

Yet there he stood, Joseph Woll, with his gentle gaze and soft smile, choosing to be by your side. It had only been a few months since you officially became a couple, but it felt as though you'd known each other for an eternity. Every moment spent with him was brimming with joy, warmth, and a feeling of belonging.

You often found yourself pondering how lucky you were to have him in your life. He was more than just a hockey player; he was your confidante, your staunchest supporter, and your rock. And now, as you sensed your relationship blossoming, you couldn't help but wonder where this journey would take the two of you.

You’ met Joe in a charming café in Toronto, where the aroma of freshly brewed coffee filled the air, and fate orchestrated a serendipitous meeting. With your arms burdened by books and papers, you stumbled clumsily, causing your belongings to scatter across the floor. And in the midst of this chaos, Joe emerged like a knight in shining amour, swiftly coming to your aid.

With a friendly smile and a gentle demeanour, he assisted in gathering your scattered possessions, his presence quelling the embarrassment that threatened to engulf you.

Handing back your books, a soft chuckle escaped his lips. "Looks like you could use a hand there," he remarked, his voice warm and comforting.

Blushing slightly, you nodded appreciatively. "Thanks, I'm usually not this clumsy though," you replied, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear.

He simply smiled, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "No worries, happens to the best of us."

His smile was utterly captivating. His brown hair tousled just right by the occasional breeze from outside, and his prominent ears giving him an endearing and charming appearance.

"Well, thanks anyway," you said sweetly, but for a moment, neither of you seemed to step out of each other’s way.

Joe wasn’t entirely certain why he felt so drawn to your gentle manner, but a small part of him wished fervently that this moment with you could stretch on indefinitely. So instead of letting it fade, he chose to take a leap and prolong the conversation.

"So… you’re into pianos?" Joe suddenly inquired, his brows furrowing with curiosity as he glanced at one of your books.

“Oh, well, yeah, it’s kind of a New Year’s resolution, but I haven’t really managed to play much,” you admitted shyly.

“Well, I happen to play the piano myself, and I know quite a bit about it. If you don’t mind, I could join you for a drink and share some insights?” he proposed, indicating the empty seat opposite you.

"Sure, I'd like that," you replied, a touch of excitement fluttering in your chest.

And so, amidst cups of steaming coffee and shared laughter, your dialogue flowed effortlessly. From exchanging thoughts on your favourite books to swapping anecdotes from your lives, you found yourselves completely absorbed in each other's company, the hours slipping away unnoticed.

Joe had naturally been the most romantic gentleman when your relationship began. Following your initial meeting, he'd been nothing but considerate, arranging a proper date at a cosy, intimate restaurant. True to his gentlemanly nature, he picked you up and drove you home, focusing solely on engaging in heartfelt conversations and deepening your connection.

On subsequent dates, he whisked you away to museums, followed by more coffee outings. Then, on the fourth date, he extended a heartfelt invitation to his home to cook you dinner. He even serenaded you with a few tunes on his piano, creating an atmosphere straight out of a fairy tale.

His approach was unlike that of most men you'd encountered in recent years. They were typically the stereotypical frat boys, fond of getting drunk and hitting on young women, often resorting to groping. While many of your friends may have been drawn to such individuals, you shared no such inclination.

You preferred to keep to yourself, finding solace in the simple joys of curling up with a good book and savouring a cup of tea. And this suited Joe perfectly.

You weren't one to partake in wild nights out clubbing every weekend or engage in promiscuous behaviour. Instead, you possessed a depth that made you far more intriguing. Always composed and serene, you listened to Joe with a peaceful smile, your laughter like sweet melodies.

As weeks evolved into months and your bond with Joe grew deeper, you found yourself increasingly at ease and secure in his company. Yet, one aspect remained a source of insecurity for you. Though not entirely uncommon for someone your age, discussing the topic and admitting the truth still felt awkward: you were a virgin.

And aware of Joe's past relationships, you knew that he wasn't.

But what troubled you most was the longing to confide in him, even though you were unsure how to broach the subject. You had a strong feeling that Joe, being the kind-hearted person he was, would never judge you. The challenge lay in finding a way to mention it, as casually as possible.

You thought about the issue for some time. However, on your next date, where Joe had once again invited you over for homemade pasta and relaxed piano lessons, it seemed as though fate had decided the moment had arrived.

After enjoying the most simple and romantic dinner a man had ever prepared for you, you found yourselves nestled together on the sofa, your favourite TV show playing in the background.

On the third date, Joe had given you a quick peck as he escorted you to your door. And by the fourth date, your kisses had grown slightly deeper. However, tonight, you felt a longing for more – yet Joe, always respectful, was almost frustratingly so. You didn't want to come across as too eager, but as soon as his lips met yours, you were captivated and craving more than just a fleeting kiss.

And as you cuddled on the sofa, you found yourselves irresistibly drawn into each other's arms, sharing a sincere, passionate kiss. Your tongues danced in sync as you gently explored Joe's mouth, your fingers twined in his hair while he held you close.

He positioned himself half on top of you, mindful of his larger build, as your legs entwined with his. And it was then that you felt it. Through his thick jeans, you could feel his member growing firmer with the escalating intensity of the kiss, and suddenly, a new sensation enveloped you. Something you had only felt in solitude - a rush of desire.

Easing back a little, you broke the kiss, allowing both of you to catch your breath.

"Are you okay?" Joe asked tenderly, earning a slight nod from you. "So, what's on your mind?" he asked softly, locking his pleading gaze with yours.

Feeling a bit apprehensive about expressing your thoughts, yet also buoyed by a surge of confidence, you decided to speak up. After all, he must be thinking the same thing, judging by the noticeable bulge.

"Um, well…" you began slowly. "You... um... you're turned on?" you half inquired, half stated as gently as possible, not wanting to embarrass him. But Joe remained unruffled. Instead, he simply chuckled softly, briefly glancing down before returning his gaze to you.

"Oh yeah... sorry, I can't really help that, this um, this just feels really good," he admitted softly, a broad grin spreading across his face.

And you couldn't help but smile too. "It really does…"

There was a brief moment of comfortable silence as you pressed your lips together, maintaining eye contact with the man above you.

"Are you sure? I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable," Joe expressed once more, his concern and kindness shining through.

But you simply shook your head gently. "You're not… I just…" Once again, you hesitated for a moment before revealing your true desires. "I just haven’t… ever… done something," you softly admitted, feeling your cheeks slowly flush.

And once more, Joe offered nothing but a gentle smile. "y/n, you don’t have to feel embarrassed about being a virgin…"

His words eased your anxiety a little. "Really?"

"Of course not! Honestly, I can only respect that choice, y/n," Joe added tenderly. "Just promise me you'll tell me if I ever cross a line…"

"Oh Joe, you're not! And to be honest, I really do want… more… it's just… I don’t know how," you admitted once again, your voice barely above a whisper.

Joe remained silent for a moment, considering how to proceed. It was no secret he desired you; his body language spoke louder than words after all. Yet, the last thing he wanted was to make you feel pressured into something you didn't want.

"Well, if and when you're ready… I'd like to show you."

Joe had insisted on waiting a few days before taking things further, wanting to ensure you felt ready and not pressured. Which you had reassured him countless times. And finally, the night arrived when you would share your most intimate self with him.

You had naturally heard a lot from girlfriends, so you had some idea of what to expect, yet you couldn't help but feel a little nervous. You'd be completely naked, and Joe would touch your most private areas.

But of course, he had gone out of his way to make you feel at ease. With candlelight and soft piano tunes, he had set a comfortable atmosphere at his home, aiming to keep it romantic and gentle.

And he had succeeded. As soon as he gently took your hand and led you to the bedroom after a casual dinner, all sorts of anxiety washed away. He was nothing but sweet and caring. Guiding you to lie on the bed, he kissed you deeply, his hand gently cradling your face as your lips moved together. His tongue politely sought permission to enter, and you welcomed it eagerly.

You felt incredible under Joe's touch. The way he carefully moved his hands around your body, gently massaging you as he pulled you closer to him, felt nothing short of amazing.

And Joe took his time with you, making sure you felt at ease as he kept the kiss deep and passionate, gradually feeling himself becoming aroused too.

Then, breaking the kiss momentarily, his eyes locked onto yours. "Are you certain about this?" He asked softly, to which you gave him a sweet smile and nodded.

"Yes, Joe," you replied, your voice soft and tender, yet tinged with excitement. With your consent, Joe positioned himself between your legs, kneeling as he guided you to relax completely. His gaze remained fixed on you, ensuring he would notice any hint of discomfort.

Then, gently, he began to move his large palms up under your shirt, feeling your smooth skin against his soft hands, before he encouraged you to sit up slightly so he could pull your shirt over your head. As you sat with your breasts exposed in your lacy bra, carefully chosen for the occasion, Joe remembered to kiss you again.

Giving him a smile, you signalled for him to continue. Still with his lips on yours, he used his skilled fingers to unclasp your bra. Although it looked good on you, Joe wanted to feel your skin against his. Your breasts were perfectly round and your nipples hard, indicating your arousal. He then guided you to lie back down as he slowly moved his lips to your neck, placing gentle kisses while his hand massaged your breast.

"Does that feel nice?" Joe murmured against the sensitive skin of your neck, sending a delightful shiver through you.

"Y-yes," you muttered, feeling yourself yielding more and more to him.

"Good, just relax," he spoke tenderly, before shifting to the other side of your neck and attending to your other breast with his hands.

"Mmm," you softly moaned, surprising yourself as you melted into his touch.

Being with Joe was truly wonderful. Already, you felt remarkably at ease under his touch, and you almost couldn't wait for him to proceed further.

Yet he maintained a leisurely pace. With care, he withdrew his tantalising lips, moving to kneel beside you, before he located the button on your jeans with his fingers. Skilfully, he unfastened them and slowly pulled them down your legs, revealing your matching lacy underwear.

You felt a twinge of embarrassment at being so exposed to Joe, yet somehow, he made you feel comfortable, creating a calming atmosphere in the room.

Returning to your lips, he gently planted another kiss. "If it makes you more comfortable, you can slip under the covers while I undress," he suggested, his voice incredibly soothing. And with a soft nod, you complied, while he slowly undressed as well, revealing his erect member.

You couldn't help but gasp as you beheld his size, proudly standing against his lower torso. It appeared quite large to you, though lacking any real comparison. All you could ponder was how it would fit inside you, as you had only experimented with your fingers a few times, and they didn't even come close to his dimensions.

Joe seemed to sense your slight astonishment. "Don’t worry, I'll make sure you're comfortable," he reassured you, returning to the mattress and joining you under the covers, where he once again connected your lips in a tender kiss.

Gradually, you relaxed once more, his calm demeanour rubbing off on you with each passionate motion. And as Joe slowly moved to remove your final piece of fabric, exposing your heat to him, he broke the kiss, yet keeping his gaze fixed on you at all times. Carefully, he encircled his long fingers around your core, smoothing your skin as he inched closer to your sensitive flesh.

Then reconnecting your lips, he delicately trailed his fingers between your folds, gently caressing your sensitive bud and lightly probing your entrance. You released a small breath, briefly breaking the kiss, before resuming as you felt the pleasurable sensations he was inducing.

And only when Joe felt you were completely at ease did, he let his fingers tenderly stroke your clit, sending small sparks of pleasure through your body. Your hands instinctively reached for his hair, intensifying the kiss as you felt a new wave of excitement beginning to build.

"Does it feel good, sweetheart?" He whispered softly into the kiss, and all you could manage was to moan in response. "Good…"

Joe couldn't help but relish the way you lightly moaned and shifted under his touch. All he desired was to ensure he brought you pleasure, and from the way your fingers tangled in his hair, he took it as a positive sign.

Breaking the kiss once more, he pulled back to observe your expression while gently applying a little more pressure as he circled your clit. Then noticing your moans becoming more rapid and uninhibited, he sensed that you were experiencing the pleasure he aimed to provide you.

And indeed, you were. The knot in your lower abdomen tightened as Joe continued to tease your nerve endings, and soon you felt your legs trembling lightly, losing all sense of control. Your hands shifted to grip onto his shoulders as the intensity within you heightened, and soon you realised this must be what an orgasm felt like.

"Oh… Joe…" you softly moaned, closing your eyes tightly as he maintained a steady rhythm, bringing you closer to climax. "Yes…"

And before long, you felt a small spasm wash over your body, as you allowed yourself to succumb to the moment, your mind enveloped in a blissful haze.

Joe couldn't help but smile as he witnessed the pleasure, he was bringing you. "Did you enjoy that?" He chuckled lightly, though he already knew the answer, as he withdrew his fingers slightly.

"Yes," you simply breathed out as you slowly came down from your high.

There was a tender moment lingering, yet the air was thick with steamy desire. Then, with his eyes still locked onto yours, Joe slowly let his fingers slip further down, gently stroking your moist flesh as he approached your entrance. He studied your face, ensuring you still felt relaxed under his touch.

And when he noticed your controlled breathing, he slowly pressed a finger against your opening, gently pushing as he felt your tight walls around it.

“Mmm…” you moaned softly. Even with just one finger, it felt much better than anything you'd ever tried on your own.

And Joe felt rather satisfied with how well it was going, how wet you were, which had been part of his intention when bringing you to climax first. And as he observed your face showing small signs of pleasure, he slowly added a second finger, ensuring it felt good while also gently stretching you.

Despite feeling his own arousal building, his cock throbbing and slick with pre-cum, his primary focus was on your need. And as he felt your wetness coating his fingers, your walls tightening around his digits as he stimulated you, he thought that you might be ready for him soon.

Your fingers lightly dug into his shoulders as you savoured the pleasurable sensation of his fingers inside you. However, the more he massaged your insides, the more you yearned for him. Another small knot was slowly forming in your stomach once more, and now as you understood what it meant, you felt an even deeper desire to be satisfied.

“Joe…” you softly mumbled between moans. “Please, I want you…”

And your wish was his command. “Alright,” he whispered in your ear, before gently withdrawing his fingers from your core, leaving you feeling a bit empty, yet filled with anticipation.

Then kneeling back, he leaned over to the nightstand where he retrieved a condom packet, carefully tearing it open before sheathing himself. Your eyes followed his every move attentively, your core patiently waiting to be fulfilled.

Hovering over you once more, Joe positioned himself in missionary, his gaze still locked on you as he aligned himself with your entrance. “Let me know if it hurts,” he spoke firmly, earning a nod of confirmation from you. Your hands found their way to the back of his shoulders again, your eyes deeply connected with his as he slowly eased his length inside you.

“Oh… God…” you muttered under your breath as his member stretched your tight walls.

Joe felt nothing but pleasure as he filled you up, slowly reaching the very depths of your insides before he paused. Both of you needed a moment to catch your breath; you were overly stimulated, while Joe needed to exercise restraint. The sensation of you around his sensitive member was heavenly, and he felt a surge of pride being the first one you let in.

“I’m going to start moving, okay?” he softly inquired, earning another nod from you. And then very carefully, he withdrew a little before pushing back in, and then again, very slowly. Your nails almost dug into his skin as you felt the exquisite stimulation of his cock against your walls, your mind drifting into another blissful haze and your vision slowly blurring.

And Joe soon found a steady rhythm that brought you both pleasure, still slow and cautious as he didn’t want to overwhelm you. However, as your moans gradually grew louder with every thrust, he found it increasingly difficult to hold back. Gradually, he began to increase the pace, your wetness allowing him to slide in and out effortlessly.

“Mmmm… yes, oh…” he muttered under his breath as he rocked his hips against you, his cock throbbing with every motion. Similarly, you felt your core dripping and pulsating as he made love to you.

“Joe… Mmm… I think- I think I’m going to…” you couldn’t even finish your sentence as a rush of pleasure coursed through your mind, body, and soul, his length guiding you to another orgasm, your eyes closing as you surrendered to the euphoria once more.

Which only brought Joe closer to his own climax as your tight walls clenched around him, his pace picking up once more. He had to close his eyes as well as he felt himself about to reach the peak, and with a few more thrusts, he finally let out a deep grunt and surrendered to his climax.

“Oh yes…” he moaned loudly, allowing himself to thrust slowly and deeply a couple of times as he released into the latex.

There was another moment of silence as you both regained control of your breaths, your hearts beating faster as you slowly returned to reality from the euphoric state.

Pearls of sweat had formed on Joe’s forehead, his eyes opening again to meet yours in a romantic gaze.

“Was that alright?” he softly inquired with a crooked smile, and you couldn’t help but let out a small laugh.

“Joe, it was absolutely wonderful,” you flashed him a satisfied smile. And for another few seconds, you allowed yourselves to just enjoy the intimate moment.

“Good…” he returned your satisfied smile. “Just try to relax, sweetheart, and I’ll be right back,” he informed you with a soft tone before carefully withdrawing his length from your core. Offering him a nod, you watched as he walked to the bathroom to dispose of the condom.

And while he was cleaning himself up, you couldn’t help but feel a surge of happiness wash over you. Your mind still basking in bliss as you reflected on tonight and how sweet and gentle Joe had been, how understanding and caring he had shown himself to be.

It hadn’t been painful at all, contrary to what some of your friends had warned. Instead, Joe had taken his time to ensure you felt nothing but pleasure, even bringing you to your very first two orgasms.

As you lay there in the romantic yet passionate ambiance, a smile played on your lips. And as Joe returned to the bed, he wore an equally contented smile, a damp cloth in his hand, which he delicately used to help you clean your juices from between your legs.

It was nothing short of an amazing evening, the way Joseph helped you explore your own body and desires, followed by him offering you a t-shirt to sleep in and whispering sweet nothings as you simply lay in his embrace. You chatted for a brief while, both of you wearing broad smiles, as he tenderly caressed every inch of your body, still ensuring you felt relaxed and comfortable even after making love. And as satisfaction filled your mind and body, tiredness descended upon you both, and gradually you drifted off to sleep in each other’s warm embrace.

As morning slowly crept in, you still felt a lingering sense of pleasure in your core. And what made your early smile widen even more was waking up spooning with Joe, his large frame enveloping you, while his morning wood pressed against your back.

And sensing your slight movements, Joe also slowly stirred from his slumber.

“Morning,” he softly murmured into your hair, planting a gentle kiss as he held you close.

“Morning,” you replied with a husky morning voice, before turning around in his arms, your tired gaze meeting his.

“Did you sleep well?”

“Oh, I think we both know I slept wonderfully,” you let out a light chuckle. “How about you?”

“Hmm, I slept well too, especially with you in my arms…”

You couldn’t help but smile as your eyes remained locked. “Did you have any… uhm, dreams about me?” you inquired, slightly mischievously.

“Hmm, not specifically,” Joe chuckled lightly, propping his head on his elbow. “Why?”

“Oh, well then you must just be really happy to have me here…” you teased sweetly, hinting at his once again firm member tucked away in his boxers.

“Yeah, that’s kind of normal,” he chuckled again. “But that doesn’t mean I’m not happy to have you here,” he added, smiling before leaning in for a tender kiss.

“Hmm,” you hummed into the kiss before pulling back slightly, your mind filled with desire for the man lying beside you. “Well… maybe… it deserves a little attention…” you sweetly suggested.

“Oh, you're already up for round two?” Joe grinned playfully, pulling you a little closer to his warm body.

“Maybe…” you admitted softly. “I guess it was just that good…”

And Joe couldn’t exactly disagree with you. Flashing you a flirtatious smile, he then kissed you again, this time in a deeper and more passionate manner, before pulling apart.

“Well, then I guess I shouldn’t keep you waiting, miss,” he said with a smile before attending to your desires with a playful chuckle.

#my asks #18+ smut #joseph woll smut #joseph woll imagine #toronto maple leafs imagine #nhl hockey imagine

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paloma-ascends-into-hellfire · 7 months

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eating disorder harm reduction

no one ever compiled this so that it what we are doing today. for people with eds and people whose loved ones do. please note: i’m not a doctor. this is a compilation of things from books and ed resource sites.

for people whose loved ones have an eating disorder:

try to make sure they know these things.

try not to force them to eat, they might feel uncomfortable eating in front of people. also, risk of refeeding syndrome.

if their life is in danger and you are seeking help for them, consult the person beforehand to make sure they will be safe and give them a heads-up so that they aren’t startled (especially if they’re neurodivergent! giving them notice will aid control!)

offer them ways of controlling things aside from food - practice consent, include them in conversations, don’t talk about them behind their back, compliment their makeup or hair.

be patient. the person may be irritable from lack of sleep, feelings of depression, worthlessness, etc., or malnutrition.

keep in mind that you can’t tell if someone has an eating disorder by looking at them. people of all weights do - only 17% of anorexics are underweight - and also, men and non binary people can also have eds.

general:

drink lots of water, especially if you’re drinking lots of caffeine.

drink some electrolytes at least once a week - gatorade, electrolyte tablets, coconut water, doesn’t matter, just get it into your system.

if you are getting dizzy or flushed and can feel your heart beating, quick carbs will raise your blood sugar - sweets, bread, fruit, juice, non diet soda, whatever. keep snacks around pls.

your brain uses 400-500 calories daily. eat more than this.

take your supplements!

you still need protein, have an egg or something.

don’t take adderal or insulin unless you are actually diabetic or neurodivergent, because you are raising the price by buying them and denying access to those who need it.

throw a towel over the mirror. it’s not worth it if it’ll cause you anxiety.

try to limit disordered behaviours like body checking, purging, and weigh ins.

practice good dental hygiene.

put your scale somewhere where you have to actively look for it to weigh yourself.

avoid social media and for your sake don’t go on pro ed tiktok or tumblr or twitter or insta.

get a buddy who also struggles with the same thing if possible to support each other.

get regular medical check ups (if you can afford it)

practice things within your control - makeup, hair, clothing, etc.

push your rules - eat 5 minutes before your time, or 50 calories over your limit.

for people with restrictive disorders (e.g. anorexia):

do weight and resistance training at least twice a week to prevent musculoskeletal conditions such as osteoporosis.

don’t drink on an empty stomach.

try to put gaps between fasting periods.

don’t fast for more than 72 hours.

wear lots of layers to keep warm.

eat an extra 100-200 calories on your period if you menstruate.

have a metabolism day.

take care of your hair.

as horrifying as this is to many people, please go to the hospital if you’re experiencing heart problems or if you’re passing out for more than 30 seconds.

for people with purging disorders (e.g. bulimia):

if you would like to purge, wait 15 minutes first.

after purging: drink lots of water - the emptiness you feel is dehydration. don’t brush your teeth but rinse your mouth out, preferably with an alkaline mouthwash or baking soda mixed into water. do something you want to do, like reading a book or watching a show. don’t smoke. don’t have anything acidic. eat a banana or some chocolate or a rice cake to keep your blood sugar levels in check.

if you vomit blood or your vomit looks like coffee grounds, this is a sign of internal bleeding. you could be drowning in your own blood from a hole in your esophagus, essentially. go to the hospital or call 911/999/the emergency number in your area.

stay safe everyone. i hope this helps. also, i do not use these tags - i have them blocked - but i am using them so that people on these tags will find this because they need it most.

#ed harm reduction #harm reduction #ed recovery #pro recovery #notpro4n4 #tw eating disorders #tw ed not ed sheeren #pro a4a #ana trigger #ana rant #tw anorexia #tw bulimia #anamia #⭐️ving #edhr

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jakesaverse · 3 months

Text

ECHOES OF YESTERDAY | JAKE SIM CH.3

Synopsis: On her 21st birthday, Y/n wakes up overwhelmed by guilt and sorrow. It’s not just her birthday; it’s also the third anniversary of her high school boyfriend Jake’s tragic death. Surviving the accident that took Jake’s life, Y/n is haunted by memories of their love and the future they lost. In a moment of desperate longing, she makes a wish to see Jake again and is miraculously transported back in time to when Jake was alive. However, she finds that Jake now hates her, adding a new layer of pain and confusion. Determined to change his fate and earn his tolerance, she resolves to do everything in her power to ensure he escapes death this time.

Reader: Jake x reader

Authors note: Hello! I know it’s been awhile since I’ve uploaded or really updated about my process and I am SOOOO sorry 😭. I’ve had a pretty rough writers block right after I posted my second chapter. And I’m still having it but it’s slowly getting better ❤️‍🩹. This chapter is more on the emotional side ( all of them have been but yk what I mean I hope). Also, this is meant to be slow burn so please keep that in mind. Anyways, thank you for your patience and hopefully it was worth the wait 🥰! Thank you for your support 🫶🫶!!

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Jake jolted awake, drenched in sweat, his heart pounding like a drum in his chest. The remnants of the nightmare clung to his mind, vivid and tormenting. He could still see the shadows closing in, suffocating him, and the echo of Y/N's words, "I’m trying to save you," haunting his every thought.

He sat up, gasping for air, and looked around his dimly lit room. The broken mirror on the wall caught his eye, a cruel reminder of his earlier outburst. Anger and despair had driven him to punch it, shattering both the glass and a piece of himself.

Jake's hand trembled as he reached for the first aid kit on his bedside table. His wrist was still bleeding, the pain sharp and relentless. He wrapped the bandage around it, each twist of the fabric feeling like a futile attempt to hold himself together.

As he tightened the bandage, tears welled up in his eyes. He couldn't escape the image of the man in the mirror—so lost, so alone. The reflection was a stark contrast to the facade he showed the world. In truth, he was drowning in his own isolation, burdened by the weight of his past and the guilt that gnawed at his soul.

Y/N's words echoed louder now, cutting through the silence of the room. "I’m trying to save you ." At first, he had dismissed her as crazy, but now those words felt like a lifeline. Why did he need to be saved? What did she see in him that he couldn't see in himself?

Jake's thoughts spiraled as he tried to make sense of it all. He thought about his life, the constant feeling of not being enough, and the relentless self-blame. He had pushed everyone away, convinced that he didn't deserve their love or friendship. The loneliness was suffocating.

And yet, Y/N's words had pierced through his defenses. Despite everything, they had reached him. Maybe, just maybe, she was right. Maybe he did need saving—from his anger, his guilt, and the darkness that consumed him.

As he looked at the shattered mirror, Jake made a silent vow. He would find out what Y/N meant. He would confront his demons and try to understand why he needed to be saved. It was a small glimmer of hope in an otherwise bleak existence, but it was enough to keep him going.

Sunghoon arrived at Jake's apartment early in the morning, the sun barely peeking over the horizon. He had been worried about Jake ever since their last conversation. Jake had seemed distant, lost in his thoughts, and Sunghoon knew all too well how his friend tended to shut down if he didn't talk about what was bothering him.

Quietly, Sunghoon pulled out the spare key Jake had given him for emergencies and let himself in. He carried a bag of food, hoping that a warm meal might help lift Jake's spirits. As he stepped inside, he was struck by the silence and the disarray. The broken mirror, the scattered shards of glass, and the overall mess painted a clear picture of Jake's turmoil.

Sunghoon found Jake slumped on the couch, looking disheveled and exhausted. His eyes immediately went to the bandaged wrist, the blood seeping through the white fabric. Sunghoon's heart sank.

"Jake, what the hell happened?" Sunghoon's voice was a mix of concern and frustration as he set the bag of food on the table and rushed to his friend's side.

Jake looked up, startled. "Sunghoon? How did you—"

"I used the spare key. I was worried about you." Sunghoon gestured to the bandage. "You hurt yourself again. You can't keep doing this, Jake."

Jake sighed, his head in his hands. "It's nothing, Sunghoon. Just had a rough night."

"Nothing? This is not nothing!" Sunghoon's voice softened as he sat beside Jake. "Talk to me. What's going on? You can't keep bottling this up. It's eating you alive."

For a moment, there was silence. Jake struggled to find the words, his emotions a tangled mess. Finally, he looked up, his eyes filled with pain. "I had a nightmare. It felt so real, and I woke up feeling... broken. I can't shake this feeling, Sunghoon. I feel like I'm drowning in my own thoughts, and I don't know how to stop it."

Sunghoon placed a reassuring hand on Jake's shoulder. "You don't have to go through this alone, Jake. I'm here for you. We all are. But you need to let us in. You need to talk about what's going on inside your head."

Jake nodded slowly, tears brimming in his eyes. "I know. It's just so hard. I feel like I'm not enough, like I'm always failing."

"You're not failing, Jake. You're human. We all have our struggles, but we face them together. You don't have to carry this burden by yourself."

Jake took a deep breath, the weight on his chest feeling a little lighter. "Thanks, Sunghoon. I don't know what I'd do without you."

Sunghoon smiled, giving Jake's shoulder a gentle squeeze. "You'll never have to find out. Now, let's get that wrist properly cleaned up, and then we'll figure this out together. One step at a time."

As Sunghoon helped Jake with his bandage and then unpacked the food, a sense of hope began to bloom in the room. It wasn't a solution to all of Jake's problems, but it was a start. And sometimes, that's all you need to begin healing.

Sunghoon sat across from Jake, he was talking about their plans for the upcoming weekend, but he noticed Jake's eyes drifting away, staring blankly out the window. Sunghoon knew this look all too well. Jake often spaced out like this when he was really struggling with something heavy on his mind.

Sunghoon's voice softened, careful not to startle Jake out of his thoughts. "You know, Jake, it's been a while since we went to the beach. How about we get some fresh air?"

Jake blinked, his focus slowly returning to the present. "The beach?"

"Yeah," Sunghoon said with a gentle smile. "It could be good for you. We can invite Jay too. Just the three of us, like old times."

Jake's lips curved into a small, grateful smile. "That sounds nice."

Sunghoon pulled out his phone and quickly sent a text to Jay. Within moments, Jay replied with an enthusiastic "I'm in!"

"Jay's on board," Sunghoon said, standing up and offering his hand to Jake. "Let's go."

They gathered their things and headed out the door. The drive to the beach was filled with light chatter, mostly led by Sunghoon, with Jake giving occasional nods or short responses. Sunghoon didn't mind; he was just glad to see a hint of relaxation in Jake's demeanor.

When they arrived at the beach, Jay was already there, waving at them with a big grin. "Hey, guys!"

"Hey, Jay!" Sunghoon called back, returning the wave.

Jake managed a small smile as they joined Jay by the water. The sound of the waves crashing against the shore and the salty breeze seemed to lift some of the weight off Jake's shoulders. For a moment, he felt a sense of peace.

They walked along the shore, the sand cool beneath their feet. Jay, always the joker, started telling funny stories about their school days, trying to coax a laugh out of Jake. Sunghoon watched as a small spark of amusement flickered in Jake's eyes.

"Remember that time we tried to build the biggest sandcastle and ended up with more sand on ourselves than on the castle?" Jay said, laughing.

Jake chuckled softly, the sound like music to Sunghoon's ears. "Yeah, and we were so proud of that lopsided thing."

Sunghoon joined in the laughter, feeling a warmth spread through his chest. "We should try building another one today. What do you say, Jake?"

Jake looked at his friends, feeling a swell of gratitude. "Yeah, let's do it."

They spent the afternoon building a sandcastle, their laughter mingling with the sound of the waves. For a while, Jake forgot about his troubles, lost in the simple joy of being with his friends. As the sun began to set, painting the sky in hues of orange and pink, they sat down on the sand, watching the horizon.

"Thanks, guys," Jake said quietly, his voice filled with emotion. "I really needed this."

Sunghoon wrapped an arm around Jake's shoulders. "We're always here for you, Jake. No matter what."

Jay nodded, his expression serious for once. "Yeah, man. We're a trio. We stick together."

Jake felt tears prick at the corners of his eyes, but he didn't try to hide them. He let them fall, feeling the warmth of his friends' presence. In that moment, he knew he wasn't alone. He had Sunghoon and Jay by his side, and that made all the difference.

You stood motionless in front of the bridge, the biting wind whispering secrets of the past as it brushed against your skin. The bridge held a profound significance, a silent witness to a night that had changed everything. You could still feel the weight of that evening, the crushing despair that had driven you to the edge.

It was late, the kind of late where the world seems to hold its breath. You had been ready to let go, to escape the relentless pain that had become your constant companion. You had stepped onto the bridge, your heart pounding, your mind a chaotic storm. The darkness below had seemed inviting, a final respite from your suffering.

But then, out of the shadows, Jake had appeared. His presence had been like a beacon, a light cutting through your darkest hour.

"Y/N, please don't," he had called out, his voice trembling with fear and love. He had approached you slowly, his eyes never leaving yours. "You don't have to do this. You're not alone. I'm here with you."

Jake had wrapped you in his arms, holding you with a strength that belied his own fears. His embrace had been warm, a sanctuary where your broken pieces could find solace. He had whispered words of comfort, of hope, convincing you that your life was worth living. That night, he had saved you, pulling you back from the brink.

But now, as you stood before the bridge once more, Jake was gone. He had died, leaving a void that nothing could fill. The memory of his sacrifice haunted you, a constant reminder of your guilt. You had never wanted to live, yet Jake had fought so hard for your life. And now, he was dead, and you were still here, drowning in a sea of remorse.

The tears began to fall, slowly at first, then in an uncontrollable torrent. You sank to your knees, your sobs echoing in the emptiness around you. The guilt was overwhelming, the pain unbearable. It felt as if your heart was shattering into a thousand pieces, each one cutting deeper than the last.

"Jake, I'm so sorry," you whispered through your tears. "I miss you so much. Why did you save me?"

The wind continued to blow, carrying your words into the void. You clutched at your chest, the ache of loss and regret consuming you. You remembered his smile, the way his eyes had sparkled with life, and the way he had always known just what to say to make you feel better. But now, those memories were all you had left.

You cried until you had no more tears to shed, your body trembling with the force of your grief. In the stillness that followed, you felt a faint sense of release, as if your tears had washed away a part of the burden you carried. You knew that Jake would never truly be gone, that he lived on in your heart and in the memories you had shared.

As you stood up, you took a deep breath, feeling the cool air fill your lungs. You looked out over the bridge, the place where Jake had saved your life, and you made a silent promise to him. You would try to live, not just for yourself, but for him. You would carry his memory with you, letting it guide you through the darkness.

Jake stepped out of Sunghoon's car, waving a tired goodbye to his friends. The night air was cool against his skin, a stark contrast to the warmth of the car's interior. Despite his exhaustion, he felt a restless energy coursing through him. He knew he needed to clear his head, so he decided to take a walk, even though it was pretty late.

The streets were eerily quiet, the only sounds being the occasional rustle of leaves and the distant hum of traffic. Jake walked aimlessly, his thoughts a jumbled mess of regrets and what-ifs. He found himself heading towards the bridge, a place he often went to when he needed to think, to escape, to breathe.

As he approached, he noticed a figure standing by the railing. It took him a moment to realize it was Y/N. She was crying, her shoulders shaking with each sob, the sound barely audible but piercing through the night. Jake's first instinct was to turn around and leave her to her privacy, but something stopped him. He saw himself in her—broken and lost. The raw emotion on her face mirrored the turmoil he felt inside.

Despite everything she had done to get under his skin, he couldn't just leave her there, struggling alone. Taking a deep breath, he walked over to her, his footsteps soft against the pavement. Each step felt like a mile, the weight of the moment pressing down on him.

"Y/N," he called out gently, his voice almost a whisper.

She looked up, startled, and quickly tried to recompose herself, wiping away her tears with trembling hands. But as soon as she saw him, the facade crumbled. Her eyes, red and swollen, filled with fresh tears. Without thinking, she lunged forward, wrapping her arms around him in a desperate hug. Jake stood still for a moment, surprised, but then he felt her body shaking against his, her sobs muffled against his chest.

He hesitated, then slowly brought his arms around her, holding her as she broke down. They stood there for what felt like an eternity, the night wrapping around them like a comforting blanket. The world around them seemed to fade away, leaving just the two of them in their shared pain.

Jake could feel her tears soaking through his shirt, her grip on him tightening as if she was afraid he would disappear. He gently rested his chin on top of her head, his own eyes stinging with unshed tears. He didn't know what to say, didn't know if there were any words that could ease her pain. So he just held her, letting her cry, letting her release the torrent of emotions that had been building up inside her.

"You're not alone," he whispered finally, his voice breaking. "I'm here."

Y/N's sobs grew louder, more anguished, as if his words had opened a floodgate. She clung to him, her body shaking with the force of her crying. Jake tightened his hold on her, his heart aching for her, for them both. In that moment, all the resentment, all the anger he had harbored towards her seemed to dissolve, replaced by a deep, aching empathy.

They stood there for what felt like hours, the night growing colder around them. Eventually, Y/N's sobs began to subside, her breathing becoming more even. She pulled back slightly, looking up at him with tear-filled eyes.

"Thank you," she whispered, her voice hoarse.

Jake nodded, brushing a strand of hair away from her face. "Anytime," he replied softly.

They stood there in silence, the bridge their silent witness, the night their only companion. For the first time in a long while, Jake felt a sense of purpose. He didn't have the answers, didn't know what the future held, but for now, being there for Y/N was enough.

You and Jake walked side by side, the dim streetlights casting long shadows on the pavement. The silence between you was thick, but not uncomfortable. You reached the nearest shop that was still open, a small convenience store with a flickering neon sign that buzzed faintly in the cool night air.

"I'm going to get something to drink. Do you want anything?" Jake asked, his voice breaking the silence. There was a softness in his tone that made your heart ache.

You shook your head. "No, I'm good."

Jake raised an eyebrow but didn't press further. He disappeared into the store, leaving you standing outside, your thoughts racing. You couldn't tell him the truth—that you had traveled back in time to save him. How could you explain something so unbelievable?

As you waited, memories of the accident flooded your mind. The screeching tires, the shattering glass, and the overwhelming sense of helplessness. You squeezed her eyes shut, trying to push the images away, but they clung to you like shadows.

A few minutes later, Jake emerged with a bottle of water and a small bag of chips. He handed the chips to you. "I know you said you didn't want anything, but I got these for you anyway."

You took the bag hesitantly, your fingers brushing against his. "Thanks," you whispered, your voice barely audible.

You started walking back, the crunch of gravel under your feet the only sound. Jake glanced at you sideways, his brow furrowed with concern. "So, why did you say I needed to be saved?"

Your heart skipped a beat. You had to think fast. "Oh, I was just... you know, being dramatic. I didn't mean anything by it."

Jake stopped walking and turned to face you, his eyes searching yours. "You don't have to lie to me, Y/N. I can tell something's been bothering you."

Tears welled up in your eyes, but you blinked them away. "It's nothing, really. Just... a lot on my mind."

Jake reached out and gently touched your arm, his expression softening. He wasn't your biggest fan, mainly because it always seemed like you had your life together, and he couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy. He knew it was wrong to assume and dislike you for that, but those feelings had lingered for so long.

However, when he saw you a couple of minutes ago, with that same look and feeling he had been battling his whole life, something inside him shifted. The realization hit him like a ton of bricks—how much of a jerk he had been. Jake's heart ached with regret as he looked at you, finally understanding the weight of his misguided resentment.

"You can talk to me, you know. I'm here for you."

You felt a lump in your throat. You wanted to tell him everything, to unburden yourself of the secret that weighed so heavily on your heart. But you couldn't. Not yet. Instead, you forced a smile. "Thanks, Jake. That means a lot."

You continued walking in silence, the tension between you palpable. As you guys neared the corner where you would part ways, Jake stopped and turned to you, his expression serious.

"We should probably figure out when to meet up for the project," he said, breaking the moment you had shared.

You nodded, grateful for the change in topic. "Yeah, how about tomorrow after school?"

"Sounds good," Jake replied. He hesitated for a moment, then added, "And if you ever need to talk, I'm here. Anytime."

Your heart ached at his kindness. At the kindness you haven’t been able to witness for a couple of years now. “Thanks, Jake. I'll remember that."

As you went your separate ways, you couldn't help but feel a pang of sadness. You wanted to tell him the truth, but you knew you couldn't. Not yet. For now, you would have to carry the weight of your secret alone.

Jake sat alone in his room, the weight of his actions crashing down on him with unbearable force. He had always prided himself on being strong, on keeping his emotions in check, but now he felt like he was unraveling. He had misjudged Y/N so badly, and the realization of how much he had hurt her was like a punch to the gut.

Tears welled up in his eyes as he thought about all the times he had let his resentment and jealousy guide his actions. He had been so blinded by his own insecurities that he failed to see the pain he was causing someone else. Y/N didn't deserve any of it. She was just trying to navigate her own struggles, and he had made it so much harder for her.

Jake's heart ached as he remembered the look on her face, the vulnerability he had overlooked. He had always managed to hurt people, even when he didn't mean to. It was like a curse he couldn't escape. The guilt was suffocating, and he couldn't hold back the tears any longer. He broke down, sobbing quietly in the darkness of his room.

He glanced at his injured hand, which he had managed to hide earlier. The pain was a constant reminder of his own mistakes. Tomorrow, he would have to figure out how to hide it at school. He didn't want anyone to see his weakness, especially not Y/N. He had already caused her enough pain.

But as he sat there, crying and clutching his injured hand, Jake realized that hiding his pain wasn't the answer. He needed to make things right, to show Y/N that he was truly sorry. It wouldn't be easy, and he knew it would take time, but he was determined to change. He couldn't keep hurting the people around him, especially not Y/N.

With a heavy heart, Jake wiped away his tears and made a silent promise to himself. Tomorrow, he would start making amends. He didn't know how, but he would find a way to show Y/N that he was sorry, that he wanted to be better. For her, and for himself.

taglist: @belovedsthings @en-chantedtomeetyou @syazzzlisa @k1ttylvr @jaeyunpinkyring-deactivated2024 @dreamiestay @soobs-things @capri-cuntz @beomgyusimp @heelariously @thinkinboutbin @jyunsgf @lwavander @chaewonshoney @maliakealoha @addictedtohobi @likeemilia @shaniandme @chocminteu @lilyuwon @kgneptun @dojaejunging @binniesbabe @asteria-wood

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covid-safer-hotties · 17 days

Text

Back in early 2020, the news of the strange illness causing terrible pneumonias in China saddened me, but I believed I was safe in Canada. Within weeks, there was a reckoning: thousands were dying on my doorstep, too.

Directors of an independent living residence at the start of the pandemic asked me to become the residence’s COVID-19 advisor. They had no qualified medical staff, despite supporting elderly residents. Back in those early days, anyone with a medical qualification was commandeered to help in any way they could.

Confronted with the task of providing guidance to the nonmedical staff taking care of these residents, I decided to learn everything I could about the pandemic. At that time, about 1,000 papers were being published every month detailing research into every aspect of the coronavirus. Of course, I couldn’t read all of them, but I read as many as I could and built a breadth and depth of evidenced-based knowledge about SARS-CoV-2 and COVID-19. I wrote up the protocols and during my tenure as COVID-19 Advisor for this residence, we kept COVID out.

As a family physician seeing COVID-19 in my practice, I came to recognize that so many of my colleagues and patients had no idea how to keep themselves safe from the coronavirus, nor were they aware of its long-term risks. I saw the need to take action and effect change, which ultimately led me to becoming an advocate for Long COVID awareness.

I started the medical education company Kojala Medical, aiming to provide evidenced-based information about medical issues in a form patients could understand and reliably trust. I wanted a credible, trustworthy site to which I could refer my patients, colleagues, friends and family. We started with a focus on COVID-19 and have now expanded to Long COVID, with the site longcovidtheanswers.com.

I first learned about Long COVID in 2020 through publicity raised by the Body Politic COVID-19 support group, then became more alarmed as I read scientific articles about the disease.

Aside from the official death toll of over 7 million from COVID-19, Long COVID has emerged from the pandemic as the single biggest disaster to afflict humanity, yet very few people who are not sick with Long COVID are aware of it, want to know about it, believe in it, or even acknowledge that it’s happening. Sadly, many in the medical profession fall within that group of non and disbelievers.

This is bizarre, especially because of the impact of the disease. One recent review estimates more than 400 million global cases of Long COVID. I am furious that not enough is being done to alleviate this suffering. The injustice of yet another neglected and marginalized chronic illness that disproportionately affects women.

So, rather than sitting around waiting for ‘someone’ or ‘body’ to do something, I decided to act.

For me, medicine is fundamentally about aiding people to get as well as possible from any sickness they have — and even more importantly, preventing people from getting sick in the first place. In both of these regards, we are failing people with Long COVID dismally.

Long COVID is not the flu, it is a multisystem debilitating infection associated chronic condition. Developing Long COVID can be disabling and life-changing. Recovery remains low — and some manifestations like heart disease, dysautonomia, and myalgic encephalomyelitis (ME) may last a lifetime.

This is a terrifying situation to be in when, as a global community, we have chosen to act as though the pandemic is over and repeatedly expose ourselves to SARS-CoV-2, a grade 3 biohazard, with little to no protection.

As I read more and more research papers about Long COVID and looked at the inaction of global governments and my own profession, I feared that we were sleepwalking into a global mass disabling event unnecessarily, since we have many technologies available to prevent this.

Infection-associated chronic conditions do not have an established medical speciality, and are rarely taught in medical school. With the medical profession disengaged, people with Long COVID have been left to find answers for themselves.

My work aims to build on support groups, which have helped establish caring communities for people with Long COVID, but have also paved the way for us as scientists and medics to change the way we conduct research in a more patient-focused way. Nevertheless, they don’t entirely fulfill the need for evidence-based information about the disease in a readable format for nonmedical individuals.

I saw a huge need for a comprehensive website that would be of use to all people with Long COVID, their caregivers, the scientists researching the disease, and the multidisciplinary team of healthcare professionals that would be needed to rehabilitate them. Our organization believes that Long COVID The Answers meets those requirements.

There is also a pressing need to train medical professionals so that they will acknowledge Long COVID and feel confident about diagnosing and managing it. Inspired by an interview with Dr. Ric Arsenaeau, an expert in managing complex chronic diseases, my team and I created a podcast series: so that medical providers can receive continuing professional development/educational credits from watching this series.

The podcast series features a range of experts, including people with Long COVID, doctors, scientists, educators, and medical clinicians. Some of these experts also serve on our advisory board, overlooking and participating in the project.

Our site aims to raise awareness about the dangers of continuously exposing ourselves to a perilous virus with no thought of what it will cost us and our children.

This will mobilize the people of the world to demand that their leaders properly provide safe spaces for us all to prevent us from ever getting infected in the first place.

We need to mandate our governments to access all the mitigating technologies that we have in our roster, not only vaccination. The best way of managing Long COVID is to prevent people getting infected with SARS-CoV-2 in the first place!

We need national and international indoor clean air acts – to protect us from emerging pathogens.

For people with Long COVID, awareness will bring an educated and mobilized medical profession, governmental resources, financial and sociological support, and money for research — to facilitate treatments and, hopefully, a cure.

These are the main reasons why I jump out of bed in the morning with gusto, focus, and determination, and why I’ve poured all my money and my time into educating people about Long COVID.

Dr. Funmi Okunola is a British Family Physician who lives and works in Vancouver, Canada. She is the President and CEO of Kojala Medical, a digital medical education company behind COVID-19 The Answers and Long COVID The Answers.

#long covid #covid #mask up #pandemic #covid 19 #wear a mask #sars cov 2 #public health #coronavirus #still coviding #wear a respirator

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0vereasy · 9 months

Text

Life’s Creation and Love’s Manifestation Chapter 2 - Dr Ratio x Female reader

Summary: Your promotion as one of the heads of the Security Department at Herta’s Space Station was full of many headaches, one of the biggest being a visiting scholar from the Intelligentsia Guild and a delegate of the IPC, Dr. Ratio.

When you were forced to team up with him to solve several crises emerging at the Station, how will your tense relationship change? And what exactly is the Doctor hiding?

A/N: Thanks so much for the support on Chapter 1! Hope Chapter two is just as enjoyable! Note that this contains spoilers for the first half of the Trailblaze question in 1.6, including spoilers about the new boss. The Trailblazer is kept gender neutral so feel free to picture whoever.

AO3 link

Taglist: @96jnie

Comment or send me an ask to be added to the taglist!

Previous Chapter | Masterlist

Chapter 2: Tough Survival

Word count: 7.0k+

“Why exactly do you need to go in the Seclusion Zone again?” you asked, eyebrow raised at the Trailblazer standing beside you in the Storage Zone, you tapping your foot impatiently as you both waited for the elevator to arrive. It was taking longer than usual, the display panel showing the elevator’s current location showed that the metal tube was forced to make the long trip from the bottom of the station back to your location. Your arms were tired of lugging shit around this god-awful Space Station, your full water bottle and heavy-duty laptop making your arms ache as shifting them slightly in your arms from where you stood.

Unfortunately, your comfort was also not aided by the person standing in beside you. In all honesty, the Trailblazer had been giving off weird vibes since their arrival at the Station late last night; even now they wouldn’t meet your eye despite standing beside you, shuffling slightly in their spot. You weren’t the first, and definitely wouldn’t be the last to admit that they weren’t exactly the brightest bulb, but hey, neither would you, and you could tell there was something more to their evasive answers.

“Completely legal business that is completely ethical and not dangerous at all!” they exclaimed, forcing a laugh as they scratched the back of their neck awkwardly. You resisted the urge to roll your eyes as you followed them into the elevator. You turned to watch the doors close, ensuring you were both firmly in the metal carrier before you set your laptop and water bottle down, bending at the waist to do so. You straightened once more, cracking your knuckles. To their credit, the Trailblazer quickly picked up on your action, backing themselves as far away from you as the small metal tube would allow them, “What are you-”

You turned from the elevator door to face them, arms moving up and grabbing them by the collar of their white shirt, pushing them against the back wall of the elevator. Their amber eyes widened in shock at your actions, hands lifting in a vain attempt to pull your own digits from their shirt collar. Your grip only tightened at that, pushing them more firmly into the wall in a way you expected would leave a few bruises.

“Look, I’m trusting you today; you’re the Station’s saviour after all, and you have Madam Ruan Mei’s access card,” your gaze dipped from their golden eyes to the card hanging around their neck, the picture of Ruan Mei gazing back at you as if the Genius was in the elevator right now, mocking you. You moved your face closer to their own, using your hand to tilt their chin down slightly to make sure they looked you in the eye, “But if I find out that you do anything to threaten the safety of the Station while were down there, I won’t hesitate to deal with you myself.” You whispered those last words in their ear after shifting your head to the side slightly. You moved your head back to speak again, “Capeesh?”

“U-Understood, Miss Y/N,” came their studdered response, their face visibly flushed and mouth slightly agape as they stared up at you. You sighed, releasing their shirt, though your body lingered close to their own for a second, keeping them on guard despite your hands lowering to your sides. You bent down once more to pick up your items, though this time you kept your gaze focused on the Trailblazer as you did so before inevitably having to turn your back away from them to face the buttons on the elevator panel.

God, you were getting real tired of pinning people against walls. What was this, twice in one week? Must be a new record, if not it was at least a personal best score.

“Great!” you exclaimed, turning to flash a smile over your shoulder at them. Despite the friendly nature of the action, their body flinched backwards, “Come on, don’t be like that, you know I can’t play bad cop for long,” you shrugged, turning your head back to the button panel,”let’s go then,” you shifted your laptop under your arm so you could grab your key card hanging around your neck, pushing it against the access scanner on the wall of the elevator. A green light flashed on the scanner, approving the descent, while a second green light from a panel above it turned on, the light moving across your face as a robotic voice confirmed your identity. After the light turned off, you pressed the lowest button on the elevator panel, turning to look at your companion again once the elevator started descending, “That’s why the elevator wasn’t moving earlier.”

“H-Huh?” the Trailblazer was still clearly flustered from earlier, as they looked at you blankly as if not truly processing your words, a familiar look for them really. Even from your spot a few feet away from them, you couldn’t mistake the flush on their cheeks or the way they fidgeted slightly with their hands. You allowed yourself to roll your eyes this time, taking a swig from the water bottle in your hand, the ‘water’ burning your throat nicely as it went down.

“Theirs a dual processing system!” you announced proudly after swallowing, turning to look at the panel. You pointed first to the key card scanner, “This device scans a key card,” your finger then moved to the panel above it, “and then this one scans the person’s face to make sure their identity matches the card they scanned!” you turned to look at the Trailblazer again as you leaned against the wall of the elevator with a smirk, crossing your arms confidently, “That’s why it wasn’t working earlier when you tried to use Ruan Mei’s card without me! I designed it after the Legion attack to try and increase Security; I know, I know, I’m a genius.”

“You sure change moods fast, Miss Y/N,” the Trailblazer sighed, though their body language was already slightly more open from before, their amber eyes clearly meeting yours and their feet planted firmly on the ground. You forced down a smile at the change.

“Come on Trailblazer, you know me, I’m not meant to play the serious security roll for long. Like I said, I can only play bad cop for so long before I clinically go insane,” you huffed dramatically, standing up straight so you stop leaning on the metal wall, “Besides, it’s my day off, I threatened you for safety purposes only, obviously.”

The Trailblazer opened their mouth to respond, but their attention was instead caught by the slowing of the elevator as it reached it’s destination. As the doors of the elevator opened, they looked between you and the dark space beyond skeptically, breathing slightly heavily as you took your first few steps into the Zone.

“Why is it… so dark?” The Trailblazer asked you, as you both stepped into the empty corridor. The, elevator ascending back up behind the two of you, leaving the only source of light as the stars and planets beyond the Space Station windows. Compared to the rest of the station at this hour, everything was quiet, as one would expect for a Zone locked away from the public. Your eyes scanned the place as you both walked, lingering at the work station in the distance voluntarily, before you forced your gaze to look at your companion again.

“Energy saving mechanism,” you explained casually, steps large and confident compared to the small skeptical ones of your companion, “you should see Herta’s energy bill, yeesh, I know the IPC have a payday everytime Topaz comes to collect our debts,” you explained, “No one really uses this place, so the lights are motion activated to save us some credits, they’ll come on soon.”

You both paused at the sight of a little robot in front of you, the glowing red light from its body serving as the only other source of light down in the dark Zone. Much like the little helper bots around the Space Station, the white robot seemed innocent enough. Well, that was until it decided to turn suddenly to look at both you and the Trailblazer, the red lights on its face flashing angrily for a moment beyond the cracked glass of its scanning screen, causing the Trailblazer to take a nervous step back.

While the Trailblazer flinched beside you, you merely huffed in annoyance, waving at the robot calmly, “Don’t be like that stupid, it’s just me!” the red lights of the robot dimmed at your voice, while the lighting for the floor seemed to come on given your waving, bathing the main floor of the security zone in red lights lit up from the panels serving as arm rails around the platform. The robot quickly flew off to its proper position as you turned to face your companion, “Sorry ‘bout that, the robots down here are designed for security so they can be a little extra when someone new comes around.”

“Right…” the Trailblazer murmured, still clearly taken aback by all the events they had witnessed in the past five or so minutes. You almost felt bad about pushing them against the door now… well, almost. They did give some interesting reactions after all.

“Anyway, from here Ruan Mei’s card will allow you access to whatever you want,” you explained, pointing towards an elevator opposite to the one you emerged from, the elevator in the same direct the robot had scurried back to, “That elevator there will take you down to the research and curio storage area. I’ll stay here til you’re done whatever the hell Ruan Mei put you up to.”

“Thanks again Miss Y/N… sorry for bothering you on your day off!” the Trailblazer scurried away before you could reply, clearly anxious for a chance to get away from you, not that you could blame them exactly. You let them go, watching their anxious form get onto another much more welcoming elevator than the one you currently stood in front of.

It was only when they began their descent, metal doors closing behind them, that you spoke, “I didn’t expect to see you here, Doctor,” you commented, turning your gaze from the elevator back towards one of the two work stations on the ground level of the Seclusion Zone where Doctor Ratio stood, “Have nothing better to do than hang out in dark rooms all day? I wonder what the IPC would think if they heard their delegate had nothing better to do than waste their time.” You hummed playfully, moving towards the workstation he was at.

The doctor merely scoffed, the sound slightly muffled by that stupid alabaster head that he had on again today, “Those are the words you decide to greet me with today, really?” he sighed, as if disappointed, “I expected much more from you after our previous encounter.”

“Much more?” you echoed, shooting him a puzzled glance as you plopped yourself down at one of the chairs at the workstation, sighing at the relief of finally being able to put your items down for a longer period of time. You shook your hands out in front of you, as if trying to shake off the built up tension within them accrued from your long period of lugging things around, “What, were you expecting me to push you against a wall again until you lost all your inhibitions? Sorry to disappoint you, Doctor, but I think I’ve reach my kabedon quota for the month.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” the Doctor rebutted with hostility as he sat down in the chair a few feet away from your own, “I obviously expected an apology after our previous encounter. In fact, I’ve expected an apology for the last five days since our previous meeting. And yet you avoid me! Does this Space Station have no shame? No desire to maintain diplomatic relations between important parties?”

“What, you want me to apologize for doing my job? It’s my day off, I’m not apologizing for shit,” you said bluntly, moving your gaze away from him to flip open your laptop, one hand shielding the other as you typed in your password. You didn’t exactly know how he managed to see through the stupid alabaster head, but you weren’t about to put your laptop’s safety at risk.

“You and I both know, Miss Y/N, that embarrassing and threatening a guest and pushing them against the wall is nowhere within your employment description!” he exclaimed dramatically, crossing his arms across his chest like an angry child.

“It is when the guest is acting like a little shit,” you shrugged, watching your computer screen as the device turned on. You could hear the sound of him opening his insufferable mouth to speak again, forcing you to speak sooner, “Besides, I’m sure you’re happy to know that I received internal punishment from Arlan already. I don’t owe you anything.”

“It is satisfying to know that actions do have consequences in this Station,” he removed the alabaster head, revealing a sly smile below it. God you wished you had the freedom to punch his pretty face, especially right now, as you watched his amber eyes scan your appearance, “I must say, your apparel makes much more sense with the understanding that you are off the clock.”

You looked at your own outfit; a simple white cropped top and a high-waisted pair of black shorts that rode up as you sat down, the fabric only barely covering what it was supposed to, “What, you find offence in my outfit, Doctor? This ship is hot all the time, sue me!” You rolled your eyes, forcing yourself to look away from him to your computer, deft fingers quickly moving to reopen the programs you were using before the Trailblazer interrupted you.

“Not a fan of the heat? How interesting,” he retorted from beside you. From the corner of your eye, you could see him picking at his fingernails in mock boredom, “For someone has hot-headed as you, I would expect heat to be second nature.”

“Ha, ha,” you muttered, completely stone-faced, refusing to look at him for a few seconds before a smirk made its way onto your features. You turned in your swivel chair to face him head-on, “I didn’t know my temperature preferences would be so fascinating to you, Doctor. If you’re so interested in my experience with warmth, I could give you an indepth explanation of the last time I was hot and heavy, if you catch my drift.”

“You-” he coughed, cutting his own outburst short, “I can assure you I have no desire to understand you or your… bedroom habits at all.” You snickered at the half-assed retort. Aeones, it was so easy to get under this guy’s skin; you hadn’t had fun in a verbal battle like this in a while. It almost made you sad that this guy would leave the station sooner or later, well until you realized that his departure meant an end to dealing with his arrogant attitude.

“Great, in that case you can happily leave me alone then,” you flashed a mockingly cheerful smile at him before dropping your expression to a neutral stare, “It may be my day off, but I have shit to do… so, shoo.” You flicked your wrist mockingly at him, as if he Peppy begging for attention that you had no time to give. His eyes narrowed at the hand motion.

Of course, he didn’t shoo as you requested, only scootching his desk chair closer to you instead. To his credit, he let a few moments pass, watching you as you reopened all your closed tabs on your computer before he spoke again, as if in mock courtesy, “How did you know I was here?”

“Come on Mr. Ratio, I’m sure someone as smart as you allegedly are knows how eyeballs work,” you commented, focused on your computer instead of him as you scanned the information on the screen, “I know you wear an alabaster head, but the rest of us do have free range of our vision ya know?”

He ignored the quip, speaking once more, “Please do not play dumb with me, Ms. Y/N. You knew I was here the second the elevator arrived at this platform, if not before that. I saw you look this way upon your arrival” You turned your eyes from the screen to him again, stifling a sigh at the unfinished work that kept being put off. At this point, you started to doubt why you even lugged your laptop down here

“Only five people have access to this Zone,” you started, the Doctor blinking twice, as if startled that you were actually answering his question, “Screwllum, Herta, Ruan Mei use this area for their work, and, Arlan and me make occasional trips for security purpose. The geniuses are all in some meeting in some Aeon forsaken corner of the Simulated Universe, and Arlan is working upstairs, soooo.”

“I don’t quite see the chain of your logic,” the Doctor crossed his legs, resting his elbow on his uppermost knee to glance at you again as if you were entertainment. This time, it felt more as if you were an animal at the zoo that he was excited to observe.

“Whose playing dumb now, Mr. Ratio, you clearly know what I’m implying, “ you stared provocatively into his amber orbs, crossing one leg on top of the other. You watched his gaze flicker downwards at the moment, eyes scanning your nearly bare legs, before he forced his gaze upwards again, “The elevator came from this floor when the Trailblazer ‘n I were heading down here, meaning someone or something had to be here. That’s how I knew something was here,” you broke the eye contact, focusing again on the computer, an attempt you were sure was only in vain, “As for how I knew it was you, you didn’t exactly conceal yourself; you know that wearing that head doesn’t make you invisible to the rest of the world right?. If anything, I’m betting you sent the robot off to distract the Trailblazer, just so they wouldn’t notice you standing a few feet away.”

The Doctor chuckled, mockingly clapping his hands, “Bravo, bravo. I must say, you’re logic in impressive for someone of your calibre. If only you had the capacity to understand other areas of knowledge.” He sighed pittily, scooting his chair one more step towards yours.

“How did you get down here?” you ignored his quip, once again meeting his gaze, your features contorted into a frown. The Doctor clearly noticed the shift in your tone, shifting slightly in his chair. Part of you wanted to tease him for the effect your first encounter must’ve had on him, but the other more serious part wanted to find out who was behind the breach in security that you would have to correct during your next shift.

“Oh that? That was a simple task,” the Doctor shrugged offhandedly, regaining any composure he had lost a moment ago, “I simply struck up a conversation with one of your department members? What was her name…. Hmm I suppose I forgot it, or rather did not bother to remember it in the first place,” he shrugged, “Regardless, she seemed rather enthralled for the chance to observe me as she happened to come across me during my morning workout a few days prior,” he smirked at you, “it is funny how people misplace vital pieces of technology at the mere sight of human muscle.”

You raised an eyebrow, crossing your arms around your chest, the Doctor’s eyes following your movements again. Aeons, could this dude be any less subtle, “You’re telling me you managed enter your information into the permitted visitor’s list to the Seclusion Zone simply by using your rizz to distract the poor girl while she was on duty?”

“I am unsure of the meaning of…’rizz’ but you are correct,” he smirked as the frustration grew on your expression, “I must say, considering the recent Anti Matter Legion invasion, I would expect more from a security department which must be struggling to win back the trust and support of researchers. What a pity.” You resisted the urge to clench your jaw in frustration, forcing yourself to take a deep breath to release the growing tension in your body.

“And I would expect a delegate from the IPC would have better things to do then visually undress me after illegally obtaining entry to this area,” you retorted, scootching your chair close to his for a moment until your knees touched, ignoring the jolt you felt from the contact. His throat bobbed as he watched you place a hand on his clothed knee, “Does your both know your tendency for sexual harassment? Or am I the lucky one getting to see this side of you.”

“I-If there’s anyone engaging in harassment between the two of us, it is clearly you!’ he attempted to tilt his chin upwards in a show of domination, though the stutter in his tone was as clear as day, “I’ll let you know I have much better things to do than entertain this exacting conversation.” He turned his head away from you, crossing those muscular arms across his chest again. You scanned him for a moment; it definitely was no wonder that the guy worked out, he was built like a statue or something with the girth of those arms. You let your mind wander a few unsavoury places for a moment before you remembered who you were talking to.

“Good to know Doctor,” you said drily, using your feet to push your body away from his, the heat from his knees touching yours remaining on your bare leg. You turned your shoulder, facing your laptop again, this time with the determination to do work, “If that’s the case, you have no reason to stay here. It may be my day off, but I got work to do. So, like I said before, shoo. Leave me alone.” You mockingly waved your hand at him again, eyes still focused on the screen.

You were starting to wonder if the man in front of you had no concept of the words shoo, as he once again scooted his chair closer to you, this time his eyes focused on the computer. Based on his demeanour, he had already, his movements made with no hint of hesitation. You did your best to ignore him, even the wheels of his office chair nudged the wheels of your own, his chair now firmly placed directly behind you. You could feel his breath on your face and sense the heat from his toned body as he leaned in, as if wanted to get a closer work at what you were doing. The tension resting between you two was hot and electrifying, leaving goosebumps on your skin and, despite the disgust rising in your stomach, a slight heat on your cheeks. To your credit, you kept your features neutral, even as his toned arm accidentally brushed against your elbow resting firmly on the chair, the feeling of his firm muscles only adding to the heat surrounding the two of you. You forced your fingers to move expertly across the keyboard, glad the motions were well-trained and familiar to account for the brain fog that this whole situation was giving you.

The Doctor was the first to speak, breaking through the growing atmosphere between you two, “You know how to code?” he questioned, no hint of a quip in his tone as he watched your fingers move, line after line of a carefully typed code appearing on your screen.

“What, no insult with your words Doctor? Getting soft on me?” you teased, a closed-lip smile taking over your face, though your focus remained on the screen, “I know how to code,” was your simple confirmation. A moment of silence passed between you two, as if he was trying to process the information.

“Why?”

The one-word reply broke your concentration, your eyes finally leaving the screen to face the Doctor beside you, his hand on his chin once again, as if in thought, “Are you seriously asking me why I can code? Why not? We leave in a free universe after all,” you held back an eye roll.

You were surprised, even slightly creeped out, when he replied again without a quip attached to his words, “By the way you’re typing, you clearly have experience with this. Given your young age, and the fact you have worked your way up to a senior position in the Security Department on a renowned station, you must have learned outside of a place of formal education,” you blinked dumbly at his lines of reasoning. Maybe this dude really was a genius, “So yes, Miss Y/N, I am asking why.”

You let a few moments of silence pass before smirking at him, “So, you think I look young?”

“Is that really all you picked up from that speech? Perhaps I am giving you too much credit your intelligence,” he scoffed, watchful eyes noticing you stifle a chuckle in your hand. Ah, finally, you worked another quip out of him.

“If you are so curious to know more about me,” you started, the mix of playfulness and seriousness in your words calming his agitation, “I used to work for Lady Asta’s family before I worked here,” you shrugged, “A while back, her family wanted a new security system, and the ones offered by the IPC are either overpriced or stupidly designed,” she flashed him a sly smile, “No offence of course. So, I borrowed some books from the library about coding, and I taught myself. That’s all there is to it.”

“So you are self-taught,” he pondered to himself, “quite interesting. At least you manage to possess intelligence in some areas, even if you happen to be an idiot in most others.” You laughed out loud at that one, earning a strange, long look from the Doctor that you couldn’t quite read.

“Aww, Doc, is that a complement I hear? Guess I can’t blame you, I am a woman of many talents after all,” you smirked at him, leaning back in your chair to invade his personal space, your arm brushing his own as you did. Flesh lingered on flesh for a moment until he pulled the limb away.

“If that is your definition of a complement, you are a greater idiot than I suspected,” he snapped back, the speed of which he defended your remark being oddly quick. You watched him as he scooched his chair further away from you, the warmth of his skin on your own still lingering on your arm.

“Hmm, whatever you say,” you hummed playfully, noticing the way the Doctor swallowed heavily at your teasing, “I answered your little questions, can you leave now? The Station’s security system can’t exactly maintain itself ya’ know?” You knew you should turn back to your laptop, but witnessing the Doctor like this was just too good of a reward to give up.

“You designed the security system?” he asked, tone of genuine curiosity instead of judging disgust. Wow, he must really be growing soft on you.

“How else do you think I got promoted exactly?” you raised a teasing eyebrow, “I’m not exactly the model security guard,” you let your eyes gesture to your water bottle, a knowing look passing both of your faces as you took a swig of the alcohol inside, “I had to earn my promotion elsewhere. So yeah, I did design the system; well, really I just replaced the old one from before Asta, Arlan and I got here,” you shrugged, “Same difference. I’m sure you’re glad to know the very system causing you headaches upon arrival and preventing the docking of your ship was my own! Does it feel nice to know that you physically couldn’t drive your ship forward because of my external protection shield?”

“It explains why the system is as infuriating as you,” he explained drily, tone unamused at your quips. You opened your mouth, a playful comment on the tip of your tongue, before both you and the Doctor were distracted by the sound of the farther elevator returning to the main floor of the Seclusion Zone. You and the Doctor watched in silence as the metallic door opened, the Trailblazer strutting over to you with confusion in their eyes. A quick glance told you that the doctor had repositioned his alabaster head, leaving only his figure exposed.

“Whose this?” they asked you, gaze flickering between you two. You were happy that, either given their confusion or just their pure ignorance, they failed to recognize the heat that had built between the two of you, as if their one-track mind could only focus on one stimulus at a time. You weren’t exactly prepared to explain the source of the tension.

“He’s not important,” you commented drily. Despite the alabaster head on the Scholar’s body, you almost felt that you could see him glaring at you, “Did you find what you were looking for?”

“I gotta take that other elevator; go to the bottom floor,” they explained, eyes flickering to the second metallic elevator, closer to the main elevator you had descended from earlier. You recognized the hesitation in their tone, causing you to raise an eyebrow.

“That’s fine… but you good?” you questioned, “Is something down there?” you paused for a moment, as if waiting for an answer, before sighing, “Oh right, I forgot that you’re doing that whole not talking thing. Whatever, it’s fine, I can come with, if that would make you feel better.” You flashed them a smile that you hoped was reassuring despite the less-than-civil encounter you had with the Trailblazer earlier. Luckily for you, it seemed to be reassuring enough, as they matched your expression back.

“Honestly, that’d be great, thanks Miss Y/N,” you could almost visibly see the tension leave their body, shoulders relaxing and breathing settled. Their own relief caused the smile to remain on your face before the grating sound of the Doctor’s voice invaded your thoughts.

“So? Get on with it then,” the man beside you finally regained his composure, huffing at the two of you, “Are you waiting for a sign? Time is ticking, descend via the elevator, what you seek is there.” You cocked an eyebrow at the knowing tone, forcing you to look at the Doctor, standing to place one hand on your hip.

“And how would you know, Doctor, what my friend here is looking for?” you strutted into his personal space, finger poking his closed chest accusingly. His covered head tilted down as if following the motion, before tilting up again. The action was probably a mistake, you recognized, doing nothing to quell whatever the hell you two had built up a few moments prior, but if you were good at anything, it was threatening people.

“It appears, Miss Y/N, that you became so caught up in our banter that you failed to ask a vital question; why am I here in the first place?” your finger lowered in shock as you listened to the words, the scholar taking the chance to stand and turn his back to you, leaving you face-to-face with his muscles as he talked to the Trailblazer, “I know exactly who you are, and I am aware you are in Ruan Mei’s employ. This was not my intended destination,” he turned his body to face you, giving you know choice but to tilt your head upward to meet his gaze, or else be sentenced to look at his toned chest, “If your Miss Y/N had the intelligence to question why I was here, instead of merely question how, she would have been able to tell you that I just happened to find my way here during my visit, and saw what she was up to. My goals are roughly aligned with yours. Since you’re here, I won’t intercede. That’s all you need to know.”

The Trailblazer merely blinked, as if struggling to process the words, “Sooo, what’s with the alabaster head?” Though you couldn’t see the Doctor’s expression, you could almost picture the way his jaw must have dropped at the casual comment, a thought that would’ve made you laugh, if not for the rising suspicion you had of the man.

“My question exactly,” you huffed, rolling your eyes. At least you and the Trailblazer could agree on one thing. Unlike when you made comments about it the other day, though, the Doctor kept the head firmly in place.

“Because I can’t bear to see idiots. Of course, they wouldn’t want to see me either,” the Trailblazer once again stared blankly, earning a sigh from the Doctor, “Regardless, the real Ruan Mei’s creation is hidden in the giant incubator below us.”

“Incubator?” you questioned, though besides a sparing glance, no one offered you a reply, “Ruan Mei’s creation? Aeons, I’ve about had it here with that woman and her stupid ecological research.” you rolled your eyes.

“You two best hurry. Go. Take the elevator and bear witness to this ‘Genius Masterpiece,” as if feeling confident in his reply, the scholar turned on his heel to leave, strutting towards the central elevator.

“We are definitely having a chat about this later!” you called after him, not bothering to hide the anger in your tone. The man of the hour merely glanced over his shoulder, alabaster head still in place as he pushed the button to the elevator. You hated how his muscles flexed at the motion, leaving your lips empty of threats for a moment as the elevator descended quickly to your level, and opened up to allow him access to the upstairs.

“I will look forward to that conversation then,” was his simple reply as he stepped inside, “I wonder what pathetic insults you will manage to muster this time” The metal doors closed behind him, leaving the room temporarily basked in silence. You were grateful for the chance to force your anger back down.

“Let’s go,” you nodded to your companion, following their lead as they rushed towards the other elevator, hurriedly pressing the button, as if their quick finger movements would make the machine arrive faster, “Care to explain what this incubator is, exactly?” you raised an eyebrow as you both waited.

“Can’t,” was their only response before they rushed into the now open device, forcing you to hurry after them.

“Rude, what did Ruan Mei do to you exactly” You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms as the machine started to descend. You spoke again, knowing that they, for whatever reason, couldn’t provide you with an answer, “Whatever, I’ll know soon enough anyway. Aeons, this day is exhausting,” you attempted to force the tiredness out of your eyes, your relatively calm demeanour contrasting the stress building up on the Trailblazer’s features. Their growing stress, though, was starting to give you some second thoughts too. They may not be the brightest book on the shelf, but they had fought a plethora of beasts in their short lifespan. The fact that whatever was down here was stressing them out was almost ominous.

Soon enough, the elevator arrived in the bottom room, forcing you and the Trailblazer to step out, your eyes immediately widening, “The hell? What did Ruan Mei do to our old welcome hall?” you groaned, taking in the giant broken device hanging above, dripping some type of fluid on to the floor, “Does she even know how long it takes to clean these floors? Aeons, she’s insufferable.” The normal lightening down in the hall wasn’t flickering on, leaving the round, circular space bathed in an eerie red light. Ruan Mei had replaced the old chandelier with some sort of investigation which clearly wasn’t safe or ethical, the thing suspended above the ground haphazardly.

“I think that’s the least of our problems right now, Miss Y/N,” the Trailblazer muttered, gesturing for you to look further up. You did as they told you, following their lead, both of your eyes widening what you saw. Flying right at you was a giant blue bug, probably 20 feet tall with sharp stingers and an even sharper, angry expression. The Trailblazer was quick to react, summoning their bat and swinging it at the creature in a vain attempt to drive it off. You quickly summoned your own weapon, a black pistol, pointing it in the creature’s direction.

“What the fuck is that thing?” you exclaimed, dodging out of the way when the bug flew at you two again, stifling a groan as your body hit the ground hard, your knees taking the brunt of the impact. You were quick to get your feet back under you, forcing any vertigo out of you and aiming the gun once again as the creature flew around you. You waited til it stilled momentarily to fire a shot, not wanting to risk something more reckless in a closed space with the Trailblazer around. Not that the shot made much of a difference anyway; the creature only shrieked, flying once again as if not in danger at all.

“It’s an emantor of propagation clone! How could this be…?” the Trailblazer muttered from beside you, swinging the bat hard at the big again when it charged you, not caring as he got hit in the side by one of the claws, “Miss Y/N, we gotta defeat this thing fast, otherwise the swarm will-”

Before he could finish his sentence, you watched in horror as the bug paused, making a noise somewhere between the sloshing of water and squishing of something slimy as the one bug turned into two… and then four. The replication process caused a gust of energy to swirl around the enclosed space, the force of the gust pulling you and the Trailblazer closer and closer to the center of it.

Struggling to keep their footing, the Trailblazer fell to the ground, unaware of the several bugs flying in their direction. You were quick to grab them by the waist, dragging them to the side forcefully to dodge the onslaught of attacks, throwing caution to the wind to fire your weapon at the smaller bugs. However, with the force of the dodge, and the continued harsh breeze, you too fell to your knees, leaving you to hold up your pistol protectively as the bug continued to swarm around you.

“Miss Y/N!” the Trailblazer exclaimed, pointing up in horror. Your eyes widened as the larger bug created something seemingly akin to a black hole above you, the large ball of energy blowing a dark blue colour as it grew bigger and bigger. You pushed the Trailblazer’s body behind you in vain, wondering how the hell you were supposed to get out of this situation as the ball grew bigger and bigger. You had half the mind to tell the Trailblazer to run off, to get out of there before the both of you were killed.

At the moment you truly felt helpless. It’s funny how we can take life for granted, living day after day without a care in the world, until some crazy genius lady creates a bug that threatened the safety of hundreds with her stupid creation. Your body still on top of the Trailblazers, you held them protectively, hoping that at least they would survive, even if that meant your untimely demise. Someone had to protect the researchers, and if that couldn’t be you, at least you knew that the Trailblazer would have it covered. You stared at the growing blackhole, accepting whatever fate you would be dealt.

That was, until everything exploded, the blackhole shattering into pieces as if the creature was made of shards of glass. Above you, the five bugs shook violently for a moment, their bodies growing larger and larger before they exploded into pieces. A trail of blood and guts rained down on the two of you like some messed-up version of a snowstorm, coating your body in a slimy substance that you sure as hell hoped would wash out in the bath.

You let yourself lay there for a second, your body still on top of the Trailblazers, just trying to catch your breath. Your heart was thumping like crazy, as if your body, like the bug, also was on the brink of explosion due to the build-up of adrenaline. You forced yourself to breathe, though the breaths were still shaky as you moved your head to view the surrounding area.

“Hey… it’s okay now, were safe,” you moved your body off of your companion below you, tone gentle and reassuring. They slowly opened their eyes, as if shocked to be alive. Given what you both had just seen, you were in no position to judge them for their reaction. A few more seconds of that thing and you both would’ve been toast.

“It’s over..?” they questioned, voice as shaky as their wobbly legs as they stood. You were quick to stand to, steading them by placing a gentle hand on their back “Are you okay Miss Y/N?”

“As good as one can be after almost dying, I guess,” you moved your hand away after they regained their balance, observing the piles of bug guts surrounding the two of you. You realized then that you would probably be tasked with cleaning all this up, causing your face to recoil in disgust.

“...I…I need to get some answers out of Ruan Mei,” the Trailblazer muttered, body still shaky as they turned from your form, “Thanks for the help Miss Y/N… I really owe you one.” They didn’t wait for a reply, simply dragging their tired body to the elevator, leaving you alone in the room, your hear still hammering out of your chest.

As you stared at the mountains of insect guts coating the bottom of the incubator room, only one thing came to mind.

“I really need a raise…”

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