#FINALLY got a doctors appointment
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#FINALLY got a doctors appointment#Not an in person one lmao but if this new treatment doesn't work over the next few weeks then they'll see me#Cautiously optimistic about even the concept of a treatment!! Knowing they're ready to investigate further if it fails is also reassuring#Absolutely exhausted but kinda relieved#Almost convenient that I had another random pain/vomiting episode this morning to prompt the speedy emergency appointment#Almost.#I'm still not thrilled about it. -3 cups of tea alone is not how I wanna go about my days
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But I am really excited for tomorrow evening. You guys know I'm excited to see Tommy and some proper Buck and Tommy content. And Halloween stuff!!! 911 Halloween episodes are always a good time.
I'm definitely on the Buck-touches-the-mummy-and-gets-a-skin-infection(Or worse)-and-Tommy-is-weirded-out-and-calls-Eddie-in team. Because why would you NOT call in your friendly neighborhood former army medic and unofficial paramedic in that case. Like what's the point of having one if you don't use it.
But I also love love love seeing Buck and Tommy in comfy/cozy clothes together. Tank tops/large hoodies/sweats. It feels so domestic to know they're comfy with each other like that, but of course they are after almost six months. But it's good to see.
I just cannot wait for tomorrow.
#bucktommy#I missed all the fun yesterday between my doctors appointment and grocery shopping#and then when I finally got on the computer I threw on sykkuno's stream and played some tcg card shop sim
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Back on my nonsense…a little preview of what I’m doing in the background.
#trigun#trigun stampede#vash the stampede#and maybe another person#my broke butt finally got an iPad#so I no longer have to do art on my phone#I have ideas in my head the hard part is deciding how to render them#the other part is wanting to throw yourself off a cliff halfway through making it#I’ve had a lot going on so that’s why it’s been a bit delayed too#dentist appointments#funerals#doctor appointments#work stuff#all fun things#but yeah I’m looking to finishing this one soon
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The Healthcare horrors persist
Hhhhhhhhhhhhhh
#Updates on this whole mess:#Im insured under my dad#he has Healthcare option 1 which is government provided since he is retired millitary and option 2 due to his new job#after his retirement option 1 went funky for me and changed things around meaning i was no longer able to be seen by my pcp#Im also unable to log in to any of my accounts for 1 so im not sure whats going on there and what plan of 1 i have specifically#so i switched to a new pcp which accepted option 2 (which was super hard to find) literally last week#made an appointment with her for next month so i can finally get answers about my funky blood test results#(which is still don't know what specifically is wrong with it! for all i know i could just have high cholesterol-#or i could have markers for rheumatoid arthritis instead of my prior fibromyalgia diagnosis!)#(i also do not get refils for my anxiety medication until i have an appointment with my new doctor)#crisis averted right? WRONG!#I just got a call from my Dad saying he is switching jobs so I am no longer insured under 2#meaning...#1) i need to call option 1 and figure out how to get into my accounts and what my insurance is#2) check that this pcp acceprs said insurance#3) find yet another pcp if she doesnt and make an appointment for god knows when#and here is the kicker:#since option 1 is government and millitary based it is going to take FOREVER to get anything done#And Im not sure if they are going to want me to renew my millitary dependent ID or not#because that shit is EXPIRED and i was under the impression i can no longer renew it due to his retirement#but also in order to make any acoount with option 1 they require a benefits number which expires alongside the ID#Then on the other side of things i also have my wisdom teeth surgery to schedule (through my mom thank god)#and school starting again in a few weeks#going to defenestrate myself istg
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good evening beautiful phone app ppl i am back
#hooooo boy today was a doozy#i finally was able to see a doctor and got prescribed a few meds for whatever demon is in my body#going to 3 different urgent cares was crazy but it was what it was ig#had a pretty big fight with my mom and actually did kinda fr have a mental break#i swear i was joking ab that earlier but gd did it rlly happen 😭#anyway so yeah i ended up having to make a phone call to a mental health center that provides inpatient/outpatient services#got an appointment/assessment tomorrow morning yippee#i'm trying my best to get myself sorted out like i can't keep living like this
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........creachure
#cats#his eyes are always so big and weird he no longer looks like a cat anymore sometimes.. in a way...#it's hard to understand.. complicated vibes on this boy#his summer sprawl (laying flopped out on the floor weird because of the heat)#I AM still trying to get some costumes done and also post another poll advtnure so I can finally finish it lol#the weather this month has just been soooo.... There was the heat wave and then after like 2 days of coolenss where I was like 'ah! finally#I can be productiv!' but just as soon as I had recovered from the heat.. it got hot again ghhhh#currently sweating inside. I actually had to leave my doctors appointment early today because I was just so so warm from#sitting in the car and the fac tthat half the buildings still do not have their air up very high and etc. and I felt so nausous#and flushed and started to get back and stomach pains for some reason.. Which I guess is good in a way to further confirm to doctors that#I Have Something Wrong With Me lol (most normal people should not be this heat sensitive I think) but is also still a little stinky#because I still payed a copay for the fulla appointment time but cit it short by leaving 15minues early.. grrr#ANYWAY. It seems like recently it's just hot all the time but it will ocasionally tempt you with a cool day of reprieve BUT don't let your#guard down! because as soon as you start to think 'hey things are getting better! :0' the sun will be like NO actualy. scalding temperature#be upon ye..#Which of COURSE. I would rather have hot weather with little breaks in between than just constant hot weather. 100% definitely.#but it just always makes me sad because I get my hopes up lol.. JUST as I've recovered from the past heat and am So Ready To Start#On All My Things now That I'm Not As Sick And Hey Maybe It's Even Cool Enough To Do A Costume! .. my hopes are dashed#.. woe and so on and so forth. . Which I am stil managing to get a few things done but just.. not the things I really WANT to do (costumes.#sculptures. edit videos. etc. ).#anyway.. look at son.. If nothing else I still have lots of cat photos.. my sole productivity offerings to the internet online world
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My old HRT prescription finally ran out last week, and I'm still wait-listed by all the clinics in the area, so I was scrambling to find somewhere to get a stop-gap prescription. Planned Parenthoods are usually quick (I was picking up my first prescription within 90 minutes of walking in the door) but none of the ones near me offer in-office trans healthcare, and all the online appointments are booked out the next few weeks. Getting anything shipped from online prescription/pharmacy sites takes too long. I ended up deciding to just find the closest Planned Parenthood with open slots for in-person appointments. It wound up being the El Paso clinic.
The irony of having to go to Texas for transgender healthcare was not lost on me.
#Until now I've been relying on my old prescription from Florida#After they passed the law banning hrt last year the planned parenthood I went to out there told me they couldn't give#me any new prescriptions but they could give me extensions for my old prescription for up to a year#That year finally ended and I still haven't heard back from any of the doctor's offices I contacted out here#Driving four hours for a doctor's appointment seems ridiculous but I got a book on tape from the library and made a road trip out of it#The first nurse that did the questionnaire and blood sample was really nice and took an interest my whole situation and wanted ''the tea''#The prescribing nurse was less nice and openly criticized and condescended about my medical decisions and wouldn't prescribe to a pharmacy#within 200 miles of me but the results of my blood work wound up vindicating my choices and I transferred my prescription to a closer CVS#This was initially just supposed to be a temporary way for me to get my meds while waiting for a nearby doctor to get back to me#but if I don't hear back from anybody local then I'd probably be fine making the trip every few months#until either Texas bans it or I move on to my next destination after ABQ
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hello friends i am still Alive
#so uh#my memory is still gradually going down the shitter#almost lost my job to it last week#but i've finally got my psychiatrist's appointment tomorrow#and a ct scan scheduled for 2 months from now#so things might. develop?#in any case that's my Doctor's Note Excuse as to why i haven't posted/replenished my queue in so long#aka the stupid explanation#i've literally been forgetting to do it All The Time#but HEY i'm super sick rn (not covid at least)#so my mind is free enough to let me remember to finally feed my poor queue#HUZZAH
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2024 year of charlie gets a fucking break (hopefully. maybe. tbd.)
#ctxt#i'm on medication that's reduced my post-hysterectomy pain by about 70%#i have an intake appointment with a physical therapist in march & a referral to start trigger point injections#to hopefully finally recover as completely as possible from the nightmarish neuropathy that's plagued me since uuuhhhh#going on 2 years ago. holy shit. genuinely can't believe i've been surviving & functioning as well as i have for this long#while suffering a disabling & extremely painful surgical complication. fuck my original surgeon for brushing me off during that time#but the new provider i'm working with is so responsive & thorough in her approach & seems genuinely committed#to helping me finally get relief after all this time. she listens to my feedback & is flexible in her approach#and her assistant is a great communicator who's been handling most of the logistics of care coordination for me#and what a huge fucking relief that is. to not have to drag my doctors kicking & screaming towards maybe treating me eventually#i wanna cry. i finally feel like i'm being taken seriously and cared for. and i'm not BETTER yet (might never be the same as i was pre-op)#but i actually feel optimistic for the first time in over a year that i won't just have to deal with this agonizing pain on my own forever#i might actually see enough improvement that i can start to get back to living my life instead of just surviving it#money is tighter than it's been since i got laid off during early pandemic and that's stressing me out#but i promised myself that i would put my health first in 2024 and that means only working the bare minimum needed to pay my bills for now#genuinely i so fucking needed a break. i felt like i was trying to swim through a meat grinder last year#and it wasn't until i ended up in the ER about it that i finally was able to take my own pain seriously enough#to put my foot down & make some necessary changes that are now letting me focus on Getting Well With Myself at last#in hindsight it's like. really freaking me out how thoroughly i was able to compartmentalize & dissociate from how miserable i was#bc nobody who had the ability to help me would take me seriously & my shitty boss was like. extremely textbook emotionally abusive#and on one hand that was a survival mechanism that kept me on my feet during one of the worst times of my life. so props to myself there#but it was also very maladaptive how long & unnecessarily it went on before i snapped out of it & escalated things for my own safety#it was the same helpless frustration i often felt as a kid of like 'well nobody is on my side but me so i gotta suck it up & help myself'#and i think the family trauma shit that was going on last year definitely contributed to that. idk sense of doubling across time?#and things had to get Extremely Bad before they were bad enough for me to realize that although i felt like it#i am no longer an isolated & parentified island of a child who is beholden to the whims of ignorant & indifferent adults#i actually can and should take action to advocate for myself bc i am an adult and i CAN now change my circumstances as needed#instead of just enduring them as if i'm stuck there with no agency or chance to change things#and i have a really solid support system who helped me feel like it was possible to stand up for myself to get the help i desperately need#chronic blogging
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bad news. ya boy’s got wicked low testosterone. I’m outta boy juice!
#just got my results back this morning. I’m outta the boy sauce.#haven’t talked to my dr yet BUT I did see my therapist who is NOT a doctor but he says yeah I’ve got it worse than any of his past patients#gonna call my dr tomorrow and see about setting up an appointment#dang… my juice#you ever have that fantasy that you see a dr and they finally find a source of a long standing health issue AND they can fix it w/ a pill?#I’m trying not to get my hopes up but my number was rilll rilll low#like… I could be more normal in a week or two#or at least have more energy and drive#that would be amazing#just let me dream a little#lol but uhhh what if I instead ask for estrogen and uhhhh uhhhh 🥴#what if I was pretty? and happy….#hey let’s not unpack that right now#just gonna keep that buried down deep#that’s for 40 year old Ian to work through!#let’s not make a big deal out of any of this#and I love you. and I appreciate you.#you can ignore this#text
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it seems that i'm having a rare moment of relative lucidity, which is to say freedom from intense worry or exhaustion or unbearable affect. which isn't to say i feel like striking some piece of iron while i'm strong enough to hold the hammer. just felt like making a note of the fact, in case i forget this kind of state is even possible. very nice to not be cursing the day i was born
#finally got a grip on myself and Scheduled An Appointment With A Psychiatrist 👍👍👍which i've been putting off for ages#could a mentally ill person do this.#sounds stupid that i'm going to see a doctor when i'm actually feeling ok#but it's because i'm wondering whether it really makes sense to continue with my current medication. look at me being Responsible#and not just stopping it on my own. like i seriously considered to
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and FUCK kindly miquella❗
#finally ............#im not even that happy. like i just feel like i got a doctors appointment over with or something#man whatever
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may you have a very good rest :]
i am so sorry my brain is not connecting to words
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Hjhshjs ahhh thank you my explosive anon, imma go pass out now-- *dies*
#ask#explosive anon#I GOT HOME FROM MY TRIP WITH A FINAL BURST OF ENERGY AND EDITED A VIDEO FOR 4 HOURS#imma sleep now#got an eye doctors appointment tomorrow xd#goodnight tumblr#<3
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Tippy: Selfish. He is so freaking selfish. He thinks everything is about him. Every time I take a step he bitches about it. I can't do anything because he's so selfish
Vanilla: Who?
Tippy: My uterus
#tipvans#tw menstruation#tw periods#BUT GUESS WHAT!!! I've got a doctor's appointment coming up and hopefully i can put an end to this madness finally 💪#you know how boys get when they're on their periods... eating chocolate- using heating pads- summoning demons
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Today's the day
#not writing#but soon to be writing#i make no promises of when these will be done but soon hopefully#finally got into the doctor after like almost two months#the appointment lasted five minutes#so that's fun#my dog also committed a war crime
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I'M HOME AND I HAVE MY NEW WEIGHED BLANKET AND I'M GOING TO SLEEP WITH IT TONIGHT AND I'M AO EXCITED TO FIND OUT HOW IT FEELS
#i wanted a weighted blanket for literally years and i finally had enough noney for it#it got here a few days ago but i wasnt home#and now i am#and i have this blanket#happy happy happy#alt text#yay me!#hopefully that'll help my insomnia#i have a doctor's appointment next week about ny insomnia and I'm so glad thia came before the appointment#cause now I'll be able to say if that helps me or not#this post got me to 100 posts yo
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