#Evian babies

[rafeandonlyrafe]

crazy, baby

words: 1.9k

warnings: 18+ only!, smut, reader is mean and jealous, female receiving oral, p in v sex, unprotected sex (but reader is on birth control), mentions of breeding, one use of daddy, curse words

taglist: @drewstarkeysbae @thelomlisrafecameron @f4ll-for-you @dilvcv @slut4drudy @drewsbabygirll @jjmaybankswifes-blog @rafescokenostril @jjsmarijuana @jjmaybankisbae @seeingstarks @angelofcigs @cece45450

if anyone else spoke to rafe the way you speak to him, they'd probably never be seen again.

but you're not anyone else, you're rafes sweet girlfriend, at least he sees you as sweet, everyone else sees you as equally intimidating as rafe, if not more so because of the power you hold over him.

“rafe, bring me a water.” you call, not looking up from your phone. rafe stands up quickly, heading into the kitchen and bringing you back a water, but not just any water, a freshly cracked open evian bottle.

“here you go baby.” rafe hands you the water, and you don't even acknowledge him as you sip from it.

“do you want to go to a party soon?” rafe asks, and you sigh dramatically at being interrupted, even though all you're doing is scrolling.

“is kelces annoying new girlfriend going to be there? i hate that bitch.” you scowl.

“i told topper that if she's there, we're not there so she was not invited.” rafe says, running his hand through the hair that falls on the side of your face.

“okay, yeah, let's go then.” you shrug, getting up and walking away from rafe to get dressed. you sift through your dresses, trying to decide what to wear before you settle on a tight black dress.

you put it on along with your heels before finding rafe.

“you look so sexy, baby.” rafe groans, gripping your ass when you wrap your arms around his shoulders, pressing your lips together in a kiss. 

“i know, i look hot.” you smirk, rafe nodding in agreement.

“now let me go show my hot girlfriend off to everyone.” rafe says, making you roll your eyes, but a smile still slips through your cold exterior.

you listen to your favorite music in the car while rafe drives you. you complain to him about going so slow, causing him to rev the engine and increase his speed well over the limit as you howl with laughter.

“what do you want to drink, baby?” rafe asks as you enter the party, knowing he's tasked with keeping a cold drink in your hand throughout the whole night, not caring when he has to suddenly leave a conversation to get you a refill.

“mmm, just a white claw please.” you lean closer to rafe, as if you're going to whisper in his ear, but you don't lower your volume down, letting everyone hear your next words, “don't want to get that drunk so i can remember how hard you fuck me tonight.”

rafe cups your cheek, moving your lips to his as he takes them in a hard kiss. “you drive me fucking crazy baby girl.”

you grin, watching as rafe heads away to get your drink. you head further into the party, leaving rafe to find you as you greet a couple of your friends, stopping to talk to topper about the party.

“here you go baby.” rafe finds you amongst the crowd, handing you the white claw, already opened, knowing you don't like to use your nails on the pop tabs.

“rafe, don't you think this music is pretty shit?” you question to rafe, but topper understands it's directed to him and stands up to change the song, knowing how you get when you're annoyed and not wanting to face your wrath.

you nod in approval when the music is changed from rap to more hip hop, knowing it's better for dancing and gloating to rafe how immediately the switch has more people heading to the makeshift dance floor on toppers patio.

“you were right, baby, you're always right.” rafe hums in agreement, watching you finish off your white claw.

“im gonna go dance with my girls.” you tell rafe, giving him a kiss before heading off. rafe knows he doesn't have to give you permission or even worry about you, you truly don't have eyes for anyone else, all other guys piss you off except for rafe.

rafe smiles as he watches you leave, completely infatuated with you, only half listening to whatever topper is talking about.

you find the few girls that don't annoy you and hug them quickly before joining in their dancing, shoving one of their boyfriends away when he tries to dance up on his girlfriend. you have told her to break up with him so many times and wish she would finally just listen.

“do you know the girl rafe is talking to?” one of your friends ask, but you don't even look to see who uttered the words as your head snaps to look at rafe, still in the same spot you left him, but there's a new girl in your place, some bottle blonde that has your blood boiling. she's talking her head off while rafe stands there disinterested, holding another white claw for you when you're done dancing.

“what the fuck?” you growl, stomping through the crowd to rafe. you smack the drink out of his hand, letting it spill all over the floor.

“baby, what's wrong?” rafe questions, but you've already turned your attention to the girl.

“back off my boyfriend you whore.” you shout at her, rafe wrapping his arms around your waist to keep you from physically fighting her. “he would never go for an ugly slut like you anyways!” 

the girls eyes widen, rushing away from you and rafe as you turn to him in anger. “i walk away for a couple minutes and you start flirting with some other girl?” you shout.

“baby, she was just talking to me and i wasn't even listening. calm down.”

“rafe cameron don't you dare tell me to calm down!” you yell, but rafe simply ignores your outburst, leaning down to pick you up, throwing you over his shoulder. you shout and beat your fists against his back, but rafe keeps walking, heading upstairs as you groan.

“im mad at you, rafe.” you frown when he sets you down in one of the guest bedrooms.

“and im gonna make it up to you, baby. gonna fuck you, yeah?” rafe says, tugging the top of your dress down, revealing your tits to him.

“since you wanna be a brat, im gonna fuck all the attitude out of you.” rafe shrugs, hands gripping your chest, playing with your nipples.

“you think you can just fuck me to make up for almost cheating?” you complain, but reach to grip rafes cock.

“i didn't almost cheat, you know that. i would never. you're my girl, my perfect girl. i only want you.” rafe leans forward, kissing you before you can argue back. “i love you sweetheart.”

you moan against rafes lips, feeling him harden under your fingertips. “i love you too.” you pull at rafes shirt, and he disconnects your lips to take it off. “im sorry for being jealous.”

“it's okay. clearly i haven't been taking care of you enough for you to get all pent up.” rafe says, tugging at the waist of your dress, pulling it up to reveal your small panties.

“turn around.” rafe commands, and for once you listen to him, bending over the bed and placing your hands on the comforter to stabilize yourself.

“why would i ever want another girl after having your pretty pussy?” rafe sinks to his knees behind you, rubbing his hands over your bum, giving it a light smack before tugging your underwear down your legs.

“eat me.” you say, and rafe moves quickly to shove his head between your legs, tongue and mouth working quickly over your pussy.

“fuck, right there.” you groan when rafe flicks over your clit. you angle your hips to give him even better access, his hands gripping your shaking thighs to keep you stable.

“m-more.” you whine, grinding your cunt down onto his face. rafe drags his tongue back through your folds until he reaches your hole, his tongue pushing in as he thrusts it in and out.

you moan loudly, not caring if anyone passing by can hear you. it's not the first time you've hooked up at a party, or even a party at toppers house. everyone knows how crazy you two are for each other.

“give me your cock, rafe cameron.” you tell him, and rafe presses a kiss to your clit before standing up. you lean forwards, shaking your bum by swaying your hips side to side, enticing rafe as you hear him undoing his pants and dropping them to the ground.

you let out a whine when you feel his cock press against your entrance. he teases you there for a moment, making you wait, and just when you are about to shout for him to hurry it up, rafes hips push forward and he sinks his cock into you in one smooth motion.

“fuck!” rafe shouts, feeling your cunt squeezing him. he immediately starts to move, his cock hammering in and out of you as rafes large hands grip your hips. he pulls you back into him, but you don't even need the encouragement, rocking your body back and forth, moving in time with him.

the harsh slapping sound of your skin hitting each other each time echos around the room.

“fuck me faster, rafe.” you tell your boyfriend, who starts to buck his hips into yours, not fully pulling out before he pushes back in, wanting to stay buried deep inside of you as much as possible.

“like that.” you moan appreciateivly.

“my pretty girlfriend, moaning like a slut for me.” rafe smiles down at you, “so jealous just from seeing a girl stand near me, you're all mine. you love me so much.”

“i do love you rafe.” you say, his hands gripping your hips tighter at the declaration.

“and i love you more. fucking crazy about you, crazy about this pussy.”

“yeah?” you smirk. “gonna fill this pussy up?”

“of course baby, gonna put a baby in you, gonna make sure you can't leave me even when you threaten to.” rafe says, knowing two things: that you are on birth control and not actually able to get pregnant, and despite you often getting mad and saying you're going to leave him, that you are never going to.

“yes, daddy, fuck a baby into me.” you moan, reaching a hand down to rub at your clit, already pulsing from rafes talented mouth.

“i hope everyone hears you moaning for me. im yours, baby, im yours.” rafe moans, throwing his head back as he can't hold back any longer, his cum spurting into you, causing your orgasm to overtake your body as well.

you collapse forward into the bed, unable to keep yourself up as rafe moves with you, keeping himself buried in your pussy.

“are you calm now?” rafe asks, making sure to carefully pull out of you, watching as his cum drips onto the comforter.

“i am.” you hum, eyes fluttering closed with your cheek pressed against the mattress.

“want to go home and fuck some more or want to go back to the party?” rafe asks, getting himself redressed, handing you your underwear when you finally sit up.

“mmm, party for like half an hour so everyone can see how fucked out we both look than home for more.” you say, putting your panties back on and readjusting your dress, leaving the bed a mess for topper or more likely his family maid to take care of.

“you're crazy, baby.” rafe laughs, wrapping his arm around your shoulders.

“and don't you forget it.”

[what-shitfuckery-is-this-ew]

BOYCOTTING FOR PALESTINE

The Official BDS Boycott Targets

Campaigns

Block the boat: End maritime arms transfer to Israel

Ban Apartheid Israel from Sports (FIFA, Olympics)

CAF get off Israel's train: Boycott CAF

Greenwashing Apartheid

Israeli Spyware

Military Embargo

Farming Injustice

Consumer Boycotts - a complete boycott of these brands

Cisco

Axa

Puma

Carrefour

HP

Siemens

Chevron

Intel

Caltex

Israeli produce

Re/max

Ahava

Texaco

Sodastream

Intel

Organic Boycott Targets - boycotts not initiated by BDS but still complete boycott of these brands

Disney

Macdonald's

Dominos

Papa Johns

Burger King

Pizza Hut

Wix

Divestments and exclusion - pressure governments, institutions, investment funds, city councils, etc. to exclude from procurement contracts and investments and to divest from these

Elbit Systems

CAF

Volvo

CAT

Barclays

JCB

HD Hyundai

TKH Security

HikVision

Pressure - boycotts when reasonable alternatives exist, as well as lobbying, peaceful disruptions, and social media pressure.

Google

Amazon

AirBnb

Booking.Com

Expedia

Teva

Here are some companies that strongly support Israel (but are not Boycott targets). There is no ethical consumption under capitalism and boycotting is a political strategy - not a moral one. If you did try to boycott every supporter of Israel you would struggle to survive because every major company supports Israel (as a result of attempting to keep the US economy afloat), that being said, the ones that are being boycotted by masses and not already on the organic boycott list are coloured red.

5 Star Chocolate

7Days

7Up

Apple

Arsenal FC

ALDO

Arket

Axe

Accenture

Ariel

Adidas

ActionIQ

Aquafina

Amika

AccuWeather

Activia

Adobe

Aesop

Azrieli Group

American Eagle

Amway Corp

Axel Springer

American Airlines

American Express

Atlassian

AdeS

Aquarius

Ayataka

Audi

Barqs

Bain & Company

Bayer

Bank Leumi

Bank Hapoalim

BCG (Boston Consulting Group)

Biotherm

Bershka

Bloomberg

BMW

Boeing

Booz Allen Hamilton

Burberry

Bath & Body Works

Bosch

Bristol Myers Squibb

Capri Holdings

Costa

Carita Paris

CareTrust REIT

Caterpillar

Coach

Cappy

Caudalie

CeraVe

Check Point Software Technologies

Cerelac

Chanel

Chapman and Cutler

Channel

Cheerios

Cheetos

Chevron

Chips Ahoy!

Christina Aguilera

Citi Bank

Codral

Cosco

Canada Dry

Citi

Clal Insurance Enterprises

Clean & Clear

Clearblue

Clinique

Champion

Club Social

Coca Cola

Coffee Mate

Colgate

Comcast

Compass

Caesars

Conde Nast

Cooley LLP

Costco

Côte d’Or

Crest

CV Starr

CyberArk Software

Cytokinetics

Crayola

Cra Z Art

Daimler

Dr Pepper

Del Valle

Daim

Doctor Pepper

Dasani

Doritos

Daz

Dior

Dell

Deloitte

Delta Air Lines

Deutsche Bank

Deutsche Telekom

DHL Group

David Off

Disney

DLA Piper

Domestos

Domino’s

Douglas Elliman

Downy

Duane Morris LLP

Dreft Baby Detergent & Laundry Products

Dreyer’s Grand Ice Cream

eBay

Edelman

Eli Lilly

Evian

Empyrean

Ericsson

Endeavor

EPAM Systems

Estee Lauder

Elbit Systems

EY

Forbes

Facebook

Fairlife

Fanta

First International Bank of Israel

Fiverr

Funyuns

Fuze

Fox News

Fritos

Fox Corp

Gatorade

Gamida Cell

GE

Glamglow

General Catalyst

General Motors

Georgia

Gold Peak

Genesys

Goldman Sachs

Grandma’s Cookies

Garnier

Guess

Greenberg Traurig

Guerlain

Givenchy

H&M

Hadiklaim

Huggies

Hanes

HSBC

Head & Shoulders

Hersheys

Herbert Smith Freehills

Hewlett Packard

Hasbro

Hyundai

Henkel

Harel Insurance Investment & Financial Services

Hewlett Packard Enterprise

HubSpot

Huntsman Corp

IBM

Innocent

Insight Partners

Inditex Group

IT Cosmetics

Instacart

Intermedia

Interpublic Group

Instagram

ICL Group

Intuit

Jazwares

Jefferies

John Lewis

JP Morgan Chase

Jaguar

Johnson & Johnson

JPMorgan

Kenon Holdings

Kate Spade

Kirks’

Kinley Water

KKR

KFC

KKW Cosmetics

Kurkure

Keebler

Kolynos

Kaufland

Kevita

Knorr

KPMG

Lemonade

Lidl

Loblaws

Levi Strauss

Louis Vuitton

Life Water

Levi’s

Levi’s Strauss

LinkedIn

Land Rover

L’Oréal

Lego

Levissima

Live Nation Entertainment

Lufthansa

La Roche-Posay

Lipton

Major League Baseball

Manpower Group

Marriott

Marsh McLennan

Maison Francis Kurkdjian

Mastercard

Mattel

Minute Maid

Monster

Monki

Mainz FC

Mellow Yellow

Mountain Dew

Migdal Insurance

Marks & Spencer

Mirinda

McDermott Will & Emery

Motorola

McKinsey

Merck

Michael Kors

Mizrahi Tefahot Bank

Merck KGaA

Micheal Kors

Milkybar

Maybelline

Mount Franklin

Meta

MeUndies

Mattle

Microsoft

Munchies

Miranda

Morgan Lewis

Moroccanoil

Morgan Stanley

MRC

Nasdaq

Naughty Dog

Nivea

Next

NOS

Nabisco

Nutter Butter

No Frills

National Basketball Association

National Geographic

Nintendo

New Balance

Nutella

Newtons

NVIDIA

Netflix

Nescafe

Nestle

Nesquick

Nike

Nussbeisser

Oreo

Oral B

Old spice

Oysho

Omeprazole

Oceanspray

Opodo

P&G (Procter and Gamble)

Pampers

Pull & Bear

Pepsi

Pfizer

Popeyes

Parker Pens

Philadelphia Cream Cheese

Pizza Hut

Powerade

Purina

Phoenix Holdings

Propel

Ponds

Pure Leaf Green Tea

Power Action Wipes

PwC

Prada

Perry Ellis

Prada Eyewear

Pringles

Payoneer

Procter & Gamble

Purelife

Pureology

Quaker Oats

Reddit

Royal Bank of Canada

Ruffles

Revlon

Ralph Lauren

Ritz

Rolls Royce

Royal

S.Pellegrino

Sabra Hummus

Sabre

Sony

SAP

Simply

Smart Water

Sprite

Schwabe

Shell

Soda Stream

Siemens

StreamElements

Schweppes

Sunsilk

Signal

Skittles

Smart Food

Sobe

Smarties

Sephora

Sam’s Club

Superbus

Samsung

Sodastream

Sunkist

Scotiabank

Sour Patch Kids

Starbucks

Sadaf

Stride

Subway

Tang

Tate’s Bake Shop

The Body Shop

Tesco

Twitch

The Ordinary

Tim Hortons

Tostitos

Timberland

Topo Chico

Tapestry

Tropicana

Tommy Hilfiger

Tommy Hilfiger Toiletries

Turbos

Tom Ford

Taco Bell

Triscuit

TUC

Twix

Tottenham Hotspurs

Twisties

Tripadvisor

Uber

Uber Eats

Urban Decay

Upfield

Unilever

Vicks

Victoria’s Secret

V8

Vaseline

Vitaminwater

Volkswagen

Volvo

Walmart

Wegmans

WhatsApp

Waitrose

Woolworths

Wheat Thins

Walkers

Warner Brothers

Warner Chilcot

Warner Music

Wells Fargo

Winston & Strawn

WingStreet

Wissotzky Tea

WWE

Wheel Washing Powder

Wrigley Company

YouTube

Yvel

Yum Brands

Ziyad

Zara

Zim Shipping

Ziff Davis

[on-a-lucky-tide]

Gaz trains new recruits to outlast and outlive the most brutal interrogations. It takes its toll and Nik is there to pick up the pieces after a particularly difficult session.

cw: mention of torture, best friends Nik and Gaz.

They had been led into the wilderness at gunpoint and made to sit on the ground, their hands behind their heads, for three hours while they waited. Every time their arms dropped, one of their captors pistol whipped them or kicked their ribs until they sat up and returned to their appropriate position. Gaz had arrived in a jeep on time and made them listen to his boots grind through the dirt and each other's grunts as he shoved them about.

He had kept them hooded and stripped them naked, made them stand in the cold and the lashing rain, their backs bent, their bodies exposed to fuck knows what. One called for the umpire, the humiliation of having one of their captors jeer at his 'little prick' shrivelling in the cold was too much. The rest had said their names, their ranks, their serial numbers. Good lads.

He had deprived them of sleep, made them lose track of time, made them stand until their knees gave in and then hauled them to their feet, screaming in their faces. Two called for the umpire after two days. The rest had said their names, their ranks, their serial numbers.

He whipped the soles of their feet with his belt and made them stand in stress positions against the wall, their naked bodies so pale they were turning blue. They lasted. It was when he got to the final phase, their minds broken down to their limit, bodies starved, hungry and cold, that he brought pictures of their families in.

It was the photo of one little girl that stuck in his craw. Usually the recruits were too young to have families. Sometimes they might have a wife, but he'd usually go for their mothers, threatening the most heinous shit until they were begging to tell him what he wanted to know.

This one had a three year old.

Stupid fumble when he was sixteen along with an otherwise Catholic upbringing meant he was a father at nineteen.

Gaz stood staring at the little girl while the trooper sat hooded before him, and had to search deep to find the arsehole that would threaten her life, her innocence. When he tore that hood off and thrust the picture in the lad's face, he saw the horror only a father could show when a monster held his baby at gunpoint. "Tell me, or I'm gonna find her, and I'm gonna have myself even more fun than I've had with you."

The lad broke in twenty minutes. No food, no sleep, no warmth, his mind shredded, he melted down to primal hysterics at the thought of the animal that had brought him so low getting to his daughter. It took two paramedics to support him.

Gaz called it ten minutes later and they headed back to base. The remaining four had passed successfully.

He sat on the roof of the hanger, his legs dangling over the edge, a bottle of Evian clutched in his shaking hands, and tried to find his peace. There was a base therapist on call, but she wouldn't be able to get through the roiling mess of darkness warping his mind in that moment.

Gaz startled as two booted feet appeared at his side. Their owner slumped down moments later, his brown leather jacket brushed against Gaz's puffer jacket. "It is cold up here, sergeant."

"Yeah, needed to clear my head."

"The interrogation training was a success, I hear. The captain is pleased."

"Mm."

Nik reached inside his jacket and pulled out a small bottle of vodka. The cap cracked as he twisted it and Gaz listened to the liquid slosh against glass as Nik took a swig. When Nik offered it across, he shook his head, "Naw, I shouldn't, I've got paperwork."

"Paperwork can wait until the soul has steadied. Drink the vodka. I am pulling rank."

"Nik, you don't have a rank, mate," Gaz said, smiling.

"I was a captain before I left the air force. I maintain it as an honorary rank."

"You're full of shit."

"Even if I am," Nik conceded, "I have your captain in my backpocket and I am sure I could convince him you need to go on leave."

"Cold."

"Baltic, as I believe Sergeant MacTavish would say."

Gaz took the bottle with a chuckle, shaking his head. The vodka wasn't of English origin but Russian and it burned its way down his throat like nothing he'd ever tasted, his eyes watering. "Ahh, fuck me, you lot are next level with this shit."

"Da. It is a national pastime," Nik said, taking the bottle back. They sat in silence for a moment, watching a little fixed wing biplane taxi down the runway for take off.

"Could you fly that?"

"Da."

"Is there an aircraft you couldn't fly?"

Nik scratched his chin thoughtfully. "They have just released a new Sukhoi, I would have to train myself on the new technology."

"A new Sukhoi?"

"Da."

"Nik, that is a fighter jet."

"Da."

"Fuck, you're insanely cool. Leave some badarsery for us mortals."

Nik gave him the side eye and then elbowed his arm. Gaz chuckled, and they fell silent again. The sun was setting and it would be dark soon. Hereford was beautiful this time of year, with all the oranges and golds of autumn splashed over the woodlands. Woodlands in which Gaz had just tortured their own people. His shoulders slouched.

"How do you do it? What Price asks you to do."

Nik didn't need to ask for specifics. He knew why they were sitting on the roof of a hanger on a late autumn evening. "I do what needs to be done to achieve our goal. I believe your captain says it best: we get our hands dirty, so that others can stay clean."

"Doesn't it eat you? Doesn't it like... get up in here," he tapped his temple, "make you worry you're... a fuckin' monster, like you don't deserve to... to be around normal people."

"Sometimes," Nik said. "But I made my peace with it a long time ago. You will too."

"It's the kids, man. The... one of 'em, they had a daughter and I..."

Nik nodded and let Gaz lapse into silence. He lifted a hand to settle on his shoulder. "You are a good man, Kyle Garrick. When I say you make your peace, I do not mean you will stop feeling... this. If you did, you would not be you."

"Then maybe I'm not cut out for this. Maybe I should..." he swallowed, "...maybe I should leave."

"It is precisely because you feel this way that you are cut for this. Do you think Price is heartless?"

"No, he's... He's just... He's Price. Some kinda superhuman motherfuckin' SAS machine."

Nik chuckled. "Nyet, John is human. Very human."

There was something tender in the way that Nik said Price's name that made Gaz look up, his brow furrowed. Very human. "How many times have you had this conversation with him?"

"Many times. Not on so many roofs, but... the words have been the same. The look on his face."

"Seriously?"

"Da." Nik placed his hands between his thighs to keep his fingers warm, swinging his legs. "He threw a hostage off a roof once to save the others. The bomb vest they were wearing... He couldn't get it off. I found him pacing his office like a lion trapped in a tiny cage. The cage was in his head, made of self doubt and anger. He was telling himself there had been a way but he just had not seen it."

Gaz nodded. "How did you.. how did he come round?"

"By realising he is just a man. He made a choice so someone else did not have to. He saved lives. The greater good. Just as your specialism saves lives. That young man may survive one day because of what you taught him."

Gaz sighed and took the vodka back for another swig. "I guess we all gotta figure out just how far we're willing to go for our greater good."

"Da."

"Has Price?"

Nik hummed. "I think... if you stop wondering, then it is time to stop altogether. Every choice has consequences. If we do not consider them, then we are not governed by any good."

Perhaps it was the vodka, or even the relief Gaz felt with Nik at his side, the realisation that even his hero felt the way he did, that sometimes he just needed to work through it to the otherside, but he shook his head, smiling. "You Tolstoy talkin' motherfucker, wow. Have you thought about writing?"

"I might have dabbled..."

"No. Way. Nik, please... I need to see."

"Nyet, it is private."

Gaz gasped. "Is it... Is it saucy? Nik, did you write smut?"

Nik folded his arms and raised his eyebrow.

"Nik, Nik, please... Oh, oh, is it about Price? Nik, is it about Price? It's about Price, oh my god."

"I will throw you off this building if you tell him."

Gaz whooped and cackled, falling onto his back in the gravel. Nik watched him, grinning, and snatched the vodka back for a swig.

Gaz was a good man. He would be fine. Sometimes the greater good took chunks of you with it, but humans were hardy, they could heal, bounce back. With the right people around them, of course.

[literaryobsession]

— bakugo headcanon

bkg doesn't like animals. he thinks that you shouldn't get a dog or cat or a turtle or whatever crap you want to ruin the carpet in your home with.

however when you do pick up a stray kitten and adopt it as your own, it seems to follow bkg around. its little feet would pitter patter on the wooden floor, following behind the grumpy blond.

bkg would be annoyed at first.

but like most people who do not like pets, they eventually warm up to them.

at first you find bkg playing with the kitten with a random string, chuckling to himself about how the stupid little thing would be amused by a mere string.

then you would find bkg bathing the kitten in the kitchen sink, commenting that the annoying brat smelled so bad that he finally had to bath him. you even noticed how he seemed to have bought flea shampoo too — the expensive kind.

you spotted him pick out treats for the hyper rug you have at home. bkg was even buying little pet clothes for the kitten, whipping out his black card for the purchase.

bkg also started buying salmon and Evian water for his tiny baby. he would take photos and videos, the kitten finally replaced you as bkg's wallpaper.

you glanced over at him, who was laying on the sofa and unable to move with the kitten sleeping on his chest and realized that bkg didn't like animals, he loved them.

[phoenixtakaramono]

SUGAR BABY AU THREADFIC - PART III

(You can read the rest of the threadfic update here!)

Keep in mind, all of my AU Butchlander threadfics on Twitter are the unpolished first draft versions of what'll eventually be polished up into long fics on AO3 under the Shock and Awe series. So you may regard this threadfic as an experimental first prototype and exclusive preview whose contents may or may not be changed in the future final draft version. We’re just loosely playing around with ideas and concepts for now!

If you don't have a Twitter account, screenshots are provided below the line break so you can read this update on Tumblr as well:

TBC

(A/N) - Notice how the Evian bottled water mentioned earlier finally serves its purpose here? And peep at the mention of Billy's bare wrist—when it'd been mentioned he'd been wearing a Rolex watch prior when he'd entered Homelander's penthouse. :) The watch will come into play later; a classic underhanded CIA tactic to orchestrate a second meeting with the target.

Cut Content: Mirrorlander almost made an appearance in this update, where HL would see his own reflection approaching Billy's reflection in his mirrored bedroom...and being all handsy and just, in general, kinda creepy about it, haha. Reason why it was cut: pacing. It's also very similar to what'll show up in Truce ch4 and I didn't want to essentially rehash the same desperate obsession and tense introspection here, especially this early into this threadfic.

(The spicy 🔞 Part II 🔞 can be read here!)

If you are following along on Twitter, do let me know if you can't see the thread. 🙏 This is an ongoing experiment to see if continuing writing 🔞 threadfics is still feasible without getting sh@dowb@nned again.

[omegaremix]

Omega Radio for December 7, 2013; #37.

Aphex Twin “Come To Daddy”

Bjork “Declare Independence”

Evian Christ “Salt Carousel”

Death Grips “This Is Violence Now (Don’t Get Me Wrong)” +“Feel Like A Wheel”

CX Kidtronik “Let’s Go Krazy” (Atari Teenage Riot RMX)

Blood Of Heroes, The “Salute To The Jugger”

Prurient “A Meal Can Be Made”

Ramleh “Deathtoll”

SPK “Slogun” + “Emanation Machine R. Gie 1916”

Akitsa “Redemption”

Kevin Drumm “Turning Point”

Alberich “Open Warfare”

Pale Sketcher “Show Me How”

Sandra Electronics “It Slipped Her Mind”

Suicide “Dream Baby Dream”

Muslimgauze “An Abyssinian Who Could Kiss Fire”

Solaris BC “3.2”

Two Dogs In A House “Eliminator”

Function & Jerome Syndenham “White Light” (Silent Servant RMX)

Silent Servant “Utopian Disaster (End)”

Council Estate Electronics “Kitsland”

First Year 2 broadcast. Bonus (full) darkness show.

[warehouseradio]

Warehouse Radio Episode 68 Guest Mix: DJ Noones

LINKS: Bluesky: bsky.app/profile/djnoones.bsky.social Instagram: www.instagram.com/djnoones/

TRACKLIST:

ARIA VEIL - T!KT0K!!! evilestpetshop - That's my favorite! _skott.y and nicki minaj - this one is for the boys in the polos ૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა purityleech - I Touch Myself //purityleech & εїз ☆ DJ BINEY ☆ εїз remix // tiffany - wannabe Basside - NYC2MIA (SOPHIE Remix) SOPHIE - L.O.V.E. (Okhz Remix) Snow Strippers & Lil Uzi Vert - ᴠͥɪͣᴘͫ•It's A Dream (umru backstab) 146ᵇᵖᵐ•ᴠͥɪͣᴘͫ A. G. Cook - Silver (cyndaw remix) pewtwo! - Super Shy! frog chaser - i finally understay (𝕊𝕃𝔸𝕐 𝕄𝕀𝕏) Bladee - Dumpster Baby - brinks flip "trashcan toddler" Cascada - Everytime We Touch (thirtyonetwentyfive remix) Evian Christ & Bladee - Yxgudenᵀᴾ (Evian Christ Mix) gupi - Every Tonight (pitbull is awesome gupi 1 day remix challenge) fish - put ur paws up uwu nya rawr fuck Synova - Slumber Party In My Basement FAST&DIOS - Got Me Speeded ✧˖°. RIP AKIRA TORIYAMA :: Carly Rae Jepsen - Call Me Maybe (Audio Paradyne Bootleg) DJ Danny - On A Mountain (JAKAZiD Bootleg) ithinkitsadanny - hello goodbye by Charli xcx but it's also Language by Porter Robinson

[desire-mona]

randomly assigning house md characters internet moments / videos / memories / whatever i remember based off nothing at all (i did i dps version too) (also links for everything i talk about will be provided) (also also this isnt made to make fun of anyone involved in any of this)

house - mr beast and his OLD OLD youtube videos, like circa 2015? i think? he used to make cringe compilations essentially where he just made fun of kids' youtube intros. face and all like nothing was blurred for privacy, and then he'd call them cringe and make drinking bleach jokes. like a LOT. i binge watched those back in like 4th grade i think? maybe 5th? so thats kinda all i associate him with now. he also made videos where he would say a word like a thousand times, sometimes WAY more (like 100k+). or like. count to that number, he did both. anyway rip house you wouldve loved making fun of kids' youtube videos

wilson - does anyone remember the evian baby commercials? i think the whole shtick was like "this water makes you feel young again" I THINK? the one i linked was the one where the reflection on a building makes ppl babies, but theres one where babies are on roller skates or whatever too. this isnt entirely an internet moment as much as it is just a memory, cuz i remember my mom and my aunt DYING laughing at these commercials. idk what it was they were just in tears. theres something so 2007-2015 about dancing babies. wasnt a dancing baby the first internet meme? just googled it and yes it was.

cuddy - onision's shitty spoken word songs PLEASE tell me someone remembers them. onision really shouldve stopped trying to make music after the banana song bc the rest really suck shit. this is NOT based on vibes i gotta get that out there, i was like hmm cuddy has a kid. you know who else has a kid? YOU KNOW WHO LET THEIR KID FALL OUT OF A WINDOW? cuddy would fucking HATE onision. ALSO OH MY GOD PAUSE EVERYTHING ONISION JUST UPLOADED A SONG. I NEED TO MAKE A SEPERATE POST ABOUT THIS RIGHT NOW WHAT THE HELL. anyway dont watch it. i linked strange æon's video on his music just bc i really dont wanna direct u to anything of his directly. did u know i dont like onision?

foreman - the most insane youtube poop ive ever seen in all of my 19 years of living, i sent this to maddie specifically when i made my initial "like for a rando internet moment!" post but i really need to share it with the general public. general warning for youtube poop-ness; flash, loud noises, overwhelming, etc. i am actually begging you to watch this because it tops every other ytp ive ever seen, like actually blows it out of the water. i also has no idea ppl still made ytps after 2014 tbh.... btw this is probably the only ytp that i'll ever recommend LMAO

chase - OH MY GOD KYLERLOVESJESUS. so basically this one eboy influencer type on tiktok back in 2019 Found God and went on rants about how abortion is wrong and gay marriage is bad and blah blah blah. there was this moment on one of his lives where he went "i love gay people, i would be best friends with a gay person. do i support it? no." which was the FUNNIEST shit back in the day. i would quote it on the daily. btw the editing of the video i linked is VERY of the time so beware LMAO

cameron - cutie the kitten (sans' wife and gf) + the killing videos sans fan girls would make. i actually cant link anything bc the channel doesnt exist anymore but! basically back in 2016ish there was this one girl who had such a crush on sans and she had a whole ocxcanon situation with sans and her pink cat oc Cutie. a lot of ppl hated her + the ppl who had ocs shipped with sans but looking back its truly not a big deal. what is a big deal is that she (? maybe?) and other sans fangirls would make animated slideshow videos of their ocs using powers or whatever to kill other sans fangirls. like brutally. it was a wild time i wish cutie's channel was still up so i could prove thats a real thing, but ask an undertale fan from back then and odds are theyll know. heres a sans fangirl cringe compilation so you kinda know what im talking about, but fair warning it is a cringe compilation so. it wont be nice.

thirteen - TW INCEST!! this one hamilton animatic i saw back in forever ago to the song 'helpless'. usually animatics to that song use eliza and hamilton (im not a hamilton fan this is very surface lvl knowledge btw) but the one i saw was eliza and ANGELICA. like as in HER SISTER. big surprise someone in a big fandom ships incest wow I KNOW its tame compared to other shit, but it was i think my first exposure to anything like that circa 2017ish, so it kinda stuck in the brain. also the video i linked isnt the og its a phil collins mashup, the og got taken down. hamilton always makes an appearance in my house posts doesnt it, be lucky i didnt give kutner this one bc ppl were turn up abt hamilton fan kutner.

taub - WHAT DO YALL KNOW ABOUT MIKE AND MELISSA ⁉️⁉️ basically mike and melissa is this animated passion project this guy made to show himself (or his persona? or maybe just some guy) falling in love with his fursona that comes to life. this was the only episode this guy uploaded and i think he kinda disappeared after. the plot is kinda hard to follow and its not TERRIBLY animated but its certainly not professional looking. there's a video about what happened to him uploaded like 5 months ago, but i havent watched it. when i first heard of mike n melissa i fully thought it was a mid 2000s family sitcom but it definitely Is Not That.

kutner - undertale sans au christmas party comic dub. i probably dont need to give an explanation as to what sans aus are but idk how many ex or current undertale fans follow me so i'll do it anyway. making au's for undertale was a pretty common practice back in its early days, and usually the most popular character in any undertale variation is sans. who sans is shipped with was always up in the air, so much like the onceler, ppl ended up shipping sans with other au versions of himself. this christmas party comic is in my mind the undertale fandom equivalent of camp weehawken. i think there was also a sans au comic where all the sans' except for like 2 were toddlers at daycare? i dont remember who the adult sans' were but also i think the creator got into hot water? dont remember why.

[hero-israel]

Thanks to it being Nakba Day, I woke up to a Vox on why those evil cruel Je-we mean Zionists destroyed the poor helpless Palestinians! Discussions of the 1948 war are where nuance go to die: on the one side we have Jews who have no particular belief that non-Jews anywhere would support their right to exist (as Jews or as, you know, alive people) aggressively asserting the continued existence of Israel (and in the process displacing many Palestinians) and on the other we have Arabs in Mandate Palestine who wish for self-determination in the land they consider home, who decide to defend that self-determination by advocating for genocidal ethnic cleansing of Jews, supported by Arab armies much stronger than anything the Haganah or anyone else could put forward. Nobody's hands were clean in those days

I sometimes ask "just-critics" what they think would have happened to the Jews if they'd lost in 1948 (or 67 or 73). Without fail, they get mad and dodge the question - or straight-up assert all the Zio colonizers would have deserved it and still do.

There can be no judgment of 1948 that leaves out Hebron 1929, leaves out Evian 1938, Husseini and Qaukji allying with Nazi Germany, "a war of extermination and a momentous massacre that will be spoken of like the Mongol massacres and the Crusades." Europe still keeping the Jews in Dachau under German guards, America still keeping immigration restrictions. There would have been no refugee camps, no UNRWA, for the Jews of Palestine. They would have been exterminated down to the last baby. There can be no commemorating the Nakba without acknowledging that.

[lookingupatthesamemoon]

rye's f/o roster :3

(last updated 12/01/24)

i know i have all of my f/os listed on my carrd, but i also wanted to have a post listing them all here !!! it will remain linked on my pinned post and i will do my best to keep it up to date !!! i will also be making more in-depth lore posts for each of my ships throughout the month (well, at least my primary and secondary ships), which will be linked here as well as i post them !!! :)

(names in pink i'm not comfortable sharing !!! others doubles are totally welcome to interact !!! i will say that my attitude on this can ebb and flow depending on how fixated i am on each f/o so keep an eye on that i guess 😭)

MAIN: ♡ JOE DIRT - Joe Dirt (2001) Joe and i have been together since March 2021 :) !!! we’ve been married since August 2022 :) !!! he was my first ever official f/o and he means the world to me !!! i treat my ship with him as my primary relationship irl - i’m arospec so i don’t have much interest in “real” relationships and my ship with him fulfills my own personal romantic needs :). 

→ ship tag: same moon → lore guide (coming soon) → playlist

PRIMARIES: ♡ JOHN WICK - John Wick franchise → S/I: Katana → ship tag: continental consequences → lore guide → playlist

♡ KENDALL ROY - Succession → S/I: Gogh → ship tag: corporate connection → lore guide → playlist

♡ RALPH CIFARETTO - The Sopranos → S/I: Beatrix → ship tag: gladiator's paradise → lore guide (coming soon) → playlist

♡ RICKY LAFLEUR - Trailer Park Boys → S/I: Summer → ship tag: canadian scumbags → lore guide (coming soon) → playlist (in progress)

SECONDARIES: ♡  ALAN HARPER - Two and a Half Men → S/I: Kaye → ship tag: blueberry pancakes → lore guide (coming soon) → playlist (in progress)

♡ FRANKENSTEIN’S CREATURE - Frankenstein (1931) → S/I: Winnifred → ship tag: bolts & all → lore guide (coming soon) → playlist (in progress)

♡ COOPER ABBOTT - Trap (2024) → S/I: Harper → ship tag: love is a trap → lore guide → playlist

♡ WILLY WONKA - Wonka (2023) → S/I: Bonnie → ship tag: sugar rush → lore guide → playlist (in progress)

TERTIARIES: ♡ DOM TORETTO - Fast & Furious franchise → S/I: Callie → ship tag: rearview romance → lore guide (coming soon) → playlist

♡ RAJ KOOTHRAPPALI - The Big Bang Theory → S/I: Astrid → ship tag: it's not rocket science ! → lore guide (coming soon) → playlist (in progress)

♡ ETHAN CHANDLER - Penny Dreadful → S/I: Clara → ship tag: howling at the moon → lore guide (coming soon) → playlist (in progress)

♡ NEIL FAK - The Bear → S/I: Evian → ship tag: front of house → lore guide (coming soon) → playlist (in progress)

♡ BABY BILLY FREEMAN - The Righteous Gemstones → S/I: Ruby → ship tag: televangelism → lore guide (coming soon) → playlist (in progress)

♡ DARIUS - Atlanta → S/I: Juno → ship tag: TBD → lore guide (coming soon)

♡ WILLIAM MURDERFACE - Metalocalypse  → S/I: Arachne → ship tag: TBD

♡ REVEREND ROD PUTTY - Moral Orel → S/I: Annie → ship tag: TBD

♡ SONNY CROCKETT - Miami Vice (2006) → S/I: TBD → ship tag: TBD

and of course, basically any friends of these romantic f/os are platonic f/os to me :) !!!

dividers by @/saradika :)

[peapodsinspace]

name suggestions for @gayfraggle ‘s oc cus it’s easier to put it all here than in a comment

:]

(According to baby name websites)

Masc and androgynous names with E

-Elliot

-Eddie

-Ellis

-Emery / Emory

-Ezra /Ezri

-Eris

-Erin

-Evren

-Echo

-Evian

Capital E no longer looks like a letter to me /silly

These are just from two searches (for masc and then for androgynous) so it’s not an extensive list!

[arsenalgbt]

ben and baby ethan part 4: in which mummy is down with flu :(

It’s a nasty kind of summertime flu, and Ben has to leave Ethan under Declan and Kai’s care. Kieran and Leo are on a holiday to Belgium with their kids, and Declan boasts that he’s been well-acquainted with Kai’s five-year-old stepbrother, aka The Big Spider. Ethan is a much calmer toddler; they will get along just fine.

Later that night, Declan sends a photo of Ethan sleeping on his side, mouth open, and one chubby hand on top of Kai’s bump.

The next day, Ethan is busy colouring on the floor with Kai’s dogs on either side of him like cute gargoyles. Ben demands a FaceTime right after Declan sends him that exact picture. Kai is in the background, lying on the sofa with his ankles elevated on a bunch of cushions, eating crunchy pretzels with hummus. He’s due in a couple of weeks tops.

“Ethan, look who’s calling,” Declan says, gently brushing Ethan’s hair to get his attention.

Ethan frowns, but once it clicks that it’s his Mummy, he grins toothily, staring at the screen with his big brown eyes, probably wondering why it is Mummy on the other side and not Pops and Nana.

“Do you want to show Mummy what you’ve been working on?” Declan says from where he’s contorted next to the German shepherd.

Ethan nods, pointing at his colouring book. “Lions. Zebras. Giraffes. Rhinos.”

“Good job, baby,” Ben coos. “What did you eat for breakfast? Tell Mummy.”

“Eggs, yummy.” Ethan answers, climbing onto Declan’s lap and rearranging the phone so he can see Ben better. “Uncle Kai eggs.”

Kai waves, grinning.

“Aww, thank you Uncle Kai. And what else did you have, baby?”

“Banana milk.”

“Banana milk?” Ben gasps because how wonderful! He’s not sure he ever tried banana milk. “Did you like it?”

Ethan nods. “Can I have again, Uncle Declan?” he asks, craning his neck. Declan agrees, kissing his cheek. “Thank you. Mummy wants?”

Ben can’t help but coo. His son is just the best. “That sounds yummy, of course.”

“It’s homemade, don’t worry,” Declan chimes in, “it’s not sweet.”

“Thanks, Decs.”

“Nah. But how are you? How’s the flu?”

“I’m still aching everywhere. Nose’s cleared, though.” Ben sighs, pouring hot water from a Thermos into a glass of Evian. “Thanks so much for doing this. Let’s see if I’m better tomorrow.”

“Was thinking of taking Ethan to Legoland tomorrow,” Declan answers, “if that’s alright?”

“Ohhh, baby, did you hear that?” Ben says after drinking the warm water. “We’ve never been. Will Kai be okay? Or is he staying home?”

“I would love to, but Declan won’t let me,” Kai answers, pouting. “He is a child whisperer now, Ben. I’m not biased, I promise.”

Ben and Declan laugh. Ethan smiles.

“Mummy?”

“Yes, baby?”

“Your nose is red, Mummy.”

“It is, isn’t it?”

Ethan stares and stares, touching the screen with a chubby, curious finger.

“Mummy?”

“Yes, baby?”

“Are you okay, Mummy? I can sing for you.”

Kai literally bawls, hands over his mouth, and Declan hugs Ethan tighter, swaying him, kissing his cheek again.

Ben doesn’t remember the last time he’s been smiling this long, heart full of love and nothing else.

previous parts here!

[tiagssssspace]

7038634357 - Afterall (snufkin stoker edit); Erwan Sene - Lowghost; Kointähti - Hearth; Andriy Kostyukov - shelest dub pt.1; CORIN - sunta; Europa - Bacon Boy; dj lostboi - SEE INSIDE; Evian Christ - Trance Party; Croatian Amor - My Brother (is a Star); fαɳɳყ - pearl┗(｀Дﾟ中; Murrettumeri - trance369; BABY KEEM & KENDRICK LAMAR - THE HILLBILLIES (BLOOD OF AZA REMIX); Snufkin – DJ Baby?! (Kablam x Sega Bodega).

Visuals by @vvverse

<3

tiags.space/4k-lento/oxymoron/ ‎

[inyourheartifoundahome]

A VERY DESCRIPTIVE PROFILE OF YOUR MUSE. Repost with the information of your muse, including headcanons, etc. if you fail to achieve some of the facts, add some other of your own!

name: Suéli Olivia Carvalho nickname: Sue (only by her Dad), Oliv, Liv, Latina, Kate, Kätzchen, Babe, Baby, Babs age: thirty-four species: human being sex: female/she/her nationality: portuguese, brazilian, american parents: Alvaro Cesário Carvalho & Júlia Giovanna Costa-Oliveira (divorced) pets: black cat named Roméo interests: every kind of Art and interior design, extravagant fashion, fine dining (food & cooking in general), red wine profession: art dealer and curator at the MET eyes: dark green with tiny amber details hair: wavy dark brown (but she owns a couple of wigs) skin: tanned like a caramel chocolate brownie with a couple of little personal tattoos all over her body face: some darker freckles on her nose and cheeks, natural messy brows and a concise cupid's bow posture: trained curvy with big hips and well shaped thighs height: 170 cm voice: light and bubbly, sometimes crispy with that typical nyc accent signature outfit: on work days she wears often wide shaped office trousers and a slightly oversized jacket with heels; in private she loves to combine a chunky extravagant pair of jeans with basic tops and lots of golden rings, earrings and bracelets (on cold days she loves to steal oversized hoodies from @coltonxmassey or @brutalcharm) significant other: @coltonxmassey companions: @brutalcharm & @onlyfemmefatale strengths: ‚family first’-attitude, strong-willed and down-to-earth; always optimistic (maybe a little too much), not that type of drama queen as she looks like (ok a little Drama sleeps in her, she’s Latina) weaknesses: trust issues and the fear of getting hurt or being abandoned, sometimes her temper controls her mind colors: burgundy, olive green, black drinks: red wine, bellini, evian water drivers license: owns a black mercedes g-wagon, but she rarely drives it, cause of the traffic in nyc

(fyi: some of this facts are not guaranteed and can change within a month.)

tagged by: @brutalcharm

tagging: @coltonxmassey, @onlyfemmefatale

[eurosleazarchive]

@godblooded sent: I’m red-faced and when I breathe the sounds a whistle howling through my throat like I’ve been punctured, had my trachea geared up no better than a drinking straw. I’m shaking, and there’s a delectable raspberry bloom soaking into the skintight denim around my ankle. I imagine the sickly ivory or peeking bone and Marian’s sweet baby teeth sitting inside her jaw where Natalie keene’s will never be again. There are sharp pangs tearing my calf in half; there’s bile burning in the pit of my stomach that I sizzle to dissolving with a swig of Evian vodka. My hand sweatily claws around the highball glass that’s dissonant in this filthy dive. her eyes catch mine. I push a wan smile onto my face that’s so watery it’s as iced down as this drink. “ we get outta here, sades? ” i’m asking it before she can even say hello. I think I lose three shades of color when I see her and it renders me transparent.

" -- cammy? " she looks like shit (and that's the nice way to say it). my eyes stare at her, something worried in their gaze. my lips press together for a moment. i can smell sweat, something acrid in the air and my nose scrunches in response. i hope her feelings don't get hurt-- if they do, it's something i can't control. i scratch at my wrist, the faint skin under my watch. i poke, poke, poke, sharp nail against the muscle. everything's gone to shit these past few months. it only makes sense that camille'd be taking it hard.

she got out, though. i believe she can get out of here again. i don't like the way she looks right now. it makes me think of her like a wounded bird. i want to help her. there's a worse part of me that wants to see how far i can push her. i don't want to think about that.

" i don't want you to go home alone. " and it's true. i'd be disgusted with myself if i let her go back to that house. i reach for her free hand, my own resting on top of hers. there's a bi of intimacy there, something camille can (hopefully) hold onto. " we're-- i'm taking you back to my place, alright? you're not allowed to say no. " a smile, something to soothe her.

[guesst]

For the ask game... 🎵 + Goose...from your au

OH I KNOW THIS. either

or

ask game