#Do not engage do not pass go do not collect $200

[eredins-a-king-aint-he]

For the love of whatever you hold as holy PLEASE stop engaging with hate asks, anon or not

Getting these asks isn’t a fun status symbol, it’s a shitty and sad thing that continues to happen because it’s getting fed

It might be exciting to fire back a witty response to these asks, but giving them direct attention and exposure by replying only encourages them, and encouraging them is detrimental to the entire community in the long run

DELETE, BLOCK, AND MOVE ON

Spread positivity instead of nastiness! Engage with a creator you like but have never spoken to and ask them a question you’ve wanted to ask for a while, or just say smth nice about their work! Make art!! Write fic!! Delete the hate asks/block the blog that sent them and reblog something you enjoy instead!!

[badbuge]

EMIZEL!!!!!!!!!!!

[oneknightstand-if]

Another episode of ask the ROs by a questionable Mc :

"Would you marry me?"

♡offers flowers and an access to life full of nonsense and hugs♡

That's going to depend upon the relationship status and the point in the timeline regarding what kind of reactions the MC would garner here. Assuming a romanced RO towards the end of the series...

Note: Some of these are lies.

Merlin: Has the apocalypse ended in an non-cataclysmic fashion? Then they're already in their wedding dress/tux. 👰 Otherwise too busy apocalypsing for that.

Adrian: Did you successfully complete his subplot? If yes, he'll agree... although you might need reassure him a few hundred times that this is really what you want. If not, Do not pass GO, do not collect $200.

Arthur: He's not the type to get married after a couple of months... especially not with the responsibilities that his spouse would have. You'll have to take it slowly here, MC.

Percy: He might've accidentally proposed to you already. Several of the other ROs have been assuming you were married for awhile.

4̷0̷4̴ ̶E̶r̷r̷o̶r̷ ̸N̷o̴t̸ ̴F̷o̴u̵n̷d̴: REALLY?! Uh... maybe in a couple years to indulge the MC, but certainly not by the end of the series.

Cassandra: Did you successfully complete her subplot? If not, Do not pass GO, do not collect $200. Otherwise, she'd be up for that once things have settled down if you [DATA EXPUNGED]

Gwen: She's probably been dropping hints the entire time during the apocalypse. Heck, she probably already proposed to the MC herself at this point.

Vivian: She's going to need to hear the exact terms of this contract. Warning: Marrying a fae can have unexpected side effects.

Lorelei: Did you successfully complete her subplot? Is anyone hearing an echo in here? Once everything has settled down in the series epilogue, she'd definitely accept, but it'd have to be a long-term engagement.

Broderick:

[sergeifyodorov]

hello i have been into hockey for exactly 1 week and 3 days and in those 10 days it has consumed my entire life i have tickets to an ahl game tomorrow and tickets for the ducks in march

HELLO WELCOME TO THE HOCKEY SPIRAL!!!!!!!!! DO NOT PASS GO DO NOT COLLECT 200 DOLLARS YOU CAN AND WILL BE HERE FOREVER

TIPS AND TRICKS FROM A VILLAGE IDIOT EXPERT

asking people about general hockey stuff eg history/strategy/"who is X and why do people care about him" is 1000% encouraged at all times for ever and ever !!! people here love hockey and want to get people more into hockey

a major part/most of/the entirety of???? the fun of hockey is talking about it to other people actually !!!! we love talking about hockey !!! i have met friends through hockey lets gooooo

when i say "you can and will be here forever" i mean if you survive your first offseason and you're still just as into hockey as you were before. it's over. singularity passed. good luck escaping

again, some of this can get really complicated !! the nhl salary cap for example is a whole System that there are individual guys employed by a lot of teams purely to know. you DON'T have to know everything about the systems of hockey but hell fuckin yeah if you want to

because high level hockey is essentially a socially conservative cult of masculinity/old boys club like no old boys have ever clubbed before, you . Will encounter moral questionability. the amount u want to engage with this is up to you

you have to yell shoot when your team is on the power play

next one's important

EVEN IF YOUR TEAM DOESN'T MAKE THE PLAYOFFS. WATCH THE PLAYOFFS. a good playoff game as a neutral observer is a top 5 feeling. a good playoff game as an invested fan is a top 2 feeling. the playoffs are the most fun time on hockeyblr AND in hockey because the drama is up to 11 and the hockey is up to 12. there is always one game that goes until like 1 in the morning. there is always a player we suddenly realize we RABIDLY care about. there is always tragedy and brutal bloody victory and fistfights and players who are visibly in agony but keep going anyway and sometimes. your team will win the stanley cup

[thevanslut]

if you hate beron, do not engage with this, do not pass go. do not collect $200...

and for CAULDRON'S SAKE ⚠️ DO NOT ⚠️ READ MORE

beron x reader less than 600 words. I was tipsy when writing this and never had any intention of publishing until SOME PEOPLE (who will remain unnamed) asked to read. Congrats. Hope the prize was worth the pain of reading this LOL.

You had worked in the Forest House your whole life, having been born into a family that had served the Vanserras’ for generations. At first, you were nothing but one of the household servants, but you slowly worked your way up to one of the Lady of Autumn’s maids. That is until her husband took note of you. You hadn’t meant to capture Beron’s attention. But you started noticing how his eyes followed you across the room, how they roamed over your figure as you served his meals, and how his mouth would barely curl into a predatory smile when you finally met his gaze. Without fail, a shiver would run down your spine. 

And now, thrashing against the silken sheets of his bed, you felt that same shiver down your spine as he moaned against your wet cunt, tongue licking the swollen bud between your legs. 

“I told you to stay still,” he said, slipping a finger inside you, pumping it gently before adding a second. You whimpered at the sensation. His fingers were enough to make you feel too full. Turning your head away, you closed your eyes to imagine anyone else between your legs- one of his beautiful sons, perhaps. But with the heady scent of your combined arousals, it was impossible to mistake Beron for anyone else.

“Eyes on me,” his voice rumbled, and you quickly returned your gaze to the high lord crouched between your thighs. His amber eyes met your own, and you nearly came from that alone. His fingers moved faster now, the sounds of your arousal obscene as he thrust them into your core. Without warning, he curled his fingers, rubbing that spot inside you. 

“Fuck,” you whined, back arching off the bed. The feeling was unbearable now, his fingers relentlessly pressing against you until he had you nearly sobbing. “Please,” you begged him. “Please let me come.” 

At your words, he pulled his hand from you entirely. His fingers glistened, and strings of your arousal stretched between them.

“Please, what?” 

“Please let me come, sir,” you said.

“Not yet.” 

With this, he turned you over, shoving your face into the pillows. You could hear him unbuckling his belt and the linen of his pants drop to the floor. 

Soon, you felt the head of his cock press against your entrance. Without warning, he pushed in, gripping your ass so you couldn’t move away. In moments, he was sheathed inside and began thrusting, hitting the deepest parts of you. He was relentless, the size of him stretching you perfectly, bringing you closer to release. Every time you felt yourself about to fall apart under him, Beron would change his cadence, robbing you of that pleasure. 

After what felt like an eternity, the High Lord came, the feeling of his seed warm within your cunt. Leaving you at the precipice of your orgasm, he pulled out and gave your ass a tap to let you know he was finished with you. 

“I expect to see you here tomorrow,” He said. The High Lord finished dressing and turned to look at you, his stare freezing you in place. 

“Yes, sir,” you said. And despite trembling under his gaze, you couldn’t help but savor this secret between you.

[knightobreath]

if you engage too much with the discourse around a character you like then it will have a similar effect as if you were to participate mostly in fanon.

your perception and interpretation of canon will change based on how you engage with the discourse. your opinions will shift to spite people, and you'll end up believing it's canon.

this goes doubly if you refuse to accept defeat and double down when you might be wrong. You're going to close yourself off to actually understanding the media. You're isolating your takes and letting them mutate into something completely divorced from canon.

You can learn to accept parts of canon that you don't like. You can learn to accept when you're wrong or hypocritical. You can do that. I've had to do that when it comes to fandom discourse.

Anyways, if you catch yourself getting too caught up in fandom discourse, return to source material. Do not pass go do not collect $200. Reread, rewatch, and be open to changing your mind.

[chairofchaos]

A Brief Commentary on Fandom History, Fandom Weeks, and How to Keep Moving Forward

Before you decide to read this, please go read this thing I wrote earlier. You need the context. Done reading? No? Do not pass go, do not collect 200 dollars, and definitely don't engage with this post. Go read it. You're done? Excellent! Please remember that I said absolutely nothing in the aforementioned post about commenting on current events. Also, this contains some swearing, in case that bugs you. Any text written in this font I'm using below the break is liable to be sarcastic (if you want clarification about something like that let me know!). Word count is about 3.8k. Shoutout to @/olderthannetfic, who wrote back to that anon who was talking about the clergy-class of Big Name Fans and said,

"Nail your theses to the door."

I think that sentiment applies here.  Kudos to you, wise fandom elder. You rock.

About the Author

To reiterate how I began my last post (linked above and for the love of all fandom, go read it), I have been involved in fandom spaces for 12 years, almost to the day. I had wonderful mentors who knew that were I left unchecked, I would fumble my way through a lot of very bad ideas about what fandom should be like. They decided out of love that if I was going to be in fandom, they were going to make me into the best little fandom child I could be.

If you do the math, I was 11 when I started getting involved. What can I say? It was a different decade and I had unrestricted internet access. Nobody was keeping me from my Harry Potter and Percy Jackson fanfics. All of this to say: I was raised here, and I'm going to scream in the living room while this house burns down around me because I'd rather be a ghost in fandom than not be in fandom at all.

I am going to say a lot of things in this post. Am I perfect? NO! Will this post hold errors? Undoubtedly. Will this post be tarnished by the inaccuracies of the resources and the biases of events recorded in secondary sources? Who knows. I'm sure some of you lived through the events I am referencing here. Your context and commentary is more than welcome. Will this help give us, the ACOTAR fandom, some context for why we all care so much? I hope so.

No, I don't actually. I have no faith in anyone, not even myself.

Thanks for that, Editorial Chaos. You're one pessimistic bitch. Oh, you're going to keep showing up in this post to annoy me, aren't you...

Yep. Back to it, Chaos.

Alright, then. Anyways, I have opinions. You have opinions. There's a 100% chance that we disagree on something. That's cool with me. So let's get to it.

Why Are We Talking About This?

Elaingate. We are here because of Elaingate, and I will not lie to you about that. You will briefly hear my thoughts on that specific issue further down the line.

To those of you who would suggest that Elaingate is over? I must disagree. 

You see, this one instance may be over, but the underlying debate continues. What should fandom look like? Who can participate, and with what content? What is allowed, and who gets to decide?

These questions have not been addressed. I am not, by any means, going to pretend to be an authority on this. I do, however, wish to contribute my many thoughts, and present some events from the history of fandom.

My hope in sharing this brief summary of notable events which shaped broader fan culture will help people newer to fandom (of all kinds) understand why something like an event which bans certain types of content, or content involving specific characters, as something to be concerned, or even angry, about.

Please consider this, my contribution to the discussion, as a form of academic inquiry with an opinion thread throughout. This is something I am throwing to the fandom for consideration. Do I get preachy? Absolutely I do. Do I stand by my thoughts? Yes. 

If you want to respond and tell me I’m dead wrong, by all means, do so. I welcome a reblog or a post in response. Let’s go back and forth, citing our sources like two exhausted researchers from different university departments, fighting over faerie smut books. I’ll eat up every second of it.

No, you won’t. You’re exhausted.

Really? Please stop.

Noooooooooooooooooo.

Are these old issues, or is this a new problem?

Welcome to the party! It's both as old as fandom itself, and as new as yesterday. ("Chaos, those can't both be true, can they?" Yes, they can!)

You see, there have always been issues within fandoms. People have disagreed about whether character A should end up with character B or character C for longer than any of us have been alive. Seriously. The Ancient Greeks were arguing about this stuff thousands and thousands of years ago. 

Source: my Greek Tragedy professor. And if you want to argue that point, you can take it up with him. He’s an ornery old German man who looked at me and told me I needed to do better on my tests in front of the entire class. I had a 98 overall, and the only grades we got were the tests.

Moving on: Dare I say, we are not special?

The real difference now is that the previously separate communities of fandom are coming together on platforms where systems for separating those branches of fandom do not exist in automatically available formats.

We face new issues because the wonderful world-wide web continues to grow wider and wider. We have more people on the internet than ever before. You interact with more people by participating in online fandom than a person would have 5-10 years ago, let alone before the internet, and that comes with new challenges.

So what, Chaos?

I'm glad you asked! On LiveJournal, you could join Communities. You can envision them as a Discord server centered around a specific ship or character. You could be automatically entered into a group of like-minded people, and never really have to interact with people who shipped Character A with Character B, if you wanted.

Another form of fanfic from the pre-internet through the early internet years of fandom days were Zines (In depth "what's that?" from Purdue University). In fandom, zines were edited, curated fanworks. They were numerous. Some were public, some were private. Some Zine editors stood up to Lucasfilm. Regardless, there was content moderation, whether by community members or by corporations themselves. We'll come back to this.

Does that mean I would never have had to interact with those evil A/B shippers when I ship B/C?

Hahahahahhahaha.

No. It doesn't. You still encountered people who disagreed with you. 

And there were slurs and threats involved. It could get real ugly.

Yeah. Be thankful we have good community guideline things on Tumblr, and a reporting process on AO3. I don't think anyone is going to try to hack your computer to get your IP address and dox you for shipping the "wrong" characters (and good grief: if you care that much or truly think that is an appropriate action, please stay far, far away from me).

You looked for the community where you fit best, and that's where you started following, and finding, and interacting. It's not all that different to what you can do here once you curate your individual experience.

Chaos, why does any of this matter? Why aren't you talking about current events?

Well, in the grand scheme of things, does anything matter?

Yes, newly-nihilistic Editorial Chaos. It really does matter.

It matters because it's our history. It's how we got here. Be grateful. As for current events, I’m not really here to give you an in-depth analysis of those, as there are other posts which do that. 

I’m here to talk about the underlying issue. To do that, we need some background. I promise you need all of this context for my proposal at the end. Feel free to skip what you already know, but please take this opportunity to learn something new today!

Why did Archive of Our Own come into being?

For my sources on this, I direct you to the original livejournal post which started it all (thank you @/astolat! You can find her on tumblr and AO3. She’s responsible for so many great things and I thank her for all of them) and the more in-depth Fanlore page on the original proposal for AO3, where you can find links to relevant issues surrounding the proposal’s creation and the result of the proposal. See? Not a nihilist, Chaos. I'm helping. Like I'm "supposed to." Ugh.

The long and short of this is that internet fanfiction communities were facing censorship from the hosting sites. LiveJournal and Fanfiction.net were getting worried about the legality and perceived morality of different kinds of fanfiction, and a new site was being created specifically to profit off of fanfiction. 

For the sake of this discussion, we are going to use the word "curation". LJ, FF.net, and others were intentionally curating the kind of content they would allow and would allow users to see and interact with, partly out of fear of lawsuits, and partly out of a desire to police morality. The cleaning processes they used to get rid of things they did not like were referred to as "purges."

In the purges, many sexually explicit fics were lost. We aren’t talking about something the average 2020s romantasy reader (that’s you, ACOTAR fan!) would necessarily shy away from. We’re largely talking about a level of explicit nature that mirrors the general content of ACOTAR. There were of course fics that were less explicit, and fics that were considerably more explicit. By my understanding, the bulk were things we now see in published work.

Many fics with LGBT natures were lost, because the crackdown on “morality” I mentioned? Yeah. That had a lot to do with LGBT issues. Others have written a lot more extensively and a lot more eloquently than I can on this subject, so I am going to leave it at that. Just know it was a very large issue, and if you want more on this feel free to do some research of your own!

So the problems were numerous. The solution was created. Now we have Archive of Our Own (AO3). (Am I saying that AO3 is perfect? No. That, like most things, is a whole other post.)

AO3 is an archive. It is a hosting site, but it went about it differently than fanfiction.net or livejournal, or most of the niche, fandom-specific sites. Very few of those actually exist anymore, but they were cool.

As an archive, AO3's role was to be a place where the fics that could not be on the other sites because of curation would go to be. Notable fics that were posted in the early days of Archive of Our Own were fics with incest (wincest started here! And don’t tell me AO3 didn’t want it because, well, the creators were the ones writing it, and yes, I have sources for that), brutal violence, and explicit sexual content, among other, much more SFW G-rated type fics. 

They all had a home on AO3, because AO3 was designed primarily for authors (see sources linked above for more). It is notably not a social media, because it is intended to store works (regardless of their content*) and not share them. (*This is mostly true. There have been some problems because of this, often in the realm of Real Person Fics, or RPF. Again, it's a whole other post, but bears repeating.)

Chaos, what on earth does that have to do with fandom [Character/Ship] Week(s)?

I'm overjoyed that you would ask me such a question! It has everything to do with it.

Since the internet has taken over as the primary fandom connector, we have seen a democratization of fandom. We no longer have Zine editors telling us what we can and cannot write. We are protected by AO3's careful non-profit model, ensuring that no one is profiting off of characters owned by other people or franchises.

It has been said that "every rule and regulation you work to enforce has been written in the blood of others." 

That is... overly dramatic.

You do remember we’re called ‘Chaos’ here, right?

Fair. Why do you insist on being so damn cheerful when you’re talking about rules written in blood?

I’m trying to keep it light, Editorial Chaos. Please just… shut up.

Fine.

AO3 exists largely because certain types of fanfiction were being excluded from fandom. People were upset at the purges. People were upset that they weren't being allowed to write work with characters being in LGBT relationships. People were upset that an LGBT fic automatically got a more severe rating than its heterosexual counterpart, just on the basis of containing LGBT content. The little purges were numerous, and there were multiple large purges as platforms decided what they would be willing to accept and what they would leave by the wayside.

Archive of Our Own changed the model. Instead of platforms moderating what they would allow, AO3 implemented a tagging system which would allow readers looking for works in the archive to filter out content they did not want, or to filter for content they did want. Instead of the filter being run by the governing body, the archive was just there. It was up to the user to decide what they would read. The user moderated for their individual preferences, instead of the Organization for Transformative Works (OTW is the governing body of AO3) deciding for an entire, diverse body of fans what they would be allowed to consume. OTW’s creators saw the blood spilled. And they used it to write new rules.

This became the standard of fandom because of its equal opportunity approach. Fandoms have the ability to self-govern, and one of the easiest and safest ways to do that is through comprehensive tagging systems.

Tumblr has an incredible tagging system. Could it be better? Sure. But you can block tags for things you don't like. You, the individual. You, the solitary person, with your own lens through which you view the world. You, who are different to anybody who has ever been, and different from anyone who will be, because no one will ever share your exact set of thoughts, words, feelings, and actions. YOU.

Essentials so far:

Hosting sites began for all fanfiction

A few hosting sites became Curated sites

Curated sites led to the creation of One Hosting Site to Rule Them All (no matter what issues that may create) AO3

The one hosting site is now the primary archive for thousands of fandoms, open to all kinds of work as long as you tag correctly

The democratization of fandom gives space for all works, and allows users to consume what they will (and avoid what they wish) via comprehensive tagging systems

So... where does that leave us?

ACOTAR is a relatively new fandom. It's boomed in the last couple of years, and that's fine. That's good. It is driven on platforms like TikTok and tumblr.

Do not tell me that the TikTok fans are worse. The grass is not burning any more on the other side of the fence than it is under your feet. And yes, the grass under your feet is burning. Look around! And this is the hellsite, after all.

Tumblr and TikTok, paired with the insane (and awesome!) number of ACOTAR fans, largely keep us apart from previously existing general fandom spaces due to algorithms driving engagement. Many ACOTAR fans are new to fandom culture. I don’t think this is a bad thing. I do think it can create problems where fans with previous fandom experience who are a part of the ACOTAR fandom will clash with fans who are new to fandom.

I think this knowledge gives us a choice. There are two types of hosting sites. Why not create two types of events? This is already happening. If we can label events as one of the two types, then it will help people find their spaces where they are the most comfortable. If we create events that are labeled as either "curated" (large amounts of moderation, limits on ships allowed, etc) or "hosted" (anything goes), then we can ensure that everybody is happy. 

She means that, by the way. She works for "peace". Ha. Imagine that. But seriously, girl…

Okay, well…

My Perspective (And Why Do People Care So Much?)

Am I truly happy with this? No.

It actually really pisses her off, actually. She won’t admit it, but I will.

I think, Editorial Chaos, that fandom benefits from Archive of Our Own type approaches, where anything goes, but you must tag comprehensively. It encourages appropriate reporting of triggering material and content not safe for minors/work. This goes for fandom spaces, but most especially fandom events, which should accept things which under the umbrella of the theme they are celebrating, regardless of the perceived morality of their content.

Maybe we can't expect all spaces to be ready for anything. We don't expect that of all people. However, saying that you are hosting an event which is open to all fans that prevents people from considering a character in a new view, such as considering a morally gray character, who is presented in canon as a protagonist, as an antagonist during their character week, or issuing guidelines which would limit an author's interpretation of characters that fit within an archetype, is not truly hosting a fandom-wide event. That's a curated event. And calling it "curated" here is not a judgment.

She seriously means that, too. In case you actually care. The Suriel knows I don’t.

An event that does not allow for truly transformative fanworks within the bounds of its established purpose (a specific ship for a ship week, or including a certain character for a character week) is not an event that is open. It is curated.

An event that is curated is not open to all fans, and should not be presented as such. I’m not going to make a judgment call and say that it is wrong. Get together with your friends and host your own week. I don’t care if you do that! I encourage it! Call it a fic trade, call it something else, but it isn’t an “open” event. It is curated.

However, I want you to keep something in mind as you curate public-facing events: Stop policing for morality. That’s going to end very poorly for us. Keep in mind that the things you are reading in ACOTAR now would have been, and are, in some places, being pulled from library shelves (if they’re getting published at all!) because of the same kinds of arguments you are making about morality. 

If you truly want more ACOTAR books, consider that, were your thoughts and opinions transposed to the real-life debate about book censorship (which isn’t really different from curation/moderation except that its issued by a corporation or government, which is an added level of intensity) by people who thought explicit sexual content didn’t belong in published books, you wouldn’t have ACOTAR at all.

An event presented as open to all fans when it is not actually open to all fans is in fact censorship, defined in the New Oxford American Dictionary (accessed via Apple) as “the suppression or prohibition of any parts of books, films, news, etc. that are considered obscene, politically unacceptable, or a threat to security.” 

Despite that, if this move to identifying events as either “open” or “curated” is what we need to get through this, then so be it. So be it. I'll be disappointed, and I'll be frustrated. And, so help me, I'll be angry. I will. I will not lie to you about that, but I will deal with it.

I love the “don’t like, don’t read” aspect of fandom. I like extensive, comprehensive, and sometimes-even-silly tagging. I like exploring things that I may not like, and then deciding “this just isn’t for me.” I like blocking tags!

More than that, though? I am tired of the fighting. I am so damn tired of it, guys. We have to do better. We seriously do. 

(Under 18s, and frankly, even 18-25s like myself, I’m just going to say one thing to directly to you, in case you are here. If you only take one point away from this post: Please learn to be nice to each other when you disagree. You, me, and our generations are notoriously bad at that. These people can be some of your best friends. Read that post I linked at the top for more details on good old human decency on public facing platforms. Complain to each other in DMs here or on Discord. Go outside and scream when you are frustrated, if you must. You’ll thank yourself one day, I promise.)

We are not treating each other with basic human dignity. We are not treating people like people. We also are not doing a good job of simply moving away from things that upset us at an individual level. We cannot expect to only see things we agree with. What we can do is acknowledge that our emotions are our responsibility. 

Community spaces do not need to be moderated for your enjoyment. If you are a part of a community space intended to be enjoyed with moderation like Reddit or some Facebook groups, great! If you are a part of a large group of people on a public platform like Tumblr, or in some type of semi-open community space like an open Facebook group or Discord server with a ton of people and expect to only see things you agree with or never encounter criticism, tough. 

Learn to accept criticisms of ideas you agree with. You don’t have to accept the criticism itself. You do have to accept that people are going to have thoughts you may not agree with, and that you will see them from time to time no matter how well you think you have blocked and closed off your experience to fit your tastes. (There is a big difference between appropriate criticism in the general environment and direct vitriolic hatred, which I decried in the post you should have read before starting. Which is why Editorial Chaos insisted you started there, to be clear.)

It’s exhausting to pretend like things are fine.

The grass is burning, remember? We’re all on this hellsite together.

So take from this post what you will. Consider my proposal for two kinds of fandom events. Ask questions, if you wish. Send me your thoughts. 

Just remember I’ll be the one answering cruel ones. Keep it together, folks. I was raised well, but I’ve got Nesta’s tongue and years of therapy to prove it.

I wish you all well. I truly do. I hope you learned something, or were able to consider something in a new light. I hope you find it helpful. 

All my best,

Chaos

Hey. Can I go, too?

Yeah, dude. Go to bed. It’s like… 3 AM and you’ve been obsessively working on this for days. How many research papers on censorship in fan controlled spaces did you-

Shut up, Chaos. At least we’re done now. Finally. Peace, y’all. <3 (not really), Editorial Chaos

xxx

One final note from my last editing round of this piece: I truly did spend days researching these topics, and reading thoughts from various points of view here on tumblr. I hope having the back and forth from "Chaos" to "Editorial Chaos" was entertaining rather than distracting. I hope some part of you enjoyed reading this. I truly do.

The first draft of this post was written not long after the Elaingate hashtag was created. It was a lot shorter. It was a lot meaner. It was a lot more discombobulated. I hope, despite the length and the occasional rudeness, that you have been able to learn something new, or consider a new perspective.

This subject matters a lot to me. In my state, we are fighting book bans left and right, and have been for a few years now. I recognize a lot of the statements I have seen here on tumblr from that very fight, and it makes it incredibly personal to me.

Thank you for understanding that for me, and many others around the globe who face much stricter regulations than those proposed in my district, this is more than a debate about morality and censorship in fanfiction. It is about addressing a pattern of thought that has real world consequences in our neighborhoods.

Thank you for reading this. Thank you for your kindness. I look forward to hearing your thoughts.

And in case anyone is curious? Editorial Chaos is the bitch who edits all my fanfictions. Yes, really. She has her own brain (/kidding!). And she's so mean to me. All the time. (/true.)

[strawberry-jackalope]

engaged with a tiktok video that had a slideshow of sexist quotes, two of which were not real (ie, said by characters but not real sentiments of the author or actor) and now ive got what I can only hope is a teenager telling me "serious or not some things shouldn't be said" which like.....

Do you only do exactly what people have told you and have no original thought? Do you think thought crime is real? Is to engage with conflict to be defined and marked for sin, straight to hell do not pass go do not collect $200???

[blackjackkent]

OK, trying to make a beeline for the Counting House to do that quest first although the urge to wander around and trigger every other quest in the area is very strong.

Due southwest. Do not pass Go. Do not collect 200 gold.

A lot of interesting stuff spotted along the way; I'm going to have to come back and walk through this area more systematically soon:

An execution notice for Florrick, who has been deemed "guilty of treacherous and seditious activity against the people of Baldur's Gate" and is to be executed in five days. I'm assuming that, like all the other quests in this game, there isn't ACTUALLY a timer on this until we actively pursue it, so hopefully she'll still be rescuable by the time we get back to Wyrm's Rock.

There's apparently a Hag Victims Support Group at someplace called "Barren's Coop".

A LOT of Steel Watch and Flaming Fist, all of them actively engaged in making the locals miserable on Gortash's behalf; definitely some local trouble we're going to want to follow up on once we've got Minsc.

Cute banter between Shadowheart and Karlach. Karlach: "I wouldn't mind doing a little shopping in the city." Shadowheart: "Same. I think I may have overdone it with the black and purple for, oh, my entire life? Your look serves you well, though." Karlach: "I'm ten years behind; don't want the youths to think I'm not, you know, up with the times." LOL. We'll def do some more clothes/equipment shopping once we're done with our current High Priority Missions.

Shadowheart's wound also went off again for no immediately obvious reason.

More brainquakes.

A very upset vegetable merchant whose stall had been overturned, who had monk-specific dialogue when Hector spoke to him (because I thought he might be a trader). "Do you know how hard it was to get those cabbages into-- wait. The stoic stance, calming presence... You're one of those monastic types! Stay clear of my cabbages! Your sort have done enough damage as it is!" Hector was thoroughly baffled by this.

Quite a number of beggars and dead bodies; the Batman vigilante instinct that Hector was starting to pick up seeing all the suffering out in Rivington is starting to rear its head again.

Made it!

Whew. That was emotionally draining. XD Ignoring sidequests, even temporarily, is a CHALLENGE.

[enbygunderson]

"I can't be held accountable for my actions, I'm diagnosed with _____" okay, then you belong in a high security psych ward. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. If you are dangerous to other people and you can't control your own impulses, then you don't get to coexist with people that aren't dangerous and are capable of engaging in the bare minimum of social contracts. If you can't/won't play by the same rules as everyone else, then bye.

[typewriter83]

Question!

What are your thoughts about oldtimerbuckley and callmeshepard stories. They're so great 🤯 i just wish they could join either Twitter or here

Hey there sweetie! How have we never talked about them? Both writers are very good, and I do wish that more of the writers were on social media. It’s hard though, especially with so much negativity surrounding the ship, I don’t blame writers (and readers) for not engaging on social media.

Joellie discussion below cut

Starting with CallMeShepard - he holds a special place in my heart as “Just Go With It” was the first Joellie story I read. I fell in love with the idea of Joel and Ellie falling in love, which is what happened in that story. The fake dating storyline, the forced proximity, one hotel room and one bed trope - hook, line and sinker.

I haven’t followed along as much with “100 Steps to You.” I understand how hard it can be to balance writing with life, and I know it’s been a struggle for him to update. Maybe someday he’ll be able to post the whole story and I’ll read it.

Oldtimerbuckley - listen, if you’re reading Joellie stories but haven’t read Buckley’s stories, come sit by Mama Bear, come here. Run, do not walk, don’t pass go, do not collect $200. Run your ass over to ao3 and start with “What kind of man loves like this” and you will understand why we love Buckley. Every chapter is good, but chapters 5 and 6 will melt your damned brain. Joel and Ellie fooling around in a church (Ellie is kind of mean, but we’ll allow it) and then chapter 6 is a Joellie rewrite of the Part 2 porch scene… with smut. (This might be my bedtime story tonight… just saying)

It appears that the follow up story - “I will follow you into the dark” - is on hiatus, but she’s writing (and soon wrapping up) another story - “don’t be a stranger” - and it’s another brain melter. Joel and Ellie fooling around in Tommy and Maria’s bathroom… I’m just saying. Run, don’t walk.

🫶🏻

[deslizada]

I hate terfs as much as the next transsexual but I'm genuinely confused about how vanilla radical feminism got such a bad name?? the basic premise is that patriarchy is embedded in society and society has to be restructured to eliminate it, with heavy focus on intersectionality and anticapitalism, idk how else you're going to do feminism. like I get that the association with terfs probably poisoned the well for a lot of people but if you read any actual radfem writing there are plenty of trans inclusive radfems. please engage with this post because I'm so confused and I want to understand what brand of feminism people think is the Most Unproblematic here. and I mean actual feminist theories not "I'm a woman so every choice I make is a feminist choice", that's not a feminist theory, go straight to jail do not pass go do not collect $200

[talesfromsiteredacted]

Helpful Hints For New Hires: Or... The Bright List Exists For A Reason, Folks!

It has come to the attention of Site Command that there is some confusion among the new hires. The following are tips to help you avoid Keter Duty, Bright Duty, or worse... death.

The Foundation motto is not "Fuck War, Famine, Pestilence, and Death; we have 076-2, 106, 049, and 682!" It is "Secure, Contain, Protect." As in, to Secure continued employment and survival, Contain your stupidity and help Protect your fellow workers.

Anyone caught passing out "cups of orgasm" from 294 will be demoted to D-Class and used in 682 testing. It's on the Bright List for a reason.

Do not get between Clef, his cowboy hat, his ukulele collection, or his shotguns. Ask any surviving Chaos Insurgency agent who made this mistake.

If it's on the Bright List, don't. If it seems like it should be on the Bright List, don't.

Dr. Glass is not made of silica. That's the Sentient Prism you're thinking of.

It is ill advised to try to bribe Site Command for better assignments. That being said, the wheels of the Foundation turn on rivers of coffee. It's not a bribe if it's an essential resource.

Dr. Iceberg is starting to resent the number of people asking him to "make me a snow cone". He has no known cryomancy abilities. Try 343.

Dr. Rights and Dr. Bright are not to be left unsupervised during their shifts. Especially if together. No, Dr. Clef does not count.

No one is to lick the anomalies unless instructed to.

No one is to allow the anomalies to lick them.

There is no SCP Inquisition. There never was an SCP Inquisition. That's the Ethics Committee you're thinking of, and you do not want to deal with them.

Any "Site Spirit Day" ideas must be run by Site Command. Dr. Bright is not allowed to suggest "Spirit Day" ideas.

Whomever is roasting marshmallows on the Man on Fire, either share the s'mores or cut it out.

Playing "Patticake" with 049 is a death sentence. Stop telling D-Class that he likes it.

Trying to hug 076-2 is also a death sentence. What is wrong with you?

Hugging 999 is not only perfectly safe, it's encouraged. He loves hugs, and everybody loves the cute little goey blob of joy.

Also, hugging 073 is allowed, provided he's willing. And no one involved is wearing organic fabric.

Hugging 682 is right out. Seriously, D-9847, are you that eager to die?

No. More. 294. Plushie. Shenanigans! The last time someone moved either the Scorpion or Sub-Zero plushies the damn thing sulked for three days.

Site and Foundation Protocols exist for damn good reasons. Consider that before breaking them.

There is no need to stampede the Site Cafeteria on Pizza Day. There's more than enough to go around.

Despite his name and mechanical demeanor, Dr. Gears is in no way infected by the Clockwork Virus, nor a member of the Church of the Broken God. Nor is he an android. Or a Terminator. And Dr. Bright and Dr. Clef are to stop spreading these rumors.

"Talk like a Jedi Day" is not a thing. Nor will it ever be. And the next person who mentions "Talk Like a Pirate Day" will be used for MTF high caliber target practice.

Do not encourage Dr. Bright. It never ends well.

Do not encourage Dr. Clef in his prank war with Dr. Bright.

Do not let Dr. Clef within 200 meters of Dr. Bright without at least 2 MTF teams, a Site Commander, two straight jackets, a fire hose ready to go, and a very large net. Yes, you need all that. Best not to ask why.

When 076-2 or 682 breach, RUN. DO NOT ENGAGE THEM. Let MTF handle it.

Do not trust 035. Just... don't.

If you insist on bringing baked goods into the office, bring enough to share.

If it seems dangerous, it's extremely dangerous. If it seems safe, it's probably not. Item Classes are not power levels, just how hard it is to keep the item here. Remember and act accordingly.

[queenkoalas-corner-of-hell]

Well the Tobirama characterization poll for Useful (working title) is doing better than I thought, as far as like interacting goes. Ok, so while that does its thing lets talk “Tobirama's Dowry Issue”, I'm once again asking to pick the masses' collective brain to like fact check me and spot the issues I'm not seeing anymore.

Here’s the problem/solutions I'm settling on (well the multiple problems in one mathematical issue, I asked historical reddit but no dice)… it's lengthy, but maybe it'll help someone not writing Tobirama/Madara bc this stuff was a task to figure out.

Yuinou. Like a bride price + food and drink + engagement party but where the family taking whichever spouse is paying for the other family’s investment in the kid. Its almost like a retirement fund for the family whose kid left bc that kid won’t be there to help their elderly parents as much. From what I can tell, it was determined based on how much the that investment was. Now it seems like it's a salary's worth multiplied by the region's exception. (n x salary = yuinou). SO I need Madara's and Tobirama's wages. Easy peasy right? Right?

Ninja Salary. How much everyone makes in Naruto is actually impossible to figure out. Because of the many factors that go into how the economy works in Naruto, you also have the pseudo benefit to have it connected to real world currency. The whole 1 ryo -> 10 yen all well and good but if you know even a passing whiff of an idea of Japan's economic history you begin to see the issues (rant for another day). The only solid thing we have in prices is how pricey the reward for a completed mission is. (Which actually sucks as far as info goes because it implies either an ungodly inflation rate, taxation to the high heavens, and/or ninja are responsible for their own retirement pension.) If we use Itachi's numbers for missions completed that are weighted toward the middle-higher scale and his freakishly well documented amount of time he took to do said missions, dump his D into A we have about 3,300,00 ryo a year/275k a month for a well to do ninja. But what about the warring period?

Wages for our old timey boys. Our best real world example is samurai were paid a nebulous annual 200 koku by their daimyo. If we pretend that the ryo was worth a koku as intended, without the drama of Japan's banking, then he should only be making 16 ryo a month. OBVIOUSLY that's not going to be it in modern standards because the Senju and Uchiha are well off enough to feud. You can't feed and clothe an army on 160 yen a month unless inflation actually hit the Naruto world like a freight train. (Honestly, possible, those wars had to be doing something). So the Ryo had to have lost value before Kishimoto decided the 1 ryo = 10 yen thing or whatever Narutoverse's equivalent of a koku was is vastly different. But if we take the actual worth of a koku in modern terms we can guess the Naruto ryo's worth. To clarify 1 koku should be enough rice to feed a man a year, about 150 kg/330 lbs. If 1 kg of rice is 463 yen then 1 koku would be 69,450 yen aka 6,945 ryo. Make that 200 koku and you get 1,389,000 "ryo" a year, 115,750 a month. It may not be 3m. But! What we get from that is real world historical buying power... which I can use to do some typical writer BS. If a clan of 200 had an active 50 ninja, consumed 200 koku minimum then the income of the clan as a whole would be around 66,561,000 ryo a year from ninja alone. Not counting purchasing metals or cloth or livestock that can be refined by the non shinobi or already processed things and luxuries like spices and medicines. The civilians would make a generous 7k annually (some likely not making anything because they're children and some being too old to work) so all together they'd add 1,225,000 ryo which again would likely go towards food and clothing costs but it would lessen the burden on the shinobi being bread winners (even though they are), it'd keep a certain level of luxury to the main clan's living conditions.

All these factors considered it'd make 200k ryo a month for an heir, maybe 250k for a leader. (2-2.5 million yen (14,880-18,600 USD or 13,496-16,870 EUR as far as conversion goes today)) So now we got (n x 200k = yuinou), what about this region number? Well, I can can be completely arbitrary with this since the only examples I have are modern. 3 or 4 wouldn't be a strange number, so let's say the low end is 3 x 200k and the extreme high end would be 4 x 250k. Making a yuinou between these clans a whopping 600k ~ 1m "ryo", this number would work for most of us in the Warring Clan corner of Naruto. It's an obscene amount considering 72% of people following the tradition now is half or lower as much. It does work though when you consider how old money both clans are. Madara/Izuna marrying Hashirama or Tobirama. Hashirama/Tobirama marrying Madara or Izuna, heck, it's a good estimate for how much yuinou was paid for Mito.

But then... what is Tobirama's dowry? Yuinou isn't dowry, it's coming from the Uchiha... and there are manuals for appropriate items to take from your parents home to where you're marrying into (I just can't read or find them so second hand sources are my main). Amount though... Basically I'm going to fudge it after looking at the buying power of the clan and Tobirama himself. Then fudge it more to fit the story I'm concocting. Will anyone care? Probably not. But I spent the last two days down this rabbit hole simply because I needed to know what was within Tobirama's monetary means. The driving point of my yaoi slash fic is the man doing everything he can to be useful.

(Also if you found this doing a deep search for Naruto economics or Japan's traditional marriage practices, I am so sorry.)

[inun4ki]

Does he have a favourite murder method when it comes to his style of dance? Like, will he go straight for the kill or will it be a battle of endurance? Is it like Death by A Thousand Cuts, sadism or more, black flash decapitation?

it really depends on the circumstances, but i'd say he's a ' i will nuke you from orbit ' type of guy. up close and personal - there's often too much risk involved, so in that case, he'll go straight for the kill. sometimes it's quick and easy, other times it's flaying flesh and rendering fat. but nothing is as devastating as what he does with hell prism, and honestly, if you get trapped in there, you're totally fucked. it's mainly all illusions in there, but he'll pick just one out of the bunch and that's what'll seal his opponents' fate ( when it came to inunaki village, he chose something simple yet decisive; when i say ' nuke you from orbit ', i mean it ). he is absolutely not the type to show mercy to curses or curse users - he does not pity them - and will stop at nothing to grind them into ashy paste or turn them into meat confetti when engaged.

though he usually makes an attempt to show some dignity and restraint, under the right set of circumstances, all bets are off and he'll kill you if it's the last thing he does. and he'll do it cleanly or horribly, depending on how much you piss him off ( and this can mean anything from inconveniencing him in battle or you killed someone he cares for ). death by a thousand cuts and then he drops a nuke from fake hell. suffer horribly, die horribly, do not pass go or collect $200, exit the reincarnation cycle permanently. it's less out of pure sadism and more overwhelmingly a matter of principle.

so really, he goes for the jugular every time, but may also go out of his way to destroy you. that's the method. all-out fuck you, die style sjdfhsdf although, black flash decapitation sounds fun 👀 but i am not sure he's capable of using it.

[bittersweetblasphemy]

i wouldn't normally make a post like this but I'm getting real fucking tired

if a certain married pastor would stop trying to cheat on his wife with me that would be great 🙃

because you keep making new accounts to DM me about how you're "unsure if you should give in," here are the three options which I have repeatedly presented to you.

A) be faithful to your wife, because you promised her faithfulness when you married her.

B) go through a proper divorce and do whatever the fuck you want as a single consenting adult with other consenting adults.

C) have a serious conversation as adults about your kinks and the possibility of opening your marriage to other sexual partners. (and if she's not open to these things, please refer to options A and B)

you've made it abundantly clear your attempts to contact me aren't actually about your wanting to leave your faith, commiserate in apostasy, a shoulder to cry on for your Catholic guilt, or to discuss theology. you want a satanist who will sext you kinky shit or at least not immediately tell you to fuck off for fetishizing them.

personally, and i am an outlier here, i would be totally fine with it. if you were single or engaging in ethical non-monogamy (as i am), i would be perfectly happy to engage with you in this way. but even if you suddenly came to me and said that was now the case. i would not believe you. do not pass go. do not collect $200.

once and for all: Fuck. Off.