#David spade fanfic

[myveryownfanfiction]

18+ MINORS AND THOSE WITHOUT AGE IN BIO DNI

tags: @illiana-mystery

requested by: @moosieworld request: Hi I really liked your Tommy Boy fic with Richard Hayden! I was wondering if maybe you can do one where the reader works with Richard and they’re both on the road with Tommy. They get to the hotel and realize there’s only two beds so someone (*cough cough* Richard) is gonna have the share the bed with our dear poor reader…thank you so much!!!

warnings: swearing

“Oh thank god.” I muttered as we pulled up to the motel. Tommy offered to go get the rooms for us while Richard and I unloaded the car. “If we spent another minute on the road I swear I would have thrown myself out of the car.” Richard gave me a look, chuckling awkwardly.

“yeah well…” he shrugged. “Sorry for the way we act. We can’t really stand each other.” I nodded.

“Yeah that’s clear as day.” I laughed. Richard smiled softly at me as Tommy came back.

“so there’s a tiny problem but I’m sure we can sort it out.” He said, rocking on his feet. “They only had one room available.” Richard looked like he was going to strangle Tommy.

“hey.” I put a hand on Richard’s shoulder and took a step between them. “It’s alright. We can figure something out. Like I can sleep on the couch or something.” I offered. The two boys nodded and we dragged our luggage up to the room. “Well crap.” The three of us stood just inside the door staring at the room. Two beds. No couch or sofa.

“I can uh sleep on the floor.” Tommy offered. I shook my head.

“no. We’ll never get you back up.” Richard scoffed. “Think next time. I’ll sleep on the floor.” He grimaced as we looked down at our feet. “Or not.”

“I can sleep in the car…” I started. Both boys turned to look at me, matching thunderous looks on their face. It was probably the first time they had ever agreed on something.

“no!” They cried. I held my hands up in surrender.

“alright then.” I sighed. “So what are we going to do?” Richard rubbed the back of his neck.

“you’re going to have to share with me.” He said, voice barely above a whisper. “Tommy takes up the whole bed so it’s the only way this works out.” He blushed as he looked at me. “Alright?” I nodded.

“alright.” I blushed as I headed into the bathroom to change. I could hear Tommy teasing Richard through the door, knowing the moment Richard retaliated by the resounding ow from Tommy.

“shut up dipshit!” Richard hissed, making me frown. “They don’t need to know that and you’re going to keep your mouth shut for the rest of this trip.”

“fine. Fine.” Tommy said. “But if you two need me to leave…OW! Quit it Richard!” I finished changing and walked out.

“bathroom is free.” I said softly, jerking my thumb over my shoulder. Richard hurried off into the bathroom leading Tommy and I alone.

“I’m sorry you had to get dragged into all this.” Tommy finally said. I looked up at him. “Richard and me. Always fighting.” I shrugged.

“meh. Par for the course. It was that way back home too.” I said. Tommy nodded. “I will admit I hoped you two would figure things out but in the end as long as we can save the company…” I shrugged again. Richard emerged from the bathroom and Tommy took his place.

“ready for bed?” Richard asked after a beat. I nodded and climbed beneath the covers. Richard did the same, the two of us facing each other. We stared at each other. “Did you want me to put a pillow between us?” I shook my head.

“we don’t have one to spare.” Richard smirked.

“I could take one of Tommy’s.” He offered. I giggled and shook my head. He nodded and we kept looking at each other.

“Richard…”

“(Y/N)…” we said at the same time. We laughed and Richard motioned for me to continue.

“well I just wanted…” I smiled at him. “To say thank you. For bringing me along and I mean…this…” Richard blushed.

“oh. It’s nothing.” He breathed out. “Nothing.” I ducked my head and Richard reached out to touch my arm. “Hey I just wanted to say thank you for putting up with us. And that I’m sorry.” I smiled at him.

“Tommy already apologized.” I shrugged. “But I appreciate it.” Richard nodded. Tommy came back and turned out the light. “Night.”

“night.” I whispered back. The next morning, I woke up with my face pressed against Richard’s chest and his arm wrapped around me tightly. I quietly extracted myself with hot cheeks, rushing to the bathroom before heading out to get breakfast. When I had come back, Tommy was packing their luggage back up. Richard was leaning against the car looking at a map. “Hey.” I said softly as I put the box of donuts on the hood. Richard looked at me with a blush.

“hey.” He said. “About this morning…” he started, reaching out to touch my arm. He was interrupted by Tommy coming out with the luggage. “We’ll talk later.” He said with a smile. I nodded, smiling back at him.

[acacia-may]

For What It's Worth (Black Clover Fanfic)

A shadow looms over the dining room when the Golden Dawn gathers for the first time after tragedy threatened to destroy them. Even Yuno who has strived to remain emotionally detached feels its bitter sting, but his attempts to push it aside are thwarted as soon as it becomes abundantly clear that a certain flower mage is in desperate need a friend.

OR

Yuno has always considered himself ill-equipped to deal with emotionally charged situations, and, despite Langris' apparent insistence to the contrary, he doubts that he is in any way qualified to act as consoler. He finds, however, that, for Mimosa at least, he is willing to try.

Yuno & Mimosa’s Friendship and Hurt/Comfort. Also, Yuno & Langris’ Friendship and the Golden Dawn as family.

Characters: Yuno (POV Character), Mimosa Vermillion, Langris Vaude, Klaus Lunettes, William Vangeance, and the Golden Dawn (David is mentioned which is important to me)

Relationships: Yuno & Mimosa Friendship, Yuno & Langris Friendship, Yuno & The Golden Dawn Friendship

Genre: Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Golden Dawn as Family, Post-Spade Arc, William Vangeance is a Softie (Change My Mind), and Yuno Can't Feelings But Is Trying His Best.

Warnings: Implied/Referenced Canonical Character Death, Grief, Black Clover Spoilers for the Spade Arc.

Rated: G

Word Count: 2,612

A/N: This fic is the first and only time I ever wrote in Yuno's POV (apologies in advance to all my Yuno enthusiast friends. I hope I've done him justice 😅). I mentioned this fic in an answer to a recent ask and realized I never cross-posted it to Tumblr. After rereading it on AO3, I thought it was deserving of a home here too. I hope you all enjoy it.

Link to Work on AO3. Full Text Below the Cut. Thank you for reading!

With a sigh, Yuno pushed the food around his plate. It looked delicious—far more decadent than anything he had experienced growing up in Hage Village where most meals consisted of only potatoes. Yuno sighed again. That seemed so long ago now, and so much had happened since then leaving Yuno feeling hardened and weary—old, his mind finished for him.

He placed his fork at the side of his plate. He didn’t feel like eating.

Neither did many of his squad mates, it seemed, as the dining table was filled with picked over plates of food. Klaus, who was seated to his right, had barely touched his besides to take a few bites of steamed green beans and Yuno couldn’t help but wonder if that was only to be polite.

The seat to Yuno’s left was vacant as was the seat to Klaus’ right, but place settings had been laid out in front of them anyway. The sight made Yuno’s stomach churn, and the quiet conversations of his squad mates faded as Yuno’s gaze drifted to the many untouched place settings and empty chairs around their table. His chest grew tight, and he swallowed hard.

Klaus gently nudged his elbow as he reached for a knife and gave him a sympathetic smile before returning to his green beans. David’s voice carried from the other end of the table telling a story not nearly as exuberantly as Yuno had heard it before. Directly across from him, Langris pursed his lips together and grabbed for his glass of wine. He met Yuno’s eyes with a slight tilt of his head. Yuno knew he was thinking the same thing. They all were. 

It was the first time the Golden Dawn had shared a meal together since rescuing Captain Vangeance from Spade, and it was palpably quieter than it had been before. Something twisted in Yuno’s chest as he remembered some of the meals they had shared together in a past that was growing more and more distant—the clanging of glasses as Hamon made a toast; the applause as Shiren stepped in to cut generous portions of turkey for everyone; the raucous laughter and friendly conversation. Now there were only hushed tones, the sounds of silverware scraping against fine china, and a somber pall hovering over the dining room.  

Langris coughed drawing Yuno’s attention. His look conveyed more sympathy than any words and asked ‘Are you alright?’ Choosing not to think too deeply about the question, Yuno nodded with a slight shrug of his shoulders. Langris’ face softened, but he gave him a brisk nod before pointedly tilting his head towards Mimosa who was seated on his right. Though she stared intently at her plate, her gaze was glossy as if she wasn’t staring at anything at all. She hadn’t appeared to have eaten anything.

Langris looked back at Yuno then to Mimosa then to Yuno again. Yuno did much the same and they continued their nonverbal back-and-forth until Langris, seemingly exasperated with Yuno’s blank blinking, sighed and met his eyes with a pointed look that screamed ‘she’s your friend.’ Yuno sighed. He supposed he had always been closer to Mimosa than Langris was but that did not mean that Mimosa wasn’t Langris’ friend too. Yuno decided now was not the time to argue about this, however, and conceded that, yes, even though he still wasn’t entirely sure why Mimosa had adopted him as a friend in the first place, she certainly was now and he should probably do something—anything, his mind corrected—to help her. The only problem was, of course, that he had no idea what that ‘something’ or ‘anything’ was.

With a wish and prayer that the words would eventually come to him if he just started talking, Yuno cleared his throat. “Um…Mimosa?” 

It took her more than a few seconds to look up. Something panged in Yuno’s chest at the sight of her usually laughing eyes so dulled by grief.  “Yes?” she asked.

“Um…” Yuno’s mind suddenly went blank as she gave him the slightest most heartbreaking bittersweet smile. It was then that he noticed something glistening in the corners of her eyes. His heart sank. She was blinking back tears. 

Panicking more than he cared to admit, he glanced over at Langris who merely offered him a look that said, ‘Why in the world are you looking at me of all people?’ before he reached for his wine again with a bitter shake of his head. Yuno supposed Langris had a point. As much as Yuno had never considered himself adept with feelings due to his generally blunt and standoffish demeanour, Langris was much the same way and had insisted time and time again that he was cold, callous, and utterly ill-equipped to deal with these kinds of emotionally-charged situations. In other words, Yuno presumed, he was likely feeling just as helpless.

“Um…” Yuno repeated. “Are you…?”—his heartbeat pounded in his ears and something twisted in his stomach—“feeling okay?” The words felt stiff and unnatural as they fell out of his mouth.

Mimosa turned away from him abruptly but nodded. “Just not very hungry…”

Yuno swallowed hard at the pitiful hitch in her voice, and Langris having reached the bottom of his wine glass tilted his head towards Klaus, presumably suggesting that he would be better at handling this than either of them. In his best attempt to do so without appearing like a backwoods bumpkin from Hage or alerting Mimosa who was once again staring at her plate, Yuno gently nudged him with his elbow.

Klaus turned to him in confusion before Yuno tilted his head just slightly in Mimosa’s direction. “Are you alright, Mimosa?” he asked immediately with an ease that both baffled and impressed Yuno and, judging by his expression, Langris as well.  

Mimosa’s cheeks flushed almost as if she was embarrassed. “I’m fine,” she stumbled in an obvious lie. 

“Can I get you anything?” asked Langris who, Yuno presumed must have finally felt compelled to at least try something. 

“Um…maybe some butter, please?”

Dishes and silverware clanged as Langris, Klaus, and Yuno all bumped into each other reaching for the nearby butter dish at the same time. The room grew thick with silence, and Yuno became painfully aware of where all of his companions had suddenly turned their attention. A faint blush filled Langris’ cheeks despite his stern frown, and Klaus flushed as he cleared his throat and adjusted his glasses, which had been left askew in the kerfuffle. Yuno who had managed to reach the butter dish first, simply blinked at his squad mates before turning back to Mimosa and handing her the butter she had requested.

Her mouth had twitched in the corners though her blush had deepened. “I’m sorry, she whispered. “I didn’t want to cause…”

“Well, now that I have everyone’s attention,” said Captain Vangeance clearing his throat and, Yuno presumed, kindly trying to save them any further embarrassment while having no idea he had cut off Mimosa. Everyone turned to their Captain and raised their glasses as he tapped his for a toast. 

“I know this has been an incredibly difficult time for everyone. I don’t have to tell you all how hard it is to look around this table at all of the empty places and to think of all of the people who couldn’t be here with us tonight." As the Captain paused, Yuno’s eyes burned. Across the table from him, Langris stared at his glass and Mimosa’s fingers gripped the butter dish until her knuckles turned white. “Even though they may not eat at this table, they will always be a part of this squad.” Captain Vangeance’s voice hitched, and Yuno could have almost sworn he heard him sniffle, but he couldn’t bring himself to look up from his plate. “And as I look around at all of you here—my comrades and my friends—I am reminded of what an honor and a privilege it is to serve as your captain and I know that the Golden Dawn will endure”—he raised his glass—“To the Golden Dawn.”

“To the Golden Dawn,” repeated Yuno in unison with the rest of the table. As he held his glass to his lips, he noticed Mimosa hurriedly folding her napkin and rising from her seat, quietly excusing herself. Yuno’s stomach dropped as he caught sight of the tears which broke free of her desperate attempts to dry her eyes. He swallowed hard and watched her leave the dining room before he exchanged equally concerned glances with Klaus and Langris. Before either of them could say anything, however, Yuno’s body seemed to move on its own and he stood up from his chair.

Klaus tilted his head and Langris quirked an eyebrow at him, but Yuno somehow managed a reassuring nod that he could only hope conveyed, ‘I’ll go talk to her.’

*-*-*

Yuno found Mimosa sitting alone in the courtyard illuminated only by the light of the moon. Her shoulders were shaking as she buried her head in her hands. Yuno felt that familiar pang in his chest as he realized she was crying.

He stopped in his tracks unsure of what he should do. If he was being honest with himself, he hadn’t thought this far ahead. Leaving the dining room after her had been an impulsive thing—something Asta would do, he thought with a tilt of his head and the slightest twitch in the corners of his mouth—and he hadn’t given the slightest thought as to what he would do or what he would say when he finally caught up to her. What would Asta do if he was here instead, Yuno wondered.

For the next several moments, Yuno contemplated walking up to Mimosa and offering her some motivational pep talk about ‘never giving up’, giving the idea much more consideration than he knew that he should have. Mimosa probably didn’t need reassurance—she probably just needed a friend.

“Oh, Yuno?” she asked as she finally noticed him standing there. She wiped at her eyes, not that it made much of difference. He already knew she had been crying.

“Hey,” he said taking a seat next to her. “You okay?”

Mimosa nodded though her tearstained face and bloodshot eyes said otherwise. “Yeah…um…I just needed some air…”

Yuno blinked at her obvious lie. “Everybody’s worried about you,” he said in his blunt, matter-of-fact way, and Mimosa’s face blushed a beet red.

“I’m sorry,” she said twisting her hands. “I didn’t mean to worry anybody.”

Yuno shrugged. “It’s no problem. We’re your squad.”

Mimosa whimpered, and her shoulders began to shake again.

“Hey, please don’t cry,” he said—the even tone of his voice not at all reflective of his level of concern at seeing her cry again. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m sorry,” she apologized frantically swiping at the tears in her eyes. “I’m sorry. I just can’t stop thinking about—” Her voice hitched as if the words were getting tangled in the back of her throat. Yuno swallowed and nodded. She didn’t need to finish.

“I know,” he said softly. “Me too.”

“It’s all my fault,” cried Mimosa, no longer even trying to stop her tears.

“No, it’s not. It’s Zenon and his generals’ fault for attacking our base.” The words felt as forced and mechanical as they did when he told them to himself over and over, and he knew better than anyone that they were going to do very little to make her feel better.  

“But I wasn’t even here,” Mimosa argued. “If I was, maybe I could’ve saved them.”

“Mimosa…”

“You saw what happened at the end of our battle in Spade,” she cut him off with a forcefulness that almost startled him—it was so unlike her. “All those people—they almost died…”

“And they would have if it wasn’t for you,” Yuno interjected.

Mimosa caught her breath—swiping at the tears cascading down her cheeks, and the words tumbled out of her mouth so quickly Yuno struggled to keep up with them. “But that’s the point isn’t it? If I could save Captain Yami and Gadjah and Nacht and all of those other people, why couldn’t I save Shiren or Hamon or the rest of our squad? They needed me, and I wasn’t there. If I was, I could’ve saved their lives too.”

“You don’t know that…”

“Yes, I do,” she argued curling her hands into fists.

“No, you don’t.” Heat rose in Yuno’s chest. He could hear it infecting his words as he spoke. “If you had been here, they would’ve just killed you too. We all would’ve died if it wasn’t for Captain Vangeance’s magic—back then…back then, there was nothing any of us could do.” As Yuno’s words echoed through the courtyard he wondered if he was speaking more to Mimosa or to himself. She must have been wondering the same thing because she turned to stare at him with kind and sympathetic eyes.

He turned away from her with a sigh. “Listen,” he said. “I know it’s hard not to second guess yourself. You’re an amazing mage, and you have incredible power—but this was not your battle to fight.”

Mimosa huffed and stood up from her seat—a fire and determination in her eyes that Yuno wasn’t used to. “I’m as much a part of the Golden Dawn as you. If my squad was fighting for their lives, I should have been there.”

“If you had died there, nobody you saved in Spade would’ve survived. Nobody, Mimosa,” said Yuno bluntly. His face softened. “And I know that’s not what our fallen comrades would’ve wanted.”

Mimosa sighed and took her seat again. She wiped at her eyes, but her shoulders had stopped shaking. After what felt like an eternity, she finally conceded in a small, quiet voice, “You’re right.”

Yuno felt no satisfaction in having won the argument. He certainly didn’t feel like a winner as he gave her a curt nod, and they sat side-by-side in the courtyard as she quietly cried—Yuno’s own eyes burning all the while with tears held back only by sheer force of will. He wasn’t sure how long they had sat there when he felt her hand brush up against his. He took it—giving it a gentle squeeze as if to remind her that he was still here, for whatever that was worth. When she squeezed his hand back, he wondered if she wanted him to know the same.

The words began to tumble out before he could stop them though they were so quiet he wasn’t sure she could even hear him. “For what it’s worth, I’m glad you weren’t there…” His voice trailed. “I don’t think I could’ve lost you.”

Mimosa sniffled, and Yuno turned to her with wide, concerned eyes. How had he made her cry again?

He was wondering how he could take back what he had said when she wrapped her arms around him and pulled him into a hug. “I don’t think I could’ve lost you, either,” she said as she pressed her chin to his shoulder. 

Yuno’s eyes widened, but before he could even begin to process what was happening, she pulled away from him again. Though her eyes were teary, she smiled at him.

“Thanks, Yuno,” she said before she sniffled and wiped her eyes. 

“Are you ready to go back in?” he asked.

“I’m ready if you are,” she said as she slipped her hand into his.

Yuno sighed with relief and nodded at her before they walked back into the dining room hand-in-hand.

[ace-cf-cups]

Hi! I'm Di (but you can also call me Spades), a twenty-something disaster head over heels for Rumbelle (and its variants), Anyelle and Anyem, as well as Robert Carlyle and Emilie De Ravin, of course.

I make gifs (most often), write fanfics and occasionally make fanvids/edits.

This is the blog I made as a place for all the content and all my love for Rumbelle (also Golden Lace, Woven Lace and Woven Beauty, I ship all four, they are all beautiful), Anyelle, Anyem and other works of Bobby and Em, with a side of other OUAT content, as well as my love for the cult 90s tv show Friends, which has become my comfort show, Chandler Bing and Mondler, my second favorite fictional couple after Rumbelle.

—

I ship most Anyelle/Anyem pairs, especially the following*:

Rushbelle (Nicholas Rush/Belle, my beloved ♥ Rush definitely needs a Belle as most of Bobby's characters do, to be quite honest)

Hamelle? MacBelle? what do we call these two cuties? (Hamish Macbeth/Belle, Hamish is one of the first roles of Bobby's I've seen other than Rumple and holds a dear place in my heart... and would also benefit greatly from having Belle in his life, even though I also ship him with Isobel)

Russelle (David Russell/Belle... also ship him with Hiero, because come on!)

Robelle? Morrelle? (Rob Morrison & Belle)

Bellix / Felle (Felix DeSouza/Belle... I also ship him with Hiero, guilty 😅)

Lachelle (Lachlan MacAldonich/Belle)

Sutherelle (Robert Sutherland/Belle)

Develle (Danny Devine/Belle also yes, ship him with Hiero )

Gazelle (Gary "Gaz" Schofield/Belle)

Wirrelle? Belleric? (Eric Wirral/Belle)

Macelle (Father MacAvoy/Belle)

Frankelle? Keanelle? (Frank Keane/Belle)

Plunkelle (Will Plunkett/Belle)

Renelle? (Renard/Belle...)

Although I've unexpectedly started consuming Bobby's filmography again a couple of days ago, so I feel like I might add a couple of ships in the near future 😁

(* I also ship almost every of the listed characters with Lacey)

—

I am ALWAYS O P E N to prompts for Rumbelle, any of its variants and any of the Anyelle/Anyem ships from this page, as well as Mondler, ficlets/moodboards!

I am ALWAYS O P E N to Rumbelle, any of its variants and any of the aforementioned Anyelle/Anyem ships, as well as Mondler, roleplay in Discord – just hit me up in DMs!

I am ALWAYS O P E N to screaming incoherently about our favorite characters/ships in DMs/Discord at 3 am and at any other godly and ungodly hour 😜

—

My main personal blog is @ace-of-spaders

My AO3: ace-of-spaders

My FFnet: Ace of Spaders (not Rumbelle updated yet)

[the-symphony-of-lydia-brown]

Tag game!!

Tagged by @ofmiceandwomen here

Last song: there is a rock at my house by Brian David Gilbert

Currently watching: everything devolve into chaos uhh, listening to the Magnus Protocol, I guess I don't have any other series going on?

Three ships: Not an avid shipper, but...hmm...

Honestly, pretty much any confirmed ship that seems vaguely in character and also ships my friends like 😂 What may put me off a ship is a too big power imbalance, I guess, or canon going another way.

Ryuususa from the Great Ace Attorney (shovel/spade banter for days. What's not to love.)

Imogen/Laudna (Critical Role, campaign 3)

I am hopelessly behind on CR, but their dynamic was stellar from the very first episode.

Daemags from the Silmarillion? I love fics where they meet after everything is over and only they are left. Mmmm, my favourite flavour of trauma.

My favourite colours: honestly, pretty shades of basically any colour. Gold, silver, dark blue, light violet, light pink(especially the kind going more into red/orange, warm brown, golden yellow, forest green, wine red, various greys (not alone, though, what I love about them is the way they compliment other colours)

First ship: I guess Taran/Eilonwy in the Chronicles of Prydain? Or something else predictable.

Currently consuming: MaedhrosMaglor week fanfic

Last movie seen: Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring

Relationship status: not in one and frankly, not ready for one.

Currently working on: so many things. I put so much energy into completely random projects.

Yay, tagging!

Hope you haven't been tagged already, but @dreamingthroughthenoise, @asianbutnotjapanese, @soothingmoonlight and, of course, anyone who wishes to join!

0 Pa of pressure tho :)

[sometranssoup]

why are people writing Chris Farley x David spade fanfic??? in 2014 too,let the damn man rest

[themoodyestj]

What, she wasnt busy enough with her hideous jewelry line? Idk, crochet? Pottery? Writing a fanfic starring David Spade?

I was reading that description for Season 2 of The Winchesters and I was reminded of the episode, Fan Fiction, where they have spaceships, robots, and ninjas in the second act. Sound familiar? LMAO! Oh, and the big bad, Calliope, also shudders at having to sit through the 2nd act because there are "robots and tentacles in space!" I guess we know where Robbie got his ideas from, an episode of SPN about a play with a second act that's so absurd no one would ever think SPN would go there.

I still can't believe Jensen was willing to stake his name and reputation on that joke of a show.

Well, he had to give his bimbo wife something to do, so........

[joleneruberj]

He stood with his back to me, looking at the painting by Rubens “The Fall of the Damned"

I looked at his silhouette, and goose bumps ran down my spine. I haven't seen him for so long. I literally forgot what he looks like, but only the back of his head recalled everything that I once had time to lose.

He did not sense that there was someone else in the room. Maybe I was a ghost in his eyes. Perhaps he knew that someone was there, but ignored it. His breath echoed in every corner and dug into my soul.

Since the last time I saw him, he had not been so stately, and now his presence filled the room with a gloomy but cozy scent of oak.

I took a step forward, hinting at my presence. The sound of a heel thump filled the empty room.

He turned slowly, and my heart felt like it was torn apart. It was as if I was paralyzed.

He tried to see me at a fairly distant distance, trying to figure out who he should be addressing.

“Sorry, I didn't notice you,” he said, as if he had never met me before.

He took a step forward, and I realized that the meeting had already taken place, and it was already impossible to avoid it.

“I'm Scott,” he said lightly in his voice. - "and you?"

His question stabbed me with a knife. He doesn't remember me. Or maybe he doesn't even know. Like I never knew.

- "(y / n)." - I answered in the same way as when that long ago, to our first acquaintance - “(y / n). Remember me?"

The slight smile faded from his face, with his eyes he looked for a clue on my face

“… I haven't seen you for so long. Sorry, I wouldn't even think it was you. Everything has changed so much.”

“Fortunately or unfortunately, time always takes its toll. And then he took what belongs to him.”

"All in the past." he said with a stern voice, reminiscent of the Scott I remember. “I don’t really want to remember any of this. The past is in the past. Now a new life has come.”

I looked into his blue eyes, filled with longing and fatigue, which a couple of minutes ago were glowing from familiarity with the unknown. Probably I was looking in them for the answer to the question that torments me these years, which I all this time dreamed of asking him looking into his eyes. Well, here he is.

“Are you happy?”

His blue eyes in the darkness seemed to darken even more, he looked down at his shoes and sighed, replied:

“I don’t remember when I was happy. I remember that it was a long time ago, I was different. With a different environment, different thoughts. I was happy with those who mean nothing to me now. I do not remember their faces, voices and names. I'm not happy (y / n). I died once, and now I live the life of a dead man.”

I wanted to hug him. But this was the most difficult decision in my life in recent years.

But As if something pushed me, and I easily hug him.

I closed my eyes, not hoping that I would be reciprocated. But thin fingers gently touched my back, and then the palm completely lay on it. He squeezed me tightly in his arms like never before. His clothes smelled the same as they did long ago. The hair was soft and the touch was so familiar.

Tears came to my eyes. I didn't want this to happen, but I gave vent to my feelings. I wanted to drown in his arms and stay in them forever.

My hands slid down his back, the fabric of his jacket felt softer, and the air around him went cold. Soon the embrace eluded me.

I opened my wet eyes. The room was dark. The open window stirred the curtains.

Getting out of bed, I glanced at my watch. 4:23 am, November 8th.

A photograph of Scott was staring at me from the bedside table. So young and handsome.

“We haven't seen each other for so long,” I whispered.

In the photograph, he glows with life. But unlike Scott, photography won't die. She will live forever.

[clair-void-ance]

Richard Hayden Fluff Alphabet

 Pairing: Richard Hayden x Reader

Word Count: Roughly 3,180 words

Author’s note: Hey! This is definitely something I didn’t expect to write lmao. I haven’t been in a writing mood lately, but after getting into David Spade again I knew I had to throw something together. Good news though! That means that I’m finally motivated to work on my other WIP’s! So expect those requests to be finished soon :)) Your girl threw this together pretty fast ngl, so hopefully it doesn’t suck lmaoo

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

If there is anything that Richard loves to do, it’s activities that leans more on the physical side. As much as he loves academic pursuits, he can get tired of trying to maintain the persona of ‘the bookworm/nerd.’ When it comes to activities he enjoys doing with you, it really just depends on what type of person you are. If it’s physical, his go to activities include fixing up vintage cars, dancing, cycling, painting, and whatever else you enjoy doing. If it’s more mental, then he enjoys laying back, reading, doing crafts, or learning something new with you.

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

If their is one thing that Richard admires about you physically, it’s your hair and eyes. Being a person interested in astrology, Richard knows that the eyes and hair can tell a lot about a person’s personality and self. And your’s show a person with a breathtaking personality. 

And something that he really loves about you is your ability to be accepting, creative, passionate, and unabashedly yourself. You never failed to accept all parts of him, whether they were good or bad. And when you figured out the situation with this hair, you never once faltered on your love and acceptance for him. Which he appreciates more than you know. 

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

Richard has definitely been at some low points in his life. Whether it be with his career, personality, or looks, he's been through it all. So if there's something be knows well, it's definitely a person in dire need of love and support.

When you're feeling down Richard focuses on the main thing you need at the moment. As much as he wants to listen and be supportive, he first has to deal with your body's needs. Having an anxiety attack? Do some breathing exercises, ground yourself, and take a bite of a lemon. Chest pain and irritable stomach from holding in all your negative emotions? Take a second to dance, cry, and release the negative thoughts. Then, when all that is said and done, he'll sit down with you and figure out the best way to solve your problems.

D reams -  How do they picture their future with their s/o?

Being a small town, settle down type, Richard has always seen you two having a small wedding with all your loved ones followed by having a few children. Although he never really planned to find 'the one,' you turned his life around and showed him that he is good and secure enough to finally start living the life he always wanted. And now that he knows you'll love him forever (hair or no hair), he's confident in the quiet life you'll soon live.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or are they rather passive?

As much as he wants to be dominant and feel in control in the relationship, we all know his scrawny ass could never 😔. And we all know he would love to have someone dominate him. That being said, he loves the challenge that comes with both of you fighting for dominance. But he’s more than willing to calm down and allow you to take control more often than not. 

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How is their fighting?

Being the prick he is, especially with his mars in aries, it will definitely take Richard a while to calm down and discuss arguments with your. While fighting, he is vicious and acts like a wounded animal. None of it is really intentional, he just gets too heated too fast and gets caught up in his emotions. That, added to an inability to express his emotions properly at the moment he feels them, makes him a bit difficult in fights. 

That being said, once he calms down and feels the guilt of his actions he immediately comes back to you and spews out an apology. If your fight was especially bad, he’ll end up setting up a nice dinner for both of you and let out a heartfelt apology. He loves you with everything he has in him, but he’s still dealing with processing and expressing a variety of feelings (plus he’s a man lmao).  

G ratitude - How grateful are they they in general? Are they aware of what there s/o is doing for them?

With his string of luck and life choices, Richard is very grateful for all of the good things he has in his life; especially you. He understands first hand how fast life can turn sour, so he doesn’t take a second of his life for granted once he meets you. 

He knows how much effort you’ve put into y’alls relationship and is aware of how much of impact you’ve had on his life and personality. And for everything that you do, he is deeply appreciative. And he tries to return that energy back to you 100% every day you two are together. 

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

After you figured out his secret about his hair, he knew that he could trust you with everything else. The only thing that he keeps to himself really are secrets that deal with surprises for you. Besides that, he shares relatively everything that concerns him.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

In a way, you both change different aspects of each other; while Richard makes you more sarcastic and ambitious, you make Richard more laid back and wholesome. But when you mix, there seems to be a harmonious balance of the perfect personality. 

Furthermore, you help each other work through personal trauma and make sure that the other isn’t falling into a bought of negative emotions. That strengthens your relationship while also making you both better versions of yourself. 

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Being the sarcastic prick and insecure person he is, Richard is definitely someone who gets jealous easily. To him, you could have anyone you wanted; someone with hair, a better build, and definitely with a better personality. And when he sees you with a man that possess all of those things, he tends to get pretty jealous. 

But he never takes that out on you. He knows that you would never cheat on him or avoid communicating your intentions. When a situation like this comes up, he usually takes a moment to contemplate his insecurities, stews in it for while, then brings it up to you. When that’s all said and done though, you both usually curl up and remind each other how much you both love and appreciate each other. 

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like? + 

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Overall, Richard is actually a pretty decent kisser. He moves in just the right ways and knows how to avoid being excessive. Additionally, with the love that he puts behind every kiss, he makes you feel loved and appreciated with every languid motion. 

The first kiss you two shared was after a company party when you took him home to watch a movie. You both got bored of waiting around and doing nothing at the party, so you left to do something more fun together. After sitting on the opposite ends of your couch, you both started to slowly inch closer and closer to each other. By the time you both started cuddling together, he felt as though the time was perfect to lean in and risk it all. 

And when he gripped your chin, pulled you in, and placed a slow kiss to your lips, you both knew that you wanted to turn this official. 

That being said, he still wanted your consent on if things would truly turn official or not. After letting out a whispered confession of love to you, you both thought it wise to discuss your newly developed relationship. 

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? 

Getting married is a definite for Richard. He doesn’t care what kind of wedding it is or when it happens, he just wants everybody to know that you’re his and that he’s yours. 

Not one to be overly dramatic or public about an important moment, Richard proposes to you while you two are on a camping trip together in the mountains. You had both just woken up and began drinking your coffee on a log by one of the lookouts. With the rising sun hitting your eyes an hair in all the right points, he knew that he had to propose; it was the perfect moment. Not even his nerves could prevent him from doing it.

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

With this man’s wit and sarcasm, he never fails to have new and creative nicknames for you. Usually though, your nicknames depend on the type of mood he’s feelilng.

Sarcastic? My sweet turtle dove. Affectionate? Sweetheart. Playful? Sugar/Angel Face.

It just depends :)

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

When in love, Richard can act like a wistful and love-struck romantic. From afar, Richard can be seen sending you longing and affectionate looks. Furthermore, when you two are near each other, people pick up the way he always drifts really close to you and continuously reaches towards your hand.

While he has a tendency to act aloof and uncaring, Richard does make it a priority to tell you how much he loves you (as well as how radiant you look to him) at least twice a day. He never wants you to feel as though he doesn’t think you are anything less than deserving of all the love you can handle. Even if you two fight, he always puts aside his pride and remembers to tell you that he loves you. 

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

When it comes to PDA at the beginning of you two’s relationship, Richard wasn’t too much of a fan. He was still stuck in the mindset that he had a reputation to uphold; he couldn’t be seen being soft and mushy, he had to be suave and respectable. But as you guys’ relationship progresses he begins to appreciate showing you love no matter the situation. 

If you were to ask one of his coworkers on how he’s changed since being with you, they would definitely point out the fact that he has softened up considerably. He doesn’t care too much about his ‘reputation’ as much since he only focuses on showing you affection during the moments where it fits. By the time you two create a well-rounded relationship, he begins to casually brag about you and how you are the most fantastic significant other anyone could meet. It gets a little annoying, but people find it endearing do a certain extent. (it’s still Richard we’re talking about here lmao)

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that's beneficial in a relationship

He understands astrology and a few other personalty based aspects of people, so he acknowledges all of your quirks down to a ‘T.’ He knows your communication style, love language, argument method, preferences, etc. just by a birth date and a few other factors. 

That being said, he also knows what things are particularly difficult to you, which helps when you aren’t able to communicate how you’re feeling on most occasions. (He has yet to learn how to solve his own problems with this quirk though)

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

Once Richard knows that you love and support him unconditionally, he becomes the sappiest, most romantic person you’ve ever met. Although he has his cliché moments, Richard is usually creative with his methods on making you happy or keeping your relationship interesting. Most of which have to do with the office where you two work *wink* *wink*

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

Being a man of high ambition and deep respect, Richard would love to help you reach your goals; no matter how big they seem. Especially if you are the same way with him. 

He knows how much success and respect can mean to a person, so he will do anything to help you achieve the things you want. One aspect that he likes most about you guys’ relationship, is that you both constantly work towards bettering each other. He believes that you were both meant for great things. And if you associate great things with living off-grid and become self-sustainable, then he’ll help you achieve that. 

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice up your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

Richard appreciates a sense of routine in his life and relationship- especially when it comes to his well-being. But this is mainly linked to his underlying trauma from childhood and career. Not that he’ll ever admit this though, he’s got a reputation to maintain.

He’s never really been given the opportunity to feel free enough to be himself and act childish. It was always, ‘act too mature and professional’ or ‘be cold, distant, and ambitious.’ When you came along though, he finally felt secure enough to open up and be himself. Which, of course, led to trying new things in your relationship. He’s down to try anything if it makes you happy; cause when you’re happy, he’s happy. 

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

Deep down, Richard is not the most empathetic person. He’s had to rely on himself for almost his entire life, so being able to read and cater to another person isn’t the easiest for him. Reading social cues on the other hand, is. That being said, his love for you runs deep and he’s willing to just about anything to make you happy. He’ll take notice of the little things you like and the gestures you’ve come to appreciate, and repeats those. 

Additionally, he understands that you aren’t responsible for his healing. He knows that he is responsible for a huge majority of it, so he takes note of your empathetic nature and uses it to heal not only himself, but you as well. 

When that’s all said and done, Richard comes to learn a lot about both of you and shocks all of his associates with how close you two have become over the years. 

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

Richard values your relationship as much as he values air. Which definitely says something. The man doesn’t care that much about anything when it comes down to it (publicly that is), but he does care for you. And his is willing to quit his job, move across the globe, or do anything you wish just so that he can make you happy for even a second.

After he met you, nothing really mattered as much as you guys’ relationship. To him, those things were put on the back burner and wait. As Charles Aznavour sang, “Me, I'll take her laughter and her tears; And make them all my souvenirs; For where she goes I've got to be. The meaning of my life is she.”

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon

Richard has actually always wanted to have a child. Since he never had a father present in his life and repressed his inner child, he has always wanted to prove that he was better than his parents. That being said, he’d love to have a little girl over a son. Mainly because he knows she will bring out the softer side in him.

All in all, he just wants to nurture and care for a child that he knows will grow up to have a stunning personality and life. 

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

At heart, Richard is a man with a deep, passionate, and affectionate nature. He loves being close to you and enjoys laying back and spending some personal time together. He loves all sorts of kisses he receives from you. Whether they be short and sweet or long and languid, he loves them all. 

When it comes to the long and languid ones though, he loves to do them while you’re cuddling together. 

Is it because he knows it’ll lead to something more? Maybe....but he’ll never admit that. 

Plus, sometimes he just like being held so he knows he’s cared for.

Y earning - How do they cope when they're missing their partner?

Let's be honest, Richard can become a bit of a prick when you're not around. Since you both work together, everyone notices the day's where you’re absent; cause his toxic energy goes through the roof. Although he isn't insufferable, he definitely reverts back to his sarcastic and aggressive method of communicating and acting. But he can't really help it; (his mars is in scorpio 🙄 jk jk lmao) he doesn't have someone around to treat him right y'know? When he's alone though, he tends to get a bit melancholic and revert to sitting around and waiting for you. It isn't his proudest moment in life, but he’s trying to get used to the fact that you might not always be there. With that in mind, he copes the best way he knows how: by occupying his mind. Which is usually by working on his cars or cycling.

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind?

Similar to his career and the things he aspires to do in life, you are something that Richard will go great lengths for. Although Richard knows when to quit, committing to a task is something that isn’t unfamiliar to him. He will work night and day to please you and keep you happy. 

Need him to take the day off to help you with a task or take care of you? Done with no hesitation. Need more emotional support because of recent events? He’ll drop everything in seconds. To him, nothing is worth ruining the relationship you two have worked so hard for. 

[ace-of-spaders]

Hi! My name is Di (but you can also call me Spades), she/her, and I'm a twenty-something disaster that, apparently, has a thing for soft and slightly damaged assholes (a.k.a. Alan Shore and Raymond Reddington, my honorary husbands I'm ready to die for) and adorable men with lovely voices and a habit of using their hands a lot when they talk (a.k.a. Michael Sheen and James Spader... also, David Tennant).

Some facts about me:

Favorite fandoms: Harry Potter, Doctor Who, Good Omens, Staged, Prodigal Son, The Blacklist, Boston Legal.

Favorite pairings: Remus Lupin/Nymphadora Tonks, DoctorDonna (platonic), Amy Pond/Rory Williams, Doctor/River Song, Doctor/Master (esp. Twissy, TenSimm and ThirteenSimm), Ineffable Husbands, Brightwell, Marssie (a.k.a. Martin Whitly/Jessica Whitly, and I don't like Dr Capshaw, sorry), Lizzington, Alan Shore/Lori Colson (while the show, regrettably, didn't go for it, I think they would be a fantastic couple, balancing each other out; plus, the tension in the first season was practically palpable), Alan Shore/Liz Keen and whatever's going on between Alan and Denny)

Likes: music (to which I listen a lot), books (even though I don't read them nearly enough these days), meaningful quotes, dogs (esp. corgi), cocoa, communicating through pictures and gifs, making up my own versions of TV shows' endings/plots to fix a mess the writers have made (I have, like, 5 different versions of Prodigal Son based on the 1st season only in my head, and all of them are better than the original because there are no plot holes and all important scenes – like the red dress scene the writers seem to forget – are accounted for).

Things I wish I did more often: making gifs and fanvideos, writing fanfics, roleplaying (or, well, being actually active on my rp blogs).

Things I do a lot: just gush and scream incoherently about my favorite fandoms, pairings and people (see the top of the post ⬆⬆⬆), to be honest

My askbox is always open for any kinds of fandom asks, gif/fanfic/drabble/moodboard/reader insert/preferences requests and just chat in general.

[scraregenrecs]

Rec Roundup – February 2021 #2

Well hello, you!

Alas, February is shrinking in the rearview mirror, and while it left us yearning for another taste of its sweet tang, we must bid adieu to the month of amor, while ushering in … March.

See you for another round of fic recs on the Ides of March! But don’t let David know, we wouldn’t want another nighttime oopsie daisy.

~Side note: We’ll be doing a separate @scseason7 roundup after author reveals on the 6th, so keep an eye out for that.~

Downtime by another_hero, Alexis & Ruth, G, 1198 words

Summary: Alexis and Ruth have a slumber party at a fancy hotel.

Rec [written by doingthemost]: First of all, love the concept of Alexis and Ruth being besties. Second of all, the way their personalities play off of each other here is so much fun. I would love to be invited to this slumber party, and the nice thing about these two is that I think they'd gladly extend an invitation to everyone to join the fun.

falling in love at a coffee shop by @thankstwy, @landofsonlali, and @anniemurphys, Alexis/Twyla, G & T, 2059 words

Summary: Alexis has never been good at getting the timing right. Twyla decides that it's about time that they do.

Rec [written by doingthemost]: Full disclosure, I wrote the first fic in this series – but the other two fics are so wonderful, I couldn't let them go unrecced. I love when fics give Twyla a chance to take charge of her destiny and to step out of the sidelines and into the spotlight in a way that canon never did. And the final fic is a picture-perfect rom-com in all its trope-y glory. 🥺

from words, but not from beauty [The Good Place crossover] by synchronicities, Alexis Rose & Tahani Al-Jamil, G, 2111 words

Summary: Two wine-drunk socialites have a fight.

Rec [written by yourbuttervoicedbeau]: Everyone who has ever talked about Alexis Rose and Tahani Al-Jamil meeting is one thousand percent correct, no matter if they think it they’d be enemies or BFFs or lovers (or enemies-to-bffs-to-lovers). So I was DELIGHTED to see this fic pop up, and it’s charming from start to finish. The name-dropping! The characterisation! I would read a million more words of this, and yet at the same time the amount of words I got is PERFECT.

i can tell that we are gonna be friends by @thankstwy, David & Twyla (background Alexis/Twyla), G, 700 words

Summary: When it's time for the newly-branded Twyla's Café Tropical to reopen, Twyla asks David for a favour. AKA: Help me, David-Wan Kenobi! You're my only hope!

Rec [written by yourbuttervoicedbeau]: I am such a sucker for any fic that explores David and Twyla being friends, and I particularly love this one being set post-canon! Of course Twyla knows the way to David’s heart is by valuing his skills, and of course David wants to try.

I’ve Got This by @missgeevious, Patrick & Alexis, G, 392 words

Summary: Patrick and Alexis get pulled over.

Rec [written by yourbuttervoicedbeau]: This fic packs so many jams into such a small wordcount — I love Patrick and Alexis’ relationship, I love frustrated Patrick, and I love that I can absolutely envisage Alexis’ expression every step of the way through this. This fic is the definition of short and sweet!

I want to show you the shape I'm in by @yourbuttervoicedbeau, Alexis/Stevie, T, 1017 words

Summary: The backing track for 'Money, Money' is already pumping out of the speakers when she pokes her head around the door to see Patrick and Stevie stomping around each other like they have been in every rehearsal, while the smokeshow Alexis assumes is the choreographer takes notes on a little clipboard.

Rec [written by doingthemost]: Patrick and Stevie's dance rehearsal lives rent-free in my mind, and I suspect that I'm not alone. I love how fanfic can not only answer all the little "what if"s that pop into our heads, like "what if Alexis saw one of their rehearsals?" but expand upon it so that the answer becomes greater than what you thought it could be. There's such a natural evolution from amused curiosity to want, and the tone is so light and playful, this could have easily taken place within the canon.

perfect cup of coffee by @samwhambam, Stevie/Twyla, T, 842 words

Summary: Twyla learns that Stevie is very good at making coffee.

Rec [written by doingthemost]: I love reading about the excitement that comes with the start of a new relationship, and this quiet, gentle little fic delivers that in spades. Not only is it such a sweet reflection on their relationship, but it's also such a good character study of these two. The promise that life has to offer the two of them is so evident and heartwarming!

Recognize my role, i fucked up the timing (gonna pay dearly for years full of silence) by @turningtimeinthetardis, Alexis/Ted and Alexis/Twyla, T, 338 words

Summary: She and Alexis have something. Or they're on the verge of having something. Right?

Rec [written by samwhambam]: Short and sweet and full of angst. Just like I like my coffee in the morning. (Truly, give this a read if you want your heart to be broken in 338 words. Hurts so good.)

Swiping Regret by @treepyful, Ray & Ronnie, T, 3197 words

Summary: Ray’s adventures on Bumpkin: the aftermath of five bad dates and one good one.

Rec [written by samwhambam]: It’s a 5 + 1 of Ray DATING!! D-A-T-I-N-G and then going to his bff’s house afterwards to debrief. It’s a perfect fic. It’s the kind of fic that makes you want to go hug your own Ronnie and tell them thank you for also supporting you through your own tinder adventures. Also there’s a hinted relationship between Ray and a townie that has me wanting more.

This Stupid, Wonderful, Boring, Amazing Job by @lilythesilly, Alexis/Twyla, G, 1129 words

Summary: “I once had my own reality tv show, ‘ A Little Bit Alexis’; maybe you’ve seen it? I was also a plant on three seasons of ' The Bachelor Australia .' So I’m, like, super familiar with how confessionals work. Anyway, I came to Dunder Mifflin because I needed a quick temp job since our super shady business manager ran off with all of my family’s money, and it turns out I can literally sell anything to anyone. Even paper.” A cute lil 'The Office' AU.

Rec [written by samwhambam]: Do you love Alexis/Twyla? Do you love the office? If you answered yes to either one of those, you will love this fic. This moment between them perfectly mirrors a Jim and Pam scene and it really makes you root for them. I highly recommend.

Happy reading, friends!

[myveryownfanfiction]

18+ MINORS AND THOSE WITHOUT AGE IN BIO DNI

tags: @illiana-mystery

AN: Happy 60th birthday David spade!

CJ sat with his arm over my shoulders. Cate and Kerry were busy in the kitchen and Rory was sitting upside down in his chair. Jim had fallen asleep. I leaned my head on CJ’s shoulder.

“wanna blow this popsicle stand?” He whispered. I shrugged. “Come on. Let’s go bug Bridget at the mall.” He got up and waited for me before heading out to his van.

”why do we have to go bug her?” I asked, trying to hide my yawn. “Why can’t we just go see a movie or something? It is your birthday after all.” CJ shushed me and gave me a playful dirty look.

“and they all forgot it. So let’s go.” He pouted. I rolled my eyes and got in the car. CJ backed out and headed in the direction of the mall.

“you’re incredibly annoying sometimes you know.” I said, looking over at him. CJ laughed and shrugged.

“yeah but you love me anyway.” He said. I rolled my eyes and looked out the window pointedly. “Don’t you run away from your feelings.” CJ reached over and poked my arm. I bit my lip to try to stop a smile but he caught. “Ah! There it is!”

“yeah yeah yeah.” I waved my hand at him. “I love you.” CJ took my hand and kissed the back of it. “But you’re still fucking annoying.” He shrugged as he looked over at me.

“yeah well you’re no ball of sunshine all the time either sweet cheeks.” He teased. CJ squeezed my hand before kissing it again. “Anyway. Bridget is on her way home by now. As long as Kyle didn’t show up so it’s just us walking around anyway.”

“then why did you say we were going to go bug her?” I asked. CJ shrugged.

“because I’m bored?” He deadpanned. “We needed an excuse to get out of that house.”

“You really are lucky I love you CJ.” I said, getting out of the van as he parked. “Otherwise I’d have stayed there while you went and terrorized the teens.” CJ laughed as he threw his arm over my shoulders. “Now come on. I still need to buy you a birthday present.”

“bit late for that isn’t it?” He joked. “Considering it’s the day of.”

“keep talking like that and you won’t even get the surprise I had planned for you.” I shot back, intertwining our fingers and leading us into the mall.

“ok I’ll shut up now.”

[ierogenvy]

mel @bourgeoix tagged me in the "Tell Me Good Things That Happened This Year" meme thing so here we go ! here r my top 5:

movies i watched

perks of being a wallflower (ive already seen this b4 this year but i also havent watched it since then so. i cried real hard)

rocky horror picture show

just mercy

the wrong missy (im only including this bc i (accurately) guessed the plot and the ending bc its just a bad fanfic/romcom and my dad got angry bc he thought id looked up the movie. like no i just saw what they did there. also i regretably like david spade movies)

hot rod (those of u that pay attention may know that i almost exclusively watch this when im under an influence but its actually really good)

tv shows i watched

dead to me

parks and rec and the good place share a spot bc i watch them on repeat near constantly

criminal minds (i finished it this year and got hatecrimed by reid x jj)

the witcher (technically i started watching it last year w a group of people but then a few weeks later i found out they had finished it w/o me so i watched it later)

i mean. tiger king. i wish i could watch it for the first time again.

songs i listened to

heart of glass (cover) by miley cyrus

4 morant by doja cat (unreleases, on soundcloud/yt only :/)

superbloom by ashton irwin (the whole album. like it dominated by spotify wrapped and it only existed for like a week while they were collecting data)

danke schoen (the first one from the parade in ferris buellers day off)

i cant think of another song bc my brain is stuck on danke schoen now but id just like to give a shoutout to my discover weekly and to kj for consistenly recommending me good music that i like

books i read

i actually managed to read some non-fanfiction books this year so here they are !

brave new world by adolus huxley (fun fact i "read" this with the audiobook and i had to stop bc its ... a lot. like dense made up words. too long, just in general. anyways i only give this a 4/10 but i did finally finish it. so.)

13 minutes by sarah pinborough (ya thriller; im obsessed; 11/10 def reccomend)

the female of the species by mindy mcginnis (another ya "thriller;" beginning and middle way more interesting than end; 6/10, read it if u like being disappointed)

hollow by rhonda parrish (a ya thriller/supernatural mystery; huge rape tw; 5/10, interesting concept but the execution was weird and the end wasnt satisfying)

ive run out of books that ive read. oh dear. i bought the goldfinch at a used bookstore and ive seen the movie so that counts, right? (it doesnt. 10/10 gay as hell)

good things that happened to me

i got a pay raise and position change at work and i dont dread work as much anymore !

i have learned how to make space for myself and not say yes to everything all the time

ive made so many lovely friends here on tumblr ! if u dont think im talking about u i am <3

i got the strawberry milkshake cow pillow pet <3<3

i used my planner for most of the year, i didnt completly abandon it the second my classes were over

thank u mel <3

i am tagging @5sosofficial @elliotjonesss @wrappeditmyslf @1-800-klaushargreeves @soccer-kate-22 @drybranmuffin @lirry @triangleankle and anyone that wants to/hasnt done this yet ! <3

[avengerscompound]

Mixology - Partings

Mixology - A Captain America Fanfic

Series Masterlist Previous //

Buy me a ☕ Character Pairing:  Steve Rogers x Reader

Word Count:  3623

Series Warnings:  Angst, Character death, Breaking up and making up, past trauma, pregnancy, talk of abortion, smut (vaginal sex, fingering, other things)

Synopsis:   Steve Rogers comes into your bar and after a night of flirting you take him home.  When he leaves the next day you never expect to see him again.

A/N:  This fic was written pre-Infinity War.  So while it follows canon for a while, it then veers off wildly at the end.

Partings

You and Steve sit cross-legged on your bed.  You’re wearing a robe and Steve has pulled his boxers back on.  You’re playing crazy eights.  You keep trying to cheat because every time he catches you he starts tickling you.  

“You know earlier, you said that you didn’t think Steve was the kind of guy who would go skinny dipping?”  You ask.  

Steve draws a card from the deck and you scan your hand to see if you can play anything.  The top card is a six of hearts so you play a six of spades.  

“Yes,”  Steve says, playing a jack of spades.  

“Why only think?  How do you not know if Steve would go skinny dipping?”  You ask.

Steve looks at you and mulls over his answer.  “I guess I never got to know that side of me.  When I was young I was sick all the time.  My mom kept a close eye on me.  I never learned to swim, she wouldn’t have allowed that.  Then post serum, I’ve just had to be responsible.  That’s what I am, isn’t it?  Responsible?”

You play a four of spades but tuck a 3 of clubs under it.  

“I saw that!”  Steve cries, pouncing on you.  The cards go flying and his hands dig into your ribs and squirm up under your arms.  You squeal thrashing under him trying to get away.  There is a sudden shift.  He pulls you into him, his mouth meets yours, sucking and biting at your lips.  

His mouth moves down your jaw and you link your fingers around the back of his head.

“You lied to the military or the government or whatever…”

“SHIELD.”  He corrects you before continuing to kiss down along your neck.  He sucks hard on your skin.  You hum.  He’s marking you and normally that would bother you.  It feels so fucking good though, you can’t even make yourself care.

“You lied to SHIELD about being injured so you could hang out in a studio apartment fucking a stranger all day.”  You continue.  “That doesn’t sound too responsible to me.”

“You really want me to go skinny dipping, don’t you?”  He asks.  

You shrug.  “It doesn’t have to be that.  I just think you should do something for Steve or else all you’re going to be is Captain America.  You seemed so adamant that that’s not who I saw when I saw you.  Be a shame to lose Steve.”

He props himself up on his elbows over you.  “I sometimes worry that Steve might be gone already.  Most of my friends just call me Cap.  The only person who knew Steve when that’s all I was is in a nursing home and she doesn’t always remember who I am.”

You stroke your fingers along his jaw. “If that’s true, why did you want me to be so sure I saw Steve and not Cap like your friends?”

Something in him seems to deflate. His eyes are filled with real sadness.  You feel a real sense of dread as he opens his mouth.  “Someone has to see him.”

Your breath catches.  You pull him into you kissing him fiercely.  Trying to undo the pain you just dealt him.  He buries his face into your neck.  “I’m sorry, Steve.”  You say, pleading with him to hear you now.  “I do see you.  I see you, Steve.”

He lies just pressed against you for a moment.  “Thank you.”  He says, pushing himself off you.  He starts pacing around the room looking for his clothing, that have been strewn around the room.  “I should probably get going.”

You get up and walk up behind him, wrapping your arms around his waist from behind.   “Please don’t go.  Not yet.”

He stands there, not doing anything.  Just breathing. You can’t see his face, so you have no idea what’s happening in his head.  You listen to his chest.  His heartbeat.  The sound of his breath being drawn in and released.  Eventually, he turns in your arms and wraps his around you.  “I’m not sure what you want from me anymore.”  

“Nothing.  Just to have a good time. I’m sorry I don’t want it to end like that.”  You plead with him.

He sighs.  “I’ll stay for a bit longer.  I did have some things in mind.”  

You look up at him and trace your index finger over his bottom lip.  “Thank you, Steve.  Are you hungry?”

He nods.  

“Do you want something healthy to make up for the breakfast?”  You ask.

“No.  I want something loaded in carbs.”  He answers.  

You grin.  “I have just the thing.”  

The two of you go into your kitchen and you pull out some eggplants.  You pass them to Steve and ask him to slice them thinly.  As he goes to work you turn on the oven, beat some eggs and pull bread crumbs from your cupboard along with some homemade marinara sauce that Davide’s family had given to you.

“You make marinara from scratch?  I didn’t think people did that these days.”  Steve mused as you take slices of eggplant from him and dip them into the egg wash and breadcrumbs.  

“No, I didn’t.  One of those guys I was working with last night.  The serious one with the ironic mustache.  His family is from Italy.  I guess people still cook from scratch in Italy or something.  They don’t think I take care of myself properly.  So I end up with lots of Italian food.”  You explain.  “No complaints from me though.  It’s awesome.”

“It’s nice that you’ve found people who care for you like that.  Do you think it will keep you here?”  Steve asks.

You shake your head and move the eggplant into the oven to bake. “People only ever superficially care about me.  When it doesn’t take extra thought.  Davide’s family give me pasta sauce because they give everyone pasta sauce. They’d give it to you too if you showed up to their house.  If I really needed help, they wouldn’t be there for me.  When I’m done with DC, I’ll move on.  I was thinking New York next.  That’s where you’re from isn’t it?”

“I think the New York I’m from might be different than today, if you’re angling for a neighborhood recommendation.”  Steve teases.  He comes up behind you while you prepare a glass baking tray with the marinara sauce, wrapping his arms around your waist.  “Maybe you should give people a chance to care about you.  If you keep moving how would anyone get the chance?”

You turn to face him, looking up into his eyes.  “You can talk.  Besides, I grew up giving people a chance.  I have many nice acquaintances, who I enjoy spending time with.  I don’t have close friends.  I never have.  It’s okay.  I don’t let people in very well.”  You lean up and kiss him, just briefly.  “Weren’t we supposed to keep to happy things?”

Steve’s hands slide down to your ass and he lifts you placing you on the kitchen bench.  You start to kiss, taking your time with it.  His hands slip into your robe, pushing it apart.  He lazily explores your body but never moves his mouth from yours.  

The timer on the over buzzes.  “What needs to happen with these?”  He asks pulling the eggplant out.

“They need to be flipped and put back in for 10 minutes.”  You answer.

He complies and returns to you, taking straight up where he left off.  He starts trailing kisses down your throat and over your collarbone.  One hand goes to your breast and he kneads it.  You hum and clutch at his hair.  He pulls you to the edge of the counter and grinds into you.  

The buzzer goes off again, and you push him away from you reluctantly.  Sliding from the counter you go remove the eggplant from the oven.  You layer it in the dish, sauce, eggplant, mozzarella, eggplant sauce, repeat.  On the very top layer, you grate parmesan cheese and you put it back in the oven.  

“That will be about half an hour.”  You say turning to Steve.

“Perfect.”  He says.  He takes you in his arms and turns you to the counter.  He pulls the cord on your robe and slides it down your arms before tossing it into the living room.  His hand runs down your arms moving them so you have your hand on the counter palm down.  He shifts your legs apart and his hand moves between them.  

His fingers glide up and down your folds.  You’re already wet.  You’re ready for him.  You need him.  He drops his boxers and his cock presses against your cunt.  He moves his hips slowly against you.  Using his cock to stroke your pussy.  Each forward thrust pushes the head of dick against your clit.  

He licks a stripe up your back and you whimper, pushing back against him.  You raise your hand but he moves it back to the counter.  

“Please, Steve.”  You whine.

“Not yet.”  He purrs, nibbling at your neck.

You whimper and wriggle your hip against him.  “Steve, I need it.  I need you.”

“You need me?”  He teases.  His arm wraps around your waist and his starts toying with your clit, rolling his fingers over it, flicking it.  You moan and lift your hands again.  “Hands on the counter, sweetheart or I’m going to keep you waiting a very long time.”

Your pulse speeds up and you place your hands back down on the countertop.  

“I want to hear it again.  Tell me you need me.”   He growls.

You swallow hard.  It feels like your heart is beating in your throat.  “Steve.  I need you.  Right here.  Right now.  I need you so badly.  Please.”

With no warning, he pushes his cock into your cunt.  There is no time to adjust, he just starts thrusting into you.  He never goes further than is comfortable, but he is relentless.  Pounding into you.  Your hands slip over the countertop as you are pushed forward with every thrust.  His fingers remained at your clit, circling and pinching at the small bud.  

You started to moan, an orgasm brewing in you.  Your head fell forward resting on your hands and he grabbed you suddenly by the throat, yanking you upright against him.

“This is what you wanted, isn’t it?  What you needed?”  He growls, his mouth so close to your ear you can feel his hot breath tickle your skin.

“Oh god yes.”  You groan as he continues to pound into you.

He pulls out suddenly spinning you to face him and lifts you back onto the counter.  He pulls you to the edge and enters you again.  This time he slows his pace down.  He rolls his hips with each thrust.  

His hands go to your face.  He runs a thumb over your bottom lip before capturing it with his mouth.  You kiss, slowly, languidly but barely let each other up for air.  His hands slide through your hair and down the back of your neck.  Yours cling to him, cradling his head as you kiss.  You might describe this sudden change of pace as making love if there was, in fact, any love involved.  It feels intimate and tender and like he might actually care about you.  Except you know he doesn’t.  Not really.  You’re just two ships in the night.  He will move on, as will you.  As it should be.

He lifts you off the counter, his cock remaining buried deep within you, and he carries you to your bed.  He slips out of you and turns you.  You crawl up onto the mattress and he pounces on you pressing you into the bed.  He guides his cock back inside of you and wraps his arms around your neck, so you’re able to rest your head on them.  He is pressed down on you, but despite the fact he’s quite heavy, it doesn’t feel unpleasant.  In fact, it’s almost comforting like a heavy comforter on a rainy day.

Steve sucks and nibbles at your earlobe as he thrust and rolls his hip against you.

You hum, closing your eyes.  “Mm… Steve, you feel so good.”

“You feel pretty great, yourself.”  He replies.  

This time your orgasm comes on you slowly.  It rolls over you like a wave, encompassing all of you.  Steve comes with you, and the pulse of his cock inside of you heightens your own pleasure.  

Steve slips out and rolls off you, but only enough that his whole weight is no longer on you.  You are still completely wrapped in his body. He pulls you so your head, his pressed against his chest, under his chin.  

“Steve.”  You murmur.

“Mmm?”

“You don’t seem like the one night stand kind of guy.  Why are you doing this?”  You ask.

His lips touch the top of your head.  “You might be right.”  He says.  “That person I told you about, the one who’s still alive?”

“Yeah?”

He sighs and his arms tighten around you.  “She was my girl.  We spent two years building a relationship.  I was slow to make a move and when I did we still didn’t really do anything physical about it.  We were waiting until the war was over.  Then I died.  So she moved on.  Only I wasn’t dead.  Now she’s here and she’s lived her life and I still love her.  It feels strange to move on and it feels strange not to.  This is the compromise I can live with for now.  I find people who see Steve and not Cap and I enjoy the brief time I spend with them.  I don’t do it often.  Just from time to time.”

“Well, that sucks.”  You say.  

He chuckles softly.  “I take it that you are the one night stand kind of person?”

You laugh.  “Yeah. It’s my preference.  This is the weirdest one I’ve ever had though.  Normally they’re in and out pretty quick.”

“I told you why I do it.  Why do you do it?”

You don’t say anything for a moment, just mulling the question over.  “I don’t know why, but the few men I have attempted relationships with have only stuck around until I agreed to have sex with them.  Then they’ve dumped me.  For a long time, I thought maybe I was bad at it.  I have since realized that actually, all they wanted was the sex.  So now I skip over the relationship part and go to the sex.  Saves me heartache.”

“Not every man will treat you like that.”  He says.

You laugh.  “I am a terrible judge of which are the good ones and which are the bad ones.  This is easier.”

The smell of smoke drifts across the room, followed by the wail of the smoke detector.  You both jump up suddenly.

“Shit the eggplant!”  You squark running into the kitchen.  

Steve dashes around the apartment opening windows while you retrieve the ruined eggplant parmigiana from the oven.  The smoke alarm falls silent and Steve comes up behind you peering over your shoulder.  

“Well, I’m not eating that.”  He says and pokes you in the ribs.  

You turn to the cupboard and open it.  “Back up plan.”  You say pulling down two boxes of cereal.

Steve picks up the box of Corn Flakes.  “They used to have this back when I was a kid.”  He says.  “Do they still taste like cardboard?”

“They sure do.”  You laugh placing two bowls on the counter.  

“What about these ones?”  He asks holding up the box of Trix.

“They taste like cardboard that’s going to give you a cavity.”

“Well, I guess I’ll go for the Trix.”  He says pouring the cereal into one of the bowls.  

“Silly rabbit.”  You tease.  The reference seems to be lost on him though, so you quickly move on pouring your own bowl of cereal.  

You both go and sit on the couch and you put your feet into his lap.  

“Tell me a story from when you were a kid.” You say.

“Okay.”  He takes a mouthful of cereal while he thinks of something.  “Once me and my best friend.  His name was Bucky.  We skipped out of school to play hookey.  We managed to sneak in to see a movie.  They caught us.  My mom was called.  She gave our ears such a boxing.  She never told Bucky’s parents though or my dad.  He would have gotten much worse.  So she kept it a secret.”

You sigh.  The thought of having someone to have protected you from your parents is something that both feels good and hurts because you never did.

“Now you,”  Steve says.

“Once when I was at school, there were these guys picking on a little girl.  They had her bailed up against a wall.  I was bigger than her, but still much smaller than them.  I went up and punched one so hard in the face that I knocked two of his teeth out.”  You say.  

Steve laughs.  “You sound like me.   I was always the smallest and getting into fights because big guys like to throw their weight around.”

“The unfortunate consequence of that story is, that the school called my parents.  That night my dad wailed on me.  He ended up throwing a table at me when I tried to get away and it broke my collarbone.”  You say.  You don’t know why you decided to tell him that.  You’ve never told anyone that.  

He looks at you sadly but without pity.  His strokes your cheek with his palm.  “You didn’t have anyone to stand up for you, huh?”

You shake your head.

“Bucky used to stand up for me.  When I got into fights.  Which was all the time.”  Steve says.

“Do you know what happened to him?  Did he have a good life?”  You ask.

Steve shakes his head.  “I selfishly kept him with me when he should have gone home during the war.  He died standing up for me one last time.  I don’t think I’ll ever forgive myself for that.”

“Well don’t we make a miserable pair.”

You both put your bowls down and you shift so you are leaning up against him, your head on his chest.  He skims his fingers up and down your arm in an absentminded way. You yawn and close your eyes.

“I think I might need to take a nap.”  You say.

“Do you want me to leave?”  He asks resting his chin on your head.  

“No.  But you can if you want.  It has to end sometime.”  

Steve gets up and pulls you to your feet.  “Let’s nap.”

You both crawl in bed with each other.  He spoons you, both arms wrapped around your body.  For the second time in less than 24 hours, you fall asleep in his arms.

You wake to him stroking his fingertips down your neck.

“Hey.”  You murmur.

“Hello.”  He replies.  “I should probably get going soon.  I have plans with a friend.”

“That’s okay. I understand.”

His fingers trail down over your breasts and dance over your pussy.  You wriggle back against him and feel his dick begin to harden against your ass.

“I really enjoyed being with you.  I haven’t had a day where I haven’t had to be Captain America for a long time.”  He says.

“You need to be kinder to yourself, Steve.” You whisper.

He laughs.   “And you need to let people be kinder to you.”  His fingers slip between your folds and he circles one over your clit.  “Can I ask something of you?”

“If it’s for anal, that will be a hard pass.  It would take a lot of practice for me to be able to take that.”

Steve bursts out laughing.  “It wasn’t for anal.”  He uses one of his legs to push one of yours forward.  You feel the pressure of his cock pressed against your cunt just before he slides it inside of you.  You gasp, your fingers gripping at his forearm.   “The things we talked about today.  I’d prefer if they didn’t get out.”

“Of course not.  I’m not a monster.”  You reply.  

“Thank you.”  He breathes.  He starts to thrust into you as his fingers roll over your clit and pinch and tweak at your nipples.  He kisses your throat and the back of your neck.

As your orgasm builds, he starts getting a little rougher.  He thrusts hard into you, his hand grips your breast and he bites your shoulder.  Pulling at your flesh with his teeth. You pant and moan as your orgasm crests and when it breaks you cry out, reaching back and gripping hold of Steve’s neck.  

He comes shortly after slipping from you.  He holds you for a moment.  Neither of you saying anything.

“I better get going.”  He says finally.  Kissing your cheek and getting up.  

You watch him dress, pulling your own robe back on.  When he’s fully clothed you walk him to the door.  He leans down and kisses you one last time.  

“Steve, promise me you’ll find someone who sees you.  That you don’t have to be Captain America with.  When you do.  Go skinny dipping with them.  Don’t let them take Steve from you.”  You say.

He touches your cheek and runs his thumb down along your jaw.  “Only if you promise to let yourself be open to someone in the future loving you.”  

He steps out the door and you watch him head to the stairs.  “I see you, Steve Rogers.”  You say.

He turns to you and smiles.  “I see you too, y/n.”

You head back inside and close the door.

// NEXT

[nowitsdarkfic]

meet the blogger/the fic writer

general:

name: Hannah 

nickname(s): nirvhannah, Chris, alisonchains 

hometown: Ventura (southwest of downtown LA, on the way to Santa Barbara)

age: twenty-six

gender: female 

myer-briggs: ENFP

sun sign: Aries 

moon sign: Aquarius 

sexuality: who knows 

religion: agnostic 

appearance:

height: 5′7″

hair: dark brown with blonde and reddish streaks 

eyes: solid brown 

weight: 228 (I’m a big girl)

favorites:

color: purple 

food: too much to choose from—really I’m better off saying what I don’t like

family member: my parents and my grandparents 

actor: Keanu Reeves, Al Pacino, Edward Norton, Benedict Cumberbatch, Johnny Depp (fight me), David Spade, Idris Elba

actress: Brittany Murphy, Sharon Stone, Audrey Hepburn, Uma Thurman, Charlize Theron, Gilda Radnor, Scarlett Johansson

beverage: coffee

country/countries: France, Italy, Japan, New Zealand, Sweden, Denmark, Germany, Georgia, Mongolia, South Korea, Haiti, the Ivory Coast

city/cities: Seattle, Portland, San Francisco, New Orleans, New York City, Santa Fe, Helsinki, Auckland 

book: The Portrait of Dorian Grey, Wuthering Heights, Jane Eyre, Interview with a Vampire, Blindness, the Harry Potter books, the Great Gatsby, the Hobbit

movie: Erin Brockovich, Midnight in Paris, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Pulp Fiction, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, Blazing Saddles, The Goonies

show: Seinfeld, Friends, Sex and the City, Nip/Tuck, House, Sherlock, Doctor Who, The Simpsons, Family Guy, Beavis and Butthead, South Park, Ed Edd n’ Eddy (just Cartoon Network, really), Portlandia

music: (ha) Soundgarden, Nirvana, Chris Cornell, Audioslave, The Beatles, Black Sabbath, The Doors, Metallica, Megadeth, Anthrax, Joey Belladonna, Pearl Jam, Alice in Chains, Mad Season, Stone Temple Pilots, Velvet Revolver, Mother Love Bone, Truly, Screaming Trees, Nine Inch Nails, Hole, Garbage, Rihanna, Avril Lavigne, Demi Lovato, Bob Dylan, David Bowie, Leonard Cohen, Mark Lanegan, Marilyn Manson, Type O Negative, Green Day, Ramones, Dead Kennedys, Pink Floyd, The Smashing Pumpkins, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Jane's Addiction, My Chemical Romance, The Cure, Oasis, Blur, Tool, Korn, Deftones, Faith No More, Mr. Bungle, Bullet for My Valentine, Avenged Sevenfold, In This Moment, Opeth

app: Sketchbook 

scent: my perfume which is legit called “a little sexy”; i’m not sure how to describe it other than “soapy”, like I just took a shower 

holiday: Halloween 

season: springtime 

dog breed: Chinese crested (’cause my best friend was one 🐾🐾)

vs:

strawberry vs blueberry: blueberry (although strawberries are so luscious)

coke vs Pepsi: ehhhh, can’t stand either

grape vs cherry: cherry

day vs night: day

cats vs dogs: both 

Batman vs Superman: Batman

movies vs TV: movies

hockey vs football: hockey

fries vs onion rings: fries

likes: art, earth science, biology, books, cats and dogs, horses, reptiles, grunge, thrash metal, boys, erotica, pin-up style, 70s/dark 80s aesthetic, graffiti art, psychedelia, the Goth subculture, sci-fi, steampunk, things considered “taboo”, baseball, field hockey, tennis, cycling, Formula 1, hiking, the ocean, road trips, pastries, pasta, my mom’s baking, my grandpa’s cooking, trying on new clothes 

10 random facts:

I speak with a stutter (it’s not as bad as it used to be when I was little but I still have it and I’m still kind of insecure about it)

Refer back to my weighing over 200 pounds: I don’t even look it, and it’s kind of a trip to see women weigh less than me who are freaking huge. I’m as big as I am because the other alternative was literally starving to death: I almost became an anorexic when I was 13, and it came to a head when I was 19 and wouldn’t stop losing weight from depression. So as part of my recovery, I reconciled my relationship with food, and I just started eating. I’m trying to get up to 230 and tbh, I wouldn’t mind climbing up to 240.

It’s funny because I feel like such a rebel liking Joey as much as I do. The latest thing is to like fat boys and “dad bods”, and even taking it further and getting like almost morbid about it--when I was writing Have Your Cake I often lurked in the feedism tags on here to grasp the idea of the community; when I visit them now, the latest thing is to be like “this lifestyle is totally gonna kill you but you’re sooo hot so keep it up!”. This almost feels akin to when Audrey Hepburn came on the beauty scene with her thin elegance, the reaction to all of the full figured woman: he’s a slim, lush, gorgeous man who needs a lot more love (”raw beauty if I ever did see it” as Mr. Lang put it).

I’ve always wanted to get inked but I never know what to ink myself with, or where to put it for that matter.

The one time I ever cut my hair, like had it cut short, was 20 years ago in the first grade. The longest it’s ever been was down to the halfway point of my thigh when I was... 15? Right now it’s down around my butt.

Recovering cutter: I started in 2006 after my grandpa passed and then I stopped; did it again after my parents split in 2011, and again after Chris passed; I’ve been clean since August 22, 2017, three months following his death. 

Chris was a fan of my art. It’s true! My little cartoons never would’ve become the entities they are now without him.

My cartoons have been labelled everything from “grunge” to “metal” to (recently) “emo”. I’m actually fine with just any label you throw at them: just don’t call them anime because that’s not technically correct (anime is animation; manga is printed works, and even that’s bit of a stretch)--my writing meanwhile has been simply labelled “unusual”

I’ve always been a fic writer, but I never actually wrote-wrote a fanfic until I was a freshman in high school. I never went online with a fic until 2013 and then I pretty much stopped it for a few years to focus on school and preserving my mental health until earlier this year with Have Your Cake and Eat It.

Fuuuuuuuck I love food. Yeah, when I say you’re better off asking me what I don’t like I mean it. I will eat just about anything (i’m actually surprised I’m not fat tbh). I’m as much a lady of the flesh as I am a lady of intellect.

[myveryownfanfiction]

I hung up the phone and sighed as I ran a hand down my face. Running my grandfather’s auto parts store was one thing but taking his clients was another thing entirely. After leaving Callahan Auto for personal reasons, I never thought I would stay in the car industry. There was a knock on my door and I pulled myself together quickly. 

“Come in!” I called before turning to the papers on my desk. The door opened as I read the name of the company on the sheet of paper my grandfather had sent over. Callahan. My head snapped up and I hoped beyond hope that it would be Big Tom Callahan. My eyes locked with the man walking into my office and I groaned. “You.” I whined. I didn’t notice how Richard’s eyebrows rose and his expression fell. I ran a hand down my face and stood, motioning to the chairs in front of me when I noticed Tommy behind him. 

“I’m sorry.” I heard Richard say quietly but I ignored him. 

“(Y/N)! Long time no see!” Tommy said, just as energetic as I had always known him to be. “I graduated college finally. If you didn’t hear.” I nodded and gave him a small smile. 

“Congrats Tommy!” I said with forced excitement. I looked between the two and took a second to realize something was wrong. “Wait. Where’s Tom?” The look on Richard’s face didn’t escape me this time. “What happened?” My voice dropped into almost a whisper. 

“My dad died.” Tommy said quietly. I held out my hand to him and he took it. 

“I’m sorry Tommy. He was always the nicest man I could have ever wanted to know.” I said. Richard looked at me before jumping in. 

“Callahan is about to go under. We are trying to sell Tom’s latest idea to get the money to keep the company going. They are brake pads.” He said. I nodded. 

“I remember those. He finally got them going. Good.” I looked down at the paperwork that my grandfather had given me. He said not to buy anything under any circumstances but he didn’t know what was going on. “We’ll take a hundred.” Richard’s eyes widened and Tommy looked over at him with a smile. 

“Seriously? Without the pitch?” Richard questioned. I nodded. 

“Tom was like a father to me and he helped me during the worst time of my life.” A look was shot at Richard. “I wouldn’t know half of what I know now if it wasn’t for him. So yes I want a hundred brake pads from Callahan. And if you need any help selling them, I want in.” Tommy stood up to hug me. I laughed as he pulled me out of my seat and I watched as Richard’s face lit up. Once the paperwork was done, the boys followed me home so I could pack for the trip. I left the two in my kitchen as I did my work. 

“What did you do to them?” I heard Tommy whisper to Richard. I could imagine the look Richard was giving Tommy at the moment. Taking a second to make sure they were not outside my door, I reached under my pillow for the picture that I kept there. I bit my lip to stop myself from letting out a sigh as I looked down at the slightly younger Richard standing with his arm around me and his head on top of mine. Longing filled me as I tucked the picture in between the clothes in my suitcase. Finishing my packing and zipping the suitcase, I realized I hadn’t heard Richard’s response. Not like it mattered anyway. There was a knock on my door and my head snapped up. 

“You were taking a while. I thought I’d come and see if you needed help.” Richard stood in the doorway awkwardly. I nodded and pointed to the second suitcase. 

“I need some clothes put in there.” I said as I grabbed my toiletry bag. We worked in silence as we did our respective jobs. 

“I’m sorry for what I had done to you.” Richard said quietly as he stood on one side of the bed with a suitcase in his hand. “I never meant to hurt you. I didn’t know you were in the room when I threw the book. I thought….” Richard broke off and his voice broke. A hand ran down his face and it looked like he was on the verge of tears. “I thought I was alone and that the book would fall before it hit anything. I can’t throw.” A bitter laugh broke the silence. “Then again that should have told me that I would nearly hit you with it.” 

“Richard, you know that wasn’t why I left.” I said quietly. Richard’s eyes met mine and I took a deep breath. “I left because even though I had forgiven you, you couldn’t forgive yourself. You didn’t hit me. You didn’t even scare me. I could hear the yelling before I walked into the room. I was going to check on you when that book flew through the door.” I played with the hem of my shirt while I waited for his answer. 

“I didn’t know.” Richard said as he ran a hand through his hair. “I still feel bad about it though.” I laughed at his expression before climbing over the bed to hug him. 

“Richard do you really think that after the things I’ve thrown and nearly hit you with I would leave over a book?” Richard laughed as well while catching me in a hug. I gently pulled him back with me as I fell back onto the bed. He came with me and we stayed there for a little while before Tommy came in. He smiled at the scene he had walked in on. 

“So are we ready to head out on the road?” Tommy asked as Richard started to get up. I took the offered hand and followed the boys out of my house and into the car. It was going to be a long ride but with a guy like Richard, what more could I want?

[myveryownfanfiction]

AN: I had to. I just had to. And if you haven’t watched Tommy Boy, I highly suggest it. 

I looked over at Richard as he drove us to the airport. His jaw was set and I could see that he did not appreciate Tom Callahan sending him to pick up Tommy nor did he appreciate Tom sending me along. Richard never liked me in his car for some reason and I had long ago stopped trying to figure out why. 

“Did Callahan really need to send both of us to get his idiot son?” Richard huffed. I swallowed the lump in my throat before answering. 

“Well you know Tommy can be a handful.” I suggested quietly. “And sometimes you aren’t the most patient person in the world.” Richard glanced over at me with a smile. 

“So you keep reminding me.” He chuckled before reaching over to hold my hand. I smiled and relaxed a little in my seat. “I am working on it though.” Richard squeezed my hand before putting his hand back on the steering wheel. 

“I know you are Richard.” I remarked as I shifted in my seat. “But I doubt Tom Callahan knows that.” Richard shrugged. We carried on in silence before Richard spoke again.

“Do you know why I never like you in the car when I’m driving?” His voiced shook. I bit my lip as I shook my head. 

“No. I always assumed it was because you loved the car more than me.” I whispered. Richard pulled up at a red light and turned towards me in shock.

“What?” He exclaimed. Reaching over he took my hand again and held it tightly, even after the light turned green and he had started driving again. “No! Definitely not!” I squeezed his hand before pulling it into my lap. “I’m sorry I ever gave you that idea (Y/N). But no. I don’t like you in the car when I’m driving because you’re too distracting.” He glanced at me and winked. “And I mean that in the best way possible. I love being distracted by you.” I smiled at my lap and interlocked our fingers. 

“Just not when you’re driving.” I finished. Richard chuckled and nodded. 

“Exactly.” We pulled up on the tarmac and Richard turned to look at me. “I love you (Y/N). So much more than this car. If something happened to the car, sure I’d be sad.” Richard shrugged as he paused. “But I would be devastated if anything ever happened to you.” Richard leaned over and kissed my cheek before pulling back to look at me. 

“Honest?” I asked, my voice shaking. Richard nodded. He let go of my hand to reach up and cupped my cheeks. 

“I cross my heart.” He whispered. I smiled as I reached up to hold his wrists. “I love you.” I blushed before ducking my head a little. 

“I love you too.” I responded as Richard gently titled my head back up. He kissed me gently before pulling away.

“Better not keep Tommy Boy waiting anymore.” He joked before getting out of the car and jogging over to my side to open my door. I laughed as his hand appeared in front of me. Taking it, Richard helped me out and closed the door. He wrapped his arm around me as we waited for Tommy to get off the plane. “Just a head’s up but you’re in the back. I’m gonna need my full attention on the road if he’s in the car.” I laughed as Richard whispered in my ear. 

“He is a handful.” I whispered back as we watched Tommy struggle to get off the plane. 

“Don’t have to tell me twice.” Richard rolled his eyes before tugging me along to meet Tommy.