#Custom Recovery Plans

[screentones-webcomicresources]

There are many web hosting companies to choose from if you're taking the plunge into making your own website with a comic content management system (CMS) like ComicControl or Grawlix, a Wordpress comic theme like Toocheke or ComicPress, or a HTML template to cut/paste code like Rarebit. While these solutions are generally free, finding a home for them is... generally not. It can be hard to choose what's best for your webcomic AND your budget!

We took a look at a few of the top hosting services used by webcomics creators using webcomic CMSes, and we put out a poll to ask your feedback about your hosts!

This post may be updated as time goes on as new services enter the hosting arena, or other important updates come to light.

Questions:

💻 I can get a free account with Wix/Squarespace/Carrd, could I just use those for my comic? - Web hosts like this may have gallery functions that could be adapted to display a series of pages, but they are very basic and not intended for webcomics.

📚 Wait, I host on Webtoon, Tapas, Comic Fury, or some other comic website, why are they not here? - Those are comic platforms! We'll get into those in a future post!

🕵️‍♀️Why does it say "shared hosting"? Who am I sharing with? - "Shared hosting" refers to sharing the server space with other customers. They will not have access to your files or anything, so it is perfectly fine to use for most comic CMSes. You may experience slowing if there is too much activity on a server, so if you're planning to host large files or more than 10 comics, you may want to upgrade to a more robust plan in the future.

Web Host List

Neocities

Basic plan pricing: Free or $5/month. Free plan has more restrictions (1 GB space, no custom domain, and slower bandwidth, among other things)

Notes: Neocities does not have database support for paid or free accounts, and most comic CMS solutions require this (ComicCtrl, Grawlix, Wordpress). You will need to work with HTML/CSS files directly to make a website and post each page.

Hostinger

Basic plan pricing: $11.99/month or $7.99/month with four year commitment (monthly, 1, 2, and 4 year plans available).

Notes: Free domain for the 1st year. Free SSL Certifications. Weekly backups.

KnownHost

Basic plan pricing: $8.95/month or $7.99/month with four year commitment (monthly, 1, 2, and 4 year plans available).

Notes: Free DDOS protection. Free SSL Certifications.

InMotion Hosting

Basic plan pricing: $12.99/month or $9.99/month with three year commitment (monthly, 1, and 3 year plans available).

Notes:  Free SSL Certifications, free domain names for 1 and 3 year plans. 24/7 live customer service and 90-day money-back guarantee. Inmotion also advertises eco-friendly policies: We are the first-ever Green Data Center in Los Angeles. We cut cooling costs by nearly 70 percent and reduce our carbon output by more than 2,000 tons per year.

Reviews:

👍“I can't remember it ever going down.”

👍“InMotion has a pretty extensive library full of various guides on setting up and managing websites, servers, domains, etc. Customer service is also fairly quick on responding to inquiries.” 👎“I wish it was a bit faster with loading pages.”

Ionos Hosting

Basic plan pricing: $8/month or $6/month with three year commitment (monthly, 1, 2 and 3 year plans available).

Notes: Free domain for the first year, free SSL Certification, Daily backup and recovery is included. Site Scan and Repair is free for the first 30 days and then is $6/month.

Reviews:

👍“Very fast and simple” 👎“Customer service is mediocre and I can't upload large files”

Bluehost

Basic plan pricing: $15.99/month or $4.95/month with three year commitment (monthly, 1, 3 year plans available).

Notes: Free domain and SSL certificates (for first year only). 24/7 Customer Service. Built to handle higher traffic websites. Although they specialize in Wordpress websites and provide updates automatically, that's almost a bad thing for webcomic plugins because they will often break your site. Their cloud hosting services are currently in early access with not much additional information available.

Reviews:

👎"The fees keep going up. Like I could drop $100 to cover a whole year, but now I'm paying nearly $100 for just three months. It's really upsetting."

👎"I have previously used Bluehost’s Wordpress hosting service and have had negative experiences with the service, so please consider with a grain of salt. I can confirm at least that their 24/7 customer service was great, although needed FAR too often."

Dreamhost

Basic plan pricing: $7.99/month or $5.99/month with three year commitment (monthly, 1, 3 year plans available).

Notes: Free SSL Certificates, 24/7 support with all plans, 97-day moneyback guarantee. Not recommended for ComicCtrl CMS

Reviews:

👍“They've automatically patched 2 security holes I created/allowed by mistake.” 👍“Prices are very reasonable” 👎 “back end kind of annoying to use” 👎 “wordpress has some issues” 👎 “it's not as customizable as some might want“

GoDaddy

Basic plan pricing: $11.99/month or $9.99/month with three year commitment (monthly, 1, 2, and 3 year plans available).

Notes: Free 24/7 Customer service with all plans, Free SSL Certificates for 1 year, free domain and site migration.

Reviews:

👍Reasonable intro prices for their Economy hosting, which has 25GB of storage 👍Migrated email hosting service from cPanel to Microsoft Office, which has greater support but may not be useful for most webcomic creators. 👎 Many site issues and then being upsold during customer service attempts. 👎 Server quality found lacking in reviews 👎 Marketing scandals in the past with a reputation for making ads in poor taste. Have been attempting to clean up that image in recent years. 👎 “GoDaddy is the McDonald's of web hosting. Maybe the Wal-Mart of hosting would be better. If your website was an object you would need a shelf to put it on. You go to Wal-Mart and buy a shelf. It's not great. It's not fancy. It can only hold that one thing. And if we're being honest - if the shelf broke and your website died it wouldn't be the end of the world.The issue comes when you don't realize GoDaddy is the Wal-Mart of hosting. You go and try to do things you could do with a quality shelf. Like, move it. Or add more things to it.” MyWorkAccountThisIs on Reddit*

Things to consider for any host:

💸 Introductory/promotional pricing - Many hosting companies offer free or inexpensive deals to get you in the door, and then raise the cost for these features after the first year or when you renew. The prices in this post are the base prices that you can expect to pay after the promotional prices end, but may get outdated, so you are encouraged to do your own research as well.

💻 Wordpress hosting - Many of the companies below will have a separate offering for Wordpress-optimized hosting that will keep you updated with the latest Wordpress releases. This is usually not necessary for webcomic creators, and can be the source of many site-breaking headaches when comic plugins have not caught up to the latest Wordpress releases.

Any basic hosting plan on this list will be fine with Wordpress, but expect to stop or revert Wordpress versions if you go with this as your CMS.

🤝 You don't have to go it alone - While free hosts may be more limited, paid hosting on a web server will generally allow you to create different subdomains, or attach additional purchased domains to any folders you make. If you have other comic-making friends you know and trust, you can share your server space and split the cost!

Want to share your experience?

Feel free to contribute your hosting pros, cons, and quirks on our survey! We will be updating our list periodically with your feedback!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA For telling my partner I'd like to bring my ex into our relationship?

I'm copying this over from r/relationship_advice, because the responses are giving me the impression they don't really get what polyamory is & I'm hoping tumblr does. For reference: there's me (29M), my ex (28, Trans Man), and my partner (30M).

My ex and I were best friends in high school, went to the same college, & dated through the tail end of undergrad, for about a year and change. We ended things on very good terms, the only reason we broke up was a difference in life paths: I stayed in the city to get my Master's, he traveled constantly for his work (he's a sculptor who makes these huge custom multimedia pieces, they're genuinely some of the most beautiful things I've seen). We fell out of touch for the most part, but I'd see him popping up on social media occasionally, or he'd text me when he was in town and we'd hang out, along with some other school friends.

The last time I saw him before our present situation was about 3 1/2 years ago today. We went out for drinks, he came back to my place after, and we ended up hooking up. He stayed in town for about a week, and we hooked up a few more times, and then he left again. He sort of dropped off the face of the earth after that, but he'd always been pretty sporadic, especially when he had a big project, so I didn't think much about it.

Not long after that, I met my current partner. He's truly one of my favorite people in the whole world; he's incredibly thoughtful, and earnest, and passionate about his morals & principles (he's an environmental lawyer), and more than anything, he's someone I never feel like I have to pretend with. He asked for my number, we had our first date a few days later, and ended up staying awake the entire night just talking about anything and everything, so we went ahead and got 5am pancakes and called it our second date. We've been together for a little over 3 years now, we've been moved in together for about 2, and while we've had the occasional fight or rough patch I can definitely say I love this man, and I plan to spend the rest of my life with him.

So, the big change.

About a year ago (~2 years since seeing my ex, my partner and I have lived together for about a year at this point), my partner and I are having a night in, and there's a knock at the door. It's my ex, looking absolutely ragged, holding a 15 month old baby. As in, a baby who was conceived 24 months before then. Yep, it's pretty much what you're guessing. I let them both in, we had a sit down in the kitchen, and he told me everything he'd been doing in the past 2 years in between me cussing him out for keeping it all from me in the first place. I really do want to keep this as short as possible, so to give you the super condensed version:

She's my daughter, he's completely sure about that, there's no one else he's been with the math is even close to correct for

The second he found out he was pregnant, he more or less panicked. He's got a whole Thing about feeling like he's irresponsible/not a "real" adult, and this really set him off, so telling me felt like "admitting to fucking both our lives up" at the time. His OB/GYN said some pretty awful shit to him about not being more careful as a trans man too, which just made it all even worse

Because of all that, he'd genuinely planned to just never tell me I have a daughter & raise her completely on his own, but a few things compounded to force his hand:

The birth was really rough on him, and his recovery was slow enough he was having trouble going back to work, to the point where money was getting tight

On top of that, our daughter has celiac disease, and between paying out of pocket for blood tests & spending more on baby food she's safe to eat, things got desperate enough he went and took out a really dodgy loan from a scummy payday company

He was at our door because all of this had finally spiraled to a point where he'd lost his apartment, they'd been sleeping in his car for about a week, and he couldn't think of anything else to do

I think I was probably feeling every human emotion in existence at the same time through all of this, but the thing I remember most from the whole conversation was the way my partner kept drifting right back to the baby, and the soft way he looked at her. We put my ex & daughter up in a hotel room for the night and told him we needed to talk, and we'd discuss our options in the morning, but I think even then I kind of knew what our answer was going to be.

Sure enough, for the last year and a half we've been co-parenting our little girl, all three of us. We didn't want to juggle who's got her, or force my ex to find a place to stay, so we've turned my partner's home office into our daughter's room, and redid most of the downstairs layout so my ex could move into an actual bedroom, rather than just sleep on our pullout couch in perpetuity. We finally succeeded in convincing him that rest and recovery was more important than trying to contribute to the house finances right away, and it's been magical watching all that stress and terror slowly fall off him. It's like he's a little more alive again every time I look.

Which is where my question comes in.

I'd like to restate, I love my partner 100%. None of this changes that whatsoever. If I ask, and he says no, that will be the end of the discussion for me completely. But I have eyes. My ex is, objectively, a very attractive man. I know we work well together, and I have to admit I'm very curious to see where that same chemistry could lead now that he's not on the other side of the country half the time. I've also been noticing these little moments between him and my partner. Nothing I'd consider crossing a line, but I've caught my partner checking my ex out several times, as well as vice versa, and they get along remarkably well. Sometimes I'll go to enter a room, and see them both sitting there laughing and chatting and playing with our baby, and I'll just hang back to watch because it makes me so happy.

Add to all that, we're pretty deeply ingrained in each other's lives now. My partner and I don't often go out on dates alone anymore, but the last few times we did it felt as if my ex was missing from the table. We watched a movie together last night, and my ex sat in the middle of us with his feet in my partner's lap and his head on my chest, and it felt just as natural as my arm on my partner's shoulder. It's not about just having sex with him, and it's not that I'd want to invite any old person into our relationship. I know we already all love each other, and I think there's potential for that to become romantic between the two of us and my ex.

It just feels as though we're all holding our breath, waiting for someone else to say it first. My ex certainly isn't going to bring it up when he's living rent free in "our" home (it's his home too, but he doesn't seem to see it like that yet). My partner grew up sheltered enough that I'm not sure he's ever heard of polyamory at all, so he's not going to bring it up. That just leaves me.

My problem is, if I'm wrong about what I think I'm seeing, or if I bring it up the wrong way, I can't take it back. I don't want my partner to feel insecure or betrayed, I don't want my ex to feel pressured or put on the spot, and I definitely don't want my daughter to lose any of us, which I know could happen if we aren't all on the same page. Or worse, if we do all date and it goes badly.

Should I just keep this whole thing secret? Is that even worse? Would I be the asshole for opening this can of worms on everyone else?

Help!

[venusianpulp]

Astro Remediation: Skin Conditions

Ever wonder if you can identify which aspects and placements in your natal chart can indicate skin conditions? Well, in Vedic Astrology, I can do this for you as well as customize a remediation plan for your personal road to recovery.

This is based on Ancient Astrology and Auyrvedic Healing. I struggled with acne as well as back acne for most of my good years. Nothing ever worked but then I tried the Eastern Medicine approach and implemented my knowledge of Astrology to help create a regimine for myself. It's truly magical what Astrology can reveal to us and even remedy for us. Everything can be alchemized as long as you have the tools and knowledge in front of you.

So, message me if you're interested in a consult and Remediation plan, personalized for you!

In Vedic astrology, skin conditions can be assessed by analyzing various placements, signs, and aspects in a natal chart. The primary houses and planets to consider are the 1st house (self, physical body), 6th house (health, diseases), and the ascendant (physical appearance, constitution). The Moon, Mars, and Saturn are also important planets to consider when evaluating skin health.

Here are some possible aspects and placements that may indicate skin conditions, along with potential remediation measures:

Facial acne, cystic acne, back acne, and body acne:

Mars or Saturn in the 1st house or 6th house, especially in water signs (Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces)

Moon afflicted by Mars or Saturn, particularly in the 1st, 6th, or 8th house

Ascendant or 6th house lord afflicted by Mars or Saturn

Rahu or Ketu in the 1st or 6th house

Remediation:

Wear a red coral or bloodstone gemstone to pacify Mars

Chant the Gayatri mantra or the Maha Mrityunjaya mantra for spiritual healing

Practice stress-reducing techniques like meditation, yoga, or pranayama

Maintain a clean, healthy diet and avoid oily, spicy, or processed foods

Psoriasis and other autoimmune skin disorders:

Moon afflicted by Saturn, Rahu, or Ketu, particularly in the 1st, 6th, or 8th house

Saturn in the 1st house or 6th house, especially in fire signs (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius)

6th house lord in the 8th house or 8th house lord in the 6th house

Weak or afflicted Sun in the chart

Remediation:

Wear a moonstone or pearl to strengthen the Moon

Chant the Mahamrityunjaya mantra or the Surya mantra for healing

Practice stress-reducing techniques and maintain a regular sleep schedule

Follow a sattvic diet rich in fruits, vegetables, and whole grains

Eczema and other inflammatory skin conditions:

Pitta (fire) dominant constitution, with a strong presence of Mars, Sun, or Ketu in the chart

Mars or Ketu in the 1st house or 6th house, especially in fire signs

Ascendant or 6th house lord afflicted by Mars or Ketu

Moon afflicted by Mars or Sun, particularly in the 1st, 6th, or 8th house

Remediation:

Wear a moonstone or pearl to balance the Moon and reduce Pitta

Chant the Shiva mantra or the Durga mantra for spiritual healing

Practice cooling pranayama techniques like Sheetali or Sheetkari

Follow a Pitta-pacifying diet, avoiding spicy, sour, and fermented foods

Fungal skin infections:

Kapha (water and earth) dominant constitution, with a strong presence of Moon, Venus, or Jupiter in the chart

Moon or Venus in the 1st house or 6th house, especially in water or earth signs

Ascendant or 6th house lord afflicted by Moon or Venus

Weak or afflicted Mars in the chart

Remediation:

Wear a red coral or bloodstone to strengthen Mars and reduce Kapha

Chant the Hanuman Chalisa or the Durga mantra for spiritual healing

Practice invigorating pranayama techniques like Bhastrika or Kapalbhati

Follow a Kapha-pacifying diet, avoiding cold, heavy, and oily foods

It's important to note that these are general guidelines. I will not be revealing every remediation or chart indication in this post as there are a lot more nuances that go into harsher conditions, such as ones developed due to issues such as auto immune diseases. Additionally, while astrological remedies can be helpful, it is always advisable to consult with a qualified healthcare professional for proper diagnosis and treatment of any skin condition.

[steddieas-shegoes]

🧁Congrats on 3k followers!🧁 You were the first steddie person I followed and I'm still so glad I did! 💕

For the sentence prompt, I'm picking a line from my favorite love song - Fair by The Amazing Devil:

"Darling, I was born to press my head between your shoulder blades at night when light is fading"

Me? The first?! That’s a huge honor and I am definitely not crying about it (lying). I hope you enjoy!

♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

Steve’s migraines were bad when it rained, even worse when he’d been outside all day. Nothing helped except sleeping it off.

And pressure in just the right spot on his forehead.

It was hard to get it right on his own, and Robin was always just a bit too harsh with her fingertips against his skin, pressing too much at once in too many places. Eddie managed to touch just right sometimes, but it was hit or miss.

It was so fucking frustrating.

Eddie was frustrated too, especially when the pain got to a point that Steve didn’t even want him near him. Every smell, sound, and accidental touch made him nauseous.

They had rain most of the day, and Steve’s work day had started with Keith berating him for not rewinding one tape before putting it back on the shelf. It ended with a customer trying to steal candy from the shelves and yelling at Steve when he got caught.

By the time he got home, he could barely feel his fingers from how hard he’d been clenching the steering wheel as he drove, doing his best to focus on the road ahead. He just had to get home, then he could wash his face and get in bed.

Eddie was playing music while he made dinner, and it was nearly impossible for Steve to do anything but rush past the kitchen to their bedroom. Eddie would figure it out quickly.

Within minutes, Steve was standing at the bathroom sink in only his underwear, hot water running over the washcloth he planned on holding on his face until he could breathe again.

“Stevie, you okay?” Eddie whispered when he walked into the room.

“Migraine.”

“I’ll get you some water and the ice pack.”

Steve lost track of time as he finished up in the bathroom and settled in bed. His head wasn’t pounding so much as exploding into new galaxies every time he blinked. Somehow, closing his eyes made it worse.

He managed to make himself as comfortable as possible, barely even moving when Eddie placed the ice pack on his forehead and eyes.

“10?” Eddie asked as softly as possible, keeping his distance, but staying close enough for Steve to touch him.

“Mhm.”

“You need me to sleep on the couch?”

“No.”

The bed shifted slightly as Eddie moved further under the covers on his side. “Okay. I’m right here, sweetheart.”

The spot on his forehead was pulsing and the ice pack wasn’t doing shit.

“Turn on your side,” Steve asked, voice shaking as he tried to bite back a whimper of pain.

He felt Eddie move, and when he reached a hand out to see if he’d understood what he asked, he couldn’t help his lip turning up at the corner in an attempt at a smile.

Sometimes he was convinced the bat bites had connected them in more ways than the soft camaraderie of recovery. Sometimes it felt like they were reading the other so well, they shared a brain.

Steve slowly moved forward, wincing when his body made contact with Eddie’s. Steve pulled the ice pack away.

“Sweetheart?”

“Just a sec,” he replied.

Eddie was as still as a statue, something so rare, he probably reserved it for these moments.

Another reason Steve was certain Eddie was better than he deserved.

Steve leaned his head forward, letting out a small groan when his forehead made contact with Eddie’s back, right between his shoulder blades.

He pressed his head forward, not able to relax until he found-

There.

He nearly moaned with relief.

“Found it, angel?” Eddie whispered, not wanting to ruin the moment of painless ecstasy Steve was experiencing.

“Mm.”

“Stay as long as you need,” Eddie added before focusing on slow breathing so he wouldn’t disrupt Steve’s resting place.

Steve sighed and let himself enjoy this moment for as long as possible. He closed his eyes.

♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

When Steve woke up, the light was almost gone between the curtains and Eddie’s breathing was slowed like he was asleep.

His head still ached, but the pounding had gone, and when he looked down at Eddie’s face, everything was clear.

He’d found a place to heal in Eddie. First, his arms, then his heart, and now, the place between his shoulders.

[amptoohigh]

Haii!!! ^_^

DO NOT REPORT AND BLOCK INSTEAD, REPORTING DOSENT HELP ANYONE INVOLVED. I DO NOT ENCOURAGE ANY OF THE BEHAVIOURS MENTIONED ON MY BLOG

Please dni if your in recovery or have your follows showing.

You can call me Aeron!! (Or Ron, Ron Ron, Aer and Vix!) :3

I'm a lifestyle jirai but at something I'd like to get into the fashion (??) part!! (๑>؂•̀๑)

I dress in lolita and amekaji gyaru so be prepared to see some outfit pictures!! >:0

I do block freely if I think your vibes are off or if you're just straight up creepy

I love love LOVE asks, @'s and literally everything else!!

My intrests and hobbys consist of sewing,vocaloid, cardcaptor sakura, needy streamer overload, the song of saya, doki doki literature club, neon genisis evangelion, junji ito, wonder egg priority, k-on, my deer friend (shikanoko nokonoka koshitantan), azumanga daioh, j-fashion, studio ghilbi, doki doki precure, madoka magica, willard, tokyo mew mew, candeye syrup and more!! ^_^

More info about me + stats under the cut, please do not view if this could be triggering.

-- custom themed diets -- feel free to put requests in ^^ any fictional character (can come from a show like breaking bad for example but I won't do diets after real real people for example millie Bobby brown!) And I am also doing like style themed diets now (ill explain if thats confusing) :33

Hw : 65kg (2022)

Lw : 45kg

Gw : 46 kg

Cw : 54.5kg

Gw 2 : 42.5kg

Gw 3 : 38kg

Ugw : 35kg

Height: 5'1 / 154.9cm

My tags ⋆˚࿔

#turntheampdown - universal tumblr tag

#aeronappreciatingmedia - appreciate media such as movies, TV shows, anime and more with me .

#aeronsoutfitcollection - outfits I've worn / are proud of

#aeronscrapbook - my hobbies / interests

#aeronsawesomemoots - posts with my moots!! How did I get so many of you, I love you all so much (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞

#aeronspicrewlore - all my picrews! Mainly if not all are tags games

#aeronsplans - plans for the future

#aeronstaggames - tag games

#Angel + aer :D - shared tag with @twistedangelbones

I don't tag reblogs unless in adding to them in some way.

[honeysickledream]

'Overgrown' - Simon 'Ghost' Riley x F!Reader | Chapter Two

(photo credit: me [@honeysickledream])

warnings/tags: F!reader, no use of Y/N and no physical descriptions of reader, reader is a healer and midwife, this is set in a very vague ‘middle ages’ time, forced/arranged marriage, some angst, slow burn (heavy emphasis on slow for this entire series), miscommunication, relationship issues, relationship doubts, no smut this time around (again) but still minors DNI, brief mentions of: pregnancy (side character), childbirth and recovery (same side character gives birth off screen) | that's all, I think, but if I missed anything, lmk!

word count: ~1.2k

synopsis: You had married Simon four months ago, the whole thing some stupid forced arrangement. You had left everything you knew behind to live with Simon in his cabin a few miles out from his hometown. You weren't sure you could classify your relationship as a marriage, or even say truthfully that you lived with him because he wasn't around very often. Some part of you hopes things improve, but you're not unwillingly to do what you can to live the life you'd originally planned for.

a/n: a bit shorter than the first part, but that's what I get for procrastinating my first paper of the semester. i have to get my procrastination under wraps (they say after not doing so while in undergrad)

<- Prev. Part | Next Part ->

The walk to town seemed further today. For every step you took, the dirt path seemed to stretch another mile. You’d been up since a little after midnight, deciding to be productive with your time instead of wallowing in your bed, fuming. Four loaves had been baked, the open hearth cleaned of ash and the wood replenished for today’s use. Clean sheets had been folded and put away, a chore you had been putting off since you first hung the linens on the line, and the shelves in the larder had been dusted for the first time in well over a month. You’d even fetched water for Simon’s bath after your own, leaving them before the clean hearth to heat at his leisure. When he was around, he often fetched his own water, but you’d felt the need to do it for him today. Maybe it had been your guilt for how you acted last night that led you to the kind task. A small, silent apology. A show of care, awareness. You supposed it was another sign of guilt when you’d left a little before he woke, still on edge from his return and not wishing to subject him to any more crankiness. No, you decided to bottle up your crankiness in case someone got on your bad side, like the nosy or overly-opinionated family members your patients seemed to have in spades. The south portcullis had just finished rising as the town came into view and the woods were left behind. All but the western portcullis were left closed during the night, though you weren’t sure why. The early risers were already on the streets, the town relatively quiet, a few businesses open and preparing for customers. The baker, a sweet man with a perpetually red nose and an apron that always seemed to have a new flower embroidered on the hem by his daughter, was displaying his fresh loaves with the usual remarkable precision. Across the road, the butcher and his apprentices—his twin sons—were laying out fresh hides on the racks beside their shop. A mother exited her home, flanked by her small army of sleepy children who all had their own ways to grump at her for getting them ready for the day. An elderly couple you’d gotten to know well these last four months, both regularly needing new pots pepper pastes and lavender, barely poultices for their joint pains, were slowly walking their usual route. When they waved to you, you waved back and gave them a warm smile. They had been married for ages, had a gaggle of children who each had gaggles of their own. Their oldest son and his family had moved back to the town a few weeks ago to be close to the aging couple and you saw them often when you did your house-visits. Nice enough folks, the oldest son and his family, and they always made sure to stay out of the way when you went about your business. The son had even tried to give you some extra coin for tending to his parents, which you kindly declined, telling him that you charged the same for everyone, no ifs, ands or buts about it. You turned down narrow road and made your way to the fifth door on the left, rapping your knuckles against the faded red door three times. Today was a one patient day, the other healers and midwives in the town tending to your usual patients as well as their own, and for good reason. The woman who answered was sweaty and out of breath, teeth clenched. You glanced to her gravid belly and gave her a sympathetic look. Apparently your suggested methods of inducing labor had worked, and by the tension in her shoulders and the exhaustion in her eyes, early labor had been going on for quite some time, and the likelihood of a quick transition to active labor now that you were here, was slim. ***

The late afternoon had been greeted by the sweet wails of a newborn, and those stopped outside the home, waiting with bated breath for babe’s arrival, broke out in cheers and song. Once the mother and babe were clean and situated, you began the second part of your duties as midwife: tending to the home for an easier transition. You sent the dirtied sheets and the mother’s shroud to a laundress paid for with the money from your skirt pocket, then prepared a light meal for the family since such excitement and tension could cause a heavy meal to not sit properly. After the new mother’s husband returned, and your final check for her and the babe’s health was completed, you took your payment, stuffed your messed apron into your medical bag and left. As was your tradition following a successful delivery, you popped into the bakery and ordered a small fruit tart. You ate it slowly as you stood outside and watched as the evening crowds began to form as the sky turned a sweet mixture of lilac and peony. The tart was flaky, the sugar on top not yet dissolved, and the fruit inside had just the right amount of tang. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw a familiar figure: Simon. Simon? Your heart painfully skipped a beat as your eyes followed him as he went to the butcher’s. You finished the rest of your tart quickly and dusted your hands off as you wove through the crowds to catch up to him. Seeing him in town was a first, you were nearly sure of that. And you were entirely sure that it was him when you peered through the window of the butcher’s shop, catching the eye of the butcher himself, his twin sons, and finally Simon whose brows rose slowly at you. There was a passing of coin and scribbled-on parchment, then Simon headed right for the door. Right for you. You quickly pushed away from the window and turned to face the crowds of people as if nothing had happened at all. Except it had, and you were sure you were about to be given a plethora of strange looks by Simon. Yet he didn’t give you a strange look. He did search your face, though, then looked you up and down. His eyes lingered on your torso, noting the absence of your apron, you supposed. “Done for the day?” he asked. You nodded. “I only had one patient today, and I’m thankful for that.” You chewed your cheek as you stood there beside him, the two of you looking towards the townspeople who didn’t pay either of you any mind. You looked down and noticed the basket in his left hand, the list inside it, and the money in your skirt pocket seemed to suddenly weigh a ton. Your mind wandered to the flimsy floorboard in your bedroom, the one by your door that you pried up almost every day, and what was underneath it. Money. Most of the money you earned from your profession went into the satchel hidden under the floorboard. A failsafe, an escape plan in case you couldn’t bear to remain in the marriage. “Are you headed to the market?” you asked before you could stop yourself. There was an opportunity lurking if he was. When he nodded, you followed suit. “I’ll come along,” you told him. “Maybe we could talk, too?”

[akwolfgrl]

Recipe for recovery 9

Robin was reading Sanji's notes on the crew's preferences while sipping her coffee when she heard Zoro carrying Sanji enter the galley. She had left the door open for them. Thankfully, it seems as if Sanji slept in a bit.

“Place him over here, there a cushion on a chair for his legs,” Robin pointed out with an extra set of hands as she fluffed the cushion, another set started the kettle for tea. They often would sit and drink coffee and tea while he planned out the meals for the day as she read a book. It was a bit of quiet time she enjoyed, she loved how crazy and chaotic the crew could be, but sometimes a quiet moment was nice. She watched as Zoro carefully placed Sanji down where she told him to. “You don't need to stay,” She informed him when it appeared as if he had no plans to leave.

“No, it looks like rain again. I'll stay here.” She smiled behind her mug as Zoro settled in next to Sanji. Those two were obvious and yet oblivious on how they felt about one another.

“I don't think it's a good idea for the crew to go explore the island today, I don't want anyone else to get hurt.” Sanji pointed out as he got settled. As soon as he spoke, the rain began. She could hear it hitting the roof and deck outside. “Pancakes should be easy, maybe even okonomiyaki for the cabbage, of course plenty of bacon and sausage for Luffy. There should be a nice ham we can also feed our glutton of a capitan.”

“Oi!” Zoro grumbled from his spot. “Not a cabbage!”

“Yes you are, you are what you eat.”

“I'll let this slide this time cook if you add some fermented kimchi to the batter instead of fresh cabbage.”

“Fine, since you and I are the only ones who like anyway. I honestly thought Usopp would, but he says it's too sour.”

Robin watched, amused at the twos banter. Their feelings for each other were rather obvious. When they would do something about it, it reminded them to be seen. Robin bloomed a few extra hands and set up the baking trays. “Two for bacon and one for sausage?”

“Oh Robin, you're so smart and observant! That's the right amount.” Sanji gushed, turning his attention back to her. “I was thinking sheet pan Pancakes would be easier for you, we would do it for catering back when the bratie wasn't as well known. When we had time for it. You'll be able to customize the pancakes more easily as well.”

Robin and Zoro, with Sanji's instruction and guidance, managed to whip up a breakfast for the crew, and not a moment too soon as their captain came barling in, dripping as he went. Robin couldn't imagine cooking this much food all day every day. She had extra limbs to aid her. She has to admit that Sanji always made it look easy and effortless whenever she watched him, a true labor of love.

[jumpywhumpywriter]

Living Weapon Whumpee part 25

Warnings: forced living weapon/fighter, recovery whump, reluctant alliance, preparing for war

And finally... finally... they had a viable plan.

The team was allowed to rest for the next four days to allow Jake to heal up. As leader, Jake played a crucial role out in the field -- the one everyone looked to for instructions and orders to carry out. A single person calling the shots that everyone listened to, to avoid confusion or mixed signals.

And on the fifth day... it was finally time to head out on the mission, and Flint had briefed them on the situation and gone over the details of the plan.

Jake's team was to infiltrate the North side of Leader's base, navigate their way to the room where all important files were kept to plant powerful explosives. Then they'd hide as many other charges as they could while they slipped back out of the building.

Once out, the explosives would be detonated, destroying Leader's base entirely. But the fight wouldn't end there. Flint would have his small army lying in wait close by, and once Jake's team was safely out and the base was brought down they'd charge forward to fight the remainders of Leader's army in the chaos before anyone could prepare and defend themselves.

Because Leader's army was larger and had more numbers, so Flint needed to outsmart them to win. Numbers weren't on his side, but with the distraction and havoc the explosion would bring his men might stand a decent chance against the unfavorable odds.

Whumpee was taken to a room he'd never been to before that was stocked with all sorts of protective gear and weaponry. The team got tacked up with practiced ease, but he struggled a bit to figure out where everything went on his body. He'd always worn a single set of familiar battle armor on the battlefield, nothing like this new style he was being provided with with extra straps and leather panels in different spots than he was used to. At least Flint had had the foresight to get his war attire custom-made to accommodate his huge size and muscles.

"Need a hand?" Whumpee turned to find Max watching him, amusement glittering in his eyes.

He nodded sheepishly, and Max came over to assist, having a little trouble at first reaching high enough to get the neck hole of the leather armor over his head before strapping it snugly to his big frame.

"Not what you're used to, eh?" he teased lightheartedly as he moved on to strapping the hard leather leg guards on.

"No. I'm used to wearing something more... durable," Whumpee grunted, testing out his range of motion. His old armor had been made of thin metal with a leather suit on top that covered it all, something that would be far too heavy and awkward for a normal human to fight in but was perfect for an overpowered living weapon like him.

"Whatever you say, big guy," Max shrugged once he was done.

"Whumpee? I need to borrow you for a moment." Whumpee turned down see Flint at the doorway, beckoning to him.

"Thanks for the help," he told Max and obediently walked over to Flint. "What is it?"

"There's someone who wants to see you before you set off," Flint chuckled.

Whumpee's face lit up knowingly as he followed the leader down the halls, his chest feeling just a little bit lighter.

⏪️ Back Next ⏩️

Masterlist

@scoundrelwithboba @lumpofsand @isikedmyself878 @iamheretohurt @fleur-a-whump

@ay5ksal @otterfrost @sausages-things @i-don't-know-sal @togzy

@whump-till-ya-jump @cravesunconditionallove @whumpwritinglover222 @silly-scroimblo-skrunkl @cepheusgalaxy

[boxboxblog]

How Do F1 Cars Work?: Braking, Cooling, Sensors

I never know how to start these posts. Let's dive in.

Braking and Cooling

Brakes are an incredibly important part of any car, but most especially in F1. With the speed and power the cars have a sensitive, sturdy, and strong braking system must exist. In the case of modern cars, F1 uses an extremely efficient and durable carbon-carbon disc brake system. This allows the car to screech to a halt in a split-second, and allows drivers to use their speedy reaction times to the best of their ability. When the driver steps on the brake pedal, it compresses two master brake cylinders, one for the front wheels and one for the rear, which generate fluid pressure.

For the front tires, the fluid pressure is delivered directly to the front brake calipers (part that houses brake pads and pistons). Inside each caliper, six pistons clamp pads against the disc and it is this friction that slows the car down. For the rear tires it is a bit different.

At the rear, the car can brake by three separate sources: friction from the brakes, resistance from the spinning engine (engine braking) and electrical braking that results from harvesting energy from the MGU-K . Although the driver can adjust each of these on his steering wheel, when he presses the brake pedal, the three systems work together via the Brake By Wire (BBW) system.

When the driver presses the pedal, the fluid pressure generated in the rear braking circuit is picked up by an electronic pressure sensor. The signal from this sensor represents the overall rear braking demand from the driver and is passed to the Electronic Control Unit (ECU) where it is turned into a series of commands to brake the rear of the car. The ECU distributes its efforts to the three systems according to the the set up of the car and this is altered by the way that the driver has adjusted the switch settings on the steering wheel. This is what teams mean when they say changing the setting on the car.

Going hand-in-hand with braking, cooling is another important part of the car, especially for brakes. Basically, there is a series of systems that cools the power unit, brakes, and electronics. If the car overheats, it can lead to damage and lack of performance. There are a few ways to cool. Radiators cool the engine and hybrid system. Intercooler cools the air that the turbocharger compresses before it enters the engine. Brake cooling ducts bring air to the brakes in order to stop them from overheating.

2. Electronics and Sensors

So i'm sure many of you have looked at the steering wheel and been baffled that this thing that looks like a Nintendo Switch steers that car. The F1 steering wheel is incredibly complex and has a variety of buttons, screens, and knobs. For example, on the steering wheel is an area for strat settings, where their plans for all eventualities are mapped out. There is also a rotary knob for MGU-K settings, where drivers can switch around when faced with possible failures. The menu allows drivers control over every setting in the car. Beyond that there is the pit lane speed button, gear change buttons, race start button, energy recovery button, and brake balance knob, among others. It really tells you how much drivers do in a race beyond racing.

Other than the steering wheel, there is also the telemetry, over 300 sensors which gathers race data and sends it back to engineers on the pit wall. This way, engineers can either remotely alter settings and strat, or advise the driver on what to do.  F1 uses a customized mesh wireless network system based on WiMax 802.16 at each racetrack. The sensors record data, which is then temporarily stored in the Electronic Control Unit (ECU), which controls functions like engine performance and power steering. That sensor data then travels wirelessly to a centralized location managed by F1. F1 then sends the data to the relevant team, of course very securely. Teams then use a system called Advanced Telemetry Linked Acquisition System (ATLAS) to view and analyze sensor data.

The final pretty important electronic devices on an F1 car is the many many cameras. The most recognizable camera is found in the "T" structure that sits atop of every F1 car. It gives viewers that top-down, forward facing view used often by broadcasters. this is also how viewers often distinguish between cars of the same team. One driver will have a yellow camera, the other has black. The two nose cameras provides a view of the front wing and low circuit. The 360 camera is on top of the chassis and provides a wide view of the race track, and everything else around the car. The driver facing camera is pointed directly at the driver and helps keep track of how they are doing, and in the event of the crash helps marshals and rescuers figure out the best way to help. The two rear cameras are settled on a rear facing structure, and allows the pit wall to see what is going on directly behind the driver and advise. Beyond these ones, drivers also have cameras inside their helmets, showing exactly what they see. Can't get away with much in an F1 car.

3. How They Work Together

So, we now know the basics of most parts of the car. But these parts all must work together before that car will go anywhere. How do they do it?

One of the more obvious relationships is between aerodynamics and power. The better the aerodynamics, the more usable the power is. They also work in tandem around different parts of the track. On corners the aerodynamics keep the car stable while the power peters off. On straights the power keeps the car boosted. Suspension and tires are also very connected. It is the suspension that keeps the tires on the ground. A good suspension will also mean that the tires are easier to manage, something any driver knows is highly important. Brakes and ERS are also connected because the brakes help recover ERS, pretty simply. Also the cooling system works with most of teh car, cooling engine, tires, and brakes. The biggest connection is probably between all the sensors on the car. They are connected to every single part, and even a small bit of damage can destroy them. The non-sensor components have to accommodate for the sensors and work perfectly with them in order for proper data to be sent back.

The ultimate goal of engineers is to create a car that works in harmony all together. The integration of the engine to the chassis is highly important. There have been cars that the parts were fantastic on their own, but the minute they were put together stopped working completely. Its why teams that produce their own engines have such a leg up over non-manufacturers. Its also why sometimes you will see a car that is running poorly until one small thing is changed, and then suddenly its brand new. Car harmony really is terribly important.

Alright, done! While I covered most of the important stuff, as always if there is any particular part of the car anyone wants me to dive deeper into, please let me know.

Cheers,

-B

[infohazardouz]

DEMON AU UPDATE: everything's dead (somewhat of a vent)

not to alarm you, just to grab your attention

some readers might've noticed that i've brought up problems with my laptop before- unfortunately, the ol' thing totally kicked the bucket yesterday and is now completely beyond repairing.

Unfortunately, it died unexpectedly and I don't have a backup of my stuff for about a years worth. This of course includes the entirety of the demon au, my pages that were in progress, and every other thing I had planned for tumblr.

I'm already working from a new laptop- it was mandatory to buy one for college, so I guess things worked out in that regard- but honestly I've been really depressed about exactly how much I lost. A year and a half isn't a lot of time until it's as though it's never happened.

I keep realizing small things that are now gone forever- custom brushes I relied on, my own fonts, tons and tons of memories. I'm honestly feeling really blindsided by the whole thing. To make matters worse, things are looking dire in the way of online recovery- I lost my Firefox account and all the data that was stored on there, and I'm 70 bucks out on the battery replacement that killed the laptop in the first place on top of the 2k the new laptop cost. I'm in a really dire position right now, and it's really hard for me to look at the positives although I'm really trying my best. So I just wanted to announce that until I can get my bearings, I'm gonna have to put the demon au on a short/indefinite hiatus.

I'm sorry folks, but it gets worse. I really, really hate to do this, but I'm not doing well financially as a result of all this, and if i have any hope of recovering any of my data it's by taking the HDD off my old laptop and putting it into an adapter to hopefully move things to my new system. I'm trying to save up for this $20 adapter right now <-

If you're able, I would appreciate from the bottom of my heart if you could drop a few bucks into my ko-fi here:

I've made a goal for the 20 necessary for the adapter, so you know when I've reached the amount.

I hate the idea of asking people to donate to strangers over the internet, so I will draw a doodle of your choice for any donation amount of any value if you are able to donate. Otherwise, I completely understand, and I appreciate you so much for reading this far!

UPDATE: @himboextraordinaire did an absolutely incredible thing and just donated the entire 20 I needed to order the adapter. I'm incredibly overcome with emotion over this, and I'll be removing the link to my ko-fi just to make sure no one donates by accident.

Thank you so, so much. It means the world to me what you just did for me <33

Again, I'm really really sorry, everyone. I didn't mean to let anyone down, and I really do want to get back to this comic whenever I am able- and I feel really bad about asking for donations on top of things, but I honestly don't know what else to do. I hope you guys understand, appreciate you all very much always <333

[floppydiskettess]

Hello! I was wondering if you could do headcanons for the valorant agents: Gekko, Neon, Yoru, Phoenix with sova and chamber or whoever you feel with an s/o that when they’re in danger is able to kill whatever or whoever’s endangering them wether it’s like 15+ people or so (like Millie with moxie from helluva boss)

hi anon! tysm for the request!!!! this was a blast to write ahhh!!! :D (also i love helluva boss omg)

but i hope i wrote this right!!!

Gekko

the two of you were on a mission at bind, it was simple. you go difuse the spike while he was assigned to watch your back.

he had to walk a few feet away to pick up wingman for five minutes, you would be fine right?

once he picked up wingman, he heard a loud bang behind him and a loud celebratory woop

"oh fuck."

he turned around and saw the familar wild colours from raze's showstopper.

"no no no! shit you good?" he called through the smoke

he hated the silence he recieved back. as the smoke cleared he saw your paint covered and burnt body.

"...cariño?...shit, wingman, go get the others. i got these guys."

he pulled out his customized spectre as he prepared to fight. he detained as many as he could before swiftly wiping them out one by one.

when the team arrived with wingman, sage quickly rushed to your side to aid you.

once he finished taking care of the enemies, he ran to your side

"i am so sorry...i thought i could go grab wingman but you got hurt...i am really sorry.."

Neon

a/n: this is small bc i wrote a whole ass essay for neon and it deleted....im so mad...im just trying to summarize it

"HOY! IM PISSED."

that was the last thing before you felt a sharp pain in your stomach as your vision went black.

you don't know what happened, but somehow yoru had gotten behind you. it was supposed to be a quick and simple mission. neon took A-site and you took B-site. unfortunately, right when neon approached B-site to check on you. she saw it.

red. the snow was covered in a beautiful shade of red. and it wasn't from your attacked. neon could feel electricity enter her fingertips as she lost control of her abilities.

you felt neon carrying you before falling uncomcious.

neon carried you to the jet and brought you to sage.

"im sorry...when i saw them like that i just...lost control of my abilities.."

"its ok, you did it to protect them. you saved them."

Phoenix

he was just returning from his "run it back" when he opened his eyes to see the enemy phoenix staring back at him, aiming his ghost at his own forehead.

he went to grab for his ghost but he found an empty holster.

"ah shit."

"you really thought i wouldn't just take your weapon? i'm not as foolish as you are."

phoenix braced for impact as he heard the gun fire, but the shot never came. he nervously opened his eyes to see you standing infront of him, a gunshot hole through your shoulder as you pushed the enemy phoenix away.

"dear?! what the-"

he watched as your limp body falls to the ground, feeling worry and rage overtake him.

"oh fam...your gonna regret that." he says to the opposite phoenix as the rest of his team approaches for backup.

when skye arrived at the site to treat you, she did not expect to see 5 charred bodies sprawled across the ground.

"mate...what happened?!"

"they ambushed us. (name) saved me cause i made a dumb mistake. go heal them, i am fine." he said with a dark tone to his voice

when skye healed you and you awoke, you were immediately greeted to the smell of burning. you turned your head towards phoenix as you saw him crouch beside you.

"thank god...why would you do that?! i'm sorry if i had checked my surroundings better you would have-" he rambles

you cut him off with a kiss as you feel his tired body begin to relax.

"no. i should have thought of a better plan. i am sorry i worried you."

for the next few days of your recovery, he will be by your side assisting you with anything you need. both of you content to try and ignore what happened that day.

Yoru

prior to meeting you, he was an extremely anger filled person. he still gets angry easy, but not as badly as before. you taught him how to control his emotions

but if he were to see you ganged up on in a mission, he would just lose control.

he was over at A-site at haven preparing to extract the radianite, before hearing your frantic voice shout through the comms for backup.

his heart dropped, he realized why his site was so empty along with the others. they had five-stacked onto one site. you had gone to C-site all alone. shit.

he immediately threw the spike towards Astra who had accompanied him to the A.

"stay here. i will go provide backup."

"alone? alright...stay safe."

he quickly teleported to your C-site to be met with a shocking sight. your battered and blood covered body lying down on the rough ground. burns and scratches littered your arms and legs. phoenix..

he looked up from your body to see the enemy phoenix, jett, chamber, astra, and skye staring at him with bloodthirsty gazes. they had teamed up on you because you were alone... how fucking sick could they be to attack a helpless sentienel.

he felt himself snap as he caught the enemy phoenix's cocky smirk. the cunt was proud of what he did.

when you regain conciousness, you are lying on the ground surrounded by the shredded corpses of the omega agents, a stained red yoru standing above them with his famous butterfly comb stained.

"...ryo?"

he turns around and immediately runs to your side.

"shit...thank god you are awake. don't move. help is coming ok?" he softly whispers while carressing your blood matted hair.

"are they...?"

"don't worry about them, you are safe now darling..."

when you make it back to base, you find out he took them all down on his own. when astra arrived at the site she had to practically tear yoru off of where he was mauling the corpses of the omega agents bodies.

he was ordered to talk to sage about his anger, but he never regretted what he did. he did it to save you and all that mattered was he had you back with him.

Cypher

he is used to killing to protect those he loves, this is nothing new to him.

he might be a cold killer, but you always knew he would never hurt you.

if someone was threatening you, he would keep them away using blackmail, but if it was more serious, he was prepared.

he sat waiting at the doors for the agents who had gone on your mission to come back. he was ready to greet you but he never thought he would have seen KA/YO holding you slung over his shoulder covered in blood.

he immediately freezes as he watches KA/YO rush to Sage's office. but he quickly recovers and follows quickly behind silently.

when sage caught sight of your body, she grimaced knowing it was bad. she ordered everyone out and allowed her space to work.

cypher was left with no answers as to what happened, as he sat anxiously outside Sage's office he hears KA/YO's robotic voice informing Viper of what happened.

"they went to go flank A alone, but their cypher must have seen her coming. when we arrived at A-site they were gone with the spike, they must have ambushed y/n and left her there for us to find...it was..bad. skye was able to help a little bit but...when we got there, they were missing their hand. im pretty sure they were awake when they did it."

"bastards..."

cypher could feel his blood BOILING. it was one thing to knock someone out, it was another to mutilate someone while they were awake. that wasn't fighting, that was mere torture.

he knew in this job people would get hurt. but he never thought they would ever go this far.

he was greatful you had lived, but he felt a burning feeling in his body.

as viper walked by, she stoped and turned to simply say.

"i know she was special to you Cypher, but don't do anything stupid. we don't need two people to revive."

he stood in place before walking to his room, he would make sure they couldn't hurt you. EVER again.

at the peak of night, he slipped out of his room and headed towards the armoury. he grabbed a ghost and a phantom before quietly walking towards the loading dock. he would make them regret ever hurting you.

.......

in the morning, you were awoken to a tired looking sage.

"welcome back my child. you sure gave us a scare there. how do you feel?" she smiled wistfully

as she filled you in, you couldn't help but wonder where your partner was. typically he was by your bedside until you woke up.

"Ling...where is Cy?" you softly asked

she grinned at the nickname "don't worry, he is in brimstones office. your little boyfriend pulled a stunt to avenge you."

"oh god, is he ok? what did he do?" you sigh

"oh don't worry, he is fine! the agents who ambushed you on the other hand.."

you and sage converse for a while, before you see cypher nervously walk into the room

"my darling! how are you feeling? do you need anything?" he asks worriedly

"i feel good amir. don't worry. sage is taking good care of me!" you chuckle

he sighs in relief, he may have gotten a lecture (and maybe some cleaning duty...) but it was all worth it to see your face again.

☤ Sage ☤

full battle sage mode

she would grab an odin off her copies body and just start spraying.

"you will not kill my allies!"

the second the enemies were down, she rushes to your side to heal you.

she will work all night if she has to, as long as it brings you back to her

"please wake up dearest...i can't live without you."

sorry idk what to write for sage HELP

a/n: aaa tysm for the support on my last posts!! im so glad that people are enjoying these! :) im currently working on some other requests so stay tuned ^^!!

also i apologize for the delay!! i have kinda had a lack of motivation lately so i struggled to finish it...

[spacetimewithstuartgary]

NASA payload aims to probe moon's depths to study heat flow

Earth's nearest neighboring body in the solar system is its moon, yet to date, humans have physically explored just 5% of its surface. It wasn't until 2023—building on Apollo-era data and more detailed studies made in 2011–2012 by NASA's automated GRAIL (Gravity Recovery and Interior Laboratory) mission—that researchers conclusively determined that the moon has a liquid outer core surrounding a solid inner core.

As NASA and its industry partners plan for continued exploration of the moon under Artemis in preparation for future long-duration missions to Mars, improving our understanding of Earth's 4.5-billion-year-old moon will help teams of researchers and astronauts find the safest ways to study and live and work on the lunar surface.

That improved understanding is the primary goal of a state-of-the-art science instrument called LISTER (Lunar Instrumentation for Subsurface Thermal Exploration with Rapidity), 1 of 10 NASA payloads flying aboard the next delivery for the agency's CLPS (Commercial Lunar Payload Services) initiative and set to be carried to the surface by Firefly Aerospace's Blue Ghost 1 lunar lander.

Developed jointly by Texas Tech University in Lubbock and Honeybee Robotics of Altadena, California, LISTER will measure the flow of heat from the moon's interior. Its sophisticated pneumatic drill will penetrate to a depth of 3 meters into the dusty lunar regolith.

Every half-meter it descends, the drilling system will pause and extend a custom-built thermal probe into the lunar regolith. LISTER will measure two different aspects of heat flow: thermal gradient, or the changes in temperature at various depths, and thermal conductivity, or the subsurface material's ability to let heat pass through it.

"By making similar measurements at multiple locations on the lunar surface, we can reconstruct the thermal evolution of the moon," said Dr. Seiichi Nagihara, principal investigator for the mission and a geophysics professor at Texas Tech. "That will permit scientists to retrace the geological processes that shaped the moon from its start as a ball of molten rock, which gradually cooled off by releasing its internal heat into space."

Demonstrating the drill's effectiveness could lead to more innovative drilling capabilities, enabling future exploration of the moon, Mars, and other celestial bodies. The science collected by LISTER aims to contribute to our knowledge of lunar geology, improving our ability to establish a long-term presence on the moon under the Artemis campaign.

Under the CLPS model, NASA is investing in commercial delivery services to the moon to enable industry growth and support long-term lunar exploration. As a primary customer for CLPS deliveries, NASA aims to be one of many customers on future flights. NASA's Marshall Space Flight Center in Huntsville, Alabama, manages the development of 7 of the 10 CLPS payloads carried on Firefly's Blue Ghost lunar lander.

IMAGE: LISTER (Lunar Instrumentation for Subsurface Thermal Exploration with Rapidity) is 1 of 10 payloads flying aboard the next delivery for NASA’s CLPS (Commercial Lunar Payload Services) initiative. The instrument is equipped with a drilling system and thermal probe designed to dig into the lunar surface. Credit: Firefly Aerospace

[thoughtportal]

Microsoft deal would reopen Three Mile Island nuclear plant to power AI

Pennsylvania’s dormant Three Mile Island nuclear plant would be brought back to life to feed the voracious energy needs of Microsoft under an unprecedented deal announced Friday in which the tech giant would buy 100 percent of its power for 20 years.

The restart of Three Mile Island, the site of the worst nuclear accident in U.S. history, would mark a bold advance in the tech industry’s quest to find enough electric power to support its boom in artificial intelligence.The plant, which Pennsylvanians thought hadclosed for good in 2019 amid financial strain, would come back online by 2028 under the agreement, according toplant owner Constellation Energy.

If approved by regulators, Three Mile Island would provide Microsoft with the energy equivalent it takes to power 800,000 homes, or 835 megawatts. Never before has a U.S. nuclear plant come back into service after being decommissioned, and never before has all of a single commercial nuclear power plant’s output been allocated to a single customer.

But the economics of both the power and computing industries are changing rapidly. Tech companies are scouring the nation for power that is both reliable and helps them meet their pledge to fuel AI development with zero emissions electricity — driving a nuclear power revival.

“The energy industry cannot be the reason China or Russia beats us in AI,” said Joseph Dominguez, chief executive of Constellation. “This plant never should have been allowed to shut down, ... It will produce as much clean energy as all of the renewables [wind and solar] built in Pennsylvania over the last 30 years.”

Follow Climate & environment

The four-year restart plan would cost Constellation about $1.6 billion, he said, and is dependent on federal subsidies in the form of tax breaks earmarked for nuclear power in the 2022 Inflation Recovery Act.

Constellation will also need to clear steep regulatory hurdles, including intensive safety inspections from the federal Nuclear Regulatory Commission, which has never before authorized the reopening of a plant. The deal also raises thorny questions about the federal tax breaks, as the energy from the plant would all be produced for a single private company rather than a utility serving entire communities.

A partial reactor meltdown at Three Mile Island in 1979 sent the nation into a panic and the nuclear industry reeling. The unit that Constellation plans to fire back up sits adjacent to the one that malfunctioned 45 years ago.

Constellation and Microsoft conceived the novel deal to solve a deepening energy problem. The sprawling data centers Microsoft and other digital giants need have become so big and energy-intensive that they are straining existing power supplies across the nation.

Constellation disclosed months ago that it was exploring options for restarting Three Mile Island, which sits along the Susquehanna River. The news was met with mixed reactions. Nuclear safety advocates expressed alarm. But some community leaders welcomed the development, seeing potential to revive an economic anchor in a region beset with financial hardship. A study funded by the Pennsylvania Building & Construction Trades Council says a reopening would create 3,400 jobs at the plant and in businesses serving it and its workers, and generate $3 billion in state and federal taxes.

The tax breaks in the Inflation Recovery Act are crucial to making the deal economically feasible, according to Constellation. They provide a credit for every megawatt hour of nuclear energy produced.

Constellation declined to provide details about its contract with Microsoft or disclose the value of tax credits. Energy Secretary Jennifer Granholm has said in the past that federal subsidies could cut the cost of bringing a new plant on line by as much as half.

The announcement of the Microsoft deal follows an agreement Amazon reached with Talen Energy to purchase power produced by the financially troubled Susquehanna nuclear plant for a planned data center campus in Pennsylvania. That arrangement is running into snags with regulators, as regional utilities express concern that their ratepayers will be saddled with the bill for the power grid updates needed.

Amazon’s plan also raised concerns among clean-energy advocates that tech companies are shifting from driving the transition to clean energy to elbowing others out of it by claiming such large amounts of available clean electricity for themselves.

Dominguez argues that the Three Mile Island case is an example of how Silicon Valley’s outside-the-box thinking will help stabilize the power grid for everyone. The power from the plant will not go directly to Microsoft facilities but into the overtaxed regional power grid that serves 65 million people across 13 states and the District of Columbia, called the PJM Interconnection.

Nuclear power is considered “clean” because unlike burning natural gas or coal to produce electricity, it does not create greenhouse gas emissions. The plants are expensive to build or restart, and industry still has no long-term solution for spent but highly radioactive uranium fuel rods.

“This agreement is a major milestone in Microsoft’s efforts to help decarbonize the grid in support of our commitment to become carbon negative,” said a statement from Bobby Hollis, vice president of energy at Microsoft.

Dominguez said other ratepayers on the PJM grid will not be expected to shoulder any of the costs, nor will Constellation be seeking special subsidies fromthe state of Pennsylvania.

Constellation has already been doing extensive testing at Three Mile Island.It says most of its components are ready to operate again. “The plant is in extraordinary shape,” Dominguez said.

Three Mile Island is not the only nuclear plant the industry is eager to revive. The owners of a plant in Western Michigan called Palisades are also working to bring that dormant facility back. That project was approved for a $1.5 billion federal loan guarantee. The plant owner, Holtec, says it hopes to feed nuclear energy from Palisades into the region’s power grid by late next year.

The Palisades effort came about at the urging of Michigan Gov. Gretchen Whitmer (D), as her state struggles to both meet its climate goals and generate adequate energy. The plant was destined for permanent closure when Holtec acquired it in 2022. The company had planned to decommission the facility but changed course after conversations with the governor.

On Wednesday, though, that plan was dealt a setback when federal nuclear regulators disclosed “a large number of steam generator tubes” could be faulty and need further inspection. Holtec said the finding does not alter its plans. But some nuclear safety advocates argue the company’s push to quickly reopen the plant puts the public at risk.

The huge cost and regulatory headaches associated with nuclear power are not deterring the tech industry from betting on it. In a remarkable turn of fortune for an industry that just a few years ago was struggling to stay competitive and focused mostly on closing plants, it now finds itself in expansion mode. Beyond seeking contracts for power from existing plants, tech companies are also bullish on next generation nuclear technologies.

Several are investigating the potential of locating their facilities near small modular nuclear reactors that could feed them power directly. Such technology is in its infancy and has not yet been approved by regulators. That isn’t stopping a company chaired by Microsoft co-founder Bill Gates from doubling down on it. The firm, called Terra Power, this year began construction at what it plans to be a small reactor site in site in Wyoming.

Microsoft is also pursuing power from nuclear fusion, a potentially abundant, cheap and clean form of electricity that scientists have been trying to develop for decades — and most say is still a decade or more away from generating electricity. Microsoft has signed a contract to purchase fusion energy from a start-up that claims it can deliver it by 2028.

correction

A previous version of this article misspelled the last name of Michigan Gov. Gretchen Whitmer. The article has been corrected.

[whats-a-human]

Tips on coping with homicidal ideation, no empathy necessary!

Unrelated to this blog's theme, but this is a very important topic. Everyone is welcome to interact. I wanted to post this long ago; it's hard to but I gotta help others and break the stigma around this too. I hope my wording is good enough.

I have struggled with homicidal ideation years ago, which you might call a type of intrusive thought. I rarely have any homicidal intrusive thoughts anymore and I've dealt with the underlying issue that caused them, so I believe I have overcome that problem.

So, here's a post to anyone struggling with this. Having a licensed therapist is better but I know that just like me, many of you can't have one.

Preparing for an episode

First of all, be neutral about your ideation: you aren't a horrible person and you aren't going to actually murder someone just because of it. Now, and that's really important too: do not normalize those thoughts. You aren't evil for having an illness, but it's still an illness that hurts you above all else, and can hurt others too. I learned this from an acquaintance and that was really helpful.

Now, have a support network. Friends, mental health groups, anything. You should have a safe space to talk about your experiences but you don't need to be "out" to everyone! You can just tell a friend something like "hey, sometimes my mental illnesses act up and I have episodes, when that happens I'll give you a heads up and we could do X" (like talking about a comfort topic, having you/your friend talk about your/their day, etc.) Find a safe way to avoid isolation!

Think of your triggers, make a list so you can avoid them and prepare for when you get triggered. Also list things that soothe you and things that give you a sense of power and control but don't harm you/others. The options are endless, like painting your nails, giving your hair a trim, customizing your phone/blog/etc, cooking, going for a walk, hobbies etc.

2. During an episode

The goal here would be averting your attention to something else, but that can't be forced.

So, you can always talk facts with your brain. If you did act on your urges, you'd be arrested, period. Minor or not. And as a mentally ill person, your time there and after prison would be double hell... compared to just not acting on the thought. If you've been arrested before I doubt you'd want to years on end there (or years on end again). What I also told myself was, "going to prison because of such lowly people isn't worth it". I was right and extra based.

Also why waste your time with murder plans when you can be thinking about Pokemon. Or anything else that brings you joy. Yes, thinking of Pokemon instead of murder plans is part of recovery and based as hell. Like, even if you aren't a fan, some of those critters are cute, right? And just like that, you're slowly averting your attention and the urges are quieting down.

3. Other important things

The biggest victim of my intrusive thoughts was me. Those I wanted to kill were my abusers and I didn't want to have those thoughts, even during episodes I hated that a part of me was into it.

But I would never accept a murderer as a part of myself. I refused to ever accept such path as a valid future for me. Those thoughts were a part of me, but they didn't need to be part of me FOREVER. And I proved myself right. I focused my strength and intelligence on RECOVERING and it was the right choice.

You may feel powerless just like I was. Then, give yourself a haircut, cook something, make art, customize your phone, watch a movie, go do anything that reassures you that YOU are in control of your life, not your abusers. Some things may not appear productive but they are nonetheless carving the way to a beautiful and FREE life. Your episodes will slowly become less and less frequent, and less intense.

Of course recovery isn't linear, it's not always pleasant or easy and you'll still have really bad times, but deciding to thread the path of recovery is a huge step of power in itself. Stay determined.

I still live with my abusers but I have worked so much with myself and whatever I could do within my reach, that the power I consider them to have over me is much, much smaller and that did wonders to me.

An extra reminder: some triggering things may feel kinda good or addictive, like doomscrolling or something that personally entertains your homicidal ideation instead of directing you away from it. For example, directing your violence towards fiction can be helpful but if engaging with/producing violent media entertains these thoughts about real life actions instead of being cathartic, that's a form of self-harm. I know it's addictive but try to look for alternatives! You can do it 💪

Once again, huge virtual hug for everyone 🫂 stay safe!

[iridescentpull]

Day one of Hideduo/FitPac Kiss Week – Kiss on the Cheek & Cat Café AU

[ Ao3 link ] [ Set in the GeR universe! ]

[ fic below cut ]

“Bem-vindo!” Pac chirped, finishing the cat latte art he was doing for the customer’s drink. His back was facing the door, so he couldn't see who had entered. “I’ll be with you in a moment!”

It was midday on a Tuesday, which meant it was a slow period for the café. There was only one customer in the café, an old lady who visited often to play with Coquinho. She always ordered a latte and let Pac practice his latte art with hers.

“Damn, Pac.” A familiar voice said from behind him, causing him to break into a grin. “No time to greet your boyfriend? I am wounded.”

Pac spun around, a smile stretching across his face. “Fitchi!” He cheered, quickly grabbing one of the small plates and placing the mug of latte on top of it. “I always have time for you.” He said, quickly walking towards the table were the customer was seated, leaving the drink and plate with her.

The old lady gave him a warm smile and mumbled a thanks, turning back to where she was playing with Coquinho. Pac smiled at them before turning to Fit, crossing his arms. “Aren’t you supposed to be at the gym now?” He asked, teasingly.

“U-Uh, well…” Stuttered the American, rubbing the back of his neck and looking everywhere except for Pac. “Is it a crime that I want to visit my Brazilian boyfriend during my break? It’s been sooooooo long.”

The shorter male laughed, shaking his head. “It’s only been two days–”

“Too long.” Fit interrupted, opening his arms and engulfing the other male in a hug. “I missed you.”

Ever since they got official, Fit liked to pop by the café whenever he had a break. At the start, he claimed it was to check how he was doing after recovery, but Pac knew he just wanted to see him. It was very endearing, and Pac found himself looking forward to those visits.

“You are so clingy.” Pac teased, but hugged back. “Missed you too, though.”

After a few seconds, the pair pulled back and Pac walked to one of the tables, grabbing the dirty mugs and plates that were left there. Fit followed, grabbing some more dishes.

“You know, I can clean all these by myself, right?” Asked Pac, rolling his eyes playfully as he walked towards the sink.

Fit hummed, following behind. “Of course I do.” He said, placing the dishes in the sink and wrapping an arm around the Brazilian’s waist. “But I would like to spend as much time as possible with my boyfriend, thank you very much.”

The black-haired male groaned in fake annoyance. “Fine.” He said, leaning closer and kissing the other’s cheek.

“Oh!” The other said, face turning a nice shade of red as Pac started to scrub the mugs. “That’s, um, nice. What is it for?”

The other male laughed, shaking his head as he finished washing the mug and set it aside. “No reason.” He said, smiling as he turned to look at Fit briefly. “Just felt like it.”

“Cool.” Fit said, still processing what happened. “Cool. Cool. Very cool. Yeah.”

Pac snorted, rinsing the last mug. “Very smooth, Fitchi.” He said, rolling his eyes. They’ve been dating for almost a year now, and Fit still got so shy whenever he showed affection. Pac loved how he could do very simple gestures, like kiss Fit’s cheek, give him a rose or hug him from behind and Fit would collapse like a Victorian lady at the sight of an ankle.

“Hush, you.” The taller male mumbled, cheeks a pretty shade of pink. “So, uh... what have you got planned for this weekend?”

“This weekend? Hm.” Pac hummed, drying the last of the mugs and setting it aside. “I think I was gonna spend it cleaning my house– Richas is staying with Felps and Niki is taking over the café this weekend."

“Really?” Fit asked, his face brightening. “Because, um, Ramón is having a sleepover at Dapper’s for the weekend and the house will be empty. I was wondering if you’d like to, uh, spend the weekend at mine?”

Now it was Pac’s turn to blush. “O-Oh. Of course.” He said, a smile spreading through his face. “That sounds great– I’ll be there.”

The American’s hazel eyes brightened, and a wide smile appeared on his face. “That’s... That’s great!” He said, trying to hide the excitement in his voice and failing miserably. “I can’t wait, it’ll be nice!"

Pac giggled, shaking his head at his boyfriend’s cuteness. “It’s settled, then.” He said, drying his hands and leaning closer. "I’ll come over on Friday after I close? So at ten?”

“That works for me.” Fit replied, pulling the other’s waist against his and pressing another kiss on his cheek. “Can’t wait.”

Pac laughed, heart so full he felt like he was about to burst. “Neither can I.” He said, before glancing at the clock on the wall. “Hey Fitch, your break ends in fifteen.”

“What?” Fit said, eyes widening and looking at the clock. “Shit. I’ll be late.” He said, letting go of Pac. “See you later?” He asked hopefully.

“See you later.” The other replied, smiling. “Go, or else you’ll get yelled at by Bagi. Again.”

The American pouted. “I’m her boss, though.” He mumbled.

Pac laughed. “Still.”

“Fine, fine.” Fit groaned, but turned around and walked towards the exit. “See you! Boa tarde!” He called, opening the door and stepping outside.

Pac rolled his eyes, but the smile remained on his lips. “Boa tarde, Fitch!” He said, before the bell rang again, signaling that Fit had left.

He couldn’t wait for Friday.

[tomtenadia]

Detours to you - 24

hello all,

as promised here we are with ch 24 and a lot of fluff... there is just a very very smidge of angst but it gets resolved quickly.

MASTERLIST

A month had elapsed and February had eventually arrived bringing with it more of the usual snow.

Rowan had slowly improved and with the help of physio he had worked hard to get better to his old form as fast as possible. He could now move around with two crutches but was still off work. Although he was much better the doctor had not cleared him for work, even if it was just desk duty. His deputy was covering for him at the moment and he hated that he was not allowed to do his job. During his recovery the mayor had eventually requested a visit and he Aelin and Maya had driven to city hall and the mayor had appointed him with the medal of valour that he had been promised. Rowan had been reticent and had explained that it was just his job, but the mayor believed that he deserved the accolade.

Maya had been super smug at the fact that her dad was a hero and had been telling all of her friends at school about him. His mum was still at their place and Eiddwen had been a great help while he was recovering and she had become an integral part of their family. Evalin and Eiddwen had quicly become as thick as thieves and both Aelin and Rowan were positive that their mothers were secretly planning something that concerned them. 

*

Rowan was bored at home. He was not used to being idle and was driving his mother crazy because he constantly wanted to help in the house. On top of that, Maya was at school so he had asked, no begged, Aelin to join her at the shop. 

Aelin had agreed and now he was happily sitting at the counter and his job was to take payments from customers. It was a brand new world to him. He knew how to deal with raging fires other type of catastrophes. He was not good with people. Rowan had almost strangled a woman who wanted to order a book but had no idea of the title or the author, but only knew that it had been released six months before and had a blue cover. He had explained to her that he needed a title and that blue was not a searching parameter but the woman was not listening to him. All of a sudden he had a total new respect for Aelin’s job.

Elide walked at his side “How are you coping?”

“Give me a five alarm fire, I can deal with it. Needy customers?” He shook his head “How do you ladies survive this?”

Elide laughed “we love this job.”

Rowan chuckled “Does Lorcan know you are a masochist?”

Lysandra and Aelin joined them a moment later and Aelin kissed his cheek “how’s our chief?

“Better now,” he sneaked an arm around her.

In that instant a tall blonde woman walked towards him “Hi,” she said in a very sensual way “I heard you give a good recommendation to another woman,” her hand moved on his on the counter “I am looking for a good book too.”

Rowan pulled the hand back “My colleagues here have far better knowledge than me.” He added while pulling Lys forward. 

Dejection fell on the woman’s face and Lysandra grabbed the woman, taking her away.

“Oh Rowan, you broke the woman’s heart,” joked Elide.

“Well, Lysandra knows more than me, it was only logical.”

Aelin hugged him again and hummed in his arms “I need to buy you a t-shirt reading property of Aelin Galathynius.”

Rowan looked Aelin in her blue eyes with a stare that said I am yours.

They were about to go back to their job when Eiddwen entered the shop and Rowan got ready. Because of the injury he sustained and the trauma he went through, the department had requested that he’d go through therapy. It was one of the conditions to allow him back to work.

“Hi Ro, ready for your appointment?”

He stood and grabbed his crutches. Aelin walked to him “are you coming back here then?”

“Yes, this is fun, albeit a bit scary.”

Aelin kissed him “Go,” a caress on his face “I will see you later.”

Rowan was in the car with his mum and was silent while driving.

“Ro, are you okay? Have you been sleeping?” She asked out of the blue.

He hadn’t. Rowan had a few bad nights when he woke up with the sensation of burning or suffocation. He then would roll around and hold Aelin in his arms. That would usually help him, her scent and the feeling of her body against his would always calm his soul. And if Maya joined in as well, he usually had the most blissful night. His girls were better than any medicine or therapy session. 

“I had a few bad nights.”

Her hand grabbed his “Mum, hand back on the wheel, please.”

“Is therapy working?”

“I think so. I just…” he paused “Mum, I almost left Aelin and Maya alone. I just found them again and I almost lost them. And it scared me, even more than the fire.” He explained “I know fire, but this fear, it hurts.”

“Maybe you should change job?” She asked.

“No mum, I was not meant to go inside. I did it because I knew the factory and it was the only way to save those people.” He told her “I usually stay outside and ran the fires, I can help change things. I love my job.”

“Talk to Aelin then, tell her how you feel.”

He was silent.

“Rowan, I know what not talking does to you.” Eiddwen was silent for an instant and let it sink in  “I had a panic attack one evening while I was at the supermarket. The police had to call uncle Ellys to come and get me. I kept saying that I was fine. I lied to myself until I broke down.”

Rowan grabbed his mother’s hand on the wheel and they both remained silent until they reached the building.

Eiddwen helped her son get out of the car and slowly walked to the office “I am running some errands in the meantime. I will see you in an hour.” Rowan nodded and followed the therapist inside the room. Therapy had been strange to him. He was not the greatest person to talk about his feelings and the first few days he had struggled to open up but slowly with the help of his therapist he had managed to finally unlock his emotions. They had covered about everything, not just his job.

“Welcome back, Rowan,” said Yrene while offering him to sit down “how are you you?”

A deep sigh “I love being back at home with my girls but I hate being stuck and not being allowed back to work. I am not good at feeling useless. I can work at a desk. This is nonsense.”

The woman nodded “you do know is department regulations?”

He groaned “Yes, I went through a serious accident and blah blah blah so now I have to wait for a shrink to tell me that I am fit to do my job.”     

“Rowan, you almost died and you have admitted that you have been struggling to sleep. That is not a good sign.”

“Of course, it friggin PTSD. I am working on it.”

“How?”

He looked outside of the window where the snow was falling heavily “Aelin and Maya, it’s all for them.”

The woman scribbled something down “what about you? Do you do it for yourself too?”

He snorted “of course, but they are my priority.”

“How is it going with them?”

Silence “I love my daughter. She is funny and intelligent and a little tornado. I adore teaching her things and discover almost every day new aspect of her personality.” He paused “I love Aelin and I want to be with her,” he nervously played with his hands “my mum gave me her engagement ring and wants me to give it to Aelin.”

“And how do you feel about it?”

He chuckled “I would have married her a long time ago. Now…”  a deep sigh “I love her madly but a part of me, a very small one, still resents her for lying and it’s affecting my full trust in her and driving me insane at the same time,” his hand raked through his longer hair “I love her so much and I really want to call her my wife. What’s wrong with me?”

“Have you talked to her? Have you voiced this problem to her?”

He shook his head “We have finally stopped fighting and Maya is thriving I cannot mess it up.”

Yrene wrote down a few more notes “that is a great progress, but this is something you have to discuss with Aelin or you risk that your relationship can never blossom properly,” she explained “She is also key in helping you deal with the job trauma. You need to talk to her.”

He nodded.

“What about sleeping? You mentioned in your last session your recurrent nightmares.”

A nod “Always the same. Burning, suffocation, the unyielding fear of being trapped. I usually wake up gasping for air.” His hand gently shook in his lap. 

“How have you been coping? Do you take the sleeping tablets the doctor prescribed?”

Rowan shook his head “Holding Aelin in my arms helps, and some night Maya jumps in bed too. Their presence keeps the bad dreams away and I can actually sleep.”

“Does it mean that without her you can’t sleep?”

“No, I can but it’s not as relaxed. I toss and turn a lot more.” A pause “It has always been like that. Aelin always managed to calm my soul.”  

The woman nodded. 

When the hour was up he said goodbye to Yrene and walked out of the office where his mother was waiting for him, reading a book. She looked up and closed the book “Ready to go?”

He nodded and slowly they made their way back to the car and the shop.

Later on that night, Rowan was already in bed, his back against the headboard and a book in his hands while Aelin was getting ready for the night. When they were dating she used to wear scandalous nightwear that would drive him insane with need and lust, now her nightwear was more modest and mostly consisted of his t-shirts that looked gigantic on her. A habit that apparently she had not lost. 

“That book seems interesting,” her voice reached him and he closed the book and placed it on the nightstand. Aelin smiled, it was a fantasy that she had recommended earlier on while at work.

“Oh yeah, this annoying bookseller badgered me all afternoon and convinced me to buy it.”

Aelin climbed in bed and crawled at his side “Well, she has great taste.”

Rowan looked at her and was about to kiss her but then he remembered he wanted to have a chat “So, therapy today was good.”

Aelin sat at his side and snuggled against his chest.

“We talked about us,” he looked down at her.

“I thought it was just about your job.”

He nodded “but Yrene is a wizard and we did some digging and we ended up talking about our relationship. She thinks it’s key to my recovery too.”

Aelin grinned proudly.

He was silent for a moment trying to find the best way to tell her his feelings without hurting her “she thinks that I need to reach closure before you and I can properly move to the next stage.”

Aelin turned to him “Closure?” Hurt in her voice “I thought we went over this.”

Rowan paused and folded his hands on his lap “Yes, but I think a part of me still resents you and I can’t shake it off.”

“Haven’t I apologised enough? What do you want me to do?” She growled irritated.

“I am working on it, it’s my issue, Aelin.”

Frustrated, Aelin got off the bed and started pacing the room “Is this an excuse to dump me once and for all?”

“No, Aelin. Yrene told me to express my feelings to you too and that’s what I am doing.”

“And blaming me in the process as usual.”

Rowan let out a frustrated growl “Fuck Aelin, I love you.”

“No you don’t.” She shouted back “If you did, you would finally trust me. How can we build a life together like this?”

She turned her back to him and sat at the bottom of the bed “I am tired of apologising, Rowan.” Her voice betrayed the sobs that had started to break through her “I don’t think we can do this if you continue in your crusade of hate towards me.”

He sighed and leaned back in the pillow “Aelin, I was ready to go to battle in court and I decided not to because I wanted to give our family a better chance,” he explained, looking away from her “but every time I find out something about Maya that happened a long time ago, I get so angry. I missed five years of my daughter’s life and it hurts, Aelin. It makes me feel like an incompetent father and it sting so much.” he paused “A while ago at hockey practice the other fathers had started talking about their kids and ended up chatting about their first day at school. I was silent, because I have no idea. I felt like a part time dad.”

Aelin finally turned and looked at his pained expression. On that he was right, he could have unleashed lawyers on her and instead of living together, they could have been in the middle of a destructive custody battle. He had backed down and given them a chance and for that she was grateful. Slowly she climbed back to him and her hand caressed his face tenderly “All the other kids were crying, but Maya wore her backpack and walked proudly inside the school and before leaving she told me that she was a big girl.” His arm sneaked behind her back pulling her closer and Aelin basked against his strong body.

He chuckled “Sounds like her.”

“I was almost offended when I picked her up and she told me she did not miss me.”

Aelin looked up at him and saw a hint of sadness on his features. She knew that having missed that part of their daughter’s life still upset him, but he was back and they had so much more to look forward to. She snuggled closer, letting him cage her completely against his chest “Ro, I know you missed a lot, but you still have so much to experience,” a kiss on his pecs “Aren’t you looking forward to her teenage phase? The first boyfriend or girlfriend?”

Rowan chuckled “Oh yes, the scary milestones.”

Her face turned upwards to look him into his eyes  “In your position, I’d be pissed too.”

Rowan’s nose landed on her head, buried in her mane of blonde hair “I am sorry, but I swear I am working on it.”

She kissed his cheek “I believe you, chief.”

Rowan pulled her down and let Aelin be the big spoon, her arms enveloping him, her face nestled in the crook of his neck “You are such a cuddler, aren’t you worried about your street cred?”

He hummed happily “Just with you and Maya. I am happy to keep my grumpy status with the rest of the world, but you two make me happy.”

Aelin smiled “good because we are not planning on leaving. We love your house too much.”

Rowan turned to face her and pulled her tight against him “To whatever end, fireheart.” A kiss.

“To whatever end.” She replied, then a smirk appeared on her face and pushed Rowan on his back and straddled him “Now, let’s see what can we do to make you sleep a bit better.” She removed her jersey and stood bared in front of him. She leaned closer for a kiss “I believe someone requested a sexy nurse.”

Rowan laughed and pillowed his arms behind his head.

“Let me take care of you, chief.” She added, while pulling of his briefs.

That night, with the love of his life in his arms, Rowan slept peacefully and dreamed of a future with the two most important people in his life.

taglist

@rowaelinismyotp @swankii-art-teacher @whimsicallyreading @elentiyawhitethorn @aelin-bitch-queen @bruiseonthefaceofhumanity  @mis-lil-red @thegreyj @sailorsassley @leiawritesstories @clairec79 @morganofthewildfire @sv0430 @heartless--aromantic @autumnbabylon @rowanaelinn  @susumaus98  @gracie-rosee @mybloodrunsblue @tanvee1231 @avenrebekah @whoever-you-choose-to-love  @theywillnotsingforme @universallytreepost @black-daisy-water @goddess-aelin @whispers-in-the-darkest-heart @lovely-dove-zee @athena127 @mariaofdoranelle