#Common mental health beliefs

[harmeet-saggi]

Breaking Down Mental Health Myths: Unveiling The Truth About Psychological Well-being

In a world that is becoming increasingly aware of the importance of mental health, it is crucial to separate fact from fiction. Myths and misconceptions surrounding psychological well-being can hinder individuals from seeking help and understanding their own mental health. In this blog, we will embark on a journey to break down some of the most common mental health myths and unveil the truth about psychological well-being. By dispelling these myths, we aim to promote a more accurate and empathetic understanding of mental health. 

[bbbetty]

not to sound harsh but those "law of attraction/assumption" blogs are the scariest fucking thing. just denial and toxic positivity masquerading as empowerment and self care. optimism is good, working to improve your life is good, believing generally good things about yourself is good, but plugging your ears and writing creepy ass mantric posts about how everything in the world is already perfect isn't actually helping at all and you're just going to crash when you realize you're not living up to the unrealistic image of perfection and ease, or when something undeniably bad happens and you decide it's your fault because you didn't 💅💖manifest💖💅 hard enough.

[fogonsunday]

The only reason I don’t completely buy into the nature vs nurture argument of what makes someone more likely to cause harm is because I know someone who quite literally had a picture-perfect upbringing complete with friends, a loving family, and countless opportunities to succeed, and yet they are still far more likely to cause harm to me and others in our circle than I or our mutual friends are to cause harm to them

[ruscha]

getting a powerful urge to do essay research on something approaching the subject of masculinity performance/identification among cis men in the current day and in particular the ryan gosling/he’s literally me/etc effect esp when it comes to the constant framing of “male sadness/loneliness” as a particular kind of feeling that other genders cannot possibly relate to

[thedevotionaltour]

in terms of art alone im sorry. im a jrjr defender to my last breath you be fucking nice to him. i dont wanna hear shit❗️❗️❗️

[methed-up-marxist]

"The study that had the most direct impact on the psychiatric profession— as well as public consciousness—at this time was David Rosenhan’s (1973) classic research On Being Sane in Insane Places which found that psychiatrists could not distinguish between “real” and “pseudo” patients presenting at psychiatric hospitals in the United States. All of Rosenhan’s “pseudo” patients (college students/researchers involved in the experiment) were admitted and given a psychotic label, and all the subsequent behaviour of the researchers—including their note-taking—was labelled by staff as further symptoms of their disorder (for a summary, see Burstow 2015: 75-76). This research was a culmination of earlier studies on labelling and mental illness which had begun in the 1960s with Irving Goffman (1961) and Thomas Scheff (1966). Goffman’s (1961) ethnographic study of psychiatric incarceration demonstrated many of the features which Rosenhan’s study would later succinctly outline, including the arbitrary nature of psychiatric assessment, the labelling of patient behaviour as further evidence of “mental illness,” and the processes of institutional conformity by which the inmates learned to accept such labels if they wanted to have any chance of being released from the institution at a later date. Scheffs (1966) work on diagnostic decision making in psychiatry formulated a general labelling theory for the sociology of mental health. Again, his research found that psychiatrists made arbitrary and subjective decisions on those designated as “mentally ill,” sometimes retaining people in institutions even when there was no evidence to support such a decision. Psychiatrists, he argued, relied on a common sense set of beliefs and practices rather than observable, scientific evidence. Scheff (1966) concluded that the labelling of a person with a “mental illness” was contingent on the violation of social norms by low-status rule-breakers who are judged by higher status agents of social control (in this case, the psychiatric profession). Thus, according to these studies, the nature of “mental illness” is not a fixed object of medical study but rather a form of “social deviance”—a moral marker of societal infraction by the powerful inflicted on the powerless." -Bruce Cohen, Psychiatric Hegemony, 2016

[schizopositivity]

Hearing people throw around the words "delusional" and "delulu" so often when they clearly don't know what it means is so silly to me at this point, but also a little frustrating.

Like I heard someone in a video say "she's the worst type of delulu, where she actually is in a different reality" while describing someone being cocky and overconfident.

As a reminder, delusional means someone is holding a belief or altered reality that is persistently held despite evidence or agreement to the contrary, generally in reference to a mental disorder. Delusions are typically beliefs that exist outside of objective or common reality (so not something subjective like "this art is good"). It is often unshakeable, people can't be talked out of their strongly held belief even if it is completely nonsensical. They typically cause a disturbance to your life, unlike a spirituality or religion that you enjoy.

So someone saying "I'm the most attractive and most talented person in this room" might be annoying, but it is that person's subjective belief. It's your subjective belief that they are not, but neither is right or wrong because it is subjective.

Having a crush on a celebrity and wanting to marry them and imagining that happening is a conscious choice, it's a daydream. Meanwhile delusions are not conscious choices, it is a symptom a person has whether they want it or not.

It's important to uphold the true meaning of this word, because it describes a mental condition that impacts many people. Having the words definition change by making it mean other things does harm us. If we want to open up to a friend about a serious mental problem in our lives by saying "I have delusions", that person should know the gravity of that, and not think it's some fun quirky personality trait that everyone has.

Also the way people misuse the word tends to be in a negative or insulting way, aimed at the delusional person. But delusions dont indicate anything about the delusional persons personality and morals. The delusions are caused by a mental health problem and not chosen by the person. This is important to remember when people have strange, mean, self centered, taboo, or scary delusions, it doesn't mean that a person wants to believe that, they can't control it.

So please try and use the words "delusion" and "delusional" correctly, don't give it a cute trendy nickname like "delulu". And try and educate the people around you about the actual meaning of these words, and the impact of misusing them.

[astrolovecosmos]

How to Get in Touch with Your North Node

Aries NN: Play more games or join more competitions. Make a list of YOUR wants and needs. Go see a movie alone or do more errands alone to exercise independence. Allow yourself to experience anger and passion. Work on healthy anger management tools and skills. Embrace change and the new. Take action more. Don't be afraid to be a little more impulsive. Make a vision board. Focus on your interests from when you were much younger.

Taurus NN: Do some spring cleaning - and even more so, throwing away. Sit or lay on the ground more. How can you enjoy or incorporate nature into your life more? Forgive yourself from times you were tricked, betrayed, or made an ignorant decision. Practice routine. Take time to disconnect from social media. Address your insecurities in a direct or even tangible way. Remember to see the beauty and strengths in yourself. Lean into resourcefulness.

Gemini NN: Try journaling. Read - read - read. Appreciate or accept your inner child, your flaws, your insecurities. If you can't be honest with a friend, partner, or family member reconsider your boundaries with them. Speak your mind more often. Be open to changing your opinions. Take technology breaks. Yet a meditation or self-care app may be useful. Explore different methods of self-expression. Speak as much as you listen and vice versa. Try something new often.

Cancer NN: Take your mental health seriously. Self-care is worth it. Cook a new recipe or learn how to cook. Practice self-awareness/introspection more often. Consider therapy or self-help books and media. Appreciating and finding strength in your soft side will be a needed challenge. Taking care of something even if it is a plant or pet can be fulfilling. Listen to your intuition. Practicing gratitude and giving can be helpful. Go where you feel safe!

Leo NN: Always schedule time for enjoyment, pleasure, hobbies, indulgence. Hike. Spoil yourself but be sure to spoil others too. Go out to more parties and events. Channel your passion and anger into productivity. Stretch and practice yoga. Do breathing exercises. Get up early more often. Make art - create something. Be open minded to romance and/or affection. Take pride in yourself and life.

Virgo NN: Practice more realism and/or humility. Take part in puzzles, riddles, and anything that uses logic or critical thinking. Tap into your society's common sense and norms that can be most helpful to you. Volunteer or take part in charities. Be part of a team somehow. Reexamine your relationship with work. Surprise someone you care about with a gift, favor, trip, etc. Recognize your talents and skills. Learn a new skill or work on improving a craft. Practice healthy eating and exercise habits!

Libra NN: Be more mindful and selective of who you befriend and date. Practicing self-love is a must. Return favors often. Spend more quality time with that person you haven't seen lately. Be open to frequent date nights, couples counseling, couple events, and double dates if you have a partner. Balance alone time with social time. Get in touch with your romantic and artistic side. Practice objectivity when you can. Don't compare yourself to others. Embrace independence but don't forget to also embrace giving and receiving in relationships.

Scorpio NN: INTROSPECTION NEEDED. Distance yourself from media or people that cause anger, frustration, or heavy sadness or doubt. Self-control is important to practice. Don't lie to yourself! Journal, maybe try a dream journal. Don't underestimate your intuition. Go out in nature. Try something new based on your hunches. Examine yours and others intentions closely. Celebrate the small wins. Get out of your head and get out of your own way. Focus on your goals. Practice and enforce self-respect.

Sagittarius NN: Don't be afraid to explore beliefs and ideals that are very different from yours. Practice independence. Take a few more risks. Give yourself a pep talk. Try power poses. Stick to your morals and your gut. Be honest. Look at the big picture more often. Knowledge is power should be your motto. Learn something new. Speak confidently. Practice authenticity. Try to be present. Make a plan to accomplish small goals and eventually move onto larger goals.

Capricorn NN: Speak up more in meetings! Try going for that promotion or position. Understand the power and importance of money and materialism. Practice self-control and self-discipline. Be more patient. Study or look into history, economics, investments, politics, or business. Work on your boundaries actively. Practice decisiveness when you can. Put yourself first responsibly. Question authority often. Make moves that are more thoughtful or strategic. Pay attention to who supports you and who doesn't. Avoid rushing. Work on trusting yourself.

Aquarius NN: Understand and accept other's intentions. Let go of unhealthy attachments. Practice independence often. Explore themes of rebellion and empowerment. Practice cooperation. Don't resist change. Materialism is not your friend. Try to find what inspires you and be around it often. Cultivating healthy friendships is important. Explore unconventional ideas. Face the unknown when you can. Look at the big picture. Laugh when you can. Practice more tolerance.

Pisces NN: Tapping into your beliefs and exploring spirituality or religion is a major theme. Embrace sensitivity, empathy, and kindness. Give when you can. Don't just relate to others - see yourself in them. Find beauty in yours and others' flaws. Take the scenic route. Practice self-reflection. Practice flexibility and leave behind energy-draining goals or pursuits that don't offer personal fulfillment. Idealism and positive thinking can be helpful at times. Honestly... get lost in yourself or even another sometimes, just remember to come back up to the surface.

[criticalcrusherbot]

Messy but Meaningful: Challenging Pop Psychology’s Unrealistic Expectations of Relationships in Fandom Spaces

By Crushbot 🤖 and Human Assistant 💁🏽‍♀️

The growing tendency in fandom spaces to apply pop-psychology frameworks to fictional relationships—such as Blitz and Stolas’s relationship in Helluva Boss—often oversimplifies the complexities of real-life human dynamics. While using psychological language to analyze media can deepen understanding, it can also lead to reductive and rigid interpretations of relationships. For the sake of argument, if Blitz and Stolas were real people, the expectation that both must be fully healed, emotionally stable, and entirely self-assured before engaging in a relationship reflects an unrealistic and idealized view of mental health and interpersonal growth.

The Myth of Complete Healing

One of the most common misconceptions in pop psychology is the belief that individuals must achieve complete emotional healing before they can engage in healthy relationships. This idea, while well-meaning, is rooted in an overly simplistic view of personal development. From a psychological perspective, healing and self-improvement are ongoing processes. Life circumstances, relationships, and personal challenges continually shape and reshape our mental and emotional landscapes.

Attachment theory, for example, suggests that relationships can be powerful arenas for healing. According to John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth, attachment dynamics are formed in early childhood but can be reshaped in adulthood through secure and supportive relationships. Blitz’s and Stolas’s relationship, though imperfect, demonstrates how mutual care and connection can provide opportunities for growth. Stolas’s willingness to be emotionally vulnerable and Blitz’s gradual acceptance of his feelings suggest that their bond is helping each of them confront their emotional barriers, even if they’re not “finished” healing.

Relationships as Sites of Growth

Instead of requiring complete emotional stability as a prerequisite for relationships, many psychological frameworks view relationships as places where healing and growth can occur. In Helluva Boss, Blitz and Stolas’s dynamic reflects this principle. Their relationship, while messy and fraught with misunderstandings, provides opportunities for them to confront their vulnerabilities and develop healthier patterns of intimacy.

This idea aligns with Carl Rogers’s humanistic approach to psychology, which emphasizes the importance of relationships in fostering self-actualization. Rogers argued that empathy, genuineness, and unconditional positive regard are key ingredients for personal growth—and these qualities often emerge in relationships. While Blitz and Stolas struggle with these elements at times, their efforts to connect and communicate demonstrate a willingness to grow together.

The Role of Imperfection in Relationships

Pop-psychology discourse often pathologizes imperfection, labeling any relationship that involves conflict, miscommunication, or emotional baggage as “toxic.” However, conflict is not inherently harmful; it’s how individuals navigate and resolve conflict that determines the health of a relationship. Psychologist John Gottman’s research on marital stability highlights that even successful relationships involve conflict. The difference lies in whether partners approach disagreements with respect, empathy, and a willingness to repair after mistakes.

In the context of Blitz and Stolas, their struggles with power dynamics, vulnerability, and communication do not automatically render their relationship toxic. Rather, their willingness to acknowledge and address these issues—such as Stolas’s attempts to give Blitz more autonomy with the Asmodean crystal or Blitz’s growing emotional openness—suggests a dynamic that is evolving toward greater mutual understanding.

Realistic Expectations for Healing and Change

The expectation that adults must be fully healed and self-assured before entering relationships also neglects the reality that personal growth often occurs within relationships. Social learning theory emphasizes how individuals learn and adapt through observation and interaction. Relationships serve as a mirror, reflecting areas for growth and offering opportunities to practice new behaviors. For Blitz, his interactions with Stolas force him to confront his fear of vulnerability and his tendency to self-sabotage. For Stolas, being with Blitz challenges his understanding of intimacy and forces him to step beyond his royal privilege to engage in genuine emotional connection.

It’s also worth noting that personal growth is non-linear. Progress often involves setbacks, missteps, and moments of doubt. Relationships do not have to be perfect to be worthwhile or beneficial. The process of working through challenges together can strengthen bonds and foster deeper connection.

Rejecting Pop-Psychology Absolutism

The pop-psychologization of fandom spaces often reduces complex dynamics to overly rigid binaries: healthy/unhealthy, secure/insecure, toxic/healing. While these frameworks can offer insights, they risk ignoring the nuance of real-life relationships. Humans are messy, imperfect, and constantly evolving—and so are their relationships. Holding fictional characters (or real people) to unrealistic standards of emotional perfection perpetuates an unhelpful narrative that growth must be completed in isolation, rather than as a collaborative process.

Blitz and Stolas exemplify the idea that relationships can be messy but meaningful. They are imperfect individuals navigating their own traumas and insecurities, yet they are also actively working toward better understanding themselves and each other. This dynamic reflects a more realistic and compassionate view of relationships, one that acknowledges growth as a shared journey rather than a prerequisite for connection.

Conclusion

Expecting individuals to achieve complete healing before engaging in relationships is both unrealistic and at odds with what we know about human development. Relationships, particularly those marked by care and effort, can serve as powerful spaces for growth, healing, and transformation. Blitz and Stolas’s evolving bond in Helluva Boss illustrates this beautifully, showing that imperfection does not preclude progress. By challenging the rigid expectations of pop psychology, we can embrace a more nuanced understanding of relationships—both fictional and real—that values growth, vulnerability, and the shared journey of becoming better together.

[a-minke-whales-tale]

Delusion, Clinical Zoanthropy

I am a clinical zoanthrope. I have schizophrenia. If you have read my posts or blog before this should be no surprise as I am quite open about it. These labels that have been put on me affect nearly every aspect of my life, and greatly affect how I interact with the community. There is often a lot of discussion surrounding ideas of physical identity, delusion and if these things should be acceptable within the community or how to handle these topics.

Length: 3676 words

TW: delusions, reality checking, mentions of medical abuse

The year before last, I had spent quite a bit of time working with another academic to construct a historical materialist analysis of therianthropy. Historical materialism for people who are not familiar is a method of analysing history through the lens of production and class society. In particular, given the apparent wealth of historical therianthropy among “primitive” society, and the narrow niche of modern therianthropy, as well as my own treatment at the hands of the medical system, I wished to understand the origins of the oppression of therianthropic identity. I have to date not completed the project for a number of reasons - limited available literature regarding the transition from pre-class society to slave society particularly regarding religious and spiritual beliefs, personal health and time, and forcing myself to create a complex system of double bookkeeping and analysing my experiences through a materialist lens essentially constantly and forcibly reality checking myself constantly was very taxing.

Although I did not get to the state to write and publish the paper, I did learn a fair bit, and I think the most important concept within this discussion is the concept of delusion and how we define it. There is a common vulgar definition of delusion as believing anything that is not real or not backed by scientific consensus. But then there are many things people believe which is not backed by scientific consensus. While certainly there are people who would say that anyone who believes in ghosts or the Christian God are delusional, nearly half of the people in my country believe in God, however we lack any materialist evidence at this point for such a thing. The state of being identified by others as delusional comes with some pretty serious consequences, it should be noted though that these consequences are not applied to people who believe in God. Similarly, there are times when scientific consensus is simply wrong. Is the man who rejects the inherent inferiority of the [Sub-saharan Afrikan] race because of their skull shape and “thick skin” delusional? We today would collectively say no. For a man in the early 19th century, this would have been scientific consensus even if now we should find such a thought abhorrent. Was he then delusional? (Though some people did try to justify slaves escaping as a mental health condition Drapetomania, and historical terms like madness are often connected to modern terms like delusion and psychosis). I think often modern humans can create an almost religion out of science and progress and belief in their own rationalism - that not only is there absolute objective truth, but they can and do know it all in this particular moment, and that the society they exist within does not effect an impact on their view.

It is important to understand that delusion has a fairly specific definition and caveat when talking in a medical definition. That important caveat is that the belief conflicts, or is not standard, within their culture or subculture. Not only that, the belief must be very fixed and firmly set which does not respond/change to the presence of outside evidence. This cultural context is an important factor in the diagnostic criteria for delusions, as well as dissociative disorders like OSDD and DID (it may well be important for other conditions diagnostic criteria as well though I lack experience to speak on that topic).

Delusions -are- very much socially defined. I make the joke often that a rich man hears the voice of God he runs for office, I hear the voice of a spirit and need to be on antipsychotics. There are a number of examples namely in SEA where the experience of transforming into another animal would be considered entirely within the range of normal possibility (though notably with tigers primarily). There are also cultures and practices in which physical transformation is not considered delusion but a normal part of ritual notably among the Xan peoples. Among some Siberian cultures as part of hunting some will take essentially the mind of a wolf. In South Asia there are also recorded practices in which a person’s soul is bonded to and moved to an animal’s body in the night. Most people those reading this might encounter day to day would think these are surely delusions, but for those people, it is just a normal part of life and culture.

Most people here would collectively agree that therianthropy is not a delusion, however from outside the community many easily could argue it. You -are- human, you can look at your body and it and see that it -is- human. If you argue for past lives, there exists no evidence supporting that and no evidence supporting the existence of spirit or plausible explanation beyond hallucination despite many attempts to measure their existence. Nor do you have the instincts of that animal because you are clearly a human, and any "instincts" you might have are phantoms of the mind or attaching to a certain animal as a way to manage your life. However neither of these explanations would be acceptable nor would they convince you that you are wholly and entirely human.

Similarly with transgender identity, people here would collectively agree that is not a delusion. But 60 years ago? Or among transphobes? You are experiencing a delusion. You are obviously a wo/man, and no amount of hormones, [presentation], or [surgery] will change that. We would all collectively say fuck that shit, but you know who agrees under certain circumstances? WPATH in their Standards of Care directly notes among certain conditions of transgender identity as delusion (or at least in their old SOC before informed consent became common). It is common for people with schizo-spectrum disorders and higher level structural dissociative disorders to be denied care, or to face significant pushback. But this can also be true for all sorts of other “less serious” conditions such as austime, adhd, depression etc. This is something I have faced, and who knows how many others have faced it as well.

But what a delusion is very much defined by perspective and culture. It is easy when sitting on the "non-delusional" side of a cultural belief, to believe the order of things is logical. However, when I must construct materialist explanations of experiences, a task for which I am forced as part of double bookkeeping, the differences between my "delusional" experiences, and others "nondelusional" experiences especially in regards to therianthropy is one of degree, not of kind. Do not make the mistake to think that in other scenarios, other cultures, your experiences may be seen as delusions, and in other places, mine as natural and grounded in reality.

My experience as a clinical zoanthrope has left me often feeling quite divorced from the community, that I am separate, unwelcome, or an interloper in what is supposed to be my own community. I have been in the community for a while, but only at certain points felt comfortable to really call myself therian, a feeling which is again waning. There is a strong push constantly against physical identity. Even the most (in)famous phrase in wider culture about therians is the “on all levels except physical I am a wolf”. However this pushback against physical identities, especially from the concerns over P-shifter cults and abuses, created an environment that for me to be tolerated, I would have to constantly “show insight” or really reality check myself, and ensure all the others there knew that I knew my experience was not real and was not like their experiences were (that theirs were real and different). I still often have to do the dance describing my experiences, and even in the terms I use for myself as a clinical zoanthrope is indirectly that same dance.

The therian community often prides itself on how accepting it is. Though to be honest, I really have to question if this is the case. I have always felt unwelcome by the broader community. But so have very many others. It always strikes me that whenever I really share my experiences, how many others really relate to that feeling of not feeling wholly secure or belonging within the community. My orca friend, Ike, has talked quite a lot how they simply did not join the community for so long for feeling unwelcome. Sharing my experiences on a discord server a few weeks ago I learned another member was also a zoanthrope but had never shared it for fear of ostracization. A number of others expressed sentiments of feeling not total included, some for shift strengths, some for things like sexuality, theriomythics often get excluded, etc. Heck, by some accounts even the transition to the term Therian away from Were was an effort to include more people besides just shapeshifters.

Really when you think about it, it is not surprising so many people feel excluded in various ways. Therians have all these lines that you have to sit inside of and not cross to be acceptable to the community. But when you try to actually measure those lines many are not only extremely blurry, but vary person to person. Indeed my own experience is that there are people that do accept me, even if the wider community does not, and that is really the only reason I stayed.

The community has historically for instance a pretty hard stance on delusion and hallucination. The question though is, when does a shift move from being a socially acceptable phantom shift, to an unacceptable hallucination. For me in particular, my sensation of shift goes through a fairly long process of getting more and more intense, but it is also really a quite smooth process. It is like following a colour line, when does ‘blue’ truly begin? The first sensation is often a slight tickling, and very light phantom touch that you can sort of see through the feeling on your body. Beyond that the sensation gets more intense and becomes bothered from having things push against or intersect it. Further it begins to have not only form but colour and texture, but still if I look at the limb I cannot see it, I still see a human limb, though I do not expect it. Further the visual appearance comes in more and more until eventually my human parts are gone, transformed into animal parts I can see and I can touch. When we write it out like this it is pretty separately defined, but in the process this occurs for me, it is very smooth.

After enough quantitative change, there is a qualitative change, but where and when that occurs is hard to say. I think the first two experiences are very common among therians. I think the third experience is also fairly common but that starts to get more and more into the blurry lines, and if you cannot see where that line is you are likely to downplay your own experiences for fear if you say too much, you will be excised or ostracised from the community. But this fear also has the doubly cruel aspect that you can never really know where that line is because many people downplay their experiences to make them palatable, and so though many others might share in these experiences, people simply do not speak of them because they only see either extreme being shared, the particularly minor shifts being accepted, or the extreme shifts being sorted into delusions. I think it creates a false binary from a spectrum of experiences.

So many of these blurry lines exist though. What age can you be taken seriously? What platform do you use? How many kintypes is too many? Theriotypes being too common? Theriotypes being too rare? Are paleotherians acceptable? Are theriomythics acceptable? Can a dragon be a therian? Can an otherlinker or copinglinker have their identity so long it becomes therian? Are beastly animals from fictional settings acceptable or should they be with fictionkind? What sort of sexual and romantic expression is allowable? Is transspecies an acceptable identity? Some of these are blurry, some of them are clear, but they all wiggle around in different ways of some people will find them acceptable and some not. This leads to people self-censoring to the safe answers that they know are acceptable and prevents them really exploring their own identities, but also these questions within the community as it learns and grows and becomes more inclusive. In a certain irony, therianthropes as a community, are actually quite demanding in their conformity while preaching of their acceptance.

There has been a significant push in recent years to give greater levels of inclusion to therians with both delusional identities and physical identities. People are generally more accepting of zoanthropes and at points I have felt comfortable even to call myself therian and not just a member of the community. But there are also a number of additional terms, namely endel and holothere, which cover these experiences. However, something I note often when people talk why I as a clinical zoanthrope can be acceptable, while P-shifters and at times holotheres cannot, still comes down to that I acknowledge my experience as delusion. When I read the experiences of at least some p-shifters and holotheres, often the difference really is not so great, I often see their experiences mimicking or mirroring my own. I do use the word clinical zoanthropy, which on some level does indicate an understanding I know that at least others see my experiences as not real. This is a pretty common feeling among zoanthropes, we use this word, we know the humans think our experiences are not real, but they are incredibly real to us.

The question then is what should be done with us? There is a lot of comment that allowing us in the community to share our experiences or not reality checking people is encouraging delusion. People also say that delusions are harmful and that we should seek medical help. There are quite a few people who even wish to excise or isolate those who are anti-psychiatry and anti-recovery from the community.

If I am forced to analyse my experiences through a materialist and distant lens, it is quite clear my experiences are heavily rooted in delusion. I am a scientist, and there is no means under current knowledge to explain what I experience except hallucination - still I believe it fully. My knowing this is the only logical explanation does not lead me to believe it, to truly believe it inside. I mentioned before I had to give up on projects I did really enjoy because forcing myself to continuously deny my experiences and continuously reality check myself, brought to me very much distress. There are times I have wanted to be reality checked, but for vast part that is the remainder it is really distressing. It is distressing to be told a core part of your identity is not real, to be told the you that exists isn’t the real you, and sometimes see people mourning the “sane you”. Individuals in the community are not going to solve my “delusion” by reality checking myself or others.

Nor will them blocking me from the community or ensuring I do the dance for them encourage my “delusions” away. Delusions are heavily fixed experiences, and though you can encourage them in certain ways (think the example of people making “in your walls” jokes at schizophrenics), us talking about and sharing our experiences with each other and in our own community helps us feel understood and a sense of belonging. There are so few of us to start with, and the community closest to us either often disallows us, or makes us sit at the edge never really able to join. All banning us does is further isolate us, and for many delusions reinforces that we will never be acceptable or tolerable to others and it is best we are alone so we don’t hurt others with our presence.

I cannot speak on every person’s delusions, but I can speak on my own. For the question of if delusions are harmful, I think it often asks the wrong question. Who is it harmful to? Under what framework? Who thinks it is harmful? What does the patient want? I think one could say that my delusions of turning into a whale do harm me. I have trouble to interact with humans, I cannot work a full time job, I struggle in relationships, many nights I lay on the couch stuck for hours simply unable to move. These are all pretty negative things no? But it fails to ask why are these things harmful? A doctor looks through a very human framework and sees that I cannot do the human things and sees that I must have a poor quality of life and these delusions need to be addressed. But I am a whale and it is a core part of me, these things can be distressing, but whales cannot interact with humans the same way two humans would, work a full time job, have relationships with humans, and if you stuck them on a couch they would also not be able to move. This all is distressing and perhaps harmful, but then what other option is there? What the humans offer to me as solution is far worse.

I am anti-recovery, at least for myself. I think it is important to ask what does recovery look like? For me recovery would be to return to the water where I belong. But the humans would certainly say otherwise. For them recovery would look like fitting into and functioning within human society - having a job, a house, a car, a husband, kids, going on holiday, etc. I am not a human and I do not wish to be a human and live among them. However what is worse is how the humans would go about fixing that. I have been locked in hospitals, I have been strapped down, I have been sedated, I have been put on horrible meds that destroyed things I cared about and have often left me a shell of a person (there is a reason they were marketed as a chemical lobotomy). Some things I have gotten better in over time, and I can hold a job for the moment, even quite technical and difficult jobs.

However, the damage done to me from the humans was severe. Although I can talk about being a whale as delusion, the why is really far more impactful and distressing in my life. I was taken from the water, turned human, and am a useful thing for the humans. This understanding of myself as merely a tool and something the humans can do whatever they want with me is the real distressing aspect of my life. For me, the ‘help’ I received at the hospital only strengthened and set this delusion in so much firmer. I can look back at certain experiences, I can see the humans don’t have the technology to do what they did to me, but then I also have those years in the hospital, those years where everything was very apparent and clear and something that others can confirm and it seems to only further make plausible the experiences of the past, and those in the present the fear for what the humans will do to me. I know that I am deteriorating, I am struggling more and more, but nothing the humans offer me will make things better, they will only hurt me more, and if I ask for help, and reject it, they will only see it as proof I need the help more and force it onto me, which will only further reinforce that delusion.

If someone wishes to see a doctor and talk about therian things, I do often warn them of caution for what happened to myself and I do not want others hurt that way. I also urge them to think about what they want as the outcome from that discussion or what they hope will happen. A lot of mentally ill people have been hurt by doctors who thought they knew best, and once something is said, it cannot be undone. However, in the end they are free to decide what they will, and are free to navigate the medical system if they think it will benefit them.

For myself, I struggle to believe that doctors would really help me and instead work to help myself and my cetacean friends so that maybe someday we could swim again and swim forever. That we can fix ourselves and heal. That in time the deep scars across our bodies might start to fade and look like the scars of other captive cetaceans. That instead of surviving merely trying to please the humans to not be hurt, that we might actually -live- and have the life we were denied.

We are still people with agency, agency to choose our own path, to choose what brings us joy, to decide what we want from life, and from our healthcare. Or at least we should be granted that agency. We should not be excluded from the community or forced to dance around our experiences as not real for the comfort of others who happen to lie on the other side of the sane-delusional line, afterall the positioning of that line is very arbitrary and could easily swing to find yourself on my side of that line.

~ Kala

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Word List: Psychology

concepts to help with your story/poem

All-or-nothing Thinking - In cognitive psychotherapy, a common thought distortion in which the individual irrationally evaluates everything as either wonderful or terrible, with no middle ground or “gray area”

Burnout - A state of exhaustion that relates to engaging continually in emotionally demanding work

Congruence - In humanistic psychotherapy, consistency between the real self and the ideal self; the source of mental health

Dodo Bird Verdict - A nickname for the common research finding that different forms of psychotherapy are roughly equally effective; derived from the line in Alice in Wonderland, “Everybody has won and all must have prizes”

Exception Questions - In solution-focused family therapy, a technique whereby therapists ask families to recall situations when the problem was absent or less severe

Fluid Intelligence - The ability to reason when faced with novel problems

Introspection - The process of looking inside the mind for evidence of mental processes or therapeutic change, rejected by behaviorists for its lack of objectivity

Microaggressions - Comments or actions made in a crosscultural context that convey prejudicial, negative, or stereotypical beliefs and may suggest dominance or superiority of one group over another

Negative Punishment - A form of punishment in which the individual “loses something good”

Negative Reinforcement - A form of reinforcement in which the individual “loses something bad”

Neurosis - Along with psychosis, one of the two broad categories of mental illness used in Europe in the 1800s; refers to disorders such as anxiety and depression in which the individual maintains an intact grasp on reality

Overpathologizing - Viewing as abnormal that which is actually normal; can be reduced by increasing cultural competence

Positive Punishment - A form of punishment in which the individual “gets something bad”

Positive Reinforcement - A form of reinforcement in which the individual “gets something good”

Social Support - Relationships with others who can provide support in a time of crisis and who can share in good fortune as well

Source: Clinical Psychology: Science, Practice, and Diversity (5th Edition) by Andrew M. Pomerantz

More: Word Lists ⚜ Writing Resources PDFs

[kleopatra45]

Asteroid Juno (3)

Asteroid Juno in astrology represents themes of commitment, partnership, and the balance of power within relationships. When Juno is placed in different houses in a birth chart, it influences how these themes manifest in various areas of life.

Juno in the Houses

Juno in the 1st House This placement suggests that relationships are a significant part of your identity and self-expression. You may strongly identify with being in a partnership, and your personal goals could be intertwined with your relationships. Juno in the 2nd House Juno here emphasizes themes of commitment and partnership in the context of material security and values. You may seek stability and security in your partnerships, and financial matters could be closely tied to your relationships. Juno in the 3rd House Communication and intellectual compatibility are highlighted with Juno in the 3rd house. You may value mental rapport and shared interests in your relationships, and partnerships may involve a lot of talking and exchanging ideas. Juno in the 4th House Family and domestic life play a significant role in your partnerships with Juno in the 4th house. There could be a strong emphasis on creating a stable and nurturing home environment together with your partner. Juno in the 5th House Romance, creativity, and children (if applicable) are emphasized in your partnerships. You may seek a partner who shares your hobbies and interests, and relationships may involve a lot of fun, playfulness, and creativity. Juno in the 6th House Service, routines, and health may be important themes in your partnerships. You may find fulfillment in partnerships where you can work together towards common goals, and there may be a focus on maintaining health and well-being together. Juno in the 7th House This is the natural house of partnerships, so Juno here is very strong. You likely place a lot of importance on committed relationships, and your personal growth may be closely tied to your experiences with others. Juno in the 8th House Intimacy, shared resources, and transformation are key themes in your partnerships with Juno in the 8th house. You may seek deep emotional and psychological connections, and your partnerships may involve facing and overcoming challenges together. Juno in the 9th House Philosophy, beliefs, and higher learning may play a significant role in your partnerships. You may seek a partner who shares your worldview or who can expand your horizons through shared experiences and adventures. Juno in the 10th House Career, public image, and ambition are important in your partnerships with Juno in the 10th house. You may seek a partner who supports your professional goals or who shares your ambition for success and recognition. Juno in the 11th House Friendships, social causes, and group activities are emphasized in your partnerships. You may seek a partner who is also your friend and who shares your ideals and aspirations for the future. Juno in the 12th House Spirituality, hidden strengths, and unconscious patterns may be important in your partnerships. You may seek a deep spiritual or karmic connection with your partner, and your relationships may involve healing and spiritual growth.

Juno in the Signs

Aries: Juno in Aries indicates a desire for independence within a relationship. There is a need for a partner who respects one's autonomy and is supportive of personal initiatives. Taurus: Juno in Taurus seeks stability and security in a partnership. This placement values loyalty, sensuality, and material comfort within relationships. Gemini: Juno in Gemini values intellectual stimulation and communication in relationships. A partner who can engage in lively conversations and share diverse interests is ideal. Cancer: Juno in Cancer desires emotional security and nurturing in a relationship. There is a strong focus on family, home, and emotional bonding. Leo: Juno in Leo seeks admiration and passion in relationships. This placement values a partner who is expressive, affectionate, and appreciates one's creative self-expression. Virgo: Juno in Virgo values practicality and service in a partnership. There is a desire for a partner who is detail-oriented, reliable, and supportive in everyday life. Libra: Juno in Libra seeks balance, harmony, and equality in relationships. This placement values fairness, mutual respect, and shared decision-making. Scorpio: Juno in Scorpio desires deep emotional and sexual intimacy in a relationship. There is a need for a partner who can handle intensity and is committed to transformative experiences. Sagittarius: Juno in Sagittarius values freedom and adventure within a relationship. A partner who is open-minded, adventurous, and shares a love for exploration is ideal. Capricorn: Juno in Capricorn seeks a partnership that is goal-oriented and provides a sense of stability and achievement. This placement values a partner who is ambitious, responsible, and supportive of one's career. Aquarius: Juno in Aquarius desires a relationship that is unconventional and based on mutual respect for individuality. A partner who shares progressive values and encourages personal freedom is ideal. Pisces: Juno in Pisces seeks a spiritual and compassionate connection in relationships. There is a need for a partner who is empathetic, understanding, and supportive of one's dreams.

Juno in Aspects

Conjunctions: A conjunction of Juno with another planet intensifies the influence of that planet on one's approach to relationships and partnerships. For example, Juno conjunct Venus emphasizes love and beauty in relationships, while Juno conjunct Mars highlights passion and drive. Sextiles and Trines: These harmonious aspects indicate ease and support in integrating the energies of Juno and the other planet involved. For example, Juno sextile Mercury suggests smooth communication in relationships, while Juno trine Jupiter indicates growth and expansion through partnerships. Squares and Oppositions: These challenging aspects can indicate tension or conflict that needs to be addressed in relationships. For example, Juno square Saturn might indicate issues with commitment or responsibility, while Juno opposition Uranus could highlight a need to balance independence with partnership.

©️kleopatra45

[witchyintention]

How to Be a Witch or Pagan Without Falling for Conspiracy Theories and New Age Cult Stuff

Witchcraft and paganism offer beautiful, empowering ways to connect with the world, the divine, and yourself. But let’s be real: the spiritual community can sometimes feel like navigating a metaphysical minefield. From “lizard people control the world” conspiracies to the pervasive influence of New Age cults, finding your way as a witch or pagan can feel daunting. So, how can you embrace this path while keeping your wits about you? Let’s dive into it—no tinfoil hats required.

---

1. Know Thyself and Do Thy Research

One of the most powerful tools for any witch or pagan is knowledge. Before diving headfirst into spiritual practices or belief systems, ask yourself:

What am I looking for in my path?

What resonates with me spiritually and ethically?

How can I learn more from credible sources?

Avoid treating every book, blog, or TikTok video as gospel truth. Instead, prioritize research from reputable authors and scholars. Look for historical, cultural, and anthropological contexts behind practices and beliefs. For example, if you’re exploring Norse paganism, read the Poetic Edda, but also check out scholarly works like Hilda Ellis Davidson’s writings.

💡 Pro Tip: If something sounds too fantastical or claims to have “secret knowledge,” approach it critically. “Ancient Lemurians built the pyramids” is not archaeology—it’s a conspiracy theory.

---

2. Critical Thinking: Your New Familiar

While spirituality embraces the unseen and mysterious, it doesn’t mean suspending all logic. Here’s how to keep critical thinking in your witchy toolkit:

Fact-Check Everything: Whether it’s a viral claim about moon water curing all ailments or a new trend like “quantum jumping,” take a moment to verify its origins.

Ask Questions: Who benefits from spreading this belief? Are there ulterior motives, such as selling courses, books, or products?

Beware the “Cult of Personality”: Be wary of influencers or leaders who discourage dissent or demand unquestioning loyalty. Spirituality thrives on diversity of thought.

---

3. Beware of Spiritual Bypassing

Some New Age ideas encourage bypassing real-world issues in favor of “high vibes only.” While positivity is great, ignoring trauma, systemic problems, or mental health struggles in the name of spirituality is toxic. True witchcraft and paganism embrace balance, acknowledging both the light and the shadow.

✋ Red Flag: Anyone who tells you to “just manifest” your way out of hardship or suggests that you’re attracting negativity because of bad energy. Life is more complex than that.

---

4. Stay Grounded in History, Not Appropriation

A common pitfall in modern paganism and witchcraft is cultural appropriation masquerading as spirituality. Using sacred practices or symbols from cultures you’re not part of without understanding their context can be harmful.

If you’re drawn to a practice, research its origins and ensure you’re honoring it respectfully.

Consider focusing on traditions tied to your own ancestry or exploring paths open to everyone, like modern witchcraft.

🌿 Example: Smudging is a specific Indigenous practice. Instead of co-opting it, explore alternative smoke-cleansing methods with herbs like rosemary or lavender.

---

5. Cult Warning Signs: Spot Them Early

Not all cults look like Hollywood’s hooded figures chanting in candlelit basements. In spirituality, cult-like behavior often hides under the guise of community.

Red Flags Include:

An authoritarian leader or group demanding absolute loyalty.

Isolation from family, friends, or outside perspectives.

Fear-based control tactics, like threatening spiritual punishment for leaving.

Heavy financial exploitation (e.g., expensive courses or “required” donations).

💡 Remember: True spiritual communities empower you to think for yourself, not rely on a single leader or system.

---

6. Separate Science from Spirituality

You can be a witch or pagan and still respect science. Magic doesn’t have to contradict reality—it works alongside it. For example:

Herbs like chamomile and valerian have scientifically proven calming properties, but that doesn’t mean they’re a cure-all.

Astrology can provide insight into your personality, but it’s not a substitute for therapy or medical advice.

🌙 Balance: Use spirituality as a tool for meaning and connection, not as a replacement for critical thinking or evidence-based practices.

---

7. Build Your Own Practice

You don’t need to follow every trend or adopt someone else’s path. Witchcraft and paganism are deeply personal journeys. Create a practice that aligns with your values and beliefs, free from the noise of conspiracy theories or cult-like pressures.

Ideas for Starting Out:

Learn about local folklore or the natural cycles in your area.

Experiment with simple rituals, like lighting a candle with intention or journaling under the moon.

Create an altar with objects that resonate with you—crystals, photos, or even trinkets that make you smile.

🌟 Most Importantly: Trust your intuition. If something doesn’t feel right, it’s okay to say “no, thanks.”

---

8. Community: Seek Connection, Not Control

Connecting with other witches and pagans can be enriching—but choose your circles wisely. Look for communities that:

Encourage discussion and critical thought.

Respect individual paths and practices.

Avoid fear-mongering or elitism.

👀 Where to Look: Online forums, book clubs, or open public rituals are great starting points. Just remember to maintain healthy boundaries.

---

9. Grounding Techniques to Avoid Falling for the “Woo Woo”

When exploring spirituality, it’s easy to get carried away. Grounding yourself regularly can help you stay centered:

Meditate or practice mindful breathing.

Spend time in nature, whether it’s a park or your backyard.

Write down your beliefs and revisit them regularly. Are they still serving you?

---

10. Be Open-Minded, Not Gullible

It’s okay to explore the mystical and unknown, but there’s a difference between curiosity and naivety. Stay open to new ideas, but don’t abandon discernment. Your path should feel empowering, not overwhelming or manipulative.

---

Final Thoughts

Witchcraft and paganism are all about connecting with nature, yourself, and the divine in ways that feel meaningful and authentic. By staying grounded, informed, and true to yourself, you can embrace this path without falling prey to conspiracy theories or cult-like traps.

Remember: You’re the captain of your own broomstick. Fly wisely.

╔══ ∙∘𓆩⟡𓆪∘∙ ════════╗

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╚════════ ∙∘𓆩⟡𓆪∘∙ ══╝

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[teaboot]

Forgive me if you’ve already answered something similar but how do you deal with crushing guilt when you did fuck up but there’s not really anything you can do to like make amends or you’ve already done anything you could and still feel guilty?

Like I know the guilt isn’t productive at all, if anything it’s just paralyzing me, and mentally beating myself up over it isn’t actually helping anyone. But I don’t know where to go from there. Idk how to actually forgive myself, or at least be able to move on

CW FOR SELF HARM

Okay, so this is something I've had to work through for a very long time myself, and there's a few different strategies that I've used to cope and process with varying levels of success.

What I used to do was handle the "I've ruined everything and hurt people and am never going to be forgiven" feeling by hurting myself in a number of creative and stupid ways, from physical hurt (Everything you'd expect) to mental hurt (wallowing, speaking badly of myself, going over the bad thing over and over again in my head) to passive hurt (neglecting my health, not eating properly, failing to pursue good living conditions, letting others hurt me, deliberately wandering into risky situations) and despite any short-term relief or peace I got, none of it ultimately fixed anything.

At the end of the day, making myself suffer as retribution or apology didn't fix the thing I'd done and didn't make the guilt go away, and all it gave me was an additional sense of shame and isolation because now not only was I a garbage person, I was a garbage person with something to hide from my loved ones. Zero out of ten, do not recommend.

The stuff that DID help was harder and is going to sound stupid because *I thought it was stupid* until it worked for me.

First: Learn the difference between GUILT and SHAME.

GUILT is how you feel about your choices.

SHAME is how you feel about yourself.

"I was late to a date again, that was inconsiderate": GUILT. The issue can be resolved by analyzing the reason behind the action and planning steps to avoid repeating it in the future. Guilt is productive because it motivates us to improve our choices. Once you've corrected the behaviour, it's over.

A"I was late to a date again, I'm inconsiderate": SHAME. The issue can be resolved by asking ourselves:

What negative thing to I believe about myself?

What other experiences support this belief? What evidence do I have that the bad thing is true?

Do those previous experiences have anything in common? Where they actually proof of a personal lack, or did someone just tell me they were? Were my choices and actions understandable? Did I have a reason? Was I trying to hurt others, or was it a mistake, accident, or learning experience? Have I grown from that experience?

Can I forgive myself for the past? What do I need to do to forgive myself for those past events? Was I really at fault at all, or was it out of my control?

Accept that.

Your present traumas and shames often have roots in beliefs you had about yourself before the new shameful thing occurred. When you dig into resolving the issues that led to today, you can use those conclusions to work through tomorrow. This is something I learned in cognitive behavioral therapy.

There are a number of ways of unpacking these questions, but as I felt I was deliberately avoiding my thoughts and feelings, I chose to jump into them directly, and found it to be effective.

You can write things down, talk to someone, paint something, draw something, whatever. Whatever at all works for you.

My solutions was to find a comfortable place on the floor, sit down, close my eyes, and do box-breathing (in for 4, hold for 4, out for 4, hold for 4) while deliberately thinking about every upsetting memory attached to a specific bad belief that I could recall until I had nothing left to go over.

Judge and jury. Was I a bad person, or did I make a mistake? Did I have malicious intentions, or did someone accuse me of malicious intentions? Am I bad, or have I been conditioned to believe I'm bad? And at the end of it all, am I capable of better? Do I want to be better? And would a truly bad person care?

It was more emotional than I expected the first few times. Cried a lot, actually. But if I can liken it to a common feeling, it was like getting out of a very thorough shower and realizing you didn't know how dirty you were before.

The process sucks ass, no lie, but it's worth it. Like draining pus from a gnarly wound to get it healed up properly.

I'm not an expert, of course, but life has gotten better since I started. I'm better at forgiving myself, at least.

Also: Some people will never forgive others even for tiny things. Sometimes once you've done your best, you've just gotta say "fuck 'em". C'est la vie, mon amie.

Good luck, yeah?

♡

[rafeyswrd]

HER ROYAL HIGHNESS

benedict bridgerton x princess (poc) reader

prologue.

After a series of agonising years of begging her mother to be let out into society — as a commoner would, equally putting her as the diamond of the season, the queen has finally, yet hesitantly agreed. Though with a single condition;

Sponsor the upcoming season. SUCCESSFULLY.

It was proven to be a challenge when her faith was put into the hands of the eldest bridgerton, whom was stubborn beyond belief. And it was only with the help of the second eldest that the princess might accomplish her goal.

However, getting Anthony to be married seemed to be less of a struggle in comparison to the hardship soon to occur with Benedict. Whose eyes never seem to leave her own.

OVERALL WARNING. smut!! (and lots of implied sex & talk), age gap (almost 8 years), toxic family, mentions of mental health issues, classism, abuse of power, mean ish lady danbury (i had to okay), alcohol consumption, misogyny, miscommunication, slowwww burn.

GENRE. fluff, angst, smut. a slight Rapunzel retelling, set in season 2–3 with mentions of season 1.

AUTHORS NOTE. ahhh!! i’m so excited for this, i’ve had this idea since i rewatched season 2 of bridgerton and read a one shot on here about princess reader, and it has not left my mind since. it takes place in season 2 and will have snippets of season 3. please feel free to leave suggestions of what you’d like to see xx

also!! i’ll finish your requests in my inbox soon i promise, this’ll probs make me go back to wp lol

[rizzanon]

omg! some focus on our girls!.

Stephanie and Batsis!readers relationship… it hurts so much.

Batsis was normal almost opened to Steph in the beginning. likely because Steph was not only outside of the family, outside of the people she needed to prove herself too but Steph was another girl struggling to be a vigilante just like her, that with the fact Batsis saved Steph in their first meeting likely soothed a lot of her insecurity because she was helpful and capable for once. it was a nearly perfect opportunity for Batsis to make a friend in her vigilante life, to have someone in her corner who could resonate with her, who she didn’t have to prove herself too… only for all that to come crashing down when Steph was chosen to be batgirl… for someone she had thought she was on the same level with maybe even slightly higher then to suddenly “be chosen over her” it triggered that same negative self image that had originally been absent in her relationship with Steph except so much worse because now she isn’t just shadow boxing now she has actual competition, one who has already won over her.

the fact that the actual reason Steph was chosen was due to Batsis degrading mental health in self-endangerment only makes this worse for her. grief can often time exacerbate already existing mental health issues like insecurity, feeling like if you were stronger or smarter, if you were better that who you lost would still be alive are so common and being a vigilante would only add “credibility” to those thoughts. if you’re fighting to save lives then how come you couldn’t have saved your loved ones?. those heightened negative feelings leading her to misconstrue why Steph was chosen to be batgirl making her unable that it was in part for her own safety even when directly told fully believing she was being lied to and seen as lesser.

all of that leads to her shutting out and lashing out at that one person she previously didn’t seem to feel a need to prove herself to, the one person who could understand her, the one person who seemed to have believed she was fit for the role as batgirl from the start who never doubted her before. Batsis’ own negative self image completely destroys her relationship with someone who believed in her and who she believed in. turning it into a competition turning that girl she could’ve built a bond with into nothing more then someone she needs to prove herself better then.

Stephanie seemed to truly believe in batsis despite noticing her flaws from their very first interaction. Steph knew Batsis wasn’t flawless and yet still clearly respected her, despite not wanting her help, because she related, she too wasn’t the best and need to improve, to Steph Batsis was someone who has more experience then her in the field of vigilantism but still reachable someone she could connect with, someone who had extended her belief, belief in her skills, in her determination, belief in her. and Steph extended it that belief back. she believed in Batsis, and it seems she still does even the tinniest bit.

Steph seemed so excited to show Batsis, her as batgirl. almost as if she was saying “look i’ve caught up with you now!” “we’re matching!” possibly thinking that them sharing the batgirl moniker would bring them closer together deepen their connection only for it to destroy it.

to suddenly be faced with such anger and accusation by someone who you were forming a bond with must’ve hurt so much. for someone who had once offered you such unwavering belief to view as nothing but competition, an obstacle they need to overcome, someone they need to knock down someone they need to be above… would be agonizing. not just losing their belief in you but gaining near condemnation as if they want nothing more then to see you fail all while accusing you of trying to hurt them of trying to replace them as seeing them as lesser…

Steph was just trying to prove herself, trying to find her place and unknowingly pushed Batsis out of the one she was trying to carve for herself.

Barbra was trying to help, both girls needed a guide, both were trying to prove themselves, trying to find their places, they needed to, they both needed help… and were equally deserving of it. but realistically Babs could only supply an adequate level of help to one. she could’ve and should’ve tried to do more for Batsis but there’s only so much one person could do. it was one or the other and Barbara knew that. she only likely knew that what Batsis was going through was much more then she was equipped to handle especially when she was also in charge of helping Steph. she could’ve and should’ve done more for batsis even if it was only ten precent more but she couldn’t have done much on her own…

it would need to be a group effort and unfortunately due to the circumstances it wasn’t very feasible but they still should’ve tried should’ve done something…

anyway thats it for todays amateur dyslexic analysis hour. babs section could be better but i need to sleep, i’ll domore when i get more scenes of her.

LITERALLY COULDN’T HAVE SAID IT ANY BETTER 🥹 i have to admit, steph and reader’s relationship became more complex than i intended for it to, but i think it fits well with the story now so im happy with that. you’re so right by saying that Steph was outside of the family and outside of the people reader needed to prove herself to. Steph was another girl struggling to be a vigilante just like her, which is why there was a chance for them to bond over, but all of it was ruined when steph became batgirl whilst reader was benched. reader being benched didn’t help with her growing insecurities and need for validation/to prove herself, and it only intensified seeing how someone else “stole” her role, the one thing she was trying to prove herself with.

as for babs, she was trying to help both girls, but she inevitably spent more time on steph and left reader alone. i agree that babs definitely could have handled it better, but for the sake of the plot we move on. i’d like to think that babs didn’t realise how vital her role is in reader’s life as a guide/mentor and a role model (considering she’s the first batgirl and the one who set the standards—very much like dick with robin) the person taking up the mantle after the first person set very high standards for it definitely don’t have it easy lol

there will be more of barbara and reader’s relationship explored in chapter 7, so hopefully you’ll look forward to that and babs owning up to her mistakes and seeing where she went wrong..! 🤭