#Cis 4 Trans Lesbian

[alexissara]

Okay so apparently a dumb poll is what gets me to finally finish chapter two after a year and a half of having the second part outlined. I love Moonlily so much so I bring my my little piece of propaganda to the table. For a touch of history I first concepted this fic when Sun and Moon came out, it was the first piece of art ever I felt inspired to write a fan fiction for for I wrote "letter's from Lillie" but I never published it. I rewrote it for AO3 a while back but kept it in the spirit of my old idea. Anyway, read my fic or vote MoonLilly or both.

Pokémon F/F Ship Tournament - Round 3, Matchup 2

[mogai-reblog]

As pride month is coming to a close, here's a positivity post for people who are often not included in these types of posts!!

For the hijras, for the tritiya prakritis, for the Hindu queers, for the Muslim queers, for the Christian queers, for the Jewish queers, for any religious queers, for the people who have a specific cultural/religious identity and thus doesn't see themselves as queer/LGBTQIA+, for the pangender agenders, for the mspec monospecs, for the gaybians, for the gais, for the strayts, for the nonbinary people who consider themselves straight, for the cis intersex people, for the straight people who are in a relationship with a nonbinary person and sees it as queer despite them being straight!, for the Palestinian queers both alive and dead, for the severely disabled queers, for the mid-high support needs queers, for the intellectually disabled queers

For the overshadowed people, for the hated people.

Of the people, for the people

[kaleido-write]

*me explaining lesbians are entitled to their own preferences but shouldn't put down trans people*

Terfs: you're homophobic !!!

...for what ? 😭😭 saying lesbian can be cis 4 cis if they want??? Like if you don't want to date someone who is trans it's ok pookie go for it . But don't be an asshole to trans people . That's all .

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

would you like to tell us about your research on virginity?

but also...wdym STIs aren't as scary as we think??? I was told most of them are incurable? I know you can make aids untrasmittable and that they've even succeded in curing it a couple times but that's about it. I would love to be educated about this

yeah, the basic idea with the virginity project was that the whole concept of virginity is pretty bullshit in the context in which it was initially significant, namely cisgender women being penetrated by cisgender men, so as soon as you take it outside of that context by introducing gay and trans sexuality it totally falls apart. I mean, hell, it stops working if you even look at two cishet people doing literally anything OTHER than penis-in-vagina sex. I tripped up so many people initially when I started asking questions like "okay, so you don't think a woman loses her virginity from a man going down on her. so what if it's two women? what's the difference?" and just really getting people to face down their very penis-centered view of the sex, to the result of several people telling me that it kind of made them reevaluate what they actually think of as the first time they had sex. it's also fascinating to either read other people's accounts or discuss firsthand how queer people have either tried to make themselves fit into the binary of virginity - queer man disagreeing over whether or not you have to have penetrative anal sex to lose your virginity or oral sex is sufficient, a fascinating case of a lesbian who felt that have sex with other cis women didn't "count" and asked a cis male friend to have sex with her just so she could feel satisfied that she'd lost her virginity - or abandon it entirely. Hanne Blank's book Virgin was a formative starting point, and it really exploded for me from there.

as for the STIs - hey, bad news! you fell victim to the scare tactics used to make people afraid of sex! almost all sexually transmitted infections are very easy to treat and cure with the right medicine, which is why it's important to get tested regularly and check in with your healthcare provider at the first sign of something amiss. pubic lice, scabies, trichomoniasis, gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis - all of those are pretty easy to get rid of with some help from your doctor and a run to the pharmacy!

the major exceptions are the 4 H's: herpes, HIV, HPV, and hepatitis B.

herpes is with you forever but is an incredibly mild companion to share your body with, considering most people never experience any notable symptoms and those who do can curb the severity with medicine.

it's also worth noting that herpes is so common as to be virtually ubiquitous; the World Health Organization consistently estimates that somewhere around 80% of the world's adult population is carrying herpes simplex virus 1 or herpes simplex virus 2. a great deal of those people don't even get it from having sex, but rather by catching HSV-1 from a parent or other people they come is close contact with as a child.

you're actually thinking of HIV (human immunodeficiency virus) when you mention AIDS becoming untransmittable, but that's still a very good thing! the care available for people with HIV has come incredibly far since AIDS first became known and claimed so many lives, and today it's more than possible for people infected with HIV to live long, healthy lives by taking the proper medication to manage their viral load.

with management, people with HIV will not develop AIDS (which happens when the immune system is sufficiently depleted by HIV) and by consistently taking their medication people with HIV can become undetectable (the viral load in their body is too small to be detected or measured in tests), at which point they are unable to transmit the virus to other people.

HPV (human paillomavirus) comes in many different strains, most of which are absolutely harmless and go away on their own after a couple of months or years of freeloading in your body. I cannot emphasize this enough: HPV is so common that virtually everyone who has sex has, will have, or has had it in their lives, and the vast, VAST majority of those people will never be troubled by it literally at all.

the trouble comes from a few strains of HPV that can cause genital warts, and a few others that can cause cancers in the throat, anus, cervix, vulva, vagina, and penis. while HPV can't be treated, you can reduce your risk of developing cancer by getting the HPV vaccine if you haven't already and, if you have a cervix, getting regular Pap smears to catch early warning signs of cancerous developments.

hepatitis B is a viral infection that targets the liver. in rare cases it can cause chronic health problems that can be very dangerous, but I have to emphasize that's not common. in most adults who get hep B, there will be no symptoms and it will resolve itself in a matter of weeks. the infection is riskiest in children, but at least in America most people have received vaccines against hepatitis B as babies since the 90s.

in conclusion: get your shots, take your medicine, use protection, get tested, and talk to your doctor, but know that if there's one thing humans are good at it's figuring out how to manage STIs. we've been doing it for a long time - most sexually transmitted infections and parasites have been with us since before we we became modern humans - so we're really good at it!

[genderqueerdykes]

I am a trans man who abandoned my previous account because i needed to leave the community.

The trauma and self hatred runs so deep that despite it being months i still can't think of my masculinity as anything other than wrong. Not just that, but leaving made me happier. Not having community made me happier. Think about that.

At least now I can see i deserve better. But it's hard knowing that my love and support was so summarily rejected by the transfems on this site.

i'm really sorry you've had to go through this, anon. you shouldn't have to do that

the thing is people don't realize that while this online fighting is pointless, it does hurt people. and it can cause genuine trauma because it IS abuse. abuse doesn't have to occur in person to be legitimate. a lot of acts of abuse and violence can be committed remotely with modern technology. basically anywhere people can interact, abuse can happen. this is actually hurting and scarring people in real ways and we need to acknowledge this

Not just that, but leaving made me happier. Not having community made me happier. Think about that.

the fucked up thing is i feel the exact same way. i interact with community on here in order to educate but outside of this, i currently do not interact with the queer community. once im off this blog, i'm not really interacting with queer community, i will talk to my queer friends and engage in my own queerness, but i am not thinking about the community for the vast majority of my day. i'm not interested in trying to casually go to a trans space and be misgendered all the time.

i immersed myself in my local punk community last year and all that happened to me was that i got a lot of hollow compliments, condescended to, talked over, fetishized, treated as a sex object, descriminated against, had people stop respecting me the instant they found out i was a trans man, had people try to tranny chase me for being a trans man with a vagina, got called too whiny and emotional, got accused of hating trans women because i'm a transmasc lesbian, got mocked for not having a penis, watched my roommate treat me with annoyance that wasn't there prior, felt alienated in my own home, and just in general felt ashamed that i wasn't an amab trans woman, because those were the only trans people who hung out there for any substantial amount of time

the transmascs and trans men never hung around for too long. the majority of the trans punks who showed up were transfem. like. almost all of them. it was rare to find another transmasc, and i can work a crowd, i don't feel scared or uncomfortable in crowds, so i will talk to just about anyone who acknowledges my presence. i met so many transfem punks that i've lost count, and about 3 or 4 transmascs. it frustrated me and took a while for me to realize why. that place was deeply transandrophobic. the regulars did not treat transmascs with kindness. i was actually sexually assaulted by one of the transfems there multiple times, and had another that was trying to come on to me because i have to do stretches for my lower back or else it locks up, and she saw this as an invitation for sex. my ex gf started treating me completely differently the second she discovered i didn't have a penis, to the point of actually progressing to yelling at me for being too whiny and emotional. the cis gay men that were there would talk about how breasts and vaginas were gross because they were gay men right next to me.

after leaving that community i feel so much better. i'm basically on my own, i don't mind it, that's how i like to live my life as a schizophrenic person, but outside of the way i interact with the community as someone who participates in education and activism, i don't really interact with queer communities. i'm tired of being harassed, targeted, insulted, misgendered, sexualized, and getting sexually assaulted.

this is the really sad truth right now. transmascs and trans men in particular usually live outside of queer communities. we are so alienated. that's the entire reason people think we don't exist. it's because so many people will not let us exist inside of queer spaces, so we have to live elsewhere. so many trans men end up having to have mostly cishet friends to avoid drama and harassment. it's not that we don't exist- it's that a lot of people just will not let us take up space in queer communities long enough for people to see how many of us there are. there are a lot of us, but we aren't being allowed to exist inside of queer spaces, so people trick themselves into thinking we're not real trans people

you do deserve better. i hope in time the trans community learns to treat trans men better. you don't deserve to have to alienate yourself like that, but that's just how things are right now. take care of yourself. you're important even if people don't want you to feel like you are.

[faggymutt]

also ur fucking slow if you think i haven’t been called a dyke

Hey! Dyke is a slur against lesbians and is theirs to reclaim, I recommend looking up the history behind it before trying to claim a slur against people you don’t identify with. It’s not a label for anyone to use and it’s not a silly fun word, it’s a literal slur that’s been used against us for decades and something we’ve finally reclaimed and made part of our culture. I understand gender and identity are hard but using a label you literally admit to not relating to in the slightest because you like the way the word sounds just feels weird and a little offensive.

okay tumblr anon, ill be sure to remember that whenever i’m having insane dyke sex with my boyfriend using my dyke strap and my dyke fingers and my dyke tongue and my dyke-

[transfemme-shelterdog]

I was an active participant in the ace/aro discourse on the side of aces and aros and tbh the reframing of it as “mean stinky asexys bullying trans women” is… this wasn’t history so historical revisionism isn’t right. Tumblr lore revisionism?

1. We saw multiple TERFs admit they became TERFs after becoming ace exclusionists because they found the arguments they were making for kicking asexuals and aromantics out were also arguments they could use against trans people.

2. I can think of multiple transfems who supported aces and aros. This may be a blind spot on my end, but the only transfem exclusionist I can think of was discourseprincesa who later turned out to be lying. She claimed to be an Afro-Latina Jewish intersex trans lesbian and every time someone tried to call her out from the perspective of a different marginalized group she’d suddenly reveal she had a connection there too. She was infamous for being a raging ableist who regularly suicide baited and harassed people, sometimes to the point of panic attacks and mental breakdowns, but her accidentally posting on the wrong blog where she’s honest about being a cis perisex white woman was what got every exclusionist to finally stop supporting her.

3. Wait, I almost forgot the other transfem who was an ace exclusionist. She was best known for dating the person who accused aces of stealing the color purple from bi people. Aside from those two, the majority of aphobes I saw and encountered were cis women, transmascs, trans men, and nonbinary people who either didn’t list their agab or were afab. This is not surprising when you’re on a website that is predominantly those who were afab. These demographic numbers would look a lot different if it took place on Reddit.

4. The entire ace discourse was nothing more than a site-wide bullying campaign against asexuals and aromantics, with any Ace or aro who was too open about their orientation risking getting mountains of anon hate and harassment, suicide baiting, etc., and even something as harmless as “cake and dragons” was open to receiving a slew of aphobic bullshit, to the point where aces and aros basically couldn’t have anything. We saw a lot of aces and aros go from being out and open about it to suddenly being so much quieter and hesitating if they even wanted to go to queer events at all, as they learned from years of harassment that they weren’t welcome there. Given how one post that sticks out to me is a person saying that if they saw an ace lesbian holding an ace flag at pride they’d punch her for it, I can’t say I blame them.

So, that’s all entirely from memory! I’m sure someone else can fill in additional details if they’d like.

Important history right here

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for asking my (36F she/her) girlfriend (32F she/they) to be out at work if she wants to become myanager ?

It's messy and complicated. I love my girlfriend very much and ultimately I think we are in a shitty situation with no real win and we have a different opinions on how to lose.

I am a polyamorous lesbian. I have a wife but I also sometimes have other secondary partners, and my wife does too.

I am happy to work in a place safe enough that I am out at work (about the lesbian part, not the polyamory part). My wife often comes at afterwork events and because she is a sweetheart, is loved by most of my colleagues.

I have been at this job for 4 years, that's how I met this colleague, Angel. This person looked familiar but I couldn't put my finger on it. We talked, grew a bit closer then I met them again outside of work, at a queer event of my city. This time I recognized them. Angel is trans, non binary and fem presenting, at work she is not out and present herself as a cis heterosexual man. We talked, I obviously swore to keep it a secret but knowing this part of her helped us growing even closer together. We have now been dating for 3 years.

Angel has a longtime girlfriend (childhood sweethearts even) as her primary relationship. Let's call her Valentine. Valentine is working in the same industry but not in the same company. Because it's a niche field, everyone knows everyone and we often meet at work events. I also like her very much and we are good friends. Val is terrified to be out as polyamori at work because she is afraid of what the gossip will do to her work reputation. Valentine has a more public facing role than Angel and I and I absolutely respect her desire to protect what she has.

Even if it doesn't look like it, I do like too to keep private and professional life separated… Angel and I mostly connected outside of the workplace at queer events and are also both deeply involved in the drag scene and the queer political scene of our city. We never flirted at work and have even never stole a kiss on workground. We just happened to fall in love anyway even if we recognized the situation was less than ideal.

Our company has been through a lot of changes recently. My teamleader is leaving and Angel(that previously worked in another department) has been asked if she wants the role.

She does.

I have more experience than her even if she has more seniority with the company. I have been pretty open about wanting a senior expert position rather than managerial one and that's why I have not been offered the role. I am really happy for her and think she will be a great manager and recognize it's a great opportunity.

But I don't want her to be My manager. It's a really dangerous position to have over a romantic partner and she recognizes that. Moreover even if we managed to keep our relationship a secret until now, we know it's a precarious position. If our secret would be revealed while she IS my manager it could be terrible for us. She could be accused of taking advantage of me, or me to want to sleep my way through the top. Keep also in mind that she is male presenting at work and I am publicly a lesbian so yeah… We are also in very committed relationship which is another mess… It would not look good for us should we be forcibly out…

That's why I want to go to HR while her candidacy is being studied and explains the whole thing or at least some of them. I don't want to leave my team because my mentor is there and not a lot of people are doing what we do but maybe we could sort something out together? I would agree for Angel to be the team leader if I have a separate manager… Or maybe Angel could be the leader of another team ? Or I could become a more independent team member ? Angel and I are publicly work best friends so it would made sense anyway for me to have a different manager to keep things more fair.

Angel doesn't want to, and Valentine is absolutely against it. Angel thinks it will ruin her chance at the position. Maybe want to sort things out After she has been offered the job, maybe try to work out how we would work at manager/managee for some time before calling HR. I would not be against waiting for a real offer but listening her talk, I am afraid she intends to push things forever. Angel is afraid HR will reveal our secret to everyone. I recognize our HR team is not the best and even gossipy but it's about really private and protected things (in my country) : our sexual orientation and sexual identities. We also have a very good Union (with queer delegates) and even if I am unsure about HR, I am sure the union will remember them the law protecting us here and will ultimately behave appropriately. But I recognized it's a risk.

I want to break things of with Angel if she doesn't want to go to HR. My wife says it's mean and manipulative to use this kind of ultimatum. The way I see it I am just protecting myself. Angel is putting her job before our relationship and I am OK with that, she is also priorizing Valentine's needs (as she should) but in this case, I should be allowed to do the same and protect myself and my job. From my point of view, Angel could : refuse the position, go to HR, or accept the breakup.

AITA for this ultimatum ? Valentine thinks I am. Angel is confused. My wife disapproves but loves me to much to call me an asshole.

[tjodity]

dsmp lesbian analysis post

this was based on a misreading of a different post so now im rating how lesbian dsmp characters are. no real criteria just going off of vibes from a lesbian. based vaguely on how lesbian they are and how much they might identify as lesbian

C!Phil- (4/10)-he has a wife so thats something. he's kinda forgone most identities by this point he just does what he wants

C!Tubbo-(1/10)-im sorry thats just some binary gay transmasc guy. he may have briefly been a lesbian in his early teens so he had an extremely on the spot explanation for schlatt abt dressing masc but he likes men (a lot) so he never really had any attachment to the label

C!Ranboo-(3/10)-they arent really interested in women but he's got a lesbian gender thing goin on. guy with a weird relationship to femininity

C!Dream-(2/10)-she actually is a lesbian but no ones told her that yet and she's probably not gonna figure it out on her own. mamacita was an egg cracking experience

C!George-(0/10)-im sorry i dont see it

C!Niki-(10/10)- trans curious bisexual woman who wears a trench coat and has ratty dyed pink hair and knows how to tie a lot of different kinds of knots and not for boat reasons. she's having a full boar gender and sexuality crisis starting during the election. dyke as a gender identifier probably wouldn't occur to her but she'd like it a lot. she'd also like the old flag with the axe

C!Sam-(2/10)-not really a lesbian at all but if puffy squints hard enough while theyre making out sad style she can act like he's a cute butch

C!Fundy-(3/10)-he doesnt really call himself a lesbian but whenever he has a crush on a woman he in his head says he's being gay for her. accidentally postponed niki's sexuality crisis by transitioning to a guy

C!Punz-(10/10)-look at him. look at him. butch lesbian who kinda acts like a dog for the girl she's obsessed with. religious horror toxic devotion yuri buff lady general tragedy we got it all. also tommyinnit certified look

C!Hbomb-(3/10)-she's mostly straight but a lot of her admiration of other women and learning to do femininity in a way she likes kinda aligns her with lesbians. she believes in their beliefs

C!Sapnap-(??/10)-kinda in a quantum state of lesbianism for me. could go either way honestly. if her fiances want her to be a girl she can be

C!Karl-(9/10)-karl set off everyone's lesbian radar they didn't know they had which was really confusing cause it presented like a gay cis guy for a long while. tubbo just happens to ask her abt gender once on a whim n she's like oh no im a girl thing :3 and everyone else freaks out cause it was just not correcting them. it likes flamboyant masc fashion and being confusing

C!Quackity-(10/10)-watch the quackhalo date stream if you haven't yet i'm begging you. bigender transfem girlguy guygirl who wants to be someone's girlfriend and have a girlfriend or multiple or many. she's running the full gambit of presentation in a bunch of combos

C!Badboyhalo-(5/10)-Quackity brings out the lesbian in her (she's a closeted transfem lady and it makes her very flustered when she realizes q's calling her his girlfriend.) the bigboobies in bigboobyhalo are the result of lots and lots of estrogen

C!Wilbur-(0/10) he doesnt know lesbians are real

C!Puffy-(7/10)-the best way i can describe puffy's gender is that she is earnestly trying to be as confusing contradictory and horny as possible and it's working. she's a lesbian but only when she's a guy or just extremely down bad for some lady and if you called her a dyke she'd moan

C!Slimecicle-(7/10)-lesbian as a gender thing. he doesn't like using typical words to describe his gender but lesbian is the closest to standard it'll go

C!Hannah-(10/10)-she likes women. A LOT. and also worked hard to become one. just a lot about women going on in her life

C!Schlatt-(???/10)-he's got some shit to sort through n maybe that'll be a realization he makes down the road

C!Foolish-(2/10)-if you tried hard enough you could make him one

C!Tina-(10/10)-many of her actions are motivated by the need to kiss a girl with teeth

C!Eret-(8/10)-strong yuriful vibes

C!Tommyinnit-(9/10)-they are fucking ATTACHED to that label you can pry it from their cold dead hands. she also likes boys n is more platoniromantic than anything but. lesbian critter right there it's important to her

C!Aimsey-(-1000/10)-killed your wife idiot

[velvet-cupcake-games]

It's About to Get Real Gay in Here

I am fully transitioning to work on John's route this week, and I realized that from here on out in the main game, all Made Marion romances are unambiguously Queer 4 Queer (except Gui's, which is Almost Certainly Q4Q But It Doesn't Really Come Up). I didn't mean to put the two most hetero guys first. John was actually supposed to be the second route, but his route and Robin's are two of my most emotionally complex to write and I wanted a break in-between.

For newer fans, it shakes out like this (in modern terminology):

Marion is and always has been bi/pansexual.

John is a bi/pansexual cis man.

Meissa is a bi non-binary person with a preference for femme-leaning partners.

Alanna is a lesbian cis woman.

Gui is some flavour of non-hetero and is cis but gender-nonconforming.

Geoffrey is a demisexual cis man (and probably somewhere on the aromantic spectrum as well).

So let's put down a few Ask Box Ground Rules!

I will brook no homo-, bi-, aroace-, or transphobia in the ask box. If your question is offensive it gets deleted. I've been blessed with a generally quite pleasant ask box so far, let's keep it that way!

Yes, these basic sexual preferences are canon. I don't use modern sexuality terminology in the game because research strongly points to pre-modern peoples not thinking of sexuality as an inborn orientation. But of course pre-modern people knew that different people have different sexual preferences.

Why do I use bi/pan for Marion and John? Because they could easily use either label to describe themselves and because I like to reinforce the fact that bisexuality is not trans- or non-binary exclusive. This is not up for debate on this blog.

I will be particularly cranky if there is hate toward John as a bisexual man who has had male partners in the past. I've seen this happen to other LGBT/amare romance VN developers and I have no tolerance for it. If I get flooded with this kind of thing, I will simply turn off anon.

In a similar vein, I have been open about the fact that Meissa has a penis. I don't do ambiguous genitals for non-binary characters because I write explicit love scenes and it would absolutely not be fair to be all "and then they touched each other in their happy spots" for only non-binary characters. We all have bits, regardless of gender identity. This does not mean that Meissa is a man. They are not.

Everybody good? Good! Let's have fun, be gay, and, well... as this IS a Robin Hood game... DO CRIMES.

[euniexenoblade]

Re: The ask about social issues. I saw some folks talking about men being able to be lesbians and I guess I just never thought about it much before? I've never really given it much consideration so I'm kinda just mostly confused. I don't really trust the people who were talking about it tho bc they believe in transandrophobia so I kinda wanted to hear more about it from someone else and I've always thought your stuff on topics like this seemed really well informed and thought out so I figured I'd ask you :o If it's not something you know much about tho or perhaps just don't want to get into it I totally understand! ^_^

So like, this is going to potentially be long winded so stay with me + I'm probably gonna piss some people off so

1) cishet men have done weird "we're lesbians too" kind of stuff for ages. It's like, such a dead joke. It was even a thing Drake said in a popular song

The point being, the status quo is to violate boundaries of sapphic women and force men onto them. Thus "men can be lesbians" is lesbophobic.

However.

2) The lesbian community has a long and storied history that involves the fuckery of gender. Before the word "transgender" became such a household term, lesbians were basically identifying as stuff that might look like nonbinary genders today. It turns out when you're gay and reject the status quo of misogyny and surround yourself with others like that, you tend to create a new view of what gender is. There's a grocery list of examples of this but the point is, there is precedent to this. Which comes to

3) I think transmascs that find themselves in the lesbian community and choose to keep identifying as such is fine. Like, it's not my place to dictate people's genders, identities, or sexualities. My problems rise from A) the theft of transfem terms. "Transbian" is a very specific thing, it's a trans woman lesbian, when transmascs steal the term it muddies the term and takes part in pushing transfems out. Also B) when cis lesbians are accepting of transmasc aligned lesbians they usually reject transfem lesbians because they view us as men, which means they view said transmascs as women - essentially transfems getting rejected from groups that actually are accepting of transmascs. As much as some people want you to think this doesn't happen, it does, a lot. And a lot of transmascs actually add on to it "well you have a penis why would lesbian want you around??"

4) transandrodorks are probably saying "men can be lesbians" because of sex/gender essentialist view. They are definitely referring to transmascs and there's a conversation to be had on "why are you saying these non woman identities are women," but I don't want to spend the time dissecting that cuz it's pointless. But, also, the "transandrophobia is real" crowd has time and time and time again shown they see trans women as men. So this really brings up, what is a man to them? When they're a man, it's uplifting, it's lesbian, it's positivity, it's the queerest thing ever. But when they find a t4t transbian they're mad at, said transbian is "socialized male," hysterical, violent, a predator.

5) the short here is it depends who says it and what's the context. "Men can be lesbians" from a cishet dude is lesbophobic. "Men can be lesbians" from a random transmasc is probably fine. "Men can be lesbians" from a transandrodork is likely some kind of distilled transmisogyny, an outcome from getting mad at a trans lesbian. But, there could be nuance. *Shrug* I don't know, it's not my place to really care what people call themselves

6) I think "men can be lesbians" is a very frustrating argument. I think "transmascs can be lesbians" makes sense and is fine. But the former is wording that relies on the sexist and homophobic oppression lesbians have suffered since forever. I think this issue is largely in language, but also transandrodorks and inherently transmisogynistic, so. Yeah.

My opinion is I don't have a real opinion. I don't care.

[palidoozy-art]

I do this every year for pride, for visibility. This year's a little earlier, at least.

Hello! My name is Palidoozy, aka Emile Flowers. I am a bisexual transgender male, currently married to a wonderful (cis) husband. I transitioned roughly... almost 10 years ago at this point? I can't remember. I work at Maxis/EA as a Concept Artist, working on the Sims 4. Some of the packs I've worked on have been the Werewolves, Crystal Creations, Basement Treasures, and Book Nook.

I moved from Texas to Massachusetts in the past year, due to the politics, climate, and to be closer to my family. I don't regret it. My HRT clinic actually shut down a month after leaving Texas. Meanwhile, here where I live in MA? I see pride flags all year round. There are crosswalks are painted in transgender flag colors. I've met more openly gay and trans people than I have in the 9 years I lived in Texas. CoL is muuuuuuuuch higher, but I'm glad to be at a point in life I can afford it. And I'd rather pay more than live under the whims and fuckery of Texas' state politics.

But there's still reminders. There's the news, obviously, but we actually had a hate crime around here about two weeks after I moved in, back in September of last year. There's a local church that has doors outside their congregation, painted to represent trans rights, lesbian rights, gay rights, and BLM. Someone vandalized them. I actually walked by them that morning. As cruel as it was, however, the response of the community was really strong. The church pulled the doors, had them repainted about two days later, and put a big ol' passive-aggressive (or just straight up aggressive) sign over their doors about it.

I'm much happier here than I have been in the past 10 years. I keep getting older, which sucks, but my life keeps getting better, which is pretty neat.

Anyway, happy pride. I hope life is good to you. 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

[gaywarcriminals]

How much lesbingqiu is there?

Since exactly One (1) person asked for the femslash slash stats on my post about the proportion of hetswap in the bingqiu AO3 tag, I have obliged. 

I used the bingqiu tag and filtered by F/F. Obviously many of these results are F/F side pairings with M/M bingqiu, so from there, I counted them by hand.

I excluded crossovers from my search criteria, but I did a separate search to include the fics tagged with both SVSSS and Scumbag System. At time of writing there were 257 and 18 fics respectively, or 275 total.

I have included fics with multiple pairings and polyships. Iirc this was only relevant to Bingliushen.

I counted collection fics that had at least one fembingqiu ficlet/chapter.

I included art posted to the archive.

I included podfics posted to the archive, and counted them and the fics they were based on as two separate works.

I am excluding fics where male characters' bodys or genitals are temporarily changed for a plot device but the characters maintained their original gender identity.

By these criteria, I counted 140 lesbingqiu fics on AO3. At time of data collection there are 7005 total fics in the bingqiu tag, meaning lesbingqiu makes up 0.01999% of the bingqiu tag

For funsies, I have also noted instances of trans bingqiu!

I am including fics where amab Shen Yuan Transmigrates into a cis woman and decides they're okay with this body in the trans category. 

If gender was not mentioned in a fic I defaulted to cis.

I am lumping all iterations non-binary bingqiu into the trans category, including afab non-binary bingqiu.

Not all fics with trans characters are tagged as such, so I skimmed any fics I was unsure of, but I'm sure I inevitably missed some.

Cis bingqiu - 118 Trans SQQ x cis Binghe - 8 Trans Binghe x cis SQQ - 6 T4T bingqiu - 4 Monsterfucking body weirdness, gender fucky omegaverse, or high tier SQQ gender shenanigans that I didn't know how to categorize - 4

Reflections

WAY LESS THAN I THOUGHT??? I think my perception has been skewed by what a high proportion of my fandom friends are lesbians, and how often femslash AUs feature in our discussion. 

Similarly, the fact that there are only four T4T fics was genuinely shocking to me-- I forget sometimes what a bubble I'm in lmao. I also noted that trans bingqiu was a more recent development, at least on AO3; the first fic I found to feature trans girl SQQ was from January of 2022.

I don't have exact numbers because I didn't think of it until halfway through, I noticed that in almost all the NSFW fics where just one of bingqiu was trans, the trans girl topped. This was an interesting mirror to the trend I've noticed where, in cases where just character is a trans man, he almost always bottoms. I'll shelve speculation about that for another post tho. 

[genderqueerdykes]

"entire online queer community collectively forgot, or rather pretends that queer allies don't exist"

funny thing was when I was in high school in the mid-2000s, the "A" in LGBTQIA was just as often assigned to "allies" as asexuals. the obvious reason being that if you didn't yet want to label yourself in a homophobic society, 'ally' was an easy way to say that you're here to be supportive without outing anything about yourself

yeah! that's exactly it!

i think we've lost the spirit of that entirely. we should not have to force people to out anything about themselves whatsoever. i don't like that. i feel like that goes against what we stand for. i don't feel like any queer space should force its participants to out themselves. i don't really care if people who are cishet or whatever read my blog and genuinely learn and take the time to understand things better. that's a good thing.

it was kinda cool that the A could mean multiple things, it didn't force people to disclose exactly what. now obviously we need asexual, aromantic, agender and other aspec representation, and my college's pride group had that, mostly because i was talking about it to the president who was a childhood friend of mine, but i think we just straight up forgot that it really can stand for ally. like. i don't like that people don't want to acknowledge that there are a lot of cishet people out there who genuinely like trans partners and people and aren't judgment or weird or gross about it. there genuinely are cishet people who like it, or don't care in the sense that it doesn't bother them, but they are invested if you talk about it.

we have to stop assuming the worst. i think that's really what it comes down to.

it's a good thing if someone's 70 year old cishet grandpa comes to the pride meeting and sees that gays, lesbians, mspec people, trans people, intersex people, and other queers are just normal people. it's a good thing if the lesbian brings their supportive mom and dad. it's okay if a gay man brings their supportive mom and sister to their drag performance at the gay bar. it's okay if trans women bring their supportive cishet brothers, dads, sisters and girl friends who can help them pass or stay safe outside of queer spaces. it's okay if trans men bring their best friend who's a cishet guy and is supportive of the community to the trans meetup.

hot take but i also believe that cis gay dads with a lesbian daughter belong in lesbian spaces, too. i believe that cis lesbian moms belong in trans spaces so they can support their trans kids. i believe that cishet parents belong in gay spaces to learn more about and support their gay kids. i believe perisex cishet parents, friends and partners belong in intersex spaces so they can support their loved ones and the community. i believe that cis bi/pan/mspec men & women belong in trans spaces if they're attracted to trans people. i believe that the cishet polyamorous guy who has 4 girlfriends who all love each other gets to come to the meeting. cishet people belong at the aromantic & asexual meetings.

we need to stop assuming things about each other and let us have open discussion. it's not good to try to guess what someone else's identity is just by looking at them. that's profiling. it's just not helping. people are allowed to disclose as much or as little information as they want. asexuals and aromantics don't deserve to be talked over of course, but i feel like we've tried to erase allies in order to lift aspectrum people up and it's not the way to go. we should uplift everyone who supports us!

thanks for stopping by! i appreciate this ask a lot

[cactusyogurt]

life is so funny bc i went from a cis lesbian then got through a 4 year journey of experimenting labels and trying to understand my gender just to come to the conclusion that I'm a cis lesbian i think

i prefer she/her but if i get called another pronoun i don't really mind?

well, i at least understand myself better now

anyways trans and nonbinary people are valid as fuck, just because i found out i was not enby doesn't mean everyone is wrong about themselves

[trans-all-at-once-tournament]

Propaganda:

Crona:

- Was always referred to as gender neutral in the manga

- The mangaka has gone out of his way to state that their AGAB is unknown and that their design is intentionally ambiguous

- The latest reprint of the manga uses they/them for them

- Even though characters will sometimes question their AGAB, the story quickly moves on and the question is ignored

- Their identity is respected despite being an antagonist for a large part of the story (both manga and anime)

- As an nb lesbian they are very important to me

Link:

- It's Link

- Was originally designed so that people could project onto them regardless of gender

- I mean. Have you SEEN some of the outfits they give them in Tears of the Kingdom? That ain't cis