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#CRYING WHY AM I STILL UP
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so....ignoring the fact that it took me three (3) weeks to get through um. twenty-six (26) pages. it's totally reasonable to try to speedrun revisions of the next thirty-two (32) in like six (6) hours tomorrow, right, Asking For A Friend,
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opikiquu · 5 months
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bags-of-regret · 28 days
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Thinking about how long both Stans were alone for. Stanley trying and failing to not be alone while Ford pushed everyone away. How everything would be different if they just always had each other. It all came to an end with Dipper and Mabel omg sedate me
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beanghostprincess · 6 months
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Sanji and Usopp during The Sabaody Incident™ won't leave my mind.
Usopp standing in front of Sanji protectively because he is wounded and he can't fight, so Usopp will do it for him ("I'll do what you can't do").
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There is just something about Sanji's expression when he realizes he might actually lose Usopp. This is my interpretation, at least. He is literally frightened.
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Usopp helping Sanji stand up to run away. This is crucial for something I want to point out later: Sanji needs help to stand up. (Also, Brook disappears trying to protect them both and saying he will do anything to save them even if it costs him his life. I am feeling sick).
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Sanji being self-sacrificing and blaming himself for not being able to protect them/act sooner is not new. But he does manage to gain the strength to fight when Usopp is the only one left with him and the possibility of losing him is even more real now.
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The thing that I love the most about this is not Sanji sacrificing himself for Usopp, because he does that. He is like that. But Usopp not running away or moving in the slightest because he refuses to leave Sanji on his own.
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Something I'd like to point out too is that Sanji actually touches Kuma before Usopp disappears. He tries to fight and protect him and Kuma could've easily sent Sanji to Momoiro Island right away, and yet Sanji was just sent flying far from the scene and forced to see Usopp disappear in front of him.
And I am not saying that "not being able to protect both Brook and Usopp (especially Usopp) is needed for Sanji to realize he has to become stronger and find more reasons to go back with the crew" but not being able to protect both Brook and Usopp (especially Usopp) is needed for Sanji to realize he has to become stronger and find more reasons to go back with the crew.
Not to mention that we can't deny (right after Water 7/Enies Lobby) that Usopp is one of Sanji's strongest bonds within the crew. This specific scene focusing on them both is more than enough to prove it.
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Sanji seeing Usopp disappear in front of his eyes without being able to do anything to save him.
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Remember what I said about Sanji needing help to stand up seconds ago? Well. This is him the moment Usopp disappears. What adrenaline and the power of love do to a mf.
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They are so "I can lose everything, but not you. Oh God, not you" shaped.
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tree-obsession · 6 months
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I AM NOT OKAY DEAR GOD IT'S BEEN HOURS AND I AM STILL WEEPING
his gentle face??? the soft, delicate, kind voice and his eyes visibly softening even more and the real, genuine little smile as he blesses his younger self with his sister's voice in the background.
hoyo why do you hurt us like this it's going to consume my thoughts for DAYS now
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cerealbishh · 8 months
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"You really care about me."
"Yeah. I really, really care about you."
"I- I really care about you too."
"No, but... I like, really, really care about you."
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helluvahotmess · 4 months
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'I want you to continue to be who you are.' what if i fucking died what then
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uncanny-tranny · 1 year
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I think it can be true that certain lifestyle changes can help with pain and disability, but people really overplay how those changes will affect people's lives.
I've found that exercise has helped my back pain - I have had chronic back pain that PT didn't touch, but exercise has helped. However, what hasn't changed is what exasperates that pain, and when my pain is especially exasperated, it doesn't matter how much I exercise, I'll be in my bed trying so hard to get out, and I'll be seeing white. So, yes, exercise helped me, but it did not save me. That's an example of what I mean.
It's fine to give (solicited!!) advice to people about how to manage things like this. But I'm begging people to be realistic about this. Lifestyle changes can only do so much, and disabilities are - surprise! - disabling.
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satorisoup · 2 months
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people will think im ordinary until they say one (1) thing about tmnt and all of a sudden im explaining the entire lore starting from the 1990’s movie & why donatello is the best turtle i fear… T^T
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tag limit fights me… i must yap… please listen… SOB </3
#tmnt yap in the taggies !!#would you believe me if i said my cat is named after donnie… teehee !! ^_^#i have been a tmnt lover since i was the ripe age of 6 years old SOBSOB#i used to write bf headcanons on wattpad way long ago… thats where my love for writing started i fear…#i probably have more tmnt merch than i do anime merch which is soso crazy to think about PHEW !!!#notebooks cups plushies legos shirts pajamas stickers tins action figs keychains name something and i have it… is that weird… SOB#im not joking when i say i know the entire lore and could explain everything from start to finish… FOR EACH AND EVERY REBOOT EVER…. wowza…#other than rottmnt because i’ve never been a fan of that reboot sigh…#the only reason donatello hamato isnt on my blorbie list is because i do not want to seem out of touch… he used to be there though !! :3#also i love raph too sigh#i fear donnie was my start to my love for nerdy men… raph was for the mean ones… cough cough akaashi and bakugo#tall lanky men… yeah hes a turtle… i know… let me speak… pls… i beg… T^T#tmnt 2012 will always be my star my light my beloved#i can recite every single episode </3 ALSO THE 2014 & 2017 MOVIES DONT GET ME STARTED i have them on dvd :3#i also have the 1990’s movies on dvd teehee theyre sososososoo good T^T my comfort franchise forever and always#i may always speak of anime but just know tmnt will always be the start of it all and my most beloved <3 its everything to me#also i was and still am an avid tmnt 2012 april oneil hater someone get her out of there i loathe her >:/#was never a supa big fan of leo im very sorry… idk who im sorry to… where are my tmnt fans… am i alone in this world… hello… tmnt fans…#omigosh im back after looking at my old wattpad story IM GIGGLING why was the writing kinda good… it was first person though sigh… goodness#i should create my own tmnt yap tag i fear… i will never shut up about it EVER SOBSOBSOB !! i even had a tmnt party when i was younger </3#donnie ( & mikey ) are so misunderstood UGH i could yap about the lore all day. donnie deserved more recognition he was always doing so muc#FOR ALL of his brothers and they never appreciated it… ill cry right now. donnie you will always be famous to me. april doesnt deserve you.#raph and his temper are so misunderstood too like please. always making him the bad guy HE JUST WANTS TO BE A GOOD BROTHER HES JUST AWKWARD#remembering when i had a crush on a guy names joseph in first grade and he liked tmnt too… joseph just know we were soulmates… i promise </#i used to go up to the tv and kiss the screen when donnie showed up. i was like 6 years old tho its okay… still sleep with my stuffie tho.#thank you to my yaya for buying me that when i had the flu hes still in perfect condition SOB donatello i love you so much UGH im crying#‘thats a mutant turtle ew !!’ HE IS VERY BEAUTIFUL AND LOVEABLE TO ME. YOU WOULDNT UNDERSTAND EVERYPONY </3 nia reference woah hi nia :3#whos in favor of tmnt. raise your hands up high so i can see them. im giggling. tmnt lovers rise we sha’ll prosper… WE RIDE AT DAWN 🦅🦅🦅#is this like totally crazy of me… has anyone read this far… if you have jusy know i love you. i cherish you. you are my everything <3#₍ᐢ..ᐢ₎ — lene’s latest gossip .ᐟ
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First of all, I just want to say. I called it lol
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Finally an sskk face off since the sacrifice. I am going insane. I can’t articulate all my thoughts rn but something about the way Atsushi aimed a kick at Akutagawa that he fully expected the guy to block (because they know each other’s usual fighting styles!!!) only for it to connect and hurt him; Atsushi begging Akutagawa to recognize him because even if he still can’t consciously admit it, Atsushi has become convinced that Akutagawa wouldn’t be attacking him like this if he knew it was him; pleading for him to snap out of it and demanding to know why he saved him aghhhhh I’m going feral we know the reason Atsushi we know whyyyyy
I can’t believe it actually. We are at the point where sskk do not want to genuinely hurt each other. Atsushi attacked only out of self defence and was taken aback by actually breaking his wrist. Akutagawa refused to kill Atsushi in the Fukuchi fight and Atsushi is now convinced he’d stop attacking if he recognized him. Holy shit. Oh my god.
And Sigma badass moment! My boy, he pulled through! Either him or Chuuya had to break the stalemate; hell yeah, validation. Wasn’t there a meme someone made? “Prison arc -> prison arc if Sigma still had a gun”? Well Sigma’s got a gun and things are picking up babyyyy! His retort to Fyodor was quite possibly the funniest thing he could’ve said in response. Just completely shut him down. Using what he’s learned running the empty home Fyodor previously tried to buy his trust with. Beautiful. ADA Sigma real??? (I think the story will have to acknowledge his very public involvement with Taneda’s shooting and the acts of terrorism the Hunting Dogs now know he is responsible for… so I’m not sure how that will go but I’d like to see him end up with the Agency tbh… so long as it makes sense.)
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Things I did not expect:
Mysterious note left in Russian??? It could be Mykola I suppose but… why? What happened? If he’s actually in trouble I doubt he’d need help escaping. Is it a trap? But what for? Alternatively… could it be Pushkin? He was in Meursault initially right? We never found out what his connection was. It could be a new Russian author too! Intriguing! There’s also the matter of it being written in Russian in the first place - who is it meant for? Sigma specifically? Or is it meant for someone else who speaks Russian?
Dazai is actually injured! I was certain he had something ready to get out on his own but I like this much better. Tbh I know this sounds bad but I’m actually way more invested now that Dazai has a broken leg and Fyodor was just shot. There’s higher stakes, you know? Damn though. I think Dazai’s injuries are. Worse. He’s being terribly self-sacrificial, and is apparently going to face off against Chuuya next time we see him. I do think now the stakes would be too low if Chuuya was completely free of the brainwashing tbh… I’m hoping for a double “I know you’re in there” fight between skk and sskk. Not that Dazai can do much physically but his strength has always been with words anyways, and I am certain Chuuya’s already fighting back. And I know Atsushi will reach Akutagawa. Manifesting sskk reunion where they challenge Fukuchi again and win this time via the power of unbreakable trust (delusional).
Sigma asks Fyodor “WHAT are you?” Which is interesting, and I’m hoping will acknowledge the way Fyodor doesn’t seem to age… but also intriguing is the “getting closer” part on the side which implies he’s not quite right. I think Fyodor will still turn out to be human tbh (it’d be weird otherwise, thematically), but now I’m starting to lend a little more weight to that theory about a Fyodor double…
Well anyways. This was a lot. I’m going to helplessly whir about it for a bit now.
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alluralater · 7 months
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just finished moving around/reorganizing my entire bedroom. i have cried three times today but now i’m laying in bed, my room smells of roses, and i’m eating french bread. this was not the bipolar hot girl mania i was promised but damn if i don’t do it well
#i haven’t been sleeping well at all whatsoever for the past two weeks and it’s gotten to the point where my dreams are so vivid but not just#like ugh i can’t explain it on here because im not about to open a whole can of worms like that in my tags and be like revealing#family secrets.#essentially i am having normal dreams but they are horrendously vivid and of no real purpose.#i woke up fucking like completely upset this morning and then started crying#my roommate thinks it’s because i haven’t been sleeping + everything else going on#and like ya know what she’s PROBABLY right#but even still i just need my body to LISTEN TO ME and stop being all sensitive!!!#i legitimately almost texted the loml this long text today and thank fuck i didn’t because who knows where that would lead#but i’ve been having dreams about them too and it’s frustrating me. like the universe is trying beyond all measure to push us back together#and i just have to keep saying no. it’s like this test of morality except it never fucking ENDS and the consequence is actually pleasure and#relief beyond measure. like— to even just kiss them again? to hear them say my name again.#whenever we’re out at the same time i can feel them staring at me and i can see them in my peripherals watching me#just fucking forcing this love into me. the feeling of their hands on my body and all of their questions about how i’m doing#god i can feel all of it.#i nearly fucking threw up last time a few weeks ago when they kept watching me and i got so overloaded with emotions and my fucking stomach#wouldn’t stop turning. but anyways right like— i cannot be with them and i don’t want to be. like yes im still attracted to them and yes i#feel all of these feelings but it stops me dead in my tracks when i remember what they said and the things they did.#i am not the woman who bends my convictions because i love someone. i can’t be that person. i won’t be that person. not for anyone and#not for them. but i see them in my dreams anyways and it is all too real and too present. it’s hardly ever the present so why. why why why?#it makes me terrified thinking that i will one of these nights just say yes and they’ll kiss me and everything that means anything in myself#will virtually mean nothing. like i won’t be a good person because i’ve knowingly allowed them to have me.#so anyways yeah and the fact that my snapchat memories and everything else are just FILLED with pictures and videos of us is killing me.#i really am scared that i’ll just give in. and what worse is that i would just double down and not tell anyone. i wouldn’t fucking#tell a soul if we did anything because i just know it isn’t right. and the fact that i know i wouldn’t be honest means i KNOW it’s bad.#so what the fuck. the fuck am i supposed to do when i have all these dreams and even just the ones about my mom and my brother#my family- i want to talk to them about it. i want to fucking cry to them and tell them how much it hurts that they hurt people and i’m just#some occasional exception to that because they love me. and i want to fucking scream. i want to know why. i want to fuck them until they#can barely breathe and then do it all over again. i want to feel their perfect fingers inside me and i want their mouth on mine. i fucking#HATE that they couldn’t be a good person. ugh okay anyways why did you read this??
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adamsvanrhijn · 21 days
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when i tell you i've only been listening to 2016 mitski and 2017 phoebe bridgers and spending all of my free time watching gay couple home renovation shows and exmormon comedy girl youtube videos...
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unabletomakedecisions · 5 months
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The other avatars don't want you to know this but the bugs in the attic are free you can give them your body I am home to 458 little creatures.
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mishkakagehishka · 8 months
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"We're old moms, we can't wait to stop breastfeeding so we can get [very excited, shrill even] botooooox!!!"
We are never making it out of the patriarchy.
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zhongrin · 6 months
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torn between telling the truth and asking to push tomorrow's date to sunday and risking him being grossed out, or soldiering through tomorrow and forcing myself to attend and risk having the worst date ever from all the pain.
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fate-defiant · 1 year
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I think fakiru would still be best friends after divorce
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