#Borrower!Remus

[royalthorned]

remus/nagini

imagine a disheveled and dehumanised woman with fake high society values and aesthetics meeting a beat up, mourning and over educated long limbed man. they are outcast for outcast, beastly in a tasteless way.

now imagine they meet in the liminal space after they’ve lost their lovers. nagini carries her masters soul with her and remus carries sirius’ guilt. they are untethered and unruly. unwashed hair, empty stomachs and uncleaned rooms. the people who accepted them for their monstrousness are gone and they are wild again.

they live sporadically together in remus’ dilapidated berlin apartment. nagini stays with the carrows in their wind swept seaside cottage and in the lestrange manor on the the dust coated floor of the attic.

nagini was purposely never given a formal education to keep her “animalistic” and remus is an overeducated aspiring teacher. they sit at his tea stained, chipped table learning basic charms and muggle east asian history together. nagini makes perfect tea and buys him ornamental coasters to drink on while studying.

they sit together in his cracked bath in lukewarm yellow water together for hours. nagini shampoos his hair and laughs when he shakes his head like a dog.

there’s something so simple to their love. they are similar and accepted in a way they never have been before. all the love they give to each other is a gift and they know it. it’s rare to be seen and loved when your soulmates has left you but here they are! demure, vicious beasts sitting side by side eating unbuttered toast.

[moonyfr]

The amount of fics I want to re-read, the amount of fics I want to finish reading, and the amount of fics I want to start reading is very impractical atm

[theokusgallery]

Hiiii I saw you say you have Notes on your Remus and Janus designs 👀👀?

Could we see/hear some tidbits?

FOR SURE !! Here's what the original doodles for their designs look like, first off, (I know you didn't ask for Virgil but I did these three at the same time)

When I drew this I had just finished an exam and had to wait another hour until I could leave the classroom, so I wrote down enough notes that I had to flip the page instead:

Virgil:

- Virgil has light brown hair that he dyes black (badly). It is essential that the dye job look like shit. It looks artificial, his roots are showing, there's patches where the color didn't take, etc etc.

- He also has blue eyes, which I decided on mostly because it makes it even more clear that his hair isn't naturally black.

- He wears earrings, but his ears aren't actually pierced — they're fake little little clip-on things.

- He wears black nail polish at all times, but it's always chipped because he gets the cheapest stuff he can get his hands on.

- His hair (especially his bangs) get very long at times because he gets too socially anxious to go to the hairdresser. Back in middle school, he used to have Janus cut them for him (Remus could have done a better job but trusting him with scissors would have been a mistake). Now he mostly cuts it off by himself — it looks about as good as his dye job.

- Virgil's purple hoodie is a leftover from Remus' fashion design endeavors that Remus thought didn't look weird enough.

Janus:

- He has naturally strawberry blonde hair. The length is very important to him — he started growing it towards the end of middle school. (He allows Remus to experiment with hairdos sometimes as long as he doesn't cut anything off. I need to draw that sometime)

- I'm not entirely settled on his eye color. I know at least one of his eyes is a very pretty brown, but I have half a mind to give him a yellow glass eye for his left side — I'm not sure it'd make any logistic sense for his situation, though

- He got his ears actually pierced when he was 16.

- He also may or may not have a forked tongue. Not sure how I'd ever be able to show that off — but if he does have one, then Remus definitely was the one to encourage him to do it.

- His fashion style was definitely influenced by being around Remus (who may have used him as a mannequin/dummy because he's small.) so much. Remus also attempted to make clothes for him, but Janus is very fancy and picky, so he doesn't wear those clothes very often (though he might accessorize with stuff Remus made for him occasionally).

Remus:

- He has naturally very dark hair. He uses temporary/surface level dyes a lot, but if he's using permanent or semi-permanent dyes, he's usually limiting himself to the grey streak — it's kind of a sample strand, since it's already bleached. He 100% copied his hairstyle from Roman's.

- He (and Roman, of course) has greenish blue eyes.

- Janus paid for him to get his ears (and eyebrows) professionally pierced because otherwise he was just going to do it himself with a sewing needle.

- He has a lot of very shitty stick-and-poke tattoos he made/makes on himself. They're almost always hidden by his outfits.

- Speaking of which, Remus makes most of his outfits costumes himself. The quality of the work may vary, but they are always way too over-the-top for casual wear, because he stands out anyway, so... in for a penny, right. (As I said in the tags of a post: he is very creative and has no shame or social anxiety at all, so he had his whole aesthetic ("overdramatic green") figured out by the time he was 13)

- He also has SH scars, but, again — they're hidden by his outfits 99% of the time. He's a slut who never shows an inch of skin

[nettedtangible]

I’m not really one for having Sirius feel extremely upset by Jegulus yknow. Like I genuinely feel like that “you’re defiling my little brother” shit is weird and paternalistic and not something Sirius would care about (my boy is sex positive!!)

BUT, In a scenario where Sirius does get upset by Jegulus, I think it would go like this:

All his life, Sirius was put down by his parents, compared to Regulus. They never stopped talking about his potential, upset that he wasn’t living up to their expectations.

He was the golden child and the scapegoat. The weight of everything was on his shoulders, and Regulus just… got it easier. He didn’t have to work as hard for their approval, but he also didn’t have as much of their esteem. Regulus was in every way a spare. And while Reg resented it because he could never live up to his big brother, Sirius resented it because Reg never got the shit that he did. If Regulus made a mistake, it was just a passing moment. If Sirius made a mistake, it was picked apart and lorded over him.

And when Sirius finally decided he’d had enough and that he wasn’t going to try to impress them anymore, he turned to his brother and asked him to join him. To reject their approval and to actually try to make amends in their relationship. But Regulus was finally getting a bit of glory. Their parents eyes were finally turning from Sirius onto him. So he lorded it over Sirius, seeing it as some kind of victory, neglecting the idea that Sirius was doing it on purpose, and buying his own hype that he’d somehow surpassed his supernova of a brother.

And Sirius would hate it. He would resent Regulus for choosing them and their meaningless approval over him. That he would value such empty praise over his own brother who was there for him more than their parents ever were.

And then BAM Jegulus happens and Sirius’ whole world is spinning out. Because how could James like Regulus? Does James like Regulus more than him? Doesn’t James understand how much Regulus hurt him. Doesn’t James remember holding him every time he cried?? Why on earth would James take Regulus’ side??

Is Sirius going to lose James just like he lost his brother? Will Regulus make it a competition for James’ affections just like he did their parents?? Will he undermine Sirius and James’ relationship at every turn just so he can ostensibly beat Sirius again??

Does Regulus even like James or is this just another one of his bullshit one-sided competitions?? And surely James wouldn’t be foolish enough to fall for it right!? But James is kind, and soft, and trusting. And he doesn’t know Regulus like Sirius does. He didn’t see the little smirks Regulus would give him from behind their mother's back when Sirius was getting screamed at. The same smirk Regulus gives him now behind James’ back after they kiss. And oh god can’t Sirius have ONE THING?! Why must Regulus take everything from him, covet everything good that he manages to carve out for himself.

And oh god now he and Remus are getting along too! What if it isn't enough to just have James? What if Regulus wants to destroy his relationship with Remus too?? And anytime he freaks out about it to his boyfriend, warning him to be careful, pleading for him not to get too close to Regulus, he gets a kiss on the forehead and a soothing 'you're being crazy Pads.' And no one around him is taking his concerns seriously, and they're all looking at him like he's crazy and paranoid but they didn't see the look in Regulus' eyes when he was six and broke Sirius' favourite toy just because he could.

And doesn't Regulus know Sirius would just share it with him, if he asked. If he hadn't made it into a competition between them from the day he was born? Doesn't he know how much Sirius wants to show him?

He never wanted to be in competition. He never wanted to be their stupid golden boy. He only ever wanted to be himself. And now James is going to be ripped away from him and discarded like some used up toy just so Regulus can prove some useless point about being enough. When he was always enough for Sirius.

[edupunkn00b]

A Modern Family

Written for the wonderful @just-some-gt-trash as part of the @sanderssidesgiftxchange. I'm sorry pinch-hitting meant your gift was late but it meant I got to play in a fun world! I hope you enjoy this little tale.

Rated: G - WC: 4078 - CW: mentions of rodents and spiders -

Christmas and New Year's over, the nights were still long and cold. The forecasters' over-promised snow fell softly outside the windows of the Sanders brothers' house. 'Spring' semester started next week at Logan’s school, so he and Patton had decided this would be a good evening to finally take down their holiday decorations and start to prepare for the new year ahead.

Seeded with a small box of keepsakes from their grandparents, they’d managed to accumulate quite the collection over the past six years, so they’d started early that evening in the hopes of completing their task before bed.

But even the best laid plans can fail. They’d only partially dismantled the tree and cleared the mantle, with candles and stockings and bric-à-brac filling three boxes to the brim, when Patton suddenly yawned, both arms stretched high over his head.

“Wow, Logie,” he said past another drawn out yawn. “I’m feeling like an old drum.”

Logan rolled his eyes at his brother’s old joke but couldn’t quite stifle his snort.

“I’m gonna head to bed,” Patton continued, too tired to notice Logan’s rare acknowledgement of his pun. He hefted up the stack of boxes he’d set behind the couch. “I’ll take these up,” he said, darting for the stairs.

Logan half-turned toward him, one arm wrapped with the singular string of tree lights he’d successfully detangled. “Would you like some—”

“No!” Patton interrupted. He fumbled the boxes, the top jiggling as he scrabbled for a better handhold  “No, I’ve got ‘em,” he said, laughing. “The boxes.” His face pinked and he shrugged his burden with a grin. “The boxes, I mean.”

“Yes,” Logan nodded. “I can see that.” Perhaps sleep was best for him. “Good night, then, Pat.”

Patton was half-way up the stairs before he’d finished his sentence.

“‘Night, Logie!” he called over his shoulder just before the big closet upstairs slammed shut. Patton’s own bedroom door soon followed and Logan was left alone in the quiet living room.

~

It took Logan just over another hour to detangle and rewind the last of the tree lights and he stood back to assess their progress. The room was nearly restored to its standard appearance. There were now a few more books on the shelves and two new video games beneath the console. An unsealed tray of candied nuts sat on the coffee table, just next to the new coasters Logan had bought ‘for the house.’

Both gifts had been for the house. That's what the tags had said, at least. While the coasters were intended as a gentle reminder for Patton to not set drinking glasses down where their condensation would leave rings on unprotected surfaces, the sweet treats were really gift for their closest neighbors.

Their very closest neighbors.

Last July, he and Patton had moved in to their not-so-new house—‘It has good bones!’ the real estate agent had crowed. And, despite the rare-but-too-frequent-for-Patton appearances of tiny spiders throughout the house, they'd agreed. Their new home was large, with plenty of space for Logan’s third floor office overlooking the woods and Patton’s chicken coop in the backyard. Despite the high ceilings and many windows, the thick, well-insulated walls had kept them comfortably cool on even the hottest days.

It hadn’t been until September, on the first chilly night of the year, that Logan had begun to suspect they weren’t the only mammals living within its walls.

At first Logan had surmised his brother’s less-than-fastidious kitchen habits had led to a minor rodent infestation. Small amounts of food had began to go missing. He’d found opened cracker boxes with long, thin slits torn into their linings. Patton’s Nutter Butters ran out faster than typical and a hole sprouted near the bottom of his bagged coffee beans. They never found any droppings or teeth marks, so they simply repackaged everything in airtight containers and didn’t think much more of it.

Until October came.

It was midterm season and Logan had a thick stack of essays waiting for him on his desk. While requiring students to hand-write their exams in class had proved an effective deterrent against AI drivel, it meant more work for him in grading—and deciphering—over two hundred essays written with varying levels of coherence and legibility. Waiting for that evening’s fourth cup of coffee to brew, he’d removed his eyeglasses and leaned back against the counter, relishing a moment of required rest.

“You know,” a tiny voice drawled a few inches from his ear. “I’ve been meaning to talk to you about your new coffee tin.”

He jolted up, barely avoiding the now-simmering kettle, and found himself eye-to-eye with… a person. A very smallperson.

“What?” Logan ripped off his eyeglasses and polished them on his sweater. Hands shaking, he replaced them and stepped closer, staring. “What are you?”

“Excuse you,” the little creature harrumphed, smoothing the sleeves of a tiny overcoat. “I am a who, not a ‘what.’”

Logan blinked at the creature for a long moment and it snapped its fingers inches from his nose. “Hel-lo? Anyone home?” When Logan still couldn’t quite find his words, it sighed. “It appears Remus was wrong about you. He said you could handle it but I knew we should have—”

“Remus? You—he? There’s more—”

Logan’s sputtering was cut off by the kettle's screech. Hands covering its—his? Their?—ears, it jumped down from the shelf and stomped on the switch, silencing the whistle. The action shook free the logjam of thoughts in Logan’s brain. “How did you know to do that?”

“Oh, look, he finally speaks,” the little creature murmured, one eyebrow cocked. “Well, I’ve watched you often enough.”

“You’ve…” Logan shuddered as he glanced around the kitchen, every shadow, every nook and cranny looming and large. “You’ve been watching us?”

“Yes, of course w—” The creature cut themself off, large—for their face—eyes suddenly widening before falling back to a more languid shape. “Look at us,” they said, gesturing between them.  “Your size makes you remarkably more threatening to me than I could ever be to you.”

“You could poison me,” Logan blurted out. “Or nick my carotid artery or cause me to aspirate Vaseline—”

Both hands pressed over their belly, the little creature laughed, an incongruously cheerful sound that halted Logan’s litany faster than anything else could have. “While I appreciate the list…” they said when they finally caught their breath. They wiped tiny tears from the corners of their eyes, soaking the butter yellow gloves they wore. “That would mean murdering the best resource w—I’ve had in years.”

“Resource?” Logan repeated, lowering into a crouch to once again get to eye-level with the creature. Looking closer at the gloves, he recognized the material of his favorite proctoring tie. The creature’s waistcoat looked suspiciously like the tie he wore now. Frowning, he examined the material of his own. The silk was completely unmarred, but bringing it closer to the creature’s clothing, the match was undeniable.

“No need to worry, I’d sooner go naked than damage your lovely neckwear.” The creature smiled—knowingly, infuriatingly, with a little gleam in their eyes. He stroked the edge of his tie. “You never use the coordinating pocket squares.”

“I thought…”

Patton’s confused grin when Logan had thanked him after his last run to Goodwill suddenly made sense. When the small stack of unworn handkerchiefs and pocket squares in the back of his closet had disappeared, Logan had assumed Patton included them in his donation. He now understood just where they'd really gone.

“You’re behind the missing food,” he whispered, the creature’s comment about his coffee canister replaying in his mind.

“Perhaps Remus was right after all,” the creature murmured and offered their hand, palm side-ways. Carefully, softly, Logan pinched the offered hand between the pad of his thumb and index finger in a simulacrum of a handshake. “My name is Janus,” the creature smiled. “And we need to have a talk about your new food storage system.”

Over shared coffee—Janus carried his own miniature mug clipped to the pack slung across his back—they discussed how difficult it had become for Janus and his friend, Remus, to gather food from their kitchen. Ever since Logan and Patton had begun their anti-rodent measures in the kitchen, their small neighbors had been left to subsist on literal crumbs and the rare windfalls when Patton had left a package or treat out for longer than usual. After much discussion and negotiation, he and Janus crafted an agreement that both kept the kitchen sanitary and their little neighbors safe and well-fed.

“Besides,” Janus had murmured, sipping happily at his second cup of coffee. “Remus takes great pleasure in slaughtering any sort of pest that might dare enter this home.” He waggled his head, considering his words, before adding. “Excepting, of course, spiders,” he said, rolling his eyes. “He adores them.”

“Yes, we’ve seen a few,” Logan grimaced. “Though, as frightened as Patton is of them, he would never kill them.”

Smiling that strange smile again, Janus nodded. “So we’ve noticed,” he finally said. “To be honest, that restraint was the only thing that left me confident to approach you without fear of being squashed on sight.”

~

And so began a very different sort of routine. Each night, Logan would wash and refill a small, shallow container with bits of fruit and meats and bread along with several coffee beans. Occasionally, he’d include a small sachet of loose tea or other treats of chocolate and candies Patton had recently made.

Water was trickier, but after some experimentation, Logan had installed a small rodent-sized water feeder in an upper cabinet, threading the bent barrel through a small hole he’d drilled in the back wall when Patton was out shopping. He sanitized it every two days and refilled it with fresh water each night.

His brother held a deep compassion for animals, that same compassion that kept Logan from using bait or traps or, worse, a cat, to manage their presumed rodent problem. Janus was confident Patton's compassion would overrule his even deeper fear of 'creepy, crawl death dealers' and slow a violent reaction should either suddenly appear before him.

Logan did not share Janus' confidence and extracted promises from each of them to stay out of his brother’s sight entirely.

Remus, dressed in a shiny green-and-black striped jester suit newly stitched together from a regrettably ink-stained necktie, had been reluctant to promise. In the end, though, he’d been convinced by Patton’s well-timed shriek at the discovery of a spider in the upstairs bath.

Perhaps that is why, when Logan sealed another box of decorations and happened upon the green-and-black pant leg sticking out from beneath the couch, he had only sighed and tapped his foot. “Remus?” he called quietly, eyes darting automatically to the stairs to guard against a surprise arrival from Patton. “Remus what are you doing under there?”

When Remus remained unresponsive, he tapped again, a little harder. “Remus?” he repeated, the unnatural stillness unnerving. “Remus, are you alri—” Cupping his hand, he gently scooped up the small creature and freed him from beneath the couch.

And nearly dropped him. Well, it. Clad in Remus’ green and black outfit was the similarly-sized Elf-on-a-shelf figurine Patton had jokingly purchased just after Thanksgiving.

“Oh, no,” Logan whispered, clutching the small doll to his chest. “Remus?” he hissed, pushing up to his feet. “Remus, where are you?” He scanned the room, checking all the corners where the duo liked to hide as they joined in on his and Patton’s movie nights, checked the bookcase where he’d arranged a reversed magnifier close to the smallest volumes in his collection to ease their reading. Nothing.

Finally, his eyes dragged up to the shelf where said Elf sat all December.

Completely cleared.

Patton had packed up all the knick-knacks and decorations hours ago. Remus couldn’t be hiding there. “Remus?” he tried again.

“He isn’t home. Hasn’t been all day.” Janus’ voice carried from a crack in the wall, tight with worry. “He went out early in the morning but should be back by now. I don’t know where he is.”

Janus stepped out from their hidden doorway into the living room. Hat crooked and his knees dusty, never before had Janus appeared so not put together. Dirt smudged his cheek and loose threads hung from the cuff of his left glove. “I’ve looked everywhere. I can’t find him.”

“Oh, Jay…” Logan whispered and moved to scoop him up. “We’ll find him together. I think…” His eyes flicked upstairs. “I think Patton might have packed him with the Christmas decorations. But we must hurry. He—”

Janus’ eyes, already glossy, grew wide. “All that bubblewrap? And if he breaks out to breathe and Patton sees him, he might—”

“We'll find him," Logan promised, holding him close before. "Let's go." Already headed for the stairs, at Janus' nod Logan slipped him into a deep pocket to hide and dashed up to the second floor.

~

Covers pulled up over his head with the space beneath illuminated by his phone’s flashlight, Patton lay, belly down, on his bed. His stockinged feet switched between resting on his pillow and kicking the edge of the blanket as he laughed.

And unwrapped another chocolate for Remus.

“Okay, okay, okay, my turn,” he giggled. “Where does a general put his armies?”

Sprawled on his side with melted chocolate painting the edges of his mustache, Remus looked thoughtful for a moment, then grinned. “In the ground?”

“No!” Patton whisper-shrieked with a giggle. “In his sleevies!”

Falling onto his back and holding his belly, Remus laughed, the sweet tinkle matching the bells twitching on his borrowed hat and boots. Patton grinned as he broke off another tiny bit of his Ghirardelli square and passed it to him. He tapped one of the bells with another laugh. “I still can’t believe how long you managed to sit up on the mantlepiece.”

Eyebrows danced over wild eyes and Remus shrugged. “All your brother saw was the costume.”

Patton popped another chocolate into his own mouth and shook his head. “I thought for sure he caught me when he asked if I needed help with the box.” Reaching slowly, he dabbed at Remus’ face with the edge of his pajama sleeve, wiping away a tiny glob of chocolate. “You were laughing so loud!”

“Nah,” Remus leaned into Patton’s touch and curled against his hand. “Your brother’s so worried about you he wouldn’t notice if I’d stripped down in the middle of the living room.” Waggling his eyebrows, Remus winked. “He didn’t, did he?”

“That spider was suspiciously timed,” Patton murmured, stroking Remus’ hair back with the edge of his thumb.

Remus hummed, eyes falling shut. “Y’know they’re really not so bad when you give them a chance.”

“No, thank you!” Patton said for the millionth time. He twitched under the covers, just the thought of being near one of those horrible things sending an icy chill down his limbs.

Remus moved closer and hugged his hand. “Don’t worry, Pattycake,” he said, softer. “They won’t get too close to you.” His grin went sharp. “If they know what’s good for ‘em.”

“Thanks, Re,” he whispered. “You always know just what to—”

Patton froze at Logan’s sudden voice just outside his door. “Pat?” he called, voice low like he was afraid he’d wake him.

Pressing one finger to his lips, Patton drew Remus close and poked his head out from under the covers. He checked the time. He’d gone upstairs over two hours ago. Logan would expect him to be asleep by now, right?

Keeping Remus tucked against his chest so he wouldn’t squish him, Patton turned them around and lay back down under the covers, head now on the pillow. He’d just remembered to flip over his phone to hide the flashlight as Logan slowly opened the door.

“Pat?” he whispered into the darkness. Silhouetted by the hall light, Logan’s head turned from side to side as he peered into the room.

Rubbing his eyes with one hand—the other holding Remus under the covers—Patton put on a sleep-fuzzy voice. “Logie? You okay?”

“I am fine, I—I apologize for waking you, Patton.” He sounded rushed and… anxious.

Under the covers, Remus curled closer, stroking just over Patton’s sternum. He'd heard it, too. He wiggled against him, a welcome reminder he was still close and Patton took a steadying breath.

“Did something happen?”

“I—No. No, nothing to worry about, Patton.” He’d put on his calm, Big Bro voice. “I… I merely found a few additional items downstairs I’d neglected to pack away in the boxes you’d brought up. I went to find them and they weren’t all in the closet. I… Do you…”

He cleared his throat and Patton pulled Remus a little closer when he felt a snicker escape him. Logan didn’t seem to hear.

“Do you have the mantle box in here?” Logan finally asked, still in the doorway.

“Oh,” Patton giggled. That’s all he was worried about? “Oh, sure,” he said, sitting up a bit more and clicking on his bedside lamp. “By the dresser.” Relieved he’d thought to retape the box where he’d hidden Remus, he pointed freely.

Logan’s eyes widened when he saw the sealed box and he pounced on it, tearing at the tape.

“Logie?” Tucking Remus under the covers, he slid out of bed and moved to Logan’s side as he rifled through the box. He took out the bubble-wrapped snow globe and their stockings, along with the heavy copper hooks that held them in place. He pushed aside the ten years’ worth of Santa photos, the ice skating figurine, and the Phantom of the Opera music box that always played too loud.

Increasingly frantic, Logan’s fingers scraped the bottom of the box.

“Logie?” Patton asked again. “Are you looking for something?”

“Tell him!” A tiny voice—not Remus’ voice—came from Logan’s pocket.

Logan straightened, looking everywhere but at Patton.

“Who was that?” Patton asked and he swore he heard another of Remus’ little snickers from the bed.

“Wha—I—It—” Logan shook his head. “I didn’t hear anything. I am merely looking for—”

“Looking for me?” Remus called loudly from the bed, bells jangling.

The little voice swore from Logan's pocket. “Dammit, Remus!”

“Re!” Patton cried, moving to the bed.

“Re?” Logan repeated, grabbing for his hand before Patton got far. He finally met his eyes. “Re?” he asked again.

“The jig is up, Pattycake,” Remus laughed, shimmying down the comforter and dropping to the carpeted floor with the whisper of a thud. Pulling back from Logan, Patton rushed to meet him. He scooped him up and gently cradled him in both hands, over-sized elf costume bouncing with the movement. He brought him closer for Logan to see.

“Yes. 'Re.' Logan, this is Remus,” he admitted. “He won’t hurt you. He's friendly!”

Sitting criss-cross on Patton’s palm, Remus waved and blew a kiss at Logan. “Hey there, Lo Lo!”

“I know who he is!” Logan cried, hand to his head. “How do you know who he is?”

“You know!?”

“Of course he knows!” The other voice said and a tiny head popped out from Logan’s pocket.

“Oh, hi, Jannie,” Remus said, sounding guilty for the first time that evening.

The tiny person in Logan’s pocket—so this was the friend Remus had talked about—tapped Logan’s side and he moved to retrieve him. Palms flat and close to his chest, he carried him on his hands in a near match to how Patton held Remus.

Though instead of sitting comfortably as Remus did, the other—Jannie—clung to Logan’s tie with one hand and stood, glaring at Remus. “Do you have even a concept of how worried we were?”

“What?” Remus’ grin scrunched into actual concern and he tugged Patton’s sleeve to move closer. “I told you I was going to go see my boyfriend!”

“I thought you meant the orb spider in the backyard!”

Patton shivered at the memory of the spindly striped legs of the giant spider under the deck railing out back. Nestled close to the dryer vent, it had found a cozy spot to spin its webs for the winter.

Remus was quick to soothe him, though, tiny fingers scritchting his palm. “Don’t worry, Patton, it’s not like that with Charlie.”

“Aw, Re…” Patton bowed his head to brush the very lightest of kisses against the top of his head. He must’ve ditched the hat somewhere along his path down from Patton’s bed. “I don’t own you. Just… don’t bring him home, okay?”

“Deal,” Remus grinned, settling back against his palm.

“Wait a minute!”

All eyes turned to Logan. Eyes wild and each cheek dotted with an angry red spot, he looked ready to burst. Remus nodded to Janus in warning just before jumping over to join him on Logan’s hand. Then he climbed up his sleeve and all the way up to his head. Laying on his stomach, he moved his arms and legs, massaging his scalp. Janus followed a similar path up his other arm but stopped on his shoulder, gently stroking his jaw.

Patton took Logan's now-empty hand.

“You’ve got our attention, Lo Lo,” Remus said, voice only slightly muffled by Logan’s hair.

“Patton,” he began through clenched teeth. He searched his eyes. “How long have you known?”

Guilt pricked his belly and he squeezed Logan’s hand. “I met Remus just after your classes started.”

“What!?” Janus cried, glaring up at Remus on top of Logan’s head. “So when you said we should tell Logan first, Patton already knew?”

Remus gave him his best smile and shrugged.

“Yeah…” He twirled a bit of Logan’s hair in his hands. “I thought it’d be funny.” Logan looked like he wanted to be mad, but Remus’ fiddling seemed to have the same effect on Logan as it had on him. His shoulders had dropped, arms only loosely crossed over his chest but then he’d frown, jaw suddenly clenched. It wouldn't last, though.

“I didn’t think anybody’d be able to keep the secrets up this long,” Remus explained after a moment. “I’m proud of you, Pattycake.” He winked and, despite the lingering annoyance in his brother’s gaze, Patton couldn’t stop his cheeks from warming.

Logan sighed and looked up, head tilted ever so slightly. “Remus, precisely how long ago did you make this particular change?” he asked, voice softer now.

“Oh, this?” he grinned, waggling his arms until the elf’s too-long sleeves flapped over his hands. The bells on the felt boots jangled with the movement. “This was just today.”

Logan’s brow furrowed. “I am disappointed in my lack of awareness and attention to detail,” he murmured and Janus slid closer, pressing a kiss just under his ear.

“Remus can be quite stealthy when he wishes to be,” he said. Scowling, his tiny face looked stern but pride warmed his voice. “You might be surprised by how often he’s been able to catch even me unawares.”

Remus shimmied back down and jumped to Logan’s shoulder. “It’s a gift,” he laughed and reached for Patton.

He gathered him up and smiled at his brother. “So now the secret’s out, maybe we can all go downstairs?” Looking at Janus happily perched on Logan’s shoulder, he grinned. His newest friend bowed his head in return with a matching smile. “Get everyone acquainted?”

“Hm? Ye—yes,” Logan blinked, glancing between him and Patton. “Yes, of course.” But the wheels still turned behind his eyes. “There was something you said…” he murmured and moved Janus to his palm. Arms outstretched, he peered at each of them in turn. “Remus, you said you’d gone to see your boyfriend.”

“Well, yeah,” Remus grinned, laying across Patton’s shoulder. He tickled his neck, laughing at the little squeak Patton couldn’t quite hide.

“Boyfriend.” Logan repeated, one eyebrow raised.

“Doesn’t seem all that different from you, Big Bro,” Patton grinned back. Janus half-sat, half-lay on Logan’s palm, smiling as Logan’s thumb seemed to unconsciously stroke his back.

Logan followed his gaze and blushed.

“Perhaps, well…” He cleared his throat. “Well, yes, I suppose that would not be… inaccurate,” he said, cheeks pinker than Patton had seen them in years. “Tea?” he asked, changing the subject and heading out into the hall. Janus’ low chuckle carried back to them and Patton followed, Remus on his shoulder.

“How ‘bout a hot toddy?” he called back.

“Remus!”

~

And, for a treat, here's one of the poses Remus kept up for over an hour on that mantle piece.

Credit: Photographer unknown, from an elf on the shelf posting found on Facebook Marketplace

[tsspromptmonth]

Hi, I’m back to request a second order because I enjoyed my first one a lot. This time I would like to order a Ristretto with 2% milk, Peach, Kiwi, Starfruit, and Espresso syrup, and crushed animal cookies and aloe vera jellies for toppings.

(Giant/Tiny Au with hurt/comfort, featuring Patton, Remus, Janus, Remy, with the tropes of animal traits, and “I didn’t know where else to go.”)

I made 5 comments for a 500 word fic.

Fics on AO3 that I commented on:

plenty of fish in the sea by PanicAtTheEverywhere (elfzhyza) https://archiveofourown.org/collections/sleepy_bean_fanfic_cafe_2024/works/60249565

Space Brothers by KieraElieson https://archiveofourown.org/works/60276034

A Time of Gods (And Men!) by wickedcompanion https://archiveofourown.org/works/60271312

As Above, So Below by KieraElieson https://archiveofourown.org/works/60250324

Cozy Sweaters by Ended_Flames https://archiveofourown.org/works/59329588

Order Up!

Friends in Weird Places by @typically-untypical

[delimeful]

mere monstrosity (3)

warnings: spider, mild blood & injury, remus-typical death and gore mentions, misunderstandings

-

Remus knew this place was going to be the perfect new home the moment they entered the walls.

It hadn’t looked like much from the outside, sure, but the hollow wall interior was absolutely littered with enough cobwebs and old spiderwebs to mummify a borrower.

As someone with a twin brother to torment, Remus mentally tucked that visual away for future pranks and/or lifelong trauma.

“Oh, excellent,” said the unwitting future victim in question, looking at the nails driven into the wood in a classic borrower staircase pattern. “That’ll make exploring much easier. Maybe we’ll have neighbors!”

Roman was, as always, an incurable optimist. The two of them didn’t tend to have neighbors for long. Remus couldn’t imagine why; he was a delight, and Roman was funny enough to be tolerable.

Case in point, he ran a hand along the metal lining of one of the smaller support beams and grimaced at the thick coat of dust and grime. “Perhaps not the cleanest of neighbors.”

“That’s what I like to hear,” Remus replied, shooting his brother an unhinged grin before hurling his pack directly at him, knocking him clean over. “Dibs on the biggest crevice!”

“Oh, you mudstained scourge of the earth—,” Roman started, shoving the bag off himself and scrambling to his feet.

Halfway up the wall, taking the precarious nail stairway two steps at a time, Remus made one of his top five favorite obscene gestures and continued up and around the corner with glee.

The spooky aura only intensified as he scampered down the narrow pathways, shadowy corners with the barest glints of spiderweb strands tucked into every nook and cranny. No corpses yet, but one could always hope.

Roman’s voice had already faded into the distance; Remus had always been the faster between the two of them, particularly with his complete lack of regard for safety when it came to parkouring around any and all potential obstacles.

His Royal Slowpokeness would catch up eventually. How long it would take depended on how soon he remembered to ditch his own pack now that they were out of the elements.

There was a little peephole cleverly carved into a knot of this wall’s baseboard, and Remus paused to take a gander.

A fairly normal living room, to his disappointment. With any luck, the humans would still be entertaining to watch. If they weren’t, Remus wasn’t above sowing a little discord and watching the resulting fallout.

Moving on, he noticed that there were corpses cropping up now, even if they were only of the small insect variety. They didn’t seem as desiccated as the earlier webs; was there still a spider living here? A whole cluster of them, even?

Roman would have an aneurysm. Remus grinned at the idea, hauling himself up onto one of the higher support beams and peering down at the musty dark below as he skipped along it.

There probably weren’t really that many, especially since Remus hadn’t seen even a teensy tiny one yet. Not that he had to tell Roman that.

“Um,” a voice ahead of him started, “please don’t freak out.”

Now, there was a sentence that almost always preceded something interesting and/or freaky! Remus’s head snapped around with eager anticipation.

It took a moment to spot them properly— Remus had assumed the voice was coming from another borrower, and had started scanning the area at his eye level or lower, since he was on the taller side for a borrower.

As it turned out, he should have started high.

Because lurking in the shadows over the next support beam was a stranger that was a good arms’ length taller than Remus. One that had about half a dozen too many legs to be your standard borrower.

“Holy shit, it’s Spiderman!” Remus crowed, nearly vibrating with excitement.

The stranger looked like something out of an old storybook, with a mostly normal upper half stacked on top of a sizable tarantula body. They were wearing a patched up hoodie, but from what he could see, the transition from human to spider was seamless, like one of those part-horse people from the fantasy movies their last house had been so into. A spider centaur.

They didn’t seem set to charge at him like some more aggressive breeds of spiders would, expression pinched but not angry. Their front legs were lifted slightly in defensive alarm, but their human arms were also lifted, palms out, in a ‘don’t attack’ sort of gesture.

Or a preparation to attack, if they could shoot webbing from their hands like the spiderguy from the movies.

Either way, Remus strode closer, his grin widening to painful. “What are you? Do you live here? Do you eat borrowers? Are you going to dissolve my organs?”

The spidercentaur skittered back slightly, eyes going wide. This was a fairly standard response to Remus, really, but he couldn’t deny a tinge of pride at the fact that he could induce it in even spider monster creatures considerably larger than him.

“No!” he blurted, spider legs lifting higher for a moment before they regathered their wits. “I mean, no, I don’t eat people. I’m— I’m not going to hurt you.”

Sounded like there weren’t any mummified borrowers already here after all. Bummer.

“Aw, boo,” Remus said, slowing his pace slightly in hopes of making his new friend less skittish. This was one neighbor he absolutely didn’t want to scare off. “You’ve really never wanted to bite any annoying new neighbors?”

Spiderguy blinked a few times, but ultimately answered, “I don’t typically have neighbors long enough to get annoyed by them. Not ones my size, anyhow.”

If most borrowers couldn’t handle Remus, it made sense that they wouldn’t properly appreciate a horrifying spidercentaur as a wallmate, either. Wait, did that last bit imply they’d felt the urge to bite annoying humans? Oh, this was going to be so fun.

First, though, they needed to be reassured that their days of accidental terror-induced isolation were over. They’d figure out pretty quickly that Remus was harder to scrape off than chewed gum on the bottom of a shoe. Grosser, too.

“Well, you’re in luck!” he informed them, bounding forward once more with the half-formed intention of standing on his toes and attempting to sling an arm around their shoulders. “I consider myself something of a professional nuisance, so you’ll have opportunities abound to get annoyed and—!”

Spiderguy’s expression went alarmed, and they reached forward with the first syllables of a warning on their tongue, but Remus had already stepped forward and found nothing but empty air.

He toppled off the support beam with a comical screech, and felt his downward momentum stalled for the briefest moment by the unmistakable sensation of clinging spiderweb.

The angle of his descent changed, but the velocity didn’t, and he barely even registered the change before he was slamming, skull first, into something solid enough to make him see stars.

Wow, he thought in his last half-second of consciousness, it looks like I was the mummified borrower corpse all along.

—

Roman had utterly and totally lost track of his wayward twin.

This was both a common occurrence and a deeply unfortunate one.

Especially since there might be other borrowers living here. Ones that were in no way prepared to face the full impact of Remus’s unexpected presence without Roman there to soften the blow.

“Remus!” he tried to shout, but it came out as more of a wheeze as he pushed himself up the latest set of stairs. “I’m going to write you out of my will, you atrocious little abomination!”

No response. Not even the distant ruckus of Remus flinging himself over lethal falls with gleeful abandon.

They were so going to get kicked out within the day. Roman was tired of running around in the muck and dodging errant wildlife at every hour, dammit! He wanted to take a day-long nap, drink some tap-cold water, and steal cute fabrics from humans! Probably even in that order!

Huffing in frustration, he strode forward, shivering with disgust as a web strand grazed his arm.

This place was practically cloaked in them; his desperate hope that they wouldn’t have to deal with any creepy crawlies was dying a slow, agonized death the further he went.

If anyone did live here, they might be just as content with the disgusting and distressing as Remus was. The thought made him shudder. One of his brother was more than enough for the world. In fact, he’d rather deal with the spiders.

Half a foot ahead, where the hall ended, movement caught his gaze. Roman stopped dead.

A single, huge, hairy appendage was poking out from around the corner. After a moment, another joined it. And another.

Roman took it back. He took it back so hard.

Despite his sudden realization that two of Remus would be fine actually, the unmistakably arachnid legs continued to edge out in front of him, bringing with them a round thorax that was almost as big as him on its own.

Swallowing thickly, Roman reached up to silently grab the hilt of his sword. He suddenly wished he had something more versatile than his classic sewing pin saber.

The tarantula crept further into view, and Roman blanched at the sight of a very non-arachnid head and torso attached to the spider, its form slightly bent over as it slowly dragged something along with it.

Forget weird neighbors. There were actual monsters in this house.

It was only years of practice keeping his volume down even in the most heated of arguments with his brother that let him wrangle down a shriek loud enough for humans three houses over to hear.

As a result, the actual sound he produced was something like a strangled yelp, too quiet to make it past the walls, but more than enough to make the monster’s head snap around.

“Uh,” it said eloquently, and dropped what it’d been dragging around the corner. “This isn’t what it looks like?”

The odd thump of it hitting the ground finally tore his gaze away from those too-many legs, and Roman looked down to see Remus.

His brother, uncannily silent. Face slack and body unmoving. Half of him covered in thick strands of webbing.

There was blood trailing down one side of his face.

Roman wasn’t sure precisely what his face did in response to the sight, but it was telling enough to make the monster scramble back a few steps, hands raising in faux-innocence.

His former terror had transmuted into something sharper. Something far more dangerous.

“Hold on, I swear—,” it started.

Roman drew his sword, and it was smart enough to stop talking and start running.

—

Virgil was going to die from the stupidest misunderstanding imaginable.

He scrambled down the nearest set of support struts so quickly he almost tripped over his own legs, ignoring the instincts shrieking in the back of his mind that demanded he go up.

A very determined borrower could get just about anywhere a spider could climb, and if Virgil got cornered, he was screwed.

A stab from a pointed skewer like that wasn’t guaranteed to hit one of his lower organs on the first try, but the odds were uncomfortably high. It would be a slow, painful, internal-bleeding sort of death.

No, what he needed wasn’t some shadowy nook to get trapped in. He needed open space, the unsheltered kind that most wall-dwellers avoided like the plague.

Mostly because it was just as likely to get one killed as the plague. If this had happened a month ago, Virgil wouldn’t have even dreamed of a plan like this. He would have gladly taken the inevitable stabbing over rushing out into the humans’ living room, scurrying over the exposed carpet for all to see.

Especially since he knew exactly who was sitting at the desk in the corner of the room at this time of day, right on schedule.

The other borrower was still following him with the sort of intensity that suggested he wanted nothing more than Virgil’s head on a pike.

Seeing as he looked eerily similar to the borrower that Virgil had been lugging around the bloody unconscious body of, the assumption was probably pretty spot-on.

The entrance he was seeking was dead ahead, and he couldn’t help the surge of relief as he bolted through it, tearing the wallpaper a little further in the process. It felt unnatural to reveal himself so brazenly, but Virgil imagined being stabbed would feel worse.

He didn’t actually have to go all the way over to the desk, not when any borrower with sense would surely stop at the doorway, but he didn’t know what else to do, and his nerves were already too fried to feel his usual anxiety about interacting with a human.

Wait. Any borrower with sense—

Virgil twisted to check over his shoulder, and yelped at the sight of his pursuer, still right on his tail.

“Are you crazy?” he demanded, his heart pounding as he scrambled away on half-numb legs.

“Nobody tries to murder my brother and gets away with it,” the borrower shouted at him, lifting his sword higher as he charged.

Virgil flinched back, sure that he was moments away from sharp, blinding pain—

A shadow fell over them, and he opened his eyes in time to see the borrower’s expression drop into sheer terror before a wall slammed between them with a ground-shaking thump.

Virgil’s limbs curled up automatically, even as he recognized the interceding wall— an oversized hand. He followed the connected arm up, craning his neck to stare up at the face of the human looming over them.

Oh. The humans looming over them.

“Stop that immediately,” Logan commanded, his expression just as thunderous as his voice. His other hand was cupped, hovering just shy of Virgil as though entirely prepared to bodily shelter him from danger.

It should have felt dangerous, but when Virgil’s legs moved, it was to shuffle just a little further under the shadow of that protective hand.

Standing behind Logan, Janus looked Virgil over intently for a moment before sliding his narrow gaze towards the borrower.

“I’d listen,” he leaned forward over Logan’s shoulder with a sharp-edged smile that promised nothing but trouble. “Unless, of course, you’d prefer to try your luck with a more willing opponent.”

Virgil felt a sense of foreboding as he watched the situation begin to spiral entirely out of control. He’d fled the walls in the hopes that with some distance forced between them, the situation would defuse enough to explain the misunderstanding. Instead, he’d gotten his pursuer pinned under the attention of two blatantly pissed humans.

So much for good first impressions.

[padfootastic]

Tbh, I kinda figured that if Sirius and the Potters didn’t tell Remus about the switch because they suspected him (they knew the spy was someone in their inner circle + POA does have the line about Remus saying smth “not if they thought I was the spy” and Sirius going “sorry about that”) it would be because Remus, based on his secretive tendencies in canon, isn’t talking to them

yeah that line is what i was thinking of but i can’t seem to make it make sense because in my characterisation of j&s, if they even slightly thought they knew who the spy could be, i cannot imagine them just, what, waiting it out? not letting them into the big secret??? it just doesn’t click ykno?

and honestly, yeah. remus icing them out seems like the most plausible thing to me. im fleshing this out into a proper Thing for FoD, along with some lore for the fidelius as soul magic, bc i am unable to just let it be rn, but the biggest argument i can see is remus just. constantly keeping them at arms length and that being both a source of hurt and suspicion bc why wouldn’t he tell us??

[sunstxr]

James, holding up crumpled potions homework

James: is it possible to iron paper?

Remus: the steam might ruin it

James: steam? What kind of straight iron are you using?

Remus: as opposed to what, a gay iron?

James: …

[jaratedeguadalupe]

remus is one of those sibling who just stands in your doorway and then leaves without a word without closing the door 

[milkhoney531]

Sanders Sides Fanfic Masterlist

OMaM Series:

Ships in Series: Roman x Virgil, Logan x Remus, Patton x Janus

Of Monsters and Men (omam): Not everyone can pay for college, so it's not unheard of to join the military for the expenses. But despite careful planning and no real interest in the military, plans can go awry. The rise of the zombie apocalypse and vampire attacks were definitely not in these boys plans, especially since they can no longer persue their dreams, right? We'll see.

Neither Deity nor Man (ndnm): (SEQUEL TO "OF MONSTERS AND MEN") Death isn't always the end. It can be a new beginning as well. This is true for Janus. But even in death, there is trouble that lies in wait. Hiding in the dark. Can our boys come out on top? Or will they face a Fate worse than death?

Neither Gone nor Forgotten (ngnf): (TAKES PLACE AFTER "NEITHER DEITY NOR MAN" THIRD BOOK IN SERIES, FIRST BOOK IS "OF MONSTERS AND MEN") After choosing to be reborn, our favorite boys are scattered apart without their memories. Reborn in a new world where some are born with a superpower gene, or created to be supers. Will our boys survive such a world? Will they meet again? Or, once again, will their lives end much too soon?*

Easter Eggs and Epilogues (eeae): Having become deities and gaining access to the multiverse, our favorite boys now witness other universes and guide them to the afterlife as they discover what it means to no longer be human and navigate through issues they had ignored as new issues erupt around them. Fans of my stories might find this infrequent epilogue mini series a nice read. Especially if they have read my sanders sides au Of Monsters and Men, its sequel Neither Deity nor Man, and the triquel Neither Gone nor Forgotten, as these characters might have little easter egg appearances in some of my other works. This does contain spoilers to my other works, so proceed with caution. Due to the nature of this mini series it will have extremely infrequent updates due to it being full of epilogues of specific stories.*^

HoE Series:

Ships in Series: Roman x Virgil, Logan x Remus, Patton x Janus

Hell on Earth (hoe): In a small town isolated by mountains, demon possession is on the rise. Right when two kids find themselves in the town after the suspicious death of their parents. Convenient timing or total coincidence, the town has its eyes on Roman and Remus. Are they connected to the rise in demonic activity? Will they be safe? No one knows.

Heaven on Earth (hoe2): (SEQUEL TO "Hell on Earth) Having escaped from a recluse town known as Hell's Portal and a murderous priest, their friend died as they made it to the safety of a town known to be Heaven's Gate. But danger is still out there. Secrets have still yet to be uncovered. A friend back from the dead. But is everything as it seems?*

RaF Series:

Ships in Series: Roman x Virgil, Remus x Janus, Logan x Patton

Rise and Fall (raf): After getting hired to capture a wandering merchant suspected to be a monster, Roman sets out to find him. Taking on his first task as a monster hunter, he must travel far and fast to catch up with the merchant. With his best friend at his side, who will he meet on his journey and what secrets will he discover?

Risen to Fall (raf2/rtf): (Sequel to Rise and Fall) Having found a promised land, the twins raise their families in safety until danger knocks at their door. Secrets of the past and cults alike will force them into action to save themselves and future generations.*

FoF Series:

Ships in Series: Roman x Virgil, Logan x Remus, Patton x Janus

Fact or Fiction (fof): An isolated mountain town surrounded by deep forests has some interesting rumors and tourist attractions. Tales of an inhuman creature terrorizing those who come across it, if they leave alive. Logan decides to move in and discover the truth.

Everyone Fucking Dies (efd): (SEQUEL TO FACT OR FICTION) In a new dimension, scattered and hunted, who survives? Who dies? Will they ever return home? Or will they have to live in a world if eldritch monsters?

Strange Happenings (shtl): Janus and Virgil move back to their hometown. While Virgil is at college, Janus has an investigation to conduct under the strict orders of his mother. He knows what will happen if he refuses her. What will he discover? What secrets will unravel? (an alternate timeline for Fact or Fiction and Everyone Fucking Dies)

SOS Series:

Ships in Series: Roman x Virgil, Logan x Remus, Patton x Janus

School of Secrets (sos): A secret boarding school in the center of the Bermuda Triangle has accepted a new batch of students. Each one harbouring a secret or two that could get them killed outside of the school. Although not every child taken to the island attends the school, the island is protected by school staff from impending doom. Hunters and war alike threaten the children, will they be able to see a future free of harm, to be themselves?

Unintended Consequence: Things have changed. One decision with unintended consequences made Remus immortal, with only Virgil at his side, they watched their friends die. After countless years, with their mental health deteriorating, they see a familiar face. What happens when two immortals meet their friends' reincarnations?

GaG Series:

Ships in Series: Roman x Virgil, Logan x Remus, Patton x Janus

Gifts and Gifted (gag): After the tragic death of their parents, brothers Roman and Remus moved to a new state, new city, to get a fresh start. They try to assimilate in this odd historic town, getting new jobs and friends, but they also find some people they can't stand or are simply suspicious. But circumstances force them together and many secrets come to light.

Fae and Man (FAM): Sequel to Gifts and Gifted, Fae and human relations are difficult. Patton has taken over his grandma's business of finding and helping the fae home, Remus helping in hiding them after taking over the mortuary from Logan's uncle. If that wasn't difficult enough, Remus is going through strange changes and Virgil is struggling to adjust to being human. Will they suffer in silence or ask for help? What conflicts will arise?

New Normal (NN): (Takes place after Fae and Man, third book in the GaG series) After secrets have been unveiled and the world forever changed by the merging of realms, how will everyone fare under this new normal? Will the Fae still be hunted? Will humans be subjected to abuse? Will selkies still be at risk of being trapped? How will so many different species interact with each other? Will there be peace or war?

SOAB! Au:

Ships in Series: Logan x Patton x Janus

Son of a Bitch (soab): Patton and his son have moved into a new town. The once hopeful move turned sour when two chance encounters throws everything off course. A fight and a mix up leading to three single dads making an unfortunate acquaintance. (Where everything started)

SOAB! Rocky Start: Virgil is sent to a new foster parent. Logan does his best, but it's a rocky start. (Takes place before Son of a Bitch)

SOAB! Yuletide Fun: The kids are on winter break and Logan and Janus are feeling the holiday blues. They miss their families despite everything, luckily, Patton has an idea and a good relationship with his own family. So he decides to introduce his parents to his partners and their kiddos. What holiday mischief will happen? What stories will Patton's parents' tell about their now grown little boy? (Takes place after Son of a Bitch)

SOAB! Take a Bite out of Life: (Takes place before the events of Son of a Bitch) Janus has been running his restaurant for nearly two years in the town he grew up in. Stressed, depressed, and having recently cut off his family, he has thrown himself into his work. He doesn't know what to do with his life or himself, but when he gets his first catering order for the local orphanage, everything changes for the better. He never planned to be a father, but maybe it's time for him to take a bite out of life?

SOAB! Surprise Attack: (Takes place after Son of a Bitch) Virgil is still getting used to his new family and being part of a family that genuinely loves him. But it is nearing November 8th, his birthday. A day he is certain will be forgotten. With how his family is acting and the hushed whispers that cut off right when he enters the room, he fears the worse. No one mentions the whispers or his birthday, he's afraid and trying not to show it as his anxiety eats at him. As he questions if they still want him to be part of their family. What will ensue?

SOAB! Police Station, Fire Station, and Apartment: (Takes place before the events of Son of a Bitch) How did the twins end up in separate orphanages? Why was Virgil placed in foster care? Who were their family before they were adopted? Let's take a peek into the past.

SOAB! Gender? Fuck!: (Takes place after Son of a Bitch) Gender can be confusing and hard to navigate. Virgil and Roman are struggling, Remus forgot something important, and they navigate it together. Some changes, confusion, and stress won't stop them from supporting each other.

SOAB! Cupcakes and Dragons: (takes place before Son of a Bitch) How did Roman come into Patton’s care? Patton Cross wasn’t always a baker. One night of work changed his life. He’d always say it was for the better. And it was. He discovered a passion and discovered his little Star.

SOAB! A New Kind of Spectrum: (takes place after Son of a Bitch) Self discovery is a continuous journey. Sometimes you need some help in your journey. It's the summer before Virgil, Roman, and Remus enter high school. Virgil is made aware of something during a sleepover with two of his friends that leads the family to some interesting discoveries.

Stand Alone Stories:

Win or Lose (wol): Ships: Roman x Virgil, Logan x Remus, Patton x Janus Life was a series of battles, win or lose, they would have to fight again. Sometimes, they could rest before they fought once more, sometimes they could not. One day, they face a new discovery, a new challenge. Will they win or lose?

Out of this World (ootw): Ships: Roman x Virgil, Logan x Remus, Patton x Janus In a small desert town, a UFO has landed. While the local government explores the crash, an extraterrestrial being is on the run with time sensitive information trying to leave and stop an intergalactic war. An unlikely group of friends might be the key to saving thousands of lives. Secrets will be revealed, some new, some old. Lies will come undone. Will this group of unlikely friends survive it all?*

Knife to Meet You (ktmy): Ships: Roman x Virgil, one sided Virgil x Patton, one sided Patton x Logan, Remus x Janus x Logan Four years ago, a steady but concerning statistic rose. Murders. New information comes to light, revealing that these seemingly unconnected murders are actually the product of an infamous serial killer. Tensions are high, stress is high, and there's something in the air. What will happen? Who is this mysterious killer? And who is next?*

Ghost of You: Ships: Logan x Virgil, Remus x Patton, Roman x Janus Karma comes in many different forms, sometimes it is even passed down. When an old house is passed down, more than just a new home is inherited. Surely an old house only needs some repairs? But its new occupants will wish they'd hired an exorcist. Will the ghosts and mortals learn to coexist or will they destroy each other?*

Running Out of Time (root): Ships: Remus x Logan, Janus x Patton, Roman x Virgil Time is unraveling. A time traveler is trying to save the known universe, but at what cost? Will the world be saved? Is the world even worth saving? Six people will have to make that decision.

Body in the Water (bitw): Ships: Remus x Logan, Patton x Janus, Virgil x Roman Summer school is supposed to be easy. But with strange deadly accidents and rumors of ghosts filling the air, maybe hope for a decent college is a farther reach than Roman bargained for?

Son of a Witch (soaw): Ships Janus x Patton x Logan On the run from the king's guards, Janus finds refuge in a dangerous neck of the enchanted woods. But he isn't alone. What else lurks in the woods? Will he get out alive? Is he in for more than he bargained for?

Forgotten Gods (fg): Ships: Remus x Janus, Patton x Logan, Roman x Virgil The gods of old are no longer needed, no longer known. Did they simply fade away or do they still lurk around the corner? What happens when a god is forgotten? What happens when a new god appears?

Stolen? Borrowed? Same Thing. (sbst): Ships: Janus x Remus, Patton x Logan, Roman x Virgil Borrowers, Pixies, and Brownies have always lived under human's noses. Each one thinking the other is a myth. Each one views humans as an enemy, a tool, or a friend. What happens when they all meet? Will the four species get along?

Coffee and Zombies (CaZ): Ships: Janus x Patton Life and Death, two very contrast things. Or are they? In the zombie apocalypse, what is death? What is life? Is anyone truly living? A scientist searching for a cure to his mistake, a firefighter bent on helping survivors, two supernatural brothers struggling to adapt and survive, and two brothers who desperately want to rest and find safety. Will they survive?

Currently Writing:

New Normal (NN): Ships: Patton x Janus, Remus x Logan, Roman x Virgil (Takes place after Fae and Man, third book in the GaG series) After secrets have been unveiled and the world forever changed by the merging of realms, how will everyone fare under this new normal? Will the Fae still be hunted? Will humans be subjected to abuse? Will selkies still be at risk of being trapped? How will so many different species interact with each other? Will there be peace or war?

Strange Happenings (SH!tl): Ships: Janus x Patton, Virgil x Roman, Logan x Remus Janus and Virgil move back to their hometown. While Virgil is at college, Janus has an investigation to conduct under the strict orders of his mother. He knows what will happen if he refuses her. What will he discover? What secrets will unravel? (an alternate timeline for Fact or Fiction and Everyone Fucking Dies)

Back Burner:

Stories in this section are on hold and may be rewritten

Easter Eggs and Epilogues (eeae): Having become deities and gaining access to the multiverse, our favorite boys now witness other universes and guide them to the afterlife as they discover what it means to no longer be human and navigate through issues they had ignored as new issues erupt around them. Fans of my stories might find this infrequent epilogue mini series a nice read. Especially if they have read my sanders sides au Of Monsters and Men, its sequel Neither Deity nor Man, and the triquel Neither Gone nor Forgotten, as these characters might have little easter egg appearances in some of my other works. This does contain spoilers to my other works, so proceed with caution. Due to the nature of this mini series it will have extremely infrequent updates due to it being full of epilogues of specific stories.*^

Coming Soon:

SOAB! One shots

Dragons, Krakens, Unicorns, Oh My! (DKUOM!TL): Ships: Roman x Virgil, Logan x Remus, Patton x Janus (alternate version of Fact or Fiction and Everyone Fucking Dies) Six children are separated from their parents and once peaceful lives only to discover they aren't as normal as they thought, that they're part of not one dimension, but two.

Meet Again (MA): Ships: Roman x Virgil, Patton x Janus, Remus x Logan (Takes place after School of Secrets and Unintended Consequences) Centuries of waiting and careful planning have bared their fruit. Years of glimpsing a mysterious figure. A strange invitation leads four strangers to the palace. The King has waited long enough.

Put the Rom in RomCom (PtRiRC): Ships: Roman x Logan, Remus x Virgil, Patton x Janus Sometimes, you stumble into something unplanned for, unexpected. It can be life changing in the most unexpected ways. Changing who you are, what you are, or even just your plans. Three different people stumble into these changes unexpectedly and love is in the air.

More Than Blood (MTB): Ships: Patton x Logan x Janus Son of a Bitch sequel, They say family is more than blood. What happens when the twins and Virgil's biological parents come back into the picture? Struggling with high school was hard enough, now it's getting more and more complicated as the days go by.

Accruing a Crew (AaC): Ships: Logan x Remus, Virgil x Roman, Patton x Janus Remus went out on his ship, The Morning Star, and never returned. Roman searches the seven seas for his brother when he sees The Morning Star once more, but his brother’s vessel is led by a filthy pirate. He must arrest this man, as is his duty, and hopefully he can discover the whereabouts of his dear brother, even if just to know if his dear brother was met with a watery grave.

Saving Time (ST): Ships: Roman x Virgil, Logan x Remus, Patton x Janus rewrite of Running out of Time, info coming

Resident Sides (RS): (name may change) Resident Evil au, info coming

Space Unfilled (SU): Ships: none, found family and QPR Logan studied hard, worked harder, and now he is finally achieving his dream. He is going to touch the stars with his fellow astronauts. But his dream will quickly turn to a nightmare he fears he will never escape as regret writhes deep within him.

First Murder and the Grief that Follows (FMatGtF): Blood of a brother on his hands, he is cast out from his home and the afterlife. Cursed to walk the world alone, immortal and unchanging. One day, he sees a familiar face. His brother. What will he do?

My Ao3:

* = Has a chapter reference in Easter Eggs and Epilogues to read after the story

^= On the back burner

[singmyaubade]

Good Luck Babe

poly!marauders x nerd!female!reader

summary: after being a wallflower throughout your first five years at hogwarts, you always thought that you could be invisible. but when you hear the marauders talking cruelly about you and proceeding to ask for your forgiveness after, well good luck babe.

warnings: eventual smut! 18+ heavy angst, cursing, reader wants to kill the marauders , swearing, unprotected sex, praise, oral (male receiving), jealousy

a/n: oh hey... this is kinda based on those cliche 2000's movies where the girl is ugly but not really and she has that glow up or whatever. this was written so quick and not proofread, don't kill me. i hope you enjoy and as always, i apologize if you hate this!

STARTING off your sixth year at Hogwarts being an entirely new person wasn't something that you had planned or expected.

On the inside, you felt exactly the same, the same girl who was bold and could ferociously win a fight when it came to her character.

The same girl who was witty and sarcastic, surprising half of the people around you when you made a joke once in a lifetime.

But on the outside, you didn't have an awkward mis-shaped bob and you no longer wore baggy jackets that didn't do a thing for your figure.

And you didn't hide your face anymore, trying your best to be invisible.

It wasn't that you were shy or that you felt like a loser but you thought social hierarchy was bullshit and the only thing you wanted to focus on was your studies.

You may have been a brave Gryffindor on the inside but on the outside, you had to play the part of a shy mouse as corny as that sounds.

Unfortunately for you, invisibility only tends to last for so long until one moment, you are a nobody and then all eyes are upon you.

And maybe, just maybe, if you hadn't heard the Marauders discussing you the previous year, you would have stayed the same.

You had passed by the boys dormitory to give Remus his textbooks back as you always did when you let you borrow when you heard them speaking of the very person behind the door,

"I still have yet to understand why Lily and the rest of them act like she's some charity case," James huffed, "I mean, she's not some sick patient, they only feel the need to pity her because of how she looks."

You always knew that James had a foul mouth but to be speaking about someone like this, it was cruel.

Remus hissed, "That's not nice Prongs,"

"I'm not even saying it to be a dick!" James groaned, "I just mean, I pity her more for the fact that they don't even invite her to anything outside of breakfast and dinner," He explained, causing Remus to go silent.

Sirius chuckled, shaking his head. "That's absolutely horrid."

James reclined on his bed, a smirk playing on his lips. "I’m just saying, if I were Y/N, I’d be mortified."

Your eyes widened as they began to water, they were speaking about you.

Remus leaned against the wall, a thoughtful expression crossing his face. "Maybe she just doesn’t want to hang out with Lily and the others."

"Moony, seriously," James shot back, sitting up. "Where is Y/N right now, and where are the other girls?" His eyebrow cocked, trying to make his point as Remus silenced.

Sirius raised an eyebrow, a glint of mischief in his eyes. "Why don’t we investigate for ourselves?" He unfolded the Marauder's Map with a flourish. "Alright, we’ve got Lily, Dorcas, Mary, and Marlene all at Hogsmeade, but Y/N is..." His voice trailed off, eyes narrowing.

James leaned closer, annoyance creeping into his tone as he grabbed the map, "She's-" He stopped, the color fading from his face.

"Fucking spit it out!" Remus said next as he snatched the map finally and saw that the map had shown that you were right outside their door.

"Shit!" You heard Remus say as he started making his way to the door.

Hearing his footsteps approaching, you quickly moved away from the door, bolting for your room.

Once you made it back to your dorm, you had sinked the floor. You put your hand on your mouth, muffling yourself as you cried silently.

You honestly hated to even say it but you did consider Lily and the rest of them your friends. You had never really thought about how they didn't invite you to places.

And if you were being truthful, they had never asked you to have breakfast or dinner with them.

You had always just assumed that you could join but they never told you to leave or swooshed you off. Another part of you hated how stupid you were, trying to intrude on their private time.

You didn't want to let it get to you what a bunch of seventeen year old boys were saying but it did sting horribly.

But in a way, it also motivated you to be who you were on the inside. You already had the top marks in your entire year and your plan to work in the Ministry after Hogwarts had already been set.

And now your chance to be something at Hogwarts was right in front of you, an opportunity that you couldn't miss.

You had to do it for yourself.

The Marauders had no idea who you truly were or even cared to know. And although Remus was kind to you, you could always see that he never made any effort to be your friend.

Not that you expected him to but it only taught you that they truly thought you were some hopeless case.

And an assignment to make the Marauders bite their tongues was one that you couldn't bare to fail.

After hearing that, you decided to avoid the Marauders for the next month, especially with summer break approaching. To your surprise, you barely saw them outside of classes, never giving them a chance to reach out—even Remus.

And then that summer, everything changed. You let your hair grow past your shoulders, embracing your natural curls instead of straightening them. You started wearing clothes that were trendy and form-fitting, a huge contrast to your old style.

You discovered a newfound love for self-care, enjoying the process far more than you expected. Each day felt like a transformation, and by the end of summer, your mother couldn’t help but notice. “Finally listening to me about your style, huh?” she teased.

You only laughed as you embraced her,

If only she knew what had caused it in the first place.

As you said goodbye to your family, anticipation mingled with dread. You knew the train ride would be the least of your worries, but the welcome dinner and the ceremony ahead felt like they might just be hell reincarnate.

As you entered Hogwarts, you admired it as much as you did when you were a first year. The castle was something you considered a second home and everything about it was magical, there was no doubting that.

A crowd of students, including yourself, moved toward the Great Hall, and you settled into your usual seat at the Gryffindor table.

You spotted the Marauders and the usual group of girls approaching, and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes. They took their usual spots in front of you, with the girls on one side and the boys on the other. James sat beside you, and Lily was directly in front of him.

You never quite understood why they arranged themselves like that, but it hardly mattered in the moment.

They were busy in conversation before James had noticed someone next to him, his eyes widening. You couldn't quite read his face but it seemed like a mix of confusion and flustered.

You stared at him back but he still had yet to mutter a word. You cleared your throat, "Uh hello," You practically whispered.

He snapped back into reality, "Oh sorry, hi," He muttered back.

Silence took over you both as James couldn't find the words of what to say to you.

On one hand, he wanted to call you beautiful, to tell you that you were one of the prettiest girls he’d ever seen. On the other, he just wanted to stare at you for a few more minutes like a creep.

Lily noticed his gaze and leaned in, smirking. "Excuse my friend; we’re still trying to figure out if he has a brain."

"I thought we solved that decades ago," Marlene chimed in, stifling a laugh.

Lily turned to you with a curious smile. "I don’t believe I’ve seen you before. What’s your name?"

Are you actually fucking kidding me?

You scoffed, "I'm Y/N,"

The entire group looked at you in awe, even the ones who weren't chimed in on the conversation.

"Y/N L/N?" Sirius asked, mouth gaping.

"Yep, that one," You snorted.

They all looked like they had seen a ghost, "You look different," Marlene said as Mary shoved her.

"She means in a good way!" Mary added.

"Uh thanks," You said, awkwardly.

They all continued to stare at you like you were an exhibit in a museum, their eyes scanning you up and down.

"Do you all mind not staring at me?" you asked, trying to break the tension. They all looked away, feigning innocence as they muttered apologies.

"How have you been?" Lily asked, clearly trying to ease the awkwardness.

"Fine," you replied, your tone clipped.

You caught the pained expressions on the Marauders' faces, realizing they were the reason for your dismissive attitude.

"That's great," Lily said, forcing a smile.

You felt a wave of frustration at the awkwardness surrouding you and decided it was time to escape. "I'm gonna go to the bathroom," you announced, heading toward the exit before they could respond.

As you walked away, you could already here the mutters and whispers emerging from the table, the fascinating topic being you.

You paced as you heard footsteps trailing behind you, but you ignored them, letting your gaze wander around the castle.

"Y/N!" someone called out, startling you.

You turned to see Sirius, James, and Remus hurrying after you. You only let out a snort before continuing your same way.

A hand suddenly reached around your forearm as you turned to see Remus. You quickly snatched your hand away, finally stopping to look at the group of boys who you despised.

Crossing your arms, you shot them a hostile look. "What?"

"We just wanna—"

"We're so—"

"Listen, we just—"

They all spoke at once, but you scoffed and turned back toward the bathroom, starting to walk away.

You were hoping that they would realize you wanted nothing to do with them but instead, it only made them want to chase you more.

They quickened their pace, and you spun around sharply. "For fuck's sake, what do you want?" you snapped.

James took a breath, his expression earnest. "I'm sorry for what I said. I've been thinking about it since you left. I was an awful twat, and you didn't deserve a thing of what I said."

You let out a sarcastic laugh, "Are you serious?" You asked as your expression changed to furious, "You basically called me a loser and said that Lily and the rest of them were only hanging out with me out of pity,"

James hissed as your statement, feeling the razor in your voice.

"-And now you all want to act as if I should just forgive you since I don't look the same anymore," You got closer to James's face, "Fuck off."

You turned your heel again and this time, the boys didn't follow you.

You finally entered the bathroom and shut the door behind you. Staring at your reflection in the mirror, you struggled to read the expression on your face. You were furious at the Marauders, and the idea of forgiving them felt impossible.

Yet, there was a flicker of gratitude that you felt for the change you’d undergone. You’d gained a new confidence that felt good, but the sting of their cruel words still lingered in your mind.

And you knew that you couldn't let it get to you but knowing they thought that of you, even Remus. It still did things to you that you would never admit out loud.

Snapping out of your thoughts, you realized it was almost time to head to the dormitory.

The rest of the night had flown by, with first years being introduced to their new home for the next six years while everyone else relaxed in the common room. Despite curfews, fifth years and above knew they could hang out longer—the curfew was mostly for the first years anyway.

"Caput Draconis," you muttered, and the Fat Lady nodded, granting you entrance.

Stepping into the common room, your heart sank as you spotted the last group you wanted to see. They noticed you just as quickly, encouraging you to pick up your pace toward the dorm.

"Hey, Y/N!" Dorcas called out, making you wince as you turned to see her waving.

The Marauders looked down, shame etched on their faces, avoiding your gaze as if you were Medusa.

You approached them slowly, dread settling in your stomach as they eyed you like a science project.

"We were just about to play a fun little game," Dorcas said enticingly, while Marlene snorted beside her.

"I don’t know if Spin the Bottle is a great idea for the first night back," Marlene added, taking a sip of her beer.

"A little peck never hurt anyone," Lily chimed in, clapping her hands together.

Of all people, you’d never expect Lily Evans to approve such a thing. This was the same girl who nearly fainted when she heard about Marlene and Dorcas kissing the previous year.

"I don’t know if this is the game for me," you replied, eyeing the group warily.

"Of course it is!" Lily insisted, but you raised an eyebrow. "Oh my gosh! Not like that, I just mean it's a fun game for us all to play," she quickly added, looking flustered.

Part of you wanted to say no and retreat to your bed, but that was the old you, and you knew it wouldn’t help. This was a new year, and you were determined to embrace new experiences.

Besides, you’d never participated in any scandalous games for all of the years you've been at Hogwarts—it felt like a crime in itself.

So, after a moment’s hesitation, you said, "Okay, sure." The girls erupted in cheers, while the Marauders exchanged worried glances.

What if you had to kiss one of them? Would you refuse and create a scene? Would you want to strangle them for even suggesting it?

The possibilities raced through their mind, but there was no turning back as everyone began to form a circle.

As you sat in the circle, a shiver of nervousness enveloped you. You had never kissed anyone before and the whole thought made you nervous within itself.

Don't get it wrong, you've had chances but they never seemed right and you certainly weren't kissing Matthew Trunchbull underneath the bleachers of the Quidditch field.

So when you got offered a shot of firewhiskey to cool your nerves by Marlene, you took it happily as it burned down your throat.

You brushed off all the negative thoughts entering your mind,

What really is the worst thing that could happen?

[lqveharrington]

Gentleman | R.L.

summary: remus lupin is the perfect gentleman.

pairing: remus lupin x fem!reader

includes: fluff, you and sirius are practically siblings, rem defending his girlfriend, someone gets pushed off a boat

a/n: all my inspo literally comes from the music i listen to 😭

James had invited the entire group down to the lake for the summer because it was the last summer before the last year of Hogwarts. He thought it should be memorable, and everyone loved the idea. His parents allowed him to borrow the lake house and boat, but only if everyone's parents were okay with it. Of course, your parents trusted you with your friends. The only rule was to stay in separate rooms from your boyfriend. Oopsies.

As the Potters’ boat slowed to a calm stop, the summer wind continued to blow through the air, the clouds nonexistent in the blue sky. The sun shimmered across the lake water and the radio played the top hits of the month, the sound drowning from the talking of the boat’s riders.

When Sirius had enough of all the chitchat, he quickly shed himself of his top and jumped into the lake water, splashing Marlene who was trying to tan on the boats end. She cursed him out and threatened to pull the ladder away when he splashed her again.

Witnessing the entire interaction, you hid a laugh behind a smile and left the girls to sit beside Remus who was sitting underneath the shade of the boat. You tucked your legs underneath your lap and leaned your chin on his shoulder. On instinct, his calloused hand found the space underneath your calf and gently squeezed even when talking to James. You admired his face glowing in the sun for a beat, eyes following the scars that were left behind from bad nights before he finally turned and met your loving eyes.

“Hey.” You murmur and grin when you felt him press a soft kiss to your lips. “Sirius just went into the water." He hummed and kissed you again, making you hum and separate once more. "You don't want to join him?”

“And leave you here all by yourself? What type of man do you think I am?” He thumbed your leg and felt for the rushing blood, ensuring there was a pule and that you were in fact real. It was a habit he was quick to have learned because of a full moon incident a year ago.

You shrug and rest your cheek on his shoulder instead, watching the gulls fly by and circle the food James was grilling. As he tried fighting them off with tongs, Lily and Dorcas began to draw sunscreen images on Marlene's back, not bothering to cover up their giggles.

“You don’t want to join the girls?” Remus tilted his head and scanned your side profile, following the contour of your face. He memorized every single bump and crease, gingerly tucking a piece of loose hair behind your ear when you looked back over at him.

You raise a brow at his guilty smile and analyze his mannerism, rubbing the one bit of sunscreen into his cheek. "What?"

“You just wanna stay in the shade with me, don't you, dovey?" He brought his hand up and gently cupped your cheek, pulling you close enough so he could press a kiss to your temple.

“Of course, wherever you are, I follow.” You grin as a blush creeps up your neck, not realizing Sirius had gotten out of the water and rolled his eyes at how affectionate the both of you were being.

“You two are so gross." He covered his eyes before shaking his head like the dog he was — ridding himself of all the water he brought up with him.

You groaned when you got hit with the water, glaring at the long-haired boy. He stuck his tongue out at you which you retaliated with your middle finger. You swore that Sirius had a secret hatred for you since you began dating Remus over a year ago.

Sirius gasped at your gesture and put a hand on his chest, returning the finger. Remus rolled his eyes at the both of you and gave you a pointed look, making you cover it with your hand.

"Prongs, do something! The lady won't go down without a fight!" SIrius complained and popped a soda can out of the cooler, leaning against the railing of the boat.

“Mate, I don’t know what you want me to do.” James threw him a confused look and reached inside the cooler to hand Lily her own can. "Besides, I can't do much here."

“You could toss her over board." Sirius muttered loud enough for you to whip your head toward him and glare.

"You were being mean first!" You move to stand only to be pulled back down into your seat. From the corner of your eye, you saw Remus pursing his lips in thought, making you sigh. "Rem—"

“Sit.” He practically commanded, rolling his eyes once more when you crossed your arms and legs in annoyance. But when you noticed his quick wink, you realize what he was going to do.

You smiled slyly toward Sirius when he met your eyes again. The poor unsuspecting bloke. Sirius gave you an annoyed look and went to say something — probably insulting all women — when Remus pulled him aside.

Assuming Remus was going to hangout with him instead of you, Sirius stuck his tongue out before yelping in surprise as Remus pushed him off the boat. Your eyes widened with a smile, stretching your neck to see where Sirius was flailing. The three girls burst out into laughter at the predicament and quickly moved away from all the splashing water, grabbing a polaroid to take a picture before he could get out. James just shook his head in disbelief, clasping his arm around Sirius’ and helping him up.

Remus tossed a towel in Sirius' direction before sitting beside you again, kissing the side of your head like nothing happened. You gave him cheeky smile and laced your hand with his.

“What a gentleman.” You chide before letting out a noise of surprise at the feeling of his lips on yours, dropping your hand to lay flat on his chest.

“Some gentleman you are.” Sirius muttered as he dried himself off. When he realized Remus was staring back at him with an unimpressed look, he took a huge step back behind James and quickly apologized. “Kidding, I’m kidding.”

You send him another death glare before staring up at Remus with soft eyes as he thumbed your palm, a small smile taking over your face. "You know we're probably going to get pranked anytime soon, right?"

"As long as I spend quality time with you, I think I'll be fine. Besides, he won't try anything too bad." Remus tilted your head up with his index finger. "I'm a gentleman anyway."

©lqveharrington - all rights reserved. do not copy, translate or share my work on other media platforms

[daddiesdrarryy]

James: Hey Moony, can I borrow a sweater?

Remus: Sure…but why are you going to Pads’s closet?

James: Because that’s where all your sweaters are

[ddejavvu]

Your best friend James with no boundaries is such perfect James I can’t even 😩 I feel like after a while James rubs off on you and you don’t even think about it anymore. Like all of a sudden you’re bursting in on him in the shower to ask him a simple question, you’re taking your bra off immediately when you get to his room to get comfy, you’re touching him and being affectionate in ways that is definitely more than friends. And every time James is just doe eyed in love 😍 like you’re my bestie, darling 🥺 Meanwhile Sirius and Remus are watching like 😳 did that just happen? That’s not normal best friend behaviour

"Where's James?" You waste no time in pushing the door to the boys' dorms open, interrogating Sirius and Remus who've occupied themselves with what looks like a mountain of classwork.

"He's in the shower, you can- wait for him on his bed-!" Sirius watches as you beeline for the bathroom, standing to stop you when he realizes you're about to walk in on James.

"Y/N, don't-!" He tries, but you've nudged the door open, and you don't stop there. You make for the shower curtain and Sirius stands frozen in his spot, wondering if he's going to be fired as the group's official guard dog.

"Jamie?" You call, sticking your head between the shower curtain and the wall. James turns where he'd been unknowingly showcasing his broad, muscled back, soapy and lathered with suds.

"Oh-! Y/N, hi," He grins, working a sponge over his side, "What's up?"

'What's-' Sirius turns to Remus, mouthing an echo of your words in confusion. Remus has nothing to offer; in fact, he looks weary as he sits back in his seat and listens.

"Do you think I can borrow your scarf today? The girls 'n I were going to Hogsmeade but it's really cold, and I think I lost my scarf in the forest."

"Yeah, 's in my trunk, bird," James nods, conversation flowing easily despite James's lack of attire as he bends lower to scrub at his thighs, "Y'know where my trunk is, yeah?"

"Under your bed?" You confirm, and he nods again.

"Get the boys to help you drag it out, m'love,"

"Right. Thanks Jamie," You grin, leaning in to kiss the soaked skin of his cheek. He grins brightly, letting his own lips press to your much drier face.

You leave the bathroom once more to be met with Sirius and Remus's mildly disgruntled expressions, and they stare at you like they hadn't heard James's request for grunt muscle.

"Can you... help me with his trunk? He said I could borrow his scarf." You repeat, pointing timidly in the direction of his bed.

"Why don't you just take his boxers, too?" Sirius's nose wrinkles as he grimaces, "I bet they're jealous you see his dick more than they do."

[brokenmenswhore]

i need more of that dont look seriesss i need sirius and reader to go against remus’ rules or summmm please and thank you if u choose to do so

whatever the people want, i shall give them 🙇‍♀️

don’t look | remus & sirius

part 2

pairings: remus lupin x fem!reader, sirius black x fem!reader

warnings: smut (MDNI 18+), language

part 1

────── ☾ ──────

Sirius opened his mouth to say something as Remus approached, but Remus put a hand up to cut him off.

“Nope, don’t even, I’m still mad at you,” Remus stated, walking past Sirius.

“Oh come on!” Sirius called to him, “look, I said I was sorry.”

“I know, but I’m still mad,” he called back, “and jealous, I guess.”

Sirius shrugged, “well maybe you should stop eating out your hot girlfriend in a communal space, Moons, what did you expect?”

Remus stopped in his tracks. He turned around and approached Sirius, stopping only a few feet away from him.

“You know you aren’t supposed to look at her like that.”

“Jeez, Moony, you aren’t my dad.”

Sirius’s nonchalance bothered Remus. Remus was hot-headed, and it was nearly the full moon, which meant his emotions were heightened even more than usual.

It also meant he was hornier than usual.

He marched to your dorm, swinging the door open, despite the two other girls sat on the floor, textbooks sprawled across their laps as you all studied together. “I need you.”

Your eyes shot up at him, the other girls scanning his figure up and down. “Rem, I’m studying,” you told him, as if he couldn’t see you doing just that.

“Please, I just need to borrow you for a minute.” Remus tried not to sound desperate, but he most certainly did. He didn’t care if the girls knew he wanted to borrow you to fuck you senseless, he only cared that he remained level-headed until he was alone with you.

You gave a smile to the other girls, closing your textbook and placing it on the floor before standing up and following Remus to his dormitory. He anticipated that it would be empty, but instead he found Sirius, cross-legged on his bed, a book in his lap.

Remus contemplated his options. Ever since Sirius’s infraction, he had avoided being with you in front of him, worried Sirius would try something again. However, today, he was angry, and he wanted to piss off Sirius by asserting his authority and dominance over you.

He pushed you onto the mattress, immediately hiking up your skirt and pulling down your underwear.

“Remus!” you squealed, taken aback by his haste.

He shushed you, saying, “need you bad.”

“Remmy, it’s not even a full moon tonight, you can usually wait until later in the da-“

Remus cut you off by shoving two fingers into your hole, not caring about warming you up as you squirmed from his touch.

“Shit,” you whined as his mouth connected with your clit, his tongue lapping up any wetness.

You moaned, your hands gripping his hair as he continued to shove his fingers in and out of you, his unoccupied hand pushing (with difficulty) his trousers down until he was left in his underwear, his hand sneaking past the waistband to lightly stroke himself at the sight of you.

Sirius was already in a fight with Remus over watching you, and part of him didn’t want to make anything worse. Part of him also thought that since they were already in a fight, what did it matter? He would just have to be more careful.

You whimpered when Remus hit a particularly good spot, and Sirius looked toward you through hooded lids, ready to retreat his gaze if Remus checked in on him, but Remus was focused only on you.

He had almost forgotten Sirius was in the room, his desperation and need growing more intense with each moan and whine you let out.

He pulled away from you, pulling his boxers all the way down before crawling on top of you.

“I need to feel you, pretty girl, are you ready for me?” he cooed, stroking his cock faster and faster as he waited for you to respond.

“Please, Remmy,” you begged, and he nearly came in his hand at the sound.

He lined himself up at your entrance, slowly pushing in despite his need. He would never give up watching your face as he pushed into you, even if he was desperate. The way your face contorted, the small whimpers that left your lips, the way your hair looked sprawled out on the pillows, the way your skirt bunched up around your waist-

He bottomed out inside of you, immediately starting to thrust in and out of you.

“Shit, Rem,” you moaned at the feeling, “you can use me.” You knew what he needed when the full moon was near, but your statement still drove him crazy as if he had never heard it before.

Remus placed both of your wrists above your head, holding them with one hand as his head dipped in the crook of your neck, his unoccupied hand finding your clit and rubbing fast circles as he fucked you. He didn’t care about timing, he just needed you bad. He needed to come inside of you, but he needed you to come first, even if it all happened quickly. He adored the feeling of you coming on his cock, and needed to feel it to achieve his own high.

You turned your head so that Remus had more room to rest his on your shoulder, and you glanced at Sirius, who shifted his seated position as he heard you moan. You remembered the last time he was in the room, and you hoped he would look over at you again, your eyes focused on him as Remus pounded into you at a ruthless pace.

He finally did glance at you, but he did a double take, checking if you were really looking at him, and you were. You nodded your head up and down, a way to tell him it was okay with you if he watched, and that you wanted him to do as such.

His eyes remained on you, scanning your body up and down, watching your thighs fall more and more open as Remus’s hand moved faster and faster on your clit.

He loved seeing you with your hands above your head, a new sight for him, Remus having full control over your body.

Your back arched off the bed, causing the pressure on your wrists to increase as your climax threatened to hit, Remus’s hand and his cock almost too much to hold it together.

“Sir- shit, I’m gonna-“

You squeezed Remus’s cock like a vice, your high washing over you as your thighs shook.

“Shit, baby,” Remus breathed.

He didn’t catch your almost-slip, but Sirius certainly did, his eyes darkening as he watched you come down from your high, your body still shifting back and forth on the bed from the force of his best friend’s hips snapping against yours.

“Gonna come in you,” Remus moaned, a final few, sharp thrusts sending him over the edge as he came, groans in your ear that only you could hear as he spilled his seed inside of you.

You signaled for Sirius to look away as Remus let go of your wrists, pulling out of you before standing up and gazing at your fucked-out frame.

“Thank you, baby,” he placed a gentle kiss to your forehead, “let me get you cleaned up.”

He stretched a hand out to you, and you took it, allowing him to guide you to the bathroom.

✶

Sirius did not speak to you for an entire week after that.

You tried to spark conversation, but he always found an excuse to leave the room or divert his attention. Remus noticed, but assumed it was because of the first time he watched you, and he quite enjoyed the thought of Sirius leaving you alone.

You were seated in the common room, everyone apart from you and the boys at a party in the Ravenclaw dorms. The boys had decided to skip this particular party thanks to Remus, who was falling behind in Transfiguration, and who cursed the Ravenclaws for throwing a party the night before a massive Transfiguration exam.

“I can’t fucking focus,” Remus spoke, annoyed at his inability to comprehend the subject.

“I have some extra notes in the dorms,” James spoke, “I can try to find them, maybe they’ll help?”

“Yeah, alright,” Remus agreed, “worth a shot.”

Remus sighed, placing a kiss on your forehead as he and James retreated up the stairs to search for James’s extra notes.

You turned to Sirius, who avoided meeting your gaze.

“Please talk to me, Sirius.”

He ignored you completely.

“Siri, please.”

The pet name broke him out of his mindset. “Don’t call me Siri.”

“Why not, Siri?” you teased.

“Because it does things to me. Stop.”

“Why?”

“Seriously, Y/N-“

“Seriously what? Why won’t you talk to me?”

Sirius lowered his voice, whisper-yelling, “what do you mean why won’t I talk to you? I’m finally in a decent spot with Remus, what am I gonna do if he finds out I eye-fucked his girlfriend again while he was in the middle of railing her?”

“What does that have to do with you speaking to me?” you questioned.

“Because every single time I look at you, I see- I see you like that.”

You raised your eyebrows in surprise at Sirius’s confession. “Really?”

“Shut up.”

“You like what you saw?” you teased.

“Shut up.”

“You wanna see more?”

“Stop,” Sirius warned.

You listened intently up the staircase, and heard James yell, “I fucking swear they were here! Check in that one.”

You propped your legs up on the coffee table, allowing your legs to fall open and give Sirius an unobstructed line of sight to your core.

“Do you wanna see more?” you asked again, running a finger over your underwear, just above your folds.

“Don’t fucking tease me.”

You nodded your head no, you were indeed not teasing him. You really were going to touch yourself.

You moved your underwear aside, giving Sirius full view of your most sensitive area as you put one of your middle fingers into your mouth.

You made a show of sucking on the digit, wetting the skin before slowly inserting it into your now-wet hole. You let out a light whine, so as not to alert Remus of what you were up to.

Sirius tried to restrain himself, but he quite literally could not take his eyes away from you. He was obsessed; a man starved who finally found sustenance. He couldn’t look away if he tried.

You began to move your finger faster and faster, your other hand coming up to squeeze your breast over your shirt.

“Shit, Siri,” you moaned, and Sirius nearly lost it right there.

He stood up and approached you, gripping the wrist that was moving your finger inside of your hole.

You assumed he would stop you, but instead, he pulled your finger out, pressing two of his fingers to your lips and allowing you to suck on them.

When he was satisfied with how wet they were, he replaced your finger with his own, his pointer and middle entering you slowly as you threw your head back.

Sirius turned his head to the staircase, hearing “well why wouldn’t they be with literally every other set of notes?” and “fucking hell, can you check the trunk over there?”

Sirius met your eyes, watching you squirm as he fingered you, his thumb finding its way to your clit and rubbing circles, a small smile finding its way onto his lips as he watched your reaction to his touch.

As he pumped his fingers faster and faster, he began to curl them against your spongy walls, a euphoric feeling.

“Siri, fuck,” you whined.

Sirius’s unoccupied hand went to your mouth, covering it to keep you from being loud enough for Remus or James to hear.

“You’re so fucking pretty, did you know that?” Sirius spoke, hand still ruthless on your core, “staring at me with someone else’s cock in you, thinking it won’t affect me?”

You whined under Sirius’s hand, your hips beginning to grind on his hand as he continued speaking.

“Silly little girl, don’t you know Remus said we shouldn’t look at you? You keep breaking his rules, and that’s only something bad girls do. You’re not a bad girl, are you?”

Sirius only moved his hand from your mouth to hear you respond. “Maybe I am, Siri,” you moaned.

Sirius placed his hand back over your mouth, his fingers fucking you faster and faster after you spoke. “You wanna be a bad girl? I’ll treat you like a bad girl. Isn’t that what you want, huh? Staring at me when you have Remus inside of you?”

Your high was dangerously close, Sirius’s fingers better than you could have ever imagined, when Sirius heard “fuck this! I’m just gonna go back downstairs.”

Sirius immediately pulled away, placing your legs back in a normal seated position as he sat back down across from you, scanning the pages of his textbook as if nothing had just happened.

“Sorry that took so long, dumbass couldn’t even find the extra notes,” Remus said, plopping down next to you and throwing an arm around your shoulders, “did I miss anything good?”