#incorrect remus lupin quotes

[daddiesdrarryy]

James: Hey Moony, can I borrow a sweater?

Remus: Sure…but why are you going to Pads’s closet?

James: Because that’s where all your sweaters are

[manehead]

Sirius: Ugh, this date is boring

Remus: This isn’t a date, I told you I was going to the store.

Sirius: Then why did you invite me?

Remus: I didn’t. I specifically said “do not come with me” and you said “don’t tell me what to do” and just followed me here.

[accio-sriracha]

Sirius: Just because I'm rich doesn't mean I own a yacht, Prongs. Not all wealthy people are yachty.

Remus: *looking up from his book* What did you just say?

Sirius: James thinks that I have to own a yacht to be rich.

Remus: No... the other part. The last word.

Sirius: Yachty?

Remus: There's no way that's a real word.

Sirius: *confidently* Look it up then, I'll bet you galleons on it.

*three hours later*

Remus: *head in his hands* *in absolute shambles* I just can't believe it's an actual fucking word.

[allaboutlov3]

Remus is the kind of guy who tells others that it’s okay to take a break and rest every once in a while. That it’s fundamentally important to look after yourself. But whenever someone points out that this also applies to him, he just says: "I can sleep when I'm dead and I’ll rest when I'm done"

[give-bucky-his-boyfriend-back]

Sirius: You're an angel

Remus: I'm an atheist

Sirius: Ok baby

Remus: You don't have children and if you had , it sure as hell wouldn't be me

Sirius:

Remus: I'm sorry I'm panicking, how exactly do normal people respond to affection??

[illpunchyouintheface]

Remus: hey what are you doing?

Harry: eating a family size bag of chips.

Remus: no…that's the smallest size.

Harry: every size is family sized when you're practically an orphan.

Sirius: kid no-

[stufflistings]

Unexpected Adventure

Charlie: Ugh, I hate Mondays. Lily: We could use a bit of excitement today. Charlie: Yeah, like what? Lily: I don't know, something unexpected. Just then, the power goes out Charlie: Well, that was unexpected. Now what? Lily: Let's go on an adventure! Explore the mysteries of the dark! Charlie: You mean stumble around blindly in the dark? Lily: Exactly! It's an unexpected adventure. They grab flashlights and venture into the unknown corners of their apartment Charlie: This is ridiculous. Lily: No, this is thrilling! Like an urban safari. They accidentally knock over a stack of board games Charlie: Stealth mode failed. Lily: Who needs stealth? We're explorers! They discover a hidden room behind a bookshelf Charlie: Okay, now I'm intrigued. Lily: See? Unexpected adventures are the best! Inside the hidden room, they find an old treasure chest Charlie: Is this real life? Lily: It's like a movie, but better! They open the chest to find... a stash of snacks Charlie: Best. Adventure. Ever. Lily: Told you Mondays could be exciting.

[managone16]

Sirius: Guess fucking what? Peter: You killed your parents. Remus: You burned down the Great Hall. James: You shagged Remus. Sirius: I fucking apologized to Regulus. *Everyone Gasps*

[faerycross]

sirius taking a "is my boyfriend autistic" quiz on his pc at the kitchen table and james making tea behind him like "yeah i took that yesterday. your brother is autistic by the way"

[yourgalgremlin]

REMUS: I spent most of 5th year in & out—

SIRIUS: of the hospital wing?

JAMES: of detention?

REGULUS: of Sirius?

REMUS: …of depression.

[daddiesdrarryy]

Remus: Okay, wait, I’m really confused

Sirius: What’s there to be confused about? We’ve been dating for three months, right?

Remus: We are?

Sirius: I introduced you to Prong’s parents! Which is practically like introducing you to my parents, Moony

Remus: As best friends! Nothing romantic ever happened between us, right?

Sirius: Have you forgotten about our Friday dinner dates?

Remus: You mean “frinner”? Friends-dinner?

Sirius: We always split dessert!

Remus: Because we’re broke!

Sirius: We just got matching couple rings for your birthday!

Remus: Because we’re best friends!

Sirius: You kissed my forehead every night!

Remus: Prongs does the same with your brother!

Remus: Oh…

[manehead]

Poetry

Sirius: Remus wrote me a poem

James: Oh, what a nice—

Sirius: Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day

Sirius: No, a summer’s day is not a bitch

Regulus: Funny, I wrote something similar to James

[accio-sriracha]

Sirius: *frustrated trying to use muggle tech* I don't understand any of this! I literally have cyberphobia I don't want to do this anymore.

Remus: *sighing* You don't have cyberphobia, Padfoot, you're just a wizard. Give it time.

Sirius: *continues to struggle typing his own name*

Remus:

Remus: I take it back. You're an idiot.

[allaboutlov3]

The marauders as conversations I’ve had:

James: <random sounds>

Sirius and Regulus: *blinking in confusion* What did you say?

Remus: He said very good. But in French.

Sirius: I don’t know what the hell THAT was. But it certainly wasn’t French. You sounded like you were about to die.

Regulus: Yeah please never do that again.

[give-bucky-his-boyfriend-back]

Sirius: Starsss shining bright above you

Sirius:Night breezes seem to whisper 'I love you.'

Sirius: Birds singing in the Sycamore trees

Sirius: Please share a piece of chocolate with meee

Remus:

Remus: no

[illpunchyouintheface]

Peter: I am currently experiencing life at 15 wtf's per hour.

James: I am not responsible for what my face does when you talk.

Remus: I may look calm but in my head you've already died three times.

Sirius: Keep rolling your eyes and may be fortunate enough to find what's left of your brain.