#Biploar

[donotdestroy]

Thinking is difficult, that’s why most people judge. 

—Carl Gustav Jung 

[growrowan]

Relationships with mentally ill people suck.

Signed, someone who is also mentally ill but capable of taking responsibility for her brain barfs.

[cupcakehamster64]

What do you mean it isn't a Sun (DCA) and Moon (DCA) themed bunny.

This is the Bipolar II bunny from Plushie Dreadfuls! As soon as I saw it, I thought of Sun and Moon (and it is a sun and moon theme, just not OUR Sun and Moon DCA's) and the fact it represents Bipolar II just pulled me in further seeing as it's the type I personally have. This little lad shipped from China and was purchased by my sister (THANK YOU if you see this!)

Necklaces also from my sister. Purchased from Hot Topic for about $12 ~ $13 USD.

And here are some size comparisons in case you want to see how big it is (I assume the plush itself, minus the ears, is roughly 10 inches, give or take) and if it's worth the price tag ($45.00 USD and comes with a tote bag.)

1. A medium squishmallow.

2. A Nintendo Switch without joycons.

3. No country for old men paper back edition.

4. Pill bottle :)

[anglercrit]

Alright. Pentleton has been (Unintended pun) finished the last image I sent was a Upscaled one I did myself before the leak ended up adding a better quality one. So here he is.

Bonus is a Bio Sheet (I added a bit of my Mental Illness to him.) I removed the Jack The Ripper connotations and went with a fictional killer with no ties to the real world.

Flags:

Transgender + Trans Masc

The Flag of Great Britain

AuDHD Flag

BiCurious + Pomosexual + Cupiosexual (All those kinda conflict but he's confused. Give the mans a break.)

For the screen readers who can't read:

Pentleton, Edward “Ed/Eddie” (born as Pentleton, Elizabeth “Eli”) | Sir Pentious / Saint Repentious

Eddie was born on March 4th 1807, London, England. To a high class family, growing up Pentleton always had a love for designing things such as varous inventions. Growing up Ed had always felt uncomfortable with his identity as he always felt comfortable as a male rather than a female, but never spoke out due to not knowing what his feelings were, he identified as Pentleton and not by his new perferred name in order to not attract any attention to himself. Pentleton suffered from an undiagnosed disability (It was later revealed it was a variant of Anxeity, Autism, ADHD and Biploar Scizoeffective.) spending most of his time in the safety of his family home he inherited he was a recluse preferring to actually make things that better suited his desires then basic human interaction. Pentleton was always unlucky. Despite being well off growing up, bad luck seemed to follow him everywhere, and as he grew into adulthood and the desire for basic human interaction dwindled. Pentleton always found comfort in doing hos own thing, and going to the library. One particular afternoon, (Circa. 1828, April 12th) Pentleton was apprehended on suspicion of murdering two young women in downtown London, despite the fact he was obviously not the killer and he was simply at the wrong place, at the wrong time. The police arrested him anyways, and with severe questioning, Pentleton folded, confessing to a crime he never committed out of duress. Because he “confessed” the police took that as guilt and sentenced him to public excution by hanging. While he was being held, Pentleton’s home was immediately searched and they found a prototype of a children’s toy called “Egg Boiz” the basis was they were essetionally a toy manufactured for the poor children of London to play with, for free. Most of Eddie’s blueprints were seized and are now being displayed in the “British Museum” to this day. Before Pentleton’s excution, there was rumors surfing around of his innocence as more murders were found when Pentleton was being held in the Stocks before he was sent to the hanging tree. No one really thought the killer was innocent mainly because of his “confession”. On exactly April, 22, 1828. 20 days after Pentleton’s conviction, Pentleton was executed in front of a bunch of high classes. His last words were allegedly: “I have a lot to say, but one of them is that humanity is willing to vindicate someone they viewed as dangerous, when the dangerous person is them all along. Part of being human is realizing everyone makes mistakes, well. You all made a huge one, by killing one snake, you freed another. And that’s a price that those poor girls will never understand. But hey, life goes on, I hope and pray that in the final events of my death that none of you make the same mistakes killing an innocent man.” After the hanging, Pentleton’s body was immediately burnt and the house he lived in is now a museum tour of some sorts, long after Pentleton’s death the killer struck again killing men and women over the course of the years. And ended up being found in the end. When Pentleton arrived to Heaven, Saint Peter didn’t gain him entry on the grounds of “Admitting to a murder” Pentleton’s unfair judgement made him damned for eternity not truly belonging in Hell.

Yup, I cooked and Im gonna go to bed. If people see this on my acc that means I posted it there too.

DAMN you did in fact cook- I just wanna say Saint Repentious is such a clever name i love it

[pleasantspark]

Sir Pentious' Redid Backstory

More consistency yay!

Been thinking about The Green Mile and wondered about a TRUE good reason WHY Heaven won't let Sir Pentious in despite the fact he was an innocent Man, I mean. They were like:

"You confessed to the crime, so to HELL you go!"

So, anyways here he is!

Flags:

TransMasc (FtM) + Transgender

England

AuDHD

BiCurious + Pomosexual + Cupiosexual

Notes:

Sir Pentious having AuDHD, Anxiety and Bipolar-Schizoeffective is due on part because I am diagnosed with those issues at hand, the only diagnosed illness of mine I didn't pass onto him was DID and I don't feel exactly comfortable depicting a illness like that in a show about Hell.

Pentleton was wealthy growing up, but even if your wealthy it doesn't mean shit, Pentleton's undiagnosed mental health (Because in 1800s it was seen as weak) so most of the time, he focused on himself.

Pentleton had a fair amount of Suitors, but marriage was never for him, (again, social issues).

All shit was researched properly and my basic understanding.

The Killer was not Jack the Ripper, I separate reality from HH, if there isn't any politics. And most of the killers in Hazbin are fictional. Then there shouldn't be a correlation to Real Life and Hazbin/Helluva. I came to escape the real world. Not be reminded of how shitty it is.

ID:

Pentleton, Edward “Ed/Eddie” (born as Pentleton, Elizabeth “Eli”) | Sir Pentious / Saint Repentious Eddie was born on March 4th 1807, London, England. To a high class family, growing up Pentleton always had a love for designing things such as varous inventions. Growing up Ed had always felt uncomfortable with his identity as he always felt comfortable as a male rather than a female, but never spoke out due to not knowing what his feelings were, he identified as Pentleton and not by his new perferred name in order to not attract any attention to himself. Pentleton suffered from an undiagnosed disability (It was later revealed it was a variant of Anxeity, Autism, ADHD and Biploar Scizoeffective.) spending most of his time in the safety of his family home he inherited he was a recluse preferring to actually make things that better suited his desires then basic human interaction. Pentleton was always unlucky. Despite being well off growing up, bad luck seemed to follow him everywhere, and as he grew into adulthood and the desire for basic human interaction dwindled. Pentleton always found comfort in doing hos own thing, and going to the library. One particular afternoon, (Circa. 1828, April 12th) Pentleton was apprehended on suspicion of murdering two young women in downtown London, despite the fact he was obviously not the killer and he was simply at the wrong place, at the wrong time. The police arrested him anyways, and with severe questioning, Pentleton folded, confessing to a crime he never committed out of duress. Because he “confessed” the police took that as guilt and sentenced him to public excution by hanging. While he was being held, Pentleton’s home was immediately searched and they found a prototype of a children’s toy called “Egg Boiz” the basis was they were essetionally a toy manufactured for the poor children of London to play with, for free. Most of Eddie’s blueprints were seized and are now being displayed in the “British Museum” to this day. Before Pentleton’s excution, there was rumors surfing around of his innocence as more murders were found when Pentleton was being held in the Stocks before he was sent to the hanging tree. No one really thought the killer was innocent mainly because of his “confession”. On exactly April, 22, 1828. 20 days after Pentleton’s conviction, Pentleton was executed in front of a bunch of high classes. His last words were allegedly: “I have a lot to say, but one of them is that humanity is willing to vindicate someone they viewed as dangerous, when the dangerous person is them all along. Part of being human is realizing everyone makes mistakes, well. You all made a huge one, by killing one snake, you freed another. And that’s a price that those poor girls will never understand. But hey, life goes on, I hope and pray that in the final events of my death that none of you make the same mistakes killing an innocent man.” After the hanging, Pentleton’s body was immediately burnt and the house he lived in is now a museum tour of some sorts, long after Pentleton’s death the killer struck again killing men and women over the course of the years. And ended up being found in the end. When Pentleton arrived to Heaven, Saint Peter didn’t gain him entry on the grounds of “Admitting to a murder” Pentleton’s unfair judgement made him damned for eternity not truly belonging in Hell.

END ID

[ask-party-pie]

I'm Bipolar Type 2. Pinkie is a type 1 but high functioning... most of the time. She is prone to involuntary muscle movements, wild manic episodes, babbling incoherently and deep bouts of depression.

I get the mood swings and constantly buy things I don't need or want. Just gives me a chance to practice Generosity and donate to charity auctions if it's like, a big expensive thing.

You seem to have a good handle on it if you have the same Biploar type as Pinkie, Darling.

You're so calm and composed, Dear cousin. <3

Miss Pie: Why thank you! It's taken quite a bit to get to where I am today, let me tell you.

Miss Pie: You should have seen me when I first got to Manehattan, though...it was rough for a bit there.

[obliviouslybrii]

Being biploar mixing with the current state of American government is going to drive me to drink—

—or go stabby stab…I havent determined which yet

[kgraffie]

How am I Supposed to Look.

LONG POST.

Mental illness is so hard to understand most times. When I first got diagnosed Bipolar I got the phrase from many people- "You don't look Bipolar". Ummm okay how am I supposed to look? Am I suppose to look like that character in that movie that was off the walls and deranged looking? Like come on...do a little research or ask me questions before assuming things. 

I've suffered very big ups and downs over the years after my Bipolar diagnose. I was originally diagnosed as Biploar II. Which is more of the depressive side of it (or how I feel it is). As years went/go on I have had increased manic episodes. So quite a few years ago now I was offically diagnosed as Bipolar, Mixed. Biploar, Mixed is a lot newer and just recently within the last few years was added to the diagnose codes in the hospital system(s). Not sure if all of them have it, but the one I go to finally had it added. I actually came across Bipolar, Mixed while doing some research on Bipolar in general. Mixed fits better with the traits I've had and am having with my Bipolar. 

As I said previously on this blog...I have other mental diagnoses other than Bipolar. 

Bipolar, Mixed

Anxiety Disorder

Depression Disorder

Trauma and Stressor Disorder

ADHD

PTSD (so they claim)

OCD tendencies 

Those are the ones I've been diagnosed with at least. When you see it in a list like this (or at least when I see it in a list like this) it feels/looks like A LOT of stuff going on. Which it is a lot, but my mind says 'hey, it's not as bad as others', and as true as that could be...that doesn't matter. Everyone has their shit they deal with. Some deal some don't. Some get help others don't. We are all different. We all have our burdens or things to deal with. 

For me though I for a long time didn't deal with it. I didn't acknowledge any of it even. We were that family that didn't express things...let alone acknowledge something was wrong. Stuff it deep down. Which I guess worked for awhile (not in a good way though). By the time I hit the age of 13 or 14 (middle school) I was pretty well off as a anxious and depressive mess. Yes there were changes going on of course. I was a tween when it started and a teenager when it REALLY started. I remember my first BIG BIG anxiety attack. It was the first day of High School for me. First time since moving to Idaho that I had to take the bus to school. I was so nervous to the point I was pretty much sick. I couldn't breath, my heart was pounding so fast. I was so nervous I'd be late, or the bus would be late, or something. My mom though brushed it off as just it being the first day. It continued on worse and worse after the start of High School. Once I got a car it somewhat subsided, but I still had anxiety badly. Depression was in waves also. I had a lot of different daily things that I HAD to do. I had to have a routine or my whole day was off. I'm sure my mom noticed, but we really didn't talk about it or address it. 

As the years went on it all increased more and more. Once I graduated from High School I moved to Portland, OR for college...it didn't last long. If I'm honest it didn't do any good for me. I got into a group of friends that were okay, but not good for me. I went into a relationship fast with a guy and it was VERY toxic. I NEVER slept. I was 19 so at least at that time I could still function without much sleep. Still wasn't good for me, but still. I lasted about 6 months...when winter break came and I went home for it...that's when it all hit me. My then boyfriend and I broke up, and that was really the thing that broke it all.

I just remember sitting at my mom's kitchen table going over my brother's High School Senior pictures and when we were done I closed my laptop just shaking like no other. I didn't think it all the way through it was just a sudden thing I said. "Mom I think I have to move home." I remember the look on her face...and a squeak of okay, and then her going to her room and crying. It was never talked about why I need/wanted to come home. I never will probably know why she went and cried. It's all weird. Few days later my brother and I drove to Portland, did my exit stuff for the school, packed all my shit into the car, said goodbye to sa few people, and drove home in a day. It was a very long and emotional day for sure. 

Very long and emotional time in general. Years went on and when I turned 23 years old the next day I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. At 23 fucking years old...like okay good it finally happened, but wow. Then again I ignored a lot of things that would have probably helped with a sooner diagnosis...for more than just the Bipolar. 

It's amazing what we feel is needed to keep us "normal"...whatever that is. I really feel growing up I saw that if you don't acknowledge it then it's not a problem kind of thing. I've learned later in life now that, that in fact is not correct (haha). It's okay to get or need help. Taking medication is not a bad thing. Going to therapy can be a good benefit. It's okay to be open (to an extent I suppose). It's okay to express yourself. Repressing things does NOT help anything. I was miserable for so long. I'm at least content and happier than I ever have been now. 

If anyone reads this and needs help or to talk...I'm here, but also it's okay to seek help from others. Take the steps you need in order to help yourself. The first step is always avocating for yourself. If you need someone there to hold your hand, talk to randomly, or anything I'll do it. I get it and it's not an easy thing to do. It's nice to have someone understand or at least be there to help and try and understand.

If you are suicidal or thinking of something along those lines...reach out to someone. Or even call a hotline. 988 is the Suicide and Crisis hotline. If you have even a slight thought about needing to have to call the hotline or someone you trust DO IT. It can help so much. You are NOT alone in this life! Reach out. Do what you need to, to get help and feel better. 

Enough Said. 

[lackingselfdisipline]

why is it so hard to lose weight on antipsychotics. i’m so scared to gain anymore weight

#ed #biploar #antipsychotics #edtumblr

[isawken]

Sleep Paralysis Demons HATE Her!!!

EXCLUSIVE interview with the nightmare realm's most frustrating target: "I take 100 milligrams of Seroquel for sleep each night. Like that's literally it. You'd have to hit me with a baseball bat to wake me up outta that. I guess there's one benefit to being biploar."

[safetlynovamoon]

Nova

no·va

noun

ASTRONOMY

a star showing a sudden large increase in brightness and then slowly returning to its original state over a few months.

Gender identity is such a confusing thing. Not to be confused with sexuality, I've recently been struggling with my gender identity. How do I want to identify? Why do I feel like this?

I thought I knew how I wanted to identify but when he calls me “mamas” my heart melts. I love being feminine but I hate she/her pronouns. He/him doesn’t work either. They/them are closer but still pretty far.

When a nova reaches its highest luminosity it may shine intensely for several days. This may be the reason I identify with novas so harshly. When I reach a certain point, I shine intensely.

And then? I come crashing down. That’s where I differ from novas. I shine all the time. But, I also come crash just as often. It’s a symptom of being biploar. Which, unfortunately, I am.

I’ll never be the same as a nova. I’ll never be as perfect and gorgeous as they are. I won’t burn. But I will find my path. And when I do?

I’ll shine.

[foxxfaggotry]

Bitches want me for my biploar swag and my autistic meltdowns

[tmonea]

As I finished watching the Elisa Lam documentary why was everything so coincidental? Why did She mock a film that was aired in 2005? DARK WATER( I've actually seen it very similar) Who closed the Lid? was it the Maintenance man that found her body? Why did the Hispnanic man say they found her, when we were told he found her? Why is the only employees that came forward was the hotel manager and the maintenance man who could not speak english? Why where there not cameras through out the hotel especially on top of the roof? IF she had an biploar episode you mean to tell me out of a 700 Room hotel No one seen her? I just have so many questions. Why was the Tb out break named Lam-Elisa? Why was the zip code navigating back to the cemetery she was buried? Tb out break was around the the time she was at the hotel and also attended a school where they studied TB? Why did her parents allow her to leave if she was bipolar and unstable sometimes? Was this all planned on elisa behalf so that her parents wouldn't find her unalive? maybe she left to take her life in a place so her parents couldn't find her? I just have a lot of questions. This story makes you feel she committed suicide but also all the other happenings are weird as well

[nangua]

you know the psych nurse i met with was like "you might have biploar" and i was like 'there's no way' but i'm actually reading the stuff and i'm like.... fuck....

[meiack]

i actually meant to have a good night but i feel like i suined it for myself but being blown off once again didn't help either

the bipolar be biploaring

[oneandonlybunnicula]

ok but can i LOVE having biploar disorder? not romanticizing it just saying that i personally don't feel that upset about it. its kinda epic actually to be hypomanic. like YEA i don't eat anything because im too focused on work and YEA i get incredibly angry incredibly easily and then theres also depression but... i dont mind..?? too much ????