#ANYWAY final vent:

[comfortlesshurt]

shhh, I know I talk about my children too much. but you can't stop my love

forgot to include this at first, whoops, but I also added a little daily par tracker so I can see it all in one place! there's a separate sheet where i update my word count every time i think about it, and then this table uses a vlookup to find the most recent word count and show it as a percent and a daily par to finish by the listed due date. (the par column compares between the overall goal and the subgoal and lists whichever par is higher between the two)

[zeldasavefile]

The magic of Majoras Mask is trying to comfort characters who are grieving their future through little acts of kindness. Like, the simple but layered juxtaposition of the joy of marching the chicks around on the third day to a little ocarina tune while the game vibrates every few minutes to signify that the moon is closer and closer to falling....

[dreampearls]

three of them

[themisterhip]

The sillys 🧛😝✨

[starconfessor]

I can't believe it's officially been 15 years since Nana went on hiatus I am undone

[xxplastic-cubexx]

talking to my brother about quicksilver and i was like 'ik him and wanda are twins but he exudes little brother energy so much' and my bro Without Hesitation just went 'well thats what happens when you're the least favorite in the family' and he says this to me, the youngest in our family like 🧍‍♂️

[blitzwhore]

It's always fun experiencing severe mental illness symptoms because of fiction, eh?

[toby-vents]

I hate having bpd I hate still revolving my entire world around someone who left I hate feeling like a shit person or a stalker just for asking people what they’re up to while being no contact I hate that I couldn’t be what they wanted I hate that they don’t want me I hate that I can’t move on I hate that I know they still love me I hate that I keep dreaming about them coming back or having a life with them and then waking up to nothing I hate when my phone says texts are delivered when they didn’t actually deliver i hate thinking about them in everything I see I hate that I talk about them to other people as if they were still my partner and best friend and in my life I hate that I can’t get myself to call them my ex I hate that they won’t tell me why they left I hate that I have to act as if the world is completely fine when my entire world feels like it’s still falling apart when I should be rebuilding by now I hate that I’ve just been drowning myself in hyperfixation media to ignore the void in my schedule and life I hate that I see us in every romantic video or couple in a media I like I hate that i want to grow old with them and they can’t even stand to talk to our best friend about it I hate that everyone thinks they’re the bad guy I hate that there isn’t a bad guy in this situation cause it makes it harder to deal with and I hate that their comfort is all I want and it’s the one thing I can’t have

[withthewindinherfootsteps]

mdzs tumblr post au but it’s just “what were you doing at the devil’s sacrament” (nightless city)

[arirovi]

Now that BnHA is coming to an end, i feel like this eight years being a fan has passed so intensely, and not just for BnHA in general, but as a Bakudeku-Dekubaku fan in particular.

The problem for me, right now, is how much of my perceptions of the series and of Bkdkbk i've been maintained as close i can to my mind and heart.

I dont know how much people, other fans will read this, but now i want to take some of this thoughts out of me, and look if some of this resonate with someone else.

First of all, at the beggining i was an anime only, but at the final of season 2 i cant resisted the anxiety and i run to read the manga. That was a kind of revelation for me. The way Horikoshi showed us his history was so detailed; how he draws the expressions, how much care he puts in the narrative order, how important were the use of the languaje for each character... that was the point of no return to me. And then, i was trapped in this history full of emotions, representation of trauma and a psicologycal insight i dont know i needed to read.

I'm grateful for this history and what represent for so much people that lived so diferent problems, included me.

The Izuku's internal conflicts, the Todoroki plot line, Bakugo's character development, Uraraka's achievments as a hero, AFO plans, Shigaraki's tragic and cruel and preconstructed past, all of this deserved so much analisys that i never can do... i just wanted to said i want to write for them some day, maybe in english or maybe in my native languaje (spanish).

I hope I still have time to dare to do it and then, if anyone would be interested in reading it, it would make me very happy.

Otherwise, I will simply speak to the void full of ghost readers, the same as I was and will be again.

[lannisterdaddyissues]

god why am i so fucking stupid. having adhd is truly a curse and i hate bearing it

[arendaes]

It's 5:30am, I can't sleep because I had a bad night last night and I need to vent.

Sometimes I wonder if not being more open about my offline life is to my detriment, because it never fails that I seem to attract people who see me as someone who's easy to walk all over. So many people I've known both online and off really like to treat me however they like, including being rude, condescending, and sometimes just downright cruelly, but the moment I have enough and draw a line in the sand they just want to wipe it away and tell me all about how I'm the one in the wrong.

I once had a friend who ignored my existence for six months and then got mad when I told her I wasn't coming to her son's birthday party. When I say "ignored my existence", I don't just mean unanswered texts; I mean I worked at a store in town and saw her in there multiple times. Every time I would wave and say hi while she was looking right at me and she would walk right by me as if I wasn't there. She knew I worked there too because we met working there. Literally we went from hanging out every day off we had together to that and still she got mad when I was hurt and just didn't want to come to a child's goddamned birthday party (when I have no kid of my own) because of it. The kid was only a year old so it wasn't like he knew who I was, either.

And online has been worse in a lot of ways. I made a friend a few years ago back when I first started getting involved in fandom. At the time I was resistant to the idea but now I realize I befriended him out of pity, because no one seemed to really want to be involved with him and he'd always been so nice to me. That was a mistake, because it turned out he was an alt-right chud who waited until he thought we were close enough and then started deliberately baiting me into arguments where he'd say horrible shit to me and make me upset and then fucking laugh He admitted it was fun for him to upset me. He stopped laughing when I finally stood up for myself and cut him out of my life, only to repeatedly ignore my requests for him to leave me alone. He would send me messages and like my posts, along with asking his friends to do the same and even writing a fic about one of my favorite characters where an unnamed OC treated said character poorly (all while said OC said things that were word for word things I said to him in out last conversation) and posting it where he knew I'd see it. Thankfully his conscience got the better of him with that last one and he took it down just a few days after posting, but the damage was done. He's the reason my ask box is closed most of the time and I have it set to where only followers can message me or comment on my posts. I think he's moved on - I hope he's moved on - but I live with this ever-present fear he hasn't and if I let my guard drop he'll start again.

And this is just two of the biggest incidents in a long line of family members saying I can't have boundaries with them because they're faaaamily and honest conversations with friends about how they've hurt me only to have them turn around and blame that hurt on myself. I'm just...so confused about what I can even do anymore. It feels like no matter what I do I just attract people who want to use and abuse my good nature. Hell, it's been so bad that I typed that and immediately thought "are you good-natured or do you just have an unnecessarily high opinion of yourself?" Which I know is the brain demon talking, but sometimes it's hard to drown it out, especially when this is all I've ever known.

[ace-geographer]

Well Questies a lot has happened this week, and I finally have free time, so please enjoy these long overdue Willow text post memes

Part 18/?

Credit to cap-that.com for the images (it's only just occurring to me that I haven't included a credit tag whoops)

[tzufcallsmeshomps]

Why did it take my landlords' young kid pulling a prank on me to realize I do in fact have unprocessed ptsd

[hiraethwrote]

aight, vent post rotting in drafts

we’re rerouting the depression hours — we’re gonna try at least

remember i love you and i am proud of you, and you did not deserve what they did to you — good night 🩷

[kkoct-ik]

the lesser known did symptom of not knowing anything about your life because not only do you not remember anything (and the memories you Do have are heavily fragmented so you have no idea when they occured), but you also consistently destroy all traces of yourself during dissociative episodes. rip every diary ive tried to keep and almost every social media account. i will never know what i got up to or who i was during those years

i have a spreadsheet i use for documenting memories that turn up before i can forget them again. where i also do my best to estimate what year or season or month they came from. but its all just such a mess. even 2021 onwards which are supposed to be my therapy years are very very patchy. i wish i could just know my life