#ANYWAY .. I just hate the whole concept that I never know how I'm going to feel . How am I ever going to move to scotland and publish

[eloiseyybish]

Does anyone else think about how kinda problematic it is for people to just assume that Eddie is gay because of how he has treated his wife and gfs?

He was a bad husband to Shannon, but I'd always assumed (based off we know from canon) that he felt guilty for getting Shannon pregnant and married her due to the pressure he felt from the Church and both their Catholic families (THIS is where the Catholic guilt comes is friendos - not exactly related to latent homosexuality).

Not to mention, Eddie needs THERAPY and a lot of it to deal with his unhealthy relationship with his grief. Like, the whole point of the Kim arc is to show that he has unresolved feelings for Shannon. Ultimately, he knew she was going to leave him, and then she died before they got the chance to actually talk further about what that meant. He never got that closure from the relationship that he may have gotten from her if they managed to go through with the divorce she wanted. At the end of the day, Eddie looks back on his time with Shannon with rose tinted glasses because his memory is being selective (something that happens in grief a lot, you remember what you want to remember and forget the...less good times), and sees her as the big love of his life because of that. Not to mention, he started having panic attacks with Ana because (and they actually say this in the ep) it was becoming a ready-made family (which ties back to his unresolved feelings for Shannon and her role as both Eddie's wife and Chris' mother...). It felt like Ana was stepping straight into Shannon's place, and Eddie struggled with that whole concept.

Not to mention, Eddie has been a terrible boyfriend to every single woman he's dated and it's so deeply problematic to say that he's treated them badly because he's gay. Like, do you see how bad that is?

It's actually super misogynistic to say that if he suddenly started dating Buck that he would treat him so much better and be a great boyfriend to him... just because... he's a man. Eddie (in his current state) would be a terrible partner to anyone!

Also, just a little note here, I'm not saying you can't have headcanons for characters, but the insistence that Eddie is a gay man because "there's no other explanation for how he's treated the women he's dated" is actually so harmful, not just to women but also to gay men.

I just wish people would think a bit more about the things they say and what the meaning behind what they're actually saying.

Anyway, sorry for the rant (and you can disagree with me if you want, that's what fandom is for, but don't start sending me hate because you will just be blocked, I don't have the energy)

[meo-eiru]

*cracks knuckles* here I am again. this time with Micah as my victim

so at first,

you definitely should add some more story to him. so far, if I'm being honest, he feels a bit too plain to me. but oh boy, what a potential I see here!

alright lets begin

omg look at him! such a hypocrite! how smart it is, to put all blame on MC while being just as (actually even more) sinful. and he sure hides well; it's your fault, isn't it? oh you and your sinful mind.

buut despite him not really being my cup of tea, I still do like a good old concept of ugly insides, hidden behind a beautiful shell (if that's the vibe you were going for).

Micah seems so pure, so holy, almost like an angel (you played smart by adding a lot of white in his design) – but behind that pristine facade? he's ugly. and that shell eventually starts to crack, because no matter how pure he may seem, Micah is just as human as we are, and definitely not a good one. and what are we, if not a bunch of cruel, egotistical animals? and deep inside he's exactly that, sickeningly human. with that in mind the very first comic you did abt him is actually pretty hilarious to me. your desires? what about his desires, which are strong enough to ruin your whole life?

I kinda feel like he's also a little pathetic in his own way; if he can't make you fall for him, he will break you. isn't it like a very cowardly move? he wants you badly enough to use whatever method it may require to have you, but will never admit it.

but let's talk about that strange desire to destroy MC's purity. why? to make you just as dirty as he is? cute, but doesn't seem like a full explanation to me. he's a priest, right? and even despite those dark insides of his, I feel like Micah still kept at least some of the priest mindset. I mean, they're raised and taught with a very strict discipline. so I feel like deep down, he feels bad (not ashamed, but in a "how dare they" way) for his attraction to you, and punishes you for that attraction. it's not your fault, of course, but who cares? you managed to destroy his perfect, clean facade, which he was methodically building for his whole life with simply your existence. isn't that unfair? so now you must fall into the depths of hell with him.

I like how we can't justify him. Micah is perfectly aware of what he is doing. and of twisted nature of his feelings too, I think, yet still chooses to indulge in his desires, even if it hurts you, the person he was supposed to love and cherish. he makes me feel an absolute, poetic rage, and I love a character I can hate. (don't get me wrong, it meant to be a praise)

and I absolutely adore his design. also if I was on point with the idea you meant for him, that is wonderful too. if a character makes me feel something, I like that character. but girl, you really should add more details about him. because everything I've written here is, basically, just my own brainstorming and bare theories. Micah needs to have more meat on him for a full character analysis >_>

but anyway, I actually have a question.

what if MC wasn't in any way pure? what if they're a complete opposite of that word? count it on my love for hunchback of notre dame

unlike the nun MC, I suggest a MC who fully embraces their sins. like an evil succubus, they enjoy the joys of being tainted. they know what influence they have on their dear Father Micah, and isn't ashamed of that. I feel like that would make a pretty interesting story

(cough cough draw him blushing and moaning and my life is yours darling)

Another absolutely incredible ask I'll have a field day answering.

I do agree with him being a bit under developed at the moment. Micah was a bit unfortunate as in he was never meant to be an actual character. He was just a momentary creation who existed for me to study color theory. A beautiful man of flowers who didn't have an identity.

Then he joined the cast when I was busy with working on commissions and the 5k celebration comic so I didn't have the time to draw his introduction comic with the things I had planned for him, though I've been trying my best to explore him a bit more thru asks like this one. The fact that I don't want to spoil the stuff I'll draw in his comic is also holding me back a little.

I think Micah is evil, but not completely bad. A man who was born twisted, who was raised into goodness, and even with all the love he received never truly got rid of his inner darkness, but just once, just for one moment, I think he had good in his heart. And that is when he first saw you.

With all his twistedness, all his evilness, all his darkness, I think that love he felt for you was truly pure. Because in his eyes you appeared truly beautiful, like a pure lily.

But Micah isn't a pure man, neither does he want to be. So he prefers to pull you down to his level, so that you two can be sinful together. A truly impure way of feeling that pure and innocent love.

I have gotten asks about him with a more rowdy darling, one who isn't a nun or one who is more sinful. I've been really brainstorming about it but I don't think it would work. Not because I personally can't force the story into being like that but because I think it was just not meant to be like that.

You see I do come up with the characters, but I don't control their actions. If the character is unwilling I can't shape the story to my will. Because that story is their life and they control it. The best I can do is to try to fill the gaps I can.

I might prefer submissive yanderes, I might want Micah to have a more sinful darling instead but it wouldn't be Micah's story anymore. That's one of the reasons why he's so different from the rest of the boys. I'm not super into very dominant guys, I could probably count the ones I have with one hand, it wasn't my intention for Micah to be the way he is, but I don't think he could've been any other way.

Micah was just meant to be manipulative, a gaslighter, a dirty man who'll pull anything to push you below him.

I guess me looking at my stories from an actual novel or manga perspective also contributes to this. Father Micah exists to shine with a darling who he can soil.

Now the darling can maybe go against him in the future, she might rebel or give in to his sinful ways, but that's a different story.

[homunculus-argument]

Anime concept: One of those Group Of Heroes On An Adventure - animes that start out upbeat, cute, lighthearted and funny, but which keeps getting steeply more serious and dramatic as the story goes on. There's a wide range of characters and unfortunately one of them is the Comic Relief Pervert whose "oh I just cannot help myself I am so pathetic ówò" bullshit - and the female characters' various responses to being sexually harrassed - are played for laughs.

And halfway through the first season, the party gets split and the characters are dealing with their own challenges in groups of two or three. The Kindest Sweetest Girl Ever and the Comic Relief Pervert end up in some situation where the latter is trapped in a way that he can't escape, but the Sweet Girl could easily save him by doing something really simple, like pulling a lever, flicking a switch, just moving her hand, and he pleads her to do it, fully expecting her to, because come on, obviously she's the Sweet Girl who's never been mean to anyone, ever.

And instead she smiles sweetly and asks: "Do you have any idea how much I've always hated you?" And calmly watches him get consumed by whatever death had been prepared for him. Snapping out of this sweet, catharhic satisfaction she looks around to make sure nobody saw that, and turns out that somebody did. Another character of the party, the Chaotic Neutral At Best Loose Cannon Fighter Woman who frequently has to be kept on leash to keep her from causing destruction that'd compromise the party's goals. And she famously fucking hates The Sweet Girl. She had just been silently standing in the background, unseen at a distance, this whole time. Saying nothing, she disappears back into the shadows.

Once the party is re-united, everyone starts giving their accounts of what happened to each of them. Somebody asks The Sweet Girl what happened to the Comic Relief Pervert, since the two of them were last seen together. Everyone knows she doesn't know how to lie, and she stammers, when the Loose Cannon interrupts, saying oh yeah he died, real tragic. This girl totally did everything she could to save him. Which wasn't much because we all know she's fucking pathetic but I'm almost impressed by the absolute heroism she displayed back there. Too bad he was beyond redemption. Anyway at least we're all free of hi- I mean sure we're all going to mourn him now. Anyway what's for dinner.

It doesn't even cross anyone's mind to consider the possibility that The Sweetest Girl Ever could hurt anyone - she can't even kill enemies - or that the Fighter Woman would side with her on anything. And The Sweet Girl looks to her in awe, astonished that this woman who hates her would pass up the opportunity to throw her under the bus when it was served to her on a platter. And the Loose Cannon just silently glares at her, with a distinct "if you ever speak to anyone about this again, I will fucking kill you" look.

And they never speak of it again.

[stormberry-12]

Hellooo how are you this fine evening..

I wanted the ask if you could make one for jj where he does something that upsets the reader and she’s crying and sad and jj gets the silent treatment the whole week but he starts to cry hard and beg for her to talk to him and reader can’t help but comfort and hug him and give him all the love that she has and jj is all pouty and sad in the end

It’s fine if not <3 :)

didn't mean to ~ jj maybank x reader

pairing: JJ Maybank x Kook!Fem!Reader

warnings: language, angst, arguing, silent treatment.

notes: thxs for the request! Sorry I haven't posted in forever guys, im doing final exams at school rn and stuff. Also, sorry this is so short. But anyway, I loved this concept and also hated the way they solved JJ and Kie's fight in Season 3 so I tried to recreate it here with a better ending. Sorry, this took so long lol, much love!

"I mean, it would all blow up anyway. You know? Like... Look at you. You got your new threads on!" JJ exclaimed. "Look at me. What do I got? This? This piece of shit?" He threw something out of frustration, panting. You looked back at his run-down house, the eviction notice nailed to the front door with bright yellow police tape crossing over it.

"Getting kicked out of this place in three weeks anyway. shit, I don't even got parents right now. Why would you care? Why would you care? I'm just some loser that..."

"JJ..."

"You don't care. No, you don't!"

"I do care!" you shouted, getting frustrated with his attitude.

"No, you got parents that live in Figure Eight, you know?"

"That's not my fault."

"That's your future." he countered walking towards the water, hand running through his hair in frustration.

"Look, if you need us, we're gonna help you. I'm... I'll help."

"No- It's that right there! Okay? Like... It's so easy for you to say that." he whirled around to face you, yelling, "You know why? Because you're a Kook. You're a Kook, Y/n!"

"Yeah... I'm a Kook. I was such a Kook when I was living in a cave with you for a month! Soaking in the Kook life!"

"That's not what I'm talking about. GOD!" he exclaimed, reaching for his bike, he swung his leg over the seat.

"Jayj, don't leave." you pleaded, the engine of his bike revved and he started to drive away,

"JJ, WHAT THE HELL?" You screamed after him, tears rolling down your face, "MAYBANK!"

You were pissed the fuck off.

The first day after your fight you hadn't seen JJ, you cried for a couple hours, indulging in your favorite ice cream watching a sad rom-com, really getting in your feels.

Kie texted you to ask you what was up, the pogues had gone fishing that day but you never showed, to angry and sad to show your face to the world.

'Ask the blond kid,' was all you responded. you watched as her three typing bubbles flashed beneath your text.

'shit head's not here either,' she responded. 'wtf is going on,'

'fight. he called me a kook.'

'oh shit,' was all she said.

A few days later you walked around the chateau and dug through John B's fridge, you were fully aware of JJ's presence on the couch but still continued to ignore him. It was closing in on a week since you had last uttered a word to him.

Grabbing a chilled beer you walked past JJ and to the front door.

"Y/n," he said, voice cracking.

It wasn't the first time JJ had tried to talk to you this week and once again you ignored him. You slipped your shoes on and walked out onto the porch, slamming the door behind you. You flinched at how harsh it was but brushed the feeling away as you took a sip of your drink.

You sat at the edge of JJ's hot tub, the disco lights twinkled in the water, and the beer started to make you feel nauseous. You set it down and let out a shaky breath, blinking away tears that made the colorful lights spur in all different directions.

'Oh stop it Y/n' you told yourself, you would not cry anymore over this boy, if he didn't want to date a 'kook' that was his problem.

A long time must have passed, you had slid down fully into the hot tub finishing off your drink and basking in your own thoughts. The sun had set and the tides changed across the water.

"Go!" You heard someone on the deck grunt, you looked up to see John B pushing JJ out the door towards you locking him outside. JJ made his way down the stairs awkwardly and stood at the edge of the hot tub across from you, not getting in like he was looking for your permission.

"What do you want Maybank?" you asked quietly.

"I-uh," he sniffled and you focused closer in the dim light to see tears streaming down his face. "I made you a bracelet,"

He mumbled in the softest voice that made your heart clench and reached out to hand it to you. You looked at it closely, intricate little hearts knotted into the design, made with your favorite colors. And of course, the sea blue strings that you had told him reminded you of his eyes countless times. You didn't know what to say. Until you heard the soft sobbing coming from his lips, he thought you didn't like it.

"No, JJ..." you cooed, wrapping the bracelet around your wrist and tieing it in a crisp knot. You slid yourself through the water and stood in front of him taking in his state. He looked at you with pleading eyes and you wrapped your arms around him. He collapsed into you, wrapping his arms around your waist and burying his face in your shoulder. You felt butterflies in your stomach at his touch and lifted a hand to stroke his hair. God you loved this boy so much.

"I-i'm sorry," he cried, "I called you a kook, I'm such a dick, It's all my fault..."

"No, Jayj-" you whispered.

"Yes,"

"No, I am in the wrong too, shouldn't have ignored you like that," you whispered.

"But I called you a kook," he said again.

"And then I was acting like one, it was wrong,"

You stood there in silence hugging each other, you you feel his breathing slow and he recovered to look up at you.

"Please forgive me," he said.

"Always, as long as you forgive me," he nodded frantically at you causing you to giggle.

"Thank god that's over," you heard Pope say in the distance.

"Yeah, pass me one of those?" Kie said, taking a beer out of the cooler, the rest of the pogues walking toward the hot tub.

You all settle down in the warm water, JJ snuggling into your side, looking at your bracelet sweetly for the rest of the night. You kissed the top of his head, knowing what ever happed in the future you could always get through it with him.

[tossawary]

Thinking about how hard the "Star Wars" prequel films dropped the ball in terms of female representation. Like, looking back on the original trilogy, it kind of sucks that the only main female character is Leia, and while Leia does kick ass and I love her, it also sucks that the last film 1) put her in that bikini and 2) abruptly made her Luke's twin but didn't let her have a lightsaber or use a lot of the cool space magic powers.

When you only have one female character, she often ends up bearing the unintended burden of a lot of hopes and expectations of fans. She's just one person. She's never going to be compelling to everyone.

And then you have the prequels and you'd hope that they'd do a little better with male-female ratios this time? With experience? But the only main female character is Padmé, who's pretty fun, but also ends up 1) desperately in love with a murderer, 2) spending most of the last movie barefoot and pregnant, staring out a window, because they cut the "founding of the Rebellion" plotline, and 3) dying not because she was Force-choked but because she has "lost the will to live" because "fuck them kids", I guess.

(I know there's theories about Sidious siphoning her life force or what the fuck ever, but I don't caaaaare, because I hate the idea that Sidious has that kind of reach for no fucking reason and also it's not actually IN the movies! It doesn't count!)

The Nubian handmaidens are a cool concept, but they're all background characters, who barely get named. We don't get to actually see them and Padmé do a lot of on-screen work together. She doesn't get to confide in them regarding her love or her fears. She speaks to her guard captain more onscreen than her handmaidens.

And while we do see female members of the Jedi Order in the films, they're ALSO all background characters, like Jocasta Nu and Aayla Secura and Yaddle. As opposed to more active Jedi characters like Qui-Gon Jinn or Mace Windu. Like, damn, the prequels are the perfect opportunity to introduce and show off even a female Jedi supporting character, and they just did not do that. That sucks. The careless absence of women in this universe sucks. The careless absence of women as significant characters in these films sucks.

Every other piece of additional material for "Star Wars" has to move to patch this. The "Jedi Apprentice" and "Jedi Quest" novels strive to add and name female agemates and mentors. "The Clone Wars" television shows add Ahsoka as a protagonist and Ventress as a villain and a whole bunch of new female characters.

Yes, given that these are prequels, there are some characters who are not really realistically changeable. (Yes, trans people exist, obviously, that would be very cool; not sure that "Star Wars" was going to go for that back in 1999.) Obi-Wan. Anakin. Yoda. The Emperor. Unnamed Sad Mother of Luke and Leia. You need those ones. EVERYTHING ELSE was up for whatever they wanted to do.

So, anyway, I'm currently thinking about characters you could potentially genderbend without affecting the story pretty much at all. Qui-Gon, obviously. Mace Windu, as well. I think fandom would then hate both of these characters even more then, unfortunately, because fandom is what it is. Whatever legitimate criticisms levied at both of these imperfect characters would have increased tenfold, I am certain of it. But we're talking about the prequels's badly executed stories, not fandom's misogyny. (And misogynoir. A black woman as the leader of the Jedi Order when it was destroyed by the Sith? Fandom would have been even more of a fucking nightmare.) It would suck that they both die, but the prequels are a tragedy anyway, so, eh.

Bail's role in the prequels could have potentially been played by Breha Organa instead. Although, I don't know how well the Extended Universe novels had extended Leia's backstory by that point in time, maybe Bail had already been established as the Senator and Breha as Queen, so maybe not. At the very least, you could have had Mon Mothma in there doing his superspy stuff with him or something. Padmé's guard captain could have been a woman.

Both Darth Maul and Count Dooku could have been women. Yes, they're both evil, and yes, they both die, so it's not perfect on the representation front. But it's something, especially if you balance that out with some good characters, and look, I can't coherently complete this thought, I keep getting distracted by the mental image of hot evil Sith ladies. I think a female Count Dooku would have kicked ass, honestly, as much as I enjoy Christopher Lee in the role.

My main goal with this thought exercise is purely upping the number of plot-relevant female characters, pointing out that it wouldn't have been hard to add more women without changing all that much if anyone involved had actually bothered to think about that.

The original trilogy only mentioned "The Clone Wars", so the clone army didn't all need to be copies of Jango Fett. There could have potentially been a half-dozen genetic donors, with the Kaminoans creating different clone soldiers for different purposes. Some of them could have been clones of women. (I hold the unpleasant headcanon that the clone soldiers are all sterile (or functionally sterile, incompatible with unmodified humans) anyway, because the Kaminoans don't want clients to be able to "steal" their work.) And the clones are actually a fairly minor role in the films themselves, admittedly, not given any more development than any of the droids (it's the show that does the work), but again, it's still something more.

[ponett]

Heya inspiring dev here, I'm brain-storming for a game concept based on classical RPGs (specifically on the 2000s Tales Of titles), I wanted to ask as somebody who's being a big fan of RPGs and a game developer yourself, what is the one big sin in terms of design you should avoid doing for a game in vein of the games of that era?

This might not be a particularly helpful response, but I generally shy away from "always do this"/"never do this" type game design advice these days. What works for one game might not work for another, and what sucks in one game might be exactly what another game needs. It's all about execution, and knowing how different choices enhance or detract from the overall experience you're trying to craft.

Players tend to vocally dislike anything that inconveniences them. Random encounters, for example. Everyone says they hate those. But random encounters have their place! They can be used effectively, and you can also design around them to make them more palatable for a modern audience, or you can just use them exactly how the classics did if that's the experience you're going for. People complain about limited inventory space, but having a smaller number of items usually means players will actually use what they have, rather than sitting on a stockpile of 99 of everything "just in case they need it later." People say they hate ice sliding puzzles in games, but I put some in SLARPG because I thought that was what that section of the game needed and by god, I'd do it again!!!

Uhhh anyway for a small piece of actual actionable advice: it's annoying when there's an incredibly long cutscene directly before a boss fight and you have to watch the whole thing again if you die and try again. Being able to fast forward dialogue or outright skip a scene is good, but so is structuring things so that longer dialogue scenes tend to come after bosses rather than before them, or placing a point where the player can stop and save between the long dialogue scene and the boss fight.

Also PS1/PS2 era JRPGs (especially FF) were often obsessed with including tons of obscure missable items that you could permanently lock yourself out of obtaining by progressing the story too far. Again, I won't say this is something you should never do - the argument can easily be made that this increases replayability, or that it encourages players to talk to their friends about secrets. But it can get frustrating if you do it too much, and it can encourage paranoid behavior in players.

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

I would really like to know how and why some of my fellow Brits have absorbed the whole "if none of us were any different (language/culture/identity) we would all understand each other better and it would be great" like my bro has said before that he thinks it would be better if only one language exists (I don't think he cares which one) I'm just ?????????? But we can try to understand each other without being the same?????

It's a dominant culture thing. A well-meaning, left-leaning one, but a dominant culture thing. This is a view held by people who don't feel any particular connection to their own culture or language, because it's dominant - it's 'default' and therefore universal and unremarkable.

This means they can't relate to the idea of belonging to your own cultural unit/sub-group. BUT:

It also goes hand in hand with being well-meaning, and left-leaning. They come from a dominant culture - meaning, one that gets imposed on others a lot, which they don't like. So they reject the notion of borders and nationhood and that, because to them, that's a negative, right wing, oppressive concept. It's in the name of nationalism that all the oppression happens; so nations are bad, right? Drawing divisions is bad, right? Dividing ourselves rather than all getting along is bad, right?

(Most famous example of this, by the way, is the song "Imagine". John Lennon was, for all his many and varied flaws, a well-intentioned man, who fell in love with an Asian woman and got subsequently FLOODED with racist abuse for it (as did Yoko Ono). He wrote "Imagine" partly as a response to that. No religion, no borders, no nations... no divisions to hate each other over. Just harmony and love.)

Seems nice, doesn't it?

But it ignores what everyone in a non-dominant culture knows and understands - that there's a difference between division and diversity, and that a single centralised authority ruling over all is Bad, Actually. People's needs go unnoticed. If you belong to a marginalised outgroup of some form, nationalism can have a great many positive benefits, because it's defending your culture and right to exist and giving you a voice that is otherwise lost. Why should we have a single homogenous culture? It'll never happen, regardless - that's not how humans work. Culture is literally the shared set of norms and values in a group. That will always adapt and change wherever there's a mass of people. And that is a good thing, because different perspectives are a good thing.

In fact, with regards to language, I always think a three-tier structure is what we need. I'm actually not against the concept of a lingua Franca, be it Esperanto or anything else. It would indeed be highly useful to have a global language for communication. But specifically for global communication - within a nation/cultural group/etc, you have the one(s) that's native to you and helps define you as a people, and then at a local level you have your dialect that unites you as neighbours. To me, for a healthy society, you need all three of those. (I have similar thoughts about currencies and economies but that is irrelevant here.)

Anyway, those are my personal thoughts, obvs

[random-twst-things]

Question - of all the characters, who: doesn't know twst isn't a dating sim, knows it's not but aims for it anyway, knows and suffers, and doesn't know - just vibing? Feel free to add more categories

Oooh! That's an interesting concept. I had to think about this for a while bc I wanted this to be the most accurate I could make it. And I'm SO sorry this took so long, I got busy with school and first semester tests I'm so sorry 😭

Contains: Tiny(very tiny) bit of possessiveness(Malleus) angst(?)(idia, jamil, azul, cater, sebek) most certainly some spelling mistakes here and there (English is not my first language I'm srry 😭)

Doesn't know twst isn't a dating sim:

Riddle: Did you really think Riddle would even know what a dating sim is? Absolutely not, especially not with the way he grew up. He has no idea why he loves you (he does, he's just in denial) he's so shy trying to pursue you, he has this act he tries (tires) to put up but it's so easy to see the effect you have on him. He's not as strict on you about the rules as he is the rest, he seems to have developed a soft.

Trey: (I'm so sorry, I don't know much about the guy 😭) Gentleman. That's its. Ty for coming to my TED talk. Okay, but srsly, hear me out on this; He's a whole gentleman when he has a crush. He definitely uses his great baking skills to his advantage with you. He definitely sees how others look and act around you, I mean, who wouldn't when it comes to you. Wanna learn how to bake? He'll gladly teach you and take this as a chance to get to know you even more.

Ace(1): I honestly don't think he'd know twst isn't a dating sim. He's mosy definitely smug about being close to you, after all he is your best friend, right? Bro thinks he has rizz but he's just a fumbling mess when he tries it just makes him look clumsy (sorry ace)

Deuce: he's so sweet. He's glad he's one of your best friends and get to be close to you without worry. Part of his delinquent side does come out a little when it comes to you, it's not directed to you! Not at all! More like directed towards those who did you wrong and didn't even try to say sorry. Don't worry, he won't do anything to reckless! He still wants to be an honor student after all. He's gonna do his very best for his mom and you.

Ruggie: oui, he's hard to tell on what category. He likes you. He likes how you are. It never bothered him one bit that your home was semi broken. God, the things he would think and want to say to you (He's romantic like that yall), but he's too shy to actually say (yall he's making me blush eeeee)

Kalim: he's too busy hanging out and being happy with you he doesn't even notice. All he knows is that he loves you and wishes to show you the world (see what I did there? Eh? Eeeh?) He's not at all shy about the compliments he gives you, he's really creative with them, tho. Invites you to every single one of his parties and makes you take home as much food as you want.

Epel: He's going for you most definitely, even with all these people. He does his very best to look strong and manly in front of you, that it's cute. He doesn't really mind if you call him cute or pretty, if that's what you like, but he's still gonna act (only a little) like he hates it, but he never tells you to stop.

Floyd(1): Two words; good luck. This guy will not try to hide his favoritism with you. He will not hide his desire to steal you or keep you from the rest. His very (very) open about it, too. It doesn't even matter if he knew twst wasn't a dating sim. He's still gonna be the same. You don't mind his (bone crushing) hugs? He's allowed to squish you? ....you shouldn't have said that bc now every time he sees you he squeezes you so tight he cracks your sore muscles like those chiropractors on TikTok.

Jade: hmmmm (good luck, again) He's a gentleman, but in an offsetting way, yk? He's the silent one. The type to smile when provoked and just bc, it's hard to tell the difference but its there. He's a watcher. He knows almost all of your special interests (Don't ask how he knows that). Putting the creepy aura behind, he's a nice guy (?) He'll most definitely rant about his mushrooms to you. You don't mind? You like hearing about his mushrooms? Oh my.... good luck

Malleus(?): I feel like he does, but doesn't at the same time? I don't think he knows what a dating sim is, but he notices the way the others act and look at you. He notices the way things seem... different. But he isn't one to back down when something precious to him is to be taken away from him. He is a dragon, after all. (Not that he'd let that happen to begin with, you'll love him dearly in the end....won't you?) Talks to you about his gargoyles, all the different facts. You dont mind the long talks about it? Youre asking to know more?? Oh great sevens....

Silver: (AWWWWW) he's so sweet. He tries so hard to show he likes you but in such a subtle way that it's hard to catch on it even notice. He's a gentleman at heart. He loves how understanding you are of his sudden sleepiness and tiredness and don't get angry at him for something he can't control as much as he'd love to. You wanna watch over him while he sleeps? Why? Oh, so nothing harms him when he's asleep? Oh dear... His heart is beating so fast he might not even be able to sleep now (he does anyways, but with tinted cheeks)

Knows it's not but aims for it anyway:

Leona: he's the type of guy to somehow always know something you don't expect him to know. Anyways. The dude could care less if the game wasn't designed to be a dating sim. He's still going for it in his own way. Unlike the past, this is something he can't give up on. you're something he can't give up on. But oh, is this man so so smug when he uses you as a pillow.

Vil: it's either Rook told him or he figured it out on his own before Rook told him. Even if twst wasn't meant to be a dating sim with love, he will turn zero into something like he's always done. He will by any means do his utmost and his best to pursue you all while being himself. He cherishes the moments you have alone when he's giving you advice on how to take care of your skin. The small and soft lingering touches when he teaches you how to apply moisturizer correctly.

Rook: Okay, he's bound to find out twst isn't a dating sim. He's a sharp guy. Even with the knowledge of knowing twst isn't a dating sim, it isn't going to stop him from pursuing you. He himself finds this situation funny with how many hearts you've captured even with twst not supposedly being capable of that. Oh? How did you know he was watching you? You could feel him? Oh dear trickster you sure do know how to pull his heart strings.

Floyd(2): Good luck once again. I couldn't decide whether he knew or not. But! Same situation regardless. Instead, tho, he's a bit more.... more him? He's gonna find this all so much more hilarious and funny.

Lilia: This cheeky old man most definitely knows. He's seen dating Sims and knows what they are. Just bc twst isn't designed to be a dating sim doesn't mean he can't aim for it. He's not at all shy when it comes to pursuing you. He's been alive for hundreds of years, what's there to be afraid of?

Knows and suffers:

Cater: (I'm so sorry, I had to 1.0) cay-cay gonna slay-slay, more like cry-cry. I feel like he's a "2nd male lead syndrome" type of guy, yk?? It's a bit hard to explain, but yeah. Anyways. 2nd male lead, we all know how that ends, don't we? (Hint: tears) He's cautious when it comes to love, hes scared of it at times. He does know he loves you but he's going to watch you being happy instead. He wishes you the best, truly! (he hates the little feeling in his chest when he says those words bc his words and actions say their happy for you, but the little feeling in his chest says otherwise)

Azul: he loves you, he really does, but would you? He knows he isn't the ideal guy. He knows he's done some shady things. And most of all, he knows (thinks) that with all these suitable people for you, he'd never be considered a choice. So he's content with just watching you from afar living a happy life. Every time you enter the lounge he finds himself between wanting to hide away or catering to your every need but he knows that if he gets any closer to you it'll just hurt more in the future.

Jamil: He's a smart guy, he knows. He also knows that he doesn't stand a chance with all these suitors going after you. A prince, an heir, a model/actor, knights, etc. He'd like to think he did stand a chance, but standing next to them, he can't help but let his insecurities get the better of him. But, oh... when you offer to help him with his chores he can't help but think that maybe... Just maybe there's a chance.

Idia: he most definitely knows, I mean, look at the way they all look at you!! He knows and suffers with the thought that he'd never stand a chance. You're being pursued by all these SSR characters!!! Surely you'd never pick someone like him when you could do so much better. He'd stuff himself in his room even more (if that's even possible) He'd avoid you even with his tablet. Every time he rejects the offer when you invite him to play video games he hates himself even more. Stop giving him false hope... Please

Sebek: (I'm so sorry 2.0) Malleus. That's why. His master, he can't seem to accept that his master would aim for a human like you, but he's hurt. He doesn't know why he feels that way. He doesn't understand why his chest hurts when he sees malleus and you interacting in such a way. (He'll begin to understand after a while, WHILE) once he realizes why it hurts, he is distraught. He won't show it, but you can see the subtle changes in his composure every now and then. He knows he has to let you go. He feels as if he has lost you. Lost something that wasn't even his to begin with and never would have been.

Doesn't know and/or just vibes:

Crowley: Dudes clueless

Grimm: he's just confused as to why everyone is after his henchmen. He doesn't know what a dating sim is either.

Ace(2): he's having the time of his life seeing you struggle with all this. He has absolutely no idea why so many are after you, but he's just gonna watch as they all struggle. (He knows why they are after you, after all his best friend in kinda cool, but he'd never admit to that) also has a laugh with watching riddle try (don't tell riddle he said that tho)

Ruggie(2): another that's gonna have the time of his life with this. Laughing like the hyena he is, watching the struggle (especially Leona's struggle 💀)

Jack: He's just vibing. This whole situation is a mess, really. He watches out for you most of the time just in case. (*caugh* floyd *cough*) He's a bit worried for you ngl so he wants to teach you self defense just in case, if you already know how to handle yourself thats great! (*cough* floyd *cough)

Bonus

He does know and tries to be supportive

Ortho: he knows. His brother told him in his ramblings, and he noticed that idia is thinking smth negative. He tries to encourage him in every possible way to just try, that there is a chance, but nothing seems to work.

[aroaceleovaldez]

thoughts on leo valdez? headcdanons? i

[stares at own url] ...I'll give you one for free, lol

Aro/ace Leo.... listen. He explicitly states that he plays up his false persona in aspects that he feels are lacking in his actual personality in an effort to make people like him more, and in his POVs we get a lot of him doing acknowledged-as-nonserious joke-flirting as part of his false persona. Guy who doesn't realize he's aspec trying to overcompensate for his lack of attraction by excessively hitting on people to hide that he doesn't feel attraction towards anyone? Him wondering if he's broken in a whole bunch of ways and trying to make up for it externally while having an identity crisis about that? Something something metaphor about him wondering if cause he's a Hephaestus kid he's a little too much like a machine/robot and can't feel love or The Right Emotions In General™ because of that cause he doesn't know about aspec stuff yet (or that he's autistic)? Can anyone hear me.

Related to that: Leo landing on Ogygia (island of unreciprocated love) and meeting Calypso, who (probably through love magic) actually seems to be attracted to him? And him trying to force himself to reciprocate because he figures that's just how it's supposed to go and maybe for once he's actually experiencing romantic love? And he's so desperate for someone to like him and to feel useful to someone (re: 7th wheel)? But it fizzles out almost immediately after they leave the island, because the heart-eyes wear off for Calypso, especially once she technically no longer needs him, and Leo can't keep up trying to make himself reciprocate (and can't keep up trying to put his mask back up for her, especially now that Calypso seems to actually care about it). I am literally always thinking about this.

Short king,,, I don't care what anybody says he is NOT 5'6" that is way too tall for him. My guy is 5'5" absolute maximum. I usually place him at 5'3". Tiny guy. Made of pipecleaners. Built like Bilbo Baggins...

I've mentioned it before in a couple of places (i know [here] at least) but I did not like his fake-out death in BoO. Also I'm just mad about his dropped character arc(s) in general. My ideal substitute is that instead of dying and being revived, Festus just crashes in the woods nearby and Leo has overexerted his powers too much a la Nico's shadow stuff and is nearly dead but once they get him to the infirmary he recovers and can start working on recovering from his whole depression arc too. Also maybe he loses a leg in the crash so he can match his dad just for funsies, and so that there's some amount of consequence to his sacrifice to make up for him not dying (not like in canon there were any consequences to him dying and being revived anyways...). Also something something accidental Hiccup HTTYD joke. Leo with a prosthetic is always fun. More Hephaestus kids with prosthetics.

I am very amused by the concept of Leo never having any romantic attraction to Hazel at all, possibly even negative romantic attraction once he finds out she dated his great-grandpa (especially since in canon like 90% of his thoughts about Hazel are just kind of appreciative and genuinely thinking she's really cool, if a little confusing at first), and Hazel pretty quickly gets over her side of things once she gets used to the fact that this is Definitely Not Sammy, he just Looks Like Sammy (and does not actually act like Sammy, that's just a fake persona that is eerily similar by coincidence. Real Leo is actually quite reserved and not so much of a vocal goofball most of the time). So they're just besties after their mutual weird Sammy vision and understanding the deeper sides to each other and are each other's person they're most comfortable letting their guard down around cause they've formed that level of trust. Except Frank's over in the corner seething cause he thinks this is a love triangle but he's the only one who thinks that. Leo just thinks Frank hates him for the general reasons he thinks everybody hates him (which is just an assumption he's kind of used to and expects from people, so he does not question it at all). Hazel knows Frank thinks Leo is trying to steal her from him but she's having trouble trying to keep the two of them from nearly killing each other. It's a very homestuck auspistice dynamic.

Leo and Frank eventually work out their stuff and become very good friends to meeee... let them bond over their mutual fear of fire and dead mom trauma! they have so many parallels and I want the two of them and Hazel to be a funky cute little trio!

Dragonkin Leo! That boy is a dragon!!!! I usually say his stuff is kind of spiritual origin (he doesn't really know how to explain it other than his soul is just a dragon) versus like Jason being a wolf therian with a more psychological origin (being raised by an immortal wolf pack rubbed off on him) (rip Piper being the only non-alterhuman in their trio LMAO). I imagine whatever type of dragon he is probably is very similar to Festus, which is part of why Leo clicks with Festus so quickly - he just sees himself in Festus and it's very comforting to him. He definitely makes himself some fun 'kin gear, like a nice weighted tail and wings and claws to try and help his phantom shifts feel a lil less wonky. Also him having dragon talon weapons just sounds cool. He also totally makes gear for any other alterhuman demigods.

[winktalks-com]

NO because that tiny tiny shot of gojo's 6? year old self and the way he looked and the way he spoke means so much. "stop looking at me you weakling" was so serious. this kid is obviously not the 17 year old Satoru we know from hidden inventory. and the fact that there's nothing else (that we know of) that changed from this particular flashback to the time hidden inventory takes place in (EXCEPT him meeting Suguru) just serves to drive the point further that he only really acts like that because of Geto.

Children don't act so mature and if they do they don't magically evolve into carefree childish teens.

Cause we know for a fact from the day he was born gojo was just adored by his family. Like "On the day Gojo Satoru was born the balance of the world was altered" type stuff which I am sure they didn't shy away from saying to his face. And children don't have that concept of power. He likely didn't even understand what he was compared to in terms of strength. I mean i doubt those adults would want to talk about the details of cursed spirits with a kid.

And being told you're supposed to be the strongest can be so scary. I mean sure he already had it in him but did he feel it? I doubt it. People born a certain way can't comprehend life beyond their perception.

And then he joined jujutsu high which- we aren't even told why? Cause clans have the option to train their kids themselves homeschooling style. I'd think they'd wanna keep him as close as possible)

But anyway he joins and here comes this other guy who is just as strong as him who has a very very different outlook on life and who speaks about it so confidently and convincingly that gojo starts trusting him with his whole being.

Like "oh Suguru thinks this so it must be the answer" "Suguru thinks I'm right so that's all that matters" "Suguru thinks I'm wrong so I MUST prove to him that I'm right"

And even if they fought a lot Geto remained his moral compass and all of his opinions stood on the pillars of getos belief system even while directly opposing it.

In hidden inventory after Riko's death Satoru asks Geto if he should kill all of those people. And when the other disagrees he doesn't argue. Because Suguru is always right.

And when Geto defects and kills a bunch of non sorcerers his whole world crumbles because His firend has never been inconsistent or hypocritical before. Cause Geto is suPOSED to always be right. Like fuck you mean you talk about how sorcerers are born to protect regular people and then you go kill a bunch of those people you're supposedly meant to protect?

And sure he's angry. But his whole personality and morality is built around Geto. And he still thinks its the right way to think. So he keeps acting like that because in those 4 years they spent together he forgot how to care about his family's opinion. Because the only opinion that mattered was Geto's.

And if I was Gojo I'd be pretty fucking upset. Because sure its "do as I say not as I do" but Geto didn't make that choice only for himself. And how dare he even think he's wise enough to make that type of decision at 17? At any age. He didn't just choose to kill that whole village he chose every consequence of that action too. He chose to have an execution order placed on his head and he chose to kill his parents after that and he cHOSE to leave Gojo behind.

And that's fucked up like ok you made a mistake?? But don't keep making mistakes just so you don't have to admit it.

I hate them

[cheesycatz]

Worm in the Apple (the Wormton AU fic) is at 120k words! Obviously the worm guy loves apples, fruit, and sugary stuff in general, though it holds no nutritional value for him. It's fitting, since most of the "worms" found in apples are actually just some form of insect, just like how Wormton himself isn't an actual worm. Being as contradicting as possible is his whole thing, I suppose.

May blithering helminth codswallop posthaste be upon thee if thoust must ruminate over thine virulent and insiduous merchant Sir Spammington G. Spammington The Deceitful:

Anyways, I've been struggling to write the depressing crap, so I often like to imagine the ending where they can all be happy together in Castle Town. I interpret Castle Town as a place where darkners are less bound to fate, since it doesn't seem to manifest from the real world, and is made of pure darkness, whatever that means. Wormton wouldn't have to hide anymore, but he would very much be, uh, neutralized if he tries to infect anything. He wouldn't get to have sixteen identical feral worm children that look like slightly smaller mirror images of him crawling all around the place, unfortunately; Castle Town could do without a highly invasive species that eats and destroys everything. I imagine that he'd keep the suit jacket so that he actually has some pockets, as well as to hide himself a little bit. Malworms naturally like to stay outside of the spotlight, so he's not very comfortable without his disguise. Not that being crammed inside his disguise was much more comfortable, but, hey, what other option did he have?

I like to imagine the addisons getting stuck with Wormton in Castle Town due to it having greater population density. I'm considering making it so that they don't even know he's there at first, like those criminal cases where some guy is living in a family's attic for months unnoticed. He'll have the opportunity to harass Swatch, interact with other characters like Lancer, and send "mild" death threats to Rouxls. I think he'd avoid Kris and the other lightners. He tries to kill Kris and absorb the SOUL from the get-go, and the two of them lack that puppet connection, since Wormton never picked up the phone. Still, he does pick up on their stilted movements that mimic his own when he's puppeteering his disguise, and does realize that the SOUL is a little more controlling than he would want, so they eventually reach a peaceful conclusion (This AU follows the pacifist normal route. This cold-blooded mf would probably just go into hibernation and do absolutely nothing if the player did a Weird Route). He's still pissed about them taking his shadow crystal, even if the starry night sky it once let him witness will never shine through its surface again. Kris is such a gremlin from what we know that I think it would he sweet if he valued the fact that, while they find his puppet-like disguise creepy, they're unfazed by his real appearance. Kris can go on his "people I don't fantasize about murdering and eating regularly" list, which might just be his "nestmates :^]" list if he'd actually admit it

Back to writing about him hating himself so much that he can't fathom someone healing him unless it was a transactional favor, hiding in a locked closet with no stimulation because he thinks he's trying to kill Blue whenever he's in an instict-driven half-asleep state (emphasis on thinks), believing the only reason that Blue is worried about him hiding so much is because they want him to leave faster, understanding so little of his actual species that he becomes stressed when he does anything that "isn't normal," Having fits of anger and mental breakdowns and feeling bad about it afterwards, using the worst coping mechanisms known to man, and devouring an entire 16 inch regular crust meat lover's pizza in one sitting

Cover art concept as a lil treat. Probably won't actually draw it until I'm ready to start releasing chapters, but it's fun to think about for now. I'll do my best to live up to expectations as someone with zero experience writing fiction and long-form content in general o7

[monbons]

WIP Wednesday

Posting actual WIPS on a Wednesday? Imagine that.

As long as we are all baring our hearts on tumblr, I have to admit that I have been struggling to write anything since I wrapped up Eternal Life (back in the first week of April). At first I figured I was simply burnt out since I wrote all 42k words of that fic in just about a month, but given that I've started three separate WIPS since then and made zero progress on any of them, I'm wondering if I am just out of stories. I hate all my words--even though I really love some of these concepts. So, as you may have noticed, I've been distracting myself with sewing projects because good progress is so clearly visible there...

Anywho, to motivate myself, I decided to post a snip of each today and hope that having bits out in the world will motivate me to finish at least ONE of them! All untitled. Set up and snips below the cut.

Very creatively titled "Party Robot," this WIP is a silly/fluffy one-shot inspired by an article I read a while ago about a growing trend in American weddings. This one is the furthest along and will likely see the light of day eventually...

A nervous bounce.  From a robot. I recognize that bounce. “I thought you said Shepard was working tonight.” My voice is tight. “He is.” Bunce replies, similarly strained. “What did you say he does again?” Panic rises in my chest.  “He’s in entertain–”  Whether Bunce trails off or I simply don’t hear the rest is irrelevant because the music has changed from easy dinner instrumentals to much-too-loud techno and the show is clearly starting. As the synths build, driving towards a crescendo, my brain reels with the growing realisation that Simon would never just abandon me at the last minute, would never send me anywhere alone, certainly not my cousin’s gay wedding, which is every kind of milestone given his Old Families lineage and Pitch blood specifically and– “PARTY PEOPLE!” The DJ booms into the mic. “Have the grooms got a treat for you!”

A multi-chapter AU I have lovingly nicknamed "Baz in a Bubble." It is sad and angsty and is proving significantly more difficult to execute (despite having a complete outline) than I once thought it would be. Who could have guessed having one home-bound character would make me too sad to write? Thanks to @thewholelemon and @hushed-chorus who've listened to more than their fair share of my griping about this one. Anyway, here's the first bit of BAZ POV:

There are exactly 297 stars in the sky above me. I count them while lying in my bed every night. They do not twinkle or flicker hello like real stars. Instead, they glow a constant yellowish-green that reminds me of the colour artists always make toxic sludge in the cartoons I grew up watching. It's the colour of superhuman villains and their evil plots. Of poison. Of danger. It's the colour of the plastic star stickers Fiona put up on my ceiling when I was 10 and spent the whole year crying and begging her to go outside. Just once. Just for a minute. Because I was starting to forget what fresh air smelled like or how it felt to have grass prickle against your bare feet or how the stars lit up the night sky in Hampshire. There are no stars in the middle of London. Not outside my window. Not in this room.

And then the WIP I have the least progress on (literally almost nothing) but I so desperately want to write and could really use a thought partner to help me brainstorm/plot/figure out what the hell I'm doing--- a canon divergence where Simon successfully exposes Baz as a vamp and Malcolm steps the fuck up as a father. Here's a bit of Simon POV:

It didn't matter anyway. Pitch Manor was empty. While [the Mage] ranted and raved, I wandered into Baz’s living room. The TV was still on. Peppa the Pig was playing. A half-dressed Barbie was splayed on the couch next to a small bowl of grapes, all cut in half. I picked up the doll and brushed her tangled hair out of her face.  Why didn’t I know Baz had a sister? A family that ate snacks together in front of the TV? Parents who loved him so dearly they fled their whole lives under cover of night? In the days that followed, I sat in meeting after meeting with the Coven, listening to The Mage. He demanded the casting of tracking spells, pushed through more dark creature reforms, and rambled about the miscarriage of justice and the dangers of harbouring monsters.  But Baz wasn’t a monster.  He was just a boy.  A scared boy.  A boy who ran because he wanted to live. 

Anyway...here's to accountability via tumblr. Maybe once I've slept for several weeks and feel more refreshed I won't be so frustrated by every word I know, or more precisely, all the beautiful ones I can’t seem to find…

Thanks for the tag @bookish-bogwitch. Cannot wait to devour the new chapter of BPD!

Hellos and high-fives to all. May your words (and art) be faring better than mine: @raenestee, @cutestkilla, @roomwithanopenfire, @facewithoutheart

@emeryhall, @artsyunderstudy, @aristocratic-otter, @larkral, @rimeswithpurple

@drowninginships, @valeffelees, @shrekgogurt, @blackberrysummerblog, @iamamythologicalcreature

@run-for-chamo-miles, @thehoneyedhufflepuff, @arthurkko, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe, @youarenevertooold

@beastmonstertitan, @supercutedinosaurs, @rbkzz, @fiend-for-culture, @theearlgreymage

@brilla-brilla-estrellita, @skeedelvee, @ic3-que3n, @talentpiper11, @ivelovedhimthroughworse

[w1r3z]

Revisited the muffins saga recently and thought of an idea for a rewrite that i haven’t seen done yet: what if Maud was a one of the bakers?

the idea is honestly so funny to me, considering how monotone she is, especially when compared to her sisters. Like, we have the energy-filled Pinkie, the grounded yet narcissistic Inkie, the brash and blunt Blinkie, the quiet, pessimistic, and unnerving Minkie...and then there's Maud. She's there. She likes comedy. And rocks.

I imagine she might have tolerated the rock farm just a bit more than her sisters. She still hated it, but since she isn't the type to show...well, any emotion, you would never really know. She'd probably be pretty close to Minkie; the both of them being the quietest of the group. She would also take a matriarchal role along with Inkie; as they are both the most level-headed. Going off of what we see in the show, she would be pretty chill with Apple Bloom, too.

then there's the whole turing ponies into pastries thing. she would participate, but while the rest of the bakers show their true insanity, Maud just stays monotone. She doesn't do much extra to torment anypony; her emotionless attitude usually does the trick anyway. she leads the baking the least out of the group, and mostly just helps out with whatever the other end up doing.

IDK, the idea of Maud being in the deranged world that is the muffins saga and turning ponies into cupcakes is a hilarious concept to me, and i'm surprised i haven't seen anyone talk about it yet

Basic summary: Muffins rewrite where almost everything is the same except Maud Pie is there.

[privatehousesanatomy]

hi this is a very controversial topic in the house md fandom i feel like and i'm going to speak on it. feel free to agree or disagree in the comments and reblogs, but truthfully i don't think anything you can say can or will change my view point.

that being said - house was never the "bad guy". is he a great guy? absolutely not. he's deeply flawed and i can understand why a lot of people hate him. it's hard to like somebody when all you're seeing is what's on the surface. he's cold, abrasive, mean, and an entire list of other words i could use to describe house but that's not the point of this post.

i can guarantee that there is not a single person on this planet that could go through even a quarter of the shit that house has gone through and still say that they're not miserable. you cannot expect someone to go through hell and not come out of it a changed person, and you cannot get upset with a person who's gone through hell and is bitter because of it.

let's start with his childhood. it's always been kinda up in the air just how abusive house's father was - the only real instances we were ever given detailing the abuse was ice baths, being made to sleep in the yard, and being given the silent treatment, which are all absolutely horrible things to do to child, however his childhood wasn't something that was ever touched on a whole lot. house even admits that there were good times, and a lot of people overlook that fact. a lot of y'all aren't willing to accept that people can have good memories of their abusers - that's how they become abusers in the first place. especially in terms of abusive relationships - there had to be good memories before the bad ones could be made. we don't know how john house was in terms of how he spoke about his son to other people. he could have described his son as his pride and joy to the general public but behind closed doors shamed house for not being more like him. having a tainted relationship with a parental figure is damaging and it's really no wonder why house grew up with such a skewed perspective on the concept of unconditional love.

chronic pain is a whole other issue. he was forced into a medical procedure against his will and regardless of whether or not it saved his life, it was still a direct violation of his bodily autonomy and to make it worse, the person that did it to him ending up abandoning him when he became too much of a burden. chronic pain is already hard enough to deal with. i deal with it myself and i completely understand why house gets the way he gets when he's in pain. to the rest of the world, they watch him function and think that the pain can't be that bad, and it's the same shit i experience in my own daily life. the pain is incredibly overstimulating at times and despite how good we might be at pretending that it's not, we're suffering inside.

another thing that doesn't help is how many people remind house on a daily basis how horrible he is and how they're worse off for knowing him. do you honestly expect him to start acting like everything is all sunshine and rainbows when people are practically telling him he's better off dead? that the world would be a better place if he wasn't in it? he is the way he is because everything in his life has proven to him that for some god forsaken reason, the universe is working against him and the only way for it to not hurt him is for him to become an isolated, antisocial individual. can't get hurt if you don't let anyone in, right?

while i'm here, i'm also going to touch on instances in the show that he gets blamed for. amber's death and chase getting stabbed were not his fault. everyone wants to sit here and blame him but there's no blame to put on him. with amber, he specifically called looking for wilson. he told amber to find wilson and send him. amber came anyway. it wasn't her fault either. it was no one's fault but the guy that drove into the bus. house risked his life to try and save amber's, and yeah she died but it wasn't his fault.

and with chase getting stabbed, that wasn't house's fault either. house might have taken the blame for it because if the blame has to be pinned on someone, might as well be him, right? but you can't blame him for either situation.

idk maybe im yapping too much and maybe none of this makes sense but it makes sense to me

[sophieinwonderland]

r/systemscringe user ponders the question of whether they would still hate endogenic systems if we stopped calling ourselves systems. It goes... predictably.

Before going on... let me just stop and say how sad I think it is that u/DustyArcade is befriending people to bait them into revealing personal details about themselves for Reddit Karma.

While it seems hopeful that they're more open-minded than some of the others on the general concept of plurality, this is a really gross behavior.

Spoiler: the answer to this question is yes!

But before we get into that...

PSA: Beware @/Cains-Coin-Shop

Now, I am going to get into the comments, but before I do, we need to take an intermission for a PSA regarding u/DustyArcade. When looking at their post history, I ran across this.

The blog has apparently been reinstated in the week since that post.

And they're apparently an anti-endo tulpamancer.

I remember running across this not too long ago, thinking about responding, but deciding not to. Though given that this user is baiting people into friendships to post to Reddit, WATCH OUT FOR THIS BLOG.

I don't know of this is their bait blog or just another blog they happen to run. But either way, they aren't a safe individual to interact with if you're concerned about being posted to r/systemscringe.

Now, back to our regularly-scheduled debunking...

"They're already saying they don't have DID/OSDD but they're still faking it" is some of the wildest reasoning I've ever seen.

Now, "used by" is a pretty interesting use of words. Because sure, there are plenty of DID/OSDD systems who use these terms. But remember that "plural" was created in the 90s as an alternative to the medicalized "multiple." Likewise, "collective" and similar terms were created to distance people from medicalized terms like "system."

It's pretty clear that u/NonamesNolies has no understanding of plural history, which does get pointed out by u/DustyArcade to their credit.

Pretty sure the equivalent term before "endogenic systems" was "natural multiple."

Normally at this point, I would point out to u/NonamesNolies that the ICD-11 acknowledges that you can have multiple distinct personality states without a disorder.

I would point out that the creators of the Theory of Structural Dissociation have said spiritual practices and hypnosis may be able to result in the creation of self-conscious dissociative parts of the personality.

I would point to the chapter in Transgender Mental Health, published by the APA, which stated that you can be plural without a disorder or trauma.

But I won't do that because I know for a fact they aren't willing to listen, and just prefer to call any psychiatrists who disagree with them grifters. And yes, that's an actual thing they did, which I will get to at the end of this post!

Meanwhile...

Really just... going straight for those cult accusations, huh?

Funny from the science-denier.

Anyway, it's amazing how completely wrong they are on the term "multiple."

Yes, originally, the term was shared. And it still is to an extent. But then as the endogenic/non-disordered community broke off, they coined and popularized "plural" as an alternative to avoid medical connotations.

Plural was NEVER a DID/OSDD-specific term. It was always inclusive to all systems from the beginning.

But there you have your answer. It's not about the terms we use. It's about our existence. The language we use doesn't really matter to them.

There is... a whole lot in this interaction that it's hard to know where to begin. For one thing, most tulpamancy is viewed as psychological. And I imagine that even most spiritual tulpamancers would dispute their practice being considered "religious."

But to u/doubtful_messenger's assertion that endogenic systems need a parasitic relationship with DID, I'm just going counter that endogenic plurality through various names has existed for a long, long time.

The explanation of some forms of plurality as a mental disorder is fairly recent, only arising in the past couple hundred years. Before that, any instance of plurality was viewed as spiritual. Endogenic systems don't need a DID community to exist.

The tulpamancy and daemonism communities, forming completely independently of the larger plural community, proves that.

Finally... there's u/DustyArcade saying they thought they were turning into an endo, which I think I'll just let speak for itself.

...

The final comment in this thread I want to mention is from u/Kamari-mari, who I feel perfectly encapsulates the anti-endo point of view.

"Nothing you say matters because we already made up our mind and won't read anything that contradicts our preconceived notions."

And shoutout to u/bugzxvi for their addition of congratulating u/Kamari-mari for bragging about not being able to read three short paragraphs. It really pulls the whole thing together.

...

Okay, now I referenced u/NonamesNolies calling psychiatrists grifters, so let's dive into that next!

r/Systemscringeing on Transgender Mental Health

Quick note: That's not a typo. r/systemscringing is a new hatesub like r/systemscringe, but exclusively for systems to make fun of other systems.

The relationship between transgender mental health and plurality, including DID, seems pretty obvious to me. How many systems have headmates with various genders? How many of those experience dysphoria while fronting? How does the gender of nonfronting headmates affect the fronters? How do these factors affect transitioning?

This stuff is super important for doctors to understand when treating plural patients.

And it's wild how u/NonameNolies just immediately jumps to hating a psychiatrist for acknowledging the existence of endogenic systems.

This gets even worse in the comments.

What is the logic supposed to be in this argument? "If you're not a trauma specialist, you aren't qualified to say that plurality can be caused without trauma?"

How does that track?

I mean, surely, not being a trauma specialist means there's a better chance you'll run into plurals who aren't traumatized than someone who exclusively works with trauma victims, right?

"You can't say things other than X can cause Y unless you're an expert in X" doesn't actually make any sense.

Imagine if you decided that to say "diseases other than cancer can kill you," you needed to be a cancer specialist.

That would be pretty silly, wouldn't it?

Can we just take a step back for a moment and imagine something for a moment...

You are Eric Yarbrough. You worked hard for 8 years to earn a doctorate in psychiatry.

You've served the LGBTQ community tirelessly in the psychiatry field since, serving as president of The Association of LGBTQ psychiatrists, among many other roles.

You've become a Distinguished Fellow of the American Psychiatric Association, one of the highest honors given by the APA.

And some rando on Reddit just called you a grifter and said you should be ashamed of yourself because they're upset you don't support their bigotry in a book that itself was reviewed and published by the American Psychiatric Association.

...

Anyone else just feel like anti-endos treat psychiatrists the way Trump treats judges?

[estiebestieban]

omg your tags were ABSOLUTELY PERFECT! you understood exactly what i was trying to say in my post and i truly appreciate that.

of course no one HAS to like esteban but whenever i see someone hate on him i just want to ask "why?". because pretty much 99% of the time their reasoning for hating on esteban is based off one of the narratives that has been thoroughly disproved, not just in my post (i don't think that highly of myself lmao) but in many testimonies over the years. i've even seen people say they don't really know anything about him and then just write paragraphs of lies to justify their dislike of someone they OPENLY ADMIT they could be wrong about! and if their whole basis for hating on a driver is based on a bunch of lies, then what's left once the falsehoods are deconstructed you know? (and if you're one of the 1% then go ahead - i can't stop you lmao!)

also i actually had written a line about how esteban's teammates, who have all been VERY TALENTED when it comes to getting the media on their side, have absolutely used this negative perception of esteban to boost themselves (i even had interview quotes from fernando and pierre at the ready and was trying to find some from checo) but i ended up removing it because i didn't want to be accused of using my post to hate on the aforementioned drivers. because of course my extensively researched and cited 1000+ word essay that i spent hours on and collaborated with multiple blogs was all written for a single line in which i "hate" on two drivers...

there are definitely times where i wish that esteban would play the media game and speak his truth (and i think he's actually testing the waters a bit with very reasonable statements). but that's not how he wants to approach things and i have so much respect for that. and considering all the team principals (including his very likely future team principal ayao komatsu) and other paddock members have vouched for him over the years, i think it was the right decision.

anyways sorry for another mini-essay in your ask box but i just wanted to say thanks again for your tags <3

You're so right for your post and you're always invited into my askbox for mini (or full length tbh) essays because you get it!!! (As do all other esteban stans I've seen on here cheers to like all five of us.

As a Dutch fan, the one question I get asked most is "Oh you must be a Max fan, right?" and when my answer is no, people go down the list of possible drivers I could be a fan of, but somehow they never say Esteban. When I say I'm an Alpine fan, the gut punch response is always "Oh, Fernando/Pierre, I get it."

While there is nothing wrong inherently wrong with assuming favourites, it's wild to me that even when I narrow it down to three possible drivers, Esteban still isn't even considered.

Even when I'm surrounded by major fans of the sport, the concept of Esteban having a genuine fan is foreign to people. I understand that most people around me view the sport through the lens of the Viaplay vision (and previously ZiggoSport) which favours Max to the extreme, and who couldn't give less fucks about other drivers. Esteban is hardly mentioned during broadcast, and when he is, it is always in a negative way (that's what happens when you take out the golden boy once I guess)

I've had this discussion time and time again, where I point out that Esteban drives in a similar style like Fernando - but where Fernando is praised for his balls and his attitude, Esteban is shoved aside as reckless and a danger. Where Max is hailed as the second coming of Christ, Esteban is deemed as a liability on track.

Why? Because he isn't considered charismatic enough? Even when he has countless fun and endearing interviews?

The media continues to cut Esteban out of the narrative wherever they can. An example would be people pushing the Pierre/Charles friendship for a dramatic tale of childhood friends turned competitors, but they leave out Esteban time and time again - like we don't have various images showing their closeness during their karting days.

Also, we forget way too often that Esteban and Max were rookies together in f3 in 2014 who both skipped f2 to go straight to f1. Only one of them won f3 that year, and it wasn't Max