#AND YALL ARE DELETING HIM
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iwantmygun · 2 years ago
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how did I miss this line my first watchthrough
I was like did he really just say that?!
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bixels · 5 months ago
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In case anyone's curious how I go about concepting character designs, this is how most of the higher-concept characters start out as.
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bunnyboy-juice · 4 months ago
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NO MORE ASSOCIATING THINGS WITH FEMMES ONLY BECAUSE THEY ARE PINK!HYPERFEM FEMMES ARE GREAT AND I LOVE YOU CAMPY FEMMES WHO EMBODY PINK BUT ALSO JESUS CHRIST CAN YOU GUYS NOT GO MORE THAN ONE DAY W/O TRYING TO SHOEHORN FEMMES INTO BEING ONLY PINK UWU BABIES. I AM FEMME AS IN GRASS AS IN DIRT AS IN TREE BARK AS IN WEEDS SPROUTING THROUGH THE SIDEWALK CEMENT. FEMME AS IN GENDER NONCONFORMITY AS IN FUCK YOU MY FEMININITY IS WHAT *I* SAY IT IS. FEMME AS IN DEPTH AND DARKNESS AND WARMTH AND TERROR. FEMME AS IN CAVES. FEMME AS IN LIGHTNING. FEMME AS IN AN AMALGAMATION OF TRAITS THAT I HAVE DECIDED ARE FEMININE REGARDLESS OF WHAT SOCIETY SAYS. FUCK IS IT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!???
#personal#i am emotional yes#over the years ive had this blog I've made a few posts abt being femme#nd whether they're serious or jokey..... inevitably someone in the tags goes “ohhh yeah bc pink”#or in the case of what inspired this post: someone going “what about the pink ones” on my praying mantis post#and im just.#sick of it. im sick of femme being equated to pink and frilly girlie behaviors.#im sick of femme being equated to skirts and heels. to makeup. to skincare. to pristine nails exactly almond shaped.#im sick of ppl acting like All femmes aspire to this shit. im sick of femms being reduced to this shit.#and i love pink! i love pink! my phone theme is quite literally just black and pink all over.#im just. so tired of any expression of Femme identity being shoehorned into being a Specific type of femininity#especially as someone who DOES get dysphoric wearing skirts. wearing dresses. embodying the femme aesthetic yall are so set on making#if u guys wanna rb this i truly dont care#i just needed to scream#and this is one small thing#but the 2nd largest category of anon hate i have gotten since making this blog is str8 up homophobia from other “queer” folks#saying i cant be femme bc of how i present. calling me slurs (and using them as such) bc they cant understand femme as anything but that#my wife and i have our users in our personal discord server set as 2 different things of anon hate ive gotten#i have had OTHER FEMMES tell me i am not femme. femmes who Know im femme who still call me butch. femmes who ive corrected and been blocked#-by bc of it. the number 1 largest demographic of queerfolk who have me blocked rn is TME femmes who embody pink also#and i dont think its a coincidence at all. (and i know this bc i go to try and follow these ppl bc they get rbed on my dash & i cant)#and ik their blogs arent deleted bc some of them don't block my wife (tall. white. butch) and it cant be politics cause her and i rb#a lot of the same political shit (fuck. i think she rbs More than i do even. this is genuinely mainly a nsft blog)#and usually i don't say anything but im having a bad day so i get to be angry about this and if anyone fucking tries me i will block u#idc if we've been mutuals 4ever. im judt so tired of feeling like i am not Enough as a femme bc i dont embody this shit#im sick of this lameass lip service to he/him gnc femmes etc when the thin white 50s housewife femme is still what is preferred and loved#im sick of this lamesss lip service when y'all feel entitled to theorizing on other femmes genders bc u cant conceptualize a femme who does#wanna be hypetfeminine. im sick of it. im sick of it. im sick of it.#celebrity bun
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pandeesall · 3 months ago
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daud wip i might never finish
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hello-sweetheart · 18 days ago
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You know that trope where Person A thinks Person B is just being nice but they’re actually flirting. What about the opposite? Person A misreading their behavior and being the only one falling impossibly in love.
Clumsy in Love part 4
Eddie rubs his hands over his face and presses the heels of his palm into his eyes.
Im such a piece of shit. God, how could I just do that.
He’s pissed at Steve for not saying something sooner, for waiting until Eddie had something good in his grasp. But he’s angry with himself too.
How stupid is he, really? Did he really not notice until it all came face to face?
He has Adiel’s number memorized, but he knows which of Steve’s beauty marks form constellations.
Mostly, hes confused. His feelings are a jumbled mess and he’s never been good at sorting them out. Naturally, he turns to music. Dio has serenaded him these past few days. Wayne has steered clear of his shit show.
How do you feel right now?
What do you see?
Where would you be right now?
Hey angel what about me?
Jesus fucking fuck. He attempts to run his hand through his hair only it doesn’t get too far, rings snagged in his tangled hair. He can feel the oil built up on the strands and knows it’s time to get his ass out of bed. He doesn’t.
“Angel, Angel, angel. You were my angel. Just not anymore.” He mutters to himself long after the track has finished and another song plays. He’s learning to let go still, even after he’s ended it.
You know what really makes him feel like a dickhead? That Adiel got hurt because of him. He didn’t deserve to get caught in Eddie’s bullshit.
Guilt eats him alive.
His conscious hurts and his heart trembles, tumbled in his chest, but he doesn’t feel the heartbreak the way he should. That world-on-fire and breath burning feeling. He can’t find it.
Like a masochist he wants for it, desires it, deserves it like sinner.
Those last few weeks were enough for his feelings to settle, for his heart to make a decision with or without his input. He tried—god fuck I tried—to feel that skipped-beat flutter when Adiel smiled his way. Could almost convince himself he could. That Adiel’s interlocked hand in his still felt an extension of himself instead of something foreign.
It used to feel like I belonged at his side. Why did it have to stop?
He’s wronged a friend who trusted him to keep his heart safe. A friend who had already been through so much. And Eddie added to that lifetime of hurt because he couldn’t figure it out himself.
Because he was too stupid to see and too stupid to know.
He thinks of Steve’s lips, like he has now for days. Weeks. His heart twists, rung out. That skipped-beat flutter that betrays him.
Fuck. Fuck, man.
He has to stop yanking at his hair like he can train himself out of feeling it.
Do your demons, do they ever let you go?
When you've tried, do they hide, deep inside
Is it someone that you know?
You're just a picture, you're an image caught in time
We're a lie, you and I.
“I’m so fucking sorry,” he tells no one because he needs to say it until he can forgive himself a little. Until he can make himself believe that Adiel will forgive him, in time.
“I’m so sorry,” this time says it to himself, covers his face with his hands and finally cries.
Against his fucking will he cries, can’t hold onto it anymore. Ugly retching sobs that can only come from mourning an almost.
Finally, after days of like solitude, Wayne creeps in un-intrusive as a shadow. His hand on his shoulder may be the only thing that keeps Eddie from disappearing.
“I could’ve loved him, Wayne. I could’ve—I did. I think I fucking loved him and I didn’t know until—until I didn’t anymore. And then—and then I just couldn’t again.”
I wish he got to know that. That even for a short time, I had loved him.
Wayne, ever a man of few words, sits with him and lets him have his silence.
———
It’s a little over a month after that that Steve pays him a visit.
He’s smart enough to show up when Wayne isn’t home, looking sheepish as he shuffles on his front step. At least he has the gall to look him in the eyes.
All this is because of you, he thinks. His dark under eyes, his pallid skin. The rage in his blood. The almost that he had.
“Why are you here?” He looks taken aback, almost shrinks in on himself.
“I… the boys said that you, well.” Steve rubs the back of his neck, his hair longer than when Eddie last saw it. It slips through Steve’s fingers. “You never came by again and I wanted to see you. To talk? Can we talk? Can’t… can’t I come in?”
Having Steve in his home, in his space, is dangerous.
Those eyes are deep, soften by tired shadows.
“No,” his swallow is audible and steels himself, “Why should I want you in my home, Steve?”
Steve stands there lips parted and hands clenches at the bottom of his sweatshirt, eyes shined over. Eddie takes the chance to step forward. Everything inside him is too much.
“Don’t you understand what you did? I was happy. And you, fuck, you ruined it! Steve! You!” He out of the door way now and Steve steps back, back, back.
Steve’s face is red in shame. Eddie’s in anger. His pointed finger jabbed at his chest, accusing.
“You couldn’t just let me be happy? Why? Why did you kiss me, Steve? Why then? Was it because you couldn’t stand that I finally had someone? Say something!”
Steves eyes overflow, “Yes! I could stand it because I love you, asshole! I thought, I don’t know—I thought you loved me, too. Okay? Me. We both felt it—tell me you felt it too, Eddie? It wasn’t just me, right?
“You were everywhere and everything. You’d smile at me and it was the sun. So close, always right there and it was like we were—we were teetering on the edge of something amazing. And I was so happy, Eddie. So happy that day ‘cuz I thought, it was just us, right? Me and you. Just us. Together.
“But then you saw him and your weren’t even listening to me. You didn’t hear a word I said, did you? You only had eyes for him. You left me there and I didn’t know what to do with myself ‘cuz suddenly all you’d talk about was him. Every day and every minute we were together. After thinking, after thinking you loved me too.
That I had you.
So yes! Okay? I kissed you because I was selfish and I needed to know. I needed to know if any of it was real. If there really was nothing there.”
Steve’s breathing hard by the end of, words a wavering wet string of rawn vulnerable pulled out of his chest. He’s looking at the floor, hair covering his eyes, and shoulders trembling as he hiccups.
Then, everything feels still. Calm inside. For the first time in ages, Eddie feels like he can take a deep breath and not fall apart. He closes his eyes for a second and just breathes. The fight escapes him with the last breath.
“You ruined me, Steve. You ruined me in a way that even I didn’t understand. I didn’t know, not until that night, about how you felt. And I’m sorry if it was my fault, if I did and said things to make you feel that way, okay? But I didn’t… I didn’t feel that way about you. Not then. Not when you kissed me.”
“And now? Eddie? Do you… could you feel that way for me, now?”
“If it weren’t for you,” he begins, “Adiel and I… we could’ve had something great. But then you—and I— I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I wondered so much on why you kissed me that night, replaying every moment together, to see what you saw. And ended up feeling… feeling what you felt.”
He takes the chance to move forward the last bit of space to reach to him, have him look him in the eyes. Both of them mirror images of despair.
“You ruined me, Stevie. Everything was different. It wasn’t perfect anymore, I couldn’t make it perfect again. And I couldn’t be who I had been with Adiel knowing that I couldn’t find in me what we had before. That maybe, this has the chance of being something amazing, too.
I stopped seeing you everyday, so I saw you in everything. I stopped speaking to you, and you became the voice inside my head. It was maddening.”
Eddie laughs and wipes away the tears from Steve’s eyes, they fall faster when he smiles a weak and small but real thing.
“Adiel and I, we fit together; we were good together. But despite that, I didn’t want him anymore. I didn’t know why, I think I still don’t, but… I don’t need to know. I just need feel it, Stevie. And I feel it. I want this. Me and you. You have throughly ruined me, for anybody else.”
This time the kiss is different. It’s shared elation, wet and salty on the tongue, and clumsy as they try to fit into each other. Disappear in one another.
“Are you still mad?”
Those brown eyes don’t resemble gems of green, but they’re filled with incredible warmth and Eddie sees home in them,
Sees a life with them,
It’s own kind of precious.
And he laughs.
“So much, Stevie. I’m mad and heartbroken and falling jn love and happy and so so sure of us. I think, I think I still need some time, I’m really fucked—no, no, shouldn’t cry anymore,” he says as Steve’s face scrunches and it’s so unbelievably cute if he wasn’t blaming himself for it all.
“I just want to make sure I do this right this time. And if I, if I invite you in… I won’t be able to.”
Steve rests his forehead against his, there is heat between them, “But I have you, right?”
“Yeah, took me a while to figure it out but… yeah. Yes. You have me, Steve. God, and I have you. And tomorrow, tomorrow you’re going to come over and pick me up at 6 in the evening so we can eat shitty pancakes at the diner.
And then we’ll figure this out together.”
Part 3 <💛 End, thank you for reading and for all the feedback!
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tagerrkix · 1 year ago
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ivanttakethis · 1 month ago
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So like………………. what was the point of Round 6?? 🤨
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grogumaximus · 2 months ago
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jadewritesficshere · 2 years ago
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Painting
Modern!Eddie Munson x Female!Reader
Contains: nudes, mutual masturbation, phone sex
18+ only
Eddie flopped face down onto his mattress with a sigh. After working all day, playing at the Hideout, and then hauling all of the bands' equipment, he was wiped. He wanted nothing more then to smoke and go to sleep. His phone pinged with a notification. A contact under the name "Loser" had messaged him, causing a split second of confusion before a lazy grin spread across his face when he realized it was you (he had forgotten he changed it when high). You had been unable to come see Corroded Coffin play tonight as you had made previous plans.
Loser: How did it go?? Good?? Bad??
Loser: Was that one chick who wants to be a groupie there??
Eddie: went ok. Y u jealous?
Loser: just curious lol
Eddie: sure. Wbu?
Loser: Good! Robin and Nancy came. We had a nice dinner. We did paintings! Robin's looks better then mine. Mine looks like shit 😔 now just taking a bath and relaxing.
Eddie: show me?
Loser: lol no???
Eddie: y not? I'm sure it good
Loser: you sure?
Eddie: yes
Loser: fine
Eddie doubted your painting looked bad. You always tore yourself down, even when you did amazing things. He always wanted to throttle you, but knew he would be a hypocrite if he did. Eddie rolled onto his back and looked at the ceiling. He would convince you one day that you were awesome, but until then he would just have to keep reminding you. His phone dinged with a new message from you. He opened it and saw a picture attached and-
Immediately dropped his phone. His heart picked up speed. His eyes widened and face flushed. Eddie dove for the phone as if it were a life preserver and he was drowning. He couldn't believe his eyes. He licked his lips and stared at his phone.
A picture from your neck down. Bubbles in the bath around you. Water was running down your collarbone towards your tits. Your nipples barely covered by the bubbles. One boob having no bubbles around it at all, but your hand flipping him off blocked him from seeing more. He was greedy. He wanted to see more, and had never imagined you would send him this to begin with. Eddie looked down at the tent that had formed in his boxers.
Loser: ask nicely next time 😤
Eddie groaned and his dick twitched. You had totally misunderstood him, he had wanted to see your painting- of course he was more then glad for this outcome. However, he couldn't quite unsee what you had sent, nor would he want to. Eddie reread your text. Next time means more than just this once. Means maybe he could see more. Means maybe he has a better shot with you then he thought. He already overthought things with you many times, and now his brain had just switched to overdrive.
A million thoughts ran through his head as his hand traveled south. He paused briefly," Oh fuck it." He grabbed his dick over his boxers, causing the outline to be very noticeable. He took a pic before sending it to you. He would have felt bad about not sending a message with it, but he would have sat there for ages trying to think of a response. And he couldn't find it in himself to care as he pressed lightly against his dick.
He dropped his phone on his stomach. All Eddie could think about was you as he pulled his dick out of his boxers. Your soap covered tits. How beautiful they looked.. He licked his hand before slowly grasping his dick and squeezing the base, causing the tip to flush more. The pressure causing him to moan. He slowly stroked up and down his length. He picked up the pace, canting his hips up to meet his hand. Part of him wanted to go slow, but the rest of him wanted to get this over with quick so he could do it again and again and again. His chest heaved and sweat started to form on his brow. A sigh fell from his lips that quickly turned to a moan at the thought of it being your hand wrapped around him. How small your hand would look on his dick. How-
His stomach tensed and he jolted as his phone started vibrating and your ringtone played. The vibrations on his lower stomach felt so good, he was tempted to let it keep playing, but the urge to hear your voice was stronger. With his free hand he grabbed the phone and answered. "H-hello?" Eddie asked, panting into the phone. "Oh fuck, Eddie," your voice higher than normal sounded like music to his ears. Eddie moaned and your response was a whimper. "Fuck babe, see what you do to me?" Eddie's voice felt like sandpaper, he was surprised he could even find words. "Uh-huh." The sound of water splashing caught Eddie's attention," holy shit. Are you touching yourself?" "Wish it were you."
Eddie's mind went fuzzy as he picked up speed. The schlick noise picking up, his mind filtering out everything except your moans. "Sound so good. Wish I was there." Eddie mumbled, feeling his tip leaking generously. He was so close. "Fuuuck Eddie I'm gonna-" your sentence was cut off with a moan and he lost it. His hips bucked without rhythm and cum spurted everywhere. He never understood the phrase of people seeing stars behind their eyes until now, but they were more like fireworks. He had never cum this much in his life, not even when he had first found porn.
He slowly came back down, a euphoric feeling enveloping him. A warmth spread in his chest as it heaved, trying to catch a breath. He looked down and saw his shirt covered with his release. Your chuckle pulled him back to earth. "Uh so that happened...so whatcha gonna do about it Munson?" He hummed," Think i should ask you for a date." "You should."
Eddie had the biggest grin when you finally got off the phone, date planned for Friday night. He looked down at your contact name before changing the s to a v. He was going to find that painting you did and make sure it hung over his bed, so he could remember this night forever.
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vicontheinternet · 5 months ago
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Maybe we do need to go back to the “are the curtains just blue” for adults and have them have a refresher cuz why is bridgerton twt saying that Francesca is jealous of polin and implying that her and John is a marriage of convenience. And that deep down she’s envious of polin and she craves the passionate love that her siblings have for herself deep down even if she’s satisfied in a safe marriage and I feel like that’s just projection not everyone wants passion and toxicity some people want simplicity especially when the envy in question was because her mother wasn’t treated her and John with the same respect as her siblings and their partner because violet has this idea that her children’s love life is supposed to match her and her late husband’s watch was filled with grand gestures and that’s just not francesa. Violet is treating them differently because they don’t follow her vision of what love is and francesa feels alienated and isolated
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cancerian-woman · 2 months ago
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Why do you think Hayley is at fault for the lack of development for Tyler and Bonnie?
I never said she was. I hate when some of you find my old posts and the point goes straight across y’all heads. I did say it’s unfair that the writers seemingly had no problem creating plotlines and showing them for a werewolf arc when it came to Hayley opposed to Tyler. It’s not like Michael Trevino wasn’t apart of the cast for 4 years by the time Phoebe Tonkin got her role. It’s not like Tyler and his family wasn’t an introduction to werewolves right? Get the picture?
I get it Hayley was intended to be Klaus baby mama. That was the plan and arc destined for her character and that isn’t an issue to me. The issue for me in relation to Bonnie is that again, Kat Graham was there for 4 going on 5 years by that point. Bonnie isn’t even seen in the same dynamics of desirability that Hayley (just like Elena and Caroline) received. Hayley got into the plot followed her selfish ass motives which is good for her. Then she got to have this great sex with another character that pushed her storyline further while lessening Tyler’s. Now, see Bonnie didn’t even lose her virginity by that point. Sex and relationships were far from her mind. Though Hayley comes in and immediately gets a hook up. Remember when Bonnie lost her virginity and she was in physical pain. Remember her other steamy sex scenes? Wait—but you know Hayley’s and her multiple relationships.
In short: none of it is Hayley’s fault per se as she doesn’t write the show lmfaooo. But I’m not going to pretend Phoebe Tonkin didn’t have some privilege (as other actors did) either.
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epiphainie · 4 months ago
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bbina · 1 month ago
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everyones posting rn it feels a bit... idk forced
wonbin blink seven times if you’re being held gunpoint
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simstoyourdismay · 7 months ago
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ezra during the met gala ❤️‍🔥🌹
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themissingnumbers · 26 days ago
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[just as a quick little starry update for those i have interacts going on with- im going to prioritize finishing the current part of Descent i have going before i put my next replies out!
i do apologize to the two of you that like Just answered my asks- we will get to it though!! i just dont wanna bury Green n Descent completely under four diff rp chains,, but i do have answers drafted up for almost everything- its just delayed cus i wanna add images too but i need to focus all in on the current thing im doing for descent ^^']
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lesbiancarat · 5 days ago
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every time jun has gone back to China for activities I become more and more done with XCSS (Pledis China)... it's so clear they're incompetent and don't understand how the Chinese entertainment industry works 🙃
#either that and/or theyre deliberately sabatoging jun#which like... i do abide by the whole 'dont attribute to malice what you could attribute to incompetence' thing#but also at this point its ridiculous...#a very summarized version is that in china its very common practice for companies to collaborate directly with official fanbases#so fanbases can organize events and provide promotion and support etc.#like its hard to explain but fanbases are more official organizations that are an important part of the entertainment industry#its basically a job for some people#but xcss/pledis has not been properly communicating with juns fanbases (jfortepiano and jun bar)#and its been causing a lot of issues#theyre also not following certain social media conventions for events apparently#all of which is hurting the promotion of juns acting activities#its also not a good look when every other actor has this fan support and jun either doesnt have any or has last minute stuff put together#bc the fanbases were not given proper notice/communication from the company#also im saying this as someone who has actually defended pledis (korea) for many things so like#yall know i wouldnt be complaining about this if it was just a small thing or there was some other explanation for it#the best explanation is that theyre incompetent and are treating c-ent like its k-ent when its not#but after all these years shouldnt they have learned by now and hired people who know what theyre doing??#might delete this but i needed to rant#its also frustrating when so called carats insult jun for doing solo activities and act like he thinks hes above svt#when hes not even getting proper support for his solo activities from the company 🙃#like no babes i promise this is not easier for him 😭#also i have to wonder what the xcss employees even do most of the time...#as far as i know they dont have any artists that promote solely in korea so jun and minghao should be their main priotities right???#but they seem to do jack shit whether chinaline is in korea or back in china to promote stuff#like not even the bare minimum half the time#ugh anyway#melia.txt
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