#AND I FUCKING KNEW SHE HAD MAGIC

[probably-a-human-being]

On a more important note, SHE LIVES

[b0nelessdoodles]

was feeling the sad beige mom in my soul tonight so had to doodle a her 'cause its a crime i don't draw more mystic flour tbh

also have my dumb message to my friend about it

[valkyurii]

it’s funny how things have gone full circle with malenia. she was so hated when the game first came out, but then people grew to like her. then the dlc came out and now people hate her again lmao

[luck-of-the-drawings]

THE ORDER OF PALMS An order of holy folk that serve The Helm, working to create powerful Aasimar Paladins for the purpose of protecting any who hire their help. [BACKSTORY UNDER CUT]

One day, Gjör and her peers were lead by their mentor Opheria, to a mission far from their home. On the peak of that mountain village, they saw upon the horizon, the castle of their home go up in flames. Horrified and scared, the apprentices sought to follow their mentors guidance, and followed her lead into a small barn. It was there, that Opheria proceeded to slaughter each and everyone of the apprentices. It seemed she somehow had a hand in this sudden attack on the Order of Palms. Gjör D'annevual survived a sword through the 'heart', on account of a rare condition, that places her heart on the other side of her chest. When she finally managed to bring herself back home, the Order was insulted by her survival. She had so many better peers, why couldn't any of them have survived? This runt was seriously the only thing that survived Opherias wrath? It was better to just wash their hands clean of this. Thus the Order decided to banish Gjör from their ranks. She now travels the land in search of a purpose.

[theeviltriplet-fromao3]

Dear Celestia,

Fuck you. I didn’t learn a god damned thing ‘cause I was fucking right bitch.

Sincerely,

Applejack

Quote: MLP Friendship is Magic s2 ep15

[gonzodangerfeels]

Me: no really if you missed even one birth control pill you better double check you aren't pregnant.

[batcavescolony]

I'm back talking about Harry Potter and Snape's worst memory because while I hate the author y'all bug me.

Snape worst memory isn't James bulling him or string him up in front of the school, (that was bad I'm not saying it wasn't) it was Lily ending her friendship with him because he called her a Mudblood. With evidence.

To prove my point we have to go read the Deathly Hallows when Snape gave Harry his memories! We get to see the scene again but this time the thing that sticks out the most is Snape calling Lily a Mudblood. Now if that's not enough proof the next memory goes like this.

*Outside Gryffindor Tower*

Snape: I'm sorry

Lily: I'm not interested

S: I'm sorry!

L: save your breath... I only came out here because Mary told me you were threatening to sleep here.

S: I was. I would have done. I never ment to call you a Mudblood it just-

L: Slipped out? It's too late. I've made excuses for you for years. None of my friends can understand why I even talk to you. You and your precious little Death Eater friends- you see, you don't even deny it! You don't even deny that's what you're all aiming to be! You can't wait to join You-Know-Who, can you? I can't pretend anymore. You've chosen your way, I've chosen mine.

S: No-listen, I didn't mean-

L:-to call me a Mudblood? But you call everyone of my birth Mudblood, Severus. Why should I be any different?

*Lily leaves. Memory ends*

The next memory is Snape becoming a turn coat for Dumbledore so he could keep Lily safe because Voldemort wouldn't spare her.

Snape has had worse experiences then a teenage James Potter being a bully (even if it was shitty). so we look at the rest of the memory and lo and behold what do we see? The actual worst moment of Snape life, the moment he lost Lily forever.

[simcardiac-arrested]

i showed my mom stp, thought shed get the damsel ! no !! she turned into the voice of the stubborn immediatly upon hearing that she must slay the princess. wanted the narrator to shut up, wanted to skip the path in the woods. didnt care about why/how she survived dying, why the path is changing, etc, only wanted to slay the princess. narrator's strongest soldier... !! got the eye of the needle and lured her out. no damsel only murder (also this was my first time seeing adversary/eye of the needle and shes SO SO SO COOLLL i love themmm my best friend the adversary!!!!!) thought youd find this fun ?! sparkle on its wednesday dont forget to slay the princess

THIS WAS YOUR FIRST TIME SEEING ADVERSARY/EON???? AHHGHGHHG gurglinf and crying. i kin ur morher i think. There is something about stp that makes you act in complete conviction whether that’s killing the princess or saving her

[approximately-32-leafcutter-ants]

"are you trying to tell me that the great chinese hegemon-king, Xiang Yu, of the western Chu, leader of the 18 kingdoms and ender of the Qin dynasty, great warrior of the Chu-Han contention, is trangender?" ~ me 20 minutes ago hearing a friend talk about their game

[scorpiusmalfoylovesoscarwilde]

day 16 of being back home from uni, I burst into tears in front of my mum by accident and her trying to comfort me was the most awkward experience of my life

[castelled-away]

Do you ever read a fic & then some random side characters that pop up again & again throughout the whole story do something together in the background while the main character is occupied with their own thoughts & just brushes over them like a fleeting, unimportant observation? And you’re like these two, I wanna ship these two. And then you keep your eyes open for more background interaction like those as a secondary goal besides reading & enjoying the fic (that’s when a fanfic really starts to live at least to me).

Though I’m all insecure & paranoid now bc the author surely didn’t mean to paint these two in a romantic light & just needed that side interaction as a description filler & im reading too much into this, but like…I ship it. Oops. How did that happen

Link is here: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1830772 (it’s actually Part 2 of a longer 5-Parter-Series & Part 1 was already awesome but it keeps. getting. better.)

[constantvariations]

V9C5

Got that post-workout bliss and a plate of pizza rolls, so I’m raring to go!

Post Ep: whoever decided the rusted knight “twist” should step on a lego every five minutes for the rest of their lives

Wait why is Ruby running? The last episode ended with the caterpillar being dropped through the floor by the cat, so are they running from the cat? Was the growth yogurt ready, and if so did they grab it ($50 on no)

“I’m so glad the four of you are still the four of you.” Is this excluding Little because they didn’t get hit with the Character Arc tm dust? (Now that I think about it, why didn’t Little have a vision? Did we just not see it or are they immune somehow?)

“You’re the one who ditched us in the first place” okay, Weiss, firstly Ruby stopped following the cat so that’s mostly on her. Secondly, why are you being antagonistic to the one creature you can’t afford to offend because it’s the one creature who can get you to the tree?

“...someone return to the Ever After.” How can you return to a place you’re already in? Is there a reprogramming center or something? If you veer too far off from your role you get reset? Reminds me of the re-educators of the Dragon Age Qun

They’re really laying on thick the whole “Everything is what it isn’t, and what it is, it wouldn’t be” (shout out to that one Shinedown song from the live action Alice in Wonderland)

All this talk of what happened to the caterpillar just sounds like a shitty mishmash of the Ship of Theseus, Schrodinger’s cat, and a reset button

So the Red King underwent the Ever Again program (I’m just gonna call it that, roll with it) and came out a kid? Was that by design or does everyone basically get reborn? Does that mean the racoon hasn’t been Agained since Alyx?

Oh they call it Ascension? How Devil May Cry of you. Also I ain’t calling it that. I like my Agained verbage

“Nose hair from a leprechaun.” I am half expecting a Rocket Racoon bit here

Straight up ditching someone you know is acting off because ~ew nose hair~ is... something else. And there goes Blake trailing after Yang’s coattails again because we! need! that! bee! bait!

This cat is far too lenient with these assholes. They just straight up jumped on his head without asking because who needs to respect people’s autonomy amiright fellas?

Goddammit bring the cat back right now I can’t stand Little’s voice and cOmEdY

Okay all the lights going out one by one is hella creepy gg

“I thought this was lost forEVER” why does Ruby sound like a highschool girl complaining about drama this deadass made me burst out laughing Also, is that the same sword from the Red Kingdom or a different one?

Okay the android is cool as shit I will admit that. The chain as hair is absolutely fantastic

Was that Summer in the axe blade? An axe is not what I would have expected of a Ruby clone. Those are hard-hitting and slow, usually used by the tanks, while Summer and Ruby’s figures suggest more agile approaches. If it were more of a hatchet size, I could see that, especially as a dual-wield

Pocket dimension blacksmith shop? Sign me the fuck up please

I think I’m going to strangle Weiss. You literally just saw her standing in the middle of the road, staring at and talking to nobody, and you fucking whine? I hope someone stabs her with her own tiara jfc

“It contains a mother’s promise” BITCH WHEN WAS THIS ESTABLISHED AND WHY WAS THAT THE FIRST THING YOU THOUGHT OF TO GIVE AWAY I’M GONNA BURN A FIRE HYDRANT

“We do not ascend” oh you mean die? That thing you said didn’t happen here? Dying? Was there even a second reading of the script or did yall just smoke with the originals?

Yes Ruby go right past the hostile creature instead of literally any other direction. Yall deserve whatever hell you make

Why is Ruby carrying everyone constantly? Their legs aint broke girl. Go be a distraction while they go for the yogurt goddamn

The giant jackrabbit’s cool ngl

Like how one scoop only grew them to doll sized but whatever was left after it was splattered grew them all to the right size

The jackrabbit’s name is Juniper. Both cute and cringe

GODDAMMIT IT HAD TO BE JAUNE

WHY

HE FELL LAST

THAT SHOULDVE BEEN YANG

FUCK YOU CRWBY

[stinkbeck]

oi i’m pissed 2 high heaven

[crumboat]

Whyyyyyy is it so earlyyy

[attractthecrows]

As much fun as Revallen and all his layers are to explore. there is something really nice about Laure and her lifetime of "Sure, Fine, Fuck Me I Guess" and "I will NOT be THWARTED!!"

like, it could have been fine. It could have! She could have grown up as an Amell of Kirkwall and stayed with her family. Probably wound up betrothed to some other noble loser. It could have worked. I'm gonna ramble so here's a cut.

It might have worked, but she was born in Kirkwall, and the spirits noticed her early. She had weird dreams, she'd hear voices sometimes... it was enough to spook her father. But she was so little that he told himself he was wrong... until one stormy night, when she called for help, and he walked into her bedroom and saw lightning sparking up and down his terrified daughter's arms in time with the thunder outside. And he turned around and locked the door behind him as he left her alone in her fear.

The next people that opened that door were the Gallows templars. And off she was dragged, her mother crying but doing nothing to stop it, her father staring at her with disgust in his eyes, to the Kirkwall Circle.

The Kirkwall Circle was, at this point, grossly overcrowded. They were already in the process of finding Circles willing to take excess apprentices; there was simply no room in the apprentices' dormitory for another little girl. So, as a temporary measure, she was paired with any free Enchanter. She rotated through several - but Orsino was her favorite, and the only one who could get her to talk. He was the one who learned her name - Laurel Amell. He taught her about spirits, and anything he could think of - which wound up being quite an eclectic jumble.

But eventually the Knight-Commander found a place for her in Kinloch, and sent two templars to take her there. They were not happy about this assignment. They didn't let her gather any belongings or say goodbye. They were mean and rough and impatient on the road, grossly unsuited for being in charge of a child. In a fit of frustration at the tangles, one of them hacked off her long hair. Etc. By the time they arrived at Kinloch, she was mute once again.

These templars also did not bother to learn her name. Essentially they shoved her toward Knight-Commander Greagoir and handed over the paperwork and fucked off to the barracks. So Greagoir gets to take her to Irving, who had been instructing a class.

They're trying to do introductions with a very shy and mute little girl. The paperwork only lists "Amell, L." The templars that brought her here don't know anything else nor do they care. Jowan and Surana barrel out of the adjacent classroom, fighting over a lyrium potion they just made that they want to show off to Irving and thoroughly interrupting. Jowan wrenches it out of Surana's grip. Surana trips him. The potion goes flying. The boys topple into Irving. Laurel tries to dodge and trips over Greagoir. The glass bottle full of lyrium potion smashes over her head, badly cutting her scalp and knocking her out cold. Irving and Greagoir still do not know her name.

But now they have more important things to worry about. Like whether or not this child is going to die of lyrium poisoning. So they whisk her off to the infirmary where Wynne (and Anders, learning the basics of healing) works on healing her. Jowan feels horribly responsible for what happened, so he's been hovering. Surana, not so much.

And they still don't know her name.

Wynne finds a written label on the inside of the girl's dress, but it's blurred and bleached from the lyrium. She hands it over to Anders, whose eyes are much younger, and he manages to read "L??RE?", which he pronounces as "Lore". That's all they can deduce: "Lore" Amell. It works for the infirmary; she's not even conscious. They can ask her more later, provided she lives.

And she does, obviously. She wakes a week later.

Wynne very carefully removes the bandage on her head, which is how Laure discovers that her hair has been bleached a brilliant shining white. During the examination, Wynne's just talking, to try to put the girl at ease. Where they are, what Wynne's been doing to help her, where the wound came from, where she'll be bunking, and here's the release papers please sign them, Jowan will take you to Irving, and please don't be afraid - she knows it's scary and strange, especially waking up in the infirmary after that introduction, but the enchanters only want to help and the templars are patient and fair. And by the way, they couldn't find her name in the paperwork, so please don't be offended if it's wrong, they can correct it later. And Jowan here has volunteered to help you get settled in...

Laure decides that the new name suits her fine. Laurel Amell is gone; she died the night that Daddy locked the door.

So Jowan takes Laure to Irving, apologizing all the while. Groveling, even. Begging forgiveness. etc. They get to Irving's office, and he has Jowan stand aside while he and Laure talk.

Irving asks her name. She tells him it's Laure. He asks if she's had any instruction. She tells him No, the Gallows were too crowded for her to attend classes, she had private studies with (list of enchanters, including Orsino). And at the mention of more and more high-ranking enchanters, Jowan is getting more and more stonefaced. just Kubrick staring at this kid he nearly killed. Beginning of the inferiority complex of all time.

and Irving laughs. He assigns her to basic apprentice lessons with plans to mentor her himself once the basics are covered.

And that's all that goes down BEFORE Origins.

[shidoukanae]

i love reading the official translations of TME because there gets to be so much additional context and nuance added that i couldn't pick up in a rough translation and it absolutely still bamboozles me how deep this story continues to go

like what do you mean there's now an insinuation Lyla was forced to call "Lyla" into this world? What do you mean Daniel implies there's still another facet of Lyla's past that's been completely unexplored? Does Lyla know about "The Voice"? Does she know something about Helene that forced her to summon The Voice in order to protect Helene? Who let Lyla know this information? Did she hear "Lyla's" voice too and decide it was necessary to bring her to this world?

Hell, I thought Lyla magic overloaded because she got so overwhelmed by the grief of her personal realization Helene, the last person she has left, turned against her. But nope! The implication is that Lyla purposely magic overloaded herself for unknown reasons, probably aware of the fact her soul would switch with someone more capable of protecting Helene, I'm presuming?

Which if so,,, oh,,, oh no,,,,

Why do i get the feeling that knowing that information is going to be the only thing that stops Helene from hurting "Lyla" once she realizes "Lyla" isn't her real sister? The angst potential,,,, god,,,,,,,, i LOVE this story so freaking much