#8th Grader

[sizzlyybacon]

trey's backpack part 1

we were in band class with a substitute who didn't speak much english, because of this she didn't take attendance. a ton of kids sat where they weren't supposed to, including my friend elise who pulled up in the percussion section to the right to me. my other friend soi was to the left of me. my friend euan was in front of me. we were chilling when suddenly we noticed a backpack with a tutta bella hat attached to it. we left it alone at first and continued talking. the sub got angry and said in broken english "me cut you up if you keep speak. you go to corners." (i'll split you all up if you keep talking and you'll all go to different corners of the room.) i sat up straight, "my greatest apologies, fine madam. we shall be good children from now on. thank you for being such an attentive and responsible teacher." i said, earning a laugh from everybody. after she walks away we can't control the impulsive thoughts and we bolt to the backpack dragging it over to our seats. we open it and read the laptop. (every laptop has a name tag on it) to find out who it belongs to. it's one of the percussionists from the other band, travis, who goes by trey. i was the only one who recognized the name. this was because me and my friend miracle saw him on the halloween dance. we were going up to people screaming at them to rate her nails. (pieces of tape stuck onto her nails, her costume was a basic white girl, she had an oversized tee, shorts so short you couldn't see them, a hydro flask, lip gloss, and way too much mascara which we helped her to apply.) trey was one of the kids we went up to. we found him accidentally because we found a giant tootsie roll on the ground that we started running towards, and he slid in and grabbed it first. she grabbed him by the shirt and screamed at him to rate her nails. he shrieked and started running. after chasing him down he started fake crying and handed over the tootsie roll to us, but that wasn't what we were asking for. he gave up and said "they're ugly, 0/10!" she SCREAMED and grabbed him. after screaming in his face for a solid minute she let him go. (back to the real story now) i laughed and we looked through the other stuff. it was relatively normal (except for the fact that the entire backpack was sticky and smelled terrible..), a mychron stopwatch, a clipboard that opened up to store other papers that we'd look at later, his laptop, his laptop case, full of trash, and 5 decks of disney villain cards, not gonna question that. but then we stumbled upon the last thing. a FLASK. like the ALCOHOL FLASKS. we opened it and it smelled like wine. the flask was completely covered in this weird clear sticky goo. that was all over our hands now. eughhhhh. it was only 1/4 full meaning either that was the reason behind the sticky stinky backpack or he had chugged 3/4 of it. either way its a yikes. we went through his weird clipboard storage thing to find a paper with his grades printed on it. all ies. (an ie is the same as an f in my school) the rest were music sheets and pieces of paper with weird scribbles and dicks drawn all over them. i'm not gonna judge you man. the teacher comes up and asks us what we're doing. i tell her the backpack belongs to my "brother" and he asked me to get something from it for him. it backfired on her for not doing attendance because she couldn't see that me and trey's last names aren't the same, then, elise suddenly says "imagine he comes in and sees us with his backpack." and of course, the door bursts open. our band teacher mr. van bebber is back from the field trip with the rest of the intermediate band. with trey RIGHT behind him. he looked at us since we're right across from the door but thankfully not at the bag. elise shoves everything back in and tosses the bag without closing it to the side and runs back to the french horn section ditching me and soi. soi runs the bag back to the corner to its original pose. she dips and runs to the timpani. i can't mess with it anymore because trey is too close.

[words-from-school]

"Do you think Australian spiders carry firearms?"

[lyrichi]

solomon: enough about me. when were you born?

mc: ....guess

solomon: 2011

[mc gags]

[ewwww-what]

Are we all consciously pretending to forget that Gilear canonically said this to his 13 year old daughter, or did you guys all actually forget about it?

[gremlingirlsmell]

guys its so funny to make fun of people with anxiety right hahaa look this random person on the internet that said something shitty, wouldnt it be super funny if they had social anxiety HAHAAAA

[biruesque]

surely, you're my destiny!

[shellsweet]

Despite everything. It's still you. 💛

[fandomsandfeminism]

I will say, one thing I LOVE about teaching middle schoolers these days is that with the internet, you never have any idea what information kids already know or how that information has been processed in their brain.

So like, our textbook includes some stuff about the space program, including Ronald Reagans speech after the Challenger Shuttle disaster.

And one of my students goes "who was president when this happened?"

Me: "Ronald Reagan."

Student: "....wasnt he the homophobic one?"

Me 😶"...........you're probably thinking of how he mishandled the AIDs crisis in the 80s. Yes, that was him."

Student: "....bet, miss. Magic Johnson has AIDS."

[chexingtonmixalot]

Looking at karna through the lense of seeing her as an 8th grader is so good and funny because who better to be a spymaster, than an 8th grader. 8th graders are the sneakiest, two faced, little liars ever. They know everything and they will hold it against you. It’s literally perfect

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

I UM-

(gently places this in your hands and runs away)

they are.... they are omn an date....

[thoodleoo]

my study hall students are making a bible tierlist. i can't make this shit up

[liquidstar]

garfiel age reveal is genuinely one of the funniest moments in rezero. subaru realizes that not only has he been beefing with an 8th grader, but the 8th grader has been kicking his and all his friends asses

[books-apples-socks]

daddy i love him is a spectrum at which james flint occupies both ends, send post

[stretchyyonko]

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE IN 8TH GRADE 😭

[bowenoke]

the real tragedy of being 14 on the internet is that the first fanart and first fanfic you ever made ARE out there and ARE accessible to you, but that they're attached to the least cool version of yourself. i have access to baby's first princess tutu fanfic and gravity falls fanart and while they may not have been GOOD i do still love them. unfortunately i was also malding about romney losing the election