#...especially the megamind one
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DUDE EVERY TIME I THINK ABT 457 I FEEL SICKKKKK.
#im not even getting queerbaited. im different#lol ik it will not be anything canon but its a dynamic that makes me soooo insane#heh…. you remind me of myself before i lost all hope… allow me to break ur spirit.. 😏 (falls in love by accidnet)#someone animated them over the megamind breakup scene im insane. im insane#we popping the biggest bottles when 457 is canon later this yr#not denying the fujo allegations SORRY but oh my gawdd#whwn the characwtrs are parallels!!!!!!!!#i hate to think too much abt possibilities and get my hopes wrong but oughhhh#i do stand by the idea that in ho sees part of himself in gi hun. like before whatever happened to make him be the frontman#gi hun is in a super interesting place where he had nothing left rlly even BEFORE the second games#the first games broke him so much he cant go back ro living his life#ik ppl meme on him learning nothing from s1 but i think he rlly just.. threw himself in without thinking too much#he didnt even anticipate that they might have changed the format of the games in 3 yrs#ESPECIALLY with a returning player 😭😭#i think he hoped that if he cld somehow Defeat the games themselves he wld get closure or smth. but its so unrealistic#thats like. the whole point lol in ho takes the piss out of him in the end like ‘lol did u have fun playing the hero??’#um. anyways i do think in ho maybe relates to him in a way.#tskkkk. whatever. i dont even care abt them#i will say. if any one of the current main cast dies in s3….. its over. for WVEYONE#MILLIONS MUST LIVE
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So I’ve always headcannon that the reason why Metro Man faked his death is that… his powers are actually slowly destroying him. As if the more he continues to use them, the further the degradation spreads until eventually he (literally) burns out.
When the more powerful man in the universe confronts his own mortality for the first time in his life, he obviously does not react very well. Faking his death seemed like a good (irrational) idea at the time and gets him out of the super hero work without having to tell anyone the truth.
(girl with adhd voice) yeah i just love in fiction when a character has a superpower thats also a disability. like a power that changes how they interact with the world in exciting ways but also has terrible drawbacks to their daily life. no real reason why
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The Lost Condom
Synopsis: You were in the middle of a spicy time with your boyfriend, when something odd happened: the condom disappeared. Inside. Of. You.
The solution? Go to the hospital.
The problem? Your family didn't know about your relationship.
Pairing: Jon Kent X Gn!AFAB!Reader; Platonic!Batfam
Tw: 18+; Only mention and slight description of genitals and sex, but nothing too explicit; All characters are aged up of course; English isn't my 1st language.
Word count: 1,8k.
Requested? Nah.
Extra notes: This isn't an original idea of mine, it's based on a real life story someone told me. Also the family finding out scene was inspired by this fanfic from @dccomicsimagines and this scene from Megamind. Also, eventually I will work on the asks waiting for me I swear 😭
General masterlist
So… You were in the middle of… Having fun… With your boyfriend… When suddenly, he said something that really confused you.
— Hmm… Babe… Where’s the condom? — Your head snapped back to look at him, since you were on all fours.
— Where's the ‘what’? — Your eyes were wide, unconsciously. Jon was blushing intensely, looking from your eyes to your entrance. He didn't know how to explain.
— I-I-I put it inside with the condom on, but now it's… Gone! — You narrowed your eyes. You watched him wrap and then enter you, you didn't feel him pull out at any moment, and even if he did, why would he tell you that he pulled out, took the condom off and then put it inside again secretly while you were still going at it?
You were both silent for a few seconds.
— Search for it! — You practically yelled at him, making him scramble to get off of you. You laid with your back down and legs open, looking at the ceiling, trying to calm down and not feel embarrassed. You felt him entering you with his fingers and searching around for minutes, grumbling and getting frustrated. The sensation was good… But you had bigger priorities at hand!
You huffed and changed positions a few times. A pillow underneath your butt, legs up, on all fours. Nothing worked. You even searched around the room and the bed, just to be sure. At some point, you both defeatedly decided it was best you go to the hospital.
The thing is, your relationship was still new, and no one in your family was aware. Lois and Clark already knew and approved, and you thought Cass suspected you were seeing someone, but you hadn't told them yet.
Especially Damian.
You and Jon knew each other years before Damian was even part of the family, since Bruce raised you since your birth — you were the product of one of his affairs, your biological mother didn't want to raise you, but she also didn't want to abort, so she and Bruce agreed that he would have you as soon as you were born — and he's best friend was Clark. Although, you didn't see each other much back then. It was after the Supersons became a team and besties that he started frequenting the manor more. You always had a childhood crush on each other — Jon thought you were beautiful and nice, and you thought he was cute and sweet, very different from the gross and rude boys from your school. —. Until you were each other's first kiss, then years later, first relationship, and first time. Of course, all in secret from Damian. The older family members only knew about your crush because of your physical language, but since you grew older and learned to hide, they assumed it was just a childish crush from the past.
Lois and Clark knew and approved, but they also always reminded you that you needed to tell Bruce soon, or at least Alfred, especially after you started being sexually active.
Unfortunately, the day came. Yes, you and Jon were old enough to have sex, but too young to be mature and brave enough to go to the hospital by yourselves. Lois was in another country for work, Clark was in the Watchtower in a League meeting, your dad was there too. Leaving the 2nd best option: Alfred — the best would be Lois, then Alfred, Clark, Cass, and then you would have to discuss which one of your other family members would it be.
Since you were in Metropolis — again, no one knew. More privacy wink wink —, Jon flew you back to Gotham, and you both almost cheered when you realized you were completely home alone, except for Alfred, of course.
Poor Alfred knew something was up when you suddenly were back from your “shopping trip”, with messy hair and clothes, red face and Superboy looking almost sick. He released a long sigh.
— Mx/Miss/Master (Y/N). Young Mr. Kent… — You cleared your throat.
— Alfred… We need help…
After you explained everything, Alfred looked ten years older. He didn't comment on anything, but his face showed how unimpressed he was. He just gestured for you to follow him to the garage, took the keys and started driving.
— Let me warn Master Bruce while we are-
— NO! — You yelled, started. He looked at you through the rearview mirror disapprovingly.
— Should I remind you that he will see the hospital bill and go after the truth? — You bit your lip.
— No, I know that. Just… Can't we pay on cash? — You smiled at him hopefully and nervously, but it was more like a grimace. Alfred was silent. You groaned. — I will tell him okay! Tonight! — Jon’s eyes snapped to yours, wide. — Relax! You're not gonna die!
— Yeah, until Damian whips out a kryptonite sword… — He groaned, hiding his burning face in your neck. You huffed, now wasn't time for him to be adorable.
— He doesn't have a kryptonite sword. Dad didn't let him do it. He would have to build it first. That would give him enough time to calm down. — Jon looked at you, indignant. Alfred cleared his throat.
— While we're there, I can't make any promises that if your father asks, I will hide the truth. He will know. — You and your boyfriend groaned, rubbing your faces with your hands.
— Yes, Alfred, I know…
Two hours later, you were finally laid down in position for the doctor to begin the procedure. Since if wasn't anything serious, you were on the emergency and there was only a curtain separating you from the rest of the patients outside. Alfred was sitting just outside, waiting, while Jon was standing by your side, holding your hand, as if you were about to give birth. The doctor was amused by your story, and her jokes helped you calm down.
She searched around you for a few minutes, the instrument she was using inside you being a little uncomfortable. Jon was silently horrified when he saw, you were startled too, but maintained the composure.
— AHA! Found it! It was really deep inside, almost on your cervix! — When she pulled out the condom, you both let out a breath of relief you didn't know you were holding.
You quickly put your clothes on again, you and Jon chatting as everything seemed lighter, and then left.
What you didn't know was that when Bruce got home and you and Alfred weren't there, it made him call, finding out just that you were in the hospital. Alfred refused to say much more than reassure him that it wasn't urgent and that he would soon know, thus he didn't have to crazily drive all the way there. That didn't stop him from alerting all your siblings.
When you got home, your whole family was there.
— Jon?! What're you doing here? — Alfred kept a straight face. Wow, he really wasn't going to help.
— Hmmm... — Jon subtly and subconsciously hid behind you. You shifted from one foot to another. Damian got up with a threatening scowl. You just came from the hospital. With a kryptonian.
— Kent! If you hurt my sibling I will-
— I didn't! — Jon almost yelled, then covered his face with his hands.
— Then, what is happenning here? — Bruce got up with a raised brow, analyzing the situation.
You thought for a moment. You either told them now and made things easier, or you spent all the way to dinner with them bothering you to tell. You could take it, Jon couldn't.
You took a deep breath.
— JonandIwerehavingsexwhenthecondomdisappearedinsideofmewecouldn'tfinditanywheresoweaskedAlfredforhelpandwenttothehospital.
They blinked.
— … What?
You huffed.
— Jon and I were having sex, when the condom disappeared inside of me. We couldn't find it anywhere, so we asked Alfred for help and went to the hospital. — You said, slower this time, although uma lower, more abashed tone.
Silence.
— … But… It was stuck inside? Weren't you wet, though…? — Tim's analysis broke the silence.
— SEX?! — Dick and Jason exclaimed.
— YOU WERE HAVING SEX WITH MY SIBLING?!
— Knew it. — Cass smiled and nodded, proud of herself.
Bruce heaved a sigh and sat down again.
— I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THIS! — Damian threw Tim's coffee mug in your direction and Jon zoomed in front of you. The mug broke. Jon had a sheepish expression.
— Tim, go grab kryptonite. — Jason ordered and got up, walking toward the hidden compartment in the shelf where he kept his guns. Dick held him back while Damian threw a flower vase at Jon.
— No! Don't do that, Tim. — Dick ordered back. Tim shook his head.
— I wasn't going to anyway… — He mumbled. Damian threw the center table.
— YOU ACTED BEHIND MY BACK! YOU TRAITOR! YOU- OUCH! PENNYWORTH STOP! — Alfred tutted, pinching his ear.
— I'm sure civilized conversations don't involve breaking the forniture. — Alfred shot a pointed look at Bruce. — Master Bruce! Say something! — Your dad just kept gazing at you and your boyfriend.
Cass sighed, stepping toward Bruce and sitting beside him.
— (Y/N)’s happy. He’s good. They're careful. — Bruce nodded, finally showing some reaction and looking pleased. Jason stopped struggling against Dick and looked at you.
— I don't care. I'm going to kill him. — Damian growled, starting to pace around the room in anger. Jon silently sighed in relief that Damian kept his distance by being on the other side of the room, the couch and the whole family serving as a barrier. You stepped forward.
— It's not casual. We've been together for almost two months now. — Everyone but Alfred and Cass gasped. Damian burned holes in Jon’s head with his eyes and your dad looked at you, masking his mix of emotions.
Cass tsk.
— So clueless. Many signs. — She shook her head.
— (Y/N), why didn't you tell us before? — Dick asked carefully, walking in your direction and stopping in front of you. Jon fiddled behind you. You shrugged.
— Didn't want to deal with you all while we were just starting things. Especially if it didn't work out.
— When were you planning to tell us? — You pouted.
— I don't know… In a month or two? You guys probably would find out by yourselves. — You shrugged.
— You've been sneaking out a lot… — Tim spoke up for the second time, catching everyone’s attention. He was fiddling with his laptop, likely doing his own investigation. The ones closest to Tim looked from the monitor to you again.
— When did you go to Metropolis?! — Jason exclaimed, indignantly.
— Hehe…
Damian growled.
— So that's why you've been ditching me?! — Damian pointed a finger at Jon, who scratched the back of his head.
— Surprise...? — Jon weakly sang the word.
Bruce cleared his throat.
— So that's why Clark’s been acting like he was happy he knew something I didn't… — He got up and pointed at you. — No more sneaking out. Ask permission before going anywhere. — You opened your mouth to protest, but he stopped you. — Either that or you're grounded. — You pursed your lips and nodded in defeat. — Now we will talk about birth control…
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DC Taglist:
@wandalfnation @vadersassistant @h0rr0r-10ver-69 @hxsun4 @silverklaus @toast-on-dandelioms @bluewillbon
#jon kent x reader#batfamily x reader#batfam x batsis#batsis!reader#batbro!reader#batfam x batbro#batfam x batsibling#batsibling!reader#superboy x reader#superboy#superboy jon kent#platonic batfamily#platonic batfam#supersons#platonic damijon#damijon#good dad bruce wayne#jason todd#dick grayson#batfamily#batfam#batfam x reader#tim drake#damian wayne#alfred pennyworth#cassandra cain#jon kent#dc comics#batman#masterlist
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🔞 Ray x GN!Reader, because I have been neglecting my man. sorry sweetie 🔞
“You’re being a terrible kidnapper by the way.”
Ray tilts his head idly, a sardonic smiles tilting the left corner of his lips at your words. His smirk is playful and dangerous. Knowing.
You lift your chin in mocking defiance from the couch where he’d placed you. It’s probably not as intimidating as you’d hoped considering the ropes binding your arms behind your back. Your legs are free, but it’s not like you could go anywhere. Even if you could somehow manage to escape Ray, his lair (“Please don’t call it that, Star.”) was located on the topmost floor of the tallest apartment building for miles around.
He leans against the glass window-walls that look down onto an ocean of shimmering city lights. Flashes of purples, reds, and gold are blanketed by a moonlit black velvet. The colours reflect off the edges of his face, sharpening gorgeous features and softening others. A cigarette dangles loosely from between long fingers, trailing an almost invisible thread of smoke up to his lips.
Lips that are now stretched in the most self-satisfied smirk you've ever seen.
“You’re staring, Star,” Ray taunts. You snap your head to the side, cursing mentally. You’re hyper-aware of Ray’s tall form as he moves closer, not stopping until he’s standing over your seated form. His free hand reaches up to caress your jaw, knuckles brushing the apples of your cheek. The cigarette is gone, but the scent clings to his skin – somehow warm and enticing – and you can’t quite stifle the urge to lean into his touch.
Fingertips trace your skin, rough pads mapping every spot he had claimed and memorized countless times before.
"Explain yourself," he murmurs, tilting your head up so you’re forced to meet those unfathomably dark eyes. "How am I a bad kidnapper, Star?"
You open your mouth to reply, nothing coming to mind for several seconds. It's as if his gaze is a black hole sapping you of your usual sass and wit. "Um, w-well...well what do you think you should do with me?"
Ray kneels in front of you, which does nothing to make you feel any more in control of this situation. Body still tightly bound, you can do nothing other than pout and writhe in place when he leans closer, lips brushing against your heated cheek.
"Oh, that's an easy one," the villain murmurs into your ear before he gently bites your earlobe. You squeak, barely able to hear his next words through the rush of blood in your veins. "I’d keep you all for myself. Lock you away where no one can find you except me."
Huffing, you manage to regain a bit of your mental faculties and lift your chin with a playful scowl. "Hmph, don't villains usually use traps to keep their victims in place? Iron cages, steel chains, etc.? Come on, Mr. No. 1 Most Wanted Villain, where's the showmanship? Did watching Megamind teach you nothing?!"
A laugh escapes Ray at your demand, a burst of mirth that has you fighting back matching snickers. One hand slides up your arm and, and he pulls you closer until your chest is flush with his. The other grabs you by the waist, tipping you off balance and pinning you to the couch.
"How's this for showmanship, Star?" Ray scoffs as he rakes over your prone form with carnal amusement. His hand leaves your hip, dipping beneath your shirt before tracing upwards and taking the fabric with it. Your nipples pebble in the cool air, vulnerable beneath those void-black eyes.
You’ve gotten a taste of Ray’s possessiveness before – several times in fact – but it never fails to stun you, to send heat rushing between your thighs every time you catch a glimpse of that depthless stare. The lengths he’s gone, that he would go to, for you. Especially after having cast off the NAHA’s paper-thin restrictions.
Fear would be the normal response, the expected emotional outcome. Yet when callused fingers pinch your nipples all you can do is moan.
"So whiny, Star,” Ray coos against your chest, teasing and tasting your buds until they’re bruised and sore. You scream when his mouth closes over the right one, tongue laving over swollen stiff peaks. “And so loud. Is this what you want, hm? You want me to ruin you?"
You can’t speak. The only thing that leaves your throat are helpless, wordless sounds. Ray clicks his teeth, and his hand slides up, applying just the slightest bit of pressure on your throat. A warning.
"What’s that Star?” The villain queries, voice dripping with false curiosity. “Isn’t this what you like? To be helpless under me, in my control. All for my own selfish pleasure? Come on sweetheart, speak up."
“Y-You wish!” you kick out your feet, but Ray simply cants his head to the side and catches your flailing ankle. When he wedges himself firmly between your thighs and hooks your legs over his shoulder, you realize what a terrible mistake you’ve made.
"You little brat…" Ray pushes your ankle further up on his shoulder, restricting you even more as he smirks down at you with a gentle yet terrifying arrogance. It is the look of a wolf watching a caged rabbit, a predator contemplating what to do with cornered prey. Pressing his taller frame against you, Ray’s free hand moves to your hip where the pointer finger dips past the edge of your underwear. It’s barely a brush, and yet the sensation makes your head spin. “Do I have to force it out of you, Star?”
You stubbornly bite your bottom lip, and Ray let out a helpless sigh as if to say, you asked for this.
“Mmph, R-Ray!” The sound of flesh meeting flesh echoes in the room, desperate screams filling the air as you squirm and struggle to escape the steel-trap of Ray’s arms though you know it’s futile. “P-Please, m’sorry–!”
“If you’re so sorry, then stay still,” he grunts, punctuating his words with a harsh thrust, one hard enough to jolt the couch several inches across the floor. Your neck and chest are a canvas of bruises and bite marks. Drool falls from the corner of your lips, filthy and messy. The sight of you underneath him, teary-eyed and begging for mercy, was intoxicating and the ex-hero can’t stop the dangerous smile that crosses his face.
Your body convulses as another orgasm shakes through you, the fifth in the past hour, and Ray groans when you squeeze around his cock. He pulls out to admire the sticky mess between your thighs, cum glazing your puffy hole in a lewd display.
Just as you’re catching your breath, Ray pinches your chin and drags your gaze back to meet his. “Uh-uh, we’re not done Star,” his grin widens at your stricken expression. “I want a proper apology, sweetheart. Now open your mouth and say ah.”
#i don't write enough bsh fics considering how often i daydream about this man#binary star hero#bshvn#bsh fic#bsh ray x reader#my fic#yandere x reader#yandere smut
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do you think there would be any future posibility for dejammed shmilk to grow fond of the younger cookies(ginger, wizard, strawberry, etc) and maybe his entertainer persona could come to play in showing them cool things or tricks?
the fucking giggle i let out when i read this ask. anon, you know me so well
anyway, a bit more of a serious answer, thats honestly one of main things that made me wanna start this au. i love character exploration, observing them under a microscope and putting them in situations (especially difficult or unusual to them personally) to see how theyd act.
i really want to put shilk through the horrors of regaining something that he lost a long time ago when he started corrupting. and now that he is basically a regular cookie again, he has the opportunity to interact with others. and the more he spends time with others, the more familiar everything becomes. the hostility and malice slowly melts when he actually realizes that teaching again, or trying to get a genuine laugh out of someone feels... good?
sharing his knowledge with the pink robot kid who soaks up all of it like a sponge and always wants to learn more, or teaching the self-taught wizard hat twerp some more complicated magics, or organizing a show that doesnt require tormenting people, instead providing them with actual fun times is a surprisingly nice change
and it only gets worse when the inevitable soft spot starts forming. oh the horrors, disgusting. all of this is temporary while they work towards a common goal. he cant have a funny feeling in his chest when children let out a genuine laugh, or when the little wizard gleefully manages to cast a difficult spell they both have been working on. unacceptable, stomp that feeling down into the ground and bury it
i wont say he mellows out that much though, i dont want for him to lose what makes him a fun character. plus itd just erase not only what he has done, but also what he experienced. i dont want it to be a total redemption and change of character, but at the same time... i just like the stories where villains/antagonists have to work with the protagonists for one reason or another, becoming begrudging allies and starting to actually bond (megamind or coach oleander and loboto, not to mention earlier ice king or dr nefarious and many other cases)
also, in case anyone wondered if it also includes the other beasts...
hehe
#ask#anon#dejammed au#shadow milk cookie#i dont want to wobbify him or sand off his sharp edges#shadow milk doesnt mellow out that much but also he gets better#i am being a bit cautious tho since theres the second part of his and pv arc incoming soon#i have hopes. we will see if these end up being fulfilled#my art#fanart#digital art#long post
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Hi,Ummm,good morning/night
Can I request something regarding the Rottmnt boys,I want them their love at first sight with a female reader in a school ay(More like a mix between the Yokai/mutant/human society
(No rush,It's ok if you don't want to do it and stuff,It's totally fine to take your time☺️,Have a nice day/night)
Love at first sight
Aged up! Rottmnt x fem! Reader
(somewhere around their 20s)
Warnings:
None
A/N: this was so hard to do for me for some reason (especially Mikey and Raph), i had to think for a few days for certain scenarios and this might come late bc i rlly want it to be good. Im sorry if it isnt what u expected 🙏

You were an English teacher who recently started working at a new school. Youre quite nervous, but exciting at the thought of what awaits you with this sudden change.
Donnie
- Donnie was one of those strict science teachers that nobody dared to underestimate.
- At first, he didnt seem too interested when he heard of a new teacher who started working there.
- hes never even been a romantic type, he honestly didnt care and let fate decide if he gets a partner or not.
- When he saw you for the first time though, he thought he might be hallucinating.
- "Oh sweet Galileo help me.."
- you probably immediately checked his "cute but mean" type without even saying a single word
- He became more interested in you, talking to you more often, even at times asking u to meet up during the break.
- "Hey, uhm.. Could i maybe interest u in some coffee during the break?"
- he thought all of this "romantic feeling" thing wasnt real, but he seriously cant help but fall for you.
Leo
- Leo is obviously the laid-back cool Spanish teacher.
- Almost every student liked him, he was chill and even jokes around
- (he once drew donnie on the board with a huge forehead and wrote "megamind" next to it)(no, donnie did not take that well)
- He was quite interested when he heard of a new teacher, hell he was probably the first one to interact with you out of his brothers
- The second he saw you, this mf fell straight face down in love with you
- "oh mi gosh thats the new teacher?! Shes gorgeous! Do you see her Donnie?! You see her?! Oh i so need to get her number!!"
- tries to act sly and flirt with you
- and fails miserably
- "Hey there hermosa, how do you feel about a date? Ya know, just you and me? *Wink wink* *leans on wall, trips and falls miserably*"
- (A/N: i cried writing that)
Mikey
- Mikey is the sweet art teacher and students enjoy being around him, but yet again they probably wont dare to underestimate his "Dr. Delicate touch" side
- He was quite excited when he heard about a new teacher.
- When he saw you, he suddenly felt nervous and flustered. And he knew why.
- at this point, everyone but you knew abt how he admires you, a little more than in the friendly way.
- He couldnt get the courage to go and talk to you, which put Dr. Feelings to shame
- When you actually started talking tho, you got quite close.
- Youd be with him almost every break
- You would often stay in his classroom/art studio and watch him paint during the lunch break
- and during those times he even asks u to pick his colours
- "Hey Y/n, which colour do you think would suit the ladies dress more? Red or blue?"
- Sometimes you even jokingly ask to be his model, but in all honesty he doesn't mind at all
- you guys were an inseparable duo, and he caught himself falling more and more for you
Raph
- He's the PE teacher, hes fun but strict when he needs to be.
- He doesnt mind that theres a new teacher, hes quite excited abt it actually - he would gladly want to meet you.
- First thing that catches his eye is that he thinks youre really pretty.
- He's most likely stuttering during ur first convo now😭
- Hes super sweet, bringing you coffee and/or lunch, helping u out with random teacher stuff, checking up of u, ect
- "Hey! How you feeling? I brought you some coffee.. if youd like."
- Hes so shy, but he cant help but feel his heart flutter every time you thank him or show appreciation towards him
A/N: Raph was so hard and i know it's not accurate at all. Ive literally been beating my ass up bc of him cuz i didnt have any ideas😭😭 this took super long and I'm really sorry about that, i hope it turned out the way u wanted🙏 anyways its 1AM so im js posting this cuz i have nothing else to do😔
#rise of the tmnt#rise leo#rise!donnie x reader#rottmnt mikey#rottmnt donnie#raphael rottmnt#rottmnt leo#rottmnt#rottmnt x reader#rottmnt x you#rottmnt donnie x reader#rottmnt raph x reader#rottmnt mikey x reader#rottmnt leo x reader#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise leo x reader#rise mikey#rise donnie#rise of the turtles#tmnt 2018#rottmnt fluff#rise disaster twins#leonardo tmnt#tmnt donnie#tmnt raphael#tmnt mikey#leo x reader#donnie x reader#rise donnie x reader#rise raph x reader
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Hii hii! I hope your doing okay today or tonight, I was wondering if you could write something for dazai (idm if it’s scenario, hc or mix of it and if you add another character you really want to write about).
The request basically is; a reader who finally told Dazai about their past abuser, how they got away with no consequences (who reader mentioned seeing sometimes in the city) and later said abuser goes to the agency on behalf their company to investigate missing items.
Stuff like this is really comforting for me so thank you if you do it :D I hope I put in enough detail for you to work with.

DAZAI AND CONSEQUENCES
A/N: baby, I’m so sorry, but this is long asf and I got a lil carried away💀 I’m also sorry it took a bit to get out. I work in a nursery, so I work 12 hours shifts, and this got to me slam in the middle of my first one (out of three in a row). If this isn’t what you wanted, you can send me in another ask :) But I hope you like it
WARNING(s): reader was in a physically abusive relationship in the past, mentions of PTSD, canon-typical violence, mentions of panic attacks, pissed off dazai, reader is a girl
—I'm gonna assume this is like a pt. 2 of this writing, but it can stand alone, too :)
—We all know Dazai is megamind over here. He sees EVERYTHING. Nothing goes unnoticed by him (which you probably find a little annoying, tbh, but oh, well). It's especially annoying when he knows things about you that you don't necessarily want him to know
—HOWEVER, if it's something that you physically and emotionally feel like you cannot talk about, like it brings you distress and discomfort, he's very unlikely to push you about it. Let's be honest, this man's probably never even told you the name of his parents. You don't even know if Dazai Osamu IS his real name, so he knows he hasn't got room to talk
—I feel like if Dazai noticed something about your mannerisms, or the way you act that very obviously speaks to past trauma, he'd ask you about it, like in my previous writing. If you're unable or unwilling to talk about it, he drops it. He SO desperately wants to know, but he cares for you too much to put you in any sort of emotional distress by pushing it
—When you do decide to open up to him, he's all ears. He knows how hard it is to speak about the shadows of your past, and he honestly is just so flattered that you trust him (he can't believe it, lmao. Like, three people in his life truly trust him) enough to tell him about it
—You were sitting on the edge of the bathtub in Osamu's apartment, absently watching him comb through his wet hair. The two of you had showered together, and you couldn't help but notice over the months of your relationship how much he had changed.
Osamu was flighty at first, and very distrustful. He wasn't a fan of placing himself in vulnerable positions. Not just to you, but to anyone. Yet, when you'd gently brought up his lack of self care, and how it made you sad to see the person you loved think so little of themselves, a change happened.
You helped, of course. At first, you reminded him to brush his teeth when he forgot, and then you began combing his hair. You'd point out when it was time to change his bandages, and call him to bed at an acceptable time because you knew he'd just stay up until the early hours of the morning (if he slept at all). Together, you two had even begun cooking meals, and he'd started to fill out a little bit.
Now, he made sure to do all of those things, even if you didn't remind him/cook with him, because he felt better, yes, but also because he could see how happy it made you.
He was still suffering from chronic depression, of course. You knew you couldn't fix that, and were thinking about gently bringing up a therapist to him, but he had gotten so much better. Even his coworkers noticed it.
Osamu dragged a comb through his brown waves, eyes narrowed as he focused intently on it. It meant so much to you. How could he not focus on it?
You knew it, too. He would've never made these changes for himself, but he had begun to trust that you had his best interest at heart. A few weeks ago, he'd even opened up about some of his own traumas surrounding Mori and the Port Mafia, about his best friend, Oda Sakunosuke.
Osamu trusted you.
That was why it felt so wrong to keep your own past from him, because he was finally starting to open up. You feared if you didn't return the favor, he'd wilt again. More so, you'd recently been catching yourself let parts of the story slip. Subconsciously, you wanted so badly to tell him.
"What are you thinking so hard about?" He asked lightly, brown eyes sparkling with so much affection that it had your breath catching. Osamu was watching you from the mirror.
You blinked, realizing you'd been out of it for a moment, lost in thought. In your lap, you fiddled with your fingers. Part of you wanted to shut down as your heart plummeted at the thought of reliving the worst of it...
But the way he looked at you, like you hung the sun and the stars, like he felt such fondness for you that 'I love you' simply didn't cut it...
It was time to tell him.
"Can... Can we talk?" you asked, surprised by the softness of your voice. It was almost ashamed, but you knew you shouldn't feel shame for what had happened to you.
Only, you were so scared he'd feel ashamed of you.
Osamu was a great aim, and he was smart as a whip, and he was oddly strong for his thin figure. He'd never let himself stay in the sort of situation you did. He'd fight back.
You felt so small.
He turned to look at you, leaning back on the bathroom counter. His eyes were gentle and knowing, and you couldn't tell if you were upset that he already knew what this was about, or relieved. "Of course," he said with a little smile, squatting down in front of you and taking your hands in his. "What about?"
You gulped, knowing there was no turning back now. If you told him this, you'd be trusting him with probably the worst part of your life. Even imagining it, the past with him, made you sick to your stomach.
You knew you'd backtrack if you didn't just rip it off like a bandaid.
"I overreact to things sometimes," you whispered, and he squeezed your hands. "I'm sure you've noticed it."
"I wouldn't use the word 'overreact.'"
You chewed on your lips nervously, staring into his eyes. Thankfully, all you saw there was understanding, but it was still so hard. "My ex beat me. For years... Anytime I did... anything, pretty much. It was bad." Your voice cracked as you continued, tears welling in your eyes. "I couldn't see my family... I ended up in the ER a few times. He broke me, Osamu. He had me convinced I'd never trust another man."
You waited with baited breath for his reaction, trying to hold in the tears. Your eyes stung and your breathing was speeding up into gasps, because you hadn't even told your family or closest friends the full extent of it.
Osamu looked oddly calm, but at the sight of your fallen tears, he got up to sit beside you. Wrapping an arm around your shoulders, he pulled you in close, flush against him, and kissed your temple. "Breathe, baby. It's all right now," he whispered, squeezing you close.
You couldn't stop it now, though. What had been building up since you left your ex was being released right here, right now. There was no turning back. Hot tears rolled down your cheeks and clouded your eyesight. Subconsciously, you grabbed his shirt in a tight grip and squeezed until your hand ached.
"He beat the shit out of me, and nothing ever happened," you continued, the anguish in your voice now laced by anger. "He broke my collarbone... my jaw—my ribs and my wrist. He made me feel like an ant, like I was so small, and I still feel that way now, and even after I left him... I'm still suffering, but he gets to go about his life like it was nothing. I couldn't even go to the police—he said he'd kill me," you got out through gasps, squeezing your eyes closed as your vision had started to darken at the edges, anyways.
Osamu's eyes flashed with something you didn't recognize, but all he knew to do was pull you in tighter. He placed a hand on your head and pulled you into his chest, and you certainly weren't trying to resist.
"It's not fair," you added, knowing how childish you sounded. Nothing was ever fair. Here you were, saying all this to a man who had probably done much worse than just break people's bones, complaining about fairness.
You weren't a child. You knew life wasn't fair, but that didn't mean it didn't fucking suck that it wasn't.
"Sometimes, I still see him, you know... In town, I—" You had to stop, otherwise you'd make it worse for yourself.
He held you close, rubbing your back and gently scratching your scalp as he whispered for you to breathe. Osamu knew you were about to land neck deep into a panic attack.
Eventually, he did get you calmed down. He got you to bed, made you a mug of hot chocolate, and read to you for about thirty minutes before you were able to catch your breath, his smooth voice calming you better than any benzo could.
In the end, you two lied down together, your back pressed to his front. The bandaged arm that was wrapped around your waist felt like a safety blanket. You were sure you'd be embarrassed about your outburst tomorrow, but for right now, you simply soaked up the feeling of him wrapped around you so snugly.
"You're not small," he whispered to you, and that was the last thing you remembered before passing out.
—Dazai doesn't seem different to you afterwards, in that he doesn't act differently towards you. You were worried at first that he'd see you differently, that he'd see you as being as weak as you saw yourself, but it was the furthest thing from. He respects the hell out of people who can go through such terrible things, and yet come out so kind, so good
—While he doesn't seem different, inwardly you can bet he's raging. Dazai is PISSED OFF, more than he's been in years. He's made great progress, but let's not forget that Dazai can be a cruel mf. He's got a darkness in him that he doesn't want you to see, but it is definitely there
—He doesn't press you for anymore details, but he can't help himself. He digs. He uses his brilliance to find out who the guy is, who his name is, and any time he feels even a slight bit of guilt at digging into your past life without your knowledge, he reminds himself of the injuries you listed.
—You thought he'd forget the things you admitted during your confession? PLEASE. He needs to know everything about this fucking piece of work. If he has a photo, he might even text it to Chuuya, along with a message "wanted alive," and you best bet Chuuya takes it seriously (even if he hates Dazai, lmao) because just by LOOKING at the photo of this guy, everyone can tell he's an asshole. And you still see this mf sometimes? Man is RAGING
—Dazai stands on business, because seeing you so torn up about it physically hurts him. It makes his heart ache every time he remembers you in that state. He can't fucking stand it, and he has to do something about it
—Your words about it being unfair haunt him in his nightmares. You're right to a degree: the world isn't fair. However, Dazai knows that if it takes him a million years, he's gonna make this shit fair
—Then, what do you know, one day he's at the office and Atsushi comes strolling in with a Manila folder and the piece of shit, himself. There he is, practically served to Dazai on a silver platter
—"This is Tanaka Jiro," Atsushi chirped, missing the way Dazai's eyes widened when he saw the new client. "He's here on behalf of the engineering company that got broken into last night."
Dazai sat up in his chair, staring right at the man who had the gall to make you feel small and weak. His eyes darkened, and then he slowly smiled. It wasn't happy or gentle, or even playful and teasing.
He smiled like Mori smiled.
In that moment, if his coat was black instead of tan, he'd look the picture of his younger, crueler self. He supposed that part of him never went away, always there just at the edge of his subconscious.
He promised Odasaku that he'd push it away, that he'd do good. However, he felt that even Odasaku, his kind friend, would understand the necessity of it now.
Immediately, he jumped out of his chair and made his way over. His hand landed on Atsushi's hair, giving it a playful ruffle. As he looked at him, his eyes softened. "Maa, Atsushi-kun. You work too hard, you know. I'll take this case for you."
Atsushi stared at him with obvious shock, eyes wide and jaw on the floor, because Dazai never, ever volunteered to work. If anything, he complained about it like a child.
"D-Dazai-san?" he breathed, in disbelief. It looked like he thought someone had killed the real Dazai, and was now acting in his place.
"Ah, ah," Dazai chirped, shoving Atsushi away. "Go do normal teenager things. Flirt, make friends," his voice trailed off as his gaze slid to Tanaka, your ex, and the smirk lifted his lips once more, eyes flashing dangerously, "all of that."
"O-Okay," Atsushi mumbled, still in shock. He recovered quickly, smiling brightly at Tanaka. "Dazai-san is a very good detective, Tanaka-san. You're in good hands!" he promised.
Tanaka smiled back, and seeing the bastard have the audacity to smile had Dazai seething internally.
Maybe, he'd take all his teeth, so that he could never smile again.
"Thank you for your help, Nakajima-kun," Tanaka said, nodding.
As Atsushi walked off, Dazai tilted his head to the side, his plan already formed. "Follow me to answer some questions, and then I'll begin investigating right away."
—For Dazai's plan to pay off, he needs to figure out who broke into the company. It wasn't a planned event, and he quickly figured out the guy who did it probably had no connection to the company (probably just a low down thief looking for some quick cash), which made it more difficult. It was the sort of not-really-a-big-deal crime that the agency would usually put on the back burner (the only reason it even came to them was because the thief was figured to be gifted), but Dazai worked tirelessly at it
—He interviewed people, looked over documents from dusk to dawn, and just generally put in a hell of a lot more effort for this than he usually would for some petty theft
—You probably even notice how hard he's working. There are bags under his eyes and he's back to not taking very good care of himself, but when you ask about it (obviously worried), he just smiles gently, kisses you, and assures you that he'll have this case figured out in no time. He doesn't want you anywhere near this
—When he does find the criminal, their interaction goes something like this:
"I know you did it. Give me the shit you stole, and I'll let you off."
"Bet."
—He has this part meticulously planned out. While your ex is in work one day, Dazai plants the stolen items in his car, and then calls the company security
—He watches with glee as he's dragged from the building, kicking and screaming like an enraged toddler, and fired on the spot. Your ex's livelihood? Gone. Phase one? Completed
—Dazai sat at his desk with a satisfied smile, chin resting in the palm of his hand as he counted down in his head. Everyone else is entrenched in their own workloads, barely even noticing the malicious sparkle in Dazai's eyes.
Soon enough, the door bursted open, and your ex came running in. His eyes were rimmed red, like he'd been crying, and he was flushed all over from rage. "What the fuck did you do?!" he demanded, pointing at Dazai.
"What do you mean?" he asked innocently, standing and walking over with the same smile.
Everyone else stopped what they were doing, watching the scene with widened, or curious eyes. This sort of thing didn't happen much at the ADA.
"You know what the fuck I mean, you piece of shit!" Tanaka screamed in his face, and it only made Dazai's smile widen. When he saw this, he hissed, "I think we should take this outside."
"Hold on," demanded Atsushi, immediately standing from his desk, along with Kyouka and Kenji.
Dazai didn't even look at them, staring into Tanaka's eyes, as he held up his hand to stop them in their tracks. The smile melted off his face, replaced by a cold glare and lips pressed into a line. "I'm fine," he assured them, light tone not at all matching his expression.
"But—Dazai-san," Atsushi mumbled, eyes flickering between Dazai and Tanaka.
"You guys are so dramatic," Ranpo said with a roll of his eyes, absently watching the scene from his desk, which his feet were propped up on. "Dazai-kun said it's fine."
Dazai tilted his head mockingly at Tanaka. "Are we going outside?"
That, they did. Tanaka stomped down the stairs and through the cafe, out onto the crowded streets of Yokohama.
Dazai followed, of course, even as Tanaka led him towards a darkened alleyway, obstructed from the view of the general public. Inwardly, he thought that this guy was making it way too easy. He was an idiot.
Tanaka stared at the dead end wall for a minute, and then let out a cry of rage, turned on his heel, and began running at Dazai with his arm pulled back and his hand clenched into a fist.
Nonplussed, Dazai side stepped it, loving every minute of the surprise on Tanaka's face. "What? Did you think fighting someone your own size would be as easy as beating on a girl?"
That had Tanaka freezing immediately. "What the fuck are you talking about?" he growled out, and Dazai almost laughed at his attempt to be menacing and scary.
Right on time, a black SUV pulled up. He might not be in the mafia anymore, but Dazai had plenty of contacts from it. When masked men jumped out of the vehicle, surrounding Tanaka, Dazai smirked at the look of pure terror on his face.
"Don't play dumb. You aren't handsome enough to pull it off," he said lightly, and then laughed as Tanaka tried to call for help.
He was knocked out before he could.
When he awoke, eyes all bleary and with a searing headache, he was in a big, dark warehouse. It was old and beaten, with leaking pipes and creaky doors. He was sitting in a chair, hands cuffed together behind him.
Tanaka screamed.
Dazai walked in front of him casually, hands tucked into his pockets. "Scream all you like. No one will hear you," he said.
"Why are you doing this?! Who even are you, man?!" Tanaka cried, the tears falling down his cheeks. He looked so pathetic.
Dazai loved every second of it.
He hummed, walking forward until he was right in front of the bastard, footsteps echoing around the wide open space. Grabbing a fist full of Tanaka's hair, Dazai yanked his head back, so he'd be looking up at him, so he could see the icy glare, the hate.
"You hurt someone I'm very fond," Dazai said softly, tilting his head. "You hurt someone I love... And ever since she told me, I've been thinking of ways to make it fair for her. It's all I've thought about.
"She's not like you and me, you know. She's kind. She's sweet. She's good. You," Dazai scoffed, "you're pathetic. A man who has to beat defenseless women to feel good about himself is no man." When he leaned in close, so his lips were inching his ear, Tanaka whimpered. "And me? I'm the worst of the worst."
Now, all Tanaka could do was cry and plead, but Dazai wasn't having any of it. He let go of Tanaka's hair, letting his head fall limply, enjoying the sounds of his uttered prayer. "No god can save you from me," he told him in a pleasant voice, taking a few steps back.
Dazai crossed his arms and hummed thoughtfully, making a show of it. "I thought I could just kill you, but that's not really fair, is it? She has to live with what you did to her, and I think the fairest thing would be if you have to live with what I do to you."
"You're fucking psychotic," Tanaka whispered.
"Ah," Dazai agreed easily. "I've always been more of a proponent of revenge, rather than justice. See, she probably just wishes you'd have gone to jail." His casual tone melted into something deeper and smoother, deadlier. "Whereas I'm more of an eye-for-an-eye kind of guy, so..." He pursed his lips in faux thought, looking up at the ceiling. "What was it she said?"
Tanaka stared at him in horror, especially when Dazai stared him straight in the eye and smiled.
"Right. Broken jaw, collarbone, ribs, and wrist!" He said, snapping as if he'd just remembered it, as if your broken confession hadn't been causing him physical pain this whole time. "I have plenty of history with breaking jaws, so I guess we'll start there. What do you say?" he asked brightly.
Tanaka screamed again, the sound becoming a cry of raw terror as Dazai began walking towards him.
An hour later, Tanaka still sat in his chair, still handcuffed, but he was bloody and bruised. Every injury he inflicted on you, Dazai returned tenfold. He was delirious with pain, and in and out of consciousness.
Dazai grunted when he looked down at his hands, seeing the blood that absolutely coated his knuckles and bandages. He'd have to clean that up before coming home to you.
"You up?" he asked, walking closer.
When Tanaka immediately flinched back, Dazai hummed with satisfaction.
"I won't kill you," he said, as if he was doing Tanaka some great favor. "You're going to go about your pathetic, little life with no job, and every time you look at yourself, you'll remember this pain. You'll finally feel at least a fraction of what she did."
Tanaka just whimpered. It was hard to speak with a shattered jaw.
Dazai smiled at the sound, crouching down in front of him to force Tanaka to look him in the face, in the eyes. "The men who kidnapped you are going to drop you off at a hospital. They'll ask what happened, and you'll be tempted to tell them. So," his tone lowered into a hiss, breaking the somewhat casual facade now that Tanaka had physically felt his anger. There was no point hiding it now. "I'll tell you the same thing you told her at her lowest point, that defenseless girl who didn't stand a chance against a piece of shit like you: tell the cops, and I'll kill you."
Dazai stood, jaw clenched. "And I'll be watching you from now. Step a toe out of line, hurt anyone else, and I'll bring you right back here. Only, that time, I'll probably just go ahead and do the whole world a favor, and shoot you in the head.
"I bet no one would miss you at all, because that's how small you are."
With that, he walked away.
—I know that was pretty brutal, but to be honest, y'all, Dazai was a whole ass executive in the PM (the 'demon prodigy'). He tries to hold it back in the ADA (per his promise to Oda and his care for the others), but let's not kid ourselves. The guy does have the capacity to do some really evil shit, and I think if he'd do it for anyone, it'd be you
—It just pisses him off so much to feel helpless, especially when it comes to you. He couldn't save you, then, but he can damn well set the record straight. In his head, he had to do something. At the very least, he had to stop this guy from doing it again
—You were eating dinner with him that night, and hadn't really noticed anything out of the ordinary. Both of you were just sitting at the counter, digging into some instant ramen, and you probably wouldn't have noticed if you didn't pay such close attention to him.
There was a speck of blood on the collar of his coat.
"Hey, what happened?" you asked, concern pinching together your brows. Worried eyes scanned him over, looking for any sign of injury. You found none, though.
"It's not mine," Osamu answered, and then took a bite of his food, looking pointedly away from you.
You pursed your lips, tapping his wrist. "We don't lie to each other, O-sa-mu."
He couldn't help but smile a little at your tone. His eyes finally met your's, and he tapped your wrist back. "It's not a lie. It's-not-mine."
"It's a lie by omission if you don't tell me what happened."
You were terribly confused when his eyes softened, and then he gently pressed his hand to the back of your head, bringing you closer until your foreheads were touching. "What's wrong?" you mumbled.
"I can't tell you everything," he admitted slowly, eyes shut. He looked so peaceful, like he was where he was meant to me. Honestly, when Osamu was all soft like this, it took your breath away.
"Then tell me part of it," you breathed, reaching up to cup your hand around his neck. "Did something happen?"
He stayed quiet for a long time, though you didn't know how long. It was like he was contemplating something serious, and that both confused and worried you.
When he finally did speak, it felt like time froze. Everything froze.
"I made it fair. He won't ever hurt anyone else again. I made sure of it."
The words were a whispered promise, and you automatically knew what he was talking about, of course. He was mysterious, and he had been distrustful at first, and you knew he had once been in the mafia, but he was also the person you trusted the most in the world.
Osamu always went above and beyond for you, and you didn't feel as safe anywhere as you did with him.
You believed him wholeheartedly, and found that this admission was enough. You didn't need to know the details, and probably wouldn't want to.
The relief you felt was enough.
"Thank you, Osamu."
—Look, he's so bby girl with you, but he don't play when it comes to your abusive ex💀
—Just... just honestly don't fuck with the people this guy loves, okay? He's gd diabolical, and he can be so cruel to those that hurt who he cares about, so... Just watch it if you're tryna show out to his girl, okay, lmao

#dazai osamu x reader#osamu dazai x reader#dazai x reader#dazai osamu x you#osamu dazai x you#dazai x you#bungou stray dogs#dazai osamu#makochi’s hc/scenario mix
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"Are there any characters as evil as Atra Menta? And does she have any rivals or enemies?"
[i posted a long-ass answer to this question on retrospring so i want it here too]
powerscaling the evil of my characters. lucky for you i have thought about it.
first of all we have to determine what we mean by evil. there's what i'd consider real/dark evil, as in evil that's too real--racism, -phobias, rape, murder, capitalism. the kind of stuff that, unless you're Into It Into It, you wouldn't want in your porn. then there's cartoon evil, pomp and schemes, devices, costumes, tricks and banter and sexy predicaments. the fun stuff.
realizing slightly too late i could have just pointed at the difference between a villain and a supervillain bit from megamind. anyway.
i would categorize atra menta as a mature cartoon villain. cause she's obviously committing what are unambiguously sex crimes, but we're all having fun playing in the space. she's doing what she wants when she wants and how she wants it, and she has the power to back herself up. the limits of what she would and won't do are unknown on the basis we would simply never see her do any especially horrible stuff, and any work she appears in won't treat her acts as so unbearably horrible. like maleficent puts a curse a baby to die an early death for nothing, and that's awful when you put it that way, but we don't really think of it like that, because we know, tonally, it'll be fine. it's that sort of thing.
so she's The Most Evil because that's her shtick but i wouldn't consider her the Darkest. like i would think of osmund as a darker character because his goals are more specific and personal and therefore more likely to be real to an individual reader. "go my minions! burn down a village!" is, in an objective sense, a worse crime than grooming one man. but one of those is less likely to be upsetting on a personal level.
as for rivals/enemies, none that i've settled on as like, a distinct part of her narrative. osmund is closest to her in power and could hold his own in a conflict, but i think she could still defeat him on the basis that she needn't hold back for the sake of appearances the way he does. romick fantasizes about fucking her and likes to think he could win but she'd beat him easily. she'd actually be more threatened by the doll, with her control over the tower, than she would be by romick. and cadogan and jerund have zero interest in her or her business. not my circus not my monkeys. i'm good over here.
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TOH Fans Don't Know What Redemption Is
TL:DR: TOH as a show uses the tropes and veneer of redemption a lot but fails to actually engage with the fact that redemption is not about no longer being a dick. Your kind of a dick friend does not need to be redeemed for calling you names, they just need to stop calling you names. No, redemption is about making up for past sins... Which TOH never does.
You do not go to confessional to tell someone you did something bad and then ask them to forget about it. You go there to be told what you must do to be redeemed in the eyes of the Lord or to be assured that there was no sin in the first place. If there was, you are asked to perform a service, even if just a set of prayers, to make up for your slip in faith and show your devotion to the path of good. You sacrifice your time and seek to do better. That is inherently a part of redemption. I frame this religiously but hey, if you get rowdy in your buddy's house when they asked you not to and you break something of theirs, you don't just apologize. You usually actually try to make it up to them if you can because otherwise all you've done is give them words when it's actions that spoke for your disregard to them. You might even ask what you can do to make it up to them.
For an absolutely classic and genuinely amazing example of this: Megamind. In the middle of his arc, Roxanne makes it clear that what Megamind has done has hurt her. Hurt what she cares about. That it has made her world worse. What does Megamind do? He returns the art, he cleans up the city... In his own way and in general UNDOES HIS CRIMES. In that one moment, he stops being selfish and actively attempts to make up for it for someone else by righting his wrongs. The worst you can say is that he's doing it because he likes someone and wants their affection but like... Yeah, that's the motivation to change and Megamind even admits himself that he's finding doing good to be enjoyable now. It's a powerful moment because it so clearly contrasts who he was in a way that would be impossible if he were not seeking redemption and being redeemed.
The ONE TIME TOH actually manages this is Lilith. She recognizes that cursing her sister was wrong. She recognizes that her attempts to be the most powerful person on the Isles was wrong. As such, her betrayal of Belos is NOT her redemption. If she chose to betray Belos because she personal gain in it or saw that it was a dead end in life, it would not be redeeming (this will come up later). Instead, she is truly redeemed because she gives up potentially everything but especially her ability to be above others and her sister by taking the curse unto herself. By sharing that burden she was responsible for first and acknowledging that what she did, specifically, was wrong.
People don't champion Lilith though as some great redemption, do they? Not when it comes to TOH. She's overshadowed by the ones given more of a to do like Hunter, Amity and The Collector. Especially those first two though. So, how do they manage?
Amity has crimes. She bullied Willow when she did not have to as Odalia's demand was ONLY to stop being friends with her. She bullied Willow regardless. She attempted to murder Luz. She tried to remove Luz's ability to use magic and was overall just a general bitch who was more than happy to keep taunting Luz for entertainment. She is genuinely a fucking AWFUL human being at the beginning of the series. Does she even bother recognizing this?
No. Not with more than words. That's all Willow gets. In fact, Amity is so disinterested in making up for being a bitch to Willow that she ignores EVERYTHING about her for almost an entire season after they 'make up' which they only make up with words. Amity just says the right thing and seems to think that's all it takes. She still uses Willow for her own selfish needs in Falls and Follies and she doesn't respect Willow during Labyrinth Runners. She does literally nothing to actually redeem herself for this.
How about refuting Boscha or her mom? Those are pretty big deals and against her old self, right? Well, yes and no but we need to interrogate the why for that. To the audience, it is meant to signify Amity giving up her past influences to be a better person. As I stated at the top, it is a common trope in redemption arcs which TOH does engage with. However... She's doing them for Luz and not because of the past. She tells Boscha to go fuck herself not because Amity was a grade A bitch with Boscha but because Boscha is now bullying someone she cares about so she can dropped just as fast and brutally as she did Willow in the past for the sake of pleasing someone else. NOTHING about her behavior is different except now she's doing it for someone as good. That's not redemption. We don't praise the Punisher here just because he murders bad men. Odalia is similar. It's not to make up for Odalia's influence or the things she did because of Odalia, it is to selfishly proclaim her own personhood... And more importantly, save her girlfriend. It's not even to make up for the expulsion, it's JUST to keep Luz alive. Yes, she gets them unexpelled but only once she first acts for the sake of Luz not dying. She has NO INTEREST in getting involved until then and at that point, it's not her crime, it's Odalia's. That's what makes her motivation being Luz not work because the motivation might be Luz, but the result isn't her facing her past, it's just facing a cartoonish villain.
And if your argument is "Well, all she did was because of Odalia," I would respond with, "Okay, that not a redemption then, that's just a regular character arc." If your character does not actually try to IN UNIVERSE redeem themselves, how can you call it a redemption arc? Sasha is ready to DIE for all of Wartwood to make up for the fact that they're gonna get wiped off the face of the map because of her. She acknowledges that she was wrong and always wrong and goes out to do something about that. She gives up command to Anne in order to try avoid her old mistakes because she is so actively trying to do better than she used to. Redemption is never easy and requires shit like this. The best way to do it fast is, well... Death.
This is why the heroic sacrifice trope is so beloved for redeemed villains. They go from spending an entire life causing misery and being selfish to making the ultimate sacrifice against that which they stood for. In one moment, they seek that redemption... But expect no reward which only further bolsters how this is redemption. Redemption is selfless. You never HAVE to redeem yourself. You never expect a prize or even a better life from redeeming yourself besides being able to sleep better at night. It's a powerful trope...
And Hunter's version of it is literally the worst example I can think of for the trope. Yes, we technically get him rescuing the Emerald Entrails before this as a moment of redemption but what about just redeeming his time under Belos and as the Golden Guard? Well... Essentially no one even gets more than a token apology for that. He just sob stories his way into people's hearts instead of actually do anything to earn their affection outside of Willow KIND OF. But hey, that should be fine since he does sacrifice his own life, right?
Well, again, context. What does he sacrifice for? Because it's not anyone other than him. Just listen to literally the words he's saying. He talks about how much better his life is now. How much he likes the perks of being a good guy like friends. He barely remembers to include that stopping Belos needs to be a part of this without him just looking like a mooch of a friend because he never mentions how it feels good to help people, how he hates what he did with the Emperor or even that he believes more in self expression now. It's ENTIRELY selfish. He doesn't even expect to die, he's just telling Belos to go fuck himself and ends up dying in the process, which is actually pretty normal for a selfish henchman betrayal it's just that the show doesn't realize that's what he's doing.
This is indicative of the show's approach to redemption as a whole and we even get a thesis statement on that. The Collector. If you just say you're sorry and are on the correct side, you're redeemed! Making up for all the damage you did when you absolutely can fix it in like a week? Actually putting yourself up for punishment by those who's autonomy you took away and then tortured? Fucking ANYTHING besides unpuppeting people that he did for months to terrorize the entire Isles? No. He said he's sorry and he's just a goofy little guy so he's redeemed! Right?... Right?
And then the Collector takes this very basic idea of redemption, of just needing to show a bit of kindness and people will magically change, and applies it to Belos. For only the second time, in the whole series, does it not work. The problem with saying that means the show understands this topic and has nuance is... The other example is Kikimora. Neither of these characters are people. They caricatures of villains. They're so pure evil that the idea of redeeming them is, well... A joke. Literally, in the show, the attempt to redeem Belos is a joke. Why would you think the baby eating psycopath was just going to need a hug? That is the level of cartoon villain we are dealing. That's not nuance, it's bullshit, which is why it has never functioned as a critique of SU like it clearly is, especially not when the person who does it JUST NEEDED A FEW KIND WORDS. Like the Collector literally IS just the arc they describe and then try to mock and never even blinks at this fact.
But we call these redemption arcs because they were tokenly villains before hand. I would at this point argue that we need to stop doing that. If we think TOH even purports the concept of redemption, that implies you can learn how to write redemption through TOH. You can't. Bluntly, you cannot because it barely ever tries and when it fails, it fails miserably.
The Diamonds at least promised, and kept their word, to undo their damages. I don't think you get to mock that with your redemptions when you can't even manage that much 75% of the time. See you next tale.
======+++++======
I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!
I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.
A Twitter you can follow too
And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.
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Dreamling Bingo E2: Role reversal! Angst and Fluff ahead <3
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“He, um-” Matthew says from the windowsill, shifting awkwardly. “He says he'll come back as per your previous agreement. Whatever that means.”
“Yeah, okay,” Hob says faintly into the curve of his arms where he's slumped over the table. He's too numb to feel the heartache. “You can go.”
“Uh,” Matthew says, with a flap of wings that brings his voice closer. Dream's friend, not Hob's, he has to remind himself, even as his heart pangs as the other doesn't leave. “Did you two… fight? You don't sound good, man.”
“Yeah, we fought,” Hob says vaguely, staring at the kitchen tap. “I'll be alright.”
“Buddy, what the fuck, you really don't sound good,” Matthew sounds alarmed. “Look, is there someone we can like, call over for a bit, I don't think you should be alone-”
“I'm not going to kill myself over a bad breakup, Matt,” Hob sighs. “And no, we can't call anyone. I just made half the faculty watch Professor Rob skid over a cliff and burst into flames.”
“Dude,” Matthew says after a moment. “That's fucked up. You do realise people are gonna fucking mourn you, right?”
“Wow, really? Thank you for teaching me, Matthew, I couldn't possibly know this at six hundred years old,” Hob rolls his eyes as he pushes himself to his feet. “And no, I had to fake it, before you ask. Got too attached here, set too many roots down… people would come looking.”
“Like that guy from Megamind,” Matthew offers weakly, and Hob snorts. “But, like. What if the boss comes looking and you're not here?”
“He'll survive,” Hob packs up the last of his books and kicks the remaining ones under the bed as a fun surprise for the next tenant. “Find another human to amuse himself with, I suppose.”
“What on earth happened?” Matthew asks, baffled.
Hob pauses and looks down at his packed box. Shrugs. “I don't know. One minute we were talking, next minute we were arguing and then he… said that-”
His throat closes up and he shakes his head, grabbing the last backpack. Everything else is sent ahead, except this one bag of essentials and items he can't afford to lose. Eleanor's locket is in there, and Dream's bracelet was supposed to be there too- the only gift he'd ever gotten from the other, the only physical proof that he actually existed- except he threw it in a box in a moment of spite and let it go on with the other things.
“Dude, uh, listen, I don't know if-”
“Bye, Matthew.” Hob closes the door and steps out into the night, grabbing his bike as he goes. It probably doesn't warrant all that much of an intricate, convoluted getaway, considering most people don't really go looking for a dead person- but he'll feel better covering his tracks. Especially since he no longer has a mysterious, powerful stranger on his side that he can sort of rely on to eventually come for him.
Hah. On the bright side, though.
He's always wanted to try lycanthropy.
-
He smells the newcomer before he hears him.
The wolf’s ears prick up, turning to stare out at the night sky, lit up by the stars. He breathes in the scent on the wind to be sure, then springs out the den, breath misting in the cold winter air.
The newcomer is loping around aimlessly, looking droll and tired as he trots by the riverbank, looking this way and that. Whatever he's searching for, he won't find it- not this late in the season, when everything's asleep or dead.
Still. It's his territory, so the wolf jumps out of the bushes with a growl and charges.
The strange dark wolf doesn't yelp or scramble away at the aggression like he'd expected, instead freezing in shock, making him crash full force into the intruder and sending them both to the ground.
The intruder still doesn't run when he's down and incapacitated, just lies there and stares up stupidly. The wolf bares his teeth, growling, and that seems to finally get some reaction, a hint of a tail going between his legs, ears going back in fear.
Good. He's the bigger wolf amongst the two of them, the other should-
Hob Gadling.
He stops, ears pricked up as he scans around for another creature. Feels his own ears go back in unease when no one else is there, only the odd stranger, staring at him silently.
He snaps his teeth, unsettled, and finally the stranger reacts like he should, scrambling out of his way as he chases him off, growling and snarling all the while.
He stops when he reaches the edge of his territory, chest heaving. The black wolf is still there, slinking between the trees, staring at him.
Good enough. He doesn't have energy to waste. The wolf trots back to his den and goes back to sleep.
AO3
#dreamling#dream of the endless#hob gadling#dreamling bingo#my fic#matthew#the sandman#it took all fucking day. bone apple teeth jfc
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Round 1 is officially done. There were already some very interesting matches, mainly due to poor seeding on account of my not knowing most of the characters. Let's go over some highlights;
Megamind lost. Which honestly he was like the third or fourth most memey submission so kinda deserved (especially since a lot of other meme submissions won)
Speaking of meme submissions; both Eggman and Myself won their respective polls. I can't take a moral high ground on this since I did vote for both of them but my condolences go out to Gog Agog and Re Zero fans for losing to them.
One of the most devastating upsets of round 1 was the loss of both Groundhog Day characters. Jr was definitely a victim of poor seeding. I should have looked at the length of the other guy's propaganda and given him a higher seed. But Phil Senior?!?! I don't think anyone expected this. And from a meme submission no less. It was a hard fought battle tho. And really I am the only one to blame since the only reason they were even against each other was that I forgot to save a bracket.
Speaking of close matches tho there was none closer than the match between Ángel and Eleanor. The Good Placians definitely had the early advantage for being the generally bigger fandom, but the Beebites fought tooth and nail for the entire week, rallying as many troops as they could. And in the end they barely squeaked out a buzzer beater victory. I would keep your eye on the Beebo in these coming rounds because it is frankly impossible to tell how far they will go.
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Day 5: Any buying regrets?
When you've bought as many as I have, you're always bound to have regrets, for all sorts of reasons, but these three stood out to me in my mind. I try not to hold onto toys I don't want anymore, so these are no longer in my collection.
With Kida, it was mostly her size I didn't vibe with. She was a beautiful doll, and I like Kida as a character, but I have so few dolls in that scale. I tried to love her, but ultimately I realized I shouldn't have bought her at all, especially with how expensive she was. I think I just got caught up in the hype of her getting a new release.
With Ghoulia, she was also beautiful, but I just didn't love her. She sat in her box for months until I sold her off. The fact I never took pics of her should say it all.
I really regretted this last one. I thought he was such a cool find at the store, but that gross mold growing in his little head container couldn't be fixed. Plus he was so large and hard to display. I'm not even that big of a Megamind fan anyway. This was a pure impulse buy I shouldn't have bought.
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Favorite animated movies?
Oh god okay so uh. I guess I'll rattle em off in no particular order but organized by studio. I've bolded the ones that are especially up there for me.
Disney: Beauty and The Beast, The Lion King, The Rescuers Down Under, A Goofy Movie, Tarzan, The Emperor's New Groove, Lilo & Stitch, Frozen (yes i know but i saw that one like five times in theaters when i was REALLY homesick in college), Mickey & The Beanstalk, Runaway Brain (I know it's a short I know but also cmon cmon cmon)
Pixar: A Bug's Life, Toy Story 2, The Incredibles, Ratatouille, Up, Coco, Finding Nemo
Dreamworks: The Road To El Dorado, Shrek 2, Kung Fu Panda, How To Train Your Dragon, Megamind, Captain Underpants, The Bad Guys, The Wild Robot
Sony: Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs, The Pirates: Band of Misfits, Both Spider-Verse Movies,
Aardman: Chicken Run, Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit
Studio Ghibli: Grave of the Fireflies, Princess Mononoke, Spirited Away, Howl's Moving Castle
Laika: Coraline, ParaNorman, Kubo And The Two Strings
Individual Movies From Many Different Studios: The Triplets Of Belleville, Perfect Blue, Akira, Tekkonkinkreet, Nocturna, Nine, The Book of Life, Nimona
#asks#iamblue15#these were all the ones I could think of that I really enjoyed and have good memories associated with em
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Fanfic Writers Appreciation Day
This year I participated in @renegadeguild's Renegade Loves Fic (Writers) event for the first time, in which we celebrate Fanfic Writers Appreciation Day by binding two copies of a fanfic we love and sending one copy to the author.

I chose Florigenesis by @nientedal (and its sequel your roots send down to grow as an epilogue), which is a Megamind/Roxanne hanahaki story. Or, in the words of the author, "Less 'Hanahaki' and more 'mutually-requited pining with flowers thrown in for flavor.' " I loved the imagery of the flowers and had a lot of fun typesetting it with as many floral motifs as I could fit in it.
The flower Megamind ends up coughing up for Roxanne are dahlias, so I found some open-source images of dahlias sourced from books in the public domain to use as scene breaks and as a watermark behind the table of contents. Additionally, I used the font "Lime Blossom Caps" to use as a drop-cap at the beginning of each chapter. The text ended up being a bit more than 380 pages.
This is the first time I've done a book partially covered in paper instead of all in bookcloth. Before gluing the paper to the cover, I sealed it with homemade paste wax, which I think turned out really well. The book has a lovely feel to it--I'll definitely do some more partial-paper covered books in the future.
Also for the first time I sewed a headband on each book. It turned out fairly well. I used waxed linen thread as the core (the waxed thread that came with my bookbinding kit--its braided and so thick I can't imagine using it for sewing signatures).
Additionally, I got myself a chisel (and sharpening kit) to trim the edges, which turned out much better than expected. I still don't have something to hold the book horizontally while I trim so I'm still trimming vertically for now, but it turned out much better than trying to use a utility knife like I was before.
Technical Details:
Quarto size (quarter-letter, about A6)
Sewn-on made endpapers
Rounded but not backed
Sewn-on headbands (no tailbands)
Chisel-trimmed pages
Oxford hollow
The linen tapes are frayed and glued to the exterior of the boards
Sewn-on bookmark
Things I especially liked about this bind:
CHISEL TRIMMING! I knew it would up my game to have a chisel to trim pages with rather than just a utility knife, but WOW, it made SO MUCH difference! Once they were finished I kept petting the edges of the pages because they were just so soft and smooth and perfect.
I really like the sewn-in headbands. I'd probably use a bit thicker core next time, but they turned out well and I'm pleased with them.
I'm surprised how much I liked the paper-covered covers. I had planned on most of my books being full-bookcloth with this one as an exception, but with how much I like the look and feel of this book I will probably switch that around and do just quarter-bound with bookcloth unless I have a good reason to make an exception.
For the made endpapers, I glued just the edge of the endpaper to the white instead of the whole page. I quite like it--it's a lot more flexible this way and doesn't have a "noticeably glued-together" feel to it.
The wax paste turned out really well. It makes the cover feel very "finished" instead of just like scrapbook paper, which is what it actually is.
Things I'd like to improve for next time:
Because the text block is rounded but not backed, there's a little wrinkling of the endpaper glued to the board right at the hinge so it doesn't pull when the book is opened all the way. I'll have to experiment a bit more with this to figure out a good hinge for a rounded-not-backed book.
Although I love the flower cover, it's a little busy to have the title legible on the cover, so it's only on the spine. That's not a bad thing, but I'm not sure what I would do if I definitely did want a title/design on the cover itself.
I think honestly there's not very much to improve for next time. I'm very pleased with how this one came out--it's very nearly perfect.
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MY ASSESSMENT OF EP 1 OF MEGAMIND RULES! - MEGAMIND VS DUDE MONKEY
I'm going to be going through each episode of MEGAMIND RULES! to review them! Basically state my opinions and talk about how much I love Megamind and the things he does and stuff
Starting with episode 1, obviously.
S1 E1: Megamind vs Dude Monkey
I love the Megamind DreamWorks intro. I'm so happy we have one that was made specifically for him, at long last. It's perfect, too -- Megamind is the man (kid) on the moon, fishing for Chum. Brilliant! And the fact Megamind gets pulled down pahahaa
--
The theme is incredible, everyone knows it. I particularly love when Megamind throws the bags of money, we do a little spin around him, and then he kisses us. If I'd never seen him before, this would be the moment that I succumbed to his handsome-ry.
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"You've met your match, Evildoer! For I, Megamind, am the hero of Metrocity! And you will feel my… steely justice with the force of a… an angrly llama!" -- Megamind working on his new act. He's used to spouting villainy, this is hard! "I think you're improving, sir! That's way better than attacking their mothers personally!"
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"Villains, beware! For I am the White Knight of --" I assume he was going to say 'Metrocity'. I love the Batman references (The Dark Knight of Gotham). I am a huge Batman fan so to have Batman peppered throughout Megamind content is truly delighful.
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Dude Monkey reminds me of Ron from Kim Possible. Except horrible. HAHA the subtitles when Dude Monkey says "shall we stop another crime?" are actually "shall we SCHTOP--" which is exactly how he pronounces it, HAHA! That's hilarious.
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Megamind: What IS that thing?! (I love that he doesn't realize Dude Monkey is a person.)
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Dude Monkey is so annoyingly obnoxious! Megamind: What in Hades' hamper just happened?! (That's such a good exclamation.)
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Roxanne saying "I don't have actual control over the sun" feels like a Mr. Burns reference. Would that make Christina Christo Smithers? You know, I can see it.
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Megamind breaking through the window and innocently Ollo-ing only to get a monitor thrown at his face is pure gold. Roxanne really has a thing for throwing things at people, doesn't she? She did it to Music Man in the original film too HAHA! She calls it "muscle memory", I wonder if she means "back when you were Evil and I had to defend myself". But DID she really even defend herself physically from Megamind back then? Hmm… we really need more content from the old Evil days.
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Megamind likes tacos! Important! He also likes toquitos, chocolate milk, coffee, kombucha, and donuts, as I recall! Perhaps I missed something. If so, I'll find out soon enough (since I'm going to be going through the entire series again with Notice-Things Goggles on).
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Megamind @ Nighty-Knight: "If he pops his Halloween head up again, I have just the treat for his tricks!" These lines are TOO good.
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Megamind using the word "bombastic", PFFT! It fits right in with the others words often tied to him. "Mega", for example, and "Swag" (promotional items). "Uber" was also a popular word in the live-action script. I feel like all these words are a part of the same package. Also -- Bombastic apparently doesn't mean what it SOUNDS like it means. I was thinking "bomb" as in "amazing" and "tastic" as in "fantastic" but it's actually more of a negative term. I have a feeling Megamind didn't realize that either.
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"Why hire a second-rate wanna-be when you can have a first-rate is-a-be?" Oh my God, Brent and Alan, I know they're the ones coming up with these lines, they're hilarious. This episode is super funny, every one of Megamind's lines are pure gold. You can really tell how much effort they put into writing the characters, especially his.
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I love when Megamind nee-nah nee-nah nee-nah's Christina, maahahaha!
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"What about that icèd cream you promised?" It's interesting, in the subtitles it has a little dash over the e (è) to convey the pronounciation. "Primarily used in languages like French, Italian, Catalan, and others to represent a slightly open 'e' sound." Fascinating! I just watched an episode of the Simpsons where Mr. Burns refers to it as icèd cream, as well -- I do think the creators were inspired!
Oh, ice-cream! He likes ice-cream, as well!
Food Megamind Eats (will be copy+pasting this to other posts if he eats other stuff and I need to add to it): Tacos, toquitos, chocolate milk, coffee, kombucha, donuts, ice-cream
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"Time to get my blue bod ripped" pahahaha, I love that he can go from using the dialect of an elderly man from the 1920s to talking like a teenage boy who's been living in a frat house amongst his peers for the past 2 years.
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I love that Megamind thinks Dude Monkey looks up to him and is inspired by him -- seeing the world through rose-colored glasses, I love that about him. (Have I mentioned that I love things Megamind does yet?)
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"What's with this troll business? They've been extinct for decades!" I'm really curious if there are actual trolls in their world (wouldn't be far-fetched, there are aliens and shadow-people), or if Megamind just THINKS trolls existed in their world. If they did exist, I'm imagining it's something he learned when he was still on his home planet (maybe mom was telling him a bed-time story about the long-lost troll and then clarified that they are extinct once he expressed fear. I realize I'm totally making this all up but let's go with it).
Keiko really is a necessary addition to future (technically present) Megamind content, because Megamind himself has been so sheltered and secluded that he would have NO idea what's going on, ever. Her being there to assist him is pretty important!
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Hehe they used an edited version of one of my favorite promotional images of Megamind! "It's big for a reason!"
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"I went viral on Metrocity once! Gave everyone dance fever!" Hahaha I love that, it'd be great to see that. I hope the next theatrical Megamind movie is a prequel and we get to see more of Megamind and Metroman's battles, and get to see Machiavillain training him, and also get to see how Megamind met Roxanne! What a dream that would be! Also, giving everyone dance fever reminds me of Rachett and Clank with the Groovitron (a floating disco ball that, when thrown, plays disco music that mesmerizes anyone near it to dance uncontrollably until it expires)!
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Megamind's little dance when he "wins" the point-battle is great (I giffed that)!
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"Make me virulent on the onternet!" (Virulent: (of a disease or poison) extremely severe or harmful in its effects.) Hehehee
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Chum being entertained by a baby dancing just like a grown-up is pretty funny, given that's what baby Megamind was doing in some old commercials HAHA! Also, there was apparently a dancing baby meme back in 1996 that was/is really popular, I wonder if that's what they're referring to. I bet so!
youtube
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"Villains are red, heroes are blue. Stop robbing that bank, or feel my Kung Fu! Or, you know, I'll think of something later." I love that Megamind can seem egotistical at times, but he's actually quite self-conscious and self-questioning. He puts on the 'I'm the best' act to cover up his insecurities. I also think it was his way of giving himself what nobody else would (except Minion), considering he was looked down upon and was alone for so long!
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"Treading the boards" is a term that originated in the 1700s. The question we've all been asking -- IS Megamind geriatric? Technically, no, but he definitley does have a tendency to use out-dated terms/phrases. Which makes him all the more lovable! (I love Megamind, by the way)
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Megamind Before He's On Camera: Hello, my biggest fans! Megamind here!
Megamind Once He's On Camera: Hello, my biggest fans! Your little fannies will shake as you worship the splendor that is --
So real. You know how it is, when you're just existing, and then suddenly you're existing but on camera? It changes everything you ever knew about how to exist!!!
--
De-ep Freeze, De-Sintigrate, De-Gravity, De-Moralize, De-Lock, De-hydrate! Those were some of the features on his De-Gun that I was able to see! (I'll update this as we go, too.)
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Dude Monkey: Say "Megamind's Cheugy!" (That apparently means "something or someone out of date or trying too hard.")
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Megamind being obsessed with views, man I've been there! When you're trying to make a living off the onternet, and rely on views to make said-living, you get kinda obsessive! I love that Megamind puts his all into learning how to be up-to-date with slang terms haha! He really did learn quite a lot!
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"Only 100 views?! Why haven't I become a virus yet?!" He's so adorable. I would rewatch his stuff a THOUSAND times if I could! … Oh, wait, I do. (I imagine Megamind just coming into my room and being like "kinda creepy, but flattering…!")
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Megamind being scared that he's become "unpopular". That's interesting to think about, even when he was a villain, he was loathed, but he wasn't unpopular. They LOVED loathing him! He was Metrocity's Number One Supervillain!
--
Keiko then tries to help him, and he shuts her down! He decides to take matters into his own hands! He's too impatient to do as she requests and just wait it out! He's on his way to seek INSTANT gratification!
--
Oh my Gooodd, Dude Monkey is the wooorrrssstttt! And Christina is a bully! I have to assume she's cruel to Megamind out of jealousy, but jealous or not, that's my man she's bullying! Cut it out, woman! And I don't know why, but it's super funny to me when Megamind refers to her by name. "Heelarious, CHRISTINA!" I think it's so funny because they're acting like a couple of highschoolers who are fighting over the hunky football player.
--
Oh, this is the best part! Megamind trying out all the different disguises and personas haha! This is him using everything he learned whilst browsing the onternet!
"If this is the hero Metrocity wants me to be, THEN SO! SHALL! I! BE! IT!"
"Crimes a-poppin'! Daaang!" HAHAHA he's such a dork, I love him. "Scope that! Crime much, am I right?" HAHAHA "You'll LOL as I trick-shot these handcuffs right on Nighty-Knight's wrists!"
"Nah! Crime-stopping rocks!" "CRIME-A-DOODLE-DON'T!" (best line ever hahahaha)
Oohh, cowboy Megamind is delightful, he's been my phone background since this episode came out last year on March 1st (I can't believe it's almost been a year already, 2024 FLEW by)! BACKSLASH RAD!
--
So funny that Chum gets obsessed with memes hahaha, new special interest activated!
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"Imagine her telling me I don't know what I'm doing!" (-RECAP- Keiko really is a necessary addition, because Megamind himself has been so sheltered and secluded that he would have NO idea what's going on, ever. Her being there to assist him is pretty important! -END RECAP-)
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Roxanne: I need a 30 minute nap after eating three chicken wings! (Paahhaha)
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Another incredible line: "On my way to the hospital. My back is LOUSY with stab wounds." This is Megamind's way of calling Roxanne a back-stabber HAHAHA
I do love that Roxanne WANTED to pick Megamind though, and that it was just the city that preferred Dude Monkey. She agrees Dude Monkey is dumb! Yay! "Dumb-ocracy, am I right?" "You can't unspoil my sour mood with mayoral dad jokes, Roxi."
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"I posses super intelligence, otherworldly handsomeness, and selfless humility. Yet, I am felled by a bananalamadingdong." 1.) The first sentence has such "I decided to pick something a bit more humble; MEGAMIND! Incredibly handsome, criminal genius and master of all villainy!" vibes, 2.) HE'S EATING CHIPS! HE ALSO LIKES CHIPS! ADDING THAT TO THE LIST OF FOOD MEGAMIND EATS
Food Megamind eats: Tacos, toquitos, chocolate milk, coffee, kombucha, donuts, ice-cream, chips
There's also a Chinese food box, an applejuice box, and a soda cup on the floor! I wonder if that was from him or from Keiko? We later find out Keiko throws her garbage right on the floor of the Lair so I'm not sure! It wouldn't surprise me, though, if Megamind was the one to consume those things. He eats to comfort himself, as later episodes prove.
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Megamind truly fears people laughing at him! He really doesn't want to come off as a "bafoon" in any way. He prides himself on his Mega-Mindery, for a while that's all he felt he had going for him -- plus, I mean, his very NAME is based on how intelligent he is. He expresses fear at being laughed at in the original film, too -- being in his jammies in front of Roxanne terrifies him! Running away from the pieces of Metroman's statue after he blew it up "I hope no one's seeing this!" Also there was concept art of Megamind as a kid being laughed at by all the students at school because he dressed up as a superhero and wore a wig. MEAN! I think it's part of why he doesn't like being laughed at and does what he can to ensure he isn't. Trauma!
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Little Terry Sasko Says: I love that Megamind messes up just like me. In a weird way, that's inspiring. (So real)
This whole episode ties in really well with the original film, with Megamind wanting to be something he's not. He always has trouble with that; he wants to be perceived in a very specific way -- and that way is whatever gets him the most positive attention. My boy has trauma and he needs hugs (from Roxanne. Also kisses).
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It's kinda funny, but what Nighty-Knight's up to is obvious if you pay attention to HIM during his scenes earlier in the episode. I… was not paying attention to him, at all. Had no idea what he was doing. Too busy looking at Megamind. ALSO -- it's hilarious how Megamind is coming off as a genius as he explains his thought process, but it's more like everyone else is just dumb (looking at you, Chum). HAHA!
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Roxanne: Please give me good news, like a meteor is heading this way so I don't have to listen to this speech. (HAHAHA ROXANNE, she can have a dark sense of humor, it's great.)
I just heard Dude Monkey in the background saying "fish don't have lungs like humans do. They have gills!" (SHOCK AND AWE!!!)
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Nighty-Knighty: You dare talk confusingly to the Duke of Darkness?? (Nighty-Knight is by far my favorite member of the Doom Syndicate, he's hilarity shadowified.)
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Dude Monkey saying "we so do not have the budget for this!" when Nighty-Knight starts using his powers -- I bet the writers added that in there because it was an actual concern! I mean, really, can you imagine being given only a certain amount of money, and having to know what you can/can't do based on the amount you have? That sounds like it'd get really complicated. (I think that's why sometimes in movies, in one scene the CGI will be fantastic and in the next scene it'll be sub-par, more of the money went toward one scene than the other.)
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"Welcome to MEGAMIND'S RULES FOR DEFENDING YOUR CITY!" That's the name of his channel, apparently! That was also the title, or at least the working title, of this series when it was first announced!
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Dude Monkey and his friend remind me of the guys from "Dude, Where's My Car?"
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WOAH, I just realized Megamind said "Metro City" instead of "Metrocity" for the first time this ep! Ha! We do know he's capable of saying words correctly, he just tends not to, or forgets to. But when on camera, or when he knows he shouldn't, he changes it (such as right now, where he is on camera for his channel)! That happened in the original movie, too, where he's about to say "shool" to Roxanne as Bernaard, but quickly changes it to "school". It also happens in a later episode, when Megamind and Roxanne swap bodies. I think he categorizes things in his brain, and when one folder is open, the other is closed, so he is on and off with things depending on which folder is open. Kind of like he goes into modes. THIS Mega-mode doesn't say that, but the OTHER Mega-mode does.
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OH, more features on the De-Gun revealed! I know some new ones were added, or some were replaced, so I'm going at it as if it's a gun with new features. Meaning I'm not going based off what I know to be true about the De-Gun in the original film.
So now we have: De-ep Freeze, De-sintigrate, De-Gravity, De-Moralize, De-Lock, De-hydrate, De-stroy, De-bilitate.
(ignore that I focused on "de-bilitate" twice)
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Megamind after he freezes Nighty-Knight: Pretty chill, home boy! (HAHAHAA)
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crowd goes wild
Megamind: "Thank you, thank you! Oh, please no, you're too much! But it is fitting." (HEHEE)
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Chum making his own meme, and it's just a picture of Megamind with the words "Inspirational Hero ROFL"
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1.) Nighty-Knight looks cool without his armor. He's literally a shadow person.
2.) I love holographic-brain Machiavillain. It's fun that our introduction to the character was him as a holographic brain. It makes you wonder what he really looks like! I'll bet he was peeved at being a holographic brain when he's so obsessed with his hair.
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I'd say it's my 11th favorite episode! There are 16, so 11 of 16.
1 - Thrilling Conclusions 2 - Extra Credit 3 - A Cake for Keiko 4 - Villain City 5 - Who Wants to Save a City 6 - Game Over 7 - Mission: Machia Fest 8 - The Art of Destruction 9 - Blue Prison 10 - MegaMayor 11 - Megamind vs Dude Monkey 12 - Roach Hard: With a Vengeance 13- Hero for a Day 14 - The Villanous Origin of Mr. Donut 15 - Of Mice That Are Men 16 - Too Much Chum
#this took me literally over 5 hours#NOTICE MY WORK#megamind#megamind rules#megarox#roxanne ritchi#minion#chum#ol chum#chuminion#keiko morita#megamind vs dude monkey#my megamind rules! reviews#My Megamind Posts#megamind rules! screenshots
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Dating skz headcanons pt2
fluffy fluff
not proof read yet
Bangchan
You guys would play board or card games together,like monopoly.He would get a bit pissed when you win so he would resort to cheating."Chan you just can't just do that!","Do what?Your just mad cause im better",If your playing Uno he would secretly look at your cards then put down the card colour he knows you don't have.You get him back though and make him lose three in a row because that's what he deserved
Lee know
You guys would bully kidson roblox together,you would go on the voice chat games and just roast little kids😭,one of the little kids would be secretly one of the members(han)and you would just annoy and bully him so much to the point you could hear him get mad in the other room.When you hear him talk about someone bullying him on rolls you guys would just look at each other and smile while Han is whining about being bullied
Changbin
I feel like you guys would match with each other,intentionally and unintentionally.You guys would have matching bracelets,rings,shoes etc.One day you would wake up and feel like wearing a saniro onesie turns out that's exactly what Changbin was thinking.you guys would take so many pictures and post them.The captions would be like "I just unintentionally matched with my s/o,soulmates?yes."
Hyunjin
You guys would act out movies scenes together,you would be watching twilight and something cringe would happen so you just have to pause it and act the scene.The best one you guys would do is when Regina George got hit by the bus,especially because he's so good at being dramatic,you would be fully convinced he's a part-time actor"Your acting is so good you should be the next Zendaya", "I am zendaya"
Han
You and Han would try act like each other,you know those tiktoks like "acting like my sister for the day", that's what you guys do but more regularly.He would purposely exaggerate what you do,for the memes of course. "Han I do not act like that"," Are you sure?".But when it comes to you acting like him he would get all embarrassed," Stop,I don't talk like that", "Are you sure?" You say mimicking him from earlier
Felix
For each others birthdays,you guys do this thing where you make your own cakes for them(You have a backup just in case)You would do the funniest designs on the cake,the fans know about this because on his birthday live he explained it and said "so far they've been on a big foreheaded style,last year they have me pennywise,this year they gave me megamind"he would show the cakes to the fans and have a whole taste testing thing to see which came taste better,his normal cake or your cake
Seungmin
I feel like you guys would remind each other or embarrassing moments that happened,if you guys were play fighting (verbally)he would 100% be like "remember when you fell in front of the whole class after doing a presentation?" , "You can't even talk because you did horrible aegyo for the whole world to see",So you wanna be like that?" He would say then you guys would go back and forth about humiliating moments
Jeongin
You and Jeongin would have staring contests out of nowhere,You could be standing line for something and you spot Jeongin in the room instead of saving you just stars and him and it becomes a contest to see who can not blink for the longest,if he wins more than three times in a row he would flex it on you non-stop,he would have so much fun reminding you that you suck at staring contests but then quickly shut up when you win
#skz x yn#skz fluff#changbin x reader#hyunjin x reader#lee know x reader#stray kids fluff#felix x reader#han x reader#jeongin x reader#seungmin x reader#Bangchan x reader#skz imagines#skz headcanons#skz drabbles#stray kids x reader#stray kids imagines#stray kids scenarios
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