#....im not well rn idk
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me: im depressed and i have art block for drawing i guess i will try to write instead
the writing: bro this is just your own severe traumas portrayed through fictional characters you relate to & love at a distance
me:
#like ok i guess i will lie down until i am emotionally prepared lol hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#i kind of just dropped out of a lot of conversations and irl hangouts and i mean#im sorry honestly idek what to say#just kind of lost my marbles again tbh#for new followers of the Disco fandom i can describe it very accurately#imagine playing Harry at max skills 24/7#it's been this way for like 7 years for me#like the reason i connect with the game is because the inner monologue is so chaotic and distinctly fragmented to their own personalities#....im not well rn idk#i was better for a minute#i'll get back to it momentarily#it helped to play DE#maybe i just feel a bit lost now ive finished it
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happy halloween! 🎃🐈⬛👻🐇
#i just wanted to draw emu as a jiangshi .#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#emu otori#proseka#tsukasa tenma#nene kusanagi#rui kamishiro#wxs#wonderlands x showtime#polysho#enjoy halloween everynyan unfortunately i have to go work a shift. i thought abt dressing up for fun when i get back#but 1 im lazy 2 i dont live alone and its my luck that somebody ends up knocking when im in the middle of being dressed like a clown#so i would rather not risk it. idk how people get into cosplay just for photoshoots/videos i dont have that conviction .#but halloween con was lots of fun and i got to see friends and trade candy so i enjoyed my celebration already. ^_^#also STOP BEATING THE SHITNOUT OF ME IDEK IF I CAN BOOO BACK FROM A SIDE BLOG. YOURE KILLUNG ME#once again some random guy will be hittimg you back. boo#to end my tags i am going to be pissed off because i cannot draw well rn and its KILLING MEEEEEE#im art blocked as hell and mad about it. my zines....#its so annoying like with my personal art its whatever but people spend Money on zines i need to get good.#its been like over a week so i thought inwould be free. sigh#i often draw emu fiending off of tsukasa. the way things should be. amen#also inthink rui would love to go all out for costumes but he got busy modding a tshirt launcher to shoot candy and forgot abt his costume#so hes a tuxedo cat. he thinks hes so funny
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Just because you don't love yourself it doesn't mean I will stop loving you.
#my art#goro akechi#persona 5#shuake#p5r#ren amamiya#persona 5 royal#akeshu#for some reason i wrote a dif caption on all socmed#i like them all#u know me and my poetry and shuake i cant stop coming up w lines so oh well collect them all#twt tumblr and bsky#twt and tumblr are similar#oh right i have never told ppl i have either of those here#tumblr is my true home so i forget#anw enjoy my tablet pen is dying and replacement is 350 euros cause its a wacom display tablet from 2013-17 and yeah. fuck me :)#cant even say i will do comms to pay for a new one cause its maddening to draw on it rn#idk how i managed to draw this one - passion for shuake ig#ok thats too much rambling even for me oops#its been a bad week lots of expenses for someone who quit her job to do a post grad on my savings lol#im getting better though
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Just thinking about Dick freaking out over losing his title of best uncle to Jason.
Dick showing up to take Lian out and give Roy a break only to hear she's having a fun day with Jason
Dick walking into the room with the toy he knows Lian really wanted, only to find out Jason got it for her first.
Dick showing up to game night at Roy's only to find Jason already there.
Just Dick getting increasingly frustrated and his rival Jason having no clue well the the rest watch on in humor and exasperation. Roy finds the who thing hilarious.
Picturing it all coming to a head when Dick is babysitting Lian and she shows him a new photo they put up. Dick all dejectivly being like, "look, it's you and your favorite uncle."
The pure shock and joy he feels when Lian tells him he wrong and her favorite uncle is "you uncle Dickie, duh!"
The door opening and Lian shouting "Papa!" As dick turns to excitedly tell Roy what Lian said only to see it's Jason who's holding Lian.
Dick just bluescreening.
#dc#dick grayson#jason todd#roy harper#lian harper#batman#Roy being daddy and Jason is papa#Dick being oblivious to his baby bros relationship#nobody is gonna let Dick live this down#bright side is Dick still holds favorite Uncle title#Dick: I thought you were just really good friends#Jasons always there because he lives there half the time.#what's the point of having a rich Bruce if you can't abuse his money and tech to “work�� in Gotham well still living with his boyfriend.#dick cries when jason asks him to go with him to pick out a ring#dick cries again when Roy does the same#dick: omg im living in a Hallmark movie rn#part two: features the battle for Grayson. aka both want him as their best man.#i wish i could edit tags because my grammar seems to fail me whenever I write in them.#my posts#jason todd x roy harper#royjay#royjoy#idk
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can't stop thinking about cheerleaders in mcr again
the way they've been in so many of their music videos - I'm not okay, teenagers, blood - and photo shoots and represented things like the American dream and the 'popular' crowd and blind conformity and youth and a certain (male gaze-y) kind of femininity
the way you can turn on kerrang and be very likely to see a band of similar genre also using cheerleaders in their music videos but it being 70% up-skirt shots or love interests whereas mcr have never done that
the way mcr never made the cheerleaders or any female characters in their mv's a 'safe' or 'attractive' kind of weird but instead straight up weird allowing them to dance strangely and wear gas masks and be covered in blood and be rejected by getting poked in the eye or even completely ignored actively tarnishing the cheerleader persona
the way gerard way has now dressed up as one, siding with the cheerleaders after being separate from them for so long
as if the cheerleader is no longer just that but also the girl within the uniform, done being used as a symbol of the American dream and the 'popular' crowd and blind conformity and sexualised femininity unwillingly
the 'and so he gets to die a Saint but she will always be a whore' of it all
#am i making sense??#idk i wrote this all in one go because im crazy about this rn like omg#im sure this has been said in some capacity before as well but i cant shut upppp#btw when i say male gaze-y femininity i dont mean mcr projected that onto them i mean they were aware of this existing and chose the#cheerleaders as a symbol based on that#mcr#my chemical romance#gerard way
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🤫
#sasdie#Supercorp au#katie mcgrath#saskia de merindol#sadie mccarthy#melissa benoist#note: apparently the name of this ship is saskie but I'm letting y'all know im not tagging it like that but as sasdie#just with the purpose of finding the stuff here in my blog bc i fully gave up on tagging stuff here cuz it's useless theses days#also idk how to explain this but for me they're literally only a Supercorp au which is why im tagging that as well#I'm sick in bed rn and i might not be making any sense rn sorry for that#peace ✌🏼
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#my art#art#fanart#i love you tv y7 shows#am i “too old” to watch them? probably. don't care tho. peak is peak#fopanw#fairly odd parents a new wish#fop a new wish#hazel wells#fop anw#fairly oddparents a new wish#fopanw fanart#jasmine tran#fop hazel#idk if oddparents is one word or two. odd parents? oddparents? im too lazy to google it rn
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HES HERE HES HERE AAAA
#AAAAAAAA#art#fanart#drawing#digital art#shadow#sth#shadow the hedgehog#sonic 3#sonic movie 3#sonic the hedgehog 3#GUYS LOOK ITS SHADOW SHADOWS HERE#my art#sonic fanart#Sth fanart#shadow fanart#it released like 1am in AUS and I finished this like ?? at 9am w breaks because I have adhd lol#wowzer I shared recent art here bonkers#I have so much older art I need to share here still AAAA#I’m genuinely proud of this rn I just need to stop thinking about how well it’s going on insta because it’s going poorly pff#brain is stupid ‘well it’s not performing well it must of sucked’ NOOO :(((#the proportions aren’t amazing tbh BUT I RARELY DRAW HIM SO IM HAPPY IDKFJFJDJD#sonic the hedgehog 3 spoilers#sonic spoilers#sonic 3 spoilers#just in case idk#sonic 3 trailer
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(ID in alt) hi sorry for back to back marvel fanart I swear I still have dc stuff lmao. However I did recently read X-Men: first class and got a bit carried away doodling this after Lmao
#marvel comics#x men#scott summers#jean grey#hank mccoy#bobby drake#warren worthington iii#charles xavier#anyway#picked X-Men: First Class#out of sheer curiosity and desire to know more about the X-Men and I really enjoyed it!#Idk how in line with canon it but. Whatever tbh. Anyway that was the inspo behind this#just the og 5 fooling around and being silly teens#jean being the flirty one probably isn't very in character at this time period (jean doesnt really show any interest in scott in first clas#but it was too cute to pass up#also charles looks so much more pissed off than i intended 😭 there's this one issue of first class where he's just BERATING the xmen#just yelling at them psychically and eventually its revealed that it wasn't actually Charles but i didn't question it at first#which is kind of mean to charles. but idk i haven't gotten far with the x-men (im being very casual in my reading rn)#so maybe he deserves it#also i keep making bigger and bigger drawings bc i know that those print well#but i keeo forgetting that tumblr murders the quality of the image when you upload it. bwahhh#anyway i think i am finally going to knuckle down and open commission slots for part of july#idk how much a bad boy like this (lined coloured and shaded w/ multiple characters) would cost but we're gonna figure that out#honestly i might slightly under price them just to encourage ppl to spring for them#okay that's all for now I PROMISE I HAVE DC DRAWINGS TO SHARE i was just in a serious drawing funk and drawing some characters-#-that I'd never drawn before (like shulkie and now the xmen) helped break that funk!#mine
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My comic is so pretty...
The hiatus is letting me take a little extra time on these episodes, and I'm definitely putting it to good use!!!
#almost done with my 8th episode... which will give me. two weeks. of buffer...#id really like at LEAST a month... but to be more comfortable id like two#which means 2-6 more episodes before I come back!#I've got about 7 weeks so its possible. but i do still have to finish book 4#so much to do ..........#I decided for my next comic im doing 3 updates a month.#having 10 days instead of 7 to make an episode is such a huge huge huge difference...#difference in quality and in my health!#anyways the comic is really pretty im really happy with the work im doing rn#the environments especially. im getting to spend a nice amount of time on them and theyre turning out so nicely#its nice to be able to write with a lot of different environments and not have to redo panels when I get to them cause of time#cause every time theres a wild angle? you need a new background...#so sometimes. often actually. there just isnt the time to make the backgrounds for those and i have to make them more flat...#which is fine. it doesnt really affect anything narratively. but. idk. it's kinda sad right?#anyways yeah! 10 days will be much better.#36 episodes a year is about what ive been uploading with my hiatuses on the weekly schedule anyways!#so might as well cut out that super stressful middleman and just commit to that#52 a year is just such a huge difference and i have to accept its not possible to me#i will hurt myself trying to do that. and i want to make comics my whole life!#so i cant push myself that hard now and sacrifice my future. we're gonna go slower after this...#anyways yeah cant wait to come back but also time. if I could get an extra week like a secret one just for me#where theres no chores no nothin just me and my work#thatd be great! so go ahead and do what you gotta do to give me a little pocket dimension#me: ugh i want to return right now...#the more logical me: NO we need the time to finish everything!!!!!! NOT right now!!!!#time and time again#ttawebcomic#comic panels#hiatus stuff#adam and steve
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reposting some old doodles i still enjoy a bit
#a doodley#guys im having realizations i dont really know what to do with#ive said this tons before but my main issue with art rn is like#i Know anatomy. and what it's Meant to look like. my issue is straying away from Correct and going with Good like how some of my stuff was#before i really started learning. loose and not restricted#but my obstacle is that nobody draws the way i want to draw. and im bad at coming up with my own stuff...i need to copy and osmose off#someone else. well. it turns out there is someone who draws the way i draw. and its cheye of the past.#dont get me wrong if i look thru the rest of the art in the (year) folder these came from; 80% of it sucks#i wish i cld have what past cheye had but with current cheye tweaks and refinement#but idk how to do that. something weird has happened to my mind i really cant envision and make art the same way anymore#idk how he did it back then....i wish i Knew bc current me cant make anything out of sketching or thumbnails or just going at it#arghhh#i try and force myself to draw stuff like this now (interactions) and it looks. so stiff. and bad proportion wise but idk how to fix it#which isnt to say the proportions (for example) in THESE drawings are perfect but they dont scream Wrong or Bad or Incorrect to me ykwim...#idk! idk what to do with this. ive never known how to go back and study my own stuff
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girls when their issues get dismissed as anxiety for the millionth time
#futaba sakura#persona 5#p5r#p5#fanart#futabadoodles#chat i am SO losing it#went to get diagnosed w adhd wasnt diagnosed because and i quote “it could be anxiety” omfg#neurotypical psychiatrists especially white ones die in a hole 🥰#also because i “wasnt struggling enough”#like hi so i have this thing called emotional intelligence a good support system and access to coping skills hope that helps!#god forbid a neurodivergent person has tools to manage their condition and isnt in hell everyday i guess!#hate her ass!!!!!!!#i wasnt looking to get diagnosed for medication or support bc i already use a lot of like adhd specific supports and shit#and w accommodations my anxiety diagnosis can cover what i need for the most part so it was rlly just a validation/confirmation thing#like idk yeah. i am managing. im not particularly struggling. because ive been selfdx for a while and have implemented changes in my life#and i happen to be in a very very good place rn and im very lucky. so like. ???#rlly felt like “you have all the symptoms but youre not struggling enough with anything to be able to diagnose ypu” ok thanks fuck you#cuz ppl w adhd can manage being unmedicated by choice i js wasnt officially diagnosed before i guess its deemed “okay” to not live in hell!#dunno im frustrated. i have difficulties but i manage them well and i am very lucky to live an easy life for now so like 😭??
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wow Ace attorney doodles two days in a row?
yes 😔
I finished the first case of the second game and boy it was surprisingly queer
#ace attorney#The great ace attorney#Tgaa2#idk how y’all tag over here uh#Suasato Mikotoba#ryuunosuke naruhodou#susaori#i think at least idk#just wanted to get these out#trying to practice digital more for no reason genuinely#it dose make it easier to instantly post things#screw getting my sketches scanned#Just sketch on Ipad in multiple layers then delete#boom#easy#digital art#im in a classic i dont care if my art is bad phase run#rn#and its going pretty well honestly#im just gettin shit done it’s pretty nice#hopefuly over my break i can work digitally and get some bomb ass fan art#because my brain is in AA rott for no reason#i genuenly have no clue where it came from#like a switch#‘you like ace attorney a lot again’#but TGAA is honestly really fun so im stoked it happened#anyway im done#see y’all tomorrow probably lmao#susarei
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this is fanart for my jellycat bunny flopsy. its her year
#mine#original#shes not brown shes like. greyish. but brown worked 4 th palette so SDKFBS#i still CANT SEND. orders. im biting things so hard :(((((#im gna do a lil valentines post soon...but pls b aware idk when i will be able to send things internationally!!#its so sad.....n im getting a lot less orders as well ouughghghsghgshghsghsgs#if u want a print n dont mind waiting for it to arrive skjfskd pls order! i could do w th money rn!!#we hvnt had th heating on th house is. 9 DEGREES. okaokaokakaokooa
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hard experimenting with my artstyle feat. an attempt at making chuuya look more realistic
#trying to make my stuff look more porcelain-like ig as well although idk if im achieving it 😭#this was more of a style test for a zine cover although idk if im going to go with it ehh#ok im procrastinating really hard rn i need to go work#chuuya#chuuya nakahara#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#bungou stray dogs fanart#bsd art#bungo stray dogs fanart#nakahara chuuya#kokoart
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wanted: marine hunter takanome mihawk
#shanks: oh i want him alright#dracule mihawk#takanome mihawk#one piece#one piece fanart#op fanart#i accidentally went way extra on this than i intended to 💀 i got bored waiting for my brother + my phone was charging#it was just supposed to be a b&w sketch with his eyes yellow or red but it got out of hand when i was like 'maybe i'll do skin for funsies'#ah well. im really starting to get into painting with this one brush. one day i'll merge it with the style i use more#cuz rn i tend to break out the painting only when i wamt smth a liiiiittle👌 more realistic.#i stress that 'little' bc calling my style 'realistic' in any sort of way feels inaccurate lol#i digress#i love imagining marine hunter mihawk being some teenage punk between the ages of 17 and 23#idk when he became a warlord but if he had this epithet even before roger's death that would put him in mid-to-late teens#since at roger's execution he was 19 amd already had yoru#so it's kinda funny to imagine the marines being hunted by some teenager with dramatic sideburns and an even more dramatic sword#last post of the year! :)#i had no chill this month. pls dont expect anything on my blog again till march lol.#(im half-serious; im going on vacation for all of february and i have some prior pieces i need to focus on in jan haha. we'll see tho!)
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