#.. im interested in how your mind works
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caterina: i have made the Perfect Assassin
rook: you fucked up a perfectly good househusband is what you did. look at him. he’s got anxiety
#if caterina has no haters im dead#i know lucanis still loves her and i respect that but that does NOT mean i have to!!!!!#i have a lot of thoughts about her and how their dynamics fit into like. The Way Italian Families Work#she���s such an interesting and tragic character when you dig into Why she’s like that#but first and foremost i am a hater. how dare you do all that to your boys. killing her in my mind#datv#dragon age the veilguard#dragon age#lucanis dellamorte#caterina dellamorte#rookanis#lucanis x rook
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since tumblr always has to suffer my personal vents and breakdowns and rants and annoyances you get the most wips and pics of unfinished stuff, im sure that makes up for it
the (unfinished) shiekah arm concepts that made me want to explode and i dont think im gonna work on again
#ganondoodles#art#zelda#ganondoodles rewrites totk#botw2#wip#calling it wip but i dont think i can go back to it#i tried to keep going on this for so long bc i have had the idea in mind for so long and it seemed fun#well ...... turns out that was a lie#thought to myself maybe i can do like one of those cool concept art things where they just go for interesting shapes first#and then refine it to actually work#but im not made for it#tbh im not sure what im made for#(i dont think posting wips im not posting elsewhere actually makes up for my annoying mental health spirals..)#i hope its not too small#was intending to go for version H but only got to do one variation#the outer casing can be customized with several designs#theres a guardian arm that extends and stretches to form the hookshot in the bulky part as well as the stored magic#there is always something on it to glow bc it also subtly shows how low your magic meter is#and if it runs out the blue parts turn orange like other shiekah tech in stand by mode#wanted to draw all that on here too#but .... ill need to start over when im doing better ....... WHEN im doing better and can draw again#speaking it into existence#(....man how all those “designs” look is so ... i feel even stupider for getting so extremely frustrated over it ...)
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reblog this w the entity/entities you most align yourself with & why
#im curious to know whats most common#and the reasons behind certain ones#can't imagine people willingly aligning themselves with the flesh for example#so if you do#.. im interested in how your mind works#tma#tmagp#the magnus archives#the magnus protocol#smirke's fourteen#smirkes 14#tma entities#helix speaks#for me personally its obviously the spiral#mainly cuz i got a lot of Brain problems#that mess w my perception#also a history of hallucinations#and its nice to blame them on me being just a little spooky 🤪#cuz attributing them to their actual cause#is a Bummer
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Every now and again I think about Jon having dissociative identity disorder and I think that just needs to happen. Please he has the childhood trauma for it (Im not talking about Mr Spider I mean his grandmother and parents deaths). I fucking need this. For me specifically and noone else
#I THINK ABOUT THIS ONCE A WEEK AND THEN GO INSANE#open your mind to the possibilities people#i dont even think it would change the story much but i consistently think about how did would work in specific settings#LIKE#IF YOU HAD A SUPER POWER#HOW WOULD DIFFERENT ALTERS USE IT#ITS SO INTERESTING TO THINK ABOUT GOD#anyways. ill be normal now (im not)#tma#the magnus archives#jon sims#jonathan sims#jon tma#garlic breath
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Alright hear me out guys...self ships. WITHIN your self ships. Assuming the media you're shipping in is/has an equivalent in the universe
Arthur is basically in a more magical version of the real world where Santa exists so THAT means that Star Wars also exists as a media franchise 0//0 all I'm saying is even as my boyfriend Arthur would be very sweet and supportive if I told him about Brea and Rex and he'd love to hear me infodump about star wars for HOURS (just as I'd let him infodump about Christmas for hours) and I think he'd especially be attached to Kepler and be really sad about uh. What happens to him.
#jane journals#self insert talk#💙 oh captain my captain 💙#🎄 my christmas wish 🎄#THIS IS LOWKEY HOW IM TRYING NOT TO LET STAR WARS BRAINROT TAKE OVER#cause im not ready to let go of arthur and when sw takes hold nothing else may as well exist#but i love the idea of sharing my interests with him as much as he shares his with me!!#and he'd understand why im losing my mind over this song sjfkgk#how about yall?? do you have self ships that can theoretically work within your self ships?#u think ur f/o would have self ships?
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i know astrology is fake but i'm not too keen on how a lot of people on this website seem to be clowning on it as a hobby a bit too hard. i swear the woman who thinks it's neat how she and her friends with the same sun sign are all similar isn't trying to say that you are who you are born as and there is nothing you can do to change it. it's a hobby. an interest. what happened to finding meaning and joy in the small things. does it affect you if someone enjoys tarot reading or crystals. does it make you upset someone has interests that they enjoy.
#im not saying astrology/tarot/crystals/etc. get clowned on so much bc theyre hobbies mostly enjoyed by women But....#i saw a post about some astrology study and made the mistake of opening the notes on that bad boy#not fun. and that reminded me of that old post that was basically like ''liking astrology is transphobic''#anyways idk maybe its just that my bestie is very much a ''crystal girl'' but like. stuff like that are such neat hobbies#she makes some cute little jars with pretty rocks and they make her feel better bc if you believe in something you can make it happen#when it comes to small things#like yeah if you pick up a stone that's like ''this can help you be more open with your emotions'' and you are like ''oh hell yea!''#ofc that will be on your mind and the item will be a constant reminder and actually help you with your goals#and its like. ok what really stuck with me was when i was talking with my bff and i was like ''i think all this stuff is interesting but i#feel bad bc i am superstitious and believe in some signs like lucky numbers but i know that logically its just. if i pick a lucky number of#i pay extra attention to it but i want to believe its lucky but i know how human brains work in that aspect''#and she was just like. ''so? those things dont have to exclude each other'' and it clicked#if i have a little tigers eye with me it does not make me feel more grounded magically#but if i decide (or believe) it's grounding then it will b bc it's a reminder for me to calm down#and stuff#like. ah idk how to put my thoughts into words#but i just think its unfair that a few rotten apples have ruined the perception of fun hobbies for a lot#not every astrology enjoyer is trying to sell you mlm essential oils or genuinely believe peoples entire lives are dictated upon the stars#or something#idk i just feel like these things are v misunderstood even tho im not personally like super into them myself#but ppl super mean about that stuff arent invited to look at my medieval themed fortune telling cards#idkk im sleepy and cant articulate my points someone else say this but better#leevi talks#im just saying. i dont think its bioessentialism to decide to believe you personally have a season for growth when the stars are in a#certain position or whatever
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sometimes i think about daigo interacting with the mundane and thinking about mine and i throw up a little bit ngl
#snap chats#yk what i mean. By Design the first thought that should come to mind with mine is money and expensive things#but instead of seeing expensive watches or flashy cars and thinking of mine i hope daigo thinks about how he liked his coffee#maybe daigo sees an interesting piece of art and wonders what mine wouldve thought of it#maybe daigo tries to read a little more on his downtime- what if mine always had a book on his desk when he'd visit#does daigo listen to classical music more nowadays ? maybe he stares at pianos a little too long now when he spots them#just. remembering the human aspects of mine instead of him being just a piggy bank#it's easy to do when he was/is also in a position where he was only valued for his money or authority/relation to authority#he's haunted! allegedly. in my opinion. haunted by anything and everything that reminds him of him#theres a time and place to be haunted but work hours is not it. until a mfer come into your room and be like#'lol remember that clan.that went under after its patriarch killed himself' and then you have fight the demons not to kill someone#anyway. im gonna sit on a fic of this for nine years while i work good bye everyone#i love it when daigos haunted its so rude#i try not to imagine daigo as solely a grieving widow for until the end of time. however he can have his moments#i think he's allowed to be melancholy about losing his ''''''''best friend''''''' sometimes
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okay. hello guys. my bad for not responding to stuff or being as active recently, had a lot of work to be done and other stuff to focus on that took a lot of my time. I wanted to make more art, but I unfortunately had to put that energy into other things (which got to the point where I could not put them off any longer and had to stay working on it). I know I missed a lot of stuff and I'm sorry for it
#unfortunately there are moments where i am forced back into reality#and i remember that i cannot actually spend my life creating and hiding away forever!!! crazy#honestly a lot of it has also been the fact that i am just tired everytime i get home#and my health issues that have been steadily building up#they're really catching up on me and ive been having to visit the clinic more than im happy with#theres just a constant sense of fatigue nowadays#also uh#admittedly my interesting in Alien Stage has been waning#not replaced by any other media in particular. just started focusing on irl life stuff more often#which is why i barely post on shakingparadigm anymore/dont really post anything of substance#its really mostly this alnst oc thing that makes me want to stay because i genuinely enjoy and adore what we've created here#im pretty invested in this even though im not as invested in the source material anymore#not to say i dont like alnst anymore! i still do. i just don't dedicate all my attention to it anymore#which is for the best actually. because admittedly the things and time i have sacrificed for alnst did create a few consequences#sometimes i forget how bad a hyperfixation can fuck me up#again I'm really sorry for everything I've missed#and for being late to apris birthday#and the solauri round#and more#amazing stuff that you guys have made#me bones just dont work like they used to i fear. please give me time#im.sorry again#sorry this post might seem kind of depressing#just dont mind it if you want#thanks for your time#misc#rant#(?)#vent
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really wish my one friend would quit flirting with me. and trying to goad me into hanging out more. and assigning us fictional characters that are oh-so-coincidently either couples or with romantic tension. and then interrupting our gameplay to ask me repeatedly if I think they’re “like us” (which they rarely are…). and matching my icon on discord without asking (again, usually by insinuating a couple connection). and giving me random things I do not want and did not ask to receive (and then forcing me to take them???).
#storyrambles#it’s not creepy. just for context. it’s just irritating because I’ve told this person repeatedly that I’m not interested in romance.#this person is also naturally a huge romantic so it is next to impossible to tell whether it’s actual flirtation or just flirting for fun#flirting for fun is cool. I wouldn’t mind that. but if I do it once this person will take that as an invitation to do it an excessive amoun#but yeah after being given 12 roses out of the blue when I said ‘no don’t buy me flowers’. there’s only so many things that can mean#‘it’s nice to see your face you always cover it!’ …I’m masking. because of covid#I’m narrating a game and suddenly ‘I like hearing your voice I should call you every day so I can hear it for 10 minutes’. …no.#‘you have to take the snack I brought you know it’s rude to refuse a gift’ I have never refused a gift. It is rude. But also I didn’t ask.#‘you know this game is one you can play without talking so we can play more often!’ we already play games once a week for usually 3 hours.#‘but it’s not talking so it’s less social energy’ no. that is not how it works.#sorry for the rant im just. tired.#you know those people who are so pleasant to hang out with and then they try way too hard#and that’s actually what makes things awkward? rather than when they’re just being themselves?#yeah. that’s this friend here.#usually I go along with the bit but when I can never tell when the bit is actually a bit#and you insist on me taking on the ‘girl role’ for most of them#I am not going to play along.#UGH don’t get me started on the ‘you’re cute when you’re flustered’#I wasn’t even flustered. I was trying to do mental math while running on four hours of sleep and he was staring directly at me#it’s uncomfortable.#also. I never want to hear that again. fuck. ‘you’re cute when you’re angry’ ‘you’re cute when you’re upset’ ALL THE FUCKING TIME AS A KID#will I be so cute after I kick you in the nuts? will I?#(for clarity I don’t want to kick him. I want to kick those other people.)#I need a lot of alone time. I really do. I can do 3 hours and then I will be drained for the rest of the day.#‘how did you grow up? did you not talk to your mom for more than 3 hours a day?’#first of all. that’s different?#secondly we actually regularly do separate things without talking to each other. or go in separate rooms to take some time to ourselves#also I don’t have to be on high alert for if I’m going to be flirted with. so.#ugh. I like him as a friend. I really do. I know this all makes it seem like the opposite. I try so hard to be as nice as possible.#but UGHHHHHH
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heyo spinny!! whats some of your favourite tlg ships? or just any you like in general
EHEHEHE rubbing my hands together. evilly. hehehe
well, kiburi is my pathetic wet cat blorbo and i happen to love all the crackships for him. kiburi x makuu? funny as fuck. kiburi x ushari? love them in nikki's pirate au they keep me up at night. kiburi x janja? the outlands brotp ever. my favourite character's stupid ships my beloved yknow?
in terms of other ships: reirei x goigoi obviously. baobabfruit ofc (thanks to you :] /pos). jasiri x kion because yeah. and as you could never tell (/sarc) i love poly ships so banzai x shenzi x ed, tano x nne x madoa, & kiara x tiifu x zuri are ones i really enjoy too. oh and i'll say timon x pumbaa too since they were my first tlk ship i suppose :]
#it's funny bc. sometimes i think about crackships more than my actual ships#like i got an ask about tamka x nduli and i kept thinking about it. in a /pos way#probably because im open minded to ships and i can see them in a queerplatonic light yknow#idk how to explain it. the best example might be through kiburi#in canon i see him as aroace. but i also enjoy various ships for him and all of those would be in aus#alternatively i could see him being in a qpr. but its kiburi so whoever he was with would have to be really right for him lmao#i like kiburi x ushari for that reason. if you put them in the right setting they just Work. for me#something something everyone has their own view of ships and how characters work with each other#therefore i will never be a ship hater. unless its fucking proship or whatever obviously#sail your ships! if i enjoy em i'll happily hop on board otherwise they can float on by it doesn't bother me#another ramble. i used to enjoy kion x ono a lot#it stemmed from way back when i first watched the show and ono was my favourite#i think i saw them both as demiromantic so they just. worked. to me#nowadays i favour ono x beshte x bunga so there we go#used to have a lot of janja ships back in the day too#idk man the world of shipping is interesting to me#and i ship a lot of stuff :] and im happy about it#endlessly rambles at u in tags hfgdjjdhdhd#thanks for askin :D#asks!!#the lion guard thoughts#the lion guard#tlg#mutuals
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Not only have several of my former classmates gotten married, just found out that now one is having a kid?? 😭😭 just reiterating: i cant believe some people my age are doing that dklsldls. Where do they find time to work/study AND develop intricate crown prince rudolf headcanons once they do that
#married people and parents still have hobbies yadda yadda. you dont need to tell me that kslsld its a joke#its interesting how strong an emotional reaction of Otherness i have to these types of news dkkdld. like its always 'good for them but i#dont think i could ever want this'#i mean im not opposed to gay marriage in my future depending on how life plays out but i would not want to do it to 'settle down' i think#dont necessarily want a big house a garden a golden retriever or a car 😭#and def no kids#i guess its partly a reaction to kind of.... idk at a younger age more people are more 'restless' like me and then many change their minds#so its invalidating to be 'left alone' when you used to have allies who could relate to your life choices/wishes haha#i think being gay complicates this... i used to think it was a blessing for making it less of an expectation but actually turns out soooo#many girls on dating apps and online have or really want kids 😭 and i'm just like. good for you but this doesnt work for me#ugh anyway yeah. you guys better still be following me for rudolf posting when i'm 45 with a mortgage and an evil day job x#xD#you can take time off from your spouse and kids to log onto tumblr com and look at this shit 🥰🥰 for md ☺️#me*
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so i just left my local library because of course my printer decides to literally die on me while im trying to apply for a new job🙄
anyways.
while i was in there i had only one thought.
i want need to write a fic where an older Eddie has his own library and a younger Buck is always in that library for his schooling/researching needs.
i have some ideas playing in my head already that i’m gonna map out, but if you are interested in this and wanna throw in whatever suggestions or scenarios you can think of in my asks, please do!!! i will give you credit when/if i post this but this is something i really wanna play around with!
#i’ve been loving older and younger fics lately#doesn’t matter who’s older or younger#but younger buck for this idea works better in my head#please give me your ideas!!!#i’m very interested to see how others hears my idea and where their mind goes with it!#i have no time to be writing right now but damn if i don’t thoroughly#plan out this fic#IM ALREADY IN LOVE WITH THE VISION#so please#please help lol#eddie diaz#evan buckley#911 on abc#911 buddie#buck and eddie#oliver stark#ryan guzman#911 abc#ao3 911
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I originally planned on doing a quick series with a y/n that would've been Gale Weathers and Dewey's child and had Tara as a love interest sometime in the near future but considering Spyglass/Scream 7 production company both fired Melissa Barrera (Sam Carpenter) for calling for a ceasefire and refused to pay Neve Campbell what she deserved (plus Jenna Ortega dropped out due to schedule conflicts), I won't be doing another series for Scream. I hope nobody's disappointed by this <3
#bumbletalks#scream franchise#how are you not gonna rightfully pay the literal face of your franchise#and painting melissa as a bad person for saying genocide is bad???#ugh hollywood#in other news ill be working toward getting midnight beach out of sight and mind#once midnight beach is over (which i wont be continuing it into the new season as ive lost interest for the show) ill get to tlou#and i promise#i will do the sansa fic im almost through s5 of GoT#afterward yall might get a the last kingdom fic who knows
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save me old flipnote studio MVs.......
#im going thru old flipnotes i used to watch years ago and ouggghhg so many good ones#is twenty one pilots still popular.... do people still remember the TRNDSTTER and marble soda meme.........#its like im unlocking some sort of primal part of my brain and everything is coming back to me. one of my biggest inspirations as a kid#i still remember thinking the final transmission lyrics were the coolest thing and watching =TopHat= Bee and Melissa over and over#theres a very specific feeling of longing and nostalgia looking back and watching these again years later#especially when there isnt anything genshin or mcyt and instead its either fnaf undertale eddsworld or another obscure#interest... and not even fnaf sister location its like fnaf 3 and 2. its THAT old. and a lot of oc MVs especially pokemon ocs and furries..#god but they were so creative u know. i still find it amazing ppl took this little lightbox animation on the fucking NINTENDO DS and#cranked it all the way to 11.. like if u look at the transitions and movement its so fucking fluid its insane..!! HOW DO YOU MAKE THE#CHARACTERS SPIN??? AND CHANGING CAMERA ANGLES??? and keep in mind youre doing this all with a shitty stylus#on a THREE BY TWO INCH SCREEN. you only get two layers you can go up to 29FPS and you only have 999 slides to work with#and 24FPS eats up a lot of that. absolutely insane it literally boggles my mind every time i think about it. AND SOME ARE EVEN FULL COLOR#i forgot how popular EDM was back then too...they were really good for timing beats though so you get a lot of MVs with#strobe last and marble soda. porter robinsons goodbye to a world was also popular with undertale and oc MVs. also a lot of vocaloid#someone made a flipnote abt the warner bros fnaf movie being announced EIGHT FUCKING YEARS AGO. it even used the stay calm audio from#the office.... i wonder how theyre doing now... i love you shitty grainy MV audio.. but i have mixed feelings abt the flashing colors#ppl LOVED animating the sans vs frisk fight. aishite and primadonna were also big ones they were SICK AS FUCK#lots of these inspired my old oc designs.. a lot of my characters had side bangs with one eye covered. animal ears and simple eyes too#now i kinda wanna try my hand at the marble soda meme cause i loved it as a kid lol.. i wonder if i should compare my old and new art here#UGHHHH IM SO NORMAL ABOUT NOSTALGIA. IM SO NORMAL ABT MY SCHOOL BOOK DRAWINGS WITH SHIBA BROWS#yapping#nostalgia
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arlecchino's official title is "father" when house of hearth members refer to her ......... please just one chance please please
#GOD. me when slightly more masc women#idk i really hope they keep that just bc it would be so nice to have some more canonical gender fuckery as little as it is#i hope they write her well because MAN she's been so interesting so far#. kind to kids; who also end up becoming essentially child soldiers; 'has her own agenda' according to childe..#thinking back to my own post abt her and house of hearth: seems like she really does care abt the kids in her org (or acts like it well eno#enough . but ahskdjksfjl she could ofc be another person who knows how bargaining and equivalent exchange works. like. save your life for#a debt. win loyalty via small favors that are actually nice things and things she doesn't mind doing etc#think how bai.zhu operates but a lot more ethically questionable#please please let her be a well rounded evil. her design is already so cool (minus the long rat tail ponytail thing :\)#chewing on her and her motivations and backstory for enrichment#genshin spoilers#4.0 spoilers#fontaine spoilers#arlecchino#i hope! they make her self aware enough to know she's doing evil. or not evil but not morally great things . and i sure hope they don't#write it off as 'this for that. food/shelter for doing 'jobs' for me' when the job is literally . murder and spying and all sorts of other#stuff. or ig she can justify it like that but IDK all im asking is that she doesn't get the shogun treatment#teyvat thoughts#ramblings!
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Reading dense book after years of not doing that, explained everything about my academic experience
#perspective yeah bro#i'm audio learner but with good unoptimized visual memory#unbalanced build. kinda fucked up. need a refund.#what good is remembering the block shapes of text? particular spacing? lettering? or zoomed in specific word out of context#thanks brain thats what i was reading for#there could've been a diagram there but nooo#on audio you have to focus and its more obv to me when i zone out - more effective with snapping back but harder to remember#oh you tired? no focus for you#what they dont teach you is how to process and deliver that info to yourself - the learning#or how to get yourself interested#throwing info like a meat into inclosure for a decade wow. teach me how to hunt you cunts#maybe somewhere/now they do#you have to invent makeshift shitty systems with your child mind that's never examined closely as long as they work#and how will you know when it doesnt work or that you have to replace it? without paying attention you might not#imo school needed to be heavily revamped once internet happened from the ground up#great awesome discoveries are happening#im reading but im angry
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