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#-so i think the way it works out in game is that theres certain days supplies can be ordered and you have to pay for it but the items can be
puppyeared · 2 months
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learning abt friendship decay and "not reaching out to your friends for months at a time unprompted is not neurotypical behaviour" has me feeling a certain way
#experiencing some BIG FEELINGS OVER THIS REVELATION#listen i have never ever been bothered abt not seeing someone in a while or making time to talk to them bc in my mind its like not thst muc#time has passed. i mean it with every fibre of my being that when im like 'oh its ok even though we havent talked in a while and have our#own things going on it doesnt mean we're not friends anymore since we left things on a good note 8 months ago' i sincerely believe that#and for the longest time i just thought everybody makes peace with it at some point and not automatically assuming the other person doesnt#wanna talk to me anymore or smth. my longest lasting friendships are with ppl who work the same way i just thouhght that was normal#whatever organ everybody has that makes them reach out to their friends and plan hang outs i probably dont have it#i was already hesitant to ask out Alex bc i spend almost every waking hour doing smth that isnt talking to ppl unless they happen to be in#the vicinity. and at first it was bc i planned on making sure i had everything set up so i dont get stressed out and do it one at a time#but then i find out theres a friendship decay mechanic? and after dating and marrying someone you lose -10 friendship points for every#day u dont talk to them?? actually ive probably been losing friendship points this whole time without knowing bc of this?????#and i notice a lot of my own habits are also reflected in how i play bc ive been avoiding getting close to pierre and marnie since its more#of a professional relationship. like i know theyre npcs but im approaching it the way i would in real life its fucking nuts#i think its a little relieving im playing /as/ a character than myself bc as im playing im just making up little interactions in my head#than approaching things the way i would myself so it takes a bit of the stress off trying to put myself in there as a spectator. but well#being in a relationship demands a certain amount of energy even more so when theyre things that already take up energy on its own#like making time to talk to your partner and make sure they know theyre loved. i dont always have energy to put all my mental focus into it#and this is true for real life so im not really bothered by not dating anyone. but when its a game and i want my character to be with someo#and i know its fully optional and i know i could just apply the same logic to this i dont /want/ to. sometimes i want to experience#the same things other people do at least to a certain degree without the same emotional andmental stakes#no offense krobus#yapping#stardew#stardew valley#puppy plays sdv#sdv#this game has me by the ankles man
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sidesteppostinghours · 17 hours
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pulps law is that whenever i get insane enough about something, i will inevitably attempt to make a persona 5 au, regardless of whether or not i am successful at it.
#anyways guys youre never going to guess what au ive been thinking of lately .#i know the correct way to go about this is make sidestep the main character but you see#i will not be doing that. and actually in fact i will not be following the storyline of persona 5 in the slightest. because lol#but morgana exists in this au purely because i dont think the others would survive without him explaining what the metaverse is 💀#the rangers are a team of detective for the public sector in this au#and dr mortum is an unassuming everyday scientist that should not peak the rangers interest in any way. at all#in the video game that exists in my head the player can pick between playing julia or ricardo#it doesnt change the storyline that much but it does make the character relationships funky so#in my head chen is best friends with julia and argent is best friends with ricardo#chen and ortega stumble into the metaverse together so if you pick julia its two best friends in a life or death situation#but if you pick ricardo its your sisters best friend+kinda your boss in a life or death situation which personally i find extremely funny#regardless of which ortega you play with the other one doesnt know about the metaverse until id say like. the end of the first palace? beca-#use thats when they start getting suspicious#and because this is ortega they follow them and find out about the metaverse that way#i dont think they become a phantom thief but i think they do end up covering the others asses irl#dr mortum still isnt actually a doctor but i think theyre the one providing medicine to them at the start of the game#theyre extremely wary of the rangers at the start and ortega can barely convince them to sell them things which they still charge-#-extremely high over. i think the turning point comes when they discover the metaverse because holy fuck they are So excited about it#both because of the implications and what the metaverse could be used For#chen is not thrilled about letting them know this but theyre kind of their supplier so its not like he can argue#i think mortum joins the phantom thieves eventually but as a navi#obviously its in their best interest to provide everything for free now that theyre part of the team but they still have to order supplies-#-so i think the way it works out in game is that theres certain days supplies can be ordered and you have to pay for it but the items can be#-picked up at any day of the week#but also i have no idea how that would work practically (its all in my head anyway so it doesnt actually matter but yk)#theres still more thoughts about this but im ✨running out of tags✨ and also i cannot organize my thoughts enough to explain it#pulp speaks#im not main tagging this its going to be my silly self indulgent au for eternity ok
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lightfeltmemories · 6 months
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dungeon meshi | delicious in dungeon; reactions to reader having a crush on them / having a crush on reader
dungeon meshi various x gender neutral reader
note: hey everyone, please be mindful that this is the very first time writing for these characters, i have watched every available episode but i am still reading the manga (though i do have a general idea about the setting and the characters backstories and personalities) so if any characters are ooc to you my apologies, don't be harsh im new here lol. sorry some of them are shorter than others i kind of ran out of ideas when it came to certain characters :p let me know in the comments or reblogs or more preferably in my ask box if you want me to do any other character.
characters: laois, falin, chilchuck, marcille, senshi, namari, shuro, izutsumi (i'm adding her here because feels weird leaving her out when i've added former members of the party, also this is purely sfw so nothing weird will be aimed towards her.)
trigger warnings: nothing out of the ordinary but just read the manga or watch the anime before reading this.
if you like this and my other fanfics, please be considerate to reblog my work, it not only helps reach a broader audience but it also motivates me to make more content like this!
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laois touden
reader's crush: when laois finds out that you have a crush on him, his reaction is.. well, how do we put it this way? is he flattered? yes and no, he doesn't see himself as ugly but also doesn't look at himself as the most handsome guy in the world, but someone straight up having a crush on him is kind of new, he doesn't really care much for relationships at the very moment but has thought about settling down with someone he likes, will it be you?
laois' crush: when it comes to having a crush, he tries to be his normal self around you, but sometimes can't help but be a little nervous especially when the two of you are alone, sooner or later he comes to the conclusion of realizing the he indeed, likes you, but confessing is the hard part, he's never thought much about rejection, it is a normal part of life after all, but when it comes to you? it's an entirely different ball game.
falin touden
reader's crush: falin already has someone chasing after her; shuro, theres a 50/50 chance of her reaction to reader's crush being the same as shuro's, but could there be a different reaction this time?
falin's reaction: surprisingly less shy than her brother, when she comes to this conclusion she'll build up the right time to actually confess, not wanting to rush things, just watch out for shuro i guess.
chilchuck tims
reader's crush: chilchuck learning about reader's crush is a bit sad, though he's no stranger to romance as he not only had a wife but also three whole kids, he's not really good with emotions so he's kind of scared you'll leave him just like his wife did, so, if reader confesses, there's gonna be a high chance that you'll be rejected, just give it some time.
chilchuck's crush: this weird feeling in his chest whenever he see's you will confuse him at first.. there's no way he has a crush on you?? after his wife leaving him he didn't really have any interest in romance, he might as well just focus on his work at the moment, one of these days he'll bring up the courage to confess, just not right now.
marcille donato
reader's crush: she can't really decide on whether she'll return the feelings or not, definitely flattered is what i'll say.
marcille's crush: she's similar to falin, she'll build up a better relationship with you for the right time to confess, she tries to make it seem as if she's not into you but it's quite obvious to the other party members.
senshi of izganda
reader's crush: out of everyone, he'll definitely be the most flattered, someone having a crush on him wasn't something he put much thought into, not to mention romance kind of isn't his thing, nor does he think he have the time for a significant other.
senshi's crush: i don't think this is the very first time he's ever had feelings for someone, but it's definitely a special feeling, he's not nervous of confessing his feelings at all actually, and he's not that sensitive to rejection.
namari
reader's crush: namari wouldn't really know how to react, honestly, she's never given the idea of someone having a crush on her much thought, she won't care much about rejecting the reader, at least she's honest.
namari's crush: her crush will be a bit hard to spot but when it comes to you, there will be a notable soft spot, she treats you like everyone else and isn't afraid to scold you if you do something wrong.
shuro | toshiro nakamoto
reader's crush: in an au where he still has feelings for falin, he immediately rejects you, telling you boldly that his heart is for falin and falin alone, but lets go to an au where he either loses interest in her or doesn't like her at all; definitely flattered, someone liking him (back) isn't unheard of but it is... nice?
shuro's crush: just look at what he does with falin, he will propose to you at some point, of course when time goes by and he starts to fall for you harder and harder, until he just can't contain it anymore.
izutsumi
reader's crush: very, very strange, someone having a crush on her is.. almost unheard of, or she doesn't pay much attention, anywho, she doesn't know... how to react? she knows what to do if she doesn't return the feelings but... someone liking her is just weird lmao.
izutsumi's crush: she won't make it obvious.... or try to at least, she accepts affection from you much more than she does from the others and sticks by your side more.
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funlovinzara · 2 months
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“Clingy..” Reigen Arataka x Shy! Black! Reader
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Intro: You and Reigen have been together for a short time now, but you both have shown so much love and attraction towards another. However, slowly…you can feel his work getting the best of him.
Warnings: A bit of angst, arguing? Fluff ending
“I got a thing for you, and i cant let go…”
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Reigen was absolutely mesmerized, from head to toe Reigen thought you were most beautiful person He’s ever met. Reigen introduced you to his tiny workforce that consisted of just Mob, Serizawa, and Dimple. You’ve grown fond of the small group and the tasks you would all go on together, Reigen himself would catch himself slacking on work just to simply look at you. On some occasions Dimple would have to snap him back to earth from day dreaming. You would usually visit Reigen after (insert job or college classes), and he would be welcoming and warm. Not even you could feel anything being off about him, but someone could.
Mob as been monitoring for awhile, he likes seeing Reigen happy. Seeing others enjoying themselves pleases Mob, because he knows he’s safe. Recently however Mob has noticed Reigen growing very slight eye bags and not communicating as often as he normally would, and he can see it reflect onto you.
Today was a new day, you come into the office taking a break from stress. “Oh hey y/n! H..how are you?” Serizawa was the first to look up at the door to see you walk in. You and Serizawa were very close, both of you were pretty timid most of the time and he can explain himself more better around you. You radiate a warm energy that Serizawa can feel himself in and it’s pleasing to everyone in the office. “Hi Serizawa, im okay.” He smiles back at you, everyone in the office knows your short answers are just normal. “Hi mob!” You walk past Mob and pet his head “Hi y/n!” He smiles with a small blush.
You and Mob were also close, Mob could talk to you about school and he can get help from certain subjects that you understood more than him. He sees you more as a big sister he’s never had, he can play video games with you and chat with you easily without feeling flustered or stammering every few seconds. You reach to Reigens desk, looking up and waving at Dimple, he waves back. Reigen looks up from his computer clearly tired, usually you being around would calm him and he would get more relaxed but he’s just pure tense this time. “Hi reigen..!” You say, almost as a whisper. You didn’t ever speak too loudly unless your around friends your comfortable with. He didn’t say anything back.
You decided not to bother and sat next to him seeing what he was doing on his computer, appears to be another psychic offer job. You pay no mind and rest your head on his shoulder “Y/n…im a little busy today. I don’t have time.” Mob, on the side of the room by Serizawa, listens. His ears perk up. You respond to Reigen “Don’t have time? For what?” Reigen clearly didn’t want to start anything so he said back “T..time for…you and your busy life.” Busy life? He just had no care for what you did at all today? Well i guess you could understand.
“But..Reigen i just think you should take a break as-well. You look very tired and i wanted to ask if you wanted to go out-.”
Reigen abruptly cuts you off
“Y/n.”
You freeze.
“Get off me.”
What?
“I said get off me.”
You get off looking at him more confused than before, “Reigen whats going on-.”
“Y/N! Please i cant hear your voice today. I have a throbbing headache. For once, just stop being so clingy.”
You pause. He thinks you’re clingy? Dimple steps in to stop this. “Reigen theres no reason to be so pushy…” He gravitates towards his ear and continues whispering “…your fumbling really badly here..” Reigen shooed dimple away. You stood up grabbing your things and making your way to the door, if he didn’t want to talk then so be it. Reigen isn’t a necessity in your life anyway. You exit the office room and walk down the hall before you hear the door open again. “Y/n!” Mob speed walks towards you.
“Im sorry, i should have said something. Master Reigen had a bad day and he didn’t-.” You leaned in giving Mob a hug. “It’s okay, I’ll be back later..” you don’t think you are.
Later that night you receive a message, from Reigen
Reigen: Im sorry.
-Left on seen-
Reigen: Please y/n i had a really rough day, i would never mean to call you clingy love.
-Left on seen-
Reigen: y/n..
You had to give in, he was your gosh darn boyfriend afterall
Y/N: i forgive you..
Reigen: Really? Im going to make this up to you i promise, do you think you can take another day off for me? Im sorry you had to waste your time today.
Y/n: I can try
Reigen: Thank you so much sweetheart, i love you
Y/n: I love you too!
Reigen: 🫶🏻
_________________________
Reigens Pov ‘Earlier that day’
“I understand i made a mistake alright?!” Reigen bites at Mob, sounding more pissed than before. “Yes but master Reigen, y/n loves you more than anyone! I care about y/n as-well and i don’t think you should treat her that way, even if you’ve had a bad day.” Serizawa and Dimple step in to cover Mob because they don’t need him getting mad as-well on the job. “M..mob is right Reigen. I…i think you should apologize.” Dimple nods, agreeing with him. “Reigen do you understand how much people value her here? Another man greater than you could easily swoop her off her feet and take her away from you” Dimple scolds Reigen.
Reigen calms himself slowly agreeing with everyone. “I’ll text her and apologize.”
“I think you should go further.” Dimple adds
“I mean clearly apologizing isn’t enough, take her out somewhere or something to make up for it.” Reigen looks up at dimple. “You just want the food don’t you.” Dimple shrugs and floats away. Reigen picks up his phone and pounds your number, he didn’t know how he was going to do this
Reigen: Im sorry.
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My daysss yalll my fingers are hurttinnn. I love Reigen so much tho hes so silly😭🙏
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can you make one with matt murdock where they're good friends but one night they're drinking and having fun and then the reader kiss him but when they making out he ends up saying someone else name and the reader leaves, later on they talk and reader apologizes for misreading their relationship and continue to be friends but theres tension in it until bradley finally admits that he likes her and he try to make up for all the time lost
~Friends Don't Treat Me Like You Do~
Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader
Word Count: 3k
Warnings: none really, embarrassment?? Alcohol consumption, mentions of injuries (nothing major)
Genre: mostly fluff very minor angst
Summary: You've had a crush on your friend for a very long time and when you finally make your move it goes terribly wrong; And that's why friends should sleep in other beds // and friends shouldn't kiss me like you do ... // my friends won't love me like you - Friends by Ed Sheeran
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A/N: I know it's a typo of some sort but it's sending me to the moon that the name Bradley is jus thrown into this ask cuz I can't even figure out what it's replacing lmaoooo anyway thank you for requesting! I hope you like it anon! :3 (also I didn't edit this plz be nice)
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Your friendship with Matt Murdock is in some ways rather unconventional. You've been friends for many years, but these days most of your interactions consist of him stumbling over to your apartment at odd hours covered in bruises you don't ask about- not because you don't want to know but because you're pretty certain you've guessed it and you're not sure what acknowledging it would mean. So you don't ask, instead, you give him food, and tend to his wounds, and talk to him about whatever comes to mind until he inevitably falls asleep on your couch for a few hours and sneaks out early enough to go back to his place for his day job as a defense attorney with his two friends. Both of whom you'd consider friends- although not nearly as close as you are with Matt.
Tonight Matt's invited you over to his place. Apparently, he's been feeling a bit guilty that most of the time you've spent together in recent days has been just him coming over in the middle of the night. As if you'd ever actually be annoyed with taking care of your friend. Your friend you feel for more than he can ever know. Still, he insisted you come over for dinner so you did, he ordered your favorite from a takeout place near his place and now you're eating and drinking wine you brought along with you. Well, you're drinking wine, Matt's been helping himself to the beers filling his fridge.
"Whenever you come over I do all that talking Matty so today you can do the talking this time. Tell me what you've been getting up to lately." You tell him once you've covered asking each other how your day was.
"I don't do anything interesting y/n- I go to work, spend all day reading or writing lengthy opening statements or discussing things with Foggy and our clients until ungodly hours according to Karen. Sometimes they drag me out to Josie's but- there's really nothing I 'get up to' and you know that."
"Why do you do that?" You frown.
"What?"
"Make yourself seem so dull when you're not."
"Excuse me?"
"I've known you for a long time Matt and I can't think of single period of our lives where you had nothing interesting going on and yet you always talk about yourself as if you're the color beige personified. It's like you're worried that if people think you're too interesting they'll," you trail for a moment "find out something."
"What does that mean?"
"Nothing in particular. You're just way more interesting than you want people to think. For some reason."
"And what about you?"
"What about me?"
"You're not exactly an open book either."
"You got something to ask me about Matty?"
"No." He shakes his head. You stare at him for a long moment.
"We should play a game!" You announce.
"I don't really- have games?" Matt says.
"There are tons of games that don't require having anything Matt we just have to pick one."
"Like what?"
"We can play 20 questions- the right way, last letter first letter, I'm not a fan of Ghost but we can do that too, or word replacement- to name a few."
"I'm- not familiar with those besides 20 questions?"
"Well, last letter first letter you pick a category and we name items except the last letter of one item has to be the first letter of the next one so like if we're naming office supplies and I say stapler you'd say something like ruler. And Ghost is a spelling game, kinda like hot potato meets Horse the basketball game- so like you take turns spelling a word and you don't wanna be the one who finishes the word- if you do then you get a letter from the word ghost- first person to finish ghost loses. And then word replacement is just a silly game where you pick a movie or show title and change one of the words to the silliest thing you can think of." You explain quickly.
"Let's do the title one. Requires the least amount of thinking and I don't have to compete with you." He says.
"Then I'll start. Fast and Constipated." You giggle.
"Fast and Constipated!?" Matt's laugh is incredulous.
"Yeah, fast and furious but not so fun."
"Okay um- John Tucker Must... Juggle."
"That's way less fun than him dying." You laugh.
"True."
"What a Chupacabra wants."
"Goats- obviously."
"Shut up." You giggle.
"Now you- resent me 2."
"Oh that's- why would you say that?" You chuckle.
"I dunno I'm too drunk to think of movies." He mutters.
"All I've got are rom-coms in my head and those titles are not nearly as fun to fuck with. Two weeks- paleontologist?" 
"Paleontologist!? What movie was that even supposed to be?"
"Two weeks notice. Duh."
"I don't think I know that one." He frowns.
"It's about a woman who ends up working as the PA for some rich businessman when she tries to protest something he's trying to build- I forget the details but he turns out to be a giant useless manchild and when he disrupts her personal life for something frivolous she tries to quit but somehow they fall in love or whatever. It's been a while since I've watched it honestly." You shrug.
"Rom-coms are such a curious collection of movies."
"True but that one is pretty average compared to some others I've seen."
"Do you watch a lot of them?"
"I like to laugh at them mostly." You say. "You know what's a weird one? The Notebook."
"Is that not like- a classic?"
"I mean yeah but like the guy gets the girl to go on a date with him by dangling off of a moving ferris wheel."
"And that works?"
"Somehow! I mean I guess she didn't wanna feel responsible for him dropping himself off the wheel in front of an audience but I dunno it seems like he was just looking for reasons to die in that movie." You explain. "Although I never finished that movie maybe he does die. Except then it wouldn't be a rom-com I guess. It would be more tragedy, like in the Shakespearean sense."
"You are always somewhere else." Matt laughs.
"Not always! Oh! I brought that CD you wanted to borrow. We should play it." You sit up suddenly and grab your backpack.
"Are you sure all you've had is that bottle of wine?" Matt asks sitting up slowly from where he's laying on the floor.
"Where's your player?" You ignore his question.
"Should be in the bookcase." He waves absentmindedly.
"Do you want another beer while I'm up?" You ask walking over to the radio to pop the CD.
"Nah. I'm good thanks." He says. Music fills the apartment, and you can't help but sing along to the upbeat tune from Matt's CD player. You dance, well mostly spin, around the apartment giggling as you go.
"Are you dancing?" Matt turns towards you with a smile on his face although you're not looking at him.
"Of course I am- I love this song. Do you wanna dance with me?" You ask walking towards him, still dancing but less now so you can get where you're going.
"No no- I'll leave the dancing to you." Matt says before you make it all the way over to where he's sitting on the floor.
"Suit yourself." You shrug but when you attempt to change directions you trip on your backpack still on the floor and go tumbling towards the ground. Matt moves quicker than you'd expect for a blind guy off several beers but his arms shoot out and yank you towards him before your head hits the hardwood.
"Careful y/n." He says softly as he settles you into his lap.
"Do I need to be if you're here?" You joke smiling at him as you toss your arms over his shoulders.
"Y/n-" Matt's tone is warning in a way only he could get away with using on you.
"Relax Matty, I know to look after myself." You say quietly. Matt frowns slightly as if he's going to protest, but you don't let him get the words out. Alcohol coursing through your system, you seize the opportunity of his closeness and kiss him before you can talk yourself out of it. Matt lets out a noise of surprise, he heard your heart rate spike sure but he couldn't have guessed this was why. His lips move against yours for a second before something catches his attention and he's gasping out a name. Except, it's not your name.
"Karen." He breathes and it reaches your ears like a bucket of ice water dumped on your head. You jerk back suddenly.
"Oh my god-" You say scrambling out of his lap. "I- I am so sorry. I'm gonna go." You grab your bag and b-line it for the exit before Matt can even get to his feet.
"H-hang on a second y/n I-"
"I'll- I'll see you around Matt." You force yourself to say before leaving his apartment. You feel sharper than the amount of wine you've had should allow as you walk the few blocks to your place. Only once you're back in the safety of your own home do you let yourself wallow over how absolutely embarrassing that was. You might have just ruined one of the most important relationships in your life only for him to call out for another girl. You stumble into the shower in hopes of washing away some of the embarrassment you feel, or at the very least distracting yourself enough that you can shelf it and get some sleep. You spend hours tossing and replaying the moment excruciatingly but eventually, exhausting wins out and you do fall asleep. The next couple of days you pretty much ignore Matt's calls and texts. You really bury yourself in work to avoid dwelling on that awful night but you know you can't dodge him forever. Evidently, two days is as much as Matt's willing to give you to do so because on day 3 of avoidance he comes knocking at your door late at night as he sometimes does.
"Look- I know you've been avoiding me and all but-"
"Whatever you're gonna say Matt no need. I'm sorry I overstepped, I- I totally misread things the other night but hey- alcohol will do that sometimes. I'm sorry. We're good though. I'm good. I just needed a minute to lick my wounds of embarrassment. Everything's fine. Come on let's see the damage tonight hm?" You lead him into your apartment ignoring the confused look on his face. You let yourself settle back into your routine with him, patching him up, giving him food, getting him up to speed on the last couple of days of your life, telling stories, and just talking until he falls asleep on your couch. You're determined to shake this stupid crush of yours off and go back to the way things have always been between you. And if you're gonna shake this crush step one is putting yourself out there. Which you do, and for the next few weeks you find yourself on dates almost every night. Tonight's date is going surprisingly well all things considered. He'd planned to take you somewhere that ended up being closed after a freak accident the other day that he didn't know about. It was around the corner from Josie's so you brought him here instead and the conversation has been well worth it- even in a place like this. The one downside is that it's Friday and Foggy and Karen usually drag Matt here for drinks on Friday. You had hoped they'd skip out on that tonight but you of course could only be so lucky. When the bell over the door rings and you turn to see Karen leading Matt into the bar with Foggy behind them you almost want to groan. Dating has been nice but seeing Karen and Matt so close is like picking a scab. You turn back to your date with a smile, intent on ignoring the trio, except of course it couldn't be that simple.
"Oh my gosh! Y/n! Hey!" Karen beams at you.
"Karen! Hi! Foggy, Matt, good to see you all." You smile.
"You didn't tell us you'd be here tonight." She says.
"Well I didn't plan on it otherwise of course I'd have let you know." You tell her. "James this is Karen and that's Foggy and Matt. They're friends of mine. They all work together we've- kind of crashed their spot tonight." You tell your date.
"Oh! Well, any friend of yours is a friend of mine. Nice to meet y'all." James shakes each of their hands. "Did you guys- wanna join us? Since it's pretty crowded in here you might not find another table."
"That's so nice of you James!" Karen says. Very nice indeed.
"I'll track down some chairs." Foggy says. You shift your seat closer to James to make room at the table since apparently they'll be joining you. You try not to pay too much attention to Matt's silence as everyone settles around the table.
"So y/n, you told James how we know you but you didn't mention how you know James. Are you guys work colleagues or something?"
"We have a mutual friend that set us up." James offers.
"Oh my gosh! We're crashing a date?! Why didn't you say so?" Karen shakes her head.
"No no no don't even worry about it, we've been here a couple of hours already. I invited you to sit with us so the night could go on." He says.
"Asking me, also would have worked." You smile.
"You guys are just the cutest." Karen sighs.
"I'm guessing this is a first date since- y/n's never mentioned you before." Matt says.
"It is. Not that I have to tell you about every guy I see." You say.
"You tell me everything." He scoffs.
"That's not true and even if it were that doesn't change the fact that I don't have to."
"So you keep things from me?"
"Am I missing something?" James chuckles.
"Matt and y/n have been friends since they were teenagers. They fight like they're siblings sometimes." Foggy explains.
"Sorry about that James. Matt's just-"
"Like a brother- I get it. I have siblings so I definitely know what it's like." He nods.
"Exactly." You smile.
"Like a brother." Matt quirks an eyebrow at you.
"As good a way as any to describe us." You nod. Matt hums and raises his glass to his lips without another word. The five of you sit and talk over drinks for another hour before you're ready to leave and James is happy to walk you out.
"I had a lot of fun tonight." He tells you.
"Even with the date crashers?" You ask with a goofy grimace.
"Heck yeah! Your friends are great." He laughs. "Next time I'll have my friends crash us. How about that?"
"Next time?"
"If you're willing. I'd really like to see you again."
"I- I'd like that." You nod.
"Cool. I'll- start coming up with second date ideas."
"Hopefully this time the place you pick doesn't impromptu have an incident." You laugh.
"I will quadruple check." He tells you. When you reach your block, but not your building, you stop and turn to him.
"Sounds good. I'll see you around James." You smile. He leans forward and kisses your cheek softly.
"Goodnight y/n." He says and walks away. You make it up to your apartment, kick off your shoes, and take a long shower. You enjoyed talking to James and you actually are interested in seeing him again for sure. Soon you're showered and pajamaed and pretty much ready for bed but before you can flop into it there's a knock at your door. Who could be knocking on your door right now? A quick check shows you it's Matt standing in your hallway.
"Matthew?" You open the door with a frown.
"What the hell are you doing?"
"Well- right now I'm wondering what you're doing in my apartment."
"Like a brother to you?! Seriously? Last time I checked most people don't make out with their brothers."
"Depends on where you are I suppose." You shrug. "But regardless Matt that was a mistake we both know that." You shake your head.
"A mistake? Is that how you feel about it?"
"How I- I'm sorry did you forget calling out Karen's name while I was kissing you?! Cuz I've been trying to so if you've got tips to share on how that'd be great."
"Goddammit y/n." He sighs dropping his head.
"Matt you really should go. I know you worry or whatever but- James is, nice and it's late I'd like to go to bed."
"Screw James." Matt scoffs.
"Um- it was only our first date- you're skipping a few steps."
"That is not what I- it's like you do this on purpose."
"What are you doing here Matt?" You sigh. 
"I don't like you dating him. I don't like you dating anyone for that matter. How could you kiss me like that and just... move on like nothing?"
"I dunno it's pretty easy when you call me the wrong name." You say.
"That was not what you think."
"I'm sure."
"It wasn't y/n. I'm serious. I could-" Matt stops and lets out a breath. "I'm Daredevil." He says.
"I know." You nod.
"What? You know?"
"You come in here at the witching hour every few days covered in bruises Matt how many explanations could there possibly be for that?" You roll your eyes.
"You never asked."
"I figured you'd tell me when you were ready." You shrug. "Why tell me now?"
"Since I can't see- my other senses make up for the loss. They're like- very developed. I heard Karen scream somewhere in Hell's Kitchen, she sounded like she was in trouble that's- that's why I called out her name. I thought maybe one of Daredevil's many enemies managed to connect her to me. It wouldn't be the first time, I'm always listening for her and Foggy these days and I just-"
"Well was she in danger?" You ask.
"Nightmare." He mutters. "But by the time I pieced that together you were gone."
"Of course I was. Having a man say someone else's name when you kiss him is not something that encourages-" Matt cuts off your snarky remark by cupping your face in his hands and kissing you. You react quickly, kissing him back, your hands wrapping around his wrists. By the time you pull away from him, you're breathing heavily.
"I'm in love with you. I have been for as long as I can remember. I'm sorry I wasn't clear about it." He says.
"Oh."
"Oh?"
"Well in my defense I've spent the last few weeks trying to get over you-" Matt kisses you again, hard, possessive, fiery.
"Don't." He says.
"Obviously." You grab the collar of his shirt and kiss him again. You spent years thinking you'd never get to kiss him, now that you know the truth you fully intend to take advantage and Matt has years of pining he wants to make up for.
***
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hajihiko · 2 years
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What did you make of DR3's explanation for how the characters became Despairs?
I dont like it. Here's a re-write i was thinking about
Ok note: this is what would have made the School Life thing more enjoyable TO ME. Not gonna fit for everyone obvi
Ok first of all. Junko loses most of her potential if you take away her being sneaky and manipulative, which we barely even got to see in the games, so I want that in ACTION.
Second of all, this takes time. More than just like a single moment of anime hypnotism. Junko was definitely working her suckers for at least a year. I dont know how that reflects on the timeline and I dont super care
-
Chisa's class is full of chaos, these are some of the rowdiest students you'll find. They have potential for getting along, but they're also Very Troubled, and Chisa is a kind soul who tries to help them out with various issues. Actual attention paid to these kids being, like, KIDS, but also having some major red flags in their backgrounds that could escalate out of control very fast.
Among others, she tries to get Chiaki to come out of her shell and interact with the others more. This is hard, because Chiaki is not exactly receptive to it at first, but theres a little bit of unity between all the students anyway and they slowly start becoming friends. Chiaki uses this friendship guidance to befriend a lonely boy who often stares longingly at the school, whom she's noticed by silently sticking to the background when he's around. This will come in handy later.
Until, certain students start hanging out with their junior of 1 year, who always seems to be kind of slinking around and hanging with at least one student a day. Chiaki notices this because a) shes very quiet and mostly goes unnoticed when she's in the background, and b) she only needs half her attention span to play games anyway.
The people Junko hangs around get noticeably worse, though not necessarily more divided; just sort of 10 steps backwards for every 1 step Chisa helped them take. The rude and mean ones stop trying to be kinder, the shy and meek ones retreat even more, etc. Chisa is at a complete loss with this, but Chiaki confides in her that it might be the new student making trouble. Chisa takes over, and encourages Chiaki to keep trying to make friends with the others, which Chiaki does.
(Mahiru gets scared into telling no one what happened / what she suspects happened in Natsumi's murder, and gets rid of the evidence, as advised. The evidence she throws away gets mailed to Fuyuhiko, who is encouraged to avenge his sister. Guess who orchestrated all that?)
Chiaki does not fall into Junko's claws, because she's quiet and unobtrusive and, importantly, less desperate for what Junko can give her than the rest is. Chiaki does, after all, have her teacher who took the reigns and told Chiaki to grab her own oxygen mask first, and her Lonely Boy to confide in, and whenever she starts to lose herself, he gently reminds her to stand firm. That's right, the secret weapon was the friends we made along the way, just like in the ending.
(Hajime is probably just doing things more or less like in the anime, maybe listens to Chiaki's growing worries about her semi-friends, shits getting fucked and the only conceivable way Hajime can help is by agreeing to be a lab rat obviously what else. Biggest downfall is wanting to be there for Chiaki, but not letting her be there for him in return. Because inferiority complex.)
Chisa goes to confront this troubled mystery girl; Junko catches her too and starts working her nasty magic- for example, did you know two of your students were a part of a murder? Aren't you supposed to be guiding them? Do you know what's really happening in this school? Do you wanna see the human experimentation they just started? Did you know your best friend is in love with your crush and you can't confide in either of them anymore actually? Etc.
Chiaki is all alone now. When she finally DOES confront Junko, once the whole class along with the teacher has been sort of indoctrinated and her Lonely Boy has ditched her and she's feeling a bit brave because of it all), Junko kills her horribly in front of everyone as they do nothing. Not because they were hypnotized, but because they choose to. This is what really marks the point of no return for them. Chiaki was a quiet and harmless and mostly very nice girl, and her death was pointless, and they were a part of it, and they got away with it.
Instead of being a practically perfect student council president, Chiaki has more of an NPC theme, falling into the background more but also being honest and nice and willing to work with people. Then later, obviously, she really is an NPC and repeats the process, but this time she manages to save her boy and therefore her class.
(I'm not opposed to Chiaki being JUST an AI and never a part of the class at all, but I havent thought about it as much so idk any good points)
Hajime retains the same themes, but gets to be more of a juxtaposition of Junko, sneaking into everyone's hearts by befriending them and helping them move forward instead of backwards. He wins with the power of friendship and all that jazz.
Everyone else gets way more accountability to take. No hypnotism or brain poking, just digging into the worst parts of themselves and then indulging them entirely (with the help of Ultimate Charismatic Cult Leader Junko). I think the most interesting thing about this whole narrative could be that Anyone is capable of intense cruelty, and Anyone can choose to be a better person moving forward.
anyway in my mind that's what happened differently.
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jacobtheloofah · 2 months
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ive unexpectedly gotten way back into overwatch 2, heres some observations:
im frankly annoyed to say that the game has really gotten to a good state of balance in terms of the meta. there's very few weak points in the roster, some heroes still suffer from really doing well in certain situations and not very well in others, and i genuinely love a lot of the changes that have been made to heroes. i used to absolutely hate orisa and now i love her, i find myself even playing more symmetra and brigitte and so on. i suppose the biggest critique is that sombra is now extremely fun to play but extremely not fun to play against
the battle pass is annoying but easy to ignore, and now that there isnt the constant chase for lootboxes my god the game is so much more rewarding and healthy. its no longer "i gotta play more to get more gold" its "im gonna play a few rounds and then call it a day" like thank goodness
theres still plenty of chodes in quickplay who treat it way too serious even tho comp is right there for them
"mystery heroes" always seems to have the most positive and fun players
ive gotten way worse at deathmatch which makes me sad
"hero mastery" is a fucking joke unless youre really into speedruns
i dont know what the "missions" mode is and i dont care enough to find out
for me personally i do not miss the lack of PvE, i always hated every PvE event so no skin off my back but it does feel lame that they completely backtracked on that promise for those who did want it
i think we can officially declare the lore to be absolutely pointless beyond letting the team make heroes with unique abilities. like they went "heres a healer with sun powers cuz shes the last warrior from a group that had solar threads augmented into their bodies so they could harness the power of the sun." sure, fuckin whatever, shes fun to play so thats all that matters. we're never gonna get lore for zenyatta at this point so im checked out of that. its like that graph someone made that was like "star wars is aesthetically sci fi but materially fantasy" its the same thing, it works i guess
zarya still has no good skins
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esoteriamaya · 2 years
Text
Scorpio Moon/8th House Observations: The Good, Bad, & The Ugly.
Scorpio Moons/8th House Moons are and interesting brand of individuals. As they are the most secretive in the group, they are also the ones who hide their hand a lot of the time.
Scorpio/8th House Moons have a tendency to leave their vulnerable state in the closet when around a certain crowd. This isn't always a bad thing, however the closer you get the more they'll put you through a test. This is unbeknownst to people most of the time. They dont like to tell you when their putting you through a test because wheres the fun in that? To prove your loyalty, you must already be ahead of the game. They hold a lot of secrets, and because they have to know who can go through this made up maze to get to the other side, you will be on the closed end of the hearts until you are close enough to be given the key.
8th house moons are capable of being vulnerable to the right individuals, however this may take a few years. You could know this person all your life and you still wouldn't know too much of them. I would say its because they don't trust you but its deeper than that. They dont trust themselves.
As scorpios can be a walking mirror, others are mirrors to them as well. They cannot hide their skeletons as much as they think they can, because its always staring back at them through others. Again, people do not realize they are doing this to them. Only scorpios moons can tell when something is showing it self through others on a psychological basis.
Scorpio Moons/8th house moons are 'mysterious' due to not expressing their emotions to people on a day to day basis. While everyone else is used to expressing their emotions (depending on the house) in a more open manner, these individuals are always controlling them. This gets to the point where this becomes unhealthy. Because later down the line, the energy thats hurling up inside of them eventually needs a release. & when its not.... it'll get poisonous. The venom starts shooting out in more ways then one, causing them to hurt people in the process.
They can have psychological warfares going on if they are not healing what is locked in those closets of theres, which is why its safe to say they must be more vulnerable as this is apart of the healing process.
Most won't ever go this far, though. Most times they feel the need to show this to romantic lovers and lovers alone. & This is when we see the heart attack. Because the lover is suppose to be the one that doesnt judge you so what happens when they do? They shut them and the rest of the world out. Scorpio moons/8th house moons already dont show to much to their family, because they grew up being on a different dimension then the rest of them and are often misunderstood. So if your lover or not even your friends can love you even in the state you hide the most.. who can?
So all those precious secrets, dreams, talents, skills and powerful emotions get locked away and to never be seen again. Sometimes they might show us a glimpse of what it is that they have going on in that beautiful world of theres but eventually hide back into their shell because how do they know if youre just saying that to be real? Or just trying to find a way to get into what's in their minds?
One thing I will say is that is a toxic trait is their ability of being a master manipulator and hiding their hand. When it suits them, they do this to get the other hand. Especially when they're trying to prove their 'point'. Because I have known many 8th house moons and scorpio moons personally (and have so for many, many years) there has never been a dull moment where this did not happen. To prove their point and to seem less guilty, they will only show you one side of the story. You need to know how to discern and listen out for the things they say or you'll be sitting in that loop of destruction and lies.
You have to be up on your game on how manipulation works to see how they could be doing it since they are already so good at it. If they only show you 'one side' and I mean if every time you guys talk or link up they are only showing you one version of their complex personality and thats it. You are not getting the full dose of who they are and thats okay. They might not be sure if they can show that side to you yet, or at all. And from what I've noticed, most dont see the reason too if they like you enough.
If you are very close to them though, at some point they arent able to hide these traits like they think they do. Because there were times where I pointed out the things that they do at times were wrong, selfish and manipulative and they would 'stop' doing it but later down the line you would realize they just found a better way to hide it and never really changed it. Not only that, they'll probably stop telling you certain things so you will look at them a certain way. And if that doesnt work? They will run & hide for the hills.
Its all about the control, and if their not able to control their inner reality from showing itself to you, then they will get you out of their outer reality. Works to keep that 'magician' persona alive.
Another thing I will express about them is that most times they are not fully aware of their darkness but are still coming into terms with it. So many childhood, woes, fears, and psychological traumas can come out through these placement holders because they are most likely the healers of their generation. Their family bloodlines are needed to be healed through them so these beings can go through a lot when its time to get through the trauma. Healing is not linear for them so at times this can look very crazy so they need someone who understand them in some way because they do not understand themselves most of the time.
They do have wonderful insight on the world around them and can see through anybody if given the green light (green light as in morphing into their surrounds and allowing information to come through them without trying to control it). I would be mindful with telling them certain stuff, people feel the need to tell them things because it feels easy to (like any water sign) but I'd hold back a bit if you know someone with those placements. Because although most can keep a secret some will lash out and may use them against you. This is the unevolved ones of course and sometimes most won't use it against you per say, will just use it or talk about it as if you didnt just share a vulnerable moment with them & act like its nothing.
I'll speak more on these individuals later, as this is a pretty heavy topic. And I wrote too much lol. If you enjoyed my insight on the placements let me know :) I like feedback.
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pacifymebby · 2 years
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i fucking love all ur peaky blinders writings you do them so well!! i was wondering if u could write one of about the peaky blinders n a reader that’s involved in a mafia, yk she has power, she’s strong, not intimidating by men, doesn’t hesitate to point a gun at someone’s head
Aw lovely thank u i am v happy u enjoy my work its so lovely to here!! Im so new to writing peaky boys stuff so its cool to see people enjoying it <3 <3
Hope you like these x some of them are long, i guess i got carried away haha
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Tommy
🌿He can tell there's something different about you, something dangerous, a different kind of higher class, the second he sees you..
🌿And when he learns who you are - a mafia princess - his mind is set.
🌿He has to have you... Not just once, but for keeps.
🌿It wouldn't just be startegically a perfect move, ot would also bolster his ego. This is a man who wants the whole world and to wed mafia royalty... That would be a pretty big chunk of the world.
🌿But it would be scandalous in many ways... Hes a politician, a sitting MP... And its no secret the corruption, violence and murderous tendencies of your infamous family. There would be no feigning innocence anymore.
🌿If he's going to be with you he'll have to do it with his whole chest, openly admit to his own corruption and wrong doing, he'd have to be the bad guy in the open...
🌿 And he'd have to play his cards right, he couldn't be playing games with you... He's fairly certain playing games will end with one of your bullets in his brain.
🌿 You're already used to the finer things in life so his wining and dining and usual tactics won't work on you. "Is all this supposed to impress me Mr Shelby?"
🌿Your family probably have tigers roaming the villa grounds you grew up in. You probably grew up alongside wild animals...
🌿 And youre supposed to be impressed by a country estate and race horses...
🌿 Actually the things that really attract you to tommy are these:
🌿🌿He's troubled, he fought in a war, one which your family watched and ignored... You secretly don't believe that the men in your family, know what its really like to be a man, fighting to protect the family... Though they tell you that's what they're doing all the time.
🌿🌿His roots, theres somrthing mysterious about it, the fact that he talks to his horses, the fact you've heard theres a gypsy curse on his head. It's more interesting to you than anything you've heard back in New York
🌿🌿 The fact that there was a time in his life when he had nothing, he actually clawed his way out of poverty...you were born into your riches, you've never really had to work for anything in your life, so youre in awe of the things hes won for himself.
🌿🌿 You also love the way he takes whatever he wants from the world, just snatches it up regardless of whether he deserves it or not. Youre hoping thats what he'll do to you. Steal you away from your family. Claim you as his own.
🌿But you wont admit any of these things to him, you play the princess personality up for all its worth because you like the idea of being the one thing tommy shelby can't have
🌿Tommys brothers think hes daft for even trying... They've seen you, heard rumours about you, they think hes way out of his depth... But tommy is determined
🌿 And one day when you finally give into the charm youd been resisting, you become the most feared couple... The mafia are secretly scared of your gypsy husband, they dont trust that he wont put a curse on them... And tommys family are terrified of you, the unpredictable, spoilt princess who will not hesitate to shoot someone dead just for looking at her funny.
🌿He can't tame you though and it concerns him, you probably make more trouble than its worth... You don't have the manners of the english and you refuse to learn them. Not even Tommy can teach you.
🌿 Calls you princess to patronise you, enjoys talking down to you and trying to put you in your place even if it hardly ever works. Showers you with gifts, and when he realises how drawn to his gypsy roots you are, he starts showering you with gypsy gifts, little trinkets hes carved for you himself, jewels with fine tales behind them, mysterious histories which capture your imagination.
🌿He likes to take you out on horseback to the middle of nowhere, lie down with you under the shade of a tree or on the bank if a river and tell you as many stories as he can, either from his childhood or gypsy tales you tell little children. Its his only way of getting you to calm down or behave yourself, of getting you to stop putting on that "fearless and fearsome mafia wife" personality.
Alfie
🐻Can't imagine you'd get on very well at first... If he realised his attraction to you he'd be angry with himself for thinking that way about a "wop"
🐻 He'd definitely try to ignore it... Which would be difficult because every time you were in a room with him you'd be little miss provocative, trying to get under his skin.
🐻 Youre not sure if thats because youre so used to all men falling at your feet that youre actively pissed off that this man wont... Or if its because you can see that he is attracted to you, but isnt acting on it (which would piss you off even more than the former) OR (and this is unlikely right, you would never!) perhaps you find him attractive. This slightly mad, older man who behaves as close to any mafia man youve ever met only rougher, not so well groomed. Hes a little gruff, theres something a little dirty about him...
🐻 Also youre a mafia woman... Youve been spoilt rotten your whole life by your father and brothers but youve never really felt the love of any of them... Youve only ever been treated like a possession by them... Which is a sure fire recipe for DaddyIssues™️
🐻 This gruff and slightly insane older man then, might be the only person who could ever be everything you ever needed...
🐻 But that discovery probably pisses you off even more, so its likely that in the moment went you realise what you really want from him, you raise your gun to his head, make him look down the end of it.
🐻 He's probably the only one of the peaky men who isn't actually scared of you, not because he doesnt think youre unpredictable and dangerous, but because hes not scared of death, hes looked it in the eyes one too many times to be scared of a "little girl" with a gun.
🐻 "Alright alright so youve got yourself a gun and youre not afraid to use it... You've come in here... To my humble bakery what i built up from absolutely fuck all... And you're waving that thing in my face like its fuckin christmas day and you just plucked it out of Santas fuckin sack..." "Did you get it for Christmas y/n? Did santa make it for you in the North fucken Pole?"
🐻 "You can pretend to be a mad old man all you like Mr Solomons but I'm not scared of old men..."
🐻 "Ohh well, thats alright then, thats good very good actually, cause see somet you might not know about me right? Im not afraid of little girls... Yeah?"
🐻 The remark would shock you a little, not much but enough to make you hesitate, and in that second of hesitation he could disarm you. Not that you'll ever make the same mistake again.
🐻 But this time he disarms you and pushes you back down onto his desk, takes your chin between his thumb and index finger so that you have to look him in the eyes. He can see how angry you are but he isnt deterred because he has control now and he knows he won't get that opportunity again for awhile...
🐻 "Looks like your daddy didn't teach you how to properly handle your weapons... Wouldnt make that mistake me... No, i, would, not." "And anyway, right... Somethin else i wanna know yeah... What kind of father yeah, what kind of fuckin father sends his little girl to the arse end of Camden Town to deal with his fuckin problems?" "You want my advice little girl, if i were you I'd stay right here, with this here mad old man... Cause i reckon he would know how to take care of you properly..."
🐻 So you have a choice, give into the feelings and desires which have been plaguing you since you first met him, or spit in his face and tell him you'd rather die... And this is a man who just might offer you deal or death, thats how much he's his heart and mind set on you.
🐻 "Oh and Tommy, Tommy my old mate, did i tell you, just a little warning yeah, and i know you wouldnt ever think about crossing your dear old friend right but... If that thought ever does come flittering and fluttering into your whimsical gypsy boy brain... Just remember, ive got Mafia connections these days right... So i wouldnt if i were you... "
Arthur
🍂 Shits himself when he sees you pull a gun on a man in one of the Shelby bars in London.
🍂 Arthurs been sent to keep control of them and here you are, a fucking woman... With your gun raised to the eyes of one of his patrons.
🍂 When he steps in "alright alright is someone gonna tell me what the fuck is going on here?" and you answer him cold and simple "This english pig called me a very unpleasant slur and that... Mr Shelby, i won't tolerate..."
🍂 You shoot the man in the head right there in front of everyone. Screaming errupts and chaos and panic set in but you just stand there, strong arm still outstretched. Finger still on the trigger.
🍂 Arthur just gapes at you in shock, hes never seen a woman shoot someone, the fact that youre so glamourous looking too... From afar hed have mistaken you for one of the toffee nosed london elites who usually come to dance and drink in his bars because theyve heard they are dangerous and riddled with gangsters.
🍂 But now it seems, he recognises that accent of yours, turns out youre the gangster.
🍂 "Sorry about the mess Mr Shelby," you give him a quick smile and knock the body on the floor with your foot and turn to leave.
🍂 "Well, hang on a minute love hang on a minute you can't just..." "let me stop you there Mr Shelby..." hes not heard that slanted italian american accent on a woman before but he likes it, "i ain't your love... And i can actually... The evidence is soaking blood into your beautifully varnished floor..."
🍂 He gets into a lot of trouble with Tommy for letting you slip off unpunished, for letting the whole thing happen in the first place...but arthur doesnt see how he could have done anything different.
🍂"You weren't fuckin there Tommy, you didnt fuckin see her..."
🍂 He spends a lot of time tormented with daydreams of you, wants to see you again because hes got it bad for you... Even has a particularly steamy dream about fucking you whilst you hold your gun to his head.
🍂 So when you come back to his bar not a week later with a little white flag you made yourself, hes stunned and speechless and he doesnt know what to say. You say youve come to offer him a peace offering, just between you and him.
Its a little white flag and a little vile of white powder which is his on the condition that he shares it with you.
🍂 So you end up getting high together and fucking, and recreating that hot and heavy dream of his.
John
🌼 Deeply suspicious of you, doesn't trust the italians. You aren't pleasant to eachother to begin with at all.
🌼 You refuse to call eachother by name, hes a "pikey" you're a "wop" and thats that. You resent eachother.
🌼 Which is a shame because Tommy only introduced you before the wedding as an act of mercy to his little brother...
🌼 When you walk down the aisle dressed in white, veil covering your scowl John feels his heart freeze.
🌼 Of course he can't be too unhappy, you are fucking stunning... Your olive skin, your long dark hair, theres something almost virgin Mary about you, especially when youre all in white and pure...
🌼 And you would be lying if you tried to pretend you didnt find the gypsy boy to be good looking. His freckles are cute. He's strong, bulkier than any of those italian boys that have been sucking up to your father hoping for your hand all these years. John looks like a man who might be able to handle you
🌼 But hes still a pikey and youre still a wop and you refuse to say a word to him the whole day of your wedding. You fucking hate your father and you fucking hate tommy shelby
🌼 And in the end thats what draws you and John together. Mutual resentment for the men who forced you together.
🌼 Consumating the marriage is intense... When youre alone together youre both pretty much pretending you don't want it, spitting insults at eachother, hate in your eyes as he backs you up against the wall and you tell him youd sooner die than let a fucking pikey get his hands on you.
🌼 Pisses him off "That can be arranged love don't you fuckin worry," the two of you reaching for your guns at the same time. Challenging eachother, neither one of you backing down, eyes locked, fingers on triggers.
🌼Until something overwhelms you both at once and you can't resist anymore. When you come together its violent and explosive. John enjoys the thought hes tarnishing you, taking your purity, vandalising your virginal self... And you enjoy being fucked against the wall, your hands squeezing his throat, choking him.
🌼 After this the dust begins to settle on your hatred for one another... Youre more united against Tommy and your father than you are against eachother. But you like to keep up the pretence. Its like a fun game you have, pretending to hate eachother then having intense the most intense sex when youre alone. Youre always trying to push the boundaries, testing eachother.
🌼 You still affectionately refer to eachother by your respective slurs but see if anyone else ever tried it... If anyone ever called you a wop, john would put a bullet in them quicker than lightnight, and if anyone ever insulted him for his blood, youd be the one firing your gun.
🌼 John enjoys the way people fear you, he likes having a dangerous wife by his side.
🌼 You like having a dangerous man by your side, one who isn't so sleezy and american and preocupied with their looks... You think hes a real man.
Bonnie
🍀 Poor sweet innocent boy has no idea who you are when he first meets you... And thats partly your fault because you do lie to him.
🍀Youre actually sick of people being so scared of you, you dont think they are really scared of you, you think they are scared of your father... Which isnt fair... Its making it impossible to find a man and pretty soon youre certain your fathers going to arrange your marriage to some sleeze in another mafia family for the good of the lineage anyway
🍀 When you meet Bonnie Gold after one of his fights which Ada Shelby snuck you into, he has no idea about your family, but you know everything about his... And you see one thing in him...
🍀 Escape. You don't want to be a mafia princess anymore. Like Ada you want to shed your family name and be your own person.
🍀 So when you're introduced after the fight you beg him to take you away, to help you dissappear. And him being naive and you being very fucking pretty, he's more than happy to oblige.
🍀 After his fight the two of you disappear together for several weeks, hes no idea of the trouble hes getting himself into, and youre naively trying to pretend this can last forever
🍀You love the nomadic life style, the not knowing where you'll be tomorrow or a week from now, the knowing that nobody can find you, that no one you meet knows a single thing about you. And you like the simplicity too...
🍀Bonnie can tell that youre hiding something from him but he isnt sure what and he trusts that youll tell him eventually... For you to be friends with Ada Shelby, for you to have been so desperate to get away from London... He knows that you have a darkness inside you... But like i said he trusts you... And he's seen a soft and innocent side to you.
🍀Over the weeks you spend travelling together you grow closer and closer. At night you sleep under the stars, wrapped up together in his big coat with a blanket over you both. In the morning you awake with the birds and he teaches you to hunt and to cook wild rabbit. You fall for eachother slowly. When you share your first kiss you feel guilty, you almost cry and he can tell youre upset.
🍀 "Don't be sad little dove, i know you're keeping secrets, i don't mind... You can tell me all your secrets when you're ready,"
🍀 When you return he takes you to meet his father, to tell him you want to be married, that youre in love which makes Aberama laugh. He thinks it hilarious because he can tell that his son still has no idea who you are.
🍀"Well miss youve certainly caused a lot of trouble without trying haven't you..." it turns out your father didnt take kindly to your disappearence.. The italians have been threatening the whole country trying to find you...
🍀 Bonnie is surprised, but quietly pleased... Not just with himself for having a mafia princess fall in love with him, but also because hes in awe of your defiance, this trick youve played on everyone including him... He thought you were sweet and innocent but here you are, a mafia princess whos brought the whole underground crime scene in britain to a grinding halt.
🍀 "Do you hate me Bon? I lied to you... Could get you fuckin killed? I understand if you never want to..." "Don't finish that sentence little dove," him hushing you, hand holding your cheek, thumb to your lips, "Don't need to finish that sentence," kissing you softly is the only answer you need.
🍀The first time he sees you pull a gun on anyone the man in question is your own father. Hes come to bring you home but you wont go... Bonnie is there as a peaky boy, standing with Michael and Isaiah watching and keeping his mouth shut. He knows hes dead if anyone clocks who he is. Your father threatens to kill every gypsy boy he meets until he finds the one whose stolen you... But you stand your ground.
🍀 "i wont lose my daughter to a fucking pikey..." "Then tell people I'm dead," you turn the gun on yourself your eyes locked with your father, your burning with defiance, a truly formidable lass, "I'd sooner blow my own brains out than continue to call you my fucking father..."
🍀 And its the fact he cant tell if youre bluffing that makes him back down. He gives in but tells you that theres no backing out, he'll tell the whole world youre dead, but you are dead, to him, theres no coming back. But you don't back down.
🍀"Your girls a fuckin terror Bonnie lad, hope youre going to tame her," Isaiah laughing eith Michael after the whole affair. "I fucken won't," Bonnies pretty much stubborn about that, he loves your defiance and hes proud cause he knows Isaiah and Michael are secretly terrified of you. Women who don't fear death are the most formidable creatures.
🍀 "You're incredible dove, that was incredible..." "but... You promise me now, you'll never point one of these things at that pretty little head of yours ever again..."
Isaiah
🐀Definitely bitten off more than he can chew. He's in love with you before he even realises whats happened to him.
🐀Doesn't know what to do with himself because for all his arrogance and confidence, he knows a girl of mafia blood is so far out of his league.
🐀Youre in London because your father has business with Tommy Shelby, and your father refuses to travel to the shithole which is Birmigham
🐀You came along for the legal drinking, the shopping and to see what all the fuss about "English" men was...
🐀And you don't think much of any of them at first... Most have them are a little ugly, badly dressed, dirty, with funny accents... And Isaiah has a funny accent but, he's good looking, and he has the cocky nature of any american boy youve ever met.
🐀He gets tasked with chaperoning you much to your delight... Less to your delight you know that one of your fathers men is trailing you too, just to make sure nothing bad happens, that this Peaky Boy doesnt try anything funny with you.
🐀You find it all bitterly amusing, youre a woman, not a mouse. If this Peaky Boy wants to try anything funny with you, just let him try, its you who will see to it he doesn't get very far...
🐀Although the idea of getting up to no good with an english gangster, one your father hates... Well its appealing to say the least. You're a bit of a brat, used to getting your own way, used to doing as you please and facing little consequences later...
🐀So you suggest to your new peaky boy that you both lose your dads man, you ask him to take you through the back streets until your fathers men can't find you... And isaiah knows he shouldnt but hes sensed the mood youre in and he cant pass up the opportunity to go too far with you. He wants to get into trouble with you... He has a feeling that Mafia girls fuck harder, more dangerously.
🐀"You wanna get into trouble Peaky Boy? My father will kill you for this? Aren't you scared?" "Not fuckin scared of anyone me sweetheart," "Fine, do your worst Peaky Boy..."
🐀It doesnt last too long because you don't have much time but its hot and heavy and rough... And its the best you've ever had, maybe thats just the adrenaline of knowing youre up to know good, the adrenaline of risking someone elses life for your own pleasure...
🐀And you do get caught, you suppose if you were being honest with yourself then you'd always known you would be.
🐀You get caught with Isaiahs cock still inside you, he's fucking you against the wall and youre not even being that quiet about it... your fathers man goes to shoot at Isaiah but you get there first, your shot killing your fathers man in a second...
🐀Isaiah is stunned, almost drops you but he doesnt want to dissapoint you so he tightens his grip, hes scared too, youre in so much fucking trouble and if anyone finds out what just happened Tommy will kill him before your father does...
🐀"Don't go soft on me Peaky Boy I'm only just getting started..." you practically growl, grinding your hips into his, and Isaiah isnt about to let you go, so he channels is fear and his amazement into fucking you twice as hard, growling to you about how much trouble youre going to get him into.
🐀But obviously its fucking worth it.
🐀You make him take you shopping afterwards and you return to your father with so many pretty dresses and shoes. A new red lipstick too.
🐀He obviously wants to know what happened, why his man hasn't returned with you and you speak before Isaiah can...
🐀"oh did you have someone following me daddy? We didn't notice anyone? Did you Isaiah?" the boy cant believe what hes hearing right now, youre asking him to lie not just to your father, but his own boss too... Still he does, after that day hes sure hed do anything you asked him to.
🐀You also make up a little story of your own, about how you were threatened by a man, someone tried to disresepct your dignity, you tell him Isaiah took his eyes for the insult and your father is quite satisfied that Tommys boy can keep you safe... So next time you want to go out, your father makes the condition that Isaiah has to go with you.
🐀Which you're quite happy with.
🐀"Youre gonna be the death of me love,"
🐀 So much of the time youre the one causing problems, getting yourself into scraps, because youre used to being a mafia princess, no one back home would dare say a word to you but over here so many of the men don't understand who you are... You wont stand for their shit
🐀So Isaiah does end up taking peoples eyes for you... Most of the time however its you that does the killing. Youre a real violent little brat it doesnt take much for you to decide to pull that trigger...
🐀Isaiah hasnt told any of his mates about what the two of you get up to when you get eachother alone... Its difficult for him to keep this to himself, usually he'd be bragging to high heaven about laying a woman like you... But he's keeping quiet because he knows it'll be you who kills him if he speaks.
Michael
☘️Meets you in America when hes been sent away by tommy... Hes harbouring that bitterness towards his cousin when he finds himself in dealings with the mafia on his brothers behalf.
☘️His life in America is good... He might not be there of his own free will, he might not be allowed to come back, but hes making it work, hes a feared gangster, a powerful and dangerous man
☘️And hes starting to get ideas above his station... Hes met you several times, youre always in his speakeasies drinking, getting snowed up and demanding Shelby gin on the house, your name affords you everything you want after all
☘️And he thinks you're another one of those pretty, espensive things he'd like to add to his collection.
☘️Youd be a real status changer for him, he could use you to win his feud with Tommy, finally be more powerful than his cousin...
☘️ And you're attracted to the brooding English man who runs this part of the city... He does dealings with your father so you know hes a real player in this game, hes dangerous too... And perhaps the only man arrogant enough not to fear the barrel of your fathers gun.
☘️Youve been going to Michaels bars and acting out, getting too drunk and causing fights because you want to get his attention. Its a childish way to attract a man but you know men like Michael Gray, you know that what they want is a possession, something they can tame, put in its place. Teach to be obedient. They like the challenge and secretly they like it when a woman threatens their ego and misbehaves.
☘️And you're right, youve read him like a book... He approaches you one evening at the bar and well, hes stern, hes aggressive, hes almost... Almost fucking rude to you...
☘️ "Miss y/l/n I'd like a word..." "Take your pick Mr Gray, how about two, fuck... Off..." "Don't test me love... You're going to come back to my office with me now, youre going to come quietly and then we're going to talk... And we can talk nicely or you can keep up with whatever this childish little act is alright? But you're going to come with me and we're going to have a little chat alright about the kind of behaviour which is and isnt acceptable in my establishment... "
☘️"Who the fuck do you think you are Mr Gray... Do you have any idea who i am?" "I know youre a little mafia brat with no manners... Anything else?"
☘️ Drags you by the wrist into his office where he practically pushes you down into a chair.
☘️ Stands before you and actually lectures you about your behaviour... About how he isnt going to stand for it anymore...
☘️" So whatre you going to do about it Mr Gray?" youre so cheeky, a real brat, but youre being provocative too... You know what you want from him and as you speak you open your legs just enough to catch his attention.
☘️ "So youre a whore as well as a brat are you?" this actually shocks you, you flush a little but youre idignant and you hold your ground. "Is that what you'd like me to be Mr Gray?"
☘️ He's going to teach you to behave, one way or another... And the only way he manages to is by fucking you into submission... Thats the only way he can get you to behave yourself for him, the only way he can make you beg his forgiveness...
☘️ Outside of the bedroom though youre still a spoilt brat and he doesnt help the fact, he buys you gifts, courts you properly, makes all the right moves on both you and your father
☘️Until eventually your father is convincrd that marrying you off to Michael Gray is the best business move he could possibly make.
☘️ So youre handed over to him on a silver fucking platter and though you pretend to remain defiant "Dont think this means I'm going to behabe myself Mr Gray..." secretly youre thrilled, this is exactly what you wanted.
☘️You want him to take you back to england with him, you want to meet the infamous Tommy Shelby... And when he finally takes you "home" dont be surprised hes showing you off like a pretty piece of jewellery...
☘️And should he really be surprised when Tommy catches your eye, when you realise that there are men more rich, more powerful and more dangerous than Michael Gray for you to persue.
☘️Threatens you, "you fuckin touch my cousin you little brat, I'll kill you..." but this jealousy, this new passion in him turns you on and so you find yourself caught trying to balance two men. Youre being selfish, youre taking everything you want, no matter who gets hurt.
Hope you liked them lovely ❤️❤️
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androcola · 2 months
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Tell us more about the unkees 🥺?
ok sorry for leaving this here ive been super poo brained and can't think worth a shit uuhhhmmm ok.
i know that, because of all their differences, they have this ability to work as something of a Mega uncle, one big unit. like one ultimate uncle. the girls are Extremely close with them all, theyre all godfathers to them, I'm sure.
i have a feeling the guys tend to get weird stares from people, though. Anytime the kids are with them snd either one of them mentions they're All their uncles, the stares they get are strange snd sometimes even unkind. it doesn't bother any of them at all, although the weeks the girls stay over, they probably get interrogated by some of the other kids at school when they see a bunch of white guys coming to pick them up from school 😭
they're all super fun, though. and thankfully they came around about the time that mike was getting out of that crisis time in his life, so I think he's glad for that, that they can know him as stable and happy and for the most part, healthy. I don't think they ever learn of his past. msybe a few glimpses here ame there, but nothing that ever leaves them scared or concerned foe him or feeling bad for him.
although Mike is considerably healed of his traumas and managing his mental illness well by the time they're teenagers, he still has his off days which sometimes worries one or both of them, and also he kinda has a bad habit of projecting his traumas onto them, causing him to be extremely protective and a little overbearing .he's always sorta been that way, so they don't know anything different.
Janie, the older of the two girls, ends up bonding especially closely with Mike, none of them really know how it happened, but it happened. She's a lot like her uncle Micky, however. Very outgoing, friendly and ready to meet people and just do all kinds of things, so she loves to drag her poor shy uncle around to do things with her.
Cici on the other hand is a bit more withdrawn, kinda like Mike or Peter. she prefers to sit and read or just take things slow. she doesn't have a favorite, but can often be seen hanging out with Peter as he's very mellow ans just delightful to be around.
Peter is definitely the hippie uncle, real cool and mellow, will gladly go out just for a night of stargazing or quiet drives around town. He's great for advice. really they all are, but his advice is always very wise and almost never comes from any personal traumas, as he doesn't attach his thoughts to something like that, so usually his advice is very central amd level headed.
Micky and Davy are always competing for the title of Cool Uncle. they're much more relaxed on certain things amd love to have a fun time with the girls. pf course, they've always got uncle mike in their ear about "please be careful! don't keep them out too late! don't do that! don't tell them that!" etc etc. Davy is really good for dating advice, he's seen it all before. once the girls hit their teen years and start noticing other people, things get a little bit messy, but anytime something goes wrong , they alwsys know they have uncle davy to tuen to :)
uncle Mike and peter are known as the more boring ones. they'd rather sit and do a puzzle or play little games! :) and mike can be so bothersome with his Early As Fuck trips to the grocery store that he'll definitely wake them up for to come with him😭 he says he Likes to beat the crowds! shy uncle mike.
although Mike always urges that they Shouldn't spoil the kids, they ALL spoil them so badly, especially mike, even though he's the one who says not to. another projection of his traumas I think. he didn't have anything growing up so he wants them to have Everything. he and the lthers all get very carried away
the girls spent a summer with them once in 1984. they came back home with BOAT LOADS of new toys , clothes , jewelry and pretty things, much to the stress of their parents.
the pad is like a play house for the girls. theres always some level of excitement going on.tjeyre always asking to visit the uncles, and the uncles are always very welcoming, even if sometimes mike gets a little stressed
all together they're one big wonderful unit for the two girls, always so protective and loving of them. Although I don't think the girls learn they aren't related to 3/4 of them until they just figure it out on their own when they're young adults. the boys always would kinda dance around questions of family relation, always just telling them that Family comes in all different shapes and sizes and you don't have to look the same to be family! they all speak deeply from the heart when they say that.
eventually though the girls do find out, but it doesn't mean anything to them , though. Their uncles have always been there for them through everything and have never failed to show their undying love. truly blood just doesn't matter
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Text
writing this on a whim because my brain is torturing me about it for some reason and i figured what better place to go than tumblr [this is somewhat sarcasm]. i do not particularly know why i am writing/asking this but im chucking it out there to ease the thoughts so i can go to sleep
to any systems or whatever or really anyone reading who found this through the tags i put here, how did you know you were a system. or plural or how did you start questioning it how did you figure it out. bear with me its past 2 am my writing is atrocious . how did you know if you never knew before?
i dont think im plural, but something wormed its way into my brain today or yesterday and i dont know why or when and and its not the first time this has popped into my brain i think. the thought of what if what if what if but im me. its my me it there its me its my thoughts and there is no other people in my brain just me myself and i. its not quiet it never is but it is just me
i think a clearer question i want to ask is: how can you tell if something is just dpdr[because i fear i may have that, unfortunately it is very likely] or this? this as in osdd or did or whatever
it would appear simple but unfortunately for a lot of my life my sense of self has been so broken and so messy because. fuck all everything happening i guess but its just me, truly. i talk to myself, i draw different versions of myself together, i split myself into many parts to cope with things, to highlight the different parts of me, variants. the wolf, the puppy, the robot, the hermit, the hollow, the dragon, and whatever the Me is i dont know who or what i am when im so many things and nothing at the same time. i didnt completely think about this but also how heavily i relate to certain characters in media but this may just be a nonhuman thing. i see so much of myself in certain characters and so much of them in me sometimes to the point where i dont know where i start and they end. but again i think that is just a nonhuman thing or a coping thing. because its still just me here
where does the age regression and nonhumanity start and where does it end when i rely on my creations of myself to keep me afloat. i only talk to myself through thinking and drawing, i dont talk to anybody else in my head, its all me. and unfortunately theres a pattern where i learn of something and i think about it and i go, "oh, no, no no, that is absolutely not me, never would dream of it! even thinking that i could be that is a crime to all the ones that truly have that!" and then it ends up being too true. the depression, the adhd, the age regression, the therianthropy, the hard denial of abuse, the hard denial of possible autism. my friends speculate i have ptsd or cptsd. i dont want to go down that line of thinking with this, i *know* i dont have it, but the fear
its annoying because ive never really been here present in my body im never really here and the horrors dont end and theres always been something wrong with me but i know its other things. i wont share the details, but the situation ive been in the past 8? months has been horrible horrid no good on my brain i hate being awake. and it feels like someone else took the reins but im still feeling the hurt i still have the memories but they dont feel like mine. my memories have never felt like my own but theyre mine and i have to write everything down or i will forget. i go to work i listen to family shit on me i go to work i do something all day but its not me im still in my room playing a game in my pjs but that was almost a year ago but im still there but i went to work but it wasnt me
because my mind is empty, its just me. it really truly is just me. i think im just lonely. and hoping someone could take me away from everything im always going through or for someone to be there. in my head
there was never anything to make me think this before, a couple times i have but years ago, for no reason, im quite sure its just me. i had imaginary friends as a kid which is normal for kids. i still kind of do but its just me talking to me, im saying two things. i think i just have a lot of possible trauma[i dont believe im traumatized but my friends are quite firm that my entire life has been a shitshow since i was born] and a lot of coping mechanisms plus the fact that i have to pretend for my family and me being trans and me being nonhuman and me so its mostly just that
i dont really know what exactly im even asking. i think im just throwing out a bone and praying for someone to go "yeah dude thats normal youre fine, youre normal" and for my brain to stop ruminating and its annoying. or for someone to ease my curiosity and fear and dread. im throwing out a bone, im begging for someone to glance my way, im begging for someone to tell me its okay. not the begging to be okay but to say that my brain is okay and that my life is okay
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ninjapaste · 5 months
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dude your art is so GOOD!!! Do you take any classes or have any tips to share? that resource post you reblogged the other day was helpful but i've felt so stuck in my art. I don't know if you have anything u learned that just made something click for u or anything like that?
Tysm anon!!!👍
In terms of your questions, I apologise i advance for the long answer im about to give and possibly things you already know haha:
I guess in terms of what classes i take, Ive gone from GCSE to A level Art and design (Fine art), and both courses have helped me to learn the importance of observation studies.
However, its moreso all the art i practice in my own time that has played the biggest part in my art improvement journey. I adopted art as a big hobby around 2018, and really ever since then I tend to draw/create for myself every day, however big or small it may be.
I guess my first tip would be to indulge in a 'sketchbook' or space to work in freely, it could be any form but the importance is that its personal and can be picked up whenever. I find that having a sketchbook to draw in has really helped with productivity and creating new ideas. I think you can go into a sketchbook space with any mindset and it can work wonders, like for example if you wanted to focus purely on challenging yourself, you can do that! If you just, want to doodle without thinking, go ahead! After all, its a sketchbook for you and nobody else, so go wild!
My next tip would definitely be, when you are feeling stuck in art, to take inspiration from a wide range of different things be it in real life or on the internet, a building or a really cool tree, since I find it defintiely fuels the creation of new ideas/concepts that can provide a path out of that creative rut. I guess to an extent there may always be periods where you have that 'I have no idea what to draw!' Feeling, and thats okay! Sometimes its refreshing that helps the most. But I often see that the solution to being in a rut is usually REFERENCING, wether it be trying to accurately draw the anatomy of an arm or if I just saw a cool design/pose/style on Pinterest and i drew a bunch of wacky characters from it. In fact, I find that places like Pinterest or Resplash are such good resources to hone imagination and generally most art skills by looking at and drawinf from all the cool images (and get some of that inspo!). And if im not using Pinterest, im usually using an art book as reference! (The itsv and splatoon art book helped me so so much lol)
On the topic of REFERENCING, its mega important! Depending on imagination/memory feels pretty good at times but its always beneficial to have image references in your process when you find its good to have them. I woudl always recommend having a reference when drawing poses/expressions/anatomy because the more you use them, the more you learn about how an object like a face muscle, a torso or even light behaves and looks and the easier it is to draw/depict them.
The next tip is uh YOUTUBE, or any account/person who's art inspires you in particular. I found that certain channels like Ethan Becker, Marc Brunet, Marco Bucci and more have helped me the most to gain confidence in drawing and learning how to practice it better. Of course, theres a lot to learn from a plethora of other channels too, even ones that dont specifically promote themselves as teachers! Also, if theres a certain style/art approach or an artist that appeals to you, study it in any way you like! Analyse an artist's work or ask/find out about their personal process (or even watch a speedpaint/art stream)! Sometimes it can be a big inspiration booster and skill boost to do just that (plus the 'artist' could be any piece of media/thing too!! Like a game or something).
Ok ok last paragraph haha, on the topic of your last question. Thinking back, its hard for me to define any specific moment or thing that gave me a 'click' moment. Its more like a process of growth that starts with learning and understanding a new thing, then familiarizing myself with using it successfully/'correctly' by studying and practicing, so that eventually its like muscle memory or easier to use in my work.
Hope this helps!!! If theres anything else you want to ask, dont be afraid to dm or send another ask!!
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astarionancuntnin · 26 days
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✨Writing Interview Tag Game✨
Thank you for the tag @nyx-knox!! <33
When did you start writing?
Like wayyyyyyyyy back, I technically wrote my first story when i was 11. I didn't write again until i was 15 (original pieces + fanfics), then i stopped and Im back at it again at 26 ayoooo
Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write?
if i really need to search further into my favorite books, i would definitely say psychological horror and dramas
Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often?
I don't know writers enough to really get an idea of how to compare myself to any of them, but I do know that i tend to emulate what i'm exposed to, so if I read an entire series from an author, and they used a certain syntax, i'll tend to also do it by force of habit. (i also consider it a flaw cause i see it as hindering my writing creativity ;-;)
Can you tell me a bit about your writing space?
its my personal pc that doubles as my work space, so its a bit all over the place ngl haha, theres a lot of astarion stickers and posters, all the furniture (keyboard, mouse, desk, etc) is pastel purple (my favorite colour), i have three screens (mostly for work but its also useful in day to day life) and my three wallpapers are astarion, of course. sometimes when i feel a writers block, i found out that writing on my laptop does unblock me! in that case, youll find me typing away on my couch in my living room uwu
What's your most effective way to muster up a muse?
MUSIC. What I write will be highly dependent on what I listen at the moment, like I was really into boywithuke when i wrote my angsty fics, and then i moved to a dark romance playlist and that got me going for die for you but then i was unable to continue my other fic cause i wasnt in an angsty mood anymore ._. (i swear i didnt abandon it, it just isnt the playlists turn to play on repeat) and rn im a lot into sleep token and ari abdul
Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you?
So. Much. Smut. And angst. not surprising! my writing will also often depict my current state of mind. dw im in therapy, im working on it
What is your reason for writing?
It's my favorite creative output/the one im most experienced in! i wanna start drawing but i never find the time to really get into it and also terrified of failure which brings me to my second reason, its all i think i can do and i get dopanine reading nice comments teehee
Is there any specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating?
when people tell me about a favourite part, when they liked the tension i managed to create, how i convey some characters, and most of all when i get told they loved a character i created!! this is so encouraging and pushes me to continue <3
How do you want to be thought about by your readers?
i dont know how to answer to that .-. uh, i guess i want to be liked? seen as a good writer if anything? idk man ;-;
What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?
Definitely descriptions, and creating a build up in a scene. I feel like it comes naturally to me and people have often told me that they are never lost when reading my scenes which reassures me so much LMAO I feel validated I also think I make really fun dialogue, especially banter with my ocs/tavs
How do you feel about your own writing?
i often self criticise my own work a lot, and i get that imposter syndrome where ill reread my work before posting and go "what the hell" in those moments, im grateful im not writing on paper cause that sheet would find its way to the trash real quick ^^ ' im sincerely truly blessed that my partner offers himself to read my pieces and beta read them, and tell me his honest opinion (there are things i wrote i wish i could forget and yall better be thankful he was there to stop me from posting first versions)
When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely for yourself, or a mix of both?
mix of both definitely. initially i wrote my own ideas and if people do end up liking them hell yeah!!! glad im able to find people that vibe the same way i do! then again, when i write for people, even if most of it comes from my silly little imagination, it was initially influenced by the request itself and is going to guide the writing specific to this piece, which honestly makes sense imo
Tagging 🏷️: @marlowethebard @roguishcat @anacdoce @charmandabear @marimosalad
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five-rivers · 1 year
Text
Cryptid Crawl! 8
“You can’t blame me for this,” said Danny.  “Literally, you can’t blame me for our plan working too well.”  There was a high-pitched whine from his end of the Fenton Phones, and a small explosion.
Jazz pinched the bridge of her nose.  “I know, I know, I’m not trying to play the blame game, but you need to get back here.  You’re the only one who can handle the ghosts.”
“I’m not–” Danny broke off, briefly.  “I’m not going to be able to take care of the ghosts.  I promised them that they could have cake if they stayed away from the hunters.  They did, and Ember helped even more.  I can’t go back on that promise now!”
“Okay, but the hunters are coming here.  What are we going to do about the ghosts then?  Even if we convince them they’re all in costume, they’re too good as costumes!  It would be too cool!”
“I think you’re still overestimating the coolness of costumes,” said Tucker.  “It’s an easy mistake to make, I know I–”
“Miss Fenton?  Jasmine?  Oh, there you are,” said Mr. Lancer, sounding relieved.  “No one had seen you since you went to talk to the ghosts, and– What’s wrong?”
Jazz scrubbed her hands over her face and stepped out of the little cubby the end of the row of lockers formed with the oddly-bent corner of the wall.  “We got the two shows to give up, but they’re coming here instead, for, I don’t know, cake as a consolation prize.  I don’t– I don’t know what to do about the ghosts.  They’ll be here in less than fifteen minutes.  I don’t know what to do.”
“Oh,” said Mr. Lancer.  “Twelfth Night, we’re in it now.”
.
AMITY OF AMITY PARK: A Friendly Helping Hand
Ghost Activity Map, Forums, Local Business Directory, Advice Blog
Forums -> Community Alerts -> Paranormal Investigators -> Community Cake Day
Thread: EMERGENCY
12th Knight (OP): The paranormal investigators are coming to the Community Cake Day.  The ghosts are at Community Cake Day.  What do we do?”
Cynosure: I can’t believe you’re posting on the forums while this is going on.
12th Knight: I am a desperate man.  
JACK FENTON: THEY’RE AT THE CAKE DAY?  DOn’T WORRY WE”LL savE YUl!!@@#
JACK FENTON: AND EaT ACKE!
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Mr. Lancer looked up from his phone.  “In retrospect, I feel as if I should have known better than to ask advice from the internet.”
“Jazz,” said Danny, “why did Dad pull out his phone, shout cake, and start running away?”
Jazz would not hold her breath until she fainted.  She wasn’t even sure that was a thing people could do. 
“Okay,” said Sam, “ignoring that disturbing comment and why Jazz didn’t answer, I–  Tucker, what are you doing?”
“He got in again!  How did he get in again?”
“Jazz, are they going to cake day?  Why are they going to cake day?  They cannot be at cake day!”
.
Tubahater: Could you maybe disguise the ghosts??
The Smart Twin:  As what?  With what?  There’s no way they’re going to look like anything but ghosts.
CasperQueen: There’s always the drama stuff, I guess, assuming it wasn’t all destroyed when a certain someone fell into it, like a loser.
Lovestheshow: oooh yeah, I love that trope
Lovestheshow: the one where a character dresses up like a crappy version of themselves 
Lovestheshow: yes please tell me you’re going to do it!
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“Oh, heck,” said Tucker, “Nost actually has a point.  How is it that the guy who thinks the whole thing is an ARG has a point?”
At this, Jazz pulled out her own phone.  “Does he have a point?” she asked.  
“Anyone want to fill me in?” asked Danny.  “Kind of busy flying.”
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West of West: Unfortunately, I know for a fact that people are stupid and blind enough to fall for this.
Point25Back: aren’t you supposed to be whipping butter nerd?
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“Why are all my students on their phones when they’re supposed to be baking?” asked Lancer.
“You’re on your phone,” pointed out Jazz.  
.
West of West: Aren’t you supposed to be banned
Nobineryginger: oh ye dude i get you theres all sorts of great tropes like that my faves the one where everyone is dressed the same at a party and so when the baddies try to find the heroes they gotta unmask everyone but its all just normal people its like a switcheroo so sweet
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“I can’t believe it, they do have a point,” said Jazz, out loud.
“Please, can someone fill me in?  At least on what I can do?  I’m still trying to distract, but– Ah!  I can disengage whenever you want me!”
“Keep distracting them for now, but be ready to, uh,” she looked up at Mr. Lancer, “be yourself but not be yourself again, and to say that you’re a different yourself than the yourself they met.”
“I hate that I understood that,” said Danny.  
“Okay,” said Jazz, “we need the drama class.”
.
[Video starts, showing a crowd of people of various ages in a school cafeteria.  Most of the people are either children or middle aged.  There are several people sitting at the front of the room.  Static obscures many of their features, but they all appear to be glowing and have odd skin tones.  The video is shaky.
WOMAN #1: Damn, I should have gotten a better camera, this one is spazzing out.  But the phone one is bad, too…
The angle of the camera changes slightly, and shows a low-angle profile of a woman.
WOMAN #2: Bought it out of town?
WOMAN #1: Yeah, why?
WOMAN #2: Takes a while for them to get used to the ectoplasm.  Give it a week and it’ll be fine.
WOMAN #1: That doesn’t help much now.  I wanted to film Ashley breaking a world record.
WOMAN #2: I’m sure someone else is filming, too.  You could ask around, later.
A door in the corner of the cafeteria opens, and the camera turns towards them.  A group of teenagers comes out.  One of them, a girl with long red hair and a large amount of flour on her shirt, is carrying a megaphone.  
TEENAGER: Hello, Amity Park!  I know you’re looking forward to cake, but we have an additional surprise for you all.  This is now a costume party!  The drama class will be bringing you your costumes shortly.  Thank you for cooperating and making this Community Cake Day a success.
The teenager lowers the microphone, and joins the other teenagers, who have started swarming the glowing people.
WOMAN #2: When was the last time you checked the forums?
Video ends.]
.
Danny dropped through the ceiling into the bathroom and transformed.  He pulled back on the fake hazmat and grimaced as he noticed a tear.  Maybe he could– Could he do a partial?  He’d never done a partial like that before on purpose–
“There you are!” shouted Jazz.  
“Oh gosh,” said Danny.  “This is the boy’s ba–”
“That doesn’t matter!  Come on!”
“But there’s a tear–”
Jazz shrieked in frustration and shoved a fake Danny Phantom top at him.  The gloves and belt were sewn on, and it looked very crooked.  
“Where did this even come from?” he whispered.  “Did you make this?”
“No, there were about fifty of them backstage of the theater, but no one fit this one.  It’s too small.”
Danny, who had gotten it on over his head with no effort, glared at her, but then the rest of her words sank in.  “Fifty?  Why does the drama class have fifty of these?”
“I don’t want to know, do you?  If it makes you feel better, it was right next to the surplus Ember stuff.”
It did not make Danny feel better.  
Even so, he let Jazz continue to herd him into the cafeteria and then sit him between Lunch Lady (dusted in flour and looking very pleased with herself) and Kitty, which was really unfair, he thought.  At least it wasn’t between Spectra and Skulker.  
“Jazz,” said Danny, eyeing the cafeteria.  “Do you want to tell me the plan, now?”
“I would also like to know the plan,” said Kitty, who was currently wearing cat ears and badly done facepaint.
“You’re all just people dressing up as ghosts,” said Jazz, “like mascots.  Because it will get you free cake.  Danny, you’re not the same person they ran into earlier, got it?  You’re someone different.”
Danny definitely needed a few quiet minutes to process all this, but it almost, sort of, kind of, made sense.  “We’re making them think everyone is a fake.  Just more fake ghosts.  Not even original fake ghosts.”
“Yeah,” said Jazz.
“But– But what about Mom and Dad?  You know what they’re like.”
“Don’t worry about it,” said Jazz.  
“I’m worrying about it.”
“Don’t.”
“I’m worrying about it, too, actually,” said Sam, who sounded very out of breath.  “Any of you guys seen Val and Dani yet?”
“No,” said Danny.  They must still be at the hospital.
“Listen,” said Jazz, “someone else will take care of it.  You just sit here and eat cake.”
“Isn’t that what Marie Antoinette said?” asked Danny.  
Jazz made a face.  “You really do only know the one historical quote, don’t you?”
“Heh, she’s got you there,” said Kitty.  
“And you do need to eat more,” said Lunch Lady, pinching his cheek.
“Fine,” said Danny, “but don’t blame me when things go wrong with whatever you’re planning!”
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babiebom · 1 year
Text
Abigail Headcanons
I had wrote some of these for my old blog but forgot to save them so i forgot what i wrote and now I have to start over haha
Tw: cursing, brief sexual mention, cheating(not abby), some canon info may be wrong lmao
Is between 5'4-5'8
Mostly because she does give off tall goth mommy vibes but also gives off short angry troll vibes(I'm 4'11 I'm allowed to say this)
I think she's like 22-24
It's stayed at some point that she takes online college classes right? Or am i insane?
I do 100% think she's the wizards daughter I mean it does line up and if she's not then wtf
It's more than just the hair
But even then like isn't it said that she only dyed it ONCE and the color just never went away?
Like I feel like its one of those things where she had to activate the trait for it to show up
Like Idk if you've seen Barbie in a (and a?) Mermaid Tale but like
Barbie(her name isn't barbie but i cant remember what it is) doesn't show any mermaid traits at all until shes a certain age then she does things to trigger it(like going in the water and being able to breathe or her hair turning pink.)
Or traits that have been there already now making sense(her being obsessed with the water and surfing)
For Abigail, she just needed to dye her hair that specific color in order for it to stay in that state
And she has other abilities like being able to see the Junimos when literally no one else but the farmer and the wizard can.
And her love of adventure and the unknown
And i think she is a witchy girl along with Emily
Also the fact that Caroline hung out near the wizards tower then got pregnant with Abby
I think she still hangs out there sometimes or maybe its a mod or maybe I'm delusional(this one is a fact)
N e ways i've gone on too long about this
I think she would study for something like archaeology or something or like game development.
Does play video games as much as she can
Does rage quit
Gets angry when she dies
Though its canon that Abby and Seb would end up together if not with the farmer(I think?)
Highkey a toxic gamer but her outbursts are funny so it's allowed
I think she likes games like Undertale, the Sonic games, Mario, hates Valorant with a passion but still plays even though it only makes her angry
I feel like her feelings for him are shallow
Not in a bad way
But in a theres no one else for me to realistically end up with or crush on type thing
Like unless she's going to date one of the girls(I think Pierre is homophobic) Seb is her only choice
I do sorta ship her with Haley tho (goth gf x pink gf)
Does wish to be in the adventurers guilde but i also think she would be terrified
Also realistically I feel like she knows it wouldn't work out for long. Though she does sometimes go in the upper(lower?) levels of the mines.
100 percent prefers her mom to her dad
I think if she ever found out about the wizard possibly being her father it would make her be the most torn she has ever been
Because on one hand she does love pierre hes the man that raised her and I dont think she would accept cheating AT ALL and it would hurt her to know hes not her biological father
But on the other hand she would find it cool that theres a reason for her weirdness
Like theres a reason she can see the weird creatures in the forest when no one else can(to her knowledge)
Theres a reason for her longing to venture out and explore the unknown
And the wizard is pretty freaking cool seeing as she hangs out next to his tower often
Either showers everyday or once every 3 days there's no in between
Probably does want to travel at some point, maybe when she has her own money to spend.
If pierre wanted her to take over his store when he gets too old she would refuse
Is sorta sad she doesn't have any siblings, but at the same is glad because she only has to worry about herself
Learned to play the drums as a way to let out her anger
Has an okay voice when singing, but doesn't know how to properly hit notes without fucking up her voice
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Note
Could you expand on what you said in a post about libraries about the big 5 publishers screwing over libraries in terms of digital lending rights?? I’ve not heard of that at *all* and im generally pretty caught up on publisher news, so I think theres a pretty big library-shaped hole in my sources lol
All righty, a couple disclaimers here. One, this is from a Canadian library perspective, so idk how well it applies to the US. Two, I don't work in the collections department at my library, so I'm basing this off what I remember from class years ago
(also clarifying that I'll be referring to ebooks and audiobooks collectively as digital books just to make it easier)
But in short, the Big Five publishers only very reluctantly put up with libraries having physical books, and one of the reasons they do that is because only one person can have a physical book at a time. Digital books, though? Why, if a library has a copy of one of those, hundreds of people could read it at a time! That's profits they're losing! How terrible!
But, well, selling to libraries is still a sale, so the companies sell to them but restrict it as much as possible. One, libraries pay much more for digital books than your average consumer. I don't have the exact number, but it's significantly higher. Two, unlike a physical book, which a library can have rebound if it's popular but hard to find, and which could conceivably last years if it's hardcover or paperback binding, digital books have severe limits on them. Maybe the library can only buy one "copy" of a digital book - i.e., only one patron can use it at a time. That digital copy artificially expires after 20 loans or 2 years, whichever comes first. Got a waitlist of 50 people waiting to read the latest Alexander McCall Smith book? Too bad! 30 of them are gonna have to go without! Do you have a moderately popular book by Danielle Steel, which gets borrowed every couple of months? Sorry! You've had it for two years, so it's gone now! Better buy a new copy!
Now, this is the case on digital platforms like Libby/Overdrive. Each digital book acts the same as a physical book, except that most of them go away after a certain amount of time. Certain public domain books might be a one-time buy for libraries, but for the most part, every loan, every week that goes by is chipping away at a digital book's life. Certain digital platforms - Hoopla, for example - have what's called "simultaneous use" policies - maybe you only have one ebook copy of a book by Agatha Christie, but every library patron can read it at once. The trade-off for this is that my library has to pay a certain amount for every person currently reading or listening to a book on Hoopla. We have a daily budget that can't be exceeded. Every week we field calls from people who, one afternoon, wanted to open up Hoopla, but were told they couldn't take out any books - because too many of my library's 40 000 active patrons had also decided to enjoy a book that day. And not every publisher even allows simultaneous use licenses, or they don't allow it on all of their titles
A final reminder to this very long post: please do not boycott Libby or Hoopla over this, I beg of you. Your libraries are pouring a lot of money into them because they're being used. Instead, put pressure on the big five publishers to make their digital books accessible, and vote in your municipal elections to get libraries more funding so we have more budget to put into those items. An easy way to increase your library's funding is just to spend a bit of time a week in there. Hang out with your friend for a few hours, just walk in and look at the shelves, or sit there and use their free wifi to play games on your phone. Digital books are here to stay, and libraries are important for getting those books into people's hands
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