#-it didnt make me bawl my eyes out reading it
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mmmm yummy catharsis
#yk ive been thinking for a while that ive just needed a good sob#and GODDAMN if that didnt give it to me. holy hell#was literally crying my eyes out from the moment nimona lost it towards when she sacrificed herself to stop the gun from killing everyone#and also the entire ending after that with the shrine to nimona and everything#with the crying hitting its peak when ballister stopped nimona impaling herself on gloreth's statue and having a cooling period in between#-ballister bringing nimona back to earth and her saving the kingdom#magpie thoughts#nimona#nimona spoilers#<- tagging that for anyone wanting to watch the movie cuz i just spoiled like the whole ending in the tags LMAO#idk if its cuz its been a while but i do NOT remember the comic being this sad. like i remember it was similarly upsetting and evocative but#-it didnt make me bawl my eyes out reading it#good lord jesus i fucking love animation#edit: okay nvm apparently the comic WAS sadder (or sad in a different way ig) i just forgot. well anyways
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Fun fact: Stanley Forbes explicitly stated, “It’s OK, Pip. This was always going to happen. I deserve it.”
Let that sink in. Stanley believed he deserved his death. He thought he was so rotten because of what his father made him do that he thought he earned the right to die early.
Did you realize that Stanley never ever tried to fight off Charlie?
Did you realize that Stanley only tried to resist when Pippa stood in front of him?
Did you realize that Stanley never even tried to fight to survive?
Did you realize that Stanley thought that it was fair that he died?
#IM BACK WITH MY FUN FACTS#did you like it?#fun facts!!#so much fun right?#RIGHT?!#IM BAWLING MY EYES OUT#WHY DO I REREAD KNOWING I LIKE STANLEY AND KNOWING HE DIES???#I just hate myself if I’m doing THIS to myself#HE DIDNT DESERVE THAT#HE DID NOTHING WRONG#rereading ggbb makes me hollow and empty#FUCK.#a good girls guide to murder#good girl bad blood#as good as dead#holly Jackson#maybe if I kill my self the thoughts will go away#brb gonna go sob#weeping and sobbing#Stanley Forbes#people be like#‘what do you like to read??’#trauma. I like to read trauma.
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#unfortunately i dont have anything to show you foday#or anything particular to tell you either#so how about you look at this flower i bought at the local store and i think about what to say along the way#actually the employee at the store gave me a discount#every time i buy flowers im forced to participate in human interactions with strangers and remember that we live in a society#i think now that summer is over and the grass is no longer that green and touchable we should buy flowers from time to time to remain sane#i had to take a break from meds for a few days last week and it went rather ok. except i was bawling my eyes out at every given opportunity#you know. there is actually a game that keeps making me cry even when i cant really physically do it#its not really that sad. i would say that the main genre of this game is actually comedy. but the topics raised in dialogues wreck my brain#i dont really feel anything at all while reading the text or anything like that. i dont ecen think about it that much#but every now and then i feel the wetness on my hands and realize i've been crying for a while because of what read there#thats how i cry 99% of the time since the day i was born and i didnt really think anything about it untill now#my psychiatrist told me i have severe problems with dissociation and recognising my own emotions#but a few days ago i was watching some silly local soap opera in the background (im binging this stuff its iconic) & it broke my brain#the raised topics in the series triggered me this much i felt The Pain™. idk how to describe it rather then The Pain™ lol#now im back on meds and i dont feel anything at all again. this or my ability to recognise my own emotions just went down to 5% again#sometime i dream of someone who would posses my brain for a few minutes so that they would help me understand what i really feel#or if my reactions to life events are correct. sometimes when i think that i know exactly what i feel i stop myself and recognise#that i dont know nor understand shit#the more i think about it the more materialistic i become#you can always measure something physical. you can touch it or even search every inch of it with a magnifying glass all you want#but you cant measure the feeling#you know its really bizzare that i feel so much attraction towards poetry while having so much trouble with the concept of emotions itself#you can call me pragmatic but im too lenient for that. you can call me lenient but im too pragmatic for that. idk man. im gonna sleep now
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sam i didnt even watch fhjy but can you tell me more of ur thoughts abt kipperlilly? any thoughts even stream of consciousness, she seems so teenager rage gone wrong im so fascinated by her
HJBFESJBFEKSFS THIS IS SO FUNNY OFC ok this is going to be a range of thoughts about the reactions i've seen from both ends of the rat grinder Discourse™
i think it's fine to be like, yeah, what kipperlilly's anger stems from is like deeply unsympathetic and comes from a very privileged status. i think being like "no that's normal for a teen girl" is silly. she is very much not normal she's a little upper-middle class brat and i love her. i love that she's so deeply distasteful and unappealing to people LOL. hate when female characters have to be smoothed down to be liked! like we don't have to downplay her negative traits when people are obsessed with male serial killers all the time etc etc
BUT i also think people forget that like... the bad kids were reading private thoughts she shared with her therapist (which is a massive invasion of privacy)! like of course it was fucked up. that's why she was going to a therapist lmao!!! it stresses me out that people are this vitriolic about a teen character who is pretty explicitly mentally ill and trying to get better about it but is being manipulated by a deity of rage and possibly her adult vice principal like. you don't have to LIKE her but calling for her to be violently murdered is wild to me. the bad kids had never even HEARD of her before this season and you can metagame about brennan not having invented her character yet all you want but in canon u gotta assume she was successfully keeping that rage down until she got got and is now being actively corrupted by a powerful rage deity lmaoooo
and like! she got her narrative punishment!! the monkey's paw curled and she lost her best friend she's got her traumatic backstory now!!! she's already suffering and at her lowest i don't need her to die (again!)
i think brennan is past the point of making teen characters irredeemable so i can only hope that the cast follows through on that bc i feel like redemption and healing from trauma is one of the strongest themes in fantasy high like i bawled my eyes out in every aelwyn and adaine scene. which is why it's really funny to me that siobhan is kipperlilly's biggest hater because i feel like she's a great mirror to adaine's spite and aelwyn's redemption..... like siobhan's characters are all very appealing to me because of their rage. god im hoping and praying they don't kill the rat grinders in the finale god bless
oh final petty thing i think saying kipperlilly's name wrong was only funny the first 200 times <3 love u all mwa
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Not in my eyes
Self indulgent writing, not proofread, made this in 30 minutes, Im tired.
Wanderer x fem reader, comfort, fluff, called wanderer Kuni, not proofreads, soft wanderer
♡♡♡♡
Its late, the moon is shining brightly
You were standing in front of your house, frozen and looking at the doorknob
You took a deep breath and unlocked the door, you knew Wanderer would be home and with how youre feeling at the moment, you really didnt wanna worry him.
"Kuni! Im home!" You said, taking off your shoes and placing your duffle bag on the floor and walking to the living room, smiling a bit when you saw him sitting on the couch reading a book.
"Hey you" he replied half heartedly, focused on his book. "How was it?" He continued, finally facing you with his signature resting bitch face, only... softer.
You froze in place for a while, before quickly responding "It was great, just tiring. You know, the usual" you nodded,
"Reading a book Kuni? How amusing!" You peeked from beside his face, resting your hands on the head of the sofa. You liked teasing him, and truly, you wanted to shift the conversation away from how youre doing.
"Lesser lord Kusanali kept on bugging me to try and read a book. To make her stop babbling on about everytime we meet, I'll do it just this once." He scoffed before fixing his eyes on the book he was reading. "At least she got me a mildly interesting book."
You giggled softly and read one of the pages to get a drift of the plot, smiling softly
Wanderer glanced at you, and noticed how your smile didnt reach your eyes. One usually wouldnt be able to tell the differences, as youre always smiling. But he can. He always knows.
"Youre not okay." He stated, finally facing you, his brows furrowed.
Your eyes widen and looked at him.
"What do you mean?" Scoffing, as if you were offended. But you werent, you were scared he saw right through you
And he did.
"Youre acting weird. Whats wrong? What happened?"
"Kuni its nothing seriously. Im just tired, you know what? Im gonna go take a shower I stink anyway-" you frowned and started to walk away, avoiding the convo from escalating.
"(Name)" he said sternly making you stop walking, your back facing him
Silence ensued before you took a deep breath and looked at him, smiling. That damn fake smile always making him unsettled and worried for you "Im fine love. I'm going to take a shower. It was a long day training today."
He was about to retaliate but you beat him to it by walking to the bathroom.
He was gonna ask you later. Wanderer promised himself.
By the time you finished showering wanderer was already in the bedroom waiting for you.
You knew if you walked out he'd come complaining. Sighing in defeat, you walked to your shared bed and went to lay down.
Befire you could, wanderer held your shoulder gently to stop you.
He hesitated to start talking but got the courage after a while.
"(Name)... please tell me whats wrong. I want to help you.. please..?" He started, being gentle as possible as to not make you scared or alarmed.
You stared at him and teard swelled up in your eyes.
You cant hide it no longer.
As soon as he saw tears in your eyes, he pulled you in for a hug and sat in silence.
Whether or not you wanted to talk it was your choice and whichever choice you decided to take he will support it no matter what.
"I... its just... im.." you started, pausing after every word. Mainly because if you started pouring out on how you feel you'd start bawling your eyes out and on the other hand it's because you don't know how to express your own emotions as you've been suppressing it for all these years it's hard to be able to figure out how you truly feel.
"I felt uh.. like.. uhm.. useless? Weak? I dunno. Im just." Another pause
"Coach asked me "oh youre not back yet are you?"
I was confused because I was there. Then I realised.. he was talking about old me. The me who was trying to do her best when sparring. The kne who was burnt out but not on the verge if breaking...."
"It just got me thinking i suppose. Im not good at what I do. And either way... I hate what I do. But I cant quit." You chuckled, although it wasnt a genuine one, more like a tired and defeated one.
Want to listen to every single word you said before kissing your forehead gently and reply to what you said in a hushed manner. "Dont listen to them. He shouldnt have said a thing. If I could punt him I would, but it's late now" (and I wouldnt get the joy of beating him up if hes asleeo and unable to scream fir help) he didnt add that last part as that could have made you feel worse.
"Its hard.... and Im still useless.. and weak. I cant seem to be able to gain back my strength at all" you said as you closed your eyes and laid your head in his chest.
Wanderer wasn't the best with comforting people but for you he would try if he had to go fight Celestia themselves to be able to make you smile once again then he would he would go above and beyond to see you smile and be happy forever. But for now he knew that simple words of reassurance would help
"Youre not weak and youre not useless
Not in my eyes."
♡♡♡♡
#genshin fanfic#fanfic#genshin fluff#genshin impact#genshin imagines#x reader#genshin x reader#kunikuzushi x reader#wanderer x y/n#wanderer x you#wanderer fluff#wanderer x reader#genshin wanderer#scaramouche x you#scaramouche x reader
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If you don't mind me asking but when did you first get into re:zero
yeah i dont mind at all :o ig yallre gonna hear my full origin story now haah. its my—my… ok id say tragic backstory but i dont think this is really that tragic LMAO. my humorous backstory? silly backstory?
anyway i got into rezero in summer of 2020!! this was months before s2 started airing and by around this time there was just s1, s1 directors cut may or may not have been out?? i forgor :<, but then s2’s first teaser came out right about now.
it was quarantine…. i was bored one day and wanted smth new to watch… and by then id only really briefly seen rezero—like you know that s1 promo poster with subaru standing there while surrounded by some of the main girls in s1 (beatrice felt emilia rem ram)?? yeah id seen that. in the back of my mind i kinda assumed the show was just another one of those abt a dude surrounded by his harem of girls or smth?? :< but then i learned the Real Premise is the time travel. via death!!!! and ive always loveddd angst and whump so i was like “NO FUCKING WAY I HIT THE JACKPOT” and eagerly looked into rezero some more to see if it was worth watching. and then i saw all the shit reviews on rz that never seemed to agree on if it was good or not…… and then gigguk’s video…… and then i saw mother’s basement on youtube make a defense of rezero s1 and i was like!!! ok fuck it im watching this show. i want the angst i want the complex time travel shit. i think id spoiled myself on a couple of subarus deaths by this point trying to decide if i should commit to rezero and then i started binge watching s1!! esp when i was like ok this is a good time to get into it s2 was announced right??
anyway i got hooked on rezero fr 👍👍 the first s1 emisuba lap pillow had me quaking in my boots ;-;;; and i was already invested from ep1 bc i liked the characters a lot already!!! i am simply BUILT DIFFERENT i loved subaru from day one!!! by the royal selection episodes ofc i was dying of secondhand embarrassment but tbh i grew even more invested in rezero after that!! i was and still am super impressed that the narrative had the balls to have subaru fuck up sooo so so bad there. like seeing that emisuba argument and the julisuba duel for the first time was crazyyy. the conflict was really good and the latter s1 development…. woagh.
and then you know i finish s1 and i immediately get to researching how to read, i read arc 4’s wn and bawl my eyes out from the sheer amount of rollercoaster both the emotions and Long Ass Novel gave me (yes i was bawling my eyes out at parent and child) (yes i was bawling my eyes out at choose me) (yes i was bawling my eyes out for all the suffering loops) (yes i was bawling) (i have no clue how i read all those pages fr like that arc is massive), i speedrun arc 5, i accidentally spoil certain bits for myself (arc 6 stuff), i read most of arc 6 in spurts, tune in every week for s2 (and bawled my eyes out seeing the s2 part 1 op for the first time) etc etc!! one thing lead to another and now i am here…….. three yrs in this fandom… nearly (?) a yr being active on rezero tumblr… HAH
also i made a reddit account back inn…. 2020 or 2021 bc i wanted to be a tinyyy bit active in rezero reddit (this was half a mistake btw. i think i have more balls of steel now but my younger self was sooooo naive. shaking them by the shoulders. this is an anime fandom!!!!!! and this is reddit!!! whatre u expecting???? i am less shy now on the internet thats for sure!!). anyway im still a tiny bit active on rz reddit now after not touching it for like a year. now i use my reddit account for spreading otto propaganda and slander /lh …../hj
but anyway ive never been active in fandoms until rezero and thats bc id usually lurk and a lot of my past hyperfixation medias were :< big fandoms :<<< but then. ok im a fanfic enjoyer and i didnt write much fanfic or publish fic at all before this fandom but then in 2020 after watching s1 i checked rezero’s ao3 page and *sniffles* *sobs* thERE WAS ONLY LIKE 2 PAGES ON THERE MAN….. A WHOLE DESERT…. yes and then one thing lead to another and now there is more fic and also ig id be considered an english fic writer elder maybe…… i started posting in like fall/winter 2020? and maaaan im one of the only ppl from that era whos still posting i think!!! ive seen the entire english fanfic scene pop up!! ive participated in a bunch of community events… sooo wild to think about. i feel old guys!!!
but now i have gotten more and more active in the rz fandom yes :3 its been fun!! rezero is very important media to me and ive met lots of cool people in my time here :) when october 2024 rolls around itll be s3 time (AAAAA HYPE HYPE HYPE) and like four yrs of me being in this fandom?? its wild but my lifes genuinely changed a lot bc of me getting into rezero!! met lots of cool people… made pals… gotten my writing and art out there and improved on it via. large amounts of rezero fanart HAH.. became more unhinged.. etc etc :D even got to meet one of my buddies i met via rezero irl 👍👍 more irl crossover events will happen i swear.
also gigguk in my eyes redeemed himself for his old rezero skit vid by making a glowing review for rezero s2 with his pals. i can forgive him i suppose :<<<
in conclusion: idk if i count as a fandom elder but i sure have a lot of my own fandom lore pfft :<<<
#ask#suffaru post#people including english professors have told me theyre impressed with my writing but truth is ive just been writing a shit ton of anime#fanfic for the last three or so years LMFAO
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(swiftie asker) THE WAY I FUCKING BAWLED THROUGH THE ENTIRE FUCKING. POST YOU RESPONDED TO MY ASK IN???? BAXTER YOU ARE SO AUGUSTINE CODED GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HEAD
something that always scratches my brain when i remember it is that if we're aligning olba characters with the actual lyrics... to mc it was "just a summer thing", but to baxter it was "summer love" AND THAT THOUGHT FUCKING KILLS ME EVERY SINGLE TIME BECAUSE . "YOU WEREN'T MINE TO LOSE" OHHHH I AM SO FUCKING SICK
not to mention cove being betty oh my fucking days don't even get me started. "i knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired" I AM ABOUT TO CRY!! DON'T EVEN START WITH ME!!! i don't fucking play abt the folklore love triangle ESPECIALLY WHEN IT RELATES TO COVE BAXTER AND MC.
yes yes yes!! those lyrics are perfect for this scenario!!! i didnt have time to sit n pick out some from the songs but you read my mind. those are perfect.
honestly, the way i see baxter n MC's fling in canon, i totally think it was more for baxter. he knew it was supposed to be temporary, a summer fling. he knew that. he said that. but he couldn't possibly help falling for you, who could.
you're too sweet, too gorgeous, too kind. he knows this could turn into so much more if he let it but if he did he'd stain you. a white cloth turning brown. mud on a beautiful canvas.
and when you end up with cove, i know it hurt baxter. the way he reacts in the wedding dlc, the way he talked about cove being the perfect husband, partner, friend, son. and that he was just something temporary. fleeting.
"summer love" and "you weren't mine to lose" is so perfect even for canon. he sees how hardworking and sweet cove is, knows he's perfect for you. that cove is the best man anyone could ask for. he can see that. he knows that is truer than anything else.
he knows it was just a summer fling, that's why he tells you not to mind him, and that's why he's confused you'd wanna be friends with him at the end of your wedding.
and he knows he has no business being sad and jealous watching you plan your wedding. he was never a part of the big picture of your life. he was the sweet lemonade you wanted for a summer but cove was the water you need. so he can't be mad that you are making a life with him.
after all, it wasn't supposed to be deep enough for him to lose something. to lose you. so when you drive away with cove, all your wedding plans in place. he can't cry. he has no reason, no right. you weren't his to lose.
also i can so see this with derek too... because derek has a crush on MC, and i know some of us didn't give derek a 2nd glance the first time around. (me. it was me...)
but he sees you falling in love with cove, he sees your relationship with cove growing and growing. you never look at him like that. you never smile or laugh at him like that. you don't linger when you hug him like you do cove, trying to milk every second.
and you won't kiss him like you kiss cove, and you won't say goodbye on the phone the way you do to cove, with a sweet, whispered depart, full of love and every word you say is drenched in it.
and when you start going out, he can't be mad. he never tried. he tried to wait, wanted to prove himself as someone suitable to be by your side.
so how can he be upset that you start dating another man when he never made his move, never asked you to wait for him. never asked you to look at him like you do at cove.
he never fought for his spot in your heart.
he knows you love him, but not the way you love cove. that's different. very different. so different that it clogs up his throat and clouds his eyes and clenches his heart in a vice when he sees you so in love with each other.
he loves you both too much to cry over what he 'lost.' because you were never his to lose.
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ok i just watched two movies on stan. the first one was close(2023), which i was not expecting to have such a tragic ending. i was bawling.
the second one was my first summer(2020) absolutely beautiful, i loved it. australian, queer and sapphic isnt a combination i see a lot in media and im all three so yay. also quick question, when do you guys think it was set?
edit: the reason im asking is cos the cop said shed be like an adult when she was 17. i saw his license plate and it was a victorian license plate so i was like oh maybe its different there but i looked it up and youve definitely gotta be 18. so i think its set in the past and maybe the law's changed since. it felt pretty modern but also even grace didnt have a phone and she talked about reading the newspaper which people dont usually do anymore.
ALSO do you guys have any suggestions for sapphic tv shows(that wont make me bawl my eyes out) cos all the ones ive found either have a sapphic side character and the main characters are all straight or the main characters are sapphic but theyre like 40. nothing wrong with that i just prefer like teen and coming of age shows ig. PLS HELP
#close#my first summer#sapphic#lesbian#bisexual#pansexual#omnisexual#shows#tv shows#movies#PLS I NEED GOOD SHOW RECS
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im actually not joking, when i read ahb i literally somehow. didnt notice the mcd tag. copenhagen destroyed my very soul.
and then, of course, i did as anyone else would do, and recommended it to someone who i used to be friends with, and felt really stupid when he immediately noticed the mcd after like 2 chapters and blew up my messages panicking. i still got him to finish the fic, i still have the snaps he sent me of him swearing at me while sobbing his eyes out
NOOOOO
I started reading it when it was on chapter 4 and seemed to tune it out until I saw someone mention it over 20 chapters in and went 'shit, too late to turn back now'
I made my non-marauders friend read it and they were convinced the MCD was someone else so they allowed themselves to get attached to who it really was
Then I got videos of them bawling 😭 tbf I also cry every time I read the grief chapters because it feels so authentic I can't do it
Why do Jegulus fics always have the best depictions of grief and growth and why do they always make me cry like this
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hello hello sav <3 how are you doing?
im attempting a yap ask but i dont know how much time i have on my hands so if i need to go i'll just press send and you'll have an awkward cutoff. also, it will probably be mildly ominous lolol
anyways !
i got my period for the first time since like ,, july ? i think ? which is insane the stress has been crazy
also like.. wdym september is almost over WDYM. october, november, december then ??? new year ????? ur birthday ?????????
speaking of which i've been brainstorming ideas for an (online, not money costing) present and it's like. "write something. okay, what. okay, got it. wait no that's cringe nvm." even though it's probably not cringe 😒😒
a pinterest board sounds sillyfunny hmm
okay next topic pretend you didn't read the last part because i am HORRIBLE at hiding surprises like it just makes me so happy when other people are happy and like arghhh #girlproblems
i dreamt up a new smau yesterday and ill dm u about it tmr <- hasn't finished the first one yet, hasnt even STARTED it
OH OH OH I MISS YOU SM theres nothing more to that bit i kept thinking i have to add it in somewhere and also kept forgetting but like yes. um. imy baby ily 🫶
anyways SCHOOL right. today i caught my super awesome studious top grades role model student bunking class with the school's head girl. that was crazy. and i was going to bunk english (bc the teacher SUX see next para.) but i was so surprised at seeing her sneak off school bag n all during break that i accidentally bumped into said english teacher and she smiled and said hru LIKEEE KMS NO.
i spent a good 15 minutes hiding in the bathroom from her tho. okay so lemme describe our uniforms for u. so first we have like an erm. top thingy. google "female kurta" and you'll see like this thing w/ slits at the sides etc etc. it's usually shorter than the ones shown bc. uniform. and then we also have like loose fitting pants, and uhh. imagine a doctor's white coat thingy over all that which buttons up. and then a headscarf. ANYWAYS THIS IS RELEVANT BC. theres a girl in our class, the youngest & she's 15 in october. BUT wtv uh her apron (coat thingy is called that) buttons are loose and they keep opening. so obviously the teacher had to help.
"boys rn think many things they will stare at u and then in the future u will not get married" — mrs j 2024 😻 LIKE GIRL WHAT. and then she fatshamed a girl WHO ISN'T EVEN FAT BTW SHE'S LIKE. HEALTHY. AND HEALTHIER THAN MOST OF US SHE'S PHYSICALLY ACTIVE WORKS OUT AND EATS FRUITS AND STUFF um oops gtg i think.. and oh also she like ,, has hormone stuff but wtf woman. u dont even know proper english anyways gtg TELL ME AB UR HOMECOMING (?) and school is so stressful rn dont get stressed ily sav! <3
um so im gonna bawl my eyes out i was in the middle of typing out my reply AND IT DELETED ITSELF!! this is a cruel, cruel joke! ANYWAY HI LINA!! im doing good, hope you're doing well!!!!! <3
I MISSED YOUR YAP ASKS SM so happy to be receiving this 🙂↕️ have an amazing day at school!!
SINCE JULY??? i hate my period but i think i would lose it if i didnt have my period for a month cause i would convince myself i have conceived jesus in my uterus and am going to be a teen mother... SO ITS GOOD YOU GOT IT BUT I HOPE YOU FEEL BETTER PERIODS SUCK SO BAD 💔
god it's so weird that september is ending... SPEAKING OF WHICH I HAVE AN ARTICLE DUE TO MY MAGAZINE ON OCT 1 I FORGOT today im locking in so hard on my school work and job... im also starting babysitting the side hustles are going crazy rn...but the thing is time is passing so funkily?? idk but it feels so slow during the day but before yk it you've been in the cycle for a rly long time and its the end of the month!!! i rmbr asking my friends this week if it still felt like it was the beginning of the month for them and they were like "no...?" LIKE OKAY THEN just slap me in the face and call me a freak at that point goodness 😞 but timeline 4 me we have october + halloween, november + thanksgiving, december + christmas, january + new year + BDAY!!!!, february + valentines day, THEN march + your bday <333
im gonna act like i didnt see that one! im 45% blind in my right eye and fully blind in my left... matter of fact i cant see much of nothing 🫡
NEW SMAU WEEEEEEE im so excited to hear about it!!!!! ga(c)r is heavily staring at u from the corner of the room BUT SHE CAN WAIT
BRO I MISS YOU SO BADDD ilysm imysm chronically online era come back to us this summer PLEASE
YES SCHOOL‼️ HELLO NOT THE ACADEMIC WEAPON I WOULD BE SO RATTLED IF I WITNESSED THAT? your teacher freaks me out i think id cry if i bumped into them LIKE I WOULD GENUINELY TWEAK!! especially the smile i can only imagine it looking creepy tbh
15 minutes in the bathroom u are so valid lina 😞 ALSO FEMALE KURTAS ARE SO CUTE THEY LOOK SO COMFY?? YOUR WHOLE UNIFORM SOUNDS SO COMFORTABLE 💔 i remember when i went to priv school i had to wear fitted polos and skorts CAUSE THEY WOULDNT LET GIRLS WEAR PANTS UNLESS IT WAS WINTER THAT WAS RIDICULOUS anyway back on topic that girl is pretty young for your class 🧍♀️ what r the age cutoffs like there?? cause usually the youngest ppl in my grade are both late august/early september idk
"boys rn think many things they will stare at u and then in the future u will not get married" GIRLL SHUT UP 😭 whos gonna tell her! FATSHAMED??? there is no way.... THATS ACTUALLY INSANE I BET THAT GIRL IS MORE ACTIVE THAN HER SHE NEEDS TO SHUT UP ⁉️ just messed up to do that in general like keep it to yourself ffs 😞 "u dont even know proper english" CLOCKED HER SO HARD i fear u are correct
ILL TELL YOU ABOUT HOMECOMING NOW ILL GIVE U THE RUNDOWN OF EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED 🗣️
so like around 2:30 a bunch of my friends met up at one girl's house and we all got dressed and did makeup together!! my friend kaila did my makeup and i also did my friend jaslene's makeup THEN i had to book it and get to a hair appointment i had at a salon to get my hair done for the dance 💔
after i finished getting my hair done i met with my friends at a restaurant and we all had dinner!! we took some photos outside while we were there and while we were taking photos my foot WAS DEMOLISHED by jaslene's boot heel thing anyway my foot was stepped on and it hurt cause i had open toe heels it was so bad hhhh BUT IM FINE NOW I THINK ‼️‼️
after dinner we all drove to the dance in one car and we were vibing out to baby + hot to go during the drive I COOKED UP THE RAP IN BABY SO HARD im famous amongst my friend group for the rap i always get the mic for that part 🫡
when we got to the dance it was 7:00 and we just had a bunch of fun until 10:00 😭 hugged literally everyone that i knew i love seeing people at dances cause they always look so gorgeous!!!! lots of jumping around in the crowd and scream-shouting lyrics to songs that played... tons of fun 🙂↕️ my voice is practically gone now and my feet hurt since i was jumping around in heels the entire night BUT WE ARE SO CHILL it was really enjoyable!!
i agree school is super stressful rn... ill try not to!! you too <3 take care + have an amazing day at school!! ily lina <3 xx
#asks!!#alina ily alina#my platonic soulmate literally written in the stars honeypie loml sugarplum!!
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I LOVE these little ask game things so heres some for u!!
orchid - whats a song you consider to be perfect?
abelia - do you have a particular piece of jewelry you always wear or can’t part with?
camelia - what were you like when you were younger? do you think you’ve changed a lot?
jasmine - do you have a movie or book you loved but will never watch/read again?
ivy - what are your ‘tells’ for your emotions and moods? how can someone tell you’re happy, annoyed, upset or tired?
chamomile - what kind of things do you like receiving as gifts?
aloe vera - whats something (mundane) you want to experience in life?
okay ill stop now😭😭LMAO
orchid - whats a song you consider to be perfect?
hug by seventeen!! - so i actually had a hard time w/ this bc im someone who LOVESSSS music but as soon as i saw this in my liked songs i was like 'this is the one' LMASODAD. so a short (KINDA LONG ACTUALLY) explanation as to why this is a banger: as the title suggests, this song is a hug to its listeners. my favourite lyrics are definitely, 'whenever you're having a hard time, you can get a hug from me, im the same' and 'don't say sorry, don't worry, don't be scared, don't cry now. to be you're very precious' NEUYHUSDHD when i first heard this song, i didnt understand it because of the language but i felt a tug in my heart and researched abt it some more bc i was like 'WTF WHY IS THIS SONG MAKING ME FEEL LIKE THIS ASHDUAHD' . so when i found out its meaning, i immediately bawled bc those days were the hardest of my life (re-yal not fa-keh) so yeah >:D
abelia - do you have a particular piece of jewelry you always wear or can’t part with?
earrings! i dont really have a specific pair of earrings that i cant let go of/not wear bc i change them from time to time HUSADUAHD but ofc every pair is dear to me as theyre either gifts from relatives or my mom >:D
camelia - what were you like when you were younger? do you think you’ve changed a lot?
i was definitely someone who expressed herself with emotions. i wasn't afraid to laughed boisterously when i was happy, cry when sad, and raise my voice when i was angry, but i guess that part of me kinda diminished (DIMINISHED??? HUAHSDUHADS) when i grew up?#@$# ofc, im still very young, but even so i'd like to say to an extent, i've changed (emotion-wise, at least) >:D luckily, im still someone who's retained her child-like habits and im very happy about that neyhehehe
jasmine - do you have a movie or book you loved but will never watch/read again?
I LOVEEEEEEE PACIFIC RIM SM WAUHDSUAHDS unfortunately i have no plans on re-watching it (again bc ive re-watched it like 3 times already but like yeah UAHDSUHADS) bc the movie's kinda boring now@#*@ so i js stick to thinking about other concepts i can connect to it bc im delulu LMAODSMAOSD
ivy - what are your ‘tells’ for your emotions and moods? how can someone tell you’re happy, annoyed, upset or tired?
okay so i had to ask my friends for this q bc i actually dont know LMSADOSAOD SO HERE: happy - when i giggle/cackle/laugh and yap a lot irritated/annoyed/upset/angry - whenever my voice goes stern and i become direct and whenever i get really passionate about that topic (or person LMASDAO). basically when i yap with reason tired: - when i become silent and just listen instead of yap bonus: dejected (my favourite big boy word) - whenever they see tears in my eyes or when i become less energetic. they can also tell when i brush it off like its nothing/make a joke out of it LMDOASDO
chamomile - what kind of things do you like receiving as gifts?
cash. HUDHUDSA IM JKING (not really) BUT LIKEEE i guess that or food HAUDSHAUHDS ok im not going to sugarcoat it anymore: i LOVE receiving gifts. you can hate me for this but like im someone who prefers receiving than giving @#?@*( OK IM SORRY BUT 😭😭😭 its not like im greedy or whatnot, i js have a hard time thinking of gifts?@#@*#( so when i give something its either cash ASDHUASHD OR LIKE I ASK FOR A WISHLIST LMDSOADSM ofc i love giving esp when theyre happy HAUDHAD i just prefer receiving (@#( (also yupp giving/receiving cash in filipino culture [or for our family at least] is a pretty normal thing HAUDUASHD)
aloe vera - whats something (mundane) you want to experience in life?
a weekday with my mom :D - since the both of us have school and work, we dont usually get to hang out during weekdays so its kinda D: and when she comes home at night im either already asleep or tired and is de-stressing with games so i dont really pay attention to my surroundings AAAAAA and since my mom is technically the only immediate family member i have HAUSDHUSHD (father's story is too personal to tell LMADOAMOD and im an only child so HAUDSUAH) and shes quite old as well so i get sad when our only actual hang out days are weekends. but whenever our country's holidays are on weekdays i make sure to spend the day w her instead of playing AUDSHUHSD
THANK YOU FOR THIS MWAMWAWMM
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I have never loved anything more than your clay pompomlumbo. would you ever consider sharing details on how you made him? no worries if not at all of course, and either way thank you for putting such a darling creation into the world and sharing it with us!
aaaaw thank uouuu i get so happy when yall love him so much. i love him dearly (*^_^*) !!!!
and of course ill share more details ! putting the rest under a read more
i used a air dry clay called Mont Marter.
hiii okay!
• for the shape I rolled two oval-ish circles, one small for the head and a big one for the body. as seen the pics
• For the smaller parts like his paws, feet, ears, and hat is similar just try to get a as close as possible to the shape.
• it might benefit more if you have a pompompurin figure on hand to look at as areference model. i say only because i had saved photos online of pompompurin that had a full turn around, he didnt came out on model of course but nonetheless he is still cute. also if you see the progess pic ive uploaded, his body changes through out bc i went on layering clothes and that altered the figure ≡(▔﹏▔)≡ . And the feet couldn’t support the upper part which made him slant at the end result. • plus i think I should’ve let it dry a bit to attach the clothes. *so, when i sculpt the second one I'll try and let it dry a bit before adding on clothes.
• for the clothes, Any smooth cylinder item you have is good enough to roll flat. the raincoat was a tad bit difficult i must say because of just me eye bawling everything, the size and trimming it. Cutting the shapes. attaching them easy, the hatching and wetting the area a bit then place shape to then smooth out the seam
• once you are satisfied with the end results let it air dry like two days. On mine sculpt I let dry for three days bc of the amount of clay the little guy had in him. with this clay you'll know when it dries completely.
• then comes sanding! To remove the bumps and random dust that has attached to the figure. I used a fine sanding paper that’s for cars because I thought I didn’t have any. That’s how he ended up looking all smooth like that lol. Then I realized I did have sanding paper, the sanding sheets that come with the blending stumps. I used that as well. i did that for a good week till i figured i couldnt get the creases and indents it had. sand till your satisfied but don't sand too hard or fast! oh yeah, IMPORTANT that you sand the feet and make sure the figure can stand on its own!
• After that You are ready to paint! paints I used are those 98¢ paint bottles Apple Barrel you can get at walmart and other craft art stores.
~ before paiting i was debating whether to paint pants or not so I did neither and went in carved pants on him.
i didnt even used up all the clay as i thought i would. theres like half of it left and i bought the rust color one for the next pompomlumbo i wanna do. this time i learned from my mistakes plus i now have a little pompom to actually have as a ref
#hope this is insightful !#oh also if theres anymore youll still like to know. my ask or dm are always open!#ask
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(im really stupid but i hope u like this fanletter 😭)
hello <3 this is for my favourite writer on tumblr; to the the same writer who does not realise how much their works could mean to someone, the lovely @rrxnjun 🎀 !!!
so, i found your blog at the beginning ot this month– november, 2023, and now that the month's about to end, i have nearly finished reading all your nct works.
to me, this month is the most special one of this year. why? because i found your blog, your stories– some pieces of your mind. i found you through one of those nct fanfic recs, 'take the stairs - njm' being the first work i read from you. it was sweet, it made me happy. and then i read the other two parts of the 'simplify romance' series, which will always hold a special place in my heart.
this year has been the worst for me, with no one for me to lean on to, weird identify crisis shit, and losing myself in this tiring process of growing up. but you know what? you saved 2023 for me. when no one's words could speak to me, yours did. you make me feel a little less lonely.
im a silly teenager, who never read sad/mainly angsty stories before i found you because i was scared, i was confident i'd cry. and i did. i gathered the courage to read angst only because you'd written it, and it was so worth it. ive stayed up so many nights this month just to read your works in peace and privacy, hidden from my family, and then spend the days thinking about how you literally create art, and telling my bestfriends about it. you are blessed. you are phenomenal. no amount of thank yous or i love yous could be enough for me to express my gratitude. you've made me feel so at peace with my thoughts sometimes and you've made me feel like i'm not alone. you have magic in your hands. i owe you so much, i wish i could gift you something, but sadly im still a minor and theres a few years until i finish uni and then get a job, and then i promise i'll get you something, because i am so lucky to be able to read your stories for free. you deserve so much more than followers, likes and reblogs. each one of your fics have made me tear up and all of them are too special for me.
this month ive read all of your nct dream '00 line fics, and my favourite was 'happier than ever' which i finished a week ago— AND I SWEAR THAT FIC DESTROYED ME 😭😭😭 it had me bawling my eyes out for two hours on a school night i love it so so fucking much, i literally think about it daily and i told all my friends about it and im so in love with it, please tell me, for my inner peace that renjun and the reader ended up getting together and being fine because im gonna cry over it for the rest of my life IDC IF THEY DIDNT END UP TOGETHER please lie to me and tell me they did 💔💔💔💔💔😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
i want you to know, and to remember this whenever you feel even a little like giving up— you have magic, bar, don't ever let go of that magic.
your stories make me want to heal and to help everyone heal. to be loved and to love everyone. to be cared for and care for everyone. your magic helps me survive my days with a little smile. thank you so much for everything you've done for me, without realising you're helping me live.
every single word i wrote here– i swear on everything i have, i genuinely mean it. you are the best thing that happened this year :) i hope that one day someone will love you as much as i love your blog.
(me when i talk about your work)
P.S. permission to take a screenshot of your blog and paste it to my scrapbook by which i can remember my teenage years that your stories mended, please?
thank you for reading, ily ❤️
- your biggest fan (hopefully no one's more dedicated!!) 💘
when i saw this in my inbox i got so emotional i couldnt reply immidiately because i genuinely wanted to sob. this is so so sweet and it mustve taken a long time to type out and i appreciate you a WHOLE lot, not only for this, but also for supporting me sm over the last month. :,)
take the stairs is a very sweet and fun fic and i am glad you found my blog through this one, haha. the simplify romance series holds my favorite fics and i PROMISE to finish jeno's entry at the beginning of the next year!! it HAS to be done. it means a lot to me that you took the time of your day to read my works and that you enjoyed them so much to let me know.
i am happy to hear that my work could help you through some hard times. as a reader on this platform as well, i do know that feeling very well and i could never imagine being that person to someone, but i am glad my words could be there for you when no one else could. hearing this makes all the effort feel worth it, and it's something i'll think of whenever im having a hard time with my work again. i also hope life is nicer to you in the future, and if you ever need someone, my inbox is always open.
having my fics be called art is something i never imagined could happen. it's beyond what i think about my work, but i am honored to hear this compliment, truly. despite being a writer i cant find the words to express my gratitude towards you and your supportive words right now >:( it does mean the whole entire world to me. please do NOT worry about "paying me back" or something, i do this because it's what i love doing and sharing my work with others makes me happy, so an ask like this is more than enough for me. you made me feel really appreciated and i will remember and treasure your kind words forever.
happier than ever is definitely a heavier read, since it's partly from personal experience, hh. i tend to project on renjun a lot so take this as a warning for my other renjun fics LMAO. TT this fic has a special place in my heart and hearing you talk so highly about it makes me all warm on the inside hhhhh my love langugage is words of affirmation stop this or ill cry. i enjoy leaving my fics open-ended to interpretation of the reader, so whatever you feels fits their story is how the story ends for you. <3
i will definitely use this ask as a reminder to not give up when i feel like doing so. it really brought me a lot of strength :) thank you for calling my writing magic. i never imagined someone describing it that way, but it does feel good to hear haha
knowing that my work helped somebody and made them heal and feel all sorts of emotions inside makes me feel at peace. thank you so much. SO much.
also u really make me want to bawl with that scrapbook comment. cant believe im an important part of someone's teenage years :((
once again, words cant express how much this means to me. thank you and i hope my fics continue to be a source of good things for you :) i will think of this often. ily
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Tldr: i like your tales from the stinky dragon post
I read your tftsd carina lives/kydron post, and honestly thats an amazing idea.
So all the universe crashing stuff aside, so carina becomes an infinight intern instead, but first she needs to get to that point. The first question is, would she also become an archer/fighter, or would she do something else? While there is the possibility that shed try and do magic, or maybe take after their father instead, i do think shed also want to honor their mother, so maybe shed just be a ranger instead?
Shed also wouldnt get the borgian arm, cause well, she didnt loose hers, but unlike Kyborg she got caught in the full blast of the explosion, since Kristellena only was able to shield Ky. So she probably got fucked up at least a little bit physically. My ideas are, she either lost one of her eye like Quadron, or one of her legs got fucked so she had to amputee it later on.
And one last thing for a little bit later in the actual campaign, Quadron finds out shs alive, and as a huge fuck you instead of sending some random squadron to kill her he sends kydron. And cariana, not expecting anything, is suddenly face to face with someone she thought was long dead, but its wrong, wrong in a way that makes her dizzy and crushes her lungs.
Now, for the universe crashing, imagine og kyborg and carina meeting and idk, they just get to hug. Kyborg probably starts bawling his eyes out. Carina gets to see a version of her brother that maybe isnt okay, but that is at least himself, and she promises to herself that nothing else happens to this one if she has anything to say about it.
Sorry it took me a bit to answer this 😅
So happy you enjoyed the idea for this AU and seriously cannot wait to share it. To keep thing simple in some ways, Cariana is going to be a fighter with main focus of being an archer. Seriously, they both love their parents but they both respect their mom so much and want to be like her.
But she going to be different in some ways from Kyborg, cannot have them both being barrel rolling.
And you shared some good ideas for sure on the characters for the AU but going a different direction in a way.
Like basically keeping the Borgian arm plot device so Quadron gets a pair of wood elf arms, lol.
Still working some plot stuff right now but for sure will share more when I get is all settled in my head.
#notes for myself#stinky dragon pod#tales from the stinky dragon#on the other hand Au#placeholder name#until I decide something else maybe
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(putting this up here as well in the tags. tw vent)
(pointing at my reflection in the mirror) you wonder why you get so upset when someone tells you something isnt real. you wonder.
ok storytime.
in 6th grade this person i was friends with would just. tell me that they weren’t real. they would be like ‘ohhh im not real youre imagining me’ and shit like that.
this obviously scared the shit outta me because i was fucking eleven! and i thought this person was so cool! i looked up to this person! (even though they were only a month older than me) i considered this person my best friend! (at the time i dont know if they thought of me being their best friend. tbh i was really fucking annoying but.) and them telling me this shit about them not being real actually makes me so angry to think about now! i would say ‘oh but i’ve hugged you before’ and they would say shit like ‘nope you imagined that you didnt actually do that’ like obviously they were lying and i knew they were fucking with me but it still freaked me the fuck out! i hate ‘what ifs’ !! (well. it depends. like this type of what if. not like ‘what if akita neru was the one that hypnotized miku and teto in mesmerizer’ because thats a whole other thing! sorry for the random example i didnt know what else to do) (i would also say things like ‘other people see you too’ and i dont remember what their response to that was)
once we were at the after school thing we would go to and they disappeared into thin air! and i was scared! and obviously i texted them like ‘where did you go’ and they responded like ‘oh i’ve disappeared. i was never real. im gone forever’ or some shit like that. i was so scared and i was bawling my eyes out! of course they reappeared and i was crying so hard
and im so fucking pissed about this! and im pissed i was still friends with this person until the summer before 8th grade!
like obviously they were eleven as well but this is just ugh. no! don’t do this!
they eventually stopped doing this (thank god) but it still affected me! DON’T FUCKING DO THIS!! this shit is not fucking funny or cool at all btw. if youre reading this please never do this to anyone ever.
ok thanks for coming to my rant i needed to get that off my mind
#vent post#vent#oops#tell me if i need to tag anything pleaseee!#tw vent#personal vent#tw rant#i invited this person to my dad’s wedding what the FUCCKKK#tw swearing#this is incoherent but omg#i am so angry this person would tell me i had schizophrenia
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🌺: I don't think anyone understands how sad I am now that carousel is over. From beginning to end I bawled my eyes out whether it was happy or sad.
People can say whatever they want but before i found this story is never knew what love felt like, and now I do. You describe it so well I genuinely feel inlove whenever I read carousel.
I dont think anythings ever gonna be the same again, I woke up just so I can read your story. Your chapters give me so much distraction from my problems and make me feel happy.
I'm so emotional at the fact it's ended, all your carousel fans probably feel the same way.
We're so happy for you though, please eat well and live a good life
aww sweetheart :(( saying you didnt know what love was before carousel and you feel like you're in love whenever you read carousel is so?? omg so crazy you have touched my heart :(( im glad you managed to find comfort in carousel that makes me so happy <3
i hope you're taking care of yourself anon <3
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