#(really close friends and my parents are sort of exceptions to that but that's bc i'm usually always comfortable with them)

[sillyengineerperson]

Some people still need to learn to ask about BOUNDARIES before you potentially cross them!

[myokk]

The Babbit siblings, Leonard & Eloise 🫶

Info about their dynamics/more about Leo:

This is also super dramatic😆 idk what sort of mood I was in when I made all of this up🙏

He’s one year older than Eloise. Ever since she was born, he’s been fiercely protective of her and loves her so much. His first year at Hogwarts, he kept sending her long letters about how amazing it was and how he was excited to show her everything the following year (even though it was all but assumed she was a squib, he still believed she would show magic & be admitted). Leonard was going to be such a proud big brother😭😭 not embarrassed about her at all but showing her off etc😭😭😭😭 The summer after his first year was the worst of his life. It was the summer Eloise was exiled from their family….he witnessed the whole thing…their mom completely lost it (á la Bellatrix) and would have killed Eloise if their father hadn’t intervened on time (but their father had watched and let it get to that point😔). Leo was left alone with a dying little sister and he didn’t know how to help her….he’d only JUST finished his first year of Hogwarts…and then she was taken away and their parents pretended like she had never existed. He had to as well…what else could a 12-year-old who’d been taught by birth to obey his parents do??

(it was IMPOSSIBLE to forget her…and yet he had to try bc the parents are really manipulative and emotionally abusive…and he was always raised to be the perfect son) And then when he returned to Hogwarts…he saw two twins who were also quiet and reminded him a lot of his sister. Their parents had just died and he kind of put his energy that he had been going to use to show Eloise everything etc into them and he became really close with them & Ominis. He and Ominis were also close because they have some experiences in common & honestly at the end of the day there isn’t that much difference in their ages) But then…after Anne was cursed Leo was DEVASTATED. He was going to lose another girl who was like a sister to him….bc of his parents he had never told them about Eloise (nobody except their family knew about her existence) and so he and Sebastian got into a HUGE fight. Because Sebastian had never heard of Eloise, when he saw that Leo was just as devastated as HE was… there was just no way that Leo could understand what he was going through, and Leo had no right to be affected as much as HE WAS😤

Like the dumb teenage boys they are, they couldn’t deal with their big emotions (Leo is also a lot like Eloise in that aspect probably bc of their parents…pushing away any uncomfortable emotions instead of dealing with them, until it builds and builds and he just explodes when they’re too much) and he and Sebastian took it out on each other and instead of talking they had a duel that almost killed each other😤😭😤😭 ever since then they’ve hated each other with a passion.

Pffffffff Eloise had no idea….she was really getting along with Sebastian but also wasn’t saying her last name at all and so the two of them had already started to kind of be friends before Sebastian found out that she was LEO’S SISTER😫😤😤 then he hated her too!! Bc he thought that she was in with her brother and they had worked together to TRICK HIM like a little evil inside joke…playing with Sebastian and his emotions like the previous yesr😔😔😔 (Obviously wasn’t the case, Sebastian just jumps to conclusions without thinking which is ALSO what happened when he and Leo had their huge fight😤)

But yeah now that Eloise is back Leo doesn’t know what to do….he recognized her immediately when she walked in the Great Hall to be sorted…🤯🤯 but he isn’t good with feeling emotions and neither is she and neither of them know how to recreate the close relationship they had as children😫😫

Leo is serious, quiet, bad with emotions, but when he lets someone in they are a part of his life forever (yes even Sebastian the dumbass)

Some excerpts from my fic that involve Leo 💓 it’s Eloise/Sebastian alternating POV, so this is all Eloise’s perspective:

“Leo had changed since Eloise last saw him. Of course he had, she thought to herself. It had been five years, after all. The same unruly black curls, same eyes. And yet…he almost seemed a stranger to her. He was taller, face more angular and defined than it had been at thirteen. Voice deeper. But, the expression of vulnerability and guilt written all over his face was something she recognized well. It was the same expression that he had the last time he saw her, the face she sometimes saw before falling asleep. Just as quickly as it flashed across his face however, it was gone, hidden behind a stony exterior. His expression hardened and he sat down just as quickly as he had stood up, averting his eyes. The students sitting around him were looking between the two of them curiously but before Eloise could begin to process this new situation, she felt a gentle push on her shoulder.”

“Her relationship with her brother had always had an undercurrent of fear running through it. No matter how hard she tried as a child, there was always something she had done wrong, and Leo was always there to protect her. Or try to, anyway. The two of them had always lived under the shadow of their parents’ abuse and didn’t know any other way of relating to each other.

But here, with Anne, Leo was murmuring apologies into her hair as she cried, reassuring and comforting her in a way he had never been able to with his own sister.

Eloise felt sick. Sick at seeing them, sick at her own jealousy. Had Leo replaced her with Anne - that year when Eloise was supposed to join Hogwarts - to try and cover the bitter disappointment of not being able to proudly show off his younger sister? They had spent so many nights that summer before her Hogwarts letter never came, sneaking out to the garden late at night, Leo reassuring her that she would be fine and telling her about all of the magic and wonder at Hogwarts that was waiting for her. He promised her that she could sit with him on the train, that he wouldn’t be embarrassed by her.

And then…

Turning away from the two of them, Eloise headed towards the apples. She hated the emotions roiling around inside of her. She should be happy. She had saved Anne, and now things were going to go back to normal, how they were before she arrived. Eloise trailed her hand on the back of the couch, trying to focus on the feeling of soft velvet, calm her racing emotions.”

If you read all of this….You’re amazing & I love you🥹💓🥹💓 tbh I have MORE about the two of them & their family, but this was already getting so long😵‍💫

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for yelling at my friend over discord?

@aita-throwary-blogggg1456789 for finding later

so. um. i realise i come across as massively assholey here but idk man. this might just be teenage angst/drama

basically i (16FTM) have this friend. lets call him O (16M) we met last year since i showed him around the school on his first day. we sort of clicked and became friends.

at the time i was questioning my gender identity and was talking to a couple professionals about possible mental health issues and disabilites i was suspected to have, and when i talked to O about it he was super supportive. when i came out as enby he accepted me, and when i eventually came out as trans he accepted me then too. i told him about the adhd and the anxiety and the depression, and he was cool with all of that.

the main problem starts at the beginning of the new academic year. i'd introduced him to a really close knit friend group of mine, and he also clicked there. i was pretty happy about it, before he started saying some um... iffy things. i had recently found out my parents were severly abusive and i had been conditioned to believe that it was normal. so i'd talked to my friend group about it and they had all been really supportive. except for O. he'd conveniently kept quiet whenever i'd start talking about it. recently i asked him (quite nicely i'd like to add) why, and he said he doesn't have the full story, and that i was probably exagurating. obviously i was hurt, since it took a long time for me to finally talk about this shit, but i brushed it off since he had a relativley smooth life and didn't really know.

later i was diagonsed with osdd, and i told my friends. O admitted to me he thought i was faking it for attention, since he had become close with another person in the friend group T (16FTM). again i was deeply hurt, and didnt talk to him for a couple months. afterwards i started talking to him again, but he kept making jokes at my expense

one night i was highly emotional after a whole thing which led to me to cry for a couple hours. he made yet another joke at my expense in the discord gc and i just snapped. i went into dms and yelled at him for a paragraph and then some. he hasn't replied or even talked to me and i'm scared i did the wrong thing and overreacted

i feel really bad about it but my firend told me i wasnt the asshole... but am i?

so tumblr, aita??

(if this posted again bc of tumblr being wierd im sorry)

[trickstarbrave]

TCS FRIDAY BABEYYYY

i just wanna talk about steren because i love him. sorry for what will no doubt be rambling u_u @the-elder-polls i will be including art and stuff as necessary bc i love my boyyyyyyy and ive drawn him a lot

he's technically a nerevarine. he isnt nerevar's reincarnation though, instead nerevar (trans) and voryn had a kid by accident and well. steren is the reincarnation of THAT child.

first lifetime in his early life he was born at kogoruhn and raised in house dagoth. The cover story is nerevar was on a pilgrimage for azura and voryn had a drunken affair with a woman. steren is born, voryn fakes the death of the random woman, now he has a son. very few people know the truth. nerevar wanted to raise him but he was originally born a commoner and while he's strong enough to protect himself, he wouldn't put it past anyone with a grudge to target a literal infant just to spite him. nerevar still visits often though, under the guise that of course he'd be nice to his closet friend's son

steren was born a few years before the war of the first council though. tensions were getting high between the chimer and previously quiet dwemer, and house dagoth being the spies for the chimer by and large discovered what kagrenac was up to. you know the rest (mostly). nerevar and voryn die, the tribunal become gods, the dwemer vanish, everyone becomes dunmer except ayem and half of vivec... tribunal had caught on though that steren was nerevar's son as well though and they think it is particularly cruel to kill nerevar's only child just because he's of house dagoth blood. so they pretty much wipe his memories for the most part and have him raised in house indoril.

steren grew up in house indoril, and eventually realized he was of house dagoth. he confronts vivec who had become a sort of mentor to him, and vivec tells him to leave it in the past. he was spared because he was an innocent child. house dagoth were destroyed because they were traitors. they had to be purged from morrowind. there is nothing in the past that will give steren the answers and comfort he wants and will only lead him to his doom. this goes over as well as you would expect with him leaving house indoril and looking for answers alone. at some point he got married and had a kid, but his mission was about uncovering the secrets of house dagoth the tribunal tried to bury and learn more about his parents. he's killed during a collapse of some ruins. his wife takes the kid and promptly leaves morrowind, fearing what the temple may do now that steren is dead

family line continues for a while, and during this time nerevar's ghost has been watching over them. he felt too bad leaving his son all alone in the world, so he silently watched over him, heartbroken. then steren died and nerevar followed his child, his child's child, and so on. up to the third era where steren is reborn to a dying woman on the run from some illiac bay nobleman. after she dies, steren goes to an orphanage. unknown parents, born under a certain sign, fulfilling the prophecy. he's arrested when, after leaving a house he was robbing, he stumbles upon a dead body at the completely wrong time. the trial is shit because this is the TES universe (guilty until proven innocent is canon fsr, dont let me ramble about why we'll be here all day) and he develops a fear of large crowds having their eyes all on him (idk what thats called). he stays 3 months in prison before being pardoned and shipped to morrowind. despite it being his home province he never heard great things about it.

he follows the storyline pretty closely. except that this is my world so mods like tamriel rebuilt are canon for me. he joins house hlaalu and the mages guild. he's really freaked out by all the sleepers who know him by name saying weird shit calling him 'prince' or some shit so he decides to take the opportunity to visit the mainland when the mages guild asks him to. on the mainland he does a bunch of stuff but finds vissamu and an ancient tome from house dagoth. he doesnt know why but he cant let go out of the house dagoth stuff. its familiar. but it also makes his heart ache.

more importantly though on the mainland is he comes across a dunmer who didn't know what house or family he was from. a nearby temple has you gather ingredients for a ritual to summon an ancestor spirit. steren does it correctly and then after seeing the guy happy to know who he is and able to build a relationship with his deceased family, asks the temple to do the same for him. an ancestor spirit is in fact summoned but before they can reveal who steren is, nerevar shoos them away. all steren knows is it fails but the priest sees what is clearly saint nerevar watching over him and tells him he doesnt know why it failed but that he is watched over well. steren hears a voice urging him to go outside and does so. there, nerevar reveals himself, able to communicate with him now, and tells him he stopped the spirit. she wanted to come and talk to him, but she was a woman of house dagoth (voryns mom specifically) and nerevar feared what might happen if his lineage was revealed to others. steren is kinda freaked out, asking if he'll go insane like some of the sleepers he sees, but nerevar assures him he wont let that happen.

back on vvardenfell steren continues his questing. gets corprus, cures corprus. goes to kogoruhn and finds at the old family hearth a bottle with what was originally his baby teeth as well as locks of hair from both parents, typical things to leave near the family hearth for protection. steren takes it with him, not knowing why he's so attached to it.

after getting the ring though he gets his past life memories back and realizes he's not nerevar reborn. he has memories of "uncle nerevar" in his first life. he demands answers, crying, and nerevar comes clean that no, he isn't nerevar reborn. nerevar didnt want him doing this either, but azura has no other options because nerevar refused to reincarnate and apologizes to steren. but steren asks how he can wear the ring then and nerevar is quiet before explaining that while he was alive he asked azura to modify the enchantment so that nerevar and his descendants can wear the ring. that steren's other parent was always nerevar, but nerevar couldnt be open about that fact because he couldnt bear the thought of his own child being killed

fighting dagoth ur is particularly painful because dagoth ur recognizes steren as his son but well. he's still insane. dagoth ur thinks steren is too corrupted and blinded by the tribunal who stole him away and brainwashed him, but dagoth ur can kill and remake him, just like he did his brothers. then he can bring back nerevar, purge the empire from morrowind, and live together as a family, proud and openly. defeating him was not easy emotionally or physically tbh, but steren did win.

also at some point he got trueflame. i havent figured out when he did the tribunal dlc quite yet. it might be while he was on the mainland if im being honest but i feel like almalexia would def spill the beans on who he is. maybe he takes out the assassins, comes back, gets the ring, and then goes to deal with the rest of the stuff from tribunal.

after daogth ur's defeat, azura comes to usher nerevar to moonshadow. spirits arent supposed to remain in the realm of the living for too long and he risks being completely destroyed. nerevar is worried, but steren assures him he'll be fine, and nerevar goes to rest. then azura says she'll give steren any gift within her power to him as a reward for doing such a difficult task, and steren says he just wants to be with his parents again. azura frowns and says she cant bring back the living. steren knows. azura is even more upset because steren is not that old for dunmer and is already asking to die. but instead of killing him she sends him to another world where his parents ARE alive. and also 200 years in the future where theyre together in hopes steren can be with his parents and live happily there. she's going to let this worlds nerevar and voryn have the memories of steren's world too so it wont be weird.

mephala though intervenes with the reasoning "you can just send people to different worlds and time periods. you'll fucking break the dragon." and drops him off not in mournhold but in blacklight, outside of a brothel where the reincarnation/child of vivec (named vivienne, who belongs to @wellthebardsdead) is currently being kept. in this world nerevar was the nerevarine, azura restored him to his status, voryn reincarnated, i wrote about them getting together here. steren, strongly resembling voryn, is taken in by force and fed poison to both diminish his strength and keep him from healing the injuries from dagoth ur. but he and vivienne save up money from tips and escape. steren couldnt take his ring or sword but he figures the brothel madam probably pawned them off and he should just gtfo of morrowind before the temple figures out theres two copies of nerevar's ring and sword and if theres an impersonator running around. they hop on a boat like a day or two before voryn and nerevar track down the brothel in blacklight to look for steren.

they get off the boat in.... SKYRIM!!! surprise, vivienne is the dragonborn too. he and steren are very close but very shy about admitting the fact theyre in love. theyre both traumatized and afraid of hurting the other or being rejected. im sure you can imagine.

look at how cute they are...

also since steren isn't the dragonborn he doesnt do much of the msq. he is more like a follower but he has some side content he does. he joins the companions, contracts lycanthrope (thanks hircine, not helping steren's opinion of daedra at all), ends up doing the forsworn conspiracy and after breaking out of the mine the forsworn take over markarth. vivienne does the thieves guild and steren helps with that bc he does know some dwemer from being taught it by both nerevar as a ghost and voryn when he was a kid. also he did the mages guild in morrowind so he knows a lot of dwemer stuff. oh steren also got fucked up by the heart of lorkhan a little and during the peace talks he did make the throat of the world start shaking when he got violently angry. steren is also not at all impressed with delphine (he already didnt like the blades for obvious reasons)

oh they also adopt a scrib. named mr scribbles. its later revealed scribbles is a girl but (sorry i cant draw bugs well)

alduin is defeated and vivienne comes back. steren was worried sick but is happy to have his beloved back. they confess, its cute, and steren gifts him a necklace he made with traditional house dagoth craftsmanship

shortly afterwards though miraak's cultists show up and despite what they want they have to go to solthsheim and deal with it..... ugh. while all this is going on nerevar and voryn arrived in skyrim and were trying to track their son down sort of on a wild goose chase. by the time they catch up steren and vivi are on their way to solstheim.

on solstheim they try to keep a low profile. steren uses a bandana to keep the big red star on his face covered. vivienne ends up getting turn grey and cold like vivec which doesnt help the vivec allegations. after he's turned steren starts getting some gold patches on him too (i forgot the red star like an idiot sorry)

one of vivienne's clients though survived the purge that voryn and nerevar did. his name is sen dres and he's been hiding out on solstheim getting enough political power to either go to skyrim and find vivi or get vivi when they come to solstheim. sen hates steren thinking steren is the one who convinced vivi to leave and his plan is to kill steren and take vivi back to morrowind to live with him forever. when he finds out vivi is the reincarnation of vivec he wants to force him to become vivec too because then he can have a god as his slave/husband. i hate sen dres so much. anyways he manages to get steren and vivienne alone and convinces vivi if he comes quietly they'll leave steren alive. only to promptly stab steren straight through the stomach and leave him there to bleed out while vivienne is gagged so he cant shout and drugged.

nerevar and voryn do arrive in time to help steren and heal him up. they were told by the house hlaalu dude actually what sen dres' plan was because that guy saw steren had the tattoo of a house hlaalu grandmaster and he doesn't want a potential high ranking member of house hlaalu to die. they get steren to safety and with the rest of the dragonborn gang rescue vivi and the two of them are happy together again while recovering :))) and steren gets to see his parents

steren and vivi also end up getting married eventually. yay!!!!!!

other stuff i couldnt figure out where to put it-- at first the good three think vivi is vivec. mephala sent steren to vivi to see if he'd betray steren to alleviate his own suffering. but vivienne did not, instead he took care of steren and wanted to escape with him. boethiah and azura both try to kill vivienne though. and molag bal thinks vivienne is vivec and should be married to him ugh. do you see why steren hates daedra.

[ramjams-obssesion]

Going insane bc freeze your brain could LITERALLY WORD BY WORD PERFECTLY BE SUNG BY NICOLE (except the parents should be gender swapped)

I've seen some ppl talk about heathers x Class of 09, but my hot take is Nicole isn't Veronica, but JD. Perhaps Jecka is closer to being Veronica, as she's gone to this school since primary and used to be best friends with Karen, who is also similar to Martha. (Also the lyric "you'll go to some colleague and marry a lawyer" fits her really well)

It's just JD and Nicole, the new kinda emo and sarcastic kid at school who seems to hate everyone, is sort of apathetic to everything and has a troublesome house life... also one of their parental figures is implied to have killed themselves, and the other is just. Terrible. Is also constantly moving from state to state. Also also ends up being to blame for the death of a bunch of... morally questionable people.

The only issue is that it doesn't leave much room for heathers,,, who are quite important for the musical heathers. So, Kelly, Emily, Ari, and Megan. Tbh, I have no clue who to assign who. Ari and Megan specially aren't really close to being stereotypical popular girls.

Ram and Kurt are a bit easier. Literally any of the boys that isn't jeffrey and Kylar. (truly the "very straight non-rapist" duo)

Jeffrey is just the random guy who wants to watch the heathers be eaten by rats.

Ms Ames would fulfill the role of Miss Fleming pretty well too.

(thinking about toxic yuri... and Emily could also fulfil JD's role, having Nicole Veronica. But this post isn't about that so.)

[shima-draws]

Hi all thanks for letting me infodump about my new kids <3 Anyway here’s their general info and personalities. They don’t have names yet so suggestions are welcome. Also elemental power suggestions are welcome (remember, this is within the ATS verse so it’ll have to be 1 of the 15 elements). Some of them are already set but not all of them so ;)

Protag boy: THE boy of all time. He’s lovable. He’s stupid. He’s absurdly powerful. He’s really chill UNLESS you mess with his friends then he goes apeshit. He’s got a boyish charm that every single member of the group is attracted to. He’s the official leader of the group and they would do ANYTHING for him. His childhood friend passed away due to an incurable illness so whenever someone gets sick he mother hens to the EXTREME. He rarely ever cries so when he does the entire group flips their shit trying to comfort him or trying to beat the hell out of whatever made him cry. And most importantly. He is BABY

(Yes I got inspired bc I’ve been watching too much shounen lately. I NEEDED to make the boy ever)

Mute girl: Originally she was a VERY famous singer but she “vanished” five years ago. She’s kept this a secret from the group. Due to trauma she has chosen to go mute and has not sung in a long, long time. She communicates solely through sign language and eventually the rest of the group picks it up. Is generally closed off, but opens up to the group as time passes. When she does finally get the courage to use her voice and sing again, everyone absolutely loses their shit at how beautiful her voice is and they all cry and it’s very emotional.

Rabid feral girl: Little feral child that is just a gremlin and was taken in by the group bc she had no family. She thinks of protag boy as her big brother and absolutely adores him. She’s also a BEAST in battle, one of the strongest members of the group. She has no memories of who she was before she met the group, and has a mysterious past that will soon catch up with her. She’s probably the most blunt out of everyone and can sometimes say rude things without meaning to. You want to get roasted by a 10 year old? Yeah she’ll roast you alright

Edgy boy: He’s stoic and strong willed and stupidly powerful. Has more of a physical fighting style rather than using magic. Was the first member of the group to fall in behind protag boy. Would do ANYTHING for protag boy, even betray the other members. Is surprisingly a really good dancer, but will only dance in public if it’s with mute girl (who’s also had dance training). Everyone is jealous of this. Is one of the few people to have known sign language from the get go, so he translates for mute girl a lot at the beginning. Might also secretly come from high society.

Standoffish mechanic: He’s a jerk, but he’s so lovable. Would die for protag boy. Protag boy gushes over his inventions and it boosts his ego way too much. He comes off as arrogant and cocky but he’s a real softie deep down :’) He butts heads with edgy boy a LOT. There’s some weird sexual tension going on there that nobody else wants to bring up. The “everyone is so not worth my time except for the people I love and care about” kind of guy. He will be brutally honest with you.

Non-binary parental figure: The oldest one in the group who watches over all the others. Very gentle and kind hearted, but willing to be strict if necessary. Acts as a sort of mentor figure to protag boy (and p much everyone else tbh). Is arguably the most powerful member of the group, but rarely ever uses their magic. They’re the kind of person that lets their kids learn their lessons the hard way. Is the first one to figure out mute girl’s story and acts as her confidant.

Violin boy: Has a history with mute girl and went through a similar trauma as her. Due to a misunderstanding he holds a serious grudge against mute girl which is eventually solved. He probably ends up joining the group. Or just runs into them once in a while. He’s socially awkward and can’t hold a good conversation to save his life…unless it’s with mute girl. Is actually very attractive but hides his looks due to low self esteem. Thanks trauma.

Himbo: I’m holding out for a himbo til the end of the night

(Dumb and strong and respects women and ride or die. Also gremlin girl’s best buddy and unofficial guardian. I really don’t have much else to say about him I honestly haven’t given him a lot of thought yet.)

Healer girl: Soft spoken and kind, she takes care of the group’s injuries and provides support in battle. Everyone’s a little intimidated by her bc she’s scary when they don’t immediately come to her for medical treatment after battle, or brush off their injuries. Grows close with mute girl. Is the calming presence of the group, and everyone comes to her when they are stressed. (This causes her to have a complex about being the calm one, the cheerful one, the one who always has their shit together. This is unhealthy. Lmao)

Smart girl: “I’m surrounded by idiots but they’re MY idiots” kind of person. Brilliantly clever and quick witted and has a sharp tongue. Thinks protag boy is SO dumb but she loves him anyway and has absolute faith in him. Has a loving family back home and gets embarrassed when her softer family side is brought up since she’s kinda arrogant and cold. Regularly spars with edgy boy. Gets easily flustered and then gets angry about it.

Cute baker: His pastries are SCRUMPTIOUS. He wears glasses. And has freckles. And he’s nerdy and kinda shy and awkward and he’s perfect. He’s more of a behind the scenes kind of strategist. He works with mechanic boy a lot to improve on their gadgets and gizmos and also on food related things. Is also wickedly smart but more in the book smart kind of way (while smart girl is street smart. Life experience smart.)

Now that you’ve met the squad…

(Also pssst tell me who you voted for in the tags/comments if you wanna!! I’m curious 👀)

[akuabel]

ranting about my fantasy ocs ; maria

okay okay, so i’ve decided to write abt my ocs on tumblr bc my memory is getting so shit and i’m gonna forget everything if i don’t jot it down. anyway, my fantasy story (currently nameless) is my oldest story! i love it sm and i hold it very close to my heart, i’ve never really told anyone about it bc it’s complicated and long. it has two (three?) parts so i split the timeline into pt. 0, pt. 1, and pt. 2!! we’re gonna start with characters from part 0 (pre war) soooo

maria

this is my baby girl, which is a bit self centered bc she used to be my self insert :3 but i love her so so much

maria is a witch, witches in this universe have a limited amount of magic at birth and they’re stuck with that amount for the rest of their life, the more powerful of a spell they cast, the more magic they use up, and no magic = death for witches so most have to use their magic sparingly

maria was born into a poor family where her father worked as a cook and her mother worked as a maid for this noble family, once she’s 7 years old they end up abandoning her at an orphanage bc they couldn’t afford to take care of her, the orphanage lets the children wander around during the day (mainly playing in the forest behind the building)

a noble girl named valkyrie, the same age as maria, ends up meeting maria in the forest, val had slipped into the river and maria had helped her up and (unknowingly) used her magic to heal the scratches val got, after that val came to play with maria every day until eventually she begged her mother to let her take maria home

at the age of eight, maria becomes val’s personal maid but they’re more like best friends that always hang around each other

this dynamic continues until they both turn 15, valkyrie is sent off to live with her aunt bc her mother died and maria is sent to work at another noble’s home (close friends of valkyrie’s mother)

maria starts working for the nevorwinn’s, an extremely noble family consisting of lord nevorwinn (no first name at this moment) (werewolf) , his wife rosie (werewolf), and their two twin sons malcolm and duke. duke sneaks out and is extremely disrespectful to his father which leads his parents to make maria his personal maid to make sure he doesn’t get into any trouble

duke and maria don’t immediately become friends but eventually, duke breaks down and vents about his life to maria and maria vents to him and they silently agree to always be there for each other, no matter what

the two end up going to each other a lot for comfort and have a friends with benefits sort of situation, they both have feelings for each other but duke doesn’t want to admit it

valkyrie comes back from her aunt’s house at 18 with her new boyfriend, phoenix, and reunites with maria. they end up forming a friend group of sorts consisting of maria, valkyrie, duke, malcolm, phoenix, aragon, and hyacinth.

i need to explain the kingdom lord but, long story short, the king is awful and everyone hates him

i’ll go into this in more detail later but basically there’s a revolution to overthrow the king

during the revolution, maria ends up pregnant and she panics, cries, breaks down, etc, until she finally tells duke, thinking he’ll fire her or have her killed, instead he comforts her and says he’ll be there for her and the baby, no matter what his father says, he’ll tell everyone about the relationship once she starts to show

sadly, due to the stress of the revolution, she loses the baby and duke suggests keeping their relationship a secret

that’s basically part 0 maria! (technically once the revolution starts it’s part 1 but no one except duke and maria know abt the baby so i just included it as a part 0 thing!)

[littlecactiguy]

Cavalier Yang

@yellowmagicalgirl on your theory about Yang being the Second's Cavalier in my recent Qrow fic in the Locked Tomb AU, I have some Ideas

(I have have thoughts on Maria/Alecto, but they'll have to wait bc this got long)

there is a nonzero chance I end up writing a fic set at Canaan House from Yang's pov at some point but I really really do need to sit down and sort out all the things I'm writing

Yang, by birth, is the first daughter of the Ninth House, and so should have been its heir. Except, she isn’t a Necromancer.

As a young child, she was raised on the Second, with Raven and Tai coming in and out of her life between missions (and Tai likely spent longer periods at home with her until his duties as Cavalier called him away). Thus, there was always a degree of separation between Yang and the other kids on the Second. They, and she, were constantly aware that she was a child of the Ninth (not truly one of them).

Then, Raven became a Lyctor, and the reason for Yang being on the Second—her parents keeping her relatively close while they where on missions—stopped being valid. Tai was gone, and Raven could no longer return home. Yang loved the grandmother she lived with, but she also fully expected to be called back to the Ninth (even as a child, being on the Second would instill a sense of duty in her, and the Ninth was her House).

Except the summons from the Ninth never came. Yang, so soon after losing her parents, felt rejected by the last family she had left.

In truth, politically, the situation was a bit more complex than she was aware of (due to being a kid).

At the time, the Ninth was going through a transitional period. It was slowly realizing that Qrow would be the Head of the House permanently, since Raven would never return, and begrudgingly coming to accept that.

Additionally, the Second saw an opportunity to exert power over the Ninth in Yang. They could withhold her from Qrow until he gave way to their demands (something like ‘we want to be sure the conditions on your house are suitable for the Child of a Lyctor, who we’ve been raising, so we won’t give her to you until you do x, y, and z’).

Qrow, who was already dealing with the Ninth truly recognizing his authority, considered what it would mean to bring a non-necro child, whose homecoming would be accompanied by the Ninth’s loss of autonomy to the Second, into the mix and claiming her as the heir, and decided against it.

From his perspective, Yang had her grandmother, probably friends, and an entire life on the Second, it would be cruel to drag her away from everything she’d ever known, just to force her into the center of a politically tumultuous situation. She probably didn’t even want to come to the Ninth anyway.

Except Yang did, and that rejection stayed with her as an unresolved hurt as she grew up. Especially as, a couple years later, news would reach the Second that the Ninth had declared its Heir, a girl child that Qrow adopted.

(I have the idea that Qrow would try to pass Ruby off as his bio kid, who he claims he didn’t know about for the first years of her life. He had a reputation for being somewhat promiscuous, so there’d be enough plausibility that, outside of the Ninth, where everyone knew the truth, it would be hard to challenge. The other Houses suspected but never saw enough reason to make the contestation.)

As a tween/young teen, Yang definitely would try to make a challenge. It hurt immensely that her uncle not only had refused her (that she wasn’t enough for him), but accepted some random kid as his own. Reaching those angsty years, Yang would realize she does have a valid claim to the Ninth. However, her efforts would never make it far. Though she had the bloodline, she’d still be a non-necro challenging a necromancer who could potentially claim that same bloodline. The support she’d need to succeed never materialized.

Back to those those first years after Raven’s Lyctorhood, Child!Yang would decide that she wants to train as a Cavalier. Her reasoning being that it’d be a way she could still go home to the Ninth. She could never be her House’s Necromancer, but she could do this one thing instead.

Except then Penny arrived on the Ninth, so that never panned out for Yang either.

So, Yang would grow up and be trained as a Cohort Cavalier. Her combat skill (as well as her status as a Lyctor’s daughter) would allow her to become the Cavalier Primary and travel to Canaan House when the summons come.

After some thought, I’ve think I’ve decided that the Second’s Necromancer will be Cordovin. Yang won’t be her first Cavalier (Cordo has extremely high standards for what she expects from them and isn’t afraid of demoting anyone from the role if they don’t meet them), but she will be her last.

Yang is vehemently against Lyctorhood. She doesn’t know the specifics of how Raven and Tai achieved it, but she does hold it as the thing that took her family from her. Yang goes to Canaan House not to achieve it with her Necromancer, but to stop everyone there from achieving it.

During her teen years, Yang’s reputation as being hotheaded at times and socially isolated from her peers (who also never forgot she’s of the Ninth), caused her to be targeted by the Blood of Eden to potentially turn as a spy/informant. The person they send to recruit her is Blake.

At Canaan House, Yang secretly works with Blake (off-planet, but who she maintains a covert line of communication with) to try to ensure no one comes close to becoming a Lyctor.

Cordovin finds out, and blames Yang for everything that’s gone wrong at Canaan House (including some mysterious deaths), but before she can act, Cinder makes her final move.

(I haven’t quite figured out Cinder, and, by extension, Salem, but they’re definitely A Threat similar to Cytherea).

Cordovin dies in the fight against Cinder (largely because she refuses to work with Yang at that point), while Yang and Blake manage to get the survivors off-planet.

They witness Ruby becoming a Lyctor from the sky, where they see her, in her grief over losing Penny, use a massive amount of necromancy to kill Cinder.

(Yang has feelings she can’t quite describe about it. A personal motivation for her coming to Canaan House was wanting to meet the girl who replaced her in the eyes of the Ninth, but she wouldn’t wish Lyctorhood on anyone.)

[butch-reidentified]

hello hello my lovely Tumblr gals!

I've been waiting to post about this until it was like, a forreal sure thing, but I'm SO excited I gotta share the news 🤩

soooo as most of you already know, my wife & I both have serious chronic health conditions, which come with severe chronic pain as well as all the other wonderful symptoms. We have been struggling to maintain a life of working full time, doing things we enjoy to keep ourselves sane, taking care of our 6 pets, and also getting chores/errands/tasks done like keeping the house clean, grocery shopping and cooking instead of frozen meals and doordash, etc. A couple weeks ago, I posted an ad on a roommate seeking page to "rent" out our spare bedroom. Except instead of money, the majority of the rent would be "paid" by helping us out with those sorts of tasks to help us live as close to a normal life as possible. I created a scaled system where the more assistance = the more the reduction in rent, with a very low cap on the money side of the rent bc we really don't want to take advantage of anyone or profit off renting out a room, so just enough to cover the basic costs. The goal was to find a mutually beneficial arrangement with someone who needed a place to live without paying the current horrifying rental prices of South FL, and was able bodied and capable of helping us out a bit (on their own schedule, around their other work/obligations).

I posted it pretty impulsively when I had the idea, thinking not many people would see it or respond to it, just sort of putting feelers out to see if there was any interest in that kind of arrangement. I specified female only (and of course got multiple messages from men). First thing the next morning, a woman who looks about my age sends me a message. She and her gf have been urgently looking for housing since the plans they had made had fallen through last minute, after they were already packed and everything with their lease ending at the end of February.

She was 100% good vibes right away. We messaged for a couple hours straight, just got talking, and intermittently throughout the day. It turned out there were so many strange coincidences between us, it was uncanny. And talking to her felt like talking to a close friend of many years, not a total stranger. That first day I talked to her, really good things happened to me the rest of the day. Solutions to problems that had been causing me stress for weeks or months fell into my lap. I'm not spiritual or superstitious or anything for the most part, but sometimes the universe is just screaming in your face that something is right.

We kept texting, and planned a video chat "wine date" to discuss the arrangement and get to know each other better. We talked for hours, past 2am, and it felt so natural. Never an awkward moment. We have very similar couple dynamics, we like the same lifestyle and hobbies, we have the exact same sense of humor and communication style, the first woman I had talked to and I go by the same nickname, their dog and one of our dogs are very similar breed mixes and born almost exactly just 1 month apart... I could go on. I mean we even buy the same brand of vapes 😅 They're clean freaks who enjoy cleaning together, and one of them is super into cooking and likes to keep an herb and vegetable garden (we have a huge backyard and have been longing for a garden for ages). I looked up their post in the group, which was posted weeks before mine, and they were a perfect match. We were looking for the exact same things in a roommate.

The decision was made that first video chat night (there have been more since). They were abso-fucking-lutely going to be our new roomies. I wrote up a unique lease, month to month like we both were looking for, and had it looked over by a lawyer, who said we're good to go. My wife and I have been gushing about them to all our friends and our parents. We've been calling it a "couples crush" 😂 I told them that, and they excitedly admitted they've been doing the same thing. My wife and I have also been so much happier and more productive and active since all this started.

These absolute angels have even offered to help us get the house clean from where it's at now instead of us rushing to deep clean before they arrive. They seem genuinely empathetic and like they want to help 😭 And we feel the same way about their housing and financial situation. We own the home, which means there's an inherent power dynamic when renting out a room, so I worked hard to talk to them and create a lease that would equalize as much as possible. My wife and I emphatically expressed that we want them to feel like it's fully their home - we remember from renting in the past how it can sometimes not feel like your home. For me, renting was damaging to my mental health. All the rules and restrictions made me feel unable to create a safe-feeling home environment. We don't want to put any restrictions on them when it comes to pets, drilling into walls, painting the room, re-landscaping the backyard, whatever. We also told them they're always welcome to give us feedback, communicate totally honestly with us about any of their needs, complaints, changes they want to the lease, etc.

Soooo with all that said... they're moving in on Friday! We are all counting the days. We already know we're gonna have a ton of fun together. We even agreed to have "family dinners" sitting together at the table a couple times a week 🙈 We are all just so dorky it's beautiful.

And! I accidentally said "gyns" referring to them in a message 😅 so I had to explain that, and they were SUPER interested and want us to teach them about radical feminism. Like??? We couldn't have created a more perfect roommate situation in a mad scientist's lab. I've been working on trusting my gut recently, as it never seems to lead me astray, and every instinct I have says this is Good.

[littlest-bugz]

Well, I can't ask anything about OCs if I don't know them, so can I have the rundowns?

Names, ages, something fucked up about them, aaand maybe some sort of relationship they have?

Oh gods, I didn't even realize that I have never talked about them INDIVIDUALLY like that iykwim? I'll give you the run downs of all of my main characters

Absynth / Abby || he/him || ageless/immortal || he's essentially The Devil of my universe, and therefore, causes a lot of chaos || lots of connections to pretty much everyone in some capacity.

Alec || he/him || 24 y/o || he has died before, nd now survives as a hybrid of a species I made up and a human || His brother is Zander, His cousin is Charles

Cassius || he/him || 9,024 y/o || probably has the most triggering story out of all of them, but that's bc hes a direct translation of my religious abuse || His dad is Flip

Charles || he/him || 27 y/o || grew up on an isolated farm in the middle of nowhere, pretty much has been fending for himself since he was 15 y/o, if not sooner due to neglect || He's Zander and Alec's cousin, and he is close friends with Donny, Emoc, Igor, Rodger and Samuel.

Donny || he/him || 26 y/o || a full version of the species Alec is half of- he grew up in the circus with his twin sister, Rosa || He is friends with Charles and Quinn [not on the list], and he has his sister [Rosa, also not on the list] and a brother [Jesse, also also not on the list]

Emoc || he/it || 26 y/o || Has died two times over and is death's bastard son || He is friends with Charles, Igor, Rodger, and Samuel. Alec is his very notable ex boyfriend

Fli'pyek / Flip || he/him || ageless/immortal || Lord of Wrath and Violence- very emotionally constipated after a life of no love || His literal other half is Jakk, and he, like absynth, p much knows someone in every regard. He is married to/dating Melissa [depends on timeline]. Also Cassius' dad. His Best Friend is Mr. Happy.

Igor || he/him || ageless/immortal || demon clown with one too many addictions and a rusted truck || Close friends w/ Emoc, Samuel, Charles, and Rodger- otherwise doesn't know anyone else.

Jakk'lyat / Jakk || he/him || ageless/immortal || Lord of Knowledge, Lust and Fertility, sleeps around way too much for his own good, but seeing 2 of his domains are kind of,,, sex adjacent? its pretty on brand || Flip is his literal other half, Absynth is a sexual crush type thing that he HATES, and he is loose FWB w/ Emoc. Also Samuel's Dad.

Johnny || he/him || 31 y/o || Former drug dealer that married his childhood best friend. Still gets into a decent amount of trouble, but bc he's co-parenting Zander's kid, he tries to stay out of it. || Married to Zander, helped raise Alec. Rodger is like a surrogate father to him.

Kia'xhu / Kia || he/they || This is, essentially, God GOD, except minus the dickhead bible. He doesn't really have any sort of mildly fucked up thing other than he's god || Madly in love w/ Absynth and Tique [not listed]

King Sunshine / Dorien || he/him || 402,048 y/o || Very not human and a part of my fantasy realm where there are no humans. His prophecy is to literally die and he's known that since he was like,,, the equivalent of 8 y/o || Knows Absynth very loosely, knows Flip a lot better since he helped w/ overthrowing his shitty dad

Melissa || she/her || 27 y/o || Died of terminal illness and is now resurrected as a demon- Absolutely hates that shes alive after she died but she's essentially going 'fuck it, we ball' endlessly || Married to Flip, friends with Johnny and Lorenzo [not on this list]

Mr. Happy || he/they/it || ageless/immortal || Demon clown who jingles when he walks- Too 'innocent' to have done anything truly fucked up, but has a curse of bad luck placed upon him, so he gets into a lot of sticky situations || Alterous-ly attracted to Flip, would love to be in a QPR w/ him. Knows Absynth loosely, but isn't a fan

Pierre || he/him || 26 y/o || Permanently age stunted due to extreme trauma he went through, and thus lives with his older sister, who is his caretaker || Friends with Johnny and Zander, but otherwise doesn't make many friends due to his sister being protective of him [but she knows Johnny and Zander, so she trusts them].

Rodger || he/him || 52 y/o || Bar owner that grew up with no family and an abusive partner/friend/something else. Raised a child while single when he was 17 y/o || Acts more like a surrogate father, but is friends with Charles, Emoc, Igor, Samuel. Johnny is also someone he's like a surrogate father to, but sees him less than the others.

Samuel || he/him || 26 y/o || Alcoholic thru and thru- Grew up homeless for most of his childhood, but managed to score not only a house for himself, but also his single mom. || Emoc is his best friend, but is also super close with Charles, Igor and Rodger

Zander || he/him || 30 y/o || Fucked up beyond repair [lovingly]. He has a large history of crime due to his upbringing, but put it all aside to raise his son with Johnny. || His brother is Alec [who he helped raise], his cousin is Charles, he is married to Johnny AND he is friends with Pierre. Doesn't like making many friends tbh.

There's others for sure, especially since I didn't list some, BUT THERE ARE THE MAIN CHARACTERS!!! And facts- Idk how fucked up the trivia is, but I tried KJVBDFJVBJF

[djemsostylist]

OUAT: What Went Wrong, Part 1

Truthfully to write about what went wrong with OUAT would best be encapsulated by saying "everything" and simultaneously writing a novel. The fact is that OUAT was doomed from the start, I think, in part because the original concept relied on a pre-existing IP and had to undergo changes from there, all of which I think were the worst. For the sake of both brevity and bc it isn't totally fair, I won't compare OUAT to Fables, the other famous "fairy tales in the real world" story. I do think that both could have existed regardless of the other, and OUAT could have done something different and still been interesting. Still I do have to wonder if trying NOT to be Fables made it hard for the writers initially, and that just sort of carried over into, well, everything. That and I just don't think, at the end of the day, the original writers/creators/showrunners were very good.

The thing is, I wanted OUAT to be good. I really did. I have always been in love with fairy tales, ever since my early days as a Disney girl, and while I'm not even close to what you could call a Disney adult, I have continued to love fairy tales. The magic, the wonder, the simplicity, but also the darkness which is inherent in everyone. I actually really like the initial re-concept for OUAT, which was to focus more on goodness and kindness and good always winning out--I am, after all, perennially on the side of the "good guys" in media, and the concept is one I think is appealing.

But OUAT was doomed from the start. To be honest, I don't think I needed to watch 6 seasons to make this list, but it is gratifying to know that the problems inherent in season 1 continue to plague the show through it's far too long run. Now it's worth noting that my issues with this show are the same as they are with many a show, particularly those of network tv back in the day. These issues certainly aren't unique to OUAT, but unlike many shows which started strong and devolved into something terrible, OUAT has virtually nothing to recommend it. And so, if I may, the list.

5 Things OUAT Did Wrong

The Casting: The casting was...bad. The problem with pretty much the entire cast is that no one, at any point, had any chemistry with each other. And I'm not talking just romantic chemistry, I mean friends, parents, children--at no point in the entire show did I ever feel a connection between any of the characters. It wasn't that they weren't trying--you could tell they were, but the lack of any sort of connecting chemistry made everything, everything, fall flat. In fact I think it's telling that the arrival of Hook made them do a rewrite because for the first time two people on the show had the merest touch of chemistry and it made the writers want to grab what little there was. The problem is that none of the characters felt believable in their roles, with perhaps the exception of Lana Parrilla as Regina. Jennifer Morrison was absolutely the wrong choice for Emma Swan. She's not a bad actress (she's not good by any means but she isn't unwatchable), but her energy and vibes are not fairy tale. She has what may politely be described as "resting storm cloud face", meaning she always looks downtrodden and vaguely haggard, which perhaps would have worked for early Emma with her walls, but doesn't work when she starts to believe and then becomes lighter and softer with the love of her family. Additionally, Emma is supposed to be 28--a pleasant age, honestly, and I approve, but Morrison was 32 at the time. Now, four years isn't that big of a difference, but her vibes push her older, and Emma ends up feeling more like a depressed 35 year old and less like a 28 year old who has been hurt by the world. She doesn't shine in her softer moment, and when she's put into dresses and girly things, the result is comical at best, and becomes outright ridiculous when they slap glasses on her and have her pretend to be 18. This is true of most of the cast. Charming and Snow White are at their best in the penultimate episode when they are forced to sing--the rest of the time, their vibes are that of lost theater kids who accidentally wandered onto a tv set--not a king and queen. Even the kid (and I hesitate to judge child actors because life is hard enough) just doesn't have it. He plays Henry extremely one note--a good kid who just believes in magic, and his earnestness only works for so long. At some point he's unable to transition to even the bare minimum moments of teenage surliness the script asks of him, and ultimately Henry leaves you tired. Lana Parrilla is the best at her role, because she manages to embody both sides of the character--the strength, cruelty, and anger of the Evil Queen, and the softness and understanding of Regina Mills. Colin O'Donoghue does alright as Hook, although at some point you feel like perhaps he's just phoning it in (though I'd hardly blame him). Emilie de Ravin as Belle suffers from the same issues as Jennifer Morrison--she's older than the character by a little and feels it by a lot, and her acting is barely tolerable most of the time. Robert Carlyle is a fine actor for network tv I suppose, but his role as Rumple is...strange. Again--I'd argue that he's too old for the role. Rumpelstiltskin should feel timeless, ageless--he's an immortal being after all--and instead you just sort of increasingly feel his age as time goes on. I know people will probably be angry for this, and to be clear I usually laugh at the idea that every has to be young in a show, but for this, you needed characters who could do both--feel young and vulnerable, seem ageless and strong, seem young but feel old. Instead, everyone feels solidly middle aged, and tired not in a "well of course they are always fighting evil" way, but in a "they've stayed to late a the office writing spreadsheets" kind of way.

The Story--the story makes no sense. None, whatsoever. The story was quite clearly conceived from the basic plot of Fables--what happens if fairy tale characters lived in the real world--but when they couldn't use Fables, they made a few changes and thought through--well nothing. The very basic premise itself makes no sense, and each season only makes it more of a headscratcher. The basic plot is this: The Evil Queen from Snow White casts a Dark Curse on a land of fairy tale characters to transport them to a land without magic, where in 28 years they will be saved by the Savior, who is a special magical person bc she was conceived by True Love, the most powerful magic of all. But I have a lot of questions, NONE of which are answered by the show. We know Storybrooke is frozen essentially--time doesn't move for 28 years, which is why no one ages, etc. But the question is this--why does no one notice? Did Regina, in addition to giving them false memories, also do something to make them never question things? Are they trapped in a sort of vague deja vu, groundhog day situation where things never change but are also not quite the same and they don't really remember the previous day but don't quite forget it, but aren't aware of the passage of time? Do they know it's years passing but the spell makes them not care/not feel it? How would you explain Henry coming to Storybrooke and growing and changing, when no one else does? I'll assume the kids Snow is teaching aren't growing--is that just a thing the spell makes no one wonder? Was Henry the only infant in town? Did he notice he was the only one growing up? And further--if they came to Storybrooke in 1980 something, and Emma arrived in 2011--why did they never actually seem to be living in the 80s? Emma arrived in a Storybrooke that has been, at least in flashbacks, perennially in 2011. How? Why? Did Regina pick a time period and time lock the town, and Emma's arrival just happened to coincide? Was the time picked by the Curse? How did Regina get Henry in, but no one else, in all that time, ever came in or out? Did the entirety of the Enchanted Forest get transported there? So there are old people and young people and babies and kids and everyone is just stuck and no one notices? How did time start advancing when Emma got there, but then no one else noticed that either? Did they wake up and suddenly Mary Margaret realizes that she has a closet full of 28 years of bird houses? Further, what was she teaching in school? No one ever left Storybrooke--were they even aware of the larger world? Was she teaching Earth world history? Math? Was everything just sort of a vague weirdness? They say Henry felt weird and that's why she gave him the story book, but they never say WHAT'S weird. The story is just like "yeah, they lived in a town frozen for 28 years in 2011" and then do like...nothing with it.

The Costumes--I assume the conversation surrounding budget and costuming went like this: "Choose a mall. Not a good one, one of those small, outlet strip ones that's almost going out of business. All the princess dresses must come from that one store that sells prom dresses for under $100, the rest of your costumes come from whatever stores have a 'going out of business' sign. Makeup from Claires, shoes from Payless. Nothing over $50. All weapons from Party City. They never closed Spirit Halloween so go wild." Because my god. The first time a fairy appeared on screen I gasped. Literally out loud because in all my wildest dreams I could never possibly have imagined a more embarrassingly hideous outfit. At one point in the show, about four episodes in, I assumed the costume designers were intentionally doing it poorly, because what earthly reason could they have for making it that bad??? Regardless of the fact that it was ABC and I know they had at least some Disney money backing them, the costumes were embarrassing at every level. Sticking grown women in dresses suitable for a teenager going to a party with sparkly eyeshadow does not a fairy tale make. It also makes it hard to take seriously.

Part 2...

[match-your-steps]

Ok I always thought the "I am ---" trilogy and the Clé trilogy were two separate things but I've also always been confused by "I am YOU," the featured track from the final "I am ---" album. Like, it's sweet and all, and it makes a little sense (the line "I see myself in you" really clears things up for that one tbh), but it's never really felt like a resolution.

If I think about it, though, the Clé trilogy seems to be another identity-finding journey that centers on separating your identity from others. I don't mean, like, uniqueness, but rather not relying on others for your sense of identity. If I'm right, then Clé is actually a continuation of the "I am ---" albums.

However, the I am WHO album kind of doesn't fit very well here, because the main featured track is "My Pace," which is about not paying attention to like. peer pressure and stuff and doing the things you want to how you want to do them instead without comparing yourself to others. That kind of feels like it fits better with the whole separating self from others thing Clé has going on.

I vaguely remember hearing that the other song they were considering making the main track for I am WHO was "Awkward Silence," which, don't get me wrong, I LOVE that song, but it does not fit the vibe of the album so I'm kind of glad they did not do that, but it's also about not feeling pressured in social situations.

I guess you could say "My Pace" and "Awkward Silence" fit the progression of the "I am ---" albums, in a way, because they're starting to realize who they are, but I feel like they're too far ahead for having a whole 'nother album left. To be honest, I've always thought "Question" fits the vibes the best.

Anyways, I have a sort of theory for how the progression goes and ties together between these 6 albums:

I am NOT - hold on a minute who do I really want to be? what do I want in life? are the things I want really the things people tell me I should/do?

Representative songs: "NOT!" "Awaken"

I am WHO - if I'm not who everyone says I am, then who am I? (starts discovering self a bit)

Representative songs: "WHO?" "Question"

I am YOU - forming a good relationship (of any kind; could be significant other, friend, parent, whatever), or perhaps returning to one. it could be like a new relationship they're very happy with or it could be reaching an understanding with the people they rejected in I am NOT. part of their identity comes from this relationship. a large part of their identity, actually, probably, because like. it's. I am you. uh yeah

Representative songs: "YOU." "I am YOU" "Hero's Soup"

Clé 1: MIROH - whoah guys I'm pretty rad amirite

Representative songs: "MIROH" "Victory Song" "Boxer"

Clé 2: Yellow Wood - wait actually something is wrong? life is not as easy as I thought (kind of like that)

Representative songs: "Side Effects" "TMT" (not gonna count any of the mixtapes bc they're really more like singles that just happened to be released in this album)

Clé: LEVANTER - I defined myself too much by my relationship with this person (maybe the person from I am YOU) and lost sight of what I wanted for myself, so when they left me (possibly in Clé 2) I no longer knew what I to do. However, I now realize this and can take hold of my desires for myself.

Representative songs: "STOP" "Levanter" (most of the other songs carry similar 'I'm gonna do what I want now' sentiments, however, they do not include the same ideas about breaking free as "Levanter" and "STOP," while it also does not in words, the fact that it is pretty close to being the same song as "Road Not Taken" from Clé 2 but with mostly different lyrics indicates a connection to the unsureness of that album with a sense of moving on from it)

From the resolution of the Clé albums, most of their albums follow a trend of confidence, like that in Clé: MIROH except they haven't gone back to an uncertain theme afterward. Not every song is so confident, but there were confident songs in the beginning, so why shouldn't it be the other way around?. Case in point: "Grow Up," from I am NOT didn't start with confidence, but it ended with it, and there's also "YAYAYA" from the album from even before their debut. In TOP, which, yes, is now like 3 years old or something (I'm really behind on their newer albums so idk what most of the songs are but I am literally actively working on it right at this moment) and was for an anime, there's "SLUMP," which was written/composed/arranged by Han and Chan so it definitely fully counts, and it's fully super not confident. Nevertheless, the fact that I knew all the songs up through, like, THUNDEROUS, and still had a really hard time thinking of less confident stuff means there's definitely a trend of confidence since the resolution of the clé albums.

[spadesolace]

okay so after rereading the prev chaps until the latest one , im officially stumped hsjsksksk- the more i read , the more i question bout lots of things 😂 (sorry bro , i aint the brightest)

first chap, u mentioned how with a click of her name , people can find out who yn was yet people still dk anything bout her priv life which prob meant that she only posts/people post bout her school life . she's also friends with sullyoon (is there gonna be a backstory bout her or was that just a filler?)

anw, let's try this hsjsksksk-

1. yn just enjoy teasing hanni bcs of the thrill . as u said, she doesn't even have to try hard to be on par with hanni . so , she prob don't care much bout the grades and only does it to annoy hanni since hanni is so competitive (ofc she is, her chances to get into her dream college/uni is at stake) . she find it fun, which something that she prob never felt before. or does she has an attachment issue? 😂

2. yn notices the small things bcs that's something that she wishes to have been b4 . something bad might have happened or it's bcs of her parents as well (?). like how she wishes her parents would do to her (pay more attention to her, etc).

3. regarding her life ... my theory would be something happened to her sibling hence why their parents r so protective and secretive of them (wdym except their father tho?) . yn's sibling is probably not in the picture anymore (hence why she moved school so jihyo can look after her). but that also the cause of her parents being neglectful bcs they're tryna busy themselves with work to forget bout it i guess.

4. yn doesn't feel like trying hard at school (take the top place) bcs she feels unnecessary to do so. her parents prob won't even bat an eye if she does so , that's why her coping mechanism is more into being playful and all cuz she just tryna live and have fun.

5. old money rich and food industry... why do i feel like there's something fishy bout it? 🤔 could it be that it is just a cover or her parents own like a multimillionaire company that has a lot of competitors tryna bring them down ...

bro, this is the longest I've ever wrote and im 100% sure it's not even close to the plot hajsksbdksk- 🤣🤣

also, would u be surprised if i said hanni fell first but yn fell harder? 👀

i hope my failed attempts on trying to guess entertains u enough so that u wont be too stressed out for ur exam ksksksks-

On ne voit bien qu'avec le cœur. L'essentiel est invisible pour les yeux.

HEAVY SPOILER CONTENT FOR DRAG ME DOWN 👀

also THAT LAST LINE IS FROM LITTLE PRINCE, RIGHT? ANON, BUBS, YOU KNOW THE WAY TO MY HEART

ok let's get this bread

she has socials but very private family, so anything about her family is hidden but school life such as events, that’s the only thing she allows to be public, and on top of that, she doesn’t really accept followers that fast

yes, sullyoon is her actual best friend, the only person she truly trusts with any information about her family and traumas. there's an entire chapter that would go in depth with yn's life as she opens up to hanni

1. yes, she really enjoys messing with hanni not only for the thrill of it bc we all know hanni is competitive but we’ll get there. yn doesn't try that hard to be a top student, just a little bit of effort here and there, as her future is sort of planned already but she's still given a choice. it's fun for yn cause she doesn't have that much friends who would tolerate with her teasing and she only jokingly flirts with hanni

2. yn is observant, she focuses too much on the small details, the patterns. like clockwork, she knows her family's schedule of when they're visiting them or when sakura needs her (little things chapter) she sort of got it bc of negligence from her parents but at the same time, like oh, the flowers were changed or a new batch of coffee beans at home that's not local?

3. OK HHAJDHASJKFHKAJHFA, I ACTUALLY ENJOY THE HISTORY OF THE PARK FAMILY ITS LIKE HOW WIL!YN IS VERY PROTECTIVE AND DOES NOT TAKE ACTION RIGHT AWAY BC OF HER RELATIONSHIP WITH HER FATHER.

the park family, yes, jihyo was the cousin that is keeping a close eye on yn but she transferred for the sole reason of having someone she is close with (sullyoon and jihyo). they're well-known, the parks are big bc one is in the music industry, another in the food world, some are in fashion, then you also have lawyers and judges, and the fact that no one knows they're connected makes it intriguing.

that's why yn has a choice, its nepotism baby (if yn chooses to work or take over the family business then that's when her parents would publicly announce that she's their daughter)

4. YOU'RE CLOSE BUT IT ACTUALLY IS SORT OF THAT. she doesn't care about grades, as long as she's not failing then she'll be fine bc her parents gave her a choice of what industry or corporate she'll work in

5. LAST ONE, BINGO. people are trying to find some sort of connection regarding the park industries, like are they connected or is it bc the surname is that common that people would assume they're related or what.

hahahaha I WONT TELL WHO FELL FIRST AND WHO FELL HARDER

[alittlepudge-neverhurtnobody]

okay lol i just sent an ask about T/A but i thought of a specific question -- have you thought about whether they've met each other's close friends/family? i love the idea of characters being so excited and anxious to introduce each other to loved ones (whether they're officially together or just friends) because they're so enamoured. like "i can't wait for you to meet this new person they're so great and you will love them" and/or "they're so great and if you don't think so then i will prove you wrong if it's the last thing i do"

aww yes this is so good!! at the start of their story both T and A think that this is just going to be a fun summer fling, no strings attached, no big feelings. so neither of them is really planning to like do much introducing, like no, my parents probably don’t need to meet the stoner I’m hooking up with on the dl. except … obviously they catch feelings. and T begins working with A so her friends get to know him, and A studied in a similar field to the aunt whose house T has been banished to for the summer, so they hit it off (and they maybe sort of hatch a scheme to get his aunt back with the sapphic love of her life).

more under the cut bc (what else?) this got long

at first A’s friends R & M do not like T bc he comes off as kind of careless and flippantly irresponsible and they’re on defense bc A has had her heart broken before and they are Not letting it happen again on their watch. he kind of puts his foot in his mouth and keeps accidentally saying the wrong thing to them in the beginning and they’re kind of just waiting for A to get this whole thing out of her system. A keeps telling them no, it's not like that, he's actually really cool, but he keeps trying to make her friends laugh and it keeps falling flat and she's like :\ i swear you guys. but they've also been telling her all summer to have a fun hookup/friends w benefits/situationship so they try not to be TOO critical of him to her face. but gradually T keeps showing up for her and they see him really make her laugh and feel appreciated and they start to come around a little more.

(A does not get to meet T's best friend C, who's back in T's home state, but they'll get along. A is more outgoing than C they both love animals and k-dramas and bad reality tv. A is more outgoing than C but they are both good-natured gossips who live for the drama as long as it doesn't involve them specifically.)

T is absolutely terrified to meet A's parents. they run into her parents on the beach or something one day and her parents invite him for dinner and he just freezes. he does not give good parent! everything about him, from his sloppy eyeliner to his tight jeans to his steadily-snugger punk band tees to his badly dyed hair probably screams RED FLAG. he’s TERRIFIED. also getting to know her parents over dinner … aka food … aka the main kink thing he and A have been doing … seems like a total minefield. she is also very nervous bc she knows how it looks to bring home this dude who looks like he got sucked into a hot topic circa 2008 and like, she’s been having a minor crisis about what to do with her life anyway so are her parents going to see this as some kind of cry for help?? is it safe to do literally anything food-related with T in front of her parents?? if her FRIENDS don't always get his sense of humor, her PARENTS almost certainly won't.

but he actually does really well with them! they think he's funny and kind of awkwardly charming and very different than the people A has tried to date in the past, and they can also kind of tell that he is really desperate to impress them. they are very gentle with him and he also doesn't know what to do with that because he doesn't reaaaally believe he deserves it. it's only a matter of time before they, too, realize he's a fuckup!

(dinner itself is sort of torturous for both of them bc T is, for better or for worse, an emotional eater and he is SO NERVOUS that keeping his mouth full of food at all times seems like the best course of action, but of course that is also sort of murder for A. she is VERY relieved when they get to escape later and T can groan and squirm and burp to his heart's content and she can appreciate it all without having to worry about getting turned on at the dinner table.)

thank you!!

[eddiebabygirldiaz]

Apologies, Ryan.

Parents together or no?

Siblings?

Maybe you grew up with extended family. Maybe you don’t talk to any family.

That’s sort of what I meant.

ahhh thank you!

my parents are still together and happy for the most part or at least i assume they are happy asdfghjkl

i have a big sister! we aren't really close or friends or anything but we got each other's backs when we need it. she has a little girl and two boys and they are the loves of my life

not a lot of extended family, at least not ones that i actually know and spend time with

honestly don't talk to a lot of my family, besides my two cousins bc they like me are black sheeps. my family is your typical southern christian family and are just-they kinda suck to be honest (with a few exceptions)

ask me on thing you want to know about me

[w0rldly-oyster]

Ok I’m currently like actively sitting in study hall but I need to get this out somewhere or I’ll end up complaining to someone I know abt something they don’t care abt or complaining to my mom who will be WORRIED bc she alrdy thinks I have no friends bc I cried to her like a month ago about having no friends. Anywyas so all my friends have planned senior trips and I didn’t get invited or like absorbed into a single group and it’s not that big of a deal but it’s just. So very indicative at where I am in high school like I haven’t made any deep enough connections where people THINK of me and are like we should invite her unless I’m actively present or like ask to be invited. I feel like I’m constantly destined to be on the fringe of an intimate friendship like I have a million acquaintances but no true Friends. I think sometimes abt what would happen if my parents kicked me out and I don’t honk I’d have anywhere to go where I’d be 100% sure they’d take me in. I don’t know. I feel like I can’t hold conversations anymore with people I used to share my deepest darkest secrets with and it just makes me really sad. The senior trip thing is just like the icing on the loneliness cake o guess. I don’t know. I hope things are different in college but I don’t think they will be. It’s been happening long enough that I think it’s just like who I am. My mom told me once that I’m like her in that I’m not really cut out for super close friendships and at the time I sort of disagreed but I think she’s right. And the way she said it she didn’t make it sound like a bad thing and maybe it isn’t for her but for me I think it really is. Especially since I don’t even know if I’ll have my family in the future. Will I just be alone except for coworkers who laugh at my jokes and acquaintances that i stop texting with if I don’t see them at least once a week? I don’t know how to be different. I don’t know how people make close friends. It’s just not something I’m good at