#(im just bitter from how much this project Took From Me and how little i have been rewarded)

[corvidcall]

Tell me about your WIP :>

my WIP?? ah, you must mean THE ALBATROSS AROUND MY NECK

do you want an extremely long fanfic for a 15 year old free browser game? do you want a fic thats mostly focused on OCs, that only depicts two fan-favorite factions to talk about how they're evil? do you like fics that inexplicably have a lot of discussions about communist theory? not actually THAT much but like... wayyy more than you would have expected in a fanfic, and it's brought up inelegantly every single time??

well... that's weird. why do you want that?? your life will not be easy. that being said, perhaps you can enjoy The Book of Red Murder, my Fallen London fanfic that has been on a "short hiatus" for over a year because i wrote too hard and now every time i open Scrivener i have a panic attack!!! at 82k words, it is MAYBE 60% done. will it ever be 100% complete? its funny you should ask that!!! (gets real cozy in bed and goes to sleep)

[itsmarsss]

Scandalous (Blitzø x Fem!Succubus!Reader x Stolas) [Helluva Boss] pt. 1 - The Prince

How the mighty do fall.

(Getting into a weird three-way situation with an imp and a succubus isn’t exactly considered classy, Stolas.)

pt 1 | pt. 2 | pt. 3 | pt. 4 | pt. 5 | 1st bonus | pt. 6 | pt. 7 | pt. 8 | pt. 9 | 2nd bonus | pt. 10

Word count: 1,520

Warnings: I mean. depression. arranged marriage. this part doesn’t contain actual sex only mentions of it but others might idk, me taking myself way too seriously writing this, this has no dialogue but don’t give up on me im actually a pretty dialogue heavy person but this only works if this chapter has no dialogue

dividers by @cafekitsune <3

If you ever asked Stolas, he’d say he was never one to cause a scene.

If you asked anyone else, they’d say he’s lying.

Stolas had always been fond of a little drama and drawn to a bit of flair, akin to exaggeration and grandeur like no other. Be it in the way he speaks, acts or reacts to hell around him, be it how he expresses his emotions or his thoughts and even his feelings towards others.

Emotions, thoughts, feelings. Stolas was always full of those, ever since he was an ugly, pink, featherless little project of a bird. They have been all-consuming ever since he can remember. And he remembers.

Stolas can recall the confusion in his father’s voice whenever he cried as a kid, as if the action was strange and foreign, unfit for a demon like him.

And perhaps it was.

Stolas remembered many things, and yet he could not recall a single time he had seen his father cry- or show any sort of weakness, for the matter. Paimon was always stern and centered, and Stolas is sure the only thing close to weakness he’s ever expressed was his inability to be more than his status- to be an actual father. He doubted his father would consider that a weakness.

What was fatherhood next to being royal, anyway, right?

It was disconcerting to grow up certain that, between his father and all of his brothers, he was, without a doubt, the weakest. After all, how could he not be? He was scared, of a many things, most of the time. He felt things too deeply in his heart and he worried too much and too often about way too much. He was well aware of all of that.

But, as he grew up, Stolas decided he was fine with it, if it meant he got to genuinely feel things. Because Octavia had come to exist, and he could never in his heart find the willpower to act as cold to her as his own father did to him.

Yes, he decided he was fine with being weak, if that’s what being able to love unconditionally took. He was fine with being weak, if that’s what being loved took.

He may not have loved his father, or even liked him, for the matter. But he promised to himself he’d do anything it took for Octavia to love him.

And how it filled him with pure and utter joy to feel loved for the first time in his life.

He may not have loved Stella, either, but their union had brought him his daughter, and nothing in the entirety of the universe mattered more to him than her. And so he was grateful for their arrangement, after all, despite the bitterness of it all.

With Octavia’s teenage years came the flood, though. Stolas cried himself to sleep almost every single night for years to come as he was reminded of the fact that being grateful for what his marriage brought him was not enough to make him happy to be in the situation in which he found himself, unable to exist as he was inside of his own home without fearing the judgement of a wife who loved him just as much as he loved her - not even a tiny little bit- and unable to shield his daughter from the unhappy family he’d once feared she would have to endure.

Stella was never someone Stolas particularly liked. In fact, he quite disliked her, from the moment he laid eyes on her as his father told him they were betrothed to one another, at much too young of an age.

At first, it surely was purely the hatred for the fact that his fate was tied to her and there was nothing he could do to escape, and the sense of impending doom that came with every year that passed as he knew he grew closer to approaching the day there would be turning back, and watched the time pass as an expectator of his own life, as there was nothing he could really do but comply.

Royal life had its renounces.

When the day came for their marriage to be sealed, the moment finally materializing itself as real instead of bad news he’d try to push away and avoid dwelling into for too long, Stolas promised himself he’d try to get over those feelings and make an effort to know her better. If they would be tied to one another from this moment on, he could at least try to make it all not so miserable.

It was a task set to fail.

When Octavia was conceived, Stolas felt nothing but relief. After all, this entire situation was based purely on business, all-dependent on the birth of an heir. Which meant, in some way, they were a bit more free than before. However much that can be in the situation they found themselves in.

Relief came first, dread came second. At only 19 years old, what did Stolas know of parenting anyway? Logically, he knew this would be happening. Logically, he’d known that for almost a full decade. Logically, that should have been enough for him to be prepared.

But he felt anything but prepared. How was he, who felt lost at all times, who cried at the slightest things, who didn’t ask for all of this, supposed to be a father? What twisted parameters did he have, considering his own?

He only hoped time would ease those feelings.

Throughout the years, he learned those feelings never do leave you, and that parenthood is forever a state of worry. You never truly feel ready- there’s just not much more that you can do than try your best.

To be loved by Octavia was enough. Or… at least it should be, shouldn’t it? Was it selfish, or perhaps even inconsiderate, unfair to her that at times he found himself longing to be loved by someone whose existence wasn’t bound to him? Wishing to know if someone would ever care not because they were betrothed to him and not because they were his own blood, but simply because they liked who he was? Enjoyed his company? Felt genuine attraction towards him?

When thoughts of the sorts consumed him it was hard not to punish himself mentally for thinking such frivolous things, for having such superficial wishes. But it wasn’t hard to figure out where it all stemmed from. After all, when the only partner you have ever had in your entire life hadn’t any say in choosing you, it’s only natural to wonder what it would be like to be with someone who did choose him.

When you’ve had no say in choosing the only partner you’ve ever had in your life, in turn, it’s only ever natural, too, to wonder what it would be like with someone you would have chosen to be with. Someone who excited you, who made you feel things. Stolas didn’t even know what exactly those things were supposed to be, but spent his days longing to feel them nonetheless.

The day Blitzo, someone he hadn’t heard of in decades, was caught trying to sneak into his palace, during the most depressing party ever thrown in all seven rings, Stolas felt excitement for the first time in a long while. It’s almost like his brain had a reaction before he even processed it, like it was stuck repeating the same thing over and over and over: Friend. Friend. Friend.

Sure, Blitzo wasn’t his friend. They hadn’t been friends for, once again, literal decades. In fact, they had only ever been friends for about a day.

But Blitzo was his first ever friend. And you don’t just forget that. Stolas never would, at least.

And in that night they spent together, something in Stolas changed. That night, he felt wanted. For the first time in his life, he felt desired. For the first time in his life, sex wasn’t just business. It wasn’t just an obligation or a means to an end. For the first time in his life, sex was fun.

He knew it was supposed to be fun. He knew it was fun for most people. He had just stopped hoping it would ever be fun for him.

And, sure, he also knew what they did was wrong. But he couldn’t get himself to care as much as he probably should have, because, truth be told, Stella could pretend to have been hurt by it however much she wanted, but they both knew she never really was.

“That was the sound of a fucking divorce!”

A couple hours later, sitting on his bed in shock, he could still barely believe he had really just done what he did- what they should have done so long ago- and Stolas just started laughing to himself. The more he laughed, the harder it was to stop. He knew he just had to be like a maniac like that, but couldn’t possibly get himself to care, because, for only a split second did the thought of not being supposed to let his servants see him in that state pass through his mind, but it only made him laugh harder.

He’d just announced his divorce to the wife he’d been set to marry since birth, can’t get much more scandalous than that.

A/N: would you believe me if i said this started as an idea for what was supposed to be only a funny silly little oneshot with dick jokes and public embarrassment?

Requests for Blitzø and Blitzø x Stolas are open! I’m also SO hyperfixated on this show rn so if y’all wanna chat abt hcs or this series be my guest I’d be happy to talk and i don’t bite unless asked nicely luv y’all <3

[idyllic-affections]

DON'T.... BECAUSE KAVEH'S YOUNGER!SIBLING BEING ANGRY IN THEIR STEAD.. im so sorry for swarming ur inbox but ydbihsjakdas

i could just IMAGINE their arguments about it

"she's our MOTHER, you don't disrespect her like that!"

"yeah, but she ABANDONED us!"

"she didn't abandon us-"

"YES SHE DID! she ran away and left us here, in sumeru, because she was hurting. i know."

"she deserves to be happy-"

"but what about us? what about me? what about you? she sounds SO much happier with our step siblings, and she doesn't even visit us! you can't keep defending her!

you can love her all you want, i don't care. you say she's our mother, but she's been absent ever since dad died."

"you have to understand-"

"I DO UNDERSTAND! and you took care of her when she was sad. you took care of me because she was sad. you were a child too, and you were more of a mother to me than her!"

"don't say that-"

"just because she's my mom doesn't mean i have to like her!"

kinda projected here but good god this makes me wanna explode. i like to think kaveh's younder!sibling has been going through that "rebellious teen phase", but it's not a phase, it's just how they are after growing up with a pretty absent mom and dead dad. they see how much their brother suffer, they 100% wanna help him, but they're going through it too yk??

imagine how frustrating it is for them whenever kaveh talks about their mom and he always says nice things about her but they could see the sheer bitterness, guilt, and melancholy in his eyes. they can't help but hate her for not being there for them (i like to think they're maybe an infant or very very young when it happened) n making their big bro, their parental figure, go through this horrible mess.

n they just kinda grew up with that hate w/o telling kaveh bc they didn't wanna add into his plate of problems. but the hate slowly manifested with other stuff until they went from 'not wanting to cause trouble for kaveh' to 'i cause trouble because i can't control myself and i need to release my anger on something else'

so ya i think kaveh's younger!sibling would be temperamental n people see them kinda like a bully, opposite of kaveh :( even if kaveh raised them kindly, i think reader's hatred to their mom saved them from copying kaveh's self destructiveness...

which caused kinda of a strain in their relationship when reader became a teen

(on the flip side for some reason i think reader would get along with alhaitham more (which would hurt kaveh tbh) bc alhaitham's mentality clashes so much against kaveh's n it's probably what reader needs more... they probably preferred alhaitham's "you're allowed to get angry at things you felt was unfair, even if she's your mother" than kaveh's "she still loves us... she just- she just needed to move on to be happy. she deserves it.")

sorry i kinda developed a whole reader here and maybe this is incoherent blabbering im gonna hide now >q< feel free to ignore !!

NOOOOO NO DON'T HIDE I AM HEARING YOU OUT SOO MUCH RN WE ARE ON THE SAME WAVELENGTH

ohhh the strain that would come as a consequence of that rage and pain... sigh. parentified kaveh is so real, honestly, because with how bad faranak's mental health became, she definitely would not have been able to raise her youngest child. kaveh would be the one to raise them. kaveh would be the one they ran to when they scraped their knee. kaveh would be the one to kiss away their tears. kaveh would be the one to help them with homework and little things like that.

it would always be kaveh.

(and i think faranak would be painfully aware of the way they no longer come to her for comfort and consolation, but i don't think she would be able to feel bad about it until years later, because she's already so... fucked up. she would just be glad that someone was nurturing her child, even if that had to be kaveh.)

i think [name]'s anger would be a good and important testament to how well kaveh really raised them, though.

(but of course, it would also prove dangerous and self-destructive which i mention a bit further down in the post!!)

one who values themselves is one who feels angry when mistreated.

and [name] is fucking livid, for both themselves and kaveh. [name] is aware of faranak's neglect. because kaveh taught them to love themselves more than he could ever even hope to love himself. kaveh raised them well, even if that responsibility never should have been his in the first place.

so it honestly hurts them both when they fight like that.

"don't you dare disrespect her, [name]. you have no idea what she did for us." "what she did for us?! what the hell-- kaveh, she left us for some random fucking guy neither of us have ever met! how can you not see what's wrong with that?!" "do not talk about her like that. she did her best. doesn't she deserve to be happy, [name]? doesn't she?!" "oh," they'd scoff, "so 'her best' is abandoning her kids, parentifying her oldest son, and running from her past like a fucking coward?" they would roll their eyes and turn away at that point. "no, kaveh. she doesn't. neither of us are, so why does she deserve to be happy?" they'd then leave.

and consider this dialogue somewhere in there:

"she isn't my mother. she didn't raise me. you can like and defend that woman all you want, but she never was and never will be my mother."

they care so much about what kaveh went through for them. they are so painfully aware of the sacrifices he made to raise them. you know how parentified oldest siblings are usually the only ones aware of the abuse and neglect, whereas the younger siblings they raised think their parent is an angel who did no wrong? it's the opposite here.

and [name] getting along better with alhaitham in their teens... you are so right. they would.

i can imagine them fighting like this in alhaitham's home, and when [name] finally gets pissed off enough that they just leave to cool down, kaveh also retreats and stays in his room for a bit. but a few minutes later, when he comes back out, alhaitham is gone.

he left after [name], because a pissed off teen out wandering alone in sumeru and possibly sumeru's wilderness is unsafe.

(i feel like [name]'s anger could translate into ambition. hmm. pyro vision [name], maybe?)

kaveh knows they get along better with alhaitham nowadays, and i think it hurts him so much. but... he also does want what is best for them, and maybe. just maybe he is not best for them anymore.

(little does he know, they cry a lot to his roommate about just... wanting their brother. but not being able to open up to him like they used to because he'll only keep making excuses for their mother. and he'll only keep hurting himself in the process. and they don't want to see him destroy himself.)

alhaitham would validate their feelings more than kaveh would. he believes they should be pissed. he's not good with tears and feelings in general, but he is rather decent when it matters. and it very much matters when it comes to kaveh's mentally and emotionally wounded younger sibling.

i think alhaitham is better for them at this point in their life. and, you know, i feel like... in a way, he could help them learn to be less destructive. because also i feel like [name] is self-destructive in their own way, too. they get pissed and push away the people they love (aka kaveh). and they're hurting themselves in the process, but it's in a less obvious way than how kaveh is hurting himself (all the overworking, constantly doing everything for everyone, etc etc).

alhaitham is so blunt and straightforward and it would be refreshing compared to the mental gymnastics kaveh does to justify what faranak has done. and honestly, the factual truth is that [name] is allowed to be angry. alhaitham knows that and he's very clear about it.

and hear me out--

[name] enrolling in the akademiya, but instead of the expected darshan (kshahrewar or something similar)... they enroll in haravatat. just a thought.

they're probably just kind of mean in general compared to their brother, and i think that comes as a surprise to a lot of people, but i mean... who can blame them?

they need to go to family therapy HELSPDKDHSKGA

[domokunrainbowkinz]

off the top of my head I think my fave reads of this year would be:

turning (webnovel)

little mushroom (danmei)

concubine walkthrough (manhwa)

orv (webnovel)

on the other side, these were the reads that pissed me off the most (put under a readmore bc I got Thoughts that have already been expressed before BUT. I need to yap more)

painter of the night (manhwa): god. I wish I dnf'ed this but the hype was so high I held out hope. the art, atmosphere and general dreamy joseon vibes are 10/10 no notes but the STORY....the CHARACTERS...bruh if this had a decent story with well written characters. we could've had it all. THE PREMISE IS INTERESTING TOO...like idk maybe I'm being too mean and just projecting my personal likes on this but the story could've been so much more interesting if nakyum wasn't written Like That. idk man. I'm a hater.

how to refuse the route (manhwa): THIS ONE BROKE MY HEART. IT LITERALLY STARTED OFF SO STRONG AND I THOUGHT THE LATER CHAPTERS WERE BUILDING UP TO SOMETHING, BUT!!!!!!!! THEY RUSHED THE ENDING. the ending was like "ok lalalala he got over his issues he actually likes ilya they got married wahoo!!!" NO. U GOTTA EARN THAT SHIT. U CANT JUST SELL ME THIS HANDWAVEY SHIT AND EXPECT ME TO BUY IT. I thought there'd be at least another season fleshing out the consequences of ilya being able to see the system, Jerry realizing he needs to stop thinking about this as a game, also the thing about his mana leaking out??? sooooooo many loose threads...NONE tied up....I'm so bitter.

why ophelia couldn't leave (manhwa): SO many ppl were like "ooooh they're both red flags oooooh they're manipulating each other" gurl did we read the same manhwa....like in the beginning it was true and I was like "ohohohoho" rubbing my hands but then they got together. and it went POOF....I guess I was expecting it to be more toxic but it honestly lowkey got boring for me. also the ML wasn't even that manipulative he just has a 1 track mind that was honestly very bland to me. I was expecting spice...and I got...bread...

red limit (manhwa): I will FOREVER be bitter about this one. misunderstanding trope my beloathed...and it wasn't even done well. like it was the most hamfisted, clunky and awkward conflict that they stuck in near the end just for the sake of angst. like im sure there are a myriad of diff ways they could've done something like this. I'm so surprised it took such a big nosedive bc the rest of the manhwa was so beautifully written with maturity and care....wha happuh....did the writer pass it off to someone else to write the ending....if it weren't for the ending I would've easily recced this. But. here we are.

necromancer survival (manhwa): THIS ONE...MAY BE...A SPICY TAKE...and I tried so so hard to like it but it just did not click for me. I almost wish it didn't have romance bc imo it just was not well done at all. maybe I just read it too fast or something but the rship felt like it wen from 0 to 100 in a really short period of time, and a majority of the time it felt super unbalanced feelings-wise. i felt like the MC had super strong feelings for the ML but the ML like. didn't give a shit?? and the way the MC kept angsting over unrequited feelings got me like "ok that's enough. Stand Up". idk I was really mad that I didn't like it. not sure if I was mad at myself for having unreasonable expectations or mad at the story for being mid or mad at the community for hyping it up. everyone recs this as a good BL dungeon crawler but it just was not for me.

[nel-world]

hi

forgetting lines

phone

DRAMATURG PAT i read the new pages you sent me. I see more of an authentic character here. He has flaws but he's… aware of them. STUDENT Yes. So, it's good? DRAMATURG PAT We're on the right path. STUDENT What else do I need? DRAMATURG PAT What is he going to do with that? Is he planning to change his flaws into something better? STUDENT Well… he's…to make it a compelling arc. Then, i know the context, as an actor, it becomes easier to perform.

/// STUDENT: (Looking down at his phone, visibly nervous as he waits for a reply. Still no answer, he shifts uncomfortably.)

TEACHER: (Interrupting the scene, raising a hand to halt the action.) Stop, stop, stop.

The scene freezes. The Teacher turns to face the Student.

TEACHER: Are you busy?

STUDENT: (Startled, looks up.) Me?

TEACHER: Yeah, I'm talking to you.

STUDENT: No. I was just…

TEACHER: Is it more important than what we're doing here?

STUDENT: (Quickly shakes his head.) No, it's not that important.

TEACHER: Then let's get back to the scene.

///

how much money ?? this is not credit card transaction

this is art

///

Teacher: When my father was canceled, everyone told me, "Don't make a film with him. Whatever he touches doesn't release." I was so angry, hard, and bitter. If I have a problem with someone's work, I talk to them directly.

Student: Yeah, it’s so easy for people to label someone, but they never try to understand their journey. One mistake, and suddenly that’s all you are to them.

Teacher: Exactly. They don’t see the sleepless nights, the passion, the dedication that goes into creating something. Whether I like a film or not, it involves as much hard work and passion as something universally praised.

Student: I get that . It’s frustrating to be reduced to one project’s failure.

Teacher: That’s the harsh reality . People love to put others on a pedestal and tear them down just as quickly. But real resilience comes from standing back up, despite the criticism.

Student: I’ve learned that the hard way. It took a lot of introspection to move past the bitterness. I had to remind myself why I started making films in the first place.

Teacher: And that’s what’s important. Remembering your passion and not letting the noise drown it out.

Student: It’s still tough, though. Every time I start a new project, there's this lingering doubt. What if no one shows up..

Teacher: But you have to keep going. Trust in your vision and the process.

Student: Thanks, that means a lot. I’m trying to focus on the work and not the noise.

Teacher: That’s the spirit. Keep pushing forward, no matter what they say.

////

Student: I want to do newer stuff and push my own boundaries, knowing I face the consequences if I fail. (Glances out the window at the setting sun.) )im worried if people will show up or not, it's like a damn rat race.

Teacher: (Nods, the light casting a warm glow in the room.) Absolutely, everything has become like a credit card transaction. It can stifle creativity eople always put everyone in a box. It’s not just me.

Teacher: (Sighs, running a finger over a well-worn script.) Right, and it’s so limiting. amd people get shafted 'cause they don't fit society's neat little labels.

Teacher: (Leaning in, with a hint of nostalgia.) That’s the right mindset. Authenticity in your work is far more valuable than conforming to commercial expectations. Keep focusing on what you believe in, and the rest will follow.

Student: (Feeling a sense of validation.) Thanks, that means a lot. It’s reassuring to know that staying true to my vision is the right path, even if it’s not always the easiest one.

Teacher: (Patting the student’s shoulder, a glint of pride in his eyes.) It definitely is. Remember, some of the best artwork were initially misunderstood or not commercially successful. What matters is creating something meaningful and true to yourself.

[kindred-spirit-93]

good evening yall! time to share some more of my most recent oc! long post and bonus bad art at the end :D

general:

i havent settled on a greek name for her yet but jazzy is her working title lol (jasmines are her favourite flowers and she likes jazz lmao)

she goes by kore though, an homage of sorts to persephone

vague design ideas as of now are perpetual dark undereye circles, short dark hair somewhere between waves and curls, and her colour scheme is rose olive and black.

aroace potato!! still figuring stuff out but rn shes demiromantic ace and makaria is aromantic demisexual. yes this is very important information.

dark sense of humor, deadpan delivery and sarcasm befitting a child of the underworld. loves dad jokes and puns tho.

aloof. very calm, extremely quiet. guarded. always has ink on her fingers. warm and caring to the few people in her inner circle

background:

underworld diety; daughter of makaria (goddess of blessed/ merciful death). her father as of now doesnt exist but there are implied implications later.

as grandaughter of hades and persephone not only does she have a special place in their hearts, but the entire underworld adores her (sometimes begrudgingly lol. shes adorable)

case in point when she was smol hades would have her on his lap while on his throne and persephone would make both of them flower crowns :')

mama makaria was busy but always did her best to put her to sleep and tell her stories of decorated heroes and beloved figures as well as good hearted mortals who died for good causes

is very close to her mother but also distant? theres work to be done and she isnt a little girl anymore...

loves collecting pebbles and shiny things. has quite the collection.

godly stuff:

psychopomp & minor goddess of night blooming flowers and poisonous plants

speaks multiple languages (courtesy of hermes cthonios) and was kindly taught by asklepios the medical arts esp medicinal herbs

she grew up reading all sorts from hades' extensive library, is well versed in history, classical literature, and some mortal works too

has accompanied persephone a few times to the living world. the first time she was overwhelmed by the light and went straight back home lol. it took time but she enjoys microscopic quantities of sunlight. just like me frfr

great grandmother demeter infodumps about advances in agriculture and she nods along enthusiastically, unsure how to tell her shes significantly more interested in blights affecting the crops

the three of them have an interestic dynamic; enjoy herbal tea and swapping tea lol

persephone teaches her how to whisper to flowers to make them bloom and hades shows her how to bend shadows to her will

general ii

in essence she is a juxtaposition of a bunch of things; life and death, coolness and warmth, sweet and bitter.

shes pleasant to look at and wears a lil smile at all times (her mama taught her that), but has a death glare that can kill. duh.

shes also very (facially) expressive, somewhat compensating for her mutism. you can clearly read everything from her face

doesnt shy away from making her feelings known but is so chill it isnt that much anyway (did i word that right?)

prefers to stay in the sidelines and observe life (and death) around her. no im not projecting shush. she enjoys the peace and quiet of it all

every once in a while though she craves some change from the monotony, a little choas if you will, so she ventures to the living realm no prizes for guessing whos attention she catches hehe

miscellaneous lol:

has been to olympus a grand total of 1.5 times. there was a wedding and she went with persephone (twas also a kind of debut, yk how grandmothers want to show off their beloved grandkid lol)

idk the other time yet. maybe she ran an errand? anyway

she caught athenas eye (she managed to coax one of her owls), artemis spoke of nightshade and constellations, whereas hestia upon sensing how out of place she was softly gave her a rundown on the pantheon and its politics. shes a sweetheart i love her

still working on her 'work clothes' but its basically muted rose robes over a black turtleneck and trousers. something to this effect:

dont look too hard lmao i cant art :')

look shes guiding souls all day and tending to gardens after shifts she might as well be comfy.

ankle boots bc i love them. satchel for trinkets and stuff.

her fancier clothes reserved for occasions are still comfy & simple:

turtleneck stays bc i said so.

alternatively:

everyday jewlery is super simple; floral ring (gift from her mother) and bar earrings (engraved with smth i havent decided yet lol).

anyway more jazzy

mortal clothes!! are cool!! and super nice!! :D!!

her aesthetic of choice is somewhere between forest gremlin and chaotic academia.

ill get to colouring and real stuff eventually in this lifetime. maybe

hope yall enjoyed and goodnight (or good morning its 3am here lol)

apollo has found himself a new muse

she is less than jazzed. can you guess what pick up line he dropped?

[tojisun]

it’s me , 🫧 anon , i tried to resist from ranting but I’ve been holding it in since all the fics came out. Omg , i would not have kept calm like the reader. I get so mad for her . Like it’s all sunshine and rainbows on the outside for the fushiguros but idkkkk. Maybe they’re past relationship was but the foundation of their new relationship was built on the downfall of reader. They knowingly fucked her over. Not only was she destroyed emotionally but financially once her baby was involved , cause i do remember you saying she had to work two jobs. Who knows how tired she must have been cause being a single mom with two jobs isn’t easy. While Toji leaving was a wake up call for her in a way because he wasn’t fully 100% there, he isn’t going to be 100% for megumis mom since reader was there , Plus her son. uGH don’t get me started of megumis mom , i can’t. I cANT… i will. The woman knew what she was doing when she came back , knew the out come , and while she felt guilty about it , it doesn’t change the fact that she still did it. It would have been fine to idk at least see her son that she left behind but she took everything from reader. I can’t really overlook it , especially with how readers son was treated. She treated him differently enough for him to notice at such a young age. It wasn’t right for her to project on to a child for a problem she had caused and uGH ,Toji not doing enough to stop it. i didn’t wanna say it back then but like lowkey , she’s one of the main reasons he lost his son , Toji being the number reason he lost his own son but she’s right behind him. It makes me sad to think everytime he had to go see Toji he just wanted to go back home to reader. Like even megumi , at an older age did nothing, onLY HELPED HIM PACK WHILE FEELING BAD 😵‍💫I’ll stop here cause idk if i should keep going or not BUT, what I will say is that im glad reader found gojo cause he gave her 100% and more. The gojos will want to be with each other till the next life time while to fushiguros are stuck with the “what ifs” .

-🫧 anon

( did i go overboard omg )

no u didnt go overboard dont worry!!!!

im also genuinely so happy that u noticed all those details 🥺🫶🏼 (some of the things u mentioned were notes made in passing so im doing my happy little dancey dance at this hihi)

and YES TO EVERYTHING!!! when writing this, i tried being impartial and still make the other relationship (mamaguro n toji) healthy for the kids but also, FUCK!! THAT!!

bc the alternative ending involved a kid, my bitterness jumped out and im sorry for making the fushiguros so unlikeable :’((

and yes!!! i really loved the way that au shaped gojo n reader’s relationship!! the way gojo treasured aiko from the get-go, and the way aiko adored gojo because of how much gojo loves you?? THEN the engagement?? reader and gojo asking aiko’s blessing because their relationship is also about parenting aiko???? my god, i was crying so bad when i was writing that part

the alternative ending was everything the vindictive part of me liked!!! gojo and reader being happily ever after, and the fushiguros hurting??? good soup 😋

it mightve been projection too ngl but also im closing my eyes from that sidenote

[sailorhyunjinz]

What do you think first kiss with skz be like?

aAWH SOME FLUFF T-T OK BUT KEEP IN MIND- fluff is not my strongest pursuit hence why im not a fluff writer hahsah but HEY ITS CUTE!! and anon,,, im so sorry this took such time IM SO SO SORRY AAAAAAAAH- 

also this makes me wanna know my anons first kiss story, AAAH SPILL THEM 

warnings; none?? fluff,,, wow,, rare to say that LMAO- also gn!reader and also suggestiveee??

Bangchan

~gentleman~

will only kiss you if you are REALLY ready for it and if the two of you are dating

doesnt want to rush you into things (even if its just a kiss) because he doesnt know how comfortable you are and such

basically a sweetheart

i imagine its like a cute little date

 night where you guys are stargazing, lying on a blanket on a grassy hill with his arm as a pillow for your head

“chan, look! its a shooting star! make a wish” you giggle to which he smiles, looking at your pretty features that are lit up by the moonlight

“hmm,,, dear star, i wish that y/n would kiss me” he says, laughing directly after but soon being interupted as you attach your plushy lips against his

its probably the most romantic event in your life

him smiling into the kiss as your tongues danced around softly

when you pulled away you laughed, saying; “wishes do really come true, huh?”

poor baby is blushing, his ears red but thankfully for him its too dark for you to see

Minho

the “evil roommate that secretly has feelings for you”

“lee minho i swear im gonna rip your hair off if you touch my plants again”

minho got out of his room, looking at you standing in the living room and rearranging the plants on the windowsill 

“they are all scattered, it’s ugly” he says rudely

“dont call my children ugly” you spit back at him 

there was always a weird tension between you and minho. you were glad to have found a roommate that made a good friend eventhough he was a pain in the ass sometimes

minho liked you,,, and therefore he did everything the opposite of what he felt. if he wanted to compliment you on your outfit he would instead say that you looked “overdressed” or “too much” but you always rolled your eyes towards his snarky comments

you pecked your plants, giving them the love they needed and minho just stood frozen in the doorway, without thinking he spoke

“how come you never do that to me?”

silence

you sneered, placing down the plant you held and streched out your arms

“c’mere if you dare” you said jokingly, not expecting the boy you always thought was so devilish to run into your arms, lips touching and your eyes widening at the unexpected action

the two of you held each other, breathing shaky as wet tongues collided, the sun beaming upon your figures

“m-minho,,, it was a joke!” you laughed, slapping his arm playfully as you pulled away

“but to me it wasn’t” he remarked cockily, licking the inside of his cheek

Changbin

very much giving me like “we dont like each other but we have to work with each other”

like you two are co-workers, working in a boring office and you were assigned to put together this one report and,,, lets say Changbin wasnt your favorite in the office

there was nothing wrong with him,,, its just his vibe that was off putting but sigh,,, work is work

you started compiling information, sitting in a seperate room and drawing graphs on the whiteboard, projecting some other type of research onto the board

“do you think we will need to stay late?” he asks, ruffling his hair in frustration

you sigh and nod, this wasnt going to get done anytime soon.

dawn set on horizon and the others workers packed up their belonging one by one and left until there was only you and changbin left in the now quiet office

you sat next to him, yawning as you typed something as you felt him looking at you

you looked back with a questionable expression, confused when he uttered his words

“do you hate me, y/n?”

“i mean,,, you are a dick sometimes but i dont hate you, at least you do your work”

he shrugged his shoulders, loosening his necktie as he leaned back into the office chair

“a dick, huh? maybe i try to push you away so you wont catch the same feelings i have for you”

you snapped your head towards him. you couldnt lie, he was attractive and at this point you were desperate 

“kiss me then” you said simply causing the boy to immediately cup your cheeks, latching onto your lips as if he’d waited for this moment for forever

more tongue, wants you to feel him ;))

lets just say,,, he made it up to you

Hyunjin

i get this like,,, youthful vibe,,, like the two of you were childhood friends

and,,, eventually you catch feelings for him which you hate because,,, you dont want to ruin this friendship 

every time somebody mistook you for a couple the both of you would make retching noises, mocking each other

“you think my standards are that low?” hyunjin says pointing at you to which you raise your fist

“hwang hyunjin, you’re dead meat”

but,,, he was only in denial, it was his childhood friend afterall

probably happened at one of those night where your mom was working late and you invited hyunjin to keep you company, him bringing kkami as well. 

“dont fucking burn the pizza, hyunjin” you say, petting kkami until the little rascal ran away from your lap

“if you helped it wouldnt be burned” he replies as he comes out with two plates with the pizza burned on the edges

“but if they taste bad you can always taste my lips” he jokes and you look at him with a disgusted facial expression before laughing

“i bet they taste even worse then your mess of a pizza, i would like to see you try to even get me to peck you” you scoff and hyunjin rolls his eyes, sitting next to you on the sofa

“try it then” he taunts but is taken aback when you actually kiss him, your nose accidentally brushing against his as you purse your lips, hyunjin timidly using his tongue to test the waters

he wanted it so bad and he finally got it >:(( he could swear that he heard fireworks going off in his brain

a moment of silence appeared until hyunjin cockily uttered:

“so,,, did they taste better?”

Jisung

the “i met you at a party and made out with you drunk”

he stared at you the entire night, catching glances while you looked away and the music blared in the nightclub that was packed with people.

you ordered a drink at the bar, tapping your fingers on the oak surface where you rested your arms, suddenly somebody bumped into you

turning around you saw jisung and you sighed, thinking his behaviour was starting to get annoying

“oh its you again” you said loud for him to hear as he sat down next to you, having a annoying smirk plastered on his lips

“looks like you are having fun, let me guess,,, you’re trying to get over your ex” jisung says, leaning his elbow against the bar and you glared at him because it was true

you scoffed, avoiding his question and instead sipping on the sour drink you had in your hands, trying to forget everything

he was attractive which only pissed you off even more, as if you hadnt had enough pretentious assholes in your life

the glass slammed against the table as you put it down harshly, gazing into the boys dark brown eyes

“alright, deal. make me forget then since you think you know everything about me” you stated to which jisung raised his eyebrow

the palm of his hand was firmly placed on the bar as he leaned in to kiss you, feeling the bitter liquour hitting his tastebuds as your tongues crashed against each other

it felt,,, freeing. you swung your arms around his neck, wanting him closer to your body

by the way he was kissing you, you could tell that he was there for the same reason as you. a sloppy and heated kiss to fill your thoughts with something other than your ex

safe to say that the kiss progressed ;))))

Felix

aaah cutie boyfriend that is just too shy to even give you a kiss like 3 months into the relationship (OK DONT ATTACK ME NOW, TAKE YOUR TIME, NO RUSH YOU GUYS)

he is shy with pretty much everything, it was only recently he could hold your hand without his heart jumping out of his chest.

it was a simple date night! takeout and games at his place

you layed your head in his lap as you watched him finish up the game that you had given up on a long time ago

he shifted awkwardly in his seat, not used to being so close to such a pretty person before

“ah- fuck! i lost again,,,” he says in defeat, his head rolling backwards before a frustrated sigh escaped his lips

“you did well felix! look how far you got!” you say, pointing towards the score on the screen but not getting his attention. 

you sat up, looking at him for a moment as his eyelashes lightly draped over his closed eyes, cheeks speckled with freckles

you couldnt help yourself, he looked so angelic despite being defeated and so you leaned in, lacing your fingers with his and softly placing your lips against his

he opened his eyes in panic before being swallowed by the fluffy feeling of having your lips to himself, he giggled before stroking your cheek as he tilted his head, almost setting a rhythm to the sweet kiss

felix started laughing shyly, cheeks tinged with red as he hid his face with a pillow

“but you won my kiss!” you said through a smile causing felix to blush even more

Seungmin

its like,,, maybe,,, your third or fourth date??

this one is more chill than the previous ones that were at like some fancy restaurang because hello dandy puppy boy wants class

but this one was like a stroll down the night streets and eating ice cream in the middle of the summer

both of you were casually dressed, holding hands as butterflies bubbled in your stomach from the contact

his hand is all warm and it engulfs yours >:(

you look at all the pretty sights of the night, eventually climbing up to some like high point and looking down at all the lights that blinked

after a good 1 1/2 hours of walking your legs were starting to ache and so you both sat down on the swings of a desolate playground, swinging gently with your legs dangling

“i dont understand how you’re able to,,, even be friends with me,,, or whatever we are,,”

seungmin hummed, looking up into the night sky

“i promise y/n, i will be your,,, friend but,,,”

you looked at him as he said “but”, imagining the worst 

“i dont wanna be friends, i wanna be more than a friend to you”

his eyes twinkled as he stood up and stood infront of you, grabbing your hand

you slowly looked up at him, his figure standing in the way of the moon as the two of you shared a long gaze, his eyes as sweet as honey, dripping with pure adoration

you pulled him closer by the hand and slowly he inched to your lips, the distance between you minimizing as his face tilted to the right, a delicate and sugary kiss landing on your tastebuds from the ice cream from earlier.

your heart skipped a beat, the slightest sound of lips smacking

“i think i love you y/n” he whispered close to your lips after pulling away. 

Jeongin

like,,, uni buddies! 

both being med students meant late study night, usually in school 

there’s papers and diagrams laid out all over the tables and floors along with a bunch of energy drink cans, some scribbles on the whiteboard 

the two of you were friends and met in uni and everyone had always nagged at you for not going after him since he was everything someone ever wanted

you always said that you were friends and that you couldnt imagine being in a relationship with jeongin

but studying with him alone into the deep night felt different, many times you couldnt concentrate when he looked so cute sitting right beside you

being close friends, there was nothing weird about hugging or leaning against each other and so you leaned against his shoulder and yawned as the cozy boy was rewriting some notes. 

“one hour left y/n and then- then we can go hoooome!”

you giggled as you looked at him and he diverted his attention from his papers to you, his lips only mere inches from yours

you didnt know what the fuck you were doing and neither did jeongin, it was late and the both of you were tired from studying for finals

and so your lips drew closer until they clashed, feeling a tension that you’ve never felt with him before

he’s definitely a shy,,, kisser?? not too much tongue since he doesnt know how LMAO so its like soft >:((

didnt know what to do when he pulled away, looking around the room or covering his blushing face with his hands but when you hug him he hugs you back

maybe even coming to terms that he does have feeling for you,,, and so do you~ 

[mandareeboo]

ok now im curious what your most petty thing is (regarding the dp post)

Oooh boy, here we go! Buckle up fuckers this is gonna be a longer one.

My senior year of high school, I took a creative writing class. Partially because I needed to fill the slot, mostly because I wanted to improve my writing (spoiler: I did not). Now, my high school was a three floor building- first was mostly gym, second was general, and the third was senior lockers and art classes. I spent a good chunk of my schedule senior year on the second and third floor, going between an art class to my earth science (I took that one entirely as filler, but also bc I like science) to my locker and so on.

Creative writing? Creative writing was in the fucking basement. Go to the first floor, go to a corner generally used for health and development classes, to another corner, follow a ramp and some stairs, and boom there it is kind of basement. (Side note but this teacher was REALLY into attendance and would get you in trouble if you were late which was really annoying since basically no other class was in that part of the building).

My creative writing teacher wasn't bad, per se. I've had worse teachers. I had an algebra teacher who delighted in making freshman girls cry and mocking them for it. I had a journalism teacher who would use her class time reporting how Hilary was secretly ill during the election. I had a history teacher say trans people weren't real to an openly gender nonconforming student (I didn't know them well enough to ask for specifics on their alignment, but they were using they/them at that point) and set up assignments just to mock students on the take they were told to make. It was more that she was uncreative and took it out on the kids doing creative writing.

She gave us two books to read. Basically “how I write” by published authors. I don’t remember the first one well enough and I donated it ages ago, but the second was Stephen King’s “On Writing”. It was 3/4′s personal stories about his life and 1/4′s “also write a bit every day”.  I mostly remember the first author bc she had those fake dreadlocks white people do when they destroy their hair and she gleefully told a story about making her son have a meltdown at a party or wedding or something bc he got overwhelmed and she wanted him to learn that “sometimes you don’t get what you want”. So. You know. Not much there.

She also instructed us to write in a journal every day, which she would check every few months or so. It had to be at least half a page. She would leave little comments in every one else’s journals when she checked them, but not mine- I realized pretty quickly she was a bit uncomfortable with LGBT+ content, so I made it my mission to make every journal drabble as gay as possible bc I was bored and she couldn’t mark them WRONG when she just stated we needed to write.

But it doesn’t end there! Through the entire class, we got exactly five writing projects. Stories that follow very specific guidelines that we would then read in front of the class, group proofread, and then have the teacher give final grades for. These things were approximately like a thousand words a piece, and I was writing out my 10,000 word “It Starts off Small” story in class when I got bored, so it wasn’t difficult. 

Our first project was a character going through a difficult decision. Or... something? I honestly forget the criteria. Anyway, I was HYPE. I’d had this idea for a long time now a human choosing between peaceful death or reincarnation, and this gave me the push to write it! I had a whole thing planned with death being a deer and reincarnation being a wolpertinger (bc reincarnation leads to many possibilities, ed boy, so a Frankenstein bunny made sense to me). Anyway I poured my heart and soul into this bastard and, bright eyed and bushy tailed, handed it in. My classmates all thought it was pretty good. Not to toot m’own horn, but there was some pretty bad ones going in, so I thought I’d get a solid B or something.

I got a D. I guess the struggle was too metaphorical, or it didn’t perfectly fit her criteria. I was devastated. Then I was mad. Bc I was a bored senior who thought they’d made something pretty decent for this completely optional class and her refusal to see that really hurt me at sixteen (I was always a year younger than my other classmates, so despite being a senior I didn’t turn eighteen until almost a year after graduation)

Well, fuck it, I decided. I’m going to parody the shit out of this class.

Our next project was a fantasy story. I was bitter and grumpy. The other fantasy stories read aloud were stuff like “yeah this dude fought a wizard and got a girl, then they went home and banged” (this was not hyperbole, he would’ve written and read the smut if allowed, I knew him personally) and “this girl that NO ONE UNDERSTOOD was called CRAZY but this S@!$ cheerleader who Stole Her Boyfriend so she killed them all” (fun fact: the girl who wrote that was my age and a sort of half-friend from middle school. She was a yaoi fangirl who didn’t mind lesbians as long as they, you know, didn’t FLIRT with her or something.) 

So I get up there. It’s the last day of presentations. And I present with a polite cheer. My story is about two magical shepherd type figures who are called Sister Brighten and Brother Dick as they chase down a werewolf who was drunk off his ass and accidentally bit someone else. They then revealed they were basically supernatural designated drivers for the whole town. I made Brighten mention that Dick’s name wasn’t even Richard. I titled it “His Favorite Brand is Grayhound”. It fit every single criteria. I got an A. I could tell she didn’t want to, because there was no comments or anything like everyone else’s, but she had to follow her own criteria.

Our third was a conjoined effort thing so I didn’t pull any fuckery there, but the fourth one was about common myths and spinning them into real or fake. One girl did the hook-handed door handle thing and the boyfriend ended up above his truck hanging (somehow???). I think someone did the age-old adage of a haunted wedding dress? I kind of read through those presentations. 

Now, I’m salty-salty at this point. I wasn’t expecting His Favorite Brand is Grayhound to get me a good grade. I half-assed a lot of it. I am in full Not Happy Teenager at this point. I grab a daddy long leg and settle in.

My fourth story of the year is “Paperskin.”

Paperskin is about a boy named Billy with the thinnest skin membrane ever. Just full on body horror. You could see his teeth behind his lips. Billy gets bored one day and wanders out of his house, tries to kick a soccer ball, and breaks a leg. As he’s laying in the grass a daddy long leg bites him- and his skin is so flimsy the fangs sink in and he dies. I’m actually still pretty proud of Paperskin. It’s a horrifying, Edgar Allen Poe of a monstrosity, but it made people squirm, which was the point. The teacher is clearly a bit unnerved at this point, but she gives me another A. 

I wrote a more “normal” story after that of a contentious objector forced to house kids going to see if any confirmed soldier deaths were any of their parents as my final one and I could feel her spite as she gave me a B.

So, yeah. That’s the story of when I tormented my creative writing teacher with The Gays and my weird ass sense of humor after she called one of my best works at that age a piece of shit.

 Here’s a google drive of these bad boys, because yes I do still have these things. I turned these fuckers in for grades, people.

[shwazzberryswriting]

Twisted, Act 2

Once they made it to her place, she thanked Haechan profusely when he offered to carry the bulky items into her house. After giving him the house WiFi password, she left Haechan in the kitchen to eat as she showered. She hadn’t showered after the lunch rush since she’d gone to Haechan’s place. And she only made herself dirtier by having sex with him before making a sweaty run to Costco. Her shower was long overdue, to say the least.

Under the warm jets of water, soaping up her body, Lawan was overcome with the fear she’d set aside. Would she become a young mother? Would her own mom hold that against her?

It had been her mom who had asked her if she wanted to get an IUD implant before she left for college. Her mom was a teen mom at 17, unable to go to college. She had to work full time with 2 jobs (sometimes 3) to raise Lawan. It was especially challenging since Lawan’s father chose to be out of the picture.

Annoyed, and suspicious that her mom was projecting, Lawan had declined to get the IUD. She had been convinced she was responsible enough to not have to worry about accidents. Stressed about whether or not Plan B would work, she wondered if there was something out there wanting to teach her a hard lesson about not learning from her mother’s mistakes.

There was a knock on the bathroom door that threw her off her train of thought, and she jumped away from the showerhead as she realized that the water was freezing cold. Her fingers shook as she shut the water off.

“Lawan?” Haechan’s voice was a little muffled. “You OK? The food’s cold now. I put your ice cream in the freezer.”

“Uh, yeah,” she said, stepping out of the shower and wrapping her body up with her white bath towel. She shivered, and opened the door after grabbing a second towel to throw over her head and shoulders. “Busy thinking, that’s all.”

His gaze down at her was soft, his eyes half closed, and she felt her core grow warm as he licked his lips. He closed his mouth, but her eyes were fixed on his Adam’s apple move as he gave a hard swallow. Her fingers gripped onto her towel as she stared at his beauty marks on his neck, stopping herself from reaching out to touch them.

“We shouldn’t,” she said as she placed a hand on his chest, having felt his body shift close to her. He bowed his head down, resting a hand onto the door frame.

“You’re right,” he said, lifting his head up. He cleared his throat. “How do you feel?”

“Hungry,” she replied before walking past him to head back to her bedroom.

She turned around, and felt her chest grow hot as she saw him slumped up against the wall. He looked just as wounded as she felt. His head was bowed down against his chest with his shoulders hunched over. It took her a split second to change her mind as she returned to him, and brushed the back of her fingers against the palm of his left hand.

Haechan opened his eyes, and stood up straight. Just like when they were seated beside each other at Misfit, as their eyes locked Haechan pushed forward and Lawan threw her hands up to grab his neck. He licked his lips as she breathed through her mouth, anticipating when he’d kiss her.

His hand grasped onto the towels and tugged them off her, tossing them to the floor. He placed one hand on her hip as they kissed, his mouth hot as his lips fought to claim hers. One hand grasped onto her ass cheek, kneading and pinching her as he pulled her body up against his, sending heat into her back and down to her groin.

She let go of his neck, and rested her hands onto his shoulders as she slowly took a step backwards. He picked up on what she wanted, and broke their kiss before bending down. He told her to jump once he grasped onto the back of her thighs. With her legs hooked around his waist and her arms wrapped around his neck, Lawan kissed Haechan as he carried her to her bedroom.

“Where’s your bed?” he asked in a stage whisper as she planted kisses onto his lips and cheeks.

“To the left,” she replied between kisses as she heard him kick the door shut behind them.

She licked his neck and began sucking on it as she felt him set her down on her bed, his skin tasting salty and musky. He needed a shower, but his slightly bitter musk fogged up her mind. He yelped, and collapsed on top of her, his body between her legs. She groaned, feeling his body weigh down on her.

“You didn’t ask to mark me,” he breathed against her lips as he moved quickly to hold her wrists down over her head. “Hypocrite.”

“I’m sorry,” she said with a frown. She shivered as he dove down and softly kissed the right side of her neck. “Let me make it up to you.”

She lifted her head up to kiss him, wriggling her wrists out of his hold. As their lips met, she moved her hands down to his chest, and pushed him to lie down on his back. Once she was lying on top of his body, her hands moved down to undo his jeans. Impatiently, she helped him take his skinny jeans and boxer briefs off before tossing them to the floor. He laid back down as she stroked a hand up and down on his shaft.

She moved to sit on her knees between his legs. His cock hardened as she continued to pump it, the heat radiating from his cock warming up her hand. She brushed the mushroomed head against her hardened nipples a few times as she bent over his crotch, wanting to give him a show. His heavy breathing and inability to speak indicated that he was enjoying it.

The heat of his cock sent shivers up her back whenever it hit her sensitive nipples. She looked up to see Haechan’s head lifted up as his eyes were focused on her playing with his cock. Continuing to pump him, she moved down to use her mouth to pleasure him.

“Fuck, baby,” he moaned out as she licked along the bottom length of his shaft, going down to plant soft wet kisses onto his ballsack. His fingers tangled into her hair. “Holy fuck, your lips are the best.”

She planted wet kisses up and down the length of his shaft. A strong surge of pride hit her chest as he moaned out her name. He praised her lips once more as she kissed the tip of his cock. She licked it before putting it into her mouth.

Taking her time with sucking on more of his length, she hollowed her cheeks to intensify the suction. Her fingers stroked him where her mouth could not, moving up and down his veiny length. She allowed herself some time to find a good breathing rhythm through her nose before picking up pace. The salty and earthy taste of Haechan filled up her mouth and throat.

“Fuck, keep doing that, babe,” he panted out after a weak moan. She began bobbing back and forth with a faster pace, her saliva dribbling down the length of his cock. With her fingers, she used it to help rub the bottom of his shaft and his balls. “You’re so hot with my cock in your mouth. Don’t stop. Don’t stop.”

He groaned, his fingers grasping onto her hair as he came. She was surprised as his seed filled her mouth. She shut her eyes and swallowed as best as she could, his salty come filling her senses. She sat up and grabbed tissues from the nightstand to wipe her mouth before cleaning him up.

“That was fucking great,” Haechan said breathlessly when she laid down beside him. He pulled her body close to him. His body was hot, and she was feeling much warmer. His thumb traced over her bottom lip. “You give amazing head.”

“Thanks,” she said, feeling heat hit her cheeks. She rested her head against his chest, blood riding up her shoulders and neck into her head. His words made her dizzy.

“You’ve never been complimented on the blowjobs you give?” he asked. He lifted her chin to look up at him with his hand.

“No,” she said with a laugh. “You’re the most vocal person I’ve slept with. It’s a good thing.” She had to pacify him as his smile disappeared. She kissed his neck while caressing his chest. Her lips touched the beauty mark near his Adam’s apple. “It’s hot when you tell me that you like what I’m doing.”

“You didn’t have to blow me,” he said, stroking her arm as she rested her head onto his chest again. “It’s my fault you had to get the Pill.”

“You are full of luck, aren’t you?” she asked, running her hand down his chest to his stomach. He made her feel calm, and she wanted to caress his stomach for as long as it would take for her to fall asleep. “I should kick your ass, but instead you’re in bed with me.”

“It’s because I brought in all the heavy shit,” he said, making her give a lazy chuckle. He caressed her hips and ass. It felt nice to run her hands under his shirt as they embraced, but she wondered what it meant for them to be in bed together again. That first time earlier in his bed had been an impulsive move. It was supposed to have been a one time thing.

*Day 6*

Her roommates had gotten drunk while doing a Twin Peaks weekend marathon. Intentional or not, Lawan got the hint that her pregnancy limbo was the last thing any of them wanted. Her potential life-altering situation was too close for comfort. A dumbass mistake like a broken condom could happen to any of them. It wasn’t even 10:00 PM yet, and she was alone in the kitchen, scooping ice cream into her coffee mug. Her phone buzzed against the island counter when she received a text.

Donghyuck: do u want company bros r gettin drunk n im not feelin it

Lawan: 😂 my roomies are all drunk too, passed out in their rooms, come over… if u want

It’d taken him less than 15 minutes to knock on her door. She’d just finished washing the dishes when she let him in. Walking to her room together, she felt just as nervous to be with him as the first time they had sex together. That had been the last time they had last seen each other.

After their roller coaster day together, she finally unblocked Haechan’s number. They’d exchanged numbers their freshman year when they had a class project together, but it hadn’t taken long for Lawan to block him when he’d pretended to cry to get out of doing a project. With the unblock, Haechan had been a good friend. He texted her every morning to ask her how she felt.

When they were alone in her room, they nervously walked around each other as he seemed unsure if he wanted to sit on the floor or on her desk chair. She kept wondering if it was wise to have closed the door, and couldn’t decide if she wanted to sit on her bed or not. As she moved to her right, he moved in the same direction and their hands touched. She laughed into his chest as he wrapped his arms around her body, holding her in a firm embrace.

Prior to their hookup she would have shoved him away, annoyed that he was so quick to show skinship. But the only person she wanted to hold her was Haechan. She didn’t want to think of their connection as a stupid mistake, because the embrace meant that they were close enough that they didn’t have to ask for hugs. Haechan could wake her up with his warm hugs and she’d be happy rather than annoyed.

“How do you feel?” he asked her.

“Scared,” she admitted. Due to the increased stress, she slept during her free time. Sleep was the only way she could get her mind to stop thinking about possibly being pregnant.

“Have you talked to anyone about this?”

Lawan told her roommates about Haechan and the broken condom, but she didn’t expect them to give her company. Given that one of them was preparing for med school and the other wasn’t comfortable with talks of parenthood, Lawan didn’t hold it against her roommates for not talking to her about it. Truth be told, she didn’t want to talk to them about it either. It was just as uncomfortable for her to try to think about it.

“My cousin.” She shut her eyes and focused on how soft his black shirt felt against her cheek, and how he smelt like the sweet Hawaiian bread rolls she would eat as her after school snack when she was a kid. She wanted to sink into his embrace. “We exchanged emails yesterday.”

“The one who lives in Amsterdam?”

“She’s the only one who can keep a secret.” He gave a chuckle. She felt her face grow warm. She didn’t mean to make him laugh, but it lifted her spirits. “She told me she had a similar experience a couple years ago. Have you talked to anyone about this?”

“No, do you want me to?”

“No,” she said, looking up at him. “Thanks for keeping things discreet.”

He released her, and sat down on her bed as she grabbed her grey laptop from her desk. She joined him and they watched a movie together. He suggested a light romantic comedy, and though she was too stressed to take anything in, she had a good time hearing Haechan laugh next to her. She took out a bag of candy from her night stand.

“Gummy worms?” he asked, his eyes widening. The green bag crinkled loudly as he ripped it open.

“You were expecting condoms?” she replied. She raised an eyebrow.

“Thanks for the candy,” he said, grinning sheepishly as he placed the bag between them on the mattress. She laughed as they got more comfortable in bed.

“Thanks for checking up on me,” she said, resting her head onto his shoulder.

He remained quiet as he rested his head against her. Keeping his mouth shut was a favor to her, she suspected.

*Day 15*

It was another night in which members of the NCT fraternity were destroying the kitchen, but Haechan wasn’t involved in the activities. He had locked himself with Lawan in his room. They were watching a historical drama, one about rich royals betraying each other.

His computer screen was much larger than her small laptop, so it was easier to watch movies in his room than hers. It was a small sacrifice having to put up with his loud roommates. They were only able to fit in nights together when neither of them were working or loaded with homework anyway.

But they had managed to hang out three nights in a row, and she had to admit to herself that she was enjoying Haechan’s company more and more. As much as he seemed to take joy in annoying her, he’d begun to find new ways to make her laugh in reaction to his actions. Such as their night watching a movie in his room; she rested her back against the headboard of his bed, and she laughed as he dipped down to pepper kisses onto her neck.

“Donghyuck, stop,” she said through her chortles, pushing his chest as she leaned away.

“I dropped some popcorn,” he said, sitting up straight. He grabbed her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. “Can you start calling me Haechan? Donghyuck is too formal.”

“Haechan?” she said lightly. His face flushed as he tilted his head in towards hers. She’d called him Donghyuck for years to annoy him, but she didn’t mind calling him by his nickname. The bashful half grin on his face was cute. “Haechan.”

He kissed her. She pushed his tongue out of her mouth as she tasted salt and caramel from him. Lying down on her back, she wrapped an arm around his neck as they continued to kiss. They were becoming familiar with each other’s bodies, and she enjoyed caressing his earlobe with her fingers. He hummed gently against her lips, and she hummed back, the vibrations from his voice reverberating into her chest.

“I have to get up early for my class at 8:30 tomorrow,” she said when they broke their kiss. She’d repeated the sentence in her head all day to prepare for a moment like this.

“Let me take you home,” he replied, his hold loosening. She wrapped both arms around his neck and kissed him.

“Five more minutes,” she said against his lips. “You’re such a good kisser.”

He pulled away from her lips.

“What else do you like about me?” he asked breathlessly.

“Brat,” she said with a laugh, pushing against his chest. He shut his eyes as she caressed his earlobe again, a smile on his lips. “I just want to kiss you a little more.”

They continued, his lips hot and his mouth tasting sweet, but she stopped as she felt his hand reach under her shirt to grab her lower back. His hand on her bare skin sent heat up her body, loosening her inhibitions. Her hips bucked up against him, and they groaned against each other’s lips as the friction of his half hard cock hit her warming core. He let go of her and sat up when their eyes locked. She stood up off the bed, turning away from him.

“Thanks for taking me home,” she said softly, picking up her purse from his gaming chair, “Haechan.”

She took his hand as they stood at the foot of his bed. The tension in her shoulders loosened as he lifted her hand up and kissed it before leading her out of his room.

--

*Day 22*

She was on the bathroom floor, curled up in the fetal position. Haechan’s body warmed her as he spooned her, his arms wrapping her up. She sobbed loudly and hiccupped, her hands holding her legs against her chest. Her period was four days late, and she didn’t know if she should take a pregnancy test.

It wasn’t like she was 17 and barely out of high school, but Lawan was still afraid that she would have to alter her life. Being in college with a part-time job was hard enough, she wasn’t prepared to have an entire human being depend on her. She felt sick even letting her fears form into half thoughts, but the questions came against her will.

What would she do if she were pregnant? Would she have to talk to her mom and reveal all the dumb shit she’d been doing at college? Could she do what her mom did and raise a child as a young mother? Or would she get an abortion?

“I’m so sorry, babe,” Haechan said softly as he gave her a gentle squeeze. “I’ve got you. I’m here.”

She sniffled, and nodded her head gently, unable to speak. She was scared, and didn’t want to feel like she was relying on Haechan. But he was the only person who knew and cared about her predicament. She hadn’t expected him to show up when she sent him a stream of texts listing off every negative thought going through her mind.

What if she had to drop out of school and work? She only worked 25 hours at Misfit, how would she be able to care for a baby on that salary? How long could she go without talking to her mom before her mom began to suspect something was going on? What would she say to her mom if her period didn’t arrive soon?

The texts had been a way to vent out her stress, but she’d fallen to her bathroom floor and cried for what felt like hours. There wasn’t a moment in which she realized that Haechan was lying on the floor with her, but when she heard him hum a, “Shh,” into her ear she sobbed out his name. And so they were curled up together on her bathroom floor for as long as it took for her to fall asleep.

--

To Act 3

[peachcitt]

I've seen a lot of people saying that rot was BAD, what is your opinion?

OH IM SO GLAD YOU ASKED

like most people (im sure) after finishing rise of the titans, after wiping up my tears i went to the rot tag to see maybe some gifs or something. you know, make myself cry a little more. instead, i found a bunch of people saying how much they hated the ending, how it was as terrible as some of the worst big finale bombs (endgame, game of thrones, etc) and uh. im not saying the ending is perfect, but it is DEFINITELY not as disastrous as what people are making it out to be, in my opinion. i thoroughly enjoyed the movie, actually, and i thought it was an effective way to end the tales of arcadia.

warning: rise of the titans spoilers, as well as general tales of arcadia spoilers

were there some things i didn't like? yeah!

the major things i didn't like align with a lot of what i see other people saying:

the weird mpreg plotline with steve. it just felt so strange and out of place, and it was used as a tactic to remove eli and steve from the major action, which i don't like.

and the 'ninth configuration' thing that, once again, excluded eli and steve. i didn't see a reason why they shouldn't have been there, seeing as they have contributed to trollhunting since nearly the start of all of the tales of arcadia. multiples of three are clean and smooth, i get it, but at the expense of two characters that were so lovingly developed in trollhunters and 3below?? yikes

with that being said, though, i don't agree with what a lot of people are saying about the time travel at the end. obviously, they bring up some good points - by changing the timeline so drastically, there's no way for jim to ensure that they'll be able to succeed or if the arcane order will even act in the same way. it's a big 'if' and it is worth thinking about

but people have been saying that the ending is out of jim's character and negates his arc, and i have to say. that's not true.

if you've been following my blog since july 1st, you'll know that ive spent the past twenty one days rewatching the entire tales of arcadia series at a steady pace, and within that time, i've paid a whole lot of attention to jim's arc as a character and how the finale of trollhunters left me feeling as if something just wasn't clicking right. his arc wasn't finished.

because all throughout trollhunters, jim is constantly having to prove his worth - and most of the time, the way he's proving his worth is by sacrificing himself. he takes all the blame when anything goes wrong, and on some level, jim never truly learns the lesson from season one of trollhunters that he's enough as a hero because he has his friends to back him up. like, yeah, he relies on them a bit more after that, but in the end, he still stands in the bathroom alone, separated from all his allies, and shoulders the burden of turning into a troll alone. and he leaves arcadia, the city he was fighting so hard to protect, and he leaves his best friend, the one that has been with him since the beginning.

then we get wizards, where jim lets himself be corrupted to save his friends. and then, because of that sacrifice, he ends up hurting all of them. i believe this fact - that he willingly corrupted himself, separated himself from his allies, and ended up hurting the people he loved - shook jim's foundation as a hero, which is why he can't believe he's the trollhunter without the amulet. the amulet was the physical manifestation of what it meant to be a hero to him, but it was destroyed when he was corrupted - it was destroyed when he hurt his friends.

that's how we see him in rise of the titans; he's still struggling with his identity as a hero because he doesn't have the amulet or the unshakable foundation he previously had of his heroism. literally everyone is looking for him to be the leader and make the huge, world-saving-or-destroying decisions, but he can't shoulder that huge burden knowing he could hurt everyone. and then, just to add fuel to the fire, it's his plan that causes people to die or be permanently separated from the group. and he can't even get the sword out of the stone! why? because he himself doesn't see himself as worthy - how can you think of yourself as worthy when you just got two of your allies killed and two more gone, presumably for forever?

but this is the moment it finally clicks for jim. he looks around at his allies, and he sees them reflected in the amulet. he's not alone, he doesn't have to be worthy just by himself, he has an entire group of people who have fought by his side time and time again that, even despite all the mistakes and missteps he's made, are still by his side.

and what makes the amulet work, in the final fight, is his firm determination to see this fight through, no matter if he has the armor or not. he's terrified, he's probably going to die - but it's that bravery despite the fear that makes him a hero, a trollhunter, amulet or not. and he knows that now - he's had to face it before, in the unbecoming episode, but it's different now. in the unbecoming episode, he was truly alone when he decided to face the fight. and he's alone here in rise of the titans - but not for long! because almost immediately after jim comes to terms with his place as a hero again, toby comes along, and he doesn't finish this fight alone!! he finishes this fight with another trollhunter, who doesn't have an amulet!!

jim deciding to rewind time to back before the events of trollhunters is a bold choice, but it tracks with a theme in wizards - merlin told douxie that what set him apart as a master wizard was his belief that every life was valuable and worthy of being saved. this theme is repeated in the new amulet in rise of the guardians; it's for the glory of all, not just for one person.

and jim deciding to have toby become the trollhunter finally marks the completion of jim's arc. instead of shouldering the burden alone, which is inevitably what would've happened if jim had rewound time, kept all of his memories, and accepted the amulet again, jim is choosing to accept allies into his life sooner. instead of being the trollhunter, jim is letting himself be a trollhunter, alongside all the other trollhunters.

of course, there's some things in this alternate timeline i don't like; mainly that no one stepped in to stop steve from bullying eli. that, to me, was the most out of character, and i can only assume jim didn't step in because he's leaving room for that fight to be toby's; competing against steve was a large jumpstart to jim feeling like he could be strong enough to bear the mantle, and maybe jim was just trying leave it up to toby to establish that on his own. still, i didn't like it.

and, of course, there are people lamenting the fact that none of the heroes of arcadia know each other or that they might not have the same relationships, but i immediately thought of the time loop episode in 3below. in that episode, the trollhunters team and the gang from 3below meet and become friends and ultimately lose the memory of that friendship from that day. however, in that episode, blinky says that true friendship would last against the test of time; if they were meant to be together, then they would be. and guess what? even though none of them remember that happening, they all still became friends. it was meant to be.

i think a lot of anxieties about the changed timeline are because people loved the events of trollhunters so much that they a) don't want to see anything changed and/or b) are trying to project the events of trollhunters onto the new timeline and are upset when they don't fit. toby won't be the same kind of hero that jim is, though - he never has been. inevitably, the story will be different, and that's scary. that was the risk jim took, though, and jim has always trusted in toby, so why shouldn't we?

to me, tales of arcadia has never been about clean endings that make you feel entirely good. they've always left me with a tang of bitter along with the sweet, and i think that's the point. tales of arcadia has always battled with hard questions and difficult endings, and i don't see rise of the titans being any different from that.

like i said before, i don't think rise of the titans is perfect. but you can hate it as much as you want; i still really think it did a good job with the story it was trying to tell. i mean, ending with the idea that all lives are important and worth saving, no matter the risk? that heroism inherently means being part of a collective that you trust and believe in? that through time and space, you will always be able to find and connect with the people you love? that's powerful.

im climbing off my soapbox now, but basically tl;dr: rise of the titans was a good finale, despite it's imperfections, and i think that's all i can ask for.

also if you don't like toby as the trollhunter just because you don't like him breaking out of the 'funny sidekick' archetype you can die by my blade

[oscar-lettjohanssonloveme]

Purple Roses pt. 2 (Miss Venable x reader)

hiya..its 4 am in germany and im really tired :3 but here we go, Mina is damn soft in this fanfic..i hope its okay sksks..here is the first pt.:

https://littlejeaniehugsbumblebees.tumblr.com/post/640902350735818752/purple-roses-ms-venable-x-reader

summary: Mina meets ur parents and u have ur coming out..ouhh and she wants to ask u smt

warnings: nothing its super duper fluff i guess :D

tagglist: @d14n4ol

google translate sksksk

"Earth to Mina ..", you grumbled and reached out your finger to tap her cheek gently.

"What?"

Your girlfriend looked away from her newspaper with a frown to look down at you, who was lying in her lap.

You had to grin as she stared down at you in confusion as the glasses slid down a few millimeters on the bridge of her nose.

"I asked you something.."

"And what did you ask?"

"So ..", you started after your fingers had moved to her glasses and you had pushed them up again.

"Imagine you had to decide: Either you are the only mortal human among immortal humans or you are the only human who is undying among all mortal humans.. What do you choose?"

"Is that a test?"

"A test for what?"

"For finding out if I'm a psychopath or something like that?" She asked, still staring down at you, frowning.

"No ..." you shook your head. "I just saw it earlier on instagram and was just thinking about it .."

She looked at you thoughtfully for a few seconds.

"I would probably want to be the immortal human among mortals .."

"For real?" You shouted, tilting your head.

"Then you should see all your friends die .."

Mina raised an eyebrow.

"Which friends?"

"Oh wow .." you rolled your eyes.

"So, am I a psychopath now?" She smiled and you could see her white teeth.

"No .." you mumbled as you started to play with her purple blouse.

"I would probably have taken that too .. but just because it would have been weird to be the only person who would have to die at some point .."

Mina let out a low snort.

"Imagine that, a graveyard for one person ..".

"Yes! .." you exclaimed cockily. "I would probably be exhibited in a museum as the only human corpse. And I would get a coffin made of gold and people would come from all over the world just to see me dead .."

"Or some crazy scientist would use your dead body for their projects .."

"Ew .." you made and grimaced. "That wouldn't be that great ..".

"Better to be immortal, then ..", Mina said with a grin before leaning forward to put her newspaper on the table.

"Now I have a question for you, Y / N .."

"Oh yeah?" You looked confused into her brown eyes and she hummed in agreement as her fingers started to comb through your hair.

"Okay, imagine a bitter old woman comes up to you and asked you, if you want to marry her, what would you answer?"

"I would say no, of course ..." you said, tilting your head to one side.

"First of all, I don't find old, bitter women really attractive and, secondly, why should I marry an old, bitter woman when I can just have the most beautiful woman in the world?"

Mina laughed softly before tapping the tip of your nose with her index finger.

"You know what I'm getting at ..".

"What I know is that you could then leave your show-off house and then finally move into my horror apartment ..", you grinned cheekily at her and she just rolled her eyes.

"You know, I've been thinking, Y / N .." she continued, suddenly sounding serious. "We've been a couple for almost a year now and the only person who knows about it is your aunt and some of your friends .."

"Should I start tagging you on my pictures now?" You laughed.

"You're the one who doesn't like all the love stuff in public and that's not supposed to be a reproach .. I-"

"I want to get to know your parents ..", she interrupted you and looked at you carefully.

You met her gaze for a few seconds before you swallowed.

"My parents?" You repeated quietly.

"Your parents."

"Uhm..okay..that's unexpected .." you muttered as you rose from her lap to sit up.

"So my parents are nice people, but you know, that they dont now that I am ... you know-"

"That you are attracted to old, bitter women?"

"Oh shut up Mina .." you hissed and slapped her gently on the upper arm.

"If you say that again, break your stupid stick and throw it in the fireplace ..".

"Ouhh now I'm scared .." Mina teased, grinning, but you just shook your head.

For a moment there was silence between the two of you and Mina was finally the one who interrupted them.

"I don't want to force you to do it and if you say, you don't want to do that, then that's okay .. I don't want to drive a wedge between you and your parents either .." she said and put her hand on yours. Your gaze landed on her hand, ran down her arm to finally meet her face.

"Maybe it's a good idea .." you muttered and she smiled gently.

"At some point I have to tell them anyway .."

-----------------------------

"Hello beautiful woman .." you greet your girlfriend who entered your shop. Like she did every Tuesday night after work ... It was one of your favorite traditions in your relationship.

"How can I help you today?", You smiled brightly at her as she leaned against your counter

"Well Miss Y / L / N, my wonderful girlfriend and I will be with her parents for dinner for the first time tomorrow evening .. You know, her parents don't know that she is a lesbian ...", Mina explained seriously and brought you to grin.

"That sounds interesting .."

"That's it! We're both just pretty nervous and I thought it would be a good idea to bring flowers to her parents ...".

"That's a great idea, Miss Venable .. what were you thinking of?", You tilted your head and wandered your eyes over the woman who was just standing in front of you.

The lavender suit, the way her hair was perfect and the dark lipstick ... she was so fucking beautiful.

Mina cleared her throat briefly when she realized that your attention was no longer on your conversation.

"You know, Miss Y / L / N, I love to watch your talented little fingers remove the thorns from the roses ..", she playfully raised an eyebrow and you couldn't help but laugh.

"How vulgar, Miss Venable .. just make sure that your girlfriend doesn't notice this, otherwise she'll get jealous ..".

You bent down briefly to get the box with the red roses from under the table. You put them on the table between you and Mina and took out the small knife to start removing the thorns.

"How was your day, honey?" You finally asked her after a minute had passed.

"Good," she said curtly.

"Good?", You looked at her grinning. "You sound like a school child who is asked how it was in school ..".

Mina shrugged her shoulders.

"I hate those idiots from my office, but that's nothing new ..".

"Imagine if I would work for you .. maybe you wouldn´t hate it so much anymore ..", you muttered while you still slid your knife over the flower stems.

"I think that wouldn't be a good idea .."

You just nodded and stared intently at the roses in front of you.

"What about the purple roses?", Your friend suddenly asked.

"What do you mean?"

"You had these roses once and never again .."

"That was a special delivery .." you explained and reached under the counter, took out the paper and wrapped the roses in it.

"But we can also make some ourselves ..".

You put the flowers in Mina's arms and looked expectantly into her confused face.

"How is that supposed to work?" She asked.

"You water white roses with purple color .."

"Should we try it sometime ..", she mumbled and you nodded.

"Listen Mina, you wait in the car and I'll finish everything here and then we can go home .."

"Sounds good .." she replied just before she turned around and strutted out of the shop.

----------------------

Her dark eyes stared at Mina in the mirror as she smoothed her blouse with her hands. Miss Venable was usually never nervous, which was because, due to her dominant demeanor, she almost always had the strings in hand when it came to dealing with other people and she didn't care how much she hurt someone with her words. But that was you, her precious little princess and what she wanted least of all was to see you sad because of her. She also knew that she couldn't win over your parents if she intimidated them.

She leaned forward to apply her dark lipstick when you stepped into the bathroom behind her and let out an impressed whistle.

"Is that the blouse you wore on our first date?" You asked, examining the silk fabric on Mina's skin.

"Yes .." she muttered.

Miss Venable's eyes watched you in the mirror while she admired how beautiful you looked in the dress you were wearing.

"My parents should just like you and not want to go to bed with you .." you said with a grin when her eyes found yours in the mirror.

"Ha ha ..", Mina made dry before she screwed the cap of her lipstick back on and turned to you.

"Are you ready?" She asked and you nodded while you smiled wryly.

"You look beautiful .." she muttered and planted a quick kiss on your temple before walking past you to leave the house.

"So to summarize again what my parents know ... or rather

what they think they know .. "you started staring out the window of the moving car.

"Well, actually they don't know anything .. I think they used to think that I had something with my best friend because he was my homecoming date .. And now they think I was single and I told them on telephone you were a good friend... "

"That sounds like it will be a very relaxed evening ..", Mina joked and you couldn't help but grin.

"I'm just afraid it might be a little too much .."

"Too much?" Mina repeated confused.

"Is it a good idea to come out and bring your girlfriend with you? Don't get me wrong, it has nothing to do with you .."

"Well ... you have a point, but let's speculate ..", Mina said when the car stopped at a traffic light.

"How could they react?"

"So .. we have these two iconic situations: The first situation would be this "we always knew it mimimi".

The other situation would be that they will be angry ... and so angry that they don't want to see me anymore .. "you explained and Mina could hear the concern in your voice.

"Something like that is sure not going to happen ..", Mina muttered as she took her right hand from the steering wheel and placed it on your thigh.

"I hope so .."

You were silent for the rest of the journey and that's why Mina decided not to say anything. Would you want her words, you would let her know.

"Here we are ..", Mina mumbled when she finally parked the car in front of your parents' modest house. She looked at you sideways and found that you were staring at the house as if you were about to start crying.

"Hey .." she cooed gently and grabbed your chin to force you to look at her.

"Everything will be fine..".

She examined your worried face and grinned when she saw that there was still a print of her lipstick on your temple.

"What?" You asked confused.

"You have my lipstick on your face ..", Mina mumbled and wiped her thumb over the print to remove it.

"And I think you don't want your parents to find out about your homosexuality that way."

"Not funny ..", you rolled your eyes.

Mina glanced at the car clock.

"We should go in, princess, we are already 5 minutes late .."

"Okay .. here we go ..", you mumbled and suddenly sounded brave as you leaned forward to press your lips against Minas for a moment.

When you both stood in front of your parents' front door and your mother opened the door for you both beaming, Mina immediately noticed the resemblance between you and your mother. This woman seemed just as straightforward as you, and you both had the same laugh. If your mom were really as carefree as you, then the evening wouldn't be complicated, Mina thought as she greeted your mother.

The first half of the evening was totally relaxed, your parents seemed to be really nice people, as far as Mina could tell.

While your mother was just as crazy as you, your father was a bit more introverted, but he had the same sense of humor as you and he was the one who cooked. A fact that somehow gave Mina hope, as it showed that your parents didn't seem to care about the old gender roles (cooking housewife and working businessman).

It was really nice. Mina, who usually had her problems with people, thought she might really like your parents at some point. they didn't ask private questions, didn't let an awkward silence reign, and were totally open-hearted people.

And yet she felt how nervous you were while you were sitting next to her at the dining table and trying to choke the food down even though you were probably extremely sick. Usually you played with your fingers when you were nervous or excited, but since your hands were holding the cutlery, it was your leg that was pushing off the floor all the time. And it was Mina who then, invisible to your parents, put her hand on your knee to calm you down.

It was around 9 o'clock when the four of you ran out of conversation and it was you who finally broke the silence.

"Well uhm, I actually came to tell you something .." you said and your voice sounded thick. Immediately all pairs of eyes were focused on you and Mina tensed her hand on your thigh to show you that she was there.

"Oh yeah?" Your mom asked confused before you nodded.

"Well, you always wanted me to be in a relationship with someone .." you continued and stared lost at the half-empty wine glass in front of you.

"And surprise..I'm in a relationship .."

"Oh really?", Mina could see your mother's eyes starting to glow and she wondered if the whole thing was really a good idea.

"Yes ..".

"Who is he?" Asked your father.

"Well uhm she's sitting right next to me ..".

Mina closed her eyes for a moment when she felt the confused looks of your parents on her. For a few seconds no one said anything and she felt you start to slide back and forth on your chair.

"Oh ..", Your mom finally pounded when she understood what you were talking about.

Mina opened her eyes again and stared into the flame of the candle that was on the table.

"You and Wilhemina ..?", Your mom looked confused between Mina and you.

"We've been together for almost a year .." you added and Mina heard your voice break at the end.

"What does being together mean?" Your mom asked sharply.

"She is my girlfriend."

"Girlfriend like best friend?"

"No, girlfriend like i love her ..", you muttered and looked carefully at Mina who smiled gently at you while she rubbed your thigh.

"Does that mean that you .....?", Your mother stared at you with her eyes wide open.

"I'm a lesbian, yes .." you said firmly and returned her gaze.

"Damn it .." your mom muttered and fell back into her chair.

Finally your father cleared his throat, too, who hadn't moved an inch before.

"How long have you known?" He asked, leaning forward.

"Since Highschool i guess ..".

"Since high school? Are you kidding me?" Your mom shouted angrily and Mina could feel you flinch under her hand.

"Why are you telling us this now?"

"Maybe because your most asked question to me was whether I have a boyfriend or when I will finally get one ..?" You croaked.

"Because we thought you were straight .." your mom yelled back. "If we had known that you were into women, we would never have asked such a thing .."

"I thought you'd be disappointed or something."

"Disappointed? Oh damn Y / N ..", your mother shook her head in disbelief and looked at you sadly.

"Can you say something too, Dad?" You asked after two minutes of more silence as you looked away from your mother to look at your father, who was staring at you thoughtfully.

"I uh ... so when you have a daughter, as a father, you imagine all the things your child has in store for you ..." your dad began.

"That includes the person your daughter wants to grow old with at some point and I just imagined that this person was a man and now it's a woman .. And now I need a few seconds to turn this man into one woman .. if you understand.."

"Okay ..." you replied quietly.

"You know, at the same time I wonder if I have said anything homophobic in all the years of your childhood that could have scared you .." he continued and you nodded slowly.

"Who knows it?" Your mother suddenly asked.

"Uhm .. some friends and aunt Phoebe .."

"Aunt Phoebe?" Your mother frowned when you mentioned your aunt.

You shrugged your shoulders.

"She noticed that Mina only comes to the flower shop when I'm there and then wanted to know why .."

"My sister knows that my daughter is a lesbian and I don't know?" Your mother called, sounding reproachful.

"I was afraid that you would be angry or something .." you defended yourself.

"Y / N you're still our damn daughter .." your mother mumbled and swore again.

"No Y / N, you are our daughter .." your dad interfered.

"There is no place for a  'still' because you are simply our daughter and your sexuality could never change that .. Who you love is your business and you do not need our permission .."

You stared at him and felt tears welling up in your eyes.

"You have no idea how happy I am to hear that .." you muttered before getting up and walking over to your dad to give him a hug.

"Thank you so much .." you whispered against the fabric of his shirt.

Suddenly you felt your mom, who had also got up, put a hand on your shoulder and pulled you from your dad's arms into hers.

And while you all played happy family, Mina was still sitting a little lost at the dining table and watching the situation in front of her. It all happened faster than expected.

In her  eyes, your father had taken it a little better than your mom, who seemed a little disappointed because you had only told them now.

"I should go to the bathroom to fix my make-up ..." you mumbled and smiled sheepishly as you withdrew from your mom's arms.

Your mother just nodded before you turned around to jump out of the room, leaving Mina alone with your parents.

"So you're a lesbian too .." said your mother, mumbling as your parents sat down again.

"I am.", Mina replied curtly and pressed her lips together.

"And is that serious between you?"

"It is."

"This is probably the moment when I should threaten to kill you if you break her heart .." joked your father.

"I'll propose to her," Mina said firmly.

"So it's really serious ..", your mother's eyes widened at Mina's words.

"It is .." repeated she.

"Well, we would be happy if you would invite us to your wedding..", your dad interjected and Mina decided at that moment that she liked your parents.

A few seconds later you were standing in the doorway and had your radiant smile back on.

"I think we should go now, Mina .." you said and Mina hummed in agreement.

"That's a good idea.."

As soon as you were outside, after hugging your parents for a long time, you jumped into the arms of your girlfriend to kiss every inch of her face.

"Jesus Y / N ..", Mina muttered, who stumbled a few steps back from your sudden attack.

"I'm such an idiot ..", you laughed. "I've been worrying for free all these years and now they have reacted so well to it ... I should have done that much earlier .."

Mina smiled as she pressed a quick kiss on your forehead.

"I'm proud of you, princess .."

"So and now ..", you shouted cockily and pulled her hand to your car.

"Now I want to get to know your mother .."

"No way..You don’t want to meet that witch ..".

----------------------

"Come on, Y / N .. you promised me .." Mina pleaded.

"But it's really cold up there and besides, I'm tired .." you replied.

It was New Year's Eve and the two of you had decided to spend the evening at your apartment and then climb onto the roof around midnight to watch the fireworks. To your surprise, it was Mina who suggested going to you, although she usually doesn't like visiting your "horror apartment".

"If you put on your winter jacket you won't be cold and besides, I'm there ..", Mina tried further.

"You know, I think the idea of ​​you as a human heater is really cute, but we could just drive to you ..".

"That wouldn't be the same."

You sighed.

"Okay ..", you mumbled and had your friend give you your coat.

Surprisingly, you found out that you were the only ones on the roof. At least you couldn't see any of your neighbors when you went over the roof to your self-made bed.

It was currently 11:37 pm and until the fireworks started at midnight you had enough time to watch the beautiful starry sky, as you always did when you were with her.

Your head was on her shoulder as always while she had an arm around you as always and was playing with your hair.

"I actually wanted to talk to you .." you mumbled after a few minutes.

"Is everything okay?", Mina asked and looked down at you worriedly.

You nodded quickly.

"Yeah .. it's just uhm, you know I love the flower shop, but I don't think that's what I want to do for the rest of my life ..".

"No?"

"No ..", you said. "That's why I'll catch up on my school leaving certificate and then probably study something ..".

"Thats great, princess .." Mina smiled gently at you.

"And what do you want to study?"

"History .. I guess and then I'd like to work as a professor .. At schools or colleges .." you mumbled.

"Professor sounds hot," said Mina and you had to laugh.

"The good thing is that when I study I can still live with you."

"Yes?"

"Yep .." you nodded. "We have a college in town, in case you forgot .. and if they take me, I don't have to move to campus ..".

"That would be great ..", Mina muttered and glanced at her watch.

11:52

"In 10 minutes it will be ready ..".

"Ouhh, we should stand by the railing .." you said before you jumped up and stretched your arm to help Mina up.

"Well ..", you began as you clung to the railing of the roof and leaned forward a little so that Mina was afraid you would fall off the roof at any moment.

"Josh lives back there ..", you explained and pointed with an outstretched finger at another tower block. "He is the brother of a friend of mine. He makes a lot of fireworks with his friends every year. Then my neighbors, the Andrews, who are not there today for whatever reason, always let a lot of fireworks rise from our roof, even though it is actually is forbidden .. And then there are all the people on the street who bring their fireworks .. ".

You stared at a group of people who were standing on the corner of the street in front of the bakery and were already setting off fireworks

"It occurred to me, I think Josh broke his leg and can't even go on the roof .." you mumbled with a frown and Mina hummed in agreement, not even listening to you.

As your eyes wandered over the city, hers glued to you and looked at you lovingly. She looked at her watch one more time (11:55) and took a short breath before reaching into the pocket of her coat to feel the velvet-covered can with her fingers.

You didn't even notice it when you were still happy watching other people's fireworks

"Okay, Y / N .. I'm not good at this, but I'll try my best, okay?" Mina said suddenly and you looked at her confused.

"What do you mean?"

"We've been together for almost a year and I have no regrets, except for one small thing .."

"Oh yeah?" You frowned as she continued.

"About a year ago you asked me in the evening, if I believed in love at first sight and I told you, that I generally don't believe in love and that was actually a lie. So it was true somewhere, I didn't believe in love until the moment I walked into your little flower shop and saw you cut your finger because of your lack of concentration.

You know how much I hate people, but with you it's different..I can't hate you and I never could hate you and I hope that you understand that between all the 'hate' I try to explain to you how much I love you .. because I do and I have no idea what I would do without you, I would probably just be a bitter old woman .. ", she finished and grinned when she saw you roll your eyes.

"I hope you're not mad at me, because I can't get down on my knees because of my handicap .." she mumbled and took out the small velvet box to hold it towards you.

"But do you want to marry me?"

You stared at her in shock.

"Shit, that wasn't a joke?"

"Does that mean no?", Mina frowned.

"God no! I'm just- Oh damn, Mina, of course I want to marry you ..", you grabbed her face between your hands and pulled her close to kiss her tightly.

"This is going to be great .." your eyes lit up as you pulled back.

"I already have so many ideas for the wedding, I'll take your name and all that .. Y / N Venable sounds amazing, change my mind.. and then I'll move in to your house and then I can catch up with school and maybe one day we'll adopt a lot of children from poor countries..".

"Slowly, Y / N ..", Mina laughed and took your hand to slide the ring onto your finger.

"We still have enough time to plan, let's celebrate New Year's Eve now, please..”

"God, it is beautiful .." you muttered, staring at the silver ring on your finger. Mina smiled as she leaned over to press her lips against your forehead.

"Happy new year, princess .."

"Happy new year, my dear future-wife.."

[angleicblossom]

Levi Ackerman One shot <3

im so so so sorry its this long i got totally carried away 

More soft Levi x sad oc because I feel the need to project my own feelings into a situation that will never really happen 😊.

Another day of training finished at around 7pm, I slowly made my way into the mess hall to have a meal before heading to bed, not like I was very hungry anyways.

These last few weeks, maybe months, I hadn't been feeling myself, not like I was a very outgoing person to begin with, but I at least tried to socialise with the others but now it feels like a chore so now I don’t even bother, I just wake up go through with my day, eat if I can and then sleep and recently it's been making me frustrated with myself causing me to snap more than I usually do during training and I think people are starting to notice.

As one of the first I was able to grab a plate with food on it quickly and slide into the end of one of the benches in the bottom corner. I picked around at the meat, vegetables and potatoes moving it around a little, not really having an appetite. A few people slid into bench alongside me and in front of me, it was Hange, Erwin, Eren and Captain Levi, they made small talk around me, I didn’t pay much attention to them and then I decided to get rid of my untouched food.

“Oi, where do you think you are going Kasey?” Levi voices called out and stopped me in my tracks and look back at him but avoiding his eye contact that he was sternly holding with me “I'm... uh not feeling the best” is all I could muster up as an excuse “well maybe if you ate a little you would feel better, you can't sleep on an empty stomach, right Hange” Commander Erwin commented and Hange nodded along spooning meat into her mouth, I sigh internally but put on a smile and nod whilst making my way back to the corner to wait them out but Levi grabs my wrist causing me to pull and resist a little on instinct but he ignores it “Eren move down so Kasey can sit next to me” Levi ordered and Eren tilts his head but moves anyways “can’t have a solider skipping meals” he says bluntly and nods his head towards the plate and so I sit down next to Levi, a little too close to the point of our thighs touching but he doesn’t seem fazed by it and continues eating his half eaten food along with the others, I can still wait them out.

I poke around it some more and eat small bites of the vegetables for another 10 minutes and by then it was only me and Levi left at the table, he lets out a loud sigh next to me and pushes his plate away from him and takes a sip of his tea “are you really not going to eat that” he turned his face to me and look at me then the plate with furrowed eyebrows and I just shrugged “ Captain, I don’t feel too-” “yeah yeah you don’t feel good, of course” he rolled his eyes and didn’t even let me finish making a bit of guilt fill me, he was only looking out for me “anyway your dismissed I hope to see you eat more” I nodded and never moved quicker to get out of the mess hall with Levi’s stare burning me in the back.

I made it to my room which I thankfully didn’t share with anyone, I unbuttoned the top two buttons of my shirt and undid all my straps and took them off to try feel a bit more relaxed, I took a long shower I think I was in there for about 25 minutes maybe more and I changed into a tank top and some shorts due to the summer heat that was creeping up on us. I brushed out my damp hair so there were no knots after doing this it was around 9pm and I was now laying on my bed staring at the ceiling when I suddenly heard a knock at my door making me snap my head towards the door and then it began to open.

“Who is it” I say, trying to see the person entre “Its Levi” He answers as he continues to push the door open with his foot because his hands were holding two cups of tea? I rush up to help him and open the door then close it behind him “is everything okay, Captain?” he just looks me up and down, nods and carefully sets one of the cups of tea on my nightstand next to my bed and then takes a seat on a spare chair at the end of my single bed. I felt a little awkward seeing him like this, he had a black long sleeved fitting top on, and some black sweatpants and he came here in his socks too, I looked around the room not keeping my focus on him “the tea is for you” he nods towards it and takes a sip of his own “I added some tea herbs that go well with the black tea that helps to calm you” He continued on and it was sort of...cute hearing him talk about something other than killing titans or anything titan related really, I smiled lightly and took the tea in my hand and took a sip, testing it out I had never had black tea never mind herbs.

I can feel Levi watching me intently as I remove the cup from my lips carefully “do you like it” I thought about it for a few moments, it was a little bitter with a tint of citrus to it as well “I like it, Ive never tasted something like this” I shift my eyes to him and take another drink before sitting it down and Levi keeps his in his lap, holding it in his unusual way. I was still confused on why he was here, and I wasn’t sure if he was going to tell me, I looked at him again and he was looking down into his teacup and swirling the tea around “I think I was a little harsh on you or maybe too blunt” he says out randomly and I'm shocked by him expressing this to me “oh no Captain please-” he cut me off again “just call me Levi there’s no need for the formalities, I've been watching you here and there during training and noticed how you aren’t doing as well as you used to do” so someone did notice, but Levi was the last person I would expect to notice a random cadet feeling blue about her life, I didn’t know how to answer him so I just looked down at my bare legs in front of me and he lets out a small sigh and piches his nose “Look.. I’m.... worried about you Kasey” after he said this, I feel the heat rise to my cheeks and try to hide it with my hair and grab the teacup and drink some more of the tea to distract myself, he coughs a little and shuffles around “I don’t want you to get injured or injure yourself if you aren’t looking after yourself here”.

He gets up and makes his way to sit next me on the bed and moves my hair from my face to behind my ear and I move my face away from his hand quickly after this and furrow my eyebrows “Kasey...” “sorry I'm just not used to being touched” he was quick to answer “don't apologise” I just nodded “are you.. Enjoying yourself being a cadet, Kasey?” this question makes me look up at him and he continues “is it that you don’t want to be here anymore? Are you regretting your decision picking the scouts?” he questioned, sounding a bit sad and I bite my lip, it's not that I don’t enjoy it I just don’t know how to, I fiddle with my fingers not knowing how to answer him “don't stay silent, I want to help you”  

I look at him with tears starting to swell up in my eyes, but I don’t let them fall out of my eyes “it’s...it’s not that, Levi I, I can’t feel anything good, I never feel happiness or relief or anything after I finish my training, I... I can't even talk to anyone because I don’t know how or what to say and it feels so exhausting even trying to interact with others, all I would do is let them down, there’s just nothing for me here... or anywhere, sometimes I wish to disappear, so I don’t have to live like this, I want to be able to feel all the good emotions but it's like... they just don’t exist inside me anymore and I don’t know how to get them back and I feel so alone here like no one understands this and I can't explain how I feel it's not like I should be this sad right? but I can tell you... I don’t regret joining the scouts” I put my face into hands and let tears out and I try to stifle my cries “H-how can I help you Kasey” he leans into me, I wipe my eyes and sit up straight and look into his eyes, why is he here.  

Without thinking I put my head into his lap and fling my legs up onto my pillow so I'm lying on my side staring at the door, I lay my hands on his knees and he tenses up a little “just... stay here with me, Levi?” I ask more than say and I feel him stretch over me to set him teacup next to mine and sit upright again and he starts to run his hands from the top of my scalp to the bottom of my almost dry hair “okay... I will” I sigh with a bit of comfort knowing I won't be alone, for tonight at least, “Levi... why did you come?” his hands pause for a moment then returns to their actions “Honestly, I'm not sure, I just had a feeling I had to come see you, but I must admit Kasey... I've always been a bit more than... interested in you and I didn’t want to leave a bad impression since we’ve only spoken a few times” I went wide eyed for a moment, more than interested? What did that mean? I didn’t give him an answer only feeling a bit of surprise hearing this from the Captain, I sit up and look at his lips then his eyes “what do you think of me, Kasey?” I didn’t know how to answer or what I wanted to say to him.

I lean in and close my eyes and Levi’s hand snakes up to cup my cheek and our lips touch and I furrow my eyebrows and lean in more, putting one of my hands on his lap and another on his chest. Levi begins to take the lead of the kiss a little more, tilting his head and with his other hand he pushed my hair away from my shoulder, I try lean in even more and Levi pulls away “you were almost pushing me over” he let out a small breathless laugh and rubbed his hair, I blush at how in the moment I got, and I mumble a sorry to him and catch my breath whilst looking at my lap, I look back up at Levi and he’s already looking at me, “what was that for?” I nibbled on my lip again and looked away to the side “I didn’t know what to say” Levi grinned a little “I’m glad we’re feeling the same way... sort of... don’t worry, I might not be able to bring your emotions back per say but... I can try show you that no one wants you to disappear and that you are never alone” he ducked down to look into my eyes that I was avoiding “okay?” He reached for my hand and lay his on top of mine and I blushed again “okay” I whispered back with a smile.

“it’s pretty late, aren't you tired?” I shrug and fumble with my fingers “a little, are you?” “a little” he replied back “that single bed looks a little cramped for the both of us, would you like to come back to my room?.... you don’t have to” “that would be nice” I answered without a second thought on that, sharing a double bed with Levi? Yes please.  

We both head out down the very quiet, cold and dimly lit corridors, turning right once and left once a few moments after the right turn before reaching Levi’s office, I've been in his office many times delivering notes and other things that Hange wanted to give him but always sent me, he opens the door and lets me walk in first then comes in after then closes and locks the door “this way” he says and takes me to another door that is where his bedroom must be. When I entre there is a big double bed with white silk sheets and a wooden headboard in the middle of the room “come on” he says quietly and opens the sheets for me to hop into the left side, I quickly snuggle into the sheets and bring them up to my nose, the smell of Levi surrounding me, he goes around and takes off his top, I couldn’t help but watch his back muscles move as he done the action I blush a little and look up at him once he turned around and gets into the bed with me and I suddenly feel a lot warmer than I already was “are you okay with this?” he whispered “yes” I whisper back and giggle a little at our hushed tone “good” he moves towards me and pulls me into him, and I let him, totally indulged in his warmth and scent, he rests his head on my head  with his arms wrapped around me  “get some sleep” “you too” I say and put my scrunched up hands on his chest and place a small kiss in the middle of his chest and drift to sleep

[phoneybeatlemania-bit-the-dust]

9. “Do you believe in soul mates?”

This was it; they were calling it quits. They’d been on and off each other for God knows how long - and throughout it all, they’d driven not only themselves insane over the years with the turmoil of their relationship, but the people around them too. It wasn’t difficult to observe the looks George and Ringo would throw each after John would make an insinuating remark, and Paul would ricochet back with one, perhaps more subtle, but just as bitter. And things would naturally only escalate from there, though few would dare to stick around to hear the real arguments, the real nastiness. It wasn’t difficult either to notice the tiresome eye rolls after they’d make up and were plunged back into their honeymoon phase. Of course, they’d never really outwardly stated that they were partners - after all, Paul had Linda, and John had Yoko; and that’s not even to mention that they’d never truly been sure if they were really together. They knew they’d had sex, but they never knew if it was more then that.

But there was something different about their breakup this time, it didn’t involve shouting, or crying, or desperate pleas to the other not to leave them, that would prove only to be followed by insults and orders never to speak to them again. No, this time it was simple, it was cathartic. It was a weight off their stooping shoulders.

Paul was sat at his kitchen table, a cigarette in hand, looking out of the window-door into his garden. It was a rainy afternoon in springtime - some strange sort of solace came from this, there was something comforting about it; perhaps it served, in his own mind at least, as a reminder that he had a fresh beginning now.

John was making himself a cup of coffee, black, as per usual. He came over, placing himself in a seat opposite Pauls.

They maintained that silence for some time - it wasn’t resentful, nor was it awkward, only it simply acknowledged that there wasn’t so much to say.

“D’you remember that time we bunked school,” Paul said contemplatively, “and we took our guitars and our little song book to the park,” he smiled to himself, knowing what he’d say next, “and then a coupl’a minutes after we got there, it started absolutely pissing it down.”

John smiled at this too, “Think we lost half the Lennon/McCartney anthology that day. The early years at least.”

“Well, the early-early years, I guess. Probably weren’t very good anyway.”

“Probably not.” John said, stealing the packet of fags from the table and lighting himself a cigarette, then proceeding, “Why’d ye bring it up?”

“Dunno. Just a fond memory I suppose.” As Paul took another drag from his fag, John smirked, “Didn’t I kiss you that day?”

“Yeah…” Paul grinned further at the thought of that, “we went back to yours and Mimi was out, so we opened up a bottle of…well, something…and then you kissed me. Big deal that when yer 16 or 17 or so.”

“Hm.” John hummed in agreement. “D’you want a drink?”

Paul thought about it for a second (or perhaps he just pretended to think, as not to look like an alcoholic), then said, “Yeah, alright.” Getting up and walking over to his drinking cabinet, he asked, “What’re we drinkin’ then?”

“Whiskey – neat.” John quipped back quickly.

“Bit intense for a rainy afternoon, isn’t it?”

“Not driving, am I?” he retorted with some sarcasm.

“Suppose yer not, no. Alright then - why not?”

***

Paul was at that stage of tipsy where you feel just about drunk enough to the let words that a sober you would never admit to, fall from your drunken lips. He expressed without batting an eye to his former lover, “You know, I never wanted you to hate me.”

“I don’t hate you.” John remarked in a simple response.

“You don’t like me much anymore though; yer always fighting me.”

“It’s only cause I love you – beneath it all, beneath all that malice, I love you. I love you,” the next words crept from his throat slowly, “and I fuckin’ hate me.”

Turning to him, Paul said in a strained voice, “I wish you liked yerself more. I mean, ive tried for years to make you like yerself more, but I just don’t know what to do with ye.”

John said nothing, just taking another sip of whiskey, and so Paul continued, “Did you ever like yerself?”

“Sometimes – sometimes im convinced ‘m the greatest-”

Paul interjected, “That yer bigger than Jesus.”

“Fuckin’ Americans…” he muttered back, gaining a small hum of a laugh from Paul. “But d’you know – ‘m only confused when I say those things. That hate – that self-loathing – it’s still there. It’s always there, but y’know, sometimes it hides.”

“Maybe we could’ve worked out, y’know, had ye not projected all that hate onto me.”

“Don’t act like yer blameless Paul, alright? Ye never would have had me. Not forever. Ye got yerself the wife and kids you always wanted, and what’ve I got?”

“You’ve got Yoko.” Paul suggested.

“Fuck off.” He whined back spitefully.

Defeated, Paul admitted, “Yer right – I can’t blame you completely; you are right about me wanting a family, and im sorry. Im really am; but I wanted more.”

With slight slurred speech, John groaned back, “Fuckin’ cheers.”

They went back to that consolatory silence for a few moments, until eventually Paul remarked, “D’you know, whatever happens to us in the future, y’know, whatever ill say to you someday - and I know ill say something horrible - I just want you to know that im glad that I met you,” he joked, “even though you’ve never given me a moments peace, I am still glad to have met you.”

With his usual stark, self-loathing, John responded, “Yer life would’ve been a lot easier if you’d never met me though.”

“Wouldn’t have been as interesting though. At least you’ve given me a coupl’a anecdotes to tell at parties-like.” John grinned softly at the little joke, but there was something melancholic in that smile; not offended or hurt, but inexplicably melancholic to some degree.

After another moment of quiet contemplation, Paul asked, “D’you believe in soul mates?”

“Don’t know what I believe in anymore, to tell ye the truth.”

Paul discarded this, and persisted, “Well I don’t know if I do – but I think, if they do exist, then…” he was reluctant to say the next line - it was just so American, so cliche. Still he continued, “I think you’re mine, y’know.”

“Not Linda?”

“Well, maybe Linda too - I don’t really know, can you have more than one soul mate?”

“Why don’t ye ring up George on this one, seems more like his area.” John quipped sarcastically.

“Nah, wanted to know what you thought.”

John stubbed out his cigarette, and declared, “I think – I need another drink.”

Paul chuckled softly at this, saying, “Yeah gowan then – pour me one too, will ye?”

“Alright.”

This wouldn’t be their last argument, in fact just a week or two later John would have enraged outburst at Paul again, and then they’d be back to where they started. But still, it was the end of something. Though something died with that earlier argument, something else was revitalised or rebirthed with this subsequent conversation. Somethings lost, but somethings gained.

*** @johns-diqi requested this one, took a screenshot of your ask though just cause id already answered it for no. 18 as well. Hope you enjoy! <3

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Satisfied, Part 54

First

Previous

~~~

The lady’s watch beeped.

Marinette grinned as she pushed herself off of the couch. She dug into her bag and handed over a wad of cash. “Thanks, Linda.”

“Of course.” She watched the woman count it and then put it in her pocket. “I’ll see you next week.”

“Nah, I’m going to see my better therapist.”

Linda rolled her eyes. “Harley lets you give in to unhealthy coping mechanisms, that doesn’t make her better.”

“Lalalalala! Not listening!” Said Marinette, ducking out the door.

“Right! Don’t forget your homework! Five more good things about yourself!”

“Oh nooooooo you’re too far away I can’t hear you!”

Linda groaned. “Ladybug, please.”

She sighed and stopped. She turned around, flashing a small smile. “Fiiiiiine, I’ll do it.”

“And they can’t have anything to do with how you help others.”

Marinette cursed. “I should have kept walking.”

“Too late! Have a good week!”

She spun on her heel and threw a wave over her shoulder. “You too!”

“And tell Red Robin to stop by!”

“Will do!”

She hummed lightly and ducked into an ally. “Spots off,” she said. She opened her jacket pocket and let Tikki fly in. She’d stopped using her purse to hold the kwami a few years back when a guy had attempted to steal it and she’d nearly given away her identity trying to get it back. Besides, she never had to open her pocket, so there was no stress when she was paying for something.

She pulled a normal yoyo from her pocket and started playing with it as she walked out the other side.

Marinette glanced up and grinned as she spotted the familiar yellow and black outfits. Signal, Orphan, and Queen Bee had recently started doing daytime patrols. Crime had dramatically decreased since, and Bruce was more than a little bitter that he hadn’t thought about it.

She gave a tiny wave and grinned when they sent some of their own. Marinette had given up on trying to keep the fact that she was friends with pretty much every vigilante in Gotham a secret. It turns out you don’t have to worry about people coming after you to hurt your powerful friends when they are, in fact, afraid of said powerful friends.

She heard her phone go off in her pocket and grinned. Also, the publicity was amazing for her business. That was also good.

~

She grinned and opened a portal under herself, dropping into the Siren’s living room.

“Hey, darlin’,” said Harley, who was far too used to this by now to even blink.

“Kid’s here?” Asked a Catwoman from the kitchen.

“No. I was talking to the plants,” said Harley sarcastically.

Poison Ivy glanced up from watering her plants. “Hilarious. But please do, they grow better when you talk to them every day.”

Catwoman sighed. “Whatever. What do you want to eat, kid?”

Marinette plopped down on the couch. “I’m not a kid. I wasn’t even a kid when you met me.”

“Oh?”

“Yes!”

“Then why don’t you tell us your identity to prove it?”

She rolled her eyes and stuck her tongue out at Catwoman. “Do I look like I’m under eighteen?”

“Do I look like I’m older than thirty?” Catwoman retorted. When she saw the small smirk forming on Marinette’s face she quickly cut her off: “Don’t answer that.”

She huffed. “Think about it. It’s been ten years, do you really think I was eight when we met?”

“Who knows. Human kids all look the same to me.”

Marinette groaned. “I’m not -- you know what? I don’t care anymore.”

“You do, though,” cooed Harley.

A scowl made its way onto her face. “Whatever. Can I use the misty-thingy?”

Poison Ivy handed it over and Marinette spritzed Catwoman. The woman hissed and batted it away.

“I’m choosing dinner,” she said dangerously as she disappeared to the kitchen.

Marinette fought between the instincts to laugh and curse, handing the spritzer back to Poison Ivy. She rested her head on Harley’s lap and smiled to herself as the woman started to braid her hair.

“We still on for that raid on Sunday?” Asked Poison Ivy.

“Sure. I’ll see if I can get Red Hood to go.”

Harley laughed. “I’m sure Batman wouldn’t be too happy about that.”

“Has that ever stopped him before?”

“True, true.”

Catwoman emerged with what looked like a burnt brick. She dropped a plate of it onto Marinette’s lap.

“Eat up, kid.”

She went a little pale as she stared at the food in front of her.

“Well, you see, about that...” She opened a portal under herself and disappeared.

~

She heard a click from her earpiece and flicked it on.

“Right, found one. Looks like a normal mugging,” said Jason.

“Location?” Asked Damian.

Jason gave his general area and sighed. “Right. I’m heading in.”

She listened in on the fight as she hopped from rooftop to rooftop.

Ever since Dick had taken up the Batman mantle (Bruce had, for the most part, retired), he’d made a few changes to patrols.

The first thing he’d done was make it mandatory that they communicate when and where they were getting in fights and transmit the audio. There had been the usual amount of backlash that arises when the bats are asked to do something for their own good, but they’d stopped complaining that it wasn’t necessary when Tim had walked into the manor for coffee with a knife sticking out of his side.

(She was pretty sure that he’d done that on purpose, but whatever.)

Next, he’d set up rotations so people actually got sleep some nights. They switched between two teams. The first (and best) was made up of Jason, Marinette, and Damian. The rest of the time it would be Dick, Tim, and -- occasionally -- Bruce. Most criminals opted for nights with the second team. She never could figure out why --.

They heard the click of Jason’s gun and Dick’s voice cut in: “Don’t kill them!”

Jason scoffed. “What’re you gonna do if I do?”

“I… Mari, tell him not to kill them.”

“Jason --,” she began.

“I’ll buy you a coffee.”

“-- is a grown adult who can make his own decisions.”

She could practically feel Jason’s smirk as Dick cursed.

“Damn, why are you so easy to buy? I’ll... um…”

Bruce cut in: “I’ll build a starbucks in the room next to yours.”

Her eyes widened. “Jason, if you pull that trigger I will never talk to you again.”

“You wouldn’t be able to stay away.”

“Try me.”

There was a short silence and then the click of a safety turning back on. Jason mumbled about how it wasn’t fair, along with a lot of other colorful things.

Marinette, however, was grinning.

~

She slipped into the house and yawned.

Damian looked up from where he was petting Chaton on the couch.

She raised her eyebrows. “Not even gonna detransform?”

He sunk into his hooded jacket. “It’s comfy.”

Marinette rolled her eyes. “Whatever, give me my cat back.”

“He’s our cat.”

She huffed. “He’s my cat. Give him back.”

“Why don’t we let him choose?”

She scoffed lightly and crossed her arms over her chest. “Not while you’re still Kitten.”

“I told you to call me BatCat!”

“And I told you that I’d rather you beat me to death with a spoon.”

He stuck his tongue out at her and detransformed. They set the cat between the two of them and made cooing noises.

Chaton went to Damian without even sparing her a glance.

“Traitor,” she murmured.

Both of their phones went off and they checked them.

Ah. The Thesmartones chat. It included Riddler and every bat except for Dick

The partners both groaned and opened the chat.

Riddleboye: Can one of you test my new escape room?

Her phone blew up and she glanced at the different chat. Whohastodoriddlersriddlethistime.

Queenbee: Not it

Therealdamianwayne: Not it.

Bruecbrucewayne: not it

Redhoodiewastaken: not it :)

Brucesfavorite: not it

Coffeeismygirlfriendmarinetteismywife: Not it!

Imsurroundedbyidiots: Not it

She groaned when she realized she was the only one who hadn’t done it yet.

Notsleepingwasaconsciousdecision: i hate you all

Damian had the audacity to laugh. She sent him a tiny glare and kicked him in the side. He cursed and she was only saved from his wrath by the cat currently resting on his stomach.

She went back to the original chat.

Notsleepingwasaconsciousdecision: im free monday night

Riddleboye: Thanks!

Notsleepingwasaconsciousdecision: its fine see you then

~

She raised her eyebrows as she stepped into the room and saw Tim awake, clicking away at his laptop. This wasn’t exactly new (far from it, really) but it was still sometimes, somehow, surprising.

She changed into her now well-worn hoodie and crawled into bed. She picked up her newest project, a new costume for Red Hood, and started stitching.

He wrapped an arm around her and drew her close so he could type.

She rested her head against his chest. She stitched in time with his heartbeat.

Her eyes glanced over his screen and she sighed lightly. “No information yet?”

He shook his head. “Nope, still don’t know how to help lower his cortisol levels back to normal. There’s nothing on it.”

“Yeah, it’s almost as if no one else on Earth has Scarecrow’s problem.”

This earned an eye roll. He closed the many tabs on cortisol inhibitors and pulled up a spreadsheet for work. “It’s always ‘reduce stress!’ and ‘take fish oil!’ and other things that we’ve already tried.”

“Yeah, but there’s nothing else we can do. We just have to hope that his therapist can help him work through it.” She blinked. “That reminds me: Linda said that you need to see her.”

“But I don’t have to see her again until Wednesday!”

She rolled her eyes. “It’s Thurs -- actually…” She checked her phone. “Friday. It’s Friday.”

Tim cursed. “So, that’s what I forgot.”

“What, the week day or the therapy session?”

“Both.”

She rolled her eyes.

He pulled away slightly for a second to grab his drink and then handed her a coffee. “Behold. Just the way you like it.”

A blush rose to her cheeks as she took it from him. “Oh, sweetie, you shouldn’t have!”

“Don’t worry about it. I was already making some for myself and yours isn’t hard to make.”

She grinned. “It’s going to be easier to get from now on. I told you I could get Bruce to buy us a coffee shop.”

He huffed and rested his chin atop her head. “Shut up.”

“Eloquent.” She teased. “Anyways, I think I’ve achieved favorite kid status.”

Tim laughed. “Please, bean. You’re not even his favorite daughter. Remember that time he bought Cass an entire police station’s equipment?”

She rolled her eyes and set down her project so she could cross her arms over her chest. “Shut up.”

“Eloquent,” he said, a cheeky grin on his face.

She laughed and tipped her head back to press a kiss to his lips. “I’ve decided I’m getting a divorce.”

He finally set his computer down, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her onto his lap. “You wouldn’t. You love me.”

She smiled and reached up, cupping his cheeks in her hands. “I do.”

Marinette pulled him down for another kiss.

~~~

Holy shit. It’s over.

Right, I’m going to get sappy for a minute so if you don’t want that then I would like to just thank you for reading! You can stick around if you’d like and if not then I hope you have a good life! <3

Okay, now for the emotions stuff.

For context, I’ve been writing a book for the better part of three years. Writing a book is... hard. Shocking, I know. But, in all seriousness, I’m not even halfway through.

I was getting really burned out on writing, and one of my creator friends suggested I do a ‘break project’. I didn’t want to jump into another book but I wanted to keep writing, so I said ‘fuck it I’ll go back to my roots fanfiction it is’.

I’d been reading a lot of Daminette lately, so I decided to put my own spin on the ship and write a cute fluffy fanfiction of around 30k words. Ha.

But, seriously, this project has been really therapeutic for me. It’s showed me that I can actually write a decent story, that people enjoy my writing, that I don’t need to go back and change things constantly...

This was kind of supposed to be a one-time thing and then I was going to disappear, but I found myself actually enjoying writing fanfiction. 

I don’t know.

The plan is now to continue. I have another fic that I’m currently plotting out. It won’t be daily uploads, because each ‘chapter’ is going to be an arc in itself and I don’t want to rush that. I’m not going to give too much of it away, but it’s another mlb x dcu crossover so stick around if you want some of that.

Since I’m still in the planning phase and all the chapters are going to take ages, I’m opening up requests. Feel free to submit a prompt. Or ask me questions if you’d like. I’ll answer in 2-3 business months.

With love,

‘Olivia’

~

Taglist

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<3

[sheeswee]

Maeglin canon rewrite cause hey, why not.

When Maeglin was brought to Gondolin, after the grief of his mother’s death, he was really looking forward to bonding with his cousin! Turgon was also quite kind to him as well, and when people would stare and whisper about how he was a cursed child and evil and wrong, his uncle would protect his honor.

Then behind the scenes, Idril revealed that she was disgusted by him too, and hated being related to someone like him (it was also from jealousy that she wasnt the only royal heir anymore) which really broke Maeglin’s heart. He wanted a cousin so bad.. Turgon could tell something was up, so he pulled him aside and was basically like “Maeglin youre my nephew you can tell me what’s wrong.” and Maeglin didnt want to offend him so he didnt end up saying anything (which unfortunately came across as suspicious to Turgon).

And when Turgon confronted Idril in private about it she told him a false story: that Maeglin had been trying to court her and was making advances on her despite being cousins, and telling him off all the time, which Turgon ended up believing...

Turgon in the end took his daughters side, and Maeglin was once again treated like an outsider despite having done nothing except be related to Eöl.

I also like the idea of Maeglin being mentored in smith-work by Celebrimbor. Maeglin immediately becomes attached to him, someone who matches his wit and has similar interests.. someone who wants him around.. someone who actually sees him for who he is and not who his father is. Because they have that in common, and Celebrimbor always understands. Their relationship blossoms, until for Maeglin it becomes obsessive. For him, he struggles deeply with any sort of bonds he gets out of fear of isolation and being abandoned. He grows jealous of people who would talk to or train under Celebrimbor as well, and let it fester into just another reason that he should betray the city. Because to Maeglin, Celebrimbor having other friends was a betrayal to him as well.

That’s what I have for a canon rewrite, but I’m tacking a little character analysis on the end here as well.

I feel a bad making Idril out to be so mean in this, but I prefer it to Tolkien’s “Maeglin was shunned by everyone for being creepy toward his cousin”.

The rest of his story is pretty much the same, his upbringing, Aredhel’s death, being captured by Sauron (who actually ends up realizing that Maeglin is lonely and bitter and uses this to sway him with sweet promises rather than torture), and then the fall of Gondolin and his death.

Even in the weird incestuos canon that Tolkien creates, I don’t think Maeglin actually loved Idril romantically. I think that Maeglin can’t tell the difference between affectionate emotions well, and assumed his admiration and longing for a bond with her was something romantic. In reality he was projecting because hes never been loved by anyone in his life. Well, besides his dead mother, who he was probably convinced thought of him as a burden too.

Its still weird that he wanted to marry his cousin, but I think he was majorly projecting and coping and trying to feel loved for once.

(even more rambling ahead)

im also pretending the “maeglin is auper awful and weird and horrible” was just unreliable narrator AND THE UNRELIABLE NARRATOR THEORY is like.... silm fans use it to excuse plot holes cause basically. The silmarillion is meant to be a collection of historic texts compiled and translated into one language by bilbo in valinor. So its him collecting a ton of old elf scrolls and translating them into one book. The unreliable narrator theory is basically that some of the texts he translated were slightly or heavily biased by the elves who originally wrote them. So if idril wrote about the fall of gondolin of course she would write what she wants you to believe(that maeglin was super evil all along and gross) which may not be true