olivia-anderson-fanfic

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Dancing 'til the Break of Dawn - Pt 35

<Pt34

(TWST Zombie apocalypse AU where Yuu beast tames just a little too close to the sun)

Despite being a cat, Grim was not stupid. He was possessive, selfish, and prone to ignoring the fact that Yuu was a separate person with his own wants and needs…

But he wasn’t one to take risks.

Especially not where Yuu was involved.

When Yuu had sat in his old apartment, oil slick over the floors, a pack of matches in his hand, and told Grim that he wasn’t going to be staying there anymore, Grim had listened. Perhaps because Yuu hadn’t bothered to make a small island in the oil where he could safely stand – Yuu had told him, on no uncertain terms, that if he wanted him to stick around, then Grim would have to let him out of the house.

Yuu had been let out of the house.

He had still set the place ablaze as he left, of course, out of sheer spite.

For what, he didn’t really know.

(Not Grim, apparently – Grim hadn’t minded. The place was only sentimental when his favorite pet was there, it seemed.)

Nowadays, Yuu wasn’t quite in the same position. He could pull Cater’s gun out of his backpack and press it to his head, but it wouldn’t be enough. Grim wouldn’t prefer that Yuu die, there was a reason he wasn’t a zombie yet, but Yuu knew, ultimately, if he ever did die, Grim would simply bring him back. Which meant that, if he was ‘bargaining’, it wouldn’t work as leverage. He needed to die in a way that Grim couldn’t immediately reverse.

He had no accelerants on him, and Ace and Deuce were close enough to pat out any smaller flames.

So, that fateful day when Kalim had pointed them out to the zombies, Yuu had made a simple decision:

He would give Grim what he wanted.

And let him see the consequences.

Grim would, of course, try to make Yuu ‘play nice’ with other humans. He’d seen what happens when Yuu was left with no one to interact with for too long, and was more than smart enough to avoid that. He would set up little ‘playdates’ where he would try to get Yuu to bond with whichever survivor was unlucky enough to be close by.

Enter Kalim Al Asim.

… exit Kalim Al Asim. Immediately afterward.

Yuu couldn’t bring himself to directly go against Grim’s wishes, thanks to that pesky thing called self-preservation skills, but he could find loopholes. He was supposed to play nice. So, he, as a good samaritan, informed Kalim of his bodyguard's daily attempts to assassinate him. Really, was it Yuu’s fault if Kalim took it the wrong way and kicked him out?

And Yuu had been ready to keep driving away any and every person Grim sent his way until Grim gave up and let him have his ‘friends’ again.

Yuu was stubborn, if nothing else, and he could and would outlast Grim.

He hadn’t expected to get sick, nor did he think he would be so hard on Grim that the monster would have to go to Ace and Deuce for help, but he wasn’t going to complain. It had certainly sped things up for him. Grim got to see how having them around had immediately made Yuu feel better (in a literal and figurative sense).

The zombie would be forced to come to one obvious conclusion: Yuu needed Ace and Deuce to be happy and healthy.

It was manipulative. It was, admittedly, bad for his already frayed mental health. But Yuu didn’t have any other choices.

Ace and Deuce couldn’t die.

And he didn’t trust Grim to keep his word. Not for long, not if Yuu could never prove otherwise.

Not if Yuu couldn’t retaliate even if Grim killed both of his ‘friends’ in front of him.

Because, ultimately, Yuu held no power here, and both of them knew it.

But it was, perhaps, because he was so ‘fragile’ that he could, sometimes, get what he wanted.

When in doubt, have a mental breakdown.

“I’m not a cat, Grim. Humans need social interaction.”

He could see the exact second the zombie softened, if only slightly.

Yuu blinked a few times, until tears formed in the corner of his eyes.

“You can get it somewhere else.”

“And what happens when I get too attached to the new people? If I had become best friends with Kalim, like you wanted, would you have gotten jealous of him, too?”

The zombie hesitated.

“How long do I have to keep doing this?” He gently disentangled his fingers from Ace’s, so he could wipe his face. “I can’t – I can’t.”

Grim looked stricken.

So did Deuce. He jumped to his feet, taking Yuu’s face into his hands, his thumbs swiping beneath his eyes to brush away stray tears.

Yuu leaned into him, if only slightly.

And then snickered when Ace wrapped his arms around him from behind, sticking his tongue out at Deuce from over Yuu’s shoulder.

The attempts to cheer Yuu up were, admittedly, a little clumsy. But the fact that they’d tried at all, in their own ways, was more than enough to make up for it.

He really might be in love with them, he thought.

“Please let them stay,” he said, quietly.

“Yuu, they –.” The zombie glared at the ground for a solid minute, thinking hard. “They’re corrupting you.”

Is that what it looked like, from Grim’s perspective? That Yuu had only started acting out when Ace and Deuce had gotten involved?

“Grim, the reason I’ve been lashing out more is because of loneliness. That’s why I burned down that apartment. I did that before I’d ever met either of them.”

Grim seemed to be struggling to process this. Perhaps because it put the blame almost entirely on Grim for isolating Yuu like he had. And Grim loved Yuu, so surely he couldn’t hurt him, right?

“... can’t you choose better people, at least?”

“Sorry, Grim, but they’re the only ones I want to keep.”

“They hate me,” Grim said, almost petulant about it.

“Because you make Yuu cry,” Deuce said, flatly.

“I would argue that you’re just as at fault,” Grim said.

“But look at who he goes to for comfort,” Ace said.

Something flickered across the zombie’s face as it looked at the two humans behind Yuu.

And then it smiled. “Actually… sure. If you can keep them on a leash, then you can keep them.”

… wait, what?

No, no, something was wrong. Grim should agree begrudgingly. This was too easy.

There was a catch. But what was it?

Something about how Yuu needing to ‘keep them on a leash’, probably? ‘Misbehaving’ was, in general, a subjective thing. It encompassed everything from glares to mild insults to outright murder attempts, depending on who was asking.

Yuu worried his lip. “O… ‘kay… I’ll allow a self-defense clause… on both ends, obviously… if someone physically attacks someone else, they should be able to retaliate…”

“Deal.”

A shiver ran through Yuu.

Was Grim… banking on Ace and Deuce trying to kill him?

Yuu… didn’t think they would. The risks were higher than the rewards. Sure, there was a chance that taking out Grim would get rid of his hivemind, but there was also a chance that the ‘control’ would shift to a different zombie (one that might not be quite so benevolent toward Yuu). Not to mention, burning someone alive isn’t exactly a quick process. Grim might take Ace and Deuce out with him, if they tried.

And they had all lived together for months without anyone trying to murder each other…

But Grim looked so confident.

What was Yuu missing?

He looked at Deuce.

Probably safe. He wasn’t likely to murder Grim. He was much more likely to grab Yuu and run. He wouldn’t be able to do that without Yuu’s consent, he wasn’t strong enough to carry Yuu all on his own, and wouldn’t get very far if he tried.

Deuce was, probably, safe.

He looked at Ace.

Ace flashed a halfhearted smile, pressing closer to him. “Trust us a little more, will you?”

Yuu hesitated.

”… okay.”

~

Yuu sighed as he tossed a match, something in his shoulders loosening as he watched that damned clothing store go up in flames.

And then he turned around, scooping Grim up so he could hug him to his chest, as usual.

“Feel better now?” Ace teased, slinging his arm around Yuu’s shoulders.

Yuu hummed, absently scratching beneath Grim’s chin.

(If his pinky hooked under the cat’s collar to keep Grim from snapping at Ace’s fingers, because the two were glaring daggers at each other, then that was no one’s business but his own.)

“Nothing like a little arson to soothe the existential dread,” Yuu said.

Deuce grinned. “Isn’t lighting things on fire a sign of psychopathy?”

“I’m pretty sure you should be worrying about our cannibal ‘friend’, not me.”

Said cannibal shot Yuu a look that screamed ‘call me your friend again and I will cannibalize you’.

Noted!

Deuce grinned. “I can worry about both of you at once.”

“I haven’t even eaten anyone in ages,” Ace complained. Whether he was complaining about the ‘mischaracterization’ or the fact that he couldn’t get his hands on any ‘food’ was up for debate.

“It’s not for a lack of trying. We just haven’t found anyone you can eat,” said Deuce.

Ace huffed, though he didn’t seem all that upset. “You eat, like, fifty people and suddenly it becomes your thing.”

“That is how it works, yea – fifty?!” Yuu said.

“Yeah, yeah, I know, I’m a terrible person,” Ace said, with all the false bravado the world had to offer.

“Nah, those are rookie numbers. You had, like, six months alone and you didn’t even manage to hit triple digits…” Yuu said, shaking his head.

Ace’s mouth dropped open. See how there was no Human Meat in there? This was, clearly, proof that he needed to up his game.

“Fake-ass cannibal,” Deuce joined in.

“Stolen valor,” Yuu agreed.

~

Deuce pressed his face into Yuu’s back. “‘May the best man win’, huh?”

Yuu shrugged as much as he could while laying on his side. Which is not much.

“I’m practical, what can I say?”

Because, really, Yuu wasn’t against the idea of running away with his partners like Deuce wanted… but, at the same time, he absolutely was. If they ran, they would never be able to stop running. There were more zombies than humans, these days, and the hivemind wouldn’t make it easy for them.

“Think of it this way: at least we still get to be together,” Yuu said.

Deuce sighed. “With a few limitations.”

His hand, on Yuu’s hip, flexed just slightly. Usually, at night, Ace and Deuce would hold hands. But that was before, back when Grim didn’t wedge himself between Yuu and Ace’s stomachs. Ace had retaliated by finding a way to cling to Yuu regardless, his arms around Yuu’s shoulders, his face burrowed in his neck, his knees hooked around his thighs... just overall determined to touch Yuu as much as was physically possible, out of sheer spite for what Grim was trying to do.

Yuu sighed, lightly. “There would have been limitations either way.”

They’d be able to do whatever they want, sure, but only for a short period of time.

Lips brushed against his skin. A quick, chaste kiss between his shoulder blades. “Yeah. I just wish…”

He trailed off without finishing the thought.

Yuu closed his eyes.

“I know.”

~

He felt a paw poke his ears, and Yuu fought the urge to tense up. He couldn’t look guilty, couldn’t incriminate Ace and Deuce, not after all of the effort he’d just gone to to keep them around.

“I don’t know,” Yuu shrugged. “I might’ve pulled them out while I was sick? Everything’s kinda hazy…”

“You gave him dangly earrings, right?” Deuce said, frowning. “You’re not supposed to sleep in those. They can catch on bedsheets, and then you have to say goodbye to your earlobes.”

If Grim didnt believe them, he didn't let anything on, content to curl up in Yuu's arms for the time being.

~

“Listen, all I’m saying is that there has to be things we can do other than read,” Ace said.

“Just because you’re illiterate doesn’t mean everyone else is,” Deuce said.

“Says the guy with the worst grades here,” Ace huffed. “And it’s just – boring. Like, ‘ooooh, look, a magic wizard school’. There are zombies, everywhere! I couldn’t care less about whether this one guy passes his alchemy class!”

“I think it’s nice,” said Deuce, sounding a little offended on the books’ behalf.

They looked at Yuu to break the tie.

Yuu took a long drag of his cigarette as he mulled over what he should do.

The ‘fight’ didn’t mean anything. They were arguing for the sake of arguing. It was a way to pass the time. Because, frankly, all of them were sick of sitting around and reading at this point. They had long since run out of things on their reading list. So, they explored and chatted and did basically anything else.

Despite this, he took Deuce’s side. What can he say? He played favorites.

“Sorry, Ace, I’m contractually obligated to take Deuce’s side at all times.”

Ace’s face always flushed a pretty shade of pink when he was annoyed.

“That’s not fair. Aren’t I your first?”

Yuu narrowed his eyes. Ace knew exactly what that implied. Grim probably wouldn’t know, it was a slang term that he doubted Grim would ever come across. It was ambiguous enough that Grim would probably just interpret it as Ace saying Yuu had found him first. But it was still an unnecessary risk.

“You should get addicted to shutting up. It looks prettier on you,” Yuu said, blowing a little bit of smoke in Ace’s direction to be petty.

“Already addicted to cigarettes, thanks to you two, so I’m afraid there are no slots left,” Ace said.

Yuu was very annoyed.

He also really wanted to kiss Ace at the moment, for reasons he couldn’t entirely understand (maybe the urge to shut Ace up by force?), and the fact that he couldn’t was only serving to make him more frustrated.

There was a tug on his pants leg.

Yuu looked down at Grim, his face immediately draining of all color. The zombie’s teeth were tangled in the fabric of his sweatpants.

Yuu, quietly, allowed Grim to drag him away from his partners. Grim wasn't placated until they were over two meters away from each other.

Ace had a knife in his hand. Yuu hadn’t seen him pull it out.

Deuce managed to make him settle down, thankfully, wrapping his hand around Ace’s in a move that both soothed his boyfriend and made it hard for him to stab something. Multitasking.

Yuu flashed a smile Deuce’s way. Deuce managed a smile in return, but it was much more wobbly — much less convincing.

They continued walking. The tension in the air was palpable, and Yuu feared no one was going to break it.

Yuu felt a hand lock around his arm and pull.

Now, Yuu was pretty used to being grabbed at. So, he had immediately followed the hand, content to let the universe (and, quite possibly, a complete stranger) decide where he was going. He didn’t even think to look at who had been dragging him along until several seconds had passed.

He turned his head, vaguely curious.

Ah… Ugly-Bob-Man… yay… he’s still alive… would have been a shame if he hadn’t been…

“Did Yuu just get kidnapped?” Ace asked, finally done processing what had just happened.

Even Grim seemed a little shocked and offended.

Ugly-Bob-Man continued in its mission despite this. In fact, it sped up a little.

Yuu’s eyebrows knit. “Um?”

He didn’t get an answer. Just a thin-lipped smile.

Okay, now Yuu was slightly unsettled.

This was, in his opinion, pretty bad. His tolerance for bullshit was way too high, and yet things just kept crossing that threshold. He kept raising the bar, why did the universe insist on jumping over it again and again?

They turned a corner, and Yuu came face-to-face with another group of survivors. A decently-sized one at that. Not what you want to see.

And, to be fair, the survivors also seemed uncomfortable and on edge at the sight of him.

Or, maybe, it was at the sight of the zombie beside him. Who’s to say –?

Isn’t that the guy from the perfume ads?!

He watched on, very confused, as Ugly-Bob-Man dragged Yuu over to Perfume Guy and forced them to hold hands.

Ugly-Bob-Man made a happy, slightly squeaky sound and clapped his hands together.

Perfume Guy looked at Yuu. The words ‘what the fuck’ were etched clearly in every (barely there) line in his face, but no one was particularly interested in going against a zombie’s wishes… it wasn’t directly attacking anyone, and neither of them were interested in changing this.

Ace, Deuce, and Grim finally caught up with them.

“Great! Everyone’s here! Now, we have gathered here today to witness the sacred union of Vil Schoenheit and Yuu –.”

Perfume Guy (‘Vil Schoenheit’, apparently) flinched. Hard. He stared at their interlocked hands in muted horror.

And Yuu felt much the same.

Because he was pretty sure he knew where this was going… but, surely, he was wrong. Grim wouldn’t –.

“Wait, wait, what’s going on?” Ace cut in.

“They’re getting married,” Ugly-Bob-Man said, flatly, as if Ace was the weird one for questioning it.

…

“WHAT?!”

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

he’s an unreliable narrator TO YOU. i believe him

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

what if: time loop. pov character's partner is doomed to die at the end of it every time. nothing they do can save them. but the pov character sees the time loop as a blessing. they dont have to spend any time without their partner. they get to live every day with them. they get to make sure their passing is as comfortable as they want. that they aren't alone when they die.

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

The cat that ate the canary

In which Yuu is a normal teenage boy who has recently adopted a totally-just-as-normal cat.

(Prequel for the zombie!AU)

You know, Yuu Shimura was a lot of things. A future vet, for one, if he had anything to do with it. A star student, if you ignored how often he was sent home halfway through the day because he had brought an animal to class. A decent cook, if you asked his mom, who also said that he was the special-est boy in the world, so take that with a grain of salt.

Good in stressful situations, he was not.

He didn’t know what to do about the dying cat he found while walking home from his friend’s house.

Don’t get him wrong, he wanted to be a vet! He had taken in so many charity cases over the years! But he had never…

Well, the cat was missing half a face. Its fur was matted with blood. There seemed to be a fungus growing on its tail. And it had a limp to boot (okay, to boot might not be the best way to describe a probably broken paw, but he had already admitted he wasn’t great in these kinds of situations!).

Frankly, this cat was far worse off than any of the other animals Yuu had taken care of.

And it was hissing at him whenever he got within a meter of it, too!

Admittedly, he was used to cats hissing at him, but it certainly wasn’t helping.

Now, Yuu should just leave the cat alone. Call animal control and ask them to put the cat out of its misery. That was the proper, good samaritan thing to do.

But the cat was in the middle of the street. It wasn’t quite the time of year when he would be too worried about snow, but it was just cold enough that every breath steamed in front of his face…

Yuu liked to think that he was a good person.

He knelt a few meters away from the cat, careful to keep his smile faint because animals often interpreted showing teeth as a threat. It was hard to smile, anyway, in the face of something so obviously in pain.

“Let’s see…” he mused aloud, trying to sound as soothing as he possibly could. “I need to find you food, at least. Not that it looks like you can eat right now… but it might help you believe I’m on your side. I only really need to pick you up for long enough to get you out of the street… maybe closer to a restaurant, they’re usually warm… I could, probably, just scare you into running in a certain direction, but that seems cruel… no need to traumatize you further… I’ll leave that for last…”

The cat continued to watch him. This wasn’t surprising. It would probably watch him until he left its sight.

Yuu ran his fingers through his hair, glancing at the nearest convenience store. They should have tuna there, but Yuu really didn’t want to leave the cat alone in the street…

“Ah, fuck it,” Yuu said, pulling cash out of his pockets. How much was tuna these days? Last he remembered, it was like 5 yen, but inflation existed, unfortunately… couldn’t be more than 10, at least.

He sprinted into the store and grabbed a can of tuna, all but throwing the money at the poor cashier, who looked more than a little stunned.

The cat… had almost managed to crawl out of the street on its own. It sat just in front of the curb, still staring at him intently.

Yuu, carefully, opened the small package of tuna and set it on the sidewalk.

The cat, still watching him, took a couple of steps forward, until it could tentatively sniff at the tuna.

Yuu breathed a sigh of relief. Not because it had eaten the tuna, the cat was gagging and batting it away with its paws, but because it was now solidly out of the street. He, with an open hand, reached toward the cat.

The cat eyed him warily, but he just, carefully, patted it on the head, briefly running his thumb over its fur.

It leaned into his touch, just slightly, its nose ghosting over his palm, sniffing him.

Yuu, quietly, hoped that the thing didn’t have rabies. It wasn’t frothing at the mouth, but that symptom didn’t set in immediately…

“Want to come home with me, baby?” Yuu asked, drawing one leg up to his chest. He always felt a little silly, talking to animals. It wasn’t like they understood him. But he found that, when he kept his voice soft and soothing, most of them calmed down. Animals weren’t particularly deceptive creatures, after all. If one had bad intentions, they made it obvious. So, if he seemed docile, surely he must be, right? “I might have to hide you under my bed so my parents don’t find out, but it can’t be worse than living on the street.”

The cat stared at him.

It, slowly, inched its way forward, until it could place a paw on his lap.

Yuu, gently, scooped it up and started off toward his apartment once again.

It was a relatively uneventful walk, save for the fact that it did, in fact, start raining. It was a light rain, just barely a drizzle, not the kind that you can take your umbrella out for without feeling a little silly… but Yuu took out his umbrella regardless, because it was too cold for rain, and this cat was already hurting, he really didn’t need it to catch yet another disease, too…

His apartment was quiet.

He clicked the light on, absently toeing off his shoes – he took a moment to make sure that his parents’ shoes weren’t there, more out of paranoia than anything – and made his way to his room.

He waltzed over to his closet and tugged out a small box hidden in the back corner.

Now, with most teen boys, the box hidden in the closet should not be touched, under any circumstances. Neither the kid nor the person snooping needs to deal with that kind of trauma.

Yuu, though? He was using his Secret Box to hide pet supplies.

He rolled out a pet bed for the cat and took a moment to scratch it behind the ears before dragging out a first aid kit.

And, so he got to work. The cat was a surprisingly well-behaved patient. It wasn’t the first time an animal had understood that he was trying to help it, but it was certainly the first time he didn’t get, at the very least, a look of betrayal for trying to cleanse a wound. Not that he was complaining. The cat looked sickly, and Yuu didn’t want to catch anything. The less it bit and scratched at him, the better.

Though… strangely enough, the cat didn’t have nearly as many injuries as he’d expected.

Like, yeah, half of his face was gone, obviously, and Yuu didn’t know how to deal with that so he simply wrapped it in bandages and decided that had to be good enough… but he wasn’t sure what was causing the limp. There were no injuries on the cat’s leg, not even a break or sprain, as far as he could tell. He still splinted the leg, because surely the cat wasn’t limping for no reason, and then moved on to the weird bit of… fungus? The strange spot on its tail.

He squinted at it, tempted to reach out and touch it, so he could analyze it closer, but not really willing to risk it. Instead, he cleaned it as best he possibly could (which, apparently, was little more than disinfecting it), and then pulled back.

The cat still looked worse for wear. It looked like something out of Pet Cemetery. Yuu had failed to make it presentable.

But he hadn’t expected to make the cat presentable, really, so he just heaved a great sigh and scratched it behind the ears.

“Alrighty, done,” he said.

The cat seemed content to lie there in his lap, unmoving.

Yuu sighed, again. He wasn’t allowed to move anymore, by cat-owner law.

He, slowly, tipped back until he could lay out on the floor. It wasn’t particularly comfortable, but it wasn’t like he had any other options.

His eyes fluttered shut.

By the time he opened them again, the cat had moved from his lap.

It was exploring his room, from the looks of things. Sniffing everything, rubbing up against each and every piece of furniture it saw, adding a few new claw marks to Yuu’s poor bedposts. Classic cat things, really.

Yuu sat up, slowly, wincing as he craned his head from side to side in a vain attempt to get rid of the crick in his neck. This must be his divine punishment for daring to lie on the floor. Who did he think he was, putting someone else’s comfort above his own? Really, this was his own fault.

This didn’t stop him from cursing under his breath.

The cat jumped at the sudden sound. It turned to look at him with wide eyes, staring at his lap, as if wondering whether it was supposed to stay.

Yuu fought the urge to coo over it.

“I should give you a name,” Yuu said, propping himself up on his forearms. He didn’t want to put a lot of thought into its name, considering it was probably going to die soon, but he couldn’t just call it the cat forever. It was dehumanizing!

Well, it wasn’t ‘human’, but that’s beside the point!

So, he carefully took all of the books out of his bookshelf and set them on the floor, deciding that whichever book the cat ‘chose’ (read: lingered by for longer than two seconds) would be the basis for the cat’s name.

The cat wandered over to the bookshelf, its nose poking at the single book Yuu had left.

Yuu grimaced as he picked up The Brothers Grimm. He’d had to buy it for his Culture elective. Something about understanding Western Culture. As if the internet wasn’t almost entirely Western Culture. Ugh.

Regardless…

“That – uh – isn’t the best name, it doesn’t really bode well for you…”

The cat continued to inspect the book.

Yuu sighed. “‘Grim’ it is, then.”

He felt a paw touch his side and raised an eyebrow. Grim was poking him in the stomach, repeatedly, staring up at him.

When it was sure Yuu was paying attention, Grim gave a squeaky little meow and started rubbing his face against Yuu’s side.

Yuu figured that Grim was, probably, starved for affection, and Yuu really didn't want to think about why... but that didn't stop him from thinking that Grim was adorable.

He reached down and scratched beneath Grim’s chin, careful of his injuries. “You’re a sweet little guy… can’t believe someone did this to you… poor baby…”

Grim gave a low purr, for just a second, before cutting himself off.

Yuu cooed, quietly. What a cutie.

He would have rested his chin in his hand, but dried blood had long since caked itself under his fingernails, so he really didn’t think that’d be a good idea.

Speaking of which.

“I should give you a bath,” Yuu said, already grimacing preemptively. “Any chance you’re one of those rare animals that’re okay with water?”

The cat stared at him. Whether this was because Grim had, from the looks of it, never seen water in his life, or if it was just because cats don’t understand human language was anyone’s guess, really.

Yuu scooped him up and headed into the bathroom. Grim seemed content to curl up in Yuu’s arms while Yuu awkwardly juggled a very injured cat and tried to set up the sink at the same time.

It was hard, but Yuu managed.

Now for the actual hard part.

He, slowly, set Grim on the edge of the sink.

“Look, it’s nice and safe and I made sure it was the perfect temperature just for you,” Yuu said, trying not to sound too nervous. If he sounded nervous, then Grim would notice and get nervous himself, and he would definitely refuse to go in the water then.

So, Yuu had to smile, softly, and trail his fingers in the water to show that it wasn’t dangerous.

Grim looked at Yuu. Looked at the water. After a long moment’s hesitation, Grim placed his paw in the water, as if testing the temperature for himself.

(Now, obviously, Grim was just testing to see if the water was truly ‘safe’, but Yuu liked to pretend that the animals he spoke to understood him, sometimes. Made him feel slightly less silly.)

Slowly, Grim waded into the water.

Thank you, Jesus! Wait – is Jesus the name of their God? Or are they separate people…? Uh, whoever did me this solid, thanks.

Yuu beamed. If Grim was safe to kiss, he would totally press a kiss to his forehead, but that could wait until after the bath… after a week’s-worth of baths, actually. To be safe.

For now, he went to work.

It was then that he noticed the strangest little tidbit of information about Grim:

Was Grim… green?

He hadn’t noticed it before, since the blood matting Grim’s fur had more or less covered the strange color. But, now, he carefully parted Grim's fur to peer at the skin hidden beneath it.

Yuu tilted his head this way and that. Blinked a few times to clear his vision. Lifted the cat out of the water to get it as close to the lights as possible.

No, yeah, that was green.

And, as Yuu started putting a little more elbow grease into scrubbing down Grim, he realized that it was not going to come out.

Yuu frowned. If it was dye, then he should be getting at least a little on his hands right now, right? He was pretty sure he’d heard his mom complain about accidentally getting black dye all over her towels before…

So, what was going on?

He leaned his hip against the rim of the sink.

“Maybe the dye’s been in there too long? So it can’t be washed out?” he mused aloud. “But it’s still…”

It would be one thing if the cat’s fur was green (and, to be fair, that might also be a dark shade of green that was making Yuu second-guess what color black cats were) but it was Grim’s skin that gave him pause. Because how does skin turn green?

Was it some kind of fungus? But he could see something that looked like mold on Grim’s tail, and that was a completely different texture...

It was possible that the cat had developed two separate types of fungal infections, but Yuu felt like that would make Grim particularly unlucky… there was no other explanation that he could think of, though.

He supposed he could look it up once he was done with this.

And, so, after washing as much of the grime and blood off of Grim as he possibly could, he gave the sink a quick scrub and then waltzed over to his bed, phone in hand, to do some research.

Grim settled down on the bed next to him, and Yuu flashed a smile as he continued scrolling through the internet.

Huh. So there are ways skin and hair can turn green, even in human patients… exposure to chemicals, mostly. Learn something new every day.

“So, Grim, did you eat…” He squinted at the words on his phone. “‘Ex-o-gene-ous copper’?”

The cat did not answer him. Because it was a cat.

But Yuu nodded along as if he had. “See, that’s what your problem is. Nevermind probably getting hit by a car, no, you fucked up when you saw a precious metal and said ‘is anyone gonna eat that?’”

Grim continued to stare at him.

Yuu smiled, patting him on the head once. “You’re so well-behaved. I’d give you treats, but…”

Well, the cat couldn’t even stomach tuna. He doubted it would be able to get down something as solid as cat treats.

Grim wouldn’t last long.

But Yuu was going to make sure that Grim’s life up until his passing was as peaceful as he could make it.

Unfortunately, he couldn’t spend every second with his new cat, because he needed to make sure his parents wouldn’t catch on.

He needed to act natural.

“Did anything happen today?” his mom asked.

Did she know?!

No, no, he shouldn’t panic. This was a normal question that people ask over dinner. She was just ‘expressing interest in his life’, or whatever.

Yuu set down his chopsticks, briefly, while he tried to think of something that wasn’t the cat in his room. “Not really. I saw this one girl trip and eat sh –... really hurt herself. It was terrible.”

His mother narrowed her eyes at him, briefly, but decided to let it go.

Or, at least, she was willing to let go of the near slip of his tongue. His behavior, though? No, that was unforgivable, apparently: “And you didn’t help her?”

“I couldn’t make her un-trip,” Yuu shrugged.

“This is why we’re never getting grandkids,” she lamented.

His father sighed. “Truly tragic.”

Yuu couldn’t roll his eyes at his parents without being rude, but he was rolling his eyes in spirit. Because, really, that was not the reason why they weren’t getting grandkids.

“Well, if you’d just accept the grandchildren I have already given you –.”

“Human grandkids.”

Yuu did not pout. No one can prove it, therefore he didn’t.

“I’d rather just focus on my studies, momma.”

(He’d tell them one day. Just… not today.)

A hand reached out and ruffled his hair, and Yuu flashed a grin.

“What did we do to have such a well-behaved kid?” his father said.

“Perhaps too good of a kid,” his mom said, her chin in her hand. “You’re in high school, you should enjoy it, Yuu. ‘Hang out’ with your friends more. What about that one senpai you really like? He’s probably free this week, how about you two go to an arcade or something?”

Yuu rubbed the back of his neck, fighting the blush creeping up his cheeks. “He – uh – isn’t really the type to go out and do things, either. And, besides, he’s got his new job, he’s super busy these days, so even if he did want to go out, he can’t.”

“Staying at home all the time can’t be good for you,” his father said.

Yuu could only shrug. “Hey, think about it this way – the less I go outside, the less strays I can pick up!”

The totally-not-a-stray Yuu picked up lasted longer than he’d originally assumed it would.

Grim survived until the end of the week.

Hell, he survived two weeks.

And Yuu wasn’t even sure how. The cat refused to eat anything Yuu gave him, and Yuu had yet to see evidence that the water disappearing from Grim’s dish was anything more than evaporation. Certainly, Grim should have passed away by now, and yet…

Well, Yuu had noticed a distinct lack of bugs over the past few days. Maybe Grim was catching and eating those? But then why was he gagging over the food Yuu gave him?

Maybe he liked the hunt!

Yuu tied a small bite of chicken to a piece of string, and then made his way over to where Grim was lazing in a patch of sun.

Grim’s ear flicked, and he, slowly, looked up at Yuu.

Yuu wiggled the string like his life depended on it.

Grim gave him a very unimpressed look.

So, not that, then…

He groaned, sinking to his knees, resting his arms on the sill beside Grim. “I don’t get iiiiiit,” he whined.

Grim continued to give off an aura of general disdain. Which is typical for cats, so Yuu wasn’t particularly worried.

(… not about that, at least.)

He pressed a kiss to Grim’s forehead. “You’re cute, but you won’t be quite as cute if you waste away into nothing because you won’t eat.”

Grim, being an animal who couldn’t understand a word Yuu said, sent a few lazy blinks his way.

Yuu groaned again, a little louder this time, before giving up.

His eyes fell to the ground, several stories below. He could see a couple of teens chatting with each other as they walked home from… whatever they had been doing with their Winter Break.

Hm. He should call his senpai.

Not because he thought Idia would know what to do about Grim. But because Idia was prone to shutting himself inside his house for weeks at a time. Someone had to drag him back into the world of the living from time to time, and Yuu took his job… well, not very seriously, considering he himself was prone to getting distracted by every cute animal that wandered into his sight line, but when he remembered to do it he sure did!

And, so, he dialed Idia’s number.

His phone didn’t even finish its first ring before a familiar voice came through: “Shimura-shi, you’re alive.”

“Senpai,” he said, trying not to sound too happy that Idia had actually picked up.

“I was wondering when you’d remember I exist,” Idia said. Yuu could hear the familiar clicking of Idia’s keyboard through the phone.

“Aw, that’s not fair,” he said. “You’d get it if you saw my new baby.”

Idia sighed. “Is it a cat? Because otherwise I’m not interested.”

“He is a cat, yeah,” Yuu said, absently running a hand over Grim’s fur. “And he’s so precious. I don’t know what his previous owners did to him, but they’re going to Hell.”

“You’re religious now?”

“Solely for the sake of sending them to Hell, yeah,” Yuu said, nodding solemnly even though he knew Idia couldn’t see. He could only hope that his tone was enough to get the point across. “Do you want to say hi to him?”

“Obviously,” said Idia. Yuu wasn’t sure why he’d bothered to ask.

He put the phone on speaker. “Grim, say ‘hi’!”

Grim stared at Yuu for a solid five seconds before heaving a kind of put-upon sigh and meowing quietly.

The sound that came through his phone was a squeal so high-pitched that it spooked Grim. The cat’s fur stood on end, and that was all the warning Yuu got before his lovely companion darted away to the safety of Yuu’s bed, disappearing under the blankets, never to be seen again.

“Damn, senpai, are you trying to make me go deaf?”

“Sorry – it’s just – you know how I feel about cats!”

Yuu sure did.

But that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to tease Idia a little, when given the opportunity: “Says the guy whose job does animal testin –.”

“Shhhh, not in front of the baby!”

Yuu snorted. “Grim ran off when you broke the sound barrier earlier. But fine, fine, I’ll take you off of speaker.”

He brought the phone back to his ear.

“Alright, you’re safe now, my child can no longer hear about you and your shady secret internship at a ‘makeup factory’.”

“Our child,” said Idia. It was clearly an attempt to get Yuu to leave the subject of Idia’s job alone, Yuu was already well aware that the guy was beholden to several NDAs.

And yet.

Yuu felt his face warm, and was suddenly glad that Grim couldn’t see him. Not that Grim would understand what it meant, of course, but it was still embarrassing.

“Really? You need to step up in the child-care department, then,” Yuu said.

“Well, I’m busy taking care of our other child, so,” Idia said.

Yuu’s smile faded, if only slightly. “How’s he doing?”

“Same as usual. Do you want to talk to him?”

“If he’s feeling up to it,” said Yuu.

There was about a minute of silence. Yuu could hear quiet chatter, but couldn’t quite make out the words.

And then:

“Yuu-tan?”

“Hey, Ortho-chan,” Yuu said, quietly. “How’s it going, bud?”

“Good!”

Yuu’s shoulders relaxed, if only slightly. “Yeah?”

“Mhmm! Nii-san played with me alllllll day!”

Yuu smiled. “That’s awesome!”

“... wish you would come n’ play with me, too, sometimes,” Ortho said, and Yuu could practically hear the kid’s pout over the phone.

Awwww… baby’s first attempt at manipulation!

“Sure, bud. Next time you’re having a good day, you, me, and Idia-senpai can go to an arcade or something,” Yuu said.

“Promise?” Ortho said, sniffling.

Yuu smiled. “Promise. Now, tell me about your day. What games did you play? They better have been appropriate.”

“Well…” Ortho said, which was not a good sign.

“Maybe I’ll drop by sooner than expected,” Yuu muttered. “Need to punch some sense into him.”

Ortho giggled, and Yuu smiled, and Yuu spent the rest of the day listening to the younger Shroud brother talk about the new fighting game Idia had introduced him to.

(It was definitely not appropriate for children, and Yuu was going to grab Idia by the shoulders and shake him the next time he happened to catch sight of that damn otaku.)

By the time dinner rolled around, Grim was visibly sulking on Yuu’s bed, glaring at him with his head in his paws.

“Awwww, are you jealous?” Yuu teased, walking over and scratching the cat behind the ears. “Don’t worry, you’re my favorite.”

Grim narrowed his eye at him, but eventually caved, leaning into Yuu’s hand with a soft meow.

Yuu smiled and pressed a kiss to the top of his head. “Cute.”

And, so, life went on. Grim continued to survive despite all odds, and Yuu continued to take care of him.

He could admit that he was getting a little attached.

But, really, who wouldn’t fall in love with an adorable little cat when they’d been taking care of it for almost a month?

It was at the one-month mark that Yuu felt the bed next to him shift and peeked an eye open sleepily.

The cat was right in front of his face.

It settled down, slowly, on his pillow and started to purr.

Yuu grimaced a little, internally. He really didn’t want to risk rolling over in his sleep and crushing Grim, but… Grim wouldn’t understand if he tried to tell him that. He would just assume that Yuu was rejecting him, and Yuu wasn’t going to do that right when Grim was opening up.

He scooped up the cat and hugged Grim to his chest.

Grim purred quietly, kneading biscuits into the fabric of Yuu’s sleep shirt.

Yuu smiled faintly, pressing a kiss to the cat’s forehead and settling in for a probably-terrible night’s sleep.

Winter Break was coming to an end, anyway, he needed to get used to Not Sleeping again. It’d suck less when school started, that way.

His masterful planning for the future did nothing for him.

It was time for the first day of school, and his alarm was blaring, and Yuu was glaring at the ceiling. Grim hissed at Yuu’s phone. This did not help his mood.

He, silently, counted to ten.

He failed to count to ten because he was too busy seething at the fact that he had to go to fucking school. And he had to wake up extra early to physically drag Idia to class, because Idia was an awful human being who refused to attend class if Yuu didn’t make him.

Yuu rolled out of bed. Failed to land on his own two feet. Hit the ground in a series of dull thuds.

He was going to kill someone.

Maybe he understood Americans, after all.

He ran his fingers through his hair, exasperated.

And then he started getting ready.

It was harder than it should be. Grim was still on edge, it seemed, thanks to the alarm, and was winding around Yuu’s legs, meowing frantically at him.

Yuu flashed a smile. “It’s fine, baby, it’s just school.”

Grim didn’t understand. Because Grim was a cat.

Yuu knelt to press a quick kiss to Grim’s forehead. “I’ll be back in a few hours.”

Grim, of course, continued to panic.

And, while it ached Yuu to leave Grim alone while he was panicking, Yuu couldn’t just stay. He had a life to live, school to attend, a stubborn senpai to drag to class.

Grim would realize, when Yuu came home, that it would all be fine.

But in order for Grim to realize this, Yuu had to leave in the first place.

He set Grim in the bathroom, and then headed off.

Idia's house was, thankfully, only a short walk from his apartment. As one would expect, seeing as they went to the same school.

He rang the doorbell.

Idia opened the door in his pajamas.

"... senpai."

"I forgot there was school today," Idia lied through his teeth.

Yuu sighed and brushed past Idia, into the house. "Go get changed. I'll wait."

Idia grumbled about how this was a crime against NEETs. Nevermind that the guy wasn't definitionally a NEET, considering he was both employed and in school. Yuu was, apparently, evil and discriminatory.

Idia walked in a few minutes later, reluctantly. His bright blue hair (Ortho had asked him to dye it, and Idia never said no to his brother) was a mess, and that huge hoodie was not up to their dress code, but Yuu was going to take what he could get.

Yuu glanced behind Idia, at the empty hallway. Usually, Ortho would come and say 'hi'...

“... bad day?”

“Yeah,” Idia said, his smile a hair awkward. “I think there’s time to go check on him, if you want.”

Yuu hummed, glancing at the time. It’d be close… but, really, their teachers wouldn’t care. They got top grades, consistently. Their school wasn’t going to risk pissing them off, not over small things like tardiness or attendance, lest they transfer to a different school.

He stepped past Idia, walking further into the familiar flat. It smelled sterile, like a hospital room. Yuu had never figured out whether that was because Idia’s parents were both doctors and therefore carried the scent home with them, or if they simply sterilized the place for Ortho’s sake. Perhaps both.

He knocked, lightly, on a door.

And then let himself in.

Ortho was in bed, curled around a giant plushie. Yuu, vaguely, recognized it as a character from that one Disney movie Ortho watched religiously, but he couldn’t put a name to it.

Yuu kept his eyes on Ortho. He hated looking at the medical equipment by the kid’s bed.

Ortho sat up, slightly, and flashed a weak smile Yuu’s way.

Yuu hesitated.

He looked at Idia. “... want to attend class virtually today?”

Idia grinned. Yuu strongly suspected that Idia had been planning this. But he wasn’t so petty that he’d make Ortho miserable just to spite Idia.

(And it wasn’t like he loved attending school, anyway.)

“I’ll get a spare computer for you.”

True to his word, Idia came back bearing two computers.

… and two Switches.

Yuu sighed. “If you keep skipping class, they’ll hold you back, senpai.”

“If I get held back then we get to go to the same school for an extra year,” Idia said.

Yuu narrowed his eyes.

“You know they’d never hold me back, anyway.”

He shook his head, exasperated, but took a seat beside Ortho and booted up the Switch. “Any requests?”

Ortho shifted to rest his head on Yuu’s lap. “The one Nii-san sucks at.”

Yuu snorted. Idia gasped in mock offense.

“You like him more than me!” Idia accused.

Ortho nodded his agreement.

Now Idia looked like he might actually be offended.

“You just don’t know what Shimura-san 's actually like,” Idia sighed. “He’s a handful. He’s lucky he has such a competent senpai taking care of him.”

Yuu rolled his eyes. “You’re not gonna be my senpai for much longer, at this rate.”

Idia smirked. “Even if I did get held back two years, you’d probably still call me ‘senpai’.”

Yuu considered this. “I don’t know what I’d call you. Idia-san?”

A shiver of disgust ran through the two teens.

“You can’t be held back,” Yuu said, seriously.

Idia nodded, putting his hand out.

Yuu shook it.

And then they started playing video games instead of paying attention to their online lectures.

(At least Ortho seemed to enjoy watching them try to ruin each other’s games.)

A few days into the school year, Yuu was confronted by his parents:

“You have a new 'pet project', don’t you?” his dad asked, mildly exasperated.

Yuu blinked a few times, and then shook his head. “No…?”

“The Howl family says that their dog has gone missing,” his dad said, throwing an accusatory glance Yuu’s way. As if he had something to do with it.

Which was fair enough, honestly. He’d picked up a lot of animals over the years, but he hadn’t picked up a dog recently. And, assuming the Howl family had a collar on their dog, he would have given it back to them the moment he realized the dog had a proper home.

Now, he could point this out. However. He was much more interested in being petty.

Yuu crossed his arms over his chest. “And why does the – I forgot their name.”

“Howl.”

“Right! Why does the Howl family get to have a pet and we don’t?”

“If they want to risk getting kicked out of their apartment, then that is their own decision.”

“But, dad, you don’t understand. We could have mutually assured destruction.”

“Tempting,” his dad said, dryly.

Before Yuu could convince him (because surely his father was only a few more sentences away from caving, look at those positive responses!), his mom came in bearing dinner.

“Thanks, momma.”

She pressed a quick kiss to his temple, before collapsing in her chair. “You will not believe what I had to go through today.”

Yuu tipped his head to the side. “It was a meeting, right?”

“Yes,” his mother said. “My coworkers are so…”

She made a squeezing motion with her hands.

Yuu nodded along like he understood. Maybe he did. There were certainly days where Idia was extra annoying.

He was quick to excuse himself from dinner.

The second he closed the door to his room, he allowed a grin to steal its way across his face.

They had confronted him about the wrong animal.

Oh, he was so in the clear.

This cat was his.

There were a few problems with that, though.

It became clear after a solid week and a half of leaving and coming back that Grim was not getting used to Yuu’s need to go to school.

Grim had separation anxiety. Or trauma. Or both.

Yuu knelt in front of his beloved cat. “I’ll be back in a few hours. You’ll probably sleep through it, anyway.”

Grim continued to look betrayed.

He pressed a kiss to his forehead. “I’m sorry, bud, I don’t have a choice. Gotta go to class, y’know?”

Grim did not know. Because Grim was a cat.

Grim tugged at Yuu’s pant leg, meowing sadly.

While the cat wasn’t getting used to Yuu leaving, Yuu was getting used to the daily routine of ‘wake up, get ready, console cat, leave’. It was getting steadily easier to close the door in the cat’s mournful face.

It still sucked, don’t get him wrong. Yuu wanted to be a vet for a reason – he hated seeing animals in needless pain. But, sometimes, there really isn’t anything you can do.

So, he gently nudged Grim out of the way with his foot to make sure his whiskers couldn’t get caught in the door, and then started off toward Idia’s house.

Yuu’s growing apathy, in hindsight, probably wasn’t helping things on Grim’s end.

He stared at the thin trail of blood on his floor, his stomach flipping.

“Grim?” he called, setting his backpack on the door handle just to make sure that he wouldn’t somehow throw the thing and hit his apparently already injured cat. “Where are you, baby?”

He found the cat curled up in his bathroom. One of Grim’s legs had been twisted at a strange angle.

Now, Yuu wasn’t stupid. He knew that this injury was, probably, self-inflicted. There was nothing Grim could do in Yuu’s room that would end in him getting injured, especially not to this extent.

Animals are simple creatures. But they can still recognize patterns.

Yuu had taken Grim in because he was hurt. And, now that Grim was getting better, Yuu was suddenly fine leaving him alone for hours at a time.

It didn’t matter if that wasn’t actually why Yuu was leaving. That Yuu would be happy to take care of Grim full-time, if only he didn't have so many pesky responsibilities. He couldn’t communicate that to Grim in a way the cat would understand.

So, what could he do? Continue going to school? What if his behavior got worse in his desperation to get Yuu to notice him?

He pinched the bridge of his nose.

Fine. He’d take Grim to school with him. It’d been a while since he’d taken a pet to class, maybe no one would notice.

Idia noticed immediately.

“... you have an animal with you, don’t you?”

Yuu frowned. “What makes you think that?”

“Because of the way you’re holding your backpack,” Idia said. “You’re being too careful with it.”

Ah. This must be what people were talking about when they said ‘the morbid ordeal of being known’.

Yuu glared at him.

“You're a terrible actor. Now, let me see our son,” Idia joked.

“He’s not exactly photogenic, senpai. I took him in for a reason,” Yuu warned.

Idia waved off his concern.

It was with great reluctance that Yuu complied. He unzipped his backpack, and Idia leaned in close to see.

Idia stared at Grim. Grim stared at Idia.

A lot of expressions flicked over his senpai’s face.

“... why is he green?” Idia asked, eventually.

Yuu shrugged. “The internet said that it’s probably chemical exposure.”

“You’ve had him for, like, a month, though,” Idia said, his arms crossed over his chest, his expression troubled. “That should have started fading by now.”

That was a good point.

Yuu’s lips pressed into a thin line. “I dunno. He’s a weird case… for a lot of reasons. Think your parents would know anything about it?”

“They’re human doctors,” Idia sighed. “But, if you leave him with me, I can try showing him to them.”

Yuu hesitated. “I dunno, he’s pretty anxious when I’m not there.”

Idia worried his lip. “He could be contagious.”

“Then I don’t want him around Ortho-chan.”

“Shimura.”

Yuu didn’t know what to make of Idia's expression. He didn’t think he’d ever seen his senpai quite so serious.

A hand settled on his shoulder. “Just – listen to me – you really need to – fuck!”

Grim tried to snap at Idia’s hand, and it was only thanks to years of QTEs that Idia was able to move out of the way in time.

Yuu frowned down at Grim.

Who was glaring at Idia… and Yuu, too? Idia, Yuu could understand. Grim didn’t know him. But Yuu wasn’t sure what he was doing wrong… maybe Grim wasn’t comfortable in Yuu’s backpack. But it wasn’t like Yuu could openly carry him to class.

Or maybe Grim was just jealous and didn’t like someone else touching Yuu.

Yuu, frankly, had no idea. Grim had never lashed out like this before.

“I don’t think I can leave him with you,” Yuu muttered, scratching Grim behind the ears to calm him down.

Grim glanced at Idia. If Yuu didn't know better, he'd say the cat looked kind of smug.

Idia’s eyes narrowed, before he crossed his arms over his chest. Perhaps to protect his hands from Grim’s wrath.

“Fine, fine. It’s… probably not pressing, anyway, if he’s been like this for over a month already.”

They didn’t get much longer to talk about it, because their school came into view and Yuu had to stuff Grim out of sight. Idia promised to take Yuu out to an arcade that weekend, and Yuu had readily agreed. And then they went their separate ways.

They weren’t in the same class, after all.

Maybe, if they were, Idia could have helped him hide Grim.

Unfortunately for Yuu, he wasn’t quite capable of keeping his teachers from realizing that Yuu was harboring a fugitive. Not for long.

Grim had been quiet. But, alas, one of his classmates noticed Yuu’s backpack shifting every once in a while.

The bad part of being a ‘smart kid’ was that his class was made up almost entirely of fucking teacher's pets.

He was sent home.

It wasn’t this that made anxiety crawl up his throat.

No, it was because Yuu knew that the school was going to call his parents.

His time with Grim was about to come to a very abrupt end.

… dinner that night was awkward. No one wanted to bring it up, but the longer they went without saying anything the more tense things got.

“Bring it here,” his father said, finally, setting down his chopsticks.

Yuu, reluctantly, walked to his room and scooped Grim up, off the bed.

He presented his beloved cat to his parents.

His parents exchanged glances.

“Yuu, we can’t let you keep him,” his mom said. Not quite gentle, but considering this wasn’t the first time Yuu’d done this (nor would it be the last, he was sure), he wasn’t surprised that a little bit of frustration was leaking into her tone. “If he’s found, we’ll be kicked out.”

“He’s going to die soon, anyway,” Yuu said, hugging his cat closer to his chest. “He deserves a loving home until then.”

Grim was growling lowly. He, of course, couldn’t understand what they were saying, but even a cat could not miss the growing hostility in the room.

“It’s not that simple,” his father said.

Yuu worried his lip. He wasn’t stupid. Of course, he knew that things weren’t going to be that easy. But this was his cat, now. He’d named him, taken care of him for over a month. He wasn’t going to give up on Grim now –.

“We can let you be there, when they put him to sleep,” his mother offered.

“He’s getting better,” Yuu blurted. “Just – I can’t – what if –?”

“I thought he was ‘going to die soon, anyway’,” his father said.

Yuu’s eyes flicked to the side.

“Yuu… don’t make this harder than it has to be,” his father said, reaching out and gently tugging on one of his arms, trying to loosen his grip on the cat.

Grim sunk his teeth into his father’s hand.

His father jerked back in surprise. “Is the thing fer –?!”

He didn’t finish his sentence.

It wasn’t even the kind of slow trail-off that came when someone was distracted. It was sudden, as if his father had realized something mid-sentence.

Yuu peeked up to find his father standing there, completely motionless. A blank look on his face.

His skin was tinted green.

His mom looked just as confused by the development as Yuu was.

At some point, he had dropped Grim. Or maybe the cat had simply jumped out of his arms.

Yuu glanced down to look for him.

Only for his eyes to shoot right back up when his mother gave a strangled scream.

His father was tearing his mom’s throat out with his teeth.

Yuu fell out of his chair, barely even registering the pain flaring in his elbows. He scrambled away from – his dad was going insane, clearly, he needed –.

He fumbled his phone out of his pocket. The screen had cracked during his fall, but it still lit up when he clicked it on. Shaky hands rushed through calling the police, and he dragged his phone to his ear.

“Hello?” the person on the other side of the line said, sounding painfully bored.

“It’s – my dad – he’s… he’s gone insane – he’s eating her!” Yuu stammered, his eyes flicking around desperately for some kind of weapon. He could see the knife block, on a nearby counter, but could he really stab his own dad?

“He’s – what?” the receptionist said, flabbergasted.

If Yuu could breathe, he might have laughed.

His dad’s head turned to look at him, and Yuu swore he could feel his heart stop.

“Hello? Sir?” the person on the other end of the line asked.

Slowly, his father crawled off of his mom, still laying limp on the floor.

Awkward limbs that didn’t seem to move quite right, hands and feet that seemed unsure on the ground. His mouth was caked in blood. There was something stuck between his teeth. Glassy eyes stared at Yuu in a way that made him feel sick, because his father might have been one to enjoy dry humor, but he had never looked quite so empty before.

Yuu grabbed the overturned chair, holding it like some kind of shield as his – the something crawled toward him.

And then his mother started to move, too. Flopping over onto her stomach. Slowly rising, using the nearby counter to push herself up, like a toddler just learning the ropes of being a human.

Her neck was still bleeding sluggishly.

“Y-Yuu,” the thing inside his father said.

His mother made a gurgling sound, as if in agreement.

Yuu’s back hit the wall.

The things clearly weren’t used to their bodies. Could he make a break for it?

But Grim was still around somewhere, wasn’t he? He was supposed to protect the cat… but the cat had done this, hadn’t he?

He didn’t get enough time to think it over, because his mother lunged toward him.

Yuu hit her with the chair.

The chair shattered upon impact.

It didn’t even seem to register the pain.

It fell on top of him, taking his face into its clumsy hands, swiping its thumbs beneath his eyes. No amount of shoving at its chest was deterring it. It forced his head back.

Yuu pressed back further into the wall, trying to delay the inevitable.

He felt it tuck its head into the crook of his neck.

Yuu went very still.

Was it messing with him? Why was it not killing him?

His father’s body reached him, then, wrapping around one of his legs, clinging to him.

Yuu couldn’t move. Shouldn’t move. It didn’t seem aware that he was still alive. Maybe it was going by T-Rex rules! Maybe he was fine so long as they just forgot he wasn’t some really human-esque furniture!

Lips pressed against his neck.

It was short. A chaste peck.

Yuu retched and jerked away, tripping over his father’s body in his haste.

He was back on his feet in seconds, his heart pounding in his chest in time with his footsteps as he made a mad dash for his room.

His phone –.

Was a lost cause, tucked behind the thing inhabiting his father.

He slammed his bedroom door shut behind him, pressing back against it to keep it from opening, even as the monsters on the other side banged their fists against the wood.

He wouldn’t be able to keep them out for long. It was two fully-grown adults versus one scrawny teenager. His odds were terrible even if the two of them could die. Which, considering his mom had had her throat torn open, only to continue on as if nothing was amiss, he wasn’t sure they could.

So, they’d come in and get him and he’d become one of them and –.

His cat stood in the center of the room. Green fur glistened in the sunlight streaming through the windows. Its mouth was still dripping with his father’s blood.

Yuu’s breath caught in his throat.

It got closer and closer, and there was nothing Yuu could do. If he moved away from the door, then they would be able to get in. And they would have no trouble pinning him down, at least not in comparison to a cat. He could always just punt the thing, maybe.

It would only buy him a few seconds at most, and he wasn't sure making it mad was a good idea.

Blood dripped onto his shoe.

The anxiety that had been creeping up the back of his throat finally made its way to the surface. Yuu doubled over, throwing up the breakfast bar he’d managed to get down that morning before running to school.

God, was that really just a few hours ago?

He felt a paw settle on the back of his hand.

His next heave was completely dry, more of a gag than anything.

Yuu’s arms trembled beneath him, and that was all of the warning he got before he collapsed against the floor, just barely managing to avoid the puddle of his own sick.

The things were still pounding against his door. His heart thudded in time with every knock. Dully, Yuu thought that the things must not know how to open doors.

Not that it mattered, when there was one so close to him.

He watched the thing approach him. Slowly, warily, as if it were scared he’d run away or attack it if it got too close too quickly.

It crept its way closer, stepping gingerly over one of his hands, making its way over to his chest.

Yuu squeezed his eyes shut tight.

It didn’t bite him.

It settled itself down on his chest and started to purr.

Yuu stared at it, watching it rise and fall with every quick, panicked breath.

Slowly, shakily, he lifted a hand to scratch it behind the ears.

It leaned into his touch.

~

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Yuu can do it!

Part 78

First - Previous - Masterlist - TBC

Kuroki made his way into the mirror chamber. The place was blazing hot (especially to Kuroki, who had spent entirely too long in the Headmage’s freezing office), but everyone present seemed content with this. Which, Kuroki figured, made sense. The desert and savannah would be hot, and he was pretty sure he remembered Mexico being close to the equator… really, this was probably an ideal situation for this particular group.

... save for Enma. Enma looked like he was melting.

So, he told him, “You’re the only one who didn’t dance and you’re still sweating that much? Dude, you need to be more active.”

Enma raised an eyebrow at him. “Yeah? You should teach me your ways. I’ll make sure to wake you up early tomorrow so we can go on a run.”

Kuroki regretted everything.

“No thanks.”

“Whaaaat? Why not?” Enma said, grinning and throwing an arm around his shoulders. Kuroki shrieked, because Enma was sticky and sweaty and fucking gross. “It can be a bonding experience.”

Kuroki tried to push his smug, annoying face away.

In the meantime, Grim floated over to Ito. “That performance wasn’t as cool as it could have been – I would have made it way better – but… you guys still managed to do okay without me.”

Ito smiled softly. “Thanks, Grim-sama.”

“Well, obviously it was good, I was there,” said Leona.

“I did not say it was ‘good’!”

“You were the worst part of the performance. In case you’ve forgotten, our entire purpose was covering up just how terrible you were,” Jamil said, flatly.

“And my henchman did the best, for the record,” said Grim. “In fact! Enma did better than you did, and he wasn’t even performing!”

Leona clicked his tongue. “You’re biased.”

Enma grinned. “And you’re not?”

“No, I’m self-aware.”

Kuroki raised an eyebrow skeptically. He didn’t think anyone who had Overblotted should be allowed to say that.

Kalim was quick to defend a man in need: “I think you did great, Leona!”

Leona didn’t seem particularly happy that Kalim was the only person on his side. He should be — he had someone who was willingly agreeing with him, somehow, he should really take the win.

Because Ruggie certainly wasn’t going to give him one. “It’s okay, Kalim-san, you don’t have to sugarcoat it. You’re a kind soul, though.”

Kalim laughed, sounding slightly nervous, his eyes flicking to the side. And then he brightened up. “Vil! What’d you think of our show?”

Kuroki followed his gaze to where Vil Schoenheit was leaning in the doorway.

“Did it live up to your standards, your highness?” Leona asked, dryly.

Vil crossed his arms over his chest. “You earned a passing score. And after all that whining, too… I helped you reach your true potential and then some in just one day, isn’t that nice?”

Leona rolled his eyes.

Kuroki sidled his way behind Ito to protect himself from The Gays. Ito was A Gay, technically, he was pretty sure, but there were no women that they could be gay for, therefore they were the safest one here. “I hate this fucking school.”

“Same,” said Ito, sighing. “Should’ve gone to an all-girls school instead…”

Kuroki would prefer it if the four of them were homeschooled, but sure.

“– Ito-san?” said Vil.

Both of them looked up, very confused. Enma seemed amused. Whether this was because they had been caught not paying attention or whatever Vil had said, Kuroki could only hope to find out.

“Yeeeees?” said Ito.

“... can you sing?” Vil repeated.

Kuroki ducked to hide behind Ito in a vain attempt to hide his laughter from them.

Ito crossed their arms over their chest. “Hey, I’m not that bad.”

Leona and Ruggie, who had once had to listen to the Yuus scream (sorry, sing) for hours, shot Ito a vaguely amused look as they headed off, probably toward their dorm.

“For the record, I’d rather let you hunt me for sport than go through all of this again,” Leona drawled.

“I didn’t ask,” Vil said. “But I’d be happy to shoot you, if you’re really so willing.”

“Yeahyeahyeah, who cares, so about my pay…” said Ruggie, physically dragging Leona away.

Sweet! They forgot to drag Enma back to Savanaclaw with them!

Not that Enma had noticed yet. He seemed to be struggling to find a way to tell Ito that their singing was, at best, extremely flat and, at worst, reminiscent of a dying cat.

“I mean… you’re… not… good…” said Enma, delicately.

Ito pouted. “What’s it even matter?”

Vil sighed. “I was merely thinking ahead. The VDC is coming up, and if that’s what you all can accomplish in just one day, we’d have a real shot at beating RSA this year.”

The Yuus glanced at each other, in a kind of ‘do you know what he’s talking about?’ There were three collective shrugs.

And then Grim piped up and said: “It’s this huge singing-and-dancing-thingy that they do!”

The Yuus stared at Grim. He… knew something? That they didn’t? This was a new low. This one hurt.

“Yes, he’s… it’s… you don’t know…?” Vil cleared his throat, visibly taking a moment to compose himself. “The VDC is a part of the yearly Arcane Academy Culture Fair — a two-day festival with several contests. Think of it as a chance for people to show off what they learned in their culture clubs and art electives.”

(Kuroki grimaced. He knew about the Culture Fair, at least. Because his choir teacher never shut up about it. Professor Kaa had been talking about their upcoming ‘hypnotizing performance’ since the beginning of the year. Kuroki couldn't bring himself to care about it. He wouldn't even care if it was a ritual to actually hypnotize people… hell, he’d be glad if it was, because then he could wipe his performance right out of the audience’s memory!)

“The VDC is the main draw. It’s a worldwide song and dance competition,” Jamil said, his eyes narrowed thoughtfully. Because he was thinking really hard about the VDC, surely.

Grim nodded fervently. “I saw it on someone’s TV back – back before – I came here! It’s super cool!”

“You three really don’t know anything about it?” said Kalim, his eyes blown wide. “And here I was thinking that they showed it everywhere.”

“Our hometown is really small,” Kuroki shrugged. “And, like, cursed so no one can leave. Trust me, we’re just as shocked that all this happened as you are.”

“Ooooooh, is that why you can’t go home?” Kalim said.

“Yep, no one knows where we’re from,” Enma said. “Makes it hard to go back.”

Vil cleared his throat.

Oh, right, he was still here. And, possibly, uncomfortable with the heavy topic. Kuroki would be surprised if he could even tell which ‘Yuu’ was which. This was a lot of information to learn about people you could barely put a name to.

The fact that everyone at NRC was emotionally stunted probably didn’t help either.

“Sorry, senpai.” 

“No need to apologize,” said Vil, flashing an award-winning smile. “I suppose I’ll only need Viper-san’s number, then…”

Jamil handed his phone over to Vil so he could type his number in.

“You’re gonna do it, Jamil-senpai?” Ito asked, raising their eyebrows.

Kalim beamed. “We both are! It’ll be a great bonding experience, right, Jamil?”

“If you say so,” Jamil said, flatly, ignoring the person who was practically hanging off of one of his arms. “I merely have nothing better to do now that I’ve been partially relieved of my duties.”

“You have to babysit me,” Ito reminded him, grinning.

Jamil raised an eyebrow at them. “If you want us to supply you with alcohol, you have to behave.”

Ito’s grin dropped into a pout.

“Speaking of which,” Jamil said, taking his phone back from Vil with a tiny nod. “You’ve already gone way over your daily limit, friend-wise.”

Ito’s pout became much more real.

“Those were special circumstances!” Enma said.

Kalim beamed. “Yeah, don’t worry, we’re not unreasonable or anything, but it does mean we should get going soon.”

“Aw… but it’s just, like, an hour until curfew. And it’s a long trek up and down those stairs, I might as well just go with them, it’ll save everyone time…”

Ito trailed off. Kalim seemed unphased.

They clicked their tongue. “Fine, I’ll make dinner and then come back. Is anyone hungry for anything in particular?”

~

For the first few minutes, Kuroki wasn’t sure what had woken him up.

To be fair to him, his brain was working at half speed, because, again, he had only just woken up.

He shifted, reaching around blindly until he could pull their phone out from under their pillow. He squinted at the bright screen, trying to take in information despite his burning retinas.

5AM. Not an ungodly time of the night, but still not fun. Kill him.

(Please don’t.)

He sighed, pushing himself up to sit slowly, rubbing his eyes.

“CrowleyCrowleyCrowleyCrowleyCrowley…” Kuroki grumbled. If he had to be awake, then the ‘gracious’ Headmage should be kind enough to be awake, too.

It was then that he finally noticed Enma. Fast asleep, but mumbling under his breath. Clinging to the closest thing (read: Ito, who was, as always, passed out cold) like it was a lifeline. His face screwed up like he was in pain.

Fuck.

Kuroki liked to think he was decent at pattern recognition. And he had realized over the break that Enma always had nightmares right before things went to shit.

… actually, when Enma woke up from those nightmares, he was usually sore at best, and outright sick at worst. So, maybe, it was less ‘he got nightmares before things went to shit’ and more ‘he got sick right before things went to shit, and was prone to fever dreams’.

Whatever. Point is, it was a bad sign.

Hesitantly, he reached out and prodded at Enma’s face until his eyes fluttered open.

For a moment, Enma’s eyes darted around.

And then he seemed to realize what was going on. He groaned, long and slow, taking a moment to relax.

Kuroki pressed a hand against Enma’s forehead.

Yep, warm.

He made as if to pull his hand away, but Enma leaned into his touch, and that foiled all of Kuroki’s plans. Somehow. Don't ask. Mind your business.

He nudged Ito with his knee. Repeatedly. Finding a place right beneath their ribs and digging in to maximize their discomfort.

They were (relatively) quick to wake, for once. Maybe the combined discomfort of Enma using them as a stress ball and Kuroki‘s attempts to bore a hole into their side was enough. Perhaps they simply had a sixth sense for when they were needed. Frankly, both possibilities were equally likely.

Either way, they tried to sit up, tried to get their bearings… only to get dragged back down by Enma within seconds.

They blinked a few times, processing.

They looked at Kuroki.

”Save me,” said Ito.

Kuroki hesitated.

“Ecchan,” he said, gently brushing hair away from his face. “Are you gonna throw up?”

“Mmmm… maybe…”

“I’ll leave this one to you, Ito,” Kuroki said, giving them a salute even as he scrambled off of the bed. He promptly decided that wasn’t enough space and backed several steps away, as well.

Ito scowled. “I don’t like dealing with vomit either, yknow.”

“Yeah, but you don’t throw up at the sight of it,” Kuroki said. “Unless you want to clean up after two people.”

Ito sighed, long and slow. Then, reluctantly, they waved Kuroki off in favor of comforting Enma.

… partially, at least.

They did take the time to turn onto their side and slot themself beneath his chin so Enma could cuddle them in the way that was most comfortable for him.

They also took the time to nag him, though:

“That bite you got from Bucchi-senpai must’ve gotten infected,” they said. They clicked their tongue, lightly. “I told you you needed to disinfect it the second you got it, mouths are some of the dirtiest parts of the human body, and that’s not even considering he’s a yajugen, but nooooo.”

Enma grumbled incoherently and hid his face in their hair.

Ito huffed, but let the subject drop. For now.

Kuroki watched them settle in to sleep for a few seconds, before sighing and running his fingers through his hair.

Might as well get ready for the day…

~

Ah. This must be what Enma had had a premonition about.

Kuroki would like to add Vil Schoenheit to his already too-long list of enemies. And, yeah, maybe he should pick his battles more carefully... but, at the same time, this was important!

Because, now that Grim had remembered that the VDC existed, he was obsessed with it. Trying to convince him to join it, because apparently they would make a ‘great duo — no, band’. Because why shouldn’t Ito and Enma also get involved, without their knowledge or consent? And, hell, even if they were there and playing along with Grim’s idea, it wasn’t like it would work. Ito couldn’t sing, Kuroki couldn’t dance, and Enma and Grim couldn’t do either.

But never mind all of that pesky logic. They were going to be stars someday soon.

“I thought you were going to be the greatest mage the world’s ever seen,” Kuroki said. “You can’t change your career path now.”

He was, of course, bullshitting when he said this. He could have been right but, frankly, he had no idea how being a ghost worked. What were the Rules? Can you simply change your objective if it suits you better? It felt wrong, but, then again, the very existence of ghosts was a little counterintuitive and wrong.

Was he going to admit any of this aloud? No!

”I’m talented enough to do two things,” Grim sniffed.

Now how was Kuroki supposed to respond to that? It wasn’t like he was against it on principle or anything, he wasn’t deluded enough to think that they’d get in or anything, so he didn't mind auditioning for fun… but Not Getting In was exactly why he didn’t want to do it! If Grim auditioned and didn’t get the part, he’d be sad!

“Enma and Ito aren’t here?” Deuce asked, dropping into the chair beside him.

“Enma’s sick,” said Kuroki, jumping at the excuse to change the subject.

“Ooooooh,” said Deuce, nodding along sagely.

“My other henchmen would be on my side…” Grim grumbled.

Kuroki narrowed his eyes.

“What’s he going on about this time?” Ace said. He hovered by their desk, as if he was considering whether or not it was worth it to join their group today.

Grim sent Ace a glare, before, apparently, thinking better of it. He pointed at Kuroki. “Convince him to audition for the VDC with me!”

Ace raised an eyebrow. “Have you seen the prize money yet?”

Kuroki’s nose scrunched. “Ito’s actually getting paid minimum wage, now, and all of the Scarabia dorm’s food is bought and paid for by Kalim-senpai, so we’re not as desperate for money. And, even if we were, it’s not worth it. That shit’s on TV. I’m not embarrassing myself in front of millions for any amount of cash.”

Deuce nodded along. “And that’s if you get in at all. Which, let’s be honest – there are only two spots left, it’s not gonna happen.”

Kuroki wasn’t sure how to feel about Deuce being the only person on his side.

Broken clocks are right twice a day, perhaps?

Certainly, Kuroki couldn’t be the one in the wrong.

He cleared his throat, awkwardly.

“Besides. I’m busy making Crowley’s life Hell.”

He, idly, wondered whether the Headmaster had appreciated the plague of crickets he’d released into his office that morning.

(He hoped not. That would defeat the purpose.)

“I see, I see,” said Ace. “A noble cause.”

It was with a theatrical kind of reluctance that Ace sat down on Deuce’s other side.

Kuroki rolled his eyes. “Maybe you should audition.”

“I’m thinking about it,” Ace said. “Could be fun.”

“See!” Grim said, waving his paws around in wide gestures that had no real rhyme or reason. “It could be fun!”

“I’ll be you guys’ shoulder to cry on when you bomb,” Deuce said, solemnly… if you ignore the gleam of amusement in his eyes.

“Don’t be lame, Deuce,” Ace groaned.

“Henchman, come on!”

Kuroki sighed. “Grim…”

For the first time ever, Kuroki was glad to see Crewel. The man strode in just as the bell rang, as usual, and they were forced to pay attention to that, instead.

~

By the time that Kuroki’s shift at work ended, he was exhausted. Ito, Enma, and Grim were back in his room. He’d survived nearly an entire day without his emotional support friends. He deserved to run right to them.

He lingered in the kitchen, wondering if he should get something to-go...

This was, as he quickly realized, a mistake.

“Ah, Yuuya-san!” Azul called.

Kuroki made a mad dash for the door.

Jade scooped him up before he could escape. Where did he even come from? How did someone that tall sneak up on him?!

“That’s not very polite. Azul wishes to speak to you.”

“Enma’d be jealous if he saw you doing this,” Kuroki said. He may think Enma’s crush was ill-advised, but he would invoke it if it made Jade put him down.

Alas. Jade continued smiling thinly and decidedly did not return Kuroki to his beloved floor.

He faced Azul with the kind of resolve you would see in a man knowingly walking into a slaughterhouse.

Please don’t fire me. I’ll have to do the stupid VDC thing and I don’t wanna…

“Schoenheit-san asked me to give flyers to all of my Lounge performers,” Azul said. “If it helps motivate you, I can honestly say that you have a shot of getting in.”

Are you fucking kidding me?!

Kuroki glared at the piece of paper that had been all but shoved into his hands like it had personally insulted him. Because it had. Trust him on this – had he ever lied before?

“Thanks, Azul,” he said. “But I’d be more flattered if you weren’t only saying that to get rid of me.”

"I believe that you gaining financial independence would be beneficial to both of us."

Azul didn’t even bother to deny it.

Kuroki hated this stupid dorm.

At least Jade finally freed him.

He started off toward his room, the flyer crumpled in his fist. He needed to find a place to throw this away before he made it back to his room, lest the sight of it earn another round of pestering from Grim. Should he stop by the kitchens –?

He turned a corner and came face-to-face with a very bored Floyd Leech.

Who immediately lit up.

“Koebi-chan!”

He! Hated! This! Stupid! Dorm!

~

He closed and locked the door to his room behind himself. He’d managed to shake off Floyd by running to the library and sending Riddle the most pitiful look ever seen on a man (thank you, Riddle Rosehearts, your sacrifice will be remembered for generations to come), and slowly slid to the floor.

“Long day?” Ito asked.

“You have no idea,” Kuroki groaned, tipping his head back against the door.

Ito smiled wryly. “I have an idea.”

Kuroki glanced at Enma. Enma had cocooned both him and Ito in a blanket, with only their faces poking out. Grim was curled up on top of the cocoon, his tail just barely swishing back and forth.

It looked like they were having a good time to him.

“Did he throw up?”

“No, but he hasn’t let go all day. He’s so clingy when he’s sick. I swear, he’s only, like, one step above toddlers.”

Kuroki wasn’t sure he was seeing the issue here.

“Just let me have this,” Enma sulked.

Ito rolled their eyes, but they did stop complaining.

Kuroki crossed his arms over his chest. “Did he eat at all?”

“I made him some soup. He wouldn’t accept anything else.”

Okay. Great. It wasn’t particularly filling, but it was something, at least.

He glanced at Enma. He didn’t seem much better despite the sustenance.

“Should we take him to the infirmary?”

“Not happening. Apparently. I called the Headmaster for help, ‘cause I can’t carry Enma all the way to the infirmary on my own, and the Headmaster said that I should try and fix it myself, since I’m going to be working in the infirmary from now on. It'd be 'good practice',” Ito said, rolling their eyes.

“See, I told you Crowley’s a bitch.”

Ito’s eyebrows knit.

“When have I ever said that he wasn’t one?”

Kuroki frowned right back at them. “But… you like him, right?”

“Yeah? He’s cool.”

What wasn’t clicking?

“But – but he’s a bitch!”

“So are you,” Ito said, gently.

“True,” said Enma.

Kuroki scowled. “Go back to being sick.”

Enma gave his best impression of a kicked puppy.

… it was working.

Kuroki sighed, running his hand through his hair. “Alright, anything you want to eat, Enma?”

“I don’t know… can we get something delivered? I don’t wanna move,” Enma groaned.

“You don’t have to. I can go grab something –.”

Enma frowned. “No.”

“... ‘no’?” Kuroki repeated. He hadn’t thought that he’d asked a Yes or No question.

Slowly, Enma removed a hand from The Cocoon and reached for Kuroki.

Ah.

“Stop smiling, Kuroki, you don’t understand my pain,” Ito grumbled.

“I’m not smiling,” Kuroki said, schooling his face into something more neutral as he unplugged their phone.

He frowned at the millions of notifications.

Pretty much all of them were courtesy of ‘Slave owner????????’ and ‘I don't think I can beat you in a fight so kys for me’. Kalim and Jamil must not know where Ito was.

Well. That sounds like a problem for Future Kuroki.

Current Kuroki was hungry and was going to make ‘Alpha Male Podcaster’ bring him food.

He hummed as he navigated to their contacts, intent on bullying – no, guilting… that didn’t sound much better… politely asking – someone to bring them something to eat.

“Hey, Jack, can you do me a favor?”

~

Kuroki leaned against Enma’s side as he, somewhat reluctantly, read over the flyer Azul had given him. Grim would wake up, soon, and remember that he still wanted to be a part of the VDC. Which meant Kuroki needed to dissuade him, somehow.

Hopefully, the terms and conditions would be enough. Surely there was something here that Grim would dislike.

Unfortunately for him, there really didn’t seem to be anything bad. Maybe his time working under Azul had given him a skewed idea of what making a deal was like in this world...

Wait. Hold on. Kuroki had found some fine print. Restoration of his faith in humanity: canceled.

He squinted at the tiny text at the bottom of the page, small enough that he had originally thought it was a smudge:

‘All participants must attend a month-long training camp with their bandmates. Food and lodging will be provided.’

Lodging…

The people in the band… got to live together.

Nevermind what Kuroki had said earlier about his list of enemies. Vil Schoenheit was an amazing human being and Kuroki would love the opportunity to work with him!

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

( This post is starting to get some attention, so I'd appreciate it if you'd follow my art blog @katlyntheartist )

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Yuu can do it!

Part 77

First - Previous - Masterlist - Next

The plan was simple – put on the fashion show that the faeries so desperately wanted. Make it a show. Give it the works. Flashy outfits, performers dancing their way across the stage, a magic-fueled light show... make it the best thing that they’d ever seen.

And, while everyone is distracted by the Pretty Magic lighting up the sky, they would use just a little extra magic to swap out the magestone for a replica.

(Kuroki had asked why they had to distract the faeries at all, if they were just going to swap the stones over their head. Apparently, faeries were super sensitive to magic. Which was, perhaps, why Crowley ran the school – who better to find magical prodigies than a man who could sense magic from a mile away? It surely made more sense than the man somehow getting to the Headmaster position through his own merit.)

It wasn’t something that required a magicless student’s help, let alone three.

Kuroki could have been home free.

But here he was. Sitting in the Headmaster’s chair, scowling as he sewed millions of fake flowers onto everyone’s outfits. His fingers and wrists ached, and he wasn’t even close to being done.

And, even worse, Grim was sad because he couldn’t sleep in Kuroki’s lap!

He was never going to forgive Crowley. For anything. But especially not this.

Now, was this Crowley’s fault? Not really. Not directly, at least.

However, he was blaming him anyway.

He certainly couldn’t blame the people who had done this to him. If he tried to tell off Professor Crewel and Vil Schoenheit, he feared he might actually die. If not because they killed him, then because of the anxiety attack he would definitely have while confronting them.

And can you really blame him? They were intimidating. They were all… classy, put-together, attractive (probably)…

Terrifying, frankly.

Just look at how they’re yelling at everyone else!

“Your feet drag along the ground. Your posture is atrocious. Your head bobs when you walk. You swagger like some kind of ruffian… some prince you are. Are you sure you're not just the royal jester? Actually, no — saying that is an insult to jesters everywhere.”

Kuroki would have cried had any of these words been said to him.

But Vil wasn’t talking about him, so he snickered a little. “Can’t even walk...”

“You slouch just as much as I do,” Leona said. Surely because he was bitter about being told off in front of a bunch of people, all of whom looked like they were trying very hard not to make it too obvious they were laughing at him.

“This ain’t about me,” Kuroki said.

Leona took a calming breath.

“Shouldn’t have voted for me,” Kuroki added, just to be petty.

“Ooooookay!” Crowley cut in before a murder could take place. Maybe he didn’t want blood all over his fancy desk and chair. “Kuroki-san, you may be dismissed.”

Kuroki lit up. He all-but threw the clothes off of his lap, and only because he feared that Vil and Crewel might scream at him if he were to let them get too wrinkled. He hugged Grim to his chest, glancing back at Ito and Enma. “Alright, guys, let’s go.”

Ito and Enma didn’t hesitate to follow after him.

Leona grabbed Enma by the arm.

Enma glanced back at him.

Leona rolled his eyes, but let go pretty quickly.

Crowley, however, was quick to jump in front of the door. “Hey, hey, where are you two going?”

“I dunno,” said Ito, shrugging lazily. “Maybe someplace that’s not too cold… or too warm… oh! Crowley, can we go off campus for the day? I want to see the town…”

Crowley frowned. “You’re supposed to be helping.”

“But, Headmaster, surely, in a school as prestigious as this, we aren’t needed to solve these kinds of menial problems. Aren’t the mages that come out of here supposed to be brilliant minds?” Enma asked, so-very-polite if you ignored the clear undercurrent of disrespect in his tone.

The little balls of light in Crowley’s eyes shrunk to the size of pinpricks. Kuroki couldn’t decide whether this was an expression of fear, or if this was just what ‘narrowed eyes’ looked like on Crowley.

“There was a democratic vote, which you lost,” Kalim said, diplomatically.

“So stop bitching,” said Leona. Much less diplomatically.

“Do it or I’ll bite you,” said Ruggie.

Suddenly, Leona seemed like a Saint.

“Would I get an infection from that?” Ito asked.

Ruggie grinned. “Want to find out?”

No one, it seemed, was particularly eager to find out. Sure, they fucked around, but that didn’t mean that they wanted to deal with the consequences…

Reluctantly, Ito went back to Vil. Who immediately started lecturing Ito on their flakiness. Ito clearly wasn’t taking in a word of the guy’s rant, which just seemed to be pissing him off more. Frankly, Kuroki was shocked – and a little disappointed – that they hadn’t devolved into a catfight yet.

Enma, on the other side of the room, seemed perfectly content. Which made sense. He was one of two people who didn’t have to answer to Vil.

(The other person was Ruggie, who had been tasked with the actual theft part of the operation. His ‘practice’ was really just levitating things with wind magic. Which was, evidently, rather easy for him… either because he was a second year, or because he, perhaps, had practiced stealing things using magic before all of this happened. Because he was an overachiever like that.)

“You may still leave, Kuroki-san,” said Crowley.

Kuroki frowned, hugging Grim to his chest. “Well, if I left, who would annoy you?”

“That’s hardly an essential job.”

“No. It is.”

~

“As loath as I am to admit it, Leona could make an eye-catching main model if we leverage that air of smug superiority he gives off…” said Vil, squinting at Leona.

Leona wasn’t blushing, per se – or, if he was, his skin was too dark for it to be noticeable – but his ears were nearly flat against his head in what Kuroki could only assume was embarrassment.

Or maybe he was just pissed off and preparing to rip the guy’s throat out. It was hard to tell. The facial expressions are very similar.

“I suppose, if those three really work to balance out Kingscholar’s complete lack of talent, the fashion show might be a success…” Vil said. He sounded like he was talking to himself more than anything. Which, honestly, might have been worse. He wasn’t even trying to insult Leona.

“Are the three of us enough to distract from Leona-san?” Jamil asked.

“We can try our best!” said Kalim.

Ito turned their head to ‘cough’ into their hand.

Ruggie seemed to be getting secondhand embarrassment. “Sorry that our housewarden’s giving you so much trouble.”

“Hey, Leona, I learned how to walk on two legs pretty recently, so if you ever need any help, I can offer a few tips,” said Grim, smirking.

Being placed below Grim seemed to be Leona’s final straw. “You know what? I’m sick of your shit, I don’t have to do this –.”

“You’ll live,” said Crewel.

“And for what?” Leona drawled.

“Because you’ll look really cute in this outfit,” said Ito, leaning over Kuroki’s shoulder with a grin. “Can I braid some flowers in your hair, too? That’ll complete the look, I think.”

“No,” said Leona.

Ito pouted.

~

Enma left for approximately half an hour, and then came back with what looked to be ten bells, which he laid out on the Headmaster’s desk, beside the vial of faerie dust.

“... what are those?” Kuroki said. “Is your special interest bells now? Why?”

“They’re translators,” said Enma. “So we can talk to the tiny faeries.”

“... why are they shaped like that?”

“I thought it was because they sound like bells, but they said that it’s a cultural thing. The faerie that managed to bridge the gap between technology and magic was named ‘Tinkerbell’, so they shape everything they can into bells in her honor.”

(Kuroki nodded slowly. Since when has this world put the actual heroes of those Disney stories on a pedestal? Kuroki hadn’t known they could do that. But, hey, good for them, propaganda had been averted exactly one singular time.)

“How’d you get these?” said Ruggie. He picked one of the translators, peering at it, clearly trying to figure out if it was made out of real gold.

“Well, the faeries owed me,” Enma said, snatching the bell out of Ruggie’s hand immediately. “For… reasons.”

Ruggie frowned, opening his mouth. To ask what the ‘reasons’ were, or to protest the loss his new favorite shiny object, Kuroki would never know, because Enma was quick to cut him off:

“Anyways! They were happy to make us some.”

Kalim raised his hand. “Couldn’t you have asked them to swap the magestones out for us?”

“Dunno if they have that kind of power. They seemed like pretty average faeries to me,” said Enma, shrugging. “And, if I asked they’d pay more attention to the magestone, and it’d be even harder to steal. It was too risky.”

“You didn’t think to ask, did you?” Kuroki asked.

Enma flushed red and stomped on his foot. As all innocent people do.

~

The dance crew was… well, Kuroki wouldn’t call them successful.

Actually, he would. They’d looked fine to him.

Vil, apparently, disagreed.

“You two,” Vil said, pointing at Kalim and Jamil. “Are entirely out of sync.”

“I thought we were on beat,” Kalim said, frowning.

“You were,” Vil said, waving him off. “However, you aren’t meshing well together. You’re too boisterous, and Viper-san is too stiff. It makes the entire choreography seem – unbalanced. At this point, I fear even the Get Along Handcuffs might not be enough to get you two in sync…”

“... the what?” said Jamil.

“The Get Along Handcuffs,” Vil repeated, in the exact same ‘woe is me’ tone. As if he was the one suffering the most here. “I have never had an unsuccessful show for a reason, Viper-san… and I’m not starting today, either.”

The Get Along Handcuffs were almost exactly what they sounded like. They were four long pieces of rope binding each of Kalim and Jamil’s limbs together, forcing them to copy each other's movements. If one of Kalim’s arms went too far, Jamil’s body would jerk to follow after him. If Jamil failed to move one of his feet enough, Kalim would find himself completely off balance.

They hit the floor. A lot.

The floor was padded, slightly, thanks to the snow, but that definitely wasn’t enough to make it not hurt at all. And, honestly, their pride only ended up more wounded when, after finally getting back on their feet, they struggled to even brush the snow away thanks to the very predicament that had coated them in snow in the first place.

Frankly, the fact that Jamil didn’t attempt to strangle Kalim was a testament to his patience… or because the Get Along Handcuffs made it very hard for him to get his hands on Kalim. Take your pick, they’re both equally likely.

~

As for Ito…

“You,” said Vil.

Ito poked their head out from where they had definitely not been hiding behind Crowley’s cape, a scowl on their face.

“Why do you insist on not learning the steps?”

Ito thought this over.

“I don’t wanna.”

Vil was going to have an aneurysm. He probably would have already, if it wasn’t so damn cold in the office. Those faeries were saving lives, one slowed blood pressure reading at a time.

“I don’t care if you’re magicless, I will punch you in the face if you insist on being difficult,” Vil said.

“Is that problematic?” said Ito.

“No,” said Ruggie, glaring at Enma out of the corner of his eyes.

“Yes,” said Crowley.

“Yes and no,” said Leona. Seemingly just to be difficult.

Ito considered all of this, before rolling their eyes. “Listen. Dancing is about having fun. Making all these ‘steps’ defeats the purpose.”

Vil rolled his eyes right back at them. “That’s all fine when you’re dancing on your own, but the point here isn’t to have ‘fun’, it’s to be ‘good’.”

Once again, Kuroki wondered if this was going to escalate into a catfight.

Then Kalim and Jamil hit the ground again, successfully tearing everyone’s attention away from All That.

At least temporarily:

“You guys could compromise!” Kalim said, smiling despite the fact that he’d just Ate ShitTM. “Ito’s pretty good with people, right? Can they do crowdwork somehow?”

Vil and Ito looked thoughtful.

(A shudder of disgust ran through Kuroki. It was always weird when Kalim was even slightly competent.)

~

Have you ever heard someone talk about a ‘sad, wet cat of a man’?

As the room-full of students watched a sopping wet Leona trudge his way through his posture classes, they could not help but understand the true meaning of the phrase. Truly, there was nothing sadder than a wet cat.

Hair and clothes hanging in limp ringlets. Makeup running. The most sour expression ever seen on a human being.

But he was getting there.

Slowly, his posture was being corrected by sheer brute force. The gaps between each vase that toppled over and soaked him yet again became fewer and fewer. Say what you will about corporal punishment, but sometimes it works.

Also, it’s funny.

The door flung open.

“Leona-san, I’ve got your lunch –.”

The vase toppled over.

Ruggie and Leona stood there for a solid minute in silence.

“Uh, I’ll come back later,” said Ruggie, carefully closing the door again.

(They could hear him book it down the hallway immediately afterward.)

~

Kuroki quietly braided fake flowers into Ito’s hair. They hadn’t allowed anyone but Kuroki and Enma to do it, and Enma was still obsessing over faerie rules (could there really be that many?), so the responsibility fell to him and him alone.

Not that he particularly minded.

Ito sighed as Grim, once again, ran out of beads to put in their hair. They’d given him a very small section to braid, and a couple of beads to string throughout. Grim had used them all at the very top. And then he’d asked for more. Which Ito gave him, time and time again.

“Fine, but these are the last ones,” said Ito.

“You said that last time,” Kuroki murmured.

“Well, this time I mean it,” Ito said.

Kuroki strongly suspected this was less of a hard limit and more a ‘Grim is running out of hair to put beads on anyway’.

Was he going to point this out? No, not when Grim was clearly so pleased with himself.

Instead, he continued working. “When’d you learn how to dance?”

He hadn’t really expected an answer. They didn’t really… talk about anything from their own world.

(He didn’t have anything to miss, so he could only assume that it sucked.)

“After the pandemic, everyone was throwing parties all the time. Making up for lost time and all that, I guess. I figured it out sometime around there, I think. I dunno. I was, like, four, so…”

Kuroki hummed. “Did your parents teach you?”

“Nope,” they said. “They – uh – weren’t around much, after the pandemic. Their work took them out of the country a lot. We had a lot of tias – er… babysitters…? Nannies.”

He snickered. “What? Like Kalim-senpai?”

They flashed a grin. “Not that many, no. Just one for all of us. I only say ‘a lot’ because I… think I remember them changing a lot? I dunno, I haven’t really thought about it in a while. And they stopped coming around once I was old enough to take care of everyone on my own.”

They didn’t say any more, and Kuroki didn’t press.

Grim, on the other hand, wasn’t quite so tactful:

“When I’m big ‘n strong, I’ll make sure to take care of all my henchmen. So you don’t gotta worry about all that, here.”

Ito smiled, reaching out and giving Grim a tiny pat on the head. “I don’t mind ‘worrying’ about it. Someone has to. Might as well be –.”

“Me!” said Grim

“... of course, Grim-sama,” they said.

Kuroki cleared his throat. “Well… I’m a little jealous of you, really. I can’t dance for shit.”

“That’s why you can’t dance,” said Ito, immediately. “It’s all about confidence.”

Kuroki gave them a flat look. “And I’m the most confident person ever.”

Ito grinned. “I can teach you to dance, if you want.”

He hesitated. If asked, he’d say that he was just thinking back on when Ito tried to teach Grim to dance. That hadn’t gone very well.

But, really, he just… wasn’t particularly eager to make a fool of himself.

“I could probably bully Enma into doing it, too,” they said.

He nodded along immediately. He was very eager to watch Enma make a fool of himself.

~

Dress rehearsals are exactly like normal rehearsals, but they – get this – are dressed up.

Crazy, Kuroki knows.

Frankly, he suspected that they were more for the sake of the ‘costuming department’ than the performers. A couple of times, Crewel and Vil had to make quick alterations to the dancer’s outfits to make sure they had as much freedom of movement as they needed.

But, finally, they were as ready as they’d ever be.

Ito pulled a tablet out of a nearby cupboard and then handed it over to Kuroki.

“Here, now you can watch from the security cameras.”

“... there are cameras?” said Ruggie. He looked very nervous all of a sudden. Kuroki had a few guesses why, but he was no snitch (or, at least, he wasn’t a snitch when he didn’t have a reason to be).

“Don’t worry, I’m the only one who really checks them.”

“That’s the most worrying thing you could have said,” said Jamil.

Ito’s lips twitched into a smirk.

~

Enma gave them a ‘presentation’ on faeries. Supposedly, he had summarized everything he’d read. The presentation was half an hour long. And only because it was cut short by Leona:

“Isn’t all of this just ‘be polite Or Else’?”

Enma pouted. “Well… yeah, mostly. Outside of things like don’t owe them a debt, don’t outright lie to their faces (lie by omission, instead), and don’t give them your name… or pronouns, if you’re fond of them.”

And so, Enma’s presentation met an anticlimactic end. As all presentations do, unfortunately. Kuroki would like a whiteboard to explode after a presentation, just once. To keep things interesting, you know?

That being said, Leona’s days were numbered. How dare he make Enma feel bad? Only Kuroki was allowed to do that.

“Looks like my work here is done,” said Enma.

“You did very little,” said Jamil.

Enma flopped down onto the thin layer of snow on the floor, laying back, seemingly content to let himself be consumed by the cold now that he had completed his mission.

“Actually –,” said Crowley.

Enma groaned and turned onto his side, curling up into a ball.

Crowley ignored this. “I would like you to watch Bucchi-san to ensure that he does not cause any international incidents.”

It was hard to tell who was more offended by this – Ruggie or Enma. They were certainly both complaining just as much as each other.

Well, they had been until Ruggie, apparently, decided that the only way to get out of having a babysitter was to make sure there was no one around to babysit him.

Which is to say… he sunk his teeth into Enma’s shoulder.

Which, first of all, that’s counterproductive when dealing with Enma. Ruggie was just begging for Enma to develop a weird-as-hell crush on him.

Second of all, why the hell did Ruggie think he’d beat a guy twice his size in a fist-fight?

Third of all, and they only realized this once the two of them settled down…

They had accidentally proven that Enma could absolutely ‘babysit’ Ruggie.

~

A small faerie floated up to them the moment their group stepped through the door. Not because they looked particularly suspicious – Kuroki could only see them through the cameras, but he could tell, even from a distance, that they looked entirely relaxed. Even Kalim, who Kuroki wouldn’t think was a great actor considering his… Kalim-ness, looked at ease.

The point is: not one of them flinched. If Kuroki didn’t know better, he would have assumed that they were meant to be there.

The faeries stood no chance.

The faerie made a bunch of twinkling noises.

(The translators must not work when on the other side of a camera. Maybe because magic and tech interact weirdly…? He’d tell Enma later. The guy would have a field day theorizing about it.)

“We’re here on behalf of their father-figure,” said Enma. He motioned to Ito.

If you looked close enough, you could see the way both of them cringed just slightly while he said it.

Crowley wasn’t looking closely – Kuroki would have bitten him if he got within range – so he preened a little.

Was it worth it to stand up and bite him?

No. Grim was asleep in his lap. Moving was illegal.

Later, then.

The faerie made more bell noises. They were different than the first noises. Absently, Kuroki wondered if it was possible to learn to speak their language…

“He’s not here,” Ito said, placing a hand on their chest delicately, their smile absolutely forced, even if it might look real to those who didn’t know them. “But he told us to enjoy the Gala in his stead.”

More faerie sounds.

“We ate earlier, but we appreciate the offer,” said Kalim, smiling.

The faerie’s expression went from pleasant to amused, and it stepped aside – if you can really call it that when the thing was flying – to allow them to make their way further into the Gala.

And, really, it went off without a hitch.

The performances were dazzling, even when watching through a screen.

Fashion was always strange, but faeries took it to an entirely new level. Frankly, Kuroki wasn’t sure whether half of these things could even count as clothes. They felt more like costumes than anything – a hummingbird, a being of pure light (somehow). Was that one wearing a shoe? What? Why was it kinda Working It?

That wasn’t even getting into all of the magic. It was so potent that it was actually visible in the air as tiny, white lights that seemed to linger around whoever was closest.

And then there was Their performance. They had been scheduled to go last, a natural result of signing up as late as they had, and they had certainly been the best. Vil’s training had been brutal, but it had paid off.

Leona was the reason why they called that thing a catwalk. Jamil and Kalim had balanced each other perfectly, to the point where even their giddy smiles seemed to match. And Ito had made sure that people weren’t bored once the primary trio had passed them, teaching younger faeries dance moves, inviting faeries up on stage to dance with them, laughing and clapping along to the music so even the most left-footed of faeries felt free to participate…

The light show had been spectacular as well. Perhaps, in the privacy of his own head, Kuroki could admit that this was a school of talented mages, and it showed. Leona’s magic weaved through the air artfully, sprinkling delicate sand down on either side of the stage, making it look like their little performance troupe was little more than a mirage.

(It was so attention-drawing that Kuroki only barely remembered to watch and make sure Ruggie didn’t get caught stealing… and looked over just in time to watch as the boy subtly tucked the magestone into one of Enma’s jacket pockets.)

They reached the end of the catwalk just a moment later, and Leona sent a wave of fire along the edges of the stage, allowing the flames to reach as high as they could without burning the entire place down, stretching around the group of performers, curling in tight.

And then, all at once, it was gone.

As were Leona, Kalim, Jamil, and Ito.

All that remained of the performance was the faerie Ito had been dancing with just moments prior, standing alone on the stage, looking somewhat bemused.

The crowd erupted into thunderous applause.

It had to have been deafening for the four teens huddled beneath a secret trapdoor on the stage. And, aboveground, Ruggie and Enma were left to awkwardly excuse themselves from their conversation.

But that was all fine – because they had just successfully pulled off a grand performance and a heist in a day.

And, as the infiltration crew headed back toward the mirror room to fix the school’s air conditioning, they didn’t bother to hide their elation.

Leona had a swagger to his walk that was borne either out of spite for Vil or satisfaction at a job well done.

Ruggie was clearly coming down from a post-heist high, his footsteps light as he damn near bounced around, the magestone cradled gingerly in his hands.

Even Kalim and Jamil seemed to be having a pleasant conversation.

Enma laughed and threw an arm around Ito, his other hand waving in wide arcs as he rambled about all of the conversations he’d had with faeries while babysitting Ruggie. Ito nodded along, their expression soft as they listened to Enma talk about how faerie, apparently, only use food as decoration during events like this, and it actually works as a kind of intruder alert, and…

Kuroki tossed the tablet vaguely in the Headmaster’s direction (Crowley squeaked in fear and scrambled to catch it) so he could get comfortable in the man’s chair

“They’re safe,” he said.

Crowley managed to keep the tablet from shattering on the cold, unforgiving floor, and perhaps this was what earned a sigh of relief from the man.

Or, perhaps it was what he said next: “And without any property damage, this time!”

Kuroki rolled his eyes. The man’s priorities were skewed beyond –.

“It seems my theory was correct, you three are better when kept apart.”

Kuroki sat up so abruptly that Grim woke up, giving a groggy whine from his place in his lap. He couldn’t even bring himself to feel bad about it.

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

“Well, I’ve noticed that, when together, you three solve a lot of problems, but you create just as many as you solve. But your employers have very few negative things to say about you… in the employee sense, at least. So, I thought – why not separate you three and see if your performance improves?”

He, briefly, angled the tablet in a way that would let Kuroki see the screen. To show off his friends and classmates, all celebrating a job well done. As if to say ‘see the results for yourself’.

Kuroki’s fingers curled in Grim’s fur.

“Sir?”

“Yes?”

“You…” Kuroki started, only to trail off, his lips pressing into a thin line. He tipped his head back against the chair, his eyes on the ceiling. The snow had come to a stop, finally, though it hadn’t yet warmed enough for it all to melt. “This body is alive, right?”

“Strange phrasing, but yes.”

“And it’s mine?”

“It certainly seems that way,” said Crowley, motioning to Kuroki as if to say ‘you’re in it’.

Kuroki considered this. He was dead, back in his own world. But if this body was his… could he take it back with him? Could they really just leave?

They certainly couldn’t stay here.

“Crowley, is there really a way for us to go back home?”

“Yes,” said Crowley. “If you could be brought here, then you can be sent back home.”

“Are you really looking for it?”

Crowley didn’t answer.

Kuroki’s eyes fell back to the man’s face. “Fine then. I’ll figure it out myself. Because I’m getting Ito the fuck away from you.”

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Some idiot: "Why are you reading your own fic, that's shallow and stupid"

All fanfic writers and writers everywhere: "Who the fuck do you think I wrote it for?!"

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

You know when you get one of those readers who comments on every chapter of your fic, pointing out their favorite parts and quoting lines that really resonated with them?

Yeah, as a writer, this is an absolute gift. ❤️

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Maribat Awards 2024 Winners

We have some amazing winners listed below! Make sure to check them out, as well as their competition in the Nominations List or in the AO3 Collection! There were some very close calls, and several ties.

Thank you to everyone who voted or nominated.

Congratulations to all of our winners!

Art: Favourite Artist Gourins

Favourite FanArt https://www.tumblr.com/gourins/753732913747640320/hi-magic-user-in-gotham%E2%91%A4

Authors: Favourite Author of 2024 (Tie!) Otome_wandering StarWarsMum

Favourite Underrated Author Kuroko

Favourite Maribat Author of All Time (Any year) Otome_wandering

Favourite New Author StarWarsMum

Fics: Favourite Fic Heirs by otome_wandering

Favourite Underrated Fic (Tie!) if you really are the summer maybe stay until december by boldlyanxious I Don't Need Every Universe (When I Already Have You In This One) by Coffee

Favourite Maribat Fic of All Time (Any year) Heirs by otome_wandering

Ships: Favourite Daminette (Tie!) Heirs by otome_wandering The Batarang Thief by dragonbug

Favourite Jasonette Inconveniences, Cultists, and the Warehouse of Rejected Toys by Apathetic_Witch

Favourite Timari The Runaways by Am_I_really_a_writerhuh

Favourite Dickinette Bad Omens by newdog14

Favourite Rare Pair Rain Check by mochegato

Favourite Platonic (non-bio-family) Unkidnapped by boldlyanxious

Favourite Biological family AU (not just biodad!Bruce) (Tie!) Defy by joe_bobbi_o Kuroko's Maribat BioFamily September by Kuroko

Overall: Favourite Fluff Heirs by otome_wandering Adopting a neighbour (not exactly in the legal way) by Lady_on_paper

Favourite Angst the way i loved you by Undercover_fangirl

Favourite Hurt/Comfort The Forgotten by boldlyanxious

Favourite Comedy Rented, Not Bought by otome_wandering

Favourite One-Shot The Emotional Turmoil of Damian Wayne by otome_wandering

Favourite Multi-Chapter Heirs by otome_wandering

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Yuu can do it!

Part 76

First - Previous - Masterlist - Next

“Come on, it’s not so bad, Ito-chan! You like dancing!” Crowley said, smiling brightly. “I remember you having fun the other day, in Scarabia! And you certainly fit the theme!”

“Hm. Repeat that theme for me, real quick?” said Ito.

“... nnnnnno…?” Crowley said, slowly, sensing danger.

“Smart move. If you make me participate in the fucking exotic Faerie Gala, I’m going to kill myself in front of you, forever changing the trajectory of your life.”

“No,” snapped Enma.

Ito gave Enma some intense side eye, but eventually sighed and muttered a (very reluctant) apology.

Grim raised his paw. “What’s ‘exotic’ mean?”

“... don’t use that word anymore,” Kuroki said.

Grim covered his mouth, his eyes wide.

“Ito-chan,” Crowley said, slowly creeping closer to them. “What’s wrong with the word ‘exotic’?”

“I feel like the working class doesn’t murder shitty bosses anymore, what’s up with that?” Kuroki said.

Ito rubbed their temples. “Crowley, how old are you?”

“... why?”

“Because I’m trying to decide whether you’re old enough for this to be… understandable.”

The man tapped his fingers together, nervously.

Unfortunately for Kuroki, who had been prepared to throw popcorn at his ‘screen’ no matter what the ‘characters’ decided on, Crowley was saved by Leona:

He crossed his arms over his chest. “So… who here is ‘exotic’?”

A couple of people exchanged nervous glances. There was, of course, a ‘correct’ answer to this, in that there are definitely a couple of people in this room who were the intended subjects of this theme. But saying that aloud risked being called racist, and no one wanted to be politically incorrect. Especially not when the intended subjects were Leona Kingscholar and Kalim Al-Asim. Being racist to the prince of the Sunset Savannah and the heir to an extremely influential family in the Scalding Sands, to their faces, was not a smart play.

However, playing into those stereotypes would make it so they didn’t have to work.

A dilemma, indeed.

Crowley looked around, confused. He was smart enough to recognize that something had gone wrong, but dumb enough that he couldn’t figure out what that thing was.

He had time to piece it together, at least, because the Housewardens were certainly taking their sweet time. Trying their hardest to figure out how to get out of doing work without risking their reputations.

Silently, Kuroki and Enma met each other’s eyes, unsure. They were Japanese, and therefore sometimes considered ‘exotic’ by Western standards, but the Common language in this place was Japanese… still, in most isekais, Asian countries were called the ‘Far East’...

Were they going to ask this question aloud and draw attention to themselves? Absolutely not. However. It was an interesting thought experiment. Just… one that must remain a thought.

Azul cleared his throat. “Well, earlier, Kalim-san, didn’t you say you wanted to attend a Fairy Gala? This is your opportunity!”

Kalim’s smile was wearing dangerously thin. “I did say that, didn’t I? I’m – uh – not sure I want to go to this one, though.”

“Not even you are willing to help, Kalim-kun?” Crowley said, sounding like he might start crying all over again. The guy cried a lot for someone who didn’t have tear ducts.

Kalim scratched the back of his head. “Uh… I guess… if no one else is going to…”

Poor thing. This is why being a ‘good person’ isn’t worth all the hype.

“Excellent!” Crowley said, brightly. “Now, I may need another volunteer, as we can not expect Kalim-kun to carry this burden all by his lonesome!”

(He cast a sidelong glance Ito’s way. Ito threw a piece of popcorn at him in retaliation. Grim rushed to eat the piece of popcorn before it could hit the floor, but Kuroki stopped him… surely the stuff was tainted, now, regardless of the five-second rule.)

“Well, from – from a faeries’ point of view… the Sunset Savannah is largely unlivable, as most vegetation is unable to grow there, correct? Therefore…” Riddle trailed off into a mumble.

Leona’s eyes narrowed. “Repeat that? Didn’t catch that last part.”

This was a blatant lie. Leona had the best hearing out of anyone present. He was just daring Riddle to say what he was implying out loud, for everyone to hear.

Riddle flushed red, looking at his shoes. He decidedly did not repeat what he’d said.

“Well, if Kalim-san upsets the faeries in some way and they choose to plunge us into an eternal winter, then wouldn’t you be the one to suffer the most?” Vil asked. “Since yajugen get… lethargic during winter.”

“Oh, great, should we get Jack and Viper in here, too? Make it a set?” Leona said.

Vil Schoenheit, world-class supermodel, seemed to be sweating.

“I… can help,” said Vil, slowly. “I am, perhaps, too recognizable to infiltrate the Gala myself, but surely you will need help with costuming and… behavioral training.”

“Yeah, great, but not enough,” Leona said. “One of you white people has to come and you know it. Start drawing lots or voting each other off the island or whatever. We’ll wait.”

“Azul’s a merman,” said Kuroki. “That’s got to be ‘exotic’ enough for faeries, right?”

Azul’s face did a complicated twist, before he turned to Kuroki, smiling. “I believe you’ve forgotten something, Yuuya-san: you’re a Housewarden, too.”

Oh fuck.

“Well then,” Riddle said. “I suppose we should hold a vote. All in favor of Kuroki-san being sent in?”

Kuroki’s eyes narrowed. “Hey, why is it just us –?”

Azul raised his hand. As did Leona. And Vil and Idia (the opportunists…).

That was four out of the seven Housewardens present. Who knew there would be actual downsides to making enemies at every turn?!

Kuroki pressed his face into his hands. “Am I allowed to joke about killing myself, Enma?”

Enma thought about it. “No.”

“Shit.”

If Crowley had asked him to do this, then Kuroki would have said no. Without even a second’s hesitation. However, he had been democratically elected for the job, which made it way harder to disagree.

Of course, he was still going to try.

Kuroki lifted his head to see the Housewardens who hadn’t been roped into this shitshow slowly sidle out of the room.

He grabbed Azul before he could make his own great escape.

“I’m not doing something that will help Crowley of all people. I’m on strike. Azul, you’re up.”

“You lost fair and square, Yuuya-san,” Azul said, so smug. “And, surely, an alien like yourself fits the theme more.”

“Know what? Enma’s right, I shouldn’t kill myself. That won’t solve the problem. I should kill other people, instead.”

Enma flashed a thumbs-up. Sweet. The gun was, probably, somewhere in this room, he just needed to find it…

“You three are psychopaths. You know that, right?” Azul said.

They merely blinked back at him, entirely content with his baseless accusation. He could be wrong, it wasn’t a crime.

Azul looked at Grim. “You are in danger. If you sign a contract with me, I’ll be happy to help you get away from them –.”

“You’re friends with Jade and Floyd Leech.”

“... fair point.”

“Besides, they’re my familiars. If I want them to act nicer, I’ll just tell them that,” Grim said.

Azul raised an eyebrow skeptically. “You have control over them, huh?”

“Sure do, I just don’t see any reason to use it,” Grim sniffed.

Kuroki bit his lip to hide his smile. Grim was so cute. The fact that he couldn’t tell the monster this without him taking offense was a crime.

His darling monster’s cuteness was almost enough for Kuroki to forget that he had been voluntold to be a part of the heist.

Almost.

He slumped against Enma’s side.

Enma slung an arm around his shoulders lazily. “Don’t worry, I’ll do it for you.”

Kuroki’s eyes widened. “Wait, really?”

“Of course. Anything for my ‘little brother’.”

Enma was Kuroki’s little brother, actually, but Kuroki wasn’t going to point this out when Enma was doing him a solid.

Though he suspected Enma might have ulterior motives, regardless:

“... you want to see the faeries.”

“I want to see the faeries,” Enma agreed, easily enough. “And I’ve already got the faerie dust on me, anyway, might as well.”

Kuroki snickered, running his fingers through his hair. “How long do you think it’ll take Ito to break?”

They watched Ito pelt a very confused and distressed Crowley with popcorn.

“Five minutes, tops,” said Enma. “The Headmaster is pathetic, and genuinely seems to not understand what he’s done wrong. There’s no way they’ll stay mad at him for long.”

Kuroki sighed, turning and pressing his face into Enma’s shoulder. “Ughhhhhhh… don’t crush my dreams…”

“You asked!”

It, in fact, took Ito three and a half minutes before Ito groaned and sunk to the floor, defeated. Kalim nudged their side with his foot a few times, until they flopped onto their back and said “Fiiiiiine.”

Crowley still looked confused, but he brightened up now that yet another person had agreed to help him.

Kuroki started throwing things at Crowley in Ito’s stead.

~

“Leave him alone for five seconds for a Housewarden meeting and he gets dragged into some bullshit…”

The door flung open, revealing a very tired Jamil.

Ever since his Overblot, Jamil had let his exasperation with the world show far more frequently.

(This was, objectively, a good thing. If not because it was a sign of him being more open, then at least because it fed Kuroki’s schadenfreude.)

No one was particularly happy to see Jamil, either. The feeling was very much mutual.

“Really should have called in Jack,” Leona groused. But he was always annoyed for some reason or another, so this wasn’t a huge deal.

No, the problem was that even Kalim seemed a little bit worn down, giving a halfhearted, “Hey, Jamil.”

Jamil’s eyes narrowed, and he turned to look at Enma and Kuroki.

“What did you do to him?”

“Why does everyone always think we’ve done something?” Enma frowned.

“Because you usually have done something,” said Leona.

“Ohhhhh, right, right, carry on, senpai,” said Enma, dryly.

Kuroki jerked his chin to point at the Headmaster and Ito.

(He’d use his hands, but Grim was asleep in his lap and therefore it was vitally important that Kuroki kept petting him.)

“This one’s not our fault. It’s his.”

Ito had been trying to explain to Crowley why you can’t just call people ‘exotic’ for the better part of ten minutes, and their patience was wearing thin once again.

“Ito?” Jamil called.

Ito glanced over and flashed a wave, seeming almost relieved to have an excuse to think about something else for a few seconds. “Yeah?”

“What did he do?”

Nope, same topic. Unfortunately.

“He’s old,” Ito shrugged.

Crowley’s mouth dropped open in offense.

For a second, Jamil seemed confused, because he’s old wasn’t much in the way of explaining things… but then realization sparkled in his eyes.

“Ah, he said something insensitive?” Jamil said. He cast a glance around, at the specific collection of people in the room. “... racially insensitive?”

“Yeah,” said Ito.

“I did?!” Crowley said, aghast.

Ito pinched the bridge of their nose. “Mátame.”

“Saying you want to kill yourself in Spanish doesn’t make it better,” Enma said.

“That’s not what I said.”

Enma raised an eyebrow at them. “Okay, then what did you say?”

Ito crossed their arms over their chest.

Jamil sighed. “Take your meds.”

“Aw, man…”

Crowley raised his hand. “I still don’t understand.”

“Damn it!”

~

“You got dragged into this, too, Ruggie?” Enma asked.

Ruggie sent Enma a glare out of the corner of his eyes, but still lifted his hands in a vague shrug. “Leona-san pays me, what can I say?”

“How much does he pay you?” Kuroki asked.

“... one thaumark per hour. Literally nothing. Don’t you dare try to take my job,” Ruggie said. “I will kill Enma, don’t test me.”

Enma blinked. “Why am I being dragged into this?”

“You pushed me down the fucking stairs!”

“Happens to the best of us,” said Enma, shrugging.

Ruggie looked like was tempted to kill Enma now, regardless of whether Kuroki tried to steal his job.

~

Their ‘infiltration crew’ had been near each other for approximately five minutes, and yet, somehow, they were already at each other’s throats.

Frankly, it should be considered a skill at this point, the speed at which people at NRC can start a fight.

“I want to swap Yuus,” Ruggie snapped. “How come yours is all sweet and well-behaved?!”

Jamil scoffed. “They are hardly either of those things. Need I remind you that they cried for seven hours just to make us cave to their demands?”

“Okay, well, mine pushed me down the fucking stairs?!”

“Get over it, Ruggie, the bit is getting old,” Enma said.

“You little –!”

“Also, I nearly shot you, like, a few months ago?” added Ito, seeming very confused as to why they had somehow become the Yuu people preferred.

“All three of you did that! If I have to choose between three psychopaths, I’m obviously going to choose the most ‘normal’ one!”

“Oh, right,” said Ito. “We did do that, yeah.”

“Good times,” said Kuroki. A little sulkily. He had tried to use the ten minutes where Ito explained exoticism, xenophobia, and other similar topics to Crowley to look for his old gun… unfortunately, he couldn’t find it. There was a locked safe beneath Crowley’s desk, but Kuroki hadn’t convinced Deuce to teach him how to pick locks yet (an oversight on his part), and he was pretty sure the Headmaster would notice if he tried to get the thing open by force.

He did, however, find a bottle of wine in one of the desk’s drawers. According to the label, it was super old. Which, he was pretty sure, was a good thing?

He should steal it.

For spite reasons. He hated the taste of alcohol. No, he just needed to hit the guy where it hurts – his wallet.

Maybe Ito would like it?

No, Ito was too chummy with the Headmaster. And Jamil. No alcohol for them. Clearly, they didn’t need even more ways to self-destruct.

Kuroki would have to pour this out somewhere…

“Why are you all assuming that Ito is behaving because of something intrinsic about them?” Kalim asked, frowning.

“I think that should be obvious,” Leona said, flatly.

“You just need to negotiate with them,” said Kalim, smiling. “They aren’t animals, y’know! They’re pretty reasonable… most of the time!”

Damn, not even Kalim was able to say that they were always reasonable.

Kuroki decided he’d rather be offended than introspective.

“Ito, you made a deal with the enemy?” Enma asked, only half-joking.

Ito shrugged. “It was either that or I start stabbing people.”

“Um?” said Jamil.

“Don’t worry, I don’t want to go to jail, so that was a last resort kinda thing.”

Jamil still looked a little worried.

“Reasonable, huh?” said Ruggie.

Kalim scratched his cheek awkwardly. “Well, I did say ‘most of the time’!”

“Wait, what deal did you make?” Leona asked, his eyes flicking to Enma.

Kalim smiled. “We’re just trying to make them less dependent on each other, right? They can still be friends. Which means they should be able to hang out like friends do – during classes and lunch and all that, but once school ends for the day they have to hang out with other people. And they can only hang out for three hours a day on weekends.”

“... perhaps Kalim-kun is the true beast tamer here,” said Crowley.

“That doesn’t make sense,” said Leona, frowning. “They don’t get anything. They wouldn’t agree to that.”

Kalim cast a glance Ito’s way. “I did make a concession. They’re allowed to hang out from 20:00 to 08:00. If they can’t sleep apart –.”

“We can, we just don’t want to,” grumbled Enma.

“Right, of course!” Kalim agreed, just a little too quickly for it to feel entirely genuine. “I figured that, if they don’t want to sleep apart, then I think we should let them, at least for now. They’ll have trouble sleeping otherwise, right? And that’ll just make them more stressed and – probably – desperate to hang out together. Which is the opposite of what we want!”

Dully, Kuroki wondered if any of this was really Kalim’s idea.

The thing about Ito’s deal was that… it wasn’t all that different from the way they usually lived. They had work, after all, and their schedules didn’t line up perfectly. Enma and Ito’s jobs started earlier than Kuroki’s, and Kuroki’s ended later. Save for ‘special occasions’ (read: when everything went to shit) where Enma and Kuroki took off work to help Ito with whatever Crowley had dragged them into this time, they honestly didn’t get much time together. At most, they were losing an hour or two per day.

But it seemed like Ito was giving up a lot, because the people at their school were stunted socially and emotionally and therefore assumed that, if they were openly affectionate, they must be attached at the hip at all hours of the day.

And, of course, it would only last until everyone gave up in a week or two, anyway.

Basically, they had almost nothing to lose by taking the deal.

(Based on the look Enma threw Leona when he dared to glance his way, Kuroki figured that a group consensus wasn’t possible. He supposed there was one thing to lose in this deal – their pride.)

“... oh! And I have to give them some alcohol, every Saturday and Sunday, to take the edge off.”

“I can’t believe you sold us out for alcohol,” Kuroki teased.

Ito grinned. “I’m making the best of a bad situation.”

Crowley frowned. “You’re not old enough to drink, yet.”

“I will be in, like, a week…ish!”

“A month and a half,” Crowley and Kuroki corrected them, at the same time.

They looked at each other, disgusted. Kuroki threw the wine bottle at him, pleased when it slammed against the wall and shattered into a million pieces, probably-expensive wine dripping onto the floor. Crowley fell to his knees in despair.

The balance had been restored. Thank god.

His eyes followed the wine as it trailed its way to the floor. The wine stained the thin layer of snow on the ground a deep red. It wasn’t quite as eye-catching as snow that was tainted with blood. The color was similar, but it didn’t draw his attention in the same, pressing way. He wondered, vaguely, why it was different. Maybe the mere knowledge that it wasn’t actually blood was enough to settle his brain?

Still, it wasn’t exactly pleasant imagery.

Crowley was screeching about how he had been saving the wine for ‘a special occasion’, but it was little more than ringing in his ears.

Kuroki ran his fingers through his hair and rolled his eyes skyward.

“Listen, if we get this done, then we can all go back to pretending that other dorms don’t exist. Doesn’t that sound fun?”

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Unreliable Narrator Trio

Yuu can do it kids my babies

(picrew used)

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Since fish don’t really blink, I like to imagine that mermen don’t (naturally) blink, either.

Azul and Jade both learn to blink over time for the sake of politeness, but they still forget sometimes. When they’re particularly invested in something or when they’re trying to intimidate humans, they’ll just… stop.

Floyd, on the other hand, doesn’t bother with it. He doesn’t see the point. Everyone around him is constantly thinking “BLINK MOTHERFUCKER”.

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

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[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Day 5

This a little unique prompt but it's good

Marinettes love language is stalking like she needs to know everything about someone so she can love every part of them even if it makes her a little jealous sometimes.

Really just want fics about Marinette stalking person b and then explaining to c "don't worry that's my girlfriend she means well" and never full explain why

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Yuu can do it!

Part 75

First - Previous - Masterlist - Next

“You know what happened?” Riddle asked, frowning slightly.

Enma smiled. “Think so.”

“Care to enlighten us?” Azul said.

“Not for free!”

Several people looked like they wanted to throttle Enma for daring to have good business sense.

“How about we come back to them!” Kalim said, his hands on his hips. “No harm in trying to figure it out ourselves, right?”

Now everyone was glaring at Kalim. Yuus included. Kalim, being Kalim, didn’t seem to notice.

Leona tilted his head to the side. “I’d be down to let the freaks hang out together again. They’re gonna do it anyway, it’s a pain to try to keep them apart, might as well end this now. Before they actually start retaliating.”

Azul nodded along. “I agree. However, they currently have no place to stay.”

“That didn’t stop you from making us homeless two months ago,” Kuroki muttered, bitterly.

Ito and Enma gave him twin incredulous looks. Which was fair. That kind of sounded like he was advocating for them to start a third homelessness arc. He, wisely, decided to shut up.

“We could give them to Schoenheit. They’re renovating the dorm because of him and his thing, so it should be his problem,” said Leona, waving a hand vaguely.

The Yuus narrowed in on Vil Schoenheit. So this was all his fault, then?

Vil rested his hands on his hips. “I hardly have the time to take care of three overgrown potatoes.”

“Ex-fucking-scuse me?” Ito said.

Enma grabbed them by the arm before they could punch a world-class supermodel in the face. They would get sued So Fast, and therefore it was vital that they did not do that.

“Kuroki, take Ito on a walk for a sec?” Enma asked.

Ito rolled their eyes, muttering that they were “Not a dog”, but, when Kuroki tugged at their arm insistently, they allowed themself to be dragged out the door.

And, though they would never admit to this aloud, they did calm down after a few laps of the hallway.

You want to know who did not calm down? Literally anyone else.

Kuroki opened the door to Crowley’s office and was forced to duck under a stray spell. Because, apparently, everyone was fighting now. Throwing spells and accusations in equal measure.

“The stolen object is a magestone that supplies a type of magical power that fairies favor. Wouldn't it follow, then, that the fairies would be our first suspects? As I recall, there's a fae that’s supposed to be here right now, and yet we can’t seem to get in contact with him.”

Azul had a point.

Or, at least, he seemed to have a point, until the Ignihyde housewarden pointed out that, “Please, Draconia is way too OP to bother stealing something like that. It’s like a drop in the bucket for him, mana-wise. I bet you have it, Azul-shi, and you’re just waiting to sell it to the highest bidder.”

Which, first of all, that guy could talk?! Since when?!

Second of all, Kuroki could see that happening. Vividly.

“Maybe the tyrant over there needs a pretty rock for one of his little tea parties,” Leona said.

Vil and Riddle both scoffed. Leona had been only looking at Riddle, but the fact that Vil had taken issue with that sentence was slightly suspicious.

“You don’t even believe what you're saying!” Riddle snapped.

“You can’t prove that,” Leona said, shrugging, entirely nonchalant.

Enma, who had otherwise been watching things go down with the rapt attention of someone just barely refraining from chanting ‘fight, fight, fight’, seemed to realize that he needed to abandon ship the moment Riddle's face started reddening. He rushed out from behind the cover he’d been taking behind the Headmaster’s overturned desk and ducked out the door, slamming it shut behind himself.

(Kuroki was pretty sure he heard the Ignihyde dormhead scream as he was locked inside.)

The Yuus looked at each other.

“Anyone in the mood for breakfast?” Ito suggested, lightly.

Enma ran his fingers through his hair. “Sure. They can come get us when they’re done.”

“We should go pick up Grim, anyway,” Kuroki said, stretching his arms above his head lazily. “Lucky him, missing out on all this shit by being literally impossible to wake up half the time.”

Ito sighed. “If only I was slightly better at ignoring being beat over the head multiple times…”

“I believe in you,” said Kuroki, patting them on the shoulder.

“Don’t encourage that,” Enma groaned.

“... oh, good point. Ito, please don’t. You’ll, like, die. Probably.”

Ito opened their mouth.

Enma cuffed them over the back of the head before they could get a word out.

Ito sulked.

~

In the end, the Yuus had a relatively peaceful breakfast, all things considered. Most of the Octavinelle students were camping out in their rooms, desperately clinging to their fans, so the kitchen was pretty much empty. Kitchens run warm on the best of days, thanks to all of the machinery, so it wasn’t all that surprising that everyone was avoiding it like the plague.

The Yuus, who had just spent the entire break in a desert, were relatively fine.

Ito had taken the opportunity to complain about every single aspect of the Scarabia dorm’s uniform, regardless. Apparently, they had problems with everything – from the ‘Jesus sandals’ to the ‘Guy Fieri pants’ to the ‘fucking caution tape belts’. Their opinions were strong. And, as far as Kuroki could tell, nonsensical. What did any of that even mean?

But, hey, it didn’t seem like Ito was going to abandon them to join Scarabia anytime soon, so he wasn’t going to complain.

Grim had finished his food already, and was playing with his silverware to entertain himself. He was reenacting some sort of great war, from the looks of things. His knife lay among the fallen. Enma seemed torn between stopping him and allowing their darling baby to have his fun.

“Do you really know what happened to their weird stone?” Kuroki asked.

Enma didn't seem fooled by Kuroki's attempt at changing the subject, but he still indulged him: “Yeah. I was coming over to sleep, and then I realized that I should probably pop by Ramshackle to check for Tsunotarou. Needed to tell him I might not be around for a while, y’know?”

“You guys are getting close, hm?” Kuroki said.

Enma snickered. “You have nothing to be jealous of.”

“I’m not –.”

“He doesn’t even come in for tea when I try to invite him to be polite. I think he just treats me like… I dunno. A sponge for his infodumps about old architecture.”

Kuroki narrowed his eyes at Enma. He wasn’t sure whether he wanted to let the ‘jealous’ comment go, yet.

Ito, however, was not the one being insulted, and therefore was entirely content to move the conversation past this: “So, you went out to meet ‘Tsunotarou’, and then what?”

“Well, I saw him. We chatted for a bit while he walked me back to the mirror room. But then we saw a couple of faeries carrying a magestone. They were really struggling to carry it, so I offered to help them, and we took it – places. After that, I came here to sleep.”

Ito tipped their head to the side thoughtfully.

“Oh shit, we really are involved in every bad thing that happens on campus,” Kuroki said.

“Only on a technicality,” Ito shrugged. “They would have stolen it regardless of Enma’s help, I’m pretty sure.”

“I’m not saying that as a bad thing. Anything that makes the Headmaster’s life harder is great in my book.”

Ito rolled their eyes. “He’s not that bad.”

“He literally doesn’t even pay you minimum wage,” Kuroki said.

“That’s a common practice,” Ito shrugged, way too calm. “If a person is somewhere illegally, and rely on their employer in some way for food, shelter, citizenship, etcetera etcetera… most of the time, the employer will take advantage of that.”

“Doesn’t make it a good thing,” Enma pointed out.

Ito nodded. “I agree. But it’s not like it’s all that shocking that he’s not a great employer… and, besides, I’ve known he hasn’t been paying me a fair wage for a while. I do the guy’s taxes for him, I know the law. I’ve had time to get used to it.”

Kuroki scowled. Grim was sneaking his way closer to Ito's plate while they were distracted, but he didn’t feel compelled to tell them this. Apparently, they didn’t mind wage theft, so why should they care about their food being stolen right out from under them?

“Besides, he can argue that he gives us a place to stay for free, which makes up for the loss of revenue and then some.” They waved their chopsticks vaguely. “It is what it is.”

“Ito-chan!” a voice wailed.

“Nevermind, I hate him,” Ito said, their expression souring as Crowley flung himself on top of them dramatically, sobbing openly. They looked at their chopsticks, contemplatively, as if considering shoving them into Crowley’s eyes.

Kuroki wasn’t a religious man, but he was praying for a miracle here.

They slowly, reluctantly, set down their chopsticks and lifted their hand to pat Crowley on the top of the head. “There, there,” they said, tonelessly.

See, this is why he wasn’t religious. It never works out for him.

“Ito-chan, you’re supposed to help me,” Crowley almost whined.

Ito hummed. “You don’t pay me enough to deal with all of this.”

“I just gave you a raise…” Crowley whined. Wow, he had given up that pretense immediately.

“You’re still paying them pennies,” Enma said.

There was a beat of silence. Crowley opened and closed his mouth a few times, as if he really wanted to argue, but couldn’t. In the end, he gave up with a sigh and squeezed Ito tighter.

“I’m renovating your dorm…” he said, sulkily. “Is that not enough…?”

“You’re renovating Ramshackle because of Schoenheit-senpai’s thing, not for us,” Kuroki said.

“Tch,” said Crowley.

Enma and Kuroki’s mouths dropped open. That was so – rude! Even if Crowely was never a particularly respectable educator, it was still jarring to hear from an adult.

Ito didn’t seem all that surprised, either. Just how often was Crowley like this? Could Kuroki hate him any more than he already did? Because the guy was really trying to set a new record, here.

They looked at Crowley for a minute, before sighing. “Pay me minimum wage and I’ll tell you where the magestone is.”

Crowley was crying again.

Kuroki and Enma were feeling much the same.

“But – but – my money!”

“Just cancel one of your ‘business trips’.”

“Fine…” Crowley said, his wings drooping sadly. “But you’ll have to help me in the infirmary.”

“I can’t brew potions.”

“I’ll do the magical aspects, I simply need help with the more… day-to-day injuries.”

Ito thought this over, before shrugging and holding their hand out for Crowley to shake. The man lurched forward to shake it immediately.

Ito went back to their food.

Or, at least, they tried to. Grim had eaten it all while they were distracted. Their shoulders slumped.

“I thought you guys were on strike,” said Grim, quickly.

“Yeah, Ito, don’t be a scab,” Kuroki said.

Ito pinched the bridge of their nose. “Think about it this way – I don’t think he would have gone too far out of his way to help, so the culprits are probably somewhere on campus. They’re going to figure out where the magestone is, sooner rather than later. We might as well get what we can out of this.”

“But what we want to get is our right to be in the same dorm again,” Enma huffed.

“You heard them this morning. They’re on the verge of giving up on the whole thing, it'd be a waste of leverage,” Ito shrugged. “And it’s not like we haven’t found a way to stick together, anyway.”

Crowley frowned. “You have?”

Ito rolled their eyes. “You know exactly how effective Being Annoying is.”

The little lights in Crowley’s eyes narrowed just slightly at being insulted to his face, but it seemed he couldn’t find it in himself to argue when he was literally draped half on top of Ito for the sake of begging.

Faeries can’t lie, Ito had said, a while back.

It seemed they were right.

Hm…

Kuroki wasn’t sure how he could use this in his murder attempts, but he would find a way!

His resolve was only further renewed when Crowley picked up Ito and seemed to attempt to fucking steal them. He wasn't even being subtle about it! What the fuck?!

~

Kuroki and Enma were definitely not sulking as the Housewardens, Ito, and Crowley crept closer to the Botanical Garden.

Apparently, Leona had gotten sick of the fight and decided to hide out in one of his usual haunts, only to find that there were already quite a lot of people there.

Ito had been right to agree to help when they had. But had that ever stopped a Yuu from being petty? Absolutely not. They had their pride, thank you very much.

(Ignore the fact that they were both holding Ito’s hands. This was unrelated to their argument and, frankly, rude to point out.)

No one was expecting to see the Botanical Garden being prepared for what Kuroki could only assume was a party. Small lanterns were strung among the greenery. Gorgeous fabrics were draped over the trees. The very air itself seemed to shimmer with magic. In the center of the garden hung a giant chandelier, the magestones just barely swaying in an impossible wind.

Tiny faeries, no bigger than the palm of Kuroki’s hand, whizzed around, preparing everything with a frankly shocking amount of focus.

Kuroki pointed at the faeries. “Why aren’t you that hard-working?”

Crowley’s mouth dropped open in offense. “It’s not easy running an entire school, you know!”

“We are well aware,” said Vil, flatly.

Crowley frowned. “Kids these days are so rude.”

“You tch-ed at us!” Kuroki said.

Kuroki swore he saw the man roll his eyes.

"Oh, you are such a bitch."

Crowley didn't dignify him with a response. “That is the precious magestone that disappeared this morning. Don't tell me they pilfered such an important stone for aesthetic purposes…”

“Didn’t you also use a large, important magestone in a chandelier, Headmaster?” Enma asked, ‘politely’.

Crowley did not seem to appreciate his extremely devoted Hate Club.

Riddle raised his hand.

Crowley immediately motioned for him to speak, since clearly allowing the Yuus to talk wasn’t going to get him anything but insulted.

“Is that the Faerie Queen?”

Crowley’s head jerked around to look, and something like horror dawned across his face. He threw himself at Ito, again, for comfort. Ito gave a bone-deep sigh.

“If she's outside of her domain at this time of year, there's only one explanation: Night Raven College's Botanical Garden has been selected as the venue for the Fairy Gala,” said Leona, with a vindictive kind of glee.

“Dear oh dear. Goodness gracious me. Fiddlesticks…”

(“Please just say ‘damn’,” Ito muttered.)

��Oh, the Fairy Gala? I’ve always wanted to go to one of those!” said Kalim, brightly.

“Yeeeaaah,” said Kuroki, slowly, looking around for an explanation of what was, apparently, common knowledge in this world. “Cooooool?”

“The Faerie Gala is a festival that the faeries hold to usher in spring. Those who dwell in the Faerieland choose a place to hold it on a whim when spring draws near. Supposedly, they celebrate the turning of the season with a party and fashion show,” Riddle rattled off, with all the passion someone who had memorized a page of his textbook could muster.

Enma’s fingers twitched like he was missing his notebook. He opened his mouth to ask for more information, but Azul saved them before Enma could ask for an impromptu lecture:

“Should we shoo them off?”

(Enma shot Azul a glare. Everyone knows that if someone moves past a topic you can’t immediately go back to it. How dare Azul use societal norms against him?)

“We can’t,” Crowley sighed. He had, apparently, taken to patting Ito on the top of the head to comfort himself. Ito was glaring at a particularly large rock on the ground, and it didn’t take a genius to see that they were considering bashing Crowley’s head in. Which is why Crowley didn’t seem to notice. He continued to pet his emotional support teenager. “If it were to be interrupted or spoiled, that would incur the fairies' wrath, and Twisted Wonderland would be forever enveloped in winter's cold, harsh embrace.”

“Gasp. Faeries are petty. Who knew,” said Kuroki.

Crowley ignored him – thus, proving his point.

“When the fairies decide upon a venue, there is no negotiating. We can hardly chase off the fairies, but sitting around waiting patiently for the gala to end is also not an option. The Fairy Gala's post-event festivities can easily run for three months. Without that magestone, the temperatures across campus will remain in a state of chaos. We cannot hold classes under such conditions.”

The students immediately perked up.

They can’t hold classes… for three months…?

For the first time ever, Night Raven College students were united in one singular goal:

Impromptu Spring Break.

“What if we ask for it back?” Kalim asked, slowly, unable to hide the wide grin stretching across his face. “Would they give it to us?”

“You’ll find few faeries as mild-mannered and gracious as I,” Crowley said, shaking his head, apparently unaware that his students were absolutely not on the same page as him. “If they want the stone as a part of their chandelier, then we will have to be crafty in our attempts to get it back.”

“... well,” said Azul. “This is hardly our job.”

“It’s Ito-chan’s job,” Crowley said, petulantly.

“I’m on strike.”

Crowley’s mouth fell open. “Ito-chan?!”

“I literally told you this, like, two days ago.”

“You said you’d help!”

“I said I’d tell you where the magestone was. That’s not the same thing.”

“Let me remind you, Headmaster, that we didn’t get to enjoy our Winter Break,” Enma said. “Could you remind us why?”

Crowley started sobbing again.

“I’ll come visit you during the break,” Ito offered. “We can go on vacation – I mean, ‘investigating’ – for a week, or something.”

Crowley sniffled. “Really?”

“Sure,” Ito said, shrugging.

Crowley took a moment to consider this.

Everyone waited with bated breath.

Crowley hung his head. “I cannot allow for this. The school’s reputation is on the line. If we closed for three months, imagine the headlines…!”

The students were entirely unimpressed.

“Here we go with the same old story – a self-important grown-up dumping unpleasant work on his students,” Idia muttered under his breath.

“You're right that being unable to hold classes is a serious problem. But is it one that students have any business addressing?” Riddle asked.

You know you’re fucked when even Riddle Rosehearts isn’t eager to help you get your school back in order.

“The headmage is the only one who can be considered responsible for campus affairs. As a student, I fail to see how any of this is my job,” Vil said.

“Maybe I can take Jamil on vacation,” Kalim said, stars in his eyes. “Then he’ll finally relax!”

(Kuroki, privately, doubted this, but whatever. He wasn’t interested in helping Jamil of all people. Kalim could keep his delusions, for now.)

Crowley looked horrified by his own students’ lack of enthusiasm – or, in Kalim’s case, enthusiasm about the wrong thing.

“Crowley, you shove all of your work onto Ito. We're impressionable children, you know,” Kuroki said.

“Goodness. I know temperatures are in flux, but you needn't all be so unseasonably cold…” Crowley straightened up, something wicked gleaming in his eyes. “I had a feeling you'd respond thusly. So be it. I'm afraid that missing three months of classes means I won't be able to advance you to your next year of studies. That is to say… the entire student will be held back, yourselves included.”

The Ramshackle students didn’t bat an eyelash.

However, the Housewardens immediately started panicking.

Ah, the unity was nice while it lasted, Kuroki supposed.

Whatever. The Yuus were on strike.

“Hey, do we have the ingredients for popcorn?” Kuroki asked.

Enma grinned. “I’m pretty sure we have some at Ramshackle, yeah.”

“I wonder what the temperature’s gonna be like, there,” Ito mused. “Maybe it’ll actually be normal, for once. Wouldn’t that be a trip?”

~

By the time they’d returned to the meeting room, three bags of popcorn in hand (Grim had already eaten his, of course), the Housewardens and Crowley had already hit a wall:

“Sneaking into the Fairy Gala and swapping the stone out for a fake… that's quite the cunning plan! However, there's one snag. It hinges on our ability to get into the Gala unnoticed, and I'm afraid that that may be impossible –.”

“I N   S T O C K   N O W !”

Every head turned to find Sam standing behind them, his hands laced behind his back and an innocent smile in place, as if he had always been there.

“Hi, Sam,” Enma said, grinning.

“Hey hey, little ghouls!” Sam said, cheerily, patting Enma on the head as he passed. “Now, I hear all of you imps are in a bit of a bind?”

“Hello, Sam-san. Why am I not surprised you have an internal radar for desperate customers – ah, sorry, ‘business opportunities’?” Azul said, wryly. As if he had any place to speak on the matter.

“My friends on the other side tipped me off,” Sam said, flashing a wink.

Kuroki felt a weight settle against him, as if someone was leaning on him, but he couldn’t see anything there. He was not going to acknowledge this. If he didn’t acknowledge The Horrors they didn’t exist. Everyone knows this.

Sam procured a small vial full of what looked to be glitter. “Now, Headmage, is this, perhaps, what you’re in the market for?”

Crowley sunk to his knees, devastated. “My wallet…”

“What’s that?” Enma asked.

“Faerie dust,” Sam said, taking a pinch and tossing it at Enma.

Instead of being covered in glitter, as one would expect when watching someone throw glitter at someone, the dust dissolved. For a second, it seemed that the dust had simply disappeared without doing anything, but then Kuroki noticed that the light seemed to catch on Enma’s skin in a way that looked just a hair unnatural. Highlighting his features in a way that made him seem sharper. Normally warm brown eyes suddenly had an orange tint.

“You can only get faerie dust from a willing faerie, so anyone human with faerie dust sprinkled on them is basically part of the family! With this, you could sneak into the party just like you were planning!”

Ito looked at Crowley. “Do you have faerie dust? Can’t we just wring it out of you?”

“Thank you for trying to save me money, Ito-chan,” Crowley sniffed. “Alas, only smaller faeries have faerie dust. Larger faeries tend to bless humans instead, and I don’t believe you would be happy if I changed your hair color.”

Ito looked put out. Kuroki strongly suspected they had been secretly looking forward to beating the shit out of... no, sorry, wringing the faerie dust out of Crowley.

“Normally, I’d prefer to spare such expenses, but I fear I have no choice… bill it to the school. You can give the receipt directly to Ito-chan. Ito-chan, count it as a business expense.”

Ito rolled their eyes.

Sam patted them on the shoulder. “Fight on, little ghoul.”

“Gee, thanks.”

Sam headed out, pleased with his deal-making.

“Great, we have faerie dust. Now what?” said Vil.

(“Does this stuff come off?” Enma mumbled.)

“Now, we must decide who will be stealing the magestone!” Crowley said.

He sent a forlorn look Ito’s way. As if he thought that, if he were simply pitiful enough, Ito would cave in and help him.

Unfortunately, Kuroki feared that he might actually be right.

For now, at least, they were holding strong: “We should hold a vote. I vote Malleus Draconia, since he’s a fae and not here to argue. All in favor?”

“Aye,” everyone chorused, immediately.

Crowley shook his head. “I’m afraid he does not fit this year’s theme.”

“Damn,” said Grim. “We were so close.”

“What is this year’s theme, Headmaster?” Riddle asked, dutifully.

“Exotic.”

The silence that followed was extremely awkward.

Most of the Housewardens were determinedly staring at the ground, avoiding eye contact with a few particular students.

Leona looked like he was torn between being devastated and trying desperately to find a way out of doing this. Kalim still had his usual smile in place, but one of his eyes was twitching.

Ito was the one to break the silence, heaving a great sigh and pressing their face into their hands.

“I fucking hate it here.”

Well, at least Ito might hate Crowley, now.