#(after the rewrite to change the perspective. lmao)

[little-eye-guy]

1700 words n_n

[diabolikpersonals]

sorry for such a broad question but in your opinion is laito a well written character relative to everyone in diabolik? i really Want to learn more about him but i also dont want to subject myself to All That and i just want to know if he's worth reading about or just a pile of interesting plot threads thrown together for shock factor and unfulfilled thematically.

like my current personal opinion (may be wrong) is that i dont feel satisfied with the idea of yui's love or proactiveness fixing laito in any way because it doesn't mesh well with the actual ideas surrounding his character and unpacking that love is not poison goes beyond romantic love or a singular place of understanding. additionally it doesn't feel earned it feels like a chore for the player to trudge though for the sake of reading. i dont want to read laito's story that bad if it's the case yet im intrigued by the things offered by his character like the processing of the deeply visceral way csa shatters who you are

I wanted to wait till I finished his CL to answer so I'd be fully caught up with laito's routes, but that'll take too long so.....!! I might change my answer later!! lmao

[tw laito stuff, csa and suicide, yeah]

I do think Laito's a well-written character but his stuff is really difficult to get through if you have certain triggers, so it's tough to recommend. Even beyond the csa stuff, Laito is in a real hurry to die and he makes several attempts throughout the series. There's a certain unique sort of awfulness, at least for me, involving scenes where a character fails a suicide attempt and then get even more upset and desperate about it. So I understand what you mean when you say you're not excited about putting yourself through it. They were the hardest routes for me to get through too :')

A lot of earlier games suffer from endings that are like "And the two lived happily ever after, and we're not gonna unpack all that stuff!" and Laito's routes are no exception, but if you can look past that and make it to LE, I wouldn't say that Laito gets fixed. He has an ending similar to Ayato's that's like, it feels like we fixed everything but in reality we couldn't overcome the core issue! They really seem to believe that Laito absolutely can't be happy or live a normal life the way he is now. He has to die and/or rewrite his memories to be comfortable loving someone. It's up to your tastes if that's satisfying or not, but I kind of love the bittersweetness of LE endings, and the way they feel like a happy ending until you think about them a little too hard.

What's interesting is that Yui's purehearted love often hurts Laito more than it helps him. He responds to love, from Yui or from his family members, with revulsion. There's jealousy when he interacts with straightforward characters like Yui or Ayato, like "If only I could be as simple and pure as you, but nope, I can't." He's very self-aware for a diaboy, which only makes it hurt more when he keeps arriving at the conclusion that he's rotten. He definitely makes progress, which is really satisfying to see, like how he gradually allows Ayato back in his life emotionally. But as of right now, the end of his arc is so, like, "I tried, really I did! But my perspective on love is fucked and I need a hard reset! Maybe I'll be normal in the next life but definitely not this one!! Bye!"

...So, it's hard to say if you'll be happy with it. I see a lot of mixed opinions concerning the LE endings. They often give the diaboy what he wants but not what he needs, so you're left going, "Wait, I don't know about this...!" A lot of people really hate these endings, but they actually get more interesting to me the more conflicted they make me feel...and oh boy, was I conflicted about this one! :'D

If it sounds interesting to you, too, and you don't mind some pretty brutal scenes along the way, give Laito's routes a try. His HDB will definitely make you mad though lol

[m1ckeyb3rry]

tips and tricks on writing fanfic if u have any i beg <3<3

i have wrote so much throughout my life but it never feels like it flows right yk? i just want to write my silly characters being devastating with eachother

and you are infact my fav fic writer ever so pretty please <3

(its fine if not lol just may as well ask)

hihi!! sorry this took me a sec to respond to lol but yes ofc i can do my best to help!! and apologies in advance if any of this isn’t helpful/applicable 😓 i’ll put it all under the cut just because i can sense myself rambling in advance why did it end up being an entire thesis

okayyy so the most important thing for me when writing is having my plot and characters be in constant conversation with one another. typically i will come up with a very vague idea for a plot, which will then tell me exactly what kind of main characters i need to write, and from there, i build my cast!! it’s why i’m always afraid of writing characters ooc — typically i take aspects of the pre-existing character from canon and then expand on them so that they fit the plot i want, and sometimes i get worried that that means i’ve changed them too much LMAO.

once i understand what i want from my characters, i start to write. i usually have to rewrite my first chapter a few times as i get a feel for the characters and their perspectives, especially my pov character (we’ll call them mc for the sake of simplicity moving forward). it’s only after i feel like the mc’s voice and personality have been established that i can continue. i like to understand a character well enough that i can intuitively know how they would respond to any given situation. it makes it much easier in the future!! because once you’ve established a character, you can’t change them. i’ll use glass princess as an example because ik you’ve read it — if i wanted to write a slight different story, i could’ve written the mc to be a ruthless killer who has a short temper and resents her brother. however, i then would’ve had to work within the constraints of that character’s outlook instead of the constraints of current mc’s character!!

that’s why i typically only have loose ideas for plots. after i begin writing, i let my characters tell me what they want to do. they usually know what they want better than i do!! a lot of my “best” scenes have been entirely unplanned and based on me just following the characters’ actions to their natural conclusion. i guess you could say i go into each chapter having an idea of what the “inciting event” for the chapter will be — for example, mc runs to the tea shop the day after meeting the blue spirit, but the results of that inciting event are based more on my knowledge of my characters than any preconceived outlining or plotting. along the same lines, EVERY time i’ve had writer’s block with a fic (that was unrelated to me losing interest in the fandom/character/storyline) it’s been because i’ve forced my characters into a situation that they would not naturally end up in. my best example of this is a story i started writing with a very cold main character; she meets an injured enemy soldier who has lost his memories, and the plot was meant to revolve around her nursing him back to health and falling in love with him. however, given her character and the backstory i knew she had, i genuinely couldn’t come up with a single reason for why she would heal him instead of just killing him or turning him in, so i literally abandoned the story 😭 essentially i would recommend solid understanding of characters over a solid understanding of your plot 100% of the time. imo strong, well-rounded characters can carry even the shittiest of plots, but the opposite is rarely if ever true.

that was a lot of theory stuff!! as for where i get my ideas (not exactly what you asked but tangentially related so i’ll add it in here in case anyone else is reading and wants to know), it depends on the kind of fic i’m writing. my favorite fics are canon-verse, and for those fics i try to look for niches in the source material that aren’t already filled and make a character for it. the best example of this that i can think of off of the bat is two of my aot fics — in one, the mc is a member of the military police and the first interior squad, and in the other, the mc is a warrior candidate during the events of the show. both of these roles aren’t really filled by canon characters, so creating these characters allows me to look at plot events in a new light, which lets me expand the fic into something beyond just a rehashing of canon. in terms of au’s…to be honest listening to music is huge for me!! i’ll scroll through tik tok and hear an audio that inspires me, and once i have a vibe for what i want to write, i’ll search for similar songs that help me picture the general aesthetic of the au. the idea for my one bllk fic peregrine was conceived when i heard a snippet of the song welcome and goodbye by dream, ivory, on tik tok!! overall i don’t really like writing straight au’s that much though. idk why but in my experience every time i’ve tried to write an au fic i’ve gotten bored of it much much quicker than i would’ve with a more canon-based story. that’s just me personally though!!! i do loveeee worldbuilding though HAHA the amount of fantasy worlds i’ve created but never written for is horrific.

when it comes to things like grammar, sentence structure, and word choice, the only two things you can do to improve are reading and writing a LOT. at first, you should read more than you write, and when i say reading, it can be literally anything. find what you do and don’t like from all of the authors you encounter, and try to incorporate the pros into your writings while noticing the cons in your own work. it’s not plagiarism! you won’t be able to copy any author’s style completely, and if you engage in enough kinds of works, you’ll become a blend of so many different styles that it won’t sound copied or anything. then, once you’re comfortable mixing and matching depending on what scene you’re writing (maybe for a serious scene, you take references from a classical novel, whereas for a more lighthearted moment, you look at a social media au to see what kind of jokes might land with a broader audience), you can start to develop your own style!! it’ll come naturally as you go. the more you write, the more you will be certain of yourself and the way YOU would write something. the mixing and matching will smooth into one style that flows more naturally and does what you need, when you need it.

my final advice is that you shouldn’t compare yourself to others!! just because your writing doesn’t sound like your favorite author’s doesn’t mean it’s any worse. i’ve read amazing stories that are nothing like my own — it doesn’t mean that mine are worse than those stories, just different. there is a place in this world for every single story!! and it’s inevitable that you will look back on your old writing and cringe. i do!! i cannot read anything i wrote more than a year ago because i’ve improved so much that the old stuff is embarrassing to me. if you don’t push through the fear of cringe, though, you’ll never get anywhere. i’m not sure if you’re planning on posting anything ever, but i can say with certainty that if you do, there will be someone who reads and loves it. there’s people who still comment on and read and love my stories from 2021 that i absolutely despise now (it’s the only reason they haven’t been deleted yet). oftentimes we are our own worst critics, and also, knowing the plot ahead of time doesn’t help (writing suspenseful scenes is SO HARD when you know what’s coming 😭). your readers will love what you write, probably even more than you do!!

i hope that that was helpful and i’m so sorry for writing a literal essay OMG. like this is such a long post 😓 if you have any questions about what i wrote or about a specific aspect of the fic writing process, then lmk!! i’m always happy to help 🫶🏻

[intogenshin]

I don’t personally agree with the idea that scara wants to be punished for his actions

I’m not saying it’s wrong, it’s ultimately a matter of interpretation since the available info isn’t decisive enough, I just would favor a different characterization for him

The concept of suffering as a punishment for one’s wrongdoings is just too.. western, a catholic principle that’s accepted as the natural order of things. If you do something wrong, you’ll suffer a punishment in whatever form it comes. It’s also how the concept of karma is understood in the west: a retaliation for past actions manifesting in the form of suffering

But that’s not what it is in the religions it comes from

Buddhism itself, where scara takes most of its inspiration, centers its beliefs on the idea that suffering is a natural part of this world. It’s not a punishment on its own, and the three betrayals in my opinion illustrate this very well: Ei meant no wrong with her actions, she wanted scara to decide on his own fate and she understood the complexity of his existence, but he still suffered because of it; dottore purposefully hurt him and deceived him into believing a loved one had harmed him intentionally; the child did nothing to hurt him, mortality is a part of life. I haven’t read up much on how redemption is achieved in Buddhism, but it doesn’t seem to necessarily involve a form of punishment, rather seems to be more about balance and making choices to become better

Scara made the step to acknowledge that he’s done wrong by taking back his memories. Nahida tells him that if he does he’ll accept that he’s evil, that this is part of him, and scara still does. I particularly liked this writing choice (even though I would have enjoyed him as the evilest boy in town) because, first, it makes a point of not erasing his wrongdoings and mistakes despite him erasing himself from the world: nothing will ever change what he did = how others were harmed. And second, he accepts his responsibility and admits guilt. Fans always say they consider him not well written because he “didn’t face consequences for his actions”, but what else could possibly happen to him or be subjected to that will make him learn or reflect on something he hasn’t already? What would be the purpose in the narrative of further punishment? Does he need to suffer in retaliation? He already has, but rather than a punishment it was the culmination and result of his own choices that brought him suffering.

The idea of him living in constant pain, burdened by what he did, isn’t that just another form of pointless punishment? I think the character has been explicitly shown to regret, but not to be currently burdened. He rather seems liberated.

His character revolves around the concept of transactional relationships, hence why after the irminsul rewrite he’s fixated on repaying the merchant who helped him in the rain, and why he accepts to be Nahida’s prisoner (in his perspective): he wants to be even. He also tells traveler so. I don’t think Nahida sees it that way though, which might be one of her goals in helping scara, to release him from that worldview. He seems to apply a similar logic for his victims (like kazuha) since he doesn’t intend to hide from them, but there might something else there more about how he lived deceived by dottore, perhaps this is what he believes is fair.

But then again other people can interpret these same points as him paying back for what he’s done and even desiring the punishment of those he wronged. It’s just a matter of interpretation like I said, it’s just I prefer my own lmao

[bonefall]

So since you plan on keeping leopardstar as a thistlelaw supporter are you planning on doing the same with blackstar? I'd personally argue he was worse in a much more lifelong way than leopard was so I'd figure, but who knows.

He WAS much worse, there's no argument back from me here lmao. Early on in the rewrite I was deciding on which one of them was going to have a long redemption arc, and which one of them was going to going to get merc'd. One could repent; but not both.

I decided that Leopardstar fit MUCH better as the one who gets merc'd, for a few reasons;

Her actions in TNP are more consistent as someone who supports Thistle Law. ShadowClan's just uncooperative, but RiverClan is an active danger because of Sunningrocks. She was even happy to watch the other Clans get driven out, allowing Hawkfrost to say that they should hurry up and get gone so RiverClan can have more land.

Hawkfrost is not born evil, so that has to come from somewhere. And his story is now that he was failed by RiverClan. Leaving Leopardstar out of that just to arbitrarily say She's Sorry Now makes a less coherent Bonefall TNP and implies nothing could be done to prevent Hawkfrost's radicalization, because having a completely repentant leader wouldn't have changed this. Characters are, at the end of the day, a writer's tools.

ShadowClan's proximity to ProtagonistClan makes it much easier to show Blackstar's redemption. I did fix the Lake Map so that RiverClan isn't IMPOSSIBLY far away, but because ShadowClan is a major neighbor in Po3, I have more opportunities to display how Bonefall Blackstar is different from Canon Blackstar, including that he punishes the patrol who watched Berrykit suffer. (letting shadowclan not be EvilClan in the rewrite was a bonus)

And her killing at Mistyfoot's claws is the Thesis of Bonefall TNP; that Thistle Law will not go away on its own, and that these ideas do not die unless they are killed.

So Blackstar goes on a long journey for redemption, and Leopardstar dies at the end of Bonefall TNP. Change or die. No point in having the same arc for two characters.

(Snipped quote from a very long post I made on Mistystar in general below the cut)

""...Mistystar’s killing of Leopardstar, I will argue, is the thesis of Hawkfrost’s arc in Bonefall TNP

RiverClan, in canon, never has a reckoning with the fact that they allowed Tigerstar to take over. They rapidly pivot Leopardstar and RiverClan as a whole to be regretful of the choice without showing ANY remnant supporters, refutation of the ideology, or even any sympathy for Feathertail’s retconned trauma in Shadow In RiverClan, a book I’ve spoken about strongly disliking.

Making Leopardstar’s character consistent, and fixing Shadow in RiverClan, preventing this ridiculous canonical post-hoc retcon that they’re just fine after TPB, is something I care immensely about.

So there is no situation anymore where Mistyfoot can just sit back and follow the code until the Clan stops following Thistle Law. You can’t appease fascists. These ideas do not die unless they are killed.

And TNP is now a story about the Tigerkin, split between their perspectives. As you know, Hawkfrost’s arc is that he is failed by RiverClan, becoming the inheritor of an ideology that should have been buried before he was born. She thinks that with his death things can maybe go back to normal... but it doesn’t. Because Hawkfrost was not the problem. He was a victim just as much as he was a perpetrator.

Mistyfoot kills Leopardstar, a thing that should have been done a long time ago, and rules the Clan in a way as to limit the influence of Thistle Law. As much as she can, she tries to prevent what happened to Hawkfrost from ever happening again, truly wrapping up his story for Bonefall TNP.""

[morgana-ren]

Hi Morgana :)) hope you're having a good day. So I stumbled upon this video and the discourse in the comments https://youtube.com/shorts/cbtSWTjXvZQ?si=8g19VZHJUNI-5niU

And quite frankly got curious as I didn't get to play much of an early access Astarion but I do remember how his attitude at the tiefling/goblin party seems a lil different from early access to launch as well as his noble to charlatan change. So I thought that I could ask the Lore Mommy do you think he was changed that much and or how these changes shifted your perspective on his character. Because personally I do view him as a decadent and somewhat hedonistic as Ascended and those traits do show in his Spawn persona as well.

So just curious about your thoughts on this:))

Okay, I ended up fucking rambling and getting off topic here. This is too long for comfort. I'm sorry I just ended up blabbing, I swear that wasn't the intention lmao. I ended up looking into the comments at aforementioned discourse and it just reminded me of shit, so please forgive me. I tend to r a m b l e with a fuckin capital R. I'm talking in a more general sense and not at anyone in particular, most especially not you, so please don't think that. It's just my observations at large. I love questions like this and I hope this doesn't make you roll your eyes.

So, I got the EA version of the game when it was still fairly early. It was Patch 2, if I recall. It was interesting watching the group develop and grow as the writers and developers decided some things fit more than others because sometimes the patches were so drastically different than the last. Wyll actually got an entire rewrite between the EA and the full release. All of the characters we had went through changes (except Karlach and Halsin because they weren't there but they were likely tweaked behind the scenes.) A lot of Astarion's concept was already written, but his character was absolutely tweaked. The art book and a lot of the released designs are very early. We had them as of patch 2 where he was drastically different. In the beginning, they very much were going more for the stereotypical 'evil' follower. You could play as a good character and he would still like you, but he was very much geared for more debauchery-based playthroughs. It's also important to note that we really didn't get to demo everything. We only got the first act, and some of the more shallow aspects of it.

The thing about Baldur's Gate 3 is it is written so well because no character is good or evil. They are rounded, genuine characters with stories and lives and opinions of their own. You can dislike them, but you have to acknowledge they aren't written to be banal stereotypes. Astarion was a bit more of an evil clusterfuck in EA, but even then, there was a deep pain inside of him, and he was using his callousness and lack of giving a shit as a defense. Even then you knew something was very wrong. He mentioned Cazador because you ran into the Gur hunter, and you knew he was kept as a spawn against his will and was tortureda and had a very dubious past, but a lot of the character development wasn't in the EA-- because they didn't originally intend for it to be there.

But that doesn't fully change his character like some of the comments and other videos and posts I see seem to suggest. It seems like a lot of people have an egregious misunderstanding of his arc-- especially on tiktok and youtube shorts where the audience is younger and more prone to projection and group-thinking, echo-chambery line of thought.

Here's the rundown from what I remember deducing with EA combined with my personal playthroughs now that the game has released:

Astarion was absolutely a shithead before he was taken and turned. We don't know about his childhood, mostly because he doesn't know or remember, but I can say with certainty that he didn't become a dickhead after Cazador. Being taken made him worse, but he absolutely was an asshole before he was taken. He probably wasn't the traumatized, terrified young man he is now, but he was probably a real shit-kicker. He was on the winding path to darkness and they make this clear.

(His childhood was not touched on in the EA at all. All you knew is magistrate, vampire, gur killed him, Cazador, slave, and his dickish, libertine attitude.)

He is a noble though. This much we knew. He is privileged. Elite. He took without caring and doled out where he saw fit. He was your stereotypical rich boy-- or that's the vibe he gives off. He doesn't give off 'I earned my way into power' like Gortash does. He gives off 'I was born into privilege and I'm making it everyone else's problem.' He's educated and very savvy with language in a way that those of higher education access learn to be. He is well spoken and snubs his nose at 'lessers' in a way you see the wealthy do so casually. He was likely living a life of luxury and emerging into his own life in an Elon Musk-esque sort of evil powergrab. He might've always been a pesky little troublemaker, but he very much has 'I'm rich and I don't care about you' vibes, even beneath all of the trauma. This did not develop from Cazador. This was preexisting.

He was young. He was impulsive and dumb. He never had a chance to emotionally mature. It's entirely possible that, had he been left alone, he might've blossomed into a better person. But do not be mistaken, he was a bad person. Honestly, it's more possible to me that he would have just become another corrupt patriar with the city in his coin purse. Either way, fate played him a different hand than the one his birth had decided on.

You are told that he is a magistrate back in the city, which is true. When you play his origin story, you get options relating to it and it's actually been referred to a lot since the EA. He absolutely was some form of up and rising politician seeking power. A man with high ideas of himself, libertine proclivities, a self-centered attitude, and very much not a good person. Probably not horrible or sadistic for fun to the degree he is now, but definitely spiraling that way with the path he was on. The seeds had been planted already before any of his trauma happened.

I assume he wasn't quite important enough that his death would cause an uproar, but probably an impudent little upstart with his eyes on high political power just getting his bearings in the political world with help from mommy and daddy. The kind of petty asshole who abuses any authority he gets and doesn't care who or what gets in his way because he has some shit to prove and a life to live, everyone else be damned. That kind of person. He had ideas and ambitions, and is probably very open to corruption from the get-go. The kind of politician that dies in the street and people go "Hmm. Shame." and move on because they weren't anything special or grand. Just another corrupt asshole getting what they deserved. Another rich daddy's boy brought to the knife by the populace.

He was mourned. Someone missed him. But it wasn't the people of Baldur's Gate. That's for sure. He was forgotten before he became a true problem. Killed and stemmed. Just. Another. Cruel politician. Just another bastard with a big head. Just another.

In short, he definitely made some enemies and had drawn the wrong sort of attention during his time as a magistrate. Being the peacocking, lovely, arrogant young man he is, I bet he'd managed to make more people unbelievably pissed off than any sort of admiration, which normally for the rich isn't a problem, but... when it is, it really is, as you can see.

Even in the EA, he is very open with you tells you that the Gur, likely unhappy with a recent ruling he made, jumped him and murdered him in the street and you can let him kill the hunter. Thing is, Gur are not a violent people. If they attacked him like that, he did something to warrant it. It had to have been pretty nasty for it to have that consequence. The main difference is in the EA (later, of course, but still) you can find out that it was not Cazador that sent the Gur hunter. In fact, it was someone different entirely. I think it was someone named Maiden Fel or something. I do not remember. They likely switched it up. It was not the Gur looking of their own volition originally, but neither was it Cazador. But the EA was also slightly disjointed and broken so it's hard to tell what was canon at the time.

Astarion, in his shitty early days, isn't shy about his slight racism. He seems to dislike everything that isn't human or elven. It's entirely possible he had racial/cultural biases against the Gur and ended up pulling a ruling that was extremely unfair. It would be fair for them to seek retaliation.

This is never officially elaborated on as far as I know, but I do honestly believe that Cazador was almost more coincidence than anything. He saw a young, beautiful boy and went "Hmm... useful." He smelled blood in the water and saw someone that wouldn't be missed and offered them eternal life, knowing this silver-haired young man would be foolish enough to grasp it. He probably reeked of privilege. He would take it with open arms and without asking why or what for because that is what he was used to. Privileged people do not ask. They take. Cazador knew this.

(The point of me running through his past is to point out that not everything can be blamed on his trauma. He was at least kind of a bastard before this ever happened. And both EA and release have the similar trauma background almost identically.)

As we know, Astarion died that night. In the street. In a puddle of his own blood. He was scraped off the cobblestone and thrown into the cemetary, where he emerged the next night to his new life-- to Cazador. He didn't die. Astarion the Magistrate died. But Astarion, the stuck up, pompous, selfish asshole very much did not. In fact, that very same noble was forced to swallow a taste of his own medicine-- and it was a bitter fucking pill.

It made him worse. Trauma doesn't always make you soft and sweet. Sometimes, trauma makes you hard and cruel and angry and spiteful. Sometimes it doesn't make you apologetic; it makes you venomous. It makes you a spitting cobra rather than a loyal, empathetic puppy.

(Notice all I say about projection) Honestly, for me, it's nice to see that representation. Because my trama did not make me kind. It made me hurt. And it made me angry. And it twisted my mind into ways of thinking that I do not like. And you almost never see that. You see a lot of people who are kind and soft and gentle, but you don't often see those of us that were ripped apart and never managed to sew back together right. We do not bend and break our back and twist our tongues for others. Sometimes we are hurtful and mean and things that people paint as evil. Sometimes you grow claws rather than thick skin. Sometimes you grow fangs rather than a bigger heart.

So, more in line with the actual question, they very much did change up his arc. He was meant to be much more manipulative and shitty. It was datamined in the original script, I believe. That much was confirmed way earlier in the early access. But more or less, they went 'Hey, maybe we shouldn't write such a vapid dumbass character because it doesn't fit with the theme of 'complexity' we're working with here. Maybe we should make him more rounded. Maybe we should make him a person.' His story had been mostly mapped, but his character hadn't quite yet. And I'm glad they did.

Having him be a vacuous, shitty stereotype would have been a massive disappointment, especially in a game that is so deep.

Here's the bit though:

It is a CONSTANT throughout the game, EA and release; Astarion very much is an asshole. He is throughout the entire game. He can get better, but he's a dick. No two ways around it. His trauma didn't make him terrible, he very much already was a selfish person who ended up getting stunted. He learned to lie and manipulate to survive, but he wasn't a sweet boy when this happened to him. He was a 'bad' person who had something horrible happen to him that opened up his body and made him defensive and cruel, because he believes the world is cruel and indifferent to suffering, which goes in line with his earlier pre-kidnap thinking of 'Who cares?' It made him bitter for sure, but he already had those ways of thinking. He didn't care who he hurt. He didn't care about anyone. That's the entire bit with 'libertines' and the elite. He was already bad; it made him worse.

He was a fucking jackass. But notice I don't say evil.

He is not a character that empathizes or sympathizes well. He doesn't care what others are going through unless you teach him to, and even then, he is still learning. He is capable of trying if you steer him there. But in general? He rejoices in cruelty, being a general nuisance, being selfish, being power hungry, and being self serving. These are not solely trauma traits. These are not all defense mechanisms, though they can be. Astarion is a rounded character that is complex but right now is not the stereotypical 'uwu sad baby' shit that people love to do to him either. They made him relatable. Gave him tragedy. And people love to latch on to that to paint us as these pathetic babies incapable of our own thoughts who need to be coddled and babied and defended.

From EA, they made him more rounded. They made him less cartoonishly gimmicky. He's still a very selfish jerkoff, but he is scared, and vulnerable, and they made a point to emphasize that. He is not just evil hot vampire. He is scared, vulnerable, rude, pompous, arrogant, selfish, terrified, traumatized, angry, subdued--

and the list goes on. He is a person. He is a relatable person. But these traits he respects in the beginning? Selfishness? Greed? Self-serving? These are traits he admired before that were amplified by his trauma. These are traits that we condemn as a human race, but we still hone and harbor. These are things we have and we see and we experience day to day.

And that is why it is so easy to judge him and condemn him and try to paint him in black or white and call him banal morality labels like 'good' or 'evil.' It's part of why we have these arguments over his EA versus now. Because you see these good/bad things and immediately need to justify your love or hatred for him and defend or condemn him because you hear them and go "No! Wrong! I know he's selfish but he's not evil and--" and all of those other posts we love. People struggle with nuance. That is why it is so easy for people to make these videos defending their views. They grab keywords and examples and go "See!" and show little tiny snippets instead of an entire person. Hell, we do it in real life too. We point out one facet of someone's life and judge and condemn them based upon it. With Astarion, we see so much more, but even then, people still struggle.

People have real experiences with these values. People have personal feelings and judgments based on those things. They feel a need to analyze it, but most people do not know how. They cannot say "No, I just don't like him" or "Yeah, I enjoy him" and leave it at that. Similar to how I'm ripping this open right now. And I'm not condemning anyone. Clearly I'm going on a tangent right now over it. It's fun to do. But people feel like it's necessary. Like they have to.

In those comments, someone points out that media literacy is dead, and I'm inclined to agree. Everything is black and white and must be tucked into neat little boxes that are easy for people to digest. A bad character is a bad mean evil irredeemable character. A good character is a good character that behaves good and does things we expect from good people. Humans are no longer humans. They are not complex. They are not nuanced. They are one dimensional creatures to be judged and executed. That is why people struggle so hard with games this well written. Because it is not that simple. It is not in real life and it is not in the game.

Also in the comments here, it seems like everyone is arguing over a nonissue. It seems to stem from the fact that there's a lot of discourse over liking a bad character. People feel like his newer design is 'justified' and even though he is 'a jerk,' he is not 'irredeemable.' The entire thing is asinine.

No one deserves redemption. That is the fucking point of redemption. That is the entire whole ass point. Someone who does not deserve it working to redeem themselves. If you deserve redemption, you don't need it. If you need it, you do not deserve it. People forget that.

I see this a lot. People demonizing others who enjoy complex or more nuanced characters that are not wholly good. People saying characters are irredeemable and terrible and if you like them, you're a bad person. If you like villains, you clearly relate and you're a bad person. If you like this person, you're just like them and must be condoning their actions.

It's so fucking stupid. I see it with books too. People jump on protagonists because they think the term 'protagonist' means hero, and people conflate the two. I could go on a whole (new) tangent about this, but the point is people are incapable of processing that now, because we've really muddied the waters with morality and we use shame rather than critical thinking. We operate off of gut instincts like 'disgust' and 'hatred' and instead of thinking about shit, we just shove it away and condemn, condemn, condemn.

A natural consequence of this is people jump like dogs to twist that character they love or hate into a victim or something beyond their actual story. They will jump through hoops. They will do whatever it takes to avoid the stigma of being a 'bad person' in the eyes of some internet tiktok teen with a billion followers or some tumblr mom because they have been raised to believe that makes them a bad person and they will deserve the ostrasizing they get. They will be bullied and driven from the internet and sent anons until they go into fucking hiding. It's not okay to just enjoy something anymore. You have to justify it to some asshole. You have to break it open and twist it and defend it or burn it. You can't just exist.

People project. And holy fuck, have they projected on Astarion. It's another natural consequence of having such an incredible, well written character. People see themselves in him. In fact, people see themselves in him so much that they inadvertently take away his agency again in an ironic twist because people with similar feelings or experiences feel like they 'get' him better and therefore have more say over a fictional character than the character himself, the person who wrote him and the man who brought him to life.

My point with all of this nonsensical and unrelated bullshit rambling is that I loved Astarion in the EA and I love him more now. I would have loved him if they left him 'evil' but kept him rounded. His ascended ending is him falling deeply into his worst instincts for control coupled with his entitlement and need for safety. His spawn ending is him relenting and accepting and trying to be better within reason. He will always be Astarion. But he can make efforts to be better-- or worse. But he is always Astarion, and Astarion is decadent, and a bit of a jerk, and a stuffy noble elite with standards. He will always be like that. He will always be Astarion. He probably does better there with someone to babysit like Tav, but even a single spawn Astarion made great strides and effort.

I think we take that for granted a lot. We get people all up in their feelings and lashing out at people who like one ending or the other. We have people calling other people horrible people for trusting Astarion in the end of his spawn ending instead of coddling him and taking his fuckin' free will away again. We have people throwing food like kids in a cafeteria and it feels like no one slows the fuck down and wonders why they feel that way.

I like Astarion because he's an incredible character. I like him more in the release because he's more developed. He feels real. He feels like me. (See, projection.) I get it. People are not always pure good or pure evil. These are words we made up because we're an idiot little species that needs to categorize, same as why we name shapes and traits. But I liked him evil too. I just liked him. He just interested me. I always liked him.

He feels better in the release. More fleshed out. Less foreboding and more understandable. He's not Viconia from BG2 who is basically just there to be an evil temptress for 'hehe evil' characters. But guess what? It's totally fine if you wanna engage with him that way! If you don't like him, or you don't want to bother with making him better, you don't have to. If that's all you want to do, then hell yeah, baby.

At the end of the day, he is a model we can use to dissect ourselves. He can help us understand how we view complex issues. But it gets frustrating when people highjack it with an absolutely egregious misunderstanding of the story. Like things are so simple, you know?

In the EA, he was cool. He was really cool. But we didn't know much about him other than 'hehe evil.' We didn't know much about anything, and man, did we like to theorize. I can remember doing it years and years ago before the fuckin' game came out. But ultimately, it was always a projection of ourselves. What we wanted. What we saw.

They made him a more fleshed out being. They filled in the blanks. He is an arrogant fucking asshole, and he is rude, and entitled, and pompous, and cruel, and self serving and greedy and all of that 'evil' shit, but he is also human. He is capable of deep and profound love. He is capable of caring. He is capable of so much. He can be selfless and loving and caring and gentle. He can be genuine and honest. These traits do not define him unless he chooses to cling to them-- and he only does if he does not learn. And when he doesn't learn? He loses himself and fills his destiny of being the wretched, terrible perpetuator of abuse both on the populace and you. And that was the point. That happens when you lose yourself and give in to fear. It can happen to all of us. And sometimes it does.

But it really also isn't that deep, in the same breath. If you like the ascended ending which is a bit more in line with his original origins, so what? It's a cool ending. It's neato. It still has a clear and blatant message, but it's a fucking video game. Do what you like. If you think it's hot? So what? If you just enjoy the goddamned doomed narrative? So?

Not everything has to be a trial of who you are as a person. Not everything is that deep. Sometimes the answer is as simple as 'shit is cool' and it ends there. If other people look deeper into it, that sounds like a 'them' problem. That's their need to justify. That's their desire. Both EA and release are fantastic. Some folks have preferences. I liked both.

He's my boy. I love him for who he is and what he has done for me. And I'm grateful I got to see his development. I'm grateful I get a well written story with incredible characters. If people think he's wholly evil or good, that's their sack of beans, my dude.

[infraaa]

Hey I read the snow drive affogato hcs and I simply adored them!

I loved it!

Though now I can't help but be curious what general dating hcs for cookie run kingdom affogato are and what snowy drive affogato and crk affogato would have in common lmao...sorry if that's a stupid question and I feel as if I'm asking for the same thing twice lol...though they are different affgatos, they are still affogato! Again so sorry and you don't have to do this ask if you don't want to or feel like it's the same thing twice!

『No, no no hun! It’s okay. While I won’t rewrite the hcs out, I’ll gladly differentiate for ya! 🥰』

Generally, the hcs that I wrote can also be attributed to CRK!Affogato. However, SD!Affogato is taken a little differently.

My version of Affogato, unlike canon, it’s very kin to comfort and self assurance, security, etc, due to his childhood being the way it was. After the events of SNOWY DRIVE II, the overblot, not only was he physically wounded but he was mentally drained, plus with everything the reader went though with Lico/RV. Due to these things it’s changed his perspective on relationships, and how he needs to take you. SD!Affogato has to relearn how to take you, after the whole incident basically.

The hcs that align closer to CRK!Affogato, especially the Dirty Dancing hc, are the ones in my opinion to be more fun and easygoing. Affogato is a cool, happenin, and flamboyant dude in canon, so I wanted to yk… have that show a little bit. 🤭

In summary, SD!Affogato is more in tune with himself, is more reserved, and is a little more impulsive than canon. Hope that helps!

[waterberry-strawmelon]

dungeons and daddies season 2 rant!

this is mostly a vent post bc i’m just not a huge fan of the way the stakes in this story have been handled in the 2nd season so far! obviously i love the podcast so this is no hate on it, but i just wanted to get this out there and see if anyone else feels similarly, or if perhaps season 2 gets a little less messy and forcibly dramatic later on!

*Note: As of right now, I just finished Episode 13—aka the huge lore dump episode lmao! So maybe things get better after this and i just dont know it yet!

This is a lot of word vomit cuz I wrote down all my thoughts in my notes app on my phone stream-of-consciousness style, so if something doesn’t make sense, that’s why!

My problem with season 2 is that the rules of the world and of the story keep changing. The rules of the GAME aren’t changing, but the verisimilitude of the story itself is—they’re playing Calvin Ball with our suspension of disbelief, and it’s not working for me.

It’s like the Steven Universe Future thing of suddenly going against the previously-established rules of cartoon logic; suddenly we’re NOT supposed to laugh at cartoon slapstick and instead supposed to now see it as REAL INJURY that just…healed. But that breaks the audience contract!!

In Dungeons and Daddies, we’re supposed to believe that a lot of these jokes in season 1 don’t really matter. So when they DO in season 2, that’s not what had been implicitly agreed upon by the audience and the creators/writers about the story. 

So with this in mind, that we are now supposed to believe that these characters’ actions have real consequences. Willy Stampler is an abuser. If we’re trying to do a redemption arc, we need to fucking SEE that.

For this season to represent growing up and realizing that adults are fucked up and make fucked up choices and can grow and change and get better or get worse or maybe weren’t ever as great as you thought it was. Those are cool ideas! But for us to take them seriously, they’ve got to be handled with care; we can’t just be told these adults made fucked up choices and when it was posited as a joke, only for it to actually be SERIOUS (i.e., if for example, henry and darryl kissed in season 1 and it was played as a joke that may or may not have actually happened, it’s never addressed again, so it’s really not heavily staked in canon—then you cannot in season 2 say that actually, darryl and henry had a lot of tension after they got back to earth and it was awkward for the rest of their lives, but we didn’t see it it just happened off-screen, trust me. BECAUSE THAT’S NOT HOW IT WAS TREATED IN SEASON 1!!! YOU CAN’T REWRITE WHAT’S ALREADY HAPPENED—IT DESTROYS OUR BELIEF IN ANYTHING THAT HAPPENS IN THE STORY. SHOULD I TAKE THINGS AS JOKES, OR LITERALLY? If I took all the stupid shit in this podcast as real and genuine and serious, then this would not be a story i wanted to watch, because literally every character is an asshole. But that’s not how the story is sold to us!

It’s kind of like how ultimately, all the dads in S1 were kinda shitty, because they were played by actors playing Dungeons and Dragons as a comedy podcast. If the podcast had treated that stuff seriously, it would’ve been an ENTIRELY different tone, and no longer comedic. But now suddenly we’re supposed to take all that shittiness as if it WERE serious fact! But that wasn’t the implicit contract we’d agreed upon by engaging in this “comedy podcast” story!!!!!!!

I think it’s cool how the new dads/S1 sons are essentially acting just like the dads in S1 did, only we’re seeing from the kids’ perspective how it actually affected them. 

But at the same time…idk. It’s like you’re mixing metaphors. It doesn’t resonate with me, because i can’t be invested in any of it. Are the jokes real? I can’t get a feel for what kind of emotional weight i should be granting any and all of what the characters say and do.

The best thing about S1 is that it didn’t have to be believable; but in S2, they’re trying to make us believe in this stuff that’s not believable. So you’re losing my trust and interest in this narrative, y’know?

AND FURTHERMORE!!!!! I hate that Willy’s character has now been reduced to “narcissist = bad (which on its own is…not a great narrative to deliver about ppl with personality disorders), but he was in prison for a long time and realized he was mean so now he’s a nice guy! forgiveness <3.”

As if he didn’t abuse his son. ajskfmxghgjk. idk what kinda shit anthony’s trying to tell with this. it doesn’t have to have a moral or soapbox moment or whatever, but it almost erases the POWER of Ron’s arc in Season 1. by getting forgiveness from the narrative, without getting forgiveness from his actual victim.

This feels like a Rian Johnson movie just trying to be quirky and “subvert expectations ooooooooOOOoOoOoo” without that subversion actually feeling REWARDING or EARNED or JUSTIFIED.

In my personal opinion, I think it’s just not as strong a choice to try and get into character work this early in the story, as compared to the pacing of Season 1. Sure, we did get some good Ron growth for an episode at like… episode 14? But the dads didn’t get actual ARCS until after the halfway mark!!!!!!!! Sometimes they really didn’t even resolve themselves until episode 66—three episodes before the final episode.

and it feels like a lot of these story beats are trying to do the work of character arcs without setting up a sturdy enough character foundation to begin with.

i saw a lot of fans online praising the choice to have such important plot stuff happen so early, and while i agree the previous monster-of-the-week formula was getting a little dull, i also don’t think the characters have really felt fleshed out enough yet to get thrown into this sort of thing. like, i personally dont really care about scary’s complicated feelings because i havent had 30 episodes to get to know her yet (and more importantly—neither has BETH. the actors themselves are still figuring out their characters!) the characters’ emotional beats it feel much more rushed and much more forced, imo. which makes the foundations of this story feel unsteady, bc i dont have any handholds to come back to and connect with. i havent been able to connect with the characters OR the story yet, so having all this thrown at me as if it’s really meaningful just falls flat.

Overall, timeskips need to be handled with care. If we jump forward in time and suddenly everything’s different—just for the sake of uncomfortability and subverting expectations—you’ve really got to justify those character changes within the narrative. And so far, nothing’s feeling particularly justified. At least—you have to do this if you want your story to be meaningful and/or SAY something about TRUTHS in OUR WORLD outside of this fictional narrative.

I can tolerate all this nonsense if it’s not actually trying to reflect anything in real life, but if I’m supposed to take this story seriously as a funhouse mirror representation of real world themes, then you’ve got justify your narrative choices. Otherwise, you’re just confusing your actual motive.

Basically, to try and be comedic AND have real world dramatic tensions and significance and themes to connect with an audience, the drama and comedy cannot come from the same place.

Here’s an example: In Jojo Rabbit, the comedy comes from pointing out and emphasizing the ridiculousness of the Nazis’ ideology. The film does not derive its comedy from the most dramatic, real-world-reflective moments: the human connection between Elsa and Jojo, or Jojo and his mom; the danger Elsa found herself in under Nazi oppression; parental death; etc.

And vice versa, the comedic moments are not the emotional crux of the story. Even Jojo’s violent accident is played more lightheartedly; if they were to make THIS event (the grenade exploding and almost killing Jojo—a ten year old child) the driving tension of the film, then for us to feel actually INVESTED, it could not have been played as comedic as it was (i.e., the scene where they’re rushing him into the hospital on the gurney and his bloody thumb’s up pops into frame).

 Dungeons and Daddies Season 2, on the other hand, takes these emotional beats that have already been established for COMEDY, and tries to turn THAT into the dramatic, emotional crux of the show. And i as a viewer am just not as likely to be invested in that conflict or dramatic tension or to find the messaging about real life to be saying anything particularly resonant or meaningful.

TLDR: Dungeons and Daddies Season Two suffers from GENRE CONFUSION!!!!!!!

If ultimately Anthony and the rest of the gang are trying to say, “This is what life is like sometimes!” (which is, imo, what EVERY dramatic story is trying to say), then they’re not actually doing that, because they’re manufacturing these situations to fit what they want to say, rather than presenting the narrative first AND THEN ALLOWING THE MEANING TO DEVELOP NATURALLY FROM THE RESULTING EMOTIONS!!!!!!! Fuck!!!!!!

So basically, it’s still easy for me to enjoy the show—but the narrative does not provide me with enough material for ANY EMOTIONAL INVESTMENT, and that is really disappointing :(

[kyurilin]

To finish off my writing posts for the end of the year, here's just a post about my other writing projects I have going on!

Obviously Stray, the erasercloudmic story from my pinned post is being worked on albeit slowly. I have maybe a third of it written (which is still 27k words) and it's done very similarly to Mic's Bullshit Life although it does switch characters up. @shabby-blog can attest that it's a fun read as they've read what I have and are currently my biggest cheerleader in actually getting it done one day

I have. Two entire alternate versions of Crumbled Rooftops. You can blame shabby for these entirely but also me. I feed off of angst and well. These are angst. One of them (called Everything Crumbles) is Crumbled Rooftops but Hizashi dies and Nemuri lives, which after the anime made Shouta almost watch Hizashi get hit by decay became infinitely sadder. It changes the entire dynamic of Oboro coming back by like, a huge degree but hey it's great for when I wanna be REAL sad. The other is All That's Left, and in this one Shouta dies so it's just Hizashi and Oboro having to pick up the pieces. This one was an excuse to push Hizashi to his breaking point and make people scared of his power tbh. Neither of these are likely to be posted and both of them are currently VERY early stages but hey if you ever want to read them and cry hit me up

Also Crumbled Rooftops adjacent, my doc aptly titled Here Be Crumbled Rooftops Angst Snippets which is literally what the title says. Basically it was a place to dump all the little side stuff before the story that lived in my head rent free so I could get it out of my head and somewhere else.

I have a document that STILL is just called AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Which is appropriate for the fact that it's an Erasercloudmic story where Shouta realizes he has a crush on both his friends and doesn't know how to cope, Nemuri teaches him about polyamory, canonly Oboro and Hizashi make out when they're bored and AREN'T dating yet and then try to compete for Shouta's affections only for Shouta to get so flustered he tells them he likes them both. Very early stages but I have IDEAS guys it's gonna be cute and I may keep the screaming title lmao. This one (when I randomly get the desire to start it) will be posted I promise I just have to write it.

I have an entire finished story I wrote this year that won't get posted, I wrote an urban explorers rooftop gang polycule story that is absolutely the dumbest thing I could have written, it reads more like an outline than a story, but I binge watched a bunch of urbex videos in a row and knocked it out in four days. It's lovingly called I Found My Heart in the Abandoned Roller Disco and no. You cannot read it. It's staying in my Google docs. You are allowed to know that Shouta and Oboro have a moment in an abandoned roller skating rink that is the cutest shit. But unless I ever get the urge to rewrite it the way I did the original doc for matching tattoos, urbex rooftop gang polycule is staying buried.

Oh. And one last one. Shouta's adventures through joining the hero course, trying his best to ignore the two loudest idiots on the planet (and failing), becoming friends with the two loudest idiots on the planet (and the class president and an upper class student), losing one of his friends, pushing the rest away, getting tough love from Nemuri Kayama, being occasional jogging buddies with Tensei Iida, and eventually running into Hizashi Yamada again. Lovingly being called Get in the Van Shouta, There's Cats in Here based on a playlist that me and Shabby joked Hizashi would make for Shouta in high school if he and Oboro kidnapped him to give him a better life, this is the prequel to Mic's Bullshit Life from Shouta's perspective. And yes this one is started, yes it will take me a long time to write, but there's so many little Shouta stories I've wanted to write that all have to do with my rooftop gang headcanons and I've been in my feels about Mic's Bullshit Life, so I figured what better way to tie it together by taking the mentioned high school stories from Mic's Bullshit Life and adding them to these other stories I would otherwise write as one-offs.

Anyways yeah I've not written as much as I did last year and I've still yet to start a few ideas I had last year, but at least I've been writing!!!! Can't say I haven't lol.

[ao3feed-danganronpa]

Chapter 5: Kokichi Ouma

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/64I7NyA

by Chamalier

I rewrite every chapter from DRV3 (excluding Chapter 6) in order to kill Shuichi Saihara.

Kaito Momota rushed forward, hand clenched in a fist.

Shuichi Saiharadidn’t even think before he turned, chased after Kaito, and pushed him out of the way.

He felt a sharp, stinging pain on the side of his head. He felt something wrap around his lower half.

He struggled for a second, but the world went dark, and he didn’t see anything else.

When he woke up, it was inside the Exisal Hangar, with Kokichi Ouma standing over him, the promises of a plan on his lips.

Words: 10021, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Series: Part 5 of Shuichi Saihara Gets Killed Every Chapter

Fandoms: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: Major Character Death

Categories: Gen

Characters: Saihara Shuichi, Oma Kokichi, Shirogane Tsumugi, Momota Kaito, K1-B0 (Dangan Ronpa), Harukawa Maki, Yumeno Himiko, DICE (Dangan Ronpa), (mentioned)

Relationships: Oma Kokichi & Saihara Shuichi, Momota Kaito & Saihara Shuichi, Oma Kokichi & Shirogane Tsumugi

Additional Tags: Saihara Shuichi Needs a Hug, Blackened Oma Kokichi, Oma Kokichi Is a Little Shit, Oma Kokichi Being Oma Kokichi, POV Oma Kokichi, POV Momota Kaito, POV K1-B0, POV Saihara Shuichi, (I got carried away with the perspective changes my b), Angst, Oma Kokichi-centric, Whump, Killing Game (Dangan Ronpa), Different Victims (Dangan Ronpa), Saihara Whump, Inappropriate Use of a Hydraulic Press, (for murder), New Dangan Ronpa V3 Spoilers, Class Trials (Dangan Ronpa), Killing Game Executions (Dangan Ronpa), Execution, Mastermind Shirogane Tsumugi, Twitch Chat, LMAO, Mastermind Oma Kokichi, Kinda, youll see - Freeform

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/64I7NyA

[lesbianwyllravengard]

Yeah so, introspection is realising that you're a lot like Gavin Reed, and character growth is realising you don't want to be.

Needless to say I don't think this shit anymore lmao

Me getting ready to unload all of my anti-android sentiments into Gavin when I write Reed900 fics because when Gavin says these things it’s “intriguing” and “in character” but when I say them I’m “a horrible person” and “should be ashamed” of myself

[thedeafprophet]

what's this i hear about an imagined timeline for light fingers?? 👀

uh

this ended up being quite long lol. This is basically a summary of light fingers + my commentary, and a few places where i've made minor plot changes. had a lot of fun typing it up.

warnings for a) spoilers and b) this is about light fingers

under cut because of the length

My version of the story begins in 1898, when Alex, my light fingers PC descends to the neath alongside two of my other fl characters. (anyone who knows me, knows who Alex is lol), sometime in February. Imagine the general plot takes abouuuuut a year and a bit give or take. Alex doesn’t begin the Light fingers plot until after being in the neath for a month or two as well (shadowy myn)

Also gonna be upfront: Don’t like the beginning of Light Fingers lmao. Some parts of it are just unnecessary and never come up again esp in regards to the music hall singer. (The earlier stuff comes across to me like they had a few scenes written and then just mashed stuff together to connect them tbh). I ignore a fair bit of that stuff in my ponderings, since the plot didnt explore it and I don’t feel a need to.

( I think from a writing perspective it could have been neat to actually have the player meet up with the music hall singer sooner and cross notes instead of the long search. Have a text option of how much the player actually knew her on the surface, affecting a bit of the flavour text later on depending on the choice.  Talk more about Whats Going On, exchange info, and perhaps learn about her searching for Clara earlier? Before the lead up to her going missing at the violent scene and leading to the part with the bethlem? Though that part was also written weirdly like, what was going on with the manager, this seems like remnants before he was more established as a character- ok no no back on topic XD  Food for thought tho). Anyway, I think that part of the story probably takes a few weeks, maybe a month or so. The following time of tracking down Edward and all that nonsense in the lead up to the orphanage would be another two weeks. 

The actual process inside the orphanage and the searching would probably only be a few days…. But there’s the whole ‘buried alive section’, which makes it longer.  I’ve talked about my rewrite idea for that before. And then BOOM lighting the orphanage on fire. Still one of my favourite scenes. 

And then the situation of Clara being at the players house. I have a very vague idea for reworking Clarabelle’s parts of the story to actually have her be a character rather then a set piece. I think the Acquaintance and conversations system we have in newer plots now would have been a Great idea there. 

Letting her actually talk and do things would have been a major improvement without changing the plot. I think here would be a good first spot for a conversation- i don’t think the plot using the tea leaves as an excuse to not have a conversation is good. She would obviously be worried about her sister and clearly in a state of distress regardless. In my version Alex spends time talking to her and doing his best to help support before the bit of heading off to the university to the find the doctor.

The process of finding Dr Vaughan, zailing back and forth, bringing Clara, getting the items, etc. would be at least another few weeks if not months. And there’s the whole confrontation with Ed (Alex got some nasty bruises from that let me tell ya) and the ceiling part. Thankfully for me the story was already written when i got there, so i think in story the crew would only be there for a few weeks. This is another spot i think would be good to talk with Clara…. At least to establish more that she actually knows whats going on. 

And then the establishment of the basecamp. This is where that conversation idea really forms. Once the team is settled and one gear for preparations, in my timeline there’s a lot more general Talking between everyone. By now i think the timeline would be into later summer 

After that uhhhh well. The conversation with Fires is probably my favorite scene. What can I say but, Villains:™:. I’ve illustrated how that scene went on Alex’s part lmaooooo. 

Oh another thing i have with a headcanon is that edward goes immediately to the fingerkings after fires tells him to go away. This is because we get the uh. Gift. of the skin immediately following that conversation and i believe that since if you side with the fingerkings you tear off and get your own skin from that, its a similar situation with Ed here. 

Following that, the Hybrid is born in the fall (baby. My beloved child. I am so very fond of it.) Alex loved his kid immediately. I could say very much about the complexity of the situation for Alex, and the whole concept of breaking the cycle of abuse…..

I have less to say about the later plot stuff but also because I am getting tired lol. I think the time with the hybrids birth and raising it takes place over many months and takes the majority of time of the plot time tbh. All through the winter at the least. Introduce the baby to hanukkah. 

It’s into the spring when the whole Big Final Confrontation happens. And the wedding too I suppose. And of course, Catboy hours. There is no reason why siding with the cats *shouldn’t* give you cat ears. I mean, Edward gets snake eyes, it’s only fair. So Alex is a catboy in parabola. For fun. 

Now. You may wonder “Prophet, why would you choose to marry Poor Edward” and the answer is ‘because it was hilarious that it was an option’. And also I find yandere arcs in stories to be fun. We all know I have particular tastes lmao. 

In terms of in character justification ehhhhh its a little loose. Part of it the sway of the dream, but I suppose Alex found it the least violent end. (Wasn’t like he intended on getting married to anyone else lmao). And whilst i’m quite light on the topic in jest a lot I um.

Okay part of the thing I think isn’t talked about with Edward is that its entirely nonconsensual on his part, right? Like yea okay, he does the pursuing and stuff but its not like he’s actually attracted to the pc, its all because of a drug. And we SAW just how much that stuff fucks with people’s heads back at the orphanage, people literally would bash their heads in over being separated from the object of their affection. Like. Idk it just seems more serious to me then just ‘rejecting the advances’ of someone. This is mutually nonconsensual in a way. 

These are in no way his actual feelings. And like yea the dudes terrible and ‘deserves’ whatever is dealt to him or whatever, i’m not trying to woobify or anything, i dont care that much but.  Idk regardless the nonconsensual aspects make it quite weird.

This is a thing that bothers me with the moon milk stuff a lot. For obvious reasons. I often feel like I’m the only person reading it this way sometimes… i saw someone describe the Evil Light Fingers ending as ‘not that bad’ and ‘there’s worse things in the game’ and im just like ????? okay thats subjective whatever but uh???? anyway. yeah ive talked about my discomfort with the moon milk stuff before

Anyway suffice to say I have complex thoughts on the matter which is a whole other post in and of itself. 

So yeah anyway, end of spring, 1899 (the first one)  when the hybrid is freed to the ceiling and everyone says there farewells. I love that ending scene so much ngl,,,, I love the baby so much I’ve said so before but i will say it AGAIN. 

I still believe the team hangs out even after the plot. Alex goes to see Clara’s opera performances when he can, visits Heph in parabola when he’s doing silverer stuff (Alex becomes a silverer after LFs in response of all the weird dream stuff and wanting to have more control, and checks in on  Dr Vaughan at the uni from time to time (I chose for her to stay in London, I don’t care much for the starved men as a concept tbh) .

Annnnnyway yeah thats the whole timeline of lightfingers + my thoughts on it. If you actually read this whole thing thank you for paying attention to me I appreciate it <3

[writersmorgue]

quick rant about this fic i just read (it's actually an entire fucking essay but that's beside the point)

tw: sexual assault mention

i just spend TWO GODDAMN HOURS. at 11 in the nighttime. reading this stupid fic to help me go to sleep. now unless the author decides to write in first person or the entire thing is too illegible to read after one chapter i usually stick it out even if i'm not a fan and just silently grovel to myself after. but THIS GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING FIC. first four chapters? solid. ffs i COMMENTED and said how realistic and good it was written, but like fifth chapter in it goes back to the beginning and repeats basically all the same shit with the pov of the other love interest. now, this would be cool under multiple circumstances. namely: if it was a separate fic devoted to the other perspective, if it was cLEARLY stated that we changed perspective, if there was any context at all to the switch in perspective, if the change was fucking NECESSARY. but it was none of those things. literally switches for no reason, and then just retells the entire four chapters again- which by the way, we were left on a cliffhanger- with no point whatsoever. Also there were some things in the first four that didn't make sense, namely when they're having sex for the fourth time or whatever and the mc, who is asexual, has a breakthrough (part of the plot) and suddenly in the middle of sex starts loving it and all that, which would not be a problem if he didn't fucking not remember when they finished??? and it's not explained at all???? as an asexual with asexual friends i don't believe we have this super slutty side that is like a werewolf and just pops out without us knowing, it's all pretty conscious- and if it's not then that's a whole other problem. So that was weird, but ignorable, but then the rewrite CONTINUES TO NOT EXPLAIN IT. if anything it made it more weird??? like mc coming down from post nut and is like "why am i crying? wtf happened?" and i'm trying to figure out if this bitch was drugged or smthn,,, and no. it just happens. i do not understand. anyway moving on, congrats if you actually read this far idk if this makes any sense- and the main plot of this fic is about mc's asexuality, and a big issue in the first half is how he has no sex drive and character b does and they wanna compromise, which,,, the issue suddenly goes away in the second part? and now they don't really have an issue??? they're just chilling?? without ever resolving this?? ALSO character 2 SA'd mc???? and then the blame, even on the narrarator's part, is put on mc. for leaving. after he was assaulted. by someone he loved and trusted. also after they talk about it once like "oh THAT"S why you didn't like me forcefully shoving you down and hurting you without consent,, haha i'm so dumb" it is NEVER BROUGHT UP AGAIN AND SECOND CHARACTER COMPLETELY GETS AWAY WITH IT. NO CONSEQUENCES. A NYWAY. so we're at the end right? and i'm waiting for us to catch up to the line we were left at on chapter 4, which then happens, and the other half of the line is said. makes absolutely no sense. Why is this said? is it a marriage proposal? is it asking to be boyfriends again? why are you saying this??? do you forgive him now?? y'all literally tried to have sex the other day and were cockblocked by side character number 7 and there is no resolution. which BY THE WAY. mc 2 fucking stuck his hands in mc 1's pants with no consent, and mc threatened to safe word. i'm,,,,, that's not ok. y'all don't have an agreement, as far as the reader is aware, that no safeword pre-sex is consent. especially if he threatens it????? PLUS side character 3 SAW the bruises on MC's wrists after the SA and was like "lmao bruh u good" and he's like "oh yeah i'm good" which okay, but then also sees MC 2 have sex with side character 49 and then aggressively rant about how much MC fucked up,,, when he left the bruises,, does this not raise any reed flags??? not really my main problem at all but something that ticked me off. okay sorry, back on topic, so the last line. makes no sense, i've practically forgotten the first part since it was FOUR FUCKING CHAPTERS AGO. and then the fic just ends. that's it. that's all.

no more. I'm------ what the FUCK. It's ONE AFUCKINGM and i'm sitting here writing this because now i can't sleep bc of this bullshit. and of course it's my fault for reading this instead of fucking listening to music or whatever but DAMN. i was so happy too because FINALLY some long fic with good character relations and asexuality but no, i was wrong. fuck.

k nightt

[azurebluuu]

masterlist of all of my fics on ao3 + a link to my webcomic

in case people don’t want to look through my ao3 profile and also so i have something to pin on my profile lmao. i will periodically update this

My webcomic “CELESTIALS: Magic & Ruin”

She’s the princess of an empire. He’s the descendant of a now-disgraced family of warriors. When Aleeyah picks up an amulet deep within her family’s archives, she and Kalen find themselves separated for the first time in years. With tensions boiling between the rich and posh sky kingdom of Zeunia and the mineral-rich colony of Juno below, the friendship between the two teens is tested as the universe of the Nova changes alongside them.

WEBTOON | TAPAS

ESPRESSELEINE FICS

one question, two hearts - “ In which we get glimpses of what happened between Espresso and Madeleine on the trip mentioned in We've Never Met, and how Espresso deals with the feelings that came of it. “

decrescendo - Espresso and Madeleine play piano together, and a confession is shared.

but i love you so (please let me go) - The first in a two-part series, Espresso moves to the Cookie Kingdom and has to deal with complex feelings and his past relationship when his ex, Madeleine, reappears in his life. This is Espresso’s perspective, sequel in Madeleine’s perspective is in the works.

NON-ESPRESSELEINE COOKIE RUN FICS

to hell and back - A glimpse of Rye’s childhood. Also Chilirye. I will finish it... at some point.

GENSHIN IMPACT FICS

picturesque - A Kaebedo oneshot. Albedo sketches Kaeya.

bubbling under pressure - An (unfinished) Kokosara short fic. Sara decides to take Kokomi out on a tour of Inazuma City after seeing the extent of her exhaustion.

NINJAGO FICS

hope that you’re good to me, baby - A lava-centric Crystalized rewrite where Nya never regains her memories in The Call of Home, and Cole and Kai reconnect after several months separated.

REALLY OLD FICS

These were written in 2018 when I was like, 14, tread carefully because they are not my most well-written stuff.

a simple dare, really - The first fic I posted on ao3. A Monster Prom oneshot where Damien dares Oz for a kiss to see if he has a mouth or not.

were you human? - Another Monster Prom oneshot. Vicky and Brian ponder on their supposed humanity, or their lack thereof.

what am i to you? - A Voltron fic I basically made because I was in copium mode thinking that Adam is actually alive.

*

link to my ao3 profile

[kaylorrehabcenter]

Rating Every Song on Fearless Based on How Gay it is

Hello friends! I still have a few song analyses in the pipeline (and one on Lover the album) but today in honor of Fearless (Taylor’s Edition) being announced and Love Story being released in a few hours I thought I’d do something fun to celebrate!

And you know what? Fuck my usual disclaimer, I am the word of god here. Try and change my mind about any of these. I dare you. (I kid I kid this isn’t that serious and you’re free to disagree <3)

1. Fearless 15/10

Everything about this song is so fucking gay oh my god. This isn’t a fruit, this is a whole ass edible arrangement. As a small rural town Gay (my hometown has a population of less that 4,000 and where I’m living now has a population of 2,500) this uh. Hits.

“And I don't know how it gets better than this/You take my hand and drag me head first, fearless”

Y’ALL

The idea of falling in love with someone who makes you less afraid of your homophobic small town…….it’s getting to me.

“My hands shake, I'm not usually this way but/You pull me in and I'm a little more brave/It's the first kiss, it's flawless, really something/It's fearless”

This is making me emotional, I'll be honest. I see so much of my friends and my experience in high school in this song. 

This quote I found on genius is from when the album was released on BMR’s website.

“When I wrote ‘Fearless,’ I wasn’t dating anyone. I wasn’t even in the beginning stages of dating anybody. I really was all by myself out on tour and I got this idea for a song about the best first date. I think sometimes when you’re writing love songs, you don’t write them about what you’re going through at the moment, you write about what you wish you had. So, this song is about the best first date I haven’t had yet.”

This just screams baby Tay writing gay folklore to me, about the gay stories she wish she had. Notice how there are no pronouns in this song??? Fruity I’m telling you.

All that to say. I’m crying because the linear note says “I loved you before I met you” and I want to go listen to Long Story Short and cry now.

2. Fifteen 1/10

Objectively pretty straight as she’s singing about her and Abigail’s dating boys in HS. And Taylor got with a senior guy. Good for her I suppose.

Unless he was one of the shitty ones in which case.

“This is life before you know who you're gonna be”

This however, is a cute line and the whole song makes me warm and nostalgic. You can also hear her crying after the line “and Abigail gave everything she had to a boy who changed his mind” which makes me emo and I’m sure will take on new depth after Abigail’s divorce and hurt me even more.

Other highlights that make me sob include.

“When all you wanted was to be wanted/Wish you could go back and tell yourself what you know now/Back then I swore I was gonna marry him someday/But I realized some bigger dreams of mine”

Bigger dreams of hers indeed :’)

(Also how can you say she’s a gold star lesbian when this song exists. She was obviously dating boys in high school and even if you think she’s a lesbian. Comp het is a hell of a drug kids.)

3. Love Story 8/10

Tried to change the ending indeed.

This is THE Taylor Swift song, and maybe it’s the nostalgia talking but damn I still love it. Written because she wanted to change the ending of Romeo and Juliet (how anyone likes RandJ enough to want to rewrite I have no clue.) and/or because her parents didn’t approve of a guy she was seeing. (according to genius, it would’ve been too early for Joe J so it could possibly be Boys Like Girls frontman, his image did clash with hers and they did release some cute songs together. However if you want my take it’s probably folklore about Emily, take for what you will)

This song has very oft gay vibes with the ‘They don’t approve of our love angle!’ but uses male pronouns so points redacted for that. HOWEVER this is a very early use of ~the male perspective~ in Taylor’s songs and for that it deserves all the love.

“ So I sneak out to the garden to see you/We keep quiet, 'cause we're dead if they knew/So close your eyes/Escape this town for a little while”

More rural town angst!!!

Nothing gets me more than rural town angst.

“Romeo, save me, they're trying to tell me how to feel/This love is difficult, but it's real”

Originally the lyric was “this love is different”. Granted I do not remember the source, i’s just lore implanted into my brain, but make of that what you will.

“"Marry me, Juliet, you'll never have to be alone/I love you, and that's all I really know/I talked to your dad, go pick out a white dress/It's a love story, baby, just say "Yes"”

Marry me Juliet from the male perspective :)

Also worth noting. This is Karlie’s (and Kim K’s lmao) favorite Taylor song which. While basic as hell. Makes this cover sad as hell to this former Kaylor. (thanks @swiftgron-get-married for the tears <3)

Also not to make this about a man AGAIN but the secret message is “Some day I’ll find this” AND SHE DID IM CRYING.

4. Hey Stephen 1/10

The one thing Camilla Cabello and I have in common is loving this song, so I have to live with that for the rest of my life.

This song is very painfully straight.

How can you think this woman is a gold star lesbian.

The only noteworthy thing is that this is one of the few songs she confirms who it’s about. The secret message is “Love and Theft” which is the name of a country music duo who went on to open her Fearless tour. Which, does make me side eye this song a little bit.

Still a cute song.

“Hey Stephen, boy, you might have me believing/I don't always have to be alone”

5. White Horse 1/10

Oh look. It’s track five. 

You know maybe this is just me being a bitch but in my ranking of track fives this is. Pretty low. Maybe on the bottom.

Like I don’t have a lot to say about it. 

She’s going through it over a guy. He was a cheating dickweazel. 

“'Cause I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale/I'm gonna find someone someday/Who might actually treat me well”

“Try and catch me now, oh/It's too late/To catch me now”

These lines hit though!!

And she found Joe!! Who treats her well!!!! And she isn’t the princess, she’s the prince who dropped her sword and knocked on her door!!! But this time if they come for them she’s ready!!!

Yes I will make every song about Long Story Short <3

6. You Belong With Me 5/10

Ah yes. The other THE Taylor Swift song.

You know. If I went to a high school with a cheerleading squad. And I had a crush on a cheerleader. I would blast this song. So for that it gets a 5/10. Otherwise. Fairly straight and fairly iconic.

7. Breathe 8/10

Well. We know this one is about a woman. (Emily Poe for those not in the know. Ha. A rhyme!) That alone has an 8/10. And it’s the first time she has a featured artist so bonus points for that!

It was nominated for a Grammy and it fucking lost to Jason Mraz. When’s the last time you thought about Jason Mraz.

I will not have Kaylor feels on a fucking Fearless song but damn is it VERY easy.

“Never a clean break, no one here to save me/You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand”

“It's 2 A.M, feeling like I just lost a friend/Hope you know it's not easy, easy for me”

Also this bridge? Goes off. HIGHLY underrated. 

8. Tell Me Why 3/10

You know. Maybe this album isn’t as gay as I once thought.

This song does bop though, not as good as her other angry songs on this album. But I can vibe with this you know. Why are you being an asshole mysterious man.

“You could write a book on how to ruin someone's perfect day”

This has to be one of baby Tay’s best burns. Damn. 

“Why do you have to make me feel small/So you can feel whole inside?/Why do you have to put down my dreams/So you're the only thing on my mind?”

Men ain’t shit kids. However, bonus points for the shade. 

9. You’re not Sorry 1/10

Ok, ok. Maybe this was a foolish endeavor.

Because yet again we have a very straight song. A good song. That was on Taylor’s episode of CSI. But oh dear. Very straight. Gets a measly one point. We started this post off so very very gay but damn. We seem to be nearing the end on a very straight note.

10. The Way I Loved You 20/10

Hey Remember what I said about this album being very straight.

WELL THAT WAS A LIE.

Is this a comphet album or am I projecting.

This is one of my favorite baby gay Taylor songs. Her masterful use of pronouns (he is sensible! And so incredible! And all my single friends are jealous! But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain, when it was two am and I was cursing your name!) makes the other person she’s singing about completely vague, while we know she isn’t happy with whichever guy she’s dating.

Mayhaps an early reaction to PRomances?

Either way this song is so good, truly an underrated gay gem I mean. Look at it.

“Breaking down and coming undone/It's a roller coaster kind of rush/And I never knew I could feel that much/And that's the way I loved you”

AND THE BRIDGE. Do all of her gay songs just have kickass bridges?

“He can't see the smile I'm faking/And my heart's not breaking/'Cause I'm not feeling anything at all/And you were wild and crazy/Just so frustrating/Intoxicating, complicated/Got away by some mistake and now…”

Damn. I’m imaging this with 2020 vocals and fucking ascending.

Also please watch the live performance of it from the Fearless tour. It’s such a damn shame this got cut from the movie and some woman in the front row is wearing a cowboy hat. Everyone is holding up those cameras everyone had to have before smartphones. Taylor is being endearing. It’s a good time.

11. Forever and Always 6/10

Bonus points for the ~drama~ of it all. Added last minute to the album? The iconic throwing of the chair in live performances?? All of it very dramatique and for that we stan.

Still pretty straight.

Also Joe Jonas responded to the song and why do I find his response so damn funny. “It’s part of being a musician, I guess. You write songs about each other.”

This is another song where the idea of Taylor’s grown up vocals on this is………..whew

12. The Best Day 0/10

This gets zero points because it’s about her literal mom.

Still makes me cry.

God bless Andrea Swift indeed

13. Change 13/10

We start the official tracklist with a gay song. We end it with a gay song.

We will ignore that it was originally written for Scott and BMR and instead induct it into the hall of gay pride anthems, as it should be. 

“We're getting stronger now, finding things they never found/They might be bigger but we're faster and never scared/You can walk away, say we don't need this/But there's something in your eyes says we can beat this”

“This revolution, the time will come/For us to finally win/And we'll sing hallelujah, we'll sing hallelujah”

The music video is cringe though lol

14. Jump then Fall 10/10

This song is gay because I choose it to be. <3

Like. Picture baby Taylor writing this song and playing it on her guitar to a girl she has a crush on telling her that she’ll protect her and they’ll be safe and in love and happy together. Gah, maybe I’m ~projecting~ but this sweet ass song always gets me and is EASILY in my top five Taylor songs. Super underrated and hecking cute. 

“We're on the phone and without a warning/I realize your laugh is the best sound/I have ever heard”

Like. Look at this shit.

“I watch you talk, you didn't notice/I hear the words but all I can think is/We should be together”

Tell me this is about the first time you get a crush on a girl and she’s your best friend and she’s amazing and beautiful and you realize you kinda want to kiss her and you hope she wants to kiss you too.

“I had time to think it oh, over/And all I can say is come closer/Take a deep breath and jump then fall into me”

And she’s the Romeo who's going to protect her!!!!! She’s the knight in shining armor in this song and I love that for her??

“The bottom's gonna drop out from under our feet/I'll catch you, I'll catch you/When people say things that bring you to your knees/I'll catch you/The time is gonna come when you're so mad you could cry/But I'll hold you through the night until you smile”

I won’t divulge into full on analysis here because. This is what this post is about but PLEASE listen to this song more. It’s such a gay little gem.

15. Untouchable 9/10

How does she make a cover sound gay.

It sounds so gay.

“You got to come on, come on, say that we'll be together/Come on, come on, little taste of heaven”

Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay

16. Forever and Always Piano Version 1/10

This song gets 1/10 because I don’t like it. There. I said it.

17. Come in With the Rain 3/10

I can see why this is a bonus track. It doesn’t hit me as much as the other songs on the album.

But damn if I don’t want to scream sing this one driving down a high way.

18. Superstar 7/10

You can’t tell me this song is about a man. I simply won’t entertain the idea.

You cannot prove to me that this song is about a man. There is not a male pronoun in sight. 

>:)

19. The Other Side of the Door 6/10

Is this song about having a fight about being in the closet? Probably not. Will my gay little brain make it about that? Yep!

And that, funky little queer pals, is my gay rating of every Fearless song. Like and subscribe, #t3atmidnight

[radley-writes]

Halo! hope you dont mind me asking. do you have any editing tips you would be willing to share? or resources one might use to begin learning how to edit effectively? if not that is cool! thank you

Oho! Great question. Editing is by far my favourite part of the writing process. I’ll grit my teeth through a first draft, but I thrive on those long months of turd-polishing that follow, when I can watch my novel become increasingly shiny. 

Of course, my tips are peculiar to me. If they work for you - great! If not - also great!!

You’ve got to find your own path. Nevertheless, I hope this gives you a place to start in figuring out your preferred editorial method...

Excuse me if this is scattered, I’m sneakily typing it out on the clock...

My first tip is to give yourself time between writing and editing. 

Unless I have a very clear view of a major rewrite (in which case, I go back and edit as part of the first draft) I try and leave at least a month between slapping down a completed draft and delving back into it. 

Let those words marinate!! You want to return to your manuscript with a fresh enough view that you can look past the writing (which, if your first drafts are anything like mine, will be uniformly shite) and focus on the bigger picture. How your story structure holds together; how your character arcs progress. 

Leading on from this - I try to edit my novels over several different ‘passes’, not all in one. 

1 x edit for big structural changes, with as many scrappy rewrites as necessary to capture the essence of both plot and emotional journey. 

1 x edit for character voice, adding quirks, focusing on my MC’s perspective, what makes them truly unique.

1 x edit for tidying prose, polishing sentences, adding flair and comedy.

My writing tends to be funny (or at least, I try to make it funny, and either it’s working or everyone’s lying lmao) but half of my Crowning Moments of Snark don’t appear until the third draft! Comedians practice for ages to flesh out their jokes. It’s the same in writing - a funny, engaging voice isn’t something that just comes naturally. Even if it does, you have to work hard to reach its full potential.

After that, I tend to fling a novel at Betas/my agent and spend the next approximate million drafts working through their feedback and honing everything to a nice, sharp edge.

So I suppose my other big chunk of advice is: Don’t force yourself into getting everything done in a single editorial pass! I personally find that approach waaaaaaaaay too overwhelming. I use and abuse the ‘comments’ function on Microsoft Word - if I spot something I want to change on a future draft, I scribble it down in the margins and keep moving.

This gives me the impetus to chew through my manuscript again and again, rather than getting bogged down by that ol’ Executive Dysfunction chestnut of ‘I have too many things to focus on at once so I shall sit in a corner and do none of them’. 

One last weird thing that helps me... Between every major draft, I change the font. 

Typically sans-serif to serif and back again, ad infinitum/nauseum. And that’s not all. I fuck about with the column width, indent size, everything - it tricks my brain into seeing the draft as a ‘new thing’, even when I’ve read every sentence a thousand times!

Hope that helps, and best of luck with the editing!