#(a little over a year but we didn't talk often until recently)

[osaemu]

nobody asked about my love life but here it is anyways

[skvaderarts]

You guys want to hear something really funny?

I've been slowly showing my almost 80 year old grandma Arcane recently and she absolutely adores Viktor and Jayce, but especially Viktor. She's made me replay the part where Viktor made his speech to Jayce when he stopped him from jumping in season one like 10 times, she loves the "I'm from the undercity" part, she started crying when he ran across that bridge, and she looked physically devastated when she thought he was going to step off that ledge after Sky died and kept quietly repeating "no no honey no" over and over again and looked away from the screen until Jayce showed up and she literally sighed in relief when they started talking. She's actively upset that she can't adopt child Viktor because she said, and I quote "He would have loved Legos" and "has such sad pretty brown eyes". She has started making jokes about the "wait, this isn't my bedroom" line when she goes places in our house (much to my mom's confusion because she hasn't seen the show yet and can clearly tell she's missing out on an inside joke because we keep laughing so hard about it) and every time that Jayce says "partners" she just goes "uh-huh" and laughs a little. It's deeply funny.

Well, tonight I made a joke on a discord call with a friend about Viktor and Jayce and I said "The question isn't IF their fucking it's who's fucking who" and my grandma, in the background, completely unprompted just said "Oh, Viktor is obviously the one taking charge in that situation. Look how he looks at him and touches him. Jayce is a puppy. He's gonna do whatever Viktor wants."

And I don't think I have ever laughed harder at anything she's ever said in my whole goddamn life. I didn't realize she was on team Jayvik THAT HARD LMFAO. My grandma is part of Viktor Nation.

W GRANDMA!

Side note:

She loves the soundtrack. She doesn't understand how music streaming works so I basically had to make a playlist that just plays What Could've Been, The Line, Remember Me, Blood, Sweat, and Tears, and Enemy on loop for her. She likes bass, what can I say lol! She has good taste. I expect nothing less from the woman who wants me to take her to a Hozier concert next year 😭 She also likes What Have They Done To Us and Guns for Hire but said she can't listen to them as often because it makes her too sad lol she's real for that.

... She also loves Isha... She doesn't know yet. She's gonna be so sad.

[allpiesforourown]

Roommate Binghe would absolutely make the most insanely hilarious Reddit thread that’s so out of touch with reality. I can just hear the comments begging him to give the woman he dates a break and just bend over and fuck his roommate already

That thought is literally what inspired this au for me in my head I had this idea of binghe saying "am I the asshole for not picking my BEST FRIEND OF TEN YEARS over a woman I've been dating for two weeks?" And it's one of those aita posts that have a deceptive title because everyone reads that and goes of course not! Then the actual post is this:

"I (21M) met my best friend (22M) when I was 11 and he was 12. I used to be really weak and scrawny back then, and he saw me getting bullied at the playground and became the first person who ever stood up for me. After that he asked his parents to hire my mom and we could finally move out of poverty. She was really sick at the time and getting a better paying job really helped her get better. I'm saying all this to show how important he is to me and why anyone should understand that he'll always be the most important person in the world to me.

He's also a bit sickly. Nothing severe but he has asthma and picks up illnesses way easier than most people, so I often take care of him.

Recently he said he wanted to meet my girlfriend, so I agreed the three of us should have dinner together at a nice restaurant. She was weirdly quiet the whole time, staring at the two of us talk. When we left it was late, and the night air was making him shiver, so I gave gege my jacket. I thought we'd all head our separate ways from there but my girlfriend got super moody and said it was my job to drive her back too?? I said "I'm not making gege walk back because you want me to drive you home" and she was about to yell at me when gege stepped between us and said I can drop her off and then take us home. It was annoying because she lives in the opposite direction but I agreed.

When we got to her apartment, instead of saying thanks and leaving, she said she wants to talk to me. Obviously I didn't want to leave my friend alone in the car, but he just smiled and said I should say goodnight to my girlfriend. He's always very sweet and indulgent to the people I date, to the point it's a little frustrating.

Once we were alone, she blew up at me, claiming I ignored her all evening. She got mad at me, saying that gege was wearing jeans and a full sleeve shirt while she was wearing a short dress and I gave my jacket to him instead. I explained to her that his immune system is weak so if he caught a chill he'd be sick way longer than if she got a cold.

That was our first argument. She got over it in a few days. but I didn't want her around gege anymore lest she said something about me "picking him over her" and made him feel guilty for no reason.

Afterwards she invited me to be her plus one at her cousin's wedding. I said I'd go but just two days before gege got really sick. I said I'd stay with him, but he insisted I go to the wedding and he'd get someone else to look after him. He mentioned this guy who I absolutely hate and that's when I knew I couldn't leave him in anyone else's care.

Gege's friend is a terrible influence on him. He's an idiot with no brain and a creep who clearly wants to take advantage of him. I absolutely could not leave the two of them alone when he was so vulnerable so I refused to leave him alone even for a few hours. Gege was too feverish to remember the wedding after the first day so he didn't say anything about it.

I was so busy taking care of him, I forgot to tell her I wouldn't be able to come to the wedding. I didn't bother picking up my phone until gege was back on his feet and saw about 50 missed calls all from her. When I called her back she was screaming so loud, gege could hear her even though she wasn't on speaker. After I hung up on her, he looked so sad and said he was sorry for being the reason I couldn't go. I told him I didn't even want to go and it was just her cousin, but for the last week he's had a perpetual frown on his usually smiling face. I feel so terrible. I want to tell him it's not his fault, of course I'd choose his HEALTH over a date, but he's really beating himself up about it... I hate that I made him feel that way.

Top comment: THAT'S THE PART YOU FEEL GUILTY FOR???? THAT YOUR GEGE FEELS BAD????????? NOT HOW YOU MISTREATED YOUR POOR GIRLFRIEND?????

Second comment: just fuck your best friend instead of making her suffer bro 😭😭

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

You don't need to worry about the ATSV fandom dying. As someone whose been in the Marvel fandom over ten years - I can assure you this is natural.

The ATSV Fandom Isn't Dead: A brief look into the science of fandoms.

[me standing beside Hobie beaming my thoughts of love and adoration into his head like I'm professor x]

A lot of people are afraid of the ATSV dying - and I don't blame them.

In the era of shows releasing all in one day, or movies coming to streaming almost immediately - it's not hard to say we're in an era were content is consumed at ridiculously rapid rates.

I mean, this time last year Wednesday was breaking records on Netflix. Where's the hype now?

I know you see it too, there's less posts everyday in the Hobie tag, less screenshot breakdowns, etc etc etc.

But I'm here to tell you - The ATSV fandom is doing just fine. Better than fine. All of this is meant to happen.

Let me put it into perspective.

ATSV released on June 2nd - it's November.

ATSV released a little over six months ago.

For reference: The Avengers (2012) was released on May 4th.

The Avengers DVD wasn't available for purchase until SEPTEMBER 25th - almost SIX months later.

The time that the Hobie fandom has formed and existed - is the same amount of time people had to wait just to see The Avengers again.

Large periods of time where tags only get three posts a day TOPS was nothing to fear. xReaders and fanfics held the fandom over until the next trailer, the next sneak peek or leak.

Prior to the release of streaming, only a little more than ten years ago - it was NATURAL for a fandom to wait six months before even seeing the movie for a second time.

And mind you - streaming didn't exist. If you wanted to see The Avengers again, you had to go out and BUY it. $26.99.

If you wanted to order it online - you'd have to get it shipped to you. Before Disney plus, we watched on BlueRay Discs.

And the fandom was fine and healthy.

If a fandom that doesn't even have a DVD release can keep up content for six months, I think we'll be fine.

But I'll admit - there's still the question:

If the ATSV fandom is 'doing fine' then where is everyone going? Why are the tags getting slower?

The answer is simple:

FANDOM BIOLOGY

I LOVE social sciences and the systems people create and how they work - even unintentionally.

And I have a theory - one about the natural evolution and regeneration of fandom. Hear me out -

When it comes to ATSV:

We are leaving the Analysation Phase, the phase in which content creation is centered around deciphering and breaking down the most recent installment in the fandom.

During this phase usually see art of newer characters, new ships, meta breakdowns, easter egg point-outs.

We were in that phase.

Once the Analysation Phase dies down, usually main content creators may remain. The intermediate or liminal period.

The intermediate is usually when you'll see more x-reader art pop-up, the levels of fanart evening out as artists return to their favorite characters - usually incorporating any new ones they gained from the last installment.

Shitposts usually also become popular around this time, as the shock and weight of the story wear off, and we're more able to joke about the storyline a lot more light-heartedly.

That's why the intermediate point is often see as the passion 'dying out'.

When in fact, it is the fandom getting comfortable. Resting for the next phase.

And after a few months, the next phase comes:

The Speculation Phase:

The Speculation Phase cannot come until the Analysation Phase is over.

During the Analysation Phase the fandom begins to breakdown and digest the writers intentions. They integrate the new character into the story, and the fandom.

As the audience and fandom talk amongst each other, we get more solid ideas of who the characters are, what their motivations might be, and most important of all-

What they might do.

In the Speculation Phase we turn from the last installment - and start looking towards the future.

Let's take Hobie for example.

Looking at the timeline of the Hobie fandom, we can see a progression.

Originally taken as a punk-rockstar and little more, throughout the months the fandom began posting things about punk culture, the 70's, Hobie's motivation in the comics, and how that all correlates to him.

As the fandom analyzed, the collective zeitgeist and understanding of Hobie grew into something a lot more sound, and telling.

We looked at the parellels he provides in the story, and what kind of person he is.

And because if that we have seen a marked improvement in people's contextual understanding of Hobie - as a punk and a hero.

And now that we can understand him - we can predict him.

The same goes for Miguel - over the months, a lot of us have began to question if we know him as well as we think we do , if we really know the kinda person he is -

And if we really know what he's doing to do.

That's where the Speculation Phase comes in.

The Speculation Phase in fandom is when we see some of the most passion - and instead of tapering off overtime, it builds. More and more until the next release.

The Speculation Phase is when the fandom takes the analysis' and from there, they begin to theorize.

Now that we understand, we can begin to predict.

And this is arguably one of the most interesting parts in a fandoms natural ecosystem.

During the Speculation Phase, we can see a number of diverse opinions appear.

As more and more creators begin to gather their understanding, tips from the writers, new released news, and past comic book arcs, we start to see dozens of triguing paths the writers can take us on.

As more news releases, the more hype people get. I mean - imagine how you'll feel when they release the first new poster of Hobie, or Miles? Or when we get to see Miles.G in the trailer?

And with each new poster, or trailer, we're given clues. The theorizes develop more. And the plot thickens.

It's all natural.

So I can understand the fear. Only getting one or two new posts when you visit the Hobie tag can be a bummer. But it's natural and it's GOOD.

Y'all, we need to conserve our energy. We are in the liminal phase. And they never last long.

With the news of the voice actors back in the studio, and a cliff-hanger like we have - I can assure you, it's only a matter of time before we begin to see the theories, the trailer breakdowns, the people guessing what Miguel might do, or exactly how much tech Hobie is hiding.

And when that time comes we need to be READY. I can already feel it on the horizon.

I really wonder what they'll do with all that left over Hobie concept art.

Plus with explosion of Hobie approval, I wonder if they'll add him in even more. Hobie fan-service anyone?

Hmmm...

But chill y'all, we're on the right track -

-------------------------------------

If you read this far, as always THANK YOU SO MUCH!! And as a token of my appreciation, I hand you this Hobie. Hold him gently please

Bye 💗

[accio-victuuri]

xiao zhan elle september issue cover story

Xiao Zhan believes in simplicity. But in acting, he increasingly likes multi-faceted and complex characters.In other words, this is an authentic state of human existence. At a time when everything is being simplified, Be willing to admit that people are different,Seek communication possibilities, Be sensitive and defend complexity, This must require love and courage.

01.

After entering the entertainment industry, these things quickly became part of his daily life - cameras, spotlights, display screens, shields. Due to his profession and popularity, countless "Xiao Zhan" have emerged, including huge portraits on the facades of high-end shopping malls, the projections of an astonishing number of fans, or the appearance of characters in the film and television dramas that have been released one after another.

Right now, in the dressing room after the shooting, Xiao Zhan is holding his box of whole grain salad, vividly imitating the scene of meeting director Zheng Xiaolong.

"I was a little confused, so I asked the director whether he wanted me to be thinner or stronger. He said, 'Thinner, of course thinner, it will look so good and sharp.'" After a while, when we were taking the final photos, Zheng Xiaolong saw him again, "He said, 'Wow, you look good like this.'" From then until now, he has lost more than ten pounds.

Xiao Zhan, the source of all fission, is decent and relaxed. The glamour seen by the outside world is an added value for him. Sometimes he even forgets about it, "Really no one will care about you." Then he continues to talk about his work.

The most recent one is "Legend of the Hidden Sea", which was filmed in Hengdian for 5 months. The previous one, which also took 5 months to shoot, was "The Legend of the Condor Heroes: The Greatest Hero" directed by Tsui Hark. This is often the case with large-scale movies and long TV series. Once you join the crew, it takes four or five months. In 2022, his main filming work was "Where Dreams Begin" and "Sunshine by my Side", in 2021 it was "Yu Gu Yao", in 2020 it was "Ace Troops", and in 2019 it was "Douluo Dalu" and "Oath of Love".

There are constant offers for plays, so sometimes I can’t decide whether to lengthen or shorten the time between plays.

In the second half of 2019, when filming "Oath of Love", Xiao Zhan filmed during the day and recorded the variety show "Our Song" at night. Both were very challenging. The former was his first time to play the leading role in an urban drama, with little experience and great pressure; the latter was difficult because of the harmony, "You have to memorize all the harmonies that are different from the tune of the song and not be carried away."

"At that time, I felt it didn't matter. I would sleep for an hour or two and wake up feeling healthy again. But now my mind says it doesn't matter, but my body is protesting."

This year, he was filming in Hengdian. Later, one day, he found that his tonsils were inflamed and swallowing was very painful, but he went to work as usual. It was not until the director came over and asked him, "What's wrong with your eyes?" that he saw his eyes swollen in the mirror. By the afternoon, "I looked like a frog."

He had to go to the hospital. The symptoms themselves were common and could be stopped by taking medicine. But what he couldn't do was exactly what the doctor advised most: you need to rest.

More importantly, "My perception will become dull. I am really afraid of this, afraid of becoming mechanical and formulaic." He put the emphasis on the word "really". He chatted with his seniors, "They also said that you have to live and experience life."

In fact, a life in the spotlight is somewhat contrary to the life of ordinary people, but the profession of an actor requires him to touch as many wrinkles of life as possible.

A while ago, he watched a monologue in a variety show that depicted the current workplace situation of young people. Before entering the entertainment industry, Xiao Zhan had a studio and worked. He could understand the depression brought by work, but the new vocabulary and new tools that appeared in the workplace weakened his sense of resonance. He found that he was gradually disconnected to a certain extent.

02.

In early June, Xiao Zhan had a short vacation and went back to his hometown Chongqing. He likes to take walks very much, and one night he walked for several hours, visiting the old street, Jiefangbei, and the place where he used to work.

In 2014, 23-year-old Xiao Zhan graduated from university and worked as a designer in a design studio. Every weekday morning, he would transfer from Line 2 to Line 3 at Niujiaotuo Station, push through the crowds, and squeeze onto the light rail. Several times, he was pressed so hard that his face was pressed against the glass window.

He simply leaned against the glass to look at the Jialing River below, the strange reefs exposed in the dry season and the various people, some swimming in winter, some jogging, some fishing, with a very optimistic spirit.

He still likes to observe the people around him——

"Why are you still here so late?"

"People walking hurriedly must have just got off work and are in a hurry to go home. Their expressions and behaviors are just like when I used to catch the subway. It's the last one and you have to run. They are very panicked. Some takeaway guys are rushing forward regardless of their own safety. There are also some very leisurely people who sit there drinking beer, and then go home and start a new day."

"Everyone has their own wonderful story. It is everyone's life that makes up our society. So it's wonderful. Everyone is the protagonist. We are all filming our own biographies. What will the story of tomorrow be like?"

At that moment, he was like all those who have been busy working in a foreign country for a long time, and finally found that "I haven't been here for a long time, and there have been quite a lot of changes." "In fact, I am not particularly happy, and I don't have any other feelings. I am living, that's all."

Two and a half days later, Xiao Zhan left Chongqing for work and returned to Beijing, then to Shanghai, and then to France. This time he also called his parents. This was a long-awaited family trip, from France to Switzerland and back to France in a week. Every detail of the trip was magnified, their happiness, quarrels, or just ordinary walks, "all very vivid."

On the day they parted, they finished their meal at a restaurant in the south of France. The car that came to pick him up arrived and he had to leave first. Before leaving, his mother hugged him and told him to take care of himself. Rarely, his father also hugged him awkwardly.

"I used to think that work was everything and life wasn't that important. It was nothing more than having a place to sleep, getting up, going to work, finishing work, and resting. But now that my parents are older and I haven't lived with them for a long time, you feel as if each other's lives, even family members, are getting further and further apart." He especially doesn't want this to happen.

The way to avoid suspension and regain a sense of reality in life is not difficult to say. "When you have time, go out and take a look. The important thing is to feel life and the world. Even if it is something terrible or cruel, it is life, and it will burst out with energy when you need it."

03.

Halfway through the interview, Xiao Zhan suddenly said that he had a conflicting attitude towards long interviews. On the one hand, he was worried that he was not growing enough and would appear timid during the conversation. On the other hand, he wanted to unearth some subtle feelings through the conversation because he felt he was not good at recording them in words.

Observation, feeling, understanding and expression are the key to an actor's creativity.

"Dialogue is also muscle memory." Xiao Zhan said, "Although I am very i, I am not autistic. Because I think actors need to learn to express, express your inner thoughts, and digest the content handed to you by the other party."

Before the filming of "Sunshine by my Side" began, he met with the main creators and held several script meetings to deepen their understanding of each other and the characters. In the early stage of "Legend of the Hidden Sea", the producer also mentioned that he would discuss the script in detail and talk about a scene with many of his own understandings.

Xiao Zhan is not a professional actor. When he first entered the industry and filmed "Fights Break Sphere" and "The Wolf", he had strong doubts and asked himself, am I suitable for this? Constantly denying and overthrowing himself made him lose confidence.

Sometimes he is asked what he would be doing now if he had not participated in the talent show, debuted, or entered the entertainment industry at the age of 23. He has thought about it, but he has not looked back.

If you can't act well, then spend extra time taking acting classes, watching the monitor more often, and asking seniors for advice. With your full strength and hard work, you will slowly find the way.

Later, when the filming of "Sunshine by my Side" started, Xiao Zhan played Xiao Chunsheng, a child of a Beijing compound, who was completely different from him, even his accent was very different. He felt insecure. Before filming many scenes, director Fu Ning ran over and whispered to him, Zhan Zhan, don't be afraid, just speak bravely, if you feel it, just say it, in fact, the audience can feel your emotions and what you want to express.

He also gradually gained more self-awareness: "Technique may not be my forte, it depends more on feelings. Only when I have my own feelings can I have the confidence to interpret it. If I rely purely on some techniques, I think it is not moving enough."

It has been 8 years since Xiao Zhan made his acting debut. Looking at his resume, he has played leading roles in various TV series and movies. But he still feels that he is a newcomer and hopes to work with more experienced production teams in the future.

He doesn't think too much, and he doesn't actually know the work plan divided by year very well. He only cares about what the work arrangements for the next stage are, rather than "asking about things too far ahead."

"I still feel like a child, but actually I'm not anymore. It seems like I'm still in high school, but actually I've grown up." A child's mind means having curiosity, desire to explore, and imagination.

He puts these curiosities and explorations into the characters. "I mean, for me, when I dig into the character's background and past, I discover the complexity and contradictions of the character as a person and present them. In this way, some of his choices and motivations may be understood by the audience, and the work may be good, and you will have the current audience, right?"

source

[thetourturedwritersclub]

Finis vitae sed non amoris-its the end of life but not of love

Chapter seven: March

March 1st 1977

Dear diary,

There is 30 minutes left on the clock until I meet James. In hindsight I shouldn't go. I should avoid him. But I can't. No matter how hard I try he is always there. I'm interested in what he has to say. Time is ticking. I got to go now.

Goodbye

R. A. B

March 4th 1977

Dear diary,

Well.

I did meet him. And let me just tell you how it went. So I went in the Room of Requirements and he was there waiting. He asked me if he did something wrong and why was I avoiding him. Truthfully the first part of the question was very unexpected.

I told him he didn't do anything wrong and I wasn't avoiding him but James being James didn't believe me. He kept asking me the same question over and over again why was I avoiding him. I refused to answer it the first 3 times he asked me. I didn't want to lie to him more that I had to.

Then I got annoyed. Why couldn't he drop it? Why couldn't he believe me? That's what I asked. His response : Reg I know you well enough to know that you are lying,so please just tell me the truth. In that moment the impulsive side of my brain took charge and I told him the truth. The actual truth.

It went something along the lines of : "You want the truth? Here's the truth James. I know you don't remember but during the New Year party we kissed and I haven't been able to forget it." and then he said something that shocked me: " I do remember."

The silence was loud. I asked him why didn't he bring it up. He said: I didn't want to make you feel bad. Then the silence stretched on. I asked him if he regretted it. He said no, with absolutely no hesitation. I don't either. I did ask him if he will keep the promise he made me that night. He said yes and kissed me and I kissed him back. That kiss was everything I ever wanted and more.

Goodbye for now

R. A. B

March 11th 1977

Dear diary,

Life has been good. Really good.There is still a piece missing in the puzzle of my life. A piece by the name of Sirius.I've had adventures with Barty, Evan, Cas and Panda. We investigated a graveyard nearby. Pandora tried to summon the dead but still it was fun.

I've met with James more often. In the Astronomy Tower , in the Room of Requirements. Those moments my favourites. On the 15th we're meant to go on a Hogsmead date. I'm excited.

Goodbye for now

R. A. B

March 15th 1977

Dear diary.

The date was really nice. I had so much fun. We went to The Three Broomsticks and got two Butterbeers. James leads me onto a field. Very ominous untill I see lanterns and a picnic blanket. It looked so beautiful. So picturesque.

We ate little sandwiches, saw the sunset, talked and cuddled. Everything was perfect.

R. A. B

March 23rd 1977

Dear diary,

Well. I told Pandora of the recent developments of my romantic situation and she was so shocked and happy. Don't worry Panda I was shocked too. I'm also very happy. She congratulated me and demanded me tell everything (in good Pandora fashion of course) and I did.

Goodbye for now

R. A. B

March 27th 1977

Dear diary,

I think this has been one of the best months of my life. I'm happy, I really am. All thanks to Jamie. I'm grateful for that and I'm grateful I get to date such an incredible person. I'm grateful for my friends for being there for me. Hopefully this continues,

Goodbye for now,

R. A. B

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm so sorry for how late this chapter came. I was suffering from Writers Block™️ and school has started which yall know is one of the worst combinations to humankind if ur trying to write anything at all. Anyway this fic will still be getting updates, but probably not on week days.

Fun fact I discovered that I have a very difficult time writing romantic scenes. So I apologise if the dialogue is overdone and cliché

The list of amazing ppl that wanted to be tagged(tell me if want me to tag u or if u want me to untag u) :

@raine-ray U were right

@ivy-is-chaos

@reddamselette

@permetutotheworld

@that-stressed-out-chic

@blurstardust

[shalomniscient]

TELL ME MORE ABOUT SEVCHINO LORE PLEASE🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

hello alba !!! i admit i haven't thought about canon-compliant sevchino in a long time...... but modern!au sevchino has been ping-ponging in my brain instead. this is about to be so delusional so bear with me ,,,,,,,,

i used to brainrot ceo!arle but then i was given the vision by apollo himself of pediatrics!arle and that has been how she appears to me ever since. i most definitely would not be working with her in the hospital because i was simply not built for the medical grind, though in an ideal world by the point arle becomes the head of pediatrics, i'd be at best an associate prof or at least an assistant prof of ecology, though on tenure track regardless. going into academia and teaching at a university level specifically has always appealed to me so i'm going to indulge a little hsdljfhslf

in modern!au i think arle and i would meet a lot later than in canon. i'd probably find her when we're both in uni, out under a tree somewhere near the campus and just staring at a particularly interesting spider. we would have a nerd to nerd moment and talk some shop about spiders or bugs in general until it becomes kind of a routine. the rest of the relationship would be a pretty linear and typical progression. we don't really go on regular dates because premed is ridiculously demanding, so most of the time it's good ol' study dates. i offer my arm or leg for her to draw all the various veins and arteries on when studying anatomy because her own limbs have that black tinge and she can't really see her own veins. despite that, i feel like arle's hands tend to run a little hot, like a noticeable kind of hot, which makes for excellent massages whenever i'm dying over a 3k word report.

anyway the university i would teach at would have an affiliated hospital, which is also the hospital arle works at. my schedule would definitely be more relaxed than hers, so i'd probably be the one crossing campus to meet up with her for lunch in her office if she's free. from my own experience, if you turn up at the hospital often enough people start to remember you and then you unlock the honorary staff member pass and can head in through the staff walkways. arle's office is professional most of the time, though i can tell if she's had a patient come through recently by the miscellaneous children's toys scattered on a section of the carpeted floor that she didn't clean up in time. she keeps a family picture on her desk, and in her drawer, tucked away in a large, meticulous file are nearly a hundred thank-you cards written by her patients that she's kept over the years.

arle definitely draws a few stares on the rare occasion she meets me at my office instead. funnily enough, i think it draws a bit of controversy with the students. arle doesn't wear her ring on the job (there's a risk of damaging it or accidentally hurting her patient, and the fact that wearing any sort of jewellery is generally discouraged when scrubbing up) while i do, so the students put 2 and 2 together and it's not a pretty picture. but things clear up when a student comes in for a thesis discussion and sees the wedding picture on my desk. it still makes for a funny story in hindsight though. in any case, arle is most certainly a local dilf, and if any of the sevchino kids are in university at this point they do NOT hear the end of it. arle always showing up in the labcoat-over-scrubs fit and somehow eating it up does not help.

we have a place close to campus, though with arle's salary as a department head we definitely also have a beach house. we'd go there on weekends when arle's not on call, and it's her time to unwind. she'll wake up early just to spend the dawn on the deck and watch the sunrise over the ocean before crawling back into bed. i am still in charge of breakfast though because arle would make toast and steak tartare, and while it is certainly tasty it is also generally not a breakfast food. anyway, long walks on the beach in the morning, evening or night are definitely a must. it's nothing special, just walking and talking. sometimes it's just quiet, but it works for both of us. OH and arle 100% does her fuckass hand fishing nonsense...... i could tell her i plan to cook fish tonight and she'll look up from her newspaper, nod, change into a pair of swim shorts, leave, then come back with like. a whole ass flounder. do i grill her a little for going out and just grabbing fish? yes. do i still give her a thank you kiss? also yes.

ok it's. 0100 and i need sleep for the gym grind tmrw so i will end it here but this brainrot goes DEEP i fear........................ my chronic inability to stfu is rattling around in my skull like a terrible creature and i fear it will return 😔😔😔 tqsm for the question though, i really enjoyed answering it !!

[sparrowrye]

Demi Demon || Alastor x Reader, A2 part 1

Synopsis: It’s been over a year since we were brought under Alastor’s watchful eye. We’ve unlocked our Demonic powers, discovered our own talents, and began building the Safe Haven with Charlie and co. Alastor seems increasingly interested in the power we hold as one and intends to use it properly.

Previous part

Act 2, Part 1: a teacher

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Safe Haven was only known through word of mouth. The group had managed to convince some Demons already in Hell to return to the surface where they would be safe. They seemed to regret their decision upon realizing Alastor was involved.

The children were becoming increasingly difficult to handle. They were getting bored and started fighting with each other at random because they had nothing else to do and that was all they knew how to do. So I paired them up with an adult and instructed them to make sure they didn't get hurt and to help in any way. I turned it into a game and told them they had to report back to me every finite detail about the day.

The teenagers seemed obsessed with me. Whenever they weren't doing something they were out looking for me. At first they gave each other space when one of them was talking with me, but now they often sat around each other as if they weren't there. They were starting to be okay with one another.

The Safe Haven was well underway with construction. The grand hall had been built first with lots of upper windows and a large kitchen in the back. The roads were being flattened and paved with smooth stone. It was a rough start but at least it was one.

Alastor had recently gotten into the habit of staring at me again. Though this time he was being a little more obvious about it. It made the teenagers unsettled so I often tried to use illusion magic to hide us from him when they wanted to talk to me. The rest of the time he was within hearing distance when I was interacting with the younger children.

I had figured out my tolerance for meat fairly quickly. I could go three days before I started to get pains. Alastor always had a snide remark when I asked him for it. He would put a hand on my shoulder and soak in our combined magic until I had eaten it. It was a trade off.

"You know..." He had both claws on my shoulder as he leaned down so his head was level with mine again. I hated when he stood behind me but it seemed like his favorite spot. "We'll need to begin your training again soon. It's been far too long since our last session." He pressed through my shields but I kept myself in reality.

"I'm busy," was all I could manage.

"I don't intend to pull you away from your precious little devils for long." He pushed his cheek against mine as his presence reached all the way to my toes.

"They're getting worse with every day." I swallowed the last of the meat and stepped away from him to cut the connection. "I'm essentially raising twenty-eight children." I hadn't realized how much I would need to look after the children once we saved them from the ring fights. It made sense how overrun orphanages could lose sight of a few.

"They seem to be doing just fine," he rested his arms behind his back.

"I'm breaking up fights left and right. The adults aren't helping, either." I left the kitchen to stand on the porch. Alastor followed and stood a hair beside me.

"Perhaps they need someone else to look after them," he said.

"I won't pull any of them away from each other." I watched as Angel practically wrapped himself around Husker. He growled at the white and pink Demon as if he hated it, but I could tell from his lack of shoving that he didn't mind it. He hadn't noticed that I had been avoiding him for awhile, now. Alastor looked at me sideways, his mind ticking away.

"I find it hard to believe," he started, "that there isn't a Persecuted teacher in need of somewhere safe to stay. It would take some time off your hands." His eyes followed my gaze and landed on a trio of teenagers talking and casting glances up at us. "And...give you more time to spend with those unruly teenagers."

I huffed a chuckle. "They're only unruly if you piss them off. Which is easy to do."

"You seem to do that the least."

"No, I'm sure I piss them off. But I'm the only one who understands the shi---the things they went through." I casted a glance up at him but he didn't make a remark on my curse. For once we were having a calm, normal conversation and I didn't want to ruin it.

"Fair enough. Regardless, providing the little devils with a teacher to keep them busy during the day would aid everyone, not just you."

A thought came to mind as he looked out at the construction. "Why are you okay with them building the Safe Haven here?"

"Hmm?" He looked at me sideways.

"Surely you wouldn't want anyone to hold anything against you. Wouldn't having a Safe Haven to protect do just that?"

"Hardly. Not many people cross me to begin with so I'm always hunting for my--our--next meal. Having a target on this town will bring the food right to us."

I looked down at my hands. I hated what I had become so I constantly wore my Human form, especially in front of the children. It made me more approachable and relatable.

"It also negates having to teleport from here to the town. I have more accessibility to you."

"You hardly have that as is." I brushed past him, careful not to actually touch him, and walked across the grass to the trio of teenagers.

****

The woman burst through her apartment door and slammed it shut. She dove for the partly packed suitcase under her bed and threw it open. She ran for her drawers grabbing anything and everything that was important to her.

She grabbed snacks from her kitchen and shoved them into her purse. She past the entryway and stopped dead in her tracks. Her head slowly turned to the shadow standing at her door. Their eyes were a bright red and their claws were long and sharp, glinting in the moonlight from the window.

"Hello Ms. Vivian," the shadow spoke.

"What do you want?" Vivian still hadn't moved from her frozen state. She worried any slight movement would trigger the shadow to attack.

"I have a proposition for you." The shadow cast a sphere of light into the center of the room. It was just enough to light both their faces without giving away that anyone was home. "My name—"

"Snake Demon. You're the Snake Demon."

I held out my hands to the side and gave a slight bow of my head. I had come in my Demon form, hoping to show her that I was just like her.

"You don't seem too happy to see me." I looked the woman up and down. She had a short stature, pale skin, and curly dark hair. I had seen her Demon form earlier with long, lamb ears and hooves. Her small horns jutted out the top of her head, practically camouflaged with her dark hair.

"I've heard plenty of you," she growled, showing off a set of sharp fangs, "and all the children you've been stealing."

"Stealing?" I walked closer to my sphere of light so I could see her face easier. She looked between me and her suitcase. "Go ahead. You'll need it regardless of how our conversation goes."

"What do you want?" she demanded, refusing to move.

"I want to offer you something. A job. And a Safe Haven."

"I'm not making any deals. I learned my lesson." She finally moved from the kitchen to her bed. She finished stuffing everything in the suitcase and used her weight to clip it closed. "And I'm not going anywhere with a kidnapper."

"What do you think I do with those children?" I asked, my tone genuine. This was the first I had heard of my reputation being painted in a bad light.

"I don't know and I really don't want to." Vivian closed the suitcase and hoisted it up on its side. "If you don't mind, I have somewhere to be."

"Someone to avoid." I nodded in agreement. "Right now they're being occupied. Until we're done talking, that is."

"You still haven't told me why."

"Well first, I'd like to set my name straight. The children I took from the rings are safe and sound in my Sanc--Safe Haven. All twenty-eight of them have two meals a day, free roam, a soft bed, and great protection."

"I really don't-"

"And I want you..." I stepped close so we were an arm's length away. Her Demon side had come out fully and I could see the dangerous shift in her eyes of an animal ready to fight. "I want you to help me take care of them."

"Why?"

I let out a short sigh. Always with the why. "Because I have other matters to take care of and I can't keep track of twenty-eight rowdy children every waking hour. I need help."

Her demeanor calmed. Her shoulders relaxed but she was still tense all over, ready to explode if danger poked her with a stick. "Out of everyone, why me? How did you even find me?"

"You're a teacher, aren't you?" I shifted into my Human form so we only had a few inches of height difference. "I need someone who knows how to live in both worlds, someone who knows how Humans and Demons work. Someone to guide children of both species. Is that something you could do?"

The sphere turned a shade of blue and I pretended it was a signal that something was outside. Alastor's presence left my mind for a brief moment. When it returned I heard yelling in the distance.

"How did you know about me, though? Have you been watching me?" she questioned.

"In a way, I suppose." I turned back to face her. "I've been looking for a teacher for some time and you were one of the top choices."

"What exactly is this Safe Haven?"

I heard the yelling growing louder. She obviously couldn't hear them yet. "It's a place for Demons and Humans to find safety and shelter. Ever since the Demons broadcasted about themselves, things haven't been the smoothest for both species."

"Why did you take the children though?" Her ear twitched and I forced myself not to smile. Now she could hear them.

"Starting with new, young minds is the best way to ensure both species can live peacefully side by side. There are adults there but getting past their hatred can be...challenging."

Now her head turned to the noise. She grabbed the handle of her suitcase. "Maybe you can reach me another time. I need time to think."

"You either leave tonight and I won't bother you again, or you come with me and make a difference for these children's lives. I can't give them what you can." I snuffed the light and went to the window, peeking out through the shade. Alastor's illusion of Vivian was running down the street with three people behind her. "I'm trying to keep these children from a life like this. A life of constant running and fear."

Vivian was torn. She needed more time to think. She knew of the Snake Demon's history of illegal ring fights. Vivian, herself, had lost some students to those horrible things. Through this Safe Haven she could keep children from falling into those murderous hands and actually give them a life. She could be the foundation of something good in this period of change. She could be safe to be her true Demon self. No hiding or secrets.

"What's your decision?" I asked. The illusion ran into the building and whisked out of sight. The group chased after it, slamming their bodies into the building door.

"Is this Safe Haven even real?"

"I wouldn't be asking you for help if it wasn't. Though I suppose you'll have to trust me until I bring you there." The building door flew open. They stormed up the stairs, an invisible force causing them to trip and fall on each other. They yelled her name. "What is your decision?"

"Okay. Okay! I'll do it. I'll help."

"Beautiful," I smiled. Alastor manifested from the shadows and the woman's eyes widened. I let him put an arm around my back as I held out a hand to Vivian.

"What? What is this?" She backed away, eyes jumping between us.

"A generous protector of the Safe Haven," I answered. "You said yes."

"But...I...I'm...you didn't say anything about the Radio Demon!"

"He's necessary for the Haven to function. Now let's go." The group ran up the remainder of the stairs and tried opening her door. They started kicking near the door handle to burst it open. "Or we can leave you here to handle them."

With nowhere left to go, Vivian grabbed her suitcase and ran across the room. Our hands wrapped tightly together a second before Alastor teleported us back. She closed her eyes and held on tight to my arm, refusing to open them until we arrived.

One eye opened at a time. She looked around at the basic huts and construction. The adults didn't pay her much mind but Charlie was instantly at her side with her big eyes and wide smile. I let her explain everything to Vivian and watched the woman's reactions.

We settled on introducing her to the children tomorrow since most of them were already well asleep or settled in their huts for the night. Charlie showed her to her own bed while Alastor and I walked up to the house.

"That was awfully close," Alastor half growled. His cane tapped the grass while he held his other arm behind his back.

"Like you couldn't have handled them."

"You should've pressed her more."

"I did it just right. If you're so upset about the way I did it, teach me how to teleport during our next session." I turned around and held my arms out wide as I sidestepped the porch stairs.

He rolled his eyes and followed me into the house. "I have something else in mind."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Author’s Note:

Act Two time baby! Vivian is our first OC and I was super excited to write her. I can’t wait to use all these other amazing OCs! Y’all are so creative and talented 😍

If you have ideas on how Alastor might act or want to see anything in particular, you can request, message, or comment it. I love taking ideas and running with them. For now, our boi needs to develop a sense of respect for us, eh?

[recycledraccoon]

I think my thoughts on the penultimate episode can be summoned up as disappointment over a potential we didn't get to see, and why that's ok. (This got long, 1.4k oops lol)

Am I a fan of The Rat Grinders? ABSOLUTELY. I think I started liking them even more when they were full-on confirmed villains. As fan's of the edited show, watching with a week between each episode to theorize and think, I loved seeing and theorizing over these 6 fucked up kids. We know Kipperlily prior to the second half of sophomore year, while she obviously still had her anger and jealousy over TBK's it wasn't ENTIRELY unjustified and completely out of control (although some aspects were utterly and absolutely unfounded and ridiculous). Jawbones file mentions her language being "I think Aguefort likes them more", "The school takes it easy on them", and "Half of them don't even go to classes." All of these are true things people in this world would notice. It's not until AFTER their Mountain of Chaos chaperoned trip, at the end of the year, that KLCK switches to "I hate them." The Bad Kids further briefly discuss if Jace would have asked Jawbone/looked for "students with rage disorders." I think specifically mention it being a disorder is important. Acknowledging its there, KLCK WAS trying to get help for an issue she had. They didn't talk to Jawbone about it, but did decide Jace must have given he went on that quest with TRG's. They further briefly talk about students getting randomly mad, and yes they specifically joked about Fabian shitting in class, but WE also remember the Soil club student getting so mad after having gotten that tainted soil. With the 30 Riz rolled, Jawbone's file ALSO specifically talks about Kipperlily loving her adventuring party. We know things weren't perfect, its obvious from when talking about their name change, but its still there and canon. Kipperlily loved her adventuring party. This is all just Kipperlily, mostly with our information from the first part of ep.16. It is not touching on the rest of the members, especially Ruben and his dreamscape we saw, or of his distinct 180 musical tastes POST Sophomore Year Spring Break. The implications of something happening to them during that time is pretty evident and acknowledged. So we're fans, watching a show, spending so much time thinking about not only our infamous protagonists, but also our villains. Many of us adults, getting older, thinking on the tragedy befalling kids and feeling empathy. So yeah. It's a disappointment over an unseen potential. Specifically tho? Its the potential we could have gotten on The Rat Grinder's thoughts and motivations that could have been revealed through dialogue. Dialogue that we got very little of in what could be considered a significant exchange of dialogue and not bits. I always have high narrative expectations from this show, due to its long standing history of SETTING those standards each and every season. This one episode just fell short emotionally while watching, comparatively.

AND THAT'S OK AND ABSOLUTELY NOT THE BAD KIDS/INTREPID HEROES FAULT

On the narrative side of things, The Bad Kids have had an incredibly stressful past 3 years. From day one, they have been involved in life or death stakes situations. It's always been do or die, and they've died, sometimes more than once. They've lost people and faced traumas that go often unaddressed. TBK's ENTIRE highschool experiences have been a revolving door of violence and unhinged situations. They've also always kinda been assholes, insular and more than a little mean especially to those pegged as enemies. We know them, know they have good hearts and intentions, and love and side with them constantly throughout because The Bad Kid's are our heroes. They are still teenage assholes sometimes, but that is something we love and forgive them for. The thing about this recent battle is that they are very used to the situation they are in by now. TBK's have to prioritize, move fast and hard, and get a job done so countless people don't die while something evil rises in their world. Emotions have been high for them all season, rage especially which is absolutely unsurprising on multiple fronts, and it's absolutely showing in what few dialogue exchanges we have. The Bad Kid's entered that gym for the singular purpose of stopping the situation, saving lives, and making sure something evil didn't arise to power in their fucked up world. Nothing new. They hid, already knowing where the final confrontation was going to be FORCED to happen in due to the nature of the ritual, and prepped. On point and smart of them. Then they entered the battlefield, very quickly getting to business. They know their skills, their friends and how to work together as a devastatingly effective team making heavy hits and masterfully controlling a battlefield despite the chaos. This is what The Bad Kid's Do. They got Ivy and Oisin out of combat as fast as possible, Oisin didn't even get a turn. They took out a high-damage long range attacker and the enemy wizard. They know how powerful and important Adaine is on the field, and they knew Oisin would have been the same. They crippled the enemy with the slow spell, effectively taking Mary Ann out of the running until it gets dispelled later on. Fig saw Ruben's high damage level 9 spell and dropped her ploy to get him out of combat as soon as she could. It was too dangerous to have him up, and while the hell bit was uncomfortable in the moment, it is absolutely on brand. This is what they have to do, if they want to stop Porter, who is our real main big-bad. Remove as many obstacles from the battle so more of them can focus on the fight that really matters.

This combat wasn't ever gonna go any other way, unless the dice gods decided otherwise.

This is what The Bad Kid's Do. In regards to the IH's, it is VERY important to acknowledge that while I've mentioned having high narrative expectations, this is still primarily an improve comedy show around a group of real people's DnD game. It's also a show they have a tight filming schedule for, with back to back days and long hours which we KNOW from the talk-backs leave them very tired. Like any tv show they also have a limit on how many episodes per season they can even produce. I think it was a real and genuine benefit to Sophomore year that they were doing it live, because it gave more time between sessions for the IH's to mull over information and whats been happening in-game. This is also a very well developed campaign world they haven't played in several years, which I certainly know would effect me in how I played. We still have one more episode, the Finale, and so much always happens there. I have incredible faith in Brennan as a DM and storyteller, for all that his players have a huge say in how any story he tells unfolds. There is a VERY real chance that what happens in the finale completely changes my mind on episode 19, and I will go back to rewatch with absolute glee because I know of the coming emotional catharsis in relation to The Rat Grinders. There is also a very real chance we don't get that in the way we want it, but that will be ok too. I will still love this season, rewatch it and laugh and have fun. The best part of having a fandom, is watching us take canon apart to fuel endless au's, fix-it's, character studies, ect. Taking crumbs and going wild with it is par the course, especially when something in a show has left us wanting in the moment of watching it. I think more than anything, I would be and am more upset from infighting and genuine anger directed to each other and especially towards our Intrepid Heroes. It is not wrong to be upset with an episode of a show, but it is to take those feelings out on others, be in in defense from Rat Grinder's fans or justification from Rat Grinder haters. So yes! I was disappointed with this particular episode emotionally. I still think it was funny, I think the combat was brilliant and fun to watch. I still love this show and this cast, and could never dream of being mad at them for how they played a game, and for the fun they were finding within the act of playing it as the well-known unhinged improv comedians we know and love.

I'm excited for next week, buuut I am absolutely consuming fan-content to help deal with my emotions, both the highs and lows.

[hfjonewiki]

Hi! I hope this isn't a strange thing to ask but could you tell me more about ii-critical? I'm writing a research paper on the ii community and I wanna gain more insight to what that part of the fandom was all about.

My main questions are: Why did it exist? Why were you apart of it? What were the posts like? What was the biggest drama? Hell, what platform was it even on??

I wasn't that deep in the OSC when it was up and running (only really got into the community in ~2018) so a lot of community context from that era is lost on me. If you have any other object show oldhead insight for ii you wanna share, please do! I find fandom fascinating and would love to here more stories.

hoooo boy...... cracks knuckles. i went over it a little bit in a previous post but i'll try and give more info this time

(also this should go without saying but please don't try and seek out anyone mentioned or involved its been like 6-7 years since all this happened. also most of us were mentally unstable teenagers hence the. everything)

ii-critical originated as a tumblr blog created by someone named mira (i have no idea if they still go by mira or what their pronouns are now. i'm just gonna stick to they/them for convenience) as a way for them to discuss their criticisms towards the show's writing. the blog was created in mid-to-late 2017, during a time period where "(media) critical" was becoming a common tag. the trend was started by "su critical", a tag created by steven universe fans to discuss the show's faults in response to the show being in a rut of making some VERY dubious decisions (i believe it was started around bismuth's introduction, which was heavily criticized at the time for MANY reasons). the "critical" tags were often created for fandoms who tended to be hostile towards criticism of the media they were based around. the inanimate insanity fandom didn't really have that issue, thankfully. and so, the blog "ii-critical" was born.

at the beginning, the posts were about mira going through an episode beat by beat, and pointing out things they both liked and disliked about it. occasionally, there were posts analyzing a specific character. i'm kind of speeding through the "what were the posts like" section because that is by far the LEAST interesting part of the ii-critical mythos

i found the blog very shortly after its creation. it caught me at a good time, because i was at a point where i was becoming disillusioned with the show (episode 11 was the most recent episode at this point, and i really disliked it due to it being at the peak of ii's melodrama era. the show just felt miserable to watch. s2e11 sucking butt is still an opinion i stand by today Lolzor). mira and i started talking and i was brought on as the blog's other moderator, and i wrote my own analysis posts.

the blog was decently successful and didn't actually get that much hate. most people agreed with our criticisms and were, like, normal about the concept of a thing they liked being flawed. at some point we had a decent amount of followers and made the ill-fated decision to create a discord server for the blog. for added context: at the time of the server's creation, mira was 13, and i was 14. we were NOT old enough to be running a public discord server that at least 50+ people ended up joining.

the server had a lot of problems, mainly in regards to the channels. since we were both at the age where you are hormonal and stupid, we decided to make the nsfw channel accessible to everyone, and didn't even ask for people to include their ages in their intros. a concerning amount of people assumed that mira and i were both adults, or at least older teens until we said otherwise. we also had a blacklist and vent channel, which, word of advice, you should NOT have in a public server. shit gets out of hand SO fast. i vividly remember there being at least one guy who posted in the vent channel on a near-daily basis about pretty serious stuff. trust me when i say that people shared some HORRIFIC information in there. also, we had an emoji that was just a drawing of donut from bfdi with his whole cock and balls hanging out because we thought it was funny. i'm pretty sure there wasn't a "please don't post the donut balls emoji in non-nsfw channels" rule anywhere either.

i could go into more detail about various happenings, but that delves too deeply into interpersonal drama that frankly has no business being shared publicly. one of the most concerning things that happened, however, was this one guy who would come in vc, barely say anything, and fuck around with his gun the whole time. and yes, you could hear it. eventually we got reports of him being predatory towards a younger member of the server, and he was banned. i think that was the first thing that made mira and i go, "oh, we might've fucked up". there was also another incident where somebody was leaking information from inside the server (yet another reason why the vent channel was a HORRIBLE idea), and we banned a bunch of inactive people until eventually realizing somebody had stolen the username and pfp of a real user and impersonated them to stay in the server. this whole ordeal lasted like, two weeks. and again!! we were just BARELY no longer preteens at this point!! and we still thought, yeah, we can handle this. we're super capable. at one point we hired two other moderators (one of whom was 14-15, and the other was an actual adult for once. having an adult moderator led to us FINALLY locking the nsfw channel off to minors, since we had somebody who could moderate it for us), but this was towards the end so most of the damage had already been done

i was removed as a moderator on the blog after a large amount of interpersonal nonsense that, again, i'm not going to get into. it was mainly just because i was spending too much time in the server instead of posting on the blog like i was supposed to. a couple weeks later, i was suddenly banned from the server and mira had blocked me on everything. again, interpersonal nonsense and both of us being mentally unstable, not anyone's business. we reconciled a few months after and both apologized for being dumbasses, so we at least ended things on better terms.

another notable thing is that sometimes, crew members would pop in and out of the server, and they were surprisingly chill about the blog's existence. it was mainly justin and sam from what i remember, and resulted in this legendary image:

i don't remember this bit, but at some point taylor may have responded to one of our posts and was Not Nice about it? again, i don't remember this, take it with a grain of salt. but knowing his history with getting into shit with fans for no reason and how it got to the point where it was cited as a reason he was removed from the team, yeah that tracks

talking about ii-critical is strange, because i don't know where to draw the line between "infamous blog from the early days of the tumblr osc", "stupid pointless infighting between teenagers", and "genuinely horrible decisions and moderation that caused real damage". i'm trying to stick to just the first one and giving info about the last one when necessary. i'm aware a lot of this is gonna paint my past self in a VERY unflattering light, but that's who i was and what i did when i was 14 and i just have to accept that.

ii-critical was just a facet of the tumblr osc circa 2017. a lot of what happened can be traced back to larger issues with the fandom, especially when it came to restrictions on nsfw content. remember, this is pre-tumblr porn ban. i knew an ALARMING amount of people who had nsfw blogs, and even posted nsfw art while they were minors. i don't wanna seem like i'm making excuses for fucking up when it came to moderation and keeping our members safe, but it's important to know that the blog and server were very much a product of a specific point in tumblr history. we saw minors casually posting nsfw on a regular basis and thought, "yeah, it should be fine to have the nsfw channel open to everyone, right?" and like i said, we didn't originally require ages upon introduction. people didn't realize how badly we'd fucked up until the damage had already been done.

i could go on about the dozens of other ways i fucked up, but that would start to dive into the interpersonal side of things. i think i covered everything that actually mattered. i don't plan on talking about ii-critical to this extent again any time soon. everyone who both ran and was part of the blog and server have moved on, i don't wanna keep dragging people back to what's probably a very unpleasant period of their lives.

that said, if prompted, i will talk about the 2012-2014 deviantart era + "dark ages" of the osc AT LENGTH if prompted. i swear i have wisdom beyond the shitty blog i ran with my friends as a teenager. you dont even know about the Ball OC Discourse

[friesian]

my father is dead and i couldn't be happier.

the following is a sort of. reconciliation/vent post since i just got the news a few hours ago that my father died, and i finally feel like i can sort of talk about everything that happened to me as a child. for the first time. without the threat of potential violence. so. tw for neglect, abuse, parental death and honestly just. a lot. if you don't like the most stereotypical 'bad dad' shit, don't read this post.

my father was a cruel man. it was only until recently i was informed that my father used to actually shake me as a baby, no more than a few days old. when i was a few months old, he used to do the same to watch my 'funny reactions' and had to be actively reprimanded by aunt and mother in order to get him to stop lest i die a very sudden death.

when i was a little kid, my father i guess got this idea in his head that i was a little innocent flower and that if anything touched me, that'd be it. i'd be sullied. i'd be dirtied. somehow 'impure'. mind you, my father wasn't a religious man. really, honestly, the opposite. i wasn't allowed to talk about religion or god, explore spirituality, really have 'faith'. this would earn me hostile looks, a loud scolding, or called stupid. this also might displace onto my mom, who received it much worse than me.

when i was 7, my father made the move to go somewhere out into the deep west virginia mountains where i would never be in danger. except by him. we moved to a place where the closest store was 45 minutes by car, getting home from school was 35 minutes-- not counting school bus routes, that was up to 2-3 hours-- and there was not a single neighbor that could see the house nor talk to us. we were alone. for good. for over 11 years of my life i was alone in a house with a man who grew actively more and more hostile to being in that house. as i aged, tried to be a teenager, explore my gender, sexuality, ect. it was all shut down. my computer-- my only lifeline-- was bugged with spyware that allowed him to look at my screen and take control of anything i was doing. a vivid memory of mine is when i used to write fanfiction of innocent teenager things. kissing, holding hands, professions of love, the usual-- nothing explicit. at some point i was caught and had my computer thrown and i was screamed it. i could only run to my room and cry, and hope i wasn't chased. this left me with no sense of privacy, as any computer or technology i ever got passed through him, and as he was a engineer for networking, most things were bugged by him first as much as i tried to remove them. my mom suffered similarly to i, both of us being called slurs and having things thrown at us for existing in his radius. we walked on eggshells. we had no room to breathe. if we weren't in his general space, we were yelled at for avoiding him. if we were actually there, we were yelled at for laughing or even breathing too loud. there was no right answer. my friends never wanted to visit because of him, or he would often get mad at their parents for being 'flakes' or 'untimely', leading for me to be berated about my choice of friend. i wasn't allowed to go out unless it was with 'other girls', and i didn't have many friends to begin with due to the many social problems i faced due to his neglect. i grew up in that house, with many other issues i can't even begin to list, but i grew up and left as soon as i could, and didn't really do much. mostly just coasted by after dropping out of college that he pressured me to be in, lest i end up homeless. my mom divorced him shortly after i left due to being threatened with a gun, and at that point i was pretty sure he was officially off the deep end. this is sort of my 'getting it off my chest' moment as i was never able to speak out about what i faced in any regard due to him consistently monitoring my online presence. for all i know, he could've known about this blog-- choosing to hold onto it for some sort of legal proceeding as he had done to my mother. he tracked her car, recorded her calls, did everything he could to fuck her over. his father did something similar to him back in the 90s, and i needed to avoid it at all costs.

he never got the chance now. i never felt like i had a father, more like an angry dragon that guarded a tower with someone who didn't wanna be there. some sort of 'king' that transformed into a dragon, i suppose. but, i remember relating a lot to the imagery of people trapped in towers by beasts. i wanted to make a comic about it at one point. 11 years of solidarity does a lot to a motherfucker.

to this hour, i haven't shed a tear. i cheered and celebrated, put on my mask as i'm talking to the funeral home people, family, his friends, whatever it is. i've just been blaise and calm. i have to go back to my 'tower' this weekend and see it for the first time in years, now with the memory of my father dead seeped in those walls.

it's been a relief i didn't know i needed, but that house haunts me with the horrors that went on in it. i guess this is sort of my testimony to his life. i refuse to have a funeral. i refuse to have a memorial. he's being cremated and disposed of as soon as i can. i can already tell what little remains of his side of the family has an issue with it, but i don't care. they didn't live the life me and my mom had, and they never will now. for what it's worth, somehow, even though i was forged in fires that i don't think any man should go through-- it made me a more hardened and aware person. you get time to think when you're alone for 11 years. a lot of time to see emotions, patterns, understand, and just pick things apart. he never knew me, elf, he knew my dead name. and i'm thankful for that. i came out a good man all things considered, i have my flaws and issues, but who doesn't. but at least i never was like him. here's to getting out of the tower.

[snowdropluck204]

How You Two Sleep - BNHA (pt 2)

PART 2

Keigo Takami

As the number two hero, he would probably have very little free time and would probably cherish his time with you, his wings would make cuddling positions pretty limited, but you can bet that wouldn't get in his way!

~ Takami stumbled into the apartment, trying desperately to be quiet to avoid waking you, his day had been long, he wanted nothing more than to go home and be in your arms, but The Commission decided he would be best on night patrol as well. ~ So here he was, struggling to stay awake as he finally gets home at three in the morning. ~ As he made his way to your shared room, he was stripping out of his heavy hero costume, thinking he would take care of the clothes strewn through the apartment when he wakes up. ~ Getting into your room, he sees you, sleeping peacefully, hoping he had avoided waking you. ~ Gently laying himself down on his side, he wrapped his strong arms around your waist, pulling you against him, your back to his chest. He curls his wings around the both of you, leaving a sweet kiss on your shoulder as he settles against your body, quickly losing consciousness.

Aizawa Shouta

We know this man loves sleep, probably because he doesn't get much of it. He's up most nights on patrol and then has to teach in the morning and then will come home and grade papers until late. Any chance he has to sleep, he'll take it and bring you with him!

~ Finally, summer vacation, Shouta wouldn't have to deal with children for another two months. Hallelujah. ~ He would still have patrol but he got the week off like he did at the end of every school year. He would spend this week the same way he'd spent it last year. Sleeping. ~ The only difference from last year, to this one, was that now you were in the picture. You were the newest member of staff, helping Recovery Girl in the infirmary. ~ Walking into your shared apartment, you had moved in recently, so there were still boxes everywhere that you were currently unpacking. ~ "Shouta! Welcome home!" You cheered, Shouta swore he felt his heart melt, he smiled, said hello and the two of you sat down with the cats for dinner. ~ As soon as that was over, Shouta gently took you by the wrist and pulled you towards the bedroom, tucking you in before getting comfortable himself. ~ His preferred position for sleep was on your chest, it was just so comfortable there! ~ So with his head on your chest, his arms around your waist and your legs tangled, he fell into restful sleep.

Toyomitsu Taishiro

I can picture Fatgum losing a lot of energy after he comes home from patrol, either a quiet one or a fight, he would want nothing more than to get comfy with you, in any way!

~ Taishiro came home exhausted, most of the heroes did, but he was still so pumped to see you! ~ He'd brought home a bunch of different take outs and snacks (cause the baby can eat a lot!) and he settled down with you on the couch, the two of you barely talking, preferring to be quiet when you both come home. ~ After eating and talking softly about your days, you had both settled down into bed. ~ Taishiro would prefer your head on his chest, even when he isn't using his quirk, he's still pretty tall and broad, and he likes the idea of being able to protect you even in your sleep. ~ I feel like Taishiro would wake up in the middle of the night often, either from nightmares from his job, worrying about his kids (Tamaki and Kirishima, yay Dadgum) or because he was hungry. ~ You didn't mind him waking up in the night for food, as long as he didn't eat in bed, whilst there wasn't any food left, crumbs attract ants! There had been issues…

Usagiyama Rumi

Rumi loves to be cuddled, as much as she wants to prove that she's strong, and she is, she loves being taken care of! So I can imagine her being similar when it comes to home life and sleeping!

~ When Rumi comes home to the smell of dinner already on the table, she can't help but swoon, she'd loved it since you moved in! ~ Dinner was lovely, but she wanted to get to the good bit! ~ Cuddles! (What were you guys thinking?) ~ I feel like the majority of your time with Rumi would be cuddling, in every position, but she would prefer being the little spoon, you behind her, cuddling around her waist. ~ But when you're sleeping, it's a bit different, the two of you cuddled up in bed, but even when sleeping, Mirko is still Mirko, filled with energy! ~ She would move around, probably bringing you with her, as she slept, physically lifting you and rotating the positions when she wanted, hope you're a heavy sleeper!

Kayama Nemuri

I honestly feel like Nemuri would be completely the opposite at home, than she would be in public. I feel like it would be very rare for her to be cuddly, even in the comfort of her own home.

~ When Nemuri came home from working long days at the school, or long nights on patrol, she would usually want to be left alone. ~ She loved you with all her being, but sometimes, she did just want to be on her own. ~ So she would eat what had been left over from the lovely dinner you'd cook (or order in) and then have a bubble bath, which she tended to do most days. ~ After a little pampering and treatment to keep herself looking young (though you assured her she looked gorgeous, you told her almost everyday), she would sneak into bed, smiling when she saw you sleeping, soft breath leaving your lips. ~ She would lay beside you, admiring you for a while, before beginning to drift off herself. ~ Getting herself comfortable, she would slide a little closer to you, not completely touching, but close enough. ~ She would leave a kiss on your forehead, seeing you stir ever so slightly, choosing to rest her own head against yours. ~ She fell into a contented sleep. ~ Though she would wake up with you a lot closer, usually cuddling into her chest.

Yamada Hizashi

Okay! Loud Boy! I feel like Hizashi would be SUPER cuddly, like, being on top of you, wouldn't be close enough, but he would damn well try!

~ It hadn't taken Hizashi long to get home, he was far too excited, he would run the whole way if he could, be he knew you wouldn't cuddle him if he was all hot and sweaty, so he casually jogged home. ~ Once he got there, you were sat on the couch, reading a book you had borrowed from Shouta, running over to you, he would be completely ready to glomp you, when you lifted a hand to stop him. ~ He stood, almost like he had been paused on a screen. ~ You finished the page you were on and marked it, placing it down and settling back in the cushions comfortably, giving your excitable love the all clear. ~ Letting out an excited shout (that had you covering your ears), he jumped into your awaiting arms, getting himself just as comfortable. ~ There would probably be small breaks between cuddling, for food and showers, then he'd be back in your arms, soft and sweet. ~ If we're being honest, that's probably where the two of you would drift off most of the time, Hizashi laying on top of you, head in your chest, arms around you and your fingers running through his hair (now not so pointy).

[circulars-singlet]

Question, if it sounds interesting to answer! Have you met/made friends with any other systems besides your partner? If so, were there any differences or similarities that surprised you?

Have a nice day!

-L

Thank you L for the question!

I have met a few systems other than my partner! I'm going to only talk about the people I've met offline though because that's easier for me. Also obviously I'm talking about systems who've told me/Circ that they're a system explicitly. I don't make assumptions.

The first system I met was my partner. They're the one who introduced DID and other dissociative disorders to me. We were friends for almost two years before they told me they were a system.

Circ introduced me to another while we were in college. The three of us had a thing going for awhile but hot damn was there too much trauma in that tiny space. I didn't actually remember they were a system until Circ mentioned it again.

The next was a friend in a pagan circle I used to attend (fuck I miss them). I found out they were a system after talking about my partner being a system. We weren't very close but you bet your ass I had a small crush on them. They were hot as hell.

Circ brought a friend home who was in a pretty shitty (cough cough abusive cough) situation to help for a bit. She doesn't really talk to me about any of her system shit though.

We met an online friend of Circs recently and they are so cute and fun. I'm glad we were able to hang out :)

....also I'm now realizing that out of the 5 systems that I remember meeting, I've had a thing for 3 of them... What does that say about me....

Anyways!

The fun thing about systems is that y'all mask so fucking well that I guarantee you that singlets don't fucking ever think that you have parts like. At all. There was only one person who I was privy to the DID thing BEFORE meeting and befriending them (Circ introduced them as a system friend so yeah).

One of the similarities that everyone has been... traumaed? Like. Sometimes you talk to someone and you know that they've been hurt real bad. I think every system I've met in person has had a lot of self-worth/self-image issues and seeks out external validation (maybe to an unhealthy degree). This is obviously not something unique to systems (hi 👋), but it's definitely something I notice on first-ish impressions. Another similarity is that they've all had the best intentions and were really thoughtful. In my partners case I know that's because they put other people before themselves but I think that's a running thing between the others I've met too.

Of course there's a lot of differences. One big difference that surprised me was how often one of the systems switched. When we hung out for the day, I think they switched at least five times. My partner's parts usually stay out a few days at a time. So when our friend introduced the first part, I remembered their name and was using it. But at one point they looked at me and said "That's not who I am." So then I tried remembering their name. And like an hour later Circ leans over to me and says "They switched again. I think it's a kid." Yeah. I had a hard time keeping up. Our friend also apologized????? For their obvious switches????? Like. My friend my pal my best bud the only reason I knew there was a kid out at one point was because my partner told me and you had the whimsy. I did NOT notice any other switches. It was such a wonderful experience to see how another system functions with switching.

And honestly? The other three systems really didn't share that part of their life with me, as evidenced by me finding out about the system part much later in the friendships. I always let people share as little or as much as they want since it's not my place to pry.

So. The real answer you're looking for is the stats.

I found out they were a system well after introductions: 4/5

Self image/self worth issues: 5/5

Have openly talked about their system and switches: 3/5

Have seen me without a shirt on... : 4/5

I have thought about kissing: 3/5

Puts up with my shit constantly: 2/5

Is super fucking cute oh my god: 5/5

Needs therapy: 5/5

Thanks for reading,

Mush

[tjalexandernyc]

Not sure why so many people are getting nostalgic over Claire's at the moment but if you'd like to hear my personal Claire's ear piercing story here it is.

I'm 40 years old so I grew up in peak '90s mall culture. Claire's was a standard stop on any mall visit along with The Rave, Auntie Anne's, and the sketchy arcade. Despite the ubiquity of Claire's and its cheap ear piercing, I never got my ears pierced until I was... probably 15 or maybe 14. I don't know how I escaped it for so long; most of my girl friends had their ears pierced either as an infant or at least before they were tweens. I suspect it was a combination of me being a little nonbinary baby who didn't want to wear earrings in both ears but couldn't articulate why, so I never asked for them; the fact that my mom was thrifty and never offered; and my grandmother's penchant for clip-on earrings, since she'd also never gotten her ears pierced. I think when she was growing up in the 1920s it was seen as slutty? Anyway IF I was required to wear earrings for a fancy occasion there were plenty of grandma's sitting around the place.

But when I was 14 or 15, I was at the mall with my father. I don't remember why we were at the mall together. We rarely did anything together, and even now are not especially close. I vaguely remember my childhood best friend being there too. We must have been waiting for someone or something (maybe a movie at the attached theater?) and had some time to kill.

I think my dad must have offered to buy us some earrings we were examining at one of the kiosks, because I remember having to explain to him that I didn't have pierced ears. My dad famously misremembered things about me, like thinking I'd had braces when it was my older brother, not me, who needed them. He was shocked. He must have assumed I'd gotten them pierced at some point, but I told him no, it never happened. He offered to pay for the piercing at Claire's right then and there.

I don't know if I can explain how it felt, that offer. I was largely ambivalent about piercings. I knew, as most '90s kids did, that there was a Gay Ear that some guys wore earrings in, but no one seemed to agree which one it was. I have a visceral memory, down to knowing exactly which seat I was in, when a kid in the elementary school lunchroom got a cheap clip on pirate earring stuck on his earlobe and was mercilessly taunted for it being on the Gay Ear. I both wanted piercings so I could figure out which of my ears, if any, were gay. I simultaneously didn't want anyone putting holes in me. I craved visibility and invisibility in equal measure. I wanted to do something with my dad, since we never did things together. I didn't want to spend my own money on ear piercing, which my father spoke of like some inevitable event. I wanted to talk to my best friend about all this alone even though I knew she would not understand.

I ended up getting my ears pierced at Claire's that day. The 18 year old cashier who was manning the piercing gun made one puncture slightly off center compared to the other. I picked out a pair of cubic zirconia studs, which I thought weren't as girly as the others. After the piercings healed I started wearing earrings pretty much every day and amassed a huge collection of them. I did that up until I came out a few years ago.

I don't wear earrings often anymore but when I do it's usually just one dangly transguy-esque piece or a single hoop. I put it in the same ear that the kid in the lunchroom did. I haven't thought about my father in relation to my piercings for a very long time, until recently, when the Claire's memes reminded me. I think there's probably a lot of pop psychology mud to dig through there if someone cared to. I don't.

My father and I talk a couple times a year now, usually brokered by my mom. He has pierced ears, by the way, three in each ear. I don't remember when that happened. I'd like to think it was around the time my parents got divorced. I'd like to think it was circa 1997. I'd like to think it happened the way I know it didn't, in a way that even our combined shit memories couldn't conjure: that we both got gunned at the Claire's at the mall, ears red and puffy, before getting a cinnamon sugar pretzel to split. It didn't happen that way, but god I wish it had.

[midorisudachi]

"We are ridiculously awesome!" - Zevran Arainai (after winning a battle)

Happy December, loves! How are we already at the end of the year? I have felt incredibly scatter-brained this entire year, due to how fast it has been flying by. I feel as if I didn't get anything (that I had planned to do this year) done. Does anybody else feel that way? I had all these ideas in my head to drawn Dragon Age Inquisition characters every other Monday until Dragon Age Day...which was December 4th...and I did not accomplish my goal! Life catches up to you, ya now?

Zevran is absolutely delightful in Dragon Age Origins. He has no shame in what he says...zero filters with his words! Ha ha! He has the best conversations with the characters and I love his bantering. He's my favourite bisexual elf! I had decided to draw him in a heavy armour...I think it was the "Ceremonial Armour".

Some of my favourite Zevran quotes:

"Elves plant these trees to remind themselves of who they once were. And then they pee on it. Charming symbolism, really." - At the vhenadhal tree.)

"How did I get here? What happened to all those luscious wood nymphs?" - After waking up from the Sloth Demon tricking him

"Hmm... Anyone up for a little bit of naked cliffdiving? No?" - At Redcliffe

And the best one:

Zevran: Might I offer you a bit of advice, my good friend Alistair?

Alistair: I like my hair the way it is, thank you.

Zevran: Truly? As you wish... though my advice is regarding something else completely. It has to do with your recent... exertions with your fellow Grey Warden that I overheard.

Alistair: My...? Oh.

Zevran: It did seem as if you just got going when all grew quiet. You are... feeling all right, yes? Perhaps you are tired?

Alistair: We aren't talking about this, are we? Did I hit my head?

Zevran: I have some roots from home that you may chew if you need energy. As for volume, perhaps you ought to try arching your--

Alistair: Whoa! Whoa! Awkward!

Zevran: You Fereldens are so finicky. How will you ever learn how to pleasure each other unless you talk about it?

Alistair: Not listening! La la la la la!

I hope everybody likes this fan art! Notice the date on it? Yes! I drew this a year ago. Why did I not post it on Tumblr before? *Facepalm* Really though...I hope this is well received & enjoyed. This year I have felt like a failure when it comes to art, for it honestly seems like people prefer digital art over traditional art. Is this so? I love traditional art...I don't want it to die out. Even worse is that some people prefer AI "art" (more like ART THEFT!) over real artists. It can be hard to be an artist sometimes. Don't get me wrong. I love digi art, too. But often my heart yearns for more traditional artwork, as it often gets tossed aside. I feel that is one reason why I had not done well with my art on Instagram. From now on, I will only be posting art here on Tumblr. Thank you to ALL of you who have liked and shared my artwork. You mean a lot to me and I appreciate you in supporting me. PLEASE let me know if you draw Dragon Age fan art, too! I'd love to see it.

Drawn with Sakura Pigma Micron pens and then coloured in with a mix of Copics and Ohuhu markers. White accents done with a gel pen. Background was done in Photoshop Elements.

Zevran Arainai & Dragon Age Origins (c) Bioware & Electronic Arts

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for "gossiping" about a coworker?

I (27m) work in a liquor store and am quite genuinely the most competent employee despite having been until very recently the newest. Other than the owner, there are 2 who've worked there longer than me and both of them (I'll call em C (31m) and M(39f) have made much less effort to learn about liquor or even, quite frankly, people skills than I have. And lemme tell you, I started out very socially anxious. I'm a regular socialite now.

So C, at least, has a really good work ethic. He's not super socially adept with customers but he makes up for it by going above and beyond, like taking initiative to do a lot of the relatively "shit" work that the rest of us don't wanna do. I'd also say I get along with him very well bc he's pretty intelligent and open-minded.

M, meanwhile, is genuinely the most simple-minded person I've ever known in my life. The good thing is that she seems to be kind of self-aware of not being very smart and able to be a good sport about it (ngl it helps that I'm gay and she's the type to want a sassy gbf so i can kinda get away with being mean as a joke) - and she is also often just as self-aware about the fact that she doesn't do shit at work. Like she'll literally pause deliveries just bc she doesn't feel like driving, she never takes out trash, she's basically always late, she mentally shuts down at the prospect of any math despite working with money, she has little to no decision-making skills either, she spends half her shift in the bathroom and the other half literally playing solitaire, she isn't able to help customers with shit bc she's never made an effort to learn about anything we sell, etc. But she's nice, and we really don't need her help that much with anything other than just having people behind the counter.

And that's more or less what I told the newest hire, S(25F). It was in the context of explaining exactly how incredibly easy this job is - that basically almost nothing was gonna be expected of her. As examples I told her how M does the least here by far after being here for over 2 years and is at no risk of being fired. I really didn't think much of it bc my intentions were purely to point out that this is a chill job.

But a few weeks later, seemingly at random, M kinda blew up at me for being "disrespectful" about something entirely unrelated. In short it was a matter of me getting a little too comfortable joking about her incompetence in front of a customer, and I hadn't realized in this particular instance it would be upsetting but I understood after the fact and I apologized. She responded literally ONLY by saying "you're not gonna disrespect me, I'm grown" and went on to literally just leave for the day. I was baffled, but when I saw her next I basically immediately gave another apology. She explained then that the reason she was upset was that the new girl S told her that I said she was the laziest one here, saying "I thought we were friends."

I obviously tried to apologize profusely, promising her that it wasn't a "talking shit" sort of thing and trying to explain the context of that, etc. But also I think it's pretty fucking rich and kinda insane of her to be so upset that I said she was lazy. She says so herself, all the time. Also the fact that S would tell M about this conversation and clearly either leave out the context or just do nothing to dissuade M from being upset about it.... Basically idk if I should feel bad about this. In the future I won't be talking shit to S just pragmatically speaking but WAS i wrong to do it at all? AITA?

What are these acronyms?