#(AND THEN EVERYONE FORGOT ABOUT IT AND I'VE BEEN SUFFERING EVER SINCE!!!!!)
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I feel like I am always complaining when talking about One Piece fandom but it's rough out here… For years I've been in my little bubble where we all loved Nami and understood her character. It's been so long since I interacted with anyone having a strong negative opinion of her that I genuinely forgot that some people hate her. I was just trying to find a specific episode when I stumbled upon a fucking Quora discussion about Nami hitting Straw Hats and couldn't believe we are still on it… I get not liking a gag, but taking it that seriously that you genuinely believe she is the worst character is insane. Can't believe that in the big year of 2024 there are people who think that Nami is the most selfish member of the crew and that the reason is a fucking gag. Yes, the joke is shit, but it's so obvious that people don't have a problem with that. Every response to the original question wasn't about stopping the gag, but insisting that man should return the energy and harm her. It reeked of people wanting violence against women it got me sick. And this is not the first time I saw this convo specifically about Nami. When I just got into the show, I saw so many people wanting her dead, beaten, and whatnot. So yeah, stop pretending you have an issue with it, we all know what's going on.
Also, you people know that Nami can't harm Luffy, right? You know that because of his Devil Fruit normal physical attacks don't work on him? Like, that's why it's a gag… It doesn't affect anyone. None of them has ever suffered any consequences of Nami's beating. Every time she beats them, it is never permanent. They never had bruises, any injuries, bleeding, swelling, etc. Why? Because it only happens in a comedy frame and disappears in the next one, when the joke is over. Like I don't even like this trope and I find it annoying but this is just common sense. Just because Sanji's gag got out of control, doesn't mean that same happened to Nami or anyone else. And let's be real, she only beats them when they deserve it. Like you don't see her attacking anyone but two perverts who are harassing her and every other girl whenever they get the chance, and Luffy and Zoro (honestly I don't remember the last time she hit him) when their stupidity puts everyone in danger. Another fun fact, every Straw Hat except for Robin has beaten Luffy for comic relief when he was being an idiot. Nami is not alone there.
#one piece#one piece fandom#nami#cat burglar nami#one piece nami#op nami#straw hat pirates#straw hat crew#straw hat nami
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20 questions for fic writers ✍️
Tagged by my dear @spotsandsocks 🩵
How many works do you have on ao3?
249!
What’s your total ao3 word count?
1,588,699 ummm guess i really never can stfu 😅
What fandoms do you write for?
mostly 9-1-1, but also teen wolf. debating another but we shall see..
Top five fics by kudos
if i lay here, would you lie with me (forget the world) (over 3k kudos 🥲)
nobody can do everything
i want to love you (but i don't know how)
five + one (istg i'm gonna come up with a title for this so i don't have to see this embarrassment of one anymore 💀)
if i asked you to stay, would you?
Do you respond to comments?
always! i appreciate people taking the time to leave them <3
What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
—uhh either of these since they're both mcd ooop 🫣
dancing after death (you and i)
come back home (version 2)
What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
—mm i'll go with chris doesn't come back au since it was full of angst and everyone suffered ���
wake me up (i'm drowning)
Do you get hate on fics?
no just annoying/unnecessary comments sometimes 🙃
Do you write smut?
i may have written a few....
the slutty suit (i think this one's self explanatory 😏)
upstairs/downstairs (pwp on a rainy day in the fire station)
i'll let you fire my hose if you merry my christmas (author!buck writes pwp x amatuer model eddie for his book covers)
beautiful drama series (buddie meet on a dating app and start up fwb)
Craziest crossover:
uhh, well there's my step up au: let me lose myself
or there's my divergent au: crossfire
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
not that i know of...
Have you ever had a fic translated?
i don't think so. someone asked once, but not sure what ever happened with that
Have you ever co-written a fic?
yep, with my wife @loserdiaz 🫶🏻 (i think i know what our next one shall be 👀)
—no body, no crime
—this is my idea of fun (playing video games)
—i don't want to keep secrets just to keep you
All time favorite ship?
buddie ofc 😌
What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
—uhhh probably the buddie fwb buck 1.0.2 that i started, deleted, but still have the notes for....rawie look away
What are your writing strengths?
keeping them in character and metaphors, according to my lovely readers 🥰
What are your writing weaknesses?
keeping things short 😭 (idk i could make a whole list but don't feel like tearing myself apart atm lmao)
Thoughts on dialogue in another language?
—to each their own
First fandom you ever wrote in?
teen wolf!
Favorite fic you’ve written?
i hate picking between my children 😭
i'm gonna go with duck buck, just bc i've been thinking about her lately 🐥 (and i'm sure y'all are tired of hearing about my favorite one 😂)
the ducking of evan buckley
—so i definitely forgot this was in my drafts hfurnj. if you’ve already done this just ignore me <3 tagging: @loserdiaz @monsterrae1 @redlightsandicedtea @honestlydarkprincess @bi-buckrights @onward--upward @elvensorceress @daffi-990 @wikiangela @hippolotamus @wildlife4life @eddiebabygirldiaz @confetti-cupcake @queerdiaz @jackluvsdaniel @ronordmann @spaceprincessem @underwaterninja13
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words about tot chapter 9
Gave myself a solid day to stew in my thoughts about ch9 and I just want to say that mihoyo is EVIL for timing it right before the anniversary. I don't know if I can be happy knowing Luke is suffering all alone in every conceivable universe other than his personal story/card timeline.
Point 1: How the chapter explored Luke's feelings of guilt for... Existing I guess?
I've been eagerly awaiting the reveal of Luke's survivor's guilt. The whole [wanting spirits to exist so he can at least apologise, or do SOMETHING, but knowing they don't] is such exquisite angst. I'm very happy they took the effort to write it in (though fortune tellers actually scare me in real life).
And now onto the related Point 2: Luke's feelings of guilt for literally everything else
I was reading through Luke's birthday greetings, and realised how often he calls himself greedy for literally wanting anything. God damn, SHE IS YOUR GIRLFRIEND IT'S NOT GREEDY OF YOU TO WANT TO SPEND TIME WITH HER --
That aside, it comes back to the theme of Luke Pearce's thought process, which in my brain goes a little something like this:
Good thing happens -> I do not deserve this
Bad thing happens -> It is completely my fault and no one else's
Which, might I add, vaguely reminded me of something from a lecture I forgot from my psych undergrad years. I'm worried for you, Luke. Please, Dr Yishmir, refer him to one of your colleagues for mental health.
In his personal 'route', he finally starts to come around with the idea that sometimes bad things... just happen and it's no one's fault (thank you, strategically placed rainbow in iridescent heartbeat). But in the main story? He's been feeling guilty ever since he saw MC after avoiding her for YEARS. There's no Aaron meddling with the two of them, or MC helping him clean his mess of a house to kick-start a card story. This is the man who hid in the attic after sending his confession after a YEAR of dates with MC -- the main story doesn't even give him a chance to start forgiving himself.
Basically, Luke Pearce is a mess in the main story, because everything that makes him un-messy happens by pure chance.
Point 3: Luke's black and white thinking of good and bad
One of the highlights of this chapter for me was Luke's anecdote about him faking a cold so MC would go out with her other friends and forget about him. Now, that's all well and good until he compares himself to the mum with Munchausen's syndrome, who is the closest thing we get to a 'villain' in this chapter. On top of his guilt, this whole I'm either a good or completely bad person mindset is really not doing favours for his mental health.
His anecdote also happens to be an interesting parallel to shape of you, because I remember Luke specifically wished to be forgotten in that card. He wants what's best for MC (because he thinks that he's taking everyone's love from her) but he also wants something for himself. And because he doesn't believe he's able to do both, but also because he isn't able to let go of his 'selfishness' sometimes, he thinks he's an awful person.
And now, to the last to do in my rant agenda.
Point 4: what happens in chapter 12. (Spoilers for CN server, but only about the Luke scene)
1. Ohmygod. He's going to run away. I can't see main story Luke NOT blaming himself for nearly hurting the MC. In whichever timeline, his priority is to keep her safe, and god, if he thinks he's a danger to her, the only way to keep her safe would be by disappearing again.
2. I'm going to read too much into this but MC trying to get Luke to recognise her while she's being pinned to the ground is such delectable angst. He's always worried that she'd forget about him -- whether it was the 8 years or literally just hanging out with other kids at school. But here she is, in a situation where he's essentially forgotten about her. The voice that my brain concocted up for MC was extra desperate in that scene.
Anyway, that's all I had to say about the recent main story developments in ToT. Keep the angst coming, writing staff. What a power move to send this out right before anniversary on BOTH servers. If there's anything I've taken away from this, it's that Luke stans are absolutely unhinged. Twitter circle people, I see you requesting more angst. How can we get even angstier than Luke nearly hurting MC while he's dressed in the outfit that he wears for his proposal card ??
#a long rant#about chapter 9#tears of themis#just text#and i wrote this completely on my phone in one sitting so forgive any spelling/grammar errors#i needed to just . get this out
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Was reading testimonies of people who are active Satanists today. Needless to say that I'm in shock and my eyes were widely opened. Up until now, I thought that Satanism was only about performing human sacrifices and doing similar scary stuff. Although these are probably part of it, I realised that, what these people truly believe is that, Satan and his demons are sweet, friendly and kind to them and give them the love, care, comfort, support, acceptance and warmth they never had. They even say that demons protect and heal humans and want the best for them! Moreover, many demons are not bad and wish to repent!
I've been experiencing rejection, loneliness, abuse and betrayals since forever. Life in a survival mode for 24 out of 30 years of my life. Friends who became enemies, those who didn't eventually died or just forgot about me, and those who are still here won't be here for long just like everyone else. Parents who were dismissing my suffering at school, forced me to hang out with my bullies and found me at the very last minute before I was about to jump from the balcony of our apartment when I was 8 years old, and never did nothing about it. Uncertainty, suicidal thoughts, sense of constant ephemerality have been the norm. And to all these, add the things I ended up believing about God (that I'm chosen to be his punching bag and He will keep suffering going if this glorifies His name and expand the Kingdom, that as soon as I'm thankful and joyful about something or someone He will take it/them away because He is God and this will be good somehow).
It has been some weeks now that I've been hearing a voice saying to me this: "If you leave, you will never be lonely or abused or rejected again. People will love you". And indeed, for 2 months now when my faith has been weaker than ever, I've been more loved than ever in my life. When my faith was strong, the suffering kept going. Therefore, the temptation to surrender has been huge. The more I resist the bigger it becomes. Breakdowns, screeming, battle in the mind, lightning storms in the brain, shortness of breath, panic attacks. I know who Satan is. But I'm spiritually, physically and mentally exhausted....
So, what was shocking is that, if I surrender, I'll basically turn into a Satanist. And once you do that, it's hard to come back.
THIS. IS. UTTERLY. TERRIFYING.
The temptation is still here, present and strong. But I don't want him to devour me....
Please, PLEASE pray for me....
#christianity#mental health#trauma survivor#satanism#spiritual warfare#rejection#abuse#demons#demonic influence#temptation#deliverance#prayer request#prayers needed#urgent
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My Predictions for Who (If Anyone) May be Corrupted Next
I'M BACK ALREADY YOU CAN'T GET RID OF ME FOR LONG!!!!
So yeah, we’ve got Corrupted Forever now. That’s fun
What’s more fun is how this happened, and what this means for other people
Because Forever might have been the one most at risk to corruption due to his extended time in the Nether, but he is far from the only one vulnerable to this
Here’s who I know of to be at risk, in order of most likely to least likely
Fit, Phil (Kinda), Etoiles, Bagi, and Pac
Because like I pointed out earlier today, Fit and Phil cleaned up a huge amount of the concrete left around the server, with QSMP Updates even commenting (specifically in regards to Fit) that “That surely won’t have consequences, right?” Or something along those lines I don’t have the patience to look it up because Twitter is a hot mess in that regard
That, and his Rebellion work, is why I think Fit is currently most at-risk. Because in addition to the Black Concrete Cleanup he and Phil did, he also went to investigate the Black Concrete Dungeon to find traces of one of the Codes. So unfortunately, I think if anyone else is gonna succumb to corruption, it might be Fit. (AND PHIL WILL SUFFER DAMMIT)
After that we have Etoiles, who has been doing various work for the Rebellion that has semi-frequently led him to be exposed to Black Concrete, but to my knowledge, he hasn’t had as much direct contact with it aside from the Code Explosion and the time he, Fit, and Bagi investigated the Code together. Not to mention that he’s already Code-Corrupted kind of, and it’d be a little strange for him to have two separate infections/corruptions
And of course there’s Bagi, who had also investigated that Black Concrete Dungeon, but this is basically the only time Bagi had any extended contact with the Concrete aside from day-to-day stuff that everyone had
Pac of course, was in the Nether for a bit, having been led there by Walter Bob, but it doesn’t look like there’s been any effect on him that we can tell, since he wasn’t there as long as Forever was. I’m just adding him to the list because he was in fact in the Nether at one point (There's also the fact that right now he's probably gonna have his hands full with Mike, if anything comes from that)
Now, I did put Phil on the list, but he’s a bit of a special case here. Because while he DID help clean up the Concrete, leading to him having a lot of direct contact, he wasn’t the one that QSMP Updates called out. Not only that, but we now have Rose possibly helping him, which means he may not get corrupted because of her influence and protection. (It’s not surefire though, so that’s why he’s still on the list, and pretty high on it at that. I think I might have more thoughts on this later though because I’ve got an idea for some good angst potential here specifically)
So yeah, that's who I think could possibly be corrupted. Fit is definitely the highest on the list
(AND APPARENTLY SOMEONE REBLOGGED MY FIRST POST TALKING ABOUT THIS WITH THIS IN THE TAGS SO HEY THAT’S A GOOD OMEN IF EVER I'VE SEEN ONE)
In short, lots to look forward to :)
*Edit because I forgot to mention that FIT IS DOING A SATURDAY STREAM TOO BTW. That ISN'T TOO NORMAL FOR HIM and is raising ZERO RED FLAGS
#IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE CHRISTMAS DAMMIT#THIS ISN'T IN THE HOLIDAY SPIRIT#THIS ISN'T IN ANY HOLIDAY SPIRIT#I mean at least as far as I know#There could be a Holiday this is directly invoking#Who knows??#Either way this is too close to the holidays to be doing lore this heavy#Unless it's leading to some reason for people to get a bit of a break#In which case power to them#But we just won't be in the holiday spirit at that point man#qsmp#qsmp theory#q!forever#q!phil#q!philza#q!fit#q!fitmc#q!etoiles#q!bagi#q!pac#q!pactw
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[clears throat] anyone order clownscar fic propaganda? no? too bad. clownscar fic propaganda.
"so. i've been thinking."
"never a good sign," loony says without looking up from the redstone he's working on -- he doesn't need to look up to know it's clownpierce again, because not only does he recognize the man's voice but he also only ever ends up with one man invading his hardcore world. "what trouble are you getting yourself into this time?"
"i've been thinkin' about branzy," clown starts, and loony lets out a long-suffering sigh. "dude," he says, "you just need to call him, not-"
"-and i've decided i need to get him to call me by making him jealous. it's been too long since i've put myself out there, you know? i should be showing that i'm not only available but also a catch, so he realizes how much he misses me."
"you're a menace," loony says in a complete deadpan. "and also insane -- are you hearing yourself talk right now? call him."
"so what i'm thinking is," clown says, breezing right past loony's very good advice, "the ideal rebound has gotta be some guy from one of those toxic codependency deathgame duos, right? everyone loves them, they always have great thematic significance or whatever the hell, and they'll be good enough at pvp to hold their own but bad enough that i could take them in a fight, easy. that? that's some trophy boyfriend material right there."
"i'm not hooking you up with legs, dude."
"who?" clown looks genuinely confused for a second, and then shakes his head and moves on. "no, man, i already have a date lined up. he seems like a great guy. he's a builder, he even likes running scams, he's famous for the deathgame thing."
loony sighs again, though it's more at his malfunctioning redstone than out of actually caring what clown is saying. "what poor man are you dragging into your nonsense rebound scheme this time?"
"his name is goodtimeswithscar," clownpierce says proudly. "he's a terraformer."
...loony blinks. "come again?"
"you heard me. i have a date lined up with scar, like from that whole desert duet thing everyone was going wild about a couple years ago?"
it actually takes loony several seconds to realize the reason his chest hurts is because he's laughing so hard he can't breathe. "you? you're going on a date with scar? you are boned, clown! there is not a snowball's chance in the nether that is ever going to work out!"
clown crosses his arms. "listen, you don't have to get salty with me just because i pulled a hermit."
"oh, yeah, i'm salty, sure." loony tries and fails to wipe the tears from his eyes. "dude, i'm just saying, i'm pretty sure only one of you eats people, and in my experience that's usually a dealbreaker?"
"being a killer clown doesn't make me a cannibal, loony," clown huffs.
thunder rumbles in the distance, and loony perks up his head at the sound of rain. "oh, wow, would you look at that, it's storming! guess i'd better go collect some more mob heads before it passes." he sweeps the rest of his redstone supplies into a shulker hastily, swapping into his elytra and grabbing a few rockets. "good luck on your date or whatever!"
"loony, i do not eat people-" clown starts.
"-yeah definitely what i was talking about good luck on your date bye!" loony yells from the skies, having already taken off for his guardian farm.
.......................
two weeks later, clownpierce is back in the redstone lab, looking very huffy and somewhat like a wild animal has gotten to his clothes.
loony grins at him. "how'd it go?"
clown crosses his arms. "you forgot to warn me about the convex on purpose."
loony snorts. "i did say only one of you eats people. it's not my fault you're self-centered enough to think i was talking about you."
"yeah, yeah, you worded that misleadingly on purpose and we both know it. and you call me a menace."
"i do, because you keep breaking into my hardcore world with insane rebound ideas instead of just calling branzy. speaking of which, now are you going to give up on your weird schemes and just text him?"
clown grins, arms still crossed. "nah. we're going on a second date tonight."
"you are a lost cause, dude."
yeah. anyway vote clownscar.
CLOWNSCAR FIC PROPAGANDA!!!!!
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Untangling Family History
After vaguely mentioning that my host's grandmother had DID, I thought I should go into this a bit more. It was a "discovery," that I've been meaning to discuss for a while.
I say "discovery" because my host heard this a long time before I existed, filed it away as not important, and forgot all about it came up in a conversation with his mother.
Before I came along, my host "knew" a lot about DID from movies and hearsay. And all of it was wrong. Never base your knowledge of a subject on media.
Among these wrong beliefs, it was assumed every alter had complete amnesia from the others, they all would publicly go by different names to make them easy to identify, and switches would be super obvious to outside observers.
Again, none of that is true.
But it did mean that when my host's mom told him in the past that his grandma had multiple personalities (because that's what everyone in the house knew the disorder as until well after my host was an adult,) 20+ years prior, he was skeptical since it didn't meet his bad understanding of the disorder. By that point, his grandma also had suffered a severe stroke that left her where she couldn't speak in complete sentences. So everything he learned had to be filtered through his mom's recollection.
Now, we realize that DID is very often covert and that headmates will often mask as other headmates. Just because people thought her alters went away doesn't actually mean they did. And she had a history of mood swings and memory issues that DID could account for long after the point when it was supposedly gone.
What's more, according to stories from his mom, his grandmother was institutionalized as a teen. There, she was subjected to various "treatments" including electroshock therapy. (This must have been at some point in the 60s.) And naturally, her family claimed she was faking and was lying about abuse taking place in the house. Given what we know about that side of the family, the abuse is one thing none of us ever doubted.
After going through all of this, there would be a strong incentive for her to lie and pretend to be cured even if she wasn't
We still don't know for certain if she had DID or not. She's not around to answer questions about it.
But if it's true, it would certainly be interesting how we'd end up with three generations of plural-experiences in the family.
#plural#plurality#multiplicity#sysblr#systems#actually plural#endogenic#system#pro endo#plural system#pro endogenic#system stuff#actually a system
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The 'Worshipped Wives' Committee (Part 4)
The Heartbroken Feathered Serpent
Link to Part 3
Shuri was the last to enter the gilded room before sitting down next to a pregnant Okoye and indifferent Namora.
Ayo arched a brow at the queen.
Ayo: You look stressed, my Queen.
Shuri, waving off her formalities: We have a problem.
Namora: What is it?
Shuri: I've upset my husband.
Ayo: So, you have a problem. Not we.
Shuri: Yes.
Okoye: What did you do?
Shuri: I told him I hated him, and he's been avoiding me ever since.
Okoye: Avoiding?
Shuri: He no longer visits my lab. He does not sleep in our room. I rarely see him anywhere in Wakanda.
Ayo: Any affection?
Shuri: None. He doesn't even look at me during our meetings with the council. He seems so cold now.
Namora: That is called a consequence. Not a problem.
Shuri: And that conment is not helping me come up with a solution.
Ayo: Why did you tell K'uk'ulkan that you hate him?
Okoye: Especially when you know he's extra sensitive to your words.
Shuri: He was being annoying and it was pissing me off. Like- he knows I was working hard on something and he got mad at me because I forgot something he had planned out.
Ayo: Shuri. He planned something out and you stood him up. You're the bad guy in this situation.
Shuri: I am not-
Namora: -You know he will never escape the judgment of others pertaining to the wrongs he's done to you and Wakanda. You saw how everyone was against your wedding. *crosses her arms* You should have just ran your spear through him if you did not want the burden of his affection. It would be more honorable than this.
Shuri: I- *sighs under Namora's glare* Ok. How do I fix this?
Ayo: You're going to have to drop the act.
Shuri: The act?
Okoye: Being difficult with him. You're going to have to be affectionate and open and sincere.
Shuri: Affectionate? Like... PDA...?
Okoye: Yes. And actually doting on him. Everyone wants to feel loved and appreciated by their spouse.
Shuri: Can't I just sleep with him?
Namora: Being intimate with your lover is not a remedy. You must resolve things with words. You know that intimacy holds great meaning between lovers in Talokan. Do not offend Aj K'uk'ulkan further by suggesting such a thing.
Shuri: This sucks.
Ayo: Then maybe you shouldn't go around telling him you hate him.
Shuri: I don't want to hear anything from you Ayo. Let's not forget how you made Aneka cry for those ducklings.
Ayo: Not wanting to deal with duck poop is way less serious than telling Aneka I hate her.
Okoye: I agree.
Namora: The two of you are undeserving of your companions' affection for making them cry and suffer so much.
Ayo: I don't want to hear that coming from someone who's married to a woman with a blood kink.
Namora: Oni likes blood in combat. It does not cross over into our relationship. She is treasured properly unlike your lovers.
Ayo: What about that time you landed her in a wheelchair.
Namora: That was because I pleasured her too much. *shrugs* She was spoiled thoroughly during her recovery. I now know her limits very well.
Shuri: I'm still surprised you top Oni.
Namora: There is no top or bottom. We just do whatever feels right in the moment.
Ayo: Wait! You've been on the bottom?
Namora: Have you ever seen Oni tipsy or after a sparring session?
Ayo: Ah. I understand. Drunk Aneka is something else entirely.
Okoye pulled out a comtainer of cubed fruit before getting teary as she looked inside.
Ayo: Udade?
Okoye, holding up a heart-shaped piece of honeydew with her fork: I've been craving melons like crazy lately, so Attuma packed me a container of honeydew today. *sniffles* And he cut every piece into a heart.
Shuri: I-Is that bad?
Okoye: No. It's just so cute. *sniffles*
Namora: But you are crying.
Okoye: If you were pregnant, you would understand. *pops a piece of fruit into her mouth* These hormones are serious.
They all nodded in agreement before refocusing on the Queen's dilemma.
Okoye, pointing her fork at the Shuri: What are you going to do?
Shuri: Short black dress tactics?
Ayo: Mm... no.
Namora: You should wear something from Talokan.
Shuri: Ok. *makes notes* Then I find him and apologize. Maybe call him my king? Bat my eyes a little.
Okoye: It must be sincere.
Shuri: it will be. I just might need a bit of liquor in my system.
Ayo: Shuri.
Shuri: What!?
Okoye: Absolutely not.
Shuri: That's too much to do sober.
Ayo: You married him!
Shuri: And I'm trying to fix our marriage.
Okoye: Bast give us strength.
Namora: You must be clear and sober with your apology. He will know your intentions, and you may face his wrath if you half ass it.
Shuri: Fiiiinnne. I'll try.
Ayo: And. If all goes well- you'll report back to us with good news.
Shuri: If it works.
Namora: It will work if you are sincere.
Shuri: Right. *takes a deep breath before exhaling* Sincere
End notes:
We finally get to see the other side of the wife worship quad. Namora could definitely be a part of the wife worship squad, but she's never as explicit as Oni. So. That's why she's over here.
Should I write out a snippet of Shuri apologizing to Namor? How long do you think it will take for them to make amends?
Link to Part 5
#mickimomo#okoye x attuma#attoye#okoye#namora x oc#namora#onimora#namor x shuri#shuri#shuramor#nashuri#ayo#ayo x aneka#the i worship my wife committee#the worshipped wives committee
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I know I didn't make a follow up post about Disneyland, but long story short, I survived, and it was incredible. I wish instagram still was connected to tumblr, you would've seen all my updates. If you want to see the pictures I posted, here's my instagram (you have to scroll a little because we celebrated both Easter and Lily's fourth birthday since we've been back) but it was amazing and I've since been suffering from the post-Disney blues more like depression 😭 since we've been home.
Galaxy's Edge was the BOMB and I just had to share my freaking ROGUE SQUADRON HELMET that I didn't even know EXISTED, because I wore my HU rogue squadron tank top (with the hoodie that you can't see) of course on Star Wars Land day (our last day) and it was just too perfect to pass up. It is so cool you guys. I AM SO COOL NOW. I CAN BE ROGUE NINE WHENEVER I WANT. I'M BASICALLY CORRAN HORN NOW!!
The blue milk was delicious! I wish I could've tried the green milk because it's supposedly even better, but it has grapefruit in it (damn you psych meds!!) so that was a bummer, but oh well. The x wing was SO COOL, and so was the Millennium Falcon (again, go to my instagram to see it (am I fishing for likes?! maybe 😉)) and while we couldn't ride the Rise of the Resistance because they don't do single riders, I was an engineer on Smuggler's Run and the group I was with was really welcoming and it was pretty fun! Also, my R2D2 ears were SO cute but SO uncomfortable which was a bummer, I had been wanting them for months and ended up preferring the cheap etsy ones I got me and the girls (you can see them in the instagram pics from the first two days!). But we met R2 while I was wearing the R2 ears, so, you know, that was PRETTY FUCKING COOL 😱
Last but not least, we found these amazing ILYIK spirit jerseys and while I typically am not a fan of the spirit jerseys I just couldn't pass these up. We have ILYIK engraved on our wedding bands, they were on my R2 wedding heels, on our cake topper, and on our third anniversary we painted this which has been above our beds ever since (this fall is our eighth anniversary)(look at us, what babies!):
We did rope drop to fireworks every single park day, with one rest/pool day, and fuck it was exhausting and I was in soo much pain and so exhausted, but it was so damn worth it. SO WORTH IT YOU GUYS. I cried when we left the gates the last night, because it had been soo magical and such an incredible time and I had been so happy and... when am I going to be that happy again?! Fuck if I know. Seriously 😭 hence the post-Disney blues/depression...
It was just amazing. Magical. Everything you could've hoped for. The girls had the best time. I was so stressed out and sure, I forgot ninety percent of my personal hygiene stuff because I had to pack everyone else's shit but hey that's motherhood for you.
Okay, this was supposed to be a Star Wars souvenir appreciation post but it's getting away from me a bit... anyway. I survived Disneyland 2024. I wish I could go back. Someone take me back?!
#joelle's life#disneyland#disneyland 2024#chronic pain#chronic fatigue#chronic illness#motherhood#chronically ill#chronically ill mom#crohn's disease#endometriosis#arthritis#star wars#star wars land#galaxy's edge#r2d2#blue milk#her universe#rogue squadron#corran horn#rogue nine#ilyik#x wing#millennium falcon#my hair for the archives#charlotte rose#lillian gabriel#secret tom#me#my face
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Morning call
Day 2 of October Practice
Prompt: Wake up call
Warnings: None (ask to add if needed)
Note: I took an insane amount of creative liberties with this one, since the basic canon hasn't been fully established yet, so obviously the characters' mannerisms, thoughts and story details are probably not what their creator will make of them later
Merged conscious belongs to @uvpartybomb
(sorry for so many delayed days, I'm trying to make up for that!)
Everything felt so nice. Warm and comfortable. Like sleeping in a cozy bubble or in a cloud gently touched by sunlight.
Her nights were usually calm but not sweet like this. They were rest but not affection.
All was peaceful.
…
What was that noise?
Phone.
A phone was ringing.
Her phone was ringing.
Celeste woke up in a hurry, because for someone to call her this early, it needed to be important.
"Hello?" She hoped her grogginess didn't sound too pronounced in her voice.
"Hi auntie."
It was Mason, her husband's nephew. He didn't sound scared or worried, so at least it didn't seem like there was going to be bad news. She hadn't heard from him for a very long time, since his work shifts tended to be tight and he needed lots of rest afterwards.
But it was nice to hear from family from time to time.
"Hello Mase. Is everything.. alright?" There was no shame in making sure that nothing was going badly, even if her suspicions were likely to be true.
"No, no! I'm just about to do a morning shift so I thought to call you already before I forgot. Um… Happy birthday..!" he was still a bit introverted but he did sound enthusiastic, so probably just trying not to speak too loudly and get stared at.
Between the haze of the previous day, she hand't even remembered her own birthday. She had to thank Mason for waking her up early, because she knew from experience many others would call or visit to congratulate her as well.
"Thank you so much, dear. I'm so glad you made up some time just for this."
"Well, me and Sara haven't heard from you in a while, so I thought this would be a good occasion to call."
"This is why you're my favourite nephew, Mase." She was smiling, but she couldn't be sure Mason was able to tell on the other side.
"Uh, I've to go now, but I'll try to maybe send a gift."
"Don't waste your money on an old lady like me, dear!" She half-whispered jokingly
"I'll see what I can do, I promise..! Bye for now!"
And after that came only the ending rings.
Celeste set her phone back on her bedside table and focused on the other side of her bed.
Damien was no longer there, having stayed with her during the windy night, but his side was still warm, so he had clearly left less than an hour ago.
Of course Celeste would have preferred a life where her husband had never been turned into something inhuman, and they could enjoy moments of affection without the worry or the call for cruel tasks.
Of course she did, and of course Damien did as well whenever he had the time to organize his thoughts, but at least they still had each other, so it wasn't the worst case scenario, because Celeste couldn't begin to imagine just how miserable her life without him would be.
She had experienced that during the first week after he, unknown to everyone else, had died, and she didn't want to ever experience it again.
Celeste was aware that Damien would be the one to suffer that experience eventually, as he no longer aged while she still did, but she hoped that she would live long enough to get him to come to terms with that reality.
For now though, they both just had to keep making the best out of this insane situation.
#october practice#op day 2#writing practice#my writing#Merged conscious#mc celeste#mc mason#mc damien#just making up tags#uvpartybomb#might add more tags later
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the weird Yuuniverse concept tuu(?)
🐱
So I'm debating whether or not to make it another great 7 Yuu or not, but basically,
Yuu if following the plot of NRC and stuff blah blah blah. They eventually however meet someone in the Mirror, Yuuya (the first Canon yuu). Yuuya seeks to guide Yuu and help them along their journey through twst. As stuff unfolds, Yuuya tells them the truth. They are in a time loop that will either end in Death or Failure, usually both. Yuuya tells them of the past Yuus, Yuuken, Yuuka and how they succumbed to their demises against the overblots and such.
Yuuya was one of the first Yuus, and they were one of the few that actually defeated malleus, sort of, they are one of the few yuus that can reset the loop. After each painful death Yuuya started losing it
They've saved everyone, they hurt everyone, they read every book and burned them, they fell in love, they destroyed. For every loop they brought peace there was one wrought with death. But even when they finally got the best possible ending, they lost. They don't remember how though, in fact whatever they went through was so horrible they begged the very first Yuu to exist to delete their memory of their death along with wiping everyones memory of them.
There in only one other Yuu that had the ability to manipulate timelines, Tuu. And they too fell into the murderous experimentation that is looping
They were the very first Yuu to ever exist. They have died to everything and had to constantly relive their deaths to perfect their times lines
They beat the blots when they were the most powerful- the beginning of the timeline, as they absorbed the excess blot/hatred off of them throughout their loops, leaving everyone with the more tame Blots of the canon.
This however made them into a monster of sorts, and stripped away everything from them. After all they came to TWST when they were a child, but they kept aging through each loop. It took away everything from them, their body as it was now made of ink, their life, their friends. Everything. They gave everyone a good ending, and get couldnt get one themselves.
And even in the end it was for nothing, because it looped again and chose another Yuu instead since there was nothing left of the original.
However not every Yuu can loop, only a select few, the main character Yuu being one of them
As Yuuya says they are rooting for them; saying they hope they free everyone, Tuu reminds them to reconsider
If you stop it then what? The students have lost years of their lives already. It doesn't bring back any of the Yuus that died for nothing, it just damns them into oblivion, breaking the loop now just created another one.
But our Yuu has power. Why not use that to bring back the others? To reign Supreme over twisted wonderland
Yuu doesn't get it, they say they are stopping the loop, they want to go home! Plus it's not like their friends will remember them anyways since they forgot all of the previous yuus, they made peace with that long ago!
"Home? Tell me Yuu, where is home?" Yuu panics as the realize all of their memories of the past seem blank, they cannot seem to even remember a blink of their childhood as it was blurry.
"I am telling you this now not because I care, but because you have done this before. We have had this conversation many times. Every time you say you can change the future it leads you right back here to us, isn't that right Yuuya?"
Yuuya frowns and nods
"Wait I've been looping this entire time without remembering and you never told me?!"
The original yuu let's out a hoarse laugh. "Yes. You see why I say instead to destroy the world entirely rather than keep up this damn horror story? You would rather let the Yuus here rot and wallow in misery than end their suffering"
"I don't like how angry you are. You're just saying that because you're upset about your ending! I'm trying to make my own!"
"Oh yuu, I already know how your ending goes" the original yuu seems to pause, and the ink that consumes their body pulls back as Yuu sees their own face reflected back at them.
"No..."
"Yuu, you become me. I have had this conversation with you, with myself, hundreds of times now, no matter what we do, it always results in me. Don't you get it? Your memories are blank because you never had a life, a childhood. You've been stuck in this loop trying to save yourself over and over. They took everything from us. Our life, our home, our family, our body!" Tuu gestures the ink that consumes them. "I saved everyone! Turned them into their best selves, they turned us into this! Left us to rot! Look at us! Do you seriously want to continue living like this?"
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Which EP that make your into ginzura ?!
I know who you are, and you know you don't want to hear this. There wasn't any episode, I first watched the series almost ten years ago and distanced myself from it because it was making me physically sick worrying about characters. I remember looking for Ginzura and not finding anything but not being particularly attached to it. Like I didn't really see g*nhiji so I figured Ginzura had at least as much reason?
I thought the most interesting relationship was between Gin and Kagura (NOT sexually or romantically, I was just fascinated by them.
When I saw that the series was all on Crunchyroll (as far as I knew except the love potion arc which I wasn't a fan of in the manga so I decided to watch the series and see how it ended. Got obsessed again. It seems like I latched on to Katsura more that time, although I remember liking him the first time through. Finally I decided to find the second movie, which I remembered liking. I was enjoying it, and then it got to the scene on the balcony where Katsura talks about the last time he saw Gin, and I was fucking run over by a 50-ton freight train of feelings. I've never had a ship hit that fast. When he started choking up it was suddenly clear that the outfit wasn't a popularity joke, Katsura was literally shattered by losing Gin. He'd lost his entire family and his Sensei and his cause and everything he'd ever cared about and he'd persisted, but losing Gin broke him. And it struck me just how miserable he was in the movie, and how no one seemed to care. Kagura flatly states that he went insane because Gin disappeared, and they go back to talking about everything else like that wasn't important. Gin makes a half joke about murdering him and goes back to worrying about Gengai. This is runaway Kotarou, his literal claim to fame is running away. He escapes all the time, even from the inescapable prison, even when he was a screwdriver. And he just sat there and let the execution happen because he was so broken down. And of course, Kagura says he talked about destroying the world, but all he talks about, both with Kondo and Gin, is how much he wants to help the world. He hates the world but he just wants to help, so badly. And he was breaking down and Gin saw the Blight guy and left Katsura and probably forgot him as soon as he was out of sight. Then during the final battle, Katsura makes the long, impassioned speech about how every single one of them is there to support Gin. If Gin hears the speech, he literally does not react at all. I wondered if this was the Katsura who had mourned Gin for ten years. Everyone else forgot Gin, but for Katsura he lost his best friend and suffered for it for a decade. Here he is finally able to do something for the person he cares about more than everything. And again, how happy would he be if Gin just took a second to acknowledge him?
And it's been the same ever since. His introduction is based on how much he values Gin, how he was willing to dirty his hands to get him back. But he accepts Gin's decision, even if he doesn't like it, and he tries to influence Gin but he never endangers him again. His next major appearance, he says the Harusame is too big for his entire organization, but when Gin says he's going, Katsura goes with him without hesitation "I'm your left hand" isn't just an idle term, he makes an enemy he's already stated he doesn't think he can defeat if it will help Gin. In Benizakura he tells Takasugi he rearranged his core beliefs based on how strong he sees Gin as. I could keep going. The constant standbys. Wanting to be in the Cartesian Arc., In the soul-switch arc he literally is willing to fight for Hijikata because Hijikata in Gin's body took him seriously and offered him a job. When he saved Gin from Nobunobu (Which again, Gin literally never acknowledges, Katsura spends most of his time talking about Gin and Gin spends the whole time playing support for Hijikata. Katsura gets his rawest line in the series, about how when you're near death you just want to be with people you care about. This reframes his asking Gin to commit seppuku with him. When he lost all hope, his one wish was to be near Gintoki when he died. Meanwhile, in the Farewell Shinsengumi arc, he doesn't get to see Gin. It doesn't even appear that Gin bothered to talk to him about Utsuro until Matako and Nobume bring it up. Gin literally fucking renamed him and it changed how his friends treated him for the rest of his life. When he stayed in the ship in The Very Final. I don't see much Ginzura in the series, but if Katsura isn't in love with Gintoki it's still obvious that a good chunk of his sanity revolves around his relationship with Gin. I truly believe there's more support for his romantic feelings for Gin than his romantic feelings for Ikumatsu, and I truly believe he cares about her and I can even see them ending up together but you cannot possibly convince me that their main bond is based around his understanding how hard it is to lose the one you love to the cause. And every time I see Katsura I want to throw a supportive Gin at him, even for a minute, even for a single panel, and it never happens. So I write.
Obviously this is all my opinion. If you really want to discuss it that's fine, but if you just want to tell me how wrong I am I'm aware my opinions are very different from most of the fandom. When I say you can't convince me it's because I'm stubborn as fuck and I suffer from cognitive rigidity, not because I think I'm the smartest person on the internet. Just assume you're right
#don't @ me not tonight anyway I'm having emotions#ginzura#obviously#if you can convince me there's canon proof Gin cares abou5t Katsura I'll give you 300 yen#but I can tell you now it's not gonna happen
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Bro Mask really woke up and suddenly his brothers were fighting
Anyway I am once again asking for the commentary on this update because you got me in SHAMBLES Frankie. SHAMBLES. HOW CAN I reCOVER-?!
I love this story to bits <33
You guys were very prompt with the commentary requests, which just amazes me. Like, you all actually like to hear what I have to say?? Wild.
Like always, this contains spoilers so proceed at your own risk.
This is probably one of my favorite past sections I have written in a while, mostly due to how it has that duel scene that I have been wanting to write since the start of this story
However, if this section had one major flaw, it's the pacing; there's three major arguments between the engineer and Link that could have been condensed down to two.
Low key, one of the saddest moments this chapter is when the child asks Link to promise to make sure he comes back, and Link does not. If there was ever any evidence needed to show that he's an asshole, it's that
The Fierce Deity mask attaching itself to the child's hands was not in my original plan, but I realized that there was no one the engineer wouldn't attempt to destroy the mask once he took it off of the child
Here's what happened off screen: the engineer pulled the mask off while thinking about tossing it away, which made the Fierce Deity say "fuck you I'm gonna body horror this child now"
The engineer asking what finger Link would want him to cut off is a reference to chapter 14 where Link tell the engineer that he would have to cut off his own finger if Link ordered him to-- Link forgot he said that because he didn't mean it exactly, but unfortunately, the engineer took him to his word
Originally, the engineer was going to have a monologue in the medical tent where he talks about how he's feeling and how little he trusts Link; I cut this since the engineer is more enthralling when the reader doesn't know exactly what he's thinking
There are some parts of that monologue I really like that I wish I could have kept; hopefully, what he has to say will appear elsewhere in the story
So that duel... that was so satisfying to write, and it's a bit of a relief to have it out of my system and into the world
Chapters 4 and 5 established the fact that Link and the engineer were technically Knights of Hyrule, which I don't think I reiterated elsewhere; so hopefully you guys remember plot details from over a year ago
Also, remember when Meemaw said that Link and the engineer had a very public argument in chapter 5? This is that argument.
If there is one thing I don't like about the duel, it's the implications that the civilians of Hyrule have a homogeneous opinion about the use of child heroes; I've been avoiding making groups have unanimous perspectives like that, but it felt a little unavoidable here. I still tried to say that not everyone agreed, but I don't know if I was successful or not
There is no more perfect demonstration of the engineer and Link's characters than how that duel ended: the engineer happy to stop when he did the minimum amount of damage needed to win, and Link responding with overblown violence
As far as I am aware, how Link and the engineer got their scars was the plot point that readers speculated on the most; I think a lot of people connected the two together, which I am very happy about
Okay, onto the present
Some of you may have guessed it, but the hand funeral was not in the original plan, but there were so many jokes about What Hyrule Did To Warriors's Arm that I ended up thinking about it too hard and fell in love with the idea of the boys having a small funeral for it
That being said, because it was not part of the original plan, I really screwed myself over and ended up having to restructure a lot of the scenes to make it work; I don't know yet if it was worth it, but I do like how the funeral signals an end to the Warriors's torture misery plotline
This part also suffered under my space restraints as I did not expect the duel to be as long as it was, so a lot of things got trimmed or cut
Here is a short list of things that were removed or changed: more importance on Lincoln and Four leaving for a few days, Lincoln gifting Warriors soap (and Warriors being mad that it was actually a good gift), Linkle arriving separate from Sky and Lana, Cia talking about Age of Calamity as one of the many paths Wild's life could have taken, the boys meeting some Skullkids in the Lost Woods, Hyrule joking about finding Lincoln hot, Four talking about the Four Sword with Warriors, Sky talking to Warriors about their shared trauma, Lincoln saying his goodbyes and leaving, more Lana and Link content, Linkle solving an important plotline, and more!
Writing Proxi this chapter has been interesting as I felt like I was speed-running trying to convey what her relationship with Warriors is like as it had never occurred to me that the reader wouldn't see how their relationship started in the past before we met up with her in the present
There was a point of time I considered having Proxi be a mirror to Warriors's emotions instead of an interpreter to them; so Warriors would be shouting in what appeared to be anger while Proxi would be sobbing in fright
I scraped this as it only worked if Proxi didn't have her own emotions, which while a fun idea, meant she had less agency
The way the fandom treats Cia is very interesting to me, as she is one of the only villains who is redeemed at the end of the story. Yet, because of her attraction to Warriors, she's often still treated as a villain. In fact, her villainy is always reduced down to her sexually assaulting Warriors. The fact that she is un-corrupted at the end of story is more fascinating to me, which meant that I had to decide what a not-evil version of Cia would be like
The answer I landed on was "Weird New York Art Girl"
Cia's main hobby is refurbishing the temple and abbey; there was originally going to be more gags of her doing a variety of projects to fix it up, including gardening, woodworking, and masonry
Hyrule's disdain for Cia is actually one of my favorite parts of the chapter; having arrived at the temple first, he had a lot of alone time with her where he got increasingly upset that she wouldn't give him a straight answer about who was okay or not
Cia's prophecy/warning to Time might seem on the nose, but this is actually vague version; my original idea gave away way too much of where the story is going
Wild's speech about remembering/knowing could have been cut for space, but I kept it exclusively so that I can finally give Wild a moment; I just do... so little with him....
So... let's talk Sky
In chapter 4, there is a moment when Warriors is giving everyone the contingency plan where Warriors asks Sky if he ever killed someone, to which made Sky uncomfortable; I wouldn't call that foreshadowing, but that moment happened exclusively because I knew he was going to kill one of the knights
Originally, I was going to have Sky kill Faiza; I changed that last minute because I was uncomfortable killing off the one not-white human in the Knights of Hyrule off screen and it seemed too cruel to kill off someone who is pregnant
So, yeah. Killing off Faiza was not a good idea
I killed off Clementine instead as I felt like I could make her death impactful while keeping it off screen
So, Sky lost his finger; any information about what exactly happened to him is going to stay vague and unmentioned on purpose
Why? Sky's pain is competing with Warriors's, who we spent many chapters deep in the thick of. Nothing I could say can compete. But whatever you guys come up with in your head is going to be whatever is necessary to feel like their pain is equal; it's like when horror directors don't show the monster since the viewer's imagination will always be scarier
I feel like I should have more to say about Time and Warriors's conversation, but it really speaks for itself
I will reassure you all that the reveal is near and I won't taunt you all with it for much longer
The chapter was originally going to end with Legend explaining his story and what is going on with Midna, Twilight, and Wind, but we ran out of space
So you will have to wait until next chapter to learn what happens next
#another thing i cut from the chapter was Wild implying that he slept with Cia in part because he was peeved that Warriors had once#slept with Sidon (who Wild has been trying to bed for so long)#lol that's your bonus fact#it's not canon but knowing you all it's about to become canon the way Hyrule's joke crush on Lincoln is#linked universe#lu call them brothers#ctb lore#ctb commentary#me rambling#lu ctb#ask#anonymous#savimatteo2810
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Heard it's Fanfiction Friday
So here I am, promoting my works from different fandoms:
Living With(out) You (Good Omens) on AO3
Aziraphale x Crowley x Reader
Aziraphale went back to heaven and Crowley suffers from the loss, trying to drown out his emotions by ineffable drinking. But he forgot that he left an impression on the people around him that actually care and try to be there for him. When he finally accepts to let them closer, he begins to work out a life without his angel. At least until a certain point.
Story Notes:
This is my most recent work and still ongoing. I gotta admit that writing it is a slow process because there's so much to do in my life right now. And I find it certainly hard to add an extra character to the ineffable husbands but the idea is stuck in my brain. It's fun to be back in the game.
The focus of my story is on Crowley's way to recover. For him to learn how to live without his angel and what life can be like when you let people in. There's no unnecessary drama. It's a grown up story about themes all of us can relate to. (Also, this is my first story where I try to keep the reader gender neutral as to involve all genders. Like I said: trying. Don't know if I am doing it right).
A Feeling Of Normality (Marvel Cinematic Universe on Wattpad
Bucky Barnes × Female Reader
Who can understand the pain you had to go through better than someone who went through the same pain? The worlds of Bucky and Reader collide very soon. They develop a strong bond without needing many words but whilst the Reader learns to love Bucky's broken soul, he's still struggling to move on.
Story notes:
The story takes place in the Infinity Stone Saga between Civil War and Endgame. I tried to add the Reader without changing too much about the original story. I think my favorite detail is that I spent so much time watching different scenes to stay as close to the characters behavior and thoughts as possible.
Some Comments:
"Such an amazing story! Gave me amazing nightly reads."
"It's truly perfect. The way you describe the feelings of everyone made me fall in love with this. I also cried at many moments. [...] It was one of the best stories I read on Wattpad."
"I've loved the journey you took us on."
"This was fantastic and I loved every single moment of it!"
An Unknown Bond (Seven Deadly Sins) on Wattpad
Zeldris x female OC
The kingdom is freed from Hendrickson, when the OC named Yami feels a very strong power. The Holy War is not over. And the only way to avert the danger is for Yami to find Meliodas and fight against Zeldris and The Ten Commandments. There's just one problem: Thousands of years back, both brothers meant a lot to her and now it's time to choose a side.
Story Notes:
I'm particularly proud of this one, even though it has some writing errors. It was my first time writing an English fanfiction after a break of several years. But I hadn't finished the manga, the end of the final season hadn't been out yet and I was surprised at how close my story came to the actual storyline, even though an Own Character was added. So let's just say if you've finished Seven Deadly Sins, our endings were very similar!
Some comments:
"Been so long since I've read a wonderful book"
"I'm actually crying, thank you so much for writing this."
"Best book ever."
"I loved this book. The best fanfic ever read."
"Loved this story so much. It gave me the ignition I needed to keep writing stories, and I'm very thankful for it. So sad to see it end but so grateful to have found and read this book."
"This was great. I love the difference in the story. Not many can completely change a part of a story and not ruin it. You've changed the story so much but it's still a masterpiece. Thanks for the ride."
"Thank you for making this book. This is the type of story that can drive empty people on [...]. It was fun reading and definitely worth the time."
#fanfiction friday#self promoting#fantictions#fanfictions on ao3#good omens fanfiction ao3#good omens fanfiction#marvel#marvel fanfiction#bucky barnes#bucky barnes fanfiction#seven deadly sins#seven deadly sins fanfiction#zeldris fanfiction#seven deadly sins zeldris#winter soldier#bucky barnes winter soldier#hobby writer#writing fanfic#good omens#crowley#good omens aziracrow#good omens fandom#ineffable husbands#ineffable breakup#bucky barnes x reader#crowley x reader#crowley x reader fanfiction
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I don't think I have tourettes, but I've had tics since I was like 6. However, I've never been diagnosed with anything that could explain why. And it's not like they went unnoticed. No, I had very severe tics as a child. I never really experienced vocal tics, apart from coughing and clearing my throat repeatedly, but I did have complex motor tics that everyone was aware of.
My teachers, my classmates, my parents knew about them but they just didn't care I guess. I was made fun of for them by teachers and other kids though. I was told I was disruptive and bothering the class. Bro as if my tics weren't bothering me as well. But yeah, apart from telling me I was annoying, nobody really gave a shit lol.
They got better with age though. From the age of 12 or so my tics became less frequent and less severe than they were before. I still have them, but I can go days or even weeks without ticcing now, whereas it was a daily occurrence back in primary school.
Now that I'm older and my tics have lessened in intensity, I don't really feel the need to get a diagnosis. Sure, it'd be cool to know why the fuck this is happening. But given the point of a diagnosis is mostly to get access to treatment or accommodations, I don't really feel like I need one, since my tics are pretty manageable these days. I don't think people even notice I have them nowadays. It's mostly just my muscles tensing up, not something others would pick up on.
The reason I'm saying all of this is because an argument I've seen thrown around online as a way to discredit people with tourette or tic disorders is "I've seen videos where you don't tic at all but now you're ticcing every two seconds" or something along those lines.
And yeah, that's how tics work actually. They tend to vary in intensity. Even now that my tics are better, I still get days where they're more frequent. Some tics can go away completely over time. New tics can appear out of seemingly nowhere too. They can also change as you age. For some of us, we had really bad tics during our childhood, but now they've become less prominent. While for some others it might be the opposite, they developed tics later on in life.
This can go for basically any illness/disorder/disability btw, but we aren't a monolith. Which is why it's important to listen to as many stories as possible to get a better understanding of how a condition works. Everyone is different, so every condition is gonna present differently depending on the person.
Of course, diagnostic criteria is a thing, that's how you know someone suffers from a certain condition. But not everyone is gonna experience said symptoms the same exact way. As I've said before, I barely if ever, experience vocal tics. Doesn't mean nobody experiences them, or that if someone does they're faking. I'm just one person who exhibits one presentation of any given symptom.
Remember that medical professionals can't diagnose or undiagnose anyone from a social media post. They're straight up not allowed to, because social media isn't a 1:1 reflection of reality. We choose what we show online, things are curated. Which gives fakeclaimers even less credibility. Bro you're just some rando with a reddit account, go outside.
I didn't think this post would be so long. Shit's a goddamn novela. I'm pretty passionate about the topic, I just don't understand how weirdos online can claim to know more about someone than the person themselves. People change and so do disorders, doesn't mean it's fake.
Edit: omg forgot to mention! Just because someone isn't diagnosed doesn't mean they're faking their symptoms! You don't suddenly gain them once you're formally diagnosed.
#tics and tourettes#tics#disorders#disability#tic disorder#anti fakeclaiming#fakeclaimers dni#i hope this makes sense#this is way too long I'm sorry
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huh (Dev log # I'M ON 4?!!?!?!)
Hi guys! It’s me, @magpies4days on a different blog! That’s really the only promise I kept. Whoops. That’s why I don’t do promises. Anyways, since the last time I updated y'all, I passed all my finals and everything that was important. Yep, I passed my finals, which seems miraculous, because I accidentally studied the wrong study guide for my history exam and didn't really sleep enough the night before, and I got a 90 on it, which I'll be honest, that was the lowest grade I've ever gotten on a test in that class, but it's still an A so I won't cry about it. I turned in a really shitty essay too for one of my classes, but it seems that my professor didn’t actually read it because she gave me a 100 (ain’t gonna complain about that). I also procrastinated so hard on my graphic design final that I did it in like 3 hours and finished it 2 minutes before it was late. I still turned it in 5 minutes late because my computer decided it was funny to start acting up. Oh well, I passed that class, even for honor's standards. Normally I would be happy getting a B because I'd get a C and still celebrate but unfortunately I slayed too hard that my GPA was the minimum requirement for the Honor's organization to notice me. That's the Thinker in my Myers Briggs type showing baybee (JK JK I'm an INFP (unfortunately.)). Anyways, I’m on my winter break, and as much as I love getting breaks, god I forgot how much I hate summer and winter breaks. Summer breaks make me depressed because I have nothing to do, and winter breaks make me depressed because it’s literally the worst season of the year (cold weather (I have cold urticaria), dry air, less sun, the position of the sun is weird, and d3 barely does anything).
Anyways, onto the actual dev stuff. I probably should’ve figured this out the moment I started my idea, but I found out that to export my game to Mac, I’d have to have a developer id and pay for it. Which now I understand why most indie devs never upload to Mac. Oh well. (Fun fact: Mac actually has a feature called BootCamp which lets you portion your hard drive to allow you to have a Windows driver (Be wise on your portioning though because it’s permanent). I found this out when I was 16 and trying to download Pizza Tower demos. Totally not saying that so you could play it on your “Mac,” *wink wink*).
I had to switch my dialog stuff from a script I found on the internet, to an add-on that most Godot devs use ( Dialogic). I know. I am awful. However, there is a reason to this, and it’s entirely because I am an idiot. I have experimented with how Godot exports JSONs, and as it turns out, the images nor the audio would load! The text would, but it’s just not the same, especially when the dialog box is supposed to change with the character speaking. While it could be something in my code that is causing this to happen, or I'm forgetting to export something else while checking off all the boxes, it still gives me a headache and I decided it was for the best to switch. I may not be able to code for now, but there may be a day when I can. Hopefully. I had to change the layout of the dialog stuff because Dialogic kinda makes it like a visual novel kinda thing. I decided to torture myself and make everyone have different heights. Don't worry, everyone has relatively normal heights. Except for mayyybe Sleepy Weepy. They're like 6'2 (which may mean there's some cutoff for their sprites).
Aaaaanyways, enough about me suffering about dialog again. I’ve been working on the beginning and ending cutscene so that I can first torture everyone with 5 minutes of dialog in the beginning and then at the end music with text that may give people a hard time reading the lyrics. The animation isn’t done, but the text kinda is??? I’ll have to revise it like I have the past 56 times because my future self is hard to please, and I think everyone is out of character except Xandra.
Yeahhh, that’s about it so far. I made new music while I was being harassed with finals. Take a gander, but with your ears. Or don't, forcing you is unethical.
Top 10 Sleepy Weepy of all time!!!!! (This is doesn't even make it in the honorable mentions)
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