#( life's a bitch ; now so am i // selina kyle )

[hellherekitty]

tag drop

[oliviabelova]

"As I was saying, I’m a woman and can’t be taken for granted. Life’s a bitch, now so am I." -Selina Kyle

[magmagicstyle]

DON’T START NOW

*HURT/COMFORT*

Pairings: Bruce Wayne x male!reader, Clark Kent x male!reader

The reader and Bruce used to date until he messed up. Not being able to handle the idea of being in the same city as the millionaire, the reader goes away. Luckily for him, in his new city, there’s a nice and a bit nerdy journalist ready to make his heart flutter again. 

A/N: Hey! It’s been awhile… the only thing I can say to justify me: college is hard, kids… 

 If you don't wanna see me 

You really thought that the relationship was going to last until you both were old and you could see the children have kids and that the kids would call you grandpa. Of course, reality proved you wrong at the moment you saw him fucking Selina Kyle in the bed that was supposed to be yours and his. Her moans and cries of pleasure were quite irritating, the way he grunted and moved against her body while she made noises that made her sound like a cat in heat was so disgusting for you, it made you feel sick. The worst part wasn’t the fact that it was your first anniversary, it wasn’t the fact that he was doing this in your bed, in the bed where you laid with him a lot of times and just whispered “I love you” while he smiled and whispered “I love you” in response. No, that wasn’t the worst part, the worst part of being cheated on, was that you knew that this wasn’t the first time and that he was saying “I love you” towards her. 

Did a full 180, crazy

Thinking 'bout the way I was

Did the heartbreak change me? Maybe

But look at where I ended up

I'm all good already

So moved on, it's scary

I'm not where you left me at all, so

If you don't wanna see me dancing with somebody

If you wanna believe that anything could stop me

“Well, it seems that I’m not needed.” You said quite loudly while you entered the room and closed the door behind you. Your face was stone cold while you looked at the bastard that had the nerve to cheat on you and at the bitch that called herself your best friend. 

Bruce's face was a poem, surprise, embarrassment, maybe a little bit of guilt, but… was it guilt for cheating on you with the woman who called herself your friend? Or was it guilt that came for being caught in the act? Selina looked scared, guilty, even sad; at that moment you didn’t care enough about her. If she was going to feel guilty, she shouldn’t have fuck your fiance in the first place.

You opened the closet and grabbed two suitcases. They were Bruce’ suitcases but, to be honest, he had more than enough money, so he could buy more if he wanted to do it and well, you deserved to take something after being treated like a fool. You put them on the floor and opened them, then you started to grab your clothes and put them inside the suitcases. After you finished you grabbed a backpack and started pulling your jewels, electronics and important things that were inside the bathroom or around the room. 

“(Y/N)...” Bruce said, he was sitting in the bed, a sheet was carefully hanging around his waist and Selina had another sheet around her naked body.

“Don’t worry, I will leave and you will do whatever you want, Brucie…” you said coldly, making fun of the stupid nickname his lovers had used before he started to date you. After all, you knew that he hated that nickname, it made him feel shallow and like an idiot, but if he was going to act like it, he deserved to be called by that nickname. 

“Goddammit, (Y/N), I didn’t mean this to happen, not like this…” He said while standing up and grabbing your shoulder to turn you around.

That sentence and his touch combined made you snap. You were trying to be cold, trying to end this quickly because this way, you thought, it wouldn’t hurt as much as it did. You tried to ignore the crushing pain that you were feeling over your heart being broken in a thousand pieces. You were trying so hard while you picked up the things that only helped you to remember about the times when you thought you two were happy and in love. You tried so hard but he wasn’t making this easy, he was going and acting like it was nothing. Like he didn’t just destroy your life together because he decided to think with his cock. You tried but you couldn’t accept him acting like this was nothing. So you turned around and looked at him with eyes full of pain, hate and tears pouring from them. 

“And how did you expect this to happen? Tell me, Bruce. In which way did you expect me to find out about you fucking the whore that I thought was my friend? Enlighten me, Bruce, because I have no idea.” You said, while your voice was sounding so bitter and crushed.

“Do not call her a whore” He said, jaw locked and frown in his face. Of course, Bruce the hero to the rescue, you thought feeling even more hurt (if that was even possible). Of course, he was acting like you calling Selina a whore was the biggest sin in the world like he didn’t decide to throw away all your time together just for a nice fuck. 

“Oh, sure, because you love her, I forgot about that detail, right Bruce? Because you fucking love her, and I’m here, like an idiot thinking that you still loved me!” You yelled, slapping his hand away, making him look so shocked by your reaction. But let’s be honest, what did he expect? Did he think that you would just laugh this off and call it a day? Of course not, you were hurt, and you weren’t willing to stay with him anymore, so you turned around again and grabbed the rest of your things.

“(Y/N)... I…” Selina tried to call you, to tell you whatever excuse was in her mind but you stopped her by turning and looking at her with pure hate in your eyes.

“Shut up, you fucking bitch... what? You didn’t want this to happen, right? You couldn’t help yourself, right? Don’t fucking look at my face and lie to me” You finished saying this and turned around closing your suitcases and standing them up so you could easily grab them and leave the place.

“(Y/N)! Stop, I won’t let you talk to her this way.” Bruce said, clearly angry at you, but you didn’t care, you were hurt, he hurt you and he didn’t care about it, he only cared about his lover. 

“Oh, boo hoo, so sad, Brucie is angry at me for insulting his whore, what am I going to do? Let me think...” you said while moving and putting your hand under your chin, pretending to think for a few seconds while you faced him. Suddenly, the ring on your left hand shined and made you notice it, almost like a divine sight.

“Now I know! I’ll fucking leave.” You said and took off the engagement ring. Then you threw the ring towards Selina and grabbed your suitcases, turning around one last time and walking towards the door of the bedroom. 

“Have fun with your boyfriend, Selina, well, of course, until he cheats on you with one of your friends… wait, you don’t have friends so you will be fine, right?” You said and walked until you were outside of that hellish mansion. 

“Master (Y/N)!” You heard Alfred yell and walk towards you. He looked quite regretful and sad, and even if you wanted to be able to lash out to him, to ask and yell at him for not telling you or not keeping Bruce under control. Even if you wanted to be able to blame someone else besides the man that you thought loved you. You knew that you couldn’t blame him for not being able to control every step Bruce took.  

“Alfred… tell the kids that if they want to, they can call me any time… and also, if you need me to play chess, have some tea and talk, call me.” You said with a sad smile on your face and hugged the man. Alfred hugged you back and just let out a deep sigh, then he gave you the keys of one of Bruce’s cars. 

“Alfred?” you asked confused.

“A car cannot replace a broken heart, but it can be useful to pursue a new life and also, Master Bruce deserves a little punishment for acting like a dumb teenager.” He said and helped you put the suitcases in the trunk of the car. 

“Goodbye, Alfred.” You said with a soft chuckle.

“Goodbye, Master (Y/N)”

At that moment you hoped on the car and started to drive, you didn’t know your destiny but you just knew that you didn’t want to be anywhere close to Bruce and Selina.

Don't show up, don't come out

Don't start caring about me now

Walk away, you know how

Don't start caring about me now

Aren't you the guy who tried to

Hurt me with the word "goodbye"?

Though it took some time to survive you

I'm better on the other side

I'm all good already

So moved on, it's scary

I'm not where you left me at all, so

You were in Metropolis. After what happened, obviously, the media of Gotham started to talk about the hot news and “the dazzling couple” of the moment. Some people thought that Bruce was an asshole for dating a woman just after your breakup, even talking about how the breakup was probably due Bruce being a playboy unable to keep it in his pants. Other people supported his choices and thought that it was a good thing that Bruce stopped acting so, like they said, “delicate”, obviously wanting to say gay. The other group didn’t care enough about the topic. But even if some people supported you, every newspaper, magazine, or tv was talking about the new couple, about how good they looked together and just stuff like that, and if you had to be honest, you weren’t comfortable with the idea of seeing your ex and his lover in every part of the city, 

So you left. You left Bruce's car with Dick and then bought a plane ticket and just flew to the nearest city that you could think of, and that was Metropolis. You started to get more modelling work there and decided to concentrate more in your career since you couldn’t do that while dating Bruce. Then you just started to get invited to different parties. So, in hopes of forgetting about Wayne and Kyle, you kept going to the parties, drank different things, and even tried some drugs, always being careful so you wouldn’t end up being addicted to something. You danced around with other celebrities, and the Metropolis’ newspapers that also talked about Bruce and Selina at first, started to talk about you and how you became a party spirit after being “freed” from Bruce’s claws.  

The media in Metropolis stopped portraying Bruce as a guy who was freed from you, and started to see you as a model who gained his freedom and his humour back after being cheated on (yes, the rumors about Bruce’s affair became so strong that now all the media commented about it like it was a fact, which it was, but nobody had real evidence besides you and the couple). Some girls took you as an example of self-love and improvement after a bad relationship and in general, after a bad period of time. Obviously, this meant that you had more work as a model and that you even got invited to some tv shows. Your agent even told you that this was the perfect opportunity to publish some of the stories and novels that you had written a few years ago, so you did. Of course, this also was something that caught the newspaper’s attention, after all, they didn’t have the opportunity to talk about how the ex boyfriend of a millionaire was a model, writer, and one of the most liked persons in the whole city. This helped you to get your head off Selina and Bruce and just helped you to get better in general, so you kept going to different shows, took more work, published more stories and just enjoyed your time in this new city. 

This didn’t mean that you had forgotten everything about your life in Gotham, the kids called you from time to time, to know about you, to see if someday they could travel and visit you or to just hear your voice once more. And, to be honest, you were so glad that they didn’t forget about you after your breakup with Bruce, even Alfred called you from time to time, to see if you were planning to go back to Gotham so you and he could have a nice play of chess. But, every time you answered that even if you were feeling better and you were doing just fine in Metropolis, you weren’t sure if you wanted to go back to Gotham, not even for a visit. Still, after saying this, you told him that no matter what he could go to Metropolis to see you with the kids and that your house’s door would always be opened for them.

As soon as you offered that, they accepted it so from time to time, the kids or Alfred, or even the whole group came around to spend time with you. Of course, you loved to go to parties with the older ones and go to amusement parks with the young boys, but one of the best things was having movie nights together. Just cuddling in the couch of your living room, while enjoying some tasty and healthy (you are fun but also need to take care of your shape to maintain your career) snacks. They didn’t talk about their father and the last thing you knew from them about him was that they had fought over his stupidity. Usually you would act like the peacemaker between them but that wasn’t your job anymore and if you had to be honest, you weren’t interested in working for Bruce again. 

If you don't wanna see me dancing with somebody

If you wanna believe that anything could stop me

(Don't, don't, don't)

Don't show up, don't come out

Don't start caring about me now

Walk away, you know how

Don't start caring about me now ('Bout me now, 'bout me)

You met him at one of your parties. A few months prior you started to host parties and not only attend them like you were doing before. After all, hosting parties was a good opportunity to meet more people that worked in the same field as you and that could help you get more gigs or other types of opportunities. This was one of the most “open to the public” types of parties, some people from the media, famous models, actors, singers, or just the socialites of Metropolis.

When you saw him, the first thing you thought was that he looked quite charming, handsome and even a bit sexy.  Even if, when you saw him, it was just after he was being dumped by a black-haired woman, that you supposed was his (now) ex-girlfriend, in a gorgeous dress; he looked quite charming. In fact, if you had to be honest with yourself, the sight of him being all confused and almost looking like a sad puppy, was quite adorable. So, not wanting to see this handsome and cute man sad anymore, you made your way towards him, grabbing two glasses of wine on your way and just thinking about what you could do to make him smile again, knowing that he probably had the most beautiful smile ever. While you walked towards him, you had to give your greetings to different people that were dancing or drinking around the place. Some of them looked at you with envy and others with desire, it didn’t matter, you only had had for the blue eyed beauty. 

“Hey there, mister…” You said with a little smile on your face while you stopped in front of him, offering one glass to the black haired man and hoping that he was kind enough to tell you his name. 

“Kent, Clark Kent…” He said, while grabbing the glass and looking a little bit awkward. His reaction made you think that maybe he was quite shy around strangers, or maybe being in a party like this wasn’t exactly his scene. Well, you couldn’t blame him, parties weren’t your scene before you started to go to more of them.

If you had to be honest, he really looked like a lost puppy. This fact was making you want to cuddle him and protect him from the psychos (and probably, ex-girlfriends) that lived in this world (luckily for you, most of the psychos lived in Gotham). In fact, you actually cooed towards him and showed him a delicate and caring smile, making him blush softly, and give you a little but nervous smile. You were right, even this type of smile from him, was so gorgeous.

“I’m (Y/N), nice to meet you, Mr Kent,” You said and raised your glass making a little toast. “For our meeting” You finished with a smile on your face and a soft gleam in your eyes, looking quite happy.

“Oh, sure…” He said, also raising his glass. “Wait… (Y/N)? Like the model?” He looked at you directly with a surprised expression on his face.

“The one and only.” You answered with a smirk, loving the fact that he wasn’t polite or kind when you talked to him first because he knew who you were but mostly because that was the way he was. You were done with all the fake people around you that only cared about your new fame and your reputation.

“It’s so good to meet you, thank you so much for the invitation.” He said with a big smile on his face and a soft but amusing gleam on his eyes. Alright, you had to admit that his smile made your heart skip a beat and well,  maybe he wasn’t only a shy puppy like you thought at first. “To be honest, in my work we’ve been trying to get an interview with you for a while… but as you obviously know, you seem to be quite busy.” He said with a soft but deep chuckle, and lord, what a nice and deep voice he had.

“Well, if you are so thankful and want to have an interview… I could use some company,” you said with a little and sly smile while putting your hand on his arm and trying to hide the soft gasp that wanted to escape from your lips when you felt his hard muscles under your touch.

“It would be my pleasure.” He answered you with a smile and offered his arm for you to hang from him, his smile turning into a playful smirk while he noticed your surprise thanks to his body, feeling the sudden need to know you better, to talk to you and maybe, just maybe, to kiss you.

You gave him a little but honest smile. Your eyes shone with the expectations of meeting someone that seemed as interesting as Clark. Inevitably your mind started to wonder about the fact that maybe Clark wasn’t a puppy but a nice wolf ready to play with you if you asked for it. That only thought turned your little smile into a playful one, and in that moment you thought that maybe this party was going to be more promising than what you thought at first.

Up, up

Don't come out, out, out

Don't show up, up, up

Don't start now (Oh)

Up, up

Don't come out, out

I'm not where you left me at all, so

“Babe… babe… baby… honey… love… bunny… Baby!” You said with a soft and a bit needy whine.

“Yes, hun?” Clark said with a small smile on his face, magnificent deep voice making you smile inevitably and since his dark-framed glasses were resting in the little nightstand, his gorgeous blue eyes were looking directly at you while his fingers caressed your cheek.

“Do you really have to go today? Can’t you just… stay here and rest with me? Maybe have some grown-up fun.” You said with a smirk that had the intention of being seductive. 

Of course, calling sex as ‘grown-up fun’ made your boyfriend laugh softly. After all, with you, talking about just fun could be anything, sex, play a video game, run around your house with nerf guns or even, just lay on your bed while cuddling was fun for you. You were just like that, you didn’t need a lot of things or fancy stuff to be happy together and that was so special in your relationship. When you were together, you didn’t need to be the perfect model and the shy but smart journalist, you didn’t need to keep appearances or try to impress the people around you. Clark didn’t need to be the wonderful and perfect hero that he was in front of the citizens when he was showing himself as Superman and you didn’t need to act like a crazy party model, and that was just so perfect. Besides, Dick, Jason, Tim and even Damian loved him. You weren’t sure why they warmed up to him so quickly but you accepted it when they told you that you would know with time. 

“I have to go… you know this mission is important and that the team needs me…” He said with a soft sigh, caressing your face and hair, getting closer to you so you were almost laying on top of him, since you were already cuddling. 

“I can cuddle for a couple of minutes but then I have to fly…” He said with a relaxed smile, knowing that this was going to be enough to keep you happy for a couple of minutes before he had to go. 

Clark hated the idea of leaving you. The idea of going away from home to fight some villain was quite awful for him, since it meant that he was going to leave you alone and unprotected. But he knew that he needed to be there, and he knew that deep down you understood him. After all, he really loved helping people and you were so proud of him because of that.

You knew that Clark was Superman. He had told you about it after you decided to make your relationship official. So, one of your date nights, while you were cuddling in your bed and watching a movie, he had confessed everything. Of course, at first it was hard to believe, almost thinking that he was making some weird type of joke, but after he explained more and showed you that he wasn’t joking, you began to understand different things about his behaviour and his weird explanations for the sudden “work trips”. 

So, you were aware of his different fights and at some point you decided that you weren’t going to just stand there while he fought the bad men and got hurt from time to time. This meant that you decided to help him. Of course, when you told him that you were going to aid him he got quite mad. The idea of you putting yourself in danger just so you could help was something that he did not wish for. So, the fight between the two of you kept going until you talked about the things you thought you could do to help and he realised that you weren’t talking about fighting by his side, but to help him recover from injuries and to write some of the articles he had to do for his daily job. Eventually he accepted the idea and everything was alright again.

Just as he had promised, Clark stayed with you for a few minutes before flying away. You let out a soft sigh and sat down on the bed, knowing that even if your boyfriend was strong and probably more powerful than whoever villain he was going to fight, you couldn’t help but to get worried for his safety. After a few minutes -or half an hour, but who counted, right?- of you worrying for him, you decided to stand up and start to cook for the next day. You were planning to do something simple like a pie or a cake, after all, you wanted to be able to concentrate on the mail meal tomorrow and this was the best way to do so. Clark and you had planned a nice day so he could introduce you to the league and you thought that the best way to do it was to let you host the meeting. You wanted everything to be just perfect, after all, you knew that the league wasn’t only Clark’s colleagues, but also his friends, and you wanted to be accepted with them since the two of you were dating for almost a year. 

If you don't wanna see me dancing with somebody

If you wanna believe that anything could stop me

Don't show up (Don't show up), don't come out (Don't come out)

Don't start caring about me now ('Bout me now)

Walk away (Walk away), you know how (You know how)

Don't start caring about me now (So)

Clark was by your side, his caring and big hands on your waist while you let your back lean on his chest. The two of you were standing in front of a mirror, and while Clark wasn’t wearing the glasses that kept his hero persona hidden, he was in civilian clothes. You were also wearing casual clothing, comforting yourself in his touch while you tried to relax and just avoid the nervousness that was creeping over your throat.

“Everything is going to be fine… they are going to love you, really” Clark said with a big and relaxed smile on his face, trying to calm you while he caressed your body over your clothes.

“Are you sure? Maybe what I cooked won’t be tasty enough… or maybe they hate the dessert… or... “ You started to ramble while leaning even closer to Clark. It was almost as if you were trying to hide under his touch.

“Stop, they are going to love you just as much as I do…” He stopped you in the middle of your rambling, leaving soft kisses on the side of your face and then pulled away, making you turn around so he could kiss your lips briefly. 

You were about to stand up on your toes so you could kiss him again but you stopped when you heard the doorbell ringing. You knew that this sound meant that the league was already on your doorstep, you weren’t sure who would be the first to arrive but you decided that you couldn’t postpone this situation anymore. So you took a deep breath, kissed your boyfriend one more time and then started to walk towards the door of your house, involuntary smiling when you heard Clark’s footsteps right behind you.

In front of you were a couple of people that had kind smiles on their faces. Diana and Barry, like Clark had introduced them to you, were quite kind and easy to talk to. As soon as they arrived they commented about how wonderful your house looked and they talked about the food smell that promised a wonderful meal. Soon enough the four of you were talking and enjoying each other's company while you waited for the rest of the league to arrive. You were in the middle of a story when you heard the doorbell. Clark, being the sweet heart that he usually is with you, went to open the door while you stood up and started to pour more drinks to your visits and the new guests. 

“Well, hun, apparently most of them decided to come at the same time…” Clark said with a chuckle while he entered the house with almost everyone from the league following him. 

“Well, this means that we can start serving lunch, don’t you think, babe?” You turned around with a smile on your face. Smile that disappeared from your face and couldn’t help but gasp while showing your surprise when you saw, not only the kids, but Bruce walking behind your boyfriend. Bruce also looked surprised, and if you had not lost your power to be able to interpret his expressions, he looked a bit horrified. 

“(y/n)?” He asked while looking directly at you, his eyes fixed in your figure standing a few steps away from him. 

You knew you looked different, you knew that seeing you in this house, with a new boyfriend, looking so relaxed and happy wasn’t something he expected. You knew that he didn’t wish for you to be unhappy, but he probably thought that you wouldn’t be able to love somebody in a long time. Oh, he was quite wrong about that. But being totally honest, he didn’t have a right to judge you in any way. After all, the breakup was because he couldn’t keep it in his pants while being with that woman. 

“You are Clark’s partner...?” He said after a few seconds. 

You knew he couldn’t judge you in any way. You knew he didn’t deserve a thing from you after all what he did. You knew all of this. But still, you couldn’t help but shiver while looking at the man that with his affair, pushed you to go away from your city and leave the kids that you considered yours. 

“Long time no see…” You finally said like an answer, while looking at the other man and walking closer to Clark. You man, noticing your reaction, walked the steps that were necessary until he was close enough to put his arm around your waist. It was clear. With this action, Clark was saying “back off”, he knew about your breakup, he wasn’t sure about the circumstances because the one time he asked you explained that you didn’t want to talk about it and he understood. But he knew that there was something wrong with the way you reacted towards Bruce and he wasn’t going to leave you by yourself while you were feeling insecure or bad about something. 

“Why…?” You started to ask while looking at the man in front of you. He was wearing a simple shirt and pants, it wasn’t totally casual but if you thought about it, Bruce was never casual. Still, his attire didn’t explain why he was there like it was fine, like he didn’t enter a place full of superheroes.

“Wait… Are you Batman?” You finally asked while looking at the man with big and a bit surprised eyes. 

Of course, when you were dating you had some suspicions. After all, the man tended to disappear in the middle of the night and then appeared like there was nothing happening. But at that moment, most of your thoughts were about him going to fix some problems in the office. After all, being the owner of a company as big as his wasn’t something easy. So when every time that you asked about him going away, he told you that he was working, you believed him. Certainly like a fool since he was lying to you straight to your face but, still, you believed in him. 

After that train of thoughts you couldn’t help but think about your kids, and then about the young heroes that were with Batman from time to time, and as easy as adding two plus two, you had the whole picture in your mind. At that moment you were ready to yell at him, to explode with rage towards the man who endangered your children without even caring if you knew about it or not. Because yes, your relationship with Bruce was brief and quite rushed (biggest example; being engaged to the man after months of dating) but since the moment you met the kids you knew that they were your children and that you had to protect them. You were ready to scream with anger towards him but you stayed quiet, not really because you wanted to, but because at that exact moment Bruce had no better idea than to talk again..

“I know that you already made all the connections about it but yes, (y/n), I’m Batman… now, care to explain why you are dating Clark?” He asked looking at you like you’ve done something bad. Like he had the right to judge you and lecture you about your love life.  

“Well, Bruce…” You started while putting your hand over Clark’s free hand, caressing the fingers that weren’t hugging your waist like he was ready to fly away at any moment. 

“I don’t really have to explain anything to you, you know? In fact, I feel like I’m the one who needs an explanation, maybe about the fact that you are my ex-fiancé and I didn’t know about your little hero persona, or about how you decided to hid from me the fact that my kids are also heroes and that they are in danger every night without me knowing about it…” You said while looking at the man that surprisingly looked a bit nervous under your gaze, then you looked at the children who shifted nervously and looked a bit scared when you told them that the conversation with them was going to be later. 

“(y/n), you are a civilian, if you knew about all the hero stuff, you would be in danger.” Bruce said in a tone that pretended to show him as calm and collected. But you knew him, at least, you knew this part of him. Bruce was scared, he was nervous because he didn’t even think about him being caught by you. Maybe he thought about you being so dumb that you never noticed the signs of him being Batman or maybe he just didn’t expect for you to discover him since you have broken up a while ago, in any case, it didn’t matter since you did discovered him. 

“Yeah, try another thing buddy… also, me being in a relationship with Clark? Because yes, Bruce, we are in a relationship, it isn’t your concern, you are my ex fiancé, because you wanted to be my ex fiancé, you ruined our relationship and that made me walk away…” You made a pause while you looked how he seemed almost hurt by your words. Clark’s hold on you became a bit more tight, but he didn’t say anything, knowing that you needed to do this by yourself so you could be calm again. He was also quiet because he was really surprised by the whole situation. To be honest, the whole group that was around you (except your kids because they knew that their father was an asshole towards you and they knew how the whole relationship ended) was watching the interaction with surprise in their eyes. After all, it was surprising the idea of seeing someone snap at Bruce and even more surprising the fact that he seemed affected because of it.

“So, Bruce… I won’t be against you being here and enjoying a nice evening with the league, children and my boyfriend… But I won’t allow you to come to my house and to demand for an explanation that you don’t deserve… are we clear?” You finished talking while crossing your arms over your chest and looking directly at the man that you could finally say was nothing to you. For a few seconds, Bruce remained in silence, looking at you with a frown on his face. Confusion, anger and maybe a bit of regret were all over his face in an expression that you couldn’t fully interpret. He almost seemed conflicted, but when you thought that he was going to argue with you, he just let out a sigh and looked at you with a sad smile.

“Yes, (y/n), thank you for inviting us to yours and Clark’s home…” He said towards you before nodding and starting to walk inside your living room. 

Soon enough, the children hugged you and after a few words of apology for keeping their secret identities from you, they walked inside the living room being followed by the rest of the league. All of them greeting you and complimenting the decorations of the house. The rest of the day was spent in the middle of conversations, eating food, you being complimented for your cooking skills, and fun stories that helped to clear the air between you and Bruce. You weren’t friends, you weren’t going to try to be friends, but at least you weren’t hostile towards one another and it was all thanks to the people around you. 

When the sunlight started to disappear and the food was almost over, the members of the league considered you a new friend and they slowly started to go towards their houses. After talking with the children, you came to the agreement that they were going to stay with Clark and you for the weekend. Then, when almost everybody was gone, you stood while leaning on the door frame of your house, Bruce was in front of you, looking directly towards you with a smile on his face that didn’t reach his eyes. He wasn’t faking the smile, but you knew that like before, this smile was full of sadness. 

“I lose you forever, right?” He asked softly, almost in a whisper and like a year ago, you remembered him whispering the same voice a quite adorable and caring ‘I love you…’ 

“Yes…” You answered and put your hand on his cheek, smiling towards him with the same sad and tired smile that you couldn’t help but to show him.

“Does he make you happy? Really happy?” He asked and you just closed your eyes while nodding before opening them again when you felt his hand caressing yours. 

“I’m sorry for hurting you… It’s good that you are happy and I hope that we see each other again...” He said before pulling away and starting to walk towards his car before going inside and driving away.

You weren’t friends, you probably would never be friends again, and you knew that he was sorry, that he missed you. But you were sure that he knew that he lost you at the moment he even thought about cheating on you. He knew that you weren’t going to be back with him, and that being back in your life would be hard and painful for you and him. So he did what he thought was for the best and walked away. If some day you wanted to give him an opportunity to be friends, he would be grateful and take it, but he wasn’t going to show up again to try to win you back just so he ended up ruining everything. He wasn’t going to hurt you again if he could avoid it. 

Up, up

Don't come out, out, out

Don't show up, up, up

Walk away, walk away (So)

Up, up

Don't come out, out, out

Don't show up, up, up

Walk away, walk away, oh

[marisandini-chu-blog]

Bruce Wayne is a Simp for Bad Bitch

OmG I can’t believe I’m writing the obvious but the idea is in my head and I need a place to word vomit. 

Okay, so it occurred to me that Bruce has a more serious and intense relationship canonically with three women, as far as I know; Andrea Beaumont, Talia Al’ghul, and Selina Kyle. All of whom are the epitome of Bad Bitch with the capital B. (Yes, I’m ignoring Rachel Dawes from Nolanverse. The only thing I like about it is the Iconic Joker. No batman movie is good enough without the Batfam.) 

Why do I raise this point, you might ask? Well, that’s because I want to rant that Bruce, my boy, my man, my childhood comfort character is actually a SIMP?!?!

Like... I’m just... urgh.... okay... I am very vocal for a healthy relationship with commitment and based on mutual love and respect. So the fact that Bruce has only bad, iffy, or casual relationships really want to tear my hair out. And why my heart don’t want to ship with any of them, even though BatCat is one of my favorite pairing! 

I am a WonderBat shipper because I love watching them in JLAU as a kid and even though I’m not slash shipper unless it’s canon, SuperBat made much more sense to me. Heck even a threesome with the Trinity would have been healthier relationship rather than whatever Bruce had with the three of them and here’s why: 

You might not have heard of Andrea, but she’s canon from the Timmverse movie called Batman and the Mask of Phantasm which is A REALLY GREAT MOVIE. Totally recommend. One of the best Batman movie at all times (Yes, I say Batman movies not Batman Animated movies). Has great plot twist and good pacing. so Spoiler Alert! Andrea was Bruce’s fiancé, making her possibly Bruce’s first love, before his journey and possibly could have stop him from becoming Batman (I would say he’s a simp in this case, but he would have had a much more happier, healthy household so it’s not bad thing) if she hadn’t disappear for being a Mob Boss’ Daughter!!! 

I repeat, a mob boss’ daughter. 

And she came back only to be a mask avenging assassin that went toe-to-toe with Batman.

And she could have choose to stay with Bruce but she didn’t because she choose vengeance over him. Like.... Bats, you should stop with the “I am Vengeance” routine you’ve got going on because she does it better than you ngl. 

So she left and I cried at the end of that movie because trauma wasn’t enough, you put heartbreak after heartbreak to my boy. Thanks DC. 

Then there’s Fucking Talia Al’ghul which is a no brainer why she’s not Bad but BAD. Like, Talia groom Jason, supervise Damian’s harsh, brutal, and abusive training, control Damian through the implant spine to kill Dick, orders Damian execution before regretting it, DRUG BRUCE when CONCEIVING DAMIAN!!! And that’s only the top of my head. 

And if you want to blame it on Morrison’s writing, THAT’S FINE. We’ve bitched about Tom King’s writing enough to know it’s valid. 

But, BUT, bUt... it needs to be address that even before Morrison, Talia CHOOSE to stay in the League of Assassin. People can tell me that she’s a complex character that’s loyal to her father but love Bruce and that her upbringing makes her complicated or whatever. Nuh-uh. You don’t get to make Talia helpless when it suited you. Talia is a fucking Bad Bitch (TM). She’s been taught to do whatever the fuck she wants according to her belief and ideal. At some point, Talia knew she wanted to be in position of power in the League rather than staying with Bruce. 

But it’s canon that Talia, if I remember correctly, doesn’t like Gotham or Bruce’s mission. She thinks being a hero is beneath them or whatever. And doesn’t understand why Gotham is special to Bruce. So yeah, you might not agree how Morrisons write her. But do not fucking tell me she’s not a character who will not be willing to do what she thinks it’s necessary to get what she wants, including training her son as an assassin. I mean, she likes being the Demon’s Daughter in the league. She may not agree with her father but Talia wants to give Damien what she wants. Power.  

Talia loves Bruce. That’s a fact. He’s probably the only person that makes her feel like she’s a person instead of the Demon’s Daughter. Bruce has a knack for that. To make people want to be better, even just a little. Talia could have chosen him, if she wanted to. The fact that she helps him so much when fighting against her father numerous times is proof enough. 

I'm highly suspecting the reason she stays is because she knows Bruce would always forgive her (SIMP ALERT) unlike her father who would straight up stab her if she ever betrays him.

I’m not saying there’s no love for her son, I’m just saying if she even looks at the batfam funny than I will raise my flamethrower on that bitch’s face. Because you can’t rely on Bruce on that. That man would give bullshit excuse for her or want to handle her himself because your “history” with her makes you entitled.  

Aaaah, don’t you just love it when there’s a great villain you can hate on so much?

I'm not saying she can't be a good person. Pre-morisson made Talia more of an anti-hero. But I do like Talia "I'mma cut a bitch" al'ghul. It's just... I like ruthless Bad Bitch like her. Though preferably she could have balance it with more of her maternal side through Damian.

Okay, I’m getting off tangent. Now comes to my favorite girl. Catwoman. Selina Kyle. The famous ship of all Bruce’s relationship sans SuperBat. 

I... am conflicted the most about this. 

See, Selina is one of the few people who understands Bruce. Who was there when he needed a shoulder to rely on. Someone who doesn’t take Bruce’s shit, and one of the constant person in Bruce’s life. 

But not... constant enough. Which is a theme of her, even in her fursona... I, I mean PERSONA, PERSONA!!! 

Anyway, I love seeing these two broken people. One handles it with violence and vigilantism, the other through thieving with a Robinhood-esque thing going on. So of course they get each other. It always helps that they try to make each other better. Selina taught Bruce to be okay of being selfish of wanting to be happy, and Bruce believed there’s good in her that makes her feel she’s not a hopeless case, y’know? It’s even canon that in one universe, they’re married and have daughter, Helena Wayne. So... yeah? Happy end! (Until they died but that’s non issue here at the moment.) 

Then Tom King (Urgh, him again) wrote Bat proposing to Cat, and by the time they’re about to be married. Selina left him at the altar. 

So yeah. 

But then they get metaphysically? Figuratively? married after the Flashpoint which they turn Thomas Wayne into a villain (At least make him from alternate universe instead of timeline!!!) and kill Alfred (WhYYYYYY?! Bruce suffered enough why do you go kill both his fathers dammit!!! Let the goddamn butler rest in peace). And basically Selina and Bruce promise each other forever. Which is sweet. BatCat Forever, am I right??? 

Yeah, here’s the problem. (And I’m just nitpicking here, okay). For all Tom King’s character assassination of Bruce, he did Selina right in one thing. Which is the fact she doesn’t like being tied down by anything.

If Talia puts importance in power. Selina puts importance in freedom and her self-independence. 

I remember as a kid watching BTAS, that Selina didn’t want a relationship with batman if it meant changing who she is. So when Selina left the altar, I wasn’t surprise at the news. Then she actually agreed to marry him, only this time, she didn’t need a judge or a paper to make the marriage legit, y’know. And I thought, yeah that’s so her. 

But the thing is Bruce. Accepts. Her. Every. Single. Time. 

Without a single thought. She asked, “Do you still want to get married?” and he asked “When?” 

Even though it’s not the first that Cat leaves him hanging. 

Tell me he’s not a simp for that. 

It’s great that he accepts her for everything she is. But I’m conflicted because Selina stays static. She stays with the cat theme in the fact she doesn’t want to held back by anything. She takes what she wants. She loves who she loves. And no one was gonna change her. But then where’s the character growth? 

Is it regressive of me to think Selina should be ‘tied down’ or express commitment when she never has been tied down before even though she loves Bruce? 

Is it not-feminist of me to think Selina has to change herself for a man? 

I just don’t like the fact Bruce and Selina enables their masked persona. Their relationship is strongly base on their cat-and-mouse chase. They nicknamed each other “Bat” and “Cat” for God’s sake. Even though yes, it’s canon that “Batman” and “Catwoman” is their real selves and their civilian life is their masks. Heck, she didn’t go for the altar because she believed (though manipulated) that making Bruce happy would make Batman insufficient, or losing him entirely (Thank Tom King for that). 

That would be true, and stay true if not for one thing. Which is some thing what Bruce has that Selina doesn’t: 

The Batfam.

Bruce’s real identity isn’t just the Batman anymore. He has to be a single father with growing children he never plan to adopt but did anyway because they needed each other. He can’t use his batman persona to be a father at his house, but he will when training them to be his partner. His family became the strength to Bruce’s fight for Justice. 

Bruce is the Batman, but he’s not everything who he is. Selina is supposed to be part of the batfamily yet sadly, I haven’t read or watch anything that has her interact with them in a positive way or actually bond with them. Heck, when Alfred inform the proposal to the batfam they were shocked and thought it was a bad idea even (And they’ve known her for almost half their life by the way.) 

The fact that Tom King implied Bruce was never happy or wasn’t happy enough without marrying Cat when his Batfam should be the source of his pride and joy?! Apparently family means nothing to Batman. Woah DC, what a great message you’re sending here. 

I guess that’s why, I was a bit iffy when Selina “marriage” with Bruce isn’t official. Because she commits to the man but she doesn’t say she’ll commit to the family (though I suppose it could be imply or I just forget stuff). The batkids are grown up enough that they don’t really need a maternal figure, but that doesn’t mean they don’t need more emotionally available people in the family. And that I haven’t seen much of her taking effort to bond with the people that’s the most important to Bruce. 

It just makes her want to commit to Batman instead of Bruce Wayne, in my eyes I guess. 

So yeah, that’s why Wonderbat and Superbat makes more sense to me. Because they’ll make an effort to be THERE for the family and they’ll be just generally be a healthier relationships because, again, emotionally available so they might talk when they have a problem instead of running off the altar when you think a Happy Batman is Bad Batman. But no, DC have to make Bruce is a simp and his life edgy. 

Anyway, I might be wrong in some things because, you know. Canon becomes a blur to me after a while. 

[organabanana]

leaves of three, let it be [2/3] || harlivy

Chapters: 2/3

Fandom:  DCU (Comics)DCUHarley Quinn (Comics)Harley Quinn (Cartoon 2019)

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence

Relationships: Pamela Isley/Harleen Quinzel

Characters: Pamela Isley, Harleen Quinzel, Selina Kyle

Additional Tags: Mentions of alcohol, mentions of batman fucking bats, most of this is straight up idiocy tbh, i just finished watching the cartoon so everyone swears like a sailor i’m sorry, rated for (ahem) happenings later on, ivy/harley/catwoman frenemies

Summary

After Harley mistakenly confesses her love and then promptly takes it back, Ivy spends some time sorting through the things she absolutely doesn't feel (and the ones she does). Selina and Harley don't quite help.

Chapter 1: Tumblr | AO3

Chapter 2: AO3

If you ever asked Poison Ivy if she’s into meditation, she’d say she isn’t.

Actually, if you ever asked Poison Ivy if she’s into meditation, she’d probably stare you down until you crumbled under the sheer weight of her judgment and apologized for ever talking to her, but that’s beside the point.

The point is, Ivy doesn’t meditate. The concept of meditation, if you ask her, goes in the same patchouli-scented box as moon-charged crystals and essential oils.

No. What Ivy does is… introspection. Yeah. She introspects. She consciously clears her mind of all intrusive thoughts. Which may sound a lot like meditation, maybe? But — she cannot stress this enough — it’s not the same thing.

So there she is. Sitting on her couch. Introspecting. And it may look like she’s staring off into the distance, but she’s actually looking at a nearly invisible, tiny little hint of a green sprout that’s managed to grow in a crack on the windowsill.

There it is. A tiny little fighter. Just like—

Nope.

No way.

We are absolutely not thinking about her. We’re introspecting. So Ivy takes in a deep breath, in through her nose, eyes fluttering closed as she exhales slowly and then opens them and tries again.

As she was saying. A tiny little sprout. She could go over there and touch it and quite literally breathe life into it. She can’t tell what kind of plant it is, but she could make it bloom if it’s a flowering species. What if it’s a tree? She could make it grow so big its roots would tear this whole building apart just like her heart was torn apart last ni—

Motherf—

“Morning, my little dill pickle.”

Selina climbs in through the window, practically gliding into Ivy’s apartment with the kind of grace that would normally make Ivy stop and stare and perhaps have a not-quite-respectful thought or two.

Listen: she has eyes. Don’t read into it.

Anyway. As graceful and ridiculously nimble as Selina is, she’s also way up high in Ivy’s shit list at the moment (second only to you know who), so today is not the day for lighthearted conversation and platonic crushes.

“Fuck you, Selina,” Ivy offers as a greeting, glancing at the plant to make sure it’s still there. And it is, of course. Selina fucking Kyle may be a bitch and a half, but she knows how to move without leaving a trace.

“Now?” Selina cocks one perfectly manicured eyebrow at Ivy, the slightest hint of a teasing smirk on her face. “I mean I was gonna offer brunch, but that doesn’t sound like the worst midday plan.”

Ivy simply stares for a moment, as if she’s forgotten if there’s one person in the world that’s absolutely immune to even her most wilting looks, that’s Selina fucking Kyle.

“Oh, come on,” Selina practically groans, “stop it. Brooding is such a teen boy move.”

“I am not brooding.”

“Right.” With one single word, Selina makes it clear that she doesn’t believe Ivy and, most importantly, that she doesn’t care enough to argue. “Anyway. Brunch? My treat.”

Ivy closes her eyes. Not meditating. Just introspecting. Just trying to channel the urge to make a full-grown sequoia grow out of Selina Kyle’s ass into something productive. One deep breath in through her nose and—

“We can have margaritas!” Selina lets out a quiet chuckle as she admires the perfectly matte black polish on her fingernails. “Yikes. Too soon?”

Fuck introspection.

“I. Am going. To fucking murder you.” Ivy stands up with every intention to make good on that promise, and Selina must read it in her eyes because for the first time since Ivy’s known her — for the first time in her life, maybe — Selina looks scared.

Well, maybe not scared.

But she is absolutely concerned.

“Fuck me, Ive, damn,” Selina takes one step back, no longer smirking, “calm down, will you?”

Ivy stops, Selina’s audacity basically jolting her out of her murderous rage. “Calm down, Selina? Fucking seriously? You did what you did and now you come here and tell me to fucking calm down?”

Selina tilts her head just so, like she’s conceding (against her will) that maybe there is a reason for Ivy to be somewhat upset with her.

“Oh, come on,” she sighs, rolling her shoulders like the tension has to leave her body somehow, and it will certainly not be via an apology, “it wasn’t even real poison.”

Ivy’s eyes widen slightly in disbelief. Does Selina think she’s mad because she thinks Harley was in actual danger?

No. No, Selina can’t think that, because Selina may be an asshole, but she’s a very smart asshole. So she must know Ivy’s well aware of Harley’s immunity to toxins. She must know that’s not even remotely the reason Ivy’s spent the last eleven hours and some change introspecting all thoughts of last night out of her mind.

For a split second, Ivy feels something similar to warmth towards Selina as she considers that maybe she’s simply ignoring the embarrassing part of the event to spare Ivy. Maybe she’s pretending this is about Harley’s physical wellbeing and not… well. The other thing.

Sadly, the split second passes.

“If it helps,” Selina says, and even before she finishes the sentence Ivy can already sense it won’t help at all, “it’s totally reciprocated.”

Ivy feels it crawling up her veins, thick like sap. She’s managed to distill plenty of emotions, turned them into tonics and toxins and elixirs and used them for her own benefit and the Green’s. She’s bottled love — well, lust — and hatred and rage. Fear, even. Insanity, ironically enough. But this.

This… this humiliation.

Oh, this is something else.

Ivy closes her eyes. In through her nose, and even the air feels like it has to go through that thick mixture of (public) pain and weakness and acknowledged vulnerability to get to her lungs.

It’s one thing to have Harley see her like this. Like that. Like last night. Defenses down and heart out there in the open like her ribcage’s forgotten its purpose. That’s fine, she figures, because it’s been the norm for years and years and years. It’s nothing new, really, to have Harley see her accidentally stumble over the line into pathetic from time to time. It happens.

But Selina.

Selina fucking Kyle.

Selina saw that and she understood what she was seeing and now she’s acknowledging it, and Ivy isn’t even mad anymore.

I mean, she is. She’s really fucking mad.

She’s just many other things as well as mad, so it’s harder to focus on it.

Out through her mouth. Slowly. And her voice is nice and even when she opens her eyes and looks at Selina once again.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Ivy lies, walking towards the kitchen like that had been her intention all along, “there is nothing to reciprocate.”

Ivy can feel Selina’s look on the back of her head. She’s not going to give her the satisfaction of turning around, of course. Selina Kyle’s ego is healthy enough as it is. But she can absolutely feel it. A look involving an arched eyebrow and narrowed eyes and possibly a smirk. Maybe the slightest purse of painted lips, if she’s going for judgmental rather than smug.

Selina is multi-faceted in her scorn.

“You have got to be shitting me, Ive,” Selina says, and Ivy still refuses to turn around, focusing instead on staring at the interior of her fridge and ignoring the fact that ninety percent of its contents are there for Harley’s all-day snacking needs.

She ends up grabbing a jug of water not because she’s thirsty, but simply because it’s the only thing in there she knows for a fact is there just for her.

“Seriously?” Selina prods, walking closer and crossing her arms over her chest as she watches Ivy methodically fill a glass of water like it’s a delicate operation that requires her undivided attention. “You’re such a fucking pussy. And I don’t mean that as a compliment.”

Ivy does turn around then, gripping the glass with perhaps a little more force than strictly necessary. In her defense, she’d much rather be gripping Selina’s neck instead.

“Once again, Selina,” she says with a slight shrug, taking a sip of cold water, “no idea what you’re talking about.”

Selina gapes at her. It’s kind of flattering, actually. It’s not every day something leaves Selina Kyle fully unable to speak. Maybe — Ivy thinks to herself, enjoying her water — she’ll never speak again. Maybe she’ll leave Gotham entirely. Wouldn’t that be just—

Ivy’s train of thought is completely derailed by something that is never a good sign: Selina Kyle is laughing.

Not chuckling. Not snickering. Not letting out one of those sarcastic giggles she likes to use to obliterate people’s entire self-esteem.

No. No, this is honest to goodness, full-on belly laughter, and it’s fucking terrifying.

“Wh— what the fuck, Selina?” Ivy asks, trying to sound less scared than she actually is. Selina’s sense of humor is not so much dark as it is downright fucked up, and if she’s finding something in this situation funny, it can only mean someone is about to get crushed, metaphorically or otherwise.

All signs point to Ivy.

“Look at you!” Selina points in the general direction of Ivy, like she’s about to rip her fashion sense to shreds. But this, sadly, has nothing to do with clothes. “Holy shit, you’re in so much deeper than I thought, this is fucking hilarious.”

Ivy takes one step back, until her hip bumps against the counter and she blindly feels around to leave the half-empty glass on it. To her credit, she still manages to try and infuse her voice with something resembling nonchalance one last time.

“You’re not making any sen—“

“Man, you’re in love, in love, huh?”

Ivy’s been shot before. So she feels like she’s not being overly dramatic when she says Selina’s words feel just like that. Like being shot right in the gut. And Ivy tries to be as stoic as she usually is when faced with things like gunshots and blunt force and bat-shaped ninja stars (holy fuck, he’s such a nerd), but she feels a bit like she’s been standing on a castle of cards for the last… however many years it’s been since she met Dr. Quinzel in Arkham, and Selina’s just figured out exactly where to blow to make it all come tumbling down.

“I mean I knew you two were into each other. Obviously,” Selina continues, and Ivy suddenly understands the exact meaning of all those expressions regarding cats and mice, “but I thought it was like… well, you know. Friends in need of a nudge towards the benefits. But this.”

Selina shakes her head, smile as wide as her eyes. She looks both surprised and delighted. Like she’s really just found out there are feelings involved in whatever lust-filled fever dream she’d interpreted as reality before now.

“And you’re the one who’s doing all the yearning. I totally thought she was the useless one. Holy shit.” Selina takes a couple steps in the direction of the window, like using a door like a normal person is simply not an option for her. “How long?”

Ivy opens her mouth, but Selina interrupts her before any sound can come out.

“Don’t answer that. I already know.” Selina waves her hand dismissively. “No wonder you’re fucking terrified. You’d be safer falling in love with an actual hyena.”

“I’m not—“

“Please.” Selina reaches the window and notices that little plant for the first time, giving it a little pat that could almost pass for affectionate if you didn’t know Selina Kyle. “So what’s scarier, Ive?” Selina almost purrs the question. “That she may not love you back, or that she probably does?”

Ivy tells herself she could murder Selina right then and there, with the help from the little plant. Hell, she could probably kill her without help from the plant.

But that wouldn’t really fix anything, right?

“Anyway!” Selina lets out a happy little sigh as she slinks out of the window and onto the fire escape outside. “No brunch, then. I’ll leave you to your brooding.” Her smile turns into a smirk then, eyes narrowed like she’s about to pounce on an unsuspecting mouse. “And don’t worry, Ive. I can keep a secret.”

Selina winks at her before she disappears.

Ivy refuses, pointedly, to think about her conversation with Selina.

She tries to go back to her introspection, but it turns out there’s no breathing in and out when your chest is full of feelings to the point of actual physical discomfort, so Ivy gives up on that, too.

She could plot. Scheme, if you will. It’s been a while since she’s gone for an actual multi-step plan to rid Gotham — and, later, the world — of parasitic CEOs profiting off nature. A bit of environmentally friendly murder never fails to put her in a good mood.

But it turns out it’s nearly impossible to come up with a solo plan without being constantly aware of the fact that going solo is no longer her default. A plan involving only herself doesn’t feel like just any random plan anymore. Now it feels like a plan without her, and that’s just— that’s just the opposite of what she needs to be thinking about right now.

So.

What’s an eco-terrorist to do when eco-terrorism is not an option?

Eight hours later she’s in her lab, hair haphazardly held in a bun with a pencil as she looks at her latest experiment through her microscope.

The little sprout from her windowsill sits right next to the microscope in a beaker serving as a makeshift flower pot while Ivy works.

“You know, if this works,” Ivy tells the sprout, eyes trained on the cell that should enter active mitosis any second now, “you’re going to be my sidekick when we take down the next big guy.”

If this works, and she can give this tiny plant the powers she hopes to give her, they can take over Gotham and the world as a team. Ivy’s always worked best with plants, anyway. Who needs—

“Red?”

Harley’s voice is uncharacteristically mellow, but it manages to startle Ivy anyway.

“Jesus, Harley,” Ivy doesn’t look away from the microscope, “what the fuck are you doing here?”

She’s not mad. Not at Harley, anyway. None of this is her fault. She’s just—

Listen. Figuring out exactly what to call what she’s feeling would require introspection, and we’re not doing that anymore.

“Oh. I uh—“ There’s something in Harley’s tone that twists uncomfortably in Ivy’s chest. “Wanted to talk?”

Ivy doesn’t want to talk. Talking, as it turns out, may be the very last thing she wants to do. But there’s that something in Harley’s voice. Something that sounds a bit like embarrassment. Like shame, even. Like maybe if Ivy were to listen in on Harley’s inner monologue right now the voice in there would sound suspiciously like him calling her a fuck-up and an idiot and—

“I’m sorry.” Ivy leaves the little plant’s cell to enter mitosis in its own time and turns to fully focus on Harley. “I didn’t mean to snap. You just startled me.”

Harley visibly relaxes. Ivy decides she hates him just that much more than she did ten seconds ago.

“Didn’t mean to startle ya,” Harley leaves her bat propped against the trunk of a giant nightshade and takes a few steps towards Ivy.

Normally, Harley has no concept of personal space. She sits on whatever surface is closest to Ivy, invading her space and making it impossible for her to fully focus on anything that’s not Harley. It should be annoying, but it isn’t, for reasons Ivy is absolutely not going to consider at this time.

This time, however, Harley hovers just a step or two away from Ivy and her microscope and her standing desk.

It feels…

It feels wrong.

“What did you want to talk about?” Ivy taps the desk and tries not to smile when Harley beams as she practically bounces to sit on it. Her legs dangle over the edge, well-worn combat boots lightly bumping against Ivy’s legs with each soft swing of Harley’s feet.

Nothing really feels wrong anymore.

“I’m sorry, Pammy.”

Ivy shakes her head. “It’s fine. You know you’re always welcome here, I just wasn’t expecting—“

“No,” Harley says, and when Ivy looks into her eyes she realizes Harley’s not going to let her pretend she has no idea what this is about, “I mean I’m sorry about the other night.”

Ivy stands up a little straighter. Takes half a step back, like that’s going to help. Crosses her arms over her chest.

“It’s fine.”

Harley tilts her head just so, bright blue eyes narrowing for a second, and Ivy sees a flash of Harleen right there staring back at her. Reading her fucking thoughts, almost. It’s unnerving.

“It’s fine, Harley,” Ivy insists, tone sharper as she takes another step back. She can hear the low rumble of every vine in her lab stirring along with her mood.

There’s a moment there, maybe a few seconds long, where they both simply stare at each other in silence. Like they’re trying to figure each other out in a way that feels completely foreign because she knows Harley, and Harley knows her, and there’s nothing to figure out. Nothing at all.

“You know—“ Harley’s voice sounds a bit brittle, like it may just break if it hits the wrong word, “you know I didn’t mean it, Pammy.”

Ivy nods. Once.

“I know.” She knows now and she knew when she first met Harley and she’s known for the last however many years it’s been. She fucking knows it’s love but it’s not love like that. She knows. “It’s fine.”

“You know Selina just got in my head, right?” Harley keeps talking, and on some level Ivy knows there’s nothing to be angry about because Harley just wants to explain. She just wants to make sure things aren’t weird between them because they’re best friends. But it feels almost cruel anyway. “You know I don’t—“

“I know you don’t love me, Harley, yes, for fuck’s sakes, I’m not an idiot.”

“But I—“

“Don’t.” Ivy holds one finger up. If she has to listen to Harley say she loves her, but just not in that way she may lose her fucking mind. “It’s fine.”

For a few blessed seconds, it feels like maybe Harley will let it go. Like maybe she’ll just drop it and let Ivy get out of this with some semblance of pride.

But that would just be too much to ask, wouldn’t it?

“I do love you, Ive, it’s just—“

“Holy shit, Harley!” Ivy raises her voice and hears the tell-tale creak of vines growing up the wall. “I know! I fucking know, all right? Selina is a dick and you thought margarita mix was a love potion and you’re not fucking in love with me, all right? I know!”

“But—“

“No! No fucking but!” Ivy swears she hears it. The little snap when she loses her last thread of control over what she’s saying and things spill out before she has a chance to filter them. “I don’t love you either, have you even considered that?”

Harley’s eyes widen in the purest expression of surprise Ivy’s ever seen in her life.

“Right!” There’s a part of Ivy that wants to stop. She wants to stop and backtrack and tell Harley she didn’t mean it because she can’t stand the thought of hurting her, and she needs her to know that of course — of course — Ivy loves her. But she just can’t right now. “I’m not secretly in love with you! All right? I’m glad you don’t love me. I’m fucking fine.”

Harley opens her mouth like she’s about to speak, but closes it without making a sound. She doesn’t look hurt, necessarily. She looks… she looks disarmed, almost. Like she doesn’t know how to react.

“I’ll just—“ Harley swallows and jumps off the desk. “We’re fine, so I’ll just leave. Yeah?”

Ivy nods. “Fine.”

“Cool. Yeah.” Harley sort of smiles, but not really. She moves a bit slower than usual as she goes back to her bat and walks towards the door, and there’s a part of Ivy that wants to stop her and fix this somehow — because it’s not fine at all — but self-preservation wins in the end.

“Remember to lock the door on your way out.”

For a second, Harley almost looks like she may say something. And for a second, Ivy almost hopes she will. But Harley just nods and walks out, and when she hears the lock snap into place, Ivy knows she’s all alone with her plants.

Right where she belongs.

[cxtsclxwss-blog]

selina kyle

[dessarious]

Misconceptions, Miscommunication, and Misinformation Pt89

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When Selina went down to the lobby the next morning she found Chloe being yelled at by what she assumed were the girl’s parents. Studying the two she was less than impressed. Being Bruce Wayne’s fiance she’d seen all sorts of affluent people and social climbers. Far too many of them either treated their kids like garbage, or ignored them entirely. Given the research she’d done after leaving the girls last night, Chloe’s mother traded off between the two, and her father bounced back and forth between the first and treating her like a princess depending on his wife’s mood. Dysfunctional was too mild a term to describe it.

“I’m not going to let you waste my money paying for one of your low rent friends Chloe. It’s bad enough you forced us to let that crippled girl stay here but at least she’s not taking up an extra room.” The woman’s tone was like nails on a chalkboard. Chloe looked to be on the verge of tears but judging by her posture and the way she was clenching her fists they were tears of rage.

“Really Chloe you need to learn some responsibility. Charity is all well and good for publicity but if you give handouts to every sob story you encounter you’ll just end up broke. Then how will you pay for all your new shoes and jewelry?” Okay, it was officially time to end this bull shit.

“Chloe! Thank you so much for what you did last night. My fiance and I are so grateful for the way you helped me.” All three turned to look at her and it just made her want to slap some sense into the adults. Chloe looked relieved, though a little confused. The Mayor was giving her an annoyed frown while his wife was looking at her like she was garbage that shouldn’t be allowed near her. Oh that bitch was about to swallow her tongue. “I called Bruce and he said he’d call with his information since I still can’t find my wallet. It was so sweet of you to hold it for us. Your daughter is such an amazing problem solver.” Both parents blinked at her like she’d told them the world was ending.

“And who exactly are you?” Of course the mother recovered first. Selina was going to enjoy wiping that superior expression off her face.

“Oh, I’m so sorry for not introducing myself properly. I’m Selina Kyle, Bruce Wayne’s fiance. He’ll be joining me in a few days to visit his sons.” All the blood drained from the Mayor’s face and his wife’s jaw went slack with surprise. “I was just going to go stay with the boys when I realized I didn’t have my wallet but Chloe assured me you’d be able to work with me. I am sorry for any inconvenience the delay caused but I’m sure Bruce will be happy to compensate you for the trouble since your daughter was so helpful and accommodating. Now, if you two wouldn’t mind I’d like to steal her for a bit.” She put an arm around Chloe and dragged her away before either could get their bearings back.

“That was… I don’t even… thank you?” Poor kid sounded so confused.

“Any time. I live to create drama. Well, drama for other people at least.” Chloe just gave her an uncertain smile. “How’s Marinette doing this morning?” The girl let out a few curses before changing course to the front desk.

“I can’t believe I let them make me forget why I came down here in the first place.” When she got to the counter she cleared her throat to get the attendant’s attention. When he saw her he paled. “Excuse me but has anyone had time to-”

“Liquid allergy medication. You didn’t specify non-drowsy or not so we got both.” The poor guy practically shoved a bag at Chloe who just looked inside before letting out a relieved sigh. She handed the man some money and he looked like his brain melted.

“Thank you Armond. Please share that with whoever had to go get this for me.” She turned around and headed to the elevator. The desk clerk just kept looking between the girl’s back and the money she’d handed him in obvious confusion. That was something to ask about later. She caught up to Chloe just as she changed directions again, this time towards the front doors. There was a very large man arguing with two very nervous doormen. “It’s okay. I asked him here, you can let him in.” The two shared a relieved look and let the man pass. Chloe just motioned at him to follow her and went for the elevator again. The man glowered at Selina when she entered the elevator with them.

“Nice to meet you too.” That just got a grunt.

“It’s okay Digg. She knows and I’m fairly certain she’s on our side.” Another grunt. He was almost as expressive as Bruce. “I just need you to stay here and watch after Mari. Tikki will explain and help you with dosing.”

“What’s wrong with the Guardian?” Actual words. So he could speak. Wait Guardian?

“Pigheaded stupidity for the most part.” Selina couldn’t help the laugh that came out. Judging by her wince, Chloe hadn’t meant to say that out loud. “She’s having problems with insomnia and overworking herself. We’re trying to make sure she gets at least one day of proper rest so she doesn’t burn out.” Digg was frowning at her.

“You need rest too. I’ll watch over both of you.” Chloe opened her mouth to argue but Plagg flew out of her pocket and into her face.

“Digg’s right. You’re both unbalanced and being together will help the both of you remain calm. There are no immediate threats and you both deserve a break. You’ve been tense ever since you let her out of your sight and your parents just made matters worse.” Selina rolled her eyes. That had to be the understatement of the year. Looking at Chloe she could see the bags under her eyes and the obvious tightness around her mouth and eyes. She forced the girl to look at her.

“You can’t help anyone if you don’t take care of yourself. You said last night that there were other people who could handle any emergencies that may happen. You need to slow down and take a breath. I’ll run interference with your parents if need be and everything else can wait.” She was not prepared for the girl to burst into tears.

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[misskittysmagicportal]

Three characters who live in your head rent free and why?

Thanks @badsext, and now I have to think about it. Some of them are immediate. One has been lifelong

Selina Kyle: There's just something about her. The way she carries herself. Her confidence and sarcasm and inability to stump the Greatest Detective in The World. Her fierce love, loyalty and protective nature and desire to shake the system. It's who inspired me to create Honey, and she's influenced some of who I am today

Darren Treacy: I love a good anti-hero. Although Darren may hinge more on Chaotic Neutral than True Neutral. He's done some bad things for the wrong reason, and some for the right. I love characters with a hidden complexity who deserve redemption. Steve Carolan saw fit that Darren deserved four bullets to the back of his head instead. 👀 (Yall hate Overman so much, at least Nathan lives. So much living). I've just spent three days trying to come up with a way to save Darren's life which includes: time travel, magic portals, Billy Delaney, Saint Patrick's Day and The Butterfly Effect. 😩

Wanda Maximoff: Long has she been one of my favorite mutants (tied with Rogue and Wolverine.) She's literally Earth's Mightiest Hero (Carol Danvers too!) Watching her best storyline unfold weekly in only a way MCU can give us has been a lifelong dream of mine. And Elizabeth's portrayal is just 🤌🏻💋

Ok @neuroticpuppy @frogs--are--bitches @slutforrobbiebro Youre next?

[lilhurricane]

life’s a bitch and now, so am i 🖤🐈‍⬛

selina kyle aka catwoman

[trashystar420]

Babysitter Maribat reverse age AU

“No Grayson DO NOT TOUCH THAT!!!” Shouted the eldest Brother in the mansion, as his youngest baby brother, Richard Grayson pressed a mysterious red button that was actually linked to a near by explosive.

Explosions ensue

“EAT SHIT DEMON SPAWN!!!” As the second youngest, Jason Todd fires at the ex-assassin with rocket launchers.

“Can you two please not make so much noise, I’m trying to work on the current case with Joker!” Shouted a tired Tim Drake, second oldest son of the Wayne family.

Followed by the explosives from the rockets launched by Jason.

“Todd I SWEAR I will not hesitate to use my katana!” Shouted a rather pissed off Damien Wayne. Somehow, the young lad had sliced one of the rockets in half and redirected the other towards a nearby chair.

In all the chaos that ensued, a rather, stressed Bruce Wayne collapsed on a hard-wooden table, lookin utterly done with life and all that is his family.

“Where did I go wrong.” He muttered to himself. His faithful and only sane adult in the family standing near his side placed a comforting hand on the older bat’s shoulder.

“Perhaps we hire a babysitter for the two troublemakers?” He suggested.

“Who is going to babysit those two? They don’t even act normal, they are a hazard to themselves and everyone else in Gotham!” He whispered shouted, so utterly done with the drama of his demonic boys.

...

...

...

“Hey Mari-Dear, would you please help me dress for my date tonight, Brucie and I are going out to a late-night dinner and I really want to make this extra special.” Selina Kyle asked her favorite designer.

“Don’t worry Miss.Selina, I’ll make you so beautiful Monsieur Wayne won’t be able to take his eyes off you!” The Young woman replied confidently. An elegant dress the shade of midnight, that reveled her clients’ left leg and thigh. A very mature look, but one Selina could strut in. It was rather time consuming getting all the intricate designs into her dress, but nothing impossible. Not for Marinette Dupain-Cheng, of course.

On the table was Selina’s phone and it was buzzing. The elegant, older lady picked it up with her dainty hand, only to read that it was Alfred, usually not a good thing. Especially on the day her and Bruce planned for a romantic getaway. Usually meant something terrible came up. Selina answered the phone.

“ Alfred dear, what went wrong now?” She sighed. This has been the FIFTH time Bruce stood her up. FIFTH. She was starting to feel lonely at night.

“Afraid the little ones cause some explosions to go off in the mansion, and Bruce is not feeling so confident in letting Master Damien handle the babysitting, as they don’t listen to him” the butler delivered. Selina gave a questioning look.

“Explosives?! How the hell did that happen?!” She nearly shouted, but it was loud enough for the Bluenette to hear.

“Is everything alright?” The worried Bluenette asked. Selina gave her a reassuring nod, before listening to more of Alfred’s rambling.

“So your telling me that Bruce needs a babysitter otherwise he can’t come?” Summarized the anti-hero. Alfred on the other line gave a nod and confirmed her statement. Selina made a ‘tsk’ sound, clearly displeased by the events that unfolded. She couldn’t find fault in her beloved Bruce, it’s not his fault his kids are uncontrollable, mostly. He can lack in the emotional department.

Marinette perked up at the mention of needing a last minute babysitter, and when she listened in on the conversation on the phone, suddenly felt bad for her client. Selina didn’t deserve to be stood up like this.

But then Mari had an idea.

“Hey Miss, what if I could babysit? That way you and your boyfriend can actually enjoy yourselves?” The young lady offered. Selina perked up at the offer, but quickly shook her head. Covering the phone as to block the sounds of the conversation.

“A-Are you sure darling? The boys tend to be a bit, on the destructive side. They might actually destroy half the mansion in less then five minutes, trust me, I’ve seen and been there first hand.” Marinette placed her hands on her hips and gave a confident smile.

“I‘ve babysat before, and trust me, I KNOW how bad they can get, but with enough experience under my belt, I assure you that I can handle it, though if I’m going to do this, I’m going to need to know who I’m to babysit and what do they like?” And with a simple nod, Selina told Alfred the plan. The butler reluctantly agreed.

...

...

...

The sounds of the doorbell ringing echoed throughout the mansion, as Afred opened the door already well aware of who the guests would be tonight.

“Alfred dear! It’s so good to see you!” As the older woman kissed both sides of the butlers cheeks. Then she scanned the mansion for her dear.

“Where is he?” She asked innocently, but was seething inside. Marinette gave Selina a look. Selina was an impatient woman, one you don’t want to trifle with. Whoever the Bruce guy is must really be worth all the wait, Mari thought.

“Ah you must be the babysitter Selina talked about on the phone?” Asked the butler, and said babysitter gave a nod to confirm his inquiry.

“Alfred, show Mari Dear around the place, while I go look for that poor excuse of a fiancé of mine” as Selina stormed off towards the one place she knew damn well he’d be at. The clacking of the high heels fading into the background. Mari gave a nervous smile as she offered a macaroon to the family butler.

“Macaroon?” She offers, and he accepts. After taking a bite, he pauses, and is surprised to find just how good this simple treat was.

“I must say Miss Dupain-Cheng, I am surprised to find this macaroon exquisite. Tell me where did you get these?”

“ oh I um baked them myself.”

Alfred had to do a double take, because did he hear that right, she BAKES!?!? Just how many talents does this young lady have?!

“I must say Miss. Dupain-Cheng-Marinette.” Interrupted the Bluenette, before giving a sheepish smile at him.

“Please call me Marinette, I don’t exactly do well with formalities, and my last name can be a pain to say every time, so please I’d prefer if you would call me by my first name” Alfred gave a smirk.

“ only if you call me Alfred” the Bluenette giggles at his antics and agrees to the butlers demands.

“Do you think they will like them? The macaroons?” She asked pensively.

“ oh definitely! Just be sure they won’t eat too many.” He warned playfully. Mari nods. The two continue the tour of the mansion, while the rest of the family have a serious meeting down in the batcave.

...

...

...

“ Todd if you don’t put down that gun right now I’m gonna -you’re gonna what Demon Spawn? Shove this up my ass?” The barbaric Jason Todd shouted at his prissy, and totally a bitch, older brother Damien Wayne. Dick was currently snickering at his older brothers antics, while Tim looked ready to fall asleep.

Bruce gave a defeated sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose to relieve some stress. And then Selina bursts through the door.

“BRUCE!!!” Said man gave another defeated sigh as he was pulled away by the well dressed woman. Everyone else followed suit.

Hey everyone, thanks for readying this, this was the first fanfic I’ve ever done, so yeah.

[cxt-skrxtch-a]

Selina Kyle

                                          As I was saying                    I’m a woman and can’t be taken for granted.                                  Life’s a bitch, now so am I.

Independent Selina Kyle / Catwoman Roleplay Blog

Est. 5-12-19

All Muses Welcome!

Semi-Selective

Para preferred

Multiverse, multi-ship

AU friendly

             ASK | RULES | BIOGRAPHY | BACKGROUND | VERSES

[onelastbreath-writes]

On Bruce And Texting:

Author’s Note: Hello and welcome, this is my first properly written fic, originally posted to my AO3, and now that I have finally created a writing blog, it’s here as well. Please enjoy!!  AO3.  Masterlist

Warnings: Hopefully none, its all cute and fluff <3

Summary: Bruce Wayne texts like he's sending correspondences to the Queen, so of course the little monsters he calls children just have to make fun of him! Brats, the lot of them, but he wouldn't have them any other way.

Features: Bruce Wayne/Selina Kyle, all the bats and birds, mentions JL, no crime fighting, only family fluff, jokes and nods to Millennial and GenZ shenanigans.

Word Count: 2.7k

---

Billionaire, genius, tech expert, father of many children, and all around up-to-date-with-just-about-everything type of person he may be, it is also a well-known Fact that Bruce Wayne, the Batman(TM) himself, can’t text to save his life.

Whether it’s due to his Very Proper English Upbringing, his inability to be informal via written correspondences of any type, his indifference, or the fact that it bothers his children so much, Bruce Wayne has not and never will text with anything less than perfect grammar, spelling, and formality. If he has not sent you a proper letter (featuring a dedication, indentation for every paragraph, signature, and post-script when applicable), he did, in fact, not send you that text. Informality is not his Batman Way(TM) according to his children... he’s not too sure what that even means, but it makes his young ones laugh so it’s probably fine?  

His oldest children (Richard and Jason) were raised in the time of Change, where computers, internet access, social media, and all things similar were only just being introduced into households en-masse. They were young enough to remember a time without such devices and connectivity (both for very different reasons, of course, but they grew up without the newest technology none-the-less). They could understand his relationship to the digital environment more so than his younger children, but they still tended to poke fun at his ‘texting blunders’ regularly. All his kids somehow ended up as brats. He doesn’t know how this happened. It’s certainly not his fault. He blames the League members, and especially Clark Kent, for their defiant personalities. 

His younger children, whom he loves dearly, like to confuse him as much as they possibly can with their slang, egregious spelling errors, and all-around ‘internet humour’. He doesn’t know what ‘wig’ or ‘worm’ or ‘oof’ or anything means. He has no idea what those dances are, or how they relate to the music that seems to always accompany them, and for the love of all that is good, don’t ask him what he thinks of this or that ‘meme’. What even is a ‘meme’, and should he be more concerned about his kids being obsessed with them? He tries, oh my god, does he try to follow the children’s conversations, but they somehow all learned a language he has no idea how to decrypt. His best response to them once they start speaking in tongues is as follows: smile but not too much, listen to child even though he is deeply confused, and pat child on head or shoulder when they are finished and are looking for assurance.  

He refuses to be a parent who ignores or tunes out his children, so he always makes sure to put down his work, his crossword, his tools, or whatever else is in his hands when a child searches him out for a conversation. But somehow, despite all the time he spends around them and their strange words, when he gets text from them comprised of abbreviations, acronyms, and completely random words, he goes a little cross eyed. He would never tell anyone, but he keeps a running list on his phone about the things they say that he has had to translate in the past. Spilling tea? Speaking the truth, usually to do with gossip. Wow? Multiple possible meanings: either a video game, or someone saying it (different pronunciation depending on context and who sent the text). Stickbug? A nice little prank with no ulterior motives, just for fun. Something along the lines of “this basic bitch Karen at the grocery store who is a dirty rat-licker and is def an anti-vaxxer just took 45 (forty-five) minutes to decide she didn’t actually want that almond milk. I Stan the cashier who had to put up with her. Rad af dude.” roughly translates to “A rude, middle-aged white woman who wasn’t wearing a mask and doesn’t believe in disease control or vaccinating her children wasted a great deal of an essential worker’s time in the checkout line. The cashier was very professional in their dealings with said customer and should be commended on their actions.”  

Given enough time, the internet for searching up new slang words, and occasionally some help from a friend (Alfred, Selina, Lucius, another of his children, etc), Bruce could decode and respond appropriately to most texts. He was quite proud of these achievements, and although he didn’t always like how often his children were on their phones or computers or gaming systems, he was quite proud of how integrated and easily they adapted to the ever-evolving world of electronics. All his kids were gifted in many ways, but their ability to learn, their hunger for knowledge, and their perseverance when exploring new and challenging ideas were always the things that he was most impressed by.  

He could do without their comments though. Yes, surprisingly, he did manage to get girlfriends with his type of texting. No, he doesn’t miss the ‘good old days’ when telegraphs were the main form of long-distance correspondence (how old do these brats think he is?!). And yes, he does know what a “tweet” is, and how to “post” on his social media accounts, and what “sliding into your DMs” is (thanks to a frantic search after a WE employee mentioned it near him). The Wayne children, truly whom and what Bruce considers his pride and joy, are cruel little jerks to him sometimes. His hoard of parenting books fails to mention what one should do when their children gang up on them. Bullying is covered of course, but he can’t really talk to a teacher or his guardian about how his second son calls him an idiot sandwich, or that his third son regularly tries to get him to do something “For The Vine”. His oldest and youngest boys are only slightly better in the bullying him department; Richard and his puppy dog eyes when he wants to do something dangerous or not-Alfred-approved, and Damian and his growing collection of pets because “Mother never let me have them, and I am deprived, and don’t you love me Father?”.  

His only good child is his beautiful daughter Cassandra, the flower of the Wayne clan. She gives him hugs, and pats his hands, and can sit with him and just enjoy the quiet and stillness when his other children are not around. Her language skills are improving by leaps and bounds every day, and her heart and spirit are unparalleled, but her main method of communication is in her movements. Her hands, her posture, her dancing; Bruce couldn’t think of a more graceful, fluid, powerful person if the world depended on it. His amazing little girl doesn't bully him (and if she ever does, he probably deserves it, he trusts her), so he turns to her most of all when it comes to communicating with someone else. She doesn’t let him send anything that is “sketchy” or “wrong words, bad meaning, Dad”. He would give the world to his children, but for Cassandra, he would destroy it and build her an entirely new one.

Social media, especially with his terrible children all having accounts dedicated to making him look like a simpleton, was another rocky terrain he had to navigate on the regular. He had professionals in place at WE to run the company’s many accounts, paid top dollar to help appeal and relate to the masses, but he mostly had to manage his personal accounts himself. And so, @TheRealBruceWayne was one of the greatest struggles in his adult life. Why can’t he just retweet every post from @WE_Offical and leave it at that? People should only want to know about what’s new with the company. What do you mean they want to know more about our family and private lives? That’s unnecessary, and not important to the running of the company, right? Right? Why are you laughing?!

Luckily, most people in his life aren’t so intimately aware of his struggles. He can act and lie all he wants about being “hip” and “woke” and whatever else the kids are saying these days when he’s with the JL or in board meeting intermissions, networking with his associates. The Batman knows all and sees all, Green Lantern, of course he understands how “Tiktok” works. The Batman is a robot without a funny bone in his body, Green Arrow, but I did witness him sigh and say “same” when he knocked his cup of coffee over while on monitor duty once. No matter how badly his darling children call him out, the Justice League would be so much worse. So, it’s one of his most importantly guarded secrets... even more so than his secret identity at this point. Being unmasked in front of every Gotham rogue would be less detrimental to him than his “friends” learning of his utter ineptitude in staying on top of the younger generations’ lingo.  

When questioned why the League doesn’t have a group chat or a forum or anything that they can use to contact each other outside of world ending matters and communicator (”because we’re friends, Batman! Ma and Pa Kent would love to have everyone over for a barbecue!”), the person who dared even mention texting isn’t even given a verbal response. They are just glared at, silently, often for several uninterrupted minutes, frozen in place only able to breathe shallowly in fear of setting off the Bat. “You know why” his glare says, “I’ll eat you, your family, and everything you have ever held dear” the younger members hear. No one makes the mistake of asking about it twice.  

Outside of his children and Alfred, and his small circle of true friends involved in all aspects of his life, there is only one more person Bruce allows to know of his Darkest Secret. Selina. Someone most people would recommend he not be involved with. Catwoman: accomplished thief, distraction, chaos-incarnate most nights, and his significant other. Sharp as a whip (ha) and crafty like no one’s business; he is head-over-heels. On again/Off again and all over the place their long romance has been, but no one has ever challenged him, intrigued him, like this clever, beautiful, amazing woman has. He’s brought his partners around his children before, both for their judgement, and for their worst behaviours to vet out any “unworthy” suitors. He trusts them explicitly to tell him the truth about those he allows into the manor; were they rude about Bruce wanting to have group outings, did they say something about Bruce’s money, did they get angry or shout or make anyone uncomfortable while they were here? If his children even looked slightly unhappy with someone he brought them to meet, that person would not be invited back. Children, he finds, have the best sight when meeting people; no motives other than finding safety and love, no fear of consequences from speaking honestly...  

Selina, or Catwoman, as they had known her first, was someone all of his kids liked without issue right off the bat. She would make puns and play word games with Richard, his first Robin, tiny, still working on his English, able to connect with him over their acrobatic abilities. His second Robin, Jason, skittish and feisty as an alley cat, knew of Catwoman and her daring escapades long before Bruce found him. The young boy had a few heroes, and no one (not even Wonder Woman) could compare to the incredible burglar who bought food and jackets and medicine for the street kids in Crime Alley. She was saintly in his eyes, and to this day, Bruce was still working on convincing Jason he was good enough for Selina. Tim and Cass and Stephanie (basically another daughter to Bruce, she spends so much time with the family) all joined the Wayne clan around the same time and officially met Selina as a friend and partner of his, and in the good graces of his first two sons. Selina, in all her nightly business, and many travels and acquaintances, had met the three independently, helping Tim get home safely back to Drake Manor when he escaped to photograph Batman and Robin in the dank darkness of Gotham when he was just a young boy, spending some time with Cassandra when her despicable father left her alone long enough to recover from his rough treatment, showing her the first scraps of kindness in her short life, and watching over and protecting Stephanie as she followed and sabotaged her father Cluemaster and his criminal activities. There was no need to win them over once they met her civilian identity, she had already gained their favour and acceptance, and they were happy to have her near their new family. Damian, his youngest, his biological son, took the longest to warm up to Selina. He would never fault his little boy for fighting so hard against a woman that was not his birth mother, especially after all the manipulation and cruelty dealt to him by Talia for the first decade of his life. But as he began to learn about his father, these people in his father’s life, and this woman that was Not His Mother but “still okay, I guess”, he grew to see her as acceptable. Her cats definitely helped, he’d say, no one with cats that loyal and happy can be a bad person.  

Selina, the love of his life, he’d admit quietly to himself, was also a dirty traitor and in cahoots with his terrible children. She would say his texting skills were “sweet” and “very gentlemanly” when she was asked by anyone outside the family, and privately to him she would say she thought they were “adorable” and “please don’t ever change, Bruce, I like it.” However, nothing seemed to bring her more joy than his children sending her texts and “Snaps” and “memes” about him to her. Sometimes it was screenshots of the family group chat that they forced him to join, where he would post “To whom it may concern...” and “In regards to...” when he needed to reach all his delinquents in a timely manner. Sometimes it was video clips of him staring at his phone intently, then typing something on his laptop, then him reading and nodding along, and then finally going back and responding to the text he received with a small, pleased smile. And sometimes, when he got too injured or was too incapacitated to text coherently, he’d have his nearest able child transcribe his text to her. Depending on who was texting her for Bruce, she could expect many different things. From Dick, she’d get lots of shorthand and silly emojis, and many, many, winky and crying/laughing faces in brackets depending on what Bruce had made him type. Jason, bless him, used proper English most of the time, but would never write a single word of Bruce’s soliloquy to her, instead she enjoyed the TL;DR version: “hurt again, missing you, come home soon, blah blah blah, sappy gross words here, love you”. Tim would allow speech recognition to run on Bruce’s phone, and just let it go until the man passed out. Stephanie, the little chaos child, would film it and send it to her, including all her muffled laughter and shaky camera shots of Bruce emoting with his available undamaged limbs. Cass, still more versed in physicality and emotive movement, would interpret Bruce’s text into mostly emojis, hearts and happy faces and animals, but would include photos, and phrases that she found important enough to type out for Selina. Damian, forever his Father’s son in any way possible, texts very formally, referring to her or his siblings Bruce mentions by last name only, and lots of “Father requests me to tell you...” and “Kyle, know that Father...”. She adores these kids, and once Bruce recovers enough to text her himself, or she gets back to the Manor, they get to laugh about whatever she was sent this time.  

So, while it’s true that Bruce couldn’t text his way out of a wet paper bag, and his kids are sometimes brats about it, there’s probably a lot of different reasons he doesn’t spend too much time trying to improve his skills. Whether it’s the smiles of his children, the giggles of his significant other, or the warm feeling in his chest when he sees all his important people bonding over him, well, in the end, who’s to say?

[vampirecorleone]

“Honey, I’m home! Oh, I forgot. I’m not married.” “As I was saying, I’m a woman and can’t be taken for granted. Life’s a bitch, now so am I.” “You’re the second man who killed me this week, but I’ve got seven lives left.”

Selina Kyle aka Catwoman

[comicsqueens]

365 live action comicsqueens [1/365]: Selina Kyle, Batman Returns (1992)

“Life’s a bitch, now so am I!”

(request a queen)

[redhoodieone]

Here with You

A/N: Hi everyone! This is my first requested fluffy fic from @yeetthatpussy. Thank you so much for the idea! This was fun and a big change for me since all I do is write smut and nasty things hahaha. Also, I want to point out I did not give Bruce an age or the reader, since I believe readers should imagine Bruce and themselves the way they want. I personally imagine Bruce like how he was in the animated movie, “Justice League War” since I happened to be watching that particular movie a while ago (because some of you might imagine Ben Affleck, Christian Bale, or the new Robert Pattinson). So other than that enjoy the story!

@randomdcfangirl @jasonredtoddhood @lady-of-the-abyss @psychovigilantewrites Enjoy this my friends.

Warnings: Language and just pure pink, yummy fluffy cotton candy!

It became a habit; a tradition really, when Bruce and I would have free time to hang out. Every Friday night is our “friend date time”, the title came from Bruce, when he realized over the past two months that I’m the first female in his life who has remained by his side and hasn’t put up with his bullshit.

True, women have come and gone throughout his life, specifically Selina Kyle. I’m no stranger to her, since she has played a pretty big part in Bruce’s life. Although she was always civil to me, I admit, I couldn’t help but feel envious of her beauty and body.

I sometimes wonder why Bruce permanently let her go.

I consider myself average. Maybe not overly beautiful like supermodels, but I’ve been told by family and friends I’m awfully pretty, sweet, funny, and kind. I’m about average height, and I admit I do have feminine curves. But overall, I’ve learned to love myself, and I’ve also had my fair share of ex-boyfriends and dates.

But none of my relationships have lasted more than three months. Considering my anxiety and what my doctor has described as PTSD from the eight year mental and physical abuse from my alcoholic father and uncle, my past boyfriends left me because I’m a nutcase (they really didn’t know how to help me or understand my past and current issues). Let’s just say I’m too much to handle when I’m alone or in a too comfortable environment.

And my latest ex-boyfriend Josh (who was a sweetheart, but I broke up with him because I just couldn’t be in another relationship at that moment) has been hinting to get back together with me for some time. But after I realized I’m never going to be able to move on from my past, I accept the fact that I should be alone and stay alone.

Because at least I would never betray or hurt myself, I believe.

But here I am. I’m being escorted to our usual table at one of Bruce’s restaurants. The waiter smiles once we meet up with Bruce at our table.

Knowing Bruce for a few years has given me reason maybe some men aren’t so bad. The media and tabloids have always painted him as a man-whore and spoiled rich boy, but after witnessing the doofus trip over his own shoes at work, (I happened to be at Wayne Enterprises for an interview with him, as I am a journalist) I realized he was exactly like everyone else.

Clumsy, foolish, and funny.

Bruce stands to greet me, while looking extremely handsome in black suit. His hair is nicely combed, and his grin is his usual smirk. His blue eyes brighten the room from its golden décor.

“Y/N, you look beautiful,” Bruce compliments me, with a kiss to the cheek.

It’s true. I feel more confident tonight since I’m wearing my favorite short black Gucci dress. I decided to curl my hair a bit and wear little makeup since I try very hard to look more natural to love myself more.

“You’re not so bad yourself, Bruce,” I respond politely. I sit down, and he pushes my chair in. As he takes his seat, the waiter quickly brings our appetizers of loaded potato skins and mozzarella cheese sticks and marinara sauce. “Didn’t you want to stay home and order pizza and watch a movie?”

“We did that last week. I figured...why not treat my favorite girl to a fancy dinner so we can talk shit about the rich people around us while we pig out on our favorite food?” Bruce answers, and gives me a soft smile.

“I guess you have a point since food is always a way to win me over,” I chuckle and then raise an eyebrow at him. “Did you just say I’m your favorite girl?”

“Well, you are Y/N. I mean, you gave me a chance to show you the real me. You didn’t let the media and tabloids change your mind about me. You know me better than most people think they do. Hell, you’ve even been there for me during the anniversary of my parents’ deaths. You’ve even seen me in my darkest times, and not once did you leave me or try to change who I am,” Bruce confesses softly. It sounds as if he wants to continue on with his confession, but he stops himself. He ends up smirking at me. “Anyways, is Josh still bothering you so you can take him back?”

“No, I mean…I haven’t heard from him today. What about Selina?” I tease him back.

“I haven’t spoken to her in four months. But I guess I wouldn’t know if she’s called the manor considering you take up most of my time anyways. I swear, the more we hang out with each other, the more we become like a married couple.”

“A married couple?” I repeat.

“Yes, since we’re always together and you know me better than any other woman. Hell, I don’t think I even allow most women to know certain details about my parents’ deaths or my sons. I have to protect so much of my life, but with you, I just found out I want to protect you as well,” Bruce explains.

I’m stunned to hear this right now. Of course, I know about Bruce’s parents’ deaths. I even know about his sons: Dick, Jason, Tim, and Damian, too.

The sweet, handsome charming Dick Grayson.

The tough, strong and huggable teddy bear man Jason Todd.

The smart, wise, and computer genius Tim Drake.

And of course, the small, mature, handsome Damian Wayne, Bruce’s miniature version of him.

I knew Dick, Jason, and Tim were Bruce’s adopted sons (and he loves and worries about them so much) and I’ve even come to love every one of them, especially Damian. Bruce had told me Damian’s mother had left him with Bruce, and even though Damian had been arrogant, rude, and sometimes defensive, he’s come to respect me and even likes me hanging around the manor as long as I don’t steal his father most of the time.

And being close to all of them, I see Bruce has made a wonderful family, and I envy almost everything about that.

I even know Alfred. He’s a one real son of a bitch who doesn’t put up with Bruce either.

But the way Bruce is speaking of me kindly is starting to freak me out. I was never one to receive compliments or kindness before.

I decide to change the subject quickly. We both serve ourselves our favorite appetizers and dig in.

“So, what are your sons doing tonight? Causing trouble or just lounging around the manor?” I ask, with a small smile.

But Bruce seems to not realize what I did; unless he’s hiding it.

“Dick is probably out with Barbara. And I believe Jason, Tim, and Damian are bothering Alfred for their usual nighttime snacks,” Bruce replies, and then exhales heavily. “Y/N...I-I really need to talk to you and I just need you to listen.”

“Bruce...” I warn him. My heart already aches because I’ve been keeping a secret of my own and I finally realize what frightens me.

Bruce.

Bruce terrifies me.

Why?

Because I’m in love with him.

My mind flashes back to the memories of when Bruce tripped, and how everyone chucked at the Prince of Gotham, and how I helped him with a small smile on my face, because he took my breath away with his natural charm and handsome good looks. And when he showed up at my apartment with pizza and horror movies because I was too sick to leave and go out into the chilly rainstorm.

Or how when my younger sister got married, Bruce offered to be my “date” since he knew I couldn’t find a date in time. But he also showered the bride and groom with gifts and surprised my sister and my new brother-in-law with an amazing already paid honeymoon to Paris and Italy for an entire week! The whole night we spent dancing together, my head rested against his chest, and then I suddenly felt my heart beating inhumanly fast and slow at the same time.

Bruce’s hands remained on me the entire night. Just him touching me made me feel I was dancing on clouds the entire night.

Just the thought of Bruce makes me want to faint and fall because these feelings are scaring the shit out of me.

“Please listen to me, Y/N. I need to tell you what’s been going on in my head lately, because I don’t know how much longer I can keep it to myself,” Bruce begins, appearing more nervous than before. The usual confidence and smile on his face is now replaced with his eyes pleading for me to listen to him and his body is tense. “I-I don’t think I can keep pretending to be your best friend anymore. I can’t keep acting like I just want to be your friend. I can’t stick around anymore and see you date assholes who don’t know the real beautiful, kind, funny girl, you really are. Just the thought of you dating them makes me want to beat the shit out of them and possibly drop them off on a deserted island forever...okay that last part was supposed to be a joke, but I guess my sense of humor is different than most. Maybe I’m not kidding at all...”

I can feel my stomach hurt from this stressful situation. Bruce sees me eyeing the exit.

“Y/N, I-I love you. I love you so much that just saying these words isn’t common for me, because after all these years of meaningless dates, hookups, and reckless partying, I think I see why love is very rare. I didn’t think I would ever fall in love, and I even trained myself not to either. My parents were the true definition and example of love, and with them gone, I suppose I really let myself fall more into the darkness and isolation than I ever thought I could reach. But knowing you, you just showed up in my life as sunshine; just bursting with energy and life in a room when all my life I felt alone. W-what I’m really trying to say is, I want us to give us a chance.”

I slowly look up at him. I instantly felt betrayed, as if this is just a joke. “You...want to date me?” I barely whisper.

“Of course, Y/N. I’m serious about this,” Bruce says, appearing as if I’ve offended him and doubted him. He looks distraught and anxious. “I’m-I’m in love with you. I want us to be together. Official.”

When those words leave Bruce’s mouth, I suddenly realize, he’s NEVER, EVER said those words before. The words sound raw and rare; like a child speaking for the first time in their lives.

The thought of being close to a man like Bruce sends waves of paranoia and fright throughout my body. The last time I was intimate or even lying next to a man resulted in nightmares and fears of being hurt all over again.

I was just a child when my father and uncle would come home from work drunk, and how they would request my little sister and I to climb in bed with them. Being the oldest, I tried my hardest to protect my sister, and I ended up fighting them back; defending us from their violent drunken behavior.

Which always resulted with me getting hit, slapped, kicked, and thrown to the ground. Even though I eventually learned to fight back, I would always panic and feel defenseless until I fight back.

But it would always come down to that first hit to the face that would make every memory and nightmare come back to life for me.

I can just feel my father’s fist striking my mouth again.

The pain feels real again.

“How could you be in love with me if you don’t know a thing about me?” I ask. I realize I sound harsh and bitter.

“What?”

“Let me just say one thing, Bruce. You don’t really know me, because I only let you see what I want you to see,” I snap. I fill with sudden anger and pain. If only Bruce knew the real me. If only Bruce saw what kind of pathetic mess I am. “Unlike you, your life is Gotham’s most known story of your parent’s generosity, luxury, and their deaths. You don’t have to hide anything. I myself, have to hide a lot just so I don’t lose my mind and get locked up in Arkham and so I don’t lose those closest to me because I’m a walking, fucking time-bomb. Do you know how hard it is to put on a strong, brave, face even when I want to cry and show everyone how hurt I am and how much pain I go through each day?! You don’t because your life is fucking perfect, so why don’t you leave me alone and go find the perfect girl because I’m too damaged to love and fix!”

The pain, anger, and fear take over me. I knock all glasses of wine and plates of food off the table and I storm out, leaving a poor, terrified Bruce Wayne behind.

I’m rushing down the sidewalk to go far away, anywhere from here. The tears fall down my cheeks, and I start to hate myself even more for letting my past get the best of me.

After everything that’s happened, I don’t think I’m fully capable of being in love, in a serious relationship, married, having children, or just a family in general.

Only good people have that; the people who were never hurt or touched dangerously in their whole lives.

Just when I think I’m far away, Bruce manages to catch up to me by running VERY fast. He grabs my arm to stop me, and just that forceful touch awakens something within me: I go into defense mode to protect myself.

Just like all those years ago.

“Don’t fucking touch me!” I yell. My fist makes a hard connection to Bruce’s jaw; knocking him to the ground.

People around are watching us; gasping and pointing at us. Bruce looks up at me and holds his jaw. “Ow...”

I begin to breathe heavily before I begin to cry again. Bruce immediately gets back on his and comes to me.

“Y/N...please tell me what’s bothering you,” Bruce says softly. He doesn’t lie a hand on me, but he’s watching me intently.

“My past. I-I can’t seem to move forward without having to be dragged back every mile,” I answer quietly.

“Is this about your father and uncle?”

My eyes widen. I look up at him. “How did you-”

“You talk in your sleep. I’ve heard you have nightmares before, and after listening and lying beside you for some time, I put the pieces together. They abused you, and you tried to get out,” Bruce admits, before he sighs. “The reason why I never told you I knew about it is because I wasn’t sure if telling you was...appropriate, and considering you never made the attempt to tell me yourself. I just...didn’t want to cross a line and make you feel more pain, but I suppose I fucked up by not saying anything.”

“It’s not your fault. I always figured, ‘why bring it up if you’re just going back to past when you just want to be here’...in the present,” I mutter under my breath.

I think back on the times Bruce and I would fall asleep on his couch. After our movie nights, I would fall asleep on his arm and he would hold me until the morning came. Ever since then, the couch has been like a bed to us; the closest to a bed we’d ever share.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I-I didn’t know how much pain you’ve been in. But please let me help you,” Bruce begs, and reaches out to touch my hands but removes them quickly after what happened. “You don’t have to be alone during this time. Let me be there like you were there for me.”

“I’m never going to get better, Bruce. I have so many ugly scars, I could never be loved for who I am and what I've been through. After all this time, I thought I would be my best, but I ended up just getting worse. Maybe I should just give up and be at peace with myself for the first time in forever,” I whisper. “I’ll just keep trying again and again, because I don’t think there’s a reason to keep going forward, because I never will.”

Bruce’s mouth opens to speak, and the horror takes over his face when I find the little strength to stroll over to the street and walk into the fast driving cars in traffic in hopes of dying the quickest way possible.

A taxi is speeding down an open lane and is heading right for me. I stop in my tracks and look at the driver in hopes my past will never hurt me again.

Because I’ll be dead.

But strong arms pull me out of the way; knocking me and whoever saved me back onto the sidewalk. I’m on top of a big, hard body and the time I sit up to look down, I see Bruce, breathing hard.

“Y/N, are you okay?” Bruce asks me. He sits up as I stand up. Once he’s on his feet, he quickly removes us from the eyes of the public and we both head into an abandoned alleyway.

“I would have been okay, if you didn’t stop me,” I answer, slightly angry from him stopping me. “Why did you stop me, Bruce? Why can’t you just let me finally let go of everything?”

“Because if I lost you, I wouldn’t have a reason to go on either,” he says quietly. “Please don’t ever do that again. I-I can’t lose you. I need you in my life. I need you with me.”

“What about your sons? Alfred?”

“I love them, but I also love you too, Y/N. Dying...is never the answer. It’s darkness that you’re trying to escape, but no matter what, it will be with you forever. I’ve seen death, and I’ve also seen good people who allow the darkness and fear change them into people who could never be saved. I may not know everything that happened in your past, Y/N, but I know you’re stronger than you think you are. And you’re beautiful, Y/N. Everyone has ugly scars, including me. But if you managed to get this far in life, I would say that’s an accomplishment not many people can achieve,” Bruce says softly, before he finally holds my hands. I let him, and I let myself cry more. “Trust me, there were times I almost let my inner demons take over my life and emotions. I almost let go at a young age too. But then I have come to learn from an old friend that in every darkness, there’s light. You just have to find your light, and you’ll never be alone.”

I wipe my tears and smile up at him. “Alfred?” I ask.

“Yes, Alfred taught me that. Do you know who my light is?”

“Your sons? Alfred?”

“All of you,” Bruce answers.

“Even me? How?” I ask, completely shocked.

“Because after I met you, I...I felt normal. Human. I don’t have to try too hard with you, and I don’t have to put on a face of confidence and behave like I’m better than everyone. The playboy billionaire title doesn’t exist to me, because when I’m with you, I’m here with you, and that’s all that matters to me. I can laugh at stupid jokes. I can walk around in just a t-shirt and regular jeans around you. Hell, I can even talk shit about other celebrities with you. I can even tell you about my own nightmares, and how someday, I hope I really can make my parents proud of me. I trust you with all that and only you, Y/N,” Bruce reveals.

He finally takes the first step. Lowering his head to mine, he kisses me. Our lips connect like magnets, and the heat between us is hotter than hell, I believe. With one hand, Bruce holds my face gently, as the other holds my waist.

And for the first time in forever, I’m not afraid.

After Bruce pulls away, he looks down at me with a small smile. He pushes a strand of my hair behind my ear.

“I really care about you, Y/N. I love you, and if I have to wait a bit to be with you, then I’ll wait as long as I need to,” Bruce says.

“Thank you...for being patient with me and for just being there Bruce,” I say.

“I’ll always be here for you, because there’s nowhere else I rather be than be here with you, Y/N.”

“Same for me too,” I admit.

Bruce wraps an arm around me and leads me back to the restaurant. “How about pizza?” he asks curiously.

“And a movie?”

“Of course.”

“Will the boys be there?”

“Most likely but as soon as that movie ends, they’re gone. It’ll just be you, me, and my couch.”

I smile, a real smile that’s not forced for the first time in a long while. “I’d love that. I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

“I know what you mean,” Bruce whispers to me. “Because all I want is you here with me.”

“And I’ll be here with you every day.”

Was it good? Let me know please! I’m used to smut and I think it’s safe to say that this fic was a challenge but a good one!

[eerie-embroidery]

And here she is. I am so happy with the final result. She is up on my Etsy shop with details and such.

Etsy link: Catwoman - Life's a bitch, now so am I. Cross Stitch